Seddie oneshots
by shana852963
Summary: A series of onshots based on random words centered around the Seddie relationship
1. Chapter 1

So basically these will be short, unrelated oneshots about Seddie. Enjoy!

_Manipulation _

He used to think that Carly was the master of manipulating him. Back in the eighth grade, all she had to do in order to get something out of him was smile at him and sweetly say "Please, for me?"

But then he started dating Sam, and he found out that manipulation was one of her best weapons.

"Sam, I do _not_ want to go to the Meats of the World Exhibit for our one-year anniversary," Freddie told Sam firmly.

"But it will be so cool!" she insisted.

"Why can't we do something we both want to do?" he questioned. "Like going to the beach or something."

"Seeing foreign meat is way more fun! Besides," she said with a small grin. "If we _don't_ go, this will never happen again."

She leaned towards him a kissed him passionately on his lips, pulling away after nearly two minutes, leaving Freddie completely dazed.

"So," Sam said. "Are we down for the meat exhibit?"

"Uh-huh," Freddie said, speechless.


	2. Chapter 2

_Poisoning _

The first time Sam got food poisoning, she claimed it was a betrayal from the Food Gods.

"Or maybe," Freddie said, as he held her hair back as she puked violently into Carly's upstairs toilet. "You got food poisoning from eating mayonnaise that had been sitting outside for the past five hours."

"No way," Sam said weakly. "I've eaten warm mayonnaise plenty of times and nothing like this has ever happened. I'm telling you, Benson, this is a curse from the Food Gods for not eating all of that ham last weekend."

"That ham must have weighed twenty pounds, Sam, if you had finished it you'd be in a pork-induced coma right now."

"Better than feeling like this," she muttered. "You know when Carly's getting back from her grandpa's?"

"No clue; she hasn't answered my text yet. You wanna go lay down on the couch?"

Sam nodded, and Freddie carefully helped her off the bathroom floor.

"Well," he said as he maneuvered Sam downstairs towards the Shay's couch. "Can't say this wasn't an interesting first date, can we?"

Sam showed a small smile. "No, I guess we can't."


	3. Chapter 3

_Computer_

She would never admit it, but Sam Puckett was quite gifted at using a computer. Not anywhere near Freddie's level of expertise, true, but she was still very tech-savvy.

Whenever the iCarly site crashed, and Freddie was unable to get to a computer to fix it, for whatever reason, he always called Sam to get it up and running again.

Of course, she never did this without promises of bacon, but eventually Freddie would persuade her and the site would get fixed in no time.

She never told anyone, besides Freddie and Carly, that one of the few A's she had ever received was in Web Design, a class that many students struggled with.

Freddie knew better than to bring up Sam's gift with computers, if he did he would always wind up with his foot behind his head, so he just left it as one of her many hidden talents, like tap dancing and singing.

But every now and then, when the two were alone, Sam would occasionally let a small amount of technological knowledge slip out.

And Freddie savored those moments.


	4. Chapter 4

_Cough_

"Sam, just take some medicine!"

"No! That stuff tastes worse than your mom's chicken soup!"

"You'll feel a lot better."

"Don't care, Benson. Mama's not putting that gunk down her throat."

"Sam," Freddie reasoned. "You've had that cough for over a week now. It's not going away on its own. Just take some medicine, please!"

"It is too going away," Sam insisted indignantly, holing back a cough. "Besides, why do you care so much about my cough, Benson?"

"Because, Sam," he said, sighing. "You're my friend, believe it or not, and I want you to get better."

"You just want to see me gag on the medicine," Sam said shrewdly.

"Fine," Freddie said, crossing his arms. "I give up. Don't take the medicine."

"I wasn't planning on it."

"However," he continued, smiling slyly. "Until you do come to your senses and take it, I'm going to sit at Carly's house and watch every _Galaxy Wars_ movie all weekend."

"Why would I care?"

"Because Carly's going to Yakama this weekend, and we both know you'll still be over there all the time."

"Suppose I just break the DVD player? "

"You wouldn't break it; it's Carly's," Freddie said.

"That's not fair! You can't play the Carly card!"

"I can and I did. Now then; you can either swallow the medicine and stop coughing, or enjoy a nice weekend of _Galaxy Wars _with me. It's your choice."

Sam shot Freddie the dirtiest look she could muster, and the slowly, rose the small cup of medicine to her lips, and swallowed its contents.

"There," she said. "It's gone. Now I get to control the T.V. this weekend."

"Fine," Freddie shrugged. "By the way, I lent my _Galaxy Wars_ DVDs to Gibby a month ago and he spilled gravy on them. They haven't worked since."


	5. Chapter 5

_Well (noun)_

Sam and Freddie walked through the park, both bored out of their minds. Carly was visiting her cousins, the Dorfmans, with Spencer, so the two of them were 'forced' to hang out together.

"What do you want to do?" Freddie asked, coming to a stop, looking around for something interesting.

"I dunno," Sam shrugged. "It's a park; there's nothing _to_ do."

Suddenly, Freddie spotted a well a little ways off.

"Let's go see that," he said.

"Fine," Sam sighed, following him.

"It looks like a wishing well," Freddie stated as the two got closer.

"Cool!" Sam exclaimed. "Gimme a penny, Fredwad, Mamma's got a list of wishes lined up!"

"You don't really believe in this, do you?" said Freddie, rolling his eyes. "It's complete superstition."

"Dude-"

"Here, here," Freddie said, quickly giving the blonde girl a penny from his pocket. "What are you going to wish for? I want to laugh when it doesn't happen."

"I can't tell you, 'cause then it _will_ never happen," Sam snapped. "Why don't you make a wish if you really want to see if the well works."

"Fine," Freddie said, grabbing himself another penny as he formulated his wish in his head. "But this is just throwing money away…"

"Okay, when I say go, we'll through the pennies in, okay?" Sam said.

"Whatever."

"One, two, three, GO!" Sam and Freddie both flipped their coins into the well, hearing a tiny clink as they reached the stone bottom.

"Well, that's done," Sam said. "Let's go to the Groovy Smoothie, T-Bo said he has some new flavors."

"Fine," Freddie said. "But you're buying your own smoothie this time."

"No I'm not."

As the two were walking, Sam all of the sudden tripped over a branch and stumbled into Freddie, knocking them both to the ground, in the process, their lips touched ever so briefly.

"Well," Sam said awkwardly, getting up. "Let's go then, I'm hungry."

"When are you not," Freddie muttered as Sam went off ahead of him. He felt his lips, still tingling, and turned back towards the well.

So maybe that wishing well thing wasn't so far fetched after all…


	6. Chapter 6

_Darling_

Sam and Carly were sitting on the Shay's couch, watching _Girly Cow_, when Freddie entered the apartment.

"Hola chicas," he greeted the girls, going over to sit by Sam.

"Aw, Freddie wants to sit next to his girlfriend," Carly playfully teased. Sam tossed a cushion at her best friend.

"That wasn't necessary," Cary laughed. "Anyway, I'm going to get some of my special lemonade, you guys want some?"

"No," Sam and Freddie both answered.

Carly frowned, but went off to the kitchen without a word.

"So," Freddie said, putting his arm around Sam. "Did you decide what movie you want to see for your birthday next week, darling?"

Sam snorted. "Darling? Did you really just call me that?"

"Yah, so what?"

"Come on, can't you be less of a nub and think of anything better then _darling_? 'Cause you keep that and the only girl you'll be able to call that will be your mom."

"Fine," Freddie said. "Sweetie?"

Even Carly laughed that time.

"Um, honey?"

Sam just looked at him.

"Come on, Sam, why are you so picky?"

"I'm dating you, I can't be that picky."

"Hey!"

"Relax, I'm probably just kidding."

"Okay…I know, buttercup!"

Sam thumped in the back of his head. "You're a dork."

"You know what you are?" A blonde-headed demon!"

Sam laughed. "I like that."

"What?"

"Blonde-headed demon," Sam replied, smiling. "Tough, accurate, creative…Good work, Benson."

"Wait, that's what you want your nickname to be?"

"Yup."

"Okay then," Freddie said happily, though confused.

Carly laughed, sipping her lemonade. "You guys are the weirdest couple I've ever seen. And that's including Gibby and Tasha."

Sam and Freddie both laughed, because they both knew it was true.


	7. Chapter 7

_Courage_

He tried to steady his breathing. He tried to stop his hands from sweating. He tried to stop his limbs from trembling.

But he couldn't.

What he was about to do required every ounce of courage he had packed into his body.

_Okay,_ he told himself. _There's about a three percent chance this will work out, and about a ninety-seven percent chance it will blow up in my face… But don't think of the odds!_

Feeling like it was now or never, Freddie headed across the hall to Carly Shay's apartment. Carly wasn't home, but he knew she left a spare key inside the nearby potted plant for when Spencer locked himself out of the apartment. He let himself in. The living room area was empty, but he heard the television going on in the iCarly studio. He took a deep breath, and started up the stairs.

Once at the top, he stared in through the glass door of the studio. There she was. Sam Puckett, lounging on a beanbag chair absentmindedly eating chips as she watched some fight on T.V. _This is it_, he told himself. He opened the door.

Sam turned around. "What are you doing here Fredug?"

"Sam, I-I-"

"What up with the stuttering? Forgot how to talk, Nub?"

"Well, see the thing it, I was wondering if you-you, wanted, maybe, I dunno-"

"Can you just spit it out already? I need to get back to this match! Rocker Smash and Thunder Wave are about to get into the arena!"

"Ummm, do you want to-to do that segment on iCarly with Gibby and the vat of lard?"

Sam frowned. "_That's_ what you wanted to ask me?"

"Yup," Freddie lied.

Sam looked at him suspiciously. "And you couldn't just text me that?"

"Um, my mom took my phone," Freddie said quickly. "Said cell phones cause ear sores."

Sam shrugged. "Yeah, you do get a lot of ear sores. And I'm game for that segment, but I get to keep all the extra lard!"

"Fine," Freddie said. "Well, see you around then."

"Whatever Freddipox."

Freddie closed the door behind, cursing himself for chickening out.

_I'm going to do it next time,_ he told himself firmly. _Next time I try, I WILL ask out Sam Puckett. _


	8. Chapter 8

_Plus_

"Freddie, is this really necessary?" Sam asked her husband of three years.

"Yes. I want to prove that I'm right."

"You're wrong."

"Just go do it."

"Fine," Sam said. "But I can't wait to see your face when you're wrong."

Sam headed into the bathroom and shut the door behind her.

"How long does it take to show?" Freddie called through the shut door as he lay on their bed.

"Box says five minutes."

Freddie looked at his watch. _This is going to be the longest five minutes ever,_ he told himself. But at last, the time elapsed.

"Sam?" Freddie called. "It's been five minutes. What's it say?"

There was no response from the bathroom.

"Sam?" Freddie repeated, knocking on the door.

The door opened slowly, and Sam came out without a word, holding the pregnancy test in one hand.

"So…?" Freddie asked anxiously.

Sam held up the test, revealing the small pink plus sign in the middle. "We're going to have a baby."

"Yes!" Freddie jumped up. "I was right!"

Sam smiled as Freddie wrapped his arms around her. "Yeah, you were. And for once, I don't think I mind."

AN- Sorry about the long wait. The next five chapters will be related to this one. I just love the idea of Sam and Freddie having a child together


	9. Chapter 9

_Excited_

"Oh my God!" Carly squealed, jumping out of her seat. "Sam, this is amazing!"

"Carly, you are aware that people can see you, right? This is a public place, you know."

The two friends were at the Groovy Smoothie. Sam had just told Carly that her and Freddie were going to have a baby.

"So? Sam, this is huge! I'm gonna be an aunt!" she exclaimed, ignoring the many stares she was getting.

"Honestly Carly, chill," Sam said, sipping her smoothie.

"How can you not be excited? You and Freddie are going to be parents?"

"I am excited, really excited. I just don't want to embarrass myself in front of all these people squealing like a maniac."

"Yeah, yeah," Carly laughed, sitting down. "So how far along are you?"

"I think about a month. Freddie and I are going to the doctors this afternoon so we'll find out the exact length then."

"You guys are so lucky," Carly said, sipping her drink. "I wish I could have a baby. But noooo, I'm twenty-four and single."

"Eh, you're hot," Sam said. "You'll find a guy."

"Thanks," she laughed. "Anyway, do you have any ideas for names?"

"Carly, I just found out I was pregnant last night."

"Ohh, I know, if it's a girl, you should name it Estina Denzella."

"Isn't that what that what Ginger Fox named her latest kid? How many kids does that women have know?"

"Eight I think, all from different marriages, but still isn't it a pretty name?"

"Yeah, if I want my kid to shoved in a trash can every day at school."

"I know, if it's a boy you can name it Claude Paul!"

"Oy," Sam sighed, as Carly continued to rattle off ridiculous baby names.


	10. Chapter 10

_Yellow _

"Careful!" Freddie said as Sam bent down to dip her paintbrush into the can of yellow paint.

"Calm down, will you Freddie?" said Sam, rolling her eyes.

"I just don't want you to hurt yourself. Or the baby."

"Relax," Sam laughed, rubbing a hand over her swelled abdomen. "We're fine. Just finish painting your side of the wall so we can go out for dinner. Mamma's starved."

"I can't believe you want to paint our kid's bedroom yellow of all colors," said Freddie.

"What's wrong with yellow? It's practically the only color that works for a boy or a girl."

"Well if you would just let the doctor tell you what it is…"

"Hey, if I'm gonna have to go through the actual child birth process, I'm gonna be the one to pick whether we know or not, you got it?"

"Okay, okay," Freddie surrendered. He had learnt not to pick fights with his wife right now. Pregnant Sam was actually more aggressive than normal Sam.

"So where are we gonna put the crib?" he asked, looking around the room. "Will it fit over by the window?"

"I dunno," Sam shrugged.  
"You mean you still haven't ordered it?"

"No, what's the big deal? It only takes a couple days to get here from the store."

"Well yeah, but considering your eight months pregnant I just figured we should have the room set up some time soon."

"I'll do it tomorrow," she promised. "Besides, I ordered the high chair."

"Right so, the baby will be able to eat, just not sleep."

"I want my kid to love eating, all right?"

"Of course," he laughed.


	11. Chapter 11

_Broke_

"Sam, I swear, I think you broke my hand," Freddie said, weakly flexing a few of his fingers. "It really hurts."

"That really hurts?" Sam said, narrowing her eyes, still trying to catch her breath. "Did you just shove a human being out of you?"

"Er, no."

"Then you don't know what 'hurts' really means," she said.

"He's all cleaned up now," the nurse said, walking over to the hospital bed where Sam was laying. "You can hold him."

Sam's face lit up as the nurse carefully transferred the tiny blue blanket into her arms, and saw for the first time, her newborn son.

Even though the birthing process was far from fun, it lasted over twenty-four hours, she still felt nothing but joy as the baby opened his eyes and stared at her.

"He's got your eyes," Sam commented to Freddie, looking into the little brown orbs of her child.

"Looks like he got your hair color," Freddie said, equally amazed by his new son.

"He's so small," Sam breathed quietly.

"Well he is a baby."

"I know, but I just never knew they were this small, I mean wow!"

"I'm just surprised he doesn't weigh more than seven pounds with everything you ate while you were pregnant," Freddie laughed.

"What should we name him?" Sam asked her husband.

"Good question," Freddie said thoughtfully. "Guess we probably should've been thinking about that before."

"Eh well, too late for that now."

"We should probably do it before Carly gets in here," Freddie suggested.

"Good idea. She's still attached to the name Blake…"

"Gross."

"Yeah. You know, I kind of like Jason…"

"Jason," Freddie repeated. "Jason. I like that. Simple, rolls of the tongue."

"What about his middle name?"

"Hmmm, what about Steven?"

"Jason Steven Benson," Sam said slowly. "You know, Fredifer, that actually has a nice ring to it."

"Are we sure? We're going with Jason Steven Benson?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded, looking down at the infant. "I love it. And I love him."

"Nice. We named our child in less than a minute."

"Good work," Sam smiled.

"Thank you. You too."

"You want to hold him?" Sam asked.

"Yes."

"Okay, be careful of his neck and head and-"

"I know, Sam," Freddie chuckled as he slowly lifted Jason from his mother's arms. "Hi little guy. I'm your daddy."

Jason blinked up at his father and grasped his finger in his tiny hand.

"Sam, look! He has my finger!"

"You're such a nub," she said, shaking her hand. Then she looked at her husband and said seriously, "you're going to be a good dad."

"You're going to be a good mom too."


	12. Chapter 12

_Jumping_

Sam and Freddie Benson were happily sleeping in their bed. Freddie had one arm draped over Sam, and Sam's hand rested on top of his. Their bedroom door suddenly creaked open, and their three-year old son quietly snuck into the room, still in his pajamas.

"Mamma! Daddy! Wake up!" He exclaimed happily, jumping up onto the bed. "Wake up! Wake up!"

The couple slowly opened their eyes and yawned as they sat up in their bed.

"Jason," Sam said, looking at the alarm clock on the nightstand. "It's not even seven yet. _And_ it's Saturday. Don't you want to sleep?"

"Sleep boring mommy."

Sam shook her head. "This is your fault, Freddie."

"My fault?" Freddie retorted, wiping the sleep out of his eyes. "How the heck is it my fault?"

"Oh, like he got this early-rising thing from me?"

"I want to play!" Jason said happily, climbing into his mother's lap. "And I'm hungry!"

"Okay baby," Sam said, rustling her son's blonde hair. "Daddy's going to go make us breakfast in bed."

"I am?"

"He is. Or else mommy's going to hide every single one of his _Galaxy Wars_ DVD's."

"Okay fine, fine, I'm going," Freddie muttered, throwing on his robe. "I'm going to take a wild guess here and say you want bacon?"

"My favorite!" Jason said excitedly.

"He is the exact copy of you," Freddie laughed to his wife. "Sometimes I wonder where my genes are."

"Daddy?" Jason asked. "Can I have my orange juice in my _Galaxy Wars_ cup?"

"There they are," Sam sighed.


	13. Chapter 13

_Voluntarily _

Sam would never, under any circumstance, voluntarily say 'I love you' to Freddie. Even after they had been dating a year, she had yet to say those three little words out loud.

Freddie, on the other hand, told Sam he loved her at least once a day. She would then smirk and simply reply; "yeah, you aren't so bad yourself, nub," and then proceed to punch him in the arm.

But today, Freddie was determined to change that.

"Hey," he greeted his blonde girlfriend as he walked across the hall to Carly's apartment.

"Hey," she said.

"So Sam," he said, sitting down next to her. "Guess what I bought online? Two tickets to see the MMA fight that's coming to Seattle next weekend."

"Seriously? I thought it was sold out?"

"It is. I had to buy them from this guy on aBay for almost a hundred bucks."

"Awesome! It's supposed to be the best fight of the year! Joe Hanley and Dan Respeto are going to-"

"Hold on," Freddie interrupted her. "We go under one condition."

Sam narrowed her eyes. "What?"

"You have to say you love me."

"You've got to be kidding me."

"Nope. We've been dating for over a year now, and you've never said it."

"Maybe because I'm not as big a nub as you," she spat back.

"Come on, Sam, just say it. Then we can go to the fight next weekend."

"I'm not saying it."

"Then we won't go to the fight."

"Give me the tickets, Benson."

"After you say it, Puckett."

Sam frowned, and crossed her arms. "Fine. I love you. Are you happy now?"

"Yes," he said, feeling very satisfied.

"Now where are the tickets?"

"I left them by my computer. I'll be right back." He got up, gave Sam a quick kiss and headed back across the hall.

Once the door closed, Sam smiled. "Yeah, I love you, nub. I always have."


	14. Chapter 14

_Appearance_

Sam was never one to care too much about her appearance. Unlike Carly, who spent a good hour getting ready in the mornings, Sam was able to be ready in less than five minutes. She did, however, want to look nice at times. When she went on her first date with Freddie, she stressed about what she should wear for hours.

"What about this?" Carly asked her best friend, holding up the twentieth outfit.

"It's too sparkly," Sam sighed, falling back on Carly's bed. "Face it; this is hopeless. I'm just going to call Freddie and cancel the date."

"Oh no you're not," Carly said. "I've waited for this moment for years. I'm not going to let you blow it."

"Years?"

"What about this?" Carly asked, holding up a red peasant blouse and kilted jean skirt. "Plus, I have the perfect shoes to match it."

"It actually looks good," Sam approved.

"Good, hurry and up and change. Freddie's going to be here in twenty minutes and I still have to do your hair!"

…

"Wow," Freddie said as he watched Sam descend the stairs. "You look-wow."

"Thanks," she replied, trying hard not to blush. "Now let's go; I'm starved."

"Have fun!" Carly called as they left the apartment.

"You really do look good," Freddie told Sam as they headed to the lobby. "But then again; you always do."

"Such a nub," Sam muttered. But still, her heart skipped a beat.


	15. Chapter 15

_Quantum_

"I can't believe the stupid school put me in quantum physics," Sam complained loudly, lying on the Shay's couch. "Don't these people see my grades? Obviously I'm going to fail this class!"

"Then switch out if you really don't want to take it," Carly suggested.

"I can't. The only class with an opening is band."

"You know how to play the trombone."

"Yeah, and I hated even more than I hate quantum physics."

"Well, I'm sure it won't be that bad. Besides, Freddie's in your class. He'll help you."

"What will I do?" Freddie asked, coming down from the iCarly studio.

"Help Sam in quantum physics."

"What? Why'd you take that class?"

"I didn't pick it. The stupid school stuck me in it!"

"Fine, I'll help you. I guess it's going to be the only way you'll pass the class."

"Excuse me? Are you implying that I'm dumb?"

"Um-"

"Fine, let's make a bet. I bet you I can get at least a C on our first test without your help. You in?"

"Sure, this is one bet I can finally win."

….

"Alright class, I'm passing back your tests now," said Mr. Geller, the quantum physics teacher at Ridgeway. "I must say, I was rather disappointed with the scores."

"Scared?" Freddie asked Sam, grinning as he prepared to win his first bet against her in years.

"You wish."

"Here you go, Mr. Benson. Better luck next time." Mr. Geller slid Freddie's paper onto his desk, a large C on top.

"Aw man. There goes my grade-point average."

"Looks like someone isn't the physics genius he thought he was," Sam smirked.

"If _I _got a C, I can't even imagine what you got."

"Congratulations, Ms. Puckett," Mr. Geller said, handing Sam back her test. "Looks like you have quite the knack for physics."

"You got an A?" Freddie exclaimed.

"I think this would be the part where I win the bet."

"No way, you must've cheated."

"How? We sit right next to Mr. Geller's desk!"

"But-but you can't have gotten a better grade than me. I-I-"

"I win," Sam said happily. "Meet me at Carly's after school. I have something in store for you."

"Oh chiz."


	16. Chapter 16

_Something_

Sam certainly was something.

She was crazy.

She was rude.

She was aggressive.

She was lazy.

She was a demon.

But she was also sweet.

And kind.

And funny.

And smart.

She was beautiful.

And as her boyfriend, Freddie got the best of both Sam's.

He got the Sam who beat him up until he gave her his last fat cake. Then he got the Sam who would talk to him for hours on the phone, making him feel happier than he's ever felt.

He got the Sam who could eat an entire ham in less than fifteen minutes. Then he got the Sam who played guitar and wrote amazing songs for only him.

He got the Sam who slept through every class and then for three hours after school. Then he got the Sam who spent a week reading a computer book so they could talk about processors together.

He got the Sam who screamed louder than a siren, and the Sam who kissed like an angel.

He got the Sam who tried to bathe herself in gravy, and the Sam who made his heart beat like mad whenever her held her hand.

He got the Sam who could tackle a truck driver, and the Sam that admitted to only him that she was secretly afraid of the dark.

And no matter what Sam he would happen to get on any day, he loved her. And no matter what Sam she decided to be, Sam loved Freddie.


	17. Chapter 17

_Country_

"Sam?" Freddie said to the blonde sitting next to him.

No answer.

"Sam?" he repeated again.

Still nothing.

"Sam!"

"What?" Sam said finally, pulling one earbud out of her ear.

"I asked you what time Carly and Spencer were supposed to be back from dinner with their granddad?"

"How am I supposed to know?"

Freddie sighed. "I don't know Sam. Maybe because she told you before she left?"

"Well you were here, you heard her."

"No I didn't. I was busy getting Spencer's jacket out of the toilet!"

"Well I didn't pay attention."

"Surprise surprise," he said rolling his eyes.

"Whatever," Sam snapped, about to place her earbud back in.

"Oh no," Freddie said, snatching it up from her. "If I'm going to be sitting here I need to be doing something. Let me listen too."

"No, it's my pear pod. Watch T.V. you nub."

"Spencer forgot the pay the cable bill. Again. It won't be back for at least another day."

"Then listen to _your_ pear pod."

"I can't. Gibby ran over it with his bike."

"Then go back to your apartment."

"Believe me, I would, but my mom's at work and I can't get in because SOMEONE threw my key out the window! Now let me listen."

"Fine," Sam sighed in defeat. "Anything to make you shut up."

"Thank you," Freddie said satisfied, placing the earbud into his ear.

He had expected Sam's pear pod to be filled with inappropriate, loud, weird songs that were sung by dudes who looked like they needed to be locked up in the Seattle Zoo. But instead, he heard something entirely different.

"Is this country music?" he asked.

"You've got a problem with it?"

"No," he said. "It's just I never pictured you listening to it. It seems a bit…tame for you."

"Yeah well, I happen to like it. It's better than whatever you listen to."

"This is actually pretty good," Freddie said approvingly. "I might have to start listening to country myself. You have any CD's I can borrow?"

Sam looked at him. "You want to listen to country?"

"Yeah, I think I'd really like it. So can I borrow some CD's?"

Sam shrugged. "I guess." Then gave a small smile when he wasn't looking.

Two weeks later, Freddie Benson and Sam Puckett went to a huge country music festival.

Together.

As their first date.


	18. Chapter 18

_Explanation_

Sam couldn't give an explanation for why she was in love with Freddie.

She really couldn't.

He was a total nerd. His room was plastered with _Galaxy Wars_ posters, and he could scarcely hold a conversation without bringing up some sort of technological reference.

He was total mommy's boy. He spent at least one day a week doing some sort of craft project with her just so she wouldn't miss her Freddikins too much.

He didn't dress well; far too much strips.

He flaunted over Carly…though not so much anymore.

He was weak…wait, no. He was getting harder and harder to beat in arm wrestling.

He was rude…no, that wasn't true either. He was always polite, even to her, who pulled prank after prank on him.

He was ugly…ha! Yeah right, she was finding in increasingly difficult to stop from staring at his face.

He didn't know how to treat a girl…actually, he was probably the one gentleman she knew.

He didn't kiss well? Biggest lie in the book. After that fire escape kiss, even though she had nothing to compare it to, she knew she had just kissed an exceptional kisser.

No. Sam had no idea why she was in love with Freddie Benson.


	19. Chapter 19

_Conclusion_

Carly had come to conclusion back when Sam and Freddie first started dating that they would be a strange couple.

She was wrong though; they weren't strange.

They were completely insane.

Even though they had been dating for months, they still acted like they always had.

Sam would prank Freddie. Freddie would call her a demon.

Sam would call him a nub. Freddie would roll his eyes as she shoved half a ham into her mouth.

They would argue about the dumbest things. Continually.

One time, she remembered, they sat on her couch and argued for ten hours straight about the proper way to eat Jell-o.

They argued about which apples tasted the best: red or green; about whether the season was called autumn or fall; about how many marshmallows were appropriate to put in one's hot chocolate.

The only thing different now was that once the argument had finally subsided, they two would wind up kissing.

"Hey, Sam?" Carly asked her best friend as the two sat in her room. "Why do you and Freddie keep fighting even though you're dating?"

"What do you mean? We don't fight."

"Um," Carly said, frowning. "Yes, you do. A lot."

Sam laughed. "That's not fighting, Carly. That's arguing."

"What's the difference?"

"Well, when you fight with a person, you literally hate them. You don't want to see them. When you argue with someone all you do is try to prove them wrong."

"I'm still lost."

"When me and Freddie argue," Sam sighed. "We're just having fun. That's kind of how we show affection. It's not like when Wendy and her boyfriend fought that one time. Those two actually hated the other, and wound up breaking up. Freddie and me wouldn't break up over an argument about whether Girly Cow could beat NugNug in a boxing match."

"Wait a minute," Carly said slowly. "So you and Freddie have never had one real fight?"

"Nope."

"Not one?"

"Not one."

"Wow," Carly said after much thought. "You guys really are a good couple."

"Well, that's because I'm in it."


	20. Chapter 20

_Super_

"I'm bored," Sam whined, lying down on the Shay's couch.

Freddie didn't respond, and kept watching the T.V.

"Yo, Benson. I said I was bored!"

"Shhh, Sam, I'm watching this."

"Okay, you've got to be kidding me," Sam laughed, looking at the screen. "This is too nerdy, even for you."

Freddie was watching a movie about a superhero that was currently battling his archenemy over a pit of boiling lava.

"What? This is Fusion Man! He's got all sorts of cool superpowers and he saves the world…okay, fine, it's nerdy."

"Eh, the villain seems alright," Sam shrugged, sitting up. "At least he's using his powers to try to take over the world and stuff. I mean, what's the point of being able to fly if you're just going to try to save everyone."

Freddie rolled his eyes. "What, is that what you would do if you had super powers? Try to take over the world?"

"Not right away," she explained, as if she had been thinking about this for a long time. "First I would get a nice following so I would have unlimited support; you know, help out the president, save a tree here and there, that sort of chiz. But then, when everyone least expected it, they would have to bow down to me."

"Well thank God you don't have powers then," Freddie laughed. "But you know you wouldn't be a super villain, Sam."

"Yes I would."

"Nope. You're not that bad. You're mean, sure, but you wouldn't actually hurt anyone."

She punched him in the arm. "Oh, wouldn't I?"

"You know what I mean."

"So you think I would be a superhero?"

"Actually, I planned on making you my sidekick."

"What? First of all, since when do you have powers?"

"If you get to imagine yourself with powers than so do I."

"The only power you would have would be the power to bore everyone to death with your tech talk."

"Nah, I'm thinking I could handle super strength pretty well."

"Pfft. Please. I can still beat you in arm-wrestling, Benson."

"Yeah, but it takes you longer now."

"Point is I can still beat you, which means that _you_ would be _my_ sidekick."

"Yeah, right," Freddie scoffed. "Besides, if I _did_ have super strength, then I could beat you."

"I'll believe that when I see it."

"Fine, when we're both hit by some sort of radioactive comet, we'll arm-wrestle and see who wins. Loser has to be the others sidekick, deal?"

"Deal." And they shook on it.

When they both tried to reasonably explain this bet to Carly when she got home, she simply shook her head.

"Really, is this what you two do when I'm gone?"


	21. Chapter 21

_Rewrite_

"Holy chiz, this is hard!" Sam exclaimed, crumpling up her twelfth piece of paper and throwing it in the trashcan.

"How many times have you rewritten them?" Carly asked, smiling as her best friend pulled out a clean sheet of paper.

"Too many! The nub had better be having as much trouble with this as I am!"

"Trust me, he is," Carly laughed. "But I guess writing your own wedding vows isn't easy."

Sam groaned. Of course Freddie had to talk her into writing her own vows for their wedding.

"This wedding had better be pretty stinkin' great," Sam mumbled.

….

When the day of Sam Puckett and Freddie Benson's wedding finally arrived, Sam nervously read over her vows.

"Sam, we're almost ready," Carly told her, coming in with Spencer, who would be giving her away.

"Okay," Sam said, feeling absolute nervousness as she stood up, about to walk down the aisle to Freddie.

"You look great," Spencer told her.

"Thanks," Sam smiled. "Now come on. Mama's ready to get married."

…

Sam and Freddie both stood at the alter, ready to recite their vows to one another. Sam was going to go first.

"Freddie," she said. "If anyone had told me ten years ago that I would be marrying you, I would've punched them in the face. But here we are, minutes away from being husband and wife. You're the only man on this planet that I would ever let call me 'Sammy', or kiss me, or occasionally let beat me at arm wrestling. And even though I don't exactly make it obvious all the time, I really do love you. Whenever I see you, I may call you 'nub', but inside, my heart still skips a beat."

Freddie grinned, and then cleared his throat. "Sam," he began. "You are by far, the most insane girl I've ever met. You eat double your weight in meat, you scare the elderly for fun, and you find joy in egging our old teachers' homes. But that's what I love about you. You're not like the other girls, who try only to be beautiful on the outside. Inside and out, you outshine every one. The idea of us spending the rest of our lives together makes me feel so elated; I can't think of anything better. I love you, Sam. I will always love you."

Sam tried to hide her red cheeks and the huge smile that was creeping over her face.

After the minister pronounced the two husband and wife, they shared a passionate kiss. "Nice vows," Freddie whispered when the two finally pulled away.

"You two," she whispered back.


	22. Chapter 22

_Calculator_

"Alright, Sam!" Freddie said loudly, barging into the Shay's apartment.

"What's got you're pants in a knot, Benson?" Sam asked in a board voice, not even looking up from the bowl of ravioli she was devouring.

"You borrowed my calculator last week, and now it's ruined! What did you do to it?"

"Calm down, I didn't do anything to it."

"Yes you did! It's giving me all the wrong answers! Look, when I type in 1+1, it gives 56.93943! And if I take the square root of 25, it gives me negative pi!"

"It worked fine when I used it," she shrugged simply. "Must've been you."

"It-what? No!" he exclaimed, frustrated. "Sam, this isn't funny! I've got my big math test tomorrow, and I need my calculator! I can't believe I let you borrow it, you're so irresponsible!"

"Hey, you'd better watch it, Freddison, or I'm going to take that calculator and smash it over your stupid head! Now listen to my words: I. Didn't. Break. Your. Calculator!"

"You know what, Sam, you're so-so ahh! I can't even think of an adjective, that's how mad I am! You're going to go to the store right now to buy me a new-"

"What's with all the yelling?" Spencer yawned, coming out of his room in this duck pajamas. "And why are you even here? Carly's still spending the weekend in Yakama."

"Sam mutilated my calculator somehow," Freddie said, still frowning angrily at the blonde on the couch.

"I did not!"

"Wait, that's your calculator?" Spencer asked. "I thought it was Carly's. I spilled Wahoo Punch on it yesterday when I was figuring out how much to sell my sculpture for. Sorry."

"You- I- huh?" Freddie stuttered, flabbergasted.

"I was going to go out today and buy another one," Spencer continued. "Just as soon as I got dressed. Sorry, about it."

"Um, that's okay," Freddie said.

"Well, I'm going to go eat my cereal in my bath," Spencer said, grabbing a jug of milk and a box of Marshmallow Surprise. "Later!"

Sam turned to Freddie, a look of absolute satisfaction etched on her face. "Well, well, well. Looks like _somebody_ owes _somebody_ an apology, doesn't he?"

"Sorry," Freddie muttered under his breath.

"What's that? I didn't hear you."

"Fine," he sighed. "I'm sorry I accused you of breaking my calculator, Sam."

"Good," she grinned.

Freddie turned to leave.

"Wait, where do you think you're going?"

"To go home. The new Galaxy Wars Trailer is supposed to come on in ten minutes."

"You really think Mama's gonna forgive you that easily?"

"Sam," Freddie groaned.

"Come along," Sam said, jumping up. "Let's see how much I can get you to spend at the Groovy Smoothie."

Freddie sighed. He really should've known better than to accuse Sam Puckett.


	23. Chapter 23

_Misprint_

"Okay, now just keep your hands out in front of you," Sam instructed Freddie.

"This better not be another trick to hit me," Freddie warned the blonde girl as he put his hands out in front of him as she said.

"Don't be so paranoid, Fredifer. Okay, when I say three, see how long you can keep your hands perfectly still without moving them."

"Okay, but it seems pretty easy," Freddie said reluctantly.

"No, it's actually really hard. Not many people can do it past ten seconds. Alright, one, two, THREE!"

Upon that word, Sam quickly, slapped Freddie's palms hard.

"OW! Sam! You promised!" Freddie exclaimed, rubbing his red hands together.

"Eh, I promise a lot of things," Sam shrugged, smiling, as she proceeded to eat the Fat Cake that had been on Freddie's plate.

"You know, I can here you guys from down the hall," Carly said, as she opened the apartment door and walked into the room.

"Where have you been?" Sam asked.

"I ran into Kathy McAdams at the Groovy Smoothie, you know the editor of the school paper," Carly replied. "Anyway, you remember how she wrote that article about iCarly in the student spotlight section?"

"Oh yeah," Freddie nodded, still in obvious pain.

"Well, she gave me an early copy," Carly said, pulling out a paper from her bag.

"Is it any good?" Sam asked.

"I don't know. I didn't read it yet," Carly said. She sat down on the couch, and opened the paper up to the story. She got maybe thirty seconds into it, when suddenly she let out a snicker.

"What?" Freddie asked, looking over her shoulder.

"Oh, nothing," Carly said, smiling.

"Come on, Shay, what is it?" Sam demanded, grabbing the paper from her best friend. Freddie stood next to her as she read aloud. "Three students here at Ridgeway have achieved fame in a unique way, having created their very own web show. The stars of the show, Carly Shay, Sam-What!"

"No way! This can't be put out!" Freddie cried.

"It's not that big of a deal, guys," Carly told her two best friends, who both had expressions of shock on their faces. "It's just a little misprint." She took the paper from Sam and continued reading. "The stars of the show, Carly Shay, Sam Benson and Freddie Puckett began the show about three years ago, after accidentally uploading videos of themselves making fun of a certain teacher on SplashFace and-"

"Ugh, I can't listen to this anymore," Sam interrupted. "I've got to find Kathy and beat her up. I'm out of here."

"Don't do anything illegal, Sam!" Carly called after her friend.

Sam slammed the door behind her, and stormed down the stairs. Once the initial anger that she had felt faded, though, she couldn't help but smile. For some reason, being called Sam Benson didn't disgust her all too much…


	24. Chapter 24

_Flexible_

"Right foot blue," Freddie said to Carly and Sam, who were both spread out in ridiculous positions on a _Twister _mat.

"You've got to be kidding me," Carly mumbled, as she tried to stretch her leg across the mat to the blue dot. In the process though, she let out a yelp, and fell down.

"Yes! Mama wins again!" Sam exclaimed, moving her leg to the blue dot with ease. "I am the champion!"

"That's what, fifteen games in a row," Freddie commented.

"Yes, because she's crazy flexible," Carly pointed out, picking herself up. "Honestly, what kind of person can bend their arm like that?"

"It's called skill, Carlotta."

"I think you and Freddie should play," Carly said, taking the spinner from Freddie.

"No thank you," Freddie said. "I'd prefer not to break my arm today."

"Aw, come on, afraid your girlfriend's going to beat you?" Carly teased playfully.

"Of course she's going to win," Freddie said "It's been scientifically proven that girls are much more flexible than boys are-"

"Just play, Benson," Sam said. "The sooner we start, the sooner you get the humiliation over with."

"Fine," Freddie sighed. "But you're explaining any broken bones to my mom."

"Just go," Carly laughed, spinning the spinner. "Okay, right hand green."

Sam and Freddie each placed one hand on a green dot.

"Left foot red," Carly told them.

"You ready to quit yet, Fredington?" Sam asked, moving her right foot to the dot.

"I can feel my spine snapping," Freddie winced.

"Eh, man up."

"Guys, no fighting during _Twister_," Carly said to her bickering friends. "Okay, left hand yellow."

"And I'm down," Freddie said as his legs gave out while sliding his hand over to the yellow dot.

"And my reign continues," Sam smiled.

"That game is impossible," Freddie said, frowning as Carly began putting it back in its box.

"What? No way, it's the best!" Sam argued.

"I will say though, it did have its perks."

"Like?"

"Well," Freddie grinned. "It was kind of fun being that close to you."

"How lame," Sam said, shaking her head, smiling. "How, stupidly, pathetically lame, nub."


	25. Chapter 25

_Weekly _

Every Monday, Sam and Freddie had their weekly iCarly day. This wasn't the day they filmed the show; it was the day that the two filmed little clips for the site while Carly was at her student government meetings.

"Let's do a random debate again," Sam said, picking the lock to get into the Shay's apartment.

"We did that two weeks ago," Freddie reminded her. "We could always call Nevel and trick him into reading another poem."

"According to his page, he's away at some porcupine convention," Sam said.

"I'll go and see which bit's been getting the most views lately," Freddie decided. "And we'll just do another clip for that one, okay?"

"Whatever floats your boat, Frederk," Sam shrugged, grabbing a can of soda from the fridge. She walked over to stand by Freddie as he logged into the site.

"Okay, now let me just see… It looks like the Jitters got the most views."

"Really? People liked that them most?"

"Yeah. Let me pull up the comments…"

"Do you want to move a little faster there, Benson?"

"I can only click so fast! Here we go…Okay, RappySnappy said 'this is so hilarious, funniest thing on iCarly, and that's saying something."

"Pietime wrote: 'That Gibby sure does look good in a dress," Sam read. "Well, clearly this guy is delusional."

"Purplepixie wrote- Um, never mind, next comment," Freddie said quickly, scrolling down before Sam got a chance to read it.

"Wait, what did it say?" Sam demanded.

"Nothing, just something stupid."

"Well, I'm used to stupid; I hang out with you. Now scroll back up!"

"Sam, you really don't want to- Ow!"

Sam had grabbed his arm and yanked him off his seat. She sat down and scrolled back up to the comment.

"Don't you try to hide things from Mama," she said, finding the comment. "Okay, Purplepixie wrote 'I wonder if that is how Sam and Freddie will act when they really do become a married couple-oh."

"I warned you," Freddie said, getting to his feet.

"Can't you send this chick a virus or something? How dare she suggest that I'd marry something like you?"

"Like being married to you would be a real treat," Freddie mumbled, rolling his eyes.

"Hey, I'd be a blast to be married to."

"Well so would I!"

"Yeah, right," Sam smirked. "I pity the girl that winds up being stuck with you."

"And I feel real bad for whoever has to spend his life with you," Freddie retaliated.

"My husband would be a whole lot happier than your wife would be," Sam snapped.

"Fine. I guess we'll see when we both get married."

"Fine. I guess we will."

….

_Eight Years Later_

"So remember that bet we made eight years ago," Freddie said to Sam. "About whose spouse would be happier with them?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded.

"Well, I guess I loose," Freddie grinned. "Because your husband is pretty darn happy with you."

"Eh," Sam said. "I'm not so sure. Your wife is pretty happy with you."

And they both leaned in and kissed the other.


	26. Chapter 26

_Hobby_

Freddie walked into the Shay's apartment, laptop in hand, ready to do another iCarly.

"Hey," he greeted Carly, who was helping Gibby get into his Dr. Lobster costume.

"Hi," she replied, trying to fit Gibby's hand into the claw. "Gibby! Just ball your fist up or something!"

"What do you think I'm trying to do?" the boy exclaimed.

"Where's Sam?" Freddie asked, trying not to laugh at the scene.

"I think she went out onto the fire escape," Carly told him. "Can you go get her? The show starts in ten minutes."

"Sure thing," he nodded, setting his laptop down. He headed out to the fire escape.

"Sam," he called once he arrived. He spotted the blonde girl leaning back in an old patio chair. She had a notebook in one hand, and sitting by the chair, much to Freddie's surprise, was a guitar.

"What, Fredpops?" she said, quickly closing her notebook.

"Um, Carly said the show is about to start. Is that a guitar?"

Sam looked down at her precious guitar, cursing herself for not hiding it when she heard someone coming up. "Observant there, aren't you, nub?" she snapped coldly.

"I didn't know you play guitar," Freddie said, walking further out onto the fire escape.

"Who says I play it?"

"You just carry a guitar out here to look at?"

"Fine, yes, I can play guitar. I, unlike you, actually do happen to have a measurable amount of talent."

"What's in there," he asked, ignoring Sam's insult and instead indicated to her notebook, which she had tried to conceal, unsuccessfully, beneath her chair.

"None of your business," she said, making a grab for the notebook, but Freddie was faster.

"You open that, Benson, and you'll be falling off this fire escape in a second," Sam warned him, jumping up.

"It says 'songs and junk'," Freddie read off the closed cover. "You write your own music?"

"You really want to go off this fire escape, don't you?"

"What's wrong with playing guitar and writing music?" Freddie asked, handing her back the notebook.

"It's just something I like to do!" she exclaimed, exasperated. "It's a hobby, you know. You have that dorky Galaxy Wars collection, Carly has that weird ukulele thing, and I have my music, okay?"

"Okay," Freddie said. "So can I hear you play something?"

Sam glared at him. "What?"

"Can I hear you play something?" he repeated.

"Will you drop it if I do?"

"Yes."

"Fine," she conceded, picking up her guitar. "But this is the ONLY time I'm ever going to do this for you."

She played a few cords for Freddie. It was the first verse of the song she was working on.

"There," she said after about a minute. "I played. Happy?"

"That was actually really good," Freddie said, impressed. "Who would've thought someone who guzzles ham down in under a minute and beats up truck drivers on a regular basis would be so gifted with music."

"Remember, you said you'd drop it," Sam said, putting her guitar back down. "So do that. Come on, let's go do iCarly before Carly flips out on us."

"So," Freddie said as the two made their way back down to the apartment. "What else don't I know about you?"

"That's for me to know and you to never find out," she replied, grinning.


	27. Chapter 27

_Shine_

Freddie loved Sam's hair. He loved to play with it; though he had to make sure that Sam had some sort of meat product in her hand or she'd smack him. He loved the way it smelled, like strawberries and daisy. He loved the way it felt, soft and springy in his hand. But most of all, he loved the way it shined. Carly's hair shined as well, but that was because, as she told him, she used a special conditioner she bought at her hair salon. Sam's hair shined naturally, without any help. Especially when they went outside into the sun. He had never seen hair shine like that. Even when he had seen Melanie and Sam side by side at the beach one day when Melanie came to visit (that had been a bit of a shock to him, seeing as Sam had told him that she wasn't real), he noticed that Melanie's hair didn't shine nearly as much as Sam's. That was one of the ways he told them apart. Carly thought he was crazy, for she couldn't see any difference in the twins' hair. But to Freddie it was clear. There were many things that made Sam Puckett beautiful in his mind, but her hair would always stand out to him.


	28. Chapter 28

_Fog_

"We probably made a wrong turn somewhere," Freddie said, slowly driving his car through the thick fog. "I don't see that restaurant Carly was talking about anywhere."

"Which is why I should've driven," Sam said, exasperated. "You're too much of a nub to know how to get anywhere."

"It's not my fault! This stupid fog is impossible to see through!"

"Whatever," she snapped. "All I know is that I'm starving and I don't see anything around to eat for miles. Well, except you, that is."

"Look, I'll just pull over and call Carly," Freddie decided. "But you know, we wouldn't be in this situation if _somebody_ didn't spill gravy all over my GPS last weekend!"

"Well if you didn't drive so badly I wouldn't have-"

"Ah!" Freddie cried in frustration, looking at her pear phone. "No service. Great."

"Fantastic," Sam sighed. "Now all we need is for our car to-"

As if planned, Freddie's car gave a loud wail, and the engine stopped.

"You've got to be kidding me," Freddie exclaimed, unbuckling his seatbelt to go look under the hood.

"You know," Sam said, also walking over to the hood of the car. "This happens in a lot of horror movies. Foggy day, no phone service, abandoned road, car breaks down. Pretty soon a stranger will come and offer to give us a ride, but will wind up slashing our throats."

"Thanks for that," Freddie said, rolling his eyes, but feeling a tiny bit frightened at the same time. He lifted up the hood.

"Do you even know the first thing about a car engine?"

"I'm pretty sure it's not supposed to look like this," he said. "Looks like it overheated or something."

"Wow, count on Freddie's car to fail us."

"Hey, _you're_ the one that drove it yesterday."

"That was Carly you idiot!"

"I-oh. Well, look; we might as well try to find a phone. Come on, let's walk up the road and see what's there."

"Walk? Benson, all I can say is you better buy me a steak dinner when we get back to civilization."

The two walked down the road, hoping to see a store or at least another car, but they found none.

"We've been walking for forever!" Sam moaned.

"Sam, it's been ten minutes."

"Well, ten minutes with you seems like forever."

The two stopped. The road had ended, and they were standing at the edge of a low, rocky hillside, that was over looking a beach. And a short ways up the beach, there was a-

"A lifeguard station!" Freddie said happily, spotting the small building. "Yes! We're saved!"

"Maybe they have Fat Cakes!" Sam said hopefully. They began to climb down the rocks to get to the beach. About halfway down, though, Sam's shoe got caught between two rocks, and she slipped.

"Are you okay?" Freddie asked, turning to see the blonde on the ground, her hand holding her ankle in pain.

"No! I think I broke it," she said. Freddie could tell she was trying not to cry.

"You're knee's bleeding," Freddie said. He took off his jacket and wiped off some of the blood. Then he stood up and extended a hand to Sam. "Come on," he said. "Let me help you up, and then I'll carry you on my back to the lifeguard station."

Sam must've been in some real pain, because she didn't even make any snide remark about him being to wimpy and dorky to carry her. She simply nodded and took Freddie's hand. He eased her up, and then gingerly lifted her onto his back. Thankfully there wasn't much further to travel down the rocks. Freddie managed to get him and Sam to the lifeguard station in about ten minutes.

There were two lifeguard's on duty. One helped Sam into a chair and got both teens some water while the other went to go radio for a tow truck for the car and an ambulance for Sam, so she could get her ankle fixed up.

"Mighty lucky your friend was there," the lifeguard said to Sam as he placed a bag of ice on her swollen ankle. "Could've been hours before anybody saw you."

"Yeah, real lucky," Sam said. "Do you have anything to eat in this place?"

"Let me go check."

Once the two were alone, Sam looked over at Freddie, who had a smug grin on his face.

"Looks like somebody owes somebody a thank you."

"You owe me that steak dinner for making me walk and break my ankle," Sam pointed out. Freddie rolled his eyes.

"But thanks," she said, showing a small smile. "For about ten minutes of your life, I guess you weren't _that_ big of a nub."


	29. Chapter 29

_Badge_

"So my mom told me that it was infected, but it didn't look infected, you know, with all the pus and stuff, so I squeezed it, and she threw her soda at me!" Sam told Carly as the two girls placed books in their lockers at Ridgeway High. "Can you believe that?"

"Um, no," Carly said. "I really can't."

"Morning ladies," Freddie said, walking over to the girls. He had a gold badge on his chest.

"What is _that_?" Sam asked, poking his chest. "Did they finally name you Head Nub?"

"No," he snapped. "This, happens to be my SWS badge."

"SWS?" Carly repeated.

"Students Watching Students. It's this new program that Principal Franklin wants to try out. Basically, he picks a few students that he thinks are really honorable and has them look over the student body."

"So, basically you're a snitch," Sam stated. "Wow, just when I thought the social bar couldn't go any lower."

"Honorable students? Aren't I an honorable student?" Carly said, frowning.

"For your information," Freddie said to Sam. "This badge is finally going to get me some respect around here."

"No, it's going to get you stuffed in a trashcan."

"Yeah, I've got to agree with Sam on this one," Carly said. "Students are going to be too thrilled about one of their own telling everything they do to the principal. Not that it's any less of an honor," she quickly added. "I'm really happy you got picked, but still..."

"You'll both see," Freddie said, crossing his arms. "By the end of the day, I'll have climbed the social totem all the way to the top."

_End of the Day_

Sam headed to her favorite vending machine after school (it always screwed up and gave her two packages of Fat Cakes). She was just about to put her dollar into the machine when she heard Freddie's voice. "Um, a little help here?"

She turned around. At first, she thought she was hearing things, but then she saw Freddie, sitting, stuck in a garbage can.

"Wow," she said, her voice filled with laughter as she walked over to him. "Look what we have here. A disposable dork."

"Ha, ha. Just help me up, will you?"

"Nah, think I'll savor this moment a little longer. So, is this the high end of the totem pole you were talking about?"

"Sam! Come on, there's something very slimy seeping through my jacket!"

"First let me here you say I was right about the badge."

"No!"

"Fine," she said. She started to walk away.

"Wait! Okay, whatever, you were right. Now get me out of here!"

"That's what Mama loves to here," she grinned. She took hold of Freddie's hands and heaved him out of the trashcan.

"Thanks," Freddie panted. "Well, you'll be happy to know that I'm done being a part of SWS. I'll tell Franklin tomorrow."

"Who's the wonderful person that put you in there in the first place?" Sam asked, still smiling.

"The huge football player Rob Sharp. I told him that it was against school policy to practice throwing his football by the staircase and he, well, you know the rest."

"So where's your badge?"

"You don't want to know," Freddie said, and Sam burst out laughing. "Man, I've got to give Sharp a medal!"

"Of course you do," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

_Next Day_

"Hey," Freddie greeted Carly.

"Hi," she said. "Look, Sam told me about you getting stuffed in a trashcan. I feel really bad."

"Eh, it's no big deal. Where's Sam?"

"She said something about going to see Rob Sharp."

"Sure she's giving him a high five," Freddie said.

"Hey, hey," Sam said, walking around the corner, chewing a piece of bacon.

"Well, we'd better get to class," Carly said.

"I have to grab my books from my locker, you two go ahead," Freddie said.

The girls nodded, and headed towards their class.

As Freddie headed towards his locker, though, he passed Rob Sharp. He was about to turn and run in the other direction, but before he did, he caught a closer glance at the giant boy. He had a black eye and was walking with a limp.

"It was that Sam Puckett!" he said to one of football friends. "She's crazy strong!"

Freddie grinned as Rob passed. Maybe that blonde-headed demon wasn't so bad…


	30. Chapter 30

_Telephone_

Every night, without fail, right before he turned on his T.V. to the Sci-Fi channel, Freddie called Sam on the telephone.

This was an unspoken tradition between the two.

Freddie initiated the call.

Sam told him that it had better be good because she was just sitting down to her eighth Fat Cake of the day.

Freddie would tell her that those things were filled with artificial colors and flavors, and would probably clog her arteries.

Sam would tell him the shut his mouth before she wired it shut herself.

Freddie would call her a demon, which would lead Sam to call him a nub.

Freddie would then laugh smugly and say that he was her nub, though.

Sam would say that he'd better believe it.

Freddie would tell Sam that he loved her.

Sam would pretend to gag and call him an over-emotional wreck.

Freddie would not even bat and eye, and would proceed to tell her that he couldn't wait for their date that weekend.

Sam would tell him it better be a place that had meats up to her standard.

Freddie would then tell her that eating too much meat would give her high cholesterol when she was older.

Sam would tell him that she was going to punch him so hard his grandpa would feel it.

Freddie would then hear his mom yell at him to hang up before the phone gave him ear sores.

Sam would laugh and call his mom a lunatic.

Freddie would silently agree, and told Sam good night, and that he loved her.

Sam would tell him not to bother her again.

Freddie would roll his eyes as they both hung up.

Sam, only after the line was dead, would mutter that she loved him too, and then return to her Fat Cake.


	31. Chapter 31

_Decrease_

"This. Cannot. Be. Happening." Sam said in horror, sitting on the Shay's couch. Carly and Freddie were on either side of her, trying to calm her down.

"Sam, is it really that horrible?" Carly tried to reason with her best friend. "So the Fat Cake company decided to decrease the amount of chocolate crème in the cake, is it really worth getting worked up over?"

"Um, yes!" Sam exclaimed. "The Fat Cake had the perfect balance of chocolate crème, coconut flakes, marshmallow fluff and strawberry sprinkles. Now the whole balance is thrown off and the Fat Cake will never be the same!"

"Are you crying?" Freddie asked, slightly amused.

"This is serious!" Sam said, punching him in the arm, which took the grin right off his face. "Fat Cakes were the only things in the world I truly cared about!"

"Thanks," Freddie said to his girlfriend. "Love you too."

"Why don't you just try the new kind," Carly suggested. "I'm sure they taste just as good as the original."

"I will not put one of those-those _imposters_ in my mouth! I have standards!"

"Then why did you eat that egg salad sandwich that was sitting on the roof of some hippies car last week?" Freddie asked.

Sam punched him in the arm again.

"Okay, Sam," Carly sighed. "I'm sure the people at the Fat Cake company are very sorry they've done this to you, but they probably had no choice. They're probably cheaper to make now, and you know that whole economy thing…"

"But I never go to say goodbye to them," Sam said sadly. "All the stores only have the new ones now."

"I know Sam," Carly said. "How about I let you egg Lewbert's car? I won't yell at you for it or anything."

"Okay," Sam sniffed.

….

_Next Day_

Freddie poked his head into the Shay's apartment and saw Carly sitting on the couch knitting a scarf. "Hey," he said. "Is Sam here?"

"Yeah, she's up in the studio," Carly replied. "She's mourning Fat Cakes still. Go be a good boyfriend and cheer her up."

"I am," Freddie said. "Nice scarf, by the way."

"It's a sweater!"

Freddie took the elevator up to the iCarly studio and found Sam, wearing black jeans and a black T-shirt, sitting on a beanbag chair, flipping through last years Fat Cake catalogue.

"Hi," he said, sitting down next to her.

"Hey," she said, not looking up from the catalogue. "Look at them! So young and pure. Little did they know that soon they would be destroyed!"

"Yes, it's very…sad," Freddie said. "Anyway, I got you something that might make you feel better." He took a bag out of his backpack and placed it on his girlfriend's lap.

"Nothing can make me feel better. Unless you got me the head of the Fat Cake director who made this stupid decision…"

"Just open the bag," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

Sam glared at him, but obliged and looked inside the bag. She gasped. It was two boxes of the original Fat Cakes.

"I-how did you-?" Sam stammered.

"I called a bunch of stores to see if they might have any left," Freddie explained, grinning at the sight of her awe-struck face. "I finally found one four hours away that had these two boxes left, so I drove there last night."

"You drove four hours to get these?"

"Well eight, if you count the return trip, but it's nothing," he said modestly.

Sam grabbed his neck and pulled him into a kiss.


	32. Chapter 32

_Post_

"Why do you always have to be such a huge dork?" Sam yelled to Freddie.

"Why do you always have to be so vicious?" he yelled back.

"Guy, stop-" Carly tried to cut in, but her attempts were drowned out by the two's arguing.

"I'm not vicious, I'm perfectly nice!" Sam exclaimed at the top of her lungs, lunging forward to try to grab Freddie and teach him a lesson.

"Ha! As if!" Freddie laughed, dodging the blonde. "You're just naturally obnoxious and rude! It's your fault we're stuck doing this in the first place!"

The iCarly trio was currently in T-bo's backyard working to build a canopy over his patio, since the previous day the three, well, actually, just Sam, had broken his brand new smoothie machine by throwing a meatball, which was supposed to hit Freddie, but he had ducked.

"You guys, come on, let's just finish this so we can get back home," Carly sighed. Her friends didn't seem to hear her though. Groaning in frustration, she grabbed each of their wrists, and dragged them over to one of the posts that was going to hold up the canopy. Sam and Freddie were so engaged in their fight that they didn't even realize where Carly was leading them, or what she was doing, until it was too late.

"Hey!" they both exclaimed. "What are you doing?"

"I'm sick of you guys screaming at each other," Carly said, throwing the roll of duct tape that she had used to bind both their wrists to the post with. "So here's what's going to happen. You guys are going to stand there until _I _finish putting up this canopy, and then we'll see if I feel like letting you go!"

"Carly, you'd better let me out of here or I'll break my way through," Sam said, struggling to free her wrist.

"Good luck, that's half a roll of super extreme strength duct tape there, guaranteed to hold something down in hurricane strength winds."

Sam, seeing that she wasn't going to be able to get out of the tape, slumped against the pole in defeat.

"Aw, someone not strong enough to get out?" Freddie asked, mocking her.

Sam kicked him in the shin.

"Ow!"

"Man up. Jeesh, Carly just had to tape our hands so close together, didn't she?"

The way Carly had positioned them, the two were practically hand in hand.

"What? Afraid of cooties?" Freddie asked, rolling his eyes.

"From you? Shoosh yeah."

"Well, I don't particularly like having your hand touching mine," Freddie snapped back.

"Well this is probably as close as you'll ever get to having a girl hold your hand, so enjoy it while you can."

"Yeah, when was the last time a boy held _your_ hand?"

Sam gave him a dark look, but didn't answer.

The two were quite for a moment, and then Freddie finally said. "Look, um, I'm sorry about saying that last thing."

"Yeah, well, guess what? You were right," Sam mumbled. "I haven't had any guy hold my hand since Pete, and that was almost two years ago."

"Oh…What ever happened with him?"

"He got freaked out when he found out I could beat him in arm wrestling," she shrugged. "He said it was cool if I could beat up _other _people, but he said it made him feel weird to be dating a girl that was stronger than him."

"But-you beat all the guys in arms wrestling," Freddie reasoned. "That's no reason to dump you?"

"Yeah well, tell that to him. Same thing happens with every other guy. You're the only one that doesn't freak out when I beat you in under three seconds."

"Well, um, I guess-"

"Okay, I'm done," Carly said, coming over to her friends with a pair of scissors. "I guess since you didn't kill each other, I can let you go."

She cut through the duct tape, and the two removed their wrists.

"Just promise you'll _try_ to act nicer to each other, okay?"

Sam and Freddie looked at each other.

"Pfft, like I'd ever be nice to the nub," Sam scoffed.

"Why would I be friendly to a demon?" Freddie spat back.

"Uggg, let's just go," Carly sighed.

Sam and Freddie followed behind her. While she wasn't looking, Sam gave Freddie a small smile, which he returned. She then proceeded to punch him in the arm.


	33. Chapter 33

_Command_

Sam didn't ask anybody anything. She commanded it.

Freddie, of course, being her boyfriend, noticed this a lot.

"Freddie, take me to dinner tonight," she might say. Or, "Freddie, take me to the Groovy Smoothie."

Please was a word that simply wasn't in her vocabulary. Freddie, however, decided to see if he could change this. Carly warned him that he would just wind up getting his head stuffed in the toilet again, but he stubbornly refused to set down.

"Freddie, get me a soda," Sam said one evening on the Shay's couch.

"Freddie, get me a soda, what?" Freddie asked.

Carly, who had been sitting next to Sam, sensed that things were about to get fighty and ran up to the studio before she could get caught in the crossfire.

"Did I stutter? Go, Mama's thirsty."  
"I will, when you say the magic word."

Sam seemed surprised at his daring. Sure, the nub had gotten more of a backbone over the years, but this? This was just crazy.

"I'm thirsty," she said, glaring at her boyfriend. "I want soda."

"Then you know what you have to do."

"Yeah, beat you until I get it."

"Beating me still won't get you a soda," he said, crossing his arms, sort of enjoying this.

Sam weighed her options in her head. She was very thirsty, and she certainly wasn't going to get up and get the soda herself. It seemed like the only thing to do…

"Get me a soda, please, King of the Geekiest."

"I'd be glad to," Freddie said, getting up, not even noticing the insult at the end of her statement.


	34. Chapter 34

_Witnessed _

Carly Shay walked, stunned, back to her apartment.

"Hey, kiddo," Spencer greeted his little sister from the kitchen where he was making spaghetti tacos. "Whoa, what's with the weird face."

Carly didn't answer. She was still too shocked over what she just witnessed.

"Carly?" Spencer asked, going over to her. "Hello, earth to Carly? What's going on with you? Was it Canadians?"

"No!" Carly said, finally speaking as she sank down onto the couch. "It-It was-"

"Just calm down," Spencer said. "And tell me slowly."

"It was Sam. And Freddie. At the groovy smoothie. Sam-Sam-"

"What? What did Sam do? Oh my God, did she kill Freddie and dump his body in the pacific ocean?"

Carly shook her head.

"She-Freddie-Freddie-"

"Spit it out, woman!"

"Freddie asked her for a bite of her hamburger!" Carly exclaimed, her face still horror stricken. "AHH!" Spencer screamed, jumping up. "That's-that's suicide! Sam doesn't share food; especially meat! Does he think being her boyfriend gives him those types of perks? What's wrong with that boy?"

"I told him not to," Carly said, shaking at the memory. "But he wouldn't listen."

"He's sitting in the hospital now, isn't he? He's probably got tubes everywhere…I've got to call Mrs. Benson-"

"She said yes," Carly said. "Sam-Sam gave Freddie a bite of her hamburger."

Spencer dropped his phone. "No! Was it poisoned?"

Carly shook her head.

"I-I you must've been seeing things," Spencer said, refusing to believe the insanity Carly was telling him. "That's-that's just crazy."

"It's true," Carly said, now rocking herself on the couch, looking absolutely terrified.

"I-what-how?" Spencer stammered as he sat down on the couch and rocked along with Carly.

That was exactly how Sam and Freddie found them two hours later.


	35. Chapter 35

_Infect_

"So, I think we should do our blindfolded egg race before the trampoline bit," Carly said as her and Freddie sat in her living room planning out the next iCarly. "That way we'll have time for Gibby to eat the carton of radishes."

"Sounds good," Freddie said, typing this into his computer. "We've got next weeks show planned."

"Yeah, no thanks to Sam," Carly pointed out. "Where is she? I told her to be here by noon."

"And I reminded her when I dropped her off at her house after we went out to dinner last night," Freddie nodded. "She isn't answering any of my texts…I'm starting to think maybe we should go over there and-"

The Shay's door suddenly flew open to reveal Sam. "You," she hissed at Freddie.

"What?" Freddie answered, instantly moving behind Carly for protection.

"You-You infected me with your nerdieness!" she exclaimed, making a lunge for her boyfriend's collar. "I'm going to kill you, Benson!"

"Sam, we don't kill our boyfriends!" Carly said, grabbing Sam to hold her back from Freddie. "And what do you mean by he infected you?"

"You want to know why I missed the iCarly meeting?" she yelled, still staring daggers at Freddie, who looked positively terrified.

"Um, sure, why?" Carly asked.

"Because, I was watching T.V. at four this morning because I couldn't sleep, and guess what I found on?"

"What?"

"Galaxy Wars! The entire trilogy was on! I started to change the channel, but I couldn't do it!"

"Wait," Freddie said, regaining his composure. "You're telling me that you sat and watched the eight hour trilogy without being forced or coerced with bacon?"

"It's your fault!" she screamed, grabbing his arm and twisting it into a very painful position.

"Ah! Sam! You're hurting me!"

"Ever since I started smacking lips with you, I've been more and more into that stupid sci-fi stuff!" She released Freddie, but continued to advance on him in a menacing way. "Plus, you know what I got on our last math test? A B! You wanna know why? Because I studied! Sam Puckett doesn't study! _Or _watch Galaxy Wars! Look what you've done to me!"

"You like Galaxy Wars," Freddie said, grinning. "Admit it."

"Don't sas me, Fredwad," she snapped.

"You liked it," he repeated, all fear lost. "What was your favorite part?"

"You're asking for it."

"Come on, tell me."

"The part when Lou Groundrunner found out that his father was-" she quickly covered her mouth with her hands, refusing to say anymore.

"Wow, Sam, I would've never figured you would end up being a fan of that movie," Carly said.

"What happened to me?" Sam asked fearfully.

"Face it, Puckett," Freddie laughed, putting his arm around her. "I'm rubbing off on you."

"No!"


	36. Chapter 36

_Lovely_

Sam was laying on the Shay's couch, eating a bucket of fried chicken, as Carly frantically ran around the apartment getting ready for her date.

"Have you seen my white heels?" she asked Sam, looking by the elevator.

"Didn't we use them in that iCarly bit with the wiener dog?"

"Yes! Thank God; I would've had to find a whole new outfit if I lost those shoes!"

"They're shoes, Carl, I'm sure Tag won't dump you because they didn't coordinate with your outfit perfectly."

Carly ignored her, and ran up to the studio.

"Hey," Freddie said, walking into the apartment, laptop in hand. "Carly leave for her date yet?"

"No, she had a shoe issue."

"Can I have some chicken?"

"Are you crazy?"

"Come on, I'm your boyfriend, don't I get some poultry?"

"You can have the bones."

"Okay, I think I'm ready," Carly said, descending down the stairs. "Tag just called me from the restaurant and said they're getting our table ready-Ah! A thread is coming loose from my dress!"

"Just break it," Sam said.

But Carly had already run back up to her room to find a new dress.

"You know what I love about you?" Freddie asked.

"My spunk?"

"Well, yes, that," he laughed. "But you're not like that."

"Like what?"

"All vain and obsessed with appearances and…lovely."

"Excuse me? Are you calling me ugly?"

"No!" Freddie replied quickly. "Never; you're the most beautiful girl in the world to me, Sam, but I just like the fact that you don't sit there and freak out about shoes and loose threads. I mean, nothing against Carly, she's like my sister, but I don't like that in a girl."

"And what do you like in a girl?" Sam asked, smiling slightly.  
"Well, that can look stunning in sweats, for one," Freddie said, playing with the ends of Sam's baggy red sweat pants. "And also that she's fun, and interesting."

"I do keep you on your toes, don't I Fredpox?"

"Yes you do. And I want a girl that is confident, and strong, and can eat twice her body weight in meat."

"Well aren't you just in a flattery mood," Sam grinned. "Are you trying to get me to make out with you?"

"Maybe. Is it working?"

"Figure it out," Sam said, leaning in to kiss him.


	37. Chapter 37

_Express_

Sam was never one to express her feelings. Feelings were for the weak; she was strong, and therefore, should have no feelings. Or, at least, she shouldn't display them for the world to see like some daffodil.

Freddie challenged this though, and as they both got older, Sam found it harder and harder to contain her feelings around the boy.

It was hard to keep from grinning like a stupid schoolgirl after that first kiss on the fire escape.

It was hard to pretend that she didn't want to scream when Melanie went out with him.

It was hard not to feel upset when he called her a demon.

It was hard not to say anything when Carly asked her if she liked the kiss.

It was hard not to curl up in a ball after she saw him and Carly slow dancing.

It was hard to keep from bursting out in tears when Carly and Freddie dated, and even harder not to cheer when they broke up.

But most of all, it was hard to constantly say 'I hate you' when all she wanted to say was 'I love you.'


	38. Chapter 38

_Shut_

"If you would've just kept your mouth shut, Sam, we wouldn't be in this mess, now would we?" Freddie said loudly as he and Sam entered the Shay's apartment.

"Oh, can it, Benson," Sam retorted.

"What's going on?" Carly asked her best friends.

"Well Sam and I were on our way out of the school today after we finished working on our class project with Gibby when Mr. Howard walked by," Freddie explained. "And Sam here just couldn't keep her big mouth shut and called him a Bald Headed robweed."

"What's a robweed?" Carly asked.

Sam whispered it in her ear.  
"Sam!" Carly exclaimed. "Why would you say that to a teacher?"

"He was looking at me weird!"

"So of course Mr. Howard got mad," Freddie continued. "And gave her a weeks worth of after-school detention. And then you want to know what he did? He gave _me_ the same punishment for not stopping her!"

"So you both have after-school detention? But we have to plan next week's iCarly," Carly said.

"Well, thank Sam," he said. "If she could just keep quiet for once in her life-"

"Hey, why don't you watch it!" Sam yelled.

"Why don't you shut up!"

"Freddie," Carly said quietly.

"Fine," Sam shrugged, looking shocked that Freddie had said that. "I won't talk to you anymore."

"Good," Freddie said, slightly surprised that Sam hadn't ripped his head off.

_Next Day_

Sam had stayed true to her word and hadn't said a single thing to Freddie all day. Freddie, having cooled down from the previous day, was beginning to feel bad about what he had said to her.

"Sam," he said for the fifth time. "Sam, come on, I know you're just dying to talk."

Sam said nothing as she took a Fat Cake from her locker. School had just let out, but the two still had to serve their detentions.

"Sam, please talk," Freddie begged as they made their way to Mr. Howard's room. She remained silent.

After Mr. Howard took attendance and gave everyone a five-minute lecture on why they were a drain on society, he left to go to the teacher's lounge.

"Sam," Freddie said once the teacher had left. "Look, I'm sorry about telling you to shut up. I didn't mean to be such a jerk about it."

Sam still said nothing, and began to doodle in her notebook as she ate her Fat Cake.

"Come on," Freddie continued. "I-I miss talking to you, okay. Happy?"

"Very," Sam grinned. "Knew you couldn't last one day without me talking to you."

"Wait; you weren't mad?"

"Nah, my mom tells me to shut up all the time," she shrugged. "Of course," she punched him in the arm. "You'll need to start showing Mama more respect."

"Ow!"


	39. Chapter 39

_Inhabitant_

When Sam and Freddie got married, they decided that it would be easiest just to move into the empty apartment on the third floor of Bushwell Plaza.

And as everyone soon found out, these two were certainly…unusual inhabitants.

At any given time, some one could walk past their door and hear the couple's latest argument or Freddie's cries of pain.

Sam had gotten one of her mom's ex boyfriends to rig the doorknob so when someone tried to enter they received 500 volts of electricity. Of course, she didn't tell anybody this until Spencer tried to visit her and Freddie, and wound up on the floor.

Every Monday Lewbert had to deal with a huge delivery of meats to last Sam the week. He would rant and rave as the deliverymen carried ham after ham through his lobby.

And nobody could forget the time Sam locked Freddie out in the hall in his boxers.

"You guys, I can hear you from my room, you know," Carly had told them one day. "Have you ever actually carried on a conversation at a normal volume?"

"We do talk at a normal volume," Sam claimed. "Maybe you just have keen hearing."

"Besides, it's impossible not to yell when you live with this one," Freddie pointed out. "You want to know what she did to me while I was sleeping? She glued me to our bed!"

"How did you even do that?" Carly couldn't help but ask.

"It's easy; Freddie sleeps like a rock," Sam shrugged. "All you need is three tubes of superglue."

"You know, traditionally, husbands and wives are supposed to be pleasant to each other," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"We are pleasant to each other," Sam said. "At times. Right Freddiwich?"

"Yeah, I guess," he grinned.

"Oh my God, gross!" Carly exclaimed, as her best friends exchanged a kiss.


	40. Chapter 40

**AN-This is sort of a continuation of the last chapter, which I wrote for Coco29. It's a continuation in the sense that Sam and Freddie are still married and living in Bushwell Plaza, driving everyone there crazy. **

…

_Argument _

Freddie groaned as his alarm clock rang, waking him from his deep sleep. Shutting it off, he slowly got out of bed, yawning and stretching.

"Sam," he said sleepily, shaking his wife's shoulder. "Sam, come one. We promised Carly we would go up to her apartment and help her with that charity breakfast she planned."

"Shut up and let me sleep, dipthong," Sam mumbled, not opening her eyes.

"Get up," he said, pulling the covers off the bed.

Sam still didn't move.

"Fine," Freddie said. "But remember, Sam. You left me no choice."

He left their bedroom, and came back a minute later with a pitcher of cold water, which he poured all over Sam.

Well that certainly got Sam up. She jumped up, dripping wet.

"What the heck were you thinking, nub?" she hissed, pulling her soaked hair out of her eyes.  
"I-I-You wouldn't get up," Freddie stammered nervously, slowly backing away.

"You don't _ever _wake me up like that," she said in a dangerously calm voice. "I wake up when I want to. Understand?"

"Perfectly, sweetheart. You know, you look really sexy with wet hair, it's a great look on- AHHH!"

Sam lunged for Freddie's neck. He moved just in time, and ran out of the room, Sam hot on his heels.

He flung open their apartment door and ran to the stairs.

"Sam! Sam! Don't! Killing me is not the answer!" he cried as he ran up the steps.

"We'll see about that!" Sam screamed.

As they ran down the halls, the occupants of the apartments sighed in their own bedrooms, barely batting an eyelash from the series of screams that could clearly be head through their walls; this happened at least once a week.

"Carly!" Freddie yelled as he reached the eighth floor. "Carly! Carly! Open up! She's going to kill me!"

Sam, who had been on his tail, took this chance to tackle her husband to the ground in front of apartment 8C.

She had him pinned down and was sitting on his stomach, her knee very close to his neck, when Carly and Spencer opened their door.

"Say it!" Sam exclaimed. "Say it!"

"I was a complete dork to dare wake up my wonderful wife!" Freddie said hoarsely. "I don't know what I was thinking. From now on, she can sleep until four in the afternoon if she so wishes!"

"Um, should we do something?" Spencer asked uncertainly, looking at his little sister.

"Nah, this is actually one of their tamer arguments," Carly shrugged. "No blood spill this time."

Sam got off of Freddie. "Got any bacon?" she asked casually to Spencer.

"Yeah, in the fridge."

"Dude," Carly laughed to Freddie. "What started _this_ argument?"

"I poured cold water on her to wake her up."

"That's suicide!"

"Yes, thank you Carly"

"You know, Lewbert's starting to complain to me about you guys," she continued. "He said that your arguments are getting to loud and rambunctious."

"Why's he complaining to you about us?"

"Because when he went up to your apartment Sam pulled his pants down and threw her Fat Shake in his face."

"Oh yeah…"

"Can't you just cut down on the arguments a little, you guys?" Carly asked her two friends. "I mean, you're married now, for Pete's sake."

Sam and Freddie looked at each other.

"Nah."


	41. Chapter 41

_Quote _

"I win again!" Sam said triumphantly, waving her video game controlled around in the air. "Mama is the master!"

"You cheated," Freddie mumbled.

"You just suck."

"Guys, can not kill each other today, please?" Carly asked her best friends. "I just got the blood off the wall form your last fight."

"What are you doing, anyway?" Sam asked, walking over to the computer where Carly was seated

"I found this cool website with all these quotes on it," Carly explained. "They're kind of neat. Oh, this one really describes you too: 'What you love is always greater than what you hate'."

"Um how does that describe us?" Freddie frowned.

"Oh come on," Carly said. "You guys constantly fight, but you know your best friends."

Sam and Freddie exchanged disgusted looks.

"You guys get on each others nerves, sure," Carly continued. "But you care about each other deep down."

"How deep down are you talking about, Carls," Sam said. "Because, there's no way I care about this nub."

"Yes," Carly nodded. "Remember back when you told all our iCarly viewers that you hadn't kissed anybody either just so they would stop teasing Freddie."

Sam shrugged but said nothing.

"And Freddie," Carly said, turning to him. "Remember when you gave up that fancy School at Sea trip to Missy just so she would leave because she was being all nasty to Sam."

"That was supposed to be a secret!" Freddie hissed.

"Wait, you won that trip?" Sam asked.

"Yes. And then I asked Principal Franklin if I could give it to Missy."

"Why would you do that?"

"Because-she was being awful to you, and well, that one night you came to me, you seemed really upset, okay?"

Sam was speechless.

"So you guys see," Carly said victoriously. "You guys might drive one another insane to the point where you want to strangle one another, but you'll always be there for each other."

"I guess," they both mumbled, though each showing small smiled.


	42. Chapter 42

_Internally _

Physically, once Sam and Freddie started dating, you'd think no big change had happened to Sam.

She still wore her shorts and capris and bright, layered shirts.

She still carried a bag of ribs in her bag wherever she went.

She still tried to maintain the record she had been working on for smelliest pair of shoes.

She still screamed at anybody who dared cross her path, and would beat up a six foot man in a second.

But internally…

She got the cliché butterflies in her stomach whenever Freddie smiled at her.

Her brain would stumbled trying to find the right thing to say when they were alone that wouldn't make her seem like an insensitive girl.

She felt fireworks erupt whenever they kissed.

She felt her hear skip a beat when they held hands.

Sam hated when this happened, for it was outside of her control, but whenever Freddie came around, it all started again, and she couldn't help but push that hatred away for just a minute.


	43. Chapter 43

_Extend_

"Wow, I can't believe the Dorfman's are finally gone!" Carly said happily as she closed the door behind her relatives. "That week really dragged on!"

"Tell me about it; I can't believe they threw out all the meat in your fridge!" Sam exclaimed.

"Yeah, and that Oswalis kid really creped me out," Freddie added.

"Well, what can I say; my extended family is a bunch of freaks," Carly laughed.

"Um, excuse me, I think I have that category won, thank you," Sam said.

"Oh yeah, I forgot," Carly said.

"Actually, I think my extended family's pretty bad," Freddie said.

"Mine's way worse than yours," Sam spat at him.

"No way," Freddie replied.

"Really? Because just last week my cousin Bert got arrested for breaking into the armadillo exhibit at the zoo to try to marry one!"

"Oh yeah?" Freddie challenged. "Well last week my Aunt Gloria tried to convince the International House of Waffles that their recipe was too unhealthy and spent over an hour screaming at the manager to replace it with her own gluten free one!"

"My Uncle Rick got a tattoo of a guy getting a tattoo on his thigh!" Sam yelled.

"My second cousin won't go outside on Tuesday's because she thinks she's been cursed by a Mexican Sorcerer!"

"My grandma spends $500 a week to have two dudes rub ketchup on her elbows!"

"My grandpa won't eat foods that start with the letter 'N'!"

"My step-Aunt will only eat soup with a fork!"

"My great-Uncle has a mustache down to his hips!"

"My cousin-"

"Enough!" Carly said loudly. "I get it; you both have a crazy extended family."

"Mine's still crazier," Sam mumbled.

"Is not!"

"Does it matter?" Carly screamed. "Next week after you two get married you'll get each other's dysfunctional families and then you can both be the winners of this stupid contest, okay?"

Freddie grinned at his fiancé. "I can live with that."

"Yeah, I guess I can too," Sam replied, wrapping her arms around Freddie.


	44. Chapter 44

_Blob_

"Jason, come on, we're going to be late!" Sam called upstairs to her son.

"I can't believe he's starting kindergarten already," Carly said. "He seems so little!"

"Well kindergarten generally is a place for little kids," Freddie laughed.

"You know what I mean."

"Jason!" Sam called again. "Your breakfast is getting cold!"

"Coming!" Jason replied, running down the stairs, his _Galaxy Wars _backpack in one hand, and his beloved brown teddy bear in the other. "Blob's coming to school with me, mommy!"

"Blob?" Carly asked.

"His bear," whispered Freddie.

"Jason, you can't bring toys to school with you," Sam tried to reason as she slid his plate in front of him.

"But I love Blob."

"Aw, Sam let him take it," Carly said. "He's so cute!"

"Shut it, Shay," Sam said. "Or mark my words, once you have kids, I'm going to corrupt their minds."

"Noted," Carly said, dropping the matter at once.

"Jason, none of the other boys and girls are going to bring their toys," said Freddie.

"How do you know?"

"Because-because I just do."

"How?"

"Because we know everything," Sam said simply.

"But daddy said no one knows everything."

"Okay, fine. I know everything. Daddy was wrong."

"Sam!"

"Look, Jason," she said, sitting down next to the boy. "I know how much you love Blob. And he loves you too. But at kindergarten, you'll meet lots of new friends, and get to play with lots of new toys. You'll have so much fun! But you know what? Everyday when you get home, Blob will be sitting right here waiting for you to tell him all about school!"

"Really momma?"

"Yup."

"Well, okay. I guess I'll leave him home. Will you take care of him?"

"Sure. I'll even make his favorite lunch."

"Alright."

"Good. Now go get your jacket. We need to leave."

Jason hopped off his seat and ran back upstairs.

"Oh my God, Sam," Carly said. "You are such a good mom!"

"I know," she said nonchalantly. "And by the way, nub. I thought I told you to take back that _Galaxy Wars _backpack!"

"Oh come on! It's so cool! I had one just like it when I was in kindergarten."

"Why do you think I wanted you to take it back? You'll turn the poor kid into a dork before he can even read."

"You think I'm a dork?"

"Absolutely," she said, kissing him. "The biggest one I've met."

…

AN- I had actually written this when I was doing the Seddie baby arc about twenty chapters back and forgot to upload it...Oh well, better late than never.


	45. Chapter 45

_Continent_

"Whoo! Mama got double sixes again!" Sam exclaimed happily. The iCarly trio was playing one of Spencer's own bored games, _Venture_, in which players had to try to take over as many continents as they could.

"And that gives me all of Europe," she said happily.

"No, I still have England," Freddie pointed out. "And wait until you see what I have in store; there's going to be nothing left of your army when I'm done."

"Eh, that's all talk, Benson," Sam shrugged. "You've got nothing."

"Guys, what did we say before we started the game?" Carly asked her bickering friends.

"We'd play nicely and respectably," the said together in a monotone voice.

"Good, now do it," she commanded them. "And pass me the dice, it's my turn."

"Here you go, kid," Sam said, handing her the dice.

"Yay! I've nearly got all of Antarctica," Carly said happily, rolling a nine.

"Carly, why would you waste your time getting Antarctica," Freddie asked, rolling his eyes. "You're supposed to go for the big continents, like Europe and North America and Asia."

"Well I would've gone for North America, but you killed my men!"

"It's war, Carly!"

"You could still be nice!"

"Carly, this is a game of strategy," Freddie tried to explain to her. "You need to carefully develop a game plane and try to execute it as swiftly as possible."

"No, it's about total domination," Sam countered. "You don't need a plan; just a really big army."

"Strategy!"

"Army!"

"Strategy!"

"Okay," Sam said. "Let's make it interesting. Whoever takes over Africa first wins this argument."

"Deal," Freddie said, grabbing the dice. "But you're going down!"

"Yeah, sure I am," Sam scoffed as Freddie rolled a two.

Sam rolled a double five, which yielded her another turn, and then rolled a twelve. Within three turns she had successfully taken over the continent.

"Oh yeah!" she said. "Who's the best? I'm the best!"

"Whatever," Freddie muttered, eyeing Sam's plastic playing pieces with hatred.

"Now you have to buy me a smoothie," Sam said.

"I already buy all your smoothies," Freddie laughed.

"Because you're such a good little boyfriend," she grinned, patting his head. "Now go. I want a an extra-large blueberry cherry splat."

"Fine," Freddie sighed. "Hey, where's Carly?"

"I quit a long time ago," she said from the kitchen, watching the scene with amusement.


	46. Chapter 46

_Composer_

"No way!" Sam said excitedly as she looked on the Shay's computer screen. "Martin Holmes is coming to Seattle!"

"Um, who?" Carly asked.

"You don't know who Martin Holmes is?" Sam exclaimed.

"Neither do I," Freddie added.

"Yeah, well, you're a nub."

"So who is he?" Carly laughed before Freddie could retaliate.

"He's my all time favorite composer! He's so amazing!"

"Who has a favorite composer?" Freddie sniggered.

Sam threw an orange at him. "I do! You got a problem with it?"

"No, no problem," Freddie moaned, massaging the spot on his head where the orange hit.

"You really like this dude?" Carly asked.

"Yes! He writes the best music ever! When I was little and danced for those stupid pageants, I made sure my dance teacher only picked songs he wrote."

"You should get tickets to see his show," Carly said.

"I can't," Sam sighed. "They cost over $100 each, and I spent all my money on that new bacon flavored toothpaste."

"Aw, that sucks," Carly said.

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "Man, I would give up ham for a whole day to see this guy!"

…

"Hey," Freddie greeted Sam as he walked into the Shay's apartment. "Is Carly here?"

"Nah, she had a date tonight," Sam replied. "With that boy from Pink Bunny."

"Oh," Freddie said. "So you're just sitting here alone tonight?"

"If you'd leave and let me get back to that, yes," Sam said.

"Okay," Freddie shrugged. "But I was just thinking maybe you'd like to something better…"

"What?" Sam asked, her interest peaking.

"Here." He took an envelope out of his pocket and tossed it over to her.

Sam looked at him suspiciously, but opened it anyway.

"What?" she gasped, as two tickets to see Martin Holmes's show fell out. "You got these?"

"Yeah, I bought them on Ticket Guru a few weeks ago," he nodded. "After you were saying how much you loved him the other day, I went home and found some of the songs he composed. He's really good."

"Well duh! But, didn't these cost like $200?"

"I returned the space heater my grandma sent me for my birthday. So, do you want to go to the show? Of course, you'd have to be stuck with me the whole night, but-"

"For Martin Holmes, I can handle being in public with Sir Nub," Sam said happily, jumping up.

"Sir Nub? That's a new one. Come on, let's go. The show starts in less than an hour."

"Yo, dork," Sam said, throwing on her jacket.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks…and if you tell anyone I said that, I'll beat you flatter than waffle. Kapesh?"

"Kapesh."

…

AN- Sooooooo, who lost their mind? I did. I must've watched ILMM at least ten times so far!


	47. Chapter 47

_Python_

"Hey," Freddie greeted his wife as she walked though the door. "What's in the box?"

"Well," Sam said, carefully setting the box down on their kitchen table. "I was walking through the mall with Carly, you know, trying to get her to buy me another corn dog, when I saw it in the window."

"Saw what?"

"It was so adorable! I had to buy it! I loved the color, the way it looked, and it's perhaps the best thing I have ever spent good money on."

"So what is it? A dress or something?"

Sam looked at him like he was crazy. "A dress? Really nub?"

"Yeah, I don't know what I was thinking," he laughed, getting up to give her a kiss. "But come on, what is it?"

"Okay, close your eyes and I'll show you."

"Close my eyes?" he repeated. This sounded like one of Sam's infamous set-ups.

"Yes!" she nodded. "What? You don't trust your wife?"

"Fine," he conceded, closing his eyes. "But if I end up with another pretzel shoved up my nose, you're-AH!"

He felt something cold and heavy and, more importantly, moving in his hands. He opened his eyes to see a three-foot snake in his hands.

"Sam!"

"What? You don't think he's precious?"

"Precious?" he exclaimed, dropping the snake back in its box. "You bought a python!"

"His name is Baco-Snake," she corrected him, picking up the snake and smiling at it fondly.

"Baco-Snake? Sam, you did not get this at a pet shop."

"Pet shop, guy in an alley, same thing," she shrugged.

"That thing can squeeze us to death," he told her.

"But he's just a baby. Isn't he cute?"

"Cute? No! Puppies are cute, not that thing!"

Sam gasped.

"Look," Freddie tried to reason with his wife. "I know it's small now, but it's going to grow."

"But if we train him-"

Freddie gave her a look.

"Okay," she mumbled, looking sadly down at the creature in her hands. "I'll take him back."

"Thank you," Freddie said, relieved.

"Tomorrow."


	48. Chapter 48

_Flavor_

"No way," Sam said, crossing her arms.

"I'm telling you," Freddie said, smirking at his girlfriend. "I can do it."

"It's impossible," Sam said firmly.

The couple was sitting in Sam's living room. They had just finished up one of their many make-out sessions, after which, Freddie had announced to her that she was in fact wearing mango lip gloss. Sam was shocked that he could actually name the flavor since she didn't think those lip gloss flavors tasted at all like what the label claimed (when she was ten she ate a tube of coconut lip gloss when she couldn't find any food was very upset to find that it did not taste good at all). Sam told him that he had simply made a lucky guess, which led Freddie to bet her that he could do it again with a different flavor.

"Are you afraid you're going to lose?" Freddie asked cockily.

"Pfft, as if," Sam sneered. "Hold on. I'll be back and I'll prove to you that you're just a good guesser."

She ran up to her room, and returned a minute later with a shoebox filled with tubes of flavored lip-gloss.

"Wow, I didn't think you had this many," Freddie laughed, looking at the many tubes in the box.

"I don't. Most of these are Melanie's and Carly's. Now close your eyes."

She pulled out a tube of strawberry lip-gloss and applied it to her lips. Then she leaned over and kissed Freddie.

"Strawberry," he said as soon as Sam pulled away.

"Another lucky guess," Sam mumbled. "You won't get lucky a third time."

After wiping off the strawberry lip-gloss, she applied a layer of grape, and kissed Freddie again.

"Hmm," Freddie said. "Grape?"

"You're cheating!" Sam exclaimed.  
"No I'm not!" Freddie laughed. "Come on, try it one more time."

Eager to prove her boyfriend wrong, Sam dug through the shoebox until she found a tube that was actually hers: bacon flavored.

After covering her lips in it, she kissed Freddie for the third time.

"Is that bacon?" Freddie asked.

"How do you do that?" Sam said angrily.

"It's a gift, I guess," he shrugged. "Point is, I win! And more importantly, you lose!"

"Shut up," she snapped, punching him hard on the shoulder.

"Ow! Sam!"

"Freddie!"

"Come here," Freddie said, pulling Sam close to him.

"What?"

"I really liked that bacon flavored one," he grinned, and kissed her, enjoying the meaty flavor of her lips on his.


	49. Chapter 49

_Bookstore_

"I hate books, Fredbag," Sam said as she followed her boyfriend into the bookstore. "Why would I want to go into a store of them?"

"I just need to pick something up," he told her.

"You said we were going to get Fat Cakes!"

"We will, now shh! Or they'll kick us out!"

"Now that'd be a tragedy," Sam mumbled.

Freddie headed over to the Sci-Fi shelf and began looking for the latest installment of _Captain Incredible_, while Sam leaned against the shelf.

"It's bad enough you watch that stuff," she said. "Now you have to read it?"

"It's good! Why don't you try one?"

"Because I'm not a total nub."

"What? Because I like quality literature I'm a nub?"

"No, you're a nub for many reason."

"You're dating a nub then!"

"You'll be dating my fist in a minute!"

"Read the book!"

"No!"

"Just the first chapter?"  
"Not in your life."

"The first sentence?"

Sam grabbed the book and tossed it over the shelf, hitting a woman in the head. "There, now even you can't read the first sentence."

"Sam! You just threw the best book of the series! That was the one that was finally going to reveal Lady Krypton's secret identity!"

"Oh no," she said sarcastically.

"You know what? I'm going to _make_ you read one of these books. Come here Puckett!"

He grabbed Sam's waist and began dragging her towards the shelf. Sam kicked him in the shin, causing him to cry out in pain.

"Um, excuse me?" the manager of the bookstore said, walking over to the couple. "I'm going to have to ask you two to leave."

"What? It's all her!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Sir, I'm going to have to call security on you two if you don't-"

"Come on, nub," Sam said. "You owe me Fat Cakes."

"But my book-" Freddie said weakly.

…..

"Wow, first the restaurant, then the bakery, now the bookstore," Carly laughed. "You two won't have anywhere left to go soon."

"Tell me about it," Freddie nodded.

"What's up people?" Sam asked, walking through the door to the Shay's apartment.

"I was just telling Carly how you got us kicked out of the bookstore last night," Freddie said.

"First of all, you should know better than to drag me there," Sam replied. "Second of all, it was partly your fault too, and third of all, here." She tossed him a bag and walked over to the fridge.

"Sam, this is the book I was going to buy last night," Freddie said, flabbergasted.

"I know," she said, grabbing a tube of cookie dough. "I bought it for you last week. I didn't want you to buy the same one."

"Wait, so _that's_ why you threw the book and everything?" Freddie asked. "You could've just _told _me."

"Yeah, I know," she grinned. "But come on, which way's more fun?"


	50. Chapter 50

_Burn_

"Mother of ham!" Sam angrily exclaimed.

"What did you do?" Carly asked, running into her kitchen.

"I burned myself on the stupid frying pan," she replied, wincing as she looked at her red hand.

"Oh, it looks pretty bad," Carly said, looking at her hand closely. "I'll go get some ointment from the medicine cabinet."

Just as Carly ran to get the ointment, Freddie walked in.

"Hey," he greeted Sam.

"Not now, nub."

"What's wrong with your hand?" he asked, concerned.

"I burnt it, okay?"

"Since when do you cook?"

"Since Spencer ran out of good food. I was trying to make my own version of the Fat Cake."

"With mustard, jam, cereal, ice cream and hot dogs?" Freddie asked, looking into the pan.

"I would've added bacon but Spencer's a pig and ate it all."

"Why would you even _think_ that would taste good?"

"Why would you think it wouldn't?"

"Let me see your hand," he sighed.

Sam put out her hand.

"It doesn't look _too_ bad," he said. "It'll probably just hurt a little for a few days. Did you put anything on it yet?"

"Carly's getting ointment, but she's taking forever."

"Here," he said, reaching into the fridge and pulling out a stick of butter. "Let me rub this on it."

"Butter?" Sam frowned.

"Trust me, my mom taught me all about home remedies for injuries," he said. He rubbed a little on the burn. Sam winced at first, but then the pain began to subside.

"Hey, it worked!"

"You're welcome," Freddie said.

"Now I can get back to my creation."

"Seriously? No thank you, Puckett?" Freddie said. "Here I am, being the kind boyfriend, and I don't even get a little gratitude for-"

He was interrupted as Sam's lips crashed into his.

"There," she said once they broke apart. "Now stop your whining and go find Mama some hot sauce."


	51. Chapter 51

_Hotel_

"Tyler! Get down from there!" Carly yelled, chasing after the two year old. "And Jason, put down your sister!"

Carly was currently babysitting for Sam and Freddie's four children. And as these kids _did_ have Sam's genes, they were no easy batch to look after.

"Aunt Carly?" called six year old Emma from the kitchen. "Can I put my doll in the oven?"

"No!" Carly exclaimed, running into the kitchen. "And it's past midnight! You all should be in bed!"

"But I'm ten," whined Jason, who was busy trying to rub his boogers on Emma's twin sister, Ashton.

"Guys, your mom and dad are already going to kill me because the house is a mess, I don't want them to be mad because I let you stay up late too."

Right on cue, Sam and Freddie unlocked their front door and walked into the house.

"Why are they still up?" Sam asked Carly.

"And more importantly," Freddie said, picking up an empty carton of Fat Cakes. "How much sugar have they had tonight?"

"Well," Carly said. "I guess that would explain why they're so hyper, or, more hyper than usual at least."

"Kids!" Sam yelled, causing the four previously screaming kids to fall silent. "Whoever's not in their bed in the next two minutes doesn't get any ham for a week!"

All the kids were meat lovers, just like their mother, and scrambled to bed at once. All except little Tyler, of course, who was too little to tuck himself into bed.

"I'll get him," Freddie said, picking up his son. "Thanks for watching them tonight, Carls."

"What took you two so long?" Carly asked as Freddie headed upstairs. "I thought you said the movie ended at ten."

"We went somewhere else," Sam shrugged, setting her bag on the counter. "I'm hungry."

"Where did you go?"

"Just this coffee place?"

"Really? For two hours?"

"Yup."

"Okay," Carly nodded. "I believe you."

While Sam was opening a bag of chips, Carly quickly snatched Sam's bag off the counter.

"Hey!" Sam yelled, dropping the chips. "Put it down!"

"I want to see what was so important that you kept me with your crazed children!" Carly said, rummaging through the bag. "Ah-hah! A receipt for…_a hotel_?"

"Give me that," Sam snapped, snatching her bag back from Carly.

"You mean you didn't even go to the movie?"

"Yes, we went," Sam hissed. "And afterwards we were on our way back home when we passed Blue Roof Inn, and well…we decided to stop there for a couple hours. I mean, Tyler's going through this thing where he's afraid of his stuffed animals coming alive at night and eating him, so he usually ends up in our bed, so we haven't been able to-"

"Gross," Carly cringed. "I'm going."

"You're the one who wanted to know, Carlotta," Sam said.


	52. Chapter 52

_Algebra_

"Sam! We just went over this!" Freddie exclaimed. "FOIL means first, outer, inner, last! It doesn't mean _aluminum _foil!"

"I'm hungry," Sam said. "I'm getting some fruit kabobs."

"No! You heard Mr. Howard, if you don't pass this test you'll fail algebra!"

"And?"

"Sam, if you fail the class then you won't get to prom or the grad trip."

"I don't care about the lame prom," Sam shrugged.

"Well too bad, I rented the tux and booked the limo."

"Then I guess you're going alone Fredump," Sam said. "Because I'm perfectly fine failing algebra. It's not like you use it in the real world anyway."

"You'd really make your boyfriend go to prom alone?"

"You'd really make your girlfriend do math?"

"All right, I'll go by myself," Freddie said. "I just hope I can stay clear of those three girls that asked me to the prom last week…I told them I had a girlfriend but they still seemed pretty eager to-"

"Shut up," Sam snapped, kicking Freddie in the shin. "I'll study this stupid algebra chiz. But I won't like it."

"I don't ask that you do," Freddie smiled. "By the way, you know I'd never go with any other girl to prom, right?"  
"I know, you're too madly in love with me."

"So modest," Freddie laughed, rolling his eyes. "And fyi, Carly told me you already picked out your prom dress weeks ago; sounds like you're pretty psyched for the 'lame' prom. Psyched enough to try to pass algebra, which is why you studied for two hours last night without even a ham break."

"Carly!" Sam exclaimed, running upstairs to cause her best friend some serious pain.


	53. Chapter 53

_Bye_

"I'll be back in three months," Freddie said to Sam as they stood in the airport, his arms wrapped around her.

"I know," Sam said.

"We'll talk every night."

"But we're going to be so far, though. You're going to Cal Tech., and I'm going to New York for dance school…"

"There's no way any girl in California would ever compare to you," Freddie said.

"Obviously. And I'm pretty sure you're the only guy in the nation who'd put up with me and my antics."

Freddie smiled. He knew this was untrue; many guys would gladly date Sam, but he knew she wouldn't give them the time of day.

"I'm still going to miss you, though," Sam said softly. "Even if you're a total nub who's obsessed with technology and sci-fi movies."

"I'll miss you too," Freddie laughed. "Even though you're a crazy demon with an insane appetite."

The final boarding call for Freddie's plane sounded over the intercom.

"I have to go," he said sadly, leaning in for one final kiss with his girlfriend.

"Bye."

"Bye."


	54. Chapter 54

_Travel_

"Sam! I've missed you so much!" Carly exclaimed, running to give her best friend a hug. "How's New York? Are you a famous dancer yet? Are you going to be on Broadway?"

"Chill out, Carls, you've asked me every one of those questions last night when we talked. The answers haven't changed over night."

"I know," Carly smiled. "I've just missed having my meat-lovin' best friend around my apartment 24/7. You up for a trip to Build-A-Bra for old times sake?"

"Can we go tomorrow?" Sam yawned. "I just traveled across the country. I'm exhausted."

"Yeah, sure. I'm guessing you want dinner before you sleep, though?"

"You know me well, Carlotta," Sam grinned. "After a long day of travel, there's nothing I want more than twenty pounds of meat products."

As Carly headed to the fridge to get the food, Sam's phone went off.

"No way!" Sam said, jumping up. "Freddie's plane got in early; he just landed!"

"Really? That's-"

"I'm gonna go meet him at the airport," Sam said, grabbing her jacket as she flew out the door.

"You know I'd be offended if you weren't such a cute couple!" Carly called after her.

….

AN- So school's starting and unfortunately, that means these daily updates are most likely not going to last much longer…I'll still try to update as frequently as possible, at least twice a week, though, so don't worry about that. Thanks for reading


	55. Chapter 55

_Tomato_

"Guess what I just bought?" Sam said excitedly, dragging a huge bag into the iCarly studio.

"Sam, I swear, if that's more Mexican yo-yos I'm going to-"

"No, those got banned last month," Sam said. "I got these!" She opened the bag, and hundreds of tomatoes spilled out.

"Okay. Why?"

"My mom's dating a farmer this week," she explained. "He brought us all this food last night."

"So you're going to sit here and stuff your face with tomatoes?" Carly asked, rolling her eyes.

"No. I already ate two dozen." She pulled a large bull's-eye out of the bag. "Mama's gonna work on her aim."

"You better clean up when you're done."

"Ha!"

Carly frowned. She turned to leave the studio just as Freddie walked in.

"Please make sure your girlfriend doesn't kill anything with those," she told him.

"I can't make any promises," Freddie said.

"Bull's-eye!" Sam said happily as the tomato she threw landed smack in the middle of her target.

"Can I try?" Freddie asked.

"No."

"Whatever," he shrugged. "I just came up here to check something on the site anyway."

He headed over to his computer cart and began typing on his laptop. Suddenly, a huge tomato hit him square in the chest.

"Sam!"

"Sorry. Your chest looked like a bull's-eye."

She proceeded to throw another tomato, which hit him in the face.  
"That's it," he said, wiping the red goo off his face. He ran over to the bag, grabbed three tomatoes and hurled them at Sam.

"Benson! You're dead!" Sam yelled, retaliating by throwing one towards an area she knew would cause Freddie maximum pain. Sure enough, he fell to the ground, but not before he threw two more tomatoes at the blonde.

Within ten minutes the huge bag of tomatoes was gone, and the iCarly studio was covered with red goo.

Somewhere within the epic battle, the couple had begun making out, which is what they were doing when Carly came up.

"This is the third time this month!" Carly yelled, causing the two to pull apart. "First it was ice-cream, then it was gravy, now this. Get the mop!"


	56. Chapter 56

_Planning_

"Okay, so I've got the seating arrangements done for the reception, the flowers ordered and the DJ booked," Carly said, looking at her checklist. "Am I the best maid of honor or what?"

"You're terrific, Carls," Sam said, not looking up from her ham. "But crazy. The wedding's not for two months. Why are you planning all this now?"

"Because, Sam, weddings are the biggest moment of a person's life," Carly said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Why aren't you more pumped? If _I _were getting married I'd be dancing every day until the wedding!"

"Uh-huh," Sam nodded. "You're going to be some bride, aren't you?"

"And lucky you get to be _my _maid of honor," she grinned. "Okay, so I have some tablecloth colors I need you to look at, and then we'll go over centerpieces."

Sam moaned.

"Samantha Joy Puckett," Carly playfully scolded her best friend. "I am going to make sure yours and Freddie's wedding is the best wedding in the history of weddings, and if that means planning out every tiny microscopic detail, then so be it! You should be crazy planning too, you know, you _are_ the bride."

"I've planned," Sam defended. "I picked out the menu for the reception, didn't I?"

"Yes, and I'm sure everyone will love the endless pork," Carly said. "But Sam, even if I have to drag you, you're getting your dress picked out this weekend because I-"

"I decided on it last night," Sam said, tossing Carly a magazine. "The one of page 229."

"Wow, it's beautiful," Carly said, staring at the long white dress with lace top.

"So there, I'm done," Sam said proudly, stuffing more ham in her mouth.

"Oh no you're not," Carly said, putting the magazine aside. "We still have to book the minister, go over the playlist, pick your hairstyle, pick the bridesmaid dresses, figure out how many cops we need to control your family during the ceremony-"

"You're trying to kill me, aren't you?"

"I'll tell you what," Carly laughed. "You come with me to look at bridesmaid dresses and we'll stop by the bakery to look at wedding cakes. They give you tons of samples…"

"Let's go, Shay!" Sam said, jumping up. "Let's get this wedding planning chiz done with!"


	57. Chapter 57

_Seven_

There were seven reasons why Sam Puckett hated Freddie Benson:

He was a nub.

He was obsessed with Sci-Fi stuff.

He _enjoyed_ doing schoolwork.

He was a nub.

He used big words too frequently.

He had a crazy, over-protective mother.

And lastly, he was a nub.

There were seven reasons why Freddie Benson hated Sam Puckett:

She was aggressive.

She stole his food on a daily basis.

She made it her sole duty to humiliate him at every chance.

She was aggressive.

She was lazy.

She insulted him at least three times every hour.

And last but not least, she was aggressive.

But there were also seven reasons why Sam Puckett and Freddie Benson loved each other:

They loved they way the others lips felt against theirs.

Sam occasionally let Freddie beat her at arm wrestling. It wasn't much, but she likes seeing him so happy.

They both grew up without dads, so they understood how the other felt every June, when they had no one to celebrate Father's Day with.

They loved the sparks when they kissed.

Sam kept Freddie on his toes, and Freddie kept Sam at bay.

Freddie was the only boy Sam had ever dated for more than a month, and Sam was the only girl Freddie had ever dated for more than a month.

And finally, Sam thought Freddie was an amazing kisser, and Freddie thought the same of Sam.


	58. Chapter 58

_Wrong_

"Is!"

"Isn't!"

"Is!"

"Isn't!"

"You guys!" Carly exclaimed, walking over to Sam and Freddie, who were having yet another argument. "Can you two be civil for ten minutes?"

"Sam won't admit that she's wrong," Freddie said, crossing his arms. "When it's so obvious that she is."

"Mama's never wrong, nub," Sam said. "You should know that by now."

"What's this argument about?" Carly sighed, rolling her eyes.

"Sam said that Ginger Fox is Canadian," Freddie said. "When anyone could tell you that she was born in Florida."

"First of all, this is completely pointless," Carly said, frustrated. "Second, there's a computer right there. Why don't you two just look it up?"

"Good idea, Carls," Freddie said, walking towards the computer. He pulled up . "Wait, before we start, should we bet the usual?"

"Not the pants thing," Carly pleaded.

"Don't worry, Carly," Sam said, as Freddie held out his hand. "We got a new usual. Alright, nub. I'll take your bet." She licked her hand and shook his, as she always did.

"Alright," Freddie said as he typed the question into the search engine. "But I'm going to look forward to-Oh, no."

"Ha!" Sam exclaimed triumphantly. "See, it says it! Ginger Fox was born on February 3rd, 1979 in Ontario, _Canada_!"

"But-I-"

"I win, Fredburger," Sam grinned. "Pay up."

"Please tell me this won't involve blood," Carly sighed. "You two are a couple now, can't you two just not argue for one day?"

"As if," Sam said. "And don't worry, Carls. There's no blood."

"I can't believe she's Canadian," Freddie muttered as he rolled up his sleeves, revealing his now large muscles. "Alright, Sam, do it."

"What's going on?" Carly asked slowly as Sam pulled out a permanent marker from her pocket.

"Our new usual is that the loser of the bet has to have both our names drawn on in permanent ink and wear it for a day."

"That's not so bad," Carly reasoned as Sam began to write out the names.

"Are you kidding?" Freddie said. "My mom's going to have a conniption!"

"Yeah, and walking around with his name on me is just like broadcasting to the world I'm dating a nub," Sam said.

"So you basically made the bet so that the other would be miserable," Carly said.

"Yup," the couple nodded.

"You two are insane. Only you guys would do something like this."

"It was Sam's idea," Freddie pointed out. "Of course, we all know she just wanted a reason to touch my biceps."

"Please," Sam spat at him. "There's nothing there to touch except you squishy, useless arm."

"Uh-huh, then why have you been squeezing my muscle for the past five minutes?"

Sam kicked him, but she still couldn't hide that fact that both her cheeks had reddened.


	59. Chapter 59

_Pouring_

"So you see how the male elephant is offering the female a peanut?" Spencer said to Freddie as the two sat on the couch, watching the Nature Channel. "That means he's-"

"Is there anything else on?" Freddie exclaimed.

"Just a bunch of cooking channels and that show about those kids in a tree house," Spencer replied.

"Man, Carly's lucky," Freddie sighed. "They probably have better shows on right now in Yakima."

"Yeah, probably," Spencer yawned. "Well, since you turned off my elephants, I'm going to go take a nap. Do you see the cereal?"

"Why do you need cereal to-"

"Got it!" Spencer said happily, grabbing a box of fiber nuts from the counter, and with that, he retreated back to his room.

Freddie rolled his eyes and grabbed his laptop. He had just begun making a few changes to the iCarly site when the door flew open and a soaking wet Sam walked in.

"Sam! Why are you wet?" Freddie asked, jumping up to see his girlfriend.

"Because," Sam snapped. "It's pouring out! Haven't you looked out the window recently?"

Freddie turned to look out the window and saw that it was, indeed, pouring down rain.

"Oh."

"I missed the stupid bus, so I had to walk here," Sam continued, ringing out her drenched hair.

"Here," Freddie said, taking off his jacket and draping it over Sam. "You must be freezing."

"No chiz," Sam said.

"Okay," Freddie said. "Why don't you go get some dry clothes from Carly's room and I'll make you some hot soup?"

"Whatever," Sam mumbled as she started up the stairs.

Freddie grabbed a can of Sam's favorite soup, Chunky Meat, from the cabinet, and poured it into a pot. He had just finished heating it up when Sam came down, dressed in a pair of Carly's jeans and one of her Penny T's that read Frosted Chimp on it. She still had Freddie's jacket on.

"Here," he said, sliding the bowl of soup in front of her. "Eat it before you get a cold."

"When did you turn into my wife?" Sam said, shaking her head. But she took the soup anyway.

"You know," Freddie said, grinning. "Now that you're in dry clothes, there really isn't a reason for you to be wearing my jacket anymore, is there?"

Sam shrugged. "I'm keeping it."

"Uh-huh. You're not afraid of it being infested with cooties or anything?"

"Believe me, nub," Sam said. "If I were afraid of your cooties, we wouldn't be doing much of this."

She leaned over across the counter and kissed his lips briefly.

"No," Freddie smiled. "I guess not."

"So it's settled. I'm keeping the jacket."

"Um, how did that settle that?" Freddie asked.

Sam shot him a glance.

"Oh yeah," he said weakly. "That's how."


	60. Chapter 60

_Scientist_

"Oh, he's so getting kicked off," Carly said as the last contestant on America Sings performed.

"What? No way, Joe Parker is going all the way!" Sam exclaimed.

"Yeah, sure," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Hey, when's Freddie getting home from work?"

"Not for another hour; he works late on Wednesdays," Sam replied. "You wanna order pizza? I'm too lazy to cook."

"Sure," Carly smiled. "I want pineapple on my part."

"That's disgusting," Sam grimaced. "Jason! Come here!"

Jason, Sam and Freddie's five-year old son, came running into the living room. "Yeah mommy?"

"I'm going to order pizza. What kind do you want?"

"Meat Supreme!" the boy cried happily. "Like you, mommy!"

"That's my boy!" Sam grinned high fiving her son.

"Momma, I need help on my homework," Jason said. "Can you help me?"

"Since when do kindergardners have homework?" Carly frowned.

"His teacher's a nut," Sam mumbled. "Okay, Jason, bring it here."

Sam quickly called in to order the pizza, and by the time she finished, Jason had returned with a worksheet and pencil.

"I can't read some of the words," Jason said, settling himself into his mother's lap.

"Alright," Sam said, taking the worksheet from him. "It says you're supposed to write about the career you want to have when you get older."

"What's a career?"

"It's a job," Sam explained. "Like, daddy has a career as a developer for the Pear Company."

"Ohhhh. And you and Aunt Carly have a career as T.V. ladies?"

"We _write_ for the T.V.," Sam corrected him. "So, any idea what career you want to do?"

"I dunno…"

"You don't have to make a _real_ decision. Just write something down so that whackjob teacher will give you credit."

"Sam!" Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"I know!" Jason exclaimed. "I want to be a scientist!"

"A scientist?" Sam repeated.

"Yeah! I love science. I always watch Phil Rye, the Science Fellow on T.V., and I always look at my Perioc Table before I go to sleep."

"You mean _Periodic_," Carly said, earning her a death glare from Sam.

"How do you spell 'scientist'?" Jason asked taking the paper back from his mother.

"Um, S-C-I-E-N-T-I-S-T," Sam said reluctantly.

"Thanks, mommy," Jason said happily, hopping off Sam's lap. "I'm going to go play with my chemistry set!"

"Aw, he's adorable," Carly smiled.

"Yeah, and Freddie's corrupted him," Sam sighed. "I swear, I'm going to kill that nub…"

…

Freddie unlocked the front door to his and Sam's home. "Sam?" he called, tossing his bag aside. "Oh, there you are."

"Yeah, here I am," Sam said putting down the piece of pie she was about to eat and began advancing on her husband.

"Um, did I do something?" Freddie asked, frowning. "Because whatever it is, I'm sorry."

"You," Sam said, whacking Freddie's head. "Have turned our son into a-a-I can't even say it!"

"I'm lost," Freddie said. "What's going on with Jason?"

"He had to write down what career he wanted when he got older today," Sam said. "And do you know what he picked? Scientist!"

"Really?" Freddie said happily. "Alright!"

"Ah! You've destroyed him!"

"Sam," Freddie laughed. "Don't you think you're over reacting?"

"No, I don't," she snapped. "My precious little baby boy is going to grow up to be…you!"

"Oh come on," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "First of all, I am _slightly _offended. Second, Jason's way more like you than me. I mean do you see the way he eats? Plus you have to practically tear him away from the wrestling channel."

"Yeah, that's true," Sam nodded. "But still, you've been plotting to do this since before he was born, haven't you."

"Yes, Sam," Freddie said sarcastically. "While you were pregnant with him I secretly planned to mold him to my every desire."

"I knew it!"

"Okay," Freddie said, shaking his head. "Sam, is it _really_ that big a deal if Jason likes science like me? I mean, I turned out okay."

"Ha!"

"What?" Freddie grinned. "You don't think I'm 'okay'?"

"Eh."

"Sam!"

"Fine, whatever," Sam exclaimed. "I guess it isn't _that _bad if Jason likes science like you. But I'm still taking him to those karate classes. If he's going to have your brain, he's at least going to have _my _fists."


	61. Chapter 61

_Rent_

"Sam," Freddie said, unlocking the door to the apartment him and Sam were renting. "Where are you?"

"In here!" Sam yelled from the their bedroom.

"So I was just downstairs in the lobby," Freddie said, walking into the bedroom, where Sam was lying on their bed watching T.V.. "And the super said he didn't get the rent last month. I told him that was impossible, but he still says we owe him."

"Yeah…that's really weird," Sam said, avoiding Freddie's eyes.

"Sam," Freddie frowned. "You did give him the check last month, right?"

"Of course I did!" Sam snapped. "I can't believe you'd even suggest that I didn't!"

Freddie rolled his eyes. He wasn't buying this. He knew that it would be hard to get Sam to admit it, but after being with her for years, he had become accustom to some new methods.

"Sam," he said pulling her up. "You know where I just came from?"

"No…"

"Louisiana Fried Chicken. I have a bucket out in the car, and I'll go get it…if you tell me the truth."

"I am telling you the truth, Fredpus, and don't you dare tease me with meat! Now go out to your car and get that bucket before I do a double fist dance on your face!"

"You can't do that if you want," Freddie shrugged. "You still won't have your chicken."

Sam narrowed her eyes. "You're asking for it."

Freddie raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms.

"Fine," Sam said exasperated. "I took the rent money to buy something really cool."

"Sam," Freddie sighed. "You do realize that you can't just chose _not_ to pay rent. We could get kicked out and-"

"Calm down, I was going to go give him another check tomorrow," Sam said.

"You're unbelievable," Freddie said, shaking his head. "You know that? Now, what did you buy? It better be something pretty darn good."

"It is," Sam grinned, jumping off the bed. She ran to the closet and pulled out a box. She opened it up and took out a remote control car and a build-able racetrack.

"That thing is for kids, Sam!" Freddie exclaimed, watching, slightly amused as Sam began to build the track on the floor. She ignored him and placed the car on the track.

"I'm next," Freddie said, sitting down to Sam.

…..

AN- idate sam and Freddie tonight? YES!


	62. Chapter 62

_Ink_

"Sam, no," Carly sighed in frustration. "The carpals are not in your neck, they're in your wrist! And you labeled this guy's femur as his nose!"

"This is pointless, okay?" Sam exclaimed, throwing her pen down. "It's not like I'm going to become a doctor!"

"Well, yeah, but it's still important," Carly said. "For you know, when you…want to perform surgery on yourself."

"I'm going to get some pudding," Sam said, walking to the fridge.

"Here's your problem," Carly said, looking through Sam's notebook. "You don't take any notes! What do you do during Ms. Schnider's lectures?"

"Well yesterday I drew all the characters from _Girly Cow_ wearing bunny ears."

"I see," Carly laughed, turning to the page Sam described. "Hey, what's this down here?"

"Don't go through that!" Sam said, running over to Carly.

Even through Sam was faster and stronger than Carly and managed to get her notebook back from her in a matter of seconds, Carly was still able to see what Sam had scrawled down in her notebook.

"You wrote Freddie's name like twenty times," she said, grinning, as Sam stuffed her notebook back into her backpack.

"Shut up," Sam said, turning red.

"Surrounded by hearts-"

"Okay! Just don't say anything to him," Sam said loudly.

"Oh come on," Carly said. "It's cute, and Freddie knows you _love_ him, you two _are_ dating."

"Yeah, but I'm not going to tell him that," Sam said. "That's for soft, weak girls…like you."

"Well guess what?" Carly said, slightly offended at Sam's last comment. "You wrote that down in ink."

"So?"

"So, no matter how hard you try to claim you've never indicated any love for Freddie," Carly smiled. "The proof is going to be right there in your notebook."

"What if I rip up the page?" Sam said.

"Are you?" Carly asked knowingly.

Sam looked at the ground. "No."

"Don't worry," Carly said. "I won't say anything, but trust me, I don't have to. Like I said, Freddie already knows."


	63. Chapter 63

_Chewing_

Sam and Freddie were sitting on the Shay's couch, watching a movie from Spencer's Pay-Per-View. Carly and Spencer had gone out to dinner, leaving the couple alone in the apartment.

"I love this part," Freddie said, watching the screen.

"This is such a dumb movie," Sam said, rolling her eyes, snapping her bubble gum.

"Shh! This is the part when the robot finds out that the android is really against him!"

"Uh-huh," Sam said boardly, chewing her gum loudly. "I still say we should've watched that fight."

"This is so much better!"

"No, it's stupid. I can't even follow it!"

"Well how can you even hear over your loud chewing? I swear, you're doing that just to bug me!"

"So what if I am?" she grinned.

"Well then quit it."

"Nope," Sam said, leaning over and snapping her gum in his ear.

"Sam! Stop!"

"You gave me the gum."

"I didn't know you were too immature for it!"

"Me immature? Ha!"

"Mature people know how to chew gum without making their boyfriends want to tear off their ears."

"First of all, I'd _love_ to see you tear off your ears," Sam said. "Second of all, I'm going to keep chewing this piece of gum forever, so get used to it."

"You can't chew that gum forever," Freddie said. "It'll lose its flavor eventually."

"I don't care."

"Okay, but how are you supposed to eat ham with gum in your mouth?"

Sam frowned.

"Ahha," Freddie grinned. 'Got you on that one, don't I?"

"I'll-I'll- fine, I'd spit it out for ham, but since Carly and Spencer finished their ham, there's none here, so we don't have that problem."

"How are we supposed to kiss?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"What makes you think I want to kiss you?"

"I dunno, maybe the fact that you practically attacked my face the second Carly and Spencer left," he pointed out.

"I can kiss you with gum in my mouth."

"No, remember you tried that before and wound up chocking on it?"

"Oh yeah…"

"But since you're not spitting it out," Freddie continued. "We won't get to kiss, so you won't have to worry about-"

He was interrupted by Sam pressing her lips to his.

"Wait, what did you do with your-" he started as he pulled away after a minute. Then he felt something soft and squishy in his ear.


	64. Chapter 64

_Focus_

"And that is why the green light is such a significant symbol," Ms. Briggs lectured her English class. "Now then, moving onto motifs…"

Freddie shook his head. English wasn't exactly his favorite class, but he usually managed to pay attention to Ms. Briggs. Now, though, he felt his mind slipping. He looked around the class and his eyes landed on the back of his girlfriend, Sam's, head.

He stared at her golden locks thrown across her shoulders. She didn't seem to be paying attention, either. She was drawing in a notebook, completely ignoring Ms. Briggs. He craned his neck to see what she was drawing. He saw a doodle of what looked like her, and then another one that looked like him, surrounded by what he could've sworn were hearts. He grinned. He knew Sam would never admit to drawing this picture, so he was glad he got to see it, even in secret.

"Fredward Benson!" Ms. Briggs shouted, breaking Freddie out of his daze.

"Um, yes?"

"I asked you a question, and I'm waiting for your answer."

"Oh…um, false?"

"Yes," Ms. Briggs snapped sarcastically. "The object of Mr. Gatsby's desires is false."

The class snickered and Freddie felt himself turning red.

"Mr. Benson, perhaps if you actually paid attention to what I was staying instead of staring across the room at goodness knows what, you would actually be able to answer a question competently!"

"Sorry," Freddie mumbled.

"I'm sure you're not. Anyway, back to what I was saying…"

Freddie slid down in his seat. He looked back over at Sam one last time, and saw that she was staring back at him, grinning.


	65. Chapter 65

_Coincidence_

Freddie had always thought his meeting Sam was a horrible coincidence.

His mom just happened to get a job in Seattle, and he just happened to move into the only building with an available apartment, Bushwell Plaza, where Carly Shay just so happened to live right across from him.

Carly just so happened to have a blonde best friend named Sam Puckett who she insisted that he meet.

Carly dragged him into her apartment where he saw, for the first time, the blonde girl sitting on the couch, eating a bag of pork rinds watching T.V.

He said hello, and she threw the remote at him.

Everyday after that Sam threw insult after insult at him and punch after punch at him, and would curse his luck that he had moved to this apartment building of all buildings, where Sam Puckett practically lived.

As the years went on, though, Freddie was able to take Sam's insults and punches with less emotional damage.

He began to notice that Sam had more to her than an aggressive manner and endless pit of a stomach.

He thought maybe it was a coincidence that neither of them had had their first kiss at fourteen, and therefore had practically no choice but to share it with the other.

Maybe it was a coincidence that they both always found themselves alone at the Shay's when they couldn't handle being at home anymore. Maybe it was a coincidence that they both never seemed to find luck in any relationship they had.

Now, though, as Freddie lay in his bed next to his sleeping wife; her blonde curls spread across her pillow and her breathing steady, he realized his meeting Sam was not a coincidence; it was fate.

If he never met Sam, he would've never known what love felt like, and he knew he would never have been as happy as he was now.


	66. Chapter 66

_Direction_

"Okay, it says we're supposed to go left at that-Sam! No! I said left!"

"This way's quicker," Sam told Freddie as she did a u-turn.

"How do you know?"

"Relax, I know where I'm going," Sam said. "And unlike those crummy directions you downloaded, I won't take ten years to get there."

"Sam, I really think we should just stick to the directions," Freddie said. "Carly will kill us if we're late for her dad's coming home surprise party."

"We'll get there, calm down," Sam said.

"This doesn't look like the city Carly described," Freddie sighed.

"If you do not shut up, I'm going to hit you so hard that-"

"Sam!" Freddie exclaimed, jolting upright in his seat. "This is Canada!"

The couple stared at the large sign that welcomed drivers into Canada.

"Oh," Sam mumbled.

"Great," Freddie said. "The party starts in twenty minutes and we're three hours away!"

"Let me call Carly and tell her we'll be late," Sam said, grabbing her phone from her bag. She tried to dial Carly's number, but her screen went black. "Um, my battery just died…"

"Oh, no big deal, let me just call Carly on my phone. Oh, wait," he said sarcastically. "I can't, because _somebody_ super glued it to a ceiling fan. You know Sam, having you for a girlfriend really gets my blood pressure into the danger zone!"

"Maybe that's because you overreact about everything!"

"Overreact? When somebody walks into a room to find their girlfriend trying to train a coyote to fetch, they typically react badly!"

"What about the time that you nearly had a heart attack because we were _five_ minutes late to see the new _Galaxy Wars_ movie?"

"You knew how badly I wanted to see that movie! You made us late on purpose!"

"So what, you think I just plan to sabotage you? Is that it?" Sam yelled.

"Seems like it!" Freddie retorted.

Sam blinked, and then turned her head away towards the window.

"Sam," Freddie sighed, instantly feeling bad about what he just said. "Come on, baby, I didn't mean that."

Sam didn't respond.

"Sam," Freddie tried again, placing his hand on her shoulder, but she shook it off.

"I'm sorry I said that," Freddie said sincerely. "I was just frustrated."

Sam still didn't respond.

"I know you don't plan to sabotage me," Freddie continued. "In fact, you never do. You're a _wonderful_ girlfriend, Sam. Like, remember that time you stayed up all night with me working on that app to submit to the Pear Company? Or that time you punched that guy in the stomach for keying my car? Or what about that time you gave up going to that ham eating contest where you could've won a lifetime supply of free meat to stay with me in the hospital after I got my appendix taken out?"

Sam slowly looked at Freddie. "You mean that?"

"Absolutely," Freddie nodded. "Sure, you make life a little…interesting at times, but I wouldn't trade that for anything."


	67. Chapter 67

_Accounting_

"Sam?" Carly called as she walked into her best friend's home. "You home?"

"Yeah, I'm in the kitchen," Sam replied.

"What're you doing?" Carly asked, seeing Sam working on a laptop with piles of papers spread out around her.

"Paying my stupid bills…do I even _have_ this much money?"

"Um, doesn't Freddie usually pay your bills?" Carly frowned. "He _was _president of the Yong Businessmen's club back in high school."

"Yeah, but the stupid nub thinks that I can't handle this! Ha!"

"Um, I'm pretty sure you just placed half of your son's college fund into another account," Carly pointed out.

"Oh," Sam said blankly, staring at the screen. "Eh, Jason's a smart kid; he'll get scholarships."

"Sam, please do not submit anything," Carly begged. "Because if you send it the way it is now, I'm pretty sure you'll be 50,000 dollars in debt."

"I'm _not_ asking Freddie for help, if that's where you're going."

"Sam-"

"Hey, do you think it would matter if I just send half the mortgage payment? Maybe they won't notice…"

….

"Hey, I'm home," Freddie said, taking off his jacket as he walked in the door. "Sorry I'm late; my boss spilled coffee on his laptop and I had to help him recover some files."

"Hey," Sam greeted him, giving him a quick peck on the lips. "We saved you some dinner; it's on the stove."

"Cool. Kids asleep?"

"Yup," Sam nodded.

"So, what did you do all day?"

"Um, nothing," Sam said quickly. "Just stayed home. Actually, I'm really tired; think I'll head up to bed."

"All right, I'll be up in a minute," Freddie said.

Sam went upstairs and Freddie sat down to eat. Just as he was about to take a bite of his chicken, though, he noticed Sam's laptop sitting on the counter with a blinking light indicating that it was still on.

Figuring he would turn it off for her, Freddie opened the laptop, and saw the family's banking statements pop up on the screen. He scanned the page and almost had a heart attack. He knew Sam said she was going to do the bills this month, but he wasn't prepared for this! Fortunately, he saw that Sam hadn't sent them yet. He quickly fixed the numbers, then gulped down his dinner and headed upstairs.

"Sam," Freddie said, going into their bedroom. "You remember when you told me that you were going to take care of paying our bills from now on and said, and I quote, "I'll be ten times better than you, Benson"?"

"Um, yes," Sam nodded, fidgeting with the corner of her sheets. "And I will be better-"

"You left the bank statement up on your computer," Freddie told her, grinning. "And let me just say that I'm very impressed….with your numbers, we're approximately 73,821 dollars in debt."

"You probably just read it wrong," Sam snapped. "And keep your hands off my computer!"

"Come on, baby, admit it; you suck at it!"

"Say that again; I dare you."

"What's the big deal? I don't mind paying the bills," Freddie said, sitting down on the bed next to his wife.

"The big deal is that now you think that I'm too stupid to handle something as simple as moving a few numbers around!"

"I don't think," Freddie said. "I'm sure if you'd taken Accounting classes in high school like I did you'd be fine. But Sam, you do a ton of things around here that I would fail miserably at and I've accepted that."

"Like what?"

"Like managing your job as a script writer _and_ taking care of the four kids during the day," Freddie said. "Honestly, those times I have to watch them when you go to those conventions I think I'm going to pull my hair out."

"Yeah, you are pretty weak," Sam shrugged.

"And you make enough food to feed an army; I've never been hungry once in our thirteen years of marriage."

"You know that's just because I love to eat. But I get it; I'm brilliant."

"Yeah, you are," Freddie grinned. "Just promise me one thing."

"What?"

"Never touch our bills again."


	68. Chapter 68

_Officer_

Freddie stormed into the Shay's apartment, followed by Sam.

"Wow, somebody doesn't look too happy," Carly remarked, looking at the expression of Freddie's face. "What's up?"

"What's up?" Freddie repeated. "You want to know what's up? I got a $500 dollar ticket!"

"For what?" Carly frowned as Sam headed to the fridge.

"He's overreacting," Sam said, rolling her eyes as she grabbed a can of Peppy Cola. "It's not a big deal; everyone gets a ticket eventually."

"No they don't!" Freddie countered. "Now it's on my license, which my mom will probably take away from me now, and it's all your fault!"

"How's it her fault?" Carly asked, sensing an argument coming.

"I was driving the two of us to pick up the new props for the web show next week," Freddie explained. "We were driving on Commerce Road, and the speed limit was only 55 miles per hour, which apparently wasn't fast enough for Speed Demon over there."

"I was hungry and wanted to get back here so I could eat!" Sam defended.

"Anyway," Freddie continued. "Sam reached her foot over to the gas pedal and stepped on it and made us go at least 80! We almost crashed into a bus!"

"Almost," Sam pointed out.

"So of course we got pulled over by a cop," Freddie said. "And at first, it seemed like he was just going to let me off with a warning, since it was my first offence. But then Sam just had to go and mess that up."

"What did you do?" Carly asked hesitantly.

"The guy's name was Officer Gasbeanie," Sam smiled. "I _had_ to make fun of that."

"Which is how I ended up with my first speeding ticket," Freddie said, crossing his arms.

"Fine, whatever, I'm sorry I got you a ticket," Sam said, patting Freddie's shoulder. "You want me to get you the money? Because my Uncle Carmine who just got out of prison know a guy who-"

"Yeah, that's smart, Sam," Freddie said sarcastically. "Pay off a speeding ticket with illegal money. Do you _want_ me to be locked up?"

Sam shrugged. "It might be good for your character."

"Sam!"

"What? It's not like I wouldn't visit you!"

"Guys!" Carly exclaimed. "Enough! Look, you don't want to fight about this. Yes, Sam it's not nice to nearly cause a car crash and then make Freddie get a ticket, and Freddie, you should know by now that you _always_ have food in the car for situations like that, but I don't think you guys need to be so angry with each other. You're a couple for crying out loud! You need to-"

"Hang on," Freddie said slowly. "This isn't mine _or _Sam's fault. It's yours!"

"What?" Carly frowned.

"Yeah, he's right," Sam nodded. "If _you_ didn't make _us_ go pick up the stupid props, we never would've been in that situation in the first place!"

"Well, I-"

"And didn't she say the reason she couldn't go was because she had a huge test to study for?" Freddie asked. "She's on the computer watching clips of _Full House_!"

"I-I-"

"I'm sorry I yelled at you," Freddie said to Sam, holding her hand. "It wasn't your fault."

"And I'm sorry I caused the cop to give you a ticket," Sam smiled.

"Guys-" Carly said weakly as the couple grinned at one another and headed out of the apartment hand in hand.

Carly shook her head. She would _never_ understand the workings of those two.


	69. Chapter 69

_Present_

"Spencer!" Carly yelled, walking into her brother's loft. "Spencer, where are you?"

"What? What's going on? What?" Spencer exclaimed, running into the living room wearing nothing but his cow boxers and holding a gallon of orange juice.

"Um, why are you- never mind. I need your help."

"Sure kiddo, what's up?"

"What did you get Sam and Freddie for their wedding?"

"What's this?" Spencer grinned. "Carly Shay, the Queen of Gift Giving is having trouble picking out a wedding present for her two best friends?"

"Stop rubbing it in," Carly snapped. "I just spent three hours at the mall looking, and I found nothing. The wedding's in one week and I still don't have their wedding present!"

"Well I decided to finally give them my secret spaghetti taco recipe," Spencer said. "Those two have been trying to get me to tell them for years what I put in my sauce."

"Aw, that's sweet," Carly smiled. "Too bad I don't have anything like that."

"You'll think of something," Spencer said, rustling her hair.

….

"Presents!" Sam exclaimed, running into her and Freddie's new living room. The couple had just gotten back from their honeymoon in Hawaii. They had left right from their wedding reception, so Carly had taken the liberty of unloading all the wedding gifts into the house for them to open when they got back.

"Calm down, Sam," Carly laughed as Sam eagerly began looking through the large pile, searching out the biggest package.

"Carls, this was all she was talking about on the plane ride back," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"I'm not surprised," Carly said. "Well, okay. Open mine first though, you guys!"

She handed Sam and Freddie a rectangular package wrapped in shiny purple wrapping paper. Sam and Freddie, well, mainly Sam, ripped off the paper to reveal a digital picture frame.

"Turn it on," Carly told them.

Freddie pressed the power button, and immediately a picture of Sam and Freddie when they were eleven years old flashed onto the frame.

"That's when we first met," Sam whispered.

"Yup," Freddie grinned. "I had just moved in across from Carly. I introduced myself to you and you gave me a wedgie."

"And there's us after the first iCarly," Sam smiled.

"And here we are in Japan."

"And there's me handcuffed to Gibby."

"There's us getting ready for our first date."

"And there's you proposing to me."

"And that's us at the alter," Freddie said. "Wow, Carly I don't even know what to say."

"You guys are my best friends, don't mention it," Carly said. "Although when I get married, I expect a gift of equal mushiness!"


	70. Chapter 70

_Politeness _

"And see now when you click this button, you get a drop down menu that will take you to all of our videos. And then if you click this link right here-"

"You know, Freddie," Carly said. "Thanks for fixing the site and everything but I _really_ don't care about this."

"Fine, whatever," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "But next time you want updated-"

"Yo, Nub!" Sam yelled, storming into the Shay's apartment.

"Uh-oh, couple trouble," Carly said, walking to her fridge for a can of peppy cola.

"Um, hey?" Freddie said hesitantly.

"So I saw your crazy mom in the elevator on the way up here," Sam said crossing her arms.

"Oh God," Freddie sighed. "What did she do?"

"She gave me this!" Sam exclaimed, pulling a pamphlet out of her jacket pocket and thrusting it at him.

"Politeness lessons?" Freddie frowned, reading the pamphlet. "They have those?"

"Apparently! She said that she signed her and me up for some classes next weekend so we could 'bond' and teach me to be a lady! Do something!"

"What do you want me to do? You know she's stubborn with these things; she's not going to change her mind."

"I'm not going," Sam said firmly.

"Oh come on, Sam, I think it'd be good for you and Mrs. Benson to bond," Carly said.

"Did _you_ bond with her when you and Freddie went out?"

"Um, no…but Freddie and I only dated for like two weeks. You've guys have been together for a year."

"Yeah, I think you two should do it," Freddie nodded.

"I know what this is," Sam said. "You just want me to go to the class. You want me to be more polite!"

"That's…not true," Freddie said lamely.

"It is!"

"Okay, maybe I'd like you to be just a _little_ more polite," Freddie said.

"I'm plenty polite."

Carly snorted into her soda. "Sorry…just, um, thought of a really funny joke."

"Sam, last night when I took you out to dinner you threw your chicken at the waiter because he brought you diet root beer instead of regular," Freddie pointed out.

"He has to learn!"

"Sam, you made him cry."

Sam looked at the floor. "So?"

"Okay, Sam, I'll make a deal with you," Freddie sighed. "Just go to _one_ lesson with my mom and I'll let you replace all of our gluten free reduced fat food in our kitchen with anything you want…It'll give my mom a heart attack."

Sam considered this. "Fine, I'll go to one class," she decided. "Not that I need it."

She grabbed Carly's half finished can of soda and gulped it down in one swig.

"No, not at all," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.


	71. Chapter 71

_Memory_

Most of the memories Sam has from her early life were less than pleasant.

She could remember her dad saying he was going to the store to buy a loaf of bread, but never coming back. She remembered all the times her mom yelled that she should be more like Melanie. She remembered running away from home when she was six because the twelve-year old girl who lived next door to her kept bullying her. She also remembered that her mom didn't even notice she was gone until the next day. She remembered the day that Melanie told her that she would be attending a fancy boarding school across the country; leaving Sam all alone.

Looking back on more recent memories, though, Sam would actually feel a warm, happier sensation. That reason being, she knew, was because of a certain somebody had entered her life.

Now looking back she would remember her and Freddie's first kiss out on the fire escape; she would remember their first date, and how she took two hours to prepare for it. She would remember him staying up with her for so many nights to help her get her grades up so they could attend the same college after high school, and the look on his face when she told him she got in. She would remember the time Freddie got down on one knee and proposed to her, and the butterflies she got in her stomach when he kissed her after she said yes. She remembered their wedding and their 'I do's', and their honeymoon to Europe, and she remembered the shocked, but ecstatic face of Freddie when she told him that she was pregnant with their first child.

With Freddie in her life, Sam was able to look back at even her oldest memories and smile, because she knew that he would always be there to make new ones.


	72. Chapter 72

_Turning_

"Sam! Wake up!" Carly said, barging into her best friend's bedroom. "Come on, birthday girl."

"Shut. Up." Sam mumbled, burying her head into her pillow.

"Sam, come on, rise and shine," Carly continued, opening the blinds, causing a stream of sunshine to flood the room. "It's not everyday you turn 30."

"Ah! Don't say it!"

"Really, you're still freaking out?" Carly said, rolling her eyes as she yanked the covers off the bed. "Are you still on this? For the last time, 30 isn't old, Sam."

"Yeah? We'll see how you are come July…"

"So where's your husband?" Carly asked, sitting down at the end of the bed, pushing Sam's feet off.

"Shower," she yawned.

"Well hurry up and get dressed. Jason's already up baking your birthday breakfast."

"You left my son by himself in the kitchen?"

"He's not using the stove," Carly assured her. "He's just making the batter for your pancakes."

"Well…I'll eat them but I'm still not celebrating my birthday."

"Sam…" Carly moaned.

Just then the door to the adjoining bathroom door opened and Freddie walked out, drying his hair with a towel, wearing only his boxers.

"Carly!" he exclaimed, surprised to see his friend in his bedroom. He quickly pulled the towel around his waist. "What are you doing here?"

"Trying to get Sam to celebrate her birthday like a normal person," Carly replied.

"Which I'm not going to," Sam said firmly, finally sitting up. "If I don't celebrate it, then I can stay 29, and I won't have to be old."

"I'm not sure that's how it works," Freddie smiled.

"Quiet!"

"Okay, Freddie, I'm leaving her up to you," Carly said, getting up. "I'm going to go see how Jason is doing on those pancakes. But I expect you downstairs in fifteen minutes. You're going to have fun today even if I have to drag you around myself."

"She is just _too_ darn perky," Sam yawned as Carly closed the door behind her.

"Come on, baby," Freddie said, sitting down next to his wife. "Get dressed so we can go eat breakfast and start your birthday."

"Will you stop saying that word?"

"You know, _I _didn't do this when _I _turned 30 back in February," he pointed out.

"Yeah, well, you were already heading downhill," Sam said. "I mean you already have gray hair."

"I have _one_," he said. "And I'm pretty sure I know who caused it."

"Look, I just don't want to turn 30."

"It's just a number," Freddie said, pulling her into a hug.

"Yeah, but it's so…old. I mean, it's only twenty years off from 50, which is half a century..."

"Sam," Freddie sighed. "You're being ridiculous."

"Guess I'm getting senile with age then."

"Babe," he said, looking into her blue eyes. "You want to know something?"

"Sure, why not?"

"No matter how old you get, whether it be 50, 70, or even 130, I'll always love you just like I did when we were teenagers, and when we were in our twenties, and now, when we're in our thirties."

Sam smiled a little. "Imagine us at 130."

"You'll still probably be an aggressive she-demon who can down an entire ham in less than ten minutes."

"And you'll probably still be a tech-obsessed geek who I have the urge to punch every time he opens his mouth."

"Come on," Freddie said, laughing. "We should get downstairs."

"You know," Sam said, looking at the clock at her bedside table. "We still have twelve minutes, according to Carly."

"Yeah, we do," Freddie said as he leaned down to kiss Sam. "Happy birthday, Sam."


	73. Chapter 73

_Division_

Division was something that Sam was never very good at. She remembered when she was eight years old in third grade and the teacher first introduced the concept and how confused she had been at the idea of halves and thirds and she always had to resort to copying Melanie's or Carly's homework.

She didn't like the idea of division even more when it didn't involve numbers, but people instead.

She remembered how she felt when Melanie left for boarding school the next year, it was like she herself was being divided as she watched her other half board the plane that would take her miles away.

And of course, she despised the idea of dividing food. Just the very idea of slicing a ham up into equal pieces to…share…with other people sent shivers up her spine.

Sam could just never grasp why people bothered with division. Why would you want to break up part of a whole anyway? Because then, after all, it wasn't really complete, was it?

Now, years later, she still hated division.

Sure, she eventually got the concept of it in math, but she sill didn't understand why it had to occur in real life too.

When she was with her boyfriend, Freddie, she couldn't imagine being apart from him. She couldn't imagine not being able to string her fingers between his, not being to nuzzle her face in his strong chest, not being able to feel his arms around her or his lips on her.

Any outsider could tell you that Sam and Freddie could not be divided. If you took on half away from the other, they simply weren't the same. They were part of each other, and apart, they couldn't function.


	74. Chapter 74

_Training_

Freddie put down the weights and wiped the sweat from his brow. He had just finished his weekly gym session and was thoroughly exhausted. He grabbed his bag and headed to the locker rooms to shower.

"Hey, you," a voice called behind him. He turned around to see a trainer that worked at the gym.

"Er, hello," Freddie said.

"You've been coming here for about six months now, right?" the trained asked.

"That's about right," Freddie nodded. "Why?"

"Because I've been keeping an eye on you," the trainer replied. "When you first came in here you were so scrawny that me and some others trainers made a bet on how long you would last. But, jeeze man, now you've got some guns of steel!"

"Oh, well thanks," Freddie said, grinning at the compliment.

"So what's your story? Training for a sport? A fight?"

"Um, not exactly," Freddie said slowly, looking at the ground.

"Well then what? Someone doesn't work as hard as you have for no reason…I know! It was for a girl! Ah-ha, it is! You're turning red."

"I guess you could say it's about a girl," Freddie admitted. "Well, I've got to go-"

"Trying to impress her with your muscles," the trainer said, continuing to follow Freddie. "Girls love big muscles. I'll bet she can't keep her hands off you. Probably wrapping her arms all over yours and-"

"I just wanted to beat her at arm wrestling!" Freddie exclaimed finally.

The trainer blinked. "You got beat by a _chick_ in arm wrestling?"

"Hey, she's strong," Freddie defended.

"Well…have you at least beaten her yet?"

"…No."

"Well, look at the time," the trainer said, looking at his bare wrist. "I'm late for…gym stuff."

Freddie rolled his eyes, feeling slightly embarrassed. But he was determined. He was tired having his girlfriend, Sam, beat him at arm wrestling every time. One of these days, he was going to win…Well, probably not, but maybe he'd eventually be able to last a full five seconds against her…someday.


	75. Chapter 75

_Cover_

"We're snowed in!" Sam said, looking out the window the see the streets, lawns and driveways covered in a thick blanket of snow. "I don't think I can even open the front door!"

"You can't be serious!" Carly said, jumping up and running next to her best friend. "How am I going to get home?"

"The guy on the news just said roads probably won't be clear for awhile," Freddie said, turning up the T.V.. "Apparently, we're in the middle of a blizzard."

"You can stay in our guest room, Carls," Sam told her. "Nub, make us some hot chocolate."

"You know," Freddie said, getting up from the couch. "Usually it's the wife who's making the hot chocolate while the husband is chopping wood for the fire."

"When was the last time you even _picked up_ an axe?" Sam said.

Freddie looked down. "I'll be in the kitchen."

"Thanks for letting me stay," Carly said.

"No worries. I figure I owe you for the years I spent practically living at your place."

"True," Carly laughed. "Well, at least the power hasn't gone out yet."

Just as she finished her sentence, the lights dimmed, and then went out completely.

"That was scary ironic," Sam said. "Freddie! Where are the flashlights?"

"Third drawer in the T.V. stand," he called from the kitchen. "Now aren't you glad I took the time to organize all of our emergency items?"

"Just get me my hot chocolate!"

Sam grabbed a flashlight and flicked it on. "Crab…I can already feel it getting cold."

"Light the fire," Freddie said, coming out with a tray of hot chocolate.

"I thought that was the man's job," Sam scoffed.

"Are you really pulling that card?"

"Fine," Sam said. She grabbed a few logs from the stand near the fireplace.

"I'll grab some blankets from the hall closet," Carly offered.

"I can't believe I'm going to miss that special on neck surgeries," Sam grumbled. "They were going to show how they cut into the patient and everything!"

"You guys only have two blankets?" Carly asked, coming back into the living room with two thick blankets.

"Oh yeah, I used a bunch last week," Sam said.

"For what?" Carly frowned.

"A fort. Unfortunately I made it the backyard and never took it down, so…"

"Me and Sam will share one," Freddie said, taking one of the blankets.

"Aw, how cute," Carly grinned, wrapping herself up.

"You better not hog the covers like you do at night," Sam said, squeezing herself next to Freddie as he threw the blanket over themselves.

"_I_ hog the covers? I don't have any left to hog!"

"Stop being a baby," Sam snapped.

"I don't know why you take up so much covers anyway," Freddie went on, a grin creeping up on his face. "You always wind up pressed right against me by the time morning comes anyway."

"Oh please," Sam said. "You can't keep your hands off me during the night."

"You were the one who couldn't keep your hands to yourself last night…"

"Well you seemed to like it then, didn't you?"

"I never said I didn't."

"Um, guys?" Carly said, interrupting the two, whose lips were now inches apart. "You do realize I'm still in the room, right?"


	76. Chapter 76

_Hat_

"Aren't you glad I decided to have another crazy hat party?" Carly asked Sam, adjusting her pink sparkly beanie.

"Thrilled," Sam said, piling her plate with chips and dip.

"Oh come on, have fun," Carly said, nudging her best friend. "Go dance! Mingle, will you?"

"You know I don't mingle," Sam said.

"Sam, stop being all pouty," Carly said. "Look, I know your down because Freddie's been in Idaho all month for that computer camp-"

"Pft, please, I don't miss that nub," Sam scoffed.

"Sam," Carly said knowingly.

"Fine, I miss him, whatever," Sam said.

"Just try to have a good time," Carly said. "Freddie will be back next week; it's not that much longer."

"I know," Sam sighed. "And it's a cool party, by the way, Carls. I'm just going to run upstairs and grab something real quick."

She picked up her plate and walked upstairs to the iCarly studio, which thankfully was empty. She collapsed onto a yellow beanbag and took her phone from her pocket.

_Hey_ she texted to Freddie.

After a minute, her phone buzzed. _Hey, Sam. How's Carly's party?_

_Fun, I guess_, she replied. _How's camp?_

_Okay. I'm learning a lot, but I do sort of miss someone…_

_Your mom?_

_Ouch, low blow._

_Kidding. It better be me you miss._

_Actually, I was going to say Gibby._

…

_Relax, I'm joking. Yes, babe, of course it's you. I can't believe it's been a month since we've seen each other. _

_You are coming home next Friday, right?_

_Yeah. You'll be waiting at the airport for me?_

_We'll see. _

_Uh-huh…well the longer it takes me to see you, the longer you have the wait to get your present._

_Present? Is it edible?_

_You'll just have to wait and see. Though I may have or haven't purchased it at a store that sells chocolate covered meat products. _

_Get home. Now!_


	77. Chapter 77

_Disappointing_

"Well," Sam said, walking out of the movie theatre hand in hand with Freddie. "_That_ movie was the worst thing I've seen in my life."

"You're the one who wanted to see it," Freddie pointed out.

"_Car Explosions 3_," Sam said. "How could you go wrong with car explosions? The first two were great; this one was such a disappointment."

"Come on, Sam," Freddie said, putting his arm around his girlfriend. "It wasn't _that _bad."

"You wouldn't think so," she snapped. "You practically leapt out of your seat when all those hot girls in came onto the screen wearing bikinis."

"I did not," Freddie said quickly.

"Whatever," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Let's just get some ice cream…watching such a train wreck really makes you hungry."

"Sure thing," Freddie said as the couple walked back to Freddie's car.

Freddie pulled out of the movie theatre parking lot and started towards their favorite ice cream parlor, but he drove right past it.

"Yo nub, you missed the turn," Sam said.

"No I didn't," Freddie said, grinning.

"I thought we were getting ice cream."

"We will," Freddie assured her. "Right after we make a little stop."

He continued driving for twenty more minutes, ignoring Sam's pestering to tell her where they were heading. He finally turned into a large arena that was packed.

"Why are we here?" Sam frowned, getting out of the car.

"Well," Freddie said. "Before we went to the movie, I looked online on and read the review for the movie…everyone said it was terrible and that it sucked. I knew you would be really disappointed after you saw it so I-"

"Wait. You _knew_ that move was going to be bad and you didn't tell me?" Sam exclaimed.

Freddie raised an eyebrow. "Would you have listened to me anyway?"

"Probably not," she shrugged. "But you never answered me. Why are we here?"

"Since you didn't get all the car crashes and explosions you were hoping for," Freddie said, pulling two tickets out of his pocket. "I though this would make up for it."

"A monster truck rally?" Sam said, reading the ticked. "Are you serious?"

"I bought the tickets online right before we left for the movie," he told her, smiling at her excited expression. "What do you think? Will that make up for the disappointing movie?"

"Uh, duh!" Sam said, throwing her arms around his neck. "I love monster trucks! Thank you!"

"Anytime, princess," he said, kissing her lips. "Now come on. I'm guessing you want to hit the snack stand before we get to out seats."

"You know me so well," Sam said, taking his hand as she pulled him towards the arena.


	78. Chapter 78

_Root_

"_What_ did she say she was making?" Sam hissed to her husband, Freddie.

"Er, glazed bonsai roots," Freddie replied weakly. "I swear, Sam, they don't taste as bad as they sound."

"I'm almost done!" Freddie's mom called from the kitchen.

"Why did you tell her she could come over for dinner?" Sam whispered angrily.

"Hey, your mom came over last week in her bikini!"

"Okay, you've made your point," Sam mumbled. "But why does she have to cook?"

"Come on, Sam, she's a lonely old lady. Taking care of people's the only joy she gets anymore."

"Fine, but do you think our children will put roots in their mouths?" Sam said, crossing her arms.

Freddie blinked. She had a point…

"Kids!" Freddie called. "Come her for a sec."

Freddie and Sam's three children, Jason, who was seven, and their three-year old identical twin girls, Emma and Ashton, ran into the dining room.

"Alright," Freddie said, pulling out his wallet. "Grandma is cooking glazed bonsai roots for dinner and-"

"Gross!" all three children exclaimed.

Sam smirked.

"Okay, yes, it's gross," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "But…I'm willing to give anybody who eats them and pretends to love them twenty bucks."

The kids' eyes grew wide.

"Make it thirty," Emma said.

"Good girl," Sam said, grinning at her daughter, earning her a dirty look from Freddie.

"Twenty five," Freddie said, haggling with his toddler daughter. "Final offer."

"Deal."

"Here's ten each," Freddie said. "You get the other fifteen after you clean your plates."

"Care to put that in writing?" Jason said, grabbing a sheet of paper and a purple crayon.

Freddie reluctantly took the paper and scribbled out the agreement. "There," he said, handing the contract back the contract. "Remember; not a single root left on your plates, agreed?"

"I can't believe you just bribed them to eat your mom's cooking," Sam said as the kids ran out of the room.

"I had no choice."

"Uh-huh," Sam nodded. "And…what if _I_ told you I wasn't going to eat them?"

"Fine, do you want money too, Sam? Those three wiped me out, but you have my ATM number so you can-"

"In case you've forgotten, Benson, we share a bank account. I don't need you to bribe me with money."

"What do you want me to bribe you with…Oh, I got it , my body."

"As if," Sam laughed, smacking Freddie's shoulder as he grinned cockily. "No, I have something else in mind…"

"What?" Freddie said, frowning.

"I eat this root chiz, and refrain from making rude comments about it, you have to let me buy that flesh eating zombie picture we saw at the gallery we went to with Spencer last week to hang in our bedroom."

"That thing is creepy beyond belief, Sam!"

"That's what I want," Sam said simply, crossing her arms. "Take it or leave it."

"Dinner's ready!" his mom called from the kitchen. "Let me just put the roots on everyone's plate…"

"Fine," Freddie mumbled. "We'll go get it after dinner."


	79. Chapter 79

_Tracking_

Carly sat on her couch, absentmindedly eating Fladoodles while she flipped through the channels on the T.V.

"Hey," Spencer said, coming downstairs with a box of sculpture supplies. "Is this what you've been doing all day?"

"Yup," Carly nodded, not taking her eyes off of the screen.

"Where are Sam and Freddie? Usually at least one of them has eaten something from my fridge by this time in the afternoon."

"They said that they were doing some sort of experiment," Carly said.

"Experiment?" Spencer frowned. "I can buy Freddie doing that, but Sam?"

"Maybe it involves throwing meat at hobos or something," she shrugged. "When I asked them about it, they told me it was top secret."

"Aw, does little Carly Shay feel left out?"

"Actually, no," Carly said. "I love them both, but I forgot how quiet this place can be without them. Listen, I can actually hear my Fladoodles crunch!"

"That's…fantastic," Spencer said. "Anyway, have you seen my glue gun? I want to finish up this sculpture for the new zoo opening up before-"

Suddenly, the Shay's door flew open and Mrs. Benson barged in with some sort of electronic device in her hand.

"Alright, Missy. What's going on?"

"Um, come in?" Carly said.

"I called Freddie half an hour ago to tell him to come home for his mid-afternoon tick inspection and weekly lice shampoo," she explained. "When he didn't answer the seventh time I called him, I had to resort to my chip-tracking device."

"Chip tracking?" Carly repeated.

"How do you explain this?" Mrs. Benson demanded, thrusting the tracking device under Carly's nose. "According to this, my Freddie's been to Canada, Guam, New York and Paris today, and now he's on his way to Egypt!"

"Um, I don't really think that's possible," Carly said.

"Excuse me, but the chip does not lie," Mrs. Benson snapped.

"Mrs. Benson, come on," Spencer said, stepping in. "How could your seventeen year-old son be traveling across the globe in one day?"

"Oh my goodness, he must've been kidnapped by someone with a jet!"

"I-Yeah, I can't talk to you," Spencer said, going back to his sculpture.

"Look, I'm sure your, um, chip thingy is just malfunctioning," Carly tried to reason. "I doubt Freddie's being held captive in a jet by-"

"Where's the gutter girl?"

"What?"

"The gutter girl. I'm sure she has something to do with this."

"You mean Freddie's _girlfriend_?"

Mrs. Benson shuddered at those words. "Yes, his…companion. I'm sure she would find it amusing to hold my sweet boy against his will in a jet!"

"When I talked to them this morning they were together, which I'm sure they still are now," Carly said. "And Sam hasn't held Freddie anywhere against his will in over a month, for your information."

Mrs. Benson gasped. "Fine," she said. "If you refuse to be of help, I'll go find my Freddiebear on my own. I'll be on my way to the airport to buy a ticket for Czechoslovakia."

"Wow, that woman gets crazier every time I see her," Spencer said as Mrs. Benson slammed the door behind her.

"She's just on edge because even after six months, Sam and Freddie haven't broken up," Carly told him.

"I wonder what was wrong with her tracking device," Spencer said.

"Who know, it's probably dying from overuse," Carly shrugged, turning her attention back to the T.V.

….

"No way," Freddie laughed, his arm draped around Sam as they sat in a park a few blocks away from Bushwell Plaza looking at the laptop on Freddie's lap. "According to my mom's bank account, she just bought _another_ plane ticket. This time she's heading to Norway."

"She's nuts," Sam laughed. "Does she honestly believe you're hopping from country to country in this amount of time?"

"She's crazy," Freddie agreed.

"Yeah…okay this time let me pick the country!"

"No! You just picked Zimbabwe!"

"But you picked Russia, that's huge!"

"Fine. Pick somewhere."

"Um…Chile!"

"Chile it is," Freddie grinned pressing a few keys on his laptop.

"I'm so glad you hacked your mom's chip tracking device," Sam said, moving closer to Freddie. "This is more fun than the time we changed the directions of her GPS so she ended up in Ontario."

"_We_ never did that," Freddie frowned.

"Oh yeah…that was all me."


	80. Chapter 80

_Filter_

Freddie learned that with Sam as your girlfriend, you had to filter out a lot of things. For example, when she called him a "Total nub that will be living with his mom until he's thirty", she was really saying, beneath those cold words, "You're _my_ nub, and your mom better realize that you won't be sticking with her forever while you're with me."

When she would roll her eyes during the _Galaxy Wars _Marathons he insisted on having with her and groan, "This chiz is so lame. How could anyone with an ounce of dignity watch this for three hours straight?" she meant, "Do you really find this movie more interesting than me? Why don't you and I do something without intergalactic wars raging on?"

To the blind observer, Freddie knew that Sam came off as an abrasive, hard-headed chick that wanted things her way and her way only, but he knew better.

Behind every "Get out of my way," there was a "Please".

Somewhere within each demand for food there was a "Thank you".

Underneath every look of disgust was a girlish giggle trying to escape.

And of course, each and every "I hate you" was just Sam Puckett's special way of saying "I love you".


	81. Chapter 81

_Comment _

"And that's all we have for this iCarly," Carly laughed into the camera. "So until next time, stay gold."

"And eat plenty of dirt," Sam chimed in.

"And…we're clear," Freddie announced, turning off his camera. "Great show you guys."

"Thanks," Carly smiled as Sam and Freddie exchanged kisses. "So, tomorrow is your six-month anniversary. Any plans?"

"Yeah, we're going to spend the day at the water park," Sam said. "They got a new slide that makes you literally go upside down!"

"Wow," Carly nodded as Freddie ruffled Sam's hair. "Sounds like fun. Anyway, why don't we see what comments people are leaving about tonight's show?"

"Let's do it," Sam said, sitting herself down on a beanbag chair as Freddie grabbed his computer. Carly dragged a beanbag next to Sam's and sat down while Freddie leaned against Sam's.

"Man, already over 5000 comments," Freddie said as he logged into the site. "It's only been five minutes."

"Get to reading, Fredhead," Sam said.

"Alright, alright. HankeyPankey200 said 'Hilarious show, you guys. I loved the part when Carly and Sam tied Gibby's hand to his own dog.'"

"Where _did_ Gibby go?" Carly frowned. "He disappeared after that."

"He said he was going to take his dog out to…you know," Freddie said. "Poor guy was still tied on tight."

"And he'll stay that way," Sam said proudly. "Mama knows her knots."

"Moving on," Freddie said. "Katie896 said 'iCarly just keeps getting funnier and funnier. I can't stop watching this show!'"

"Aw, that's sweet," Carly smiled.

"Let's see," Freddie said, scrolling down the long list of comments. "Boxcar200 said…Hey!"

"What?" Sam asked, leaning over his shoulder.

"'I've always been a fan of iCarly'," Freddie read. "'But recently, I've noticed that Sam's really hot! I know her and Freddie are a thing, but I really hope that if I ever get to meet her, maybe she'd give me a chance.'"

Carly and Sam burst out laughing.

"It's not funny!" Freddie exclaimed.

"It's kind of funny," Carly said between laughs.

"No, it's not! This guy practically said he wants to steal Sam from me!"

"Relax," Sam said, still trying to hold back a laugh. "I wouldn't leave you for some guy who wrote some comment about me. If I were to leave you for anyone, it would be Matthew Gray Gubler."

Freddie raised an eyebrow.

"I'm kidding," Sam said, leaning down to give her boyfriend a kiss. "You know I, well…"

"Love him?" Carly finished.

"Yeah, that."

"I know," Freddie said. "I just don't like other guys lusting after my girlfriend. I mean, you practically beat that one girl up at the Groovy Smoothie who said I had nice biceps."

Sam rolled her eyes. "All I said was that she's better wipe the drool off her ugly face before I did it for her."

"Come on," Carly said. "Why don't we grab some cupcakes. I just bought a dozen chocolate cream ones from the bakery down the street. That is, unless Sam got to them."

"Nah, your cupcakes are safe," Sam said, standing up. "Can't say the same for your meatballs, though. You coming, nub?"

"In a sec, I just want to do something really quick first," he said.

The girls shrugged and headed downstairs to the kitchen.

Freddie began typing on his laptop.

"Sorry, Boxcar200," Freddie said triumphantly, clicking one last button. "Looks like you'll be needing to get your computer better anti-virus software."

…..

AN-Anyone else as obsessed with Matthew Gray Gubler as I am? I'm a huge fan of Criminal Minds. Though, I still think Nathan's incredibly hot as well…


	82. Chapter 82

_Grave_

Sam sat in her backyard, her head in her knees, in front of the grave she had just dug. She had made a tombstone out of a large, flat rock she found earlier that week at the park.

On the rock, she had engraved: _Here lies Frothy, the best rabid, three-legged cat anyone could ask for. RIP. 01-12-95 – 12-23-11. _

Though she complained about the cat all the time, she really was going to miss Frothy. He was the only friend she had after Melanie moved out to go to boarding school, and whenever her mom would go on one of her spontaneous trips, she liked having another living creature in the house that showed her affection.

Suddenly, she heard her back gate open and footsteps walking over to her.

"Hey," Freddie said gently, sitting down next to her. "How you doing?"

"Fine," she shrugged, not taking her eyes off the grave.

Freddie knew she was lying, but he didn't push the issue.

"Wow, you've had Frothy since '95?" he asked, reading the tombstone. "You weren't even a year old when you got him, huh?"

"No," Sam said. "My Uncle Carmine bought him for me and Melanie as a late Christmas present, since he was in jail for the real day."

"That's sweet," Freddie said, putting his arm around Sam. "Hey, I've always wondered, what happened to his fourth leg?"

"My dad backed over him," Sam said. "On his way to the tattoo parlor when I was three."

Freddie kissed Sam's head. "I'm sorry. That's terrible."

"Whatever. It's done."

"Hey, I got something for you," Freddie said, pulling her phone out of his pocket.

Sam frowned. "How'd you get my phone?"

"I've picked up a few skills from you," he grinned. He handed her the phone. "I made you a digital scrapbook of Frothy. You know, to help you remember him."

Sam looked through the many pictures Freddie had uploaded. "Wow," she said. "Where'd you get all these?"

"I called your mom and had her send them to me," he replied. "Do you like it?"

Sam didn't answer. She just leaned over and kissed her boyfriend on the lips.


	83. Chapter 83

_Gear_

"Well, I got dumped," Spencer said, hanging up his phone.

"By Cila?" Freddie frowned from the couch.

"Yup," Spencer said. "Man, she smelled like tacos…I liked that."

"Sorry, man," Freddie sad.

"Eh, it's fine," Spencer shrugged. "She was getting kind of clingy anyway. Hey, wasn't Carly here?"

"Nah, she drove over to the store to buy some props for tonight's iCarly," Freddie said.

"Oh. Well, I'm going to go hang out with Socko. You alright here?"

"Yeah, see you later," Freddie said.

Spencer had been gone no more than five minutes when Sam came bursting into the apartment.

"Guess what!" she exclaimed happily.

"What? You finally found that bacon flavored mouthwash?"

"No," she said. "But I'm not giving up hope on that…I got a car!"

"Really?" Freddie said. "That's great! How'd you get it, though. Wait…Sam, you didn't steal one, did you?"

"Relax," she said. "I haven't hotwired a car in almost a year. Anyway, you know how my mom's been dating that new guy?"

"The one with six fingers?"

"No, she broke up with him two weeks ago. The one with the handlebar mustache."

"Oh yeah."

"Well, it turns out he owns a used car shop right here in Seattle!" she said. "He just gave me a car for free!"

"Seriously? That's so cool. So can I see it? Did you drive it over here?"

"Um, you can see it," Sam said. "But I didn't drive it over here. I had my mom's boyfriend drop it off in the parking lot. The thing is…I need you to teach me to drive it."

"What do you mean?" Freddie asked. "You passed your driving test just fine. Well, other than calling your tester a sweaty little man."

"He called me 'Samantha'," Sam defended. "And anyway, that's not the problem. The car's a stick shift. I only know how to drive automatic. But I know _you _ know how to drive both."

"So you need my help," Freddie grinned.

"Are you going to teach me or not?" Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Probably. I just want you to beg."

"I don't beg," Sam said firmly. "I blackmail. Either you help me, Benson, or I'm never wearing that lip gloss you like so much again."

"Fine," Freddie said. "Let's go."

Sam led Freddie down to the parking lot where her car was parked.

"Alright," Freddie said. "The first thing you need to do it put it in first gear; that's going to give you the slowest speed, which is good for driving around a parking lot."

"Which one is first gear?" Sam frowned, looking at the gearshift.

"Maybe the one with the one on it?"

"Don't get snappy, Fredish," she said, stepping down on the clutch. The car began moving five miles an hour.

"This is too slow," Sam said. "Let's see what second gear can do."

"Sam, no!" Freddie yelled. "You have to step down on the clutch again or-"

But it was too late. The car had stalled out.

"Dude, what happened?"

"You have to step down on the clutch to change gears or the car will stall," Freddie explained.

"Why didn't you tell me that? You're a terrible teacher!"

"I did tell you, Sam," he said, trying to keep his blood pressure at a safe level. "Okay, let's try again."

"Can't I just go right to fifth gear?"

"You know Sam," Freddie said. "You're lucky that apple pie lip gloss of yours tastes so darn good or I would _not_ be doing this."

"Yeah you would," Sam said. "Because you love me."

"Yeah, yeah," Freddie said, smiling a little. "That's true…Wait, no, Sam! That's the reverse!"


	84. Chapter 84

_Deputy_

"Okay, here's how you play," Freddie said, putting the game disk in the console.

"I can't believe you'd rather play this than _UFC: Masters of the Ring_," Sam moaned.  
"I can't believe you guys passed up watching the new Sarah Fullock movie," Carly said, picking up a controller. "She's the queen of Romantic Comedies!"

Sam and Freddie both stared at her.

"Anyway," Freddie said, sitting down next to Sam. "Here's how it works. We each pick a character, they're all somebody you would find in an average city, and we have to figure out who's infiltrated our otherwise perfect community and is causing the havoc."

"Havoc?" Sam repeated.

"It's a word," Freddie defended. "Now, the infiltrator _can_ be one of us, but that's on a higher level, and I figured I'd start slow with you girls."

"Gee, thanks," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Can we just start?"

"Sure," he nodded. He clicked a few buttons on his controller and a screen with all the different characters to choose from came up.

"Alright, now everyone just pick someone and we can-Sam! _I _wanted to be the sheriff!"

"Tough," Sam said, selecting the character. "I got him first. Aw, but don't worry, baby. You can be my Deputy."

"I'm always the sheriff!" Freddie complained.

"Why? Shouldn't this game be just a _little _ realistic?"

"So you're saying I could never become a sheriff?"

Sam looked over at Carly and the girls tried not to laugh.

"You know," Carly said. "I'm very happy with my character; a hairstylist. Oh, look! Now she's flipping her hair. You know, maybe I should have my stylist cut it like that next time I go-"

"Sam," Freddie begged. "I _have _to be the sheriff."

"You _have _to be? Why?"

"Because…he's got a cool badge."

"Oh, okay. In that case, no!"

"But I had this all planned out," Freddie said. "I would be the sheriff, and you, Sam, would be that hot cheerleader over there."

"I would never hold pom poms even if my life depended on it," Sam said flatly. "Or put my hair in pigtails."

"But you've been arrested like four times," Freddie said. "Why would you want to be like the guy who put you in juvie?"

"I've never been arrested by a sheriff," Sam said. "Only buy those stupid cops that sit in their cars _looking_ for someone to arrest. If I was arrested by a sheriff, maybe I would've enjoyed the experience a little more."

"That made absolutely no sense," Freddie said. "Come on, Sam. You let me be the sheriff, and I'll buy you a ham."

"My mom's dating a butcher. I've got all the meat I can eat."

"I'll take you shopping and let you buy whatever you want."

"You did that yesterday."

"Freddie, just be the deputy so we can play," Carly sighed. "I'm getting bored."

"No! I'm not going to be her deputy!"

"Okay, I'll let you be the sheriff on one condition," Sam said.

"What?" Freddie asked.

"We play my UFC game after this and you be _my_ cheerleader."

"There's no cheerleaders in that game," Freddie frowned.

"I didn't mean in the game," Sam grinned.

Freddie sighed. "Fine."

"Good," Sam said happily. "Carly's got some pom poms upstairs you can use."


	85. Chapter 85

_Mask_

Sam was used to having to put on a mask for people. She always had to be the strong, tough girl who could handle anything that was thrown at her. She wasn't allowed to show fear or sadness or any other crippling emotion. She was Sam Puckett, and that's how everyone saw her.

Except for one person.

Freddie was the only one who saw Sam without that mask.

He was the only one who knew slept with a night light until she was fifteen because she was afraid of the dark, while everyone else believed Sam was fearless.

He was the only one who knew the true reason she used to pageants. Most people thought it was because her mom made her, which was partly true, as she was the one who signed her up for her first pageant, but only Freddie knew she continued with them willingly because she like feeling important in front of so many people; something she never felt at her own home.

Whenever someone would ask Sam about her dad, she would gruffly say that he left, but she told Freddie the details; how he looked Sam in the eye before he left and said he'd be back in a few hours to play with her like he'd promised her for days, and how she cried for weeks after he never came back.

Freddie was the only person who could say he truly knew Sam Puckett. Others knew the girl who put on a mask to appear like a strong, confident girl that wasn't to be messed with. She _was _strong and confident, but Freddie knew that beneath that scowl were the emotions and feelings she tried so hard to hide.


	86. Chapter 86

_Wow_

"We're ready to start in ten minutes," Carly said, poking her head into the room. "You guys ready?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded, nervously fidgeting with his bowtie.

"Don't you look fancy," Spencer said, walking into the room as Carly hurried away.

"Thanks, man," Freddie said.

"I helped him put the bowtie on," Gibby said proudly.

"Way to be the best best man," Spencer said, patting Gibby on the shoulder. "So, Freddie, you nervous?"

"A little," Freddie admitted. "What if something goes wrong?"

"Well it's a church filled with your family and Sam's family, so I can honestly say something will," Spencer said. "But it will all be fine. Besides, we've got two security guards on standby if anything too crazy happens."

"But what if I forget my vows or I drop the ring or I-"

"Relax," Spencer laughed. "Everyone feels like this before their wedding. Heck, Sam's nearly as nervous as you are in the next room."

"Puckett's don't get nervous," Freddie said.

"Well, she isn't going to be a Puckett for much longer," Gibby pointed out.

"Look, I've got to go get ready to walk her down the aisle," Spencer said. "You gonna be okay?"

"What if she doesn't say 'I do'?"

Spencer put a fatherly arm around Freddie. "Freddie, Sam is over the moon, head over heels, out of her mind in love with you. In fact, she even asked me the same exact question before I came in here."

"She did?"

"Uh-huh. And I told her the same thing about you."

"Well, because it's true," Freddie grinned.

"It's all going to work out," Spencer assured him. He turned to leave, but before he stepped out of the room, he turned back to Freddie.

"Wait till you see her. She looks beautiful."

…

Freddie stood at the alter, waiting for his soon-to-be bride to come through the church doors. At last, the bridesmaids and groomsmen came out, along with Carly, who was Sam's maid of honor and Gibby. Finally, the organ began and everyone stood up as Sam came through the doors with Spencer, who was giving her away.

Freddie had always thought Sam was beautiful, but seeing her now in that white dress with her golden curls framing her face, she was absolutely breathtaking.

When Sam finally reached the alter and Spencer gave her a kiss on the cheek, she stood next to him.

All Freddie could say was, "Wow."


	87. Chapter 87

_Browsing_

"Sam, this is like the tenth fight we've watched," Carly moaned.

"Come on, _tell_ me you're not enjoying watching Max Heagen punch the chiz out of Kito Rae," Sam said, sitting at the edge of her seat, her eyes glued to the T.V.

"I'm not enjoying it," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "You happy?"

"Yeah! Use the chair! Use the chair!"

"You know," Carly sighed. "Usually at sleepovers, girls do things like braid each others hair, gossip, paint nails, eat junk food, play-"

"Hey, I'm eating plenty of junk food," Sam defended.

"Yes, I'm very proud of you," Carly laughed getting up.

"Where you going?" Sam asked, still not taking her eyes off the screen.

"To surf the web," Carly replied. "I can't watch another guy get thrown twenty feet into the air."

Carly sat down at the counter and pulled up the iCarly site and began browsing through the comments. She clicked through them until she found one that was particularly interesting…

"Hey, Sam," Carly said. "Come see this."

"What?" Sam asked, walking over. "A new fight's about to begin in two minutes!"

"Look at this website someone linked to us from iCarly," she said, clicking on the link. "It's an entire site dedicated to yours and Freddie's relationship!"

"Dude, how creepy is this," Sam said, grabbing the mouse from her best friend. "How does this person even _have_ these pictures?"

"Maybe you two have a secret admirer-type person following you."

"You mean a _stalker_?" Sam frowned.

"Come on, I don't think whoever this is means any harm," Carly assured her. "Look, most of these are just downloaded from our site."

"It's still creepy," Sam insisted. "Why are people so obsessed with the fact that I'm dating Freddie? Yes, we all get that I probably have some weird brain disorder for doing so, but _just get over it_!"

"It looks like there's a lot about you and Freddie on the web," Carly said. "I found a few things last weekend too."

"Like what?"

"People wrote stories about you two."

"What sort of stories? Can I see?"

"No…they're icky."

"Ugh, this is ridiculous," Sam exclaimed, pulling out her pearphone. "I'm seeing if Freddie can shut these sites down or something."

"Why? They're sweet!"

"Sweet?" Sam repeated. "So if people you didn't even know plastered you and some guy's pictures all over the Internet you'd think it was sweet?"

"Well, kind of, if this guy was my boyfriend," Carly shrugged. "I mean, what harm is it to-"

"Carly," Sam said. "Did _you_ make these websites?"  
Carly avoided her eye contact. "You know, it's supposed to rain today, maybe we should-"

"Carly!"

"Okay, yes, fine," Carly admitted. "I made the websites. But I did _not _write those stories!"

"Why'd you do that?" Sam asked.

"I don't know, I was bored," Carly said. "But I guess if you really don't like them I'll-"

"Well," Sam sighed. "Whatever. Keep it up."

"Really?" Carly grinned.

"Sure," Sam shrugged. "I mean, I was just kind of weirded out by the idea of some random dude snapping pics of me and Freddie. Besides, it's not like that many people are going to see it. How many hits have you gotten so far?'

"Um, like 800…"

"800?" Sam exclaimed. "Already? Dude that's-"

"Er, you may want to add a thousand after that."

"800,000?" Sam cried. "800,000 people already viewed your stupid site?"

"What can I say?" Carly offered weakly. "You and Freddie make a really cute couple."

…

AN- thanks so much for reading and reviewing everyone! If you have a twitter, follow me shahnawz94


	88. Chapter 88

_Welfare_

"Ew, how did you get your hand stuck in _that_?" Carly cringed.

"I didn't know it was alive," Gibby defended.

"Great story, Gib," Sam said from Carly's ice cream love seat. "Do you have any thing to eat, Carls?"

"How can you eat after hearing that?" Carly asked.

"Dude, I could eat after watching a guy get a growth sawed off his neck," Sam said.

"She's not lying," Freddie said.

"I'm sure she's not…there's some leftover chicken fettuccini in the fridge downstairs."

"Excellent," Sam said, getting up. "Be back in a flash."

"I'm gonna go with her," Freddie said, getting up from his chair.

"Why, so you guys can make out?" Carly smiled knowingly.

"…Probably."

Freddie ran downstairs into the kitchen, where Sam was already halfway through the bowl of pasta.

"Wow, you're really devouring that pasta," Freddie commented.

"You got a problem with it?" she demanded.

"No, no," Freddie said. "I just don't want you to choke."

"I would never choke on something as amazing as this pasta," Sam said, stuffing another forkful into her mouth.

"Jeeze, your mom must've had to get three jobs to feed you as a child," Freddie said, grinning as he got a bottle of water from the fridge.

Sam didn't say anything.

"What? No snappy comeback? Wait…did your mom _really_ have to get three jobs to keep up with your appetite?"

"No," Sam mumbled. "It's just…never mind."

"No, tell me," Freddie insisted.

"It's stupid, I don't know why I was even going to bring it up."

"You can tell me, babe," Freddie said.

"Well, when I was little before I knew you or even Carly, my mom had to go on welfare to get food and everything."

"Oh," Freddie stammered, slightly surprised.

"It wasn't like we were starving or out on the street or anything," Sam said quickly. "We always had something to eat, nothing good like this pasta or ham of fried chicken, of course; it was mostly a bunch of canned foods. But it was just after my dad left us, and my mom was only working as a cashier at some store."

"I-I didn't know," Freddie said.

"It was only for like six months," Sam shrugged. "Then my mom got a new job."

"Still, it must've been rough," Freddie said.

"Eh, it wasn't bad," Sam said. "It made me appreciate the deliciousness of real food, like ham. Man…now I want some ham."

"Come on then," Freddie said, grabbing his jacket.

"You're gonna buy me ham?"

"Why not?" he shrugged.

"We have to do iCarly in fifteen minutes," she pointed out. "Are we going to be back in time?"

"I'll make sure we are," he told her. "Come on; let's get Sam her ham."


	89. Chapter 89

_Posing_

"Be back by eleven!" Freddie called after his sixteen year-old son, Jason as he headed out the door with his girlfriend.

"I will," Jason called back, closing the door behind him.

"Well, she seems nice," Freddie said, turning to Sam.

"I don't like her."

"What? Why not? Eileen was so polite? Besides, Jason really likes her."

"I just don't," Sam said. "Did you see the way she couldn't keep her hands off him?"

"What are you talking about?" Freddie laughed. "All they did was hold hands under the dinner table!"

"I don't like PDA, if you must know."

"Come on, she even complimented your ham," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Are you saying it didn't deserve to be complemented?"

"No, it was good. I just don't see why you don't like her."

"Because, she's trouble," Sam said, crossing her arms. "I have a bad feeling about her."

"Sam, she's in Advanced Placement classes at high school, volunteers three times a week at the children's hospital and was just accepted into Mensa! How is she bad news?"

"It's the sweet ones you have to look after," Sam said, picking at some leftover ham. "I just think Jason can do better than that girl! I don't like her. Hopefully their date will go bad and they'll break up."

"Who will break up with whom?" Carly asked, walking into the house.

"Do you knock?" Sam said.

"When have you ever _once_ knocked when you come over to my place? Anyway, who's breaking up with whom? You know I love gossip."

"No one's breaking up with anyone," Freddie said. "Sam just doesn't like Jason's new girlfriend that he brought over for dinner tonight."

"Why?" Carly asked.

"She's bad news! She probably goes around robbing banks!"

"Yeah, okay," Freddie said.

"He's only sixteen, that's way too young to date anyway," Sam huffed.

"What? Are you kidding me? You let Emma go out on a date last week, without even asking me, I might add, and she's only twelve!"

"It wasn't a date," Sam said. "She was with five other kids."

"Really? So why was the only person she was talking about after some dude named Aiden?"

"Look, that girl just doesn't sit well with me. My son deserves some one a lot better than that-that gutter girl."

Carly laughed. "Gutter girl? Oh my God, Sam, you realize who you sound like?"

"No, please enlighten me," Sam said, grabbing a soda from the fridge.

"You sound like Freddie's mom right after you two started going out! My God, for all we know you're really her posing as Samantha Benson!"

"I do _not_ sound _anything_ like his mother!" Sam exclaimed, slamming the fridge shut. "I'm nothing like that freak show of a lady!"

"Yeah, she does sound like her," Freddie grinned. "I think she even called you a gutter girl too."

"So? That doesn't mean anything," Sam snapped.

"Admit it," Carly smiled. "You're just as over-protective of Jason as Freddie's mom was of him."

"When have I ever once give Jason a tick bath? Or made him wear cloud block? Or done any of those other ridiculous things she did?"

"Okay, maybe you're not that over protective," Freddie said. "But come on, Sam, you've got to admit that Eileen is a nice girl. And she makes Jason happy, isn't that all that matters? You know he won't love you any less."

"What makes you think that I-"

"Please, that's why you don't like her," Freddie said. "Heck, that's why my mom didn't like you. And that's probably why I'm not going to let Emma or Ashton date till they're thirty! And why you'll be going through this same exact thing again when Tyler's old enough to stop thinking girls have cooties."

Sam didn't say anything.

"Hey, you said the girl's name was Eileen?" Carly said. "Is her last name Jacobson by any chance?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "Why, you know her?"

"Spencer knows her parents," Carly said. "He sold them a sculpture once. I knew they had a daughter about Jason's age…they own the pie shop across from the mall."

Sam perked up. "Really? The one with the eight types of Boston cream pie?"

"That's the one."

"I love that place! Holy chiz, Jason better marry that girl; I could get free pie for life!"

"So you like her now?" Freddie asked, amused. "What happened to her being no good?"

"I didn't know her family was in the pie business! We have to tell Jason to bring her over again for dinner…that kid better not screw this up; hopefully he's not too much like Freddie in the romance department."

"Hey, I'm plenty romantic!"

"Daddy," Sam and Freddie's daughter, Emma said, coming into the kitchen. "Can you drive me over to Aiden's house? I wanted to-"

"Nope," Freddie said shortly. "No chance."


	90. Chapter 90

_Tune_

"Carly?" Freddie called as he walked into the Shay's apartment. "Sam? You guys here?"

There was no answer, and Freddie assumed that meant that Spencer and the girls were out doing something. He headed up to the iCarly studio to put a few last minute touches on the new swing out monitor he had installed just last week. When he reached the hallway that led to the studio, though, he was surprised to see the door was open and the sound of someone humming came from the room.

Curious, Freddie peered in.

Sam was sitting on a beanbag chair, her back to the door, doodling in a notebook as she hummed some sort of tune.

Freddie stared. It had been three weeks since they had broke up in that elevator, and everyday when he was around her he had a hard time figuring out how he could've been so stupid as to let her walk away from him after their last midnight make-out session had ended. Now, seeing her looking so peaceful, it was as if he had taken a knife to his gut as he reminded himself that it was no longer appropriate to stride right over to her and kiss those red lips that were moving ever so slightly now as Sam began to softly sing the song she had been humming.

"Um, hey," Freddie said, finally bringing attention to himself.

"Oh, when'd you get here?" Sam said, turning around.

"Just now," Freddie said quickly. "Where's Carly and Spencer?"

"At some movie with a friend of their dad's," she said.

"Ah," he nodded. "I just came by to program our new monitor to swing out a little faster for the show tomorrow."

"Why?" she asked, rolling her eyes.

"Nothing better to do," he admitted.

"Yeah, I guess that's why I'm here," Sam said, getting up. "But I'll leave you to your little computer thing."

"No," Freddie said. "Don't go. I can do this some other time. You want to hang out or something?"

"Eh, why not?" Sam said. "You want to go grab some food at the Groovy Smoothie? I have some extra cash that my mom's boyfriend paid me to get out of the house so him and my mom could make out."

"I'll buy your food," Freddie said.

Sam grinned. "But we're not dating anymore; don't you think that would be kind of weird if you still bought me things?"

"I bought you stuff before we went out," he pointed out.

"Yeah, but it would still feel weird," Sam said.

"We're still friends," Freddie reminded her with a smile. "Friends buy each other lunch occasionally."  
"Yeah, I guess you're right," Sam said softly.

"You don't seem to enthusiastic about getting a free lunch," Freddie said.

"I'm just tired," she mumbled. "On second thought I think I'll just go to the park; walk around."

"Can I come?"

She shrugged. "It's a free country."

Freddie frowned. "Sam, what's up? You seem upset about something?"

"It's stupid," she said, pressing the down button on the elevator.

"Tell me," he pleaded, looking into her blue eyes.

"Swear you won't tell anyone?"

"Swear."

"Fine. It's just, when you offered to pay for my food even though we're not a couple anymore it just…I don't know, made the whole break up seem real for the first time."

Freddie blinked. "Oh-I'm sorry-"

"It's no big deal," Sam said as the elevator door opened and the two stepped in. "It was just…kind of hard getting that through my head for the first time." She sighed. "But I guess there's nothing we can do about it now."

"Well," Freddie started, nervously putting his hands in his pockets. "There is _one _thing we could do."  
"What?"

"This."

Instinct taking over, Freddie leaned down and kissed Sam on the lips. She instantly responded, wrapping her arms around his neck.

When the elevator arrived back at the first floor, the two finally broke apart.

"Have you missed me as much as I've missed you?" Freddie said, breathing heavily.

"I was about to ask you the same thing," Sam said, grinning.


	91. Chapter 91

_Fond_

"I can't believe you shoved that girl like that," Freddie said as him and Sam entered Carly's apartment. "She's probably scared for life!"

"Oh no," Carly said, putting down her PearPad. "What happened?"

"Nothing," Sam said, sitting down on the couch.

"She got into a fight at the Groovy Smoothie," Freddie said, sitting down next to his girlfriend.

"Again?" Carly moaned. "Sam, T-Bo's not going to let you in there anymore."

"Please," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Like T-Bo has the guts to do that to me."

"Why'd you get into a fight anyway?" Carly asked.

"The girl was stupid," Sam said, playing with a lose thread on her Penny-T.

"She didn't even do anything," Freddie said. "I just went to the bathroom, and when I came out, Sam had this poor girl in a headlock!"

"Freddie," Mrs. Benson said, walking into the apartment without knocking. "There you are. I need you to come with me to the drugstore. I need to get you sized for protective gloves for the winter."

"Mom," Freddie moaned. "You know my size."

"These are custom made," Mrs. Benson said. "Now come on before they're all sold out."

"See you guys later," he said, giving Sam a quick peck on the cheek.

"What drugstore sells custom-made protective gloves?" Carly frowned.

Sam didn't respond.

"What's wrong?" Carly asked her best friend.

"Nothing."

"Sam," Carly said knowingly. "You can tell me."

"Alright, look," Sam sighed. "That girl at the Groovy Smoothie…she was going to make a move on Freddie."

"What?"

"I was at the counter while Freddie was in the bathroom about to order another smoothie when this perky little redhead comes up behind me and starts talking with her friend about how hot Freddie was."

"No way," Carly said. "Did she see you there? Everyone knows you two are a couple."

"Oh, she saw me alright," Sam said. "She said that once he got a look of her, he'd leave me in a heartbeat. As if…she was hideous, Carls. She had a hairy mole next to her eye!"

"That's terrible," Carly agreed. "But seriously, Sam. You can't just go around fighting every girl that looks at Freddie. I thought you made a promise that you wouldn't get into fights as often so you wouldn't have to spend anymore time in jail."

"I didn't start the fight," Sam muttered.  
"What?" Carly said.

"I didn't start the fight," Sam said. "After the girl said that, I turned around and told her to shut her mouth. Then I turned back around and before I knew it, she punched me in my side!"

"Oh my God," Carly said. "That skunkbag!"

"I _had_ to fight back; I wasn't going to get beat up by that freak show," Sam said. "But when Freddie came out of the bathroom, I guess it sort of looked like _I _had started the whole thing."

"Why didn't you just tell him what really happened?" Carly asked.

"Because," Sam said. "I didn't want him to know that I was…jealous."

"Aw, Sam, you love him," Carly smiled.

"I'm…_fond_ of him," Sam shrugged.

"Okay," Carly laughed. She pulled out her pearphone.

"Who are you texting?" Sam frowned.

"No one."

"Are you texting Freddie about this? Give me that phone, Shay!"

"No!" Carly said, jumping up as Sam made a grab for her.

"Carly!" Sam yelled, running after her friend. "Get back here!"


	92. Chapter 92

AN- I got a request to make a continuation of the last oneshot, Fond, so here it is

…..

_Reaction_

Sam ran a towel through her wet hair as she walked out of her bathroom in her pajamas. She kicked off her slippers, perhaps with a little more force than necessary, as they knocked over the vase her mom had won in yodeling contest in Vegas, and sat down on the couch to watch T.V.

She was still upset about the incident at the Groovy Smoothie. Sure, she knew a lot of girls started at Freddie; he was _very_ muscular now, and every once in a while some iCarly fan would come up to him while they were out and ask if they could get a picture with him. That didn't bother Sam; but this girl had actually implied not only that she wanted to steal Freddie away from her, but that she could. The only thing that kept her from hitting her first was the promise she made to Freddie after he had to bail her out of juvie a few months ago to try not to get arrested anymore.

She wasn't mad that Freddie thought that she started the fight. She knew Freddie wouldn't hold it against her. The worst-case scenario would be that her would try to give her a lecture on how to behave properly in public, which she would of course have to cut short by distracting him with her lips…

She heard the doorbell ring, suddenly, snapping her out of her thoughts.

"Who is it?" she called through the door. After a hobo begging for toothpaste showed up at her doorstep last week, she wasn't taking any chances…

"Freddie," her boyfriend called back.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, opening the door and letting him in.

"What, a boyfriend can't surprise his girlfriend with a visit?"

"Not when I'm in the middle of watching _America's Grossest Scabs_; what do you want?"

"I just wanted to say I'm sorry if my reaction to your little fight was sort of…harsh," he said.

Sam shrugged. "Eh, it's no big deal. I'll consider it payback for eating the last of your pie that Spencer made."

"Wait, what?"

"Never mind," she said quickly. "Go on."

"I didn't know that the girl had said that I would leave you for her and that she had actually hit you first, so I-"

"Hang on, Carly told you?" Sam exclaimed. "I told her not to! We shook ankles!"

"She told me while she was drinking Cherry Peppy Cola," Freddie said. "You know how Carly gets when she has caffeine in her."

"I'm still killing her tomorrow," Sam mumbled.

"Why didn't you just tell me?" Freddie asked.

"Because, you would make a big deal over the fact that I got jealous."

"No I wouldn't," Freddie said. "And anyway, you know that there's no chance of me _ever _leaving you for any other girl. I love you, and whether you want to say it or not, I know you love me too."

"I know that," Sam said, smiling. "But that girl had it coming."

"Yeah, she did," Freddie agreed. "And you know what? If we ever see her again, I'll go right up and tell her that no guy in their right mind would think about dating her when they had someone as amazing as you."

"Can you remind her that I can pound her pointy little face in less than three seconds too?"

"I will," Freddie laughed.

"Good," Sam said, satisfied. "Now come on."

"Um, where are we going?"

"The Groovy Smoothie! Since that stupid girl made me fight her, I never got a chance to get another smoothie!"

"But you're in your pajamas!"

"So? T-Bo came to work in his bathing suit last week! You really think that place has that high of a dress code?"

"Fair enough," Freddie shrugged. He pulled his keys out of his pocket and him and Sam headed for his car.

"But just for the record," he told her. "You look just as hot in those pajamas as any other girl does in an evening gown."


	93. Chapter 93

_Impress_

"Look, I'm sorry!" Spencer said as Carly frantically tried to dry off her laptop, which was now, thanks to Spencer, dripping in iced tea.

"I don't think it's completely ruined," Carly muttered. "Why were you jumping around anyways?"

"Socko bought me springy socks and I was testing them out!"

"At least it turns on," Carly sighed. "I'll text Freddie and see if he can come over and help me."

"Don't worry; if I broke it I'll give you my laptop," Spencer told her. "Now I've got to hop over to the Groovy Smoothie and show these socks to T-Bo!"

Carly couldn't help but laugh as her brother ran out the door. A second later Freddie entered the apartment.

"Hey, I got your text," Freddie said. "What's up?"

"Spencer spilled iced tea on my laptop," she explained. "I think I wiped it off the keyboard in time, but can you just look at it and make sure-" she stopped as a strong smell hit her nose.

"Um, what is that?" she asked, frowning. She sniffed Freddie. "Are you wearing cologne?"

"Yeah," he smiled. "It's that new Kevin Bline scent. You like it?"

"I don't know, it burned my nose off," Carly coughed, trying to fan the aroma away from her with a magazine. "Did you dump the whole bottle on you?"

"I only used five squirts!"

Carly looked at him knowingly.

"Time three," he mumbled.

"Why would you put cologne come on just to come across the hall?" Carly asked.

"Oh, you know," Freddie said, typing a few things on Carly's computer. "It's important to smell nice when you…help a friend with her sticky computer. In case one has to…smell good."

"Right," Carly smiled. "So you just spray on $90 cologne all the time to walk over here?"

"Um, yes?"

"Really?"

"Uh-huh."

"Freddie," Carly grinned. "Your girlfriend's not here to impress; Sam went home an hour ago."

"Oh," Freddie said, blinking. "Well that's…interesting…you know what, Carls, I'm just gonna go run across the hall really quick…"

"And do what?"

"Er…scrape this chiz off me; it's sort of starting to make me dizzy."


	94. Chapter 94

_Musical_

"Mom, stop!" Freddie exclaimed as his mother frantically sprayed him with some liquid she had bought online. "Ow! It went in my eye!"

"Freddie, stop squirming!" Mrs. Benson ordered her son. "I need to sanitize you!"

"Mom, this is the third time this week," he said, coughing as she continued to spray him. "I'm clean."

"I can't be too sure," she said. "Since you _insist_ on swapping saliva with that gutter girl every day-"

"She's my girlfriend, mom," Freddie sighed. "And she has a name."

"Fine," she scoffed. "Since you insist on swapping saliva with _Samantha_ every day, I can't take any chances. Who knows how much bacteria she caries."

"Alright," Freddie said firmly, getting up. "I'm going to go across the hall."

"But I still need to-"

"Bye, mom," Freddie said, quickly heading out of the apartment.

Carly actually wasn't home; she was spending the weekend with Spencer visiting their cousins the Dorfman's, but he knew perfectly well Sam was at the apartment.

Sure enough, when he opened the door he saw the blonde sprawled out on the Shay's couch with an extra large bowl of popcorn.

"Hey princess," he greeted his girlfriend.

"Oh, hey," Sam said, quickly changing the channel. "What's up?"

"Why'd you change the channel?" Freddie frowned.

"I didn't change it," Sam said. "I've been watching this all day."

"Really," Freddie said, looking at the screen. "You've been watching an infomercial for a self-cleaning duster all day?"

"Um, yes," Sam nodded. "You know how I feel about dust."

"Yeah, you could care less about it," Freddie said, making a grab for the remote.

"Give that to me!" Sam yelled, grabbing his arm.

Freddie struggled against Sam's strong hold until he finally found the recall button on the remote and pressed it. The channel changed back to what it was previously, and showed some sort of big dance number with a bunch of people singing.

"Is this a musical?" Freddie asked, trying hard to keep the grin off his face.

"Shut up," Sam snapped.  
"What? I didn't say anything!"

"You were thinking it!"

"What exactly was I thinking?" he asked.

"Look, I happen to like musicals, okay?"

"Okay," Freddie smiled. "I just never figured you'd be into a bunch of people singing and dancing. There's nothing wrong with it, though."

"I just think they're kind of cool," she mumbled.

"I've never really watched them," Freddie said. "I'm more of a sci-fi kind of guy."

"Yeah, I've noticed," Sam scoffed.

"So what's happening here?" Freddie asked, sitting down next to his girlfriend, watching the T.V.

"She's trying to figure out which of those three guys is her dad," Sam said. "Because she's getting married and she wants him to give her away."

"…so they burst out into song?"

"Stop it," Sam said, slapping his shoulder. "I don't give you a hard time when we watch _Galaxy Wars_."

"What? That's all you do!"

"Yeah well," Sam shrugged. "That movie deserves to be made fun of."

"You're a piece of work, you know that?" Freddie laughed, kissing her on the lips.

"I try," she smiled.

…

AN- shout outs to whoever guesses which musical Sam was watching


	95. Chapter 95

AN: So A LOT of people know their musicals, lol Congratulations to:

NCISGleek

msalwaysbelieveinlove

gothygurl

sincerely-sweet

xladyjagsvolleyball16x

mamaluvsangst

AlexaJohn185

Moviepal

aapeters

Kenziexx

HeyHeyIt'sEmC

DangerIsNotMyMiddleName

Mary Rachel

Oceanmistsupporter

Xx-Kee-Kee-xX

Read-a-holic2200

Vanirgii

julius

karlianne13xx

HPNCISVictorious14

OneDream 2Dream

4evaDayDreamer

Echo101

You guys all guessed the right answer to what musical Sam was watching in the last chapter, Mama Mia!

…..

_Falling_

"So do you guys want to do something this weekend?" Carly asked her friends, not looking up from her game of Happy Pigs she was playing on her pearphone. "I'm sure Spencer could watch Jason for you two and we could-"

She looked up from her pearpad and saw that both Sam and Freddie had fallen asleep.

"Guys!" Carly said loudly, waking the couple up from their slumber.

"Carly, no," Sam moaned. "I'm tired!"

"Me too," Freddie yawned. "I don't think I've actually slept in three months."

"Is it really that hard taking care of a baby?" Carly asked sympathetically.

"You have no idea," Sam said, wiping the sleep out of her eyes. "Jason wakes up at least five times each night."

"Yeah," Freddie nodded in agreement. "And every time we have to change him and feed him and-"

"Oh shut up," Sam snapped. "You always wake me up to do all that."

"He won't stop crying for me!" Freddie defended. "He likes you better!"

"Smart kid," Sam yawned, lying back down on the couch. "Now can I at least sleep for an hour? Your mom's going to be back with Jason any minute."

"Okay, you know what," Carly said. "You guys need a break; you can't keep falling asleep every five minutes."

"Yeah, a break," Freddie scoffed. "Let me just tell Jason to stop crying for one night and see how that goes."

"I'm serious," Carly said. "Why don't you leave Jason here tonight and I'll take care of him?"

"You wouldn't last five minutes with that kid," Sam said with her eyes still shut.

"She's right," Freddie nodded. "You'd be ready to collapse in no time."

"No I wouldn't," Carly said. "Look, you guys are my best friends and I want to help you out."

"You haven't even watched him during the day yet," Sam reminded her. "And taking care of him at night will be ten times harder."

"I can handle it," Carly assured her. "I've babysat for Spencer's kids before."

Sam sighed and looked at Freddie. "I do kind of want to sleep for more than two hours at a time."

"So do I," Freddie nodded.

"Okay," Sam told Carly. "If you really think you can handle it. I'll run and pick up Jason from Freddie's mom and leave him here with you."

"Thanks, Carls," Freddie said. "You're a life saver."

"Anytime," she laughed. "Now go home and sleep!"

….

"What time is it?" Sam asked, walking into her and Freddie's kitchen the next morning after a refreshing good night's rest.

"Ten o'clock," Freddie grinned, giving his wife a kiss on the lips.

"Seriously?" Sam grinned. "I don't think I've slept past six since Jason was born."

"I know," he nodded, putting some bacon in the frying pan. "I just called Carly and told her she can bring Jason over."

"As much as I love my sleep, I really miss that kid," Sam said, pouring herself a glass of orange juice.

"Same," Freddie said.

There was a knock at the door.

"I guess that's Carly," Sam said, running over to answer the door. When she opened the door she saw Carly with bags under her eyes, her hair a mess and still wearing pajamas.

"Hi Jason," Sam cooed, taking her son from Carly. "Did you miss me?"

"That child does not believe in sleep," Carly said.

"You're a mess," Freddie said, walking over to the door.

"Thanks!" she snapped.

"We really owe you one, Carls," Sam said. "I haven't had this much energy in so long!"

"I'm glad some one has energy," Carly yawned. "I'm going back home. I need to sleep for a week."


	96. Chapter 96

AN: Even though they didn't respond in time for the shoutout last chapter, I'm still giving one to Geekquality for knowing what musical Sam was watching back in ch94

…..

_Rank_

"I love this dress she's wearing," Carly said, pointing at a picture in one of her teen magazines. "It's so pretty. I wonder if I can find it online."

"Wow, chocolate chip cookies don't float in mountain fizz," Sam said, tossing tiny pieces of cookie into her drink. "Who would've thought?" She chugged the drink down.

"It's because of the density of the soda," Freddie explained. "See, what density is-"

"You really need to shut up," Sam said.

"Oh, and look at this necklace," Carly continued, flipping through the magazine. "It's so sparkly. Isn't it beautiful, Sam?"

"Yeah, lovely," Sam said without even looking at the magazine. "When's the pizza getting here? I'm starving."

"We just ordered it five minutes ago," Carly reminded her, continuing to look through the magazine. "Yay, the quizzes! Hey, here's one for you Sam. It tells you if your boyfriend is worth keeping around."

"Gee, that's nice," Freddie said sarcastically.

"Why do I have to do it?" Sam asked.

"Because I don't have a boyfriend," Carly pointed out. "As much as I would love to go out with that cute guy from French…but anyway, just answer the questions and see what the quiz says."

"Ugh, fine," She moaned.

"Alright," Carly said. "Question one. Rank you boyfriend's attractiveness on a scale of one to ten."

"Are negative numbers allowed?"

"Hey!" Freddie said indignantly.

"What?" Sam asked innocently.

"Freddie, why don't you go down stairs and see how Spencer's coming along with that sculpture?" Carly asked. "Sam's never going to give me real answers with you sitting there?"

"Why? I'd give you real answers," Freddie said. "I'd be a nice boyfriend and say she's a ten."

"I deserve a ten," Sam said.

"Freddie, please," Carly said.

"Okay, okay," Freddie sighed getting up. He grabbed his laptop and left the iCarly studio.

"So what's your real answer?" Carly asked Sam. "What would you rank Freddie?"

"What makes you think my answer's going to be any different now that he's gone?" Sam asked.

Carly gave her a knowing look.

"Ten," Sam muttered.

"Aw," Carly grinned, scribbling down Sam's answer. "Onto question two…how often do you and your boyfriend kiss per day? I can answer that one; at least 90 times a day. It seems whenever I walk into the room you two have your lips pressed together."

"We do not," Sam said, blushing.

"The choices are once, three times, five times, or more than five," Carly smiled.

"More than five, I guess," Sam said.

"Alright, number three-"

"There's more?"

"How often does your boyfriend compliment your appearance? Never, once in a blue moon, only on date nights, or daily."

Sam smiled. She loved how Freddie always told her how beautiful she looked everyday, even if she didn't let it on. "Daily," she told Carly.

"Alright, here's the last one," Carly said. "Does your boyfriend shy away at any mention of the word 'love'?"

Sam shook her head. Freddie was never shy about telling her that he loved her. That was more her territory.

"According to this quiz," Carly said, calculating Sam's results. "Your boyfriend is the guy every girl dreams of having. He wants you to stay in his life, and he's not afraid to make his love known to the world. Oh my God, that's so sweet! Now I _really_ want a boyfriend!"

"I really want ham," Sam said, getting up. "Have fun with your magazine, Carls."

"Will do," Carly nodded. "Oh, look, a coupon for ten dollars off a facial…"

Sam went downstairs where Freddie was sitting on the couch playing on his laptop.

"Where's Spencer?" Sam asked, grabbing some ham from the fridge.

"He ran out to buy more beads," Freddie said, shutting his computer. He walked over to Sam. "So, am I a keeper?"

"Wouldn't you like to know," Sam grinned.

"You're really not going to tell me what the quiz said?"

"Nope," she replied. "The quiz was stupid."

She put down her ham and wrapped her arms around Freddie's neck and leaned up and whispered in his ear. "I already knew you were. I didn't need some dumb magazine to tell me that."

"I wouldn't give you up for anything either," Freddie laughed.


	97. Chapter 97

_Hanging_

"This is nice," Spencer said as he watched an enemy ship get shot down on _Galaxy Wars_ with Freddie and Gibby. "Just three dudes, hanging out, watching the Sci-Fi channel."

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "Um, seriously, dude, you might want to get some friends your own age."

"Don't be harsh," Spencer said, getting up. He headed to the fridge and opened it. "Just as I thought," he said, slamming it shut again. "Freddie, I hope you know I have no food in my own home because of your little girlfriend."

"How's that my fault?" Freddie frowned. "You know no one can stop Sam from eating anything edible."

"I guess I'll just order some Chinese food," Spencer said. He picked up his pearphone.

"Jeesh, you've been texting all through the movie," Gibby commented as Freddie typed away on his phone. "What, am I just not good company?"

"You're great company, Gib," Freddie said without looking up from his phone. "I'm just texting with Sam."

"Oh, so you like your girlfriend more than me?"

Freddie looked up. "Um…well, I like her in a _different_ way, Gibby."

"I see," Gibby said, crossing his arms.

"Come on, Gibby," Freddie sighed. "I like Sam _romantically_, but you're still my best guy friend."

"Hey!" Spencer yelled from the kitchen. "What about me?"

"Yeah, and you're my best thirty something year-old friend," Freddie said.

"I don't see you texting me the whole time you watch movies with Sam," Gibby pointed out.

"Well yeah, because I'm doing _other things_," Freddie grinned.

"We could do other things during this movie."

"No, Gibby, we really couldn't." Freddie sighed.

"Why not?"

"Because I'm not going to kiss you!"

"Gross," Gibby cringed. "Who's talking about kissing?"

"Never mind," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Look, all I'm saying is it wouldn't kill you to pay me a little more attention," Gibby said.

"Fine," Freddie sighed. "When I'm on my date tonight with Sam I'll make sure I text you."

"_Thank_ you."

…

Freddie sat on his couch later that night, making out with Sam.

"You're lips taste really good," she said between kisses. "Like that chicken we had for dinner."

"Yours too," Freddie laughed. Then he pulled away. "Oh that reminds me; I have to text Gibby."

"Um, why?"

"He wants me to think of him more when I'm on dates with you."

"What?"

"It's Gibby," Freddie shrugged as he pulled out his pearphone. "I've learned not to question him."


	98. Chapter 98

_Local_

"You're what?" Carly exclaimed.

"Moving," Sam said.

"I-No! You can't!"

"Carly, Sam and I are going to be married in two weeks," Freddie said. "That means we'll be living _together_."

"Yeah, and there's no way I'm going to be moving in with his mom," Sam said. "And I don't think you'd like it too much if he moved into our place."

"I wouldn't mind," Carly said quickly. "The apartment's plenty big for three people."

"There's only one room," Sam pointed out.

"Well I'm sure if I move some of my stuff around we can make room for him," Carly reasoned.

"Carly," Sam sighed. "You get grossed out when you walk into the room and see me and Freddie making out…how do you think you're going to react if you walk in and see…other things."

"Er…okay, I see your point," Carly cringed. "Well…Sam, I'm sure if you move into Freddie's room at his mom's place it wouldn't be _too_ bad."

"Have you met the lady?" Sam laughed. "She tried to sanitize my lips when I was over there the other night!"

"Besides," Freddie said looking at the ground. "We, um, sort of already put in a down payment on a place."

"What?" Carly frowned. "You did? Without even telling me?"

"Look, we're sorry about that," Sam said. "But why don't you come over there this weekend? You can help us pick out paint colors."

"No," she said firmly. "I'm not going to play any part in this. I can't believe you guys are going to move away from me. We aren't going to be able to see each other every day and hang out. I'm not going to have anybody to help me un-stick Spencer to his sculptures or laugh at the Dingo channel with…I'm losing my best friends!"

"What are you talking about?" Sam asked.

"We can still do all those things," Freddie said.

"How? You guys will be miles away in your fancy new place and I'll-"

"Miles away?" Sam repeated. "What are you going on about?"

"Carls," Freddie laughed. "Our new house is only three blocks from here."

Carly blinked. "Huh?"

"Come on," Sam said, putting her arm around her best friend. "You didn't really think you could get rid of us that easily?"

"So you're not moving miles away?"

"No," Freddie assured her. "When we started looking for houses we made sure we'd be able to get some place local. It took a little longer to finally find a place on the market that we could afford, but we managed."

"I-I, well, now I feel like an idiot," Carly said. "You couldn't have mentioned that before?"

"You never gave us a chance," Sam said. "And anyway, it was sort of fun to watch you freak out."

"Yeah, yeah, very funny, Puckett," Carly grinned. "Or should I say, Puckett-Soon-To-Be-Benson. Now then, about those paint colors…can I seriously help you pick them out? Because I saw this really nice shade of blue at the paint store the other day that I think would look great in a living room. Oh, and then there's this really nice yellow that would look perfect in your kitchen. Hey, can I help you pick out furniture too? We could spend the whole day at that Norwegian store! Sure, you have to put everything together yourself, but there's some cool stuff there! And I have this really good idea for a bedroom layout and-"

Sam looked at Freddie. "See, I told you we could probably get her to do all the decorating."

"I never doubted you," he grinned, kissing her quickly. "Hey, you wanna hit the smoothie?"

"Yeah, let's do it."

The couple headed out of the apartment, leaving Carly happily chatting away to herself.


	99. Chapter 99

_Arrangement_

"I still don't understand how you set our sink on fire," Carly muttered as she picked up the remains of charred dishes from the burnt sink.

"Yeah, that takes a special sort of talent," Sam nodded.  
"Look, I don't get it either!" Spencer exclaimed. "Just be thankful my duck cup wasn't hurt."

"Duck cup?" Sam repeated.

"Yes, it's a cup shaped like a duck," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"It makes my milk taste better!" Spencer defended.

"Look, Spence, thanks to your little mishap here, we have no more dishes," Carly said. "Granddad's going to be here for dinner in less than two hours so can you go out and buy me a new pan and some plates? Please?"

"Jeesh, bossy," Spencer scoffed, but he headed out of the kitchen nonetheless.

"Hey, did you finish those leftovers from Four Guys?" Sam asked heading to the fridge.

"No, there still there for you to devour," Carly replied as Freddie walked into the apartment.

"Hola chicas," he said, heading into the kitchen.

"Hey, Freddie," Carly greeted him, tossing the black brick that used to be her sponge into the trash. "Thanks for uploading all those pics to the site for us."

"No problem," he nodded. He walked over to Sam, who was happily stuffing her mouth with fries.

"Hey pretty blonde," he grinned.

"'Sup?" she replied, as the couple shared a quick kiss.

"I thought you guys had six o'clock reservations for Pini's," Carly said, checking the time. "You'd better leave soon if you want to make it."

"I know, that's why I came over here to get Sam," Freddie told her.

"I'm ready," Sam said, throwing her food wrappers aside. "Come on, Freddison." She grabbed her purse from the counter, and then proceeded to punch Freddie's shoulder. Hard.

Freddie only grimaced, though, and followed after her with a slightly pained expression.

"Um, Sam," Carly frowned. "Why'd you just punch Freddie?"

"Because," she shrugged.

"Don't you think that was sort of…rude?"

"Have you just met me?" Sam laughed. "I'm a rude person!"

"Well, yeah," Carly agreed. "But I thought you were going to try to limit your aggression towards Freddie now that you two are a couple."

"We are," Freddie spoke up. "But we found out that when she doesn't hurt me at all, she takes out her pent up anger in less favorable ways."

"Like what?" Carly asked.

"Like throwing soda at cashiers when they ask her if she'd like to donate a dollar to the elderly," Freddie said.

"Hey, that guy was giving me attitude," Sam said.

"Anyway," Freddie continued. "I figured that in order to avoid her ending up in jail, I should come up with a sort of…arrangement."

"I'm afraid to ask what arrangement this is," Carly said.

"We decided that every Saturday, I get to have three free shots at Freddie," Sam said. "So long as they're not in his face or…_that_ area."

"That way she gets her anger out," Freddie explained. "And nobody else suffers."

"Except you," Carly pointed out. "She's never hit me, but I'm pretty sure Sam hits kind of hard."

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "But it's worth it. Because every time she hits me, shortly after she-"

He was interrupted as Sam pressed her lips to his.

"-Does that," Freddie finished as they pulled away.

"Perfect system," Sam smiled.

"Wow, that's sort of…sweet," Carly grinned. "In its own twisted sort of way."


	100. Chapter 100

_Voter_

"Carly, you're going to get us both killed!" Gibby exclaimed.

"Calm down, will you?" Carly snapped. "We'll be fine."

"But they hate it when you do things like this," he hissed as Carly typed away on Freddie's laptop in the iCarly studio.

"No they don't," Carly said.

"Easy for you to say," he scoffed, crossing his arms. "Sam doesn't hit _you. _She takes everything out on me."

"Gibby, if you're so against this, why are you here?" she sighed.

Gibby frowned. "I don't know…"

"Okay, well, I've got everything set up," Carly said. "Get the camera, Gib."

"You know, my mom's starting to get really upset about these hospital bills."

"You won't end up in the hospital," Carly said picking up Sam's blue remote. "Now start filming!"

"Fine," he said, picking up Freddie's camera. "In 10, 9, 8-"

"You're supposed to start from five!"

"Five what?"

"Just go," she sighed.

"Okay, you're on."

"Hello iCarly viewers," Carly smiled into the camera. "I know you're not too used to seeing me on here all by myself-"

"Ahem!"

"By myself _with Gibby_," she corrected, rolling her eyes. "But I have a very important poll that I need all you iCarly fans to vote on. As all you super fans know, a special date is just around the corner…that's right, it's Sam and Freddie's one year anniversary!"

She pressed a button on Sam's remote and cheers erupted.

"For 365 days, or rather, 366 days, since it was a leap year, Sam and Freddie have beat all the odds and have managed to stay in a relationship without killing each other!"

"Yeah," Gibby said, turning the camera on himself. "And Sam ends up taking all that aggression that she doesn't inflict on Freddie and using it on me!"

"Gibby!"

He turned the camera back towards Carly.

"Anyway," she said. "This Saturday Freddie's going to take Sam out, and all week they've been trying to agree on the place. And even though they're a couple, those two still barely agree on anything, so I'm going to leave it up to you guys to decide. Send me a comment of where you think they should go on their date, and the most popular idea wins! Oh, and if you happen to see Sam or Freddie, don't mention this whole thing, okay? I'll announce the winning idea during next weeks show. So until then, get your…Gib, what do the fans call Sam and Freddie's relationship again?"

"Oh, I know this one; Seddie!"

"Right, right, Seddie," she nodded. "Get your Seddie caps on and think of some cool dates for our favorite web couple!"

"And…done," Gibby said, turning off the camera. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go into hiding, since Sam's going to try to yank my flab off my body for helping you with this."

"Relax," Carly told him. "You're going to be fine."

…..

"Who the heck goes bird watching for an anniversary?" Sam asked, shaking her head in disgust.

"Who goes deep sea fishing?" Freddie shot back.

"I can't believe you guys haven't figured out what you're going to do for your anniversary yet," Spencer said, turning off his episode of _Wet Celebrities. _"It's tomorrow, after all."

"Well all the places Freddie wants go to are lame," Sam said.

"All the places _she_ wants to go to require you to sign a contract saying you won't sue if you get killed!"

"That's quite a conundrum," Spencer said.

"Conundrum?" Sam repeated.

"Yeah, I learned it from my word of the day app," he said proudly. "Anyway, I'm meeting T-Bo at the movies. Later."

"What are you two doing over there?" Sam asked, looking over at Carly and Gibby, who were hunched over Carly's laptop.

"Well," Carly said, standing up. "We happened to just have finished something very interesting…"

"She," Gibby said. "She did it. I had _nothing_ to do with it."

"What?" Freddie frowned.

"Um, well," Carly said. "A few days ago I sort of made a video for iCarly telling people that your one year anniversary was coming up and-"

"You made a video about it?" Sam said. "You know we hate it when you do that sort of stuff!"

"Yeah, we don't like showing off our relationship to the whole world," Freddie said. "It makes it seem so…tacky."

"I told you," Gibby said, turning to Carly.

"Oh come on, what's the big deal?" Carly asked. "And anyway, I just solved your date problems."

"How?" Sam asked suspiciously.

"During the video, I told our viewers to comment with their ideas for places for you guys to go during the date and-"

"Oh God," Sam sighed.  
"The winning idea, by far, was…Indoor Skydiving!"

"Indoor Skydiving?" Freddie frowned.

"I looked it up," Carly said. "There's a place about thirty minutes from here you can go. It looks really fun," she said, looking at Sam. "And," she turned to Freddie. "It's perfectly safe."

Freddie looked at Sam. "Well?"

She shrugged. "I have been wanting to go skydiving. The only time I went was in Japan that one time."

"Oh yeah," Freddie nodded. "At least there will be no plane for you to push me out of this time. So, it's a date?"

Sam smiled. "Shoosh yeah."

Freddie grinned and pulled Sam in for a kiss.

"Aw," Carly laughed. She turned to Gibby. "See, no one got hurt this time."

"I know," he nodded approvingly. "No scars, no abrasions, no bones sticking out of-ow!"

Sam, who hadn't broken away from Freddie, had taken off her shoe and slugged it at poor Gibby.

"Are you okay?" Carly asked, helping him up.

"No!"

…

AN- 100 chapters? I can barely believe it! I just want to thank all the readers/reviewers out there who have helped keep this story alive. You guys are all so great!


	101. Chapter 101

_Kick_

"Freddie, I'm hungry," Sam said to her husband.

"Surprise, surprise," Freddie said.

"Get me food."

"Fine," he sighed, getting off the couch. "What do you want?"

"Hmm…how about some pickles with strawberry sauce and caramel?"

Freddie grimaced. "You and your cravings."

"Hey, I'm pregnant," Sam snapped as Freddie headed to the kitchen. "I'm allowed to eat what I want!"

Freddie chuckled. Sam, who was about five months along, had become accustom to eating strange combinations of food, or rather, more strange than what she usually ate, nearly every day, and as her husband, the job of preparing her meals usually fell on Freddie.

"I don't know how you can eat this," Freddie commented as he spooned caramel onto the plate of pickles. "All I know is that kid's going to come out with an appetite just like yours."

"Do you have a problem with that?"

"No, I'll just probably have to get a second job to feed the two of you," he said, handing Sam her food.

"Mmmm, this is good," Sam said, biting into a pickle. "Good work, Fredison, it's really-" she stopped and got a strange expression on her face.

"What's wrong?" Freddie frowned, concerned. "Are you okay?"

"Freddie," she whispered, putting the plate on the coffee table. "The baby's…moving."

"What?"

"Come here," she said, smiling as she put a hand on her slightly swollen abdomen. "I think it's kicking!"

"Are you serious?" Freddie exclaimed, rushing to Sam's side. He put a hand on her stomach.

"Wow," he said as he felt tiny kicks against his palm. "I feel it."

"This is so cool," Sam said, grinning. "We can actually feel our baby!"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "Just five more months until we can actually see him or her."

"I can't wait," Sam whispered.

"Me neither."


	102. Chapter 102

_Pronoun_

"She, Freddie," thirteen-year old Sam snapped. "I'm a she. As in _girl_."

"Barely," thirteen-year old Freddie scoffed.

Sam was usually the one who's comments left a sting. She was usually the one whose words left a burn. Whenever Freddie would pull the "you're-not-a-girl-you're-a-_that_" card, though, she'd feel knocked down a peg.

It was just a little pronoun. She. How hoard was it for him to realize that sure, she didn't obsess about lip-gloss and skirts like Carly, but that she was still a girl?

Eventually, as the two got older, it was harder and harder for Freddie to deny that Sam was, in fact, a girl. She still preferred converses over heels and watching MMA fights to romantic chick flicks, but when he looked at her, there was an air of feminity to her. And after they had their first kiss, well, he _knew_ she was a girl.

When they began dating at seventeen, and Sam took on the role of his girlfriend, he was slightly surprised about how feminine she was capable of acting. Of course she was still Sam, so naturally she ate more than the average 300 pound man and could flip a truck driver, but she always looked beautiful on their dates, adorning a variety of dresses and even wearing a light layer of make-up. She wouldn't punch him when he held her hand, and he could swear that a blush would creep onto her face whenever he did. And even though she told him that she would punch the lights out of him if he told anyone, she giggled at all of his lame jokes.

Sam was definitely a she.

The prettiest, funniest, best she Freddie knew.


	103. Chapter 103

_Final_

Sam struggled to keep her eyes open as she focused them on her textbook, trying to memorize the many formulas and concepts on the pages. It was the night before her math final, and seeing as she had spent a vast majority of the year sleeping in that class, she didn't exactly have the best idea of the material.

She had been stressed out the whole week of school, taking finals for the rest of her classes. English was the easiest for her. While it was true that she hadn't cracked open any of the assigned books the whole year (who wanted to read about some lady with an A sewn to her clothes anyway?) she was able to compensate with the essay portion of the test, using her talents in writing to bring her grade up to a solid B. Gym was easy enough; run around the gym a couple of times while sneakily tripping Gibby, and she did fairly well on her History final from watching a bunch of war documentaries (which were gory and violent, just the way Sam liked it). Physics was a bit of a struggle, but ever since her Green Week project in ninth grade, Mr. Henning had always put in a good word with all her science teachers, so even though she defined gravity as the square root of pi and Force as the product of temperature and height, she scraped by with a passing D on the test.

Math was the problem, though. It was always her worst subject, even as a little kid. And unfortunately, Sam desperately needed to pass this final or she would be breaking her promise to Freddie.

Two weeks ago, when the rest of the seniors were stocking up on coffee and number two pencils in preparation for their upcoming exams, Sam had announced that she was simply going to wing all of her finals and see how it turned out. Carly of course had been furious, but as she had exams of her own, she only had limited time to scold her best friend. Her boyfriend, Freddie, on the other hand, had put aside his own study time to attempt to reason with her.

"Just because you've already been accepted into Seattle Dance Academy doesn't mean you can just slack off at the end," he told her.

"Why not?" Sam shrugged. "It's not like I need to know cosines and sines and all that junk to dance."

"I know," he had sighed. "But you've worked hard all year. You haven't failed any classes so far and you've even done a few homework assignments. How awful do you think you'd feel if you just gave up at the last minute?"

Sam didn't say anything.

"Just promise me, Sam," Freddie said. "You'll at least try. I know you can pass every exam you take if you do that. Please, for me?"

"That's Carly's line."

"Sam…"

"Fine," she sighed. "I promise, I won't fail any of my finals, you nub."

Freddie had of course helped her a lot. Everyday this week he had dedicated two hours of his time to go through problems with her and made her flashcards to help her memorize the formulas she needed. But now it was two in the morning and he had long since gone back home.

"Sin A/ a is equal to…" Sam muttered, taking a swig of coffee. "Oh yeah, Sin B/b. But wait…is that for a triangle or a trapezoid…?"

….

"That was the hardest final I've ever taken," Carly said as she walked out of class with Sam.

"Yeah," Sam yawned. "Mr. Fishturn's a real jerk. Who sits there and puts 100 questions on one test?"

"Let's just find Freddie and go back to my place," Carly said. "It's summer, after all. We're officially done with high school!"

…

"So, what do you three little graduates want on your pizza?" Spencer asked the trio as they watched a new episode of _Girly Cow_.

"Meat," Sam answered. "Lots and lots of meat."

"Oh no," Carly said, looking at her phone. "Wendy just texted me. Mr. Fishturn just posted our exam grades online."

Sam felt her stomach tighten. Freddie, who had his arm around her, gave her a reassuring smile. "I'm sure you did fine," he whispered as Carly jumped up and ran to the computer.

"I got a C," Carly announced.

"That's pretty good," Freddie told her. "I herd Fishturn gets his problems from college textbooks."

"I guess," Carly said. "I still have a B for my overall grade, though, so that's good. Do you want to check, Sam?"

"Um, sure," Sam said, trying not to sound too anxious. She typed in her information on the computer and pulled up her grades."

"No way!" she exclaimed happily, hardly believing what she saw. "I got a B+ on the final!"

"Wow, Sam, that's awesome!" Carly smiled, hugging her best friend. "I know how hard you studied for that. You deserve it."

"Definitely," Freddie said, wrapping his arms around her and pressing his lips to hers.

"You're the one who helped me a lot," Sam told him.

"You're the one who actually took the test," Freddie replied. "See, Sam, when you apply yourself, you're a genius!"

"Applying myself is so much effort though," Sam whined playfully.

"I think we need to celebrate," Carly said. "Spencer! Cancel that pizza order! We're going to Pini's!"

"Yay! I can see Marty!"

"Hey," Sam said as Carly ran upstairs to get her purse and Spencer hurried to get some clean socks.

"Yeah?" Freddie said.  
"Thanks for pushing me to study," she said. "You're right. I feel pretty good right now; a whole heck of a lot better than I would be feeling if I had failed everything."

"Just think," Freddie grinned. "Now you'll be the only dancer in Seattle who can take limits and use the Law of Sines and all that other math stuff."


	104. Chapter 104

_Club_

"Spencer's going to kill us," Freddie said to Sam as he helped her push the couch out of the way.

"Relax," Sam said, putting down her end of the couch near the counter, leaving a wide empty space in the living area. "Him and Carly won't be back until close to midnight. We'll have everything cleaned up by then."

"And by we, I assume you mean me?" Freddie said.

"Well, yeah," Sam shrugged. "You have everything?"

"Yup," Freddie said, placing a bunch of plastic cups sideways on the floor. "All the equipment for an afternoon of meat golf."

"Where are the clubs?"

"By Bottle Bott," he replied. "You know, Sam, when most couples have the whole afternoon to themselves, they think of things to do besides puttering a ball of meat around all day."

"You're just upset because I beat you last time we played," Sam said, handing Freddie his club.

"The window was open and it blew my meatball away from the cup!"

"Yeah, yeah," Sam said, setting a meatball on the floor. "Now stand back and let Mama show you how it's done." She putted, and the meatball sailed straight into the first cup.

"Lucky shot," Freddie said, placing his own meatball on the ground while Sam did a victory dance. He putted his meatball but it landed a few inches from the first cup.

"Not too impressive Benson," Sam said in a singsong voice.

"It's the stupid club," Freddie insisted. "Switch with me."

"What? No way. I like mine."

"So you don't think you could win with mine?"

"Face it, Fredbear, I could win if I was using a toothpick as a club. I just want this one."

"Why?"

"Mainly because you want it."

"Sam, just let me try with that club," Freddie whined. "This stupid one is costing me the game."

"A poor workman blames his tools," Sam said.

"I told _you_ that!" Freddie exclaimed. "Last week when you said you failed you math test because your textbook's pages were too white to study from!"

"Fine," Sam conceded. "You can have a turn with the club."

"Thank you," Freddie said, reaching for it. "You'll see. I'll-"

"But," Sam said, pulling the club away from his reach. "Let's make things a little interesting."

"Interesting?" Freddie frowned. "You mean bet? Sam, you know we promised Carly we'd stop the bets after you made me sneak into the monkey cage at the zoo. She made us sign that contract and everything."

"Carly's not here, is she?" Sam pointed out. "And I promise I won't make you do anything 'life-threatening'."

"Well…okay," Freddie agreed reluctantly.

"Alright," Sam said. "If when you use the club you don't do any better than you did with yours, you have to take me to that steakhouse that just opened up by the yogurt shop."

"Just the soup at that place costs thirty dollars!" Freddie cried. "Okay, whatever. But if I _do_ do better than-"

"Ha, you said 'do do'" Sam laughed.

"-You have to come with me to my next _Galaxy Wars _fan club meeting this weekend," he finished, rolling his eyes.

"What? That's got to be the lamest thing I've ever heard of! Why do I have to go there?"

"Because none of the other guys believe I have a hot girlfriend," he said. "If I show up with you I could impress the other guys enough to make me president!"

"Whatever," Sam said, shaking her head. She tossed Freddie the golf club. "Let's see what you've got."

Freddie putted his meatball right into the second cup.

"That doesn't mean anything," Sam said as Freddie grinned cockily. "You still have five more holes to get through."

Freddie, however, managed to get hole-in-one's for those as well. Sam slipped up on the third hole and putted a four.

"Well, well, well," Freddie said, crossing his arms happily. "Looks like _someone_ just won _someone's _little bet."

"I-I that wasn't fair," Sam said. "You cheated!"

"How could I have possible cheated?"

"You did," Sam said, throwing her golf club on the floor. "Somehow."

"Uh-huh," Freddie said, putting an arm around her. "Now then, the fan club's meeting is this Saturday at eight."

"Fine," Sam mumbled. "I'll go."

"And we always dress up," Freddie continued.

"You've got to be kidding me."

"I usually go as Nug-Nug," Freddie said. "And I was thinking you could go as Princess Maya in her silver bikini."

"Dream on, nub," Sam said, thumping Freddie on his head.

"Hey, can't blame me for trying."


	105. Chapter 105

AN-Thanks again for all the support I've been getting from you guys with this story, I rally appreciate it. This oneshot is actually a continuation from the last one; hope you enjoy!

…..

_Simulation_

"Thanks again for coming with me, Sam," Freddie said as he drove through Seattle to his _Galaxy Wars _fan club meeting.

"I didn't have a choice; stupid bet," Sam mumbled under her breath.

"Still, thanks for coming," Freddie said. "Although I still can't believe you wouldn't dress up."

"I still can't believe that you can't believe that I won't dress up," Sam said. She looked at her boyfriend's costume. "What are you supposed to be again?"

"Nug Nug!" I've told you a million times!" Freddie exclaimed.

"I know, but it's fun to make you annoyed," Sam smiled.

Freddie rolled his eyes as he pulled into a bookstore parking lot.

"This is where you have these meetings?" Sam asked.

"Yup, a guy in the club's father owns it, and he lets us use the back room," Freddie said.

"Great, a bookstore and _Galaxy Wars_," Sam sighed, getting out of the car. "What a wild Saturday night."

"I know, right?" Freddie said excitedly, oblivious to her sarcastic tone. "Come on, I can't wait for all the other guys to see that I have a hot, blonde girlfriend. I bet none of them have even touched a girl other than their mothers or sisters. They're going to be so jealous!"

"And Carly said this wouldn't be that bad," Sam said as she followed Freddie.

When they got to the back room, Freddie did a fancy knock.

"It's our secret knock," Freddie explained. "It's a reference to the secret association of Jepi."

"When I win I bet, I'm never this cruel," Sam said. "This is just plain evil of you."

"Greetings Nug Nug," a pale, skinny boy with thick glasses said, opening up the door. "We've been waiting for-hey, who's that?"

"This, is my girlfriend, Sam," Freddie said, stepping into the room. "You know, the one you all claimed I made up."

"A real girl?" a large boy wearing a sweat stained T-shirt and some sort of weird hat. "Wow."

"How do we know you didn't just find her somewhere?" asked another one. He stepped over to Sam. "Are you being held here against your will?"

"Absolutely," Sam nodded.

"Sam!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Fine, no," Sam sighed. "I'm his girlfriend. You happy?"

"Why didn't she dress up?" asked the boy who had opened the door for them. "I'm sure she would've made a very nice Princess Maya."

"Yeah, she could've worn the silver bikini!" the second boy said.

Sam twisted his arm into a very painful position.

"Sam, come on," Freddie said, pulling her away from the boy, who was now on the floor withering in pain.

"She hurt my arm!" the boy cried.

"Oh man up," Sam snapped.

"Er, okay," one of the other boys said. "Let's get this meeting going. Lord Radinton, bring it out!"

A boy dressed in a long black cloak and some sort of mask wheeled out two strange looking objects that looked like motorcycle helmets. Sam didn't see what was so special about it, but all the others gasped.

"That's not-" Freddie said. "It can't be."

"The new _Galaxy Wars _Simulation Helmets," the boy said proudly. "A friend of a friend knows the manufacturer. He got us two to test out."

"What are they?" Sam frowned.

"Only the latest in interactive gaming," Freddie answered. "They recreate the Battle of Panthatar so that you can actually be fighting right along side all the action!"

"Battle of what?"

"The Battle of Panthatar is one of the most important battles in the galaxy," one of the members explained, looking disgusted that she didn't know already. He turned to the others. "Can't expect girls to know too much about battles, can you? She'd probably put on the helmet and get dematerialized by a cruiser in less than five seconds."

"Um, Artie, you might want to-" Freddie warned.

"Okay," Sam said, picking up one of the helmets. "Let's see then."

"Wait, what?" Artie frowned, confused. "You-you want to battle me?"

"You got it. That is, unless you're too chicken I'd beat you."

"Of course not," he said, picking up the other helmet. "Let the battle commence!"

"I don't think this is such a good idea," Freddie said, watching his girlfriend and Artie prepare.

In less then two minutes, Artie was proved painfully wrong. Sam's character in the game had defeated him so badly that he was sent back three levels.

"I-I lost," Artie said, taking off the helmet. "To a female who knows nothing of the outside galaxy!"

"Yeah, don't you forget it," Sam said, tossing the helmet onto the couch. Then she walked over and slugged him in the shoulder. "And I can beat you in the real world too."

"Er, I think we should go," Freddie said, grabbing Sam's hand. "See you next week, guys."

"Let me guess," Sam said as they walked back to Freddie's car. "You're going to lecture me on 'the proper way to act in public' again."

"Ordinarily yes, I would," Freddie nodded. "But there was something oddly satisfying about seeing you beat up that guy in the game."

"What?" Sam laughed.

"Let's just say," Freddie said, staring the car. "That you would've made a very hot Galaxy Trooper."


	106. Chapter 106

_Tin_

"Remind me again why I'm here?" Sam asked as her and Freddie headed down to the storage units of Bushwell Plaza.

"Because you want to be nice and help your husband out?" Freddie suggested.

"No, that can't be it," Sam said.

"Maybe it will be fun."

"Yeah, cleaning out your mom's storage unit will be a real laugh," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I can't believe you let her talk you into doing this."

"Come on, it won't take that long," Freddie told her. "Two hours tops."

"Two hours? You expect me to leave our eight-week old son up there with her for two hours?"

"She'll take good care of Jason," Freddie assured her. "She's great with kids!"

"Last week when she watched him she was reading him a book on the dangers of eating too much red meat," Sam pointed out as Freddie unlocked the storage unit. "If Jason grows up and wants to be a vegetarian, I'm blaming it on you."

"Fine, I'll take full responsibility," Freddie sighed. He looked around the cluttered unit. "Where do you want to start?"

"I dunno, just find a corner and grab a trash bag and shove everything into it."

"Sam, we can't just throw everything away," Freddie said, kneeling down next to a large box. "There could be some important memories in here."

"Whatever," Sam said, sitting down next to him. "What's in this box?"

"Um, let's see," Freddie said, rummaging through it. "There's a bunch of old records from when my mom was growing up, some old candles…oh, and what looks like either a dead mouse or a stuffed dog."

"Sure are some great memories," Sam said. She picked up a small tin box that was sitting next to her. "What's in here?"

"Open it and see," Freddie said, still cringing at the contents of his own box.

Sam took off the lid of the tin box and found a large pile of pictures. "Hey," she said, looking at a few. "I think these are you when you were a baby."

"Really?" Freddie said, scooting closer to her. "Wow, I think you're right."

"Aw, here's baby Freddie in his little crib," Sam grinned. "And here's one of you wearing those special little diapers your mom talked about."

"Okay, okay," Freddie said. "I get it. I used to be a baby. Alert the media."

"You know," Sam said, looking at the rest of the pictures. "Jason looks a lot like you used to."

"Jason's blonde," Freddie pointed out.

"I know," Sam said. "But other than that…you mean you don't see it?"

"I guess I do, sort of," Freddie shrugged. "I just always thought he looked more like you."

"He has your eyes," Sam said. "And your nose, and your smile. And look at this picture of you sleeping…Jason does that same thing with his fists that you used to do."

"Guess it's genetic," Freddie laughed. "Hey, where'd you find this tin?"

"Over here," she said. She pulled over another box that was next to where she had found the tin and looked inside. "This one has a bunch of your old baby stuff in it. Wow, I can't believe your mom kept all this for so long."

"Are you really surprised?"

"Well, no," she admitted, going through the contents off the box. She pulled out a doll. "Was this yours?"

"My mom wanted a girl!"

"Uh-huh," she nodded, smiling as she continued digging through the box. "Is this really a toy laptop?"

"Oh I remember that," Freddie said, taking the toy from Sam. "I got it for my third birthday. It used to make animal sounds when you pressed a button on the keyboard. But then my mom got worried that one of the keys would fall off so she took it from me."

Sam pulled out a worn blanket from the box. "Hey, this is in a bunch of those baby pictures."

"I had that thing until I was thirteen-I mean, six," Freddie said.

"Yeah, it looks like it," Sam said. "It's all stained and gross. Your germaphobic mother let her precious son carry this around with him?"

"She washed it a lot, which is why it's so faded," Freddie said. "The stains are probably from baby food that wouldn't come out or paint or something. Like I said, I had that thing for a long time."

"I used to have a blanket that I really loved," Sam said, fingering Freddie's old blanket. "It was yellow with a picture of a duck on it."

"What happened to it?"

"My mom used it to put out her bowl of soup that caught on fire when I was four," Sam answered sadly.

"That's-that's terrible," Freddie said.

"My mom actually felt pretty bad about it, which was surprising, seeing as she did sell my dollhouse to get money for a tattoo. She went out and bought me another blanket that looked just like my old one, but it wasn't the same."

The two continued to go through boxes of Freddie's old baby items for the rest of the afternoon. They had actually completely lost track of time, and it wasn't until Spencer came down that they realized just how long they had been down there.

"Your mother's up there wondering if something fell on you," Spencer told them. "How long have you been down here?"

"Four hours," Freddie said, looking at his watch. "Wow, that went by quickly. I guess we'll just come back and finish cleaning up tomorrow."

Him and Sam stood up and headed out of the storage unit.  
"Wait," Sam said suddenly. She turned back and grabbed Freddie's old baby blanket.

"What are you doing with that?" Freddie asked her.

"For Jason," she said. "Every baby needs a blanket. He might as well have one that reminds him of his dad."


	107. Chapter 107

_Variation_

"Just tell him," Carly said to Sam as the girls sat on the Shay's couch playing balloon tennis.

"No, it's no big deal," Sam said.

"Come on, it's Freddie, he'd do whatever you want," Carly reasoned.

"Yeah, I know, but-"

"What's up, muchachas?" Freddie asked, stepping into the apartment.

"I'm gonna go wash my hair," Carly said, jumping up off the couch.

"Um, okay," Freddie said. He turned to Sam. "Hey, princess."

"Hey," Sam smiled as he leaned down to kiss her.

"So, guess what I have planned for us tonight?" Freddie said sitting down next to his girlfriend.

"Dinner at Pinni's," Sam said at once. "Followed by the latest romantic comedy and then smoothies at the Groovy Smoothie."

"Uh-huh," Freddie said happily. "We should probably leave for Pinni's at six because the movie starts at eight and-"

"Freddie," Sam sighed. "Can we talk?"

"Oh, um, sure," he nodded. "What's up?"

"Well, we've been dating for, what, like ten months, right?"

"Right."

"And well, we've been on a lot of dates during that time."

"Every week," Freddie nodded. "Wait, why are you bringing this up?"

"It's just," Sam said. "Every date's the same thing. Dinner, movie, smoothies. I just think our relationship could use a little…variation."

"Variation?" Freddie repeated. His eyes grew wide. "Variation as in dating other people? Are you breaking up with me? Is this-"

"No, no, I'm not breaking up with you," Sam said quickly.

"Oh," Freddie said, relieved, as his cheeks turned red. "Good."

"I'm just saying that maybe it wouldn't be terrible if we did something a little different."

"Different," he nodded. "Okay. I can do that."

"Really?" Sam said.

"Of course," Freddie smiled. "If that's what you want, I'll do it."

"Thanks," Sam said, wrapping her arms around Freddie's neck. "I love you, nub."

"Love you too," Freddie laughed. He pulled away. "Okay, well, if I'm going to plan a completely new and different date, then I'm gonna have to get started. I'll pick you up here at six?"

"Sounds good," Sam nodded.

….

"So you don't have any idea what he's planning?" Carly asked as she helped Sam zip up the back of her dress.

"Nope," Sam said, sliding on a pair of heels. "None."

"Wow, pretty exciting," Carly grinned.

"I know," Sam nodded. There was a knock at the door.

"Right on time," Carly said as Sam hurried to let Freddie in.

"You look…great," Freddie said when Sam opened the door. "I hope you don't mind me saying that every date, but it's always true."

"You look nice too," she laughed. She grabbed her purse. "See you later, Carls."

"Have fun!" Carly called after them.

"So," Sam said, walking hand in hand with Freddie down the hallway towards the stairs. "Where are we going?"

"Well," Freddie said. "First I got us tickets to see that vicious animal show that's going on in that stadium downtown."

"Really?" Sam said happily. "I love carnivores!"

"And then," Freddie said. "We're going to go get some dinner at that dinner theatre place; they're doing a murder mystery tonight."

"I love those," Sam grinned.

"And finally," Freddie said. "We're going to finish up our night by getting some desert at that fancy chocolate fondue place that just opened up by the art museum."

"You planned all of this today?" Sam asked.

"Uh-huh," Freddie said. "Just for you."

"You're the best," Sam whispered, kissing his lips. "Now come on. Mama wants to see some tigers."


	108. Chapter 108

_Expose_

Freddie was the only person in the entire world who Sam felt she could completely expose herself to. She had never been one to wear her heart on her sleeve; claiming that letting people see your true emotions was for the weak. But with Freddie, it was different. She knew that she could tell him anything, and just be herself when it was the two of them.

Sure, she talked to Carly all the time. They were best friends, after all. But there were times when Sam found it hard to talk to Carly about her own insecurities when she was the epitome of perfection.

And then there was her mom. Granted, ever since they had begun going to therapy on a regular basis their relationship had improved greatly, but it was sort of hard to talk about her own problems with her mother when she had so many going on herself.

With Freddie, though, she didn't have to worry about anything. If she was having a difficult time at school, she would lay her head on his shoulder and just rant for a good hour while he sat there and listened without making a peep as he gently rubbed circles on her palm with his thumb. If she and Carly were fighting, he was the one who she would cry to. No matter what was going on with her, she knew she could come to Freddie.

And once their talks were over, and on some occasions, her tears had dried up, she would turn to him before she left and say, "And you'll never speak of this again, right Benson?"

Freddie would just chuckle and nod and say, "You got it, Puckett."


	109. Chapter 109

_Ethics_

Freddie stood by his locker after school, waiting for Sam. Usually them and Carly met here after school everyday so Carly could drive them home, but since Carly was out sick with a cold today, it was going to be just him and Sam. That was perfectly all right with him; even though they had broken up about a month ago in that elevator, he still enjoyed the moments when it was just the two of them. If felt…nice.

"Hey," Freddie greeted Sam as she stormed over to the lockers. "You ready to-"

Sam threw open her locker door and jammed a bunch of her snacks and papers into her backpack with more than the necessary amount of force.

"Um, bad day?" Freddie frowned.

"I'm suspended," Sam snapped, slamming her locker door shut.

Freddie blinked. "Wait, what? Why?"

"Because," Sam said, crossing her arms. "They're saying that I cheated on my Chemistry test."

"But, you didn't…did you?"

"No!" she exclaimed. "But apparently, there's no other possible way for me to have gotten an A on it while a bunch of other kids failed it; so now I'm suspended for three days."

"Hold on," Freddie said. "Franklin can't be letting this happen. He likes you! He'd never accuse you of doing something you didn't."

"Yeah, well, Franklin's out for a month, remember?" Sam said. "He's on that marriage retreat thing with his wife. Vice principle Gold's in charge now, and he hates me."

Freddie nodded. It was true. In the past year Sam had glued the man's shoes to the floor, hidden his toupee, and filled his car with multiple flavors of jell-o. "That's still not right; it's an abuse of his power!"

"Try telling him that," Sam said angrily.

"You can appeal this," Freddie told her. "Students have the right to challenge any punishment they feel is unjust."

"It wouldn't make a difference," Sam said. Then she shook her head. "Whatever…no school for three days; it'll be sort of like a vacation, I guess."

"Sam-" Freddie started.

"I'll see you around," Sam said, swinging her backpack over he shoulder.

Freddie saw her face just before she turned around. It almost looked like the expression she had right before they had broken up.

He sighed and leaned back against the lockers. He knew what he had to do.

…..

"You can't just barge in there!" Ms. Lemon, the secretary, called after Freddie as he headed towards the principle's office. He didn't listen, though. He threw open the door without even knocking and stepped into the office.

"What are you doing here?" snapped Mr. Gold. "Do you have an appointment?"

"No," Freddie said. "But I need to talk to you about something very important."

"What is it?" he said, frustrated.

"It's about you suspending Sam Puckett."

"Oh, that?" he scoffed. "What about that? You know Ridgeway has a zero tolerance for cheating; it's in the school handbook!"

"I know," Freddie said. "But Sam didn't cheat."

"Please," Gold said, rolling his eyes. "That girl consistently earns D's and C's here. In fact, last year she barely passed her history class."

"But that doesn't mean that she cheated," Freddie said.

"Chemistry is one of the hardest classes this school offers," Gold told him. "She was placed in purely because there was no space for her in any other science class. Our valedictorian last year didn't even get an A in that class. Do you really expect me to believe that that delinquent earned an A on a test in that class without any sort of cheating?"

"Listen, I've known Sam for years," Freddie said, trying to keep his temper down. "Sure, she's mean and rude, and laughs in the face of any school rule, but she _has_ ethics."

"Really?" Gold said, rolling his eyes. "I doubt it."

"Sam's one of the best liars you'll ever meet," Freddie continued. "But she never uses her skills in that. She's honest."

"Oh, of course she is," Gold said sarcastically.

"She is," Freddie insisted.

"Then explain why I have it on record," Gold said. "That in the eighth grade she hacked into the school's data based and changed Ms. Shay's grade in Honors World History? And your grade? _And_ her own?"

"She was doing that because she didn't feel it was right that Carly got a B when she clearly deserved an A!" Freddie exclaimed. "She did it to help a friend! And I bet if you look further down in her record you'll see that she confessed to do doing it."

"Irrelevant," he shrugged. "She still cheated on that Chemistry test."

"No, she didn't!" Freddie cried. "Sam _is_ smart, you know. When she wants to, she can get A's in any class. The problem is that she's sort of lazy; that's the only reason she gets such bad grades. But she actually likes Chemistry! Sure, it's probably only because you get to blow stuff up and all that, but that's the one class she actually enjoys this year! Of course she tries the hardest in it!"

"Mr. Benson, you are getting out of hand," Gold said. "This rant has gone on long enough. My decision to suspend Samantha Puckett is final, and I will not be persuaded to overturn it by a young child!"

Freddie sighed. "Look, I didn't want to have to do this, but you leave me no other choice."

"What are you-"

Freddie pulled a manila folder out of his backpack and slid it across Gold's desk.

Gold opened the folder and gasped. "Where did you get these pictures?"

"That's not important," Freddie said, crossing his arms, satisfied. "But what _is_ important is the fact that I have copies of those pictures and access to a very powerful website that gets over a million views each week."

"Are you blackmailing me?"

"I suppose that's the technical term for it," Freddie nodded. "Now, you either lift Sam's suspension immediately and give her a full apology, or those pics hit the Internet. It's your choice."

"This is an outrage!" Gold exclaimed angrily. "Completely absurd."

"I need a decision," Freddie said, smiling happily.

"Fine!" Gold yelled. "I'll left the suspension! I'll let Puckett know she's allowed back in school and I'll…apologize for saying she cheated."

"Thank you," Freddie said. "That's all I wanted."

He turned to head out of the office.

"Ms. Puckett's certainly lucky she's got such a warped little boyfriend," Gold muttered.

Freddie turned. "Um, er, she's not-"

"Get out of my office!"

Freddie hurried out, and as he did, a tiny smile appeared on his face. But what was it from, he wondered. It couldn't be that he was secretly happy he had been confused for Sam's boyfriend again, was it?

Freddie's smile widened as he thought to himself: _It must be._


	110. Chapter 110

_Wolf_

"When was the last time you cleaned out your room?" Freddie asked Sam as he tripped over a baseball bat that was in the middle of her floor.

"Um, when me and Melanie shared a room," Sam said. "And I didn't clean it, she did."

"Is there even a floor under all of this?" Freddie frowned, looking at the piles among piles of clothes, shoes, papers and assorted snacks that littered the floor.

"Stop with the sarcasm, Benson," she snapped. "That new rug my mom got from her boyfriend's store is going to be here in less than an hour so we have to have enough space to lay it out by then."

"That's going to be impossible," Freddie mumbled. "Tell me again why I'm helping you with this?"

"Because I'm not making out with you until it's done."

"Oh, yeah."

"I'll go find some boxes from the attic," Sam said. "Just start…somewhere."

Freddie sighed as he looked around the room. He imagined his mother would have a heart attack if she knew he was in such an area. He spotted a pile of books by Sam's closet and figured he would start there. Most of the books in the pile were textbooks that looked as though they had never been opened. There were a few notebooks scattered among there as well, all blank, of course, and then there were some novels. He recognized a copy of _The Penny Catcher_, the book that he had bet her she couldn't read all the way through, the fifth volume of _Harry Potter_, and her favorite book, _Boogie Bear III: the Return of Boogie Bear_. Unlike the textbooks, these books actually looked worn, as though they had been read a lot over the years. After he neatly stacked these books, Freddie spotted another notebook. This one wasn't a lined one for taking notes in, though. It was a sketchpad. Freddie opened it up, curious. He knew Sam was a good artist, but he was still surprised at just how amazing these drawings were. There was one of a monkey eating a banana, another one of some pigs, and then another one of a plate of ribs. Chuckling, he flipped the page and saw a drawing of a boy getting chased by what looked like a very hungry wolf. He was just about to flip the page when he noticed that the boy in the picture looked very familiar…and then it hit him: it was him!

"Hey!" Freddie said aloud.

"What?" Sam said, walking back into the room with a bunch of boxes.

"Sam, why'd you draw this?" Freddie asked, showing her the picture.

"I was bored," she shrugged.

"So you daydream about me getting eaten by a wolf?"

"Not eaten, just chased," Sam explained.

"Oh, well, that's better!" Freddie said sarcastically. "Sam, we're dating. You're not supposed to draw elaborate pictures of your boyfriend getting chased by carnivores!"

"Why not? It's pretty funny," Sam said.

"Because, it's like-" Freddie started, but then he stopped.

"Like what?" Sam asked.

"It's nothing," Freddie said. "Come on; let's start cleaning."

"No, not until you tell me what you were going to say," Sam said firmly.

"Fine," Freddie sighed. "It's like-it's like you don't like me."

Sam blinked. "Really? That's what you think?"

"It's stupid," Freddie said. "Can we just forget about it?"

Sam didn't say anything. She took the book from Freddie's hand and flipped through a few more pages.

"Sam, what are you-"

Sam stopped flipping through the pages and handed the book back to Freddie without a word.

Freddie looked down at the picture on this page. It was another picture of him, but in this one, the drawing of Freddie was holding hands with a blonde figure, which could only be Sam. There were a bunch of hearts doodled in the corners of the pages and in a messy scribble that he could barely make out he read _Sam + Freddie_.

"Wow," he said softly.

"I drew the one with the wolf because I was in detention," Sam explained. "And I didn't want those kids that look over my shoulder all the time to see me drawing something soft and girly like that."

"Oh," Freddie said dumbly.

"And you're not allowed to tell anyone about this picture either," Sam said, taking back the book from Freddie.

"I won't," he promised.

"You know I don't not like you, right?" Sam said, looking up at him.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded, smiling. "I know."


	111. Chapter 111

_Choice_

"What do you mean they don't have low fat dressing here?" Gibby exclaimed.

"It's a sports grill, Gibby," Brad explained. "As in a _guys_ place."

"So? Guys can't be concerned about their figures?"

"This is a pretty cool place," Freddie commented, looking around.

"Yeah, I imagine hanging around with two girls all the time doesn't leave much time to do things like this," Brad grinned.

Freddie managed a chuckle. Truthfully, even if he didn't hang out with Carly and Sam all the time, he doubted that he'd prefer this place, with all sorts of sports jerseys and paraphernalia plastered all over the walls, to the Groovy Smoothie.

"Do you think they have diet lemonade here?" Gibby asked, still looking over the menu.

Brad looked at Freddie, who shook his head. "Just get root beer. You like root beer."

"Fine," Gibby said. "But this means I'm going to have to do fifteen more minutes of Cardio with Glenda on my workout DVD tonight." He stood up.

"Where are you going?" Brad asked.

"To the bathroom. Or are you going to tell me they don't have that either?"

"He's…" Brad started as Gibby headed to the back towards the restrooms.

"Strange," Freddie finished.

"Right," he nodded, taking a sip of his soda. "Hey, so I've been meaning to ask you about something I've heard around school."

"Sure, what's up?" Freddie asked.

"Well I heard from a kid in my history class that back in the tenth grade you dated Carly for a little bit. Is that true?"

"Oh, yeah," Freddie nodded. "For about a week. And it's actually a long story, turned out she only thought she had 'those feelings' for me because I saved her from a taco truck."

"Er, okay," Brad said. "So she broke up with you when she realized it wasn't true?"

"Well, it was a sort of mutual break up," Freddie explained. "I told her that she may just be in love with me because I saved her life, and she kind of agreed after that."

"Oh," Brad said. There was a pause, and then he said, "So you've dated Carly _and_ Sam, right?"

Freddie shrugged. "Yeah, I guess I did."

"Wow, two good looking girls," Brad grinned. "Way to break the techy-geek stereotype. I give you major props."

Freddie laughed.

"So can I ask you something?" Brad asked.

"Um, sure?"

"If you had a choice, which girl would you rather get back together with?"

Freddie frowned as he sipped his iced tea.

"Sorry, did I cross over some boundary?" Brad said quickly. "I didn't mean to. I mean, Sam and Carly are both great girls. You don't have to answer."

"It's fine," Freddie said.

It's not like he hadn't thought about it before. He was around those girls every day. Even though Brad was another guy who was into technology and Galaxy Wars like him, he still considered his best friends to be Carly and Sam.

He had kissed both of them. Held both of their hands. Told each one of them they looked nice. Been each of their boyfriends.

Carly was his first crush. She was the first person who talked to him in middle school, since he was new and didn't know too many people.

Sam, on the other hand, was mean to him the second she met him, and though she had tamed a bit since their middle school days, she still had to deliver a hurtful blow to him now and then. But she was also his first kiss. And while he was dating her, he remembered thinking how lucky he was, even during that first week where they always seemed to be fighting.

When he was dating Carly, though, he wasn't exactly _unhappy_, but having her constantly kissing him and coo over him was sort of…awkward. It was almost like dating your sister. In fact, ever since they had broken up, that's how he had thought about Carly.

In the four months since he had broken up with Sam, however, he didn't feel the same type of closure he had felt with Carly. Even though the breakup was mutual (despite what Sam had told everyone), he still felt a slight pang in his chest when they were alone together.

When he held her hand, he felt like he was finally complete. When he kissed her, he saw the proverbial fireworks. And when they stopped, it didn't feel natural, like it was supposed to happen. It felt as if something vital had been taken away from him; as if a part of him had walked out too.

And then suddenly it was clear. He loved both girls, but there was only one who he truly loved in a romantic sense. Only one who he couldn't get out of his mind; only one who he still wanted desperately to be with. Only one blonde-haired demon…

"Freddie? Freddie?"

"Huh?" Freddie said, snapping out of it. "Oh sorry. I was just thinking about-"

"Hey, they have heated toilet seats in there!" Gibby said, running back to the table.

"Dude, are you serious?" Brad said. "I've got to see those!"

He ran off, leaving Freddie with Gibby.

"So what'd you guys talk about while I was gone?" Gibby asked.

"Um, nothing," Freddie said. "Um, I'm gonna go check out those toilet seats…"


	112. Chapter 112

AN- this oneshot is based on the episode that's apparently about Sam and Freddie both working at the Pear Store that's supposed to be coming out within the next few months. It sounded like a really interesting episode, so I figured why not do my take on it before it comes out? Hope you like it, even though I'm sure whatever Dan has planned for it is much better.

….

_Employer_

"So let me get this straight," Freddie said, trying to make sense of this whole situation. "_You_ got the same job I have here?"

"Uh-huh," Sam nodded, sitting on the counter of the Brilliance Bar.

"How?"

"I filled out an application, just like you," she shrugged. "And they hired me."

"So-so you and I are going to be working under the same employer?" Freddie asked nervously.

"Looks like it," she grinned wickedly. "Sounds fun, doesn't it?"

"You're just trying to get me to quit, aren't you?" he frowned, crossing his arms. "You've talked to my mom and the two of you came up with this crazy little plan together, didn't you?"

"Um, I try to have as little contact with that freak show as possible," Sam said. "I just needed a job, and this was the only place hiring that didn't involve manual labor."

"You can't just sit around here and play on the pearpads," Freddie told her. "You have to help customers with their computers and take inventory in the stock room and-"

"Relax, Fredwad," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I'll behave."

"Fine," Freddie said. "The store opens in ten minutes. You'd better be ready by then."

When the doors of the store finally opened, a customer strolled up to the Brilliance Bar.

"Hello, can I help you?" Freddie asked politely while Sam simply gave him a "'sup?"

"Yes," the man said, pulling out his pearphone. "I can't seem to get any text messages or phone calls or send any out."  
"Hmm, have you updated your software recently?" Freddie asked.

"Yes, just two days ago."

"Well let's see if you have any sort of virus," Freddie said, taking the phone and connecting it to a computer. "No, doesn't look like it…I'll run a system check, and if that doesn't work we'll contact your service provider to see if-"

"Let me see," Sam said, picking up the phone.

"Sam, no!" Freddie hissed. "You're going to-"

"It's on airplane mode," Sam said. "That's all. Here, it works fine now."

"Wow, I guess I must've changed it on the settings page," the man said, taking his phone back from Sam. "Thanks a lot, ma'm!"

"I-I was just about to check his settings," Freddie said as the man left the store.

"Sure you were," Sam grinned. "Face it, nub, mama's got some tech skills of her own."

After the workday was through, Sam and Freddie went to the employee area to gather their belongings before they headed home.

"Sam, you can't eat other people's food," Freddie said as Sam rummaged through the fridge that stood by the door.

"Hey, if people leave it, it's fair game," Sam said as she took a chocolate pudding cup.

Freddie sighed as he picked up his backpack. It had been a stressful day. It turned out that Sam was a natural at working at the Brilliance Bar. She was actually fairly tech savvy, and since the majority of their customers had been men that day, she got for more attention from them as they watched her fix their computers with a glazed look in their eyes; something that bothered Freddie, seeing as she _was_ his ex-girlfriend.

"Hey, do we have to work tomorrow?" Sam asked.

"Yes," Freddie said.

"Ugh. You think I could just skip? My cousin has tickets to see this alligator wrestling thing at the zoo."

"No, you can't just skip," Freddie said. "You have to clear absences a week in advance."

"For real? Dude, that's totally jank!"

"That's part of a job, Sam," Freddie said, shaking his head. "You have to be responsible. It takes a lot of-" he stopped talking as he suddenly remembered something. "Holy chiz!"

"What?" Sam frowned.

"I forgot to lock the cash register!"

"Who's responsible now?" Sam said, smiling happily as she ate her pudding.

"The manager gets really upset when we leave it unlocked," Freddie said. "He fired the last guy who did that. Maybe I can get back there before he-"

The door swung open and the manager, a tall, middle-aged man with a beard, walked in. "Alright, which one of you two left the register unlocked?"

"Um," Freddie started nervously. "See, I-I sort of-"

"I did," Sam said. "Sorry about that."

"Ms. Puckett," the manager said. "I have a very strict policy when it comes to my cash register. It was in you employee manual."

"Yeah…I didn't read that," Sam shrugged.

The manager sighed. "I hate to do this, since you seemed to have a real rapport going on with the customers today, but I need to stand by my rules. I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to let you go."

Sam shrugged. "I still get paid for the entire week, right?"

"Er, yes."

"Then whatever," she said.

"All right, Mr. Benson," the manager said, turning to Freddie. "Looks like you'll be pulling double duty tomorrow. Make sure you're here bright and early."

"Uh, yeah, sure," Freddie nodded.

Once the manager left, Freddie faced Sam. "Why'd you do that?"

"I figured you cared more about this job than I did," Sam said. "And, I was probably going to quit in a couple weeks anyway. This job beats working at some fast food joint, but it still involves standing for too long. I only needed to a hundred dollars to pay for some Chinese fireworks, and I got that from today, didn't I? So we're both winners."

Freddie blinked. "Wow. Sam, that was-that was really nice of you."

"Eh," she said nonchalantly. "It's no big deal." She grabbed her bag and turned to head out. Before she stepped through the door, though, she looked back at him. "Despite what you may think; I _do_ care about you."

And with that, she left a very confused Freddie standing alone in the room.


	113. Chapter 113

_Gin_

"Gin!" Sam said proudly, laying down her hand of cards.

"Sam, that's not Gin," Freddie sighed, rolling his eyes at his wife.

"Oh…" Sam said. "Well then I quit."

"Sore loser," Freddie mumbled.

"What was that?" Sam asked.

"Nothing," he said quickly. "What do you want to do know?"

"Watch T.V."

"Yeah, okay," Freddie said. "Only, hey, this just in; the T.V. runs on _electricity_, which, thanks to this snowstorm, we currently have none of."

"Don't give me attitude," Sam snapped. "I'm bored. I need options. At least when the kids are up they at least give me something to do. You're just a nub. What can I do with you?"

"I _did_ suggest something," Freddie reminded her, grinning seductively.

"And I told you I'd do that with you once the power came on and I could feel my hands again," Sam said, rubbing her freezing hands together. "Are you sure there's no more firewood?"

"We used that last log to make a fire for the kids to roast marshmallows," Freddie told her. "Look, if you're so bored and cold, why don't we just head up to bed?"

"Because it's only nine thirty," Sam said. "And I'm not going to become one of those tired old moms who drag themselves to bed that early. I'll find _something _to do."

She got up and headed to the kitchen.

"Like what?" Freddie asked, following her.

"Eating," she said simply, grabbing a loaf of bread and some of the left over marshmallows, along with ketchup and sprinkles.

"That's disgusting," Freddie cringed.

"Good. I wasn't going to offer you some anyway."

"Let me make you something edible," Freddie said, pulling the ingredients away from her. "I'll cut you up some apples and other fruit."

"Do I look like a rabbit?" Sam said, grabbing the food back from her husband. "Let me make my sandwich."

"You're not a teenager anymore, Sam," Freddie argued, taking the food back. "That's going to make you sick if you eat all of it."

"It will not," Sam shot back.

"Um, yeah it will," Freddie nodded. "And then you're going to spend all day tomorrow moaning in bed and leave me with four screaming kids to take care of!"

"Fine," Sam said crossing her arms. "But you know what?" She picked up the bottle of ketchup and squirted it across the counter at Freddie's face.

"Sam!" he exclaimed. "Alright, that does it!" He grabbed the bottle from her, which was pretty easy, seeing as she was doubled over in laughter, and squirted it into her hair.

"You didn't!" Sam cried, her laughter ceasing at once. She turned and picked up the container of maple syrup that was sitting on the stove and emptied half the bottle onto his chest.

"Oh, it's on!" Freddie said, picking up a container of chocolate sauce with quickly found its way all over Sam's face.

"You're not going to win this, Fredbert," Sam said loudly, picking up a half finished jar of grape jelly. She pulled back the back of Freddie's shirt and dumped the contents down his back.

"Come here!" Freddie said, grabbing Sam around the waste, trying hard not to comment on exactly how sexy she looked covered in a wide assortment of foods. Unfortunately, he gave into his urges and crashed his lips hard into hers. She eagerly responded and laced her hands around his sticky neck.

"What are you guys doing?"

The couple broke apart and turned to see their five-year-old twins, Emma and Ashton, and their nine-year-old son, Jason standing at the entrance of the kitchen, looking on at the scene.

"Um, well, see," Sam started. "Mommy and daddy were just playing…a little game."

"How come we didn't get to play?" Emma asked.

"Yeah," Jason nodded. "I want to play!"

"Me too!" Ashton piped in.

Sam and Freddie turned to each other and smiled.

"Okay," Freddie said, picking up the bottle of ketchup. "But you guys asked for it!"


	114. Chapter 114

_Outline_

"Hey, do you guys want to stop at the world's largest sunflower seed on our way up to Webicon next week?" Carly asked. "It's supposed to be pretty cool."

"Um, yeah," Sam said. "Who in their right mind would miss seeing a giant seed?"

"I'll just add that to the outline," Freddie said, nodding as he typed in a few things on his laptop.

"What outline?" Carly asked. "Oh my God, you're not making a complete itinerary for our trip again, are you?"

"What's wrong with that?" Freddie frowned.

Carly turned to Sam. "He's your boyfriend. I'll let you field this one."

"Thanks, Carly," Sam said rolling her eyes.

"You don't think my outline for our trip is a good idea?" Freddie asked Sam.

"Well, it's not that it's not a good idea," Sam said slowly. "It's just that it's a… not non-lame one."

Freddie took a minute to decipher that sentence before he responded. "Come on! It's a very non-lame idea! You guys just never got to see my last itinerary in action because I made that one back when Nora kidnapped us."

"Okay, but do we even really need an itinerary?" Sam asked him. "We get into Olympia on Friday, head to the hotel, and then the next day spend all day at Webicon and then go back to the train station to come home. Big deal."

"But see, I organized what we will do with all of our free time," Freddie defended. "Look, we get into Olympia at three in the afternoon, but our rooms won't be ready until seven, so I have it down that we'll shop at that big mall from three fifteen to five, drive over to that sushi place and stay there until six thirty, and that gives us just enough time to grab some ice cream from Dairy Heir before we go to the hotel. Perfect plan!"

"But what if we decide we don't want to go to the mall?" Sam pointed out.

Freddie frowned. "Why wouldn't we go to the mall?"

"Or what if we find a different restaurant? Olympia is supposed to have all sorts of steakhouses, and I'm not about to pass up a 20 ounce steak for raw fish."

"I…_guess_ I would just…_change_ the outline," Freddie said hesitantly. "The carefully crafted outline."

"Baby," Sam sighed. "Can't you just not make the outline? For me?"

"But Sam, our trip won't have any structure then!"

"So what? That'll just make it more fun! This is going to be our last year to go to Webicon by ourselves before we all go off to college next year. Spencer's not coming _and_ your mom lost her cell phone at that germ awareness festival so she can't even call and pester you. We can do whatever we want!"

"I never thought of it like that," Freddie said slowly. "When you put it like that it does sound sort of fun."

"Right?" Sam grinned. "So can I delete the outline now?"

"Sure," Freddie smiled, handing Sam his laptop. "Go ahead. I guess we'll just be three crazy, spontaneous teens in Olympia…now I'm thirsty. Do you have soda, Carly?"

"It's all diet," Carly said as Freddie got up and headed to the kitchen. She turned to Sam. "Nice work."

"Like I was going to listen to his outline," Sam said as Freddie got up to get some juice. "You'd think after a year of dating I would've had more of an impact on the nub."

"Gross, Carly!" Freddie called from the kitchen, spitting out the soda he had been drinking. "This is diet!"

Carly shook her head. "Believe me, you have."


	115. Chapter 115

_Dictionary_

"I can't believe Carly ditched us to go see a movie with that new guy," Sam mumbled.

"She really likes him," Freddie reasoned. "Besides, she _did_ ask us if we minded. You told her to go ahead."

"She's a girl, she's supposed to know that really means that I _do _mind."

"You're just being difficult," Freddie said, shaking his head. "Besides; this gives us time to be alone."

"Yeah," Sam said to her boyfriend. "But I'm still getting over that sore throat, so we can't kiss or anything without me giving you some disease."

"Come on," Freddie said, placing his Scrabble tile on the board they were currently using to play on the Shay's living room floor. "This game is fun. See, I just got 'fiduciary' for 47 points."

"Sure, it's a real blast," Sam said sarcastically, rolling her eyes. She looked at her own tiles. "There," she said, laying out her own tiles. "'Zapateado'. 62 points; hey I'm winning now!"

"Zapateado isn't a real word!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Yes it is," Sam defended. "It's fiduciary that's not a real word, but you don't see me complaining."

"Fiduciary is a real word, Sam," Freddie sighed. "We just learned about it in economics last week."

"Really? Must've been asleep," Sam shrugged. "But anyway, Zapateado is a real word."

"No it isn't!"

"Yes it is, dipthong."

"What's it mean then?" Freddie asked, crossing his arms.

"It's a type of dance," Sam said.

"Please," he scoffed. "What kind of crazy dance is named that?"

"Since when did you become an expert in dance Mr. I-Trip-Over-My-Own-Two-Feet?"

"Anyone could tell you that it isn't a word, and therefore can't be a dance," Freddie said. "In fact, I'll prove it." He got up and headed to the bookshelf by the stairs.

"Why do you have to be such a nub?" Sam said, rolling her eyes as she got up to stand by him.

"Because I'm right," he said, flipping through the pages. "Ah, see, here are the Z's. And see, there's no…oh."

"I'm sorry, my vision's a little fuzzy," Sam said, clearly enjoying this. "What's that word down there say?"

"Zapateado," Freddie read glumly. "A Spanish or Latin American dance involving rhythmic tapping of the feet."

"Weird that a word that's not a word would be in the dictionary, huh?"

"Fine," Freddie said, closing the dictionary and cramming it back on the shelf. "You got the 62 points for the word. Let's go back and play."

"Oh no," Sam said, grabbing her boyfriend's arm. "It's not going to be that easy."

"Sam," Freddie moaned. "Please don't make me do anything crazy."

"What? Just because I was right and you were at wrong at something academic?"

"Fine, you want me to admit it?" Freddie said. "You were right and I was wrong. Happy?"

"Yes, actually," Sam nodded. "I am. And I'll be happier after you buy a smoothie."

"That's all you want?" Freddie laughed. "Okay. I always buy your smoothies anyway. Come on, we'll go down there now."

He held out his hand for Sam to take but Sam ignored it and jumped onto his back.

"What are you doing?" Freddie cried, his knees shaking a little under the sudden addition to his body.

"Well you didn't think I was going to walk all the way down there, did you?" Sam frowned. "Now move, baby. There's a strawberry kiwi splat with my name on it waiting for me!"


	116. Chapter 116

_Exhibit_

"Please?"

"No! For the millionth time, no!"

"What are you fighting about now?" Carly asked as Sam and Freddie stormed into her apartment, no doubt coming to her to settle yet another argument. Honestly, she might as well put a couple's counseling sign on her door and be done with it.

"Freddie's trying to drag me to some train exhibit tonight," Sam said. "And I obviously don't want to go."

"You'll have fun!" Freddie said.

"How can I possibly have fun if I'm too busy dying of boredom?"

"Carly, can't you talk to her?" Freddie pleaded to his friend. "Tell that it's important for her to take a part in my interests or something like that?"

"I dunno, Freddie," Carly shrugged. "I mean, Sam's either going to sit there and pout the whole time or wind up rigging one of the trains on exhibit to go up in flames or something."

"Exactly!" Sam nodded. "It would be better for everyone if I just _don't go_."

"Why can't you just go to the train exhibit thing by yourself or with one of your guy friends?" Carly asked.

"First of all," Freddie said. "My 'guy friends' consist of Gibby and Brad. Oh, and I guess Spencer. But Brad's at some bake off with his grandma, Spencer's at the Mexican ballet, and Gibby has some sort of phobia with trains. He thinks they're all out to kill him."

"Then go by yourself," Carly replied. "Have a little Freddie time."

"No!" Freddie exclaimed. "The main reason I want to go to this exhibit is because of this." He pulled out a pamphlet from his pocket and showed it to the girls.

"The love train?" Carly read.

"Oh my God," Sam said. "That _cannot_ be a real thing."

"It's on exhibit for the first time ever," Freddie explained. "It's the train where this Russian princess went on her first public outing with the Russian prince. We could actually sit in the seat where they were sitting! It's supposed to bring good luck to any other couple who sits there."

"Wow, that actually sounds sort of sweet," Carly said. She turned to Sam. "Doesn't it sound sweet?"

"Isn't Russia the place with all the guys with long beards?"

"I guess," Freddie shrugged. "So?"

"I'm not really a fan of beards."

"What's that have to do with anything? It's not like I'm going to all of the sudden spurt a beard when we go."

Sam sighed. "You really want to go? Just to sit in this love train or whatever?"

"How many guys get to say they've taken the most beautiful girl to the most romantic train in existence?"

"Aw!" Carly cried. "Sam, you go with him or I'll singe handedly drag you there with him myself!"

"Get a grip," Sam said, shaking her head at her best friend, though a small blush was creeping onto her chin. She turned back to Freddie. "I'm assuming there's food at this thing, right?"

"Of course."

"Well," she said. "I guess if this place ends up being completely lame I'll at least get some food out of it."

"So you'll go?" Freddie grinned.

"Yeah, I'll go," Sam sighed.

"Yes!" Carly cheered.

Sam and Freddie looked at her.

"What? You know I'm a sucker for romance."

…..

It was past midnight and Carly was just about to head to bed. She flicked off the T.V. and got up just as there was a knock at the door.

"Sam?" Carly frowned, looking through the peephole and opening the door. "What are you doing here? Did you have fun at that train exhibit with Freddie?"

"Yeah, I did," Sam grinned.

"See? Now aren't you glad you went?"

"Uh-huh," Sam said. "Really glad." She held out her hand. On her ring finger was a sparkling diamond ring.

"Oh my God!" Carly exclaimed. "Is that-? Did he-? Are you-?'

"Uh-huh," Sam nodded excitedly. "I'm getting married! He proposed in that love train!"


	117. Chapter 117

_Ceiling_

"-And then Gary pulled that old 'It's not you, it's me,' line on me," Carly said. "I mean, really? That's the best excuse he could come up with?"

Sam was laying on Carly's bed, staring up at the ceiling. For the past several hours, Carly had been ranting about her ex-boyfriend, Gary, who had dumped her earlier that day. After the breakup, Carly had called Sam, who had of course came over right away. And even though she _was_ trying to be supportive for her best friend, she was getting a little bored.

"He was a jerk, Carls," Sam said for about the twelfth time that day. "You should be glad you're done with him. You can find some new guy, now."

"Oh, do you remember that time last month when he forgot my birthday? You remember what excuse he used then?"

"Yes, Carly, I was there," Sam said, but Carly didn't seem to hear her, and launched into another long escapade.

Sam sighed and stared back up on the ceiling, looking at the markings.

"You know," Carly said after she had finished her lengthy story. "I think it's got to be boys. They're just so stupid! _That's_ the problem!"

"Well, yeah," Sam nodded. "Everyone knows that."

"They're just the worst," Carly exclaimed. "They're mean, they're smelly, they're gross…and mean!"

"You, um, said mean twice-"

"Because they're doubly mean! You know what, I'm swearing off boys," Carly said firmly, crossing her arms. "From now on, I fly solo."

"Carls, come on," Sam said, sitting up. "Don't be crazy."

"I'm serious," Carly said. "I go through this with every guy!"

"Well not every guy," Sam pointed out. "Let's be honest, you've broken quite a few hearts yourself, Shay."

"But I'm _nice_ about it!" Carly said. "And I've only broken up with Griffin and like two other guys."

"Look, Carls, you shouldn't swear off dating just because of a few jerky guys," Sam said. "I mean, you're Carly. I think flirting with any cute guy you see if a reflex."

"Well it's going to stop. And you want to know why? Because boys are terrible creatures put on this planet to be-"

"Hey, muchachas," Freddie said, walking into the room. "How's it-"

Sam tried to signal him to leave, but he didn't get the message.

"Oh, and look who it is," Carly said. "One of them!"

"One of who?" Freddie frowned, clearly confused.

"The Despicable Scabs of Humanity!"

"Oh…what?"

"She's in her boy hating mode right now," Sam explained to her boyfriend. "I'd leave if I were you. She might not be very strong, but you know how she gets when she's all fired up."

"Right," Freddie nodded, understanding. "I'll call you later then. Feel better, Car-"

"Yeah, he'll call you Sam," Carly said sarcastically. "Or maybe he'll find something better to do and just leave you hanging!"

Sam sighed and fell back down on the bed. It was going to be a long night.

"How many times have you forgotten her birthday, Freddie? Or didn't notice when she did her hair different, or told her how nice she looked on your dates? Hmmm?"

"Carly, chill," Sam said. "You want to go beat up Gary's car?"

"Oh…that does sound nice," Carly said, calming down a bit.

"Then grab your jacket," Sam said, getting up off the bed.

"I'm sorry I attacked you like that, Freddie," Carly sighed, pulling on her jacket.

"It's cool," Freddie said. "That Gary was a real loser. You'll find a better guy."

"No I won't, because I'm swearing off guys."

"Huh?"

"Maybe I'm not meant to have anybody," Carly shrugged. "I've never had a relationship longer than two months. I mean, look at you guys! You've been together for almost two years! Don't get me wrong, I'm so happy for you, and I think you're an awesome couple, but well, I've always been sort of…jealous of your relationship. I just want something like what you have, is that so wrong?"

"You _will _find someone to have that kind of relationship with," Sam said, patting her best friend's shoulder. "Look, I know you think guys are all horrible right now, but trust me, there's someone for you. Look at all the jerks I dated! Jonah, Pete, that guy from juvie…they were all just like Gary was to you. But then…well, I guess I had some sort of mental breakdown and started dating this one."

"Love you too," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"And in the two years that we've dated, he's never acted like a jerk once," Sam continued, ignoring her boyfriend. "Sure, he's a nerdy nub, obsessive, sort of stingy, has a freak show of a mother-"

"You do realize I'm still in the room?"

"But even with all that, I love him," Sam finished. "And you're going to find someone you love too. You can't just let all the wrong guys get in the way."

"Wow," Carly said. "You sure know how to give one heck of a pep talk, Sam."

"Hey, Mama knows what she's talking about," Sam shrugged.

"You're right," Carly said. "And you know what, I don't have to give up on guys. Maybe if I just stop lusting after every one I see, though, I'll have better luck finding-"

"Um, excuse me?" a pizza delivery boy said, knocking on the doorframe. "I have your pizza. I knocked downstairs, but no one answered and the door was unlocked, so I just came in. I hope that's okay."

"That's perfectly okay," Carly said, batting her eyelashes and hurrying over to the delivery boy. "Thanks so much for bringing it all the way up here. It must've been hard carrying it up all those stairs."

"I actually took the elevator."

"Oh, well, it still was nice," Carly laughed. "I'm Carly, and you are…?"

"Blane."

"Blane, what a great name!" Carly said. "Why don't I walk you downstairs, Blane?"

"Well, her 'no guys' policy lasted long," Freddie said as Carly and Blane headed out of the room.

"You're surprised?" Sam laughed. "I knew she'd never go through with it. I'm just upset that we probably won't get to wreck Gary's car tonight. Come on, I'm hungry and stupid Blane took the pizza with him."

"Yup," Freddie said, heading out of the room with Sam. Before they went downstairs though, he took her hand. "Hey, you know I love you too, right?"

"Yeah," Sam grinned, standing on her toes to kiss him. "I know."


	118. Chapter 118

_Kill_

"Dude, this has got to be the most pointless show on television," Spencer said, watching the screen.

"What? How can you say that?" Gibby exclaimed.

"The mouse just turned into a butterfly," Freddie pointed out. "How does anything in this show even make sense?"

"He drank that butterfly potion," Gibby said, shaking his head at the other two.

"If I had the energy to get up and get the remote to change the channel, I would," Spencer said.

"How long have we been sitting here?" Freddie yawned, eating a handful of popcorn.

"Eleven hours," Spencer replied. "A new record."

"Sweet," Gibby grinned.

A commercial came on, interrupting the show.

"Man, right at the good part," Gibby sighed. He pulled out his pearphone. "Hey, look at this new app I downloaded this morning. It's this singing calendar. See, I entered in today's date and-"

"What?" Freddie said suddenly, grabbing the phone out of Gibby's hand. "It's the thirteenth today?"

"Yeah, why?" Spencer frowned.

"It's mine and Sam's anniversary!" Freddie said, jumping up, throwing Gibby his phone back. "I was supposed to meat her at The Boiling Pot at six and it's already-" he looked down at his watch. "Five forty-seven!"

"Wow, she's going to kill you if you're late," Gibby commented.

"Yeah, especially on your anniversary," Spencer nodded.

"I know that, thanks," Freddie snapped. "Man…you think I could borrow a shirt and tie, Spence?"

"Yeah, go grab one," Spencer nodded. "Hurry!"

"Get some shoes from him too," Gibby said, looking at Freddie's sneakers. "The Boiling Pot is a classy place."

Within three minutes Freddie was all changed.

"I'm taking these," Freddie said, grabbing the roses from a vase on Spencer's counter.

"Hey! Those were from Socko's grandmother!" Spencer called after Freddie as he ran out the front door.

The Boiling Pot was about twenty-five minutes away, but going well above the speed limit, Freddie managed to get there in fifteen. When he pulled into the parking lot he looked at his watch. 6:08. Crab, he was still late. Getting out of his car he ran up to the restaurant. Sam was probably already sitting at their table, plotting many painful ways for him to pay for his tardiness. He had just entered the restaurant was about to approach the greeter when the restaurant door opened again and Sam ran in, flustered and out of breath.

"Hi," she said, starting over to him. "I'm so, so, so sorry I'm late. I was with Carly at the smoothie and we kind of lost track of time."

Freddie blinked, unsure how to handle this change of events. "Um, it's okay," he said.

"No, it's not," Sam said. "Sure, it's not a big deal when I'm late for our regular dates, but this one was supposed to be special."

"Well, yeah, but it's not the end of the-"

"Tell you what," Sam whispered in his ear as she leaned up to kiss him. "Tonight after dinner, we'll go back home and do whatever you want."

Freddie grinned. Well, he was a guy, after all…

"I _was_ starting to get worried about you," Freddie said. "But hey, I guess I can forgive you."


	119. Chapter 119

_Delight_

"What are we doing daddy?" Freddie's five-year old daughter, Emma, asked him.

"Well," Freddie said, grabbing a box of cake mix from the kitchen cabinet. "Since we burned mommy's mother's day breakfast-"

"But she said she still liked it," Ashton, Emma's twin, interrupted.

Freddie chuckled. He knew Sam had to force herself to choke down the completely blackened pieces of toast and very hard scrambled eggs the kids had brought her in bed. They had also burned the bacon too, but to Sam, bacon was bacon. Maybe leaving the kids in charge of breakfast while Freddie tried to wrap Sam's mother's day present hadn't been a good idea.

"Yeah, she did," Freddie nodded. "But I still think that maybe it would be fun to make mommy a special mother's day cake."

Looks of pure delight spread over the twins' faces. "Do we get to help?" Emma asked excitedly.

"Well she _is_ your mom," Freddie smiled. "Go get your brother and we'll start making it."

"Jason!" Ashton screamed.

"I could've done that," Freddie sighed. These kids definitely had their share of Sam's genes in them.

"What?" Freddie and Sam's nine-year old son asked, coming into the kitchen.

"Want to help us bake mom a cake?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah!" Jason exclaimed.

"Okay," Freddie said, reading the back of the box. "Emma, you'll be in charge of stirring-"

"No fair!" Ashton cried. "I want to stir daddy!"

"Too bad!" Emma said, sticking her tongue out at her sister. "I am!"

"But I should get to! I'm older!" Ashton pouted.

"By eight minutes; it doesn't count!"

"You can take turns stirring," Freddie said, breaking up the fight. "Jason, you can crack the eggs and-"

"But how come they get to stir and I don't?" Jason frowned.

"You can stir too!" Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Go get three eggs from the fridge right now, though. Okay, Em, pour the mix into the bowl. Ash, fill this cup with water and pour it in after Emma pours in the mix."

"I can't see the eggs!" Jason yelled across the kitchen, standing in front of the open fridge.

"Jason, shh!" Freddie hissed. "Or you'll wake-" He was cut off by a loud wail.

"Tyler's up!" Ashton announced.

"Yeah, thanks," Freddie sighed. "Okay, just do what I told you to do and I'll be back in a sec."

Freddie ran upstairs to his and Sam's youngest child's room. Tyler was standing up in his crib, crying to be picked up.

"What's up, buddy?" Freddie said, picking up his son. "You hungry? I think mommy left some bottles in the fridge…"

He walked back downstairs with Tyler in his arms. Just as Freddie reached the foot of the stairs, though, he heard a loud crash from the kitchen.

"Perfect," he mumbled as he made his way back towards his other children.

"It was Jason's fault!" Ashton said as soon as Freddie came into the kitchen.

"No it wasn't, it was Emma who did it!"

"What happened?" Freddie asked, but his question was answered once he saw the bowl that once held the cake batter on the floor, the contents oozing out.

"I didn't do it daddy!" Emma said. "It was-"

"I don't care who did it," Freddie said quickly, placing Tyler in his high chair. He looked at his watch. "Okay, mommy's going to be back from that spa place she went to with aunt Carly in less than an hour. Here," he handed each of the kids a rubber spatula from one of the kitchen drawers. "Just scrape the batter back into the bowl. I mopped in here last night."

While the kids scraped the batter back into the bowl Freddie grabbed a bottle from the fridge and gave it to Tyler. Once the kids had the batter they could salvage back into the bowl, Freddie poured it into the cake pan and placed it into the oven. In forty minutes the cake was out and cooled, and each of the kids were now busily icing their creation, getting heaps of icing on the counter and onto their clothes.

_How does Sam deal with these kids all day? _Freddie asked himself as he sponged the spit-up off of Tyler's onsie. _I love them and all, but they're just horrible sometimes. _

"Do we get to put candles on the cake?" Emma asked, licking the icing off of her knife before dipping it back into the container again.

"That's only for birthdays, sweetie," Freddie said. "You guys done?"

"Yeah, isn't it pretty?" Ashton asked.

Truthfully, with its uneven icing job and obvious fingerprints, Freddie thought the cake looked very unattractive.

"Very pretty," he nodded.

"Can I go get some of my _Galaxy Wars _action figures to put on it?" Jason asked, spooning a large clump of icing out of the container with his hand.

"You know mom would kill me if I let you do that," Freddie said, taking the icing container away from his son. "Now you three go change before-"

Suddenly they heard the front door open.

"Hey, Sam," Freddie said, greeting his wife with a quick kiss. "How was the spa?"

"I got to sit in a tub full of mud," Sam said. "So it was pretty cool. They only had these weird teas there, though, so I'm starving."

"We made you a cake, mommy!" Ashton said happily, running up the her mother and hugging her leg, leaving a large icing stain on Sam's jeans.

"You did?" Sam smiled.

"All by ourselves," Emma said proudly.

"Daddy made you guys do all the hard work, huh?" Sam laughed, grinning at Freddie.

"I did the most," Jason said.

"No you didn't!" Emma retorted.

"Did too!"

"Everyone helped equally," Freddie said.

"Can we have some now?" Ashton asked.

"Sure," Sam said. She looked over at the counter, which was a complete wreck.

"We had…a little accident while we were making it," Freddie whispered.

"Well, it's my day," Sam shrugged. "_I'm _not cleaning it up."

"You know, the kids don't make disasters like this on father's day," Freddie mumbled.

"Of course not," Sam said. "Because I'm in charge."


	120. Chapter 120

**AN- I got some requests to do a father's day fic since I did a mother's day fic last chapter. So even though mother's day is really just next week, I'm still going to post it! Enjoy!  
…..**

_Handful_

"One of you start stirring this," Sam yawned, placing a bowl of waffle batter in front of her twin daughters.

"Me!" Ashton exclaimed, grabbing the spoon.

"Mommy, _I _wanted to do it," Emma frowned, crossing her arms.

Sam rolled her eyes. It was seven thirty in the morning; _far_ too early for dealing with any arguments.

"Em, you can help me wrap daddy's present," Sam said. She grabbed the bag that contained a new laptop case from the counter and handed it to Emma. "Here. There's paper in the living room."

Emma's eyes widened. "I really get to?"

"Yeah, go wild," Sam nodded. She watched as Emma excitedly ran from the room. "That whole roll of wrapping paper's going to be gone," she muttered.

"Mom, I'm done with my present for dad," Jason said from the kitchen table, looking up from Sam's laptop, which he had been working on.

"How's it look?" Sam asked.

"Really cool," Jason replied. "I used that new program dad gave me last week to make a simulation of the Battle of Gilato from _Galaxy Wars_. He said it was his favorite battle, you think he'll like it?"

"Yup," Sam sighed. _A computer slash Galaxy Wars enthusiast,_ Sam thought to herself. _Wonder where he gets that from…_

"Can I help with the breakfast too?" Jason asked.

"Um, sure," Sam said. "Why don't you make dad some coffee?"

"But I don't know how to use the coffee maker," Jason said.

"Just put a handful of coffee beans from the bag next to it into that top part and press the red button," Sam explained.

"Put the coffee in the cup I painted for daddy!" Ashton called across the kitchen. Sam looked over at her daughter and saw that her entire face and a good portion of her long blonde hair were covered in chocolate sauce.

"Ashton, what did you do?" Sam asked, grabbing a sponge.

"I like chocolate waffles better," the five-year old said simply.

"Yeah, so do I," Sam smiled, wiping off Ashton's face. "Good thinking. Next time, try to get more in the bowl though."

After she quickly finished wiping off Ashton and the table, Sam poured the waffle batter into the iron. She opened up a package of bacon and placed it in the frying pan just as she heard a whimper from her youngest child, Tyler.

"Aw, you want to help with father's day too?" Sam said, kissing the top of the infant's head. She grabbed Freddie's father's day car and a crayon and placed it on the tray of Tyler's highchair. Tyler grabbed the crayon and instantly began scribbling on the card.

"Ashton, make sure he doesn't put the crayon in his mouth," Sam said, walking back over to the stove. The bacon was nearly done and the kitchen was beginning to smell of chocolate waffles. Sam was just getting ready take the waffles out of the iron when Jason cried, "Mom, something's wrong with the coffee machine!"

Sam turned around and saw a flood of coffee spilling over the counter onto the floor.

"How much coffee did you put in here?" Sam asked, nearly slipping on the puddle of coffee as she unplugged the coffee maker. "I told you only one handful."

"But it didn't look like a lot, so I put in three more handfuls," Jason said. "Are you sure it's not just the coffee machine that's broken?"

"The coffee machine is fine, Jason," Sam said, carefully picking up the coffee mug, which was filled to the brim. "Okay, you get some paper towels and clean this up while I finish up with the food."

"Mommy," Emma said, walking into the kitchen with an extremely sloppily wrapped present in her arms and half a roll of tape stuck in her hair. "I need help."

"Come here," Sam said, scooping the waffles out of the iron and onto a plate. She managed to extract a much tape as she could from Emma's hair without pulling too hard. "I'll get the rest out after we bring daddy up his breakfast," Sam said. She looked at pearphone. It was nearly eight now, and she was sure Freddie had woken up with all the commotion and was now sitting in bed.

"Okay, Ashton, grab a tray from the cabinet," Sam ordered. "Emma, pour a little bit of milk into the coffee."

In five minutes, Sam had arranged the tray with a plateful of chocolate waffles and bacon and a steaming cup of coffee. She looked around at the kitchen, which had finally been clean of the coffee disaster and smiled. _That's how mama does it, _she thought to herself.

"Emma, you carry up the present, Ashton, grab the card and the laptop," Sam said, picking up Tyler.

"I get to carry the tray?" Jason asked hopefully.

"Why does he get to?" Ashton frowned.

"Yeah, that's not fair!" Emma exclaimed.

"Jason gets to carry Tyler," Sam said, placing the baby in his hands. "_I'll_ carry the tray. Okay people, let's move!"

The five headed upstairs to Sam and Freddie's bedroom, where Freddie was sitting in bed watching some morning talk show.

"Happy father's day!" the kids said, throwing open the door and jumping onto the bed.

"Oh, wow!" Freddie grinned, clicking off the T.V.. "Is that a father's day breakfast I see?"

"We made it!" Emma said, settling herself on Freddie's lap. "And I wrapped the present!"

"Happy father's day, nub," Sam said, putting down the tray and giving her husband a light kiss on the lips.

"Thanks," Freddie smiled.

"That's gross," Jason cringed. "Dad, look what I made you on mom's laptop! It's a simulation of the Battle of Gilato! You should see how cool the graphics look!"

"The Battle of Gilato?" Freddie repeated. "That's my favorite battle!"


	121. Chapter 121

_Clue_

"Carly?" Freddie called, walking up the steps to Carly's bedroom. "Carly? You here?"

He opened the door and instead of seeing Carly, he saw Sam, laying on the ice cream sandwich loveseat, watching some Spanish program.

"Hey," Freddie greeted her. "Where's Carly?"

"Out," Sam replied, not looking over to him.

"Out where?" Freddie asked, sitting down on the pink sofa next to her.

"I don't know," Sam snapped. "Wherever Kurt decided to take her."

"She's on a date?"

"Yes," Sam said. "She's out with her third guy this month."

Freddie shrugged. "Oh. I just came over to see if she wanted to study for our Trig test tomorrow. I'd ask if you wanted to study together, but I'm guessing that would be a no, right?"

"Right," Sam replied, turning up the volume of the T.V.

Freddie frowned. "Um, you don't speak Spanish."

"As far as you know," Sam said.

"I do know," Freddie said. "Because when we used to go out, you made me stop doing my little Spanish outbursts because it bothered you when I said things you didn't understand."

"So I can't learn now?"

"Well, sure, you can," Freddie said. "Although it's best to learn a second language between the ages of three and seven, according to research. Besides, I don't think a Spanish soap opera like this is the best way to pick up the language."

"There was nothing on, okay?" Sam exclaimed. "Jeesh, can't I just watch T.V. without getting some big lecture from you?"

Freddie blinked. "Are you okay? You seem sort of upset."

"Gee, what was your first clue?" Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Well, you don't have any sort of food by you, and you always do when you're watching T.V., and-"

"Oh my God, you're unbelievable," Sam said, shaking her head.

"Well…what's bothering you?" Freddie asked.

"Nothing."

"But you just said-"

"It's, Carly, okay," Sam said.

"Why? Did you two have a fight?"

"No, not really," Sam sighed, playing with a loose string on her jacket.

"Then what's going on with you two?"

"Look, you're the last person I really want to talk to about this," Sam said.

"Sam," Freddie said. "We're friends. You can tell me."

"Fine. It's just-" Sam started. "It's just…Carly told me that she was positive Kurt liked me."

Freddie felt his intestines clench a little bit. "Oh?"

"Yeah. She said that she was sure he was really into me and was going to probably ask me out soon," Sam said. "But then tonight when we were hanging out, Kurt calls Carly and asks her if she wanted to catch a movie and go out for ice cream afterwards."

Freddie nodded. "Wow. That's rough."

"I mean, Carly _did_ ask me if I was okay with it," Sam said. "But come on! What was I supposed to say to her?"

Freddie didn't say anything.

"It's not like I even liked him or anything," Sam muttered. "If he _had_ asked me out, I would've said no."

Freddie perked up a little bit at this information.

"It's just," Sam sighed. "I thought, for like, a minute, that for the first time, somebody actually liked me more than her."

Freddie felt a pang of sympathy for her. She had a point; she always did seem to get overshadowed by Carly.

"Pretty dumb, right?" Sam said softly.

"No," Freddie said at once. "Sam, plenty of people like you more than Carly."

"Name one person," Sam said.

"Me."

Sam looked up. "You?"

"Carly's one of my closest friends," Freddie told her. "In fact, she's almost like my sister. But never in a million years would she play meat golf with me, or go fencing with me, or help me prank my mom."

Sam smiled. "Yeah, she probably wouldn't."

"Carly's great," Freddie continued. "But you're so much more fun to be around."

Sam looked at the ground, but Freddie saw a small blush creep over her cheeks.

"So," Freddie said, moving over to sit next to Sam on the loveseat. "Want me to tell you what's going on in this soap opera?"

"I thought you had to study," Sam said.  
"Eh, getting a B won't kill me," Freddie shrugged.

"Okay then," Sam said. "I don't know why that lady with the bad perm is trying to kill the lady with the mole. Is it because she wants her money? Or her husband? And who the heck is this creepy housemaid? And why is-"

_You're funnier,_ Freddie thought to himself, watching Sam as she continued to ask him about the soap opera. _You have better hair, you're prettier, you're more creative…you're a better kisser, and you were a better girlfriend._

"So what is it?"

"Huh?" Freddie asked, snapping out of his daze.

"What's this big thing that all the actors keep gasping about?"

"Oh, um, the firefighter ran off with his wife's twin sister," he said quickly.

Sam nodded, and turned back to the T.V.

Freddie looked over at her. He wished that he could tell Sam that in his book, she was always going to be better than Carly.

….

**AN- I'm very sorry, but there is a very good chance that I will not be able to update for about two weeks. I'll try, but I have AP exams these next two weeks at school, and I really need to study.**


	122. Chapter 122

_Breath_

Freddie yawned and looked at his watch. It was two in the morning.

"Sam," Freddie said, looking at his blonde girlfriend, whose head was currently resting on his shoulder. "Sam, we should probably-"

He saw that Sam was fast asleep.

Freddie couldn't help but chuckle. The couple had been watching a four-hour documentary on The Great Depression for the history project Sam was supposed to be doing. After much persuasion, he finally got her to agree to watch the documentary. He had been fairly interested in it, which is why he probably didn't realize that her eyes closed shortly after the documentary began.

Freddie was about to wake Sam, but seeing her so comfortable, so… peaceful just sleeping there on his shoulders…well, it wasn't really something he got to see too often. So, clicking off the T.V., Freddie decided that he'd let Sam sleep. The two were sitting in the Shay's living room (Carly had long since retreated up to her bedroom, and Spencer had been testing out a new brand of bubble bath that turned the bubbles purple since they had gotten home from school), and it wasn't like they each hadn't spent their fair share of nights on this couch; now that they were a couple, why not spend one together?

Freddie grabbed the blanket that was laying on the back of the couch and draped it over him and Sam. He put an arm around her and pulled her in closer. He felt her soft curls on his face and her breath on his neck.

"I love you," Freddie whispered, and then he closed his eyes.

Sam's eyes flickered open. She looked up at her sleeping boyfriend and smiled. "Love you too," she said softly, and then settled back down on his shoulder.

…

**AN- Thanks for being patient while I studied for my AP's; I really appreciate it! Hope you enjoyed this short fluff!**


	123. Chapter 123

_Issue_

"Okay, so was this Machiavelli guy a prince?" Carly frowned, flipping through her history textbook.

"No, he wrote _The Prince_," Freddie said.

"I thought Machiavelli was the guy who painted that famous lady," Gibby said from the kitchen.

"No, that was DaVinci," Carly said. She scribbled down a few notes in her notebook. "Well, I think I'm good for tomorrow's test…maybe I should still review-"

Suddenly, the door to the Shay's apartment swung open and Sam stormed in.

"My life sucks," she said, slamming the door shut. "I need some ham."

"What's wrong?" Carly asked her best friend.

"My stupid cousins wedding is next week," Sam replied, grabbing a small platter of ham slices from the fridge.

"The one with the tattoo of the dog chasing bird on her back?" Freddie asked.

"Yes," Sam mumbled. "And I just found out that if I don't bring a date, I'm stuck eating at the kids table for the reception."

"I always eat at the kids table at weddings," Gibby said. "Much better company."

"Much worse food," Sam snapped. "The kids get some sort of weird vegetarian meal while the adults get lamb!"

"So find a date," Carly said. "You'll definitely find someone in a week. Maybe you can set up a little speed dating thing like you did for me."

"I'll pass," Sam cringed. She turned to Gibby. "Hey. What are you doing next Saturday?"

"Just getting a pedicure," Gibby said.

"Cancel it. You're going to be my date."

"Do I get to wear a tux?" Gibby asked.

"Sure," Sam shrugged. "Whatever you want."

"Sweet!"

"Tell Spencer to buy more of this ham, Carls," Sam said, finishing off the meat. "This is really good."

"Dude, that ham was supposed to be for the entire week," Carly said. "I can't believe you ate all of it."

"I'm tired now," Sam yawned. "I'm going to take a nap upstairs."

"But you have to study for the history test tomor- and she's gone," Carly sighed.

"Yes, it's three o'clock!" Gibby said, looking at his watch.

"What's at three o'clock?" Carly asked as Gibby headed to the door.

"It's almost time for my soap opera," Gibby replied. "I'm finally going to see if Marge remembers that she was engaged to Eric before she got her concussion!"

"Okay," Carly chuckled. She turned back to Freddie. "Do you think we should review that map of Italy?"

"Hmm?" Freddie frowned. He had been staring off into space. "What was that?"

"You okay?" Carly asked. "You never space out like that."

"Um, yeah," Freddie nodded.

"Good. So do you think-"

"Why'd she ask _him_?"

"What?" Carly frowned.

"Why'd Sam ask Gibby to go with her to that wedding as her date?" Freddie asked.

"Because she doesn't want to sit at the kids' table, remember?" Carly said.

"Yeah, I know," Freddie nodded. "But still, why would she ask _Gibby_? I mean, why not…me?"

Carly blinked. "Oh. Um, well, I-I guess maybe she thought it would be awkward, you know, since you two used to date."

"So she asked _Gibby _instead? _Gibby's _going to be less awkward than me?"

"They're friends," Carly pointed out.

"I'm friends with her," Freddie retorted.

"Freddie," Carly said softly. "Are you really having that big of an issue with this?"

"No," Freddie said quickly. "No issue at all. I'm just surprised Gibby didn't object to being forced to wear a tux. I'm sure him and Sam will have a great time."

"Freddie-" Carly started, closing her textbook.

"My mom needs me home," Freddie said, getting up and grabbing his textbook. "I think I heard the whistle; see you at school, Carls."

Carly sighed as he closed the door behind him. _Poor Freddie, _she thought. _Looks like I'm going to have to fix this._

…

"Jeesh, Carly; have you even _worn _this many dresses?" Sam asked, looking through Carly's closet.

"I put five options that would work for a wedding aside to the right," Carly said. "Pick one and then I'll do your hair and makeup."

"You know, _I'm_ not the one getting married here," Sam said, looking through the dresses. "Why do I have to do all of this?"

"Because, you have to look nice at weddings," Carly told her.

Sam gave a loud groan.

"So," Carly said, plugging in her curling iron. "When's Gibby going to get here?"

"In an hour, I think," Sam replied. "I still can't believe my cousin; making me bring that lump of a boy just to get meat."

"Speaking of which," Carly said slowly. "Um, why-why didn't you ask Freddie to go with you? You're friends with him."

Sam turned to look at her. "I dunno."

"I mean, Gibby's great and all," Carly said quickly. "But I always thought you were better friends with Freddie than you were with him."

Sam sighed. "Carly, come on. Do you really think a wedding is the best place to go with your ex-boyfriend?"

"I think it would've been fine," Carly said. "Like I said; you guys _are_ friends."

Sam didn't say anything and turned back around to continue looking at dresses.

"Well, I guess you'll still have fun with Gibby," Carly said. "I just would've thought that you'd rather go with Freddie, but-"

"I did, okay?" Sam said, spinning back around. "The second after I told Gibby he was going to go with me, I wished that I had at least asked Freddie first."

"Oh, Sam," Carly said, putting an arm around her.

"We don't need to have a hug fest, Carly," Sam said. "It's fine. I'll go with Gibby, eat my lamb, and then go home. Gibby gets to wear his tux, I get my meat; it's a win-win."

Carly nodded. "Yeah, I guess…although, you never know. Things might start getting better…"

….

"Sam, don't eat a hot dog wearing a dress!" Carly scolded her best friend from the kitchen.

"This hot dog's not wearing a dress," Sam said.

"Ha, ha," Carly said. "Just don't get mustard on that dress! It's mine, remember."

Freddie sat on the sofa, trying hard not stare at Sam in that stunning gold dress.

"I wonder where Gibby is," Carly said, looking at her pearphone. "If he doesn't get here soon, you're going to be-"

The door to the apartment swung open and in walked Gibby, coughing like crazy and holding a bucket.

"Gib, you alright?" Freddie asked.

"No," Gibby coughed, sitting down on the couch. "I think I'm sick."

"Yeah, no chiz, you look disgusting," Sam said.

"You have a fever," Carly told him, feeling his forehead. "I think you're too sick to go to the wedding."

"What? No, he needs to go," Sam said. "I'm not eating a vegetarian meal!"

"Well," Carly said, looking over at Freddie. "Why don't you go with Freddie then? I mean he's not doing anything tonight."

Sam looked over at him. "Would you want to? The reception shouldn't be too long; these things usually get shut down by the cops after an hour."

"Um, okay," Freddie nodded. "I have a tux across the hall. My mom rented it for out mother-son ballroom dancing class. I guess I'll just go change quickly."

"Great," Carly smiled. "Sam, don't forget your purse; it's sitting upstairs on my bed."

"Right," Sam said, running up the steps.

Once Carly and Gibby were alone in the living room, Carly pulled out a twenty-dollar bill from her pocket. "Nice work, Gib."

"Thank you," Gibby said, taking the cash. "Hey, can I order some pizza? All that coughing really worked up an appetite."

"Sure," Carly nodded. "Thanks again for faking sick. I really owe you one."

"As long as I can still wear my tux tonight, we're good," Gibby said.

"Um, okay," Carly said. "I'm just going to run upstairs to make sure Sam doesn't try to smuggle any meat products into my purse."

She disappeared up the stairs, and a second later, Freddie walked in, wearing his tux.

"Thanks again, Gibby," Freddie said, handing Gibby twenty dollars. "You're the best."

"My mom already told me that," Gibby said.

"Just make sure Carly and Sam don't find out you were faking," Freddie told him.

"Got it."

"Alright, Benson," Sam said, stepping out of the elevator. "Let's get this show on the road. You're driving."

"Fine by me," Freddie chuckled. "See you around, Carly, feel better Gib!"

The two stepped out of the apartment. Sam couldn't help but admit that Freddie looked very good in a tux. _I guess it was worth me paying Gibby to get sick_, she thought to herself.


	124. Chapter 124

_World_

Sam yawned as she pulled back the covers to her and Freddie's bed. It was past midnight and she had only just gotten her newborn twin girls to sleep. She slid underneath the sheets of the bed, and even though she was exhausted beyond belief, she couldn't fall asleep. She glanced over at Freddie's side of the bed, cold and empty.

Freddie had been in Chicago for the past three days, and since he left, Sam had not gotten a full night's sleep.

_Stupid nub's grown on me_, Sam thought to herself. There was a clash of thunder, and Sam heard rain teaming down outside.

"Mommy?"

Sam raised her self up onto her elbows and saw her and Freddie's son, Jason, standing at her doorway.

"Jason, it's after twelve," Sam said.

"The thunder woke me up," Jason replied.

Sam showed a small smile. She knew Jason was terrified of thunderstorms, and that it was taking all his courage to keep from crying.

"Come here," she said, patting Freddie's side of the bed. "Want to sleep here tonight?"

"Um," Jason said. "Well…" He didn't want to look like a baby.

"I'm sort of scared of the thunder, you know," Sam whispered. "Maybe you could keep me company?"

Jason nodded eagerly. "Okay!"

Sam laughed as Jason quickly scrambled under the covers as there was another clash of thunder.

"When's the rain going to stop?" Jason asked in a squeaky voice.

"I think it's supposed to go on all night," Sam said, putting an arm around her son. "Just close your eyes and try not to listen, okay?"

Jason obliged and laid his head on Freddie's pillow.

Sam watched her son's gentle breathing. She couldn't help but smile as she noticed how much he resembled his father. Sure, he got her blonde hair and small stature, but he also had Freddie's big brown eyes, his adorable nose and his chin. Heck, he even wrinkled his nose while he slept just like Freddie did.

Sam sighed. Freddie and their three kids were her whole world; she didn't know what she would do without them. When she was growing up, she'd never thought she would be the type of mother who would just sit and watch her child sleep. When Jason was first born, her and Freddie used to do that a lot; just sit for hours by his crib and smile down at him. They did if for the twins as well, and Sam was sure if any more little Benson's were to come, they would receive the same treatment.

"Mommy?" Jason said suddenly, his eyes still closed. "I miss daddy."

Sam stroked his hair gently. "Me too, Jason. He's going to be home in just two days, though."

"Do you think it's raining in Chicago?"

"Probably not," Sam chuckled.

"That's good. Because daddy's a big chicken with thunderstorms."

Sam laughed. "He sure is. But you know what? I love him anyway."

"Me too," Jason yawned. "Goodnight, mommy."

"Night, sweetie," Sam said, kissing the top of his head.


	125. Chapter 125

**AN- I got a request to write a sequel to the last oneshot where Freddie comes back home after being away for work, so here it is!**

…**..**

_Entrance_

"How much longer?" Jason asked his mom for about the fifteenth time that hour.

"Daddy's plane landed about twenty minutes ago," Sam said, pouring formula into the twins' bottles. "He had to go get his bag, find his car and then drive back home, so he should be about another half-hour."

Jason groaned. "But I'm bored. I want to see him _now_!"

Sam sighed. Jason had been like this all morning. The poor kid really missed his dad.

"You know what you can do?" Sam said. "Why don't you go get all those pictures you drew while daddy was gone and hang them up in the front entrance so he'll see them the second he walks through the door."

"Cool! I have tons!" Jason said excitedly. Sam handed him a roll of tape and he ran off excitedly.

With Jason occupied and the twins taking a nap, Sam finally had a few minutes to herself.

"Time to sit back and watch some car chases," Sam said, flinging herself onto the couch.

After twenty minutes, though, Sam noticed that she hadn't heard a peep from Jason.

"You okay?" Sam asked, getting up and walking over to the front entrance. "Do you need any-Oh…"

"Isn't it good?" Jason asked proudly.

Sam looked around at the entrance. Every square inch of the walls and door were covered with pictures. Jason had even gotten creative and made a few paper chains and hung them from wall to wall, which would hit Freddie in the face the second he walked through the door.

"It's…very nice," Sam said. "But I think your paper chains you made will-"

Suddenly, Sam heard a key turning in the lock of the door and a second later Freddie opened the door.

"Hey, I'm-" but just as Sam predicted, Freddie ran right into the paper chains, and nearly staggered into the coffee table that stood nearby.

"Welcome home!" Jason cried, running over to his father with such force that Freddie, who was already off balance from the paper chain incident, fell to the ground.

"Hey, Jason," Freddie laughed, kissing the top of his son's head. "I'm guessing you're the one who made all of these decorations?"

"It was mommy's idea," Jason said happily.

"Of course it was," Freddie said, looking up at his wife.

"Well maybe if someone wasn't such a klutz and tripped over his own feet," Sam smiled, bending down to kiss him.

"Missed you too, baby," Freddie chuckled.

"Did you bring me anything, dad?" Jason asked his father eagerly.

"Yeah, I did," Freddie nodded. He unzipped one of his bags and pulled out a remote controlled _Galaxy Wars_ cruiser.

"Awesome!" Jason exclaimed, ripping open the package. "Thanks!"

"How many times have I told you no more _Galaxy Wars_ toys for him?" Sam said to her husband as Jason ran off to play with his new toy.

"Well then I guess you won't like the Queen Nia onsies I bought for the girls," Freddie said, tossing Sam to light pink onsies.

"Unbelievable," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Yeah, you won't be saying that when you see your gift," Freddie said, handing Sam an envelope.

Curious, Sam ripped it open. "Holy chiz! This isn't-"

"A pass for an entire years supply of Chicago deep-dish pizzas," Freddie smiled. "You go on that website on the pass and place your order and then you get a fresh Chicago pizza flown out to you. It takes awhile to get here, obviously, but it's guaranteed to be fresh. I think they have an over or something on the plane and they just-"

He was cut off as Sam crashed her lips to his.


	126. Chapter 126

_Legend_

"I love you," Freddie said as his and Sam's lips parted briefly.

"I love you too," Sam said as her lips found Freddie's once more and they deepened their kiss.

These were the moments Freddie loved most; him and Sam were alone in his apartment (his mom was helping his aunt get over the death of her pet hamster) and had been involved in a heavy make-out session for nearly half-an-hour.

"Hey," Sam said, pulling away from Freddie. "Lets do something else."

"Aw, I was having fun," Freddie said playfully.

"Yeah, I know you were," Sam grinned. "But come on, we have your whole apartment to ourselves for once. We can make out any time."

"What did you have in mind?" Freddie asked.

Sam shrugged. "Why don't we, um…oh, I got it!"

"What?"

"Let's camp out!"

Freddie let out a laugh. "Are you serious?"

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well for one thing, it's raining cats and dogs outside," Freddie said. "And second of all, I thought you hated camping; when we went with Spencer that one time you said it was the most miserable night of your life."

"No, I said that because Spencer lost all of our food in the lake and we had nothing to eat all night," Sam told him. "I have nothing against camping. And besides, I wasn't talking about going outside to camp. We can do it right here in your living room."

"And how exactly do we do that?" Freddie asked.

"And you wonder why people don't think you're creative," Sam scoffed. She grabbed the blanket that was draped over the back of threw it over the two armchairs that sat nearby, creating a sort of fort.

"Wow, it really does look like a tent," Freddie said as Sam grabbed his hand and led him into it.

"Of course it does," she said as the couple settled down. She stared at Freddie for a minute.

"Um, do you need anything?" Freddie asked.

"How are we supposed to came without any camp food?" Sam asked, shaking her head at her boyfriend's ignorance.

"Oh, right," Freddie said, getting to his feet. He headed into the kitchen and opened the secret drawer that his mother didn't know about that he kept crammed with junk food for when Sam came over.

"I know we don't have a fire," he said, sitting back down next to Sam and laying out numerous chocolate bars, a bag of marshmallows and a box of graham crackers. "But I figured we could still have s'mores."

Sam eagerly made a grab for the marshmallows. "Your mom lets you keep this stuff in her kitchen?"

"What she doesn't know won't hurt her," Freddie smiled.

Sam laughed and placed her head on Freddie's shoulder as she took a bite of her s'more. "Okay, Benson. Let's hear a scary story."

"A scary story?"

"Yeah, come on, even you have to know at least one," she said.

"Well, there is one I heard at Pear Camp last summer," Freddie said thoughtfully. "It's pretty scary, though. You sure you want to hear it?"

"Baby, you're talking to a girl who slept _under_ her bed when she was little hoping to see the Boogie Man. I think I'll be fine."

"All right, but I warned you," he laughed. "Okay, it's The Legend of Count Lufont."

"Lufont," Sam grinned.

"Just listen," Freddie said, nudging her playfully. "Count Lufont lived in a deserted village in the outskirts of a small country called Handenburg. Handenburg hadn't always been deserted, though; it became deserted after Count Lufont moved there. No body knows what happened to everyone after that. Anyway, one cold night, a traveler named Ivor was traveling through Handenburg to get back home after his brother's wedding. Suddenly, the carriage he was riding broke down. Ivor stepped out to see what had happened. He was examining one of the wheels when he heard footsteps behind him. He turned around, but there was no one there, so he went back to looking at the wheel. Then he felt a cold breath on his neck, but this time, before he could turn around, someone had grabbed him, and he was being dragged towards a dark mansion. He screamed, but he knew there was no one around to hear him. The next day, Ivor's brother went looking for him, because he heard he had never made it home. All he found of Ivor, though, was his carriage, completely destroyed."

Sam frowned. "And?"

"And…what?"

"That was your scary story?" Sam laughed.

"It was chilling!"

"The scariest thing about story was thinking that two parents were cruel enough to name their child Ivor."

"Fine, let's hear one from you," Freddie said, crossing his arms.

"Okay," Sam shrugged. "This one is about a blood sucking banshee who has to have an all out war with a group of crazed flesh eating zombies who are running around trying to eat all of the humans before the banshee even gets a chance to-"

"Or not!" Freddie said quickly.

Sam smiled. "Too scary for you, Fredhead?"

"Maybe," he mumbled.


	127. Chapter 127

_Bench_

"This thing isn't even sharp," Sam frowned, examining Freddie's fencing sword.

"Well, yeah," Freddie said. "Otherwise fencing would be extremely dangerous."

"And wouldn't that be a shame," Sam said, rolling her eyes. She sat down on one of the benches in the gym. "So go on. Teach me how to fence."

"It's a pretty simple concept," Freddie said, tossing Sam some of his smaller armor that he used when he was first starting out. "You basically just have to get the most touches on your opponent. Now of course actually doing that is a lot harder than it sounds. It takes skill and strategy and-"

"Blah, blah, blah," Sam interrupted, pulling her hair back. "Let's just do it." She pulled on her fencing mask.

"Okay," Freddie said, putting on his own mask. "We'll do three touches."

"Fine with me," Sam said. "You'll lose quickly, at least."

Freddie chuckled. "En guard."

"Just say go," Sam told him.

"Fine. Go."

Sam was actually pretty good, considering this was her first time picking up a sword, Freddie saw, but he was still able to block her easily, and in less than thirty seconds he had his first point.

"See, now aren't you glad the swords aren't sharp?" Freddie asked.

"Oh, shut up."

They both began again, and again, Freddie got another touch on Sam.

"Just one more and I win," Freddie grinned though his mask.

"Yeah, like that will happen," Sam said.

But Freddie got yet another point, making him the winner.

Sam took off her mask and went back to the benches.

"Good game," Freddie said, joining her.

"Fencing is stupid," Sam mumbled.

"It's an Olympic sport," Freddie pointed out, amused.

"So is curling, are you going to tell me that's not stupid either?"

"You just don't like it because you lost," Freddie grinned. "And more importantly, I won."

"I let you win," Sam said, crossing her arms. "Thought it would be to embarrassing for you to have your girlfriend beat you in your little sport."

Freddie gave her a look.

"Fine, you won fair and square," she sighed.

"Thank you," he said, satisfied.

"But you know I can still cream your guts in any other form of fighting," Sam said.

"I know you can," Freddie laughed, putting his arm around her. "But you know, you're actually not too bad at fencing."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Of course you're no where near _my _level, but maybe with some lessons, you could improve."

"Are you going to be the one giving me these lessons?" she asked, smiling.

"If you ask me nicely."

Sam shook her head, laughing. "Alright. Would you, my hot, fencing-master of a boyfriend please give me fencing lessons?"

"That was the most sarcastic thing I've ever heard," Freddie said.

Sam put her arms around his neck and gave him a kiss. "Please, for me?"

"Well, when you put it that way…" he smiled. "Absolutely. Come on." He tossed Sam her fencing sword. "First thing you need to work on is holding the sword right."

"Don't you maybe want to take a break before we start?" Sam asked.

"Hmm," Freddie said, catching on as he sat back down next to Sam. "A break wouldn't hurt, I guess." He leaned in and kissed her soft lips. "Wouldn't hurt at all."


	128. Chapter 128

_Brand_

"You know, Samantha," Marissa said, wiping down Sam's counter with a disinfectant wipe. "Your kitchen would look a lot cleaner if it was so cluttered with all this…sugary, processed junk food."

"Yeah, probably," Sam said, not looking up from her magazine.

"And these windows…" Marissa continued, now inspecting the large window above the kitchen sink. "Well, not to toot my own horn, but mine are so spotless you can't even tell if they're open or closed. They're closed, of course, can't have nasty bacteria and germs flying in, but I think you get the idea."

"Uh-huh," Sam nodded, tuning her mother-in-law out. Over the years she found it easier to just let the woman do her random inspections of her and Freddie's house. It did mean Sam didn't have to clean the house herself, and she wasn't one to let free labor go, even if she did have to sit through Marissa's running commentary.

After commenting on the non-symmetric arrangement of the houseplants, Marissa disappeared upstairs to the bedrooms, finally giving Sam some piece and quiet. Unfortunately, the silence was short lived as she returned less than five minutes later and sat down on the couch next to Sam.

"What?" Sam asked, putting down her magazine.

"Nothing, nothing," Marissa said.

Sam saw she had something balled up in her hand. "Okay," she shrugged, picking up her magazine again.

"It's just," Marissa began, and Sam groaned and closed her magazine.

"Go on," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Tell me how unsanitary the bathroom is, or how un-alphabetized the hall closet is or whatever."

"Now while that's all very true, Samantha," Marissa nodded. "That's not my concern right now. Right now, I'm more worried about this."

She opened her hand to reveal and pair of Freddie's boxer shorts.

"Um, why are you going through your son's underwear drawer?" Sam asked.

"I needed to see if they were organized by color!"

"Alright, alright, I'll tell Freddie to start doing that," Sam said, shaking her head.

"It's not that," Marissa said. "It's just that it seems you're not buying my Freddiebear the correct brand of underpants."

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me?"

"This is the cheap, non-certified brand," Marissa explained.

"Who certifies underwear?"

"There's a special branch of the American Hygiene Department! This brand has probably given my poor baby a terrible rash all over his-"

"Okay!" Sam said loudly, cutting her off. "First of all, I can assure you that Freddie is completely rash free-"

"I doubt it," she muttered.

"And second of all," Sam said, ignoring her comment. "_I _don't buy Freddie's underwear. He does it himself. Talk to him when he gets home about it, if you must."

Marissa's eyes grew wide in shock. "You make your husband by his own underpants?"

"Yeah," Sam said. "Believe it or not, most adult men do."

"They most certainly do not!" Marissa sputtered indignantly. "And I'll have you know I bought Freddie every single pair of his underpants until the day he moved out and started living with…you!"

"Then buy them for him now, I don't care," Sam told her, hardly believing the conversation she was having.

"That's not the way it goes, Samantha," Marissa said firmly. "As much as I try to deny it, you are my Freddikins…wife, and as his wife it is your job to make sure he wears the proper brand of undergarments! These are the responsibilities I trusted to you when I gave you two my blessing."

"You never gave us your blessing," Sam pointed out. "On our wedding day you ran up to the alter refused to let Freddie go for half-an-hour!"

"I'll take you to the store," she said, ignoring Sam's last comment. "And show you the exact brand that you'll need to buy. I can't believe Freddie hasn't said anything to me about this catastrophe. He's such a sweet boy; he probably didn't want to worry his mother."

"You can't be serious," Sam muttered.

"Come on," Marissa said, grabbing Sam's wrist and pulling her to her feet. "We'd better get going. It's an hour drive to the special store that sells the brand we'll need."

…

Four hours later, Freddie sat on his couch, eating a bowl of chips and watching the latest episode of _How I met your Sister_. He heard the front door open and his wife walked in carrying a plastic shopping bag.

"You've been out with Carly?" Freddie asked.

"No," Sam snapped. "I just spent the last four hours with your mother!"

"Why?"

"Because I felt like it," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "She forced me to, you nub! Here." She threw the bag at Freddie and it hit him hard in the chest.

"Underwear?" he frowned, opening the bag. "Um, thanks? I didn't really need any, though. I bought some just last week."

"Yeah, but apparently if gives you rashes," Sam said, collapsing into the seat next to him.

"No it doesn't," Freddie said, confused.

"Try telling that to your psycho mother," Sam said darkly.


	129. Chapter 129

_Sensitivity_

"I think there's some leftover pizza in the fridge," Carly told Sam as the girls entered the Shay's apartment.

"Please tell me you didn't order it with pineapple on it again," Sam frowned.

"No," Carly replied. "I got the veggie lovers toppings."

"You're disgusting," Sam said, shaking her head.

"So how about that new girl in out Chemistry class?" Carly said, taking a bottle of Wahoo Punch out of the fridge.

"Who, Melinda?" Sam asked. "That girl smells like cat pee and socks."

"Okay, gross," Carly said, sitting down on the couch next to Sam. "She seems really smart though."

"Uh-huh."

"Freddie should be happy with that," Carly continued. "She is his lab partner, after all, and you know how much he hated his last one who nearly blew off his eyebrows because he mixed the wrong chemicals together."

"I guess."

"I think Melinda was pretty happy when she saw she was his lab partner too," Carly said. "I mean, did you see her face light up when Mr. Jones told her where she was sitting? I may be wrong, but I think somebody has a little crush on our Freddie."

Sam didn't respond, but Carly didn't seem to notice.

"Plus she was scooting her chair real close to his, but I don't think Freddie liked that too much, must've been the smell you were talking about. But still, I think she's kind of cute, you know, in that nerdy sort of way. Hey, you know what? We should totally try too hook the two of them up!"

"What?" Sam frowned.

"Yeah, it will be fun!" Carly nodded eagerly. "We could get them alone in the chem. lab after school or something and the two of them will maybe start talking and then who knows what! I'll lend her some of my perfume, though, first. What do you think? Are you in? Oh, this will be so much fun!"

"I'll pass," Sam said, playing with a lose end of her shirt, not looking at Carly.

"What? Why?" Carly asked. "You know how much I love matchmaking! Come on, it will be so much-Oh." Carly's brain finally clicked. "Oh my gosh, Sam, I'm sorry. I'm so stupid. I completely blanked out. Of course you wouldn't want to set your ex-boyfriend up on a date."

"Just forget about it," Sam mumbled.

"You know, they'd be a horrible couple, now that I think about it," Carly said. "You and Freddie looked _way _better together."

"Seriously, just change the subject, Carly," Sam said.

Carly sighed. She silently cursed herself for being so tactless. Why had she gone and blabbered on about setting Freddie up with some geeky smelly girl right in front of her? She knew Sam wasn't too emotional over most things, heck she was the only girl who Carly knew who didn't shed a single tear during _The Pencil Case_, but Carly knew she had one sensitivity; Freddie. Carly was actually still very confused over the whole Sam and Freddie thing. She didn't even really know why they broke up; Sam said something about an elevator and Freddie had just muttered something about conflicting interests and that was all she had been able to gather from her two friends. Still, Carly noticed that since they had broken up Freddie would unconsciously cross his arms to show his large muscles whenever Sam would talk to a guy and Sam would always give any girl that approached Freddie a dirty look the second Freddie turned his back.

"Isn't there supposed to be a _Girly Cow_ marathon on?" Sam asked, picking up the remote. "I hope they show the episode where Girly gets tossed off the cliff and ends up in the Artic Ocean."

"Um, I think it's on channel nine," Carly said. "Sam, you sure you're okay?"

"Awesome, they're showing the movie!" Sam exclaimed almost too happily. "_Girly Cow goes to Pluto_! I can't believe that Pluto's not a planet anymore. I mean, who are we to just decide that it can't be a planet anymore?"

Carly pulled a smile onto her face but she felt a tiny piece of her heart break for her best friend who was trying to obviously to not show that she was still head-over-heels for Freddie.


	130. Chapter 130

_Substitute_

"Hey, Freddie?" Carly asked, walking into her friend's apartment. "Did you do number 56 of the math homework? I get that your supposed to do something with the X, but do you-oh, yum, garlic rolls." She reached for one of the rolls, but before she could pick one up, Freddie let out a yell. "No!" He ran and grabbed the roll from Carly and set it back on the plate, which was placed on his carefully decorated table.

"Well," Carly huffed indignantly.

"Sorry," Freddie said. "It's just I made those especially for Sam, and you know how many of those she can eat."

"Oh, that's right, it's your one-year anniversary today," Carly said. "That's so exciting!"

"I know," Freddie nodded. "I've been up since seven o'clock this morning making sure everything is perfect. I hacked into the hospital's computer system to make sure my mom's shift won't end until well after midnight, tracked down that DVD with the karate monkey that Sam loves and have been working on this dinner for hours."

"Wow," Carly smiled. "That's so sweet."

"You think Sam will like it?" Freddie asked, pulling a large ham out of the oven.

"She'll love it," Carly said. "What time's she coming over?"

"Six," Freddie replied. "Which is in…twenty minutes. Okay, I just need to make the lemonade and everything will be all set."

He began rummaging through his cabinets. "Uh-oh…no! No! This cannot be happening!"

"What?" Carly frowned.

"I don't have any sugar!" Freddie exclaimed. "All I have is that disgusting sugar substitute that my mom buys! You can't make lemonade with a sugar substitute! It will taste disgusting!"

"Freddie, calm down, you can-"

"Oh my God, the dinner's ruined! Sam and mine's anniversary dinner is-"

"Freddie!" Carly said loudly. "Snap out of it! Look, Spencer just bought a whole bag of sugar yesterday. You can use some of that."

"I can? Thank you, Carly, you're a lifesaver."

"Yeah, I am, aren't I?" Carly laughed. "I've never seen anybody have a meltdown over a sugar substitute before."

"I just want to make sure Sam has the best time tonight," Freddie said as Carly let him into her apartment across the hall.

"Freddie, she will," Carly told him, putting some sugar into a cup for him. "You just need to relax. Sam loves you, and you love her. She knows that even if your lemonade has sugar substitute in it."

"You think so?"

"Definitely. When we were at Build-A-Bra yesterday she literally kept going on about you for the whole time; and hardly any of it was insulting!"

Freddie smiled. "Thanks, Carls." He turned to head back to his apartment.

"You know," Carly called after him. "_I _use sugar substitute in my special lemonade all the time."

"Er, yeah, I'm sure you do," Freddie nodded. "Later!"

He closed the door behind him.


	131. Chapter 131

_Disappearing_

"No, Tyler, see one half is really the same as two fourths," Freddie tried to explain to his youngest son.

"But then why do they have different numbers?" the ten-year old asked.

"Because the numerator and the denominator just show us how pieces from the whole there are," Freddie replied.

"The numnator and domnoator?"

"The top and the bottom numbers."

"But they're different."

Freddie sighed. He had just gotten home from work and usually by this time Tyler had already finished his homework with Sam. Sam, however, had told him to wait until his father got home since she claimed she still had unresolved issues with fractions.

"Okay, let's just try the next one," Freddie said. "In this problem, they want you to-Oh. My. God."

His and Sam's fourteen-year old daughter, Ashton, just came downstairs. She was wearing a very short skirt and what looked like a pound of make-up.

"No, no, no," Freddie said. "What are you doing wearing all of that?"

"I'm going out," Ashton said.

"Out? Where out?"

"On a date."

"A date?" Freddie repeated. "You-No! You're not- Sam!"

"What?" Sam asked, coming downstairs.

"Why does our daughter think she's going on a date?" Freddie asked.

"I told mom," Ashton said.

"Oh yeah, that's tonight," Sam nodded.

"You knew and you didn't tell me?" Freddie exclaimed.

"Calm down, I told you," Sam said.

"When? When did you mention that she was going on a-a-_date_?"

"Last night," Sam said. "I told you that Ashton was going out."

"'Out' does not mean 'date'," Freddie said. "She's fourteen! That's way too young! And look what she's wearing!"

Sam turned to Ashton. "Ash, go scrape off some of that make-up. And find a different skirt."

"One that comes down to your knees!" Freddie called after her as she stomped back upstairs. He turned back to Tyler. "Ty, why don't you take a break? Go watch T.V. or something."

"Sweet!" Tyler said happily, jumping out of his seat and running into the living room.

"Why are you being all crazy?" Sam asked once her son was out of the room.

"Because I don't want my daughter running off with some _boy_ when she's fourteen!" Freddie said.

"It's not even a real date," Sam told him. "It's like five other kids and her going out to the movies."

"Are there boys there?"

"Yes."

"Will one be particularly drawn to each of the girls there?"

"Probably."

"Then it's a date."

"Freddie," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "She's fourteen years old; she's not a baby anymore."

"Fourteen is still too young to date," Freddie said firmly. "When you were fourteen you hadn't even kissed a boy!"

"Mom didn't kiss a boy until she was fourteen?" Emma, Ashton's twin sister, asked. She had been at the fridge getting a soda and Sam and Freddie hadn't noticed that she came into the room. "Everybody's kissed somebody by the time they're fourteen!"

"Not everybody," Freddie said. "There's-wait, who have _you_ been kissing?"

"I'm gonna go take a nap," Emma said, quickly running out of the kitchen.

"What is going on with those girls?" Freddie cried.

"I didn't know about that," Sam said. "But Freddie, you need to chill out."

"How can I chill out, Sam?" Freddie asked. "Our daughters are out kissing boys and going on dates! It's like-like-"

"Like what?"

"It's like my little girls are disappearing," Freddie finished softly.

"Aw, baby," Sam said, putting her arm around her husband. "They're still your little girls. You remember last week when Ashton screamed for you to kill that spider for her? I mean, sure, you had to run and get me to do it because you're a huge whimp, but it still counts. And Emma's the only one who will watch those Nature Channel things with you."

"I know," Freddie frowned. "But I just wish they wouldn't grow up, you know?"

"I know," Sam smiled at him.

There was a knock at the door.

"I think that's Neil," Ashton said, running back downstairs now wearing a pair of jeans and much less make-up."

"Neil," Freddie muttered under his breath as he headed to the front door.

"Wait, you're not going to talk to him, are you?" Ashton asked.

"Just let him have this," Sam whispered to her.

Freddie opened the door, expecting to come face-to-face with an overgrown, brainless buffoon. Instead, he actually had to look down to see a skinny pale boy wearing large glasses and was barely five feet tall.

"Hi, is Ashton here?" the boy asked politely.

"Uh, um, yeah," Freddie nodded, slightly taken back by the boy's appearance. "I-I'm her father."

"Pleased to meet you, Mr. Benson," Neil said, holding a hand out to Freddie.

Freddie shook his hand.

"Wow!" Neil exclaimed, looking at Freddie's wristwatch. "Is that one of those limited edition vintage _Galaxy Wars_ watches?"

"Er, yeah, yeah it is," Freddie said.

"That's awesome," Neil commented. "I was about to place a bid on one of those things, but then I decided to spend my money on this." He pulled out a gold coin.

"Whoa," Freddie said, his eyes widening. "Is that-"

"An actual piece of Sky Naught currency used in the movie," Neil nodded. "You can look at it, if you'd like."

"I've never seen one of these up close," Freddie said, holding the coin gently. "It's-it's beautiful."

"Oh good, I see you met my dad," Ashton said, ducking past Freddie to get out the door.

Sam walked over next to Freddie and caught a look at Neil too.

"You must be Ashton's mother," Neil said, shaking her hand. "How are you?"

"Um, good," Sam said.

"Well, the movie starts at seven," Neil said to Ashton. "We should probably get going. My mom has the car running. We should be home by nine thirty, Mr. Benson, is that okay?"

"Yeah, that's fine," Freddie nodded. "Have fun, you two."

"Bye, mom, bye, daddy," Ashton called to her parents.

"Oh my God," Sam said after Freddie closed the door. "My daughter's dating a total geek! It's true, girls really do try and date their fathers."

"I like that kid," Freddie said. "I think he'll be very good for Ashton."

"You just like him because he's as big a doof as you are," Sam said.

"He's a gentlemen and has excellent movie taste," Freddie said. "Okay, now you need to upstairs and talk to Emma."

"Why?"

"Find out about this boy she's been kissing! For his sake he better be Neil's twin brother!" 


	132. Chapter 132

**AN-I got a request to do a follow up to last chapter where Sam talks to Emma about her first kiss. Hope you enjoy!**

…

_Festival_

"Emma," Sam said, knocking at the door of the room the twins shared with each other.

"Yeah?"

Sam opened the door. Emma was sitting on her bed watching an MMA fight. Sam smiled; of all her kids, Emma was the most like her.

"Your dad's having a panic attack downstairs," Sam said, sitting down at the desk chair.

"He has panic attacks every other day," Emma pointed out.

"Okay, true," Sam nodded. "But this one wasn't caused by me."

"Then why's he freaking out?"

"Because he assumed that you and Ashton were both still innocent little girls and had never kissed anybody," Sam said.

"Oh," Emma said, looking down at her lap.

"Yeah," Sam said. "He sent me up here to find out the name of this boy you've apparently been kissing."

"It was only once," Emma muttered. "It's not like I go and swap spit with him everyday. I don't know why dad's freaking out."

"He just doesn't want his girls to grow up too quickly and leave him," Sam told her.

"He still doesn't need to overreact," Emma said. "It's just a kiss."

"Em," Sam sighed. "You know he's just like that because he loves you. Look, my dad didn't even stick around to see any of the guys I dated. And if he did, I doubt he would've cared what they were like, so long as they got me out of his hair for a little bit. Heck, even now he doesn't care enough about me to see what my husband's like; I doubt he even _knows_ that I'm married."

"I guess it's kind of nice that he cares so much," Emma mumbled.

"He loved Ashton's date," Sam told her. "So he's not _too _crazy about the whole thing."

"Of course he loved that nerd," Emma grinned. "I don't know what Ashton sees in him. I've been putting gum on the guy's gym shorts for years."

"Original," Sam nodded approvingly. "Okay, kid. Now talk."

"What do you mean?" Emma frowned.

"I came up here to find out who this boy is that you had your first kiss with it," Sam said. "Don't think I forgot."

"You-you don't know him," Emma said quickly.

"Honestly, you'd think you'd know how to lie better," Sam said. "Come on, who is he?"

"Ugh, you promise you won't tell anybody?" Emma said.

"Who am I going to tell that would even care?" Sam asked, raising her eyebrow.

"Yeah, good point," Emma shrugged. "Okay…it was Quincy."

"Gibson?" Sam exclaimed, her eyes widening. "Quincy Gibson, son of Gibby Gibson, was your first kiss?"

"Ashton already made fun of me enough," Emma snapped. "Though seeing who _she's_ going out with I don't think she has any room to criticize me."

"I'm-I'm not making fun of you," Sam said, trying to keep a straight face. "It was just so…unexpected."

"It was at that stupid Renaissance Festival we went to with school last year," Emma sighed. "I bet him that he couldn't eat more turkey legs than me, so we got a bunch and then sat down at an empty picnic table to eat. I won, obviously, and then we were just kind of sitting there and… we kissed."

"But you ate more turkey legs than him?" Sam asked.

"Oh yeah. By like five," Emma nodded.

"Okay," Sam said. "I guess that's the most important thing…and you guys never did it again?"

"We swore we'd never talk about it," Emma said. "I mean, I told Ashton, because I have enough blackmail over her to make sure she doesn't talk, but that's it."

"Well, alrighty then," Sam said, standing up. She looked at the T.V. "Is this fight a re-run?"

"Yeah, but it's one of my favorites," Emma said. "It's the one where Garry Micheals gets knocked out by that dude with the glass eye."

"I remember now," Sam said. She turned to leave the room.

"Hey, mom?"

"Yeah?"

"Was it true what dad said downstairs?" Emma asked. "Did you really never kiss a guy until you were fourteen."

"Yup," Sam nodded.

"Oh…"

"But your dad didn't have his first kiss until he was fourteen either," Sam said.

"Really?"

"Uh-huh."

"At least yours probably wasn't with a total nub, like mine was," Emma said.

"Oh believe me, he was a nub," Sam said. "Still is."

"You mean you still know the guy?" Emma asked.

"Well I married him," Sam shrugged. "So yeah, I guess."

"Dad was your first kiss?"

"We both just wanted to get it over with," Sam grinned. "Have fun with your fight, Em."

She closed her daughter's door and headed back downstairs.

"So?" Freddie said the second he saw her. "Who is the kid? Did you find out?"

"Yeah, I found out," Sam said. "But Emma made me promise not to tell you."

"Sam! You're killing me! Can you at least tell me if he's a kid I need to worry about?"

"Trust me, the kid isn't much higher up on the coolness pole than Ashton's date," Sam assured him. "You lucked out; looks like our girls go for nerds."

"Let's hope it stays that way," Freddie said. "You're really not going to give me a hint?"

"Maybe you'll find out someday," Sam smiled, grabbing the remote from his hand. "Seriously, baby. Chill out."

"I need to get out of here," Freddie said. "I think I'll head over to Gib's. Watch some Sci-Fi with him. You know, that guys lucky he has all boys. He doesn't have to deal with any of this with Quincy, Huey and Kirby."

"Nope, guess not," Sam said. "Have fun with your Sci-Fi chiz."

"I'll be back in a couple of hours," Freddie said, giving her a quick kiss.

After he left, Sam tried to imagine having Gibby's kid as her son-in-law. She shuddered at the thought.


	133. Chapter 133

**AN- I wrote sort of a continuation from last chapter in the sense that it's another future fic that happened around the same time as the last chapter. It was written as a request, so I hope everyone enjoys it! Oh, and if you read istart my life, then some of the characters will be familiar! If not, don't worry; it's just a minor thing and it doesn't take away from the plot. **

…

_Flooding_

"Mom, come on, it's just a loan," Jason pleaded as Sam slid the turkey into the oven. "I'll pay you back."

"I'm not giving you five hundred dollars for some new computer upgrade," Sam said. "How much money do you think we have?"

"Think of it as an investment," Jason said. "When I go back down to Cal Tech. after the break, I'm going to need the fastest, latest computer to keep up with all of my class work. An upgrade will make sure I stay at the top of my class and when I'm rich and rolling in cash, I'll let you mooch off of me."

"First of all, I don't need your permission to mooch off of you when you're rich," Sam said. "I changed your diapers; I automatically get a cut. Second of all, No!"

"Ugh, I asked the wrong parent," Jason moaned, heading out of the kitchen.

"Alright," Sam said, walking out to the living room where Freddie, Carly and her husband, Gibby and his wife, and Spencer and his wife (who happened to be Sam's cousin, Ella) were all sitting. "I did my part of the Thanksgiving. Turkey's in."

"Okay, I guess I should start on my famous apple pie," Carly said, jumping up.

"We _do _have frozen pies for back up, right?" Spencer asked as soon as his sister was out of earshot.

"Oh yeah," Sam nodded. "Don't worry."

"Where'd all the kids get to?" Freddie asked.

"I think they all went down to the basement," Ella replied. "At least it's finally quiet."

"I know," Sam agreed. "While I was getting the turkey ready Jason kept trying to hit me up for money."

"For that new Pear OS 5.6 upgrade?" Freddie asked. "I just gave him my credit card to get it."

"Freddie!" Sam exclaimed, hitting her husband's shoulder. "What happened to that united front chiz you lecture me on?"

"I didn't know you already said no," Freddie defended. "And _you_ bought Tyler a dirt bike for his birthday after I said no!"

"Wow, you guys are louder than the kids were," Spencer said. "Wonder what they're up to anyway."

….

"Shut up! He did not!" Carly's fourteen year-old daughter, Clarissa, exclaimed.

"He did," Ashton nodded. "Neil bought me flowers and gave them to me this morning."

"And then I poured a carton of milk on him from the upstairs window," Emma added proudly.

The three girls were sitting on beanbag chairs that were in the corner of Sam and Freddie's basement which had been built into a sort of hang out for both them and their kids. Jason was sitting on one of the couches, watching T.V. with Spencer's two kids, Dina, who was studying art at the University of Washington and Bryan, who also went to the university, but on a swimming scholarship. Tyler, the youngest Benson child, was tossing a football around with two of Gibby's boys, Huey and Kirby.

"That's better than what she did to me last week," Gibby's other son, Quincy, who was the same age as the girls, said, sitting down with them. "I came by to bring her dad back some DVD that my dad had borrowed and she opened the door and poured a Jell-O cup into my hair!"

"Wow," Clarissa grinned. "You really don't like visitors."

"Just the geeky one," Emma pointed out.

"Watch out!" Tyler yelled over to the four as his football came sailing towards them, nearly hitting Ashton in the head.

"Dad told you not to play catch down here!" Ashton said loudly, picking up the football.

"We're not playing catch," Tyler said. "We're just throwing the ball up in the air and trying to not let it hit the ground."

"That's catch, Tyler," Ashton said. She tossed the ball back to her younger brother.

Tyler put his arms out to catch it, but he missed and the football flew past him towards the small sink that had been in the basement when Sam and Freddie moved in. The ball hit the pipe that was sticking out of the back of the sink, and it must've either been a very hard throw or a very loose pipe, for fell to the floor and water began gushing out of the other pipe that had been connecting it to the wall.

"Nice going!" Emma exclaimed, jumping up.

"It was an accident!" Ashton said.

"What did you guys do?" Jason said, running over, trying not to slip on the puddle of water that was steadily growing bigger.

"Find something to hold the water in!" Quincy shouted as he got sprayed in the face.

Dina grabbed the empty trash bin that was sitting by the T.V. and threw it to Jason, who held it under the pipe.

"What do we do when it fills up?" Tyler asked. "The whole basement is flooding!"

"Can't you fix it?" Emma asked Quincy. "You build all those lame model planes and chiz."

"That's completely different from fixing plumbing!" Quincy snapped.

"Ugh, you're so useless!" Emma groaned.

"Mom and dad are going to kill us," Ashton said.

"Us?" Jason frowned. "You're the one who threw the ball!"

"Because Tyler threw it at me!"

"Can't we use duct tape or something?" Kirby asked. "Or gum?"

"Here," Emma said, taking the gum out of her mouth and slapping it in Quincy's hand. "Use this."

"Gross!" Quincy cringed. "It has your spit all over it."

"Just try it, quickly!" Clarissa said. "I'm staring to get water in my shoes!"

Quincy tried to stick the pipe back with Emma's gum, but it simply refused to hold.

"Isn't there a water shut off valve somewhere down here?" Bryan asked.

"Yeah, by the door!" Jason nodded. "Go use it!"

Bryan waded through the water, which was now ankle deep, and turned the valve off. At once, the water stopped spraying from the pipe.

"Okay, that's one problem solved," Jason said. "Now how are we going to get all this water out of here before our parents find out?"

….

"Dude, there's no way that happened," Freddie laughed.

"It did too!" Gibby argued. "We were at the zoo and the ostrich totally tried to kill me!"

"I miss my ostrich," Spencer sighed.

"Um, guys?" Carly said, walking into the room, still wearing her apron. "I think your sink is broken."

"It worked fine for me," Sam said.

"Well it won't turn on now," Carly said.

"Sam, did you forget to pay the water bill again?" Freddie sighed.

"No!" Sam snapped. She turned back to Carly. "Maybe one of the kids accidentally turned off the water valve in the basement. I'll go check."

"I'll go with you and bring up the fancy plates," Freddie said. "Gib, come help me carry the box up."

"Why don't you ask me?" Spencer frowned.

"Because you have the upper-body strength of an elf," Sam said.

The adults headed downstairs and opened the door that led to the basement. When they stepped in, though, they heard a splash. Sam looked down.

"Why am I wet?" she asked.

"What happened down here?" Freddie asked, looking over at the kids.

"Um, Ashton did it," Tyler said quickly.

"It wasn't my fault!" Ashton said.

"Alright," Gibby grinned. "An indoor pool party!"

"Gibby!" Sam snapped. She turned to the kids. "Alright. Who wants to explain why my basement is flooded?"

"Okay, first of all, I just want to say I had absolutely nothing to do with this," Emma said.

"You got the chewing gum stuck to the pipe now," Jason pointed out.

"That was Quincy."

"You made me do it!" Quincy cried.

"What. Happened?" Sam said again.

"What's taking so long?" Spencer called from upstairs. "You guys need help? I know I have no-Ah!"

Spencer had slipped on a puddle of water on one of the stairs and slipped into Freddie, who fell into Sam, and the three adults fell into the water.

"Nice going," Sam spat, wiping the water out of her eyes.

"Did I hear a splash?" Carly called from upstairs. She came down and her eyes widened at the sight. "What happened?"

"Sam and Freddie built a pool and didn't want us to find out about it," Gibby said.

"Um, see, Tyler threw the ball at Ashton," Jason started. "And she threw it back at him, but Tyler missed and the ball hit the pipe."

"How many times have I told you not to play ball in the house?" Freddie said to Tyler.

"Can we focus on the fact that out basement is flooded?" Sam said.

"It doesn't look like it flooded enough to cause too much damage," Freddie said, standing up and helping his wife up. "It didn't reach any of the plugs, and the TV's safe on its stand."

"We did need to clean the carpet anyway," Sam mumbled.

"So everything worked out then," Tyler smiled.

"Oh, you're still in trouble," Sam assured him.

"Do you guys have a pump?" Spencer asked.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "It flooded down here last winter. I'll go get it from the garage."

"You guys all change before you get sick," Sam said.

The kids all filed out of the basement.

"Sorry, mom," Ashton said as she started up the stairs.

"Yeah, sorry mommy," Tyler said. "I love you."

"I love you too," Sam smiled. "But you're still grounded."

"This would only happen in your house," Carly grinned as Sam rung out her hair.

"I know, right?" Sam nodded.

"Man, maybe I should flood my basement," Gibby said. "This is so cool!"


	134. Chapter 134

_Article_

"Sam, will you stop sleeping and help me?" Freddie snapped. "This project is due tomorrow and it's barely started!"

"Well whose fault is that?" Sam yawned.

"Yours! I've been after you all week to help me with it and you always found some way to get out of it!"

"The idea was for you to do it _without me_," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"That's not going to fly anymore, Sam," Freddie said firmly. "From now on, you've got to start taking more responsibility with your school work. Next year in college, you're not going to be able to-"

"Okay, okay, spare me the lecture," Sam said. "What do you want me to do?"

"Take this poster board and start drawing the battle field of the American Revolution," Freddie instructed. "I outlined exactly what you need to include here."

"This looks lame," Sam said, scanning the outline. "How about this? We make a haunted battlefield! We can have ghosts of dead soldiers chasing around the British guys and-"

"This has to be historically accurate," Freddie cut her off. "You find me an article that says there were ghosts in the American Revolution, then fine, we can do that."

"No need to get your little _Galaxy Wars_ boxers in a knot," Sam said.

The two were quiet for a while. Freddie continued typing up their written report.

"How's the battlefield looking?" he asked. "Sam? Sam!"

"What?" Sam frowned. "I'm doing the stupid battlefield like you asked!"

"You're doing it wrong!" Freddie said, grabbing the pencil from her hand. "The Patriot troops were led through _this _valley, not this one! And the Loyalists were over here! Didn't you read that outline I gave you?"

"Yeah, and it said nothing about valleys so lay off, Fredward," Sam said.

"Well if you would've opened your textbook for once in your life and actually read something intelligent for a change you would've known that," Freddie snapped. "Man, you're lucky you're not working by yourself on this or there's no way you'd get a decent grade."

He turned back to his laptop and continued writing the research paper. After about an hour he finished. "Okay, I'm done with my part," he said, saving the paper. "Are you done with the battlefield?"

Sam nodded.

"Looks good, now that everyone's coming in from the right valley," Freddie said approvingly. "I think we're finally done. You wanna go grab a smoothie to celebrate?"

"Nope," Sam said.

"Really? You never turn down free food. Well, do you want to go and film a few clips for iCarly?"

Sam shook her head. "Nope." She grabbed her jacket and without a word headed out of Freddie's apartment.

Freddie frowned. Something was up. He turned and ran out of his apartment.

"Sam!" He caught her just as she was headed down the stairs. "You're not even gonna go to Carly's?"

"She's out on a date," Sam shrugged.

"Then where are you going?"

"I do have my own house, believe it or not," Sam said.

"Yeah, but you never hang out there," Freddie pointed out. "If Carly's not home you always come by my place and hang out over there, unless my mom's home, but then you drag me somewhere else."

"Yeah, well, I don't think you really want to spend time with me, do you?" Sam said simply.

"Wait, what?" Freddie frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"Oh come on!" Sam said. "Are you really that clueless?"

"Um, apparently?"

"You've been a complete jerk to me lately!" Sam said.

"No I haven't, that's crazy!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Really?" Sam said, crossing her arms. "Let's see, you told Mr. Howard that I was the one who cracked his car window, you bought Carly a smoothie last week but made me pay for mine, and just now you nearly ripped my head off because I made some people come through the wrong valley!"

Freddie blinked. She had a point. He didn't realize he had been acting so, well, for lack of a better word, jerk-like.

"Sam, I-I'm sorry," Freddie started.

"Whatever, just forget about it," Sam shrugged. "We said-we said we'd go back to the way things were after we broke up, so I guess this is it."

She turned to continue down the steps, but then Freddie said, "But I thought you wanted all that!"

"What?" Sam frowned, stopping and turning to him.

"I thought-I thought you wanted someone more…abnormal," Freddie finished sheepishly. Hadn't she seen that; all of the times he had called her a name or picked on her like she used to do to him (and still did, though not as often), he was just trying to be more like her! They had broken up because they were too opposite, so after much thought, he figured what better way to try and win her back then to treat her the same way she treated him! After all, he fell for the girl that tormented him, maybe she would fall for him the same way.

"You-you were trying to be more…abnormal?" Sam repeated. "But why?"

"Because that's why we broke up," Freddie reminded her. "I thought…maybe if I started acting more like, well, you, you'd feel more, you know, compatible with me, and then maybe we could…"

He couldn't finish that last bit. He looked at her, with her long, blonde hair and bright blue eyes that got him every time.

"…could get back together?" Sam finished softly.

Freddie nodded. "Yeah."

"You nub," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I was trying to be more normal for you!"

"Wait, you were?"

"Why do you think I haven't been kicking your butt senseless for the way you've been acting?" Sam asked, showing a small smile.

Freddie suddenly realized she was right. Sure, she still was far from acting like most girls, but she had been getting in a lot less trouble lately, and her beatings were much more sparse.

"So-so you wanted to try and get us back together too?" Freddie asked.

Sam shrugged. "We did say we'd try it again; if you became more abnormal and I became more normal."

Freddie nodded. "We did."

The two were silent for a moment.

"So," Sam finally said, looking at her shoes. "Did-did we just get back together?"

"Feels like it," Freddie said, beginning to grin slowly. "But hey, listen, Sam?"

"Yeah?"

"I don't want you to be normal, or, as close to normal as you could get. I-I like that crazy demon, you know."

"And I don't want you to be abnormal either, I guess," Sam said. "I'm going to need someone to post bail for me after all."

"So how about we just go back to how we both were," Freddie said, reaching for her hand. "I'll be the nubby boyfriend and you be the delinquent girlfriend."

"Deal," Sam smiled.

The newly formed couple stared at each other for a moment until Freddie finally mustered up his courage and leaned towards her, pressing is lips gently against hers. At once he felt the fireworks that he had desperately been missing from his life.

"Hey," Sam said when the two broke apart. "Carly's apartment is empty."

"It would totally freak her out if she came home and saw us making out on the couch," Freddie said.

"I know!" Sam nodded. "Come on, let's go."

She pulled Freddie back up the stairs.

Freddie laughed. He really had missed this.

…..

**AN- Well, that's MY explanation for why Freddie's been such a jerk to Sam on the show lately, especially in ipear store. Hope you enjoyed!**


	135. Chapter 135

**AN- Another sequel! This one is a continuation of the last chapter where Carly walks in on the newly-formed couple. Hope you like it!**

…

_How_

Carly grunted as she heaved a large box down the eighth floor hallway of Bushwell Plaza. She had just gotten back from her date (which considering the boy had shown up half an hour late with a large mustard stain on his shirt and insisted on calling her Carly-Barly the whole date, hadn't gone well), and was greeted with a large box of sculpture materials that Spencer must've ordered in the lobby. Of course the elevator had picked today to be out of service and Lewbert had insisted that the box be removed from his lobby at once, so poor Carly had no choice but to drag it up eight flights of stairs.

When she finally reached her apartment door she sighed in relief and got her key out of her pocket. She then saw that the door was already open.

_Well, that means either a dangerous criminal is waiting in there to murder me_, Carly thought. _Or Sam or Freddie is camped out in there. _

Deciding that the second option was far more probable, Carly opened up her apartment door. The lights were dimmed, so she could barely see.

"Hey, I'm home, whoever's here!" she said. "Come help me bring in this box of-Ah!"

Carly had just flipped the lights on and saw Sam and Freddie cuddled together, making out.

"Oh, hey," Sam nodded to her.

"You-but-wha-?"

"What's in the box?" Freddie asked, his arms still wrapped around Sam.

Carly just continued to stare at her two friends, completely flabbergasted. "I-I-what's going on here?"

"I was kissing Freddie," Sam replied in a casual tone. "And he was kissing me back."

"Yup, pretty much," Freddie nodded.

"Well yeah, I got that!" Carly exclaimed. "But-but you two were broken up!"

"We got back together," Sam shrugged.

"When?"

"About twenty minutes ago," Freddie said, looking at his watch.

Carly's eyes widened. "Twenty minutes?" She grabbed Sam's wrist and dragged her over to the kitchen.

"What'd you do that for?" Sam asked.

"How?"

"How what?"

"How what? How did you and Freddie happen? Again!"

"Oh you know, we were just talking and one thing led to another," Sam said simply.

"One thing led to another?" Carly repeated. "_That's_ the explanation I'm getting here?" She turned to Freddie. "Is that your story too, pal?"

"Um, yeah?" Freddie nodded.

"Unbelievable!" Carly exclaimed. "You two are impossible!"

"Why are we impossible?" Carly asked.

"Do you have any idea how long I have been waiting for this?" Carly said. "A long time!"

"That's just a little creepy," Sam pointed out.

"I wanted details!" Carly continued, ignoring Sam. "I mean come on, this is as close to a relationship as I've had in months!"

"I'm guessing your date didn't go too well then?" Freddie said, getting up and joining the girls in the kitchen.

"No, it was terrible, the guy-Hey, wait a minute!" she said. "Don't change the subject, this isn't about me!"

She sighed and crossed her arms. "You remember we were all tied up after those escaped prisoners came out of Spencer's giant pants? We promised we wouldn't keep things from each other. I mean you guys already kept the fact that you kissed at the lock-in last year."

Sam and Freddie looked at each other.

"Alright," Freddie said. "Why don't we all go out to dinner and I promise, me and Sam will tell you everything."

"E-Everything?" Carly asked.

"Everything," Sam nodded.

"You guys won't be upset that I'll be intruding on your first date as a couple again?"

"Nah," Sam assured her. "Freddie will take me out tomorrow for that, won't you baby?"

"You know it," Freddie grinned, putting his arm around her shoulder. "So lets go. Tomato Garden good with everyone?"

"Oh, they have the best breadsticks!" Carly said excitedly.

"I know, right?" Sam agreed. "Hurry up. Now my mouth's watering…"


	136. Chapter 136

**AN- Okay, this is a continuation of last chapter that I'm doing because I got a request. It's about Sam and Freddie's first date as a couple again. Hope you like it!**

…

_Thickness_

Freddie nervously straightened his tie in the mirror. Tonight was the night. His and Sam's first official date as a re-coupled couple. Sure, they had gone out yesterday with Carly, but that didn't count. Tonight it was going to be just the two of theme.

Freddie had thought since him and Sam had already been on a few dates, he wouldn't feel so nervous preparing for this one, but as he ran a comb through his hair, he found himself with the same sweaty palms and shaky breathing that he had experienced getting ready for his and Sam's first date months ago.

"Bye, mom!" Freddie called, quickly heading to the door. "I'm going to my model train club meeting!"

He didn't plan on telling his mom that him and Sam were back together for quite some time. He just hoped Gibby wouldn't go and spill the beans this time.

Freddie walked across the hall to Carly's apartment where he was going to pick up Sam.

"Hey, Freddie," Carly greeted him when he walked in. "Sam's almost ready. She was just finishing getting dressed when I came down here."

Freddie nodded and sat down quietly on the couch.

"Whoa, why are we all dressed up?" Spencer asked, coming out from his bedroom.

"He has a date with Sam," Carly told her brother.

"What? When did this happen?"

"I'll tell you later," Carly told him.

"Fine," Spencer said. Then he turned to Freddie. "But there better be none of the same chiz that happened last time. Don't you dare put Sam through that again."

"It was a mutual break-up," Freddie pointed out.

"I know," Spencer said. "But you know Sam's like another sister to me. I just don't want to see her upset like that again."

"She was really upset?" Freddie asked.

Spencer nodded.

"Alright, let's get going, Benson," Sam said, coming down the stairs wearing a light blue strapless dress and a pair of silver heels.

"Can't I take some pictures first?" Carly asked.

"No, you're just going to put them on iCarly," Sam said.

"…No."

"Our reservations are in twenty minutes," Freddie said, staring at Sam, trying not to drool over how good she looked.

"Have her back by eleven!" Spencer called after the two.

"So, where are we going?" Sam asked as her and Freddie headed down to the lobby and out of the building.

"That steakhouse next to Bed Bath and Bewilderment," Freddie replied.

"Dude, you know that place is probably the most expensive restaurant in Seattle," Sam said.

"I know," Freddie nodded. "And I don't care. I knew you would really like it."

Sam smiled.

When they arrived at the restaurant and took their seats in their booth, Freddie took Sam's hand.

"You look really, _really_ nice tonight."

"I'd hope so," Sam said. "Carly and I spent forever finding this dress. She was dead set on making me wear this weird pink thing with a poofy skirt; thank God I talked her out of it."

Freddie tried to imagine Sam wearing something like that and laughed. "I'm sure you would've still looked amazing in it."

"Probably," Sam shrugged, picking up her menu.

"Hey, what does choice cut mean?" Freddie asked, also picking up a menu.

"It's something to do with the thickness of the steak," Sam answered.

"You're the expert," Freddie said.

The two put in their orders and while they waited they talked and joked like they hadn't in so long. Sam couldn't believe she had survived without Freddie in her life like this for as long as she did. She didn't tell him that, of course. She saved that romantic, sappy stuff for him.

"So," Freddie said, taking a sip of his iced tea. "When did you realize that you wanted us to get back together?"

"About five minutes after we broke up," Sam replied truthfully.

"Spencer said you were really upset," Freddie said, grinning cockily.

"Yeah, well," Sam shrugged, trying to sound nonchalant. "I had to go back to buying my own food." She made a mental note to kill Spencer when she got back to Carly's. "So what about you? When did you realize you wanted to come back to mama?"

"Four minutes after we broke up," Freddie said. "So I guess I win."

When the couple's steaks arrived they both dug in right away.

"Oh my God," Freddie said after he took his first bite. "This is _so_ good! This cow must've been raised in one of those special farms."

"Seriously," Sam nodded. "I've had a lot of steak, but this is the best."

She reached across the table for the bottle of steak sauce that the waiter had left for them and poured a large glob onto her plate.

"Um, isn't that a lot of sauce?" Freddie asked.

Sam glared at him.

"Don't worry, I'm kidding," he said, chuckling. "You really don't think I'd be stupid enough to make that mistake twice."

"Smart boy," Sam said approvingly.

Freddie watched as Sam ate and noticed she had gotten some steak sauce on her upper lip.

"You've got something," Freddie told her. "Right-hold on, I'll get it."

He leaned across the table and kissed her, tasting her strawberry lip-gloss and the Salisbury steak sauce.

"You should be glad I used so much steak sauce now," Sam grinned when they broke apart. "Gave you a chance to use that incredibly cheesy move."


	137. Chapter 137

**AN: I got a request to do a oneshot with Sam and Freddie planning their wedding, so here it is!**

…**..**

_Fail_

Sam yawned as she walked up the stairs of Bushwell Plaza to the eighth floor. Unlike most of the times she took this path, though, she did not head into apartment 8C, but instead knocked on the door across from it.

"Oh, it's you," Marissa Benson said, opening the door.

"Yup, it's me," Sam said, trying to keep her voice pleasant.

"Mom, be nice, will you?" Freddie said, walking over next to her and letting Sam into the apartment.

"I am being nice," Marissa said. "Just because this germ-ridden, mannerless delinquent is going to take my precious son away from me-"

"Well, you're going to be late," Freddie said quickly. "See you tonight, mom."

"She hates me even more now, doesn't she?" Sam asked, giving her fiancé a kiss.

"She'll get over it," Freddie shrugged. "She's just upset that I'll be moving out soon."

"You're twenty-six," Sam pointed out. "She should've known it was coming eventually. So, are we going to start planning now? You made me get here at nine in the morning, so let's get moving so we can finish and go get something to eat."

"I have food in the kitchen," Freddie said as they sat down on the couch.

"Yeah, gross organic _healthy_ food," Sam said. "You know mama doesn't eat that garbage."

"I promise, as soon as we finish up some of the wedding plans we'll go get some real breakfast," Freddie grinned.

"Good," she said happily.

"Carly dropped by some wedding catalogs," Freddie said, nodding over to the stack of magazines on the coffee table. "She says if you just go by all of the tabs she placed in them you can't fail."

"Ugh, I already told Carly we could do this on our own," Sam groaned.

"She's just trying to help," Freddie told her.

"I know, I know," Sam said. "Alright, if we end up completely failing with this wedding planning stuff, we'll go to her catalogs."

"Sounds good," Freddie nodded. "Um, so, do you know where we start?"

"Hmm, well," Sam said. "Uh, no."

"You've seen movies with weddings," Freddie said. "Just think of those."

"Usually I'm asleep during them," Sam replied. "You know Carly guilts me into seeing them with her."

"Come on, you've got to remember something."

Sam sighed. "Um, oh! Flowers! There's always a ton of flowers at the wedding!"

"We can work with that," Freddie said, grabbing his laptop. "Okay, here are some flower shops in Seattle…and here's one that specializes in weddings."

"Whoa, it costs that much to get some flowers?" Sam exclaimed, looking at the prices on the website. "That's a rip-off!"

"It's not that bad," Freddie reasoned. "Besides, you always yell at me for being cheap."

"Yeah, when it comes to food and that stuff," Sam said. "But flowers? We could go pick our own and save all that money."

"You can't just go tearing up flowers from all over the city, babe," Freddie said. "Come on, just look at these. What kinds do you like?"

"I guess those white roses aren't bad," Sam shrugged. "And the purple violets."

"They're fine by me," Freddie said. "Alright, should I put our order in?"

"You're really not going to let me grab them from people's gardens?"

"Sam…"

"Fine, fine, do it," Sam said.

Freddie typed in a few things on the website and then finished the order. "What's next."

"Let's see, we finished the invitations last week," Sam said. "You got your tux?"

"It'll be ready for me to pick up two weeks before the wedding."

"So will my dress," Sam nodded. "What about music?"

"Actually," Freddie said. "I had a band in mind."

"Really? Which band?"

"They're called the Galaxy Defenders," Freddie said. "And they can re-create all of the music from _Galaxy Wars_!"

Sam stared at him. "You're joking?"

"No! How awesome would it be to have our first dance as husband and wife to the theme from the Battle of Panthatar?"

"That-That's a trick question, right?"

"These guys are affordable, nearby and professional," Freddie said. "Plus if we book them now, they'll even get some back up dancers to dress up like skynauts for no extra charge!"

"Baby, you know I love you," Sam said. "And maybe on some level I find your extreme geekiness to be sort of cute."

Freddie grinned. "Aw, I knew you liked it."

"But in what universe did you actually think I was going to agree to this?" Sam frowned.

"Wait, so that's a no?"

"Yes that's a no!"

"Well then what are we going to do for a band?" Freddie asked.

"Do you remember that kid named Harper that was on that show with us back when we were thirteen?"

"Um, yeah, I think," he nodded.

"Well he has his own band now," Sam said. "You can hear him on his website and they're pretty good."

"So you want them to play?"

"More than I want Galaxy Savers to play."

"It's Galaxy Defenders, actually," Freddie corrected, which earned him a glare from Sam.

"Okay, okay, I'll listen to Harper's band," Freddie said.

"You'll like them," Sam promised. "Is there really anything else we need to do?"

"No, we got the church booked and the reception's going to be at the clubhouse next to it, the-"

"The food!" Sam exclaimed. "Oh my God, Freddie, we forgot about the food!"

"Calm down, calm down," Freddie said.

"How can I calm down when we forgot the food!" Sam cried. "That's the most important part of the wedding!"

"We'll find a catering place, don't worry," Freddie said.

"I almost forgot the food, Freddie," Sam whispered. "What's happening to me? What have you done to me?"

"Here, check this place out," Freddie said, handing his fiancé the laptop. "This place is supposed to be really good for weddings. They offer chicken, salmon, steak and-"

"Ham!" Sam read happily.

"And they have all sorts of other food," Freddie continued. "Mashed potatoes, creamed corn, rice, French fries-"

"Book them," Sam said, wiping the small string of drool from her mouth. "They sound perfect."

"Now what about the cake?" Freddie asked. "That might be a little harder to find online."

"You didn't think I'd forget about _that_, did you?" Sam said, smiling. "I went to this bakery by the mall last week and set up an appointment for us to taste some cakes this afternoon."

"Cool," Freddie nodded. "You know what, now I think we're done."

"Wow, that only took an hour," Sam commented, looking at her phone. "And Carly was freaking out. She was saying that it would take weeks."

"Why don't we go grab some breakfast," Freddie said. "And then come back here…my mom's going to be gone until tonight."

"Really?" Sam grinned. "Well then come on. Let's hurry up and eat so we can come back here and do…things."

"Don't have to tell me twice," Freddie laughed, pulling her to her feet.

The couple hurried out Freddie's door, but as Freddie was locking up, Carly came out from her own apartment.

"I thought you guys were going to be doing wedding plans all day?" she said. "You used my catalogs, right?"

"We finished," Sam told her. "I don't know what you were talking about; it only took an hour."

"Yeah, we got flowers, a band and food," Freddie nodded. "Piece of cake."

"Are-are you serious?" Carly frowned. "You're not done!"

"What do you mean?" Sam asked. "What else is there? Freddie got his tux, I got my dress and we're going down to look at cakes today."

"What else? Did you even discuss tablecloths? Placemats? Plate patterns? Oh, and what about centerpieces and seating charts? And did you-"

Sam and Freddie exchanged glances.

"Er, actually Carls," Sam said. "We were just coming over here to get you. See, we felt bad that we left you out of the planning, so we decided to leave that stuff for you to do."

"Wow, really?" Carly asked, perking up.

"Yup," Freddie nodded. "You do whatever you'd like with all that."

"You guys are the best!" Carly cried, wrapping her arms around both of them. "Oh my God, this is so exciting; I'm going to start right now! I'll call you when I'm finished, which probably won't be for weeks; I'll be so busy!"

"Well, that was easy," Sam shrugged. "Placemats? Who would've thought of placemats?"


	138. Chapter 138

**AN- I got a request to do another future fic with Sam and Freddie's kids, so here it is! Oh, and Seddddddie, if you're reading this, I didn't forget about you! I'll have your story up next chapter!**

…**.**

_Death_

"Stupid mailman got skid marks all over our driveway," Sam said angrily, tossing the pile of mail onto the kitchen counter. "So I called him out on it today and he threatened to call the cops on me! Can you believe that?"

"Um, Sam," Freddie said. "Those skid marks are from _your _car. Remember? You were rushing to the store to buy Jason supplies he needed for his school project that was due the next day?"

"Oh," Sam said, blinking. "Well, maybe I shouldn't have called the mailman a brain dead useless lump of monkey fur then."

"Probably not," Freddie said, grinning at his wife.

"Oh well," Sam sighed. "Hey, did you remember to change the water in Miko's cage?"

"Oh…Miko," Freddie frowned. "No. I try not to think about that stupid bird if I can help it."

"I know, I know," Sam nodded. "That thing wouldn't shut up yesterday! All afternoon he kept reciting the theme song to _The Cosby Show_."

Miko was the colorful parrot that Sam and Freddie both detested to the highest degree. He was their five-year old daughter Emma's pet. She had won it at a carnival that she had gone to with Carly without her parents three months ago, and since then Sam and Freddie had to suffer through continuous squawking and annoying T.V. show phrases reiterated by the bird.

"Are you sure the mailman didn't make those skid marks?" Sam asked Freddie as she followed him into the living room where Miko's cage was. "I never liked that guy; he seems like trouble."

"Sam, just because he delivered you _Bacon Digest_ a day late doesn't mean-hey. What's wrong with Miko?"

The parrot, which usually sat on the perch of his cage making as much noise possible, was laying at the bottom of the cage; motionless.

"Is he asleep?" Sam asked.

"Birds don't sleep like that," Freddie frowned.

"Well then poke it," Sam said.

"I'm not going to poke it! You do it!"

"Why me?"

"Because last week I spent nineteen hours putting together the new entertainment system," Freddie said triumphantly. "Which means I'm one point ahead!"

"Right, and how many points do I get for giving birth to your four kids?" Sam asked, crossing her arms. "With a combined 43 hours of labor?"

Freddie groaned. "You know, one day you've got to stop using that excuse."

He grabbed a pen from the coffee table and began prodding the bird. "Miko, oh Miko," Freddie said. "Wake up you stupid parrot."

But the bird didn't move.

"Is-Is he dead?" Sam frowned.

"I think so," Freddie nodded.

"I guess that's why the house was so quiet this morning," Sam said.

"How do you think he died?" Freddie asked.

"I don't know," Sam shrugged. "You probably did it, you tell me."

"I didn't do it!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Oh come on, you hated that bird," Sam grinned. "So did I, but still, killing it?"

"You did it," Freddie accused. "You hated that bird since it got here!"

"I did not! You-"

"Mommy! Daddy!" Emma called, running into the house from the backyard where she had been playing.

Sam and Freddie instantly stopped fighting and stepped in front of the birdcage to block it from their daughter's view.

"I dug up a bunch of bugs and worms to give Miko," she said proudly, holding out her dirt-covered hand.

"Wow, really?" Sam said. "That's-that's great, sweetheart."

"I'm going to give Miko his bugs now," Emma said, stepping towards the cage.

"Hey, wouldn't you rather have some candy instead?" Sam said quickly, picking up Emma and turning her to face the other way.

"Yeah!" Emma said happily.

"Okay, we'll go get you some from the kitchen," Sam said. "Here, we'll just give daddy the bugs first though."

She took the insects and worms from Emma's hand and quickly shoved them into Freddie's.

"Gee, thanks," Freddie said.

"Alright, Em, let's get you some sugar," Sam said. As she headed towards the kitchen she looked back and Freddie and mouthed, "Get rid of it!"

"So what kind of candy do you want?" Sam asked, setting Emma down on the countertop. "Jelly beans? Carmel swirls? The good chocolate mommy keeps for herself?"

"Um…" Emma said thoughtfully.

"Or you know what, just take it all," Sam said, not being able to stand the look of innocence's on the poor girl's face.

"Yay! Thank you, mommy!"

Freddie walked into the kitchen carrying a shoebox.

"Is it in there?" Sam whispered, walking over to Freddie so that Emma couldn't hear.

Freddie nodded. "And I think I know how the bird died. Its beak was full of birdseed. Must've chocked eating."

"Stupid thing," Sam muttered. "So how are you going to tell Emma?"

"Me?" Freddie frowned. "No way! I'm not doing it!"

"Come on, you can't make me do it!" Sam pleaded.

"We'll do it together," Freddie said. "We just need to think of a calm, delicate way to tell her."

"What if we buy her the new bike she wants?" Sam suggested.

"How will that do anything?" Freddie asked.

"Well she'll be so happy with the bike she'll forget about being sad!" Sam explained.

"Interesting…" Freddie said thoughtfully. "Or we could just break the news to her while she's watching _Tim and Larry_; you know how happy she is when she watches that show."

"Yeah, and then once she finds out her bird died in the middle of it she'll never want to watch it again," Sam pointed out. "I rely on that show to keep those kids quiet for one hour a day, Freddie. You can't take that away from me! Let's just do the stupid bike idea!"

"Fine," Freddie said. "You keep her busy while I go out and buy the-"

"Hey, where's Miko?"

Sam and Freddie looked back at the counter. Emma was no longer sitting there. She must've wandered into the living room while Sam and Freddie were fighting and was now standing in front of the birdcage.

"Crab," Sam mumbled.

"Did he get out of his cage again?" Emma asked, looking around the room as though expecting to see her bird flying around near the ceiling. "Miko! Where are you?"

"Um, sweetie, why don't you come and sit down on the couch with me and mommy?" Freddie said gently.  
"But I have to find Miko," Emma said.

"Listen, Emma," Sam said as her daughter sat down between her and Freddie. "Miko…he, um…hey, do you want a new bike?"

"Sam…" Freddie said. He picked up Emma and placed her on his lap. "You see, Emma, Miko-Miko, well he, er-"

"Yeah, not so easy, is it?" Sam hissed.

"Where's my bird?" Emma asked. "Is he at the vet?"

"No, no, honey," Sam said. "Do-Do you remember Jason's goldfish? Spotty?"

Emma nodded. "He had to go on a vacation down the toilet, right?"

"Um, kind of," Freddie said. "See, Spotty had died. That's why we don't have him around anymore."

"But dying is like sleeping, right?" Emma asked.

"No," Sam said softly. "Um, when-when someone, or something, dies…they don't wake up."

"Ever?" Emma asked, her eyes widening.

Sam shook her head. "No."

"Oh," Emma said. "Someone should tell Jason that then. He probably misses Spotty."

"Yeah, okay," Freddie said. "But the reason we brought that up was because Miko…Miko also died sweetie."

"W-What?"

Sam and Freddie looked at each other as their tiny daughter's eyes began to fill with tears. They could practically hear the others' heart breaking.

"So-So I never get to see Miko again?" Emma asked, tears now falling freely from her eyes. "He's sleeping forever?"

"I'm afraid so, Em," Sam said gently, stroking her hair as she buried her head into Freddie's shoulder, sobbing.

"But that's not fair!" she wailed. "I loved Miko!"

It was true. When Emma had first brought the bird home, Sam and Freddie were convinced that within a week she would lose interest in him and they would then be able to give it to some pet store. But for the past three months Emma had played with Miko, fed Miko and even read as much as she could from her picture books to him every night.

"I know baby, it's not fair," Freddie said.

"Is-Is Miko in that shoebox?" Emma asked, lifting her head to look at the box on the coffee table.

"Yeah," Sam said. "Daddy put him in there for you."

"Can I put his favorite toy in there with him?" she sniffed.

"Um, sure," Freddie nodded. "And hey, you know what; we can have a nice funeral for Miko right now."

"Yeah," Sam agreed. "We'll dig a hole and we'll bury him right underneath that tree he got stuck in last week and daddy had to climb up and get him."

"Can I dig the hole?"

"Yes you can," Freddie said.

Emma slowly got up and headed to the backyard.

"That," Sam said. "Was the worst thing I've ever had to do in my life."

"I swear, my heart's broken in at least ten places," Freddie said. "She cried!"

"I know, I know," Sam sighed. "You know how attached to that bird she was."

"Yup," Freddie said, looking at the empty cage.

"You know we're going to have to get her a new parrot," Sam said.

"Oh yeah," Freddie nodded.

…

**AN- I'm going to be unable to update until Sunday; I'm very sorry, but I'm going to be out of town going to my college for freshmen Orientation and I will not have time to write. **


	139. Chapter 139

**AN- Another oneshot written as a request; hope you like it!**

…**..**

_Flaw_

Sam and Freddie sat silently on Spencer's couch as Spencer himself paced back and forth in front of the couple.

"Um, it's kind of late," Freddie finally said, breaking the silence. "Maybe we should-"

"You are not going anywhere!" Spencer exclaimed.

"Come on, don't you think you're overreacting just a little bit?" Sam said.

"I am not!" Spencer cried. "I'm reacting perfectly reasonable for someone who just walked in on-on what I just had to witness!"

"Well, if you would've knocked before coming into my apartment," Freddie mumbled.

"Oh, are we all of the sudden knocking people?" Spencer asked. "I didn't think it would be such a big deal to walk across the hall and see my good friend Freddie. But no, I open the door and see you and my little sister's best friend…ugh! I don't even want to think about it!"

Sam, whose face was already red from embarrassment, looked at the floor.

"I-I don't even know where to _start _with you two!" Spencer continued angrily.

"Look, Sam and I have been dating for three years," Freddie pointed out.

"Yeah, and it's not like we're even in high school anymore," Sam nodded. "So I don't see what the big deal is if-"

"You, young lady, are too, too young for that sort of activity!" Spencer yelled.

"Young lady?" Sam repeated.

"Yes," Spencer nodded. "And I think the appropriate age for you to be doing…_that_ is forty three."

"What?"

"Forty three," Spencer said firmly. "Or you know what, why don't we just make it for when I die so I won't have to live through it happening!"

"But we weren't even doing…_that_…yet" Freddie reminded him.

"Oh I watch the Nature Channel!" Spencer snapped. "I know where that whole thing was going!"

"Spencer," Sam groaned. "Come on, this is ridiculous. How about you just go to bed and we'll leave and we'll try to pretend this whole thing never happened. I mean, I'm going try to, at least."

"No, no," Spencer said. "And it looks like I'm going to have to do the one thing I never wanted to have to do."

"Join a gym?" Freddie guessed.

"Hey! No! We're going to have 'The Talk'."

Sam and Freddie exchanged glances. "The Talk?"

"Yes," Spencer nodded. "Now I get that when two people are in love, they get those 'feelings' towards each other-"

"Oh my God," Sam mumbled, burying her head in her hands. "Please tell me this isn't happening."

"And I know that those feelings can be hard not to act on," he continued.

"Okay, okay," Freddie said quickly. "Look, Spencer, me and Sam both took health class in high school, so we pretty much know all of that."

"What? They teach this stuff in high school now?" Spencer exclaimed. "I'm going to be writing a _very_ strongly worded email to the school board tomorrow."

"Can we go now?" Sam asked. "I think we've all had enough awkwardness to last us a while."

"_You_ can go," Spencer told her. "I still have some things to discuss with Freddie."

Freddie gulped as Sam quickly got to her feet and left her boyfriend to his fate.

"Um, so," Freddie began nervously. "You see that new _Galaxy Wars _trailer? It's in 3D and everything; I think that will-"

"Freddie," Spencer said in a serious voice he almost never used. "Listen, you have no idea how much I want to punch you in the face right now."

"You-you do?"

"I won't," Spencer told him. "Because we're buds and I've known you for years and I know you're a good guy."

"Oh, um, thank you?"

"You just have to understand," Spencer sighed. "Sam's practically my second little sister. Now you're not an older brother so you can't possible imagine the feeling I get whenever I think about Carly _or _Sam doing, you know, _anything_ with boys."

Freddie nodded.

"I'm not a _complete _idiot," he went on. "I knew on some level that you and Sam were…well…but then to have it confirmed when I walked into your apartment? Yeah, I guess I did sort of overreact, but it was just sort of a reflex."

"I understand," Freddie nodded. "And I'm really sorry you had to see what you saw. I guess maybe we should've locked the door before we-"

"Don't say it!" Spencer yelled.

"Sorry."

"Okay, here's what we're going to do," Spencer said. "You're going to go back to your apartment, ALONE, and tomorrow when I see you and Sam we're going to act like this whole thing never even happened. And you and Sam are going to make sure that I _never_ find out what you guys do when you have your alone time, or next time, I just might hit you, are we clear?"

"Um, yeah?" Freddie nodded.

"Good," Spencer said. "So are we still on for out World of Warlords quest tomorrow?"

"Er, sure?"

"Great! I just found this new sword by the River of Revival that will _kill_ your orc!"

"I look forward to it," Freddie said, slowly walking towards the door. "I-I guess I'll see you tomorrow then."

Freddie shut the door behind him.

"How bad was it?" Sam asked. She had been leaning against the wall, waiting for him.

"It was…weird," Freddie said. "Spencer's just really overprotective of you."

"Imagine how bad he must be with the guys Carly dates," Sam said.

"I would not want to be them," Freddie laughed.

"Yeah, well, you know, I guess it's sort of sweet that he's looking after me," Sam said. "I don't really have anyone else to do that for me."

"I didn't know he could be so…scary," Freddie said. "I thought I was going to pee my pants in there."

"And here I was thinking all these years that his inability to frighten even a puppy was his biggest flaw," Sam grinned.

"Who knows what other traits he's hiding from us," Freddie nodded. He looked at his watch. "Hey, it's almost one. I don't think you should drive home this late; why don't you just sleep over here still?"

"Yeah, okay," Sam nodded. "But just so you know, we're not doing anything else tonight."

"I figured that," Freddie nodded. "Spencer nearly having an aneurism kind of dampens the mood, doesn't it?"


	140. Chapter 140

**AN- Another request! Hope you enjoy this; it takes place during the Seddie Arc. (By the way, I love taking requests from you guys, so if you have any, don't be shy; tell me them!)**

…**.**

_Finish _

"I'm mad at Gibby too, baby," Freddie said as Sam angrily bit into a French fry at the Groovy Smoothie. "He shouldn't have told my mom we were dating, but still, you've got to admit you were a little violent with him."

"He's a big guy, he can handle it," Sam mumbled.

"Well, I guess he wasn't hurt _too_ bad," he sighed. "He should be bruise-free within a week. I'm just worried about that giant bald spot he's sporting now."

"Serves him right," Sam said, taking a sip of her smoothie. "Hey, I'm going to get some more napkins."

"I'll order us another round of smoothies," Freddie said, standing up with her. "I think we should stay here for awhile until Gibby cools off."

"Probably a good idea," Sam nodded.

The couple walked to the counter, but instead of seeing T-Bo at the register, there was a teenage boy.

"Two Raspberry Kiwi Tangos," Freddie said. "And one more order of fries."

"Eight forty-three," the boy said. Freddie pulled out his wallet and handed him the bills while Sam grabbed a handful of napkins.

"It will be ready in a minute," the boy said. He turned to Sam and handed her a slip of paper. "And that's for you."

"What's this?" Sam frowned, looking at the blank slip.

"For you to write your number on," he grinned.

"Hey!" Freddie exclaimed before Sam could respond. "I happen to be her boyfriend!"

"Sure you are," the boy laughed. "Seriously, what would a hot blonde like her be doing with someone like you."

"He is my boyfriend, you Ratstab," Sam snapped. "So why don't you take your zit covered face and try your lame moves on someone else."

"So does that mean you're interested on going a hot date with me?" the boy asked.

"Yeah, like that will happen," Sam said, throwing the paper back at him. She grabbed the food and smoothies from the counter and headed back to her and Freddie's table.

Freddie, who was still glaring at the boy, slowly turned to follow her.

"I've never tried the raspberry kiwi with fries," Sam said, taking the lid off her smoothie and sticking a fry in it. "Hey, it's actually pretty good."

"Stupid jerk," Freddie mumbled, snatching his smoothie off the table and sipping it irritably as he kept looking at the boy at the counter. He was still staring at Sam, clearly checking her out.

"Too bad T-Bo told me I couldn't use the butter sock on his employees or he'd start charging me for their injuries," Sam said. "Whatever, just ignore him."

"How can I ignore somebody ogling my girlfriend?" Freddie said.

"Relax, nub, it's not like I'm going to ditch you to run over there with him," Sam said, rolling her eyes as Freddie continued to glare at the boy. "He's not even remotely attractive, anyway."

"You think I could complain about him to T-Bo?" Freddie asked, ignoring her. "Where is he, anyway?"

"In Miami helping his sister's dog move into some new Dog Condo," Sam replied. "He won't be back until Monday, remember?"

"Chiz," Freddie mumbled. The boy was now winking at Sam, making Freddie's blood boil even more.

"Look, if you're going to be so intense about that guy, why don't we just take our food and head back to my place?" Sam sighed. "My mom's at her new job at the piercing joint so we'd be alone."

"Good idea," Freddie nodded.

"Let me just run to the bathroom first," Sam told him, getting up.

Freddie waited until she was out of sight before standing back up and walking over to the counter again.

"Knew she couldn't be with you," the boy commented. "Scared her off? Now at least I can have a go with her."

"Just give me and an extra large Mango Melon Goop," Freddie snapped. "And for your information, she didn't leave me."

"Yet," the boy said, pouring the smoothie ingredients into the blender and flipping the switch on.

Freddie just narrowed his eyes, but didn't say anything.

"Are you ready to go?" Sam asked, walking over to Freddie's side.

"Almost," Freddie nodded. "I just have to finish one thing."

"Here's your smoothie," the boy said, sliding a very large cup over to Freddie. He looked over at Sam. "Come on, honey, you know you could do a lot better than this guy."

Sam opened her mouth to retort, but before she got a chance, Freddie had dumped all 32 ounces of his very sticky smoothie onto the boy's head.

"Alright," Freddie said, smiling happily as he watched the goopy contents slide down the boy's body. "We can go now."

"Dude!" Sam exclaimed, grinning from ear to ear. "Did you really just do that?"

"Yes, I did," he said, satisfied.

"Baby, that was amazing!" she said, throwing her arms around him. "Who knew you had the guts to do something so…me?"

"I guess when you date someone, they start to rub off on you," Freddie smiled.


	141. Chapter 141

**AN- So this is another request. I'm writing the request oneshots in the order I get them, so if you requested something, don't worry, I'll have it up in the next chapters. I'm still taking requests if anybody still wants to send me one!**

…

_Judgment_

"Sam, feel my pulse," Freddie said, holding his wrist out to Sam. "It's twice as fast as it should be!"

"Then stop freaking out," Sam told him. "Honestly, you'd think you're about to go off to war or something, the way you're acting."

"The guy hates me!" Freddie exclaimed. "And he knows 'people' that can have me hurt!"

"Why the air quotes around people?"

"I don't know!" Freddie cried. "You see how disoriented this is making me?"

"Look, Uncle Carmine doesn't hate you," Sam said. "And he's not going to have you hurt."

"That's not what he told me at our wedding," Freddie pointed out. "While I was getting ready he came into the room and told me if I ever did anything to you he would call his buddies from prison to come after me!"

"Are you planning on doing anything?" Sam asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No, of course not," Freddie said quickly.

"Then what are you worried about?" Sam said. "Come on, the judge said that he didn't think Uncle Carmine was dangerous anymore-"

"Clearly that judge needs better judgment," Freddie mumbled.

"He's only staying here for a few days," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "He really wants to see Jason; all he's seen are the pictures I've sent to the jail. You'll be fine, you baby."

"We'll see about that," Freddie said under his breath.

…

"Sammy!"

"Hey, Uncle Carmine!" Sam smiled, running to give her uncle a hug as he walked through the front door of the Benson house. "How's it going? It's been ages since I've seen you!"

"I know, lousy prison, restricting my visitation rights just because of one little fight," Carmine nodded. "The guy was asking for it! He called me a stubrag! Now, where's this little guy I've been hearing so much about?"

"Come here, Jason," Sam said to her and Freddie's three-year old son who was standing behind his mother's leg shyly. "This is your Uncle Carmine."

"Hey there, Jason," Carmine grinned, kneeling down so he could look at the toddler better. "I've got something for you."

"A present?" Jason asked excitedly, his shyness evaporating at once.

"Shoosh yeah, a present," he grinned, pulling a box out of his bag. "Here you go, buddy."

"Wow, a squirt gun!" he exclaimed, tearing open the package.

"A squirt bazooka," Carmine corrected. "That thing has the water pressure of an industrial house."

"Cool! Can I use it now?"

"I'd be insulted if you didn't," Carmine nodded.

"Thank you, Uncle Carmine!" Jason yelled over his shoulder as he hurried out to the backyard to play with his new toy.

"Lucky that kid looks like you," Carmine said to Sam.

"Nah, he looks more like Freddie," Sam said.

"Don't worry, the Puckett in him will overthrow that," he said. "Speaking of which, where is your nub of a husband?"

"He was here," Sam said, looking over her shoulder into the living room. "I don't know where he got to-"

Just then the sliding glass door that led to the backyard opened and a dripping wet Freddie sloshed into the house.

"Babe, why are you wet?" Sam frowned as her husband came over.

"Jason sprayed me with that great new toy of his," Freddie said.

"Ha, it works!" Carmine grinned, high fiving Sam.

"Yeah, yeah it does," Freddie said with a strained smile. "Er, it's-it's good to see you again…sir."

"You've been keeping my Sammy happy, right?" Carmine said in a menacing voice. "Because it would be a shame if she wasn't. That might mean me stepping in to…resolve the problem."

Freddie's eyes widened. "I-I, yes, yes she's happy. No-No need to resolve any problems. Please."

Carmine and Sam exchanged glances and laughed.

"I've missed that sense of humor," Sam said, still smiling. "Oh, I have to show you these awesome numchucks that I got at this MMA expo last week! Wait here and I'll go grab them."

Freddie, cursing his luck that he was now left completely alone with Carmine, turned back to the large man. "Um, so…any-any plans now that you're out of prison?"

"Don't try to make innocent small talk with me," Carmine said sternly, taking a step towards Freddie. "Don't think I forgot what I told you on your wedding day."

"But-But I haven't done anything to Sam," Freddie said, feeling his heart beating very quickly in his thoracic cavity. "I told you that!"

"You better make sure it stays that way," he said, jabbing a finger at Freddie's chest. "If I ever find out you make her cry, make her angry, there's going to be nothing left of you but that ridiculous polo shirt you're wearing. If I ever find out you've even so much as _looked_ at another woman, you're going to just…disappear."

"Disappear?" Freddie gulped.

"Disappear," Carmine nodded. "Am I making myself perfectly clear?"

"Y-Yes," Freddie said. "You-You don't need to worry though...sir. I love Sam, I would never hurt her."

"I know you won't," Carmine said. "Because if you do, you'll have me to face. And you wouldn't want that, would you?"

"No, I would not," Freddie said in a squeaky voice.

"Good," Carmine said. "Looks like you really _are_ a smart one."

"Check these out," Sam said, running back into the room with a pair of numchucks. "You could really knock a guy out with these!"

"Very nice craftsmanship," Carmine commented, examining the numchucks. "Who knows, maybe I'll give them a whirl while I'm here." He looked at Freddie as he said this, causing poor Freddie's knees to buckle. "Now where's your bathroom in this place? I need to take a wicked wazz."

"That door right there," Sam told him.

"You guys get ready to go when I'm done," Carmine told them. "I'm taking you all out for some Italian food; my treat!"

"Awesome," Sam grinned. Once Carmine had left the room, she turned to Freddie. "You see? He's taking us out for dinner; I don't know what you were worried about."

"Give me these," Freddie said, grabbing the numchucks from his wife.

"Dude, what are you doing?"

"We've got to hide everything in this house that can be used to hurt me," Freddie said. "I've got to go get all of the butter out of the fridge…"


	142. Chapter 142

**AN- Thanks for all the requests, they'll be up in the order they're received Also, if you already sent in one and it's been published, feel free to send in another one!**

…**.**

_Duck_

"Which is why there's no possible way any Sky Naut _or _NugNug could ever beat Boogie Bear in a fight," Sam said as her and her boyfriend, Freddie, drove.

"You're insane," Freddie argued from the passenger seat. "Every character from the _Galaxy Wars _universe has special skills and all sorts of advanced weapons. What's Boogie Bear have? His ability to get stuck in trees?"

"He's curious," Sam defended. "So are we almost there, Benson?"

"Sam, we're going to North Carolina," Freddie replied. "We're not even out of our time zone yet."

"Tell me again why we couldn't just fly there?" she moaned.

"Come on, baby, every couple needs one road trip in their relationship," Freddie told her. "This is our last real summer. In the fall we'll be going off to college, and I know that we're still going to manage to see each other, but we know it won't be as frequently. We need to strengthen the bond of our relationship now so that when that time comes, we'll be able to handle it."

"You've been watching Oprah reruns again, haven't you?"

"…Maybe. Wait, Sam, you were supposed to get off at this exit."

"I know where I'm going, Freddie," Sam said.

"But these directions were very specific," he said, holding out the sheet of paper he and written down the directions on. "I spent an hour copying them down from Map Hunt."

"Oh, let me see them?"

"I think there's a place where you can get off and circle back to the exit," Freddie said, handing her the paper. "Just keep going south and-Sam!"

Sam had just rolled down the window and tossed the paper out.

"Why would you do that?"

"Because I know you," Sam replied. "You're going to obsesses over those directions the whole trip."

"Yeah, but now we're going to be lost!"

"I told you, I know where we're going."

"That's what everyone says right before they get lost," Freddie sighed, knowing it would be useless to argue any further with his girlfriend.

"Alright, so keep me entertained now," Sam said.

"Fine, seeing as we're going to be in this car for a while since we're lost…Okay, who would win in a fair fist fight? Carly or Neville?"

"Carly, easy," Sam laughed. "And that's saying something for Neville; that girl's got the fighting abilities of a dead koala."

"I'll give you a harder one then; my mom or Shelby Marx?"

"That is hard," Sam said. "Your mom _does _have some freaky fighting skills, though she only uses them when she thinks you're in trouble."

The couple continued playing games and talking. Freddie was actually enjoying himself so much in Sam's company that he forgot all about the directions. That is, until it began getting dark and he realized that the road Sam had been driving on for the past hour was pretty deserted.

"I'm hungry," Sam announced.

"Well I had it all planed out for us to stop at this very nice park in Utah for a picnic dinner," Freddie told her. "But seeing as we're nowhere _near_ that park…"

"There's a park right there," Sam said, pointing at a small field area with a single picnic table.

"You're not serious," Freddie frowned. "Doesn't that place look a little…run down?"

"You're just a priss," Sam laughed, pulling the car over to the side of the road and parking it right next to the park. "We're going to eat there, not live there. I'm sure you'll be fine."

Before Freddie could open his mouth again, Sam had already hopped out of the driver's seat and had gone around to the back of the car to get the picnic basket.

"Sam, there's a graveyard like fifty yards from here," Freddie said, getting out the car to join her, pointing to a bunch of tombstones a distance away.

"Hmm, cool, huh?"

"Cool?" Freddie repeated. "Yeah, that's a normal reaction to a graveyard."

Sam set the picnic basket down on the table and opened it. "Alright, what do we have in here?"

"Roast beef subs, pork rinds for you, carrot slices for me, and some fat cakes for desert," Freddie replied. "Oh, and a two liter bottle of mountain fizz."

"Awesome, let's eat," she said, tossing Freddie his food.

"Wish I would've brought a flash light from the car," Freddie said, taking a bite of his sub.

"You know," Sam said, grinning. "This is just how that movie we saw last week started. Attractive couple in a deserted area, or well, half-attractive, in the dark…some sort of crazed killer is probably waiting over there by the tombstones to attack us."

"Sam, stop," Freddie said.

"Relax, baby, I'm only kidding," she laughed. "You know, this place is actually a lot better than some big fancy Utah park."

"How is that?" Freddie asked. "That park would've at least had lights."

"Yeah, and a ton of people," she pointed out. "I kind of like that we're alone…"

She put down her sandwich and put her arms around Freddie's neck and pulled him into a long, passionate kiss."

"Maybe this place does have its perks," Freddie said, smiling when they pulled apart.

"I told you," Sam grinned. She stuffed the last of her sandwich into her mouth. "But we should probably still get going if we're going to make it to North Carolina by Friday."

"Yeah, good idea," he nodded, thankful to get out of this park, which was becoming increasingly creepy by the minute.

"Hold on," Sam said. "I have to go pee."

"But there's no bathrooms."

"There's trees, genius," she said.

"Oh. Well, let me just go put the picnic basket back in the car and then I'll go with you to find-"

"Um, no," Sam said quickly.

"What do you mean? You're not going to go over to those woods by yourself, are you?"

"I don't want people around when I pee," Sam said. "You especially."

"Why not? It's not like-"

"Look, Freddie, there has to be _some _mystery in this relationship," Sam said. "I'll be back in like two minutes. You just wait here and then we'll leave."

"Well, I guess…" Freddie said, still a little hesitant to let his girlfriend go off into the dark woods by herself. "Just be quick, okay."

"I will," she assured him, giving him a short peck before running off towards the woods.

Freddie had to admire Sam's bravery; if he ever had to go into the woods alone in the dark…well, let's just say he wouldn't need to pee anymore.

Freddie leaned against the picnic table, trying hard not to turn his head towards the graveyard. He hoped they'd follow this road back to civilization soon. He checked his watch. Where was Sam? It had been nearly five minutes. He knew it was a little more…difficult for a girl to go to the bathroom in the woods, but still, what was taking her so-?

Suddenly, he heard a loud scream coming from the woods; in the direction that Sam had gone.  
"Sam?" Freddie cried, dropping the basket.

There was another scream, and this time Freddie was sure it was Sam. Forgetting how much he wanted to leave this dark area, Freddie darted towards the woods.

"Sam?" he called, desperately looking around for her. "Sam? Where are-Sam?"

He had nearly run into her.

"What's wrong?" he asked, grabbing her shoulders to help her regain her balance.

"There's something moving in that bush!" she exclaimed. "I was over there when I heard something moving!"

Freddie looked at the bush, and sure enough, it gave a shake. Sam grabbed his arm. "Let's just go, Freddie."

"Yeah, okay," Freddie nodded eagerly, feeling his heart beating about twice its usual pace. "Let's just-"

Just then the bush gave another shake, and as Sam screamed again, a small creature came out of it.

"Wait," Freddie frowned. "Is that a-"

"It's a duck," Sam said, letting go of Freddie's arm.

"It must live in that lake over by the table," Freddie said.

"Probably," Sam mumbled. "Stupid thing…come on, let's get out of here."

"Wow, you were really scared, weren't you?" Freddie grinned as the couple headed out of the woods and back to their car.

"No I wasn't, you nub," she snapped.

"Oh please, you looked more terrified than that girl in the movie about the flesh eating clown," he laughed.

"Shut up!"

"And it was just a little duck," he said, still smiling.

"Ducks are terrible creatures, if you must know," she said, crossing her arms. "They're loud and annoying and they chase little kids and they just come on over and steal your food and then won't leave you alone."

"Mhmm," Freddie nodded, opening the car door.

"And they can barely fly," Sam continued. "What kind of lame thing has wings but hardly uses them?"

"Just admit it, Sam, you were scared," Freddie grinned.

"No I wasn't!" she said firmly. "Stop saying that!"

"Okay, okay," Freddie conceded. "I'll stop."

"Thank you," she mumbled, starting the car.

Freddie waited a moment, and then turned to his girlfriend. "You're still the bravest girl I know."

"You better believe it," she said, though Freddie could see in the moonlight that she was blushing.

…

**AN- I got that one line about having mystery in a relationship from How I Met Your Mother. I felt bad just taking the line without giving the show any credit. **


	143. Chapter 143

_Swallow_

"A cooking class?" Sam frowned as Freddie led her into a room in the Seattle Community Center. "_This_ is your big surprise for us?"

"What? I thought you liked cooking," Freddie pointed out as the couple headed over to an empty cooking station to wait for instruction.

"I do," Sam nodded. "But not when I'm going to be in a _classroom_. That's school, Fredbag. I left that place fifteen years ago and I didn't plan on going back."

"Look, you wanted a night away from the kids," Freddie said. "So I, being the wonderful husband that I am, went to all the trouble to sign us up for this."

"Baby, just fyi, when your wife says she wants a night away from the kids," Sam said. "Take her to a snazzy restaurant and a movie she won't fall asleep in. Not a class at the community center."

"You're not even giving it a chance," he said. "And you know, you do get to eat whatever you cook."

"You do?" Sam asked. "For real?"

"Uh-huh," Freddie grinned.

"Alright, I'll give this chiz a chance," Sam sighed. "But for your sake, you'd better hope we're not cooking anything vegetarian."

"I promise, if we do, I'll take you out to that steakhouse where it costs forty dollars just for the soup," he told her.

"Okay, class," a lady who looked to be about in her sixties said, stepping to the kitchen station at the front of your class. "It looks like we're all ready to begin. I know we're all anxious to find out what we'll be cooking today, so I won't keep you in anticipation any longer! Today we'll be preparing cherry cobbler!"

"You see? You love cobbler," Freddie whispered to Sam.

"Excuse me, sir in the striped polo," the teacher said, looking back at Freddie. "No talking during instruction, please."

"Er, sorry," he mumbled as Sam smirked.

"If everyone would please follow along with me with the ingredients at your station," the teacher continued. "First you will wash your cherries and de-pit them."

"Hopefully this cobbler tastes better than the blueberry cobbler Carly tried to make for the Fourth of July last year," Sam said as the class began the first step. "Remember it pulled out one of Spencer's fillings?"

"Well if we just follow the teacher's directions, I can't see how we can go wrong," Freddie said, rinsing off his cherries. "Just try to listen, Sam."

"Relax, will you?" Sam said. "You're just lucky I'm not throwing spit balls at this lady. You know, she sort of looks like Ms. Briggs, only her boobs aren't as pointy."

"Now that everybody's cherry's are nice and clean and de-pitted," the teacher said. "You're going to mix in three-fourths a cup of sugar into the cherries. It will make your cobbler nice and sweet."

"Really? Because I was under the impression that sugar would make the cherries salty," Sam mumbled under her breath.

"Be nice," Freddie whispered.

"I am being nice," Sam retorted.

"Alright, now in a separate bowl, stir together one cup of flour, a teaspoon of baking soda and a pinch of salt," the teacher instructed.

"You know," Sam said, mixing the ingredients together. "If we bailed now, I bet we could still get tickets for that that movie with the killer army of bambie dolls."

"We're not bailing," Freddie said firmly. "This is a perfectly fun date night. Besides, I paid one hundred bucks for us to take this class."

"A hundred bucks?" Sam exclaimed. "Dude, you totally got ripped off by a community center!"

"Like those trampoline shoes you bought last week weren't a rip off? Hey!"

Sam had just threw a handful of flour at her husband, leaving his face and shirt white as a ghost.

"Uh oh," the teacher said, walking over to Sam and Freddie's station. "Looks like somebody's a bit of a klutzy Suzie."

"No, no, actually, it was her who-" Freddie stared, but the teacher didn't let him finish.

"Here you go," she said, pulling off her pink, frilly apron and putting in over Freddie's shoulders. "Maybe this will help you."

"Oh, um, this-this really isn't necessary," Freddie sputtered, but the teacher had already walked away.

"Wow," Sam smiled, trying to suppress a laugh. "You look pretty sexy in that."

"That's right, laugh it up," Freddie said. "You just wait until my cobbler's better than yours-Are you taking pictures?"

"Well I have to show people this," Sam said. "I can't just keep it to myself; that would be selfish."

"We're almost done now," the teacher said to the class, taking her spot back at the front of the room again. "After you grease your baking pans, pour in your cherry mixture and then pour the flour mixture over it."

"This was easier than I thought," Sam commented as she poured her mixtures into her pan. "I could try this at home some time. The girls' Sunshine Girls leader's always after me to help at that big bake sale they have every summer. Maybe this year I won't tell her you're in the hospital with pancreas problems."

"You give me pretend pancreas problems just to get out of baking?" Freddie asked, amused.

"Hey, I buy plenty of cookies to make up for it."

"You're now going to put your pans in the over at four-fifty for forty minutes!" the teacher called out to the class.

"Ugh, this is why I don't bake," Sam groaned as her and Freddie slid their pans into their oven. "Why can't this stuff bake faster?"

"You need to be patient," Freddie told her.

"Well what are we supposed to here for forty minutes?"

"We could talk," Freddie suggested. "Of walk around the community center and see if we can find any other classes that interest us, or-and you're asleep."

It was true; Sam had slumped down against the counters and was now fast asleep.

Chuckling at his wife's behavior, Freddie slid down next to her and proceeded to busy himself playing Scribble Jump on his pearphone. When the timers on the ovens all finally went off, Sam instantly woke up and grabbed her pan from the oven.

"It's about time," she said, staring down at her cobbler.

"Yours looks different than mine," Freddie frowned. His was dark and brittle looking while Sam's looked golden and flakey.

"You may now all go ahead and taste your cobbler!" the teacher said to the class. "I'll walk around and inspect everyone's myself."

"Oh my God, this is so good," Sam said, stuffing a forkful of her cobbler into her mouth. "How's yours?"

"I haven't tried it yet," Freddie said, trying to break a piece of his off. After nearly a minute, he finally managed to get a piece, and placed it in his mouth.

"Gross!" he cried at once, spitting it out into the nearby garbage. "This is disgusting!"

"It can't be that bad," Sam said, taking another bite of her own.

"Try it for yourself," Freddie told her, wiping off his tongue with a napkin.

Sam took his fork and tried a bite of his cobbler. It turned out that Freddie was not exaggerating. Sam's taste buds, which weren't particularly picky when it came to food, seemed to be screaming out in agony and she could not bring herself to swallow the creation.

"Okay," Sam said, spitting the cobbler out as well. "Maybe you've got a point."

"Well what have we here?" the teacher said, stopping at the couple's station again. "Why now this cobbler here looks absolutely amazing! I don't think I could've done a better job myself; which one of you made this?"

"Me," Sam said.

"You certainly seem to have a gift in the kitchen."

"It _is _my favorite room of the house," Sam nodded.

"Now…what happened to this one?" the teacher frowned, looking at Freddie's cobbler.

"I'm not sure," Freddie said. "Maybe it was the oven or something-"

"Let's not go blaming out equipment," the teacher said. She looked more closely at the cobbler. "Well your first problem, sir, was that you didn't grease your pan."

"Oh," Freddie blinked. "I guess I just-"

"And it looks like you forgot to add baking soda," she continued. "And your oven appears to have been turned to 550! It's no wonder your cobbler turned out so abysmally; didn't you listen to my instructions?"

"I-I-"

"He's got a bit of a listening problem," Sam said, putting her arm around Freddie.

"Oh, I see," the teacher nodded understandingly. "Well, don't all men? It's just lucky you were smart enough to pay attention."

"She did not!" Freddie exclaimed, but once again, the teacher walked away from him.

"I don't like her," Freddie mumbled.

"Let's get out of here," Sam said, picking up her pan of cobbler. "Before you burn anything else."

"What was I thinking signing us up for a cooking class," Freddie sighed as the couple headed out of the classroom.

"Hey, I actually had fun tonight," Sam told him, taking his hand.

"You did?"

"Yeah," she nodded. "I got some cobbler, the teacher actually complimented me, plus it _was_ two hours with none of our kids screaming for me, so that's definitely a perk."

"You know, I'm sure Carly won't mind watching them for another couple of hours," Freddie said. "Why don't you and I go and get some forty dollar soup?"

"You know I won't turn that down," Sam grinned. "But babe? You might want to take back that pink apron first."

Freddie looked down and saw that he was still wearing the teacher's apron. "Now I _really_ don't like her," Freddie muttered.


	144. Chapter 144

**AN- Happy Birthday Jennette McCurdy and Arianna Grade! **

…**.**

_Backing_

"Well, I have some more statistics for you," Carly said, letting herself into Sam and Freddie's apartment.

"Carly," Sam moaned, piling plates into a large cardboard box. "Don't you have a job or something?"

"Eh, it's not that important," Carly shrugged, pulling a sheet of paper out of her pocket. "Okay, statistic number one: did you know that people in Chicago weigh 12.4 percent more than people in Seattle?"

"So you're telling me," Freddie said, setting a box of books down on the ground. "That whoever wrote that statistic weighed every person in Seattle, then went to Chicago, weighed everyone there, and then-"

"Statistic number two," Carly continued, ignoring Freddie. "A package of Fat Cakes cost on average twenty-three cents more in Chicago than in Seattle."

"Wait, are you serious about that?" Sam frowned.

"Yes I am," Carly nodded. "See? That's one reason why you shouldn't move all the way to Chicago and stay here in Seattle with me."

"Carly," Freddie said. "We've been over this a million times. Sam and I-"

"I know, I know," Carly moaned. "You got that big job at the Pear Store headquarters there and Sam's going to be working as a choreographer at some fancy dance school nearby. It's perfect for both of you. But do you know how lonely I'm going to be here by myself?"

"You won't be by yourself, though," Sam told her. "You'll still have Gibby and Spencer."

"Plus it won't be like we'll never visit or call," Freddie pointed out. "We promise, we'll video chat at least once a week, and I'm sure you and Sam will be on the phone with each other everyday. And we'll be flying back here for holidays since both our families are here."

"Please, that won't be the same," Carly scoffed. "You guys are my best friends! I just can't believe you're really moving halfway across the country.

"It could be worse," Sam reasoned. "We could be moving to Canada."

"Canada's like two hours away," Carly said. "Why would that be worse?"

"Would you really want to go around saying that your two best friends are Canadians?"

"Okay, maybe you've got a point," Carly sighed. "But what am I going to do here in Seattle all by myself?"

"Hunt down all the hot guys," Sam suggested. "That seems like a Carly thing to do."

"Cute boys can only take me so far," she said sadly. "I'm going to need a girl best friend to talk with and go to Build-A-Bra with, and make fun of the models in magazines and-"

"Carly stop," Sam said. "You're making _me_ feel bad."

"I'm sorry," Carly sniffed, wiping a tear from her eye. "It's just going to be so different without you both here."

"Hey, it's going to be weird for us with out you there," Freddie said. "But…it's just something we'll all have to get used to."

"Yeah, I guess," Carly nodded glumly. "Well, what time does the moving truck get here tomorrow?"

"Six in the morning," he replied.

"Oh…well, I-at least we still have your big going away dinner tonight," she said. "Spencer's making spaghetti tacos and T-Bo's going to let us be the first to try a bunch of new smoothies that he's bringing up."

"We can't wait," Sam grinned. "We'll be over as soon as we finish the rest of this packing."  
"Great," Carly said. "You guys need some help?"

"Yeah, actually, could you run down to our lobby and pick up the last of our mail?"

"Sure, I'll be back in a sec," Carly said, turning and heading out of the apartment.

"Wow," Freddie sighed once Carly was gone. "She's really making this whole moving thing hard; I almost cried during that."

Sam nodded silently.

"Chicago's not _too _far away, though," Freddie said. "Especially by plane."

"I'm still going to miss everybody," Sam mumbled softly.

"Yeah," Freddie said, pulling his wife into a hug. "So am I."

"I mean, I'm really excited for our new jobs," Sam said. "And our house down there's huge; perfect for starting a family, but…"

"I know," he said understandingly. "It still won't be Seattle."

"Yeah," she said. The couple was quiet for a moment. "Well," Sam finally said. "There's no backing out of the move now."

"Who knows," Freddie said. "Someday we may move back here."

"Someday, maybe," Sam agreed.

"Here's your mail," Carly said, walking back into the apartment. "Just some bills and a few ads."

"Thanks," Freddie said, taking the mail from her. "Hey, Carly, I was thinking. Sam and I are pretty much done with all the packing. Why don't the three of us head down to the Groovy Smoothie one last time?"

"Really? That'd be awesome," Carly grinned. "Let's go."

"One bad thing about Chicago," Sam said, grabbing her bag. "There's no Groovy Smoothie. The only smoothie joint near us is some place called Juno Juice or something."

"That sounds gross," Carly cringed. "Hey, you think I could overnight you guys smoothies?"

"Doubt it," Freddie laughed. "But thanks for the offer."


	145. Chapter 145

**AN- I've loved writing all these requests! Please feel free to keep them coming. Also, a couple of people have asked for sequels for certain chapters. I'm happy to write those, but to keep things fair, they'll still be posted in the order I receive the request, meaning that the sequel chapter might not be up until two or three chapters later. I hope this is okay. I'll make note of the fact that the chapter is a sequel to try and avoid any confusion.**

…**.**

_Buy_

"So let me get this straight," Carly frowned. "It's 107 degrees outside?"

"Um, that's correct," Spencer nodded.

"So you proceed to turn our air conditioner on full blast, plus plug in a dozen fans all around the apartment, knowing that Seattle's famous for its mid-summer power outages?"

"I, er, suppose so."

"So here we are, an hour later," Carly continued. "No power and stuck in a hot, sweaty apartment all because you didn't listen to me and keep the air conditioner on its normal level and just plug in _one_ fan?"

"I was hot, okay?" Spencer exclaimed.

"Ugh, why does Seattle always get random heat waves?" Carly moaned, fanning herself with a magazine as she slumped down on the couch.

"Hey," Sam said as her and Freddie let themselves into the apartment.

"Power out here too?" Freddie asked.

"No, we're _choosing_ to sit here in the heat with no lights or air conditioning," Carly snapped.

"Wow, she gets testy in the heat," Sam commented, heading over to the Shay's fridge. "You guys have any frozen pizzas left?"

"No," Carly said. She turned to Freddie. "Sorry for yelling at you; I'm just not good with heat."

"It's cool," Freddie said.

"I'm taking it the power's out at Sam's place too?" Carly asked.

"Yup," Freddie nodded. "So her mom's taking this opportunity to show off her entire bikini collection."

"We ran over here as soon as the fashion show began," Sam shuddered.

"Does Spencer still have that fancy Norwegian air conditioner?" Freddie asked.

"Nah, he traded it at the junk yard for an old tire swing and cuckoo clock," Carly said.

"It was worth it," Spencer said, coming back into the room. "Now I've got a comfy swing in my room and half a cuckoo clock in the bathroom."

"Half?" Freddie frowned.

"I, um, had an incident with a hobo on my way home with it," Spencer mumbled. "I don't like to talk about it."

"You know, this is ridiculous," Carly said, sitting up. "If I'm going to be dying of heat stroke, I might as well be doing something productive while I do it, like working on my tan or drooling over hot guys; why don't we go to the beach?"

"I'm up for it," Sam nodded. "But Carls, let's be honest, you could sit out in the sun all day and not get any tanner."

"Thanks," Carly laughed.

"I'd be down for a day at the beach," Freddie nodded. "Waves, sand…Sam in a bikini…"

"And what if I don't wear a bikini?" Sam asked him playfully.

"Then it's basically just a trip to a place with a pile of gross, burning hot sand and disgusting salt water," Freddie said.

"Aw, you guys are adorable," Carly grinned. She turned to her brother. "You want to drive us?"

"Yeah, sure, I could practice my surfing," he nodded.

"Since when do you surf?" Sam asked, amused.

"Since I met this girl at the surf store in the mall while I was buying a bathing suit," Spencer replied.

"So you lied to her?" Carly asked.

"Excuse me, but you did not see how hot she was," Spencer said. "I would've told her I was the president of the United Kingdom."

"Actually, the UK doesn't have a democracy," Freddie pointed out. "So they would've have a president."

"Well _thank you_ so much for that," Spencer snapped.

"Whatever, let's just go get changed," Carly laughed. "The sooner we get out of the apartment, the better."

…

"Alright, I've scoped out three hot boys," Carly said to Sam as the four began to lay out their beach towels. Or rather, Carly, Sam and Freddie began to lay out their towels; Spencer had thrown down his stuff in a messy pile and darted straight for the ocean with his surfboard.

"Nice, what are their ratings?" Sam asked.

"I'm putting them at a 54, 72, and 90," Carly said.

"A 90?" Sam exclaimed. "We've never seen someone over an 82! Where is he?"

"Right there, the guy in the blue and white bathing suit!"

"You _rate_ guys?" Freddie frowned.

"It's actually a very effective system," Carly said. "See over the years, Sam and I have perfected a fool-proof scale."

"There's ten 10-point categories," Sam explained. "Hair, eyes, body-"

"Okay, okay, I got it," Freddie nodded. "You know, if a guy started handing out ratings to girls, he would be considered the biggest jerk in history."

"Well, yeah," Carly said. "I mean what kind of guy would do that?"

"It's totally insulting," Sam agreed.

"That's so- never mind," Freddie sighed.

"Okay, I think I'll start at the 54," Carly said, pulling off her sundress to reveal her pink and white striped bikini. "Then I'll work my way over to the 90."

"Have fun," Sam told her, sitting down on her towel next to Freddie.

"Hey, what am I?" Freddie asked Sam.

"What?"

"You know, what's my rating?"

"You don't have one," Sam smirked.

"What do you mean I don't have one? You'll rate total strangers but you won't rate your own boyfriend."

"That's right," she grinned. "Besides, it wouldn't work; the scale doesn't go down to the negatives."

"Oh ha, ha," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Relax, I'm kidding," Sam told him, standing up. "You wouldn't get a negative rating…probably. Now come on, let's go into the ocean."

She pulled off her tank top and shorts, showing her dark blue bikini.

"Wow," Freddie said, staring at her.

"I'll take that as a compliment?" Sam said.

"Definitely," Freddie nodded. "You look so…wow."

"You need to learn some better adjectives, nub," Sam laughed. "Now come on, I want to swim!"

"Okay, I'm coming," Freddie said, standing up. He pulled off his own shirt.

Now it was Sam's turn to stare. She had enough trouble not staring at Freddie's large muscles when he wore short-sleeved shirts, now that he was completely shirtless…it was all she could do to stop herself from running over to him and run her fingers all over his muscles.

"Impressed?" Freddie asked, grinning as he noticed Sam staring.

"You had a bug on you," Sam said quickly.

"Uh-huh," he smiled knowingly. "Come on, let's go to ocean."

The couple ran into the ocean, stopping when they were about waist deep.

"Don't you feel refreshed?" Freddie asked, feeling the cool water wash over his hot skin. "After spending all day dealing with broken air conditioners and insane temperatures?"

"Yeah, I do," Sam nodded. "And you know what, baby? I bet this will help you even more."

She pushed down on Freddie's shoulder's dunking her boyfriend's head in the water.

"Sam!" Freddie exclaimed, coming up dripping wet and sputtering. "What was that for?"

"My amusement," she grinned.

"Yeah? Well, this is for mine," Freddie said, dunking Sam.

"You're dead!" Sam said loudly when she came up.

"Am I?" Freddie asked, cocking his head to the side playfully.

"Uh-huh, you are," Sam nodded. "After this."

She wrapped her arms around his neck and put her lips on his. Freddie eagerly responded by pulling her closer and deepening the kiss.

"Hey!"

The couple broke apart and Saw Spencer, paddling behind them on his surfboard.

"What?" Freddie asked, slightly annoyed that he had been interrupted so soon in this make-out session.

"This is a _public beach_!" Spencer exclaimed. "Not some romantic teeny bop movie; keep you saliva to yourself! There are _children_ here!"

"So we're not allowed to kiss, but you can sit out here shirtless?" Sam asked. "I mean, if I were a little kid, I'd be more scared by that than seeing Fredork and I kissing."

"Well!" Spencer huffed as he paddled away.

"I'm hungry," Sam said as they watched Spencer attempt to standup on his surfboard (though he wound up flat in the water about five seconds later). "Let's go to the snack stand."

"We just got in," Freddie pointed out.

"And now I want a snow cone," Sam said. "Come on."

Freddie, shaking his head smiling as Sam pulled him out, stopped off at his towel to grab his wallet and then followed Sam to the snack stand.

"Alright, I'll buy you a snow cone," Freddie said, pulling out a few bills from his wallet.

"_A _snow cone?" Sam frowned.

"How about a snow cone in every flavor then?" Freddie chuckled.

"There you go," Sam said happily.

Freddie purchased the snow cones (totaling to fourteen) and the couple carried them back to their towels. Carly was still busy flirting and Spencer had abandoned his surfboarding attempts and was now busying himself by working on a sandcastle.

"How are they?" Freddie asked as Sam licked the red and blue snow cones.

"Amazing," Sam said, slurping the syrup out of the purple one now. "You want some?"

"Am I hearing that correctly?" Freddie laughed. "Is Sam Puckett offering to share _food_ with me?"

"Well I guess if you don't want any," Sam shrugged. "I'll eat them all myself…"

"I'm kidding, give me a lick," Freddie said, leaning over to take a lick of the green snow cone Sam was now starting.

"How is it?"

"Pretty good," Freddie nodded. "A little high in sugar though, don't you think?"

"Aw baby, your mom really has corrupted your mind," Sam said. She laid back on her towel, still slurping up her snow cones.

"Ready to head back to the ocean?" Freddie asked.

"Nah, I've got to work on my tan. Besides, I don't have enough energy to walk all the way back there."

"Fine, but if you're going to just sit out in the sun, you really should but some sunscreen on," he told her, pulling out a bottle from his bag.

"You nub, that would just make sure I _don't_ get a tan," Sam scoffed.

"You're going to get burnt then," Freddie warned her.

"No I won't," Sam said lazily, closing her eyes.

"Yeah you will," Freddie persisted. "You're face is already getting a little red. And you know, in this heat, you could get sunburned so badly it could be classified as a second-degree burn. And that can lead to early wrinkles, increased risk for skin cancer, not to mention all of the gross peeling you'll be going through in a few days, and-"

"Okay, give it to me!" Sam exclaimed, grabbing the sunscreen from Freddie. "It's worth slopping this stuff on just to get you to shut up."

"Thank you, Princess," Freddie said, satisfied.

Already wearing a layer of sunscreen, he laid back on his towel as well. "Think the air's working back home?"

"I hope so," Sam said, finishing applying the sunscreen and flopping herself back down. "You know how difficult it'll be to sleep if it's not?"

"I know," Freddie agreed. "But hey, think of the bright side; at least we got to have a nice beach day today."

"I guess," Sam mumbled sleepily. "Man, I need a nap."

"You were just going on about how hard it is to sleep in the heat!"

"That's at night in bed," Sam pointed out.

"Whatever you say," he laughed.

The couple lay silently for several minutes. Freddie assumed Sam had drifted off to sleep, so he absentmindedly played with the corner of his towel.

"You really want to know it?"

"What?" Freddie asked, turning to Sam, who was facing him.

"You really want to know your rating from that scale me and Carly have?"

"I thought you said I didn't have one," Freddie said.

"Carly made me give you one when I slept over a couple months ago," she admitted. "I made her swear never to repeat it, though. So you want to know it or not?"

"Yeah, sure," he nodded. "I think…I'm not _really_ negative, am I?"

"You think I'd have stuck around for this long if you were?" she grinned.

"Okay, so what is it then?" he asked.

"91."

"91…" he repeated thoughtfully. "Wow, that's a lot higher up than I thought."

"Well, all the food you've bought me helped you a lot," Sam told him.

"Knew there was a reason I was doing that," he chuckled. "Wait…so where do I lose those nine points?"

"Oh, I dunno," Sam shrugged. "You're kind of obsessive about things, plus you spend too much time talking about computers and chiz."

"Fair enough, I guess," he smiled.

Soon the sky began to darken and the crowded beach began to clear out.

"Well," Carly said, sitting down at the end of Sam's towel. "I talked to the 90."

"And?" Sam asked.

"I'm bringing him down to a 45."

"What? You cut his rating in half? Why?"

"Because the whole time I was talking to him he kept calling me Carla," she sighed. "Ordinarily, I would've been fine with that, seeing as how hot he was, but it turns out he's kind of a whimp. I mean, he was too afraid of sharks to go in the ocean, he wouldn't walk on the boardwalk because he didn't want to risk getting splinters, and he kept lecturing me on the dangers of seaweed. I did talk to the 54 a lot though, and I got his number. He's really great. I think he liked me!"

"Good work, kid," Sam smiled.

"We should probably be getting home now," Carly said. "Where's Spencer?"

"He's coming over now," Sam said, as Spencer, very sandy from constructing his sand castle all afternoon approached the teens.

"What happened to surfing?" Carly asked her brother as everyone began to gather up their belongings.

"Surfing shmurfing," Spencer said. "Did you see that sand castle I made? It's got two bedrooms and a moat!"

"You probably should've built it further from the tide," Freddie said. "It's getting washed away right now."

"What do you-No!" Spencer cried.

"Come on," Sam said, shaking her head in. "Let's go."

"So," Carly said as they walked back to the car, Spencer still whimpering over his sand castle. "What did you two do this afternoon?"

"Oh you know, swam, ate, sat in the sun," Freddie replied. "And I found out my rating."

"Really, you told him?" Carly asked Sam.

"Yeah," she nodded.

"I told you it was no big deal," Carly smiled. "So you gave your boyfriend a perfect rating, so what? If I had a boyfriend I would've given him the same."

"Carly!" Sam exclaimed.

"What?"

"A perfect rating?" Freddie repeated, grinning cockily.

"Thanks a lot, Carls," Sam mumbled.

"Well how was I supposed to know you told him a fake rating?" she frowned. She pulled out her phone. "I'm going to text Mr.54…"

"So I'm a 100?" Freddie asked, still smiling.

"It's only because I'd look bad dating anything less," Sam said, her cheeks flushing red.. "Don't flatter yourself."


	146. Chapter 146

**AN- This oneshot takes place during irestaurant.**

…**..**

_Research_

You'd have thought after six months, six long, grueling months, he would've finally gotten over it. That he'd have been able to accept that he had made a mistake and move on.

But he couldn't.

Every day since that day in the elevator, where he had let end perhaps the greatest chapter in his life, he had been kicking himself for not turning to Sam as she turned to head home when their phones beeped midnight, ending their last make-out session and telling her to stay. For sitting there silently as she mumbled a goodbye before climbing back into the apartment from the fire escape where they had gone to live out the last moments of their relationship.

Why didn't he stop her? He had wanted to, with every waking fiber of his body. But he didn't, and he had been living with that regret every day since.

There had to be a way to fix it, Freddie thought miserably, watching the blonde-headed girl dance around with Carly as he filmed them for the web show.

_I want her back_. That thought kept bouncing around in his skull. But would Sam even _want_ to get back together with him? Well, they _did _say that maybe they'd try the relationship again some day, when he became more abnormal and she became more normal, but truth be told, Freddie didn't want Sam to become more normal. She wouldn't be Sam then. And then, of course, assuming that he _did_ manage to find the courage to approach Sam about this, what would he even say? Just a casual, "So you want to get back together?" No. He knew that wouldn't cut it. It had to be something special to even give him a chance…but what?

"Hey, did I miss my part with the meat sauce yet?" Gibby asked, tapping his shoulder as the girls continued to dance.

"Um, no, that's not for a few minutes," Freddie told him, snapping out of his thoughts. "Why don't you-" He stopped and stared at him. Gibby. Gibby had some…gift with girls that neither him nor Spencer could understand. It was a crazy thought, but maybe he could help him.

"Hey, guys, why don't we take a break?" Freddie called to the girls.

"But I thought you wanted to get this bit edited today," Carly pointed out.

"Eh, there's always tomorrow," Freddie shrugged. "Hey Gib, could I talk to you out here for a minute?"

Not giving the boy a chance to respond, Freddie pulled Gibby out into the hallway.

"Ow!" Gibby said indignantly as Freddie shut the door behind them. "My arm was already sore from my archery lesson!"

"Sorry," he said quickly. "Look, I need some…advice."

"Did that rash come back?"

"No! It's just, well, it's a girl problem." Freddie explained.

"Oh, I see," Gibby nodded. "What kind of girl problem? Is one following you? Trying to sell you a monkey?"

"Um, it's actually a more…romantic problem," Freddie frowned. "If I tell you something right now, I need you to swear to me it will never leave your lips."

"Sure," he said.

"You need to swear it on the Stone of Algia," Freddie said seriously.

Gibby's eyes widened. "Dude, I'm not sure I'm comfortable with that."

"It's really important," Freddie told him.

"I…okay," Gibby sighed. "Wow, this must be some serious chiz."

"Yeah, it is," Freddie nodded. "You see, the thing is…I want to get back together with Sam."

"Puckett?"

"No Gibby, the other Sam I dated," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Yes her!"

"But I thought she dumped you and broke your nerdy little heart."

"I just let her say that's what happened," Freddie told him. "The truth is it was mutual."

"Well that was stupid of you," Gibby said.

"Yeah, I know," Freddie sighed. "So do you think you could help me? I mean, you seem to understand the workings of the female mind pretty well."

"It's a gift," Gibby said happily. "Okay, so if you want to get back together with Sam, you need to do something crazy. Chicks love that; the crazier the better. How do you feel about Japanese fireworks?"

"I can't do anything illegal, Gib," Freddie said. "I'll wind up in prison and then I'll have to wait years to get her back."

"Fine, but you're making this difficult," Gibby said. He thought for a moment. "Okay, I got it. You go on iCarly…"

"Uh-huh," Freddie nodded. "And?"

"You sing her a love song."

"A love song? Gibby! I can't do that! I can't sing!"

"That has nothing to do with it," Gibby told him. "I told you, it has to be crazy. Did you listen to a word I said?"

"But I've never written a love song before," Freddie said.

"It's not algebra! Just through some words together that rhyme!" Gibby exclaimed.

"Well…I guess that might work," Freddie said slowly.

That night, Freddie stayed up into the night, researching famous love poems on the Internet; he wanted to make sure his love song didn't turn out to be a total pile of garbage. Now while Freddie always got A's in his English classes, he knew he was nowhere near skilled enough to pull of something of Shakespeare's level.

_I just have to make her like it_, Freddie told himself. _So I'll just make sure I talk about things she likes in it. Oh, and I obviously have to put in there how beautiful I think she is…but then where do I talk about her kisses? And then how am I supposed to find a rhythm to sing all of this to on iCarly? _

By the end of the week, though, he had found that he had actually made pretty good progress in this endeavor. He had written two verses and he had put together a nice audio mix to play in the background while he sang it. He just needed a strong ending verse and he would have it.

He leaned against his locker, trying to act casual as he chatted with Carly, but still racking his brain for the right lyric.

_I need something powerful…something direct, yet sort of heartfelt…_

He absentmindedly followed Carly, still deep in his thoughts.

_I want you to be mine again…I can't live without you…No, those are all stupid. I need something better…_

"Is it too late for you to love me?" _Yes, that's perfect! I can put that right before-Oh crab, I said that out loud, didn't I?_

"What?" Carly frowned.

"Nothing," he said quickly.

"Did-Did you just say-"

"No." _Oh no, Carly's not going to drop this. Okay, just keep acting natural. Maybe she'll think she misheard me or something…Oh thank God, here's Sam. Hopefully she'll distract Carly. _

Sam led them all down to the basement, saying something about Gibby and a basement, but all Freddie could focus on was finishing his love song as soon as possible so he could sing it on iCarly before Carly got a chance to tell Sam what he had just let slip.

While Gibby was talking about his dream of opening his own restaurant, Freddie looked around. It was actually a nice place…real secluded, especially with that concrete ceiling. If Gibby actually _did_ follow through with this dream, and his own plan of winning Sam back with that song of his worked, then this might be a great place for them to go on their first date. It would just be them, and maybe he could even convince Gibby to cook some Italian food for them, just like Sam liked. He could bring in some candles and some nice music, maybe even a-

"Will you tell this boy he can't open a restaurant in our school?" Carly said to Freddie.

Well, maybe it _was_ a little far fetched, Freddie told himself. "Gib," he began. "You can't-"

_Oh, what the hay. Gibby's right. I have to do something completely crazy to get Sam back, and I sure as heck would have to take her on a crazy first date if the plan worked. So why not take her to a one-of-a-kind school basement restaurant? She seems to really like the idea. _

"Would there be lasagna?" he asked.

"Heck yeah there would," Gibby nodded.

Carly rolled her eyes. Freddie knew she was skeptical about the idea, but hey, she wasn't the one trying to win Sam back. After Carly headed upstairs, basically saying that they were crazy for believing in this idea, Freddie knew he would have to talk to her about that slip up earlier. It would only be a matter of hours, minutes, actually, for this _was_ the digital age, before Carly told Sam what he had said. Maybe if he could talk to her, tell her he was thinking of some movie he had seen last night and remembering a particular scene…yes, maybe that would work…

"All right, I'm gonna follow Carly up," he said to Sam as Gibby went back to the kitchen to inspect it further.

"Hey," Sam said as he was grabbing her bag.

He turned to her.

"You got a new little crush on her?"

_What? What the-Why would she-No! No! Not _her_! _Freddie thought frantically to himself. _Oh man, why would Sam think that? Okay, Benson, you've got to play this off. She can't think you still have a crush on Carly, otherwise she'll never take you back!_

"What? Pfft, no!" _Oh God, that did not sound convincing at all…I've got to bail before I make this any worse._

"Well go."

"Bye."

He ran up the steps, spotting Carly buying a can of Wahoo Punch from the vending machine.

"Um, hey, Carly," Freddie said, hurrying over to her.

"I thought you were going to help Gibby plan his little restaurant dream," Carly said, popping the cap to her beverage and taking a swig of it.

"Later," he said. "Um, listen, about what I said earlier…it's not what it sounds like."

"You mean the whole 'Is it too late for you to love me' thing?" Carly asked. "Because, look, Freddie, you're a great guy, but you're kind of like my brother, and dating you again would be sort of-"

"Yeah, I got that totally," Freddie nodded. "It was just thinking of some chick flick I saw on T.V. last night. I was just…trying to remember the last line. It was really bothering me, and that line clicked in my head and I just said it out loud."

"Oh, you must have seen _Dear Joe_!" Carly said. "I think the last line of his last letter went something like that."

"Yeah, sure," Freddie said quickly. "Hey, um, you and Sam haven't found anything to go between our new Super Bra clip and the thing where Sam and Gibby throw syrup onto that old lady for this week's iCarly, have you?"

"No, why?"

"I was wondering if I could maybe do something on the show."

"What?" she frowned.

"Um, I was hoping I could keep it a secret."

"It's not another robot thing is it?" she asked. "Because I saw that Fredbot thing while I was with my granddad and it was-"

"No, no robots," Freddie told her. "It's just…something I really have to do."

"Well, okay," Carly nodded.

…..

At last, the day Freddie had been waiting for arrived.

"I'm gonna do it," he told Gibby softly while they were in the studio, getting ready for the show.

"Do what?" Gibby frowned.

"Sing my love song to Sam," Freddie told him. "Remember, you said it would be a good way to show her that I want her back as my girlfriend?"

"Oh yeah, I actually saw that in a movie, you know," he said. "The girl ended up laughing at the guy and wound up with his brother."

"Dude! Why'd you tell me to do it then!" Freddie hissed.

"Relax, it's not like you have a brother or anything," Gibby told him.

Freddie groaned. Well, it was too late to back out now. He would just have to hope for the best.

Freddie barely paid attention throughout the web show. When the clip of Super Bra tying up Spencer for trying to rob a produce store and helping Sam and Carly win their hopscotch championship ended, Carly turned to the camera.

"Alright, and now our favorite tech producer, Freddie, will take the floor," she said.

"We have no idea what he's doing," Sam said. "So we apologize in advance."

Carly took the camera from Freddie and Sam tossed him her remote.

"Um, hello," Freddie said nervously to the camera. "Er, I-I know you usually don't see too much of me on this side of the camera, but, um, well, there's something important I have to do."

Carly and Sam exchanged confused looks but said nothing.

"As I'm sure you've all heard by now," Freddie said, taking a folded sheet of paper out of his pocket. "Sam and I broke up about six months ago. And well, there's been something I've wanted to say to her ever since, but I've never really been able to tell her. So, um, I'm-I'm going to sing it to her."

He quickly pressed a button on Sam's remote and the studio filled with music. Carly gasped, a grin spreading over her face, and Sam had an unreadable expression on hers. Hands trembling, Freddie unfolded the paper and began to sing, to the best of his ability, which unfortunately was not very good.

"_When we were together, _

_it made everything better._

_But when we fell apart,_

_It broke my heart." _

"Oh my God!" Carly squealed, looking over at Sam from behind the camera. "Do you _realize _what's happening here?"

Sam didn't say anything, she just continued to stare at Freddie.

"_Still staring at you, Sam,_

_the way you look at ham. _

_I've missed you for so long,_

_Which is why I wrote this song."_

"Sam!" Carly whispered. "He wants to get back together with you! He's serenading you with a love song!"

"Yeah, I've realized that," Sam whispered back.

"So, do something!" Carly hissed back to her. "Don't just stand here for the love of salami!"

"_I need to know desperately,_

_Is it too late for you to love me?_

_I want to-"_

"Um, yeah, stop the music," Sam said, stepping out from behind the camera.

Freddie quickly pressed the button on Sam's remote and the music faded out. He looked at her, so many feelings rushing through him. What was she going to do? Was she going to laugh at him in front of everyone? Was she going to make fun of the song? What was she doing?

The two stared at each other for several minutes, Carly and Gibby not making a noise as they watched the scene intently.

And then, the corners of Sam's lips turned up into a small smile, and she stepped closer to him.

"Only you," she said in a voice so that only he could hear her. "Would sit there and write some cheesy love song and sing it live in front of millions of viewers. Did you fall out of some lovesick romance drama?"

Freddie swallowed nervously. _Here it comes_, he thought anxiously. _She's going to laugh in my face._

"If I had seen any other guy do that," Sam continued softly. "I would've thrown something at him and called him a loser. But," she stepped even closer to him, so that there was barely any space between them. "You actually managed to pull that off, Fredward."

Freddie opened his mouth. "So-So does that mean…do you want to…"

Sam grinned and pressed her lips to his.

Behind them, Carly let out a high-pitched girly scream, dropping the camera as she began to clap happily.

"Well," Sam said once her and Freddie pulled away. "I guess since you still kiss pretty well, I can deal with having you around as my boyfriend again."

Freddie laughed. "So, did you like the song?"

"Just don't go giving up your tech jobs to try and land a record deal," Sam told him. "But I've got to say, the song wasn't half bad."

"You guys, this is so great!" Carly exclaimed, running over to the couple and jumping up and down, looking as though Christmas had come in July. "I feel like the happiest girl in the world right now!"

"But no one sang a love song to _you_," Gibby pointed out.

"Yes, thank you, Gibby," Carly snapped. She turned back to her best friends. "Freddie, that was the sweetest thing I've ever seen in my life! Can I please buy the rights to this story so I can make it a huge movie? All of the love stories out there now seem so lame! Oh, and I'm sorry I dropped your camera."

"It's fine," Freddie shrugged.

"You spent three hours polishing that thing last week," Sam said.

"Yeah, well," Freddie grinned. "I've got more important things in my life now."


	147. Chapter 147

**AN- This oneshot is a sequel to chapter 142, where Sam and Freddie were on their road trip. **

…

_Draw_

"Sam, I'm telling you, we're not going the right way," Freddie said as he drove through the night.

"Quiet, I'm sleeping," Sam mumbled, resting her head on the window.

"We were supposed to be on highway eight by now," Freddie said. "It was going to take us all the way through Indiana."

"You're going the right way, you're just taking a faster route than that highway," she yawned. "Now can you shut up so I can sleep?"

"You're the one who threw my directions out the window," Freddie said. "If we're going to be lost, Sam, you're going to be awake for it."

"For the millionth time, we're not lost," Sam groaned. "Believe it or not, there _is_ more than one way to get to North Carolina."

"I don't even know what state we're in," Freddie sighed.

"We're almost in Ohio," Sam told him.

"How could you possibly know that? We haven't passed any road signs for the past twenty four hours!"

"Most of the cars we passed have Ohio license plates," Sam said simply.

"That-that could mean anything," Freddie mumbled.

"Just keep taking this road," Sam told him, leaning back against the window to go to sleep.

"Wait…stay up."

"Why?" she moaned.

"Because it's too quiet when you're sleeping," he said.

"I'll snore then."

"Please Sam, for me?" he pleaded.

"Ugh, fine," Sam said, sitting up. "But that means I'm sleeping for twelve hours when we get to our hotel, so don't blame me if we don't get to go to your little vintage carton parade."

"Deal," Freddie nodded.

"Good. Now where are those fladoodles?"

"I think you finished them," Freddie told her. "And we only brought the one bag."

"You're kidding me."

"Here, have some trail mix," Freddie said, offering her the snack bag he had been nibbling from for the past hour.

"I'd rather let my stomach eat itself from hunger than put that in my mouth," Sam said.

"Okay, but if you change your mind, the bag's right here," Freddie said.

"Trust me, I won't," she said firmly. "Alright, Benson, you got me to stay up. Do something."

"We can just talk," Freddie said. "You excited to get to North Carolina?"

"I still can't believe you picked North Carolina of all places," Sam said. "There's nothing there, well other than that lame little parade of yours. We could've gone to some place with theme parks or a huge concert."

"Come on, we're not kids any more," Freddie said. "Don't you think we're a little old for stuff like that?"

"No," she said. "We're not in college _yet_, Fredbag. Besides, those things aren't just for kids."

"North Carolina will be fun," Freddie told her. "They have beautiful scenery, nice lakes, and the hotel actually has-"

"Aren't you scared?" Sam blurted out.

"Scared?" Freddie frowned. "Of North Carolina? Well, I mean sure, they have some bad snow storms in the winter, but in the summer we should be-"

"No, not of North Carolina," Sam said. "Of college! It's like you said, we're not kids anymore. We graduated high school; we're on our own."

"Wait, I thought you were excited to go to that dance academy in the Fall," Freddie pointed out. "You said you've always wanted to go to New York."

"But what if I mess up?" Sam asked. "I mean, you'll be fine; MIT would be crazy if they ever threw you out, but aren't you scared just a little bit of the whole idea?"

"First of all, you're not going to mess up," Freddie told her. "I've seen you dance; that school will be keeping you around for a _long _time. And second, yeah, I _am_ sort of scared about MIT, and lately I have been worrying about whether or not I'm going to be able to handle being all by myself and if I'm going to be able to keep up with all the classes. But you know, you were right about us not being there yet, Sam."

"Turn right."

"What?"

"Turn right; we have to get onto that road if you want to keep heading in the right direction."

"I still say we're lost," Freddie mumbled, but listening to his girlfriend anyway. "But back to what I was saying; you're going to be fine in the fall, Sam. But for know, why don't we just push it college and growing up out of our minds for right now; that's why we took this trip, isn't it?"

"I thought it was to annoy your mom," Sam smirked.

"Yeah, well, that's an added bonus," Freddie chuckled.

"I'm just glad she finally stopped calling us every five minutes," Sam said. "Okay, just keep on this road for the rest of the trip and we'll be in North Carolina early tomorrow."

"Sam, please just let me pull over at one of the service plazas and ask for directions," he said. "Or at least let me just go in and get a map."

"You want a map? I'll get you a map." She reached down into her bag and pulled out a pad of paper and a pencil.

"What are you doing, Puckett?"

"Drawing you a map," Sam said. "So that way you'll stop whining and we'll get there faster. Here you go."

She handed Freddie her map.

"Is this supposed to be the United States?" Freddie asked.

"Yup."

"Sam," Freddie sighed. "Alaska's not connected to California."

"Oh…well that doesn't matter, we're not going that way," Sam shrugged.

"And Georgia's not next to Pennsylvania! And Missouri's not-"

"Look, I know where we're going," Sam said. "If you want to switch places and have me drive the rest of the way-"

"No, no, I'll drive," Freddie said. "But our next road trip I'm putting the directions on my phone so you can't throw them out the window."

"Who says I won't through your phone out the window?"

"Good point."

"And anyway, once you see that we got to lame North Carolina with _my _directions, you'll never doubt me again," Sam said.

"You really think North Carolina's going to be lame?" Freddie asked.

"Well, maybe if I had gone with someone else," Sam grinned. "But let's face it. You and I won't get _too _board there."

"And why's that?" Freddie laughed.

"We can find…_ways_ to entertain ourselves."

"Can't wait," he smiled.

"It's a good thing we talked Carly out of tagging along with us," Sam yawned.

"I know," he nodded. "Hey, you're really tired, aren't you?"

"Sort of," she admitted.

"Go to sleep then."

"I thought you didn't want to be lonely," she said.

"Eh, I'll be fine, just rest, baby," he told her.

"Okay, but just keep heading East," Sam said, closing her eyes.

"I don't think we should be heading-"

"Just do it!"

"Alright," he sighed.

So Freddie drove in silence through the night, taking the occasional look at a sleeping Sam. At around ten the next morning she opened her eyes.

"I think we're almost there," she commented, looking out the window.

"Where? To the middle of nowhere?" Freddie asked. "We have to stop and get gas soon, Sam, and I really think we should just ask for directions."

"Aren't guys not supposed to want to do that? Besides, I know where we are."

"How? You've never been here before." He pulled into a gas station on the side of the road.

"Mama knows how to navigate."

"This is crazy," Freddie said as him and Sam got out of the car. "I'm going to go inside and ask whoever's there if we can-"

"What was the name of the hotel we're staying at?" Sam asked.

"Lighthouse Point, why?" Freddie asked.

Sam smirked and pointed to a tall building in the nearby distance with the name Lighthouse Point written across the top in fancy lettering.

"I-well, we-those places are all over the country," Freddie sputtered. "For all we know we wound up in Florida or New York."

"Hey, dude," Sam said to an old man who had just stepped out of the car at the pump next to them. "What state is this?"

"North Carolina," he replied promptly. "Best state in the whole dang U.S."

Sam turned to her husband. "Hmm, so it looks like this _isn't_ Florida."

"How-how did you manage to get us to North Carolina all the way from Seattle with no map or any sort of directions?" Freddie asked.

"I told you, Mama knows how to navigate," she said. She looked back at the hotel. "Hey, what's that tall blue thing behind the hotel?"

"Well, that," Freddie said, smiling. "Is the tallest water slide in the state. I forgot to tell you; the hotel has a huge water park in it."

"Baby! This totally makes North Carolina awesome! Hurry up, let's go!" Sam exclaimed.

"But…my vintage cartoon parade starts in like forty minutes," Freddie said. "And you _did _sleep in the car…"

"Ugh, okay," Sam moaned. "But when we _do _go to the water park, don't be surprised if someone pushes you down that slide..."


	148. Chapter 148

**AN- This chapter is a follow up to ch144, Backing, where Sam and Freddie were getting ready to move to Chicago. Again, thanks for all the requests, keep them coming, and I'll upload them in the order they're sent.**

…**.**

_Iron_

"Well, I have to ask this one more time," Carly said as her, Sam and Freddie stopped in front of Spencer's apartment. "Are you guys _sure_ you have to move?"

"Carly, you know the answer to that," Sam smiled.

"It was worth a shot," Carly sighed. "Alright, Spencer's probably waiting for us."

They opened the apartment door and stepped inside. Spencer was at the stove, preparing a large batch of spaghetti tacos, and T-Bo and Gibby were in the middle of a game of _Zombie Mayhem III: Revenge of the Undead_, but when they caught sight of Sam and Freddie, everyone stopped what they were doing.

"Oh man, I promised myself I wasn't going to cry," Spencer sniffed. "I can't believe this is the last time you two will be walking through that door!"

"Dude, we'll visit," Sam told him.

"And who am I going to get manicures with?" Gibby asked. "Freddie was the only one who understood my theory on buffing!"

"I thought we weren't going to discuss that with anybody," Freddie mumbled.

"And who the heck's going to buy all of my spicy bean smoothies?" T-Bo asked. "Sam's the only person who buys them!"

"You know, I heard the winters in Chicago are just brutal-" Spencer started.

"Don't waste your time; I've already tried everything," Carly told her brother. "They're really moving."

"Guys, come on, we're sad too," Freddie said. "You're not the only ones losing friends."

"Yeah, we're probably going to hate Chicago," Sam nodded. "We know Seattle's the best place in the world."

"Darn straight it is," Gibby said.

"Stupid Chicago," Carly mumbled. "With its deep dish pizzas and its Cubs football."

"Bears football," Sam corrected her.

"You already know their sports teams?" she exclaimed.

"Come on, let's eat," Spencer said. "And I sprung for the good taco shells just for the occasion, so no wasting!"

"No problem," Sam said.

"I doubt you guys have fancy food like this in Chicago," T-Bo said as everyone gathered around the table.

"Don't remind us," Sam muttered.

"Spaghetti tacos will be the number one thing we miss," Freddie said. "Well, other than you guys."

"Don't worry, I'll ship you some," Spencer said. "Or hey, I know! Maybe we could all take a road trip down there and visit you guys and we'll bring you some ourselves!"

"Shoosh yeah!" Gibby nodded happily. "We could sing show tunes the whole way!"

"You guys should definitely do that," Freddie said. He looked at Sam. "I mean, you guys will all need to come down eventually."

"Yeah," Sam smiled. "In about…nine months."

"Nine months?" Carly frowned. "Wait…you're not-?"

"Uh-huh," she grinned.

"Oh my God!" she screamed, jumping up out of her seat, running over to hug Sam and Freddie.

"Congratulations, you guys," Spencer said happily, joining in on the hug.

"Aw, look at me, you made me cry," T-Bo said, wiping a tear from his eyes.

"Wait, I'm confused, what's going on?" Gibby asked. "What's happening in nine months? Oh, you're all talking about the lemon parade? I didn't know it was in Chicago this year; that's awesome!"

"No, Gibby," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Sam's pregnant," Freddie told him.

"Seriously?" he said. "Like with a baby? That's even better than a lemon parade!"

"It'll actually be more like seven months that you'll have to come down," Sam said, once all the hugs were out of the way. "I'm almost two months along."

"That was one of the big factors in us moving," Freddie explained. "Other than those jobs we got offered. Out apartment's way too small for a baby, and there's practically no affordable houses on the market here."

"I'm so happy for you," Carly said. "I mean, yeah, I'm still super sad you're moving, but there's going to be a baby…and sure, I won't get to see it that much-"

"Carly, we've told you a million times, we're going to visit," Sam said. "You'll see the baby. And besides, you're going to be the godmother, so-"

"I am?"

"Dude, you're my best friend," Sam laughed. "Who else would we pick?"

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Carly squealed, pulling Sam into another hug. "I promise, I'll be the best godmother in the world. I'll spoil that kid rotten. Even when I don't see him or her, I'll send toys, and cute clothes, and when we are visiting, I'll baby sit for you guys. I'm going to need a _ton_ of pictures, though. I'm a godmother, can you believe that? Carly Shay: Godmother…how awesome does that sound?"

After everyone had as many spaghetti tacos as they could eat, Sam still holding her record at nine, Spencer began to clear the table.

"Alright, it's time for presents," he announced, closing the dishwasher. "To the couch, everyone!"

"Sweet, gifts," Sam said.

"You guys didn't have to get us anything," Freddie said.

"Too bad," Carly said. "We did."

"My present first, my present first!" T-Bo said, grabbing a tall, thin package and handing it to Sam and Freddie. "Go ahead, open it. It's a T-Bo original."

Sam tore the wrapping paper off the gift and lifted the lid of the box. "It's a…stick?"

"It's a food stick," T-Bo said proudly. "Specially designed to hold any food you want on it. Except for quesadillas…you don't want to try and put quesadillas on that thing."

"Wow, Teebs, this is awesome," Freddie said. "Thanks."

"Yeah, as soon as we get to Chicago, I'm loading this baby up with ribs," Sam said.

"Me next!" Gibby said, tossing Freddie and Sam a gift bag.

"It's…" Freddie said, pulling two button down plaid shirts out. "Wow, cool shirts."

"I got them specially made by my seamstress," Gibby said. "So you can wear them in Chicago and show off that famous Seattle fashion sense everyone talks about."

"Too bad I can only wear mine for a few more months before I start getting fat from the baby," Sam said. "Darn…but hey, I'll make sure Freddie wears his double for me."

"Take pictures, I'll put them on my blog," Gibby said happily.

"Sure thing," Freddie said, giving Sam a look.

"My turn!" Carly said, handing the couple a small package.

Freddie neatly unwrapped it to reveal a silver picture frame with a picture of him, Carly and Sam, laughing in their old iCarly studio.

"Whoa, Carly, this is…amazing," Freddie said softly, still looking at the picture.

"Hey, is Sam crying?" Spencer asked.

"No!" she snapped. "I'm just…shut up, it's hormones."

"I wanted to get you something to make sure you never forgot what good friends we are," Carly said.

"We won't forget that," Sam said.

"We'll hang this up right in the middle of our new living room," Freddie said.

"Yeah, so the first thing we'll see when we walk into the room will by Carly Shay," Sam chuckled.

"Alright people, we saved the best for last," Spencer said, placing a heavy box on the coffee table in front of Sam and Freddie. "Open it! Open it!"

Sam and Freddie tore the paper off.

"Er, what is it, exactly?" Sam asked, picking up the item, which was a blue circular object.

"It's a waffle iron!" Spencer said happily.

"Wait…" Freddie said, opening the iron up. "Those aren't _Galaxy Wars _waffle patterns are they?"

"Yup!" Spencer nodded. "I was thinking, what can I get Sam and Freddie that they'll both like? And then it hit me! Sam loves waffles, Freddie loves _Galaxy Wars_, why not let them have the best of both worlds? Obviously they don't sell _Galaxy Wars _waffle irons, so I had to make that myself."

Sam and Freddie exchanged looks. "You-You made it?"

"Relax, I've tested it out," Spencer laughed. "It doesn't set on fire."

"Cool," Sam grinned. "This is awesome, Spence."

"Yeah, I can spend the whole morning reenacting that big Proton Cruiser chase with my breakfast!" Freddie said excitedly.

"And I also have a box of my own special waffle mix for you that I just made today," Spencer said, walking over to the kitchen and grabbing a small box. "It's chocolate chip, so you can-Ah!"

The box had suddenly burst into flames. Spencer dropped it and Carly quickly snuffed the flames out with a blanket.

"How is that even possible?" Spencer exclaimed.

"Man, it's going to be weird not having things spontaneously combust," Sam said softly.

"I don't think I'll ever get used to it," Freddie agreed.

"Well, maybe you'll find a new friend who has some of Spencer's same crazy antics," Carly suggested.

"No chance," Sam sighed. "There's only one crazy, fire-hazard of a man out there."

"Just like there's only one delightfully awkward cat-loving guy, one smoothie guru and one slightly obsessive but still great friend," Freddie said.

"He called you awkward," Gibby chuckled at Carly.

"And there's only one meat loving, insanely tough blonde and one nerdy, tech-loving brunette out there," Carly said, ignoring Gibby's last comment. "You guys seriously have no idea how much we're going to miss you."

"Believe me Carly," Sam said. "We know exactly how you're feeling."

…

**AN- I've already gotten a request to write a story where Sam and Freddie are in Chicago, just so everyone knows. It should be up in a few chapters!**


	149. Chapter 149

_You_

"You know," Carly said, setting down a bowl of popcorn on the coffee table in front of Sam and Freddie. "I've got to say, since you two started dating, we've had a lot more room on this couch."

"Yeah, because they sit on top of each other practically, all smoochy faced," Spencer said from the kitchen.

"Can you just go put butter on the popcorn?" Sam asked, her head on Freddie's shoulder and his arms wrapped around her waist.

"No, gross, that makes it so unhealthy," Freddie cringed.

"There's _light_ butter on it," Carly said, sitting down next to the couple. "So everyone wins."

"Light butter?" Sam repeated. "Where do you come up with this chiz, Shay?"

"It's actually pretty good," Freddie said, taking a handful.

"Yeah, and if you think I'm kissing you after you eat that junk, you're crazy," she said.

"Please, like you could ten minutes without kissing," Freddie laughed.

"He's got a point," Carly smiled.

"Are we going to watch this movie or not?" Sam said, trying to hide the fact that her cheeks were turning red.

"Yup, _Dancing with Antelope _is in the DVD player and ready to play," Carly said brightly. "Spence, you coming?"

"Yeah, my friend Jill said this movie was amazing," Spencer said, taking a seat next to Carly. "She said the director uses the moon as almost a whole new character."

"Is this the Jill from your book/bake club?" she asked.

"You know, those women make my Mondays and Thursdays worth experiencing," Spencer shot. He turned to Sam and Freddie. "Hey, you two are a hot, young couple, aren't you?"

"Well half of us are," Sam said.

"Hey," Freddie frowned indignantly. "Sam, that's hurtful!"

"You know, I could've been talking about you," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Way to jump to conclusions, Fredpie."

"Please, now that's just inaccurate," Freddie grinned. "We all know you're the hot one in this couple."

"Aw, baby."

"Okay, before this turns into something I do _not_ want to see," Spencer said. "You guys want to do me a favor?"

"What is it?" Freddie asked.

"Well, you know that girl Gianna I was dating?"

"The one with the cat obsession?" Sam frowned. "Dude, she was gross. You're lucky she ran off with that pet store guy."

"I know, but she said she'd get us a discount at the guys store," Spencer shrugged.

"We don't have any pets though," Carly pointed out.

"Well…I might've-"

"You did _not _buy another goldfish!" Carly exclaimed.

"He'll live this time!"

"What's this favor you were talking about?" Freddie asked before Carly could retaliate.

"Well, I had rented a canoe for us to use this weekend at the lake, you know before we broke up, and I can't get my money back for it," Spencer said. "So I was wondering if you guys wanted to go instead? I'd hate for it to go to waste."

"Yeah, that sounds fun," Freddie nodded. "What do you think, Sam? You want to go?"

"I'm down," Sam said. "What time do we have to be there?"

"Six in the morning."

"Six in the-six in the morning?" she exclaimed, her eyes widening.

"I'll bring you bacon," Freddie told her.

"I'll be there."

…..

"I can't even see the sun," Sam mumbled as she walked towards the edge of the lake.

"Well, we can watch the sun rise together," Freddie told her, lugging the canoe behind him.

"You're such a girl," Sam said, shaking her head. "I can't believe you made me leave my pillows in the car."

"You can't sleep on a canoe, Sam."

"You can't sleep on a canoe," she mimicked.

"Grab a paddle," Freddie chuckled.

"You're the boy, shouldn't you be doing all the paddling?" she asked, picking up one of the paddles as Freddie began to push the canoe into the lake.

"Oh, so now I'm suddenly stronger than you?" Freddie said, amused.

"If it'll save me work, sure."

"Here, I'll help you in," Freddie said, holding out his hand for Sam.

"What a gentleman," Sam said, grinning as she took her boyfriend's hand and stepping into the canoe.

"Spencer said he rented the canoe for two hours," Freddie said, settling into the seat across from Sam. "So I'll set an alarm on my phone so we'll know when to head back."

"You know," Sam said, beginning to paddle. "I believe I was promised some bacon…"

"I was starting to think you forgot," Freddie smiled, pulling a plastic sandwich bag out of his backpack and tossing it to Sam.

"Mama never forgets her meat," Sam said, eagerly biting into a piece of bacon. "So what do we do in this canoe for two hours anyway?"

"Well what do you want to do?" Freddie asked.

"Hmm, we haven't made out in like, twelve hours," she said, raising an eyebrow.

"Baby, you know there is nothing more I'd like to do than make out with you," he told her. "But we have to keep our weight evenly distributed on each side of the canoe or we'll capsize."

"Ugh, so what _can_ we do without capsizing?"

"Talk."

"Yeah, you really _are_ like a girl," Sam said.

"Look, the sun's starting to come out," Freddie said, ignoring Sam's last comment. "Wow, doesn't it look amazing?"

"It _does_ look sort of nice," Sam admitted. "I've never been up early enough to see a sun rise."

"I've seen a few," Freddie said. "When my mom and I were going to those mother-son yoga classes."

"I heard they were supposed to be the most beautiful thing in the world," Sam whispered, using the soft tone she reserved only for Freddie. "I guess it's true."

"No it's not," Freddie said. "You want to know what the most beautiful thing in the world is?"

"What?"

"You."

Sam turned away, but Freddie knew she was blushing.

Suddenly overcome with a sudden urge, Freddie moved closer to her and pressed his lips to hers. She responded at once, and within a few seconds, they were caught up in yet another make-out session.

Then, the canoe gave a mighty lurch, and before either Sam or Freddie could react, the canoe flipped over and threw the couple into the water.

"Told you it would capsize," Freddie said, smiling.

"Eh, it was worth it," Sam laughed.

"Shoosh yeah it was.

**...**

**AN- Yeah, I know, the end was kind of fluffy, but hey, what's seddie without a little fluff now and then, right**


	150. Chapter 150

_Tidying _

"Spencer, for the millionth time, use a dang coster for your root beer!" Carly said loudly, frantically wiping off the ring of liquid from the counter.

"I used them all in my sculpture," Spencer said, taking his beverage from his little sister.

"What sculpture uses costers?" Carly frowned.

"I used them for the eyes of my ten-eyed zombie."

"Why are you going crazy cleaning?" Gibby asked from the sofa.

"Because," Carly replied, grabbing a disinfectant wipe and beginning to polish the door knob. "I have a super cute boy coming here for a date in one hour and this place has to be spotless or otherwise he won't kiss me and I'll be sad and Spencer! What is this paint stain doing on the door knob?"

"Oh that, I had green paint on my hands from my finger painting day last week and then I decided to go down to the convenience store and buy some strawberry milk," he explained.

"Are you_ trying _to make sure I never find true love?" Carly exclaimed. "I've spent all day tidying up the apartment, and now it's all useless because of your hand print malfunction!"

"You can give the boy the finger paint picture I made."

"No thanks," Carly sighed. "Look, you're going to Socko's house, right? Like, now?"

"I'm still not crazy about you being alone with this boy," Spencer said.

"Oh calm down, he's an honor student," Carly said.

"Really? Well alright then."

"Gibby, you've got to leave soon too," Carly said.

"But I have a pie in the oven!" he cried.

"I'll mail it to you," Carly said. "Come on, out you go."

"How come Sam and Freddie get to stay?" Gibby pouted.

"They don't," Carly said. She walked over to the foot of the stairs. "Puckett! Benson! Stop shoving your tongues down each other's throats and get down here!"

"I hope this boy knows what he's getting into," Spencer mumbled, massaging his ear, which Carly had accidentally screamed into as he was passing.

"What?" Sam asked as her and Freddie descended down the steps.

"You guys have been making out in the studio for like an hour," Carly said. "Don't your lips get tired?"

"We weren't making out," Freddie said. "Then what were you doing?" Carly asked, crossing her arms.

"Um, reading?" Sam said lamely.

"Reading what?"

"Um...the one with words?"

"Really?" Freddie said, rolling his eyes at his girlfriend. "You're a top-notch liar and _that's_ what you come up with?"

"I'm not good with book lies!" Sam defended.

"Then why did you say we were reading?"

"Well it's the only thing nerdy enough for you to be doing!"

"Guys, take the fight somewhere else," Carly cut in. "You need to leave."

"Why?" Freddie frowned.

"Because Chip's coming over!"

"That dude with nice calfs?" Sam asked.

"Yes, and I really like him, so get!" Carly said.

"Don't feel bad, we're all getting the boot," Gibby said resentfully, glaring at Carly. "And we don't even get to bring our pies."

"There's pie?" Sam asked. "Where? What kind?"

"No one's getting pie!" Carly said firmly. "You guys need to find somewhere else to hang out tonight."

"You know, _I _pay the rent here," Spencer said.

"No you don't, dad does," Carly pointed out.

"I pay half of it!"

"We can't leave, Carly, it's pouring out there," Freddie said, looking out the window as a loud clash of thunder sounded.

"Well can't you go across the hall you your place?" she asked desperately.

"My mom sprayed it for some Swedish virus and no one can go in it for twenty-four hours," he replied.

"Let's just grab an umbrella and head down to the smoothie," Sam said.

"I'm sorry to kick you out like this," Carly sighed. "But I just want to spend the night with Chip."

"Hey, I get it kid," Sam said. "That boy's got some _fine_ calfs."

"Why are you staring at this guy's calfs?" Freddie frowned.

"You jealous?" Sam grinned.

"Maybe."

"Relax, you have much bigger biceps than him," Sam assured him.

"That's better," Freddie said, satisfied.

"I'll drop you guys off at the Groovy Smoothie on my way to Socko's," Spencer said, grabbing an umbrella. "Come on, let's-"

There was another loud roll of thunder, and then the lights went out.

"Ah! This is exactly what happened in my dream last night!" Gibby screamed. "Everyone, be on the look out for elves!"

"What goes on in that demented little of head of yours?" Sam said through the darkness.

"I guess the storm took out the power," Spencer said. "Hang on, I'll go grab some flashlights."

"I think it took out the whole street's power," Freddie commented. "I don't see any lights on outside."

"Oh, this is just perfect," Carly moaned. "Why's everything happen on my date night?"

"Here you go," Spencer said, coming back and handing everyone a flash light. "I'll call the power company and see how long they think the lights will be out."

"Man, it's really coming down now," Freddie said, watching as the sky continued what seemed like buckets onto Seattle. "I haven't seen it rain so hard since-"

"No!" Carly exclaimed, looking down at her pearphone. "No, no, no!"

"What's wrong?" Sam asked, going to her best friend's side.

"Chip just texted me," Carly said. "He said his power went off too and his parents won't let him come over."

"Aw, well, you can reschedule, can't you?" Sam asked.

"I guess," she sighed. "I was just really looking forward to tonight. Maybe the power will come back on in a few minutes and we can still have out date."

"Bad news," Spencer said, hanging up his phone. "The power company said we probably won't have power until tomorrow afternoon."

"Tough luck," Sam said sympathetically to Carly.

"Well, at least I'll have more time to clean the apartment for our next date," Carly sighed. "_If_ he calls back to reschedule."

"Okay, I don't think any of you guys should be going out in this weather," Spencer said as a large streak of lightning flashed outside the window. "So how about you all spend the night here? Will your parents mind?"

"My mom's at work, and she's not allowed to use her cell phone there ever since she spent an entire hour texting me about some big chicken pox outbreak at the nursery school across from Ridgeway," Freddie said happily.

"Yeah, my mom usually just assumes I sleep here if I don't come home," Sam shrugged.

"Well my mom still hates you ever since you dated her," Gibby said.

"She looked like you!" Spencer exclaimed.

"Having a giant sleepover with everyone might be fun," Carly said, brightening up.

"Yeah, we could tell ghost stories and play truth or dare," Spencer said eagerly. "Or I know, we can make prank calls!"

"What is this, 1999?" Sam scoffed. "No one makes prank calls anymore, dude."

"They do too!"

"I'll go grab some pillows and blankets," Carly said. "Come help me, Sam."

"And I'll go get that mini grill from my closet," Spencer said. "We can roast marshmallows!"

"Er, maybe I should light the matches for that," Freddie said. "You don't have the best track record with fire."

"And I'll sit here and be Gibby," said Gibby, settling down on floor.

"That's the only thing you're good at," Sam shot at him.

"Manners, Puckett," Carly laughed. "Now come on!"

The girls headed up to Carly's room.

"I think this should be enough pillows," Carly said, tossing Sam several pillows from her bed and window seat. "Shoot. We only have four blankets though."

"That's cool, Fredbeans and I will share," Sam said, shifting the pillows in her arms.

"Aw, see, that's adorable," Carly smiled. "You can't wait to get all snuggly with your boyfriend during a huge storm."

"It'll be easier to steal his marshmallows if we're closer together," Sam said.

"Uh-huh, that's the reason," Carly said knowingly. "Now come on, let's get back downstairs. I don't like being up here with all the thunder."

The girls walked back into the living room, where Freddie had lit Spencer's tiny grill and Spencer was getting a large bag of marshmallows from the kitchen.

"I call thirty of those!" Sam said, settling down next to Freddie, throwing a blanket around both of them.

"Or we could spilt them among the five of us equally," Freddie suggested.

"I'm your girlfriend. I get half of your share then," Sam said.

"That's totally unfair!" Freddie exclaimed.

"You guys, there's more than enough for everyone," Carly said. She picked up the bag. "Let's see, there' s 100 in each bag apparently, everyone will get-"

"Oh, can I do it?" Gibby asked eagerly.

"Um, sure, go for it," Carly frowned.

"Twenty," Gibby said proudly.

The others simply looked at him.

"Um, yes Gibby, twenty," Carly finally said. "Way to divide there big fellow."

"There was a song on _Sunflower Block_ yesterday that helped me figure it out," he said, still beaming.

"Man, it's times like these when I wish I still had my giant lawn," Spencer said, sticking one of his marshmallows."

"It would be nice right now," Carly nodded.

Sam and Freddie exchanged confused glances. "What lawn?" Freddie asked.

"You know, the I spent seven hours making," Spencer said.

"Yeah, I know you guys saw it," Carly said. "How can you not remember it?"

"Are you sure?" Sam asked.

"Definitely," Carly nodded. "It was right around when you and Sam first starting dating for the first time."

"Still doesn't ring a bell," Freddie said.

"Well that's probably because they were so busy fighting and then making out to notice it," Spencer said.

"Oh God, that's right," Carly laughed. "That was back when they were calling me ten times a day to referee their fights. Luckily they're better now."

"Yeah, Sam takes all her anger out on me," Gibby said. "You know she glued my locker shut last week?"

"There's a special solvent that will get that right off," Freddie said, roasting a few of his marshmallows. "I'll give it to you Monday. She used to do it to me all the time."

"Thanks man."

"So who's up for some ghost stories?" Spencer asked.

"Oh, I know one," Sam said through her mouth of marshmallows. "It's about a guy who's in a this village and has to go to this old abandoned house and-"

"Not that one!" Spencer cried.

"What? Why not?" Sam frowned. "It's the best!"

"You told it to me last New Years and I couldn't sleep for a month!"

"Well if you're going to chicken out over everything, why did you want to tell ghost stories?" Sam asked, rolling her eyes.

"Not all ghost stories have to be scary," Spencer said.

"What ghost story isn't scary?" Gibby asked.

"You know, the one with the friendly ghost who helps children on Halloween," he replied. "Or the ones about the ghosts from _Galaxy Wars_ who help take down the evil androids."

"Those are technically not ghosts," Freddie said. "They're holomorphs. A ghost's plasma wouldn't be able to hold up in the atmosphere of-"

"So no ghost stories then," Carly said, cutting him off before an all out debate started between him and Spencer. "Let's move on to truth or dare."

"I hate that game," Sam moaned. "Ever since Leslie Morris's sleepover in sixth grade."

"What happened is sixth grade?" Freddie asked.

"Sam had dared Leslie to dip her slice of pizza in the toilet and then take a bite of it," Carly explained. "So when it was Sam's turn, to get even, Leslie made Sam-"

"Don't say it!" Sam hissed.

"Oh come on, it's funny," Carly laughed.

"Yeah?" Sam frowned narrowing her eyes. "Hey, Freddie, Gib, you wanna know what the goat did to Carly?"

"Okay, I'll shut up," Carly said quickly.

"Can I go first?" Gibby asked. "I've got a good one."

"Sure," Freddie nodded. "We'll go in a circle, so you ask Spencer."

"Okay, truth or dare?" Gibby asked Spencer.

"Um, truth."

"How tall are you?"

"How-what kind of question is that?" Spencer asked.

"I've always wanted to know," Gibby said. "I feel like your six feet, but a part of me's telling me you're stuck at five-eleven."

"I am not! I'm six-two!" Spencer said.

"Darn, I owe Guppy twenty bucks then," he sighed.

"Why are you betting with your little brother about Spencer's height?" Carly frowned.

"It helps our relationship, all right?"

"Whatever," Sam said, shaking her head. "Go Spencer, now you ask Freddie."

"Alright, young Freddie, truth or dare?"

"Um, truth."

"No, pick a dare," Spencer begged.

"But I don't want to-"

"Pick a dare!"

"Fine, dare," Freddie sighed.

"Yes!" Spencer cheered. He tossed Freddie his cell phone. "Make a prank call."

"Dude, nobody does that anymore!" Sam said.

"Seriously, people have found more sophisticated pranks now," Carly said.

"No way, prank calling is a classic," Spencer said firmly. He turned back to Freddie. "I've already got a number saved in there. Just hit send and then put it on speaker."

"If you insist," Freddie said, sending the number. The phone began to ring.

"Shhh, everyone, it's ringing!" Spencer said excitedly.

"You're the only one talking, dipthong," Sam said.

"Shhh!"

"Hello, thank you for calling Cheesy Chumps Play Palace," a voice on the other end of the phone picked up. "How can I help you?"

"Um, yes, um, I'm trapped in one of your play sets," Freddie said.

"What was that?" the voice said.

"Er, yeah, um, help me, I'm stuck in one of the tunnels and I can't get out," Freddie said.

"The Tunnel of Good Times?"

"Um, sure," Freddie said. "Help me down from here, I'm going crazy!"

"I'll be up there in a jiffy, little guy," the voice said. "Or my name isn't Steve Nichols!"

"Dude, that was hilarious!" Spencer burst out laughing the second Freddie hung up.

"Was it really?" Freddie asked. "You mean I was funny?"

"Yeah, baby, even for a prank call, that was pretty good," Sam said.

"Awesome!" Freddie grinned. He turned to his girlfriend. "Alright, Sam. Truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"Okay...oh, I've got it!" he said. "When we were at the Groovy Smoothie yesterday, were you the one who threw a corn dog at the girl who complimented my shirt?"

"I already told you," Sam groaned. "T-Bo slipped while he was carrying the stick of them and it hit her."

"Sam," Freddie said knowingly. "You can't lie in truth or dare."

"Yeah," Spencer said. "It's against the law!"

"Please, like we're supposed to believe you're six-two," Sam scoffed.

"Want me to get a ruler? I'll get a ruler!"

"Sam, look me in the eye and tell me you didn't throw that corn dog," Freddie said.

"Give me some of your marshmallows."

"What? Hey, Sam, paws off those are mine!" He grabbed the marshmallows Sam had taken from him and licked them. "Ha. Now they're _definitely _mine."

"Yeah, because I've never tasted your spit," Sam said, grabbing the marshmallows back and popping them in her mouth.

"Sam! I was going to eat those!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Then come and get them," Sam grinned.

"Don't do it, Freddie!" Gibby cried. "She's trying to distract you from your question with her girl lips!"

"Huh, yeah, you are!" Freddie, who had been leaning towards Sam, said.

"You can't get out of this that easily," Carly said. "Answer the question!"

"Carly!" Sam cried.

"Sorry," she mumbled. "I got caught up in the moment."

"So what's your final answer," Freddie asked Sam.

"Fine, I threw the corn dog!" Sam said loudly. "You happy?"

"Very," Freddie said, smiling.

"You assaulted a poor girl with meat because she made a comment about Freddie's shirt?" Carly asked. "Doesn't that seem a bit extreme?"

"No, Freddie's shirt was hideous," Sam said. "She was obviously complimenting _him_."

"Hey, my mom gave me that shirt for Christmas," Freddie said indignantly.

"And it should be burned right away," Sam said simply. "Alright, Shay. You're up. Truth or dare?"

"Oh, i guess I'm feeling a little risky," Carly smiled. "I'll take a dare."

"Good," Sam said happily. "I dare you to tell everyone what the goat did to you."


	151. Chapter 151

**AN- This oneshot actually isn't a request; it's something I've been wanting to write for awhile now. I hope you enjoy it, and I'll be back to posting requests next chapter!**

**...**

_Sudden_

"Carly, you've been obsessing about this all day," Sam said, holding her phone between her ear and her shoulder as she slid a ham out of the oven.

"Because it's a huge deal!" Carly said on the other end. "You know how snobbish Alyson Erikson is, and today she wears the same exact shirt at me and flaunts it in the lunchroom? Now I'm going to have to spend all night putting together an outfit tomorrow that will blow the socks off of anything she wears, and I still have to go to that PTA meeting."

"That's your fault for getting suckered into it," Sam said, stirring her potatoes on the stove. "I've never been to one of those meetings, and I never will."

"Yeah, how is that fair?" Carly asked. "I've only got one kid at the middle school, you've got two. _You_ should be going instead of me."

"Oh come on, they're twins, they count as one," Sam said. "Besides, I have you to tell me anything important, so why should I bother?"

"Can't you just come tonight?" Carly pleaded. "It's always so lonely."

"Couldn't even if I wanted to," Sam said. "I'm stuck taking Tyler to baseball practice since Freddie's going to be helping Jason with his science project all night."

Just then she heard the front door of the house open.

"That's Freddie," she said. "I'll see you at work tomorrow."

"Smells good, baby," Freddie said, walking into the kitchen, wrapping his arms around his wife's waist and planting a quick kiss on her lips.

"It's ham, it always smells good," Sam grinned, returning the kiss.

"Gross, get a room," Sam and Freddie's fifteen-year old son, Jason said, walking into the kitchen.

"I picked up the magnesium rods for your project on my way home," Freddie said, letting go of Sam. "Did you finish calculating the capacities of all the variables?"

"Yup, we're all set," Jason nodded. "I'm definitely going to win the science fair this year with this project."

"Look what you've done to him," Sam said darkly to Freddie.

"Oh awesome, ham," Jason said, picking off a piece of meat.

"You were saying?" Freddie chuckled to his wife.

"Just go set the table, nub," Sam said, shoving a pile of plates into his arms.

Freddie walked into the dining room, passing the living room where his other three children were sitting watching T.V.

"Hey, guys, dinner's ready," Freddie said to them. "Come sit."

"But this guy's about to dip his hand into a box of bees!" his eleven-year old daughter, Emma, exclaimed.

"You're mom has this on tape," Freddie said. "You can watch it later."

"Fine," she moped, clicking the television off.

Freddie set the plates down as Emma, her twin sister Ashton, seven-year old Tyler and Jason took their seats while Sam brought out the dinner.

"Hey mom," Tyler said as Sam cut some ham for his plate. "I told Bobby Stintson from baseball that you could knock any guy out with just a sock full of butter, but he didn't believe me. So can you show him tonight?"

"I wish," Sam said, sliding him his plate as the older kids began to help themselves. "But daddy won't let me bring my butter sock to public places anymore."

"Sam, you knocked out our waiter on our date last month," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"He got my order wrong! He had to learn!"

"Guess what happened at school today," Emma said, taking a bite of her ham. "Me and Clarissa were in History, and the teacher was being totally boring, as usual, so I took this spider that I had caught during lunch and-"

"I don't want to hear the end of this," Freddie interrupted.

"I do," Sam said. "Tell me after dinner, Em."

"Well _I _hacked into my French teacher's computer," Jason said. "You know, the one who gave me a C on my report because I insisted on turning it in digitally instead of printing it out on a hard copy like in the caveman ages. Anyway, I made her computer scream out that she was a Russian Spy for six hours."

"Using that new software I gave you?" Freddie asked.

"Uh-huh."

"Nice," Freddie grinned. "I mean, no! That's not nice! You're not supposed to use technology that way!"

"It's the only fun way," Sam mumbled.

"Sam..."

"Ashton, why aren't you eating?" Sam asked, looking at her daughter, who was just pushing her ham around on her plate. "You feeling okay?"

"Um, yeah," Ashton said. "I'm just not very hungry."

"I call her ham!" Emma yelled.

"I want it!" Tyler exclaimed.

"No way, I get it!" Jason said.

"Eat at least a little," Freddie said.

"Could I just eat the potatoes?" Ashton asked.

"Why don't you want ham?" Sam frowned. "It's just," Ashton started. "I was sort of thinking of...becoming a vegetarian."

Sam dropped her fork. "What?"

"No meat?" Emma cried. "Are you crazy?"

"Calm down, Emma," Freddie said. "Ash, why do you want to become a vegetarian all of the sudden?"

"It's because of your grandma's tofu lectures, isn't it?" Sam asked. She turned to Freddie. "Go call your mom and-"

"No, it's not because of that," Ashton said quickly. "It's because of this video we saw in school."

"You got this from _school_?" Sam said. "School? And everyone said that place was supposed to be good."

"What video?" Freddie asked.

"It was in health class," Ashton explained. "And it was showing how they make meat, and all the poor little animals just looked so sad. You saw it, Emma."

"No, I don't think I did," Emma said. "Health is my nap class."

"So-So now you-you want to become a-a-" Sam stuttered.

Ashton nodded. "I researched it on the Internet. There's a ton of meat substitutes I could eat and they're really cheap to buy."

Sam didn't say anything, she just continued to sit in her seat looking shocked.

"Um, Sam, can I talk to you in the kitchen?" Freddie asked, standing up.

"Why?"

"Just come on," Freddie said.

Sam reluctantly followed him.

"Okay, look," Freddie said. "I know this is kind of...sudden, but if Ashton wants to become a-"

"Don't say it!" Sam hissed.

"Sam, you're overreacting," Freddie said.

"Am I Freddie? Am I?" Sam snapped. "You're the one who flipped out when Tyler said he didn't get the point of _Galaxy Wars_. My daughter, my own flesh and blood wants to be a..._vegetarian_. Do you know what that means?"

"That she'll eat more salads?" Freddie shrugged. "I really don't see what the big deal is."

"The big deal?" Sam repeated. "The big deal is that there's going to be tofu touching my meat now, and when we go to Mr. Ribby's All-You-Can-Eat Rib Shack, we're going to look Mr. Ribby himself in the eye and say we want a rack of meatless ribs. And my dream of starting a competitive family hot dog eating team is dead."

"You just made up that last one," Freddie said.

"You know, I'm going to go to that PTA meeting Carly was trying to get me come to," Sam said. "And give them a piece of my mind. They can't corrupt the minds of children like that! This is America!"

"Sam, listen," Freddie said. "You love Ashton, right?"

"What? Yes, of course I do!"

"And you'd love even if she had some terrible disorder or a disability, right?"

"Yes, I would," Sam said. "But that's not the point! The point is-"

"And," Freddie continued. "You'd love her if she didn't want to eat meat anymore."

"I never said I wouldn't love her," Sam said. "Obviously I'd still love her as much as I always have, but..."

"But what then?" Freddie asked.

Sam crossed her arms and didn't reply.

"Sam, Ashton becoming a vegetarian isn't the end of the world," Freddie said softly. "In fact, like I said, it's _not a big deal_."

"But...it's meat," Sam whispered.

"I know," Freddie said. "And I know how much you love it. But you love Ashton more, right?"

Sam nodded.

"And hey," Freddie smiled. "Now you'll only have to split the meat five ways instead of six."

"That's true," Sam mumbled.

"Come on," Freddie said, kissing her. "Let's get back out there."

...

Later that night, Sam was sitting on the couch watching a program about a haunted house. Freddie was still helping Jason with his science project, so she was all by herself.

"Mom?"

Sam turned and saw Ashton standing behind the couch.

"Hey, it's almost midnight," Sam said, muting the show. "You're supposed to be in bed."

"Are you mad at me?"

Sam smiled. She patted the seat next to her. "Come here, Ash."

Ashton sat down next to her mother.

"First of all, I'm in no way mad at you," Sam said. "It's just...you kind of caught me off guard at dinner tonight. But you know me and meat, right?"

Ashton giggled and nodded.

"Listen sweetie," Sam said. "I'm sorry I made such a big deal about this whole thing. And if you want to be a vegetarian, then I'm fine with it."

"Really?" Ashton asked.

"Really," Sam said. "We'll just keep your tofu stuff away from the meat, deal?"

"Deal," her daughter agreed.

"And you're sure you want to give up meat?" Sam asked. "You know that means no more steaks, or burgers or those chicken wings you like."

"I'm sure," Ashton said.

"Well then do it. Anyway" Sam said, looking at her phone. "Now it's _really _late, and I have a hard enough time getting myself out of bed in the mornings, I don't want to have to worry about dragging you out of your bed tomorrow, so go sleep."

"Night mom," Ashton said, giving her mom a hug. "I love you."

"Love you too, Ash," Sam smiled, hugging her back.


	152. Chapter 152

_Awareness_

"Why are we stranding ourselves out here again?" Sam moaned as Spencer parked the RV in an empty spot in the woods. "With no electricity or phone service?"

"Oh my God, he's going to murder us!" Gibby exclaimed.

"I'm not murdering anyone," Spencer said. "We're here on a very important mission."

"Not the speech again," Freddie said.

"The public needs to be up-to-date on the beavcoon activity out here," Spencer said. "So we're here to promote awareness."

"Why does the public need to be aware of an imaginary creature?" Carly asked.

"It's not imaginary!" Spencer yelled. "Okay, here's what we're going to do. We're going to get a video of a beavcoon and post it on the Internet. Then everyone will _have _to believe it."

"Yeah, because there's no lies on the Internet," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Is there anything to eat? I'm starving."

"There's food in the blue bag," Spencer said. He looked out the RV window. "Okay, it's pretty dark now. I think we should-"

"Where's the blue bag?" Sam interrupted.

"Ask Gibby, he's the one who brought it," Spencer replied. "Anyway, like I was saying-"

"I didn't bring any blue bag," Gibby frowned.

"What? I told you to grab it when we were heading out the door this morning," Spencer said. "It had all our food for the weekend in it."

"You told me to grab the _true_ bag," Gibby said, pulling an empty, folded paper bag out of his pocket. "I though this was the realest bag you had in you apartment."

"Gibby!" Sam yelled, making a lunge for the boy. "We have no food!"

"Sam, don't kill him," Freddie said, grabbing his girlfriend's waist to keep her from attacking Gibby.

"Dude, we're all going to starve out here!" Sam said. "I know I'm your girlfriend and all, but baby, don't think I'm above eating you if I have to."

"Sam," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "There's no need to threaten canibalism on your boyfriend. Obviously we're not going to stay here. We're going to turn around, stop at a nice restaurant and then go back home."

"What? No way!" Spencer said. "The beavcoon's just begging to be seen tonight!"

"Spencer, are you crazy?" Carly said. "Sam will _eat _Freddie if we don't get some food, and right now I'm thinking about cooking you up!"

"This is the woods, you guys," Spencer said. "There's food all around us. Freddie, Gibby and I will go out and find us some dinner. I have fishing rods in the back and an edible berry app on my phone."

"Fish and berries?" Sam said, narrowing her eyes at Gibby. "_That's _what my dinner's become? You better sleep with one eye open tonight, Gibby!"

"You girls stay at the camp site and throw these down on the ground," Spencer said, handing Carly a large bag of wood chips.

"What are these for?" Carly asked.

"They'll attract the beavcoon, duh."

"Baby, if you bring me back some ham I'll go with you to your next AV club so all those guys stop thinking that you're lying about having a girlfriend," Sam said to Freddie.

"Where am I supposed to get ham?" Freddie asked.

"At least bring back a big fish then," Sam sighed.

"I'll try," Freddie said, giving Sam a quick kiss as Spencer handed him a fishing rod.

"Alright guys, let's get going," Spencer said. "And remember, girls, wood chips all around!"

"Is there even a lake around here?" Gibby asked as the guys made their way into the woods.

"According to this map there is," Spencer said, opening a large map. "I think we head North for awhile and then we turn east."

"And do you _know _how to fish?" Freddie asked.

"It can't be that hard," Spencer said dismissively. "You throw the hook in, you wait a few minutes and BAM! You have a fish. But be on the look out for berries, though."

"Man, it's getting dark," Gibby commented. "This is why I wish you would've let me bring my Safety Man flashlight."

"I brought a flashlight," Spencer said, rolling his eyes. "A manly flashlight. See, it's blue!"

"Well turn it on, I can barely see," Freddie said.

"Can do," Spencer said, turning the device on. The beam of light flickered for a second, and then went out entirely.

"Uh-oh," Spencer said. "That wasn't supposed to happen."

"Please tell me we have a spare," Freddie said slowly.

"Er..."

"Oh man, we're gonna die," Gibby said, leaning against a tree. "And I had a fight with my therapist right before this and now I'll never get to say I'm sorry!"

"Pull it together, Gibby!" Spencer said, smacking the boy on the back of his head.

"Ow!"

"Sorry. Look, this isn't a big deal. We'll just head back to the RV and get another flashlight," Spencer said.

"You're right," Freddie nodded. He turned around and frowned. "Um...which way will get us back?"

"Good question," Spencer said, looking down at his map, which he could barely see from the darkness. "Okay, I think we're here...or maybe here. And the RV's here...or maybe here..."

"Dude!" Freddie exclaimed. "You got us lost?"

"We're not lost!" Spencer said. "We came from that direction, right? So we'll just head that way."

"Fine," Freddie sighed.

"This isn't how I thought I'd go," Gibby said, following Freddie and Spencer. "I thought I'd die with at least half a beard grown."

"I don't think we're going in the right direction," Freddie said after a few minutes. "I don't remember anything we're passing."

"Well, maybe we should just keep going and hope that we wind up back where we started..." Spencer said. "Come on, let's keep walking."

The guys walked in silence, dragging their aching feet. Finally, the reached the spot where they had first realized they were lost.

"Let's try that direction," Freddie said. "Hopefully that way will-"

Suddenly, they heard a tree rustle, causing all of them to jump.

"What-what was that?" Gibby asked shakily.

"Maybe just the wind?" Spencer whispered.

"Spencer? There's no wind," Freddie said.

The tree rustled again, and they heard a soft hissing noise.

"Ahh!" all three men shouted, and without a second thought, they ran as fast as their legs could carry them. They ran for what felt like hours, until Freddie finally said, "Hey! I think I see the RV!"

"Oh sweet corn, yes!" Spencer cried.

The guys rushed out of the woods, collapsing on the ground next to the RV.

"What happened to you guys?" Carly frowned, putting down the burger she was eating.

"There is a monster in there!" Gibby panted.

"What?" Sam frowned, setting down her fries and walking over to Freddie.

"We were lost, and then we heard-there was no wind-it was-" Freddie breathed.

"Are you sure it wasn't just your imagination?" Carly asked, helping her brother and Gibby to their feet.

"No!" Spencer exclaimed. "It was-wait. Why do you guys have food?"

He was looking at the large bags of burgers and fries that Sam and Carly had sitting on a picnic blanket.

"Oh, well it turns out that that there's a service plaza right across the street from here," Carly explained. "And we figured you guys wouldn't have much luck getting food, so we thought we'd take care of dinner."

"What?" Spencer exclaimed. "So while we were lost in the woods for hours, you two were stuffing your faces?"

"Hours?" Sam said. "It's been like, fifteen minutes."

"Fifteen minutes?" Freddie repeated. "No way, that's impossible!" He pulled out his pearphone. "It's been at least-oh. Fifteen minutes."

"Can we eat?" Gibby asked. "I'm starving!"

"Yes, we brought enough for everyone," Carly laughed.

"So did you see the beavcoon?" Spencer asked, taking the a burger that Sam tossed at him.

"Yeah, a whole army of them came right before you guys ran out and was teaching us the ways of their kind," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Really? And I missed that!"

"He's...he's not too good with sarcasm when it comes to beavcoons," Carly sighed.

...

Later that night, after the five had gone to bed, Sam woke up. She was about to go back to sleep, when she noticed that Freddie's sleeping bag was empty.

"Freddie?" Sam whispered, sliding out of her own sleeping bag. She looked around and saw her boyfriend leaning against the side of the RV.

"Baby, what are you doing?" Sam asked, walking over to him.

"Couldn't sleep," he mumbled.

"What's up?"

"Nothing."

"Freddie," Sam said. "I'm an expert liar. And I know when people lie to me."

"It's just," Freddie sighed. "You must think I'm a complete nub."

"And that's news to you?" Sam frowned.

"I couldn't even handle being in the woods for less than twenty minutes before running out," Freddie said. "I couldn't even catch you a fish to eat for dinner. If there hadn't been a burger place across the street, you would've starved and it would've been all my fault. You must think I'm a huge whimp; not even being able to take care of my girlfriend in the woods."

"Baby," Sam laughed. "I've always known you would never be able to handle yourself in the woods! I mean, look at you!"

"Thanks," Freddie muttered.

"But come on, you think that makes me love you any less?" Sam asked, putting her arms around him. "Do you think I _care _whether or not you could catch me dinner in the woods?"

"You don't?" Freddie asked.

"No!" Sam said. "I mean, you find me other ways to get me food."

"That's true," Freddie said thoughtfully.

"Besides," Sam shrugged. "You tried, didn't you?"

Freddie smiled and pulled Sam closed.

"So we'll just never go camping on a date," Sam told him. "And if for some reason we do, we won't leave Gibby in charge of food."

"Deal," Freddie chuckled.


	153. Chapter 153

_Peasant _

"Sam, I really don't think we should be doing this," Freddie said as him and Sam stood outside the movie theatre.

"Why not?" Sam frowned.

"Because it's illegal!" Freddie hissed. He looked visibly nervous, all sweaty and anxious and constantly looking over his shoulder.

"Relax," Sam said. She, unlike Freddie, appeared calm and collect. "Hey, is that a new yogurt place? We should go there after the movie."

"I can't believe we're going to do this," Freddie mumbled.

"Hey, you agreed to it," Sam reminded him.

"You can't make me agree to things while we're in the middle of making out!" he exclaimed. "That's totally unfair! I mean last time you did that and got me to go with you to that rodeo, I wound up nearly getting gorded by a bull!"

"Come on, you don't want to see _The Attack of the Mummy Ninjas_?" Sam asked. "They're supposed to invade this tiny little village and use a bunch of the peasants there as bait to get their enemies, the vampire policemen."

"But we're not allowed into that movie," Freddie pointed out.

"Look," Sam sighed, rolling her eyes. "We're seventeen. We should be able to see any rated R movie we want, no problem. But because _your_ crazy mom and her insane Aggressive Parenting freaks protested outside this theatre for weeks to get the owner to change the age to see R movies to eighteen, we now have use fake ID's."

"Okay, how about this?" Freddie tried to reason. "We drive to the movie theatre across town? I don't mind driving the extra half hour. That way we can see the movie _legally_."

"No way!" Sam frowned. "That theatre doesn't have the nachos I like."

"I'll go to the snack bar here before we leave and buy you an order to bring with us!" Freddie pleaded.

"Nah," Sam said, shaking her head. "The seats here are way comfier. Now let's go get in line before all the tickets sell out."

"What if colleges find out about this?" Freddie asked as he followed Sam inside the theatre. "I won't be able to get into MIT or Cal Tech or any of those other universities, and you won't be able to get in where you want either!"

"Dude, if we get caught, which we won't," Sam said. "Any college I apply to won't even notice this with all my other stuff. Now here, this is your ID."

"This looks nothing like me!" Freddie exclaimed. "And why is my name Wilbur Bighead?"

"Your head's kind of big, baby," Sam shrugged. "Here's my ID."

"You're blonde, Sam," Freddie said, looking at the picture of what was supposed to be his girlfriend. "This lady has darker hair than Carly!"

"No one looks at the pictures, just the birth date," Sam told him. "So just don't screw up and in a few minutes we'll be watching the greatest movie of all time."

"Wouldn't you rather see that new romantic comedy that's out?" Freddie asked, using one last attempt to get out of this. "I hear it's pretty good."

"You know how bored I get in romantic comedies," Sam told him. "I either wind up falling asleep or swapping spit with you the whole movie."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"Well, no," Sam grinned. "But that's not the point. The point is I'm not sitting through a romantic comedy when there's vampires and mummy ninjas battling it out in the next theatre! Now can we please just get out tickets?"

"Fine," Freddie conceded. Him and Sam walked over towards the ticket line. While they waited, Freddie tried to act natural, but his heart was racing and he felt his hands shaking.

"Next!" called the movie usher working the counter.

"Er, hi," Freddie said as him and Sam stepped up to the counter. "Two-two tickets to _The Attack of the Mummy Ninjas."_

"I need to see some ID," the usher said lazily. "And some from your girlfriend there too."

"Um, yeah, yeah," Freddie said, trying to keep it together. "I do have it. I _am_ eighteen."

"Smooth, Fredbag," Sam whispered as she handed the usher her own ID.

"Here it is!" Freddie said, handing over his ID.

The movie usher looked at the cards.

"I-I know I don't really look like the picture on that ID, but I swear it's me! I, er, just died my hair. And a nose job. And shaved my beard. And-"

"Here you go," the usher said, rolling his eyes, handing Freddie the two movie tickets. "That'll be fifteen dollars."

"Oh, um, okay," Freddie nodded, quickly pulling out his wallet.

"You wouldn't survive five minutes in juvie," Sam sighed as her and Freddie walked away from the ticket counter.

"I think that guy was onto us," Freddie said anxiously, putting away his fake ID. "He probably called someone to come and get us."

"He didn't care, Freddie," Sam said. "You know how many people use fake ID's to get into movies?"

"I'm a criminal," Freddie said softly. "Oh my God, I've broken the law!"

"I'm about to break your face if you don't cool it," Sam said warningly.

After Freddie bought Sam an armful of snacks, they took their seats in the theatre.

"Oh man, we're the youngest people in here," Freddie muttered, looking around. "We stick out like sore thumbs. We're so going to get busted."

"No we won't," Sam said, shaking her head as she stuffed a handful of popcorn into her mouth.

Freddie continued to voice his concerns until the previews finally came on, much to Sam's relief.

When at last the movie ended and the mummy ninjas had successfully beaten the vampire policemen, Sam and Freddie filed out of the theatre.

"You see, we didn't get caught," Sam said, taking her boyfriend's hand. "You were all paranoid for nothing."

"Maybe you were right," Freddie smiled. "Besides, that movie _was_ pretty good."

"Excuse me," came a voice from behind the couple. They turned around to see a tall man wearing an usher uniform. "Can I ask you two something?"

"He knows!" Freddie whispered urgently to Sam. "We've got to get out of here!"

Freddie quickly ran off towards the exit, leaving Sam, rolling her eyes behind him.

"I was just going to ask if you two were the kids from iCarly," the usher frowned. "I love that show. So does my niece."

"Yeah, that's us," Sam nodded.

"Wow, do you think I could get an autograph?" the usher asked excitedly.

"Um, sure," Sam agreed.

She quickly signed her name on a napkin for the usher and then went outside where Freddie was pacing nervously. "Sam!" he cried, running over to her. "What happened? I thought you were right behind me! You're usually so fast when you're running from authority. Did he call the cops? Did he ban you from the theatre? Oh man, I feel awful, I left you all by yourself, but I _told _you we were going to get caught! And-"

"He wanted an autograph, you doof," Sam cut him off. "He watches iCarly!"

"Oh," Freddie said lamely.

"Honestly," Sam said as the couple headed back to Freddie's car. "You'd think you'd never broken a rule before."

"I already told you, I haven't!"

"Wait, you were serious about that?" Sam frowned.

"Yeah," he nodded.

"You mean even when you were like a little kid, you never, oh, I don't know, stayed up past your bedtime or snuck desert before dinner?"

"You've met my mom," Freddie chuckled. "She never let me out of her sight for more than thirty seconds, and even then she had a little microphone clipped to my clothes so she knew what I was up to at all times."

"Wow," Sam said, laughing. "Well then you know what? I'm _honored _that I was here when Fredward Benson broke his first rule. Even if you did wind up running away screaming like a little girl in the end."

"Aw," Freddie grinned. "And I couldn't think of anyone else I would want to have by my side during the experience."

Sam smiled and leaned up to kiss him.

"Hey, I have an idea," Freddie said, raising an eyebrow mischievously. "Why don't we go get some fries at the Groovy Smoothie and I _won't _cut them into tiny pieces like my mom tells me to."

"Jeesh, now you're just living on the edge," Sam laughed.


	154. Chapter 154

**AN-So this oneshot is actually composed of two requests. They were similar, but slightly different, so I thought it would be easier to just put them both together. This oneshot is a follow up piece to the oneshot where the gang went to the beach and Sam and Carly told Freddie about the rating system they use for guys. **

**Oh, and LimiRAe, you are totally correct about the Foxtrot reference! **

**...**

_Brass_

"This video of you two girls interviewing this bottle of mustard is a big hit," Freddie said, looking on his laptop. "Over five hundred thousand hits, and I just put it on the website an hour ago!"

"Cool chiz," Sam said, putting on a pair of earrings as Carly applied another layer of lip gloss.

"Maybe this one will be even more popular of that last Idiot Farm Girl video," Carly said.

"Who knows," Freddie shrugged. "So where are you two going tonight?"

"That under 21 dance club," Sam replied. "You sure you don't want to come?"

"Nah, my mom's making me help her organize her dust ruffle collections," Freddie said. "You two have fun, though. That club's actually pretty fun."

"You've been there?" Carly asked.

"Yeah, he took my sister there on a date, remember?" Sam said. "And kissed her."

"Baby, are you ever going to let me live that down?" Freddie moaned. "I've told you a thousand times, I thought she was you! And you let me go on thinking it _was_ you for three years!"

"Maybe one of these days," Sam grinned playfully. "I mean, Melanie _did_ say you were a pretty awful kisser, so at least I know she's not interested in you."

"What?" Freddie frowned. "I'm not an-you know what, I'm not going to argue with that, it's just going to get me into trouble."

"Smart move," Carly laughed. She grabbed her purse. "Have fun with your mom tonight."

"Yeah, don't get too wild with those dust ruffles," Sam told him, giving him a quick kiss.

When Carly and Sam arrived at the club, they found themselves a table and ordered a few fancy soda drinks and a couple of appetizers.

"You know, I was thinking," Carly said, taking a sip of her drink. "After that total fall out with that 82 I met at the coffee shop last week, I think I'm going to lay off boys tonight. It's just not worth it. I'm here with my best friend and I'm going to enjoy myself."

"Carly, you say that at least once a month," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "And you last about five minutes and then you see some hot guy and you start rating him all over again."

"I'm serious this time," Carly said firmly. "So come on, let's go dance!"

"This is a stupid song though," Sam groaned. "It's one of those songs with those lame dances that are so popular for like, two months, and then they disappear."

"Yeah, so?" Carly said, grabbing her best friend's wrist and dragging her out to the dance floor.

The dance floor was packed of couples, large groups and even a few teens who were dancing by themselves.

"Sam, I think that guy over there is checking us out!" Carly suddenly squealed. "I'd say he's...oh, a 73, what do you think?"

"I thought you weren't going to have anything to do with guys tonight?" Sam said.

"I'm-I'm not," Carly said, unconvincingly. "You know, I'm sort of thirsty. All this dancing has really made me work up a sweat. Let's go to the soda bar."

"You just want to get closer to Mr. 73," Sam smiled knowingly.

"Oh come on, Puckett," Carly said, her face turning red. The girls made their way through the sea of dancing teens to a large counter top where several servers were taking orders from thirsty dancers.

"I'll have a diet Peppy Cola with lime," Carly said.

"Give me a root beer float," Sam said.

"Coming right up," the server said.

"I think that guy who just walked in is a total 90," a blonde girl next to Carly and Sam said to her group of girlfriends.

"No way," one of her friends said. "He's a 60, at best."

"You need your eyes checked, he's obviously a 75," said another girl.

"Hey, are they using our rating scale?" Sam asked Carly, frowning.

"Sounds like it," Carly said, taking a sip of her drink. "That's so cool! We've inspired people!"

"How do they even know about it?"

"I might've blogged about it..."

"We've really got to keep you away from the Internet," Sam chuckled, shaking her head as she took her root beer float the server had just slid across the counter.

"Hey, you know who's a total 100," the blonde girl continued. "That Freddie Benson kid from iCarly."

"Oh yeah, definitely," one of her friends nodded.

"Oh my God, what I would give to squeeze one of those huge biceps," a third girl squealed.

"Sam!" Carly said, quickly grabbing her friend as she slammed her root beer float down and raised a fist. She pulled her away from the soda counter.

"Why'd you do that?" Sam exclaimed once Carly released her, silently curing the promise she had made years ago to never hurt Carly. "I needed to pound those girls!"

"Sam, they didn't do anything wrong," Carly said.

"What? What do you _mean _they didn't do anything wrong? They're sitting there giving Freddie a perfect score with _our _rating scale!"

"You gave Freddie a perfect rating too," Carly pointed out.

"_I'm _allowed to! He's _my _boyfriend!" Sam said angrily.

"Oh what? So no other girl on the planet is allowed to think Freddie's attractive?" Carly asked, rolling her eyes.

"That's right," Sam nodded. "Now can I please go back over there and hurt those girls?"

"Sam, no, if you do your parole officer will just throw you in juvie and then you won't be able to see Freddie except on visiting days," Carly said firmly. "Look, there's no reason to be jealous. None of those girls are going to run and whisk Freddie off now and take him from you. You two have been dating for close to a year now. You know Freddie would never, ever, look at any other girl the way he looks at you. It's not healthy for your relationship to get jealous every single time a girl glances at Freddie. Now, I'd understand if Freddie was here and those girls were flirting with him to his face non-stop, but all they did was make a harmless observation about his attractiveness. Would you rather them had say that he was a 30 or something? It looks good for you that your boyfriend gets such high ratings. So how about you go back over there, finish your root beer float and then we can play a nice round of Help Carly Get the Cute 73's Number, okay?"

Carly finished her speech and looked hopefully as Sam, hoping she got her point across.

Sam was quiet for a minute, and appeared to be in deep thought. "I have brass knuckles at home from my Uncle Carmine. I can take a cab and be back here with them in twenty minutes."

"Did you not listen to a word I said?" Carly said, exasperated.

"Did you say something?"

"Ugh, you're impossible," Carly groaned. "Good, look. The girls are leaving."

"Man, and I didn't even get to put hot sauce in their drinks," Sam said.

The girls arrived back at Bushwell Plaza shortly after midnight. They let themselves into the Shay's apartment, where Freddie and Spencer were in the middle of playing What Am I?

"Am I flammable?" Freddie asked.

"Well...I've set it on fire," Spencer answered.

"That could be anything!" Freddie said, who's card read: jellybean.

"You guys realize how lame it is to be playing that game all night, don't you?" Sam asked.

"Yeah well, my hot girlfriend was out with her friend all night," Freddie grinned. "So after I helped my mom, I had to find something that could take my mind off her."

"Did it work?" Sam grinned, leaning over the the back of the couch.

"Nope," Freddie said, leaning in towards her.

"Hey! No flirting and kissing in the middle of the game!" Spencer yelled. "I think I'm really close to figuring out what I am!"

"You're a clown," Carly said, reading off the card on his forehead.

"And you're a jellybean," Sam told Freddie.

"Every time!" Spencer cried angrily, throwing his headband off. "You guys can't let us finish one lousy game!"

"Oh calm down," Carly laughed.

"I'm going to bed," Spencer said moodily. "I'm all depressed now. And no monkey business, you two!" He added to Sam and Freddie.

"So, you guys have fun tonight?" Freddie asked, putting his arm around Sam, who had taken Spencer's spot on the couch.

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "I chugged five root beer floats in under two minutes, which means my picture goes up on their wall of fame."

"It was a lot more fun once Sam stopped planning to beat up this group of girls," Carly said, taking off her heels.

"Why were you planning to beat up a group of girls?" Freddie asked Sam as Carly bid them both goodnight as she headed upstairs.

"They were annoying me," Sam said, getting up. "Hey, can you help me hack into Carly's blog and take down a post?"

"Um, no," Freddie frowned. "Why?"

"Because she put up that scale her and I made up for rating guys, and I don't think most of these crazy girls on the Internet are ready to handle it," she replied. "What makes you say that?"

"Because they clearly don't know how to use it properly," Sam said. "I mean, these deranged girls at the dance club tonight had the insane idea that _you _should get a 100."

"Really?" Freddie grinned cockily. "Cool."

"Do you _want _to find out how it feels to have my fist jammed up your nose?" she snapped.

"Oh come on, what's the big deal," Freddie said. "You told me that day at the beach that you gave me a perfect rating."

"For the tenth time, _I'm _allowed to!" Sam said. "Sam Puckett would look like a fool dating any guy less than a 100."

"Wait, is this why you wanted to hurt these girls?" Freddie asked.

"No..." Sam said lamely.

"Sam, that's crazy," Freddie smiled gently. "Don't get me wrong, I'm flattered, but still, it's crazy. I mean, do you have any idea what sort of things guys say about you?"

"What sort of things?" Sam asked hesitantly.

"Like that your crazy hot," Freddie said. "And that you look _really_ good in those jeans with the rips in them and some other things I'm not going to mention because quite frankly they're sort of creepy."

"Guys really say that stuff about me?" Sam asked softly.

"All the time," Freddie nodded. "And you have no idea how jealous it makes me, but I know you'd knock out any of those guys if they tried anything, just like I know you know I'd tell any girl that hits on me, which truthfully, baby, hasn't happened since before we were dating, that I have a beautiful girlfriend."

"Yeah, I know," Sam mumbled. "Hey, I found Carly's blog with our scale on it."

"Wow, that's pretty elaborate," Freddie said, reading the screen.

"Hey," Sam said suddenly. "Rate me!"

"What?" Freddie laughed. "I thought this scale was for guys."

"It can go both ways," Sam shrugged. "Just tweak it a little."

"Fine," Freddie said. "I give you a 100."

"You're just saying that," Sam said, punching him in the shoulder.

"No I'm not," Freddie said sincerely, rubbing his shoulder.

"You're really giving me 10 out of 10 in every category?" Sam asked. "What about in personality? I'm aggressive and loud!"

"So? You're also sweet when you want to be," Freddie told her. "Like when you found that puppy in the park last week and gave it half your ham sandwich."

"It looked hungry," Sam mumbled. "But you can't seriously give me a 10 in wardrobe. I wear dresses like five times a year. The only reason I wore one tonight is because Carly threatened to start buying the low fat ham."

"I happen to think your clothes look very good on you," Freddie said. "I don't like it when girls wear weird things. It's better when they just look comfortable."

"Okay, but I can't get a 10 in facial structure," Sam continued. "My nose is totally off center!"

"Now you're just being crazy," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Look, Sam, we could go through each category, but there's no way I'm ever going to give you less than a perfect score in each one. Sure, maybe I'm biased because I'm your boyfriend, but you know what? In my eyes, you really _are_ a perfect 100."

Sam smiled. "Gee, how long you been saving that corny line?"

"For awhile," Freddie grinned, leaning down to kiss her.

"Fredward Benson!" The apartment door swung open and Mrs. Benson marched in. "Do you have any idea what time it is? I _try _to give you the freedom you've been begging for, but when you stay out into the wee hours of the morning, giving your poor mother a heart attack wondering where you are, it's no wonder I'm so cautious of you!"

"Mom, I _told _you I was going to be here, right across the hall," Freddie sighed.

"You could still call!" she exclaimed. "Now come on, mister. A growing boy needs his sleep, though I really do think you should try and stop growing. You're getting too big for our matching sweater collection."

"I'll be there in a minute," Freddie said as Sam snickered.

"I'll have the clock running," Mrs. Benson said firmly as she left the apartment.

"Well that sort of killed the mood," he said.

"Doesn't she always?" Sam pointed out.

"True," Freddie agreed. He gave her a quick kiss. "I'd better go. I'll see you tomorrow, baby."

"Night," Sam said.

"Five seconds!" Mrs. Benson called from across the hall. "Move it! Now!"


	155. Chapter 155

**AN-This piece is a follow up to chapter 146, where Freddie sang to Sam on iCarly to get back together with her during iOpen a Restaurant. It's showing their date following the song.**

**...**

_Tying_

"And remember, Gibby, there needs to be roses on the table," Freddie said into his cellphone, tying his tie as best as he could with one hand. "And candles. Candles are good. All girls love candles, right?"

"Relax, Gibby will take care of you," Gibby said.

"And remember, when you bring us our lasagna, you put a whole tub of parmesan cheese in front of Sam," Freddie said.

"I'm shredding it now," Gibby said. "And do you know hard it was to get Principle Franklin to let me keep the restaurant open late just for you two? I had to promise the man free Gibby Subs for a month!"

"I really appreciate you helping me with this," Freddie said, frowning at his horribly tied tie in the mirror. "It means a lot to me. You're a real friend."

"Yeah, just remember that when it's kachi pants day and I need someone to dress up with," Gibby said.

"Sure, sure," Freddie said. He looked at his watch. "Okay, I'm going to pick up Sam from Carly's now. We should be there by seven."

"Got it," Gibby said.

Freddie hung up his phone, looked at his nervous reflection one last time in the mirror and then headed across the hall.

"Hey," he said to Carly and Spencer, who were huddled by the counter, watching something on the computer.

"Oh, hi," Carly said, quickly closing the window that had been on the computer. "What's up?"

"Lovely weather we're having, isn't it?" Spencer asked.

"You were watching the video of me singing to Sam again, weren't you?" Freddie asked, rolling his eyes.

"Yes, fine, we were," Carly admitted. "But it's just so cute!"

"All the ladies in my book club think so too," Spencer nodded.

"Right," Freddie nodded. "Is-Is Sam ready yet?"

"She's just finishing up her makeup now," Carly told him.

"So where are you two going?" Spencer asked.

"He got Gibby to keep restaurant in the school basement open for just the two of them," Carly said before Freddie could you answer. "Can you believe that? Gibby gets to be there, but not me!"

"You got wazzed off when Sam and I took you on our date to Pinni's," Freddie pointed out.

"Yes, but that was because you two were fighting non-stop on that date," Carly said. "This one's going to be all romantic and sweet and-wow. I _really _need to get a boyfriend."

"I've already told Gibby to act like he's not there," Freddie said. "He promised he's just going to bring us our food, and then he's going to across the street to his aerobics class, so you're really not missing anything."

"Don't worry about me," Carly smiled. "You guys just have fun. I'll go see if Sam's ready."

"Okay, thanks," Freddie said as Carly climbed upstairs. He turned to Spencer. "So, any plans for you tonight?"

"Nope, it's just me and my boxed set of the complete series of _Lovely Little Fibbers_-I mean, truck races," Spencer said. "But, before the girls get back down here...I know the 'official' story is that Sam dumped you back when you were first dating, but I'm not a _total_ idiot. I know your heart wasn't the only one that got stomped on that night. So just...just don't-"

"Don't worry, Spencer," Freddie said. "I won't."

"Carly for the twelfth time, enough with the hairspray!" Sam said, hurrying down the stairs, Carly at her heels.

"Just a little more, please!" Carly begged.

"No!" She turned to Freddie. "So, um, should we get out of here? Before Carly starts trying to attack me with mascara again?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah, um, sure, let's-let's go." Freddie had been so busy staring at Sam that he had barely heard a word she was saying. She was wearing a dark pink dress with black heels that looked stunning on her.

"I'll wait up!" Carly called after the couple. "I want details!"

Sam and Freddie walked downstairs silently. Freddie stared at her hand hanging loosely at her side, wondering how she'd react if he held it. Was it too soon for that? Or was she _expecting _it? And was his hesitation making him look bad?

"Are we taking the bus?" Sam asked finally, once they reached the lobby.

"Er, no," Freddie said. "I talked T-Bo into letting me borrow the keys to his van."

"He let you borrow his Smootiemobile?" Sam asked.

"Well, I told him if he did, I'd give him the password to unlock all of the channels on our T.V.," Freddie said.

"Impressive," Sam smiled. "You know, you've had your license for how long and you've drove, what, one time?"

"Yeah, well, crazy mom," Freddie grinned. "Come on."

The couple headed out into the parking lot, and silence had once again befallen them.

_Think of something to say! _Freddie said desperately. _You've talked to her before! You've yelled at her, argued with her, kissed her and sang to her before, and now you can't think of one dang thing to say to her? Come on, Benson! You're better than this!_

"So, um, I heard the city council's issuing a new water limit for households of over four to try and help us through this dry season," Freddie blurted out.

"Neither of us live in a house with more than four people in it," Sam frowned.

"Oh. Well, you know, just a fun fact..."

Freddie was thankful when he finally pulled into the school parking lot. Him and Sam walked through the dark hallways down to the basement, where Gibby had cleared all the tables away except for one, which had a vase of fresh roses on it.

"Good evening," Gibby said. "May I escort you two to your table?"

"Why's Gibby being, well, weirder than usual?" Sam whispered to Freddie as they followed him to their table.

"I told him not to act like our friend Gibby tonight, but our waiter," Freddie explained.

"Oh, I thought he drank from water fountain on the second floor again," Sam said.

"Your dinner will be here shortly," Gibby said, setting down a basket of biscuits on the table.

Freddie stared at Sam, who was playing with the end of the tablecloth, racking his brain for something to say to her that didn't involve city water restrictions.

"So, um," Sam said. "How-How long did it take you to write that song you sang on iCarly?"

"About a week," Freddie told her. "It took me awhile to make it rhyme."

Sam nodded. Freddie knew it was his turn to start the conversation this time, but what to say...?

"I'm sorry," he finally said.

"For what?" Sam asked, confused.

"For everything," Freddie said. "For not taking the hams out of my pants fast enough and getting your cousin and uncle in trouble, for not appreciating it when you would get revenge on the teachers who gave me unfair grades, for not buying you one of T-Bo's huge Love Smoothies everyday, and, well, for making this the most awkward night you've probably ever had."

Sam said nothing for a moment, and then burst out laughing.

"What?" Freddie asked.

"Dude, you sang me a cheesy love song live on the Internet and _you're _apologizing?"

"Well...yeah?"

"Come on," Sam said. "Look, all night I've been trying to think of a way to say sorry to _you _for all the things that I screwed up when we were dating for the first time."

"Like what?" Freddie asked.

"Oh, I don't know," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "For making you spend your entire savings buying me food, for getting you kicked out of your train club, and for forcing you stuff hams in your pants?"

"Yeah, well, I kept trying to correct your table manners on our dates," Freddie said. "I mean who does that?"

"I threw your phone at a kayaker!" Sam said.

"I made us take the long way home from the ice cream place before my mom found out about us just so we wouldn't have to pass the hospital where she works!"

"I made you carry me on your back those two extra miles!"

"I-wait," Freddie said. "Are we really arguing about who messed up our relationship more?"

"Wow, we are," Sam nodded. "And Carly said one day we'd run out of things to fight about..."

"Look," Freddie sighed. "Maybe...maybe it would be best if we just admit that we both did things our first time around in this relationship that weren't...the best."

"Yeah, maybe," Sam agreed.

"But you know," Freddie smiled, feeling a surge of courage fun through his body as he slowly picked up Sam's hand that had been resting on the table and cupping it in his. "There _were _some pretty great times."

"Like when you spent a whole twenty minutes brushing my hair that one day?" Sam grinned.

"Or when when you would cuddle up next to me when we would watch T.V," Freddie nodded.

"And what about all the kissing?" Sam asked.

"That was definitely fun," Freddie laughed.

"You know," Sam said softly, looking down at her silverware. "I really liked that song of yours, but...I really wished we would've just stayed together."

"But you seemed fine after the breakup," Freddie reasoned. "I thought I was the only one who was a mess after."

"You know I have a reputation to protect," Sam said, smiling a little bit.

"I wish we would've never broken up either," Freddie told her. "But-But you know I meant what I said after. And I still do mean it."

"I still mean it too," Sam said, her cheeks turning red.

"Aw!"

The couple looked back at the kitchen, where they had both forgotten Gibby was preparing their meals.

"Sorry...it's just this face I drew on this tomato is so darn cute," Gibby said.

"Um, how's our lasagna coming along?" Freddie asked.

"Oh, right, here it is," Gibby said, rushing over with two plates. "Now, here's the key," he tossed it to Sam and began to unbutton his shirt, revealing a bright purple, and unnaturally tight, tank top. "You two lock up. I've got my aerobics class in ten minutes and I need to get there early or all the women wind up taking the good spots."

"Have...fun," Sam said, still cringing at the sight of Gibby's tank top.

"Yeah, and thanks again for helping me with all of this," Freddie said. "I owe you one."

The two watched Gibby disappear upstairs.

"Wow, Gibby gave me about five pounds of parmesan," Sam said happily, biting into her lasagna.

"I made sure of that," Freddie told her. "I'm not about to try and change your cheese habits."

"Smart man," Sam laughed. "Smart man."

"Hey," Freddie said, smiling at her. "I love you."

Sam grinned. "I love you too."


	156. Chapter 156

**AN-This oneshot takes place after the seddie arc, and in it, Sam and Freddie aren't dating.**

**...**

_Bulletin_

"Sam! Stop it!" Freddie yelled. "Give me back my laptop!"

"After I check my email," Sam said.

"I was right in the middle of posting a new bulletin on my blog!" Freddie exclaimed. "And now you lost it!"

"And I'm sure your ten followers will be so disappointed," Sam scoffed, rolling her eyes.

"Oh yeah? And I'm sure your empty inbox could've waited!"

"Hey, I get ten times as many emails as you!" Sam snapped. "The only person who emails you is your mom giving you your little reminders to take your special vitamins."

"Let me see your inbox then," Freddie said, reaching for his laptop. "If you're _so_ popular."

"No way, Benson!"

"You look through my inbox all the time!"

"Is it my fault you make such easy passwords?" Sam asked, rolling her eyes. "FYI, 12345 isn't exactly a strong password!"

"What are you two arguing about _now_?" Carly groaned, coming downstairs.

"Sam's being her usual self, that's all," Freddie huffed, crossing his arms.

"Freddie's being a nub-faced loser, like always."

"You know, you two," Carly sighed. "You'd think after spending, what was it, like a month dating, you'd be able to get along better?"

"No, because I'm still mad at this one for taking away that month of my life," Sam said. "That's time I'll never get back, Carly!"

"Hey!" Freddie said indignantly.

"Sam, be nice, or no frozen yogurt for you tonight," Carly said.

"Frozen yogurt? What happened to ice cream?" Sam frowned. "You know, the real stuff?"

"Frozen yogurt's healthier," Carly pointed out. "Besides, this place is really cool, it's all modern and fun, you'll like it."

"Is it cool if I just stay here while you two have your little 'Girls Night'?" Freddie asked. "My mom's going through my baby album across the hall..."

"Yeah, sure, Spencer should be back from Socko's soon," Carly said. "You ready, Sam?"

"Yeah, here, nub," Sam said, closing Freddie's lap top and tossing it back to him.

"Careful!" Freddie cried. "This is the new Pearbook Expert!"

"I don't care!" Sam said, heading out of the apartment with Carly.

...

"See, I told you this place was cool," Carly grinned as her and Sam sat at their table, eating their frozen yogurt.

"I did like the fifty-foot toppings bar," Sam said.

"I know you did," Carly laughed. "You think you put enough chocolate chips on your yogurt?"

"I can't believe you just showered yours with fruit," Sam cringed.

"Hey, I haven't gotten to eat any fruit all week; Spencer's using all of ours to make some sculpture."

"A fruit sculpture?" Sam frowned.

"No, I think it has something to do with a clown," Carly said. "Hey, look over there. It's Jenna Whaler from English."

"Oh yeah," Sam said, turing around to look at their classmate, who was standing by the topping bar. "I hate her."

"Big surprise," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "It looks like she's here by herself, should we invite her over?"

"No! She's alone for a reason, Carly!" Sam hissed. "No one likes her!"

"Well maybe she's nice," Carly reasoned. "I'm going to call her over. Hey, Jenna!"

"Ugh, I'm going back to making you those videos on how to be meaner," Sam groaned.

"Oh, hey you guys," Jenna said, walking over to the girls.

"Hey, Sam and I were just hanging out," Carly smiled. "And we were wondering, if you weren't here with anyone, if you'd like to hang out with us."

"Hmmm, well, I guess that'd be fun," Jenna shrugged. "I was actually meeting some friends here, but um, they just called and said that all their cars broke down. Weird, right?"

"Oh, yeah," Sam mumbled.

"So, um, you like frozen yogurt?" Carly asked Jenna.

"It's okay I guess," Jenna said. "Hey, not to sound rude or anything, but I was watching your last iCarly the other day, and I found a few corrections that could be made."

"Oh," Carly blinked. "Well, um, yeah, you could tell us and then we could try and fix them."

"Where's Freddie?" she asked. "Most of them are about his camera work."

"He's at home, being a lonely nub," Sam said.

"Really? I thought he'd be here with you," Jenna said. "If I had ever dated a boy-I mean, when I was dating my last boyfriend, who's totally real and went to boarding school, I'd be spending my Saturday nights with him, but I guess you two don't-"

"Um, Freddie and I aren't dating anymore," Sam said quickly. "We broke up ages ago."

"Oh, I didn't know," Jenna said. "Well that's good. I always thought he was kind of ugly looking."

Sam nearly choked on her yogurt.

Jenna glanced down at her own yogurt. "I'll be right back. I'm gonna get more gummy bears..."

"You see why no one likes her!" Sam hissed once Jenna was out of earshot.

"She _was_ kind of obnoxious," Carly agreed. "So let's just finish up out yogurt and then we can make up an excuse to leave and-"

"And she thought I was still dating that nub," Sam continued angrily. "How dare she!"

"Well maybe she-"

"And who the heck does she think she is, calling Freddie ugly?" Sam snapped. "_Her _face looks like it got run over by a bus and then stomped on by a donkey!"

"Um..." Carly frowned.

"Like that chick could ever get a hot guy like him," Sam mumbled.

"Did-Did you just call Freddie hot?" Carly asked.

"What? No," Sam said quickly.

"But-But you said-"

"No, no I didn't," Sam said firmly. "I think _someone_ needs to lay off the kiwi."

"But I heard you-"

"I'm gonna run to the bathroom," Sam said, setting down her yogurt. "Try and get rid of Jenna while I'm gone."

"Wait! Sam!" Carly called after her best fried, but Sam determinedly ignored her.

She stepped into the restroom, and after making sure all the stalls were empty, she pulled out her phone and brought up her inbox. She scrolled down until she found the old emails from Freddie that he had sent her when they had been dating: her guilty pleasure.

She would find herself reading them whenever she couldn't seem to get the stubrag out of her mind, and right now, much to her dismay, her mind seemed to be swimming with images of Freddie Benson.


	157. Chapter 157

**AN-I love writing requests! If you've sent in a request, and you haven't seen it yet, don't worry, I'll put it up, but like I've said before, I'm adding them in the order I get them. Feel free to send in more, though. This oneshot takes place after iOpen a restaurant, but still involves the restaurant.**

**...**

_Altering_

"Man, we made a ton today," Gibby said, counting the bills in the cash register down in his basement restaurant.

"It's probably from your new Gibby Shakes," Carly laughed. "A bunch of kids tried to smuggle them into my physics class today."

"I still think we should up the price on those," Sam said, taking a bite of a leftover burger. "If we increase it by just a dollar, we could get 18% more profit each week."

"Okay, so you can figure that out," Freddie, who had been helping wash dishes, frowned. "But you can't figure out how to pass your trig class?"

"_This_ is important," Sam snapped.

"Play nice, you too," Carly ordered, looking up from her pearphone. "You know, _I _could go for a Gibby Shake..."

"I am nice," Sam insisted as Carly headed to the fridge to get one of the shakes. "Fredbag just annoys the chiz out of me."

"Yeah, like you're a walk in the park to be around," Freddie said, rolling her eyes.

"I'm delightful!"

Suddenly there was a crash, and Freddie, Sam and Gibby turned to look at Carly, who had just dropped the glass she had gotten from the fridge.

"Sorry, I'll clean it up," she said.

"I can't believe someone just left this burger sitting here half-finished," Sam commented as she stuffed the last of the burger in her mouth. "At least I got a free meal out of it...Anyway, I'm out of here. I need to get home before my neighbor; he's been stealing those Chinese menus they leave you on the door and today I'm going to catch him at it!"

"You know, they _do _have the same exact menus online," Carly said.

"I don't care! I don't want people taking my stuff!" Sam said.

"Oh, hey, Sam?" Gibby said as Sam was about head upstairs.

"Yeah?" Sam asked, pausing.

"Are you doing anything this Saturday night?"

"No, why?"

"Well," Gibby said. "I was wondering if maybe you'd want to get together and grab some dinner and see the new _Galaxy Wars _movie?"

Sam frowned. "Just the two of us?"

"Yup."

There was another crash; Freddie had just dropped the plate he was holding, but he didn't seem to notice as he stared at this scene.

"Um, sure," Sam shrugged.

"Cool," Gibby. "I'll pick you up at seven. My mom will drive us."

"Um, are you going to stand in that pile of broken plate forever?" Carly asked, stepping over towards Freddie.

"Yeah, clean it up, man," Gibby said, walking back over to the cash register. "Those plates cost a buck fifty a dozen!"

"Huh? Oh, yeah," Freddie said, looking down and only just realizing the broken plate. "I'll pay for that...I'm gonna go...big test tomorrow...mom's gonna give me a tick bath..."

"Okay..." Carly said, frowning at his strange behavior. "Bye."

Freddie grabbed his bag and quickly raced up the stairs.

_Did Gibby just ask Sam out? _Freddie asked himself as he began to walk towards Bushwell Plaza. _Gibby and Sam? On a date? _

It didn't make sense, why would Gibby, his supposed best guy friend, ask Sam out? Sam, who was his ex-girlfriend! And more importantly, why was he so upset about this...?

_It's just weird, that's all_, Freddie told himself. _That's why it's bothering you. I mean, they'd make a terrible couple! Sam's spent years beating that kid up and causing him emotional pain...just like with me. Crab! _

...

The iCarly trio sat up in the studio the next day after school. Carly and Freddie were working on their History homework while Sam flipped through a catalogue of novelty items.

"Hey, you can get this popcorn machine that beatboxes and lights up while it makes your popcorn," Sam said. "It's only 120 dollars..."

"You still owe T-Bo like 200 bucks for your smoothie tab he let you open," Freddie pointed out, looking up from his notebook. "Where are you going to get that sort of cash?"

"I'm just looking, calm down, Fredbutt," Sam said quickly. "Hey, a bacon scented scarf!"

"How well connected am I?" Spencer said happily, bouncing into the studio. "You know that girl Socko's been dating? The one who works at the movie theatre?"

"Yeah," Carly nodded, looking up from her textbook.

"Well he got her to give me a bunch of passes for free refreshments," Spencer said, pulling out a bunch of coupons and tossing them to the teens.

"Whoa, free nachos!" Sam said, grinning.

"Tell Socko's girlfriend thanks for us," Freddie said.

"Hey, Sam," Carly said, pulling out her pearphone, texting someone. "You should bring these to your movie date with Gibby."

"Oh, right," Sam nodded.

Freddie frowned, trying hard to go back to concentrating on his homework.

"You excited for it?" Carly asked her.

"Um, yeah," Sam nodded. "Gibby's great."

"You told him he was gonna wind up scraping gum off of pay phones for a living last week!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Well that's a nobel job, someone's got to do it!" Sam defended. Suddenly her phone dinged, and she looked down at the screen. "Dang it. Billy Boats is back at the restaurant and he's trying to get Gibby to take his shirt off again..."

"You gonna go help him?" Carly asked.

"I guess," Sam said, getting up. "Can I borrow a stick of butter?"

"There's some in the fridge," she replied.

Once Sam left, Carly turned to Freddie. "So, I'd say we've done enough homework for one night. You wanna help me with my laptop? Something wonky keeps happening every time I-"

"Gibby's a jerk!" Freddie said suddenly, slamming his textbook shut. "A big jerk!"

"What makes you say that?" Carly asked.

"Because!" Freddie said. "Because he-he-"

"This wouldn't have anything to do with him asking Sam out, would it?" Carly asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No!" Freddie said quickly.

"Well then why's he a-?"

"Since when does Sam even like Gibby?" Freddie asked. "Huh? She calls him a waste of space at _least _once a week!"

"Well they've gotten a lot closer ever since they've started working at Gibby's restaurant together," Carly said.

"But still! She's...And he's..."

"Gibby _does _have a reputation of getting girls a lot hotter than he is," Carly reminded him. "Sure, Sam's hot and Gibby's, well, Gibby, but Tasha was hot too."

"I wasn't saying Sam was hot," Freddie said, his face turning red. "And yeah! Tasha! What happened to her!"

"Her and Gibby broke up a month ago," Carly said at once.

"Well maybe I should go find her and ask her out," Freddie mumbled.

"Nah, she's already dating someone new," Carly said quickly. "It said so on her Splashface page."

"Oh," Freddie shrugged.

"Anyway," Carly continued. "I think Gibby's had a little crush on her for a little while now. Ever since she defended him against Billy Boats when his restaurant first opened."

Freddie crossed his arms moodily but said nothing.

"And who knows," Carly went on. "If she's going over there to help him again with Billy, maybe it will strengthen their relationship even more!"

"What?" Freddie exclaimed.

"Yeah, hey, maybe they'll officially start going out!" Carly said excitedly. "I mean, I know they already have their one date planned for Saturday, but maybe they'll start considering themselves a real couple! Wouldn't that be great!"

"Great, yeah," Freddie nodded, his stomach clenching. "Real peachy."

"I'm gonna go get some lemonade, you want any?" Carly asked, getting up.

"Um, no, thanks," Freddie replied.

"Suit yourself," Carly shrugged.

As Freddie sat there on his beanbag chair, he tried not to think about what would happen if Gibby and Sam became a couple.

Gibby and Sam.

Gibby and _his_ Sam.

_No, not 'your' Sam,_ he told himself firmly. _So what if Gibby dates her. He'll just have to be the one who wastes all his money buying her food, and deals with her temper, and has her getting him kicked out of clubs...and hugs her. And hold her hand. And kisses her...No! Stop it! Don't think about that!_

But it was too late. At that thought, images of Sam and Gibby, close together their lips pressed together...It made him nauseous.

...

When Saturday rolled around, Freddie woke up to a feeling of utter dread. Sam was going to go on a date with Gibby. They were going to go get dinner and then see a movie and then who knew what else.

Freddie had been steering clear of Gibby and Sam all week; he didn't think he could tolerate it if they started acting all couplish.

He spent most of the day in his room, contemplating whether or not to upload the video of Gibby being chased by a hamster in his boxers on iCarly.

His phone rang around six, and he looked down to see that it was Gibby calling.

"What?" he answered roughly.

"Hey man, I was just getting ready for my dinner with Sam tonight," Gibby said on the other line. "And I was wondering which tie would go better with my salmon shirt. The blue one or the green one?"

"Which ever one you want, I don't care!" Freddie snapped.

"Well!" Gibby huffed. "What's up with _you_?"

"You should know, Gibby!" Freddie said angrily.

"What did I do?"

"You're supposed to be my friend! My bro!" Freddie said. "And you go and ask out my ex-girlfriend?"

"But it's not like you still like Sam or anything," Gibby said. "And it's been months since you two dated."

"I-that's not the point!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Well, I've got to go," Gibby said. "Since _your _no help with my tie crisis."

"Gibby! No! I'm not done yelling at-" but Gibby had already hung up.

"Oh, this video's going up now!" Freddie said, sitting back down at his computer.

A few minutes later, his phone rang again, and Freddie looked down at it and saw that this time it was Carly.

"Yeah?" he asked, answering.

"Hey, do you think you could come over really quickly?" Carly asked. "It's important."

"Um, sure, fine," Freddie sighed. "Give me a minute."

He turned off his laptop and shuffled across the hall and let himself into the Shay's apartment.

"Okay, good, you're here," Carly said. "Sit down. Right there on the couch."

"What's up?" Freddie asked.

"Well, I'm trying to help Sam figure out what to wear," Carly said. "And I need a second opinion...Sam! Get down here!"

Freddie heard footsteps coming down the stairs, and a few seconds later, Sam appeared wearing a white laced tank top and a pair of form-fitting jeans.

_She looks amazing, _Freddie suddenly found himself thinking. _And it's not for you. It's for Gibby..._

"So, I like this outfit," Carly said, nodding at what Sam was wearing now. "_But _I also like this dress..." she picked up a silver dress that had been thrown over the back of the sofa and held it against Sam's body. "Which one do you think is better?"

_So __**this **__is what torture feels like, _Freddie thought to himself. Sam would look stunning in either outfit.

"Come on, Carls," Sam said, taking the dress and throwing back onto the couch. "It's Gibby, not the pope. Although, um, Gibby _is _a great guy and all."

"Well I still think you should get a boy's opinion," Carly said, looking over at Freddie. "So, Freddie? Any thoughts?"

"How should I know?" he said. "When did I become such an expert in fashion all of the sudden?"

"Geesh, what's got your pants in a knot?" Sam asked. "Your mom not put enough bubble bath in the tub for you?"

"No!" Freddie snapped, trying not to look at her in that outfit that showed off every curve of her body.

"Maybe I'll wear this dress if I ever get to go out with Jake Gander," Carly said, looking over the dress.

"Why do you want to go out with him?" Sam asked quickly. "He's a total player, Carls. You know he takes a girl out on one date, makes out with her and then dumps her the next day to move onto someone else."

"But maybe he'll feel a real connection with me and I'll be the girl who ends this stage in his life!" Carly said.

"You can do better than him," Sam told her. "Who knows? Maybe the perfect guy for you is right under your nose. Well, no, not _right _under your nose, I mean, I'm sure he doesn't live near you, but, um, maybe-"

Her phone suddenly dinged and she read her new text message.

"Gibby's mom is here," she said. "Where's my purse?"

"Right over there next to Freddie," Carly said.

Sam quickly reached for her bag, and doing so, she brushed up against Freddie ever so lightly, and for the first time in months, he smelled the vanilla in her hair and felt her soft skin against his. It was enough to make him feel about ten times worse than how he already felt.

"I can't wait to hear how this goes," Carly said as Sam shut the door behind her. "Can you?"

"I'll be right back," Freddie said, jumping up off the sofa, his skin still tingling where Sam had touched it. He hurried through the hallway and caught up to Sam just as she was about to descend down the first flight of stairs.

"Sam!"

She turned around. "What?"

"I-I-Why Gibby?" he exclaimed. "Why would you want to go out with Gibby?"

Sam frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, he's Gibby!" Freddie said. "What can you find even remotely attractive about the guy?"

"Freddie, you don't-"

"You'd make a terrible couple!" Freddie continued. "Despite what Carly seems to think...But you two are just weird together! It's wrong! We-We made more sense than that!"

Sam blinked. "What?"

"Sure, I-I guess we fought a lot," Freddie said, shocked at what had just come out of his mouth. "But, I mean, we weren't _that _bad together, were we? Half the Internet didn't think so, at least..."

"Well, yeah, but-"

"You can't go out with Gibby," Freddie said firmly, feeling a newfound courage cursing through his veins. "And you want to know why?"

"I-" she began, but Freddie cut her off, pressing his lips to her hers.

At first she was surprised, but after a few seconds, she began to kiss Freddie back, lacing her hands around his neck, pulling his closer...

Suddenly the two heard applause. They broke apart, Freddie still with his arms around her, and turned around to see Carly standing at the end off the hall, grinning from ear to ear. "It worked! I knew it would work!"

"Knew what would work?" Freddie frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"Yeah, what are you doing?" Sam asked.

"Well," Carly said, smiling. "I _might've _had this planned for a few weeks now. And it worked! My plan worked!"

"Had _what _planned?" Freddie asked, totally confused. He looked at Sam who looked just as lost as he was.

"Hey, I helped too!" Gibby said, coming around the corner.

"Gibby? What are you doing here?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, you-you-" Freddie said. "I thought you were waiting downstairs for Sam!"

"No, he was never going to take Sam on a date, right Sam?" Carly grinned.

"Right," Sam nodded. "But that still-"

"Wait, you guys weren't going on a date?" Freddie asked.

"No! I thought Gibby would've told you that!" Sam said.

"But he asked you out!"

"Alright, guys!" Carly laughed. "Come on, I'll explain everything to you. Oh! I'm still so glad this all worked out! You guys are a couple again and-wait. You _are_ a couple again, right?" she demanded as she opened up her apartment door and let everyone in. "Because I saw that whole thing. Freddie kissed Sam, Sam kissed back. Freddie clearly liked the kiss, Sam clearly liked the kiss...I'm seeing a couple here, am I right? Huh? Am I? Just say yes already!"

Freddie and Sam looked at each other.

"Do-Do you want to be?" Sam asked softly in a barely audible tone.

"Well, yeah," Freddie nodded, who still felt the sparks from the kiss. "If-If you want to be?"

"Well if you want to be-"

"Okay, yes, you guys are a couple, we got our answer," Carly said quickly.

"I-Can you just _please _tell us what's going on?" Sam frowned.

"Yeah, my head feels like it's going to explode," Freddie nodded.

"Well," Carly said, grinning. "Right around the time when Gibby opened his restaurant-"

"And fulfilled my dreams," Gibby added proudly.

"Er, yeah," Carly frowned. "Anyway, right around then, I began to notice how _desperately _you two wanted to get back together-"

"Desperately?" Sam repeated.

"Yes, desperately," Carly nodded. "But obviously you two were both way too stubborn to be normal and _tell _each other how you were feeling, so I had to step in and do a little...altering."

"How?" Freddie asked.

"I'm getting to that!" Carly snapped. "Well, I talked to Gibby, and he agreed to help me...if I promised to let him bring that talentless duck of his on iCarly after it was all done. So we decided that we would have to break the weakest link in your relationship. Freddie."

"_I'm _the weakest link?" Freddie said indignantly.

"No offense," Carly said. "So we planned for Gibby to ask Sam out in front of Freddie. We knew that he would get jealous, and that's just what we wanted. So when we were all down at the restaurant, I gave Gibby the signal, which was dropping that glass, and he asked Sam out."

"Speaking of which, you still owe me a new glass," Gibby said.

"But we knew that Sam didn't like Gibby 'that way'," Carly continued, ignoring Gibby's comment. "So that's why the day before he asked her out, Gibby had a little conversation with Sam...he told her that he was interested in _me _and that he wanted to make me jealous by going out with another girl. So he asked her if he were to pay her, if she would say yes when he would ask her out in front of me."

"Wait, so you two were never dating?" Freddie asked Sam.

"No way!" Sam cringed. "He's so...Gibby!"

"Thank you," Gibby smiled.

"I knew Sam would agree," Carly said.

"Well yeah, if you were to pay her," Freddie nodded.

"Yeah," Carly grinned. "But that's not the only reason...Gibby had told me that on the day we were looking around the basement, planing out the restaurant-"

"_You _weren't planning," Gibby scoffed. "You were crushing my dreams!"

"Will you let me tell the story? Anyway," Carly said, turning back to Sam and Freddie. "Gibby told me that he found out that Sam thought Freddie had a new little crush on me. That's why I knew she'd agree to help Gibby. She'd want me to get together with anyone, even Gibby, so that Freddie wouldn't be interested in me."

"But I was never interested in you!" Freddie said quickly. He turned to Sam. "I swear, I was telling you the truth when I said that I didn't have a new crush on her."

"Well I know that _now_," Sam said.

"That's why Sam kept saying how great Gibby was whenever I was around," Carly said. "And why she didn't want me going out with Jake. The rest of the plan was easy; just have Gibby text Sam to help him at the restaurant with Billy Boats after I told him that Freddie was around...get Freddie even more jealous by saying that Sam and Gibby would be a cute couple...And we knew tonight, after seeing Sam about to go out on her date with Gibby, Freddie would finally man up." She beamed, absolutely pleased with herself.

"That's-that's genius," Freddie said softly.

"I can't believe you planned this whole thing," Sam said. "And here I was thinking you were so innocent."

"A girl's got to do what a girl's got to do," Carly smiled. "And it worked!"

Freddie grinned at Sam. "Yeah, it did."

"Alright, I've got to go if I'm still going to get that dinner reservation," Gibby said, looking at his watch.

"You're going to eat alone?" Sam frowned.

"No. With my lady," Gibby replied. "I told Tasha to meet me down at the restaurant."

"So you two _didn't _break up then?" Freddie asked.

"Nah, I just told you that," Carly said. "And I told Sam the same thing when she slept over last week."

"You realize you have the master mind of a criminal, right?" Sam asked her best friend. "I'm so proud of you, kid!"


	158. Chapter 158

_Lesser_

"You swear this will come off?" Freddie asked Sam for the third time, frowning as he looked at his forearm, which had a large image of a skunk on it.

"Yes, I told you, it's Henna," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Get over it."

Sam and Freddie had been out in Texas at the big Puckett family reunion, and after spending a whole weekend with nearly two dozen Pucketts, Freddie was very relieved to be on a plane back home to Seattle.

"I still can't believe your aunt gave this to me while I was sleeping," Freddie mumbled.

"You shouldn't have insulted her," Sam shrugged. "How did I insult her?" Freddie frowned. "The only thing I said to her was that her three bean salad was good. That's a compliment!"

"That wasn't three bean salad, Freddie," Sam sighed. "That was her special chile recipe that she learned in therapy."

"Oh," Freddie said, blinking. "Well...still, is that any reason to give me a skunk tattoo? My mom's going to kill me!"

"Well just tell her we shared a hotel room, and she'll forget all about being mad at the tattoo," Sam grinned.

"Please, I think that'd give her a heart attack," Freddie laughed. "I mean, she still isn't exactly happy with us dating,even though its been almost three years!"

"I know, she's crazy," Sam agreed. "Even crazier than my cousin Luke who chased after you with that rake and tried to get you to-"

"I'd like to try and forget that, actually," Freddie said quickly.

"Oh, I got the whole thing on video," Sam laughed. "Trust me; I'm not going to let you forget it."

"People think I make these stories up, you know," Freddie said, shaking his head.

"Whatever, I'm hungry," Sam said.

"What, the five tons at bacon you ate at your grandparents place before we left didn't fill you up?" Freddie asked, rolling his eyes.

"That was for breakfast!"

"It was an hour ago!"

"Exactly!"

"I think I see the food cart coming around now," Freddie told his girlfriend, chuckling lightly.

Sure enough, a moment later a flight attendant stopped by Sam and Freddie's seats and offered them peanuts and small bottles of water.

"Anyway, Sam," Freddie said, tossing his peanut bag onto the tray in front of him. "You have to promise that you won't it slip to my mom that we shared a hotel room on this trip, let alone a bed."

"Dude, we just finished our second year of college," Sam said. "Did she _really_ expect us to go and get separate rooms?"

"Yup," Freddie nodded.

"She really is nuts," Sam said.

"I know," Freddie sighed. "But you know, it wouldn't _kill _you to try and get along with her a little better."

"I do try!" Sam exclaimed.

"Baby, you were about to throw a chicken leg at her last week."

"But I didn't," Sam pointed out. "And I only wanted to because she told me that my sneakers were the filthiest thing she'd ever seen! See, my family didn't do any of that stuff to you this weekend, did they?"

"Um, again, I woke up with a skunk on my arm," Freddie reminded her.

"Okay, other than that," Sam said quickly. "And anyway, we already decided you deserved that."

"Plus, your Uncle Jimmy kept asking you what you saw in me when I was sitting right next to you!"

"He was curious, he liked you," Sam said.

"He said it looked like his five year-old grandson could beat me up!"

"Well, that kid's pretty tough," Sam shrugged. "Nearly as tough as I was when I was his age..."

"And your cousin Ricky-"

"Okay, okay, I get it," Sam said. "But you don't have to deal with those guys back at home. I have to deal with your mom all the time!"

"Yeah, that's true," Freddie nodded. "And I guess for having to see her nearly everyday, you _do _keep your cool surprisingly well."

"Thank you," Sam said, satisfied.

"Well, at least my mom won't be home when we land," Freddie said, opening his bag of peanuts. "She's still down visiting her sister. She apparently got her wart back again..."

"You have a _real_ attractive family," Sam said, chuckling. She opened her own bag of peanuts.

"I know, sometimes I wonder how I turned out all right," Freddie said.

"Well, I wouldn't say you're completely problem free," Sam frowned, looking down at her peanuts. "Hey, how come you have more in your bag than mine?"

"I dunno," Freddie shrugged, popping a few peanuts into his mouth.

"Trade with me," Sam said, grabbing her boyfriend's bag and stuffing her own into his hand.

"Hey!" Freddie exclaimed. "Give those back!"

"No way, I already told you, I'm hungry!" Sam said.

"So? Eat your own bag of peanuts then!"

"I told you, my bag is smaller than yours!" Sam said. "Come on, you're going to make your girlfriend starve?"

"Well maybe if you asked _nicely_, I would've traded with you," Freddie told her. "You promised after that steakhouse incident, that you'd at least _ask _before swiping food out of my possession, and-"

"Look, boyfriends are always supposed to make sure that their girlfriends never have lesser food than them," Sam said.

"Less."

"What?"

"You should've said 'Boyfriends are always supposed to make sure that their girlfriends never have _less_ food than them,'" Freddie said.

"You are _not _giving me a grammar lesson on this plane," Sam said, narrowing her eyes.

"I just thought you'd like to know that you made a grammatical error," Freddie said. "See, now that I told you, you'll never make that mistake again!"

"Do I need to push you out of the plane?" Sam frowned. "Again."

"There are no parachutes on this plane, like there were on the one to Japan," Freddie pointed out.

Sam rose an eyebrow. "Who said you got a parachute?"

"You wouldn't push me out of the plan," Freddie grinned. "Would you, Sam?"

"How much you want to bet I would?" Sam asked.

"Sam..." Freddie said, still smiling.

"Fine, no, I wouldn't," Sam snapped.

"I knew it," Freddie laughed. "You love me too much, don't you?"

"Shut up."

"Aw, see, you _do _love me," Freddie said, putting his arm around Sam. "And I love you too, Sam."

"Well then can I have your peanuts?" Sam asked.

"Yes, you can," Freddie nodded, leaning closer to her to kiss her.

"Um, excuse me," the flight attendant said, walking over to Sam and Freddie's seats. "We're going to have to ask you to keep it down...we've had some complaints."


	159. Chapter 159

**AN-This oneshot is a sequel to chapter 148, Iron, where Sam and Freddie were getting ready to move to Chicago and Sam told the gang that her and Freddie were expecting a baby. **

**...**

_Member_

"So how's Chicago?" Carly asked Sam over the phone.

"Carly, we've been here less than a week," Sam reminded her best friend. "We're not even unpacked yet."

"Well how's the house?"

"It's in the middle of suburbia," Sam said. "How do you think it is?"

"You don't like it?"

"Well, the house is great," Sam explained. "It's huge. Plus the pool's awesome, but the people, Carls...Do you know that since we moved in, we've been asked to join the neighborhood watch, the Potluck committee, the gardening organization _and _street fair planing group!"

"Those could be fun," Carly reasoned.

"And then they asked me and Freddie to become members of this early morning jog club," Sam said darkly. "You realize these people wake up _before six in the morning_ to run around the neighborhood? That's waking up early _and _exercise! It's like the universe decided to put together the two things I hate the most!"

"Well at least the people seem friendly," Carly chuckled.

"Overly friendly, Carly," Sam pointed out. "These are your type of people. You sure you don't want to move to Chicago?"

"I wish," Carly said.

"And you'll never guess who lives right next door to us," Sam said.

"Who?"

"A family of cops! The husband and wife and their two sons who sill live at home are all cops!"

"But that means your neighborhood's well protected."

"It means I can't play with my firecrackers," Sam mumbled.

"Well, I'm sure it's better for the baby to grow up in the suburbs," Carly said. "It's safer and cleaner and-"

"Stupider," Sam said.

"You can always move back to Seattle," Carly said hopefully.

"Sorry kid," Sam sighed. "It's too late for that. Besides, even though I'm surrounded by freaks here, my job's awesome! I get to do all the choreography for the theatre's next play!"

"That's so awesome! Maybe we'll be able to see it when we come and visit you in a few months," Carly said.

"That'd be cool," Sam agreed. "I could totally hook you up with some tickets."

"I can't wait," Carly said. "So, um, have you met any potential new best friends yet?"

"Carly for the last time, I'm not replacing you," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"I'm just checking," Carly chuckled. "And don't worry, I'm not replacing you either."

"You'd better not be," Sam said. "Hey, I think I just heard Freddie come in, and he picked up some fried chicken. I'll talk to you later, okay?"

"Alright, see you."

Sam hung up her phone. "Baby? You get the chicken?"

"Um, yeah," Freddie nodded coming into the living room. "Hey, you look really pretty today, you know that?"

"Thanks?" Sam frowned. "So where's my chicken?"

"I put it on the kitchen table," Freddie said quickly. "So, Sam, you'll-you'll never guess who I ran into at the chicken place?"

"Who?" Sam asked, heading into the kitchen.

"Don't get mad," Freddie started, following his wife. "But it's your-"

"Oh my God! Sam! I've missed you so much!"

Before Sam had time to register what was happening, she found herself locked in a tight hug.

"Melanie?" Sam exclaimed pulling out of the hug.

"Yeah! I can't believe this!" Melanie grinned happily. "Isn't it so lucky that I just happened to be picking up dinner for some friends at the same time Freddie was at the restaurant?"

"Yeah, lucky," Sam nodded, shooting her husband a death glare over her sister's shoulder. "So, um, what-what are you doing here? I thought you were still living in New York. You didn't move here did you? Did you?"

"No, I'm just here on a business trip with some co-workers," Melanie smiled. "But when I saw Freddie and he told me you two had just moved here, I _had _to stop by and say hi to you!"

"Of course you did," Sam said, still glaring at Freddie.

"He told me you got a new job choreographing at the theatre," Melanie continued. "That's so great! I always knew you'd wind up doing something with dance! _And_," her smile widened even more. "Freddie told me some _other _big piece of news! You're pregnant?"

"Um, yeah," Sam nodded. "A little over two months along."

"Oh, that's so wonderful!" she squealed, pulling her sister into another hug. "Are you excited? Well, that's a stupid question, of course you are! Have you begun shopping yet? There's so much you'll have to prepare for! Crib, clothes, toys...we'll have to go to Kiddie's We Are before I leave so we can get some cute stuff!"

"Oh, we don't have to-"

"Of course we have to!" Melanie said. "And Sam, don't worry, I'm going to help you out with this baby. Sure, it will be hard with me living in New York and all, but I'll make it work. I can come down on holidays, and I'll send presents, _and_, well, there's been a rumor around my office that my company's looking to put a few people in their Chicago office...maybe I could volunteer to be one of them! Oh, I'll make sure I'm going to be the best aunt ever!"

"Well that sounds great!" Freddie said quickly before Sam could say anything. "Why don't we eat? I, um, invited Melanie to dinner, so let's start on this chicken before it gets cold!"

"Can I use your bathroom real quick first?" Melanie asked.

"Yeah, it's right down the hall," Freddie told her.

Once Melanie was out of the kitchen, Sam punched her husband hard in the shoulder. "Why did you bring her here?"

"Ow!" Freddie winced, rubbing his shoulder. "Look, Sam, what was I supposed to do? She saw me at the restaurant and she started talking to me."

"So you had to invite her to dinner?"

"Well I thought it would be rude not to," Freddie said.

"And you had to tell her I was pregnant?"

"Sam, she's your sister," Freddie said. "When were you planning on telling her? Seven months from now when the baby's here?"

"Freddie, you know she drives me nuts," Sam sighed.

"She's not that bad," Freddie reasoned. "She really wants to get closer to you, from what she was saying. I mean, when was the last time you talked to her?"

"At our wedding," Sam mumbled.

"Exactly," Freddie nodded. "Sam, I'm an only child, so I may not exactly get this whole sibling thing, but I do know that deep down you love Melanie."

Sam didn't reply.

"She's only here until the end of the week," Freddie told her gently. "You can tough it out until then, can't you?"

"I guess," Sam sighed.

"Good," Freddie smiled, giving her a quick kiss. "And, um, I sort of might've also told her she could stay here until her business trip was over."

"Freddie!"

...

**AN-Just so everyone knows, there's already been a request to do another follow up to this oneshot. Well, it's not exactly a sequel to this, but it's another oneshot based off of the whole Sam and Freddie in Chicago story line, and it's going to be up tomorrow! **


	160. Chapter 160

_Cookie_

"Spencer, Sam said you make a right up here!" Carly said as her brother zoomed past the turn.

"You said a left!" Spencer exclaimed.

"I did not!"

"I definitely heard left," Gibby said from the back seat.

"Me too," T-Bo nodded.

"You guys all need to get your ears checked," Carly mumbled.

"Man, this is not at all what I thought Chicago would be like," Gibby said, looking out the window. "I thought it was supposed to be one of those really busy city places."

"It is," Carly said. "But these are the suburbs."

"I have not seen one decent smoothie shop in this whole dang city," T-Bo commented. "Where's a man supposed to get a decent drink?"

"Freddie was telling me that there's a pretty nice juice bar near their house," Spencer said.

"A juice bar?" T-Bo frowned. "_That's _what this country is coming to? I _knew _I should've run for president, I could've fixed all this chiz! _Why'd _my mama have to go into labor in Canada?"

"While I'm sure the problem on every American's mind is smoothies," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Can we please focus on the fact that Spencer needs to go turn around! I told you, you missed the turn!"

"I missed it because you told me the wrong directions!" Spencer argued.

"No I didn't!"

"You know, _you're _driving on the way back home," Spencer said, making a U-turn. "And then I'll be the one screaming faulty directions at you and we'll see how you-"

"Turn! Now!"

Spencer turned onto a long street of houses.

"Hey, look, joggers!" Gibby said, pointing at three men wearing matching red jumpsuits. "Wow, look at those sweet suits. You think I can get one of those and go with those guys while we're staying here?"

"You do whatever you like," Carly said. "Oh! Look, that's their house!"

Spencer pulled into the driveway and parked the car as all the passengers jumped out. No sooner had they stepped out, though, did the front door of the house swing open.

"Sam!" Carly exclaimed, running over to her friend. "Oh my God! I can't believe it's been like, seven months since I've seen you!"

"I know!" Sam grinned as Carly threw her arms around her.

"Wow, you're so big!" Carly said, letting go of her best friend and noticing her largely swollen abdomen. "But not like, fat big," she added quickly. "Pregnant big."

"Thanks," Sam laughed.

"Wow, you're really nine months along now?" Spencer asked, giving Sam a hug as well.

"Yup, due date's in three days," Sam nodded. "Hey, Teebs, Gib."

"Hey," Gibby said. "Listen, do you know how I can get me one of those nice jogging suits?"

"More importantly," T-Bo cut in. "Why does this place have a _juice bar _instead of a smoothie joint?"

"And this is what I've been dealing with for the past twenty seven hours in the car," Carly sighed.

"I feel for you kid," Sam said. "Anyway, come on, it's like ten degrees out here. I _hate _Chicago weather..."

She led the four into the house. "Freddie's still at work," she said as they all gathered in the living room. "But he'll be home in a little bit. I'll show you your rooms, but first...you got the stuff?"

"Yup," Spencer said, opening one of his bags. He pulled out a large box. "Fat Cookies. From the fine people who brought you Fat Cakes."

"Give them!" Sam said, ripping open the box at once. She stuffed one in her mouth. "Oh. My. God. That was the single best thing I've tasted in my life."

"It's kind of funny how they start selling these only in Washington three months after you move," Gibby chuckled.

"Yeah, real hilarious," Sam said darkly.

"Maybe it's a sign that you and Freddie should move back to Seattle," Carly said.

"I was on the verge of doing that, just to get my hands on these," Sam said. "But Freddie wouldn't go for it..."

"So, did you guys set up the nursery for Baby Benson yet?" Spencer asked. "Wait until you see the sculpture I brought for it! It's in the back of the car, but I need Freddie to help me bring it in."

"Awesome, I can't wait to see it," Sam said. "Anyway, I'll show you the nursery now. We just finished setting up everything last night. My friend Penny from work came by and helped us put up this cool wallpaper she found at her sister's store. It has dancing ice cream cones on it!"

"Hey, I had a dream about those last year!" Gibby said. "And when i woke up, for some reason I was covered in ice cream..."

"Yeah, that would be from me," Sam said as she started up the stairs. "I got bored."

"Interesting," Carly said. "So...Penny. She sounds...nice."

"She is," Sam nodded. "She makes the costumes for the theatre I work for."

"Uh-huh...So you spend a lot of time with her?"

"Carly, she's not my best friend," Sam said. "That's still you."

"I know, I know," Carly said. "But, um, do-do you have fun with her?"

"Not nearly as much fun as with you," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Good," Carly said satisfied.

"Alright, here's the nursery," Sam said, opening a door right next to the stairs. It was painted a light blue with the wallpaper Sam had just described plastered all around. There was a small camping bed set up by the crib.

"Freddie and I decided that we want the baby to sleep in the bassinet in our room for the first few weeks," Sam said. "So you'll be staying in here, Carls."

"Cool," Carly grinned. "I get to be surrounded by all the little baby stuff!"

"And then T-Bo and Gibby will share the guest room down the hall," Sam continued. "And Freddie set up a bed for Spencer in the office."

"Ha ha, I get my own room!" Spencer said to T-Bo and Gibby.

"Just beware, Freddie swore he saw a mouse in there this morning," Sam told him.

"What? How come _I _have to sleep all by myself?"

"So, what do you think of the house?" Sam asked everyone as they headed downstairs.

"It's so nice," Carly said. "Perfect for starting a family...I just wish it wasn't so dang far away! I'm never going to get to see my godchild!"

"Carls, you guys are staying here for two weeks," Sam said. "You'll be here when the baby's born, you'll get to see your godchild!"

"I know," Carly sighed. "But I'm still not used to not having you barging into my house everyday."

"Yeah, it's so weird," Spencer agreed. "I wake up in the morning and the living room's...empty."

"Well we'll be driving up to Seattle in a couple of months," Sam reminded them. "To show Freddie's mom and my mom the baby. I promise, we'll barge into the apartment and eat all of your food without asking just like old times."

"Okay, good," Spencer said, relieved.

Just then, they heard the front door open and Freddie entered the house.

"Freddie!" Carly exclaimed, rushing over to him and giving him a hug.

"Hey, Carls," Freddie laughed, returning the hug. "Long time no see, huh?"

"Get off him, it's my turn!" Gibby said, pushing Freddie off him and pulling Freddie into another hug.

"Um, hey there, Gib," Freddie said as Gibby continued to crush him. "Sort of can't breathe hear..."

"Oh, sorry."

"They just got here about half an hour ago," Sam said as Freddie gave his wife a short kiss. "I was just showing them the house."

"I left work as early as I could," Freddie said, giving Spencer and T-Bo quick one armed hugs. "Hey, are those the new Fat Cookies Sam's been going on about?"

"Oh, yeah, we brought her a bunch," Spencer nodded.

"Are they any good?"

"They're like eating heaven," Sam said.

"Wow, mind if I try one?" Freddie asked, reaching for the box.

"You touch my Fat Cookies, Benson, and I _will _get rid of your train documentaries."

"Okay, okay," Freddie chuckled. "Hey, so since you guys all just got in, why don't we head out and get some dinner?"

"Not at that jank juice bar I've been hearing about," T-Bo said. "Seriously, what decent man goes to a juice bar?"

"Well they _do _have smoothies there," Freddie told him.

"Oh, well that's just messed up," T-Bo said, shaking his head. "You've got the people all confused..."

"Come on, there's a really great pizza place nearby," Sam said, grabbing her jacket. "I mean, all those rumors you hear about Chicago pizza are true. It's ten times better than anything you can find in Seattle."

"Of course, I haven't even gotten a chance to finish a slice," Freddie said. "Because _someone_ always winds up swiping mine!"

"Baby, if you're going to take twenty minutes to season your pizza, you can't be surprised when I take if from you," Sam said. "Besides, I'm eating for two! Don't you want your kid to be well fed?"

"What are you going to do when you can't use that excuse to steal my food anymore?" Freddie asked.

"Since when do I need an excuse to steal your food?"

"At least we know Chicago hasn't changed you two," Carly chuckled, interrupting the couples argument.

"Nope," Sam grinned as Freddie put his arm around her. "Now come on, I'm starving!"

"Can we stop by this stupid juice bar first?" T-Bo asked as the party headed out to the car. "I need to give these people a piece of my mind..."


	161. Chapter 161

**AN-So this oneshot takes place when the iCarly gang was younger. Hope you enjoy!**

**...**

_Ought_

Eight-year old Freddie Benson sat at his table in his third grade classroom, happily working on his subtraction problems.

Math was a breeze for him. Well, so was pretty much every other subject in school. Except for the non-academic subjects he had to take part in, such as art and P.E. He had absolutely no creativity, so art wasn't exactly his forte, and as far as P.E. went...well, to put it simply, he was very close to going to his mother to ask her write a note to get him out of P.E. for the rest of the year.

"Hey," a voice next to him said. "Let me see your paper."

"No, Samantha!" Freddie said firmly to the blonde girl who shared his table. "That's cheating!"

"Only if we get caught," she pointed out. "And for the billionth time, don't call me Samantha!" She gave him a hard punch in the shoulder. "My name's _Sam_."

"Ow!" Freddie hissed.

"Sam!" the other girl at the table, this one with long, dark hair, whispered frantically. "Ms. Jones said no hitting anybody! You don't want to have to sit out at recess!"

"Yeah, listen to Carly!" Freddie nodded. He turned to Carly. "I wish _you _were sitting next to me, instead of across from me. _You'd_ never be mean to me like _she _is."

Sam stuck her tongue out at him and proceeded to reach over and grab his pencil out of his hand and went back to working on her subtraction sheet.

Freddie's mom had moved him to Seattle about six months ago so that she could start her new job as a nurse at the nearby hospital. At first, he had been a bit skeptical about this, especially after he walked into the new building where they would be living and he came face to face with the scary doorman, who had been screaming at a bottle of water at the time. But when his mother led him up to the eighth floor to where their apartment was located, Carly had come out of the apartment across from his and introduced herself right away.

_Flashback_

"_Hi!" Carly said brightly to the scared looking Freddie, who was tightly clutching his _Galaxy Wars_ knapsack. "You must be our new neighbors! I'm Carly!" _

"_Um, hi," Freddie said, staring at this girl who looked so...beautiful to him. Even though he was at the age where most boys thought girls had cooties, he knew this girl couldn't possibly have any. She was too...perfect. "I'm Freddie Benson. So, you and your parents live across from us?" _

"_No, just my brother and me," she explained. "But he's a grown up, sort of, so it's okay. He's taking care of me while my dad does work for the military." _

"_Wow, neat, I wish I had a brother," Freddie said. "I just live with my mom." _

"_Do you maybe want to come over?" Carly asked. "My brother's going to make tacos for lunch. Or spaghetti. He can never pick between those two..." _

"_Yeah, that sounds fun," Freddie nodded. "Let me just go ask my-"_

"_Carly, come on, it's your turn in Go Fish," a girls voice called from inside the apartment, and a moment later a girl that appeared to be around his age appeared next to Carly. Sam Puckett._

"_Freddie, this is my friend Sam," Carly said. "Sam, Freddie's going to be my new neighbor, isn't that cool?" _

"_Not really," Sam shrugged. She looked at Freddie and crossed her arms. "Your backpack is stupid. _Galaxy Wars _is only for nubs." _

"_It's my favorite movie!" Freddie defended. _

"_Well then you're a nub," Sam said simply. _

"_What's a nub?" Freddie frowned. _

"_A dumb person," Sam grinned. _

_Freddie gasped. "You said a bad word! My mom says only bad people say bad words!" _

_Sam took a step closer to Freddie. "I'm not bad! Take that back or I'll pound you in the face!" _

"_Sam, don't hit him!" Carly said. _

"_But-But girls can't beat boys up!" Freddie stuttered, though this girl was looking quite intimidating. _

"_Oh yeah?" Sam pushed him down, hard, and smiled down at him, satisfied. _

"_So-So do you want to come play Go Fish with us?" Carly asked quickly. _

"_Not if __**she's **__going to be there!" Freddie said firmly, crossing his arms. "She's a-a-mean person!" _

"_Good, I don't want you to play with us," Sam said. "Come on, Carly." _

_End Flashback_

Carly had knocked on his door later that day and apologized for the whole incident, and of course, Freddie forgave her. Unfortunately, though, if he wanted to be friends with Carly, he had to put up with Sam. He shuddered just thinking about her. Sam Puckett was one girl who he knew was definitely covered in cooties.

"Ten minus four," Sam mumbled to herself, trying to work the problem out on her fingers.

"Only babies have to use their fingers," Freddie chuckled.

Sam glared at him, but luckily, before she could make Freddie pay for that comment, their teacher, Ms. Jones, walked over to their table.

"Okay, Sam, the front office just called," she said. "You're leaving early."

"Good," Sam smiled, jamming her papers messily into her backpack. She stood up and turned to Freddie.

"I'm going to get you for that fingers thing tomorrow at recess!" she whispered.

Freddie gulped.

"Bye, Carly!" Sam said, swinging her bag over her shoulder.

"Bye!" Carly smiled.

Freddie watched as Sam left the classroom. "How come she leaves school early all of the time?" he frowned. "She left early yesterday. _And_ on Monday."

"She says she goes and visits her uncles and aunts and cousins in prison," Carly said.

"She can't be going all the time," Freddie pointed out, finishing his subtraction page and beginning his addition one.

"Sam doesn't lie," Carly assured him.

"Yeah, right," Freddie said.

...

The next day before school the third graders were playing on the playground until the first bell rang.

Freddie had gone to school with Carly this morning, since his mother got called in to work a morning shift at the hospital (she had wasted twenty minutes showing Spencer a pamphlet of safe driving techniques before she finally left).

"I can't wait to show Sam my new _Girly Cow_ shirt," Carly said, sliding down the slide. "Oh, look! Here she comes now!"

Freddie looked over and saw Sam hop out of a beaten up blue mini-van and run over to the playground.

"Wow, cool shirt, Carly!" she grinned.

"Thanks," Carly said.

"And that," Sam said, kicking Freddie in the shin, causing him to cry out in pain. "Is for yesterday."

"You promised me you wouldn't hurt him anymore," Carly sighed.

"I'll start tomorrow...maybe."

"So," Freddie said, getting back to his feet. "Where'd you go yesterday?"

"Um, the doctor," Sam said quickly.

"But Carly said you go see your family in prison when you leave school early!" Freddie said triumphantly.

"Well yesterday I was sick," Sam said. "So I couldn't."

"Either that or you're lying," Freddie mumbled.

"Hey! I don't lie!" Sam exclaimed.

"I told him that!" Carly said.

"But-But you leave school early all the time," Freddie argued. "You can't have so many relatives in prison that you have to visit them that often!"

"I have plenty of relatives in prison, Fredbutt," Sam snapped.

Just then the bell rang and the students on the playground began to file into the school.

All day long, Freddie continued to badger Sam with questions about her whereabouts the previous day and the other days before that, and Sam continued to ignore him. Or rather, she ignored him the first few times, but eventually, around snack time, he began to get on her nerves, so she dumped him milk onto this lap, causing the other kids in the class to laugh at him.

Finally, after a long day, the final bell rang, dismissing the students.

Freddie stayed back in the classroom to help Ms. Jones stack the chairs as he always did, something which his mother encouraged, assuming he did not lift any chair more than five pounds, but Sam took as an excuse to call him a teacher's pet daily.

By the time Freddie had finished helping Ms. Jones, most of the students had already been picked up. In fact, the only people left on the playground were Sam and another blonde girl from the other third grade class. She was sitting next to Sam by the fence where parents dropped off and picked up their children, talking to her happily, though Sam seemed to be more interested in trying to catch the lizard basking in the sand.

As Freddie walked over to the girls, Freddie recognized this girl to be Leanne (he couldn't remember her last name).

"-And so I'm thinking of wearing the pink dress for the interview portion," Leanne was saying to Sam as Sam made a grab for the lizard. "And maybe the blue one for the talent portion. What about you?"

"I dunno," Sam mumbled, looking after the lizard that had scuttered through her fingers and into the nearby bushes.

"I _loved_ the dress you wore yesterday, it was adorable!" Leanne said. She looked over at Freddie, who had been standing awkwardly behind the girls. "Oh, hi!"

"Gross, it's Fredbert," Sam said, narrowing her eyes.

"Well hi Fredbert!" Leanne said brightly. "I'm Leanne. Nice to meet you!"

"It's not-" Freddie began, but before Freddie could correct her, a shiny red convertible pulled up by the playground and Leanne quickly stood up.

"Well, that's my ride!" she said brightly. She bent down and gave Sam a hug, which Sam seemed to hate greatly, judging by the look on her face. "I'll see you on Saturday, Samantha! And hopefully I'll see you around tomorrow at recess, Fredbert!"

"I can't wait until she moves to Olympia," Sam mumbled as the girl ran off towards her car.

"I didn't know you were friends with her," Freddie said, taking Leanne's spot next to Sam.

"I'm not!" Sam said. "She just thinks we are, even though I've told her a million times that she's a freak."

"Why are you going to see her Saturday then?"

"That's none of your beeswax," Sam told him.

"But she said something about yesterday," Freddie said. "I thought you were at the doctors yesterday."

"I was."

"But she said you were wearing a dress!"

"I-I like to get dressed up for the doctor," Sam said quickly.

"You're just telling lies," Freddie told her. "And my mom says-"

"You're mom's a weirdo," Sam cut him off. "And I _told _you, stop bugging me about where I was yesterday!"

"I will, when you stop lying about it," Freddie said.

"You really ought to learn to mind your own business, Fredloser," Sam snapped.

"And _you _ought to learn to be nicer, Sam...Jerk."

"You can't even insult people," Sam laughed.

"Why won't you just tell me and Carly where you go when you leave class early?" Freddie asked.

"Fine," Sam sighed. "I'll tell you. But you can't tell anyone, swear?"

"I swear," Freddie nodded.

"Okay," Sam said. "I'm a member of the CIA."

"You are not!"

"How do you know?" Sam asked.

"Because you can't be! You're only eight!"

"Fine, I'm actually a celebrity, and every day after school, I put on a wig and sing at concerts and star in movies," Sam grinned.

"Now that's just dumb," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"I thought you said dumb was a bad word?"

"Are you ever going to tell me the truth?" Freddie asked.

"Hmmm," Sam said thoughtfully. "Nope!"

"Not even in a year?"

"Nope."

"What about in five?"

"Not a chance."

"Seven?"

"First of all," Sam said. "I'm not even going to know you anymore in seven years. Once Carly finally realizes what a nub you are, she'll stop talking to you, and then I won't be stuck with you anymore. And second of all, I still wouldn't tell you!"

Freddie was about to open his mouth the protest, when his mom walked over to the playground.

"There you are, Freddikins!" she said. "I'm so sorry I'm late! There was a long line at the ointment store, but I picked you up some nice cream for that rash of yours!"

"Mom!" Freddie hissed as Sam laughed.

"Oh...hello," Marissa said, frowning at Sam. It was clear that she disapproved of this dirty girl with her long blonde hair in tangles and stains smeared all over her jeans being in such close proximity to her darling son. "Come on now, Freddie, dear. I have some disinfectant spray in the car..."

Just as Marissa began pulling Freddie towards her car, Sam's mom pulled up and came to a screeching halt next to the playground. ,

"Yo! Sammy!" a woman who must've been Sam's mom called. "Come on! I have that appointment at my lady doctor in ten minutes!"

Marissa was so busy looking absolutely disgusted at the sight of Pam Puckett's appearance that she didn't even notice her son turn back to Sam.

"So you're really not going to tell me?" he asked.

"If you insist," Sam sighed, picking up her backpack. "I compete in beauty pageants. That's why I get picked up early."

Freddie groaned in frustration. "Fine, don't tell me the truth, see if I care!"

Sam grinned as she turned to run towards her mother's car.

"Oh, that child must be crawling with germs," Marissa shuddered, pulling Freddie more forcefully to the car as Sam's mom drove off. "Come on, Freddie. I'm going to have to go to the store and pick up another bottle of disinfectant. One bottle simply won't get you clean of all the bacteria you must've picked up from that girl!"

Freddie watched as Sam's car disappeared out of the parking lot.

Sam Puckett was really something else. He wondered if ever would find out what Sam was up to when she left school early. Probably not.

_Beauty Pageants, _he scoffed to himself as his mother buckled him in tightly in his booster seat that she insisted on still having him use. _As if Sam Puckett could ever be in a beauty pageant._

**...**

**AN-So I hope I got the ages right. I know Sam and Carly met when they were around eight, so I figure that could've been around the end of second grade or the beginning of third (going off the ages we enter grades where I am from) and I know Sam got a seven year ban that ended when she was fifteen, meaning she would've been eight when she got the ban.**


	162. Chapter 162

**Well...I don't know if everyone's heard the news...It sort of broke my heart. I'm sure many of you know, judging my twitter, but for those of you who don't...**

**Today they finally released information about Jennette McCurdy's new show. Instead of being a completely new character, she's going to continue playing Sam Puckett. The show is also going to star Ariana Grande (Cat from Victorious), and she will be playing Cat there too. The show's going to be about how those two girls start a baby sitting business and they'll be dealing with a bunch of wacky kids. **

**Now when I first read this, I was so excited. I was so happy they finally told us what Jennette's show was going to be about and that it was also going to star Arianna Grande PLUS Noah Munk, who would obviously be playing Gibby. But then, as the information sunk in, I realized that Sam was going to be doing all of this without Freddie, meaning that Freddie had probably gone off to some far away college...**

**I don't know exactly what this means, but I've been on twitter a lot, reading what everyone thinks, and, unfortunately, everyone seems to think that this means Dan is confirming that Seddie will not happen at the end of iCarly, if this new show of his is going to be focusing on just Sam. **

**For me, the only thing that has been comforting me about iCarly ending in November was the fact that Sam and Freddie were BOUND to get together in the finale! But now, seeing as this last iCarly really isn't the finally for Sam, just Freddie and Carly, that fact's looking a bit hazy now...**

**BUT...I refuse to give up hope, and I think that the rest of the seddie shippers should continue holding on until the end as well! I mean, you never know. I know many people are now beginning to speculate that when iCarly ends, it will be the three of them going off on their separate ways with no pairing or it will wind up being a Creddie ending (again, hold on to hope, Seddie shippers!), but Dan's famous for throwing us surprises. I mean, there's always the possibility that Sam and Freddie DO wind up together, and decided that since Freddie's going off to college far away and Sam's apparently going to be starting a baby sitting business to do a long distance relationship or something. Nathan Kress seems to be very friendly with Dan, so maybe Dan can get Nathan to guest star as Freddie and appear once in a while on the show. **

**Still, even with all of this, I'm very happy that Jennette McCurdy will be getting her own show, but I'm going to hold onto Seddie until the end!**


	163. Chapter 163

**AN-This is another plane oneshot, but this one includes everyone!**

**...**

_Perspective_

"I still can't believe you ate twelve soft pretzels while we waited to board," Carly said to Sam as the girls, plus Gibby, Spencer, T-Bo and Freddie, walked through the aisle on the plane, looking for their seats.

"Well I was hungry!" Sam defended.

"But poor Freddie spent like thirty bucks buying them for you," Carly pointed out.

"He doesn't mind, do you baby?" Sam asked her boyfriend.

"Nope," Freddie grinned. "Anything for my very hot girlfriend."

"Okay, keep it moving you two, I don't need to start feeling nauseous before we even take off," Spencer said.

"Yeah, no PDA!" Gibby said firmly. "It was bad enough sitting next to you two on the cab ride over here..." he gave shudder.

"Well, that smoothie convention was a bust," T-Bo mumbled. "I can't believe everyone rejected my ideas!"

"Well we told you to just bring your normal ideas," Carly reminded him. "You know, like that pineapple mango one, or the blueberry kiwi splash. No one's going to want to drink a barbecue chicken smoothie or a sour cream and onion one!"

"I don't know, that chicken one sounds promising," Sam said.

"Thank you," T-Bo said. "See, this girl has taste buds!"

"I think these are our seats here," Carly said, stopping in front of two rows of seats with three seats in each row. "Okay, according to out tickets, Sam, you're by the window, I'm next to you, and Gibby's next to me in this first row, and then Freddie, Spencer and T-Bo are behind us."

"I hate airplanes," Gibby said as everyone began to take their seats.

"Why?" Freddie frowned.

"Because I used to have this little toy plane when I was a kid," Gibby explained. "But then I swallowed it, and I had to go to the hospital and get surgery!"

"That's stupid!" Sam snapped.

"My therapist said it's an understandable phobia!"

"Yeah, the same therapist who told you acting like a mime for a week was good for your self-esteem," Sam said.

"Sam, be nice to him," Freddie said, sitting down behind her.

"I can't help it! He's such a mess!"

"I feel my stomach churning already," Spencer moaned. "Don't they give you motion sickness bags on these things any more?"

"Dude! That's gross!" T-Bo cringed. "Have some class!"

"He always gets sick on planes," Carly sighed. "One time when I was younger, we went out to Alaska to visit out dad, and got so sick he puked on the lady sitting next to him."

"Gee thanks for that," Freddie said, looking less than pleased at his seating arrangement.

"I thought you promised never to speak about that again!" Spencer hissed.

"Was the lady hot?" Gibby asked.

"Smoking," Spencer sighed.

"But you didn't get sick when we were on that plane to Japan," Sam pointed out.

"Well yeah, that's because I found out that possums calm me," Spencer explained. "Which is why I wanted to bring that stuffed possum with me onto the plane, but the mean men at security took him away!"

"Probably because you were talking to it," Freddie said. "They must've thought it was some furry communication device."

"Attention passengers, please buckle your seat belts. We will be taking off for our trip to Seattle in a moment. Thank you," came a voice over the loudspeakers.

"Good, we're going to be taking off soon," Sam said, leaning back in her seat, reclining it all the way back.

"Ow! Sam, that's crushing my legs!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Deal with," Sam said. "I'm tired, and this is comfortable."

"You don't have to lean your seat back so far that it crushes me!" Freddie argued. He kicked the back of her seat.

"Stop it!" Sam snapped, sitting up and turning around to thumping her boyfriend on the top of his head.

"Hey!"

"Are you guys serious?" Carly sighed, frustrated. "How did you go from lovey-dovey, pretzel buying couple to cranky fighting couple?"

"She started it," Freddie mumbled.

"That's it," Carly said firmly as the plane began to move down the runway. "As soon as we're in the air, one of you two is swapping seats!"

"We wanted to do that," Sam said. "But you wouldn't let us!"

"Oh no, you two aren't going to be sitting right next to each other either," Carly told her.

"Why not? You just said-"

"Because we don't want to see the two of you making out the whole way home!" T-Bo said loudly.

"Excuse me," a lady with a small toddler in the row next to the group said. "My son just fell asleep. Would you mind keeping it down, please?"

"Sorry," Carly said.

"Hey, m'am, can I ask you a question?" T-Bo said.

"Um, okay?" the lady frowned.

"Are you a fan of barbecue chicken?"

"Er, sure."

"Well wouldn't you enjoy those delicious flavors blended up in a smoothie?" T-Bo asked her.

"What?"

"Just ignore him," Spencer said to the lady. "Wow, I can't help noticing that you're _very _pretty. Your husband must be a lucky guy."

"Oh, I'm single," the lady smiled at him.

"Really?" Spencer grinned, leaning over T-Bo, holding out a hand to the lady. "Well I'm Spencer Shay."

"Angela," the lady replied shaking his hand.

"Ow! Watch it, Shay!" T-Bo yelled. "Your elbow's somewhere it shouldn't be!"

"Okay, we're in the air now," Carly said, looking out the window, seeing the many clouds rolling by the window. "Time to switch some seats around before Sam and Freddie give everyone on this plane a headache."

"Then just let us sit next to each other and-"

"I told you, Freddie, that's not happening!" Carly said. "Okay, Freddie, switch seats with T-Bo and-"

"I'll switch with T-Bo!" Spencer said, eager to be sitting closer to Angela, who he had just begun telling all about his foreign sock collection. "Up you go, Teebs."

"No way, I'm not gonna be stuck in the middle!"

"Alright, fine, Freddie, you go in the middle, T-Bo, take the window," Carly conceded, rolling her eyes.

"Hey, I want to sit next to Freddie," Gibby said, looking up from his pearphone.

"Why?" Carly asked.

"Because this app keeps shutting down on me and I need him to help me fix it," Gibby replied. "It's my favorite game; Dairy Slicer!"

"That game's like two years old, dipthong," Sam said.

"It soothes me!"

"I-oh all right," Carly groaned. "T-Bo, come take Gibby's spot up here, Gibby, go sit in T-Bo's spot by the window-"

"I'm not sitting by the window!" Gibby cried. "I'll look out it and have a panic attack!"

"Then don't look out it," Freddie reasoned.

"I can't not look out a window! That's like walking into a room and _not _smelling the rug that's in it."

"Sam, don't!" Carly told her best friend before she could open her mouth to rip on Gibby's last comment.

"Yeah, and I'm not giving up my window seat either!" T-Bo said firmly.

"Neither am I, just putting that out there," Sam said.

"No one asked you to," Freddie reminded her.

"Which is why I said '_Just putting it out there_'," Sam said, shaking her head. "You're unbelievable!"

"Fine, you know what?" Carly said. "Gibby, take my seat, Freddie, come up here and take Gibby's old seat. I'll sit between T-Bo and Spencer behind you. Is everyone happy now?" she asked, standing up. "Huh? Are you?"

She looked up around the plane and realized that the rest of the passengers were staring at her.

"Oh, until you've seen this all from my perspective, you can't judge me!" she said to her onlookers.

"Nice, Carls," Sam chuckled as Freddie, Gibby and Carly rearranged themselves.

The new seating arrangements were Sam, Gibby and Freddie in the first row, and T-Bo, Carly and Spencer in the second row.

Carly feeling very stressed out, but also pleased that she had managed the herculean task of rearranging everyone perfectly, pulled out her pearpod and began listening to music.

"So see, you need to readjust your settings," Freddie told Gibby, fiddling with his pearphone. "And then you should be good and the app should stop shutting down."

"_Readjust your settings,_" Sam mimicked him.

"You know, you weren't complaining when I fixed _your _pearphone back at the smoothie convention," Freddie pointed out. "In fact, I'd say you were _very _appreciative, seeing as you dragged me behind the model of the giant blender to make out."

"Like you've never wanted to make out behind a giant blender," Sam grinned.

"Er, guys?" Gibby frowned, not liking the way his two friends were staring at each other across him now.

"Well, it was fun," Freddie chuckled, ignoring Gibby.

"Too bad there aren't any giant blenders back in Seattle," Sam said.

"Or any other oversized appliances," Freddie nodded. "Um, anybody want to play hangman on my pearphone?" Gibby asked.

"You know," Sam smiled, leaning over Gibby. "Carly bought me a bunch of tubes of smoothie flavored lip gloss at that convention."

"Er, Sam, you're sort of-" Gibby started.

"Really?" Freddie chuckled, also leaning over Gibby, seemingly forgetting that his best friend was even there. "And...do I get to taste this smoothie flavored lip gloss when we get home?"

"Well," Sam said, raising an eyebrow. "I put some on right before we got onto the plane, so if you wanted to now..."

"No!" Gibby said loudly, startling Sam and Freddie, who's lips were now only centimeters away from each others. "This is _not _going to be the cab ride all over again!"


	164. Chapter 164

**AN-Okay, so after the oneshot where I had the whole iCarly gang have a sleepover at the Shay's house after the power went out (Ch150), I got a request to write a oneshot explaining what the goat from iGot a Hot Room did to Carly, since I sort of left the story off just as Sam dared Carly to tell everyone the story. Well, I tried writing a oneshot where I explained what happened with the goat and it just turned out terrible. I mean absolutely horrendous. Plus, I was thinking about it, and I don't think Dan ever meant for us to find out what happened with the goat. It's just supposed to be one of those funny little things we wonder about. But, I felt bad ignoring the request, so I decided to put this oneshot up instead. It basically takes place at the petting zoo when the 'incident' happens, but like I said, I didn't actually say what the goat did. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this! Oh, and obviously this takes place before the Seddie arc, so Sam and Freddie hadn't started dating yet.**

**...**

_Policy_

"Come on, you guys, this place will be tons of fun!" Spencer said as he ran towards the petting zoo eagerly, Carly, Sam, and Freddie dragging their feet along behind him, clearly less pleased than Spencer.

"You promised you'd take us somewhere _cool _if we helped you move all those bricks out of your truck," Sam said.

"This place is cool!" Spencer said.

"It's a petting zoo," Freddie said.

"Yeah, I know!" he grinned. "What's cooler than getting to pet cute little farm animals?"

"Look, Spencer," Carly sighed. "Petting zoos are more for toddlers and little kids. We were thinking you'd take us to a movie, or, I dunno, that new water park. Something like that."

"Oh come on, there's nothing to pet in those places," Spencer said. "I've been coming here for years and I've never been bored!"

"Yeah, and you've also never had a girlfriend for more than two weeks, have you?" Sam pointed out.

"There is no correlation between my petting zoo habits and my lack of a steady girlfriend!" Spencer snapped.

"If you say so..."

"Alright, let's just stay here for a few minutes," Carly suggested. "Spencer can go and pet some animals and the three of us will wait here and then we can all go grab some dinner. Sound like a plan?"

"Fine," Spencer conceded. "Oh look! There's Gio the Donkey!"

"Sometimes I can't believe he's in charge of me," Carly said, leaning against the wooden gate as her guardian ran off to pet the donkey. "I mean, what sort of person is fascinated with a bunch of-Oh my God! Look how cute those goats are!"

"And I think we lost her," Freddie said as Carly ran over to pet the goats.

"Great, now I'm stuck with only you," Sam mumbled, rolling her eyes.

"Thanks," Freddie said, shaking his head. "Well, I'm guess since Carly fell in love with those goats over there, we're going to be here longer than a few minutes."

"Good think I brought some food then," Sam said, pulling a plastic bag out of her pocket.

"What is that?" Freddie asked as Sam opened the bag.

"Bacon chunks," Sam said, popping a few in her mouth.

"They make those?"

"No, I do."

"Of course," Freddie chuckled. "Hey, looks like we have company now..."

Sure enough, several piglets began scurrying over to Sam.

"You're kidding me," Sam frowned.

"Well they probably smelt the bacon on you and thought you were hiding their Uncle Bob somewhere," Freddie laughed.

"Ugh, go away," Sam said to the pigs, which were now sniffing at her shoes. "I can't eat bacon in front of baby pigs!"

"Why not? I've seen you eat bacon off our school cafeteria's floor," Freddie said.

"Five second rule, Benson," Sam told him. "And there were no baby pigs around then! For all I know, this delicious bacon used to be their mother! I'm a meat enthusiast, not a monster, you know."

"Well the several bruises on my body beg to disagree with that, but okay," Freddie shrugged.

"Just help me get rid of them," Sam snapped, shoving her bacon back in her pocket. "So I can get back to enjoying my snack."

"It's your fault they're here in the first place," Freddie said, crossing his arms. "Didn't you read the sign when we came in? There's a strict 'No Food' policy here."

"Well, see, I'm not a total loser," Sam retorted. "So when I go someplace, I don't immediately start looking for the sign with all the annoying rules. Now you gonna help me or not?"

"Fine," Freddie sighed. He crouched down. "Um, hey there pigs. Why don't you go back over there?" He made to pick one up, so he could carry it back, hoping the others would follow, but the pig let out a loud squeal, causing him to jump back in surprise and land in a pool of mud behind him.

"Holy chiz!" Sam laughed, holding onto the wooden fence for support as she doubled over clutching her side. "That-That was the single greatest thing I've ever seen happen in my life! You actually fell in mud!"

"Yeah, real funny, Puckett," Freddie muttered, struggling to get to his feet.

"I think I have tears in my eyes," Sam said, wiping the corners of her eyes. "And hey! You chased away the pigs too! You were finally useful!"

"I have mud in places where mud should never be!" Freddie hissed.

"Hey, some people pay good money to go to fancy spas and sit in that stuff," Sam pointed out. "You should be thanking me and that pig; we just got you the same treatment for free. And believe me, Benson, with that face of yours, you could use all the spa work you can get."

"Really?" Freddie asked, raising an eyebrow. "Well, if you seem to think it's so nice..."

He bent down and picked up a handful of mud and flung it at Sam.

"Hey!" Sam exclaimed, wiping her face.

"But I just treated you a free spa treatment," Freddie smiled innocently.

"Dude, I swear I'm gonna-"

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry," Freddie said quickly as Sam stepped towards him. "But-But think of it as payback." "For what?" Sam asked fiercely. "I didn't throw mud at you. You fell in on your own, nub."

"Yeah, but-but yesterday you almost made me crash into that bike messenger when we were coming out of the Groovy Smoothie!" Freddie said.

"_Almost_," Sam said, crossing her arms. "And beware, after this little stunt of yours, I _will _push you into one. I mean, they're all over the place now; it won't be too hard."

"Yeah, why _are_ they everywhere lately?" Freddie asked.

"I don't know, it's some big fad," Sam shrugged. "But don't change the subject! I swear, when you least expect it-"

"Guys!" Carly cried, running over to her two friends, panting and out of breath. "We got to get out of here! Now!"

"Carly, what's wrong?" Sam asked. "Why are you acting all crazy?"

"The goat!" she exclaimed. "It-It-Ah! We've just got to go!"

"Um, okay," Freddie nodded. "Let's just go find Spencer and-"

But Carly had already hopped over the fence and was running as fast as she could back to Spencer's car.

Sam and Freddie exchanged looks.

"Er," Freddie started. "What exactly just happened?"

"No idea," Sam said, staring after Carly, who was still screaming at the top of her lungs.


	165. Chapter 165

**AN-Alright, well, I spent a lot of time working on this oneshot, trying to make it as PG as possible, since the rest of my oneshots have been along that rating. It's not really bad, it's just that some might consider it for a more mature audience. Just wanted to warn you. **

**...**

_Leave_

"Daddy, I thought we were going to go out for breakfast?" four-year old Jason Benson said, following his father around the living room.

"We are, Jason," Freddie said, lifting one of his and Sam's newborn twin girls out of their playpen and into their carrier. "Just as soon as mommy's ready."

"But I'm hungry!" Jason moaned.

"I know, but you can have all the pancakes you can eat at the restaurant, okay?"

"With syrup?"

"Yeah, but you're not going to put it on yourself this time," Freddie said firmly, lifting the other twin out of the playpen. "Not after that sugar rush you got last time..."

"When's mommy going to be ready?" Jason asked.

"That's a good question," Freddie said, looking at his watch. "Alright, you keep an eye on your sisters for me, and I'll go see what's taking her so long."

Freddie headed upstairs to his and Sam's bedroom.

"Sam, you almost ready?" Freddie asked, poking his head into the room. "Jason's all-Sam! You're not even up yet!"

He walked into the room, stopping at his wife's bedside. "Sam, it's almost ten thirty! You promised yesterday that you'd be up early enough to go to the restaurant!"

"Freddie, just leave," Sam moaned, burying her head in her pillow.

"Look, the restaurant stops serving breakfast at eleven," Freddie said. "Which means if we're going to make it in time, we need to leave _now_. Come on, I got Jason up and dressed, and I have the twins in their carriers. We're all just waiting on you now."

"Go without me," Sam mumbled, pulling her covers tighter around her.

"But it's an all-you-can-eat buffet," Freddie frowned. "You've never passed up on one of those."

"Well I am now," Sam snapped.

"Baby, are you okay?" Freddie asked, sitting down next to her on the bed, concerned.

"Freddie, can you just please go?" Sam asked. "I just want to stay in bed for a little, okay?"

"Are you sick?" Freddie asked, feeling his wife's forehead. "You don't feel warm, but I think you might be a little clammy...want me to get you some medicine?"

"It's not _that _type of sick," Sam groaned.

"Well then what is it? Headache?"

"No."

"Um, allergies?"

"Freddie, for the love of chiz, can't you just leave in peace for like an hour?" Sam said.

"Sam, I just want to make sure you're okay," Freddie said gently, stroking her hair. "Why don't you just tell me what's wrong and then I can-"

"Freddie," Sam sighed, rolling her eyes. "Look, I was _there _with you in health class in high school. What happens to girls about once a month that makes them irritable and crabby so they just want to sit in bed and do nothing?"

"I don't know," Freddie said. "Um, is it something to do with the weather?"

"How can you be such an idiot?" Sam said, shaking her head. "Think, you moron!"

"Sam, I don't know," Freddie said. "Can't you just-wait...oh."

"About time, genius," Sam mumbled.

"So-So you're...you know?" Freddie frowned.

"Yes, so can you just leave me alone?" Sam asked. "Please?"

"But we've been married for five years," Freddie pointed out. "And you've never been...like this."

"It's usually not that bad," Sam muttered. "I can usually just deal with it. But the doctor said that usually right after you give birth, it gets really bad for the first few times after. I was fine after Jason, but I guess since I just had twins..."

"Is it really that bad?" Freddie asked softly.

"I think I'll be fine in a few hours," Sam said. "So can you just take the kids to breakfast on your own, baby?"

"Well it's not fair that you have to stay back," Freddie said, rubbing her back. "So how about we all just stay and you can rest up here and I'll make Jason breakfast downstairs."

"No, he's been wanting pancakes all week," Sam told him. "Besides, I don't think we really have any food for breakfast in the fridge anyway. I'll be alright here, Freddie, you guys go ahead."

"You sure?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah," Sam nodded.

"Do you need anything?"

"Just sleep," Sam yawned, turning over on her side.

"Alright," Freddie said, leaning over to give her a quick kiss. "I'll get the kids and leave now then."

"Thanks," Sam said.

"Feel better," Freddie said, getting up. He left the room, closing the door softly behind him.

"Where's mommy?" Jason asked as Freddie returned downstairs.

"Mommy's not feeling to good right now," Freddie said, picking up the twins carriers. "But she said she wants us to still go to breakfast anyway. You ready to go?"

"Uh-huh," Jason nodded. "Can we bring mommy back some bacon?"

Freddie chuckled. "I'd bet she'd love that, Jason."


	166. Chapter 166

_Tracing_

"I've had a lot of steak in my life," Sam said as her and Freddie walked out of the fancy restaurant he had taken her to for their five-year anniversary. "But I think that was the best I've ever tasted."

"Told you this place would be worth the two hour drive," Freddie laughed, holding her hand as the couple walked back to their car. "Happy anniversary, baby."

"You too," Sam said, smiling as she stood on her toes to kiss her boyfriend. "So, are we going back to Seattle now?"

"Nope," Freddie said, grinning as he opened Sam's door for her. "Hop in. I've got a another little surprise for us..."

"This isn't going to be another trip to a museum, is it?" Sam asked skeptically, getting into the car. "Because I nearly fell asleep at that planetarium you dragged me to last month."

"No, it's not another museum," Freddie promised her.

"Well then what is it?"

"You'll see," Freddie said mysteriously, starting the engine.

Freddie pulled out of the parking lot, chuckling as Sam continued to badger him to give up the location of their next destination, but he didn't budge.

"Will I _like _this place?" Sam asked after Freddie continued to keep his mouth shut for nearly twenty minutes.

"Sam, we've been dating for five years now," Freddie reminded her. "Do you really think I'd take you to a place you wouldn't like?"

"Um, hello, the museum," Sam reminded him.

"Oh come on, you had fun there," Freddie said.

"Hmm, well I guess making out behind that dinosaur exhibit _does _qualify as fun," Sam smiled. "But seriously Benson, can't I at least get a hint?"

"All I'll say is that we're almost there," Freddie said firmly.

"Ugh, you're so frustrating," Sam moaned, crossing her arms.

"Well you've managed to survive five years with me, so I can't be that bad, can I?"

"You have your perks," Sam admitted.

"Alright, we're here," Freddie said finally, bringing the car to a stop.

Sam looked out the window. "The beach?"

"Yup," Freddie nodded. "I know how much you love it."

"Aw, your surprise didn't suck baby!" Sam exclaimed, leaning over and pulling him into a long passionate kiss.

"Well thank you," Freddie laughed. "Come on."

He stepped out of the car and opened up the trunk, revealing a small picnic basket and a blanket. "I thought we could eat desert here," Freddie said.

"We had desert at the restaurant though," Sam pointed out.

"And since when has one desert ever satisfied you?"

"Good point," Sam grinned.

The couple took off their shoes as they walked across the sand, hand in hand. The set the blanket down at a spot only a few feet from the waves, the sea air filling their lungs.

"Here you go," Freddie said as the couple settled down on the blanket. He opened up the picnic basket and handed Sam a glass. He then pulled out a large plastic cup filled with a think, pink substance.

"A Fat Shake!" Sam exclaimed happily as Freddie poured her drink.

"Your favorite," Freddie laughed. He raised his glass. "Heres to five amazing years with the most amazing girl I could ever imagine."

The two clinked glasses and then Sam proceeded to chug down her shake.

"I really love the beach," Sam said, finishing her drink as she scooted closer to Freddie.

"I know you do, that's why I brought you here," Freddie told her, putting his arm around her.

"Thank you for doing all this," Sam said, resting her head on his shoulder and taking one of his hands in hers.

"It's our five-year anniversary, Sam, of course I wanted tonight to be special," Freddie said.

"Well yeah," Sam said softly, tracing tiny circles on the back of his hand. "But, I mean, it's not just on these special occasions that you do stuff like this. Like a few weeks ago you filled my car with those roses I said looked really nice in that magazine. Heck, you even put a strip of bacon in each bouquet for me!"

"I like doing that stuff for you," Freddie smiled, kissing the top of her head. "I love you."

"I love you too," Sam whispered. "But I feel bad..."

"What? Why?" Freddie frowned.

"Because I never do anything like that for you," Sam said. "I just hit you and call you names and steal your food."

"I don't mind that," Freddie told her.

"But," Sam mumbled. "It's like...you're a much better boyfriend than I am girlfriend."

"Hey," Freddie said firmly, looking down right at her. "That's not true."

"Oh come on," Sam said. "You know it is."

"No, it's not," he said. "You have any idea how _lucky_ I am to be with you? You're beautiful, funny, energetic, unique and so much more."

"But I'm-"

"Aggressive and loud," Freddie finished for her.

"Well, yeah," Sam nodded weakly.

"Have you ever thought, Sam," Freddie said, tilting her chin back with his finger gently, so he could look directly into her eyes. "That _that's _what I love about you?"

"You-you do?" Sam asked.

"Yup," Freddie smiled. "I love how you don't let anyone push you around or tell you what to do, and that you're far from shy about saying whatever it is that's on your mind."

"Okay, but still, I never do any of that mushy romantic stuff you do for me," Sam said. "I'm terrible at that!"

"What are you talking about?" Freddie said. "What about the time you went all the way to Canada to get me that NugNug helmet from _Galaxy Wars, _in the middle of a thunderstorm, for my birthday? Or when you stayed back from that big MMA fight to take care of me when I had that bad cold?"

"You-You really remember all those things?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, Sam, because I know it's things like that that show me how much you love me," Freddie said. "You're the most amazing girlfriend any guy can ask for. And I still can't believe that you, a girl who could literally have any guy she wanted, picked me to be her boyfriend."

Sam leaned back against Freddie, letting her wrap his arms around her. "You know, I'm sure a lot of other girls would go out with you too."

"Well, I'm not so sure about that," Freddie chuckled. "But even if that is true, I wouldn't care. I've already got the perfect girl."

"You're really cheesy," Sam smiled. "But I kind of like that..."

Freddie pulled her closer and kissed her gently. "You want to go down to to the ocean? Get our feet wet a bit?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded, giving Freddie another quick kiss.

The couple walked over to the ocean, letting the salt water wash over their bare feet.

"It really is beautiful, isn't it?" Sam asked, looking out at the water.

"It is," Freddie agreed. "Is that why you like the beach so much?"

"I used to go to the beach a lot when I was younger," Sam told him. "I would take a bus when I was six and ride down here. I think i spent more time here than I did at home; I liked it better here."

"Sam," Freddie said gently, wrapping his arms around her once more. "That's another thing I love about you."

"What is?" she asked, confused.

"That you tell me these things," Freddie said. "I like that you let down your walls for me."

Sam said nothing, but continued to stare out to the ocean.

"I like seeing this side of you when we're alone," Freddie continued. "As much as I love your tough-girl outer shell, I really do love this softer side of you..."

Sam squeezed his hands. "Yeah, well, who else am I going to tell?"

"I love you so much, Sam," Freddie said, letting go of her and turning her away from the ocean so that she was now facing him. "These past five years have been...unbelievable. I've loved every minute of them. Talking with you, holding you, kissing you. I can't think of anything that could possibly make me happier than being with you."

Sam was now blushing fiercely.

"Which is why," Freddie continued, putting his hand in his pocket. "I'm finally going to do this."

He got down on one knee and pulled a small velvet box out of his pocket.

Sam's eyes widened as Freddie opened the box to reveal a beautiful diamond ring.

"Freddie-" she whispered.

"I love you, Sam, I know I've said that a lot," Freddie cut her off. "And the idea of spending even a day of my life without you in it is just terrifying to me. I want to spend my life with you. So Samantha Joy Puckett? Will you marry me?"

Sam could no longer hold back the huge smile that she had been trying to control.

"Yes," she nodded, her smile so wide now. "Yes, I'll marry you."

Freddie smiled just as wide as Sam and quickly slid the ring onto her finger, and then stood back up and kissed her deeply.

He had finally done it. He was finally going to marry Sam Puckett, and he could not have been more thrilled.


	167. Chapter 167

_Printer_

"I think you really jammed it, Sam," Freddie sighed, looking at printer that was hooked up to her computer. "I don't think it can be fixed."

"Pfft, what do you know," Sam scoffed. "It's probably fine."

"Sam, you tried to print notebook paper you ripped out of a spiral," Freddie said, shaking his head at his wife. "The ridges got stuck somewhere and I think they really messed this printer up. Yet another electronic that we now have to throw away because of you."

"When have I ever caused us to throw away an electronic?" Sam asked, crossing her arms.

"I've gone through thirteen pearphones this past year just because of your shenanigans!"

"Yeah well...you scratched my car!" Sam retorted.

"_I _didn't scratch your car!" Freddie argued. "Someone parked _next _to me did while I just _happened _to be using it!"

"Fine, but you're the one who broke the shower head jumping at a tiny little spider."

"It was a _huge _spider, probably a tarantula!" Freddie snapped. "And _you're _the one who broke the waffle iron last week with your little experiment!"

"Well you're...a nub," Sam finished.

"Really? That's your argument?" Freddie grinned, amused.

"That's all the argument I need," Sam said. "Look, can you just _try _and fix the printer, baby? I really need to print that document from my laptop."

"Yeah, okay, I'll work on it," Freddie nodded.

"Thanks," Sam said. "I need to drop Tyler off at his friend's house for his play date. You okay watching the other kids? Jason's busy playing the Game Sphere and I think the twins are coloring in the living room."

"Yeah, they're fine," Freddie said, giving his wife a quick kiss as he opened up the printer. "If we're still having pizza for dinner tonight, I found a coupon in the paper this morning, it's on the counter."

"Got it, Fredlumps," Sam said. "Have fun fixing mama's computer."

...

"Alright, I finally got that printer fixed," Freddie said later that night. "And I printed your stuff."

"Thank you, baby," Sam smiled as Freddie sat down next to her on the couch.

"Think we can think of some...other way to thank me?" Freddie grinned, putting his arm around her.

"Later," Sam chuckled softly. "I think Jason might still be up. He claims he's too old for a bedtime now that he's eleven, but he still usually passes out around ten thirty."

"Well, guess we'll wait then," Freddie sighed, taking the remote and turning on the T.V. "Oh look! That documentary on coral fish is on!"

"Get real," Sam said, grabbing the remote from Freddie's hand. "_Metal Chef_ is on!"

"It's probably a rerun, though!" Freddie pointed out, making the grab the remote back, but Sam pushed him away.

"So what? It's still better than watching some lame thing about fish that no one's even going to eat!"

"Give it back, Sam!" Freddie said, still trying to get the remote out of her hands.

"No, now shut up and let me watch my show, you loser!"

"Yeah, well you're a-a-"

Suddenly, the two heard the sound of someone sniffling behind them. They both turned around and saw their seven-year old daughter, Ashton, standing at the foot of the stairs, crying.

"Ashton, what's wrong?" Sam asked, turning off the T.V.

"You have a nightmare?" Freddie asked.

"No," Ashton sniffed. "You-You guys are gonna get a-a divorce, aren't you?"

"What?" Sam frowned, looking at Freddie, who was just as shocked as she was. "Who told you that Ashton?"

"Yeah, come here, sweetheart," Freddie said moving over so that his daughter could sit between him and Sam.

"M-Meg Williams from school," Ashton said shakily, sitting down next to her parents. "She told me that-that _her _parents were fighting all the time, and then they got a divorce, and they didn't live together anymore, and now she only gets to see one of her parents at a time and I don't want that to happen! I don't want you guys to get a divorce!"

"Ash, calm down, honey," Sam said, pulling her daughter, who was now crying so hard she was shaking, onto her lap. "Mommy and daddy aren't going to get a divorce."

"Yeah," Freddie nodded, stroking Ashton's hair. "We love each other very much."

"But-But you guys always fight," Ashton said weakly, hiccuping. "You guys were just yelling at each other about the the T.V., and I heard you earlier yelling because daddy was trying to fix the printer."

"Oh..." Sam said softly, glancing at Freddie.

"Listen, sweetie," Freddie said. "You-You have to understand...mommy and daddy don't _really _fight."

"But you guys yell at each other," Ashton pointed out.

"Well, yeah," Sam nodded. "But we're not yelling _at_ each other...See, sometimes your dad and I just have...disagreements. You disagree with Emma all the time, don't you?"

Ashton nodded slowly.

"Right," Freddie said. "But you still love your sister, don't you?"

"Yes," Ashton said.

"Well it's the same with mommy and daddy," Sam explained. "We get mad at each other over really silly things but that doesn't mean we stop loving each other."

"So-So you're not going to ever get a divorce?" Ashton asked, wiping her eyes.

"No, baby," Freddie told her. "Never."

"Good," Ashton sniffed.

"Come on, Ash," Freddie said, picking her up in his arms. "I'll go tuck you back in. Say good night to mommy."

"Night, mommy," Ashton yawned. "I'm glad you love daddy."

Sam smiled. "Night, Ashton."

She watched as Freddie disappeared upstairs with her daughter and let out a sigh.

...

"Is she asleep?" Sam asked ten minutes later when Freddie came back downstairs.

"Yeah," Freddie sighed, sitting back down next to her. "So...you feel as awful as I do?"

"Yup," Sam said heavily. "We're terrible parents, Freddie! Our seven-year old was bawling her eyes out because she thought we were getting divorce!"

"I know," Freddie nodded. "Maybe...maybe we should try and stop fighting so much?"

"You know we can't do that, Carly's been trying to make that happen for years," Sam pointed out. "But _she _understands that it's not _real_ fighting. How are our kids supposed to know the difference? Sure, Jason's probably old enough, and we just explained it to Ashton, but I'm not even sure she understood fully. She was just so relieved when we told her we weren't getting a divorce! What if she hears us arguing again and starts all over again? And what if Emma gets that same idea? Or Tyler?"

"Sam, shh," Freddie soothed his wife. "Look, I know you and I are probably never going to be able to stop arguing with each other. I mean, it's me and you. Sam and Freddie!"

"But-"

"The important thing is that we really _do _love each other," Freddie continued. "And know that we're not getting divorced."

"But-"

"I think our kids realize that too, I mean, they all say we're gross when we kiss in front of them," Freddie told her. "I think Ashton probably just got freaked out by what that girl at school told her."

"You think?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, I do," Freddie nodded. "But-But maybe we _should _try to at least try and not fight as much in front of the kids anymore."

Sam nodded. "Yeah, you're right."

"Why don't we head up to bed?" Freddie suggested. "I checked Jason's room on my way out of the girl's room and he's fast asleep..."

"Okay," Sam smiled, getting to her feet. "And you know what?"

"What?'

"I love you."

"Love you too," Freddie chuckled.


	168. Chapter 168

_Bitter_

"Freddie," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Come on, man up, will you?"

"Sam, this is a serious injury!" Freddie said, holding his left hand gingerly in his right.

"Baby, it's a splinter."

"Yeah...but it hurts!" Freddie cringed.

"Okay, look, you've got three options," Sam sighed. "One, you act like a normal guy and pull the splinter out yourself. Two, you let me do it, or three, and this is my favorite, I go across the hall, tell your mom about your 'serious injury' and have her rush over here with her over-sized first aid kit."

"You wouldn't," Freddie said, narrowing his eyes.

"I'm waiting for your decision..."

"Alright, alright," Freddie said quickly. "I guess...you do it. But be gentle, okay Sam?"

"Relax I will," Sam said. "Maybe."

"Maybe?" Freddie exclaimed, jerking his hand back. "Maybe?"

"Calm down, I was kidding you nub," Sam snapped, grabbing his hand.

"I'll count to three," Freddie told her. "And then on three, pull it out very-ow!"

"There, gentle enough for you?" Sam smiled, throwing the splinter onto the floor.

"You didn't count!"

"Hey I got it, didn't I?"

"Yeah, I guess you did," Freddie grinned. "Thanks."

He leaned forward to kiss her, but when their lips were less than a centimeter apart, they were interrupted by Carly coming down the stairs.

"Hey, there's my favorite couple," she said brightly as Sam and Freddie reluctantly pulled away from each other. "What goes on?"

"Oh you know, the usual," Sam said. "Freddie got a splinter from touching Spencer's new sculpture and he was being a total whimp, so I had to take measures into my own hands..."

"I told Spencer using those wooden beams he found at the junkyard to make a sculpture wasn't a good idea," Carly sighed. "But hey, listen. Have you guys figured out what you're going to do for your one-year anniversary Saturday?"

"Um, we were thinking of just going out to dinner and seeing a movie," Sam shrugged.

"Yeah, why?" Freddie asked.

"Well," Carly smiled. "You remember back like four years ago when we went to that MMA fight and we met a bunch of the fighters? You know, before Spencer got knocked out."

"Yeah," Sam nodded.

"Well one of the fighters we met there, Nigel Thornsbush, just sent me an email," Carly told them. "He's going to be fighting in some big exhibition fight this Saturday night and he totally hooked us up with some tickets. How would you guys like to be spending your anniversary sitting ring side at one of the greatest fights ever? Or, at least that's what the website said, I don't really follow all these fights."

"Um, that'd be the most awesome thing ever!" Sam said. "Nigel can seriously get us tickets?"

"He's already sent them," Carly said.

"Holy chiz, baby, we have to go see that fight!" Sam said, turning to her boyfriend. "Please? Come on, it will be so much fun!"

"Hey, I like MMA fights," Freddie laughed. "I'm in. Plus, I'm eighteen now, which means my mom can fight all she wants, but she can't stop me from going."

"Yeah, and Spencer can't stop me from going either, since I'm eighteen too," Carly said happily. "Isn't that great?"

Sam and Freddie exchanged glances. "Um? You-You're going to be there with us?" Sam frowned.

"Yeah, Nigel sent us four tickets," Carly said. "So I was thinking me, you, Freddie and Gibby could go."

"The four of us?" Freddie asked skeptically. "On mine and Sam's anniversary?"

"Oh, don't worry," Carly chuckled, rolling her eyes. "The seats aren't next to each other. Two are in one row, and then the other two are behind them. You and Sam can sit together and me and Gibby will sit behind you, and you won't even know we're there!"

"Well...I guess that could work," Sam said slowly. She really _did _want to see this fight, after all.

"Yeah, I guess," Freddie nodded.

"Cool, I'll text Gibby and tell him the good news," Carly said, pulling out her pearphone. "This is going to be so much fun!"

...

"I can't believe we're actually here at the biggest fight of MMA history!" Sam said excitedly as her and Freddie took their seats. "This is going to be the best anniversary ever!"

"I know," Freddie smiled. "How much longer until the first fight starts?"

"About ten minutes," Sam replied. "Any ideas on what to do until then?"

"I've got a few," Freddie grinned, leaning close to her, ready to feel her lips on his...

"Hey, Sam, I'm confused," Carly said from behind them, poking her head between them, looking at the schedule for the fights. "Are the fighters going to fight every other fighter here? Or is it like a knock off thing?"

"They take the winner from each fight and set them up with a new opponent, Carly," Sam said, trying not yell at her best friend for just breaking up a perfectly good make-out moment with Freddie. "I've explained that to you a hundred times."

"Hey, are these numbers next to each of the fighters names their ages or their weights?" Gibby asked.

"Their weights, Gibby!" Freddie said, also bitter about being interrupted. "Do you really think there are any 250 year old fighters here?"

"Hey, I'm not a rocket scientist, you know!" Gibby defended.

Sam and Freddie turned back around.

"So," Freddie said, trying to get the interruption out of his head. "Where were we?"

"Right about here," Sam said, smiling as she leaned in again.

"Oh look! That guy's selling slushies!" Gibby said excitedly, shaking Freddie shoulder, once again breaking up a kiss.

"Well then go buy one!" Sam exclaimed.

"You know, I could go for a slushie," Carly said thoughtfully. "Hey, why don't I get us all some? My treat since it's Sam and Freddie's big night!"

"Er, thanks, Carls," Freddie said.

"Okay, I'll be right back," Carly said brightly, heading over to the smoothie guy.

"Hey, do you guys think it's too late for me to become an MMA fighter?" Gibby asked.

"Probably, you're all lumpy," Sam snapped.

"Hey! I'm _all_ muscle!"

Freddie rolled his eyes. Normally, he would've tried to get Sam to ease up on her Gibby-directed insults, but, well, right now the only thing on his mind was the fact that he couldn't stop staring at Sam's untouched tips.

"Whatever," Sam said, turning back around. Freddie took her hand in his.

"I thought we weren't going to know they were here," he whispered to her.

"I know," Sam mumbled. "But maybe when Carly comes back with the slushies, I can talk to her and-"

"Alright, four slushies," Carly said, hurrying back to the seats with the drinks in her arms. "Sam, Freddie, here are-whoa!"

She had tripped on a puddle of Whaoo Punch that was pooled by Sam and Freddie's aisle, sending the slushies flying and landing right on the couple.

"I'm okay, I'm okay," Carly said, getting to her feet. "Oh my God! I'm so sorry you guys!"

"It's...fine," Freddie sighed, looking down at the pile of very cold slushie on his lap.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I want grape slushie in my hair," Sam said, struggling to keep from yelling.

"Still, I'm so sorry," Carly said. "Oh! You know, this would be a really cute Splashface picture though!"

"Um, yeah, hold that thought," Freddie said. "I-I'm just going to get some napkins from the concession stand...you want to come, Sam?"

"Yup," she said at once, getting out of her seat.

"Hey, can you see if they have those chocolate covered pretzels while you're there?" Gibby called after them.

"Well, this didn't turned out exactly as we planed, did it?" Freddie sighed. "Here we are, sticky beyond belief, our friends are being, well, irritating-"

"-And we haven't made out once!" Sam exclaimed.

"I know," he nodded. "But...we are alone now..."

"Yeah, we are!" Sam grinned. She wasted no time in throwing her arms around Freddie's neck and pulling him into a long passionate kiss.

Suddenly, there were loud cheers coming from the audience, and the couple broke apart.

"I think the fight's starting now," Freddie commented, looking down at the ring as two large fighters entered. "Want to go back to our seats? We may not exactly get the alone time we wanted tonight, but at least you can still see this fight you've been so excited about."

Sam looked down at the ring, in deep contemplation. "No," she said finally.

"What do you-"

"I-I'll catch the highlights of the fights on the Internet," Sam said. "Come on, let's get out of here."

"Did you really just pick spending time with me over an MMA fight?" Freddie asked, laughing.

"You're just lucky you're not as bad at kissing as one would think," Sam smirked.

...

"Man, we're lucky Spencer has his date with the fast food girl tonight," Freddie said as him and Sam let themselves into the Shay's empty apartment.

"Yeah, yeah, less talking, more kissing," Sam ordered, throwing her bag and jacket onto the floor.

"You got it, baby," Freddie chuckled.

Still attached at the lips, the couple found their way over to the sofa.

"You want me to go get some candles or something?" Freddie asked between kisses, letting his fingers run through Sam's sticky, yet still soft, curls. "To make this a bit more romantic? I think there's some in the iCarly studio we could-"

"No, come on, let's just make out," Sam mumbled against his lips.

"Yeah, this is _so _much better than a fight," Freddie said, breathing heavily.

The couple continued their make-out session for ten minutes, and they were still showing no signs of stopping. That is until they heard the front door of the apartment open.

Spencer, who was wearing his headphones, happily singing along to the music, walked.

"_Let's go-oo to the mall_-ah! What are you two doing? What-You're-Ah! My eyes! My eyes!"

"Spencer, we're-" Freddie started, but Spencer had already turned to run out of the apartment. He didn't get far, though, before his pants fell down and he tripped, hitting his head on the floor. "Ow!" he screamed from the hallway.

"Um, we should probably go check on him," Freddie said slowly.

"Or we can finish making out and then go see if he's okay?" Sam said.

"Sam..."

"I know, I know," she sighed, getting up.

The two ran out to the hall where Spencer was lying, in his boxers, moaning and clutching his head.

"Here," Freddie said, offering the man a hand. "You okay?"

"No!" Spencer said, taking Freddie's hand and getting to his feet. "Do you know how long it's going to take me to get those images out of my poor little head?"

"Dude, we were just making out," Sam pointed out.

"None of your back talk, missy!" Spencer said. "You do not sneak into people's apartments and make out! It's gross and icky and-" he let out a gasp. "My goldfish was in his bowl in the counter! How could you do all that in front of him?"

"Er, yeah, your fish died," Freddie told him. "Carly flushed it down the toilet a few hours ago."

"What? Goldilocks!"

"Why are you even home anyway," Sam asked, rolling her eyes. "Didn't you have a date with that lady from the fast food joint?"

"She canceled, thank you very much," Spencer said. "And just because you thought I wasn't going to be home doesn't mean you can break into my apartment and-and-smooch!"

"Look, we just wanted some time alone," Freddie said. "It's our one-year anniversary."

"Yeah, and I thought you were going to that big MMA fight," Spencer pointed out.

"We did," Sam said. "But Carly and Gibby kept interrupting us and they spilled slushies on us, so we left. And we couldn't go to Freddie's place, because his wacko mom's there, and my mom's at my house experimenting with her new Do-It-Yourself piercing kit!"

"What's she piercing?" Spencer frowned.

"You really want to know?"

"Um...no. Okay, I get that you want to have time to yourself," Spencer said, calming down a bit. "But I do _not _want to see it! I come into my apartment, ready for a nice bubble bath-I mean, shower, and instead find...you guys...sucking face!"

"Spencer, we're sorry-" Freddie started.

"But," Spencer continued. "I _guess _since it's your one-year anniversary...Alright, I'll go down to the Groovy Smoothie and hang out with T-Bo for a little and you guys can get back to your activity."

"Wow, thanks, Spence," Sam said.

"_But_!" Spencer said firmly. "I'm not going to tell you when I'm coming back, so you two make sure that what I was forced to walk in on is as far as it goes, you got it?"

"Yeah, thanks a lot, Spencer," Freddie nodded. "We really owe you one."

"Yeah, maybe one of these days we'll pay you back for all the food we eat here," Sam grinned.

"Like that will ever happened," Spencer said, rolling his eyes. "Okay, I'll see you guys, and remember! I can be back at any minute!"

"Um, Spence?" Freddie said as Spencer turned to go downstairs. "If you're gonna go to the Groovy Smoothie, you might want to pull up your pants..."

"Oh, right," Spencer said quickly, yanking his jeans up.

...

**AN-So...anybody know what song Spencer was singing as he was walking into the apartment? Shout-outs to anybody who does**


	169. Chapter 169

**AN-So the song that Spencer was singing when he came into his apartment yesterday was... 'Let's Go to the Mall' by Robin Sparkles from **_**How I Met Your Mother**_**! Congratz to:**

**SeddieJathenFan**

**Rachellie2014**

**Ronnhermioneforevs**

**Emenette574**

**Kezziexx**

**...**

_Village_

"How can it be raining this hard?" Carly frowned, looking out the window in Sam and Freddie's living room. "Hasn't the sky run out of water by now?"

"I dunno," Sam, who was laying on the couch, yawned.

"You've been laying their for over an hour," Carly said, amused, looking over at her best friend.

"Well, she did eat a good nine pounds of turkey," Freddie smirked, walking into the room with Gibby. "A new record from last Thanksgiving."

"Yup, it's a proud day," Sam said, sitting up so the guys could sit with her on the couch. "Although I'm impressed with Emma. She ate almost as much as me. I don't think _I _could even eat that much when I was twelve."

"What are we supposed to do here until it stops raining?" Gibby asked.

"You guys could be like normal dudes and watch the football game," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"No, I'm not watching another football game," Gibby said firmly. "Not after those mean quarterbacks cut me in line at Inside Out Burger. I'm not going to support their sport."

"Wait, did I hear you guys were watching the game?" Spencer asked, running into the room with T-Bo.

"Gibby doesn't want to support the quarterbacks, so no," Carly replied.

"Hey, I'm with you, man," T-Bo said. "I asked the quarterback from the Seattle Cobras to be the official spokesman of the Groovy Smoothie and he said no! He went to some fancy pants yogurt place instead."

"Well let's watch something," Sam said, picking up the remote. She turned on the T.V. but found she was met only with a bunch of static. "What?" she exclaimed. "The cable's out? What am I supposed to do?"

"Ah! Mom! Dad!" Sam and Freddie's eight-year old, Tyler screamed, running into the room. "The cable just went out! Right when the second quarter of the game was about to start!"

"You let your son watch football?" Gibby said to Freddie, scandalized. "You know how I feel about the sport!"

"Oh calm down," Sam said. "I'm sure Kirby and Huey were watching with him."

"Yeah, they were," Tyler nodded.

"My own sons!" Gibby gasped. "The betrayal!"

"But mom? What am I going to do?" Tyler continued. "I have to see the game! I've never missed a Cobras game yet!"

"Hey, you remember when I was going to try out to be on the Cobras?" Spencer said, reminiscing. "Good times, good times."

"Well I can't call the cable company, Ty, no one's going to be in on Thanksgiving," Sam said. "Looks like you'll just have to check the score online tomorrow."

"Well what am I supposed to do until then?" the eight-year old moaned.

"Hey!" Freddie said suddenly. "Since everyone's here, this would be the perfect time to test out the new game I just finished!"

"You made a game?" Spencer frowned.

"A stupid game," Sam said. "And he didn't even make one up. He pretty much just copied the idea from that headband game you two used to be obsessed with!"

"I came up with better cards to guess," Freddie defended, pulling out a box from the shelf by the television.

"Oh, we really have to play _that_?" Carly moaned. "I hate that game!"

"Come on, it will be fun!" Freddie said excitedly. "Tyler, go get everyone from upstairs and tell them to come down here."

"Are there even enough headbands for everyone?" Gibby asked.

"Yup, just enough," Freddie nodded. "Since everyone's spouse left after dinner. Pretty convenient, huh?"

"Yeah, real convenient," Sam moaned.

"Sweet! I loved playing this game!" Spencer said. "I haven't played in years! Ella says it brings out this weird competitive thing in me."

"Your wife's a smart lady," Sam said.

"Mom, please tell me we don't have to play dad's lame headband game," Sam and Freddie's daughter, Emma said as her and the rest of the kids made their way into the living room.

"Sorry, Em," Sam said, giving her a sympathetic smile. "We all got roped into it."

"Well, at least it's better than football," Quincy, Gibby's oldest son, who was the same age as Sam and Freddie's twins and Carly's daughter, Clarissa.

"At least I have one son who hasn't stabbed me in the back," Gibby said approvingly. "Unlike you two!"

Gibby's other two sons, Huey, who was seven, and Kirby, who was nine, exchanged confused looks.

"Of course you like this game," Emma said to Quincy. "It's for total nubs, just like you."

"Hey!" Quincy exclaimed.

"Em, be nice," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Can't me and Clarissa go back upstairs?" Ashton asked. "We were giving each other manicures."

"No, it's more fun with more people," Freddie said.

"Yeah!" Spencer nodded enthusiastically, grabbing a headband and putting it on his head. "Come on, Dina, Bryan! You'll get to see your old man back in his element!"

Spencer's two children, who were nineteen and seventeen, shook their heads in embarrassment as they reluctantly sat down next to their father.

"Do we really all have to play?" Jason asked. "I'm sixteen. Aren't I a little old for family game nights?"

"This game's ages 5-99," Freddie said.

"See, my kid's the only one not complaining," T-Bo said proudly as his six year old son, Jimmy, sat down next to him.

"That's because he chewed about thirty pieces of gum upstairs," Clarissa pointed out. "I'm pretty sure his jaw's glued shut right now."

"What?" T-Bo exclaimed, turning to his son. "Thirty pieces? What's the matter with you?"

"Okay, let's just start the game," Carly said.

"Thank you, Carls," Freddie said happily, handing everyone a headband and a facedown card. "At least _someone _other than Spencer and I is excited to play this game."

"I just want to get it over with," Carly mumbled to Sam, who laughed.

"Now see, unlike the original game, which has cards that are impossible to guess," Freddie said, putting his card, which read village, on his headband blindly. "This version has cards that are much easier to figure out, eliminating the frustration and stress that went along with the original."

"What is torque?" Sam asked, looking at her card.

"It's the rotational equivalent of force," Freddie told her. "And you're not supposed to look at your card, Sam!"

"Yeah, that's cheating!" Spencer said loudly. "You have to get a new card now!"

"Alright, now youngest goes first and then we go to the right, so Jimmy, start us off!" Freddie said, settling himself next to Sam.

Jimmy mumbled something incoherent through his bubble gum stuffed mouth.

"Okay, spit it out," T-Bo said, holding his hand out under his son's mouth. Obeying, Jimmy spit out the very large wad of chewed gum into his father's hand.

"What?" T-Bo asked as everyone gave him a disgusted look.

"Nothing," Freddie said. "Go ahead, Jimmy. Take your turn. Ask any yes or no question and try and figure out what the card on your head says."

"Am I small?" Jimmy asked. His card read Pancake.

"Relatively," Spencer nodded.

"I don't know what that means," Jimmy frowned.

"Well there can be big ones," Freddie pointed out, apparently not hearing Jimmy.

"Yes, but compared to most things, they're small," Spencer said. "So your official answer is yes, Jimmy."

"Hey, you can't give the official answers!" Freddie said. "We have to take an poll of the whole group and-"

"Just let Spencer give the official answer," Sam said.

"But-"

"Okay Gibby, go ahead!" Carly said, cutting him off.

"Am I...a person?" Gibby asked. His card read Astronaut.

"Yes," Spencer nodded.

"Am I an evil quarterback?"

"Gibby! Drop it with the quarterbacks!" Sam exclaimed.

"Yeah, and you only get one question a turn! You're up, Quincy," Freddie said.

"Let's see..." Quincy said thoughtfully. His card read Arm. "Am I useful?"

"Well the thing on your card is, but you're sure not," Emma mumbled.

"Emma, be nice," Freddie said again. "And go, it's your turn."

"Fine," Emma sighed. Her card read Monkey. "Am I edible?"

"No," Clarissa said.

"But I'd bet you try to eat one anyway," Quincy said under his breath.

"Hey!" Emma snapped, making to punch his shoulder, but luckily Sam grabbed her arm just in time.

As the game progressed, the players began guessing what there card read. Soon, after nearly two hours, the only two left in the game were Freddie and Spencer.

"Okay," Spencer said. "I think I got it...Am I tire?"

"No," Freddie sighed. Spencer's card read Boat. "Am I a nickel?"

"Well, it stopped raining finally," Carly said, looking out the window. "I think I'm going to head home. Come on Clarissa."

"Guys, can't you just give up?" Sam asked. "This is going to wind up lasting the rest of the night."

"I can't give up, Sam!" Freddie cried.

"Yeah, we never managed to actually finish one of these games!" Spencer nodded.

"But dad, you're our ride home," Bryan said.

"Come on, I'll drive you guys home," Carly said. "He'll be here for awhile..."

"Am I a carrot?" Spencer asked desperately. "Please tell me I'm a carrot!"

"No," Freddie moaned miserably. "Am I dolphin?"

"Can't we just tell them what they are now?" Jason asked his mother.

"Yeah, seriously, this is getting sort of pathetic," Ashton nodded.

"Give them another hour," Sam told them. "Then you can."

...

**AN-So I decided to leave out everyone's spouse from this (excluding Sam and Freddie, of course), just because it got too confusing with all of the new characters.**


	170. Chapter 170

**AN-Hey! Late shout-out to Onepiecex3, who got the song that Spencer was singing two chapters ago!**

_Cheese_

"So?" Carly said, smiling happily and coming over to Sam and Freddie. "You guys having fun?"

Carly had thrown a big New Years Eve party at her and Spencer's apartment. She had been planing it for weeks, all to try and get the attention of one cute boy who she had just moved into the building.

"Yeah," Sam nodded, Freddie's arms wrapped around her. "Nice party, Carls."

"Well, we haven't seen much of it, Sam's refusing to leave the refreshments table," Freddie chuckled.

"There's like nine different types of cheese here!" Sam defended.

"Do you think Matt is having a good time?" Carly asked, craning a neck to try and see her crush. "I've been talking to him and he says he has, but I don't know if he means that, or is just saying that to be nice..."

"I'm sure he's having a blast," Freddie assured her.

"Hey, what are we all talking about here?" Gibby asked, joining the group.

"Carly's freaking out over a guy, what else is new?" Sam said, stuffing a cracker with a fancy French cheese into her mouth.

"Where's Tasha?" Freddie asked Gibby.

"Bathroom," he replied. "She's says she wants to fix her lip gloss for the big midnight kiss coming up in half and hour."

"Oh my God, there's only thirty minutes left?" Carly exclaimed. "Okay, guys, we need to start going over the game plan!"

"Game plan?" Sam repeated.

"I need to make sure that when midnight comes, there are no other girls around Matt so that he has no choice but to kiss me," Carly said. "Since the whole mistletoe incident didn't work out at my Christmas party..."

"Hey, Carly, isn't that guy over there the dude you've been freaking out over for the past three weeks?" Spencer asked, walking over to the refreshment table. "The one who has three girls chatting him up?"

"No!" Carly moaned. "No! This can't be happening! I planned this party so carefully! I bought nine cheeses off the Internet!"

"Wow, I'm glad I already have a date," Spencer said. "My girlfriend Viktoria just stepped outside to make a call. Isn't she hot?"

"Dude, you've asked us that question about thirty times tonight," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"I'm pretty sure she's a Russian spy," Gibby said, dipping a chip into a bowl of guacamole.

"What?" Spencer scoffed. "She can't be a spy! She's too hot!"

"I dunno man, I usually have good instincts when it comes to these things," Gibby shrugged.

"If you want, Carls, I can go 'talk' to those girls," Sam suggested, giving Gibby a weird look.

"No way, Sam," Freddie said firmly. "You've gone five months without causing any random strangers physical pain, you don't want to ruin the streak now."

"But I'm helping a friend, baby!" Sam pointed out. She turned back to Carly. "What do you say, Carls?"

"Sam, I don't want you hurting anyone tonight," Carly said, still looking at the three girls flirting with Matt. "But, I mean, if you were to get rid of them without causing them any bodily harm..."

"I'm on it," Sam said, setting down her cup and hurrying over to the girls.

"Carly!" Freddie exclaimed. "You made her break the five month streak!"

"Freddie, I haven't had a boyfriend in ten months, and here we are, on New Years Eve and I have no one to kiss!" Carly said. "I'm desperate, okay! Just enjoy the party and try not to think of what Sam might be doing to get those guys away from Matt."

"How can I enjoy the party? You sent my girlfriend away," he mumbled.

"Believe it or not, there are other things to do besides shove your tongue down her throat," Carly said.

"Gross! Images!" Spencer cringed. "But hey, if you're bored, I can tell you all about my hot girlfriend, Viktoria!"

"The Russian spy," Gibby said.

"Gibby!"

"Hey, hey, how's it going?" T-Bo asked, walking over to the group. "Cool party."

"Thanks," Carly smiled. "Um, why do you have a giant stick?"

"You can't expect me to start the new year eating food not on a stick?" T-Bo said, grabbing a finger sandwich and sliding it onto the stick. "Oh and hey! This is my date, Veronica."

A pretty blonde woman joined T-Bo's side.

"Wait, Veronica!" Spencer exclaimed, realizing that this woman used to be the bag girl he dated. "You're dating T-Bo now?"

"Well, yeah," Veronica said, a bit uncomfortable in the current situation. "He doesn't wear suits all the time, or fake his own death. Plus, he gives me free smoothies."

"Oh well, that's nice," Spencer said, clearly thinking quite the opposite in his head. "I'm dating someone new too. Her name's Viktoria."

"She's a-" Gibby began, but Spencer quickly stuffed a pig in a blanket in his mouth.

"Oh, where is she?" Veronica asked.

"Um, outside, making a phone call," Spencer said. "But she's real, I swear!"

"Hey," Freddie said. "Where'd Sam and those girls go?"

"I dunno," Carly frowned, looking around the room. "But look! Matt's not talking to anyone! Time to make my move." She ran over to Matt.

"Five minutes until midnight!" someone called. "Everyone better couple up!"

"Hey, Gibby!" Tasha said, hurrying over to Gibby and throwing her arms around him. "You ready for our big midnight kiss? I'm so excited and-"

"Play it cool, babe," Gibby said smoothly.

"Oh look! There's Viktoria!" Spencer said, spotting his date walking into the room and rushing over to her.

Freddie looked around the room for his own girlfriend, but he couldn't spot Sam anywhere.

"Carly," he said, pulling her away from Matt, who was laughing at something she just said.

"Freddie!" she hissed, pulling her arm out of his grasp. "What did you do that for? Midnight's in three minutes and-"

"Sam's still not back yet," Freddie said. "Who am I supposed to kiss at midnight?"

"Well, I'm sure she'll be back any minute," Carly assured him.

"You'd better be right," Freddie mumbled.

"Don't worry," Carly said. "Sam wouldn't leave you hanging on New Years Eve." She gave him one last reassuring smile before joining Matt again.

"One minute!" someone in the crowd called.

Freddie pulled out his pearphone and quickly dialed Sam's number, but there was no answer.

"Thirty seconds!"

Everyone had coupled up at this point, and Freddie was painfully aware of the many eyes staring at the lone single individual in the room.

"Fifteen seconds!"

Where _was_ Sam? He had been looking forward to getting to kiss her at midnight for weeks now.

"Ten!" the crowed began to countdown. "Nine! Eight! Seven!"

It looked like he was going to have to start the New Year kissless and alone. Just like last year.

"Six! Five! Four!"

Carly and Matt were close together now, leaning in. Well, at least Carly finally got her guy...

"Three! Two!"

_Some New Years this turned out to be_, Freddie thought miserably to himself.

"One!"

Suddenly, he felt someone grab his shoulders and spin him around, and his lips connected with another soft, familiar pair.

He heard cheers and cries from the crowd around him as the new year rolled in, but at that moment, all Freddie could concentrate on were the fireworks that were going off inside of him. The same ones that erupted every time him and Sam kissed.

"Hey," he grinned when they finally pulled apart. "You made it."

"You didn't think I'd miss the big midnight kiss, did you?" Sam chuckled.

"I've got to admit, you had me a little worried," Freddie laughed. "But I'm glad you got here in time. But, um, what did you do to those three girls?"

"Well..." Sam said mysteriously.

"Please tell me you didn't hurt them," Freddie pleaded.

"Relax, I didn't," Sam told him. "But they might just wake up in a few hours very confused and on a bus to Quebec. Hey, is there any more of that French cheese left?"

Freddie rolled his eyes as his girlfriend pulled him once more over to the refreshments. Just then, though, as couples began to pull apart from one another, the apartment door slammed open and two men in suits came in.

"Um, can I help you?" Carly frowned.

"Yes, we're with the CIA," one of the men said, pulling out badge. "And we have information that Viktoria Gorchavek is here."

The girl Spencer had his arm around gasped and pulled a tiny device out of her bag and dropped it onto the floor, filling the room with smoke.

"What just happened?" Sam coughed when the smoke finally began to dissolve after a moment.

"Hey, Viktoria's gone!" Freddie said, looking around the room.

"Why's the CIA looking for her?" Spencer asked the two men.

"We have proof that she has been feeding top secret information from this country back to Russia," one men said.

"In other words, she's been spying on this country for nearly a year," the other said.

"What?" Spencer exclaimed. "But-But she's so hot!"

"Yes, she also uses her looks to woo in stupid Americans and empty out their bank accounts," the first man said. "Now if you'll excuse us, we have a spy to catch."

"Well, at least you only had like sixteen bucks in your bank account," Carly said to her brother as the CIA agents left.

"I can't believe I was like five feet away from a real Russian spy and I didn't even get her autograph!" Sam moaned.

"Well," Gibby said smugly, crossing his arms. "Looks like _somebody _was right about _somebody's _girlfriend being a Russian spy, now wasn't he?"

"Gibby!" Spencer exclaimed.


	171. Chapter 171

**AN-This oneshot takes place after the seddie arc and iPear Store, and Sam and Freddie aren't dating in it.**

**...**

_Inevitable_

"Freddie, just stay still so I can finish rubbing the ointment on your-"

"Mom!" Freddie said firmly. "Enough!"

"Fine," Marissa scoffed. "Make sure you take your fruit sauce from the fridge so you have something tasty and nutritious to snack on at school!"

"Yeah, okay," Freddie said, making a mental note to head straight to the vending machine when he got to Ridgeway. "See you later, mom."

Grabbing his bag, he headed across the hall to the Shay's apartment.

"Hola chica," Freddie said brightly, spotting Carly and Sam sitting at counter. "And Sam."

Sam stuck her tongue out at him but then turned back to Carly and continued whispering something to Carly.

"What are you guys talking about?" Freddie asked, grabbing a waffle from the pile of them on the kitchen island.

"Nothing," Carly said quickly, giving Sam a look.

"Yeah, mind your own business," Sam snapped.

"So," Freddie said, rolling his eyes at Sam's last comment. "Are we gonna finish filming that bit for iCarly after school? You know, since I now have nothing to do anymore since a certain maniac got me fired from my job at the Pear store."

"You got yourself fired," Sam said. "Not my fault you have zero people skills."

"Guys, come on, be...civil," Carly said. She turned to Freddie. "Yeah, after school sounds fine. I already got the trampoline set up and-" She stopped as Sam nudged her in the ribs, giving her a look.

"Wait, it's _today?_" Carly whispered, frowning.

"Yes," Sam nodded.

"What's today?" Freddie asked.

"Nothing," both girls said at once.

"But you-"

"Oh calm down," Sam said, getting to her feet. "Anyway, I'm gonna head to school. See you later, Carls."

"School doesn't start for another hour though," Freddie pointed out, looking at his watch. But Sam had already disappeared out the door.

"Um, she has detention," Carly said. "And well, it looks like we can't film that iCarly bit today after school. Why don't we just to it tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I guess that's fine," Freddie said. "But what's Sam-"

"Do you want syrup for that waffle?" Carly cut him off. "You can't have a waffle without syrup!"

...

"I really appreciate Spencer driving us to school all the time," Carly said as her and Freddie walked into the high school. "But I wish he'd put on pants for it. Those kids in the front of the school keep laughing at his dinosaur boxers."

"Yeah, well, Spencer doesn't seem to notice," Freddie shrugged.

"I know," Carly said as she turned a corner, walking just a little bit in front of Freddie. "But I still-No! Wait!"

She suddenly turned around just as Freddie was about to turn the corner behind her, pushing him back.

"What was that for?" Freddie cried.

"I, um, you have a spider on your face?" Carly said lamely.

"Carly..."

"Look," Carly sighed. "You-You just might not want to go over there right now."

"Why not?" Freddie frowned. "My English class is over there."

"Well...I think you should wait a minute before you do," Carly said.

"Carly, what's going on?" Freddie asked, crossing his arms.

"Okay, I-We didn't want you to find out about this so soon," Carly sighed. "But...well, if you go over there, you'll see something you probably won't like."

"Like what?" Freddie asked, pulling his arm out of Carly's grasp and walking around the corner. "What's so bad about-"

He stopped in this tracks. He saw what Carly must've been talking about.

He spotted Sam near her locker, her arms thrown around the neck of Cory Hampton, a member of the Ridgeway soccer team, kissing him.

"He asked her out yesterday," Carly said softly, coming to Freddie's side. "When she was at the soccer fields with Wendy, hitting golf balls at the girls again."

"So-So they're going out?" Freddie asked, not able to tear his eyes away from the scene in front of him.

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "They're going on their first date after school today."

"Oh," Freddie said, trying to keep his voice level as his stomach clenched. "So, um, that's why Sam can't do iCarly today then, right?"

"Er, yeah," Carly. "Look, Freddie, Sam didn't really want you finding out right now."

"Why? Why would I care who she dates," Freddie said, pulling on a smile that seemed a bit too big and plastic.

"Well, because you two _did _date for like, a month and a half," Carly said. "I told Sam that once she figures out if she thinks she's going to stay with Cory for awhile, _then _obviously she'd have to tell you, but like I just said, they're only going out on their first date today."

"Well that's...nice," Freddie said. "But honestly, Carly, Sam can date whoever she wants. I don't care."

"Really?" Carly said, putting her hands on her hips, raising an eyebrow.

"Really!" Freddie said. "But, um, I-I didn't know her and Cory even talked."

"They met in juvie a couple of years ago," Sam said. "You know, after she put that chile dog down the Spanish ambassador's pants? He was in there for trashing some guy's car after a soccer match."

"Hmm, he seems wonderful then," Freddie said.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Carly asked, patting his back.

"Of course I'm okay!" Freddie said. "I mean if that guy wants to have Sam, the loud, crazy, immature, meat-gobbling delinquent of Seattle, as his girlfriend, then fine. Good luck to him!"

"Freddie," Carly frowned. "Why are you being so-"

"I'm gonna go to class, see you after school, Carls," Freddie said, walking right past the kissing couple.

...

"Hey, hey, how's it going, teens?" Spencer said as Carly and Freddie walked into the apartment after school.

"We're just gonna study for our history test tomorrow," Carly said. "Um, why are you covered in gold paint? Please tell me it's from a sculpture."

"Not exactly," Spencer said. "See, I was at the junkyard, and there were these three hobos and-"

"I don't want to know!" Carly chuckled.

"Hey, where's Sam?" Spencer asked.

"She's, um," Carly started, looking over at Freddie.

"She's on a date," Freddie said, sitting down on the couch.

"Wow, really?" Spencer frowned. "Um, are you okay?"

"Yes!" Freddie exclaimed. "Why does everyone keep asking me that?"

"Well, this looks like it's going to turn into some teenage drama," Spencer said. "I'm gonna go shower off, but I want the deats later!"

"I mean just because Sam and I used to go out," Freddie said as Spencer retreated to his room. "Doesn't mean I'm gonna freak out because she's dating some new guy! I mean, if you should be feeling sorry for anyone, it's Cory."

"Alright, Benson," Carly snapped.

Freddie jumped, clearly taken back by her tone.

"I've been listening to you go on and on about how much you don't care about Sam anymore all the way home, and you know what I've concluded?"

"What?" Freddie asked.

"That you obviously still do!"

"Carly, that's ridiculous!" Freddie scoffed. "I don't-"

"Yes, you do," Carly said firmly. "That's why you haven't stopped talking about her and Cory all day!"

"Well that's just because-"

"And," Carly continued. "You want to know something?"

"Er, what?"

"Sam didn't even want to go out with Cory at first," she said, crossing her arms, glaring at Freddie. "I'm the one who had to talk her into it!"

"Wait, why?" Freddie asked. "Why'd you do that?"

"Because, I thought you deserved it," she said. "Sam came here yesterday and told me that Cory asked her out, and she was about to text him and tell him that she wasn't interested, but I told her that was crazy, that Cory was cute and that she hadn't gone out with a guy since you, so she should go for it!"

Freddie suddenly felt very angry at Carly. "Why do I deserve this? Not that I _care_ that Sam's going out with-"

"Oh drop the act, Freddie," Carly snapped. "And you want to know why you deserve it?"

"Yes, why? Please enlighten me as to why-"

"Because you've been a complete jerk to Sam for the past three months!"

Freddie gasped, and Carly even looked startled by what she said.

"I have not," Freddie defended.

"Yeah, you have," Carly said boldly. "I mean, it seems like lately all you do is insult her!"

"Excuse me, but may I remind you that she's been insulting me for five years straight!" Freddie pointed out.

"Yes, but it's...different," Carly said.

"How?" Freddie frowned.

"Look, I know Sam's spent practically the whole time you've known each other calling you 'loser' or 'nub' and manipulating your name," Carly said. "And causing you physical and emotional pain, and-"

"-Where exactly are you going with this?" Freddie asked. "I thought you were supposed to be defending Sam."

"Okay, okay," Carly said. "But the point is, sure, Sam's sort of...aggressive, but that's who she is! She's mean to Gibby, and to T-Bo and a ton of other people too! That's who she is, but once you hang out with her, you learn to love her anyway! But, you, you, Freddie, are one of the nicest guys out there! You're nice to everyone! That's why it's been bothering her so much when you're mean to _only her_! I mean, you come in here the other day and say 'hello good people..._and Sam_'! You gave everyone _but her _a pear! And now all you've been doing since school is saying what a terrible girlfriend she was!"

Freddie looked at the ground. "It's-It's been bothering her?" he mumbled.

"Yes," Carly nodded. "She doesn't really say anything, obviously, but I'm her best friend and I can tell. And unlike you, in the seven months since you've broken up, she's never said that _you _were a bad boyfriend."

"I-I didn't _mean _that she was a bad girlfriend," Freddie muttered.

"Yeah, I _know _you didn't mean that," Carly said softly.

"But," Freddie said, looking up again. "She got me fired from the Pear store! You have to admit, that was rotten of her!"

"Um, did you _hear _yourself while you were working there?" Carly asked. "You insulted the customers, and quite frankly, you weren't too much of a salesman. Sam didn't do anything to you but take a job there."

"I-You-" Freddie stammered, looking for an argument.

"Freddie," Carly asked seriously. "Why _have _you been acting so different to Sam lately? I mean, the first few months after you broke up, you guys were fine, but lately...is-is it because, maybe, you-you're starting to regret the break-up?"

"No," Freddie said, though the look on his face told another story.

"But don't you think that could be why you've been insulting Sam the whole way home?" Carly asked knowingly. "Because you were so upset that she was with Cory?"

"I don't know...no!"

"Look," Carly said understandingly. "Honestly, I don't think Sam likes Cory too much. Who knows, after their date today, Sam might call it quits with him. And then, if you stop acting like a total jerk to her, maybe she'll be up for giving you another shot."

Freddie pondered this. At the mere suggestion of getting another chance with Sam, his insides seemed to roar with happiness. But then again, this was Sam Puckett. Would she even _give _him another shot.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Carls," Freddie said, turning to leave the apartment. He had some serious thinking to do.

...

The next morning at school, Freddie had just shut his locker after putting some books in it. As he turned around, he saw Cory, leaning on the set of lockers across from him. Freddie felt his fists clench.

After a long night of thinking the whole situation over, trying to deny the true reason why Sam being with Cory bothered him so much, he realized that he really should've seen this coming. True, while Cory was the first boy that Sam had dated since him, he should've known that the fact that some guy would take the opportunity and ask her out was inevitable. He knew that many guys thought she was hot, though most of them were admittedly too afraid to ask her out.

"What'cha looking at Benson?" Cory called across the hall suddenly, snapping him out of his thoughts. He didn't realize he had been staring at Cory so long.

"Oh, er, nothing," Freddie said quickly, trying to keep his voice level.

"Yeah, right, nothing," Cory laughed, looking at a few of his soccer friends who were standing with him. "More like he's upset I took his girlfriend."

His friends laughed and Freddie felt his his blood boil and before he could stop himself, he said, "Yeah, well, I've heard she's not too happy being with you!"

That certainly wiped the smirk off of Cory's face.

"What did you just say to me?" Cory said, stepping over to Freddie.

"I-um," Freddie stammered. He forgot just how big Cory was. He was easily a foot taller than him and even though Freddie had bulked up over the years, Cory's muscles made his own arms look like nothing less than toothpicks. Still though, he somehow found the courage to say, "You heard me."

He heard Cory's friends and a few onlookers gasp.

"Oh, so you think you're a tough guy now?" Cory said, cracking his knuckles menacingly. "Well how about we settle this the old fashion way?"

Fight Cory Hampton? That was crazy! Freddie knew he wouldn't last two minutes with the guy, _plus, _if any teacher caught him fighting, his permanent record would be scathed, and he could kiss any Ivy League college goodbye.

But then, just as he was preparing to make a run for it, he saw Sam's face in the crowd.

"Yeah, okay," Freddie said, trying to sound tougher than he felt and preparing himself for the beating he knew was about to come. "Let's fight."

...

"Was it really that bad?" Carly asked Sam as the girls walked into the school.

"Absolute worst date in history," Sam said. "I'm dumping him today. Hey, you think he'll cry? I love it when guys cry; it's so funny!"

"I wonder what's going on over there," Carly said, looking over at a crowd of people near Freddie's locker.

"Maybe it's a fight!" Sam said hopefully. "Come on, let's go!"

Sam dragged Carly over to the crowd and craned her neck to see what was going on.

"Oh my God!" Carly said when she spotted Freddie and Cory. "Are they fighting?"

"It looks like they're gonna," Sam said, cringing for the first time at the thought of a fight. "Why? What would Frednub have done to get Cory so mad?"

"Sam! Isn't it obvious!" Carly said excitedly. "It's over you!"

"What? Freddie doesn't even know I'm dating Cory," Sam pointed out. "Unless you..."

"I'm sorry, I tried to keep him from finding out, but he saw you guys yesterday," Carly said quickly. "But do you realize what this means? If Freddie's willing to risk getting his face smashed in by Cory, he _must _still have feelings for you!"

"Well that's too bad for him," Sam mumbled, still watching the two guys intently. "Because I don't have any for him."

Carly shook her head and sighed. She just _had _to pick the two most stubborn people in existence to be her best friends, didn't she?

The crowd began to cheer as Cory dropped his bag and pulled off his jacket, flexing his large muscles.

"They're really going to fight, aren't they?" Sam asked. "Freddie's going to get every bone in his body broken!"

"Why do you care?" Carly smirked. "I thought you didn't have feelings for him?"

But Sam had left her side and was making her way through the crowd to the two boys. Just as Cory was about to throw a punch at Freddie, Sam grabbed his arm.

"What are you doing?" she yelled at him.

"Stay out of this, babe," Cory snapped. "This is between me and him."

"Hey guess what, don't call me babe," Sam said. "We're done. Now get out of here."

"What?" Cory exclaimed. "You can't do that!"

"I just did," Sam retorted. "Now run along with your little soccer pals before I break your neck!"

"You wouldn't break-"

Sam cut him off by grabbing his arm and flipping him in a way only Sam Puckett could manage.

"You were saying?" Sam said, crossing her arms, satisfied, as she looked down at him moaning in pain on the floor.

Cory got to his feet and, his face red from embarrassment, and hurried off.

"Alright, nothing to see here," Sam said to the crowd. "Unless anybody else wants to get flipped?"

At once the crowd dispersed and Sam turned to Freddie, who had his back pressed against the lockers.

"Um, I, um, thanks," he stuttered.

"How stupid can you get?" Sam said, thumping him in the back of his head. "What made you think for two seconds that you could stand a chance against that guy? If you _want _your face punched into your skull, just ask, and I'll save you the trouble!"

"I-I couldn't help it," Freddie said.

"Why?" Sam scoffed. "Let me guess. You wanted to show off for Carly didn't you?"

"No," Freddie said. "You."

And before Sam could respond, Freddie had put his hands on her waist and pressed his lips to hers.

"Me?" Sam asked when they pulled away.

Freddie nodded. "I'm sorry, Sam. I know I've been acting like a complete jerk to you these past few months. I-I guess it was just getting hard to see you everyday and realize that we weren't together anymore."

Sam rose an eyebrow. "So your solution was to get creamed by Cory?"

"Um, pretty much," Freddie nodded.

Sam shrugged. "Okay. That'll work." And with that she pulled Freddie's lips back against hers.


	172. Chapter 172

_Sphere_

"Aw, man, they forgot the spinach," T-Bo moaned as he opened up the box of pizza.

"So? Who puts spinach on their pizza anyway?" Freddie shrugged as him, Spencer and Gibby all grabbed pieces from the box.

"Well how else am I supposed to get my weekly serving of veggies?" T-Bo asked.

"At least they remembered the anchovies on my part," Gibby said happily.

"Gross, how can you stand to eat those salty little fish?" Freddie asked as he began to carefully pour red pepper flakes and parmesan cheese onto his slice of pizza.

"Um, they're delicious, especially if you eat them with a side of humus," Gibby said.

"And yet...girls throw themselves at you," Freddie said, shaking his head in disbelief.

"They can't resist the Gibby," Gibby said, digging into his pizza.

"So what are we even going to do tonight anyway?" T-Bo asked. "I thought we were supposed to have a dude's night?"

"We are," Spencer said. "You haven't been having fun?"

"All I've done is sit here and watch you pathetic fools play game sphere for three hours," T-Bo said. "This is the first night in three weeks I've been out! Mrs. Benson's been making me help her sort out her knitting yarn!"

"Why don't you just say no?" Spencer asked.

"Um, those knitting needles of hers are pretty sharp," Freddie said. "Man, I remember when that used to be my job. That's one of the _many _reasons I'm glad I moved out."

"Yeah, thanks for that," T-Bo snapped. "Now, in addition to her lectures on my 'lack of personal hygiene', I have to listen to that batty woman cry about how her 'darling little Freddikins moved out and left her all on her own'!"

"Sorry," Freddie said. "But come on, can you blame me? I'm twenty-two years old, I just got a great new job at the Pear company...it had to happen!"

"Does she know you moved in with Sam yet?" Gibby asked.

"What?" Spencer exclaimed. "You moved in with Sam?"

"Um, yeah," Freddie said, glaring at Gibby. "And I _told _you not to mention that to him, Gibby!"

"Hey, I'm just trying to eat some anchovies," Gibby said.

"Wait, wait," Spencer said. "Sam's apartment only has one bedroom. How can you be living with her?"

"Oh, well, you see," Freddie stammered. "I-um, we-"

"Do you sleep on the couch?" Spencer asked. "Or do you-Ah!" he let out a gasp as a look of understanding came onto his face.

"Look, Spencer-" Freddie started, slowing inching himself away from the man.

"_Now_ things are starting to get interesting," T-Bo said, taking a satisfied swig of his Mountain Fizz as he watched the scene in front of him.

"There had _better _bunk beds in that room!" Spencer exclaimed.

"Spencer," Freddie said. "Sam and I are both adults and-"

"Are there bunk beds or not?"

"Um...no," Freddie said.

"How-You-No!" Spencer cried. "No! Now I've got images, and how _dare_ you? I always thought you were a _gentleman! _You're just a-a-_non_-gentleman, yeah. A non-gentleman."

"A non-gentleman?" Freddie repeated.

"Yes," Spencer said firmly.

"I'm confused," Gibby frowned. "What's being a gentleman have to do with bunk beds?"

"There's just _so _much not right about you," T-Bo said, shaking his head.

"Look, Spencer, I'm really sorry you had to find out about it this way," Freddie said. "I know you're just as protective of Sam as you are Carly. But...it's me. Do you really think I'm going to hurt Sam in anyway? We decided to move in together because we love each other."

Spencer mumbled something under his breath.

"Alright, I get it, you need some time to accept the idea," Freddie said. "But in the meantime, just please don't mention this to my mom. She doesn't know, and you know how she'd react."

"Well that's _exactly _what I'll do," Spencer said, getting to his feet. "Maybe your wise mother can put a stop to this-this...monkey business!"

"So now there are monkeys?" Gibby frowned. "I'm so lost!"

"What? No!" Freddie exclaimed jumping up and blocking the door. "Spencer! She'll freak out even worse than you! She _hates _Sam! This could make my mom do something crazy! Worse than just making me move out of Sam's place!"

"But-you-and Sam-and-Ah!" Spencer moaned.

"I'm sorry, okay, Spencer?" Freddie pleaded. "But just don't tell her, okay? I thought you liked me and Sam dating anyway?"

"Yes, _dating_," Spencer nodded. "As in you take her out to a lovely dinner, walk her home to her apartment, where she lives _alone_, and give a polite kiss on the cheek good night."

"A kiss on the cheek?" Freddie frowned.

"Man, what decade are you from?" T-Bo asked.

"Spencer, please don't tell my mom about this, okay?" Freddie said desperately. "I know that she doesn't control me anymore, but that won't stop her from breaking into Sam's apartment and forcing me to leave Sam."

"I-I-well, I don't want you to _leave _her," Spencer mumbled. "Fine, I won't say anything to her."

"Thanks," Freddie sighed. "And listen, I'm really sorry you had to find out about it this way. Sam and I just knew you'd probably react this way, that's why we didn't want to tell you right now. We thought you'd be happier not knowing!"

"Yeah, I was," Spencer said. "And so I'm going to continue pretending that I don't know."

"Um, sure, let's do that," Freddie shrugged, sitting back down next to Gibby.

"Aw man, so now the drama's over?" T-Bo groaned.

"Hey, if it will solve anything, I can give you the old bunk bed me and Guppy used to share, Freddie," Gibby said. "Though I still don't get why you not having one gave Spencer such a heart attack."


	173. Chapter 173

**AN-This oneshot is a continuation of the oneshot where Sam and Carly went out for a girls night and met up with a girl from school who called Freddie ugly, which led to Sam calling Freddie hot (ch156).**

**...**

_Common_

"We're back," Carly said as her and Sam walked back into the Shay's apartment.

"I thought you guys were going to hang out all night," Freddie frowned, looking at his watch. "It's nine thirty."

"Yeah, well, we ran into Jenna Whaler from school," Carly explained as she headed to the computer at the kitchen counter.

"I told you going out for frozen yogurt was a bad idea," Sam said, throwing herself onto the couch. "If we had gone to that new restaurant that deep fries everything on the menu, we'd still be out having fun."

"Yes, and tomorrow we'd wake up in the hospital," Carly said.

"You know, I sort of feel bad for Jenna," Freddie said. "I mean, she doesn't have any friends, and everyone hates her...maybe we should try being nice to her."

"She said you were ugly," Carly said.

"What?" Freddie exclaimed. "That's-She's so-Well! I'm not gonna try and be _her _friend anymore! She can just go one being the most hated girl in Ridgeway! Calling me ugly..."

"Well, it's not exactly untrue," Sam shrugged.

Carly frowned but didn't say anything.

"Sam!" Freddie said indignantly.

"Oh calm down, I might've been kidding," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Maybe."

"Hey, look!" Carly said from her computer, before Freddie could respond. "Jenna just posted on Splashface that somebody keyed her car! She put up a picture too...hey, it was taken in the yogurt place's parking lot."

"Good, she got what she deserved," Freddie said, satisfied.

Carly looked at Sam. "Um, please tell me this had nothing to do with those ten minutes you spent outside trying to call your mom."

"What, you think I keyed that chick's car?" Sam scoffed.

"Yeah, if Jenna was going around calling me ugly, Sam probably hugged her, not keyed her car," Freddie said.

"Actually," Carly said. "When Jenna said that, Sam-ow!" Sam had just elbowed her in the ribs.

"Well, at least I know the universe is looking out for me," Freddie said, not noticing what had just happened. "I feel bad for the car, though. That was a mint condition 1964 punchbuggy. They're pretty rare."

"Yeah, rare," Carly said, massaging her ribs. "Hey, Freddie? Can you leave?"

"Why?" Freddie frowned.

"Um, because I have to tell Sam about your...surprise party," she replied lamely.

"Well, it's not much of a surprise now," Freddie said. "And my birthday was three months ago, so-"

"Just go!" Carly said.

"Fine," Freddie sighed. "Just kick me out. It's not like I have feelings or anything..."

"Thanks, bye!" Carly called.

She waited until Freddie had closed the door behind him before she turned to her best friend. "You keyed Jenna's car, didn't you?"

"No, I told you, I didn't!" Sam said. She started to head towards the fridge. "Did and Spencer finish up that chicken scampi?"

"You did key her car," Carly said firmly, stepping in front of the fridge. "And you did it because she called Freddie ugly, didn't you?"

"What? That's ridiculous!"

"Then why did you say that Freddie was hot at the yogurt place?" Carly asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I didn't," Sam mumbled.

"Yes, you did!" Carly exclaimed. "I heard you! You said that Jenna could never snag a hot guy like Freddie! Those were your exact words, Puckett!"

"I think _somebody's _yogurt must've been past its expiration date," Sam said. "And you know, Carly, it's not to uncommon for random people to key people's cars in parking lots. Yup, I'm sure that's what happened to Jenna..."

"Sam, you can't deny what you said," Carly said. "And you know what else is very common? People keying the cars of people they're mad at!"

"Or," Sam said. "A group of vandals went into the parking lot and-"

"Sam!"

"Okay, fine, yes, I keyed the car!" Sam said. "Are you happy?"

"Yes, I am," Carly said, satisfied. "And _why _did you key the car?"

"Because I hate Jenna, just like everyone else?"

"No..." Carly said, crossing her arms. "Because of what she said about Freddie, right?"

Sam said nothing.

"Right?" Carly said again.

"Yes, okay, yes!" Sam snapped. "But, before you get any ideas going in that head of yours about how I still have feelings for Freddie and how I regret breaking up with him, because those are both _so _not true, just know that I did it only for me!"

"For you?" Carly said, amused.

"Yes," Sam said. "As much as I'd like to deny it, everyone _does_ know that the nub and I used to go out. I'm not going to have the reputation as the girl who went out with a guy who was a total nerd _and _ugly!"

"Uh-huh," Carly nodded. "So that's the only reason you keyed her car?"

"Yup, the only reason," Sam said. "Now, I'm going upstairs so I can eat this chicken scampi in peace."

Carly chuckled and shook her head as Sam headed upstairs. "Yeah, the only reason. Right."


	174. Chapter 174

**AN-Whoo! Over 700 reviews! You guys are so awesome for keeping up with and supporting this story for so many chapters, thank you all so much!**

**And also...I know a lot of you are fans of Victorious and probably know that the show is ending soon. If you go onto the Victorious page on this site, there's a story called Let's Save Victorious! by StrawberryAngel143 that's working to hopefully try and get Nickelodeon to reconsider canceling the show. I urge you all to check it out!**

**...**

_Phenomenon_

"But why can't we come?" Tyler, Sam and Freddie's nine-year old son moaned as he sat on his parents bed, watching his mother pack a large suitcase.

"Because," Sam said, cramming a few Fat Cakes into the suitcase. "Your dad and I need a break."

"Why?"

"Because you four kids drive us crazy," Sam replied.

"We do?"

"Yup," Sam smiled. "But we still love you guys. We just want to spend a little bit of time alone. Just the two of us."

"But I still want to go on a vacation," Tyler pouted.

"I know, kiddo," Sam said, closing her suitcase. "But if it makes you feel any better, I'm not too crazy about about the place we're going. Your dad picked it out."

"What's wrong with the place I picked?" Freddie asked, coming into the room. "It's Washington's national park! It's full of all sorts of natural phenomenons!"

"You'd think after being married to you for eighteen years, I would've had more of an effect on you," Sam said, shaking her head. "But you're still the same old nub from high school, aren't you?"

"And you're still the aggressive she-demon, aren't you?" Freddie smiled, giving his wife a quick kiss.

"Gross!" Tyler cringed.

Sam chucked and rolled her eyes as her and Freddie pulled apart.

"What are you guys going to do on your vacation?" Tyler asked. "Aren't you going to be bored all by yourselves?"

"Nah, I think we'll figure out a way to stay entertained," Sam laughed, looking over at Freddie.

"Yeah, we will," Freddie grinned.

"How?" Tyler asked.

"Um, why don't you go downstairs, Tyler?" Sam said quickly.

"Fine," the nine-year old moaned.

"So," Freddie said as his son left the room. "You've got everything all packed?"

"Yup," Sam nodded. "Are we all set to go?"

"Uh-huh," Freddie said. "A whole week by ourselves. Just the two of us. Aren't you excited?"

"Yeah," Sam said. "It's just...are you sure the kids will be alright without us?"

"Yes, Sam," Freddie smiled. "Baby, they'll be fine. Look, the place is only about a two hour drive from here. If anything _does _happen, which it won't, we can come back right away."

"Okay," Sam sighed.

"Who'd have ever thought that _you'd _be the overly-protective parent," Freddie laughed as he heaved the suitcase off the bed.

"I'm not overly-protective," Sam snapped. "Now come on, let's go."

The couple headed downstairs, where their four children were sitting in the living room.

"All right," Sam said, picking up the remote and turning off the television, getting the kids' attention. "Your dad and I are about to head out."

"We left you money for food in the kitchen," Freddie said. "Now, while we're gone, Jason's going to be in charge-"

"No!" Emma, the couple's thirteen-year old moaned. "Why him?"

"Because I'm the oldest, genius," Jason grinned. "Don't worry, mom and dad, I'll keep everything going smoothly here."

"Good," Sam said. "Because since you're in charge, you get to drive Tyler to all of his football practices, Ashton to all of her student government things, and Emma to all her track practices."

"What?" Jason exclaimed. "I have to do all that?"

"Well, we got you that car for a reason," Freddie said. "Oh, and if we find out you've been abusing your responsibilities by torturing your younger siblings, we'll be taking your keys the second we get home."

"What's the fun of being in charge if I don't get to boss people around?" Jason mumbled.

"Exactly what I've been wondering for the past seventeen years," Sam told him. "Okay, Carly will be dropping by every now and then to make sure you guys are fine. Both of us will have our phones on the whole time, so call us if you need something."

After Sam and Freddie hugged and kissed their children goodbye, they got into their car and began driving to their hotel.

"Wow," Freddie said when they arrived two hours later. "This room is pretty nice."

"Yeah, considering it's right next to the lamest tourist trap in Washington," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Oh come on, it's full of history and culture!" Freddie said. "So how about you and I go look around?"

"What?" Sam said, looking up from her pearphone. "Oh, um, sure, baby."

"Who are you calling?" Freddie asked.

"I just want to check on the kids," Sam said, pressing the phone to her ear.

"Sam, we've been gone two hours," Freddie said, amused. "I think they're fine."

"I want to make sure," Sam said as the phone began to ring. "I want to just see if they found the money we left them for food and that they know that if they decide to throw any wild parties, I'll ground them until next November. And I was going to tell Jason to make sure that Emma and Ashton don't have any boys over, but if you don't want me to call..."

"Call them." Freddie said firmly. "Call them right now."

Sam chuckled, knowing that last part would persuade her husband.

"Hello?" Ashton said on the other end.

"Ash, hi, we just wanted to check up on you guys," Sam said.

"But it's only been two hours," Ashton pointed out.

"Yeah...but is everything okay there?" Sam asked.

"Um, sure. Jason just went to the store with Tyler to buy some dinner," Ashton replied. "So it's just me and Emma here. I think she's in the kitchen eating your special pork chips."

"My pork chips?" Sam exclaimed. "Those are mine!"

"Sam, I'll buy you more pork chips," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "And mention the 'no boys' thing! That's important!"

"Fine, she can eat the pork chips," Sam sighed. "Just behave. Oh, yeah, and your dad said something about no boys in the house or whatever. I'll talk to you later."

"Okay, you checked on them, they're fine, just like I said they would be," Freddie said. "So let's go to the park now. There's supposed to be a really old beaver dam we can look at!"

"As...wonderfully lame as that sounds," Sam said, tossing her phone down on a nearby chair. "Wasn't the whole point of coming here to...you know?"

"Oh...I see," Freddie grinned as Sam threw her arms around his neck. He gave her a quick kiss. "Don't worry, baby, we'll order in room service as soon as we get back from the beaver dam."

"Unbelievable," Sam sighed, shaking her head as she reluctantly followed her husband out of the room.

...

"Hey," Carly smiled as Sam and Freddie walked back into their house one week later. "How was your little couples vacation."

"Fun," Freddie said. "We learned a lot about Washington's history. Man, can I plan a romantic getaway or what?"

"I'm so sorry," Carly whispered to Sam as Freddie set the suitcase down.

"Eh, it wasn't all bad," Sam shrugged. "I got to buy a chocolate beaver, and then we did...other stuff."

"Okay, getting a little more information than I wanted there," Carly laughed. "But I'm glad you guys had fun. I just stopped by to try and help out by doing some laundry for you."

"Wow, thanks, Carls," Freddie said.

"So, where are the kids?" Sam asked.

"Oh, I dropped Emma and Ashton off with Clarissa at the movies," Carly said. "And Jason took Tyler to football practice. Did you miss them?"

"Like crazy, believe it or not," Freddie said. "Though Sam here was worse than me."

"Oh yeah, Jason told me you kept calling like, every hour, Sam," Carly said, smiling at her best friend. "He said you stopped after two days, though."

"Yeah, speaking of which," Sam said turning to Freddie, her hand outstretched. "I'll take my phone back now, Freddud."

"Here you go," Freddie said, tossing his wife her phone back.

"You took her phone?" Carly said.

"I had no choice!"


	175. Chapter 175

**AN- This is oneshot goes with the oneshot I wrote about Freddie singing the love song to Sam on iCarly (ch146)**

_Bending_

"Alright, Gio, let's go for the usual," Pam Puckett said as her masseuse walked in. "My back's been aching all week. Guess I can't go bending over to pick up change underneath the bus seats anymore."

"Of course," Gio nodded. "And, um, you _are _going to call my brother back about that date, right? Otherwise, I feel like it's a bit inappropriate for me to keep giving you these free massages."

"Yeah, I told you, I'd call him," Pam said. "Just as soon as the phone company decides to give service back to my block."

"Good," Gio said as he began to massage Pam. "Oh, and I see that rash has gone away from last month."

"Yup, thanks again for the ointment," she said. She glanced over at the small clock in the office. "Oh, chiz, I forgot! Hey, Gio? You think you could pull up a website for me on that computer over there? I'm wanted to watch my daughter on this web show that she does, part of this new 'better parenting' kick I've been on for the past year...The site's called, oh, dang it! What was it again...oh! !"

"You're daughter's on iCarly?" Gio said excitedly as he pulled up the website. "I never knew that. I _love _that web show! Which of the girls is yours? Carly or Sam?"

"Sam," Pam replied.

"Should've known," Gio said. "Oh, look! They're doing Super Bra!"

Pam continued to watch the web show as Gio massaged her. She had to admit, in the year it had been since she finally started watching, it had never failed to make her laugh. She always felt a surge of pride when she was her daughter doing the various skits of the show. Of course, being a Puckett, she wasn't very skilled in telling Sam that, but she hoped that her daughter knew anyway.

"You know," Gio said, continuing to rub Pam's back. "If I was to get some, say...autographs from iCarly, maybe I could through in a free salt scrub next time you're in town."

"Now you're talking, Gio," Pam said. "I'll get them for you right when I get back to Seattle. Speaking of which, I hope Sam found that note I left her telling her I was coming to Olympia for the weekend..."

"Hey, what's that Freddie kid doing now?" Gio frowned, looking at the screen.

Pam looked up and saw that Freddie Benson was now standing in the middle of the studio where Carly and Sam usually stood.

Freddie Benson.

Pam knew that he had dated her daughter for a month. And though Sam never exactly sat down and told her that she really liked this boy (the therapy sessions that the two of them occasionally attended thanks to Carly _did _help improve their relationship; however, feelings were still an iffy subject for either of them to discuss openly), Pam knew for a fact that never, in all the years that she had known her daughter, that Sam had never been happier than she was during that month. Unfortunately, Pam also noticed that in the weeks after her and Freddie broke up, Sam was more sullen looking than she could ever recall. Again, Sam never said anything directly to Pam to give any indication once so ever that she _was_ upset, but the maternal instinct in Pam (the one that sometimes appeared to go on vacations) told her that her daughter had had her heart broken for the first time.

Pam had thought about trying to comfort Sam those nights when she saw her laying on the couch in the middle of the night, eating cold fried chicken, staring blankly at the T.V. screen, but she had never been good with words.

So as Pam stared at the boy on the computer screen, she wondered whether or not Sam had ever gotten over him. She doubted it.

"What's that kid doing?" Gio frowned. "Is that music playing? Is he singing?"

"Hang on, I think he just said Sam's name," Pam said. "Turn it up!"

Gio hurried to turn up the volume, just in time for Pam to hear the last verse of the song Freddie had been singing.

"Holy sweet chiz," Gio said. "Is that kid singing your daughter a love song?"

"I think...he is," Pam said, staring intently at the screen. "Shh, shh! She just cut him off."

"Oh, I love teenage drama," Gio said. "So does my brother...seriously, you should call him and-"

"Can it, massage man!" Pam snapped. "Wait, they're talking...now they're leaning...oh."

"Ah! They're back together again!" Gio cheered, clapping his hands. "I'm so excited. I have to go update my blog now, excuse me!"

Pam stared at Sam's face as she pulled away from Freddie, and she saw it again. That happiness, that smile that had accompanied her daughter that entire month. It was back.

"Nice job, kid," Pam whispered. "Nice job."

...

One week later, after Pam Puckett's trip to Olympia was over, she returned back to her home. When she opened her house door, she saw Sam curled up in an armchair, texting away on her pearphone.

"I'm back!" Pam said, throwing her bag carelessly on the ground.

"Oh, hey," Sam said, looking up from her phone for a second.

"So, did you eat the food I left for you while I was gone?" Pam asked.

"You left three pears and a jar of mayonnaise," Sam frowned.

"The mayonnaise goes on the pears," Pam told her.

"Yeah...I just threw the pears at the house across the street," Sam shrugged. "I ate at Carly's, anyway."

"Oh, good," Pam nodded. "Don't you look hot in that dress? Nearly as hot as I look in that green bikini."

"Gee, thanks," Sam cringed.

"I take it you're going out, since you're all dolled up?"

"Yup," Sam nodded.

"With...that Benson boy?"

Sam frowned. "How'd you know that?"

"Hey, I keep up-to-date," Pam said. "I saw that whole thing on iCarly."

"You-You still watch iCarly?" Sam asked, looking slightly taken back.

"Sure!" Pam said. "Speaking of which, I'm gonna need you and Carly and Freddie to sign some autographs for me so I can get a salt scrub, but we'll deal with that later. So, you're back with the nub, huh?"

"Um, yeah," Sam said.

Pam could see that the corners of Sam's mouth were straining not to turn up in a smile.

"Well...good," Pam said. "Smart, making him want you back. At least you can hopefully keep him around for more than a few years, not like me."

"Yeah, hopefully," Sam said. "Um, well, I guess I'll head out now."

"Alright," Pam nodded. "Oh, wait! I think I'm supposed to tell you something about a curfew...eh, who am I kidding? Just make sure you either sleep at Carly's place or come back here before it's _too _late. Hmm, that seemed like a responsible parent type thing for me to say, didn't it?"

"Yeah, yeah," Sam said, grabbing her purse. "See you, mom." Sam turned to head to the door.

"Hold on, wait," Pam said suddenly.

Sam looked back.

"I'm-I'm really happy for you, kid," Pam smiled. "You deserve this. And that Benson...he's a lucky kid."

Sam laughed. "Well, duh. He gets to date _me_."

Pam chuckled. "Just have fun tonight, Sammy.

"Um, thanks," Sam said. "Bye."

Pam watched as she headed out the door.

"Well," Pam sighed. "At least she seems to have better luck with guys than I do."


	176. Chapter 176

_Sixth_

"How is he doing it?" Freddie frowned, sipping his smoothie as he watched Gibby talking to his fifth girl of the night. "How? _How? _He's Gibby? What makes him so appealing to hot girls?"

"No idea," Sam said, shaking her head.

"It's frightening," Carly agreed.

"Is it the kaki pants?" Freddie asked, still looking on at the scene as the red head Gibby was talking to handed him a slip of paper that most likely had her phone number on it. "Or the hair? What? What is it?"

"Um, you know, you _do _have a girlfriend of your own," Sam said irritably, rolling her eyes.

"Oh, yeah, I know," Freddie said quickly. "And you're ten times hotter than _any _girl Gibby's talked to tonight."

"Smooth save there," Sam said, grabbing his smoothie out of his had and taking a sip of it.

"He's coming back now," Carly said.

"Hey, do you think those corn dogs T-Bo's selling are low-carb?" Gibby asked, taking his seat next to Freddie.

"Why? Need to watch your figure for all these girls you've been chatting up?" Carly grinned.

"Yeah, seriously, what's up with that?" Sam frowned. "I mean, sure, I know girls have had some weird attraction to you before, but this is insane!"

"Oh, it's all thanks to this," Gibby said, pulling a notebook out of his backpack. "It's this book of moves to get girls that Guppy gave to me."

"Guppy?" Freddie repeated. "What?"

"What's wrong with that?" Gibby asked.

"Um, nothing, just that he's your nine-year old little brother," Carly said.

"He just turned ten, thank you," Gibby defended.

"Yeah, that makes it better," Sam scoffed.

"Hey, that kid knows what he's doing," Gibby said. "He's the most popular fourth-grade boy at his elementary school. All the girls always want to share their snacks with him, and they fight over who gets him as their reading partner."

"That's...disturbing," Freddie said. He picked up the notebook and flipped through it. "But still, there's no way this stuff can be getting all these girls to talk to you."

"True chiz," Gibby said. "That book is foolproof."

"No way," Sam said, looking over her boyfriend's shoulder. "No girl is stupid enough to fall for this stuff."

"Seriously," Carly agreed as she craned her neck to see the book. "They'd have to have like, zero brain cells."

"I'm telling you, this book has never failed me once," Gibby said. "You saw that red head I was just talking to? I got her to agree to come with me to my landscaping class with me next Friday night."

"I don't believe it," Freddie said firmly.

"Try it out yourself," Gibby shrugged. "Go up to any girl in here and talk to her using a move from this book."

"Um, in case you've forgotten, Gibby, I'm going out with Sam," Freddie said. "I can't go and hit on girls!"

"You know what," Sam said thoughtfully. "Do it, baby."

"Wait, what?" Freddie frowned.

"Do it," Sam told him. "See if it works."

"No way, I don't want to hit on any girls!" Freddie said.

"Oh come on," Sam said. "You're not _actually _going to be hitting on them. You're just testing Gibby's insane book here. Besides, we both know it's not going to work. Whichever girl you try this out on will just laugh in your face. It will be just like the old times!"

"I don't know," Freddie said. "Are you sure you won't mind?"

"Freddie, _I'm _the one telling you to do it," Sam said. "And like I said, it's not going to work anyway!"

"Yes it will," Gibby said.

"Okay, fine, I'll hit on a girl," Freddie sighed in defeat. "But I won't like it!"

"Thank you, baby," Sam smiled.

"There's a girl over there," Carly said, spotting a girl sitting by herself a few tables away from them. "Why don't you try her?"

"Alright," Freddie said. He flipped through the book the book. "What should I try...?"

"Oh, try something from the sixth chapter," Gibby suggested. "That's the good stuff."

"Okay then," Freddie nodded. "I'll try the...lost dog move."

"I can't believe you're letting him go over there and hit on that girl," Carly said to Sam and Freddie went over to the girl's table.

"Carly, relax, she's going to shoot him down," Sam laughed. "Just watch. Oh, look! He's talking!"

"Um, hi," they heard Freddie say, taking a seat across from the girl.

"Um, hello?" the girl said, looking up at the stranger that just sat down with her. "Can I help you?"

"I wish," Freddie sighed. "I've spent all day looking for my dog."

"Is he lost?" the girl asked.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "I was walking with him in the park, and then I saw a cat in a tree, so I went to help it down, and when I got back, my dog was gone!"

"That's so sad," the girl said. "I know just how you feel."

"You lost your dog too?" Freddie asked.

"No, I saw a movie about a kid who did," she replied.

"Right," Freddie frowned.

"Well, what was your dog's name?"

"Um...Spot, yeah, Spot," Freddie said quickly. "And I've had him since he was a puppy. He's sort of my best friend. I don't know _what _I'm going to do if I can't find him."

"Sam," Carly frowned as the three continued to watch the scene. "I-I think it might be working."

"I told you so," Gibby said.

"N-No," Sam shook her head. "That chick's just interested in the dog. You'll see."

"Well maybe I could help you look for your dog," the girl said, scooting her seat closer to Freddie.

"Really? That-That would be great," Freddie said. "And, um, maybe afterwards we could go get some coffee and grab a bite to eat?"

"Sam?" Carly said worriedly. "I don't think she'd interested in just the dog anymore."

"No, just watch," Sam said, though she was now frowning. "She's going to turn him down right now...I think."

"Sure," the girl smiled at Freddie, putting her hand on top of his on the table. "That sounds really fun. You know, you seem like a sweet guy."

"Crab," Sam mumbled standing up. "I'll be back."

"Sam, don't hurt her!" Carly hissed as Sam walked towards the table.

"Um, well, I-I guess,' Freddie said, quickly removing his hand from under her. "But actually, I-"

"Okay, show's over," Sam said firmly glaring at the girl who was far too close to her boyfriend.

"Who are you?" the girl snapped, standing up.

"I'm his girlfriend," Sam said intimidatingly. "So you have about five seconds to grab your smoothie and beat it before I take it pour it all over that nice little white dress you're wearing."

"Sam, don't-" Freddie started.

"Excuse me? His girlfriend?" the girl scoffed. "Please. Him and I were just about to go out and look for his lost dog and then we were gonna go out and get coffee!"

"You're in idiot," Sam said, crossing her arms. "He doesn't have a dog! You just got played using some lame move that a ten-year old came up with!"

"What? That's crazy," the girl said.

"And if you had any common sense," Sam said, stepping closer. "You'd leave now."

"I-But-" she looked at Freddie, but he was just staring at Sam with a grin on his face.

With a huff of indignation, the girl grabbed her smoothie and stormed out.

"Wow, Sam," Freddie said, amused. "I like seeing you all feisty."

"Shut up, nub," Sam snapped.

"Oh come on, you can't be mad a me," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "You made me hit on her! I was forced!"

"Yeah, well," Sam said, as the couple rejoined Carly and Gibby at their table. "Next time don't listen to me!"

"Got it," Freddie chuckled. "So," Gibby said. "Who was right about the book? Gibby was!"

"I still can't believe that," Carly frowned. "Are girls really that stupid to fall for all that?"

"No, I mean, we wouldn't fall for any of that," Sam pointed out. "But then again, what do I know? Look what I'm dating."

"Hey!" Freddie said.

"I'm telling you, this book is gold," Gibby said proudly. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to find a date for my bunion scraping next week..."

**...**

**AN-**

**Well, if you read my other fic, iStart my life, then you probably already heard this, but if not...I'm leaving for college tomorrow, which means that it's going to be a lot harder for me to update as frequently, seeing as I'll have a heavy course load. THIS DOES NOT MEAN THAT I AM DISCONTINUING THIS STORY, but it does mean that these daily updates won't be going on much longer. I do have quite a few oneshots already written, so I will be updating daily until I run out, but after that, I'm going to have to go back to updating only about once a week. I really appreciate all of you following and supporting this story so much. You guys all really make it a lot easier for me to update! So I'm sorry that the daily updates will be ending soon, but there are still plenty more oneshots to come!**

**And again, if you have requests, feel free to send them in, but just so everyone knows, as of right now, there are currently 33 requests I have after this one, so just know that if you send me a request, it will get written, but since I take requests in the order that I get them to be fair, it may take some time. I'm not saying this to try and discourage requests, like I said, I love them, and if you have any please send me them! I just wanted to make you all knew to see the request like the day after you send it :) **


	177. Chapter 177

**AN-Hey, sorry I didn't update yesterday, even though I promised a few more daily updates. I just got my computer hooked up to the Internet in my dorm. Thanks so much for all of the good luck wishes, I love you guys!**

_..._

_Intent_

"Oh come on! Not again!" Carly moaned as her webpage on her laptop disappeared for the forth time in less than an hour. "The stupid wi-fi went out again!"

"I know," Freddie sighed, who had been working on his laptop next to her. "It's been acting wonky all over the building."

"Ugh, come on, stupid laptop!" Carly said, shaking her computer's screen. "Do you _want _to frustrate me? Is that your intent? Huh? Because it's working!"

"No need to you yell at your computer, Carly, it's not its fault," Freddie said. "It's probably stupid BU&U. You should call them and tell them about the wi-fi problem."

"Yeah, I will," Carly huffed, sitting up. She looked over at Sam, who was still working on her laptop as she listened to her pearpod.

"Yo, Puckett!" Carly said, throwing a cushion at Sam to get her best friend's attention.

"What?" Sam asked, pulling her headphones out.

"What are you doing on your computer without Internet?" Carly asked.

"I have Internet," Sam said. "I'm on the zoo's website. They're about to feed the lions twenty pounds of raw meat!"

"How can you have Internet, the wi-fi keeps going out?" Freddie said.

"Yeah, I know," Sam said. "Which is why I hacked into the wi-fi from the building across the street the second time that happened."

"You hacked?" Carly frowned. "Isn't that sort of illegal?"

"Oh come on, everyone does it," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Besides, I wouldn't have to if your building's wi-fi wasn't so jank!"

"Hold on," Freddie said. "How do _you _know how to hack into the other building's wi-fi? That requires an actual knowledge of computers."

"So what? You're calling me stupid?" Sam snapped.

"When it comes to computers, absolutely," Freddie nodded.

"Hey!" Sam retorted. "I _am _good with computers, you know! I'm not _obsessed _with them like your nubby self, but I'm not a total idiot with them!"

"Okay, um, guys?" Carly said, hoping to break up this argument before it went too far. "Why don't we just go down to the Groovy Smoothie and use the wi-fi there? That way we can get online without any illegal hacking or-"

"Oh come on!" Freddie cut her off. "Last week you spent three hours trying to back up your hard drive!"

"So I'm not good with the lame system things, so what?" Sam shrugged. "That's why we have nubs like you around, don't we? I'm good at the _important _things, like hacking into security cameras to erase certain videos that could incriminate certain people."

"Okay," Freddie said. "So basically you're only good at things if they're illegal."

"Hey I'm good at plenty of legal things!" Sam said.

"Like what?" Freddie scoffed.

"I don't need to list them for you, Benson!"

"Um, guys, why don't we just play a nice board game?" Carly asked desperately. "We can play-"

"That's because you can't list them," Freddie said with a triumphant smile.

"Freddie, was that really necessary?" Carly frowned.

"Well it's not like you have any talent besides being a geek who only has his little computers as friends," Sam snapped.

"Okay, you two! Time outs!" Carly exclaimed.

"What?" Sam frowned.

"You can't give us a time out," Freddie said. "We're not little kids who-"

"Couch! Both of you!" Carly said firmly. "Now!"

Reluctantly, the two sat on the couch.

"Now," Carly said, taking both their laptops and putting them on the counter. "You two are going to sit there silently. My eardrums can't take the yelling. I'm gonna go up and take a bubble bath, and I don't want to hear any arguing, are we clear?"

"You know, one of these days we should stop listening to her when she does this," Sam mumbled as Carly retreated upstairs.

"Yeah, one day," Freddie sighed.

The two sat in silence for a few moments.

"I'm sorry I said you were stupid about technology, Sam," Freddie said after about five minutes. "I just never would've thought you'd know how to hack into a secure wi-fi server."

"Yeah, well," Sam shrugged. "I do...And I guess I'm supposed to say I'm sorry about calling you a geek with only his computers as friends?"

"Thanks," Freddie chuckled. "So, um, how'd you learn to hack into things? It took me years before I could even hack into my Boy's Camp server and replace all of the athletic activities with educational ones."

"My mom dated this guy who worked for the government," Sam said. "He taught me a few things, before he went to prison for hacking into the president's secure accounts."

"Ah," Freddie nodded. "Um...listen, do-do you think you could show me how to do it?"

"What? Hack into the president's accounts?" Sam asked.

"No," Freddie said quickly. "I mean...how to hack into the wi-fi across the street?"

"What's this now?" Sam grinned. "Fredward Benson needs _my _help with a computer?"

"I've been trying to get their wi-fi for months now," Freddie admitted. "Ever since my mom blocked every site except the ones approved by her Aggressive Parenting group from ours. But I keep running into this one firewall..."

"Hmmm, I _guess _I can," Sam said thoughtfully. "On one condition."

"Er, sure," Freddie said. "What?"

"You have to let me switch your mom's special low-fat, low-sodium vegetarian deli meats in her fridge with real meat," Sam said.

"Sam, you know that would irritate her beyond belief," Freddie said.

"Yup."

"Fine," Freddie sighed.

"Good, make sure you get a video of her reaction when she finds out," Sam said. She got up and grabbed Freddie's laptop from the counter and opened it up. She began typing a few things on the keyboard.

"Wow," Freddie said, getting up and looking over her shoulder, impressed. "You're pretty good, aren't you?"

"Gee, don't sound so surprised," Sam said. "It should be done in a few minutes. I just have to get past this one thing..."

Freddie stared at the blonde typing away at his computer. He would've never guessed that Sam would be able to hack something he couldn't. He wondered what other hidden talents she might have. He'd have thought after dating the girl for over a month, he would've known these things, but it seemed that Sam Puckett was still full of mysteries.

"I can list them," he said suddenly.

"List what, nub?" Sam asked, not looking away from the screen.

"Your talents."

Sam looked up. "Huh?"

"You're really good at making people laugh," Freddie said. "You're good at drawing, even if most of your pictures involve me being tormented, you're good at acting, singing, and dancing. You're good at thinking up new ideas for iCarly, you're good at ki-kayaking."

"Kayaking?" Sam repeated.

"Y-Yeah," Freddie said quickly.

"Dude, I've never once kayaked," Sam said. "And I hate kayaking! Don't you remember? I threw our phones at a kayaker that one time?"

"Oh, right," Freddie said. "I forgot."

"Yeah, well," Sam said. "Um, I think I got you the wi-fi now." She handed Freddie his laptop.

"Thanks," Freddie said. "I'll go back to my place and test it out."

"Whatever," Sam said. "Kayaking...honestly!"

Freddie hurried out of the Shay's apartment, closing the door behind him.

He couldn't believe what he had almost said in there, and he was thankful he had been able to make a quick escape before Sam found out about it. He unlocked his apartment door.

Still, he thought to himself. Sam might not be much of a kayaker, but she is one good kisser


	178. Chapter 178

_Conducting_

"I don't know _what _they put in these Fat Shakes," Sam said as her and Carly climbed the bleachers of the community center's gym. "But it's the most magical thing I've ever tasted."

"Yes, but did you really have to shove that old man out of line?" Carly asked. "Haven't we had _many _discussions on conducting yourself nicely in public?"

"You know I don't listen to you when you're going on about all that garbage," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Hey, do you see Freddie anywhere?"

"How am I supposed to see anyone?" Carly asked. "Everyone's wearing their fencing masks or whatever they're called. All the fencers down there look exactly the same."

"Hold on, there he is over there," Sam said nodding over to a fencer near the benches.

"How can you tell?" Carly asked, amused.

"I just can," Sam shrugged, sipping her Fat Shake.

"Must be a boyfriend-girlfriend thing then," Carly laughed.

"The first round of the Seattle Fencing Competition is about to begin," said the announcer over his microphone, and the crowd began to cheer.

"Yeah!" Sam yelled. "Go Freddie!"

"Ow, Sam, that was my ear drum," Carly cringed. "It's really cute that you're so excited for Freddie to fence, but can you please not cause me hearing loss at seventeen?"

"Oh come on, this is the closest I can get to dating an athlete," Sam said. "Let me have this."

"Alright," Carly sighed, still rubbing her ears. "But next fencing match, I'm bringing earplugs..."

The girls watched as Freddie, who would be fencing in the first round, and his competitor, walk out onto the mat. They took their masks off to shake hands.

"Sam!" Carly gasped as Freddie's competitor took off his mask. "Is that-?"

"Yup," Sam nodded, frowning. "That's Jonah."

...

Freddie felt his blood pumping in anticipation for his first fencing match. He hadn't been in an official match since Spencer had first introduced him to the sport when he was thirteen, and his mother had beaten up Doug Toader for him.

But now, four years later, he had put in a lot of practice, his mom was away visiting her sister, Susan, and best of all, he had his loud, aggressive blonde girlfriend cheering for him in the crowd.

As the announcer announced his fight, he picked up his sword and headed to the mat, taking a quick look at Sam in the stands. Him and his opponent took off their masks to shake hands. But when Freddie saw the other fencer remove his mask to reveal his face, Freddie couldn't help but let out a gasp.

It was Jonah!

Sam's Jonah! The boy who Sam had gone out with for about two weeks back in the eighth grade before he tried to make a move on Carly while he was still dating her!

"I-I-You-" Freddie stuttered as Jonah approached him, his hand outstretched. "You fence?"

"Yup, took it up after the eighth grade," Jonah replied smugly. "You know, after I had a lot of free time on my hand when you and those other two humiliated me on that little web show of yours."

"You deserved that," Freddie told him, reluctantly shaking hands with only because the announcer was giving them a dirty look. He took care to squeeze Jonah's hand harder than he usually would. "You tried to cheat on Sam with her best friend."

"Yeah, well, two hot girls, one pair of lips," Jonah shrugged. "What would any guy do? And from what I've been hearing, you and Sam have become...more than friends. For now."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Freddie snapped.

"Oh come on," Jonah grinned. "After I cream you in our little fencing match, who do you think Sam will want to be with? Some loser? Or me, the guy who just won?"

"You can't seriously be thinking about getting back with Sam," Freddie hissed. "She wouldn't leave me for you!"

"We'll just see about that," Jonah said.

"There's no way-"

"Gentlemen!" the announcer said loudly, getting the two boys' attentions. "This is not the time for chit-chat! We have several matches to get through!"

"Oh, er, right," Freddie said, giving Jonah one last dirty look before sliding his mask back on and heading to his side of the mat.

He felt anger of boiling inside of him. How _dare _Jonah suggest that Sam would leave him and go running back to her cheating ex-boyfriend! And while Freddie felt confident enough that Sam Puckett surely wouldn't do such a thing, no matter what the outcome of the fencing match, he couldn't ignore the heightened urge he now had to win.

"En Guarde!" the announcer said, and the match began.

Freddie hated to admit it, but Jonah was actually a pretty good fencer. He was blocking all of Freddie's hits and it was all Freddie could do to block his.

Unfortunately, it seemed as if the anger that Jonah had ignited in Freddie was distracting him. Freddie could tell he was fencing far worse than he had been in practice lately, and after nearly a minute, Jonah got his first hit on Freddie.

Freddie stifled a moan, and resisted the urge to look up into the stands at Sam as the two returned to their starting positions.

Perhaps that was just the wake-up call he needed, for Freddie quickly tied the match up by getting a hit on Jonah just seconds after the match had resumed.

_Jerk thinks he can get Sam back_, Freddie thought to himself as him and Jonah's match continued. _She wouldn't leave me and go back to him_..._would she? No! No, of course, not! She loves me! We've been dating for months now, and he's not just going to waltz in and-" _

But then he felt Jonah's sword collide with his chest, giving Jonah a one point lead. He only needed one more hit and he would win the match.

Freddie was beginning to sweat through his mask. He couldn't let Jonah win. That guy was a complete scumbag, and he didn't deserve the glory of winning even one match. Freddie prepared himself for a hit as the Jonah began coming back towards Freddie.

_Come on, Benson,_ Freddie thought to himself as he successfully blocked a hit attempt by Jonah. _Don't let this guy get you. He hurt, Sam, remember; your Sam! He made her feel second-best and-_

But then Freddie felt his sword slip in his hand, and he couldn't block Jonah's sword in time as jabbed it into his chest.

He had won.

"Yeah!" Jonah cheered, pulling of his mask and pumping his fist in the air. "Whoo!"

Freddie dragged his feet to the benches, Jonah behind him, still cheering obnoxiously. He looked up at the stands, hoping to see Sam, but he couldn't spot her.

"You just got destroyed, Benson!" Jonah jeered. "Destroyed!"

Freddie didn't reply, he just threw his sword into his bag and began taking off the rest of his gear.

"Hey."

He turned around and saw Sam. She must've headed down the second the match ended.

"Hey," he replied glumly.

"Baby, you did...okay, I think this is one of those times where I'm supposed to lie to protect your feelings, right?" she asked.

"I know I sucked, Sam," Freddie sighed. "I was so much worse than I was in practice. I guess I just let Jonah psyche me out."

"What was he even saying to you before the match?" Sam frowned. "You know, when you two were just standing there in the middle of the mats for like, five minutes?"

"He was telling me that he was going to win, and make you go running back to him," Freddie told her.

"What?" Sam exclaimed. "That's crazy! How stupid can he-"

"Well hello, Samantha," Jonah said, walking over to the couple. "Long time no see. Impressed by what you saw out there?"

"By you? Not a chance," Sam snapped.

"Well either way," Jonah shrugged. "I just beat the snot out of your boyfriend, didn't I? Why don't you dump the loser and come back to a winner?"

"Hey, you're the loser here, dipthong!" Sam said harshly. "Freddie's more of a winner than you'll ever be."

Freddie smiled as Sam defended him. True, as his girlfriend, Sam wasn't exactly _as_ violent towards him as she had been in their previous years, but that didn't mean that she went handing out compliments to him on a daily basis, so this was a rather refreshing change of events.

"Whatever," Jonah sneered. "I can get hotter chicks. Didn't you just see me out there? I'm a star!"

"Well too bad for you, Jonah," Freddie said, stepping towards him. "Because _my girlfriend _is the hottest girl around here."

"And you're not a star, you stubrag," Sam told him, blushing slightly as Freddie's last comment. "You got through the _first round _of the competition. I'd bet a years worth of ham you go home after the second round. No girl's going to be impressed by that. Especially once you lift up your mask and she sees that thing you call a face. Now get out of here before I reintroduce you to your good friend the wedgie bounce!"

The mention of the wedgie bounce seemed to strike fear into Jonah, and with one last glare at Sam and Freddie, he hurried away.

"Wow," Freddie said, putting an arm around Sam. "Look at you sticking up for me. Who would've ever thought that would happen?"

"Yeah, well, he's a jerk," Sam shrugged. She looked up at her boyfriend. "Um, you really think I'm the hottest girl around here?"

"You're the hottest girl _anywhere_, Sam," Freddie chuckled, leaning down to kiss her.


	179. Chapter 179

_Station_

"Wow," Carly grinned as Freddie walked into her apartment wearing a tie and jacket. "Doesn't somebody look all fancy for his date?"

"Thank you," Freddie smiled. "Is Sam ready yet?"

"Yeah, I am," Sam said, coming down stairs, wearing a blue skirt and white blouse.

"Looking hot, as usual," Freddie said, staring at his girlfriend.

"Staring, as usual, are we?" Sam asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I wish I could stare even longer," Freddie said. "But our reservations at Petrozini's are in twenty minutes, so we'd better get going."

"Yeah, about that," Sam said. "I canceled our reservations."

"What? Why?" Freddie exclaimed. "Do you know how hard it was to make those reservations?"

"Really? I never have problem getting reservations there," Carly said.

"Well yeah, because you flirt with all the busboys!" Freddie pointed out. He turned back to Sam. "Sam, I thought we were going to go out tonight?"

"We are," Sam said, grabbing her jacket.

"Well then why did you-"

"Look," Sam said. "You're always the one planning dates for me, so I thought tonight, I could take _you _out on a date."

"Isn't that sweet?" Carly asked proudly. "She thought of that all on her own!"

"You're going to take me out?" Freddie asked, amused. "Wow, Sam, that sounds-I mean, that was so-Wow."

"Good," Sam said. "So stop your stammering and let's get moving."

"Where are we going?" Freddie asked her.

"Well that's a surprise, Benson," Sam smiled. "Now come on!"

She grabbed Freddie's hand and led him out of the apartment.

"Are we gonna walk to wherever this mysterious destination is?" Freddie asked as the couple headed out into the fresh air of Seattle.

"Nah, it's too far," Sam said. "We're gonna take the bus."

"I _could _drive us there, you know," Freddie said. "My mom's out of town and she forgot to take the keys to her van with her."

"Nope," Sam said firmly. "My date, my rules. We take the bus. Besides, we can't make out on the way to where I'm taking you if you're driving, now can we?"

"Hmm, the bus it is," Freddie laughed.

They got to the bus stop just as the bus was pulling up.

"Hey, Sam!" the bus driver greeted her as her and Freddie stepped on.

"Hey, Joe," Sam said to him. "This is Freddie, my boyfriend."

"Oh come on, Sam," Joe laughed, looking at Freddie. "You can do better than that kid!"

"Yeah, I know," Sam said, patting Freddie's back. "But he's cool...sort of. Anyway, we're gonna get off on the last stop of your route, is that okay?"

"Yup, sit back and relax," Joe nodded.

"So," Freddie said as the couple headed to the back of the bus. "I take it you know that guy?"

"Oh yeah, I've known Joe my whole life," Sam said. "Literally. He was driving this bus when my mom gave birth to me here. See, right there." She pointed to a slightly discolored portion of the floor which Freddie made it a point to step over. "So I always get to ride this bus for free, plus any friends I bring on."

"I guess your mom's terrible planning has its perks then," Freddie said. "It got you free transportation, at least. Now...I believe I was promised some kissing..."

Nearly twenty minutes and one make-out session later, the bus came to a stop.

"Here we are," Sam said as they exited the bus.

"Where _are _we?" Freddie frowned, looking around.

"Oh just come on," Sam said, grabbing his hand. "Oh, and close your eyes! Like I said, this is a surprise."

"Okay," Freddie obliged, closing his hands and blindly letting Sam lead him. "Just don't-ow!"

"Sorry," Sam chuckled. She had led Freddie into lamppost. "Couldn't resist..."

Sam led him for a few minutes before finally coming to a stop.

"Alright," she said. "You can look now."

Freddie opened his eyes and saw that they were standing in front of a large brick structure. He gasped. "Sam! You did not! Is this really-?"

"The Seattle train station," Sam nodded. "Yeah, it is."

"But-But you hate trains when they're not involved in high speed chases!" Freddie sputtered.

"Yeah, and _you_ hate watching sumo wrestlers fight over giant hams," Sam said. "But you took me to see that last week, didn't you? So, well, this is my way of saying thanks. Let's go in, though, or we're going to miss our train."

"Wait, you got us tickets?" Freddie frowned.

"Uh-huh," Sam nodded, pulling two tickets out of her purse. "On one of those old trains with the rivets and everything..."

"Those are my favorite!" Freddie said, wrapping his arms around his girlfriend.

"Yeah, I know," Sam smiled. "Anyway, it's not really taking us anywhere. It's one of those dinner trains that circles around the city a few times."

"Okay, this is _way _better than Petrozini's," Freddie said as him and Sam headed into the train station.

"No chiz," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

When they boarded the train, they saw that their car was relatively empty.

"Most people aren't as big of trains as you are," Sam told him as they took their seats. "So at least we won't be surrounded by people tonight."

"Good," Freddie said, taking her hand in his. "I'm glad it will just be the two of us. Baby...I-I can't believe you did all this."

"Well you do stuff like this all the time for me," Sam mumbled, looking down.

"I know, and I love doing it for you," Freddie told her. "But none of my friends with girlfriends have ever had their girlfriend do something like this for them."

"How many of your lame friends actually have girlfriends?" Sam scoffed.

"Well, only a few guys from the AV club," Freddie admitted.

"You know, I've got to say," Sam smiled as their waiter set down a basket of biscuits on their table and the train began to move. "I'm actually not as miserable as I thought I'd be on a train."

"Could it have anything to do with the company?" Freddie laughed.

"Mmm, maybe," Sam said, grabbing a biscuit. "So, you really like all this?"

"I do," Freddie said earnestly. "But you know, Sam, as much as I appreciate you doing all this for me, you don't have to. I'd be more than happy just spending the evening with you at the Groovy Smoothie or my place or at Carly's. Really, as long as you're there, Sam, I'm good."

"What cheesy 1950's movie did you get _that _line from?" Sam asked.

"Ha, ha," Freddie smiled. He took a sip of his water. "Anyway, since we're on this historical train, want me to give you some neat trivia facts? This train was originally used to transport cargo from several cities in California and Oregon, and began being used as a passenger train in 1962. It also runs on-"

"What did I do?" Sam moaned as useless trivia continued to come out of Freddie's mouth. "What did I do?"


	180. Chapter 180

**AN-This is a follow-up to a oneshot that was published awhile ago. It was chapter 140, where Sam and Freddie went down to the Groovy Smoothie during iCan't Take It and one of the cashiers hit on Sam and got Freddie jealous. Also, this oneshot takes place after iBalls, when everyone left Carly after she got off the elevator.**

**...**

_Thinking_

"Should we have invited Carly to come with us?" Sam asked as her, Spencer and Freddie headed downstairs to the Groovy Smoothie.

"Nah, she'll just tell us stories about our granddad," Spencer said. "Just let her rest upstairs and take a bath or something and she'll be fine."

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "Besides, after a long plane ride with a bunch of loud obnoxious people, she probably wants some time alone."

"Right," Spencer agreed. "And we're three of the most obnoxious people she knows!"

"That's true," Sam shrugged. "Aw, crab, I forgot my wallet up there."

"Eh, no worries, I'll get your smoothie," Freddie told her.

"Um, okay," Sam said. "Thanks."

Freddie smiled. Truthfully, he was _glad _Carly wasn't coming with them. Not because he was mad at her or anything, she was one of his closest friends, after all, but these past couple of days with her in Yakima, him and Sam seemed to really connect. Sam had shown him more of that sensitive, caring side of hers that he rarely got to see. She had _actually _tried to comfort him after the disastrous Fredbot incident (which he was still trying to block out of his mind), and had _encouraged _and _supported _his 3D idea, instead of shooting it down. It was rare Sam behavior.

In fact, the only time Freddie could remember Sam acting like this was back when they were dating...Man, he had been shocked to see that side of Sam. He had of course known that Sam wasn't the tough girl she acted out all the time, but seeing her other side for the first time a few days after they started going out...it was amazing.

True, he'd never get tired of the Sam who enjoyed terrorizing teachers with her butter sock or who could eat an entire ham in under ten minutes, but it was nice knowing that within that aggressive, abrasive girl laid a softer, gentler one who revealed herself to only a select few.

Freddie was still in his own little world when they arrived at the Groovy Smoothie.

"Hey, what are you guys getting?" T-Bo asked as they approached the counter.

"Um, I'll have a Mango Melon Swirl," Freddie said, snapping back to reality. "Sam, what are you getting?"

"I'll have a Kiwi Blast," Sam replied.

"Aw, does this mean what I think it means?" T-Bo grinned as Freddie pulled out his wallet to pay for both the smoothies. "Are you two back together?"

"Huh? Oh, no," Freddie said quickly, handing T-Bo the money.

"Yeah, no, I-I just forgot my wallet," Sam nodded.

"Well dang it then!" T-Bo frowned, grabbing the bills from Freddie. "Who the heck am I supposed to sell Love Smoothies to then? I still have eight dozen of those cups!"

He slammed the money in the cash register and stormed off.

"Where are you going?" Freddie called after him as T-Bo headed to the back room.

"To go try and sell those cups online!" T-Bo snapped. "Since you two teens are trying to put me out of business!"

"Wait, T-Bo!" Spencer exclaimed. "You forgot to take my-and he's gone. Great. Now I don't get a smoothie!"

"Come on, let's just go find a table," Sam said.

"Fine," Spencer huffed.

The three sat down at one of the only open tables.

"Man, this place is pretty packed," Freddie observed. "I bet-" But then he stopped. He was staring behind the counter where stood that jerky cashier that he had dumped a smoothie on for hitting on Sam, back when they were dating. He clenched his fists as he remembered the event. There was something different about this guy, though. It looked as if his face had cleared up, and his hair was less greasy. In other words, he had handsomed up. Freddie just hoped that he would stay clear of Sam.

"Alright, I'm going to pee," Spencer said, getting to his feet.

"We don't care," Sam told him.

"Marty would've," Spencer mumbled as he dragged his feet off to the bathrooms.

"There _had _to have been something wrong with that Marty dude," Sam said, shaking her head.

"Huh? Oh yeah, probably," Freddie said quickly, still watching the hated cashier out of the corner of his eye. He was coming over now, carrying a tray of smoothies towards their table.

"Here you go, one Mango Melon Swirl and one Kiwi Blast," he said, setting the beverages down. "Oh...it's you two."

He had apparently recognized them. Sam looked up. "Oh yeah, you're that jerk from like, four months ago!"

"Yeah, the jerk," Freddie nodded, narrowing his eyes.

"Um, look, I-I've been feeling really bad about that," the boy said, speaking only to Sam.

"Yeah, I'll bet you have," Sam scoffed, grabbing her smoothie.

"I have," the boy said, sitting down in Spencer's seat.

"Hey, that seat's taken!" Freddie said, but the boy ignored him.

"Anyway, I just wanted to apologize to you for hitting on you like that," he continued.

"Um, what about me?" Freddie frowned.

"It was really rude to do," the boy went on, once again, pretending not to hear Freddie. "And I'm sorry. But you know how it is, you see someone you think is attractive and you kind of go all bonkers and don't really think things through."

"Oh, please," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "What a load of-"

"I'm Ben, by the way," the boy said, extending a hand to Sam. "And I already know you're name's Sam. I'm a big fan of that web show of yours."

"Really? You like iCarly?" Sam asked.

"Of course, you're hilarious!" Ben nodded. "You're my favorite on the show. That Carly girl, she's funny and all, but you're the real reason I keep watching. Plus, between you and me, you're the better looking one, too."

Sam rose an eyebrow. Did he really just say that she was better looking than Carly Shay? No guy had ever said that about her. In all her years of friendship with Carly no boy had ever favored her over her best friend. Jonah, her first boyfriend, was attracted to her before too long, and Shane, who she knew never officially picked Carly during that stupid bet of theres, but she knew he was _very _close to doing so, before he fell down that elevator shaft.

And then there was Freddie.

For years she had watched him drool over Carly like she was some sort of Goddess. At first, when they were younger, it was just annoying, but as they got older, that annoyance turned into something else. Especially after they shared that first kiss on the fire escape. And after Freddie had saved Carly from that taco truck two years ago, and the two dated for that horribly long week, she felt as though her two friends had unknowingly stabbed her, and she was ecstatic when their relationship crumpled.

When her and Freddie had been dating a few months ago, she was overjoyed, though she did her best to try and keep that between her and herself (she _was_ Sam Puckett, after all, she couldn't go jumping up and down because she had a boyfriend, she had an image to uphold!). But after they broke up, one terrible, wicked thought kept circling through her head.

_Was it because I wasn't as 'normal' as Carly?_ Had her best friend yet again unknowingly overshadowed her? She liked to think that Freddie had gotten over that crush he had on Carly, but sometimes, she just didn't know.

And here was this new guy, a guy who she knew had been a complete jerk to her _and _Freddie. But he had just said the words she had been craving to hear for years now.

"You-You really think so?" she stuttered.

"Definitely," Ben grinned.

Freddie, who had been watching this scene silently, gripped his smoothie cup tightly in anger. Too tightly, though, for his cup suddenly burst and his smoothie spilled out onto the table and onto Sam's shirt.

"Hey! What are you doing to that cup, Benson?" Sam asked, jumping up.

"I-I don't-sorry-" Freddie said.

"Hey, all the employees here get stains on there clothes," Ben told her. "We have a bunch of club soda that gets stains out in the back. You want some?"

"Yeah, sure," Sam nodded.

"Come on, then," Ben told her. "And, well, maybe afterwards, you and I can head across the street and get some ice cream. My treat."

Sam stared at him. Did he just ask her out on a date? She knew there was no chance of any serious relationship brewing between her and him, and quite frankly, she didn't find him too attractive, even with his approved appearance from the last time she saw him. But what he had said about her being better than Carly, that stuck with her. Maybe it wouldn't hurt to get ice cream with him. After all, she wanted just one night where she could relish in the feeling that someone had picked _her _over Carly.

"Um, yeah," Sam nodded. "Sounds cool."

Freddie felt his stomach clench as Ben led Sam to the back of the Groovy Smoothie to get the club soda for her shirt. Were they going out on a date? Did Ben really just ask her out? And more importantly, did Sam really just say yes? How? How could she be going _anywhere _with that jerk? What did she suddenly find so attractive about him?

"Hey, where's Sam?" Spencer asked, taking his seat that Ben had just vacated.

"In the back," Freddie mumbled moodily. "Apparently she's in love with one of the cashiers now."

"Um, how long was I in the bathroom?" Spencer frowned.

"Long enough for her to agree to go out on a date with the guy," Freddie sighed.

"Oh, man, that's rough," Spencer said. "Are-Are you okay?"

Freddie looked up at the man. Spencer had always been a sort of older-brother figure to him. He had helped him with all of the problems that he couldn't go to his mom with and Freddie had always seen him as, in certain aspects, a role model. There was no point in lying to him.

"No," he said softly.

"Is-Is it because you still have feelings for her?" Spencer asked gently.

"I don't know," Freddie sighed. "I-maybe. Or no, not maybe. I-I do."

"Yeah, I figured."

"You-"

"Oh come on, you two practically live at my place," Spencer said. "I can sense I teen romance when I see one."

"Well, what am I supposed to do?" Freddie asked. "If she's willing to go out and get ice cream with that cashier guy, then clearly she doesn't feel the same way about me, does she?"

"Well, maybe she does," Spencer said. "But she's just, I don't know, confused. Apparently girls have a _lot _of emotions. I was reading this article in _Modern Woman_-"

"You read _Modern Woman_?" Freddie frowned.

"Do you want my help or not?"

"Yes, yes, sorry," Freddie said quickly.

"As I was saying, I was reading the article, and it said that a lot of times, girls are afraid to admit they have feelings for an ex again, so they just turn to the nearest possible alternative. In Sam's case, the cashier."

"Hmm, I _guess_, that makes sense. Sort of," Freddie nodded. "So you don't think Sam really likes this cashier guy?"

"Dude, you've known Sam for years," Spencer said. "Do you really think she'd just go out with a guy she barely knows because she really likes him? Or because she's trying to avoid something?"

Freddie felt hopeful at this information. "So-So I can still have a chance then? How?"

"Yeah...the article didn't really cover that," Spencer said. "But maybe you could try and, I dunno, make her jealous? That always works in the movies."

"Jealous?" Freddie repeated.

"Yeah, or try fixing the little things that bothered her when you guys were going out," Spencer said. "Hey! T-Bo's back! Yo, Teebs! I want my smoothie!"

Freddie put his head on his hand, thinking hard about what Spencer just told him as the man ran at full-speed towards the counter.

How could he make Sam jealous? Well, that actually seemed pretty easy. Maybe he could make her think that he had a crush on Carly again. It would be hard to make her think that, he supposed, since he had thought of Carly as a sister for the longest time now, but he figured her could make it work. Maybe if Sam got jealous enough, it would cause her to try and get him back, at which point, he would happily oblige.

And fixing what bothered her when they were going out before...well, didn't Sam say she wanted him to be more abnormal? That couldn't be too hard, could it? He just had to act more like her, loud, rude...maybe insult her now and then.

Yes...yes, this could work! Freddie couldn't wait to start putting this all in action. He knew it might be a bit extreme, but hey, if that what it took to get Sam Puckett back...

...

**AN-So this is sort of my interpretation of why Freddie's been acting sort of jerky towards Sam lately, or at least in iOpen a Restaurant and iPear Store. Because before and during iBalls, the couple seemed to be almost civil to each other. But then after..**


	181. Chapter 181

**AN-Sorry for all of you who read iStart my Life. I didn't have as many chapters for that story saved away as I did for this one. I actually considered waiting and just updating both of them at the same time, but then I figured that would be unfair to those of you who just read this. **

**Also, like I've been saying, I will write any request that you guys send me, but I also like to try and keep everything as PG-PG13 as possible. So sometimes, I may just sort of tweak them, like I did with this one, to try and keep them within that rating. **

**...**

_Commitment_

"Hey, Freddie," Carly smiled, letting herself into the apartment at her best friends lived in. "Where's Sam?"

"Upstairs," Freddie replied, not looking up from the catalogue he was looking at. He had a pad of paper next to him and every now and then he would jot something down.

"Oh, well, her and I were supposed to go to Build-A-Bra today," Carly said, sitting down next to Freddie.

"Yeah, I know," Freddie nodded, flipping a page in his catalogue. "She's getting dressed now; she just woke up a few minutes ago."

"It's almost three in the afternoon," Carly pointed out.

"It's Sam," Freddie said simply.

"Very true," Carly laughed. "So, what'cha reading there?"

"Oh, um, nothing," Freddie said quickly.

"It doesn't look like nothing," Carly frowned. "Why can't I see it?"

"Because, um," Freddie stammered. "You-Hey!" Carly had grabbed the catalogue out of his hands.

"Oh my God!" Carly exclaimed. "Why are you looking at the Build-A-Bra catalogue?"

"It's not-"

"You are _married _to my best friend," Carly said angrily. "How can you just sit here and drool over chippy little models?"

"I'm not drooling over the models, Carly!" Freddie said, trying to grab the catalogue back.

"Right," Carly snapped. "I'm sure that you, a guy, would just be looking at this to see the wide variety of bras!"

"That's-"

"Hey, Carls," Sam said, walking into the room. "Are we ready to go?"

"Sam, you'll never guess what I caught, Freddie, the man you made a commitment to spend the rest of your life with, looking at!" Carly said, holding up the Build-A-Bra catalogue.

"Oh for the love of ham, aren't you done with that," Sam sighed. "You've been going through it all morning."

"Well I just got interrupted," Freddie said, grabbing the catalogue back from Sam.

"Well hurry it up!"

"Wait, wait, wait," Carly said, confused. "You knew he was going through the catalogue?"

"Yeah," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I lost a bet with him..."

"So...he gets to stare at the models in there?" Carly frowned.

"No, I told you, I'm not looking at the models!" Freddie said.

"See, last night I bet him that I could shove more marshmallows into my mouth in a minute than he could," Sam explained. "And the winner got to make the loser do one thing for them. Whatever they wanted."

"And I won," Freddie said proudly.

"Only because I sneezed," Sam said. "So Fredguts gave me a choice. He said I either had to go to that new train restaurant, you know, the lame one where all the tables look like trains and there's rail tracks all over the floor?"

"It's a class place!" Freddie defended.

"What was your other choice then?" Carly asked.

"I had to let him pick out the bra I got from Build-A-Bra today," Sam said.

"Hence the catalogue," Freddie said.

"Wow," Carly laughed. "You guys are an...interesting couple. Well, at least this doesn't sound as bad as the train restaurant."

"Yeah, I know," Sam nodded. "But the nub's been extra-annoying all morning. He's been going through all my bras, looking at the sizes and all that chiz."

"Got to make sure I don't have you get one you already have," Freddie said, adding one last think to his note pad. "And I think I've got it. Here you go."

Sam grabbed the note pad and looked at it. "Oh, you've _got _to be kidding me! There's no way-"

"We had a deal, Sam," Freddie said, smiling. "If you don't want to get it, I can call and make reservations at Chug-a Chug-a Chew Chew right now and-"

"Fine," Sam snapped.

"Wow," Carly chuckled, looking at the note pad. "You must _really _hate trains, Sam."

...

"No, Gibby, I'm telling, you, it's not normal to have hair _between _your toes," Freddie said, sitting on the couch later that afternoon, talking on his pearphone. "On them, sure, I guess, but not between. You should really see someone about that. Oh, and ask about that thing on your back too..."

Just then he heard the front door of the apartment swing open.

"I've got to go, Gib," Freddie said quickly. He hung up the phone just as Sam walked into the living room. "Hey, baby. Did you get it?"

"Yes," Sam huffed, tossing the bag at him. "I cannot believe you made me get that! Do you know how many weird looks I got at Build-A-Bra?"

"They were probably just jealous" Freddie asked, opening the bag. "I mean, who wouldn't want a _Galaxy Wars _bra? With Nug Nug straps and proton cruisers everywhere? It's every girls dream!"

"Yeah, keep thinking that," Sam said, shaking her head.

"Well, fine it's not _every _girls dream," Freddie admitted. "But still...I can't wait to see you wearing this."

"I'll bet," Sam grinned. "But guess what? You never will."

"What? Sam!" Freddie exclaimed. "We had a deal and-"

"Yeah, the deal was you get to pick a bra for me to make at Build-A-Bra," Sam said. "There was nothing in that deal about me ever wearing it."

"I-But-You-" Freddie stammered.

"Congratulations on your win, baby," Sam smiled, kissing his quickly. "I'm going to go deep fry some spaghetti."

"No, wait, Sam!" Freddie exclaimed as Sam headed into the kitchen. "You can't do this to me!"

But Sam ignored her, smiling triumphantly.

"Man," Freddie moaned. He smacked his forehead. "Always think of the loopholes, Benson! You've always got to think of the loopholes!"


	182. Chapter 182

**AN- Again, trying to keep everything at least PG-13 here, so this one, again, I just tweaked so that Sam and Freddie are just making out in this. Everything else from the request is the same, though. **

_Portability_

"Dude, it's a purse," Sam said.

"No, it's not!" Spencer defended, clutching his purse-like bag tightly. "It's a man bag!"

"Looks pretty pursey to me," Carly smiled.

"It's not a purse!" Spencer exclaimed.

"Spence, just get rid of it," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "You look ridiculous with it. Well, more ridiculous."

"But it's so practical!" Spencer said. "I can put my wallet in it, plus my phone, some snacks, my glue gun, extra socks, some chile powder...I mean, why should only girls be limited to this type of portability?"

"Fine, keep your man purse," Carly said, shaking her head in amusement. "I just hope I don't confuse it with any of my purses."

"It's not a-!"

"Yeah, yeah, we get it," Sam cut him off. "Aren't you supposed to be picking us up a pizza? I'm starving."

"Oh, right," Spencer said. "And if I get hungry on the way home...look what I have in my man bag! Parmesan cheese and red pepper flakes!"

"It's really concerning that he's in charge of me sometimes," Carly sighed as her older brother headed out the door. "Okay, well, I've got to go too. I promised Gibby I'd meet him at the library to work on our Spanish project."

"I thought Gibby was afraid of libraries?" Freddie pointed out.

"His therapist has been working with him," Carly explained, grabbing her jacket. "So as long as no mailmen show up there, we're good. Sam, have you started your project with Wendy?"

Sam gave a laugh in response.

"Yeah...I should've figured," Carly said. "Well, see you guys later. And try to keep your lips to yourself for at least a few minutes, will you? I was reading this one article online, and apparently, if you kiss too much, your lips start to get all chapped and gross."

"Eh, if I can stand dating Fredlumps with the face he has know, I doubt chapped lips will bother me," Sam shrugged.

"Um, thanks, I guess?" Freddie frowned.

"Fine, if you want to be all dry lipped, go ahead, make out," Carly said. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have a Gibby to go and deal with."

The second the door closed behind Carly, Sam and Freddie's lips were pressed against each other passionately.

"I can't believe we lasted five months without doing this," Freddie said breathlessly, wrapping his arms around Sam's waist.

"What a waste of five months, huh?" Sam grinned, continuing to kiss her boyfriend.

"Definitely," Freddie agreed.

The two continued to make out, their kisses deepening as the moments passed. They were both so engrossed in their activity, though, that they didn't hear the apartment door opening.

"Hey, who's hungry?" Spencer said, turning on the lights that Sam and Freddie had dimmed. "It's pepperoni and-Ah! What-You-Ah!"

Sam and Freddie broke apart and turned towards Spencer who, in the shock, had dropped the pizza on the ground, although he didn't seem to notice this.

"Um, h-hey there, Spence," Sam said, her cheeks blushing red.

"Yeah, hey," Freddie said sheepishly. "Y-You know, now that I think of it, that man bag actually looks pretty good on-"

"Shut it!" Spencer said loudly. "I-I don't understand. You two were broken up! Broken up couples don't do...what I just saw!"

"I thought Carly would've told you we got back together a few weeks ago," Sam told him. "We thought you knew!"

"Carly said no such thing!"

"Oh...well then," Freddie said awkwardly. "How about some pizza then? I mean, sure it has floor on it, but hey, I won't complain."

"Huh? Oh," Spencer said, looking down and just realizing that the pizza had fallen. "Um, Sam...if you could, you know, untangle yourself from Mr. Benson, could you run back across the street and pick up another pizza with no floor on it?"

"It doesn't have too much floor on it," Sam said. "It barely came out of the box and-"

"Go get more pizza or I'm discontinuing my subscription to the pie of the week club!"

"Fine...no need to threaten me with pie," Sam mumbled.

"Um, look, Spence," Freddie said as Sam left the apartment. "I get that was sort of...awkward. We'll try not to let it happen again-"

"What are you doing?" Spencer asked, crossing his arms.

"What do you mean?" Freddie frowned.

"I mean, _what are you doing_," Spencer repeated. "With Sam."

"Um...dating her?"

"Yeah, I figured that out from the disgusting smooching," Spencer said. "But I mean...you're not going to do what you did last time, are you?"

"What did I do last time?"

"Hmm, let me think about that," Spencer said. "You broke up with her!"

"But it was mutual!" Freddie said. "She broke up with me just as much as I broke up with her!"

"Well, you're not the one who cried on my couch for the first few days after it happened," Spencer said. "So in my book, you dumped her."

"She-She cried?" Freddie frowned. "But she's Sam!"

"Yeah, well, you apparently got to her enough to make her do it," Spencer said. "It was a few days after I think, and her mom was at some seminar on waxing in Portland, so she was sleeping over here. I mean, obviously she acted like she didn't care, but I woke up one night at around three because I had another giant cereal bowl dream, and she was sitting out here sort of crying to herself while she watched the Gator Channel."

"I-I didn't know," Freddie said softly.

"I know," Spencer said. "Which is why you'd better not be getting back together again just because your lips have been itching! Because if I find out you made her upset like that again, I'm going to...well, I can't beat you up on my own, but I'll hire Socko's cousin Armen to do it for me!"

"Spencer!"

"Okay, so I wouldn't _actually _hire some guy to beat you up," Spencer admitted. "But I _would _be very, very mad at you! So if you only got back together with Sam so you'd have something to do with all your teenage hormones running through your body, then you'd better just end things right now before they get serious again!"

"Spencer, I as stupid enough to let Sam go once," Freddie told him. "Do you really think I would do it twice?"

"You mean that?" Spencer asked.

"I do."

"Well...good then," Spencer said. "Now that's out of the way...Dude! I can't believe you two are back together again! That's so adorable; I've got to tell Donna from my book club, she'll be so happy! But, um...if you can just make sure I never see you two...you know, again, that'd be great."


	183. Chapter 183

_Capital_

"Carly, cool it with the wedding stuff, will you?" Sam moaned, walking into Spencer's apartment.

"Just one last thing," Carly begged. "Please? I'm the maid of honor, I need to make sure everything's perfect!"

"Fine, what?" Sam asked.

"Do you want the place cards at the reception to be in all capitals?" Carly asked. "Or do you think that's not classy enough?"

"You make the call on this one, Carls," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Hmm...it's such a tough decision," Carly said thoughtfully as Sam opened the fridge and grabbed a pudding cup. "You know what? We'll go for the all capitals!"

"Great," Sam said.

"Hey, was that the last pudding cup?" Spencer asked, running out of his bedroom wearing a pink bathrobe.

"Um, no there are like, eight in there still," Sam said, smirking at his attire. "Manly bathrobe."

"It's soft and fluffy!"

"Hey, isn't that _my _old robe?" Carly frowned.

"No..." Spencer mumbled.

"Yeah, just burn it when you're done with it," Carly said. "Anyway, come on, Sam, we need to get to the wedding dress place."

"No!" Sam moaned. "I just spent the last three hours looking at flowers with you! Why doesn't Freddie have to do any of this stuff? It's _his _wedding too, you know."

"Please," Carly scoffed. "It's not your's and Freddie's wedding. It's _your _wedding."

"Are you sure it's not _your _wedding?" Sam asked.

"Ha ha," Carly said. "Look, all Freddie has to do is show up there, say a few words, kiss you and then he's done!"

"Don't you just feel so lucky for her future husband?" Sam asked Spencer.

"Poor guy," Spencer said. "And I thought you already picked out your wedding dress."

"She did," Carly explained. "But she has to get it altered today so it fits her perfectly for the wedding. It shouldn't take more than a few hours, Sam."

"How about you call up Melanie and go with her?" Sam asked. "We're identical, have her wear the dress and have the lady alter it on her."

"Well...I guess that will work," Carly said. "Are you sure? I mean, this is your wedding dress altercation day!"

"I think I can live," Sam said.

"Okay, I'll call Melanie downstairs then," Carly said. "But remember, we're going cake testing tomorrow!"

"I'll be there for that, trust me," Sam said.

"Wow," Spencer said as Carly closed the apartment door behind her. "She's really getting into the whole planning thing, huh?"

"Yup," Sam sighed.

"Eh, she lives for this stuff," Spencer said. "Oh, and I got my tux today from Socko's brother, and if I do say so myself, I look pretty stunning in it."

"Just don't wear it everywhere again," Sam grinned.

"I'll try," Spencer laughed, pouring himself a glass of chocolate milk. "You want any of this? It's extra chocolately."

"Um, sure," Sam nodded. "Uh, Spencer? Can I talk to you about something?"

"Is it about the box under my bed?"

"No?"

"Then yes."

"You know how in weddings," Sam began. "When the girl's walking down the aisle and all, she's usually with her dad, who gives her away to her new husband?"

"Yeah."

"Well, considering the fact that I haven't seen my dad since I was six, I'm _thinking_ there's no chance of him and I doing that," Sam said. "And I was thinking about what I was going to do about this the other day, and then I thought...well, um, Spencer, see, I-I was kind of wondering if-if you would mind doing it? Walking me down the aisle at the wedding?"

Spencer swallowed his chocolate milk. "You want _me_ to give you away?"

"You don't have to," Sam told him. "It's not a big deal if you don't. I could always just walk down the aisle on my own, or maybe my mom could do it or something, but I was just thinking that if you wanted to-"

"Sam," Spencer said seriously. "Of course I want to. Do you have any idea how honored I would be to do i?."

"So-So you want to then?" Sam asked.

"Duh!" Spencer nodded.

"I-wow, um, thanks, Spencer," Sam said, smiling at him.

"Don't mention it," Spencer told her giving her a hug.

...

"Oh man, I'm freaking out," Sam said as she nervously waited outside the church doors, getting ready to make her entrance at her wedding.

"Relax, it's going to be fine," Spencer told her.

"I'm gonna puke," Sam said. "I know it. Dang, why did I eat those chile dogs this morning?"

"Hey, come on, this is your wedding!" Spencer told her. "You're about to make Freddie the happiest guy on the planet."

"I wish this would just hurry up, though," Sam moaned.

"I think we're almost up," Spencer said, peaking his head into the church. "Yeah! Hey, this is it!"

He held out his arm for her.

"This is it," Sam said softly.

"You'll do great," Spencer smiled at her.

The two slowly walked into the church, all eyes on Sam in her white wedding dress. But Spencer was looking right at Freddie, whose face was so full of amazement as he watched his soon-to-be bride walk down the aisle. Spencer glanced over at Sam.

It seemed as if she had left all of her anxiety outside the church, for she was wearing the biggest smile that Spencer had ever seen.

When they finally reached the altar, Spencer gave Sam a kiss on the cheek as she stepped up next to Freddie. As Spencer passed Freddie to take his place, he brushed up against him to whisper in his ear, "Take care of her."


	184. Chapter 184

_Drafting_

"Are you sure you don't want some rutabagas?" T-Bo asked, handing Sam her smoothie.

"Yes," Sam said, grabbing her smoothie as she cringed at the stick of fleshy yellow vegetables on a stick in T-Bo's hand. "No one's going to buy your gross roots."

"Well Mrs. Benson threw out the enchiladas I was going to try and sell," T-Bo said. "And this is all she had in her fridge! Man, that woman hates me. Do you have any idea what that's like?"

"Um, I'm dating her precious little Freddikins," Sam reminded him. "I'm sure she hates me ten times more than she hates you."

"Hey, yeah, you're right!" T-Bo said, brightening up. "Thanks!"

"Anytime," Sam said. "See you around, Teebs."

Sipping her smoothie, Sam headed back to Bushwell Plaza.

"No drinks in my lobby!" Lewbert shrieked when she entered the apartment building.

"Don't tell me what to do, Warty," Sam snapped.

"Ah! You all irritate me!" Lewbert yelled. "This is why I tell mother I want to quit this dead-end job and re-start my modeling career, but _nooo, _mother want's a _doorman _in the family!"

He flung down the tuna sandwich he had been eating and, still screaming, retreated into his office through the door behind the front desk.

Sam shook her head in disgust. She was just about to head up the stairs to Carly's apartment when she noticed that Lewbert's laptop was still at the desk. Well...it couldn't hurt to go through the guy's email and see what sort of weird things flooded his inbox, now could it?

She hurried behind the desk and pulled up his email, but before she got a chance to see what exactly was there, she heard voices coming down.

"Come on, let's go to the Groovy Smoothie," she heard a boys voice saying. She frowned. That wasn't just a boys voice. That was Freddie's voice!

"Do they sell smoothies there?" she heard another, higher, voice ask. A girls voice! And it wasn't Carly's voice, or any other girl's voice she recognized from school...who was he with?

Curiosity getting the best of her, Sam ducked down behind the desk just as Freddie and the mysterious girl entered the lobby. Sam peaked out from around the desk and saw that the girl Freddie was with was tall and blonde and very pretty.

"Um, yeah, Nadine," Freddie said. "They sell smoothies at the Groovy Smoothie."

"Awesome!" the girl, Nadine, answered happily.

Who was this girl, Sam wondered. And what was she doing hanging around _her _Freddie?

Thoughts of Lewbert's email forgotten, Sam grabbed her bag and hurried after them, making sure she kept them in sight, but kept enough distance so that they wouldn't see her.

They walked into the Groovy Smoothie. Sam peaked through the glass of the door. The two of them were sitting at the table him and Sam usually sat at during their dates, and they were talking...and laughing!

_Okay_, Sam told herself. _That-That could mean anything...They could just be friends...a friend that me and Carly don't know, sure, but maybe she's from the AV club or something..._

But then T-Bo placed a large love smoothie on the table with two straws in it and Sam felt her knees buckles.

_Friends don't share love smoothies,_ she thought miserably to herself. Tearing herself away from the door, Sam hurried back to Bushwell Plaza and ran straight up to Carly's apartment.

"Hey, hey!" Spencer said as she burst into the door. "You want to see the new sculpture I'm working on? I'm in the drafting period right now, but soon it's going to be a purple kangaroo!"

"Let's just hope that _this _kangaroo sculpture doesn't burst into flames, right Sam?" Carly laughed. Then she caught sight of her best friend's face. "Sam? Are you alright?"

"No," Sam mumbled. She grabbed Carly's wrist and pulled her off the couch. "Come here."

She dragged her into the kitchen.

"What's wrong?" Carly frowned.

"Freddie's cheating on me," Sam said.

"What? No way," Carly said. "He would never do something like that!"

"I saw him," Sam said.

"What did you see, exactly?" Carly asked.

"He was at the Groovy Smoothie with this blonde chick," Sam said. "Someone named Nadine...Do you know her?"

"Nadine? No," Carly said. "But Sam, I know Freddie, he loves you. He wouldn't cheat on you. Maybe-Maybe this Nadine girl is just a cousin or something."

"I've seen Freddie's cousins in his family album," Sam said. "None of them looked anything like she did."

"Well then maybe she's just a friend," Carly reasoned.

"Carly," Sam said softly. "At the Groovy Smoothie, they-they were sharing a love smoothie."

Carly's eyes widened. "Freddie was sharing a love smoothie with her?"

"What?" Spencer exclaimed, looking up from his kangaroo sculpture. "Who'd Freddie share a love smoothie with?"

"Some chick named Nadine," Sam mumbled. Carly looked at her and saw that she had tears in the corners of her eyes.

"Oh, Sam," Carly said, pulling her friend into a hug. "It's okay."

But that just made Sam loose it.

"No it won't," Sam cried. "My boyfriend's cheating on me, Carly!"

Carly didn't know what to do. She had only seen Sam like this after she had worked at Chile My Bowl. She looked over at Spencer.

"Um, Spencer," Carly said. "Maybe it would be good for me and Sam to have some private time."

"Yeah, sure," Spencer nodded. "I'll just...go to Socko's then."

"I'm going to kill Freddie," Carly mumbled as her brother grabbed his jacket.

"Make sure you save a piece for me!" Spencer said, slamming the apartment door shut.

...

About five hours had passed since Sam had come to Carly about Freddie. Carly had tried everything she could think of to try and make Sam feel better. She showed her all her favorite surgery videos on Splashface, she offered to take her to the mall for a shopping spree at the novelty shop Sam loved so much. She even tried ordering Sam a meat supreme pizza, but that didn't work either.

Finally, Carly talked Sam into lying down for a little bit. She was now laying up in Carly's bed and Carly herself was sitting in the living room, flipping through the channels on the T.V. but not really paying them any attention.

"Hey, Carls," Freddie said suddenly, walking into the apartment. "I finally found a new green screen for iCarly. You want me to go set it up in the-ow!" Carly had flung the remote at Freddie.

"What was that for?" Freddie exclaimed, rubbing the spot on his shoulder where the remote hit him.

"You should know what!" Carly said angrily, jumping up. "How could you, Freddie, I thought you were a better guy than that!"

"What are you talking about?" Freddie frowned.

"Sam saw you with your little bimbo today at the Groovy Smoothie," Carly said, crossing her arms. "Sharing that love smoothie."

"You-You mean Nadine?" Freddie asked.

"Are there more of them?" Carly snapped. "Yes, her! I can't believe you, Freddie Benson! How could you do that to Sam? She loves you, and you go and cheat on her?"

"I didn't cheat on her!" Freddie said loudly. "Does she think that I did?"

"Yes," Carly said firmly. "Do you have any idea how upset she was, Freddie? She turned down a meat supreme pizza! Sam eats those things by the dozen! _And, _she was crying!"

"She-She was?" Freddie asked softly.

"I told you, she _loves _you," Carly said. "How do you expect her react?"

"I-I promise you, Carly, I love her too," Freddie said earnestly. "And I wasn't cheating on her. Is she here? I need to talk to her..."

"Yeah, she's here," Carly mumbled. "And...if you weren't cheating of Sam, what were you doing with that girl?"

"Look, I'll explain everything to you _after_ I talk to Sam," Freddie said. "Where is she?"

"She's upstairs in my room," Carly sighed. "I told her to lie down, but I doubt she's sleeping."

"Thanks," Freddie told her.

He headed upstairs to Carly's door and knocked. There was no answer, so he entered anyway. Sam was laying on Carly's bed, staring up at the ceiling.

"Sam," Freddie said gently, letting himself into the room. "Baby-"

"What do _you _want?" Sam snapped. "Shouldn't you be out with that Nadine girl, sharing love smoothies?"

"Sam," Freddie said, sitting down at the end of the bed. "I'm not cheating on you. Not with Nadine or anyone."

"I saw you two," Sam scoffed, sitting up.

"I-I don't think you saw the whole thing," Freddie sighed. "Look, I guess I should've explained this to you earlier."

"Explained what?" Sam asked. "How you clearly aren't happy enough with me, so you have to go out and find-"

"A few weeks ago," Freddie interrupted her. "My mom signed me up for a...sewing class."

"A sewing class?" Sam repeated. "What's that have to do with anything?"

"That girl, Nadine, who you saw today," Freddie told her. "She's in the class too. The teacher gave us this assignment to sew one full outfit by the end of the class in one week, and she put us in partners to do it, and well, I got stuck with Nadine. I didn't tell you about the class because, well, I-I thought you would laugh. I mean, you're already dating a huge nub...Anyway, me and Nadine were working on the finishing touches of our project at the Groovy Smoothie today."

"Well then why did you buy her a love smoothie?" Sam asked.

"I didn't buy it," Freddie said. "Nadine did."

"There were two straws in the cup," Sam frowned. "If she _did _buy it, you must've been sharing it with her."

"No, I wasn't," Freddie said. "See, Nadine has a boyfriend. This really big guy, who's sort of the jealous type. Every time Nadine and I have been working on the project, he's been there. He was running a little late today, so Nadine just went ahead and ordered one of those love smoothies for them to share when he got there."

Sam was silent.

"Sam," Freddie said, scooting closer to her. "You know I love you. And I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the sewing class and made you think I was cheating. But...I never would. Ever."

"You really mean that?" Sam whispered.

"I do," Freddie smiled.

"I-I guess it isn't so lame that you're in a sewing class," Sam mumbled.

"Um, yeah it is," Freddie grinned.

"I know," Sam smiled. "It really is."


	185. Chapter 185

_Progress_

"Sam, where'd you put dental floss?" Freddie called from their bathroom.

"How should I know?" Sam said, laying on her and Freddie's bed, flipping through a magazine. "I don't floss."

"Well fine then," Freddie said, coming out of the bathroom. "I'll just let my teeth be filled with plaque today."

"Your teeth are fine, baby," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "But hey, listen, I need to talk to you about something."

"What?"

"Well...tonight Emma's going on a date," Sam said slowly.

"Oh, is she?" Freddie asked. "Well that's nice."

"Um, what?" Sam frowned. "That's nice? Dude, when Ashton went on her first date a few months ago, you were freaking out."

"Exactly, I got it out of my system," Freddie said. "I mean, I completely over-reacted to Ashton's date, and he turned out to be a cool guy! The kid's great!"

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "And I'm _sure _Ashton loves the fact that you text her boyfriend during their dates to tell him the latest _Galaxy Wars _news."

"Oh, speaking of that, I need to tell him that they've just confirmed the date of the showing of the _Battle of Panthatar_," Freddie said. "There's going to be fifteen seconds of previously unseen footage! Hey, maybe him, me and Ashton could go see it together!"

"Ashton hates _Galaxy Wars_," Sam reminded him.

"Oh, right," Freddie shrugged. "Well, it looks like it will just be me and neil then! But see, Sam, the point it that I've made a lot of progress in overcoming this overprotective dad thing. So tonight, I'll welcome Emma's date with open arms."

"Um, good, keep that thought," Sam said. "But, just so you know...the guy Emma's going out with...he's nothing like Ashton's boyfriend."

"Well, okay, I-I guess they can't be exactly the same," Freddie said. "But I guess-"

"No," Sam said. "He's _nothing _like Neil is."

"What do you mean? Have you seen the guy?" Freddie asked.

"Emma showed him to me when I picked her up from track practice," Sam explained. "He's on the football team, and they practice near each other."

"The football team..." Freddie repeated. "Oh, well that's...interesting."

"His name is Chase," Sam continued. "And well, I'm pretty sure Emma said that he shoves people like Neil in trashcans at school."

"I-What?" Freddie exclaimed. "But that's so...okay. Okay, I can handle this. I mean, he's a fourteen year old kid, right? He can't be _that _bad."

"Again, keep that in mind when you meet him," Sam said. "But, um, he's not fourteen."

"Um, fifteen then?" Freddie said hopefully.

"Sixteen."

"Sixteen?" Freddie exclaimed. "She can't go out with a sixteen year-old!"

"Okay, okay, but he's only one grade above her," Sam said quickly. "Emma said he got held back a year."

"I-I-Ah!" Freddie moaned, laying back on the bed. "What is Emma trying to do to me? Kill me?"

"I thought you said you were going to be fine with this," Sam smirked.

"Yeah, that was when I was expecting another Neil!" Freddie said. "Why's she going for someone like this Chase guy? Her and Ashton are twins! Shouldn't they be attracted to the same kinds of guys?"

"Um, no," Sam laughed. "I mean, look at me and Melanie. Her husband's nothing like you. He's really muscular and macho and-"

"Ahem."

"You know what I mean," Sam said. "Look, I know you're not exactly going to like Emma going out with this guy, but just give him a chance, okay? He's coming by to pick her up at seven, so you'll get a chance to meet him then. And you never know, he might wind up being a closet _Galaxy Wars _fan or have some other nerdy obsession like you!"

"He'd better," Freddie mumbled.

...

"How do you guys not like this?" Sam exclaimed.

"It makes no sense, it's a cow wearing a dress," Ashton frowned. "I don't get why you're so obsessed with it, mom."

"It's _Girly Cow!_" Sam said.

"But it's like, twenty years old," Carly's daughter, Clarissa pointed out.

"So? It's a classic!"

"I still think I prefer my cows not dressed up," Gibby's son, Quincy, said.

"Yeah, well, your mom is just as obsessed with this show as I was," Sam said to Clarissa. "And Quincy, your dad tried to write to channel _Girly Cow _was on to see if she could come to his sixteenth birthday party!"

"I'm not surprised," Quincy mumbled.

"Whatever," Ashton said. "Can you drive us to the mall?"

"Yeah, sure, after Emma leaves for her date," Sam nodded.

"With stupid Chase," Quincy mumbled.

"Why do you think Chase is stupid?" Clarissa asked.

"Because he's a jerky football player who thinks he's so special because he can throw a ball around!" Quincy said. "I don't know why Emma would want to be going out with _him._"

"Why do you care?" Ashton said.

"I don't," Quincy said quickly.

"Alright, Sam," Freddie said, walking into the room. "It's seven o'clock. Where's this Chase? Or can he not even pick my daughter up on time?"

"Wow, lack of punctuality, he really is perfect for Emma," Ashton said.

"Where _is _Emma?" Freddie asked.

"What?" Emma asked, walking into the room, wearing a pair of jeans and a simple top.

"_That's _what you're wearing on your date with Chase Mitchell?" Ashton frowned. "I told you, borrow one of my dresses!"

"We're going to a movie and then to the go cart track," Emma said, rolling her eyes.

"But Chase is the hottest guy in the tenth grade!" Clarissa said.

"The hottest guy in the-Sam!" Freddie hissed, turning to his wife. "You didn't say he was the hottest guy in the tenth grade!"

"Well I'm sorry for not sitting outside the high school and rating every guy who walked by to compare him with," Sam said, shaking her head.

"He's also the biggest punk of the tenth grade," Quincy mumbled.

"Hmm, Quincy, where's your date?" Emma said. "Oh that's right, you repel girls like the plague."

"I do not!"

"Em, come on, no low blows," Sam said, trying not to smile.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door.

"Alright, well, see you people," Emma said, heading towards the door.

"No, no," Freddie said, grabbing his daughter's shoulder. "I'll get it."

"Ugh, but you're going to talk to him and stuff!"

Freddie rolled his eyes as he opened the door. Standing on his front porch was a large, muscular boy. He must've weighed at least 200 pounds, and he towered over Freddie at over six feet.

"Um, hello," Freddie frowned, looking up at the boy. "You must be Chase. I'm Mr. Benson. Emma's dad."

"Oh yeah, 'sup, Mr. B?" Chase said. "Is Emma ready? Movie's going to start in ten minutes."

"Yeah, come in," Freddie said, gritting his teeth.

"Hey, Emma! Looking hot!" Chase said as he stepped into house.

"Thanks," Emma grinned. "Let me just go grab my bag and then we can go."

"Cool," Chase nodded. He looked over at Sam. "Hey, are you Emma's mom? Gotta say, I see where she gets her good looks from..."

"Okay!" Freddie said loudly. "Chase, could I have a word with you in the kitchen, please?"

"Whateves," Chase shrugged. He followed Freddie out of the living room.

"Alright," Freddie said, trying to keep his voice calm. "Listen, I'm sure you're a wonderful guy who's very attracted to my daughter-"

"Yeah," Chase nodded. "She's smoking!"

"Anyway," Freddie said, frowning. "Like I said, I'm sure you're great, but I'm Emma's father, and I need to make sure that she's happy."

"Oh, don't worry about that, Mr. B, I'll take care of her," Chase said. "I'll even pay for half her movie ticket tonight."

"How...thoughtful," Freddie said. He stepped closer to Chase. "But let me just make one thing clear, okay?" His voice was no longer casual, and he spoke with clear purpose. "If you hurt my daughter in anyway, if you make her cry, if you don't treat her with respect, if you do _anything _to her, I will make you pay. You might be a big football star who's _insanely _big, but trust me, I will make you pay, are we clear?"

"I-um-yeah," Chase, who had backed up into the counter, nodded, looking knocked down a peg. "G-Got it, Mr. B."

"Alright, Chase, I'm ready," Emma said, walking into the kitchen. "By dad, don't wait up!"

"Well seeing as you're going to be back by ten thirty, I think I can stay awake," Freddie said.

"Ten thirty?" Emma moaned.

"Yup," Freddie nodded. "So you'd better hurry up."

"Mom's right, you are a nub," Emma mumbled as her and Chase headed out of the kitchen.


	186. Chapter 186

**AN-So apparently the plot where Sam and Freddie move to Chicago is a pretty popular one, lol. Here's another continuation of the plot where Sam and Freddie took everyone out for some Chicago style pizza. Again, sorry that sequels for chapters are out of order, but I do requests in the order I get them. **

**...**

_Clause_

"Oh my God!" Carly said, her mouth full of pizza. "You weren't kidding; this stuff is amazing!"

"Right?" Sam smiled. "I'm telling you, the only place where you can get better pizza than this is in Italy itself."

"My mouth is _so _happy right now," Spencer said, taking a bite of his slice.

"It would taste better with a smoothie," T-Bo mumbled.

"Teebs, Chicago's just not that big on smoothies," Freddie said, carefully pouring red pepper flakes onto his pizza.

"Well then Chicago doesn't know how to live, now does it?"

"Hey, Sam," Gibby said, swallowing his pizza. "You're going to have the baby before Christmas, right?"

"Yeah, two days before it," Sam nodded, eyeing Freddie's slice of pizza, which he was now adding parmesan cheese to. "Why?"

"Well I was thinking..." Gibby said. "That I could dress up as Santa Clause for the little baby!"

"What?" Carly frowned. "Why would you want to do that?"

"Because I happen to have a lot of respect for the guy," Gibby snapped. "Going to every house in the world in one night, checking up on all the little kids, having to deal with the annoying elves and all their 'union talk'. I mean the guy pays them in cookies, what more can they want?"

The others looked at each other. They had learned to just go with these Gibby moments.

"I was actually thinking of dressing up as Santa Clause for the baby," Spencer said.

"No way, I called it!" Gibby said loudly.

"Well _I _brought a Santa costume, so ha!" Spencer said triumphantly.

"So did I!" Gibby retorted.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Carly said. "There was enough room in the car for two Santa Clause costumes, but not enough room for me to bring my shoe suitcase?"

"Or my golf bag?" T-Bo exclaimed.

"You play golf?" Sam frowned.

"Yes," T-Bo said. "What? T-Bo can't play golf? I have other skills besides smoothie crafting, you know!"

"Look, guys, it's really nice that you both want to dress up as Santa for the baby," Freddie said to Spencer and Gibby. "But I don't think the kid will even notice at two days old."

"Yes, baby's absorb these kinds of things," Spencer told him. "They're like little sponges."

"Well then why can't both of you dress up?" Sam asked.

"Two Santa's?" Gibby scoffed, insulted. "Please, why don't we just elect two presidents, or have two Groundhog's Days, or have two belly buttons?"

"That would be so cool," Spencer said. "I'm always saying life would be easier with an extra belly button."

"You know, I thought it was supposed to be the Easter Bunny that came on Christmas," T-Bo frowned.

"What?" Sam exclaimed.

"T-Bo, why would the _Easter _Bunny bring presents on _Christmas_?" Carly pointed out.

"I don't know, my mamma never read me fairy tales," T-Bo defended.

"But she clearly dropped you on your head," Sam mumbled.

"So do I get to be Santa Clause or not?" Gibby asked.

"I get to be him!" Spencer argued.

"How about one of you dresses up for half the time," Freddie suggested. "And the other for the other half?"

"Fine," Gibby conceded. "But the real Santa Clause would never put up with these conditions. If you were still a kid, you'd be at the top of the Naughty List by now."

"Wait, so if the Easter Bunny doesn't come on Christmas," T-Bo said. "Then when does the Tooth Fairy come into the picture?"

"You know I almost caught the tooth fairy when I was nine," Gibby said. "But then it turned out to just be my turtle."

"And then who comes on Labor Day?" T-Bo continued. "Is there like some Labor Day Dog or something?"

"A _Labor_dor?" Carly laughed.

"I don't get that," Spencer frowned.

"You know," Freddie said, smiling at Sam. "I've really missed this."

"Yeah," Sam nodded as T-Bo and Spencer began a heated discussion about leprechauns. "Me too."


	187. Chapter 187

**AN-So I got this request, and I thought that since it sort of went with a request I got shortly before, why not just make it a sequel to it? So this chapter is a follow up to chapter 185, where Freddie threatens Emma's first boyfriend. **

…**.**

_Dust_

"Hey, daddy?" Ashton said, walking into the living room with Quincy and carrying her pink pearbook. "My laptop's acting up again. Can you fix it?"

"Yeah, sure, sweetie," Freddie nodded, taking her computer. "What's wrong with it?"

"Quincy and I are trying to add some pictures to our slideshow for our English project, but it won't let us," Ashton explained.

"I thought Emma was supposed to be working with you guys on this," Freddie said, typing a few commands onto the computer.

"She is," Quincy mumbled.

"She's out with Chase again," Ashton said.

"Oh...Chase," Fredde said darkly. "Stupid Chase."

"Pathetic Chase, is more like it," Quincy said. "You know today in my math class, it took him five minutes to figure out what twelve times four was?"

"What a moron," Freddie laughed.

"But he's so amazing looking, it doesn't matter," Ashton pointed out. "Though not more amazing looking than my Neil...Gross, daddy! What are we watching?"

She cringed at the T.V, which was showing a close up view of a bug-like creature.

"Oh, it's just some documentary on the horrors of dust mites," Freddie said. "Your mom and Emma wanted me to record it. I'll turn it off if you don't-"

"Wait, no, I've seen this before," Quincy said. "It's really interesting!"

"Dude, we have a project to finish," Ashton reminded him.

"I know," Quincy nodded. "But a little break couldn't hurt..."

"Hey, my dust mite show!" Sam said happily, walking into the room and plopping herself down next to Freddie.

"How can you watch this?" Ashton said. "It's disgusting!"

"Well yeah, but that's what's so awesome about it!" Sam said.

Just then, they heard the front door of the house slam open.

"Oh, hey, Emma, you have to help us finish our project!" Ashton said to her twin sister as she passed into the living room.

"Leave me alone," Emma mumbled, throwing her bag on the floor and hurrying upstairs. A few seconds later they heard her door slam shut.

"Was she crying?" Freddie whispered to Sam.

"Yeah," Sam nodded looking serious.

"What happened?" Ashton asked, frowning, concerned for her sister.

"I don't know," Freddie said. He handed her back her computer. "Why don't you and Quincy go finish up your project in my office?"

"Okay," Ashton nodded. "Come on, Quince."

Quincy, who had been staring up the stairs where Emma had just run up, followed her.

"Well, guess we should see what's up," Sam sighed, getting to her feet. "Though I'm guessing it's not going to be good."

Her and Freddie walked upstairs to the twins bedroom.

"Emma," Freddie said, knocking on the door. "Emma, are you okay?"

"Go away," came the muffled voice of his daughter.

"Em," Sam said. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing!"

Sam and Freddie exchanged concerned looks before Sam opened the door.

Emma was laying on her bed, staring up at the ceiling, her eyes red and her cheeks tearstained.

"Sweetie," Freddie said softly, sitting down with Sam at the edge of Emma's bed. "Why are you crying?"

"I'm not crying, okay!" Emma snapped.

"Emma," Sam said knowingly. "What happened?"

"I don't want to talk about it," Emma mumbled, hugging one of her pillows.

"Um, okay," Sam nodded. She gave Freddie a look. "Your dad and I will just go then and-"

"Chase dumped me!"

Anger boiled in Freddie's blood. How dare that boy do this to his daughter! The second he got his hands on him...

"Aw, Emma," Sam said, putting her arms around her.

"He told me I wasn't what he thought I would be," Emma cried. "He thought I'd practically be his little cheerleader and just drool over him around the clock, like I don't have a life! And tonight, he told me that he was going to be working out at the gym tomorrow, and he wanted me to be there to see how much he could bench. I told him that I was hanging out with some girls from the tack team tomorrow, and then he dumped me! He said I obviously wasn't 'devoted' enough to him!"

"Come here, Em," Freddie said, sitting down on her other side and pulling her into a hug. "Listen to me. You are an amazing girl."

"Gee thanks," Emma said, rolling her eyes. "Where'd you get that one? Your dad handbook?"

"He's right, Emma," Sam chuckled.

"You're strong-minded, independent, and smart," Freddie said. "There's no guy in the world that could ever change that about you."

"So what? I'm just supposed to be the lonely tough girl for the rest of my life?" Emma said.

"No," Freddie said. "One day you'll meet someone who won't _want _to change that about you."

"Yeah," Sam said. "I mean, I found one, didn't I?"

"Great, I'll marry someone like dad," Emma mumbled.

"Not necessarily someone _just _like him," Sam smiled. "You'll find him, though, Em. Trust us."

"Okay," Emma sighed. "Not to be rude or anything, but can you guys leave now? I sort of want to be alone now. Plus, before I came home, I snuck Chases's phone out of his pocket and I have some _very _embarrassing photos to upload to the school's website..."

"You sure you're okay?" Freddie asked gently.

Emma shrugged. "I guess."

Sam kissed the top of her head. "Chase was a total stubrag."

"A huge one," Freddie smiled as him and Sam got up off the bed.

"You guys still never told me what a stubrag was," Emma pointed out.

"And we're not going to," Sam grinned. "Night, Em."

"And remember, if you want to talk to us, we're right down the hall," Freddie said. "Oh, and when you're uploading those pictures, _please _make sure that they can't be traced back to our IP address. We don't need another government guy coming over here again."

"Got it," Emma nodded, typing away at her computer.

"I'm going to kill that Chase," Freddie said as him and Sam closed the door behind them. "He made her cry!"

"Baby, Chase is ten times your size," Sam said. "He'd pound you like a rock."

"Not when I'm fueled with rage!"

"Whatever you say," Sam smiled. "Man, Emma's just like me, isn't she?"

"You've just noticed?" Freddie grinned.

"I'm serious Fredbag," Sam said. "I know exactly what she felt like tonight! Do you know how hard it is when some guy to dump you because you're too intimidating and won't sit around like his little puppet?"

"Which guys were those?" Freddie frowned. "Jonah? Pete?"

"Pretty much all of them except you," Sam said, leaning up to kiss her husband. "And if Emma's lucky, she'll find a guy who she loves just as much too."

...

_Later that evening_

Emma, wearing a pair of old sweatpants and oversized pajama shirt yawned as she headed downstairs into the kitchen. She was still feeling too upset to sleep, so she figured she might as well eat.

"Quincy?" Emma frowned, stopping in her tracks as she spotted the boy sitting on her living room couch, watching T.V. "Why are _you _here?"

"Oh, it's raining pretty hard outside, so your parents told my parents not to worry about picking me up," Quincy explained, looking over at her. "So I'm sleeping on the couch."

"Ugh, could you at least not be sitting in _my _seat?" Emma moaned. "I don't need it clogged up with your-Hey, is that the dust mite documentary?"

"Yeah," Quincy grinned. "It's one of my favorites. Do you want to watch with me?"

"Uh, yeah!" Emma nodded, hurrying over to the couch and sitting next to him. "I love this! Those things look so gross! It's awesome! Rewind it so I can see the beginning, Quinert!"


	188. Chapter 188

**AN-I'm glad so many of you liked the idea of Quincy and Emma together last chapter. Perhaps I will build on that in the future...In the meantime, I still have several requests to get through, but I promise, you'll see more of them in the future. **

**...**

_Twin_

"Man, I love it when we both get days off on the same day," Freddie said, his arms wrapped around his wife.

"Yeah, nice little coincidences, don't you think?" Sam smiled up at him, putting her head on his shoulders.

"You hacked into the studio's computers and made this happen, didn't you?" Freddie said knowingly.

"Maybe," Sam said playfully. "But come on, baby, we had _a lot _of fun today while we had the house to ourselves with the kids at school, didn't we?"

"Hey, I'm not complaining," Freddie said. "But speaking of the kids, don't you have to go pick up Tyler soon?"

"Oh, yeah," Sam said, glancing over at the clock. "And then I have to drive Jason over to the DMV right after so he can try for the _third _time to get his license."

"Tell him I said good luck," Freddie laughed.

"I will," Sam said. "The twins should be home in about ten minutes. If I'm not back by five, you'll have to drive Emma to her soccer game."

"Got it," Freddie nodded.

After Sam had left, Freddie had just begun watching an old episode of _Celebrities Under Water_, when he heard the front door of the house swing open.

"Mom!" he heard one of the girls call.

"She's picking up your brothers and then going take Jason to get his license...hopefully," Freddie said as the girls walked into the living room.

"Why?" Emma said. "He's just going to fail again.

"When's she going to be back?" her twin sister, Ashton, asked. "Soon?"

"I don't know, it's probably going to be crowded at the DMV," Freddie said. "Why do you need her?"

"We need her to teach us something," Ashton replied.

"Well I can do it," Freddie said. "What is it? Something for school?"

"Kind of, but not like math or history or anything," she explained. "It's-It's just we found out today that the seventh grade dance is going to have some slow songs."

"Which is why I don't want to go even more than I didn't want to go before," Emma said. "But her and Clarissa are making me."

"We sort of wanted mom to teach us how do dance," Ashton told her father. "Like...slow dance."

"As in with boys?" Freddie asked, raising an eyebrow.

Ashton nodded. "I really want this one boy to dance with me, dad, he's so cute!"

"He's uglier than Quincy," Emma said, rolling her eyes. "And _that's _saying something. Don't worry, dad," she added. "I'm not doing any slow songs."

"But I heard Mikey Liriman was thinking of asking you to dance," Ashton said, grinning.

"Um, who's Mikey Liriman?" Freddie asked, but neither of his daughters seemed to hear him.

"He is not," Emma said, though her cheeks were turning red.

"I heard it from Zach Bryant, who's like, his best friend," Ashton said. "Trust me, it's true."

"Fine, I'll slow dance," Emma said, rolling her eyes, clearly trying to hold back a smile. "But if mom's not back soon, we won't even have time to learn! The dance is tomorrow night!"

"Hey, you know," Freddie said. "_I _can teach you."

The girls stared at their father.

"You?" Emma said. "But you can't dance!"

"Yeah, daddy, this is really important," Ashton nodded. "Mom has more experience with dance than you."

"Hey, I learned a few moves for my wedding," Freddie said. "I know my way around a dance floor."

Emma choked back a laugh. "Yeah, sure you do, dad."

"I'm serious!" Freddie said. "Look, as much as you two dancing with..._boys _kills me, I'm willing to teach you girls how to slow dance. You're both growing up now, and, well, I just have to get used to it. So come on."

"Come on where?" Emma asked.

"The basement, there's more space," Freddie said.

He led the twins down to the basement, which over the years had become something of an entertainment room, but there was still a large empty space that would be perfect for dancing.

"Okay," Freddie said, going through a pile of CD's by the stereo. "First thing you should know, is that the guy leads and the girls-"

"I'm not going to let the guy lead!" Emma said indignantly.

"Just think of Mikey," Ashton said, and Emma fell quiet.

"Seriously, who is this kid?" Freddie frowned. "Alright, never mind. Anyway," he put the CD into the stereo and a slow song began to play. "The dancing isn't actually to difficult. Em, come here."

Emma stood in front of her father.

"So the girls usually put their hands on the guys shoulders-"

"I can't reach your shoulders," Emma said.

"Fine," Freddie sighed. He crouched down a bit, and Emma put her hands on his shoulders.

"Good," Freddie said. "Now the guy usually puts his hands on the girls waist. But make sure his hands _stay _there! Don't let his hands go down or up. If you do, Emma, beat him up, Ashton, call Emma to beat him up."

"Sweet," Emma grinned.

"Okay," Freddie said. "Now you just sort of step and step back in a nice little rhythm. Ashton, come here."

Ashton took her sisters place and Freddie began to step to the music with her.

"There you go, you're doing good!" Freddie encouraged her.

"No I'm not, I keep stepping on your feet!" Ashton moaned.

"Well any boy you're dancing with will have smaller feet than me," Freddie told her. "So you won't have to worry about that."

"Let me try," Emma said. Freddie danced with her as well, and though Emma proclaimed the whole time that she thought dancing was stupid, Freddie could see the slightest of grins on her face.

As Freddie danced with each of his daughters, he suddenly realized just how much they both looked like Sam. They each had long blonde hair, though theirs was pin straight in contrast to Sam's curls. But they had the same facial features, the same expressions (especially Emma), and they were both relatively short in stature. The only thing, appearance wise, that they seemed to have inherited from him were their eyes. And he knew that unfortunately, many boys were bound to find them attractive.

"I can't wait for tomorrow night, daddy!" Ashton said excitedly. "I have to go call Clarissa!"

"Yeah, and I have to go eat something," Emma said, rubbing her stomach.

As Freddie watched his two girls head back upstairs, he couldn't help feel a pang of sadness. For it seemed like just yesterday that the thought of dancing with boys would've disgusted them. He let out a sigh. They really _were_ growing up.


	189. Chapter 189

**AN-So the request for this actually came with another sort of subplot, but due the the aging I have all of the Seddie kids at, it wouldn't have really worked. So I'm going to upload the rest of the request next chapter.**

…

_Dealing_

"No!"

"Jason, come on," Sam said, trying to wrestle the four-year old's _Galaxy Wars_ action figure out of his hands. "You need to pack up your toys!"

"I don't want to move!" Jason said firmly.

"Honey, it's not even that far away," Sam said. "We just need more space for when the babies come in a few months."

"They can share my room," Jason said.

"I don't think you're going to want your two baby sisters in here once you realize how much they wake up at night crying," Sam smiled.

"I'm not moving!" Jason said again.

"You know what," Sam sighed. "I'm letting your dad deal with this when he gets home."

"I want to stay here!" Jason said, sitting himself down on his bed.

Sam left her son's room and headed into the small living room of her and Freddie's two-bedroom apartment, where she began to pack away more of the family's belongings.

"Hey," Freddie said, walking through the door. "How's-Sam! I told you not to worry about packing! I'll do it! Go sit down and rest."

"Freddie, for the love of chiz, I'm pregnant, not diseased," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Pregnant with _twins_," Freddie pointed out. "That's double the strain on you. Seriously, baby, any other time, you'd be more than happy to sit on the couch while I did all the packing, why are you changing the system now?"

"I'm only packing my special vintage _Girly Cow_ figurines," Sam said. "You know, the important stuff. Don't worry, I left the hard things for you."

"Good," Freddie said, kissing her. "So, is Jason finally starting to pack some of his things?"

"Nope," Sam replied. "He still refuses to move."

"He does realize that we're moving about ten minutes away, right?"

"I've told him," Sam said. "But he says he doesn't want to leave his room, or the balcony, and his friends in the building. Go fix it."

Sam sat herself down on the couch and turned on the T.V.

"No, no, no," Freddie said, grabbing the remote from his wife. "I'm not doing that alone. You're coming with me, Sam."

"You just told me to rest!"

"Is talking to a four-year old really that straining?" Freddie asked, raising an eyebrow. "Come on, this is serious. Jason's obviously going through some real problems regarding the move, and it's important for both of us to sit down and discuss the issue with him."

"Oh my God, _please _stop reading every book your mom gives us," Sam moaned.

"There's some good stuff in there," Freddie defended.

"Alright, alright," Sam sighed. "Let's do it."

Freddie helped her to her feet and the two of them walked to their son's room. Jason was sitting on his bed, flipping through a picture book.

"Hey, Jason," Freddie said as him and Sam sat down at the edge of the bed.

"Hi, daddy," Jason said, looking up from his book.

"So," Freddie said, looking around at the empty boxes scattered about the room. "Your mom tells me that you don't want to move."

"Uh-uh," Jason said, shaking his head. "I want to stay right here."

"But Jason," Freddie said. "You know there's not going to be enough room for five people in this tiny apartment."

"Yes there will," Jason argued.

"Sweetie, you know that's not true," Sam said.

"Yeah, those two little babies are going to take up a _lot _of space," Freddie said. "And you saw our new house; that place is plenty big. You'll get a much bigger room for all of your toys, _plus _a back yard with a pool. And maybe I can try and build you a playground out there too."

Sam scoffed, and Freddie shot her a look.

"But I'm going to miss my friends," Jason said.

"Well you'll still see them," Sam said. "You'll still go to your same preschool, and I promise, even though I hate most of their mothers, I'll set you up play dates and deal with the whack jobs."

"Sam," Freddie sighed.

"What? One lady has dresses her poodle up in a special little outfit every day!"

"Anyway," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "The point is, Jason, is that even though we're going to be moving to a new house, things will still be the same. We promise. The only difference will be that in two months, you'll be a big brother. And you're excited about that, aren't you?"

Jason nodded.

"And you know," Sam said. "I think I saw some kids your age playing outside the last time I went to the house. Maybe you could make some new friends."

"Did they look like they like _Galaxy Wars_?" Jason asked thoughtfully.

"Um, I don't know," Sam said. "But, despite what daddy may say, _Galaxy Wars _isn't the most important thing to look for in a friend. It's what type of snacks they have, and I'm pretty sure I saw these kids eating giant chocolate chip cookies."

Jason's eyes widened. "You did? I want some!"

"Well then you better start packing your toys so we can move," Sam laughed. "Come on, daddy will help you."

"Uh-huh," Freddie nodded. "Let's get this stuff packed."

"And in the meantime," Sam said, getting up. "Mommy's going to take a very long nap..."

Freddie waited until she left the room before turning to his son.

"Okay, Jason, don't listen to mommy on that whole _Galaxy Wars _thing," he said. "If those kids at the new house don't like it, invite them over and I'll show you guys the trilogy and we'll _make _them learn to love it."


	190. Chapter 190

_Blast_

"Sam, you realize that no many how many emails you send to The Rib House, they _probably _won't reopen," Freddie said, walking into the living room with a stack of mail.

"Oh, we'll see about that," Sam said, quickly typing away on her laptop. "Once they see what a loyal customer I was, they'll have to reopen."

"Baby, they got shut down for having rats in the kitchen," Freddie pointed out. "I don't even know why you would want to eat at a place like that."

"Oh come on, the rats were in the kitchen, not where the customers could see them," Sam said rolling her eyes. "Stop being such a priss."

"You're just being impossible," Freddie chuckled, sitting down next to her. "And by the way, the mail just came. It got here early."

"Did my numchucks catalogue come?"

"No, I don't think so."

"Then don't interrupt me, Fredhead," Sam said, turning back to her computer. "Mama's gonna get her ribs back if it's the last thing she does!"

Freddie smiled as he began opening the envelopes. As he opened the envelope containing his credit card statement, though, his smile faltered.

"Sam!"

"What? I told you, don't interrupt me!" Sam snapped. "I need to-"

"Why do I have a 800 dollar charge on my credit card?"

"Um, I don't know," Sam frowned. "Maybe you should ask yourself that since it's _your _card."

"Please, you use my card for your little online shopping sprees at WeirdNovelty .com all the time," Freddie said.

"I haven't bought anything from there in two months," Sam defended. She grabbed the statement from her husband and looked at it herself. "And see, the charge didn't even come from that site! It came from…the Seattle Department of Traffic Tickets?"

"Wow, really Sam?" Freddie sighed. "You got a speeding ticket, didn't you? I've told you a million times, you need to work on that! It's dangerous, it sets a bad example for the kids-"

"Hey, I don't speed," Sam said.

Freddie gave her a knowing look.

"Okay fine, I don't speed when the kids are in the car," Sam corrected. "And I never get tickets! Whenever I get pulled over, I just pull a Carly and act all sweet and scared and start crying."

"Well then why is this charge here?" Freddie asked.

"Again, how should I know, it's your card," Sam said. "But if you're going to be all annoying about it, go on the website and look up the charge."

"Fine, I will," Freddie said, taking Sam's laptop. He pulled up the ticket center's website and typed in a few commands.

"Let's see," Freddie mumbled. "Here it is. The ticket was issued on April 5th on Brooks road for going 60 miles in a 40 mile zone to a blue jeep."

"Blue jeep?" Sam repeated. "Dude, that's Jason's car."

"Jason got a speeding ticket?" Freddie frowned.

"Looks like it," Sam said. "And apparently he's been hiding it from us for almost a month."

"You know, he _has _been getting the mail for us a lot lately," Freddie said. "I bet you he was trying to get to the credit card bill before me so he could hide it!"

"Man, I can't believe we're out 800 bucks," Sam said. "I'm going to kill Jason…"

As if on cue, Sam and Freddie's sixteen-year old son walked downstairs.

"Hey, mom, dad," Jason said brightly. "I'll just go get the mail and then I was thinking I'd drive over to-"

"Sit," Sam said firmly. "You are in _so _much trouble."

"I-I am?" Jason frowned. "Um, why?"

"We managed to get to the mail before you today," Freddie said, holding up the credit card bill. "Mind explaining the 800 dollar speeding ticket issued to _your _car on here?"

"Oh, um, that," Jason said, looking at his feet. "It-It wasn't my fault-"

"You were going 20 miles over the speed limit!" Sam exclaimed. "Of course it was your fault!"

"Everyone speeds on Brooks!" Jason argued. "But I'm the only one the officer pulled over!"

"We don't care what everyone else does," Freddie said. "When we bought you that car, you promised us you'd be a safe driver, and wouldn't do any of that stuff!"

"It was just that one time," Jason mumbled. "I was late for the robotics club meeting."

"Look," Freddie said. "Jason, as mad as we are that you were speeding-"

"And we're _very _mad about that," Sam said.

"What we're mad about the most is the fact that you tried to hide it, instead of just coming to us," Freddie finished. "Sure, we probably would've taken your keys from you for awhile, but at least you would've been honest about it."

"I'm sorry," Jason said, hanging his head. "Next time I promise I'll tell you."

"Oh, you'd better _hope _there isn't a next time for this," Sam said.

"So, how long am I grounded for?" Jason sighed.

"A month with no keys sound fair, Sam?" Freddie asked.

"Yup, hand them over, kid," Sam said, holding her hand out to her son.

"A month?" Jason exclaimed.

"Yeah, a month," Freddie nodded.

Jason groaned as he reluctantly handed over his keys to his mother.

"And," Sam continued. "Your dad and I aren't going to be the ones to pay off this ticket either. You got it, you pay for it."

"Where am I supposed to get 800 bucks from?" Jason asked.

"Well, there are these things called jobs," Freddie said. "You work at them, and then, in exchange for your labor, you're _usually _paid in money."

"A job?" Jason repeated. "You've got to be kidding me. I can't get a job!"

"Why not?" Sam asked. "Unless you have a better way to come up with 800 bucks, you don't have a choice."

"Where would I even work?" Jason moaned. "The Pear store doesn't hire until the Fall."

"Don't worry," Freddie said, pulling out his pearphone. "I know _exactly _where you can work."

…..

"I need to use your oven," Carly said, carrying a large tray of cupcake tins into the Benson's kitchen.

"How many of those things are you baking?" Sam asked, amused.

"Fourteen dozen," Carly replied. "Why did I volunteer for this again?"

"Because that stupid PTA thing brainwashed you," Sam said. "Hey, can I lick some of that batter-?"

"No!" Carly exclaimed, swatting away her hand. "I was up all morning making that batter!"

"Well," Sam said indignantly.

Just then Jason, wearing a bright orange polo shirt, stomped into the kitchen with a scowl on his face.

"Aw, look who's ready for his first day of work," Sam grinned.

"I still can't believe you're making me do this," Jason mumbled.

"You made him get a job at the Groovy Smoothie?" Carly frowned.

"He owes me and Freddie 800 bucks!" Sam defended.

"But I worked there for a day," Carly said. "And it was the worst experience of my life. Seriously, I wouldn't want my kid to work there."

"Thank you," Jason said. "See, at least Aunt Carly's on my side, mom."

"Then get the 800 bucks from her, and you don't have to work," Sam shrugged.

"Er, sorry, Jason, can't help you there," Carly said.

"Alright," Jason sighed. "I guess if I want to be on time, we should leave now. It would be a lot easier if I had my car back and could drive myself to work-"

"Not happening," Sam said, grabbing her own car keys. "Now let's move it, kid."

…..

"What are you covered in?" Freddie frowned later that evening as Jason walked through the front door with Sam after his first day of work.

"Smoothie gunk," Jason said.

"So how was the first day?" Freddie asked as Jason collapsed into a chair.

"He complained the whole way home," Sam said.

"Because the job's the worst job in the world!" Jason exclaimed. "I had to deal with annoying customers all day who change their orders ten times from a Strawberry Blast to a Blueberry Blitz, T-Bo made me clean out all the juicers and blenders, I had to unclog the toilets in the men's bathroom, _and _T-Bo made me spend two hours trying to put granola bars on a stick to sell!"

"Look, you'll make the 800 dollars in no time, and then if you really want to, you can quit," Freddie said.

"That'll take forever, though," Jason said. "Can't you guys just let me take the money out of my college fund or something?"

"Jason, come on, the first day of a job is always the worst," Sam said. "It'll get better and who knows, you might actually _want _to keep working there after you make the money to pay back your dad an I."

"I doubt it," Jason mumbled getting to his feet. "I'm gonna go try and scrub the orange peels out of ears…"

Freddie watched Jason head upstairs before turning to Sam. "You know, considering the fact that both of us did terrible at our first jobs, I'd say we're pretty hypocritical parents."

"Eh, all parents are," Sam shrugged. "And for the record, Chile My Bowl was a _way _worse place to work than the Groovy Smoothie. I'm just glad that one guy gave me all that money so I could quit or who knows how long I would've been stuck working there."

Freddie grinned. "Oh yeah, that guy…"

"What?" Sam frowned.

"Nothing."

"I still wonder why he just gave me an envelope full of money," Sam continued. "But hey, I'm not going to complain."

"Just good luck, I guess," Freddie smiled.

"You know," Sam sighed. "Thinking back to how terrible that job was…I feel sort of bad for making Jason do this. I mean, you saw how miserable the poor kid was!"

"Well yeah, I feel bad too, seeing him like that," Freddie nodded. "But we can't just go back on what we said."

"I know," Sam sighed. "But hey! What if the two of us found someone and gave him the 800 bucks to give Jason as like a tip or something so he could quit his job and pay us back?"

Freddie nearly choked on his iced tea. "You mean like that guy did to you at Chile My Bowl?"

"Yeah, only this will be planned," Sam nodded.

"Um, okay," Freddie nodded.

"Good," Sam said. "I'll run to the ATM then."

Freddie waited until his wife was out the door before he pulled out his pearphone.

"Um, Carls?" he said into it. "You never got around to telling Sam about that whole Chile My Bowl incident, did you?"


	191. Chapter 191

_Help_

"You did _what?_" Sam frowned, putting down her ham sandwich.

"I got talked into it, okay!" Freddie defended.

"Dude, how can could you do that?" Sam moaned. "You know I hate parties."

"Yes, I know," Freddie said. "And I'm sorry, but-"

"I mean, for the love of bacon, we just had a huge party for our wedding two months ago!" Sam continued. "And now we're having a housewarming party? We're not even unpacked yet!"

"Well if _someone _would help me with that…" Freddie mumbled, earning him a punch in the shoulder from Sam.

"Hey, most of the junk in the boxes is _your _stuff," Sam pointed out.

"We're married, Sam, everything is _ours _now," Freddie reminded her.

"Yeah, well, there's no way all of your lame _Galaxy Wars_ junk is ever going to be mine," Sam said. "And stop changing the subject! I can't believe you told Carly were having a housewarming party tonight!"

"I told you, she talked me into it!" Freddie said. "Besides, it's not really a party. It's just going to be Carly, Spencer, T-Bo and Gibby. We hang out with them all the time, so really, it's just like a normal night."

"Oh," Sam said. "Well then I guess that's not too bad…I can probably get Spencer to make spaghetti tacos for us."

"See, no big deal," Freddie smiled, wrapping his arms around his wife and kissing her.

"Yeah, I guess it's cool," Sam said when they pulled apart. "Sorry for freaking out on you."

"Don't worry about it, I've told you a million times, you look really hot when you're angry," Freddie laughed. "Scary, yes, but it's _very _attractive on you."

Sam grinned. "I can look attractive with _any _expression, Fredbug."

"I know," Freddie agreed. "Oh, and, one other thing…my mom _might've _heard me and Carly talking about the party and I _might've_, sort of, invited her too…"

"Freddie!"

….

"Man, this place is huge!" Carly said, walking into Sam and Freddie's new house.

"It's only three bedrooms, Carls," Sam said.

"Yeah, but it's still big," Spencer said, coming in behind his sister. "I mean look at the size of the kitchen!"

"That _was_ the deciding factor for Sam," Freddie smiled.

"So who's ready to party?" T-Bo asked, wheeling in a large cart of smoothies. "I've got us fourteen new flavors of smoothies to sample, _and _I brought my darts so we can have a _really _fun time!"

"And I brought my cat!" Gibby said proudly, holding up a pet carrier.

"Gib, it's empty," Freddie said, looking into it.

"Aw, man!" Gibby moaned. "Ruffles escaped again!"

"This is going to be fun," Carly said. "We haven't gotten to hang out together in ages."

"Yeah, well, it's not going to be just us," Sam said. "_Fredward _decided to invite his crazy mom here too."

"What? Why would you do that?" Spencer exclaimed.

"Because she heard me telling Carly about it and then she guilted me into it, okay?" Freddie said.

"Man, every time I see that woman she gives me a lecture on proper nutrition," T-Bo moaned. "As if smoothies don't have all the daily essential vitamins and nutrients in them."

"Yeah, and she keeps trying to get me to walk around with an 'emergency pair of socks' in my pocket," Gibby said. "And I try to explain to her that with my emergency suspenders in there, nothing else will fit, but she just won't drop it."

"Guys, come on, I guarantee you she'll be gone in a few hours," Freddie said. "She doesn't like staying out late. So once she leaves we can actually have a good time."

There was a knock at the door.

"Well I'm not getting that," Sam said.

Freddie rolled his eyes as he headed to the door.

"What are we supposed to do while she's here?" Spencer whispered. "She hates everything enjoyable."

"Come on, don't exaggerate," Carly said. "Sure she's…not your first choice for a party guest, but she's not that bad."

"Try having her as a mother-in-law, Carls," Sam said, shaking her head. "Its only been two months, but I'm still ready to get out my butter sock…"

"Hello everybody," Marissa Benson said, walking into the living room with Freddie.

The group mumbled a less-than-enthusiastic hello.

"So, um, what do you have there in the container, Mrs. Benson?" Carly asked, nodding at the large container in the woman's hands.

"Oh I just brought us all some nice dinner for tonight," she replied. "Stuffed eggplant with a nice beat topping."

"Um, as…_delicious _as that sounds," Sam cringed. "Spencer made us spaghetti tacos, so we're actually good on food."

"Yeah," Spencer said, holding up a container of his own. "It has a new sauce and everything!"

"Oh, those won't do at all," Marissa said, walking over to Spencer and taking the container right out of his hands.

"Hey!" Spencer objected.

"Now, now, you'll thank me for this your next doctor's appointment and your cholesterol isn't through the roof," Marissa said, dumping the tacos in the trash.

"My cholesterol is perfect, thank you very much," T-Bo said.

"Yes, maybe," Marissa nodded, looking at him. "But I think _somebody _could stand to loose some of that extra blubber around his stomach."

T-Bo gasped. "Hey! That's just baby fat!"

"Dude, there's no way we're eating your mom's eggplant chiz," Sam hissed to Freddie as Marissa headed into the kitchen to start setting the table.

"Yeah," Gibby nodded. "I was promised a night of fun and spaghetti tacos. I gave up quilting night at the community center for this, you know!"

"Guys, I can't just kick my mother out!" Freddie said.

"Why not?" Spencer asked. "She kicked my tacos out! Right into the trash…poor little guys."

"Hey, we can still have a fun little party tonight," Carly said. "Like Freddie said, she'll be going home soon."

"Were you born this optimistic, or did you just become this way over time?" Sam asked.

"And good news!" Marissa called, sticking her head out the kitchen. "I brought my overnight bag with me so I can sleep in the guest room! Isn't that great? You know I don't like driving at night, and I didn't want to leave all the fun early, so I thought this was the perfect solution!"

"So-So you'll be here all night then?" Carly frowned.

"Yes, stupid," Marissa sighed. "I just said that."

"Not so happy now, are we?" Sam said once Marissa was back in the kitchen.

"Tonight's going to suck," Carly mumbled.

…..

While Mrs. Benson seemed to thoroughly enjoy herself throughout the night, the others had a less pleasant time. After several rounds of bingo, not-so-crazy eights, and bridge, they were all resenting the woman very much in their heads.

"Man, I can't believe I have to call that nutbag of a woman my mother-in-law," Sam said to Carly later that evening as the two girls headed into the kitchen.

"And you guys have the same names; you're both Mrs. Benson," Carly grinned.

"Shut up, Shay," Sam snapped, grabbing a bag of chips. "This is your fault."

"I'm sorry, you know I like parties," Carly said.

"Samantha," Marissa said, walking into the kitchen. "I need to talk with you."

"Okay," Sam shrugged.

Marissa glanced over at Carly. "Alone."

"No problem," Carly said quickly. "See you two."

"What is it?" Sam sighed. "Are you going to lecture me on how much sodium these chips have or something?"

"Well, no," Marissa said. "But they _are _very unhealthy. I wanted to talk to you about something else, though. As much as it pains me, you and my Freddiebear are married."

Sam held her tongue, and let her continue.

"And as a married couple, you two have a long road ahead of you. And I would just like an estimate on when I can expect you two to take your next step."

"Next step?" Sam repeated.

"Yes, you know, children," Marissa said.

Sam nearly choked on her chips. "What?"

"Every other woman in my Germ Awareness group has grandchildren," Marissa said simply. "I'd like to know when I can expect mine."

"Freddie and I _just _got married," Sam said, hardly believing the conversation she was having.

"Yes, two months ago," Marissa nodded. "Plenty of time for you and Freddie to conceive a-"

"Okay, okay," Sam said quickly. "Look, Freddie and I _do _want kids-"

"Perfect!" Marissa said happily. "So just give me a rough estimate of when I can-"

"-Eventually," Sam finished. "We want to actually have a chance to be a married couple first, though. You know, do things just the two of us before we have to worry about taking care of any kids."

"But that's not fair to me!" Marissa exclaimed.

"What's not fair?" Freddie asked, walking into the kitchen.

"Your wife is trying to deprive me of becoming a grandmother!"

Freddie cast a confused glance over to Sam. "What?"

"I told you, we _want _kids," Sam told her. "But not now, right Freddie?"

"Oh yeah, definitely not now," Freddie said. "We're just starting out, mom. We'd both like to get a little further in our jobs before we start a family."

"So I'm just supposed to remain grandchildless?" Marissa frowned.

"Mom, I'm sorry, but it's mine and Sam's decision, not yours," Freddie said.

"Fine," Marissa huffed. "I'll just find some other couple to give the blankets I've been knitting to!"

"Wow," Freddie said as his mother stormed out of the kitchen.

"I know," Sam sighed.

"So," Freddie said. "I'm taking it we're still not telling her?"

"No," Sam smiled. "Let's just keep it to ourselves for now."

"Sounds good to me," Freddie said, wrapping his arms around Sam. "But you know she's going to have to know eventually."

"Yeah, I know," Sam said, putting a hand on her abdomen. "I was thinking in nine months."

"Sam, the baby will be a month old already then," Freddie laughed. "I _think _she'll notice you're pregnant a _bit _sooner."

"Not if we avoid her until the kid's born," Sam said. "And she'd be so excited to be a grandma that she wouldn't even remember to be mad at us for not telling her."

"Sam, trust me," Freddie said. "My mother can sniff this sort of thing out in a heartbeat. I'm just surprised she didn't figure it out know."

"We got lucky then," Sam shrugged. "Now come on, if we don't get back out there to the big charades game your mom's starting, we're going to have questions."


	192. Chapter 192

**AN-Sorry for the wait! Requests are sort of backed up right now. Feel free to keep sending them in, I love when you guys do, but just know it will be awhile before they're up. **

…**.**

_Foreigner _

"And see, I added this little scroll down menu here, so our viewers can see the videos sorted by date, not just subject," Freddie said, sitting on the Shay's couch with his laptop out.

"Yeah, that's really great," Carly said distractedly, pouring a large bag of chips into a bowl in the kitchen.

"You didn't hear I word I said, did you?" Freddie frowned.

"Nope," Carly replied.

"Well that was three hours of work wasted," Freddie sighed, getting to his feet and walking into the kitchen. "Oh hey, those are the chips with the ridges! My mom never buys those because she thinks I'll cut my tongue."

"Don't touch them!" Carly said as Freddie reached into the bowl. "I told you, Sam and I are having our last sleepover before I leave for University of Washington and she goes to New York! So paws off our junk food!"

"You know, I'm leaving too," Freddie pointed out. "I'm leaving for Cal Tech. in a month, so I don't see why I'm being excluded from this whole thing."

"Freddie, you know the three of us are going to do a big going away thing together," Carly told him. "But you know how close me and Sam are…it's a girl thing."

"Yeah, I know," Freddie said.

"Hey, hey," Sam said, letting herself into the Shay's apartment, carrying a large pizza box. "I've got the pizza."

"Good, put it on the coffee table and I'll start the movie," Carly said.

"Why's this one still here?" Sam asked, nodding over to Freddie. "You said he wasn't going to be here."

"I was working on iCarly, for your information," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"And there's no Internet access across the hall? Or did you just want to enjoy precious Carly's company?"

"Sam, play nice," Carly told her best friend.

"Whatever, I'll see you guys tomorrow when we film that last episode of Super Bra," Freddie said. "I guess I'll go spend the night hanging out with Gibby. Hopefully he won't try and make me watch that home movie of his birth again…"

…

Carly and Sam enjoyed a night of basic girl's night activities. They painted their nails (or rather, Carly painted her nails while Sam drew faces on all her toes), pigged out on junk food, and watched re-runs of old television sitcoms.

"Hey," Carly yawned as Sam piled a spoonful of peanut butter on a piece of chocolate. "Let's play truth or dare before I fall asleep."

"Are you kidding me?" Sam frowned, stuffing her chocolate in her mouth. "What are we, seventh grade girls?"

"It'll be fun," Carly pleaded.

"So would going down to that lady with the mustache's place on the third floor and egging her door, but you won't let _that _happen."

"Sam, she almost called the cops on you last time," Carly sighed. "Come on, just play with me."

"Fine," Sam moaned.

"Yay," Carly smiled, settling herself down on the couch next to Sam. "Truth or dare?"

"Well, since I'm not getting up from this couch, truth," Sam said.

"Okay," Carly said thoughtfully. "Um…I got it! Out of all the guys you dated in high school, which one do you regret the most?"

"Gee, out of all three of them?" Sam asked, rolling her eyes.

"Hey, I only had a few boyfriends too," Carly pointed out.

"Yeah, but you had plenty of dates," Sam reminded her.

"Oh just answer the question," Carly said.

"Fine," Sam sighed. "Probably Jonah…Even though he was _junior _high, not high school."

"Ick, he _was_ a loser," Carly nodded. "Hey, if it makes you feel any better, I heard that every college he applied to rejected him, so he started working at some sewage company right after graduation."

"Ha, that does make me feel better," Sam smiled.

"But hey, what about Pete?" Carly asked. "I thought you said you hated his guts after you found out that he broke up with you to date that cheerleader."

"Eh, he was good looking though," Sam shrugged. "I don't know _what _I was thinking, believing Jonah was even remotely attractive. Besides, at least Pete didn't try and kiss my best friend while we were dating."

"Yeah, I guess Jonah _was_ even worse than Pete," Carly nodded. "And, um, what-what about Freddie?"

"What about him?" Sam frowned.

"Well where does he rank?"

"No, no, no, nice try, Shay," Sam said. "One question. That's how the game goes. I already answered two for you, so it's your turn. Truth or dare?"

"Truth," Carly said quickly.

"Where did you hide Spencer's fancy bacon from Peru?"

"In the fridge, underneath all the vegetables," Carly said at once. "Now back to what I asked you before-"

"I choose dare this time, Carly," Sam said, heading over to the fridge.

Carly pouted, but then she grinned. "Okay, I _dare _you to answer the question I asked you before."

Sam narrowed her eyes. "Are you kidding me, Shay?"

"Sam, come on, this is going to be our last sleepover until Christmas, when you come back from New York," Carly said.

"Fine," Sam moaned. "Fine, but don't you even _think _of telling anybody else this."

"I'm your best friend, Sam, of course I won't," Carly said.

"He was the best out of all of them," Sam mumbled. "But like I said, there was only three of them, and going up against Jonah and Pete isn't exactly tough. _He _didn't try to make me girly or talk about himself non-stop. And unlike Pete or Jonah, he actually paid when we went out, and he used to slip little notes into my locker, and he's always tell me I looked nice, and he was _so _much more attractive than the other two were."

"What was that last one?" Carly asked, raising an eyebrow.

"N-Nothing," Sam said quickly.

"It sounded like he was a pretty great boyfriend to you," Carly said.

"Yeah," Sam said softly. "He was."

"Well then why did you break up with him?"

"Hmm?"

"We never really talked about that," Carly said. "After you told me you broke up with him that night I finally convinced Spencer and Jenna their relationship was weird, you never really brought the whole thing up again. I just don't know why, after you said all of that, you would want to break up with him."

Sam sighed. "I didn't exactly break up with him."

"What?" Carly frowned.

"I didn't break up with him…completely," Sam said. "It was more mutual."

"Oh," Carly said, surprised.

"We were talking in the elevator," Sam explained. "And we just sort of decided that maybe we were too different for each other. So we decided to break up."

Carly saw Sam's glance drop to the floor. Carly knew that this was probably hard for Sam to talk about. After all, in the field of feelings, Sam was practically a foreigner.

"But Freddie always said that it was you who broke up with him," Carly pointed out.

"I know," Sam shrugged. "I guess he decided to just go along with my story."

"Wow," Carly whispered. She looked at her best friend. "Sam?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you still love him?"

Sam looked back up, and then, after a moment, slowly nodded. "Yeah," she said softly.

"Well then why don't you tell him that?" Carly asked.

"Because," Sam said sharply. "It wouldn't make a difference."

"It might-"

"No, it wouldn't," Sam said firmly. "Carly, he's leaving for California next month, and I'm going to New York."

"Long distance relationships could work."

"Carly, that's not even the problem," Sam said. "The problem was I wasn't normal enough for him, okay? I probably never will be. So it's best for everyone if we just leave this whole thing alone. I can go off to that dance academy in New York and Freddie can go to Cal Tech, and-and find some normal girl." At that last part, Sam turned her head away from Carly, but Carly knew that Sam eyes were threatening to betray her with tears.

"But what if Freddie's still in love with you too?" Carly asked.

"He's not," Sam said. "Come on, Carly, can we just drop this?"

Carly opened her mouth to argue, but she closed it at the last moment. "Okay."

"Good," Sam said. "And remember, you promised to never tell anyone about this."

Carly glanced over at her front door, trying not to think that the one person who so desperately _needed _to be told about this was just a short trip across the hall…

"Carly?" Sam said.

"Yeah, I remember," Carly sighed. "I promise."


	193. Chapter 193

_Feel_

"So if a tomato is a fruit," Spencer said, holding a tomato up and examining it. "Then what exactly is a cucumber?"

"What?" Sam frowned.

"A cucumber's a vegetable," Freddie said.

"That's what everyone said about the tomato though," Spencer said. "But then they decided that since it has seeds, it's a fruit. But then what does that make red pepper? If a red pepper is a fruit, that just totally throws the theory of fruit being sweet out the window. But then again, so would the lemon…Ah! Why do fruits have to be so complicated?"

"See, this here is the reason you need a real job," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

The front door of the apartment suddenly slammed open and Carly, carrying a large, heavy box, staggered in.

"What's in the box?" Freddie asked as Carly, panting, wiped the streams of sweat from her face.

"Oh nothing, just the five tons of iCarly props we ordered last week that were delivered today," Carly snapped. "Why didn't any of you come down to help me when I called your phones?"

"Because we were too busy listening to Spencer going through a fruit crisis," Sam replied.

"Carly, wouldn't you say the cucumber's a fruit if a tomato is one?" Spencer asked.

"I don't care," Carly said. "I just lugged this box up eight flights of stairs and know I'm all sweaty and gross."

"Why didn't you take the elevator?" Freddie asked.

"Because Lewbert was working on the elevator down in the lobby," Carly explained. "Now will you guys please help me get this box into our elevator so we can unload it in the studio?"

"I don't lift heavy things," Sam said. "Unless it's a thirty pound ham."

"I'll help you," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "While Sam sits there and fantasizes about food." Freddie headed over and tried to pick up the box, but even with his recently acquired muscles, he still had difficulty.

"Spencer! A little help here!" he gasped.

"Squash has seeds too, doesn't it?" Spencer frowned. "But that can't be a fruit, I mean, you can't have squash smoothies…Or can you?"

"Oh for the love of chiz," Sam said, getting up and grabbing the box easily from Freddie. "I could've gotten that," Freddie mumbled.

"Yeah, sure you could've," Sam said. "Dude, you'd think those soy protein shake things your mom makes you drink would've at least given you a _little _physical strength."

"Hey, it's taking you longer to beat me at arm wrestling now," Freddie pointed out. "Almost four seconds!"

"Guys come on, let's just get up to the studio and unload all this stuff," Carly said. "We can discuss Freddie's lack of physical strength later."

Freddie indignantly pressed the button for the elevator.

"Hey, wait, where are you going?" Spencer asked, snapping out of his daze.

"To the studio," Carly replied as the teens stepped into the elevator.

"Well don't leave me alone!" Spencer exclaimed, rushing in with them. "I still think that spider's hiding by the computer!"

"Honestly, are both you _men _total whimps?" Sam said, shaking her head as the elevator doors slid shut. She glanced over at Freddie. "Of course I use the word men loosely."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Freddie exclaimed.

"It means that-" Sam started, but she was interrupted as the elevator gave a mighty shake, and stopped moving.

"Um, what just happened?" Carly frowned.

"I think the elevator broke," Spencer said.

"Aw man, Lewbert must've done something to the wiring while he was fixing the elevator downstairs," Carly groaned.

"So we're stuck in here?" Sam asked.

"Looks like it," Freddie said. "And unfortunately, from the blueprints I studied of the building a few years ago, I think that the wirings pretty complicated, and can take-"

"I am _not _going to be stuck in here listening to _this_," Sam said firmly.

"We're not going to be stuck in here," Carly said, pulling out her pearphone. "We're going to call for help and-Hey! Where the heck is my signal?"

"Yeah, I don't get signal either," Spencer said. "Crab…I should've stayed downstairs and faced the spider!"

"Well how long are we going to be in here?" Sam asked.

"Until someone realizes we're stuck in here," Freddie sighed, leaning against the steal walls.

"Man," Sam moaned, sitting down.

"Could this stupid elevator be any more cramped?" Carly mumbled, looking around the elevator. "This is the worst place we could possibly be trapped."

"Tell me about it," Sam and Freddie muttered simultaneously.

Carly and Spencer exchanged glances.

"Wait, why's it so bad for you two?" Spencer asked.

"Yeah, neither of you two have a fear of tiny cramped spaces," Carly said. "Oh my God, I swear these walls feel like they're closing in on us!"

Sam and Freddie allowed themselves to glance at each other for the shortest second. But that second was all it took for them to understand why exactly this elevator was so uncomfortable for them, and it had nothing to do with the tiny space they were in.

Spencer sat down next to his little sister and tried to calm her down.

"Er, should we try to do something?" Freddie whispered to Sam as he watched Spencer and Carly.

"Nah, Spence's got this," Sam mumbled, not looking at him. "She's calming down."

"Oh, yeah," Freddie nodded. "It looks like she is…"

"Yup."

They glanced over at Carly and Spencer again.

"You know," Freddie whispered after a moment. "Its been a year."

Sam didn't have to ask what he meant. "I know."

The two were silent for a moment. The only sound in the elevator was Carly's moans about how much she hated the elevator.

"I still mean it," Freddie said, catching Sam off guard.

Sam blinked and stared over at Freddie, who was wearing a small smile. "I really do."

The corners of Sam's mouth curled up. "So do I."


	194. Chapter 194

**AN-Hi. So, I **_**am **_**still writing requests. The last two were requests, I promise. They were sort of broad requests, so I'm sorry if they didn't turn out the way the requester wanted. I don't mind broad requests at all; for those I just write about whatever idea pops into my head. If you'd like something specific, just ask, and I'll do it. Anyway, please feel free to send in more requests, but like I said, it will be awhile before they're up. Hope you enjoy!**

**This takes place duing iQuit iCarly.**

…**..**

_Script_

"And it's not like she even offered to _help _me get the paint off the windows after that incident with the roller skates," Carly fumed. "It was _her _idea that made the whole mess!"

"Uh-huh," Freddie said reflexively, absentmindedly polishing his camera lens as Carly paced angrily back and forth in the iCarly studio.

"Are you even listening to me?" Carly frowned, planting her hands on her hips.

"Um, well…" Freddie stuttered. Truthfully, he had tuned out Carly's rant about Sam shortly after it begun. It was surprising, sort of, but listening to Carly go on and on about Sam like that wasn't as satisfying as he would've thought. In fact, it was getting to be sort of…annoying. And unfair, really, when he considered what Carly was saying. Sure, Sam was irresponsible, lazy, prone to causing destruction with very little materials, but still.

Wait, was he defending Sam Puckett? Even in his head, that idea seemed bizarre.

"Oh, and you remember the time I gave her twenty dollars to go and buy more ice for one of our skits, and she came back with a gerbil?" Carly continued. "A gerbil!"

"I thought you liked that gerbil though," Freddie pointed out.

"That's not the point!" Carly snapped. "The point is that Sam was totally irresponsible, and because of that little stunt, we had to postpone the blizzard bit!"

"Yeah, but we ended up script about Gordy the Gerbil, and that was a huge hit," Freddie reminded her.

"Freddie!" Carly exclaimed. "Will you just let me rant on?"

"Carly, come on, Sam's your best friend," Freddie said.

"Was," Carly said firmly.

"You can't seriously stop being friends with her over this little fluke between Fleck and Dave," Freddie said. "That's crazy! It wasn't even your fight!"

"Well it might as well have been," Carly replied. "All those things Dave said about Fleck totally apply to Sam."

"Well what about all those things Fleck said about Dave," Freddie asked carefully. "That Sam thought applied to _you_?"

"What about them?" Carly frowned. "They were stupid things! Everyone knows you need to have someone to plan everything out."

Freddie sighed. He could see he wasn't going to get anywhere with Carly.

"I think I'm going to head home," Freddie said, getting to his feet.

"But I thought we were going to work on our history paper," Carly said.

"How about I come by tomorrow morning," Freddie said, picking up his laptop from his cart. "We can work on it then."

"Oh…okay, I guess we can do that," Carly shrugged. "I'll see you then."

Freddie took the elevator down from the studio and headed out of the apartment. But he didn't head across the hall back to his own home. He had no intention of doing so. He had simply wanted a break from listening Carly go on and on about Sam. He somehow found himself walking down to the lobby and across the street to the Groovy Smoothie.

"Hey, Freddie Benson!" T-Bo said loudly as he entered, approaching him. "Come to buy some tangelos?" He held up a stick of tangelos.

"Um, no thanks," Freddie frowned.

"Well fine then," T-Bo snapped. "I only spent the past eight months growing these in a field across town with my Produce Club."

Freddie shook his head as he stormed off. He was about to head over to the counter when he caught sight of a familiar blonde-headed demon sitting at a nearby table.

"Hey," Freddie said, sitting down in the empty chair next to her.

"What do you want, Fredlog?" Sam asked, looking up from her laptop.

"I thought you'd be working with Fleck on his video," Freddie said.

"No, I'm not seeing him again until tomorrow," Sam replied, taking a sip of her smoothie. "He's trying to talk to his cousin about editing it for us."

"Um, why don't you just ask me to do it?" Freddie frowned.

Sam scoffed. "Didn't you already promise _Carly _you'd edit hers and Dave's?"

"Well, yes," Freddie nodded. "But I can edit more than one three-minute video, you know?"

"Carly would probably get mad at you for helping us," Sam said. "And we all know that's the last thing you would want."

"I already told you and Carly a thousand times, I'm not taking sides in this fight between you two," Freddie said.

Sam laughed, and rolled her eyes. "Please. Like you haven't had a side since day one. Obviously you're going to do whatever you can to make sure that you stay on Carly's good side so that one day she might fall madly in love with you and make your nerdy little dreams come true."

"First of all," Freddie said. "You just made me sound absolutely pathetic."

"That was the point," Sam said.

"And second," Freddie continued, ignoring Sam's comment. "If I _were_ to pick a side, which I'm not, who said it would be Carly's?"

Sam blinked. "What?"

"Who said I'd be so quick to go to Carly's side?" Freddie repeated.

"Oh, right," Sam said. "Like you'd side with me."

"Well, it's not like I think Carly's completely right in this whole fight," Freddie said. "I mean, while I'm not saying your ideas for iCarly aren't hazardous and illegal, they're pretty funny. And there have been some that Carly's gotten rid of that actually weren't that bad."

Sam said nothing.

"Look, like I said, I'm not going to take sides," Freddie said. "I still think you and Carly should make up and-"

"That's not happening," Sam said at once.

"Carly said that same thing ten minutes ago when I was with her," Freddie moaned. "You're both being crazy."

Sam flicked his head.

"Ow!"

"You deserved that," Sam said. Then she lowered her voice. "So…when you were at Carly's…did she say anything about me?"

"N-No," Freddie lied quickly. "We, um, did homework."

"You're a sucky liar," Sam said softly.

"Okay," Freddie conceded. "Yeah, she was still ranting about you."

Sam nodded and looked down at her smoothie. "I figured."

Freddie noticed for the first time just how sad those big, blue eyes could look.

"Hey," he said. "You know she doesn't mean anything she's saying. She's just mad. Deep down she's still your best friend."

"What's she saying?" Sam mumbled.

"That you're irresponsible and a bunch of other chiz that's absolutely not true," Freddie said earnestly. "So don't let it get to you, Sam."

Sam chuckled. "So you're saying I _am _responsible?"

"Well, maybe not totally responsible," Freddie grinned. "But you always come around in the end."

Sam laughed. "Thanks. I guess, nub."

The two were silent for a moment.

"Look," Freddie said. "Why don't I edit the video for you and Fleck?"

"I guess you _do _have more experience than Fleck's cousin," Sam said thoughtfully. "And it's not like you have anything better to do…So sure, why not."

"Great," Freddie smiled. "I'll stop by your place tonight."


	195. Chapter 195

**AN-Hey, I already said this in my other fic, if you read it, but I'm posting it again. My football team (University of Florida Gators) are playing Miranda Cosgrove's football team this Saturday, Oct. 20****th****! How awesome is that? Sorry, and now onto the story…Oh, and did I really forget a request? I didn't think I did, but it's possible that that happened. If I did, I'm really sorry and just let me know and I'll put it up right away. **

**And this oneshot involves Epic Meal Time, which basically makes all these cool, high cal meals. I was unfamiliar with it before I got this request, so I'm sorry if there's any inaccuracies here. I tried my best!**

…**.**

_Span_

Freddie Benson walked downstairs, yawning. He had just woken up and had been surprised to find that his wife, Sam, had apparently gotten up before him, which had happened only once before in their ten years of marriage, and that circumstance had involved watching a 7 AM premiere of the latest Boogie Bear movie.

"Sam?" Freddie called, looking around the empty living room.

"What?" Sam answered back from the kitchen.

"What are you doing up?" Freddie yawned, heading into the kitchen. "It's not even eight o'clock yet."

"It's Thanksgiving, remember?" Sam said, rummaging through the refrigerator. "And we're stuck cooking this year…again."

"Yeah, I know that," Freddie nodded. "But you've never gotten up this early to cook before for Thanksgiving. I mean, the turkey's been defrosting in the fridge, so it should only take about five hours to cook, and since we're not eating until four, you don't need to worry about that right now."

"We're not going to have boring old turkey this year, Fredwad," Sam said, grinning as she pulled out a large bag from the refrigerator.

Freddie frowned. "Um, what do you mean?"

"It was going to be a surprise," Sam said, setting the bag down on the counter and walking over to her open laptop at the table. "But I'll show you…Last week I was surfing the web and I came across the most amazing video in existence."

"I thought you said the video with the monkey flossing the cat's teeth was the most amazing video," Freddie said as Sam pulled up a web page.

"It just moved down to number two," Sam said. "This video's even better. Look at it!"

"What the heck is TurBacon?" Freddie frowned, looking at the screen.

"The most delectable, meatiest creation to ever be created," Sam said. "You know how people make Turduckens? You know, put a chicken inside of a duck inside of a turkey?"

"Sure," Freddie nodded.

"Well these genius people," Sam said, nodding at the video. "Do that, plus stuff it with quail and Cornish game hen. And _then_, they wrap the whole thing in bacon, stuff it in a _pig_, wrap the pig in bacon, and then cook it."

"You're kidding," Freddie cringed. "That's like, six types of meat!"

"I know!" Sam said excitedly.

"And what exactly was wrong with just a plain old turkey?" Freddie asked, still staring at the screen with a look of disgust and amusement.

"Would you seriously rather have something so…bland, when you could be having the TurBacon?" Sam said, shaking her head.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Freddie said. "The video just showed that this is over _70,000_ calories! This has to be the most unhealthiest thing in America, and that's saying something!"

"Calm down, it's only 70,000 calories if you eat the entire thing," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Let's see, we have ten adults coming over, including us. Not counting Tyler, since he can't eat solid food, we have eight kids, who will probably eat half of what the adults eat. Well, Emma will probably eat close to full serving…But anyway, if you divide it up that way, it's _really _not any more than like, 3000 calories a serving."

"And _that's _not an insane amount?"

"Oh for the love of chiz, it's Thanksgiving, today's not the day to be counting calories, Fredward," Sam said. "Now here, take this hen and stuff it in the quail, will you. I'm going to check on Tyler."

"You realize this meal is probably going to cut everyone's life spans in half," Freddie said.

"If you don't stop bashing on my TurBacon, I'll end your life span right now," Sam said.

"Love you too, baby," Freddie said.

"Yeah, yeah," Sam laughed, giving her husband a quick kiss. "But seriously, start stuffing those birds!"

…

"A what?" Carly frowned.

"TurBacon," Sam said, as Carly set a bowl of potatoes on the counter.

"That sounds more unhealthy than all of the combos at Inside-Out Burger put together," Carly said. "You know, I'm _still _trying to loose my baby weight."

"You had Clarissa six years ago, Carls," Freddie pointed out.

"Yes, thank you, Freddie," Carly snapped.

"Hey, I think I've heard of that," Spencer said, placing his contribution, a plate of spaghetti tacos, on the counter. "Did you find it on that Epic Meal Time website?"

"Yes!" Sam said. "Isn't that website the best?"

"Um, yeah!" Spencer nodded. "I made this amazing lasagna from there with like, ten types of cheese!"

"And then he spent over an hour trying to fit into his pants the next morning," Spencer's wife, Ella, said.

"They shrunk in the wash, that had nothing to do with it!"

"So where is this TurBacon cooking?" Carly asked, looking around the kitchen. "It doesn't sound like it could fit in your oven."

"Nope, I'm making Gibby take it out of the smoker in the yard as we speak," Sam said. She turned to Freddie. "You know what? Leaving Gibby unattended out there probably isn't the best idea…Go help him. The last thing I need is him janking up my masterpiece."

"I'm on it," Freddie nodded.

"Okay, want to help me get the kids ready?" Sam asked Carly. "Everything else is ready to go."

"Sure," Carly agreed.

The two headed into the living room. Carly's daughter, Clarissa was sitting on the couch with Freddie and Sam's daughter, Ashton, playing with Gibby's toddler son, Huey.

"What are you girls doing?" Carly asked.

"We're playing house," Clarissa said.

"Aw, how cute," Carly grinned. "But why don't you girls go and wash up? Dinner's almost ready."

"Hey, where's Emma?" Sam asked, picking up her one-year old, Tyler, from his playpen.

"I'm right here!" Emma said. She had been going through one of the drawers of the T.V. stand. "I'm looking for tape."

"Why?" Sam asked.

"Because she wants to tape Quincy to the floor," Ashton explained.

"What?" Quincy, Gibby's oldest son, who had been sitting quietly, watching T.V. exclaimed. "I don't want to be taped!"

"You weren't supposed to tell him, Ashton!" Emma frowned.

"Nobody's taping anybody," Sam said, kneeling down to grab the tape from Emma's hand. But not before whispering in her ear, "If you have to do that, do it when your dad's watching you guys."

After rounding up all of the kids and getting them finally seated at the table, Freddie and Gibby came in from the yard, each carrying a side of a large tray where the massive TurBacon rested.

"Whoa, what is that?" Sam and Freddie's oldest child, Jason asked as the men set it down on the table.

"Turbacon," Sam said. "It's a turkey and chicken and duck and quail and hen all wrapped in bacon."

"Bacon?" Emma repeated her eyes widening. "I want some!"

"Relax, Em, you'll get some," Freddie laughed. He turned to Sam. "I swear, she's going to be eating more than you by the time she's ten."

"Can we just eat this thing already?" Gibby asked, taking his seat. "I swear, it was looking at me the whole time it was cooking. I just want it gone now."

"Okay, okay, keep your pants on," Sam said, grabbing a knife from the counter. "I'm cutting it!"

Once everyone had his of her plates, Sam took her seat next to Freddie.

"Well," Freddie said as he began cutting the slab of meat on his plate. "Let's see how six types of meat stuffed together tastes." He put his fork in his mouth.

"So?" Sam said, watching his expression.

"Oh my God," Freddie said, chewing. "This is the most amazing thing I've ever had!"

"Yeah, Sam," Carly nodded, tasting her own meat. "Even though I'll _never _get back into that purple dress I like now, I think I'll have seconds of this!"

"Come on, I don't think it's _that _bad for you," Spencer said, chewing. "Sure, it's bacon and turkey, and-Aw man, my pant button just popped! Dang washing machine, shrinking all my pants…"

"Yeah, it's the washer's fault," Sam grinned.

"Mommy?" Emma asked, holding up her now empty plate. "Am I allowed to have more?"

"You already finished?" Sam asked. "Wow Em, you eat faster than me."

"She stole my piece too," Quincy added.

"Well, at least we won't have to worry about leftovers," Freddie laughed, giving Quincy another piece of meat, and cutting a small second piece for Emma. "Between Sam and Emma, they'll have this TurBacon cleaned up in no time."

…..

"Well, I got everyone to bed," Sam said, dragging her feet into the kitchen later. "Man, I don't think I've been this full ever."

"Well, that TurBacon _was_ huge," Freddie said, loading the dishwasher.

"Yeah, I'm definitely making that again next Thanksgiving," Sam nodded. "Luckily, I saved myself the last bit of it so I can eat it tomorrow for lunch."

Freddie frowned. "Wait…that was _your_ leftover TurBacon in there?"

"Yes," Sam said, narrowing her eyes. "Why? What happened to it?"

"Um," Freddie mumbled. "I might have…eaten it."

"Freddie!" Sam exclaimed, hitting his shoulder.

"Sorry," Freddie said, massaging his shoulder. "But it's just because you cooked it _so _well."

"Oh don't try and flatter your way out of this, nub," Sam snapped. "And anyway, you were the one saying how terrible it was for you. What happened to all that?"

"Well, I guess after being married to you for ten years, your eating habits have finally rubbed off on me," Freddie grinned.

"So does that mean we can finally throw out all of those low-fat snacks that your mom keeps sending over?" Sam asked.

Freddie laughed and pulled her into an embrace. "Sure, it's not like anybody ever ate them."

"Good," Sam smiled, wrapping her arms around her husband's neck. "Now you'd better hope your lips still taste like that TurBacon…"


	196. Chapter 196

**AN-Hi, so I was wrong about Miranda going to University of South Carolina; she goes to the **_**other **_**USC, University of Southern California. **

**Oh, and "Guest", don't worry; I didn't forget your request, it's actually supposed to be next chapter. **

…**.**

_Caution_

"Are we there yet?"

"Sam," Carly sighed, looking up from her fashion magazine. "If we weren't there five seconds ago, what makes you think we're there now?"

"Ugh, how much longer?" Sam moaned.

"Not too long, if this GPS is right," Spencer said as he continued to drive the van that currently held himself, Carly, Freddie and Gibby down the highway.

"But we've been driving for hours," Sam complained. "I'm bored!"

"Come on, Sam, you can find a way to entertain yourself," Carly said.

"I _did _have a way to entertain myself," Sam muttered. "But _you _didn't like that."

"I wasn't going to sit in this car for eight hours while you and Freddie made out," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"We weren't going to make out the _whole_ time," Sam said. She looked over at her boyfriend, who was currently fast asleep, resting his head on the car window next to him.

"Hey, when we get to Mystic Mountain, I really have to pee," Gibby said, taking a sip of his lemonade that he had purchased at a service plaza.

"What? You just peed half-an-hour ago!" Spencer pointed out. "You know, when you made me pull over on the side of the road."

"I can't help it I have a small bladder," Gibby said.

"Just drive faster, Spence," Sam said. "I want to get some funnel cakes in my stomach."

"Hey, if you guys are bored, I have a way we can entertain ourselves," Gibby said. "If my bladder doesn't explode first."

"What?" Carly asked, closing her magazine.

"We help me think of names," he replied.

"Names for what?" Sam frowned.

"I was thinking of buying an iguana," Gibby explained. "But I need to have a really cool name first. So far I like Joe, Jonas, Joey, JoJo, Jossie,-"

"What about Joseph?" Carly suggested.

"Please, Carly," Gibby said, shaking his head. "That's just lame."

"Ugh, this is torture," Sam said. She turned to Freddie and poked him hard in the side.

"Ow! What's happening?" Freddie exclaimed, starting awake. "Sam? What'd you poke me for?"

"Because I'm bored," Sam replied simply.

"I told you, think of iguana names," Gibby said. "Hey, Freddie? What do you think of the name Johanna?"

"Dude, can it with the lizard names," Sam said, rolling her names.

"_Iguana_ names," Gibby corrected.

"Whatever," Sam snapped. She turned back to Freddie. "Entertain me."

"Hmm," Freddie grinned. "I think I can do that." He began to lean towards Sam.

"Hey! No smooching back there!" Spencer yelled, looking at the couple through the rearview mirror.

"Come on," Sam moaned.

"Guys, we'll be there soon," Carly said. "Once you're at Mystic Mountain, I promise, you can go off and be all coupley and ride the River of Romance ride and what not."

"River of Romance?" Sam repeated. "Unless that's a cleverly named twelve story roller costar, Mama's not getting on."

"Hey, look, there's the sign for Mystic Mountain!" Freddie said excitedly, pointing to a billboard. "Just two more miles!"

"Finally!" Sam exclaimed. "Funnel cakes, corn dogs and cotton candy here I come!"

…..

"So, the park closes as six," Spencer said as the five walked into the theme park. "So that gives us about eight hours before we need to start heading back to the car. What are we doing first?"

"Eating," Sam said at once, eyeing a food cart a few yards away.

"We just had breakfast a few hours ago in the car, though," Carly pointed out.

"And the problem is?" Sam asked.

"Hey, why don't me and Sam go find some food," Freddie suggested. "And we'll meet back up with you guys in a little while."

"You just want to make out," Carly smiled knowingly.

"Well we didn't get to in the car," Sam mumbled.

"Okay, okay, we'll meet up at the midway games in an hour," Spencer said. "Now come on, I want to ride the bumper cars!"

"Yes, I love bumper cars!" Gibby said. "But for some reason, whenever I go on them, everyone always seems to want to just crash into me…weird, right?"

"Yeah, you are," Sam said, grabbing Freddie's hand. "Come on, Fredbag, buy me some food."

She led Freddie over to the food cart, where mountains of fresh churros were waiting.

"You know, theme park food's supposed to be really bad for you," he said as he handed Sam her four churros. "It's filled with grease and chemicals and-"

"Hey, baby?" Sam said, taking a bite of one of the churros.

"Yeah?"

"Shut up."

"Okay, okay, should've seen that coming," Freddie laughed. "So, we have an hour to ourselves. What do you want to do? I bet there's no line for the River of Romance…"

"There's more of a chance of me puking on that ride than there is of me puking on the Deamonator," Sam scoffed. "Just follow me. I'll show you something cool."

"What?" Freddie frowned.

"Well, when I came here a few months ago with my cousin, Tanya," Sam explained. "We found this awesome hideout. It's right behind a set of restrooms."

"Why would we want to go there?" Freddie asked.

"Because," Sam said. "It's where they keep all the costumes that the workers dress up in. And last time I was here, that lame mouse guy totally cut me in line for ice cream, so now I'm going to pour ketchup into his costume's head."

"Sam, you can't do that," Freddie sighed. "It's not nice, plus if we get caught-"

Sam cut him off by pressing her lips to his. "You know," she whispered when she pulled away. "Maybe while we're in there, you and I can do a little more of that."

"Well…I guess if we make sure no one sees us go in there, we should be safe," Freddie said. "Alright, lead the way."

The couple made their way through the crowd of tourists towards a small, hut-like building behind a set of restrooms.

"Are you sureit's safe to go in there?" Freddie asked. "There's caution tape on the door."

"That's just so nobody goes in," Sam said, getting down on her knees so she could pick the lock. "Trust me, it's perfectly safe. It's just really dirty. Here we go."

The door, now unlocked, swung open, and the two quickly stepped inside.

"Wow, this place is actually sort of creepy," Freddie said, looking around at the many costumes. "I never did like seeing these character guys when I went to theme parks when I was little."

"Aw, was wittle Fweddikins scared?" Sam grinned.

"Ha, ha," Freddie said. "Now I believe I was promised some kissing if I came in here with you…"

"Hold your horses, Benson, I told you, I want to put ketchup in the mouse head first," Sam said, opening her bag and pulling out a large bottle of ketchup. "Maybe after this, that mouse will think twice before cutting me for a chocolate fudge sundae."

"Okay, well, hurry up," Freddie said, looking around uneasily at the costume heads that all seemed to be staring at him.

Sam walked over to where Milfred Mouse's head sat and opened up her bottle of ketchup and squeezed the contents in.

Freddie leaned against the door, watching her. Suddenly, though, he heard a thump coming from the other end of the room.

"Sam, did you hear that?" Freddie whispered.

"Hear what?" Sam asked.

"I think something moved back there!"

"Relax," Sam laughed. "There's nothing here besides a bunch of smelly, gross costumes." She put the empty bottle of ketchup back in her bag.

Freddie heard the sound again.

"You had to have heard that," Freddie hissed. "I'm serious, Sam. I don't think we're alone in here."

"Oh come on, how can you be scared?" Sam asked, rolling her eyes. "Maybe if it were the middle of the night, and this was an old abandoned shack in the woods, sure, it'd be a little scary, but it's ten o'clock in the morning in a theme park, Fredward! Besides, I'm sure you're just hearing things."

"I didn't say I was _scared_," Freddie mumbled.

"Aw, baby," Sam laughed. She leaned up and kissed him. "Better?"

"A little bit," Freddie smiled. He put his hands on her waist, but a second later, there was a loud crash.

"See, I _told _you there was something back there!" Freddie hissed. "Now let's get out of here!"

"Hold on, hold on," Sam said.

"What? No, let's go!" Freddie said.

"Who's there?" Sam called out, ignoring her boyfriend.

"Sam!"

"Shh!" Sam hushed him. "I said who's there?"

There was no answer.

"Something probably just fell," Sam shrugged. "Jeesh, way to be all jumpy, nub."

"Sorry," Freddie sighed. "I guess I just got a little freaked out. You know I'm not used to sneaking into places like this. Especially not places with creepy costumes of oversized mice."

"Well now that you realized that there's really _no one here_," Sam said. "Can we get back to where we were?"

"Definitely," Freddie grinned. He leaned down and was just about to kiss Sam, when she jumped back.

"Something just moved back there," she whispered, nodding over to the back of the large room.

"Who's jumpy now?" Freddie asked.

"I'm serious," Sam snapped. "Something just-"

"What's going on?" came a voice. "Who's there?"

And then, from behind the many boxes in a far off corner, the head of one of the costumes popped up.

"Whoa!" Freddie screamed, grabbing Sam's hand. "Come on, let's get out of here!"

Sam and Freddie quickly ran out of the room, slamming the door shut behind them.

"Do you think whoever it was in that costume head saw who we were?" Freddie asked once the couple was a safe distance away. "I mean non-employees aren't allowed back there, are they?"

"No," Sam said, catching her breath. "They kick you out of the park if they catch you there."

"What? You dragged us there knowing that?" Freddie exclaimed.

"Calm down," Sam said. "Look, whoever it was in that costume head probably didn't even get a good look at us. It was dark, remember?"

"Yeah, okay, I guess you're right," Freddie nodded. "Why don't we go catch up with the others now? They're probably waiting for us my the games."

"Alright," Sam agreed. "Come on."

The couple headed over to the midway games, where Carly, Spencer and Gibby were standing by the ring toss.

"I'm not leaving here until I win this thing," Spencer said as Sam and Freddie joined back up with the group. "I have 44 dollars invested in this game!"

"You wasted 44 bucks?" Sam frowned.

"He really wants that stuffed alien," Carly sighed. "So, what were you two up to?"

"Oh, nothing much," Freddie said quickly, glancing at Sam.

"Yeah, just hung out, ate a few churros," Sam said. "What did you guys do?"

"Gibby got us banned from the bumper cars," Carly said.

"Hey, America's a free country," Gibby defended. "Why should I have to wear a shirt when I ride bumper cars?"  
"Because there are young children who you've just scared for life," Carly said, shaking her head.

"Thank God we missed that," Sam said, shuddering. "Hey, why don't we head over to the Deamonator? That's the best ride here. There's probably a long line, so we should-"

"Hey, Spencer!"

The group turned around and saw a man wearing a Mystic Mountain employee shirt heading over.

"Doug!" Spencer exclaimed. "Hey, long time no see! Guys, this is Doug. He went to law school with me."

"Yup, I dropped out after two days, though," Doug sighed. "So I never got to become the fancy lawyer that Spencer here probably became."

Sam snorted.

"_Anyway_," Spencer said, shooting Sam a glare. "So you work here now? That must be fun."

"Yeah, it is, usually," Doug nodded. "But my break just got interrupted. I was taking a nap in the storage room where we keep all the costumes, and some freaks decided to break in and wake me up."

Sam and Freddie exchanged glances.

"Oh man, I _hate _when people disturb my naps," Spencer said.

"So do I," Doug said darkly. "I think it was some couple. Anyway, they're just lucky I didn't get a good look at them; I fell asleep with my costume head still on. If I had caught them, they would've been thrown out. Well, I need to get back to work. I'll catch up with you later, Spencer. You can buy me coffee sometime, since you made it through law school."

"Wow," Carly said to her brother. "There's actually someone out there who lasted a shorter amount of time at law school than you did."

"Hey, law school was hard!" Spencer defended, tossing the last ring in his hand, which bounced right off of the bottles he was aiming at. "Dang it! Wait here. I need to go get more money from the ATM."

"I'll come too," Gibby said. "I need to get some cash. I got my eye on one of those snazzy floral shirts from the souvenir stand."

"So," Carly said, crossing her arms as Gibby and Spencer walked away. "A couple sneaking into a forbidden costume storage room? Does that sound like the sort of thing a certain two people we know would do?"

"I don't know what you're talking about, Carls," Sam said.

"Yeah, we were no where near any costume storage," Freddie scoffed.

"Uh-huh," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "You know, you guys are the most unusual couple I've ever met."

"Yeah, well," Freddie shrugged, putting his arm around Sam. "We make it, work, don't we?"

…

**AN-So…who knows which T.V. show Mystic Mountain and Milfred Mouse and the Deamonator came from? Shout-outs for everyone who gets the right answer!**


	197. Chapter 197

**AN-Hey, so last chapter **_**was**_** a reference to Drake and Josh, one of my favorite shows! Love that so many of you caught that! Congratz to:**

**kyoshiama**

**cbb**

**plaidprincess3000**

**Nicolerose1999**

**QueenV101**

**Moviepal**

**xonessienichole**

**molly**

**onepiecex3**

**Oh! And Emenette574, since your request was a speculation of iBust a Thief, it would've looked really weird doing it after it aired, so I just made a separate oneshot for that called iBust a Thief Speculation, if you haven't seen it already.**

…**.**

_Chance_

"Well," Carly sighed, hanging up her cell phone. "That's three barber shops Spencer's no longer allowed back to."

"What happened at this one?" Sam asked, not looking up from the game she was playing on the Shay's game sphere.

"Let's just say that there was a bit of a…shampoo incident," Carly replied.

"Got it," Sam nodded. "Are you going to go get him?"

"In a few minutes, he has to go rinse himself off at the car wash next to the barber's," she replied. She picked up her pearpad. "Hey! Guess what?"

"What?" Sam asked, setting down her controller.

"We all just got invited to go to the grand opening of that new sushi place that's opening downtown," Carly said. "Since the owner's friends with Gibby's grandpa's sister-in-law."

"That _is _pretty cool," Sam agreed. "Although it would be cooler if it were the grand opening of a new burger joint."

"So should we go?" Carly asked. "It's this Friday night."

"I'm in," Sam said.

"Freddie?" Carly asked. "Freddie!"

"Hey, nub!" Sam said, throwing a pillow from the sofa over at her boyfriend.

"Huh? What?" Freddie asked, looking up from a magazine he had been reading.

"I _asked _whether you wanted to come with Sam and I to this new sushi place on Friday night," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "You in?"

"Oh, Friday night?" Freddie frowned. "Sorry. I can't; I'm busy."

"Busy?" Sam repeated. "Doing what?"

"Um, you know," Freddie said lamely. "My-My mom's making me go with her to an anti-tick seminar."

"Your mom's out of town at an anti-fungal convention," Sam said, crossing her arms. "And she's not getting back until Sunday."

"Oh…right," Freddie said weakly.

"What's going on?" Sam frowned. "Why can't you go to the sushi place?"

"Um, well," Freddie began sheepishly. "I, uh-"

"Oh boy," Carly sighed, getting to her feet. "I think I need some lemonade for this."

"Dude!" Sam said, narrowing her eyes at her boyfriend. "Why can't you go?"

"Because, I sort of, have plans," Freddie mumbled.

"What plans?"

"I don't have to tell you all my plans!" Freddie defended.

Sam raised an eyebrow menacingly. "What?"

"I mean-Ah! Look, you're just going to laugh at me if I tell you," Freddie sighed.

"Just tell me, maybe I won't laugh," Sam said. "I mean, knowing you, it's probably lame, and I _will _laugh, but you have a slight chance of that not happening."

"I already got a ticket for a…convention," Freddie told her reluctantly.

"A convention?" Sam repeated. "Oh, baby, this isn't another one of those _Galaxy Wars _conventions, is it? You _just _went to one two weeks ago!"

"Yeah, you bought Spencer that annoying robot Sky Naut that does _not _shut up," Carly said from the kitchen. "Thanks for that, by the way."

"It's not a _Galaxy Wars _convention," Freddie mumbled.

"Then what sort of convention-" Sam started.

"I think I heard my mom's whistle," Freddie said, rolling up his magazine and jumping up.

"Oh no, nice try, Fredbag," Sam said, jumping up at once and forcing Freddie back onto the couch. "You're going to tell me what sort of lame convention you're going to. And stop reading this lame magazine; you've been reading it all day."

"Sam, no, don't-" Freddie began, but Sam had grabbed his magazine from his hands before he could stop her.

"What the heck is this?" Sam frowned, unrolling the magazine. She looked at the cover and then burst out laughing. "Oh man, Carls, you have to see what the nub's reading!"

"What?" Carly asked, setting down her glass of lemonade and walking to Sam's side. "Hey, that's that anime stuff, isn't it?"

"You're going to a convention for this, aren't you?" Sam grinned. "Oh my God, I actually think _Galaxy Wars _might be cooler than this."

"Hey, this is cool chiz," Freddie defended as he grabbed his magazine back.

"When did you even get into anime?" Carly asked.

"A couple weeks ago, some kids from the AV club brought in a few comics of them," Freddie said. "And well, I thought I'd…give it a chance."

"Baby, you do realize that twelve-year olds read this stuff," Sam said.

"That's not true, plenty of adults do!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Not even _Spencer _reads this stuff anymore," Carly told Freddie.

"Carly!" Freddie frowned.

"Sorry, I'll go back and drink my lemonade," Carly conceded.

"Wow, just when I thought I couldn't get any bigger of a nubbish boyfriend," Sam said, shaking her head.

"It's not nubbish!" Freddie said.

"Okay," Sam said, laughing. "Whatever you say…nub."

…..

"Hey, Sam," Freddie said, walking into the Shay's apartment. "Do you want to go grab some smoothies, since I can't go to the sushi place tonight. I just wanted to do something together and-What were you just looking at?"

"Nothing," Sam said quickly, stuffing something in between the sofa cushions. "So smoothies? Yeah, I could go for one of those. Let's go. Now."

"Okay," Freddie nodded as Sam got to her feet. "Just grab your jacket and we can-" but the second Sam moved away from the sofa, he made a dive for the magazine Sam had just hid.

"Hey!" Sam cried, running over and tackling Freddie to the ground, grabbing the magazine out of his hand. But not before he managed to get a look at the cover.

"Well, well, well," he said, grinning, as he picked himself up. "That wouldn't have happened to be one of my anime magazines, would it? One of the ones you said were lame and 'for twelve-year olds'?"

"No," Sam mumbled.

"Sam…"

"Okay, it was," Sam snapped. "I was just going through it to…laugh at it. Because it's _so _stupid."

"Really?" Freddie said knowingly. "It wouldn't be because, maybe, you like it? I saw how intently you were reading when I first came in, before you tried to hide it. Admit it; you like this stuff."

"No!" Sam said firmly.

"Come on," Freddie laughed, pulling her closer to him. "Admit it. You know you want to…."

"Okay, fine!" Sam groaned. "Maybe…maybe it's not as bad as I thought it was. You happy?"

"Overjoyed," he nodded. "How awesome is this? My girlfriend's into anime like me!"

"You keep saying that, and you won't have a girlfriend," Sam said warningly.

"Got it," Freddie said. "But hey, if you like this stuff, why don't you come to the convention with me?"

"Are you serious?" Sam frowned.

"Yeah, come on, it will be fun," Freddie urged her.

Sam pondered this. "Those conventions _do _usually have good food…But do I have to dress up?"

"No, you don't have to," Freddie promised her.

"Okay," Sam sighed. "I'll…go to the convention with you. But we tell _no one _about this, understand?"

"I understand, baby," Freddie grinned. "It will be our little secret."


	198. Chapter 198

_Tack_

"Yes, Granddad," Carly said, unlocking the front door of her and Spencer's apartment. "I took Spencer to his doctor's appointment, but they still don't know where that-Ah!"

As Carly opened the door, she was greeted by the sight of Sam and Freddie taking part in a very intense make-out session.

"Um, everything is fine, Granddad," Carly said as Sam and Freddie pulled apart and turned to look at her. "Just, um, stepped on a piece of Spencer's tack sculpture. I'm going to go nurse my foot now, bye! Okay, you two," she said as she hung up her pearphone. "How many times have I told you, if you _must _make out here, can you at least give me _some _warning so I don't have to walk in on it? A text, a call, anything!"

"We locked the door," Sam pointed out.

"Oh, well _sorry _for not taking the hint that since my own front door was locked, I shouldn't use my key to go in like I always do!"

"We're sorry," Freddie sighed. "We'll try to remember to text you or something next time."

"Thank you," Carly said, taking off her jacket. "It's not that I don't think you guys are a great couple; I really do. No one was happier when you got back together than I was. It's just that it's a little weird for me to walk in and-Are you guys making out again?!"

"We figured you walking in the first time was your warning," Sam said, pulling away from her boyfriend yet again.

"You two just can't keep your hands off each other for more than a few minutes, can you?" Carly asked, rolling her eyes.

"Hey, we have over a year to make up for," Freddie said.

"Well, I have my own date coming over here in a few minutes," Carly said.

"Who?" Sam asked.

"Troy Richards," she replied. "And I have to warm up all this frozen food I bought at the store and pretend that I made it, so you two need find a new place to make out for a few hours."

"Can't we just go up to the studio?" Freddie asked.

"No, the door is still glued shut, thanks to Gibby," Carly said. "Why don't you two just go across the hall to your place, Freddie?"

Sam and Freddie both let out a laugh.

"Yeah, right, Carls," Sam snorted. "Because Mrs. Benson is just so welcoming. Besides, she doesn't even know Freddie and I are back together."

"What?" Carly frowned. "You guys, its been almost a month!"

"What's your point?" Freddie asked. "Look, my mom tried very hard to break Sam and me up last time. Clearly she's not crazy about us dating. I just think it's best if we wait awhile before telling her."

"Ugh, why's your mom have to be so crazy, Freddie?" Carly said.

"What about Freddie's crazy mom?" Spencer asked, walking through the front door. "I just passed her on the stairs. She was saying she was heading to some important lice convention."

"Wait, she left?" Freddie said.

"As in there's an empty apartment across the hall?" Sam said.

"Yeah, I guess," Spencer nodded. "Anyway, who wants to hear the funniest story about me at the shoe store? So I'm trying to buy these sneakers, but this nun won't let me-Hey, where are you going?"

But Sam and Freddie didn't even hear him as they ran out of the apartment, across the hall.

"I forgot all about my mom's lice convention!" Freddie said as he quickly pulled his key out of his pocket and unlocking his apartment door.

"How long will she be gone?" Sam asked as Freddie swung the door open.

"Those conventions go on for hours," Freddie said. "A bunch of crazy ladies debating the best way to kill head lice…she might not be back for days."

"Good," Sam said. "Then let's not waste time." She pressed her lips to his. He eagerly responded as he led her over to the couch.

The couple fell onto the sofa, still attached at the lips. Freddie pulled Sam closer to him and Sam wrapped her arms around his neck, deepening the kiss.

But suddenly, the front door of the Benson's apartment door swung open, and Marissa Benson walked in.

"I don't remember leaving the door unlocked," she said, turning on the light in the living room. "I wonder what-Oh! My sweet cheese!"

Sam and Freddie broke apart at once.

"M-Mom!" Freddie stammered as Marissa grasped a nearby coffee table for support. "What-what are you doing here? I thought you had a lice convention."

"I do," Marissa snapped. "But I forgot my travel sanitation kit for the train ride there." She motioned to a large bag that was sitting next to the couch.

"Probably should've noticed that," Sam mumbled.

"Now, what is the meaning of this?" Marissa said firmly. "What is my sweet baby boy doing kissing that-that-that-"

"She _has _a name mom," Freddie said. "And me and Sam were kissing because…we're back together again."

"What?" Marissa exclaimed. "Since when?"

"Since about a month ago," Freddie said hesitantly.

"A month?" Marissa yelled, her eyes bulging.

"Well, I think I should get going…" Sam said, getting to her feet.

"No, Sam, stay," Freddie said. He turned back to his mom. "Look, Sam and I are in love and-"

Marissa let out a gag and clutched her stomach.

"-And there's nothing you can do that will stop us from seeing each other," Freddie continued. "So you can either learn to accept that, or you'll just live with it anyway."

"I most certainly will _not _accept it," Marissa said, narrowing her eyes at Sam. "My son will not fraternize with a delinquent, grungy, unkempt-"

"Sam's not any of those things!" Freddie said, taking Sam's hand. "She's beautiful, kind...she's perfect."

"Really?" Sam smiled.

"Really," Freddie nodded.

"Oh please," Marissa said, rolling her eyes.

"Mom," Freddie sighed. "You should be very happy I'm dating Sam."

"And why would I be happy about it?" Marissa said, crossing her arms.

"Because," Freddie said. "You remember how I turned down my college acceptance to MIT earlier this month, and decided to go to Seattle Tech and earn a degree in their program? You remember how happy I was that I wasn't going to be moving across the country?"

"Yes," Marissa nodded. "But what does that have to do with anything?"

"Because I didn't decide to stay here because I didn't want to move so far away," Freddie said. "I did it so I could stay here _with Sam_."

Marissa blinked. "W-What?" She turned to Sam. "You got my Freddikins to stay here?"

"Um, yeah," Sam nodded. "I guess I did."

"You still think she's so bad?" Freddie asked, putting his arm around Sam.

Marissa pursed her lips. "…She can stay…for now. _But_, you two are going to carry out this relationship in a traditional manner. That means I want no more of the…activity I saw this evening."

"Um, okay," Freddie nodded.

"We won't let you catch us," Sam said.

"Sam!" Freddie hissed.

"Kidding," Sam said quickly.

"Well, Sam and I have to go to our…community service project now," Freddie said, grabbing Sam's hand to lead her out of the apartment. "So I guess I'll see you after your lice convention, mom."

"Okay, I'll work on preparing a puppet show to revisit a few questions you might've had from our Birds and the Bees talk last year," Marissa said.

"So," Sam said as her and Freddie closed the apartment door behind them. "By community service project, I hope you don't really mean community service project."

"Not unless there's some organization called make-out with my hot, blonde girlfriend," Freddie grinned.

"Cute," Sam laughed. "But hey, about what you said in there…I thought you said the reason you decided to go to Seattle Tech was because they offered you a scholarship. Was it really just so you could stay here with me?"

"Going to any college where I could only see you through a computer screen or a few times a year wouldn't be worth it for me," Freddie said, kissing her. "So yeah, you're the reason I stayed."

Sam smiled. "But you've always wanted to go to MIT; it's been your dream since you were like, nine."

"Yeah, well," Freddie said. "I have new dreams now."


	199. Chapter 199

**AN-Hey, so I know iPear Store aired awhile ago, but here's an aftermath of that episode! Enjoy!**

…**..**

_Winning _

Somehow, Sam knew Freddie would not have left the mall. He was bound to be sitting in his favorite spot…and sure enough, she spotted him sitting by the fountain in the middle of the mall. She sighed as she walked over to him.

"Hey," she said, sitting down across from him.

"What do you want _now_?" Freddie moaned.

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Okay, somebody's in a mood."

"Well, generally, after somebody's dream job is ripped from them they get into a bit of a mood, Sam," Freddie snapped.

"You're job was not _ripped _from you," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Yes, it was!" Freddie said. "And you were the one doing the ripping!"

"Me?" Sam said. "I didn't make you lose you job!"

"Oh really?" Freddie scoffed. "You completely ruined everything for me there, just like you always do! What do I have to do for you to just let me have something good in my life for a change, Sam? Huh? It's like your only goal in life is to make sure I'm miserable every second!"

"Hey, they _asked _me to work there, for your information," Sam defended. "What was I supposed to do? Say no, I don't want to make the money that I desperately need?"

"They only asked you because you're good at forcing people to buy things they don't need or want," Freddie said. "If they knew your lack of technological skills _or _your past job records, you wouldn't have gotten the job. But whatever, your little plan to take my job from me worked; you won."

"I won?" Sam repeated.

"Yeah, don't pretend you didn't take the job just to push me over the edge," Freddie said. "It worked. Your winning streak continues, okay."

"So you think," Sam said. "That I took a job at the Pear Store with you _just _so I could mess things up for you like I apparently always do."

"Well it's true," Freddie said. "What other possible reason would there be for you to take that job?"

"Well, maybe I wanted to-" Sam started.

"I know what you wanted to do, we've been through that," Freddie cut her off. He sighed. "Man, I can't believe you lost me my job…I was so _good_ at that job."

Sam let out a laugh. "Okay, Benson. We're going to set something straight right now. You _sucked _at that job."

Freddie frowned. "That's totally not-"

"It _is _true and you know it," Sam said firmly. "You were terrible with the customers, you couldn't sell anything to anybody to save your life, and you just couldn't get it through your thick skull that some people buy computers just because they look nice; not because of hard drives and all that other chiz."

"I-well-you-" Freddie started. "Well that's completely irrelevant! You still knew how important that job was for me, and you knew that you being there would do nothing to screw it up for me! If you cared about me just a _little bit _you would've never taken the job in the first place!"

Sam blinked. "Why do you keep saying that?" she asked softly.

"Saying what?" Freddie mumbled.

"That I don't care?"

Freddie frowned. "What?"

"I cared enough to quit," Sam said, getting to her feet.

"You-You quit?" Freddie stammered.

"Yeah," Sam nodded.

"I-Well that just proves it, doesn't it," Freddie said. "You don't want that job if I'm not there for you to torture!"

Sam shook her head. "You're half right. I didn't want the job if you weren't there…but did you ever think maybe I took the job just to…hang out with you? _Not _torture you."

Freddie blinked. "And why would you want to hang out with me at my job? We hang out all the time."

"No we don't," Sam said. "We do iCarly together. We do things with _Carly _together. The last time we hung out just the two of us was when, well…"

"When we were dating," Freddie finished softly. "Oh."

"Yeah," Sam said, looking at the ground. "But whatever. If you're so against that, I guess we'll just keep it only me, you and Carly." She turned to leave. "I'll see you at Carly's place then."

"Wait, Sam!" Freddie started, but Sam had already begun to walk away.


	200. Chapter 200

**AN-Not going to lie, I don't think this is my best oneshot, but it was the best I could come up with. I know the request for this was a big fight between Sam and Freddie, but when I made it really dramatic, if just wasn't in character, so I scaled it back a bit. I hope you like it!**

…**..**

_Lie_

"Come on, guys, it's not that bad," Carly said, rolling her eyes as she walked into her apartment, followed by Sam and Freddie.

"Um, yes it is," Freddie said. "How could I get stuck working with Sam for this English project? What did I do to make Mrs. Goldings hate me so much?"

"Like working with you is a dream come true for me," Sam snapped, heading to the fridge.

"She's not going to do any of the work," Freddie moaned, turning to Carly.

"Yes, she will," Carly said.

"Nah, I probably won't," Sam said, pouring herself a glass of chocolate milk.

"You see!" Freddie exclaimed.

"You know, I don't think I want to deal with this," Carly said, turning back towards the door. "I'm going to go meet Gibby to work on our own project. You two…just try not to kill each other."

"No promises," Sam said as Carly headed out of the apartment, shutting the door behind her.

"Look, can we just please get started on this project," Freddie said, pulling out his laptop. "The sooner we do, the sooner we can be done."

"Fine," Sam sighed, throwing herself down on the couch next to Freddie. "What do we have to do again?"

"You don't even remember the project?" Freddie said. "Great."

"Dude, Goldings said whatever it is isn't due for another three weeks," Sam said, grabbing the remote from the coffee table. "So chill out. Why bother working on it today?"

"Because it's a project that counts for over half our final grade," Freddie said. "We need to do good on it. If we screw it up, who knows how that will play out for our getting into college. Well, _my _getting into college at least."

Sam rose an eyebrow. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Oh come on, Sam," Freddie chuckled. "You didn't even apply anywhere."

"Because I didn't _want_ to," Sam pointed out. "If I wanted to, I could've got in somewhere."

"Okay, whatever you say," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Now, if you're not going to help me on this project, I'll just get started on my part, and then you can-ow! What was that for?" He rubbed the spot on his shoulder where Sam had just slugged him.

"For calling me stupid!" Sam snapped.

"Man, that's going to leave a bruise," Freddie muttered.

"Well you deserve it," Sam said, taking a swig of her chocolate milk. "Now just work on our project like a good little nub."

"You see, Sam, _this _is your problem," Freddie said. "You don't take anything seriously! This is a huge school project and you're not acting like it's not important at all! You do this with everything."

"Like what?" Sam retorted. "I don't like school work, big deal. Lots of people don't. I take other things seriously."

"Please," Freddie said, shutting his laptop and turning to the blonde. "What about….your job at the Pear Store!"

"What about that?" Sam frowned.

"Well, other than the fact that you took it just to ruin my life," Freddie said. "You couldn't even handle that!"

"Um, I got promoted over you, didn't I?" Sam pointed out.

"Yeah, only because there was something screwed up with Natalie's head that week," Freddie argued. "But once she came back to her senses and fired you-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Sam said, jumping to her feet. "Who says I got fired?"

"Well you don't work there anymore," Freddie said.

"Yeah, because I _quit_, " Sam said. "About twenty seconds after _you _got fired."

Freddie's eyes widened. "Oh…well, see! You didn't really want that job in the first place! You just took it to bug me!"

"That's not why-" Sam began, but Freddie cut her off again.

"And there's a ton of other things that you don't take serious," Freddie continued. "Like iCarly!"

"Hey, I always do what I'm supposed to do for iCarly!" Sam defended.

"No, you always leave everything for poor Carly to do," Freddie said. "Just last week, you were supposed to paint the background for the idiot farm girl bit, but you ran out of here the second you heard a Fat Cake truck broke down up the street and me and Carly had to spend that whole afternoon doing it!"

"Yeah, well," Sam snapped, her voice rising. "You probably loved that, didn't you. Having an excuse to work with Carly all by yourself!"

Freddie frowned, confused. "What do you-"

"You know, Freddie?" Sam continued. "Since you don't seem to have any problem telling me what's so wrong with me, how about _I _tell you everything that's wrong with _you_?"

"Wrong with me?" Freddie repeated.

"Yeah, you're not so perfect, you know," Sam said. "How about we start with how jerky you've been these last few months?"

"I have not been _jerky_," Freddie said.

"Yes you have," Sam said. "To me. Like all those cracks you _just_ made about me being stupid. And when we were working at the Pear Store, you kept ripping on me. And then the whole Carly thing-"

"_What _Carly thing?" Freddie asked.

"Never mind," Sam mumbled.

"No, what are you talking about?" Freddie asked.

"You keep flaunting around the fact that you're in love with her again, okay?" Sam exclaimed.

"In love with her?" Freddie repeated.

"Yes! All you do is take her side in everything!" Sam said loudly. "Oh, let me follow Carly around like a love-sick puppy again, Carly cares about me, poor Carly has to do all the work that terrible, stupid Sam leaves for her! I mean for crying out loud, she's my _best friend_! It hasn't even been that long!"

"What?" Freddie asked, hopelessly confused. "And what do you mean it hasn't been that long since-oh." A look of sudden understanding fell over his face. "It hasn't been that long…since we dated?"

Sam didn't say anything, she just looked at Freddie in silence.

"You-you really think I have a thing for Carly again?" Freddie asked softly, the anger that had previously been in his voice dissolving.

"You're making it pretty obvious," Sam mumbled. "You're overly nice to her, and to me you're, well, not as nice."

Freddie sighed. "Have I really been that bad?"

Sam shrugged. "For you, the tech loving guy who I've known for years, yeah. But I guess I really can't complain. I mean, look at how I've treated you."

The two were silent for a moment.

"I think I'm going to go home," Sam said after a while. She picked up her bag and walked towards the door.

"I'm sorry," Freddie said just as Sam was about to open the door.

"Dude," Sam sighed. "Just forget about it and-"

"No, Sam, listen," Freddie said, walking over to the door and standing in front of it so she couldn't leave. "First of all, I'm not in love with Carly."

Sam's expression softened. "You're not?"

"No," Freddie said earnestly. "I love Carly. But she's like my sister."

"You mean that?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "And," he let out a deep breath. "I guess, maybe the reason I've been acting so…jerky towards you is because, maybe…I've been trying to act me…abnormal…For you."

Sam frowned. "For me?"

"Yeah, you know," Freddie said, nervously looking at the ground. "When we were in the elevator…and we broke up. We said maybe we'd try it again if I got more _abnormal_. And, well, I figured the easiest way for me to do that was to act like you. But…I guess I over did it, didn't I?"

Sam showed a small smile. "You know…the reason I didn't totally kill you all that chiz you pulled was because I was trying to be more _normal_."

Freddie let out a laugh. "Kind of ironic, huh?"

"Yeah, I guess," Sam nodded.

Freddie took a step closer to her. "Well…I mean, I know I sort of failed at being abnormal-"

"-And I guess I didn't do too good of a job of being normal, either," Sam smiled.

"But even with all that," Freddie continued. "I-I didn't lie about the other thing I said that night. I still do love you."

Sam felt her heart skip a beat. "I still love you too," she smiled.

"Did we just get back together?" Freddie asked hesitantly.

Sam laughed. "Feels like it."


	201. Chapter 201

**AN-Hey, so this is a sequel to chapter 180, where Sam went out with a worker from the Groovy Smoothie after iBalls.**

…**.**

_Government_

"Wait, wait, wait," Carly said. "So while you were at the Groovy Smoothie, which you all totally ditched me to go to, by the way-"

"Sorry," Freddie mumbled.

"So while you were there," Carly continued. "One of the workers asked Sam out?"

"Yup," Freddie nodded.

"Oh my God, that's awesome!" Carly grinned. "It's about time Sam got a date; she totally deserves this."

"But the guy's a loser!" Freddie exclaimed, a little put off by Cary's reaction. "Just a few months ago he was hitting on her like crazy!"

"So? What's wrong with a guy hitting on her?" Carly shrugged.

"I was right there!" Freddie said.

"Yeah, so?" Carly said. "It's not like-Wait. Was this when you two were dating?"

"Yes!"

"Oh," Carly said. "Well, okay, that was kind of rude of him. But well…Freddie, you and Sam aren't dating anymore. Not to sound mean, but she can date any guy she wants."

"I-I know that!" Freddie stammered. "I don't care _who _she dates! Not at all! The point _is _she's dating a guy who's a total jerk to me! She's probably doing it just to bug me; she knows how much I don't like this guy."

"Well it's not like you're dating the guy," Carly pointed out. "Look, just try to get along with him for Sam. Maybe it won't work out between them and you won't have to deal with him anymore."

"Hopefully," Freddie muttered, throwing himself down on the couch, his arms crossed.

Carly frowned and sat down next to him. "Freddie," she said softly. "Is this really all about you not liking this one particular guy Sam's dating? Or is it about Sam dating guys _who aren't you_?"

"What? That's-That's crazy!" Freddie sputtered. "I told you, I don't care who she dates. If she wants to date this jerky guy, fine."

Carly gave him a small smile. "You sure you're okay?"

"Yes, I'm perfectly fine," Freddie said.

Just then the door to the Shay's apartment and Sam walked in.

"Hey," Carly greeted her friend. "So, I hear _you _had a very fun time at the Groovy Smoothie."

"Oh, yeah, I guess," Sam shrugged.

"So, did you have fun on your little date?" Freddie asked, rolling his eyes.

"Yes, as a matter of fact I did," Sam said. "Ben bought me a huge sundae from that new place across from the Groovy Smoothie."

"Did you load it with parmesan cheese?" Freddie scoffed.

"Ha, ha," Sam snapped. "As a matter of fact, Ben didn't say a word about the amount of toppings I got. Unlike _some _guys, he doesn't pick on his dates eating habits."

"Whatever," Freddie said, getting to his feet. "I've got to go."

"Oh yeah, your mom was down in the lobby looking for you," Sam said. "She was saying something about the new government regulations for tick control…Looks like _somebody_'s going to get a nice little tick bath tonight."

"Yeah, well…shut up," Freddie muttered, turning to head out of the apartment.

"Nice come back!" Sam called after him.

Carly waited until the door shut, and then she turned to Sam. "I know that face…your date sucked, didn't it?"

"Yeah," Sam sighed. "All the dude did was tell me about his lame job at the smoothie. I finally got rid of him by telling him I was getting surgery tomorrow and needed to go home and sleep."

"So I'm guessing no second date?" Carly said.

"No, I figured he'd be a bust," Sam said.

"Then why'd you go out with him?" Carly asked.

Sam shook her head. "Just because, I guess."

"Freddie said he used to hit on you," Carly went on.

"Oh, yeah, he did, once," Sam said. Then she smiled. "And then you know what the nub did? He dumped a smoothie on his head. Man…I still can't believe he did that."

Carly stared at Sam, who was still wearing a smile, thinking back to that memory.

"Well," Sam said, finding her way back to reality. "I'm hungry."

"You just had ice cream," Carly pointed out.

"And?"

"Never mind," Carly said as Sam headed towards the fridge. "Hey, Sam?"

"Yeah?"

"Is-Is there anything else you want to talk about? Maybe _someone_?"

Sam frowned. "No. Hey, did Spencer throw out the rest of that pizza? I can't find it in here!"

Carly sighed. She just _had _to get stuck with the two most difficult, uncommunitve friends in the world, didn't she?


	202. Chapter 202

**AN-Hey, so I've actually been going a bit out of order with requests. I've been trying to do the ones that would be kind of weird to put up after the show ends. AKA the ones where Sam and Freddie aren't together. But this is the last one like that, so I'll be going back to the original order next chapter. Hope everyone had a happy Thanksgiving!**

**Oh, and this is a sequel to chapter 192, where Sam lets it slip to Carly that she's still in love with Freddie.**

…**.**

_Nowhere_

Carly sat up on her bed and looked over the loveseat in her room where Sam was sleeping.

"Sam?" Carly whispered.

The blonde didn't stir.

Convinced that her best friend was truly fast asleep, Carly threw back her covers, slid on her slippers and tiptoed out of the room. She headed downstairs, where Spencer was sleeping on the couch.

"No, Mr. President, don't put the kitten there," Spencer mumbled, shifting slightly in his sleep.

Carly rolled her eyes as she opened the apartment door and walked across the hall. She knocked on Freddie's door.

"Carly?" Freddie frowned, opening the door. "It's three in the morning, what's up?"

"Your mom's working the graveyard shift tonight at the hospital, right?" Carly said.

"Yeah, or otherwise she would've been sounding out intruder alarm the second you knocked," Freddie said. "I'm just finishing up some packing."

"Okay," Carly said, walking into Freddie's apartment. "Well, I have something _very _important to tell you."

"What is it?" Freddie questioned.

"I can't tell you."

"Uh-huh," Freddie said, crossing his arms. "So you came over here to tell me you have to tell me something, but you can't tell me?"

"Yes, I promised I wouldn't tell you," Carly said. "But it's something you _need _to know."

"Carls, can't you just tell me?" Freddie asked. "Or at least tell me who it is that made you promise not to tell me?"

"I can't," Carly sighed.

"Right, well then," Freddie said. "I need to go finish packing up my clothes, since this conversation's going nowhere."

He turned to head back to his room.

"Okay, okay," Carly said. "I-I still can't tell you what this person said-"

"Then why-"

"But," Carly continued. "I can, maybe, give you some hints to help you get there on your own."

"You're really not just going to tell me?" Freddie sighed.

Carly shook her head.

"Alright," Freddie conceded.

"Okay," Carly said. "Well, it shouldn't be too hard for you to figure out _who _the person is that told me not to tell you. She's one your ex-girlfriends."

"Which one?" Freddie frowned.

"Which one?" Carly repeated. "Freddie, you've had _two_ girlfriends!"

"Three!" Freddie defended.

"For the last time," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "That girl who thought you were online date at the Groovy Smoothie does not count."

"Fine," Freddie mumbled. "So it's either Valerie-"

"Come on, Freddie, use your brain that got you into Cal Tech," Carly said. "Why would I be talking to Valerie? She's a skunkbag."

"-or Sam?" Freddie finished.

"I will neither confirm or deny that," Carly said.

"Then why are you-"

"I will neither _CONFIRM_ or deny that," Carly repeated, putting emphasis on the word 'confirm'.

"So it _is _Sam?" Freddie asked.

"I will neither-"

"Okay, I get it," Freddie said quickly. "It is Sam. But what did Sam tell you that she wouldn't want me to know? Wait, is she planning some big prank before I leave? Do I need to start checking my underwear for explosives again?"

"No, Freddie, it's nothing like that," Carly said. "I'm sure your underwear is fine. Look, the thing Sam may or may not have told me…it involves your past...activities."

"Our past activities," Freddie frowned. "Look, Carly I'm really not good at piecing these things together."

"Ugh, _how _did you get into any college with this dense head of yours!" Carly exclaimed, throwing her arms up in frustration. "Past activities! What's the biggest _activity _in your and Sam's whole relationship?"

"I don't know," Freddie said. "I guess…I guess probably that month we were, you know, dating."

"Thank you," Carly said, relieved.

"Well I'm still confused," Freddie said. "What wouldn't Sam want me to know that involves us dating?"

Carly took a deep breath and sat down. "Freddie, can I ask you a question?"

"Um, I guess," Freddie said.

"When you and Sam broke up," she said. "Did you break up because you truly did not want to date each other anymore?"

Freddie sat down in the armchair across from Carly. "Carly, why are you asking this?"

"Just answer," Carly replied.

Freddie sighed. "I guess…no. That's not why we broke up."

"I know, it's because you thought you were too different for each other, wasn't it?" Carly said.

Freddie frowned. "How'd you know-"

"It might've come up in the conversation Sam and I may or may not have had," Carly said quickly.

"Oh, well, yeah, that was the reason," Freddie said.

The two were silent for a moment.

"You regret it, don't you?" Carly said finally. "Breaking up with her."

Freddie gave a small smile. "Yeah…But you're not going to tell her that, are you?"

"No," Carly laughed. "But, about what Sam told me that I'm not supposed to tell you…I'm still not saying directly, but maybe, if you were to go over to her right now and tell her that you still have feelings for her…she wouldn't _not _feel the same way."

Freddie wrinkled his browns in thought. "So-So you're saying," Freddie said, coming to a slow understanding. "That-That the thing Sam told you not to tell me was that she still had feelings for me?"

"I'm not _saying _that," Carly said. "I told you, I-"

"-Can't, yeah, I know," Freddie finished for her.

"But Freddie," Carly said. "You two are my best friends. I wouldn't be giving you these painfully obvious hints that Sam would totally get back together with you if you make a move if I knew if wouldn't definitely work out. Look, I know you two are going to be moving across the country from each other soon, but…does that really matter? You could make it work, I know you could."

Freddie didn't reply.

"Just think how miserable you would be if you moved to California and Sam left for New York, and you didn't give this another try," Carly went on. "Do you really want to start off college like that?"

"No," Freddie said. "No…I-I don't think I could handle that."

"Then you know what you have to do," Carly urged him.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "I do."

He turned and headed out of the apartment and walked right into the Shay's apartment.

Sam was up and in the kitchen, scooping some ice cream into a bowl for her.

"What are you doing here at 3 in the morning?" Sam frowned, looking Freddie.

"This," Freddie replied, walking over to her. He pressed his lips against hers, feeling fireworks erupt once again.

When the couple pulled apart, Sam looked at him. "What was that?"

"Sam, remember that night we broke up in the elevator?"  
Sam nodded.

"We said we loved each other," Freddie said. "And I don't know about you, but I never stopped loving you. And well, I know we're going to be apart soon, but does that really mean we have to be _apart_?"

Sam looked over Freddie's shoulder at Carly, who was watching this scene from the doorway. "You told, didn't you?"

"I did not!" Carly said indignantly. "I happened to offer Freddie a few suggestions, but he came to this conclusion all on his own."

"It's true," Freddie said. Then he took a deep breath. "I love you, Sam."

Sam smiled. "I love you too."

"Yes!" Carly cheered. "Another successful relationship mended thanks to Carly!"

"What's happening?" Spencer said, jumping awake on the couch.

"Oh nothing, Sam and Freddie just got back together thanks to me," Carly grinned.

"But I thought you didn't tell him anything," Sam pointed out.

"Yeah, well," Carly laughed. "Fine. My _suggestions_ got them back together.


	203. Chapter 203

_Text_

"Mom, I'm bored," Jason, Sam and Freddie's twelve-year old son sighed, sitting down next to his mom on the couch.

"You can watch this show with me," Sam offered.

"It's just some boring cooking show, though," Jason said.

"Hey, nothing with food is _ever_ boring," Sam said firmly. "But if you don't want to watch this, then go play with Tyler."

"Tyler's four, mom," Jason said. "He only likes to do boring things that four-year olds like to do."

"Hmm, seems like you're out of luck then, kid," Sam said. "Why didn't you go with your dad and the twins to the movies?"

"Because the move they were going to see looked-"

"-Boring, right?" Sam said knowingly, grinning at her son.

"Yeah," Jason nodded. "There's nothing to do around here."

"Well your dad and your sisters should be home any minute," Sam said. "When they get back, you can ask your dad if you can play those special edition _Galaxy Wars _games he bought."

Right on cue, Freddie walked through the front door with his and Sam's eight-year old twins, Emma and Ashton.

"Hey, how was the movie?" Sam asked.  
"Awesome," Emma said. "The kids in it had this really cool tree house that did all sorts of things!"

"Yeah, it could fly and turn into a car," Ashton nodded.

"_And_," Emma continued. "Daddy said that he'd make us a tree house in our backyard, right daddy?"

Sam scoffed. "Em, you _do _realize who your dad is, right?"

"Hey, I can build my kids a tree house," Freddie said.

"It's going to be so cool," Ashton said. "Emma and I can play up there all the time! We can invite Clarissa over! And there's going to be no boys allowed. Well, except for Jason and Tyler…sometimes. Oh, and Quincy."

"Ick, Quincy Gibson is _not _coming up in my tree house," Emma cringed.

"Okay, guys, why don't you go play upstairs," Freddie said, sitting down next to Sam.

"Hey dad, can I go play your _Galaxy Wars _game?" Jason asked.

"Sure, just create a new player file," Freddie nodded.

"Sweet!" Jason said excitedly, running out of the room.

"So," Sam said once Jason was gone. "How are you going to manage to get out of building a tree house? Those two were so excited…I think the only way you'll be able to make up for it would be to buy them a pony."

"Why would I need to get out of making the tree house?" Freddie asked.

"Oh, come on," Sam laughed. "It's you! You can't do anything that involves tools!"

"Hey, I happen to take offense to that," Freddie said indignantly.

"Baby," Sam said. "You got about twenty splinters just trying to fix the railing on the stairs last month."

"It wasn't twenty," Freddie mumbled.

"Freddie," Sam said, shaking her head. "I know you were probably just trying to make the girls happy, but building them a tree house?"

"I can do it," Freddie said.

"Okay," Sam said, clearly not convinced. "Whatever you say."

"Besides," Freddie continued. "I wasn't planning on building the thing by myself. I was going to have Spencer and Gib help me out. That's three guys building _one _tree house. How hard can that be?"

"Well, considering that the three of you barely qualify as men…"

"Ha, ha," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "You'll see. Once I build our kids the best tree house _ever_, I'll be the cool parent."

"Please," Sam said. "You couldn't be the cool parent if you tried."

"Just wait and see," Freddie said, grinning. "Just wait and see."

….

"Alright, I've got the wood, hammers, nails, screws, power drill, and paint," Spencer said, looking through the large pile of materials he had just moved into the Benson's backyard.

"Nice," Freddie said. "I'm thinking we can build it in that big tree over there."

"You know, me and Guppy had a tree house when we were kids," Gibby said. "I remember those days…staying up late in there, watching the stars while our mom would come up and comb our eyebrows."

"Your mom combed your eyebrows?" Freddie frowned. "Dude, that's so weird."

"Yeah, almost as weird as a mom giving you tick baths into your teens," Spencer pointed out.

"Alright then, I'll shut up," Freddie said quickly. "So how do we get started on this? What do we do first?"

"Well, as a professional sculptor, the first thing you need to do when building something like this is to make the base," Spencer said. "Man, you building novices are so lucky you have me around."

"Yeah, but just do me a favor and stay away from the power saw," Freddie said. "Or anything potentially flammable."

"Oh come on, I'm past that stage where I set everything on fire," Spencer said, bending down to begin picking up a large wood board. "It's been a long time since I've-Ah!"

The board he had just picked up suddenly burst into flames.

"Well, I've got to appreciate the irony in that," Freddie sighed.

…

"Wait, where do I put this nail?" Gibby asked.

"Hammer it in right here," Spencer said as him and Freddie heaved up one of the walls of the tree house.

"Wow, you guys, I've got to say, this is coming along really nicely," Freddie said.

"Yeah, the kids will really love it," Spencer agreed.

"Uh-huh," Freddie nodded. "And more importantly, I'll be able to rub it in Sam's face that I _did _manage to get this thing built."

"You?" Gibby frowned. "You made _me _do most of the lifting!"

"Yeah, and I was the creative genius of this whole thing!" Spencer said.

"Guys come on," Freddie pleaded. "You're all married; you know how rare it is that we get to prove our wives wrong! Let me just have this, please?"

"Okay," Spencer said. "You can take all the credit. Once this thing is done, you can tell Sam Gib and I were just your little worker monkeys."

"Could we not be monkeys?" Gibby asked. "I'm still not a fan of them. Not after that trip to the zoo…"

"Wow," came Carly's voice as her and Sam walked out to the backyard. "This thing actually looks like it'll turn out decent."

"We're almost done," Freddie said proudly. "We just need to bring up the last wall that has the door in it and then we're done. See, Sam? I got this thing built."

"Gibby and Spencer probably did most of the hard work," Sam said, crossing her arms.

"They did not!" Freddie said. "Did you guys?"

"No, we were his little worker rhinos," Gibby said promptly.

"Worker rhinos?" Sam repeated.

"What? You guys know I hate monkeys!" Gibby exclaimed.

"Go inside and get the kids," Freddie said as him and the others got down from the tree to get the last wall. "I want them to see the finished product of their father's labor."

"You _really _need to get over yourself, Fredbag," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Jealous?" Freddie smirked.

"No," Sam snapped as she turned to go back into the house.

"She's jealous," Freddie said triumphantly as the men began to screw in the final wall.

…

Sam came out with the kids a few minutes later.

"Wow!" Emma exclaimed, looking up at the majestic looking tree house. "It's so big!"

"It's bigger than my room!" Tyler said.

"It looks just like a little house," Ashton said.

"You really built this, dad?" Jason asked.

"Well, your Uncle Spencer and Uncle Gibby helped a little," Freddie admitted.

"Can we play in it now?" Emma asked, jumping up and down with excitement. "Can we? Please?"

"Yeah, go ahead," Freddie nodded. "Just be careful."

The four kids sped over to the tree house and began climbing up to it.

"Wow, they're like little monkeys," Carly commented.

"Hey, can we cool it with the monkey talk already?" Gibby said.

"Dude, so the monkey at the zoo stole your fudge pop," Spencer said, rolling his eyes. "Get over it."

"I didn't see you getting over anything when your taco got spat on by the donkey at the petting zoo," Gibby retorted.

"Hey! That was a twelve dollar taco!"

"Well…anyway," Freddie said, turning to Sam. "Seems like our kids are really enjoying their new tree house, huh, Sam?"

"Yeah, well, they'll be bored with it after a few months," Sam mumbled.

"This is the best tree house ever!" Ashton called down from the tree. "Daddy, you're the best."

"Or _years_," Freddie smirked.

…

"Mommy, can't we _please _sleep in the tree house?" Emma pleaded.

"No, Emma, it's forty degrees outside, you'll freeze," Sam said. "Now come on, it's already ten o'clock. You and Ashton need to get to bed."

"Can we go play in it as soon as we wake up?" Ashton asked as her and Emma climbed into their beds.

"Yeah, sure," Sam sighed, tucking the girls in. She gave them each a kiss on their heads. "You really like that thing, don't you?"

"Yeah, I can't wait to tell our class about it," Emma said. "I bet none of them have one."

"Just get some sleep, okay?" Sam smiled, turning off the lights and closing the twins' door.

After checking to make sure Tyler was still asleep, Sam went down to the living room, where Jason was sitting on the floor by the coffee table.

"What'cha up to, kid?" Sam asked.

"Dad gave me one of his old model train kits that he never used when he was a kid," Jason said, looking up from the train he was assembling. "I think I'm almost done with it."

"Wow, that nub's really pushing it today," Sam said under her breath. She looked at her watch. "Hey, remember that robotics club trip at six o'clock tomorrow. You might want to get some sleep."

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that," Jason said, getting to his feet.

"That crazy club mom's going to pick you up," Sam said. "Your dad's going to get up and meet her. I packed you a lunch in the fridge."

"Okay, good night," Jason said, gathering up his train kit and heading upstairs.

Sam was just about to head into the kitchen make herself a snack when suddenly, her pear phone beeped; she had a text message. She looked at the screen and saw that it was from Freddie, which was odd, because as far as Sam knew, Freddie was still home.

She opened the message, curious as to why her husband would be texting her when he could easily walk over and ask her anything he needed.

_Meet me in the tree_, the message read.

Sam rolled her eyes. So the nub was still hanging out in his little tree house? Figuring Freddie wouldn't stop texting her until she went outside, she got up and headed to the backyard.

"Yo, Fredward, what do you want?" Sam called up, stopping at the base of the tree house.

"Come up here," Freddie called back.

"Are you serious? You're going to make me climb a tree?" Sam said. "You know I hate exerting energy!"

"Just do it."

Sighing, Sam climbed up the ladder.

"This better be important," Sam said, pulling herself into the tree house. "Or I'm going to-Oh. What-what is all this?"

She looked around the tree house. There were candles everywhere, and sitting in the middle of the tree house was a blanket with a picnic basket that looked like it contained Sam's favorite chocolate cake from the nearby bakery.

"Well," Freddie said, walking over to Sam and helping her to her feet. "I figured the kids shouldn't be the only ones to enjoy the tree house." He held out the hand that he had been keeping behind his back and handed Sam a red rose.

"So you turned it into an overly-romantic date spot?" Sam grinned.

"Uh-huh," Freddie nodded. He pulled Sam closer to him. "So what do you say? You want to stay up here in this tree house you seem to hate so much?"

Sam smiled. "Well, let's see if you can make me hate it less."

…

**AN-Well…Here we are. iCarly is officially over. I personally thought that iGoodbye was very funny. They brought back a lot of old jokes and I laughed a lot throughout it. I also thought the bit at the end, where all the characters remembered back to when iCarly first began was very touching and sweet. Definitely a great closing. And of course, finally seeing Carly's dad was great. **

**However, with all that said…in terms of shipping, I'm still VERY confused, and I'm sure a lot of people are too. First of all, I do NOT believe that Creddie was end game, despite what creddiers seem to think. Yeah, they kissed, but clearly nothing else was going to happen in that relationship. I think it's fair to say that Carly and Freddie parted as friends. I mean, if there was really something going on between them, I think their final goodbye would've been more than a hug before Carly got into the elevator. But I don't understand what happened between Sam and Freddie? All us Seddiers were just totally left in the dark about what happens to those too! Sam never said she DIDN'T want to get back together with Freddie, and Freddie never said he didn't want to get back with her either! The whole thing just left the fans totally clueless! **

**Plus I was also confused about the fact that they kept saying that it wasn't goodbye. Unless they plan on doing a big reunion episode…but whatever. As I said, despite the shipping, I really liked that end to the show. And we still have Sam and Cat to come. I'm hoping we can see Freddie on that, even if it is just for a few episodes. **


	204. Chapter 204

**AN-Hey, so this is a sequel to chapter 167, where Sam and Freddie decide to try and stop arguing in front of their kids after their seven-year old daughter comes to them thinking that they are getting a divorce.**

…**..**

_Cooking_

"Sam, you left the stove on!" Freddie said, turning the knob on the stove as Sam set the pot she had just been heating down onto the kitchen table.

"I was going back to turn it off!" Sam said. "You act like I left it on all night; I literally walked away from the stove two seconds ago!"

"You've been away from it for more than two seconds," Freddie said. "See, if you would just let us get the stove that's motion censored and turns off automatically when you walk away from it-"

"Do you know how small that oven is?" Sam said. "You could barely fit any meat in there!"

"Well so long as you don't shove a fifty pound ham in there, I really don't see why-"

But just then, Sam and Freddie's four kids ran into the kitchen, obviously knowing by the smells that it was dinnertime.

"Well, Sam," Freddie said, calming his voice at once at the sight of his children coming into the room. "I respect your opinion about the stove."

"Um, yeah, _baby,_" Sam said. "I respect your opinion about it too. Maybe later we can discuss it more."

"I agree," Freddie nodded. "I love you."

"Love you too," Sam said, giving her husband a quick peck on the lips. "Okay guys, who's hungry?"

"Why are you guys acting so weird?" eleven-year old Jason frowned, looking at his parents.

"What? We're not acting weird!" Freddie said as Sam began to spoon spaghetti onto the kids' plates. "Your mom and I were just having a nice discussion about the stove."

"Yeah," Sam nodded, sliding a plate in front of Ashton. "A pleasant, calm talk."

"Yup, because we love each other so much," Freddie smiled, putting his arm around Sam.

"Gross," Emma cringed.

"Mommy, I want some 'pasgetti!" three-year old Tyler said.

"Okay, here you go, Ty," Sam said, placing a small plate in front to the toddler.

"Well, doesn't this look good?" Freddie said, sitting down at his place at the table. "Your mom really has a gift for cooking."

"Aw, thank you, Freddie," Sam grinned. "I couldn't have done it without your help, though. You stirred the sauce for a whole three minutes while I made the garlic bread. If anyone deserves the credit here, it's you."

"Okay, this is too bizarre," Jason said, dropping his fork. "Seriously, what's up with you guys?"

"Nothing," Sam said. "What? Your mom and dad, who love each other _very _much can't compliment each other during dinner?"

"Yeah, nothing's wrong with that, right, Ashton?" Freddie said.

"Nope," Ashton said happily. "Mommy and daddy love each other, Jason!"

"Yeah, but this is just creepy," Jason said, shaking his head.

"Just eat your dinner," Sam said. "We have ice cream for desert when you finish."

"Yay! What kind?" Emma asked through her mouth stuffed with meatballs.

"I bought fudge nut swirl," Sam said.

"Fudge nut?" Freddie repeated. "They-They didn't have mint?"

"What's wrong with fudge nut?" Sam asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Well nothing, other than the fact that you know I hate ice cream with nuts in it," Freddie said.

"Well I like that flavor, and I was the one who went to the store," Sam said. "Because _somebody _was too busy polishing his new high-tech video camera."

"I had to polish it! You scratched it up when you-"

But then Sam and Freddie realized that their kids were watching them.

"See, _this_ is more like it," Jason said.

"Um, I mean…I'm looking forward to trying that ice cream, Sam," Freddie said.

"Well, the store's open pretty late," Sam said. "I could just run out and get you your mint ice cream if you want."

"No, don't worry about it, baby," Freddie said.

"Are you sure? I mean, I _love_ you, so I don't mind doing it," Sam said.

"Okay, now you guys are right back to being weird!" Jason said. "What the heck is going on here?"

Sam and Freddie exchanged looks. This no fighting thing was going to be harder than they thought.

…..

"Well, I'd say we completely over did it at dinner, wouldn't you?" Sam sighed, handing Freddie a stack of dishes to wash.

"Yeah," Freddie agreed. "Luckily I think Jason was really the only one who noticed how weird we were acting. Tyler's too young, Emma was more interested in making sure she got third servings of meatballs, and Ashton was just happy that we weren't fighting."

"But Freddie, we _suck _at not fighting," Sam said. "It's me and you! I mean, we never even really fought about anything serious in front of the kids, just stupid little things. Is that really that bad?"

"I didn't think it was," Freddie sighed. "But last night when Ashton came crying to us because she thought we were getting a divorce…That's not okay, Sam."

"Yeah, I know that," Sam nodded. "And we're going to work on not fighting as much in front of the kids."

"Definitely," Freddie said.

"But I don't think we have to be so…nauseatingly nice to each other either," Sam smiled.

"I think maybe we should talk to Ashton again," Freddie said.

"Yeah, that's probably a good idea," Sam nodded.

…..

Later that night, Sam and Freddie walked into the twins' bedroom.

"Can't we stay up later?" Emma pleaded, hopping onto her bed.

"The deal was you get your bedtime moved to eight thirty your next birthday," Sam smiled.

"But that's in ten months!" Emma exclaimed.

"Believe me, Em, there will come a time when you'd do anything just to be able to go to sleep early," Freddie said. He sat down at the end of Ashton's bed. "We wanted to talk to you about something."

"What?" Emma asked.

"It's about what we talked about last night, Ash," Sam said, sitting down on Emma's bed. "What did you guys talk about last night?" Emma asked.

"Ashton was worried that mommy and daddy were going to get a divorce," Sam explained.

"What's that?"

"It's when a mommy and daddy decide that they don't love each other anymore, and that they don't want to live together," Freddie explained.

Emma's eyes widened. "Are you and mommy getting one of those?"

"No, sweetie, don't worry about that," Sam said quickly.

"Okay, good," Emma said, relieved. She looked at her sister. "How come you think mommy and daddy are getting a divorce thing then?"

"Because they fight a lot," Ashton said. "But they're not going to anymore, because they love each other, right?"

"Your mom and I absolutely, 100 percent love each other very, _very _much," Freddie nodded. "And like we said, we're not going to get a divorce."

"But Ashton," Sam said gently. "We want you to understand something…Mommy and daddy love each other, but that doesn't mean we're never going to fight."

"That's right," Freddie nodded. "But you know what we always do after we fight? After every single time?"

"What?" Ashton asked.

"We make up," Sam said.

"Every time?" Ashton questioned.

"Every time," Freddie said.

"So you guys are _sure_ you and mommy aren't going to get a divorce?" Ashton asked.

"Uh-huh," Freddie said. "And you want to know how we know that?"

"How?"

"Because my parents, and your mom's parents, both got divorced when we were kids," Freddie explained. "We both know what that's like. And believe me, we're not even close to being like that."

"You have a daddy, mom?" Emma asked, looking up at her mom.

Sam laughed. "Well, yeah. Everyone has one."

"How come I never saw him? We still see daddy's daddy sometimes," Emma said.

"My dad decided that, well…he didn't really want to be a dad anymore," Sam said, smiling as she stroked her daughter.

"Huh?"

"I'll explain it to you some day when you're older," Sam said, kissing the top of her head. "But the point of this whole thing is…no matter how much daddy and I fight, we love each other very much. And we love you guys very much too. And your brothers."

Ashton nodded.

"Alright, well, you guys have effectively managed to stay up an extra ten minutes," Freddie said, looking at his watch. "Time for you to get to sleep now."

"Night," Emma said, sliding under her covers.

"Night," Ashton yawned, laying down.


	205. Chapter 205

_Field_

"Why do you want to do this again?" Sam asked as Freddie dumped a huge pile of different colored frosting tubes, assorted candies and other colorful items onto to the kitchen table.

"Because, it will be a fun, family activity," Freddie said.

"So would watching the MMA Very Merry Christmas special," Sam said.

"Ha, ha," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Did you bake the gingerbread?"

"You know, why do _I _have to be the one to bake the gingerbread?" Sam asked.

"Do you really want to eat cookies _I _bake?" Freddie asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Eh, good point," Sam said. "And don't worry; they're in the oven right now."

"Good," Freddie said. "So now we have everything to make the perfect Benson family gingerbread house."

"Okay, seriously, what's up with this sudden urge to make a big family gingerbread house?" Sam asked.

"I told you, it's something fun we can all do together," Freddie said. "I mean, I've been thinking…the kids are really growing up, Sam. Jason's already in college, the girls just turned fifteen a few months ago…heck, even Tyler's growing up! He's in middle school! I just think it'd be nice to make as many family memories as possible before it's too late."

"Okay, for the last time, will you stop reading those parenting magazines in line at the grocery store," Sam said. "It's annoying having you spurting our little parental wisdoms all day."

"Come on, Sam, you have to agree that it's a good idea to spend more time with the kids all together," Freddie said.

"We spend time with them," Sam said. "Just last night we went to Tyler's football game, didn't we?"

"Yeah, but that was just you and me with Tyler," Freddie pointed out. "Jason was out visiting his friends that just got home from college for the holidays, and Emma and Ashton were out with Clarissa at the mall. It seems like the only thing we have time to do together as a family anymore with the kids always going out is eat dinner every night."

Sam sighed. "You're not going to let this go, are you?"

"Nope."

"Well…" Sam said. "I _guess _this is a good excuse to eat a bunch of icing."

"There you go," Freddie said. "Okay, you take the cookies out, I'll go get the kids." Freddie headed into the living room, where him and Sam's four children were sitting on the couch, watching T.V.

"Hey guys, what are you watching?" Freddie asked.

"I dunno, something," Emma shrugged.

"Well how about you turn it off then," Freddie said.

"What? No way!" Tyler frowned.

"You guys just said you don't even know what you're watching!"

"Yeah, but it's cool," Jason said.

"Just go into the kitchen," Freddie said, taking the remote and turning off the television.

"Why? Dinner's over," Ashton said.

"I know, but we're going to spend some quality family time together," Freddie said.

"Oh, you've _got _to be kidding me," Emma said.

"Come on, it'll be fun," Freddie said.

"But daddy, it's Friday night," Ashton said. "Clarissa and I were going to go hang out at the movies."

"You see Clarissa everyday, Ash," Freddie pointed out.

"Yeah, but you and mom saw Clarissa's mom every day when you were my age," Ashton said. "I'm just trying to follow in my parents footsteps."

"And dad, the Cobras game starts soon," Tyler said. "They're finally playing a team they have a chance of beating; I can't miss that!"

"You can catch the highlights online," Freddie said.

"What are we even doing?" Jason asked as him and his siblings followed Freddie into the kitchen.

"We," Freddie said. "Are going to make an authentic, delicious, perfect gingerbread house that we'll be able to-Sam! Stop eating the gingerbread making materials!"

"You took too long!" Sam snapped, popping a few more gumdrops in her mouth.

"A gingerbread house?" Jason repeated.

"Yeah!" Freddie said. "Sounds fun, huh?"

"Fun's not exactly the word I would use," Emma mumbled under her breath.

"Hey, you get to eat it when we're done," Sam said.

"I'm in," Emma said at once.

"Can I lick the bowl from the dough?" Tyler asked.

"Well I finished half of it, but there's some still left in the bowl in the sink," Sam said. "Knock yourself out."

"Sweet!" Tyler said, running over to the sink.

"That's two in," Freddie said. He turned to Jason and Ashton.

"We're going to be guilted into this somehow, aren't we?" Jason sighed.

"I was," Sam said.

"Alright, alright, I'll help out with this gingerbread house," Jason said. "I mean, since I'm in college now, it's not like I have a curfew. I can just go out after this and have some fun."

"You'll be back at two," Sam said.

"I'll be back at two."

"Okay, I guess I can give up _one _Friday night," Ashton said. "Besides, I _have _been looking for some way to try out all these interior designing tips I picked up from Fashionista T.V, and I guess I can try and make them work for a gingerbread house."

"Yes!" Freddie said happily. "And operation Benson-Gingerbread House is a go!"

"Oh my God," Sam said, shaking her head. "That did _not _just come out of your mouth."

"I have the blueprint for this all drawn out," Freddie said. "It took me three days of planning, but I think it's just about perfect."

"Three days?" Emma frowned. "You've been planning the for three days?"

"Yes I have," Freddie said. "Now, what we have here is going to be a two story gingerbread house, complete with a fine peppermint border with gumdrop shingles. I think I can get it where the door really opens, too, with the proper amount of frosting, of course. And then we'll surround the whole house by a lovely open field, made with green frosting and candy cane trees. See? Isn't this going to be a blast? Okay, let's get started!"

"How do we even make one of these things?" Jason asked, picking up two flat squares of gingerbread. "Just stick them together with frosting?"

"You're the engineering major, genius," Emma said. "Shouldn't you know how build a simple gingerbread house?"

"Come on, it can't be that hard," Freddie said. "See you just stand these two things up, slap a little frosting on it-"

"You know, maybe we should make different colored frosting with some food coloring," Ashton said. "That way we could color-coordinate this whole thing. We can make pink frosting to hold together the roof-"

"I'm not going to be a part of making the most girly, daffodilly gingerbread house ever, Ashton," Emma said, rolling her eyes.

"Yeah, we don't want pink!" Tyler agreed.

"Well!" Ashton said indignantly.

"Hey, I think I got one wall to stand!" Jason said happily.

"Yeah, but you have about ten pounds of icing on it," Sam smiled.

"It's up, isn't it?" Jason pointed out.

"Um, yeah, it is," Freddie agreed. "Well, I guess it's a good thing I bought so much frosting at the store. Between all that you just used and all that your moms' been eating-"

"Hey, that's your own fault for putting it in front of me," Sam said, spooning another dollop of frosting into her mouth.

"Yeah, you'd think I'd know better," Freddie grinned. "Well, know that we've finally got one wall of this thing up, let's keep going people! This isn't going to build itself!"

…

"Well," Sam said, looking at the finished product of two hours of work. "There it is…your family gingerbread house that you wanted so much."

Her and Freddie were staring at the pile of gingerbread and frosting and a variety of candies that barely resembled a house of any sort.

"Yup," Freddie nodded.

"Didn't turn out too much like your little blueprint, huh?" Sam said.

"Eh, that's okay," Freddie said, pulling out his pearphone to snap a pic of the misshaped gingerbread house. "I still think it looks pretty great. Besides, it was a fun time, don't you think?"

"You know what, Frednub," Sam said. "I have to say; that wasn't as lame as I thought. And the kids actually seemed to enjoy it too. Plus, now that the whole building thing's over, we get to finally eat this baby!"

"That _is _the best part, isn't it?" Freddie chuckled. "Hey, kids! Who's ready to see if the gingerbread house tastes as good as it looks?"

"About time," Emma said, hurrying over and scooping up some icing.

"Can we make a gingerbread house tomorrow night too?" Tyler asked as him, Ashton and Jason joined the family around the gingerbread house.

"I don't think we can handle you this hopped on sugar two days in a row, kiddo," Sam said.

"I can't believe we never did this before," Ashton said, taking a bite of gingerbread.

"Yeah, we should do it again sometime," Jason agreed. "Hey, why don't we make this one of those dorky little family traditions?"

"Yeah, we can do it every December," Emma nodded.

"You kids really want to do that?" Freddie asked.

All four of them nodded.

"Well alright then," Freddie said, beaming. "Gingerbread making is now officially a Benson family tradition!"


	206. Chapter 206

**AN-So I got this request way before iGoodbye, but when I started writing it, I thought it would be cool to kind of make it go along with iGoodbye. Hope you enjoy. **

**Oh, and to answer a question I got, I get the titles for these chapters from a random word generator, and then I just pick one when I begin writing the oneshot. Even if I only use the word once, it actually helps me think up what I'm going to write about. **

…**..**

_Annoying_

"Wait, put the banner a little higher," Freddie said, watching as Spencer and Gibby struggled to hang a large banner in Spencer's kitchen. "It looks a bit higher up on the left side than it is on the right."

"If you're going to be so picky, why don't you come do it?" Spencer snapped, trying to keep his balance on the ladder he was standing on.

"You guys still haven't hung that banner yet?" Sam asked, letting herself into the apartment carrying a stack of pizzas. "I left half an hour ago to get these pizzas!"

"Freddie keeps complaining that it's lopsided," Gibby told her.

"Fine, have a lopsided banner, see if I care," Freddie shrugged.

"Dude, it's fine; quit being annoying," Sam said, setting down the pizzas on the counter. "Okay, so decorations are up, we have food, music…what time's Carly getting in again?"

"Um, she left Italy at three this morning," Spencer replied. "So her plane should be landing in about two hours. Man, wait until she sees this surprise party we have for her! She's going to be so surprised!"

"Hey, is that where the name comes from?" Gibby asked, hopping down from the counter. "I always wondered why they were called surprise parties and not, oh, I dunno, glad parties or scared parties or some other emotion."

"What's _wrong _with you?" Sam frowned. Then she shook her head. "You know what? Never mind. I don't have time to hear it." She turned to Freddie. "So you have everything all set up for iCarly tonight?"

"Yup," Freddie nodded. "Wow…Can you believe this is going to our first web show in almost ten months?"

"I can't believe its been that long since we've seen Carly," Spencer said.

"Yeah, I don't know how we did it, but we all survived," Sam smiled.

"At least she's coming back for good now that her dad's been stationed in Washington again," Freddie said. He put his arm around Sam. "Bet your happy about that?"

"Eh, your company wasn't _that _bad," Sam grinned, giving him a quick kiss.

"Gross," Spencer cringed. "I'm sure Carly doesn't want to walk back in here and see her best friends making out in the middle of her surprise party."

"Yeah, that would be really weird, since Carly doesn't even know they're together," Gibby said.

"Gibby!" Sam and Freddie exclaimed.  
"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Spencer said. "You guys got together like, a month after Carly left. You mean in all that time since you haven't told her?"

"Well…we didn't want to tell her before we really knew if this was anything serious," Freddie said. "I mean, last time we were together we barely lasted a month, remember?"

"Okay, but now its been nine months," Spencer said. "And from all the make-out sessions I've been forced to walk in on lately, I'd say it's pretty serious."

"Look, we've been wanting to tell her for awhile now," Sam said. "But every time we get a chance to video chat with her, it's hard to bring up. Carly hasn't exactly had the best dating life over in Italy, you know. Not many guys speak English. The closest thing she's had to a date is the son of a guy in her dad's unit asking her to get gelato…with a group of four other people. We didn't want to rub our relationship in her face."

"But we're going to tell her," Freddie said. "Tonight. Before we do iCarly."

"Speaking of iCarly," Gibby said. "Since it's sort of a big show tonight, do you think I could-"

"No," Sam said, cutting him off. "There's no way we're letting you do your bra skit."

"Aw, come on!" Gibby moaned. "You guys never let me have any fun."

…..

"Alright, Carly. Here we are! Walking into the apartment!" Spencer said loudly, opening the door for his sister.

"Yeah, Spencer, I see that," Carly smiled. "I know its been ten months, but I still think I-"

"Surprise!" Sam, Freddie, Gibby and T-Bo all shouted, catching Carly off guard.

"Oh my God, what is all this?" Carly exclaimed, grinning.

"A surprise party!" Spencer said. "For you!"

"Aw, you guys, you didn't have to do this," Carly said as Sam rushed over to her best friend.

"Shoosh yeah we did!" Sam said as her and Carly embraced. "We haven't seen you in almost a year! Well, other than over webcams, but that doesn't count."

"Yeah," Freddie agreed as him and Carly exchanged quick hugs. "We had to go all out."

"And see, I even made Italian smoothies for the occasion," T-Bo said, pointing to the kitchen table, where he had dozens of cups set up.

"Oh wow, that actually sounds like a good smoothie idea," Carly laughed. "So what kinds did you make? Oh, did you use the gelato?"

"Nah, too pricy. T-Bo's got to make a profit," T-Bo replied. "I've got Spicy Meatball Mania, Lasagna Luxury and Pizza Paddodle."

"Paddodle?" Carly repeated.

"I came up with that one," Gibby said proudly.

"Glad to see you haven't changed a bit, Gib," Carly chuckled. "So, do I even want to know _what _a Paddodle is?"

"No you do not," Freddie said.

"You want to try one?" T-Bo asked, handing Carly a cup.

"Um…I'm actually pretty full from all the airline peanuts," Carly said quickly.

"Suit yourself," Sam said, taking the smoothie and slurping down half of it in one gulp.

"Man, it's so good to be back," Carly said, looking around at her brother and friends. "Being in Italy with my dad was fun and all, but you have no idea how much I missed you guys."

"We missed you too, kid," Spencer said. "You have to tell us all about Italy."

"Yeah, I hear Italian babes are smoking," T-Bo said. "Is that true?"

"Um, sure, I guess," Carly said. "But I'll tell you about Italy later. Right now I really want to catch up on what's been going on with you guys. Anything new?"

"Er…" Sam began, looking at Freddie. "Actually-"

"I started an acrobatics club at school," Gibby announced.

"Really?" Carly said. "I didn't know you could do anything flexible."

"I can put my whole fist in my mouth," Gibby said.

"Um, no offense, but how does that qualify as acrobatics?" Carly asked.

"It takes real skill!"

"Okay, okay," Carly conceded. She turned back to Sam and Freddie. "Anyway, what were you going to-"

But just then, Freddie's phone began to beep.

"Holy chiz, it's already seven o'clock," Freddie said, looking at his screen. "We need to start getting ready for iCarly!"

"That's right!" Carly said. "I can't believe we're finally doing the show again! It's been so weird _not_ doing it for this long."

"I know," Sam agreed.

"The Internet's been going crazy ever since you made the announcement that you were going to start the show back up again last week," Spencer said. "You'd better go set up. You don't want to keep those fans waiting."

"Yeah, good idea," Carly nodded. "How about we finish up this party once the web show is over?"

"Sounds like a plan," Freddie said. He picked up his video camera, which he had sitting on the coffee table. "Let's see if after ten months we've still go it."

…..

"How many?" Sam exclaimed.

"Two million, nine hundred and seventy-one thousand views tonight," Freddie grinned, setting down his camera. "More than twice our largest audience."

"That's insane!" Carly said. "Come on, I think this deserves a group hug!"

She held out her arms for Sam and Freddie to join her. Sam and Freddie avoided eye contact with each other. Right about now, the wanted to do a bit more than participate in a group hug with the other…

"Should we head back downstairs now?" Carly asked. "Hopefully Gibby got his head out of pot by now…"

"Um, Carly, you think we could sort of talk to you first?" Freddie asked. "It's about what Sam started to tell you earlier."

"Oh, sure. What's up?" Carly asked.

"Okay, well, first, don't freak out," Sam said.

"Oh God," Carly sighed. "This isn't sounding promising…Freddie, you knew that with me gone it was going to be your job to keep Sam out of prison!"

"It's nothing like that," Freddie said quickly.

"Yeah, I haven't been in any legal trouble since you've left," Sam assured her. "Well, other than that whole incident at Build-A-Bra, but that old lady in there was asking for it."

"Well then what is it?" Carly asked.

"Look," Freddie said. "Sam and I realize this is something we should've probably brought up during one of our web chats a long time ago. But the timing never seemed right."

"Guys, you're really starting to sound weird," Carly frowned. "Just tell me what's going on."

Sam took a deep breath. "Freddie and I have been dating."  
Carly didn't reply.

"Um, we started about a month after you left," Freddie added.

Again, Carly didn't say anything. Sam and Freddie looked at each other, confused.

"Carls, we're really sorry we didn't tell you sooner," Sam said.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "But we just wanted-"

"Wait, is that all?" Carly asked.

"What?" Sam frowned.

"What do you mean 'is that all'?" Freddie asked. "Aren't you going to freak out about us keeping it from you for so long? I mean, you went crazy when you found out me and Sam kissed each other back in the ninth grade, after all."

"You guys," Carly laughed, rolling her eyes. "I might have been in Italy for the past ten months, but that doesn't mean I'm an idiot!"

"Wait, I'm lost," Sam said, shaking her head.

"Come on," Carly said, smiling. "I've known you guys have been seeing each other for months know."

"Huh?" Sam and Freddie said simultaneously.

"You guys may have been careful to avoid specifically saying anything to me on our web chats," Carly said. "But I do have eyes, you know. You guys would always give each other little 'couple' looks. Sam, you didn't hit Freddie as aggressively as you usually do. Freddie, you laughed after pretty much everything Sam said. Plus there was time you and Sam were practically sitting in each others laps!"

"So…you knew this whole time?" Sam asked. "But why didn't you say anything?"

"Yeah, you're Carly, for crying out loud!" Freddie said.

"Oh, believe me, it wasn't easy," Carly said. "But, well…I knew that trying your relationship again was probably going to be hard on both of you. I didn't want to add any stress to it."

"Thanks, Carls," Sam smiled. "But I think we're pretty safe with it now."

"Yeah," Freddie agreed. "We made it this far."

"That's great, you guys," Carly said. "I'm really happy for you two. At least you managed to have some romance this past year. I've been boy deprived for way too long!"

"That's tough kid," Sam said. "But now that you're back where the guys speak English, you'll have no problem."

"Well, I _did _manage to get the cute guy at the baggage check's number a few hours ago," Carly grinned.

"Wow, impressive," Freddie laughed.

"Well thanks," Carly said. "But hey, we should get back downstairs…I really hope T-Bo doesn't make me try one of those Italian smoothies, though."

"Hey, give the meatball one a chance," Sam said. "It's probably the best thing I've tasted in my life."

"It's like I never left," Carly laughed.


	207. Chapter 207

**AN-This is a sequel to ch172, Sphere, when Gibby accidently lets it slip to Spencer that Sam and Freddie are living together. **

…**..**

_Urge_

"Hey," Sam said as Freddie walked through the door of her apartment that they both now inhabited. "How was your 'Dude's Night'?"

"Good, but why the air quotes around Dude's Night?" Freddie asked, tossing his keys into the bowl by the front door.

"Because neither you, Gibby, T-Bo or Spencer really qualify as dudes," Sam said.

"Oh really? Then why am I referred to as your _boy_friend?" Freddie asked, chuckling.

"Eh, I guess you have _some _dude-like qualities," Sam laughed, getting up off the couch. She put her arms around Freddie's neck and kissed him.

"Well thank you," Freddie smiled.

"I ordered Chinese food," Sam said as the couple pulled apart. "There are some eggrolls left in the fridge if you want."

"Nah, I'm good," Freddie replied. "We ordered pizza at Spencer's. By the way, he knows."

"Know what?" Sam frowned.

"He knows we're living together."

"What? Are you serious?" Sam exclaimed. "What did you tell him for, nub! He's going to totally overreact!"

"_I _didn't tell him!" Freddie defended. "Gibby did!"

"And when did telling Gibby in the first place seem like a good idea?" Sam snapped.

"Look, Spencer did overact at first…but he's cool about it now," Freddie explained. "He was just a little overprotective of you. After I told him that the reason we moved in together was because we really love each other, he was a little more comfortable with the idea. Besides, we had to tell him eventually, didn't we?"

"Yeah, I guess so," Sam sighed. "And anyway, Spencer's really not the one we have to worry about finding out, is he? As long as we just make sure your mom _never _finds out, we'll be good."

"Oh yeah," Freddie agreed. "I mean, can you imagine? She'd probably run over here and start pounding at the door so she could drag me back to live with her and-"

They were interrupted, though, by a sudden banging on the front door.

"Open up this door right now!" came a voice from outside. A voice that Sam and Freddie recognized to be…

"My mom?" Freddie whispered in shock, his eyes widening. "What the-What do we do?"

"Okay, okay, just be quiet," Sam whispered back. She ran to the door. "Um, Mrs. Benson?" she called through the door, making sure the lock was firmly in place. "I think you have the wrong apartment. _I _live here. Freddie's place is over on the next block, remember?"

"Don't you give me any of that garbage, Samantha Puckett!" Mrs. Benson said angrily. And then with strength that could only be rivaled by Sam herself, she broke in the door.

"Mom!" Freddie exclaimed. "Are you kidding me? You broke down my girlfriend's door!"

"You mister," Marissa said, ignoring her son's words as she marched right to him. "Are in _deep _trouble!"

"Um, why?" Freddie asked hesitantly.

"How dare you think that you could get away with…_habituating _with your girlfriend without me finding out!"

Sam and Freddie exchanged glances.

"Okay, mom, just calm down," Freddie said.

"I most certainly will not calm down!" Marissa said hotly. "I've raised you better than this, Fredward Benson! I would think that you would know better than to-"

But she was cut off as Spencer, sweating and out of breath, came running into the apartment.

"Freddie…Sam…" he panted, leaning against the destroyed door frame has he tried to catch his breath. "She knows. Mrs. Benson-Oh, hi there, Mrs. Benson. Lovely day, isn't it?"

"You _told _her?" Freddie frowned. "Spencer, you promised me you wouldn't! I can't believe-"

"I didn't tell her!" Spencer said. "After you left, Gibby was heading out, and he mentioned something about running over to here to drop off your no-more-tears conditioner he borrowed from you since you live here now."

"Again, _stop telling Gibby things_!" Sam hissed.

"Anyway, I ran over here as fast as I could," Spencer said, still breathing heavily. "And now I think I might just take a nap on the floor…" And with that, Spencer collapsed onto the floor.

"Mom," Freddie sighed. "I know you really like your…traditional views. But I've told you a million times. Sam and I are in love. Moving in together…it just felt right. I'm sorry we didn't come out and tell you, but well, now that you know, can't you at least try to be a _little _understanding?"

Marissa crossed her arms. "But Freddie…I-I-You're just a boy!"

"He's twenty two!" Sam pointed out.

"You hush!" Marissa snapped. She turned back to Freddie. "Now Freddie, I understand that boys your age have certain…urges-"

"Oh my God," Freddie mumbled, his face turning red. "Mom, please don't-"

"Alright, alright, I think I know what's going on here," Spencer said, bringing himself to his feet. "Mrs. Benson, you're not _really _upset about the fact that Freddie moved in with Sam, his girlfriend."

Mrs. Benson let out a huff. "Excuse me?"

"Okay, maybe you're mad about that," Spencer said. "But that's not the main issue. I think the main issue is that Freddie moved out from your place period."

"What do you mean?" Sam asked.

"We all know that Mrs. Benson has some…attachment issues with Freddie," Spencer explained. "I think the problem she's having is that Freddie would rather live with Sam than with her."

"Wait, is that true, mom?" Freddie asked.

"Well I'm your _mother, _Freddie!" Marissa said. "What does _she _have that I don't?"

"Um, well, you know…" Freddie said awkwardly, a bit confused about the turn this conversation just took. "Mom, I know that you don't like to admit it, but I have grown up. And generally, when people grow up, they leave their parents' care."

Marissa choked back tears.

"But," Freddie added quickly. "Mom, just because I'm living with Sam now instead of you, doesn't mean you're still not my mom and I'm not your son. I still love you, you know."

"Oh, Freddikins!" Marissa explained, sobbing, throwing her arms around her son. "That's so sweet!"

"Can't breathe here, mom!" Freddie gasped.

Marissa released him.

"And it's not like I'm not going to visit you," Freddie told his mom. "I mean, I _do _come over twice a week at least as it is. And I'm sure Sam wouldn't completely mind you coming here occasionally. Provided you call first, right Sam?"

"Sure…come over any time," Sam said through her clenched teeth, making a mental note to pound Freddie for this second they were alone.

"I-Well, this place _is _closer to me than your old apartment was," Marissa sighed.

"There you go," Freddie smiled. He looked at his watch. "It's pretty late, mom. Why don't I walk you back down to your car."

Sam waited until Freddie and Mrs. Benson had left before she turned to Spencer. "Okay. Where the _heck _did you get all that from?"

"What? I can't say something intelligent from time to time?" Spencer asked indignantly. "I _am _and adult, might I remind you. I'm not just some big child who-Hey look! _Girly Cow's_ on!"

…

**I just want to say that my hearts and prayers are with everyone who suffered in anyway from the completely unthinkable events in Conneticut today. To think that so many young lives and the lives of the school's staff were lost today is just devastating. Tragedy's like this should never happen.**


	208. Chapter 208

_Male_

"Daddy, Emma put clay in my hair!" Freddie's five-year old daughter, Ashton cried, running into the kitchen where Freddie was sliding a frozen pizza out of the oven.

"Ash, there's like, a speck of clay in it," Freddie said, looking at his daughter's hair and quickly removing the clay. "No need to get worked up. And what are you and Emma doing playing with clay anyway? It's your bedtime!"

"We're not tired," Emma said, joining her father and sister in the kitchen. "Hey, are we having pizza? I want some!"

"It's not for you, sweetie," Freddie said. "It's for daddy and his friends."

"Uncle Spencer and Uncle Gibby?" Ashton asked.

"Yup," Freddie nodded, putting the pizza on a tray.

"Can we stay up with you guys?" Emma asked, following her dad into the living room, where Spencer, Gibby and T-Bo were sitting.

"No, it's too late for you guys," Freddie said, setting the food down. "Hey, Teebs. I didn't here you come in."

"Crazy lady at the smoothie was holding me up," T-Bo explained, helping himself to some potato chips. "Claimed there was a raspberry in her smoothie that looked like Ben Savage. She was trying to call the news people and everything!"

"Alright girls, I've tucked you in twice already," Freddie said, sitting down between Spencer and Gibby. "It's time for you to get into bed and stay there, otherwise when mommy gets back home, I'll have to tell her to not to make you those cookies you love that she was planning on making tomorrow."

Emma and Ashton gasped and quickly ran back upstairs to their rooms.

"So tell me again why we're hanging out here in the middle of kiddie town?" T-Bo asked.

"Because you guys didn't want to have our guy's night next week like I wanted," Freddie said.

"Sam couldn't watch the kids?" Gibby asked. "We could've gone to a nice restaurant or something. I hear La Amore has really good salmon."

"Dude, that's where you go on dates," Spencer pointed out.

"Yeah? And your point is?"

"Look, Sam really wanted to go to the movies with Carly," Freddie said. "She handles the kids all week; she deserves a break to get out of the house every once in awhile. And I, as her husband, am happy to watch the kids for one night so she can do so."

"She threatened the chiz out of you, didn't she?" Spencer asked knowingly.

"She told me if I didn't stay home with them, she'd sell my _Galaxy Wars _collectable lunchbox on the Internet," Freddie mumbled. "But hey, we can still have fun tonight. We're going to watch the _Celebrities Underwater _marathon, right? I hear Bob Saget's going to go against Ashley Olsen. It'll be a _Full House _reunion!"

"Man, I cannot _wait _to see that!" T-Bo said excitedly, grabbing the remote.

"Just keep the volume down, though, okay guys?" Freddie said, pulling a baby monitor out of his pocket and setting on the coffee table. "Tyler's just getting over a cold, so he's been a little fussy, and I need to hear if he starts to cry."

"You're kidding!" T-Bo said. "You can't watch retired actors almost drown without the volume blasting!"

"Yeah, it's just lame then," Spencer agreed.

"Guys, I'm sorry," Freddie said. "But this marathon's going to last all night. Sam should be back from the movies at eleven, so when she gets back we can move down to the basement and watch the last of it down there."

"Whatever," T-Bo said. "Let's at least watch wet celebrities at a _quiet _volume now. Oh hey look! Vana White's on!"

"Do you have to be a celebrity to be on this show?" Gibby asked.

"Um, the show _is _called **Cel**_**ebrities**__ Underwater_," Freddie pointed out.

"Yeah, but maybe they could do a special where normal people go on," Gibby said. "I think I could last pretty long on here. When I was a kid, I used to hold my breath underwater for almost three minutes."

"Well…that explains a lot," Spencer said. "Man, Vana's really giving Mr. T a run for his money. I think she just might win!"

"Wow, if she does, that will move her into third place!" Freddie said excitedly. "Right below Dennis Quaid and Bill Nye!"

"Dad?" Sam and Freddie's oldest son, Jason, said, walking into the room. "The Internet's down."

"Um, I'll fix it later, Jason," Freddie said, not taking his eyes off the screen. "Come on Vana, forty more seconds!"

"But dad, I need to get my Org into the Valley of Virtue fast, otherwise I'll never be War of Warlords champion," Jason said.

"Jason, don't you have to go to bed?" Freddie asked.

"It's eight thirty," Jason frowned.

"Well can't you do something other than play that game?" Freddie said. "Yes! Vana's moving onto the next round!"

"There's nothing else to do," Jason said. "You guys are hogging the T.V."

"Why don't you go play with that new chemistry set you got for Christmas?"

"Mom told me I'm grounded from that for the next month for dissolving her car keys with it," Jason reminded his father.

"Well if you don't tell her, I won't," Freddie said.

"Really? Sweet!" Jason said, running off to his room.

"Nice parenting, man," Spencer said.

"Eh, it'll be fine," Freddie said. "I told you. Our night of male bonding is still going to be great. Just because I'm babysitting, doesn't mean-"

"Daddy," Emma said, walking into the living room wearing one of Sam's old MMA shirts that hung down to her knees. "I can't fall asleep."

"That's probably because you aren't in bed," Freddie said.

"Look, they're adding electric eels to the tank now!" Gibby said.

"Whoa! There's no way Brittney Spears is going to beat Vanilla Ice now," Freddie said.

"Daddy!" Emma said, getting her father's attention again.

"Em, sweetie, just count sheep," Freddie said.

"I hate sheep."

"What? Sheep are awesome!" Spencer said. "They're one of my favorite farm animals."

"I'm hungry," Emma said, jumping up on Freddie's lap.

Freddie sighed. "Fine, take some pizza. But then you go right back to bed, understand?"

"Yes daddy," Emma said sweetly, grabbing a slice of pizza right from T-Bo's hand.

"Hey, that was mine!" T-Bo objected. "Freddie!"

"Dude, just let it go," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"I'm telling you, if I went on this show, I could win," Gibby said, setting down his can of Mountain Fizz on the coffee table. "And you know what I'd do with my winnings?"

"What?" Spencer asked.

"Buy myself a barber shop," Gibby said.

"What?" Freddie said. "What would you do with a barber shop? You can't cut hair."

"Look, sometimes it's just nice to have dreams, okay?" Gibby snapped. He looked down at the coffee table. "Okay. Who took my Mountain Fizz?"

"Who'd want to drink something with your DNA all over it?" T-Bo said.

"I'm serious, someone took my fizz!" Gibby said.

"You probably just finished it, Gib," Freddie said. "I don't have, neither does Spencer or-Ah! No!" He looked down at Emma, who was gulping down the Mountain Fizz as they spoke.

"Emma, you know you aren't supposed to be drinking soda at night," Freddie said, taking the can from her.

"I was thirsty, though," Emma said.

"Thanks a lot, Gib," Freddie moaned as Emma hopped off his lap.

"What did I do?" Gibby frowned.

"Left your soda unattended around a five-year old," Freddie said. "Now she's _never _going to sleep!"

"Hey, some kids aren't really affected by caffeine," Spencer told him. "So maybe it-"

But they were interrupted by Emma running over to the empty armchair and bouncing up and down in it.

"You were saying?" Freddie sighed. Just then a loud cry emitted from the baby monitor.

"Tyler's crying, daddy," Emma said, still bouncing up and down.

"Yes, Emma, I hear," Freddie said, bringing himself to his feet.

"Hey, maybe we should do this guy's night some other time," Spencer said.

"No! It'll be fine!" Freddie said quickly. "I'll just go get Tyler and we'll go back to watching the show. Watch Emma for a second."

Freddie hurried out of the room, leaving Spencer, Gibby and T-Bo with the bouncing child.

"Um, hey, Emma?" Gibby said. "You-You think you're going to stop bouncing anytime soon?"

"No way!" Emma said.

"Well, I tried," Gibby said.

"You did nothing!" Spencer said.

"Man, who would've thought a kid hopped up on sugar would be this bad," T-Bo said.

"Emma, you need to stop bouncing on the chair," Freddie said, coming back into the room with Tyler in his arms. "Come on. I know you're wide awake, but you really need to get to sleep and-"

"Hey, no fair! Emma gets to stay up?" Ashton said, coming downstairs. "Why don't I get to?"

"Because I'm daddy's favorite, right daddy?" Emma said.

"What?" Ashton exclaimed.

"No, no one's my favorite!" Freddie said quickly, setting Tyler down in his playpen and handing him a toy. He looked at the twins and held his hands up in defeat. "You know what? Neither of you is going to sleep anytime soon…just-just go play until your mom gets home."

"Yay!" both girls cheered, running out of the room.

"Wow, Sam's going to kill you," Gibby said.

"Yeah, well, what else is new?" Freddie said. "At least I can get a few hours of wet celebrities in before that-"

There was a loud explosion from upstairs.

"Dad?" Jason called down. "I think I made a hole in the floor!"

…

"What's up, nub?" Sam asked, walking back into the house, tossing her bag onto the floor. "Other nubs. You guys are _still _watching this?"

"Trying to," Gibby mumbled.

"What do you mean _trying _to?" Sam asked.

"Mommy!" Emma and Ashton exclaimed, running into the room to hug their mother.

"What are they still doing up? It's past eleven?" Sam frowned, glaring at Freddie. "They're going to be exhausted tomorrow!"

"Well, Ashton might be able to sleep now," Freddie said. "But, um, Emma chugged a can of Mountain Fizz, so she'll probably be up for awhile before she crashes."

"You gave her Mountain Fizz?" Sam frowned. "You're supposed to be the responsible one here, Fredward!"

"Gibby did it!"

"Hey, she just grabbed my can!" Gibby defended.

"Ash, go to bed," Sam sighed. "Emma…go run around the house and tire yourself out."

"Okay!" Emma said happily.

"Hey dad, I think I cleaned up most of the mess from the chemistry set," Jason said, coming downstairs. "But there's still-Oh, um, hi mom."

"Chemistry set?" Sam repeated. "You're grounded from that!"

"Dad told me I could use it, though."

"Well, we're just gonna head on out," Spencer said as him, T-Bo and Gibby got up. "See you tomorrow, Freddie, if you're still alive."

"Um, Jason, why don't you head to bed?" Freddie said. "Look, Sam, I know-"

"Don't worry about it, Fredbag," Sam sighed, collapsing onto the couch. "Thanks for watching them while I was out with Carly."

"Wait, you're not mad at me?" Freddie said, surprised.

"Nah, I know you were planning on spending all night with the guys," Sam said. "So I can't complain too much."

"Wow, Sam," Freddie smiled. "Thanks."

"Can I go play on the trampoline? Can I please? Can I?" Emma asked, running into the room. "Please, please, please?"

"But _you _get to handle her," Sam grinned, getting to her feet. "While _I _go to bed."

"Wait, Sam-" Freddie started.

"Night, Emma," Sam said, kissing the top of her daughter's head. "Don't go too hard on daddy, okay?"


	209. Chapter 209

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 173, where Sam accidently lets it slip to Carly that she still thinks Freddie is hot, and then tries to cover it up.**

…**..**

_Scenario _

"Morning, Puckett," Carly said as Sam dragged her feet downstairs. "Coffee?"

"Um, sure," Sam yawned.

"You want some cream? Sugar?" Carly asked. "I have natural and artificial."

"Okay, what's going on here?" Sam frowned, taking a mug of coffee from Carly. "You're being too chipper…even for you."

"Oh you know, some days I just wake up feeling extra chipper," Carly said. "Muffin?"

"Okay…" Sam said, accepting a blueberry muffin. "If you say so." She took a bit of the pastry. "Hey, so you think if I explain to the guy at the crab place the whole lobster situation, he'd let me back in there? Because I've had this craving for-"

"We need to talk about last night," Carly said.

"Ah-ha!" Sam said. "See, I new you had an ulterior motive behind this breakfast scheme of yours!"

"Come on, Sam, it's me," Carly said. "If you still have feelings for Freddie and are attracted to him, I'm the last person who would-"

"I told you, I _don't _have _any _feelings for Freddie!" Sam said firmly.

"Sam, you called him hot!"

"So what?" Sam exclaimed. "I told you that was just because I didn't want to have the reputation of a girl who dates unattractive guys! And anyway, you call every other guy in those magazines you read hot and you're not dating any of them, are you?"

"Oh if I could, I would be," Carly said. "But that's not the point; this is completely different!"

"I'm out of here, Carls," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I don't need this badgering at ten in the morning."

Carly quickly ran and stepped in front of the door so Sam couldn't leave.

"Sam, don't do this whole pushing everyone out thing," Carly said. "You're attracted to Freddie still; you admitted it last night. And it wasn't just to maintain your reputation or any of that chiz you've been saying. It's because you genuinely still have feelings for him."

Sam scoffed. "That's ridiculous."

"You know I'm right," Carly said, crossing her arms.

"You're crazy."

"Alright, Sam, just listen to this little scenario and answer me truthfully," Carly said. "If Freddie were to walk over here right now and tell you that he isn't over you and that he wants to give your relationship another try, what would you say?"

"I'd punch him in the face and take his wallet," Sam replied.

"You're lying," Carly said simply.

Sam stared at Carly, and Carly stared right back at her.

"Fine!" Sam finally conceded, throwing her hands up in defeat. "You really want to know what I'd say? I'd say yes, okay? You happy?"

"I am," Carly nodded. She pulled Sam into a hug. "And I'm sorry I was a little…edgy there."

"Yeah, well, good to know I'm finally rubbing off on you," Sam mumbled.

"So," Carly said softly as the girls pulled apart. "Um…how long have you wanted to get back together with Freddie?"

"Honestly…about ten minutes after we broke up," Sam sighed.

"Wow," Carly said gently.

Sam gave a small smile. "Yeah, well, it's not like that really matters. I think it's safe to say there's no chance of Freddie wanting me back."  
"You don't know-"

"Come on, Carls, we're right back to where we were years ago," Sam said. "Hating each other. Well…at least he is."

"But maybe-"

"Look, I get that as my best friend, it's your duty to say these things and give me hope and all," Sam said. "But I'm a big girl, Shay. I can handle the truth." She gave Carly a small smile. "Anyway, I think I'm gonna head back home now. My mom bought herself a new waxing machine yesterday, and I guess I should go make sure she hasn't burned down our house with it or something."

She turned and opened the door, only to reveal Freddie himself standing there with a fancy headset and microphone that he had been pressing against the door before Sam had swung it open.

Sam slowly turned to Carly. "I-You-You knew he was standing out here, didn't you?"

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "I did. I told him to listen at the door about five minutes before you woke up."

"And-And you heard all that?" Sam asked, turning back to Freddie.

"Um, yes," Freddie said.

Sam shook her head. "I can't believe this…move out of the way, Fredward-"

"Wait, Sam!" Freddie said, grabbing Sam's wrist as she tried to storm past him.

"What?" Sam snapped. "You heard everything. So go ahead; say it. Say how the first time was a mistake, and you'd never date me for a second time if your life depended on it. Say how I was such a bad girlfriend that only a completely desperate loser would consider having me as his girlfriend. Say that-"

"Why would I say any of that," Freddie cut her off. "When I know it's not true."

Sam rolled her eyes. "Yeah. Okay."

"I'm not kidding, Sam," Freddie said, stepping closer to her. "Dating you…it was anything but a mistake. It was fun and spontaneous and amazing. And I know I really don't have that many others to compare to, but you were by far the best girlfriend I've dated."

Sam glared at him. If he was just saying this…

"You-You said to Carly that if I asked you to try our relationship again, you'd say yes," Freddie continued. "So…is that still true? Do you want to try again?"

Sam looked from Carly, who was watching the scene anxiously, back to Freddie, whose chocolate brown eyes were making her weaker with each passing second.

"You mean everything you said to me?" she asked softly, her voice barely more than a whisper.

Freddie didn't respond. Instead he stepped even closer than he already was to her and answered her question by pressing his lips to hers.

"So," Freddie said when they pulled apart. "Is it a yes?"

Sam smiled at him. "I didn't push you away, did I?"

"Yes!" Carly exclaimed happily.  
Sam and Freddie turned to look at her.

"Sorry," Carly said. "It was just that this was just like watching a live romantic comedy happen before my eyes…I got a little too excited."


	210. Chapter 210

**AN-You guys really seem to like the idea of Sam and Freddie's daughter pairing off with Gibby's son. I got a lot of requests to do more with them, at least. More of them will be up later on. Hope you guys like this.**

…**.**

_Kidding_

"So I'm thinking of getting something new done to my hair," Carly said, flipping through a magazine as she sat at Sam and Freddie's kitchen counter.

"Um, like what?" Sam frowned.

"Oh, I dunno," Carly shrugged. "Maybe some bangs, or like, a few highlights. Or maybe-What are you doing?"

"Fredward hid my box of Fat Cakes that I used to have stashed in our bedroom," Sam said, opening the cabinets above the stove. "He said he was getting tired of having Fat Cake crumbs in the bed…Man, he'd better hope I find them soon, or else he's going to wake up tomorrow morning with itching powder in his boxers."

"Er, okay then," Carly said. "Hey, I'm sure Clarissa already asked Emma or Ashton this, but since we're still painting Clarissa's room, is it cool if she sleeps over here tonight."

"Yeah, sure," Sam nodded. "Hey, you think maybe Freddie hid my Fat Cakes in the garage? Maybe in the-"

Just then, the front door opened and Freddie and Sam's fifteen-year old twins and Carly's daughter walked into the house.

"Hey, how was school?" Carly asked as Ashton and Clarissa hung their jackets up by the door while Emma simply dropped hers on the floor.

"Good, I found out I'll be getting straight A's this semester," Ashton said happily.

"Nice work, kid," Sam said. "Hey, did you see your dad hiding a box of Fat Cakes anywhere?"

"Um, no?" Ashton frowned.

"What about you girls?" Carly asked Emma and Clarissa.

"Well, I found out I'm not failing anything this semester," Emma said, heading to the fridge.

"Good, because I can't deal with any more parent teacher conferences," Sam said.

"And I think I decided I want to do something new with my hair, mom," Clarissa said. "Maybe new bangs, or some highlights, or-"

"Oh my God, I was just talking about doing something like that with my hair!" Carly said excitedly. "We can go to the salon this weekend and get mother-daughter cuts together!"

"Yeah, that will be so much fun!" Clarissa grinned.

"Aren't I such a cool mom?" Carly said, turning to Sam.

"Yeah, you're just the coolest," Sam said.

"So what do you guys want to do tonight?" Ashton asked Emma and Clarissa, grabbing herself a pear from the fruit bowl on the counter.

"We could go see a movie," Clarissa suggested.

"Nah, there's nothing good playing," Emma said, biting into a Fat Cake.

"Hey, hey, hey!" Sam said. "Emma, where'd you get that Fat Cake?"

"There's a whole box of them under the sink," Emma replied.

"Under the sink…" Sam mumbled, quickly pulling the cabinet under the sink open and pulling out the box of her beloved snack. "Nice try, Fredbat. Can't keep Mama from her food."

"What about the mall?" Ashton asked.

"The good sales don't start until Sunday," Clarissa pointed out.

"Yeah, and I'm sick of hanging out at the mall," Emma added. "You two always make me spend an hour in Glitter Gloss. Why don't we do something _fun _for a change? I know! Let's go to the Go Kart track!"

"But that place is so expensive," Ashton said. "I'm trying to save up for that new purse I've had my eye on…unless someone wants to give me an advance on my allowance-"

"Nice try, Ash," Sam said, stuffing half a Fat Cake in her mouth at once.

"Actually, you get a discount if you go in a group of four or more," Clarissa said.

"There you go, it's all set then," Emma said.

"Emma, I know you got a C in math," Ashton said, rolling her eyes at her twin. "But in case you didn't realize, there's one, two, _three _of us. Not four."

"Ugh, fine, call up Quincy and tell him to get his nubbish butt to the track with us," Emma said.

"Quincy's not going to want to spend his night with us," Clarissa grinned.

"I know," Ashton giggled.

"Why? It's not like he has anything better to do," Emma frowned.

"Wait, are you serious?" Ashton asked. "You really don't know?"

"Know what?"

"Quincy's going out with Leah Armallie now," Clarissa explained.

Emma nearly choked on her Fat Cake. "What? Since _when_?"

"Since after lunch today, right before fifth period," Ashton said. "Weren't you listening to him at lunch?"

"No! I thought he was just droning on about something stupid like he always does!"

"Well he was saying how he was going to ask her out," Aston told her.

"So-So you're telling me," Emma said. "That Leah Armallie, head cheerleader and pretty much the most popular girl in our school, actually agreed to go out with-with _Quincy Gibson_? You've _got _to be kidding me."

"Wow, guess he takes after Gibby," Carly chuckled.

"What do you mean?" Clarissa asked.

"When we were in school, for some reason, all the really pretty girls seemed to fall for Gibby," Carly explained. "We never did figure out why."

"There's _got _to be something wrong Leah," Emma said, shaking her head. "Maybe all that hair dye finally seeped in through her skull and started affecting her brain."

"Why are you freaking out about this so much?" Ashton asked.

"I am _not _freaking out about it!" Emma snapped. "I'm just…concerned about the chemicals that must be going into hair dye now days. Clarissa, if you get highlights, make sure you read all the warning labels. Apparently one of the side affects is now terrible judgment of guys!"

She threw her Fat Cake down and stormed upstairs, slamming her bedroom door shut a moment later.

"O_kay _then," Ashton said, shaking her head. "I'm gonna go do my nails. Clarissa, you have to see this new shade of blue I got. It really goes with that dress I bought last week."

"Cool," Clarissa grinned as her and Ashton headed out of the kitchen.

"Wow, I guess it's something in the Gibson blood," Carly said. "I would've never thought Quincy could date a head cheerleader. I mean, no offense to the kid, but he doesn't really seem like the kind of guy who could get a girl like that to go out with him."

"No," Sam agreed. She looked at Emma's half-eaten Fat Cake lying on the floor. Even though the others hadn't seen it, she couldn't remember her daughter ever looking so…hurt.

….

"Oh man, would you look at that new Pear Pad," Freddie said, sitting on his and Sam's bed, looking at his laptop screen.

"How's it any different from the old one?" Sam asked, looking over his shoulder at his laptop.

"The screen's fifteen percent bigger!" Freddie said. "Plus it has a slightly faster download time for apps. Maybe I'll pick myself up one…"

"Wow, the Pear Company must make a killing from tech-obsessed dorks like you," Sam said.

"Ha, ha," Freddie said. He closed his laptop. "So, what are the kids doing tonight?"

"Tyler's sleeping over at a friend's," Sam said. "And since the girls couldn't think of anything to do tonight, they're just hanging out here with Clarissa. Hey, just so you know, Emma's in a bit of a _mood_."  
"What else is new with her?" Freddie pointed out.

"No, it's not her usual mood," Sam said. "Quincy apparently just started going out with this preppy cheerleader from school today."

"Really? Kid takes after Gibby," Freddie said.

"Yeah, I know," Sam said.

"Wait…what's that have to do with Emma?" Freddie asked.

Sam frowned. "Are you serious? Jeez, Freddie, for such a smart guy, you're an _idiot_." She shook her head and headed out of the bedroom.

"Did I miss something?" Freddie frowned, following Sam out of the room.

They headed down to the living room, where their twins and Clarissa were sitting on the couch watching old episodes of _America Sings_. Ashton and Clarissa were laughing at the terrible auditions, while Emma sat with her arms crossed, glaring at the television screen.

"Hey, I'm gonna pop some popcorn, you guys want any?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah, thanks," Ashton nodded.

"We have the cheddar kind, just like you like, Em," Freddie said to Emma.

"I don't want any stupid popcorn!" Emma snapped.

"I told you," Sam whispered to her husband.

"Well what did _I _do?" Freddie mumbled.

Just then, there was a knock at the door.

"I'll get it," Freddie said. He headed to the front door and opened it to reveal Quincy.

"Hey, Quincy," Freddie greeted the teenager.

"Hey," Quincy replied. "Um, is it cool if I hang out here tonight?"

"Oh, um, sure," Freddie nodded, letting Quincy into the house.

"Thanks," Quincy said, he headed into the living room.

"Quincy?" Ashton said as he walked in. "Why are you here? I thought you would be hanging out with Leah?"

"Yeah, shouldn't you be out smooching little miss pom-poms?" Emma mumbled.

"Well, it turns out Leah agreed to go out with me because she just needed a guy to make her ex-boyfriend jealous," Quincy said, sitting down on the couch.

"Oh, Quince; that's awful!" Clarissa said, patting his back comfortingly. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I guess," Quincy shrugged. "I mean, I don't know what I was thinking…girls like Leah don't go for guys like me."

"Well, duh," Emma said.

"Emma!" Ashton hissed.

"What?" Emma said. "Oh hey, popcorn!"

"I thought you didn't want any," Sam said, setting the bowl down on the coffee table.

"Yeah, well now I do," Emma shrugged.

"I guess I should call my parents and tell them I'm here," Quincy said, pulling out his phone.

"Eh, I'll do it," Sam said. "I need to call your dad anyway and tell him to give me back my foot massager before I go over there and break it over his head…"

"Great, so you're going to hang out here all night?" Emma said. "Just when I thought I'd be getting a nub-free evening…"

But just as Sam was leaving the room, she saw Emma give a small smile when Quincy had turned his head.

…..

Later that night, after Sam and Freddie had gone up to bed, the four teenagers were still sitting on the couch. _America Sings _had ended, and they were now watching re-runs of _The Brady Bunch_. Or rather, Emma and Quincy were; Ashton and Clarissa had fallen asleep about an hour ago.

"You know, I've always thought that Alice chick was pretty suspicious," Emma said. "I mean, she's probably some undercover ninja or something…"

She turned to Quincy who was looking at the screen with a glum expression on his face.

Emma rolled her eyes. "Okay, Quincy. If you're going to be here, could you at least be mildly entertaining? So you don't get to date the pretty cheerleader. Get over it."

"Easy for you to say…" Quincy mumbled.

Emma sighed. "Dude…why'd you think it would work out anyway?"

"I know, I know, she's the most popular girl in school, and I'm well, not so popular," Quincy said. "I should've known she didn't really want to go out with me."

"No," Emma said. "I mean…why would _you_ want to go out with _her_?"

Quincy frowned. "What?"

"Leah's the meanest girl in the whole school," Emma said. "And she treats every guy she dates like her little personal servants. No guy, even someone like _you_, deserves to date someone like her."

Quincy smiled a little. "Yeah…I guess I wasn't really attracted to her, now that I think of it."

"Then why the heck did you ask her out?" Emma asked.

"Well…because," Quincy said. "I was sick of being single. I mean, Ashton has that Neil guy she's been dating for awhile, Clarissa always goes out on dates…you had Chase."

"Yeah, _had_," Emma nodded. "We broke up ages ago; after I realized he was a total jerk, remember?"

"I know," Quincy said. "But the point is, you've been on dates before. I was just sick of being the only one in our group who wasn't doing any dating. So I thought, why not take a chance."

"So you picked Leah Armallie?"

"Hey, I said I was taking a chance," Quincy grinned. "I figured why not take a big chance."

"Man, you must've been _really _desperate," Emma said.

"Yeah," Quincy sighed. "And for those twenty minutes on our date, before I found out she was using me, I was totally miserable. I mean, all she did was go on about how pretty she thought she was…Oh well. Looks like I'll just spend the rest of my teenage years alone."

Emma looked over at Clarissa and Ashton to make sure they were asleep, and then she took a deep breath. "No, you won't. I mean, I know you're a total nub and everything, and have like, the coolness level of a frog-"

"Gee, thanks," Quincy said.

"-But eventually you'll find some girl out of her mind enough to actually fall for all that," Emma finished.

"Think so?"

Emma nodded. "Uh-huh. And I'm sure she'll be a lot better than Leah Armallie. I mean, like I said, she'll probably be completely insane, but she still exists."

"I hope so," Quincy said.

"Hey," Emma said, smiling as she picked up her laptop from the coffee table. "I have an idea."

"Please tell me it doesn't involve goats this time," Quincy said.

"No, relax," Emma said. "When me and Chase broke up, I got back at him by uploading a bunch of embarrassing pictures of him onto the Internet. Got any bad pics of Leah?"

"No," Quincy replied.

"Eh, that's okay," Emma shrugged. "We'll get some from her Splashface page…Photoshop is a wonderful thing."


	211. Chapter 211

_Adult_

"So then we spent the entire day on the beach," Carly said, smiling as she sat on Sam and Freddie's couch. "And he rubbed sunblock on me, and we just sat and watched the ocean…it was so romantic."

"Sounds fun," Sam said absentmindedly, trying to untangle a pair of her four-year old daughter's shoelaces. "Man, what did this kid _do_ to these things?"

"Alright," Freddie said, walking into the room with his and Sam's newborn, Tyler. "I've made enough formula for the rest of the day, helped Jason with his homework, and successfully kept the twins from building a sandcastle inside." He sat down next to Sam and handed her the infant. "_Man_ am I tired."

"Why, I'm the one who got up four times last night to take care of Tyler," Sam yawned.

"Hey, you guys, isn't your anniversary coming up?" Carly asked.

"Yeah, next week," Freddie nodded.

"Wow, ten years," Carly said. "That's really something. So, what are you guys going to do?"

"Let's see, we have four kids under ten," Sam said. "I'm thinking we'll just be staying in and wiping somebody's vomit off of something."

"Gross," Carly cringed. "That's not romantic in the slightest."

"Well, we don't really have time to do anything just the two of us anymore," Freddie said. "You know, once you have kids, you can't just get away."

"That's ridiculous, I've still managed to keep the romance in _my _marriage even after Clarissa," Carly pointed out. "Like I was just telling Sam, we went to this really nice beach house this weekend, just the two of us."

"You have _one _kid, Carls," Sam reminded her best friend. "The closest thing to that we've gotten to do with our four is that trip we took Eight Banners last month."

"Yeah, and seeing as we were in one tiny hotel room," Freddie nodded. "There really wasn't much time for…adult stuff."

"Um, gross," Carly cringed. "How many times do I have to tell you? You two are my best friends. No matter how long you guys have been married, I do _not _want to hear about that."

"Well you're the one badgering us because we're not doing anything special for our anniversary," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"I know, I know," Carly said. "But you guys need to do _something_ for your anniversary…Ten years is a _huge _deal."

"We can always do something big for our twentieth," Freddie said. "By that time, the kids should be old enough to leave home for one weekend while we go away."

"So you're going to wait ten years?" Carly frowned. "No, that's crazy. You know what? How about I stay with the kids and you guys go and have the weekend to yourselves?"

"Come on, Carls," Sam chuckled. "That's nice and all, but you couldn't handle watching Clarissa _plus _these four."

"Sure I could," Carly said. "It would be fun!"

"You really think you could handle a three-month old baby, two four year-olds and an eight year old?" Freddie asked.

"You make it sound like I'm going to be watching an entire preschool or something," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

Freddie looked at Sam. "You know? It _is _our ten-year anniversary. I'd actually sort of like to get away…just the two of us."

"A whole weekend without any crying, diapers, or kids jumping on us?" Sam grinned. "I think I could go for that."

"So what do you think?" Carly asked. "Will you do it?"

"Okay," Sam nodded. "_But _you have to promise to call us the second you get overwhelmed."

"Don't worry about me, you guys," Carly said. "Just go start planning your trip! The kids and I will have a blast."

…..

"Mmm, what time is it?" Sam yawned, sitting up in the bed in her and Freddie's hotel room.

"A little after one," Freddie replied, closing his Pearbook that he had been working on. He sat down on the edge of the bed and gave his wife a deep kiss.

"I'd say good morning," he grinned when they pulled away. "But it's a little late for that, isn't it?"

"I can't believe I actually got to sleep in," Sam said. "I haven't slept in past eight in _ages_."

"I know," Freddie laughed. "And this morning, when I was brushing my teeth, I didn't have to hear any of the kids in there fighting over who got the last of the Chocolate Nut Crunch. I could actually hear myself brushing my teeth!"

"Okay, that's a little weird," Sam said, rolling her eyes. She pushed the covers off and got herself up out of the bed. "You know, since I actually got a good twelve hours of sleep, today might actually be a pretty good day."

"Hey, last night was a pretty good night, too," Freddie smirked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, it was," Sam laughed. She put her arms around his neck and gave him another kiss. "Happy anniversary, nub."

"Happy anniversary, baby," Freddie smiled. "So, now that you're up, what do you want to do? There's a nice park nearby, we could go have a romantic picnic. Or we could go lounge by the pool, or go to a fancy restaurant. Whatever you want."

"Well…" Sam said thoughtfully. "When was the last time we actually had peace and quiet and time in a room just to ourselves?"

"Probably not since Jason was three," Freddie said. "Why?"

"Well, this may sound crazy, but why don't we just stay in?" Sam said. "You know, hang out in bed all day watching pay-per-view movies and ordering room service?"

"You know what, Sam?" Freddie said. "That sounds like the best idea I've heard in awhile."

"Good, that means I don't have to change," Sam said, falling back down onto the bed.

"Hey," Freddie chuckled, looking at his old t-shirt that Sam was wearing as he settled himself down next to his wife. "I think you look _very _good in that."

…

"We're back!" Sam said loudly, dropping her bag as her and Freddie walked into their house.

"Mommy! Daddy!" Ashton cried, running over to her parents and giving them both hugs. She was followed shortly by Emma and Jason.

"Hey, so did you guys have fun with Aunt Carly?" Freddie asked as he picked up Emma and Ashton.

"Yeah, she let me play with my remote control car and have _two _scoops of ice cream," Jason nodded.

"We made you guys an anversrey card," Ashton said, handing Sam a large piece of construction paper.

"_Anniversary, _sweetie," Sam said, looking at the card. "Wow…I see you guys used every bit of glitter you could find."

"That was my idea," Emma said proudly.

"So, where _is _your Aunt Carly?" Freddie asked, setting the girls down.

"I'm here, I'm here," Carly said, hurrying over with Tyler. "Welcome back. Did you have fun?"

"Yeah, it was great," Sam nodded, taking Tyler from her.

"So what'd you do?" Carly asked. "Did you go on a tour of the salt mines there? Did you go see one of the plays in that cute little theater across from the hotel? Oh! I bet you went to that nice white sand beach over there."

"Actually, we never left the hotel room," Freddie said.

"What?" Carly frowned.

"It was just so…_quiet_," Sam said. "So we pretty much just hung around watching movies, sleeping, ordering room service…it was really relaxing. Our best anniversary yet."

"Well, I guess as long as you two had fun," Carly sighed.

"So you were okay with the kids?" Freddie asked. "You look a little…tired."

"Oh, everything was fine," Carly nodded. "Sure, Tyler woke me up every three hours at night, the twins felt the need to use my pear phone and call China and Jason flooded the bathtub, but I handled everything."

"Thanks again, Carls," Sam said. "You have no idea how much we needed this weekend. If you ever want to get away, you know we'll watch Clarissa for you."

"Aw, thanks you guys," Carly smiled.

"Well, I should go feed this little guy," Sam said, shifting Tyler in her arms.

"Yeah, and I need to get some club soda to try and get this stain off of here," Freddie said, pointing to a spot of ketchup of his shirt. "Sam slammed on the brakes just as I was biting into my burger."

"Um, you guys, before you head into the kitchen-" Carly started as she followed Sam and Freddie.

"What happened in here?" Sam frowned, stopping right outside her kitchen, which was covered in so many different splatters it looked as though something had blown up.

"Um, well, you see, Emma and Ashton thought they'd make you guys a little anniversary cake at around four this morning," Carly explained. "And, well, I guess they spilled the batter a few times. And then Jason came in and thought it would be better to make you guys brownies, which caused them to get into a big fight, more batter was spewed…And well, this was the result. I started to clean it up, but then Tyler needed feeding, and then the kids wanted to go out for waffles-"

"Hey, don't sweat it," Freddie told her.

"Yeah, believe it or not, with these kids, this is actually a mild mess," Sam said.

"_Really_?" Carly frowned.

"Told you, having four kids is a lot different from having just one," Sam grinned.

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "Big time. I mean, you know I love your kids like they were my own, but they are a _handful_."

"We know," Freddie said. "Trust us."


	212. Chapter 212

_Attach_

"Ugh, here it is, Friday night," Carly Shay sighed, leaning back on the sofa in her and Spencer's living room. "And I have nothing to do."

"Can't you call up Gibby?" Sam asked, running a brush through her hair, sitting down next to her best friend. "Hang out with him tonight."

"I can't, he's at some cat fair," Carly said.

"Hey, if you're bored tonight," Spencer said, walking out of his room. "Why don't you help me sort out my fork collection?"

"Oh, see? _This _is what my life's become," Carly moaned.

"Well, me and Freddie should be back from our date at around eleven," Sam said. "We'll come back here and we'll hang out together and watch a movie or something."

"No, don't worry about me," Carly said. "I don't want to rush your date." She picked up one of her fashion magazines from the coffee table. "Man. I _really _need to get me a boyfriend."

"Come on, Carls," Sam said. "Having a boyfriend's not that big of a deal."

"You know which girls say that?" Carly said. "The ones who already _have _boyfriends! I mean, you and Freddie are just like, the perfect couple; you're practically attached at the hip! I just want someone like that for me so I can spend my Friday nights with him instead of being stuck here, helping Spencer sort out his forks."

"Hey! It's a very entertaining task!" Spencer defended.

"Hey, hey," Freddie said, opening the front door of the apartment and letting himself in. "Wow, Sam. You look hot in that dress."

"I know," Sam grinned, getting up to greet her boyfriend.

"You see?" Carly said as Sam gave him a quick kiss. "Perfect couple."

"What's going on?" Freddie asked Sam.

"Carly wants a boyfriend," Sam sighed.

"And Carly's going to get one if it's the last thing she does," Carly said.

"Didn't you go on a date last week?" Freddie pointed out.

"Well, yeah, but that guy was a total dud," Carly pointed out. "He kept droning on about how the armpit hair on his left side was longer than the right the entire date."

"Gross," Freddie cringed.

"Whoa, that's pretty weird," Sam said. "Did you get pictures?"

"No, I didn't take pictures of his lopsided armpit hair!" Carly said.

"Look, Carly," Sam said. "It's not like you spend every Friday night alone."

"I know," Carly sighed. "But lately, whenever I see you guys all…coupled up, it makes me realize how happy you are, and I really do want to find someone like that for me."

"And you will," Freddie told her.

"Yeah, yeah," Carly said, looking back down at her magazine. "But I still-Hey! This is it!"

"What's it?" Sam asked.

"According to this magazine, guys really love outdoorsy girls," Carly explained, pointing to a page in her magazine. "So to get a guys attention, all I have to is become outdoorsy!"

"Um, Carly no offense or anything, but you're the _least _outdoorsy girl I know," Sam said.

"Yeah, Freddie agreed. "I mean, you're the one who wore brand new boots on that nature retreat we went on in school last year."

"They were _cute_," Carly defended. "And I can totally become outdoorsy if I wanted to. You know what? Why don't we all go on a hike tomorrow?"

"A hike?" Sam repeated.

"Sure," Carly nodded. "It'll be fun. We'll get Gibby, you guys can come…Spencer probably doesn't have anything better going on."

"Hey! Don't make assumptions!" Spencer said loudly, looking up from the forks her was sorting.

"Well, do you?" Carly asked.

"No," Spencer mumbled.

"Carly, you don't think you're being a little, oh, I don't know, crazy?" Sam asked.

"No," Carly replied. "And this could be the new hobby we were looking for!"

"I wasn't looking for any hobby," Sam said.

"Yeah, me nei-" Freddie began.

"Oh come on, guys, do you want me to stay alone and miserable forever?" Carly pouted.

Freddie sighed and looked at Sam. "She's not going to be dropping this anytime soon."

"Fine," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "We'll do your little hiking trip."

"Cool," Carly said happily. "I'd better go start planning my outfit then. Have fun on your date, you two!"

"Oh yeah," Sam said as Carly hurried upstairs. "She's really nailing this outdoorsy thing."

…..

"Okay, map, check. Water bottles, check. Bug repellant-"

"Spencer, I told you to have everything packed last night!" Carly said, walking downstairs and spotting her brother packing up his backpack.

"Sorry, I got caught up in my online solitaire tournament," Spencer yawned. "But I'm all ready now."

The front door opened and Gibby and Freddie walked in with their bags.

"Hey, you guys excited for our hiking trip?" Carly smiled.

"Yeah, I've been meaning to go hiking ever since I was a boy scout," Gibby said.

"_You _were a boy scout?" Freddie frowned.

"Uh-huh, up until I got kicked out for taking my shirt off at a flag ceremony," Gibby said. "I never got a change to earn my hiking merit badge, so today I'm gonna get it."

"Where's Sam?" Carly asked. "I told her to be here by ten."

"Well, she probably woke up only fifteen minutes ago," Freddie said, looking at his watch.

Right on cue, the door opened again and Sam, yawning, walked in.

"_Why _do we have to do this so early in the morning?" Sam moaned, dropping her bag and falling back onto the sofa. "I should still be sleeping for another three hours."

"Alright, now that we're all here," Carly said, ignoring Sam's complaints as she picked up her own bag. "Let's head out and make me outdoorsy so I can find a dude!"

"Come on," Freddie said, extending a hand to his girlfriend as Carly hurried out the door.

"Any chance of you carrying me during this hike so I can get some more sleep?" Sam asked.

"It won't be that bad," Freddie told her as she got to her feet.

"We're hiking up a huge path in the morning," Sam said. "How can that not be that bad?"

"Well, after we're done, you and I can go hang out at my place," Freddie whispered. "My mom left earlier this morning to visit her sister…"

"Sounds like a date, Fredbag," Sam said, showing a small smile.

…..

"Ugh, how much further?" Spencer panted, dragging his feet up the path.

"We've only gone a tenth of a mile," Freddie pointed out.

"So how much further?" Spencer asked again.

"Well, this trail's about twelve miles-"

"Twelve miles?" Spencer exclaimed. "That's-that's the furthest I've ever gone on my feet my whole life!"

"Where are all the boys?" Carly frowned, looking around. "There supposed to be here admiring my outdoorsiness!"

"I don't think that's a word," Sam pointed out. "Besides, every sane person's probably asleep."

"Baby, it's not _that _early," Freddie said.

"Hey, do you think there's any chance of us seeing some wildlife?" Gibby asked.

"Probably; there's supposed to be deer on this trail," Freddie said. "And some species of robins, and-"

"No, not wildlife like that," Gibby said. "I mean _interesting _wildlife. Like antelope and those giant tortoises."

"Dude, what would an antelope be doing in Seattle?" Sam asked.

"I dunno, galloping," Gibby shrugged.

"Well, can we at least stop for a water break before we go any further?" Spencer asked, sitting himself down on a large rock. He pulled out a large bottle of water.

"Okay, but make it quick," Carly said. "Maybe the cute boys are further along the trail…"

"According to this map on my pearphone," Freddie said, pulling out his phone. "We need to make a left when we get to the-"

"Ah!" Spencer cried, spitting out his drink. "That's not water!"  
"Then what is it?" Gibby frowned.

"You don't want to know," Spencer said, pulling a tissue out from his pocket and furiously scrubbing his tongue with it.

"Can we just hurry up and get to the end of this trail?" Sam asked. "The sooner we finish, the sooner I can go take a nap."

"Fine," Spencer said, getting to his feet. "But does anybody happen to have any mouthwash in their bag?"

….

The five continued to hike up the trail, which as it progressed, got increasingly difficult to manage.

"We _have _to be close to the end now," Carly panted, wiping her sweaty forehead with the sleeve of her shirt. The hike had certainly taken its toll on her; her hair was knotty and out of control, her face was sunburnt and sweat stained and her jeans had a giant rip in one knee from the time she had tripped.

"We're not even at six miles yet," Freddie told them, looking at the pace keeper he had on her phone.

"What? But we've been hiking for hours!" Spencer exclaimed. "How do people actually find this enjoyable?"

"I know," Freddie agreed.

"Hey, I feel fine," Gibby said. "If my boy scout troop could see me now…"

"See, this is why we should've never gone hiking," Sam said, leaning against a tree. "We belong indoors with the Internet, completely blocked out from the outside world like any normal American."

"Maybe you're right," Carly sighed. "I mean, we haven't seen one hot guy this whole time…and at this point, even if we do, I look so disgusting I'd probably scare him away."

"I'd say," Spencer agreed.

"So why don't we just head back to the car," Carly continued, shooting her brother a glare. "So I can go home and take a nice bubble bath and paint my now-chipped nails."

"Thank you," Sam sighed, relieved.

"Hey, Sam!" Freddie suddenly yelled, looking at the tree she was leaning on. "Get away from that tree!"

"Cool your pus, Fredward," Sam said, stepping away from that tree. "Why are you so-"

"That tree's covered in poison ivy, Sam!" Freddie said, taking a closer look at the three-leaved plant that covered the trunk of the tree Sam had previously been resting against.

"What?" Sam exclaimed. She looked down at her bare arms, where red sloshes were already starting to appear. She could feeling her skin beginning to itch all over too.

"Hey, I had poison ivy once," Gibby said as Carly, Freddie and Spencer hurried over to Sam. "It was actually pretty fun."

"Fun?" Sam snapped. "How is being covered in gross itchy blobs fun?"

"Because, my mom gave me oatmeal baths," Gibby said, smiling at the memory. "And when I was done, she let me eat the leftover oatmeal. It was like taking a bath in a giant breakfast bowl!"

"You're really lucky I'm too busy to punch you right now," Sam muttered as she began scratching her arms and legs.

"Baby, don't scratch," Freddie told her. "Come on, we'll stop at a drugstore and get you some lotion."

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "Hopefully going back won't be as hard as getting up here was…"

….

The iCarly gang finally managed to get themselves back to civilization and back to Bushwell Plaza. They returned to the Shay's apartment, Sam still covered with pink sloshes that she was trying hard not to scratch.

"Sam, just don't think about the itch," Carly told her as Freddie helped her over to the couch.

"How can I not think about it?" Sam moaned.

"Just think about…meat," Freddie told her, taking the cap off of the lotion they had picked up on the way home. He began to rub it on her arms.

"Meat?" Sam repeated.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded, still rubbing lotion on her. "After we finish here, we'll go back to my place and I'll get you anything from that ten minute delivery deli that you love so much."

"Even the triple ham slam sandwich?" Sam asked.

"I'll get you two," Freddie smiled, leaning over to give her a kiss.

"Aw," Carly smiled, watching her best friends. "See, this is what I mean? You guys are just the perfect couple."


	213. Chapter 213

_Evening_

"Alright, we've got a fire going in the fireplace," Freddie said, dimming the lights of his and Sam's house. "Romantic music, a lovely dinner prepared by the nice people at the Cheesecake Warehouse…I think we're all set for a perfect Valentines Day, don't you?"

"Looks like it," Sam nodded. "Wow baby, you really went all out. You have candles and everything."

"Hey, this is our first Valentines Day as a married couple," Freddie smiled. "You didn't think I'd miss the chance to go all out, did you?"

"Nah, you'd never pass up any opportunity to be a sappy nub," Sam laughed, giving her husband a kiss.

"So," Freddie said when they pulled apart after a moment. "Shall we start on our dinner? It's all set on the table?"

"Maybe we could wait just a _little _longer for dinner," Sam smiled, pulling Freddie over to the sofa.

"Wow, is Sam Puckett postponing food just to make-out with me?" Freddie chuckled as the couple sat down. "I must be a pretty good kisser."

"Don't get cocky," Sam said. "But, that may not be _completely _untrue…" She wrapped her arms around his neck as he pulled her closer to him, their lips pressed firmly against the others.

"Freddie!" came a sudden voice from the front door of the house. "Freddie, are you home?"

"What is your _mother _doing here on Valentines Day?" Sam hissed.

"I don't know! I didn't invite her!" Freddie replied.

"Oh, here you are," Marissa said, walking into the living room. "And what is this fireplace doing on? You could burn the whole house down!"

"Mom, the point of having a fireplace is to use it for fires," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "And what are you doing here? It's Valentines Day."

"Yes, Valentines Day," Marissa nodded. "The day to spend with your loved ones. And I believe a son falls under that category. And well, since Samantha is here too…"

"Ugh, can't you just bug Freddie tomorrow?" Sam moaned.

"She means," Freddie said, giving his wife a warning look. "That tonight we kind of planned to spend the evening together…just the two of us. You know, since it's our first Valentines Day together since we've been married."

"And you _are _together, isn't that…nice," Marissa said, sitting herself down between the two of them. "And now that I've put out that dangerous fire you had going, why don't we enjoy this DVD boxed set of _Family Ties_ I found at the vintage video store?"

"Dude, _do something_," Sam said to Freddie as Marissa got up and headed over to the T.V.

"Um, mom. Don't you have anything else you'd rather be doing?" Freddie asked. "Why don't you go and update your Aggressive Parenting website?"

"Don't worry, I've already taken care of that," his mother replied. She looked over at the kitchen table, where the food the couple had ordered to go from the Cheesecake Warehouse was sitting. "Is this food your _dinner_?"

"Um, yes?" Sam nodded. "What's wrong with it?"

"_Please _tell me this is not fast food," Marissa said, cringing.

"No, we got it from the Cheesecake Warehouse," Freddie said.

"Well this won't do at all," Marissa said, picking up the plates and heading to the garbage can. "That restaurant's portions are so big that you'll be getting triple your daily allowances of fat and cholesterol. You remember what I've always said, Freddie; a nice healthy dinner makes you healthy and thinner." And with that she dumped the food into the trash.

"Hey!" Sam exclaimed, running over and looking at her chicken sadly.

"I'll just whip us up a nutritious meal," Marissa said, getting herself a pan. "Samantha, where do you keep the baby greens in your kitchen?"

"I'll tell you where I'll be keeping my fist in a minute," Sam muttered under her breath.

"Um, we have some vegetables in the fridge, mom," Freddie said quickly. "So you just start cooking and Sam and I will wait patiently for it in the other room."

"Freddie!" Sam exclaimed as Freddie pulled her out of the kitchen. "Why are you encouraging her?"

"Look," Freddie said. "You know my mom…she's _probably _not going to leave here until we've forced down whatever it is that she's cooking in there."

"But what-"

"So," Freddie continued. "We might as well make the most of the night; even if my mom's ruined it."

"And how are we supposed to do that?" Sam asked.

"Well," Freddie said, smiling seductively. "While my mom's in there cooking, we could be in here…"

"Hmm," Sam said, stepping closer to Freddie. "Aren't you sneaky?"

But no sooner had the two began kissing did Marissa reappear in the room.

"Alright, while the dinner's cooking, how about we play a little game?"

"You're done in there _already_?" Freddie frowned.

"Yes, and in forty-five minutes we will be enjoying a nice squash and cucumber casserole," Marissa said.

"We didn't have any squash," Sam pointed out.

"I used my purse squash, dummy," Marissa said. "Now then, I have a travel size game of tidily winks and a deck of cards for us to play Old Maid. _Or_ if you two aren't up for any games, we could watch the video of Freddie's birth I just put on my phone."

"No one wants to see that," Sam said. "And I mean _no one_."

"Well then I'll go set up tidily winks," Marissa said. "But everyone needs to go get a pair of gloves before we start."

"_Why_?" Freddie moaned.

"Because you might cut your fingers on one of the chips and get an infection," Marissa explained.

…..

After a less-than romantic dinner with Marissa and a round of 1960 show tunes, Sam and Freddie were beginning to feel as if they'd never salvage the rest of their Valentines Day.

"Oh my, it's already nine-thirty," Marissa said, looking at her watch as the three finished up their fifth round of Go Fish. "I'd better get going. I trust you two probably want to get to bed, too. It seems like we just played the night away, didn't we? Well, at least we had a good time."

"Yeah, this was a real blast," Sam said, her voice dripping in sarcasm.

"Okay, well, bye mom," Freddie said, quickly tossing his mother her coat. "Drive safe."

The second the door slammed behind her, Sam and Freddie were at each other's side.

"Well," Freddie said. "My mom threw away our dinner, took away the rest of our firewood, replaced our music with her soothing relaxation tape…looks like this isn't going to be the romantic evening we planned, huh?"

"Nope," Sam agreed. She rested her head on Freddie's shoulder. "Happy Valentines Day, though, baby."

"Happy Valentines Day to you too, Sam," Freddie said, giving her a kiss on the top of her head.

"You know," Sam said, looking up at Freddie. "It's not like we don't have _anything _left to do…"

"What? You really want to watch those _Family Ties_ DVDs my mom left here?"

"Huh? No!" Sam said. She stood on her toes and whispered something in Freddie's ear.

"Oh!" Freddie said, his eyes widening. "Well shoosh yeah I'm down for that!"

"Good," Sam smiled. "Because we have a lot to make up for thanks to your mom."


	214. Chapter 214

**AN-Obviously takes place before the Seddie arc ****. Hope you like it!**

…

_Boost_

"Alright, so tonight we can finish shooting the Random Dialing bit," Freddie said, typing in a few things on his Pearpad. "And then I can edit in the sound effects into it…Sam, I need to get your remote so I can add the right effects onto that too. And then we need to-Hey!"

"Sorry, you were boring me," Sam shrugged as Freddie wiped away the glob of smoothie from his face that Sam had just spat at him through her straw.

"Sam, we've been over this," Carly sighed. "You can't just throw smoothie at people who are boring you."  
"Ugh, why not?" Sam moaned.

"Aw man, I think she got smoothie on my Pearpad," Freddie frowned, grabbing a napkin to clean off his device. "You know, Sam. I should be making _you _clean this."

"Yeah, like that'll happen," Sam scoffed.

"Hey, this smoothie tastes pretty good," Gibby said, taking a sip of his own smoothie. "You can really taste the mango."

"Guys, come on," Carly said to her two best friends, ignoring Gibby's comment. "Don't fight. Freddie, I'm sure your Pearpad's fine."

"It better be," Freddie mumbled.

"Anyway," Carly continued. "We need one more thing for this week's show."

"You know what I think it is," Gibby said, still sipping his smoothie. "I think it's because I got the feminine boost in it."

"Why don't we do a cool little skit about an alien who comes to earth from another planet and is having trouble adjusting to life here," Freddie suggested.

"That sounds…interesting," Carly said. "But-"

"Dude, that idea sucks," Sam said bluntly.

"Well what's hear what _you've_ got," Freddie said, crossing his arms.

"You think it's healthy for me to be drinking feminine boost when I'm not a feminine?" Gibby asked. "I mean, what's the worst that could happen? I grow boobs or something?"

"Gibby, in case you haven't realized, we're blocking you out," Carly said.

"Oh, okay, sorry," Gibby said.

"My ideas are ten times better than yours, Fredbag," Sam said. She turned to Carly. "How about we do a bit where bring Spencer in and hit him with a marshmallow gun every time he says the word 'the'?"

"What? That's totally-" Freddie began, but he was cut off by Carly.

"That sounds pretty funny," she grinned. "He _does _say 'the' a lot. What do you think, Freddie?"

"I-fine," Freddie shrugged, jotting the idea down. "If you think _that's _funnier than a dysfunctional alien."

"Cool, then we should head back to my place and start working on everything," Carly said, getting to her feet and grabbing her bag and half-finished smoothie.

"Yeah, good idea," Freddie agreed. He was about to grab his half-finished smoothie as well, but before he could, Sam snatched it and began sipping it.

"Sam! I wasn't done with that!"

"Too bad, Fredguts, I'm still thirsty," Sam said.

"Give me it," Freddie said, trying to wrestle his smoothie back from the blonde, only to wind up flat on the floor.

"Nice try, Frederly," Sam smirked.

"You guys, people are _staring_," Carly hissed.

"Overly-aggressive she demon," Freddie muttered under his breath as the four left the Groovy Smoothie and began walking back to Bushwell Plaza.

"What did you say?" Sam frowned.

"Nothing," Freddie said quickly.

"You said I was aggressive!" Sam snapped. "Carly!"

"Um…yeah, I'll stay out of this," Carly said. She turned to Gibby. "So tell me more about that feminine boost."

"You took my smoothie!" Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "What am I supposed to call you? Gentle and kind?"

Sam narrowed her eyes. "You better take that back, Fredward."

"I-no," he said, crossing his arms.

"Fine," Sam said, giving Freddie a shove. "Teach you to call _me _aggressive."

As Freddie stumbled back, though, a bike messenger was just turning the corner. Freddie tried to balance himself, but it was too late; he collided with the bike messenger, and as he tripped over the front wheel, he fell right into a fire hydrant, hitting his head hard.

"Oh my God, Freddie!" Carly said, rushing over to him. "Are you okay?"

"Not really!" Freddie winced, rubbing his head.

"Huh, I didn't know they had bike messengers anymore," Gibby said, watching as the messenger got to his feet and rode off. "Nice to see the Internet hasn't destroyed their career."

"Gibby!' Carly exclaimed. She turned back to Freddie. "How's your head feel?"

"Like a hear of buffalo just ran across it," Freddie said. "Thanks a lot, Sam. I think my left ear might have some hearing loss from this…_and _I've got blood coming out of it!"

"Sam, seriously, you need to be more careful with things like this," Carly said, handing Freddie a tissue for his ear. "I mean, Freddie could've been hurt-"

"I _am _hurt," Freddie moaned.

"_Even more_," Carly finished. She looked over at her best friend. "Sam? Are you listening to me?"

Sam, who had been staring at Freddie with the oddest expression on her face, snapped back to reality. "Huh? Oh, sure Carls."

"Here, let's get you back to my place so we can get you some ice," Carly said, helping Freddie to his feet.

"Yeah, hopefully that will help," Freddie said, still cringing in pain.

"Um, here," Sam said, handing Freddie the smoothie she had taken from him. "Um, it's cold…it'll probably help."

"Well, at least I got my smoothie back," Freddie muttered. "Come on; let's just get back so hopefully we'll be able to get that Spencer bit done. Otherwise we're going to be behind for our show."

"Hey, um, actually, why don't we do your alien idea?" Sam suggested.

Freddie stopped in his tracks. "What? You just told me it was stupid."

"Eh, it wasn't _that _bad," Sam said. "You down for it, Carls?"

"Um, yeah, that's fine," Carly nodded. "Wow, Sam," she added once Freddie turned to Gibby to say something. "Are you actually feeling _guilty_? I mean, that's just two nice things in a row you've done for Freddie."

"Huh? Oh, yeah, maybe," Sam nodded. "Yeah…guilty."

….

**AN-I don't know if I actually believe that Sam only started falling for Freddie when this whole incident apparently took place. I think she maybe had some feelings for awhile, and when this supposedly happened, that was the thing that really made her fall hard for Freddie. But, I don't know. I suppose only Dan knows when Sam really fell for Freddie. **


	215. Chapter 215

_Smile_

"Carly, no," Sam said, talking into her pearphone as she drove through the streets of Seattle. "I don't feel like going to the mall with you."

She rolled her eyes as she turned onto the street where her apartment building was.

"Because," she said, continuing her conversation with Carly. "We just spent twelve hours at work rushing to get a bunch of T.V. scripts written. I'm exhausted; I know _you _have sudden bursts of energy when it comes to shopping, but I just want to go home, eat some meat and watch violent television for the rest of the night. We'll do something after work tomorrow, okay?"

Once she hung up with her best friend, she parked her car in front of her apartment building and dragged her feet up the five flights of stairs to her place. She quickly unlocked her front door and headed into her bedroom. She took a short shower and then changed into a pair of sweat pants and one of Freddie's old sweatshirts that he had left behind months ago that Sam had claimed as her own. Just as she was running a comb through her wet hair, she heard the sound of footsteps coming from the living room.

Putting down her comb, Sam grabbed an old sock and opened up the mini-fridge she kept by her bed and took out a stick of butter.

She stepped out of her bedroom, ready to give any intruder who had come into her home a thorough beating.

"Hey, who's here?" Sam said loudly, looking around the apartment.

"Sam, baby, it's me," Freddie said, walking into the room from the kitchen. "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you."

"Dude, you know I wasn't scared," Sam said, dropping her butter sock. "I have five pounds of ham in my fridge I need to protect!"

"Yes, because I'm sure if anybody actually did break in here, your ham is the first thing they'd go for," Freddie said, chuckling as Sam gave him a quick kiss.

"If I broke into house, the first place I'd go for is the kitchen," Sam pointed out. "And why are you sneaking into my apartment anyway?"

"What? A guy can't come and visit his girlfriend after work?" Freddie said. "Besides, I did knock. You must've been in the shower, though, so I just picked the lock and let myself in."

"_You _picked my lock?" Sam asked, raising an eyebrow. "Aw, baby. You _have _learned something from me!"

"Took me ten minutes to finally get it, but I managed," Freddie said proudly.

"Well, it was nice of you to over to see me and all," Sam said. "But I really don't feel like going out tonight. Work was crazy and I just wanna relax."

"I know," Freddie smiled.

"You do?" Sam frowned. "How?"

"Well when we talked at lunch, you sounded pretty stressed," Freddie said. "I figured you'd probably want to take it easy tonight. Which is why, I did this…"

He took her hand and led her into the kitchen where two candles were sitting, lit, on the table, along with two containers of B.F. Wangs.

"Is that sweet and sour pork I smell?" Sam grinned.

"Yes it is; your favorite," Freddie said, pulling out Sam's chair for her. "Oh, and I also picked up these on my way here…" He set down a vase of roses on the table.

"Dude, are you serious?" Sam said, looking up at her boyfriend. "You _really _did all this?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded.

"Um, why?"

"Just because," Freddie shrugged. "I mean, you're my girlfriend, Sam. I love you. I kind of enjoy doing things like this for you. Oh, and I picked up these for after dinner…"

He pulled out three DVD's from his bag.

"It's the entire Judo Junior trilogy!" Sam exclaimed. "I love these movies!"

"I know you do," Freddie grinned.

"Man, looks like I'm gonna have to do something big to even the score in this relationship," Sam said, chuckling.

"No you don't," Freddie said. "Besides, it's not like I'm not getting anything out of doing this, you know."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I've already gotten to see you smile about a dozen times since I've been here," Freddie said.

"So?" Sam shrugged. "I smiled. Big deal."

"Yeah, it is a big deal. To me, at least," Freddie told her. "Sam, you have no idea how much I _love _seeing your smile. That's why I like doing things to _make _you smile."  
Sam could feel a blush creeping onto her face. "You know…you don't have to go all out like this to make me smile, Fredward. I really just need…you."

And with that, Freddie pulled her into an embrace, pressing his lips to his.

"I love you," he whispered when they pulled away.

"I love you too," Sam said softly.


	216. Chapter 216

_Gut_

"Hey, is it cool if I eat the last orange?" Freddie asked, going through the fridge in the Shay's kitchen.

"Yeah, go ahead," Carly said, looking up from her laptop. "Hey, Sam? Did you get the email about the big sale at Build-A-Bra? We should go this weekend. We could go with-"

"Ugh," Sam moaned, cutting her off. "Will you quit brining that up?"

"Bringing what up?" Freddie asked.

"Nothing," Sam said quickly.

"I honestly don't know why you make such a big deal every time," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "You know, if I had a-"

"Just drop it, okay?" Sam said.

"Okay, what is going on here?" Freddie frowned.

"I told you, _nothing_," Sam said firmly.

"But-"

"Hey, don't you have to get to the airport and pick _nothing _up from the airport?" Carly asked, looking at her watch.

"Crab, I forgot," Sam said, quickly getting to her feet. She grabbed her jacket and bag. "I'll see you tomorrow, Carls."

"Wait, I may swing by you place tonight, if that's okay," Carly said. "I want to say hello to-"

"Don't!"

"So…are _you _going to tell me what that was about?" Freddie asked once Sam closed the door.

"Sam's just a little touchy since Melanie is staying in Seattle for her boarding school's semester break," Carly explained.

"Who?" Freddie said.

"Melanie," Carly repeated. "Come on, you remember her."

"Oh, Sam's _twin_?" Freddie said, shaking his head. "Wow, you guys. I'll admit, it was pretty crafty the first time you two pulled this on me, but twice is just overkill. Besides, Sam _told _me "Melanie" was just her the whole time the first time you did this."

"What are you talking about?" Carly laughed. "You mean Sam never went back and told you she just told you that to shut you up about the whole thing?"

"Nice try," Freddie said. "But this isn't going to work twice."

"But we're not-"

"I'll see you later," Freddie said, shaking his head as he headed out of the apartment. "And maybe I'll get to see Mythical Melanie too."

….

"Thanks again for taking us out to dinner, mom," Melanie Puckett said as her, Sam and Pam walked back into their house later that evening.

"Eh, no problem, kid," Pam said, tossing her bag onto the floor.

"You've said thank you about fifteen times already," Sam said. "Give it a rest, will you?"

"Sorry, I just thought it was really nice of mom to do that," Melanie said.

"Well, I've got to go meet my doctor," Pam said, looking at her phone. "I've got to go make a down payment for my plastic surgery tomorrow."

"What plastic surgery are you getting?" Melanie asked.

"Some kind to make my gut less flabby," Pam replied. "Now I've got to run…I'm supposed to meet the doctor behind El Taco Guapo in five minutes."

"Isn't this great?" Melanie asked cheerfully as Pam slammed the front door behind her. "Me and you can finally have some time to catch up. I mean, we haven't seen each other in almost a year, can you believe that?"

"Yeah, shocking," Sam mumbled, sitting herself down on the couch and flipping on the T.V.

"So," Melanie said, sitting down next to her twin. "What's been going on with you since we last saw each other?"

"Oh, um, nothing much," Sam said. "Just doing iCarly, getting detention, the usual."

"But what about boys?" Melanie asked, grinning.

"What about them?"

"Well, last time we talked, weren't you dating Freddie?" Melanie said.

"Oh, we broke up," Sam said. "A while ago…"

"Oh no," Melanie frowned. "I'm sorry, Sam."

"Why? It's not a big deal," Sam said, shrugging. "Besides, _I _dumped him."

"Well do you still see him everyday?" Melanie asked.

"Yeah, we still hang out," Sam said. "You know, with Carly and Gibby."

"Are you sure that's not hard for you?" Melanie asked.

"What? No, I told you," Sam said. "_I _dumped _him_. If anyone's depressed and wishes we never broke up and were still a couple and could hold hands and kiss and go out on dates it's Freddie. Not me. Him."

"Um, okay then," Melanie said, nodding. "Well, what else has been going-"

Just then there was a knock at the door.

"If you don't have a warrant, you can't come in!" Sam yelled loudly.

"It's just me," Carly called through the door.

"Oh, well then it's open," Sam replied.

"Melanie, hi!" Carly grinned, spotting her best friend's sister. "Wow, I haven't seen you in what, three years?"

"Just about," Melanie smiled, hugging Carly. "Wow, your hair looks so cute!"

"Thanks, so does yours," Carly said. "Anyway, I just wanted to stop by and say hi. I didn't mean to interrupt the sister-bonding time you two were having."

"Oh, please do," Sam mumbled, but luckily, only Carly heard her. She gave her best friend a stern look.

"Well, you could hang out here with us," Melanie suggested. "I mean, you and Sam are practically sisters anyway. Oh! I brought back this really cool French manicure kit. We could do that!"

"Count me out," Sam said at once. "I don't do manicures."

"You sure?" Melanie asked.

"Positive."

"Okay, well, come on, Carly," Melanie said. "The stuff's up in my room."

Sam shook her head as Carly and her sister ran upstairs. Melanie was only going to be here for a week, but it sure was going to be a long week…

…

Sam kicked off her shoes and pulled on a pair of old shorts, preparing to go to bed. Carly had left a little while ago, after giving her a quick talking-to about the importance of being civil to Melanie during her visit.

Just as Sam was about to climb into her bed, Melanie walked into the room.

"Hey," she said, sitting down on the corner of the bed. "You going to sleep?"

"Yes, that would be why I have pajamas on and am in my bed," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Well, do you think we could talk about something first?"

"Ugh," Sam moaned. "Fine. What?"

"You know earlier today, how we were talking about you and Freddie?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded.

"Well," Melanie sighed. "I watch iCarly every week you guys do it-"

"So?" Sam said.

"I-I've just been thinking…Freddie's…he's really cute."

Sam frowned. "Huh?"

"I mean, earlier today, you said you were totally over him, right?" Melanie said.

"Um, y-yeah, I _am_, but-"

"And obviously I'd _never _even consider this if you were still dating him, or still had any sort of feelings for him," Melanie continued. "But I was just thinking…maybe it'd be sort of fun to date him."

Sam's eyes widened. "You want to date Freddie?"

"Yeah," Melanie nodded. "He's super sweet, cute…but, if you don't want me to, if it would make you feel weird, I won't even try."

"I-You-I don't care," Sam said. "Go ahead. Ask Freddie out."

"Really? You'd be okay with it?" Melanie asked.

"Why wouldn't I be?" Sam said.

"Oh, thanks Sam!" Melanie said, throwing her arms around her twin. "You're the best!"

…

Sam slammed her locker door shut. _Stupid Melanie. _Now she was extra glad she convinced Freddie Melanie didn't exist last time she came. Hopefully, if Melanie _did _ask him out, he'd just think it was her trying to trick him again.

_Not that I __**care**__ who that nub dates_, Sam told herself quickly.

"Hey," Carly said, greeting her best friend brightly.

"Hey," Sam mumbled, stuffing a book into her backpack forcefully.

"Er, I know your not really a fan of reading, but don't you think you're being a little hard on that book?" Carly frowned.

"No," Sam snapped.

"Okay," Carly said. "What's wrong?"

"Melanie's being obnoxious, as usual," Sam replied.

"Oh come on, she's cool," Carly said. "I had a great time with her last night, doing our nails. Maybe if you'd actually spend some time with her, you'd-"

"Hey, Freddie still doesn't know she's real, right?" Sam asked, cutting her off.

"Um, yeah, I think," Carly nodded. "Why?"

"Because Melanie wants to ask him out," Sam said.

"Really?" Carly said. "Wait, is that why you're so wazzed off?"

"I'm not wazzed off!" Sam said. "I don't care if she dates him!"

"Well then why-"

"In fact," Sam said, slugging her bag over her shoulder. "I think I should find one of _her _ex-boyfriends and date him, since apparently it's okay to date your sister's ex-boyfriend now."

"But I thought you just said you were okay with her asking Freddie out," Carly pointed out.

"I am!"

"Well, what kind of guys does Melanie usually date?" Carly asked.

"Dorky preppy guys," Sam mumbled.

"Well, Freddie's pretty dorky and preppy," Carly said. "Looks like you two have the same taste in guys. Must be a twin thing."

"We do not!" Sam said. "You know what? I'm going to go hit golf balls at the track girls."

And with that, she stormed off, still fuming.

….

"Hey," Carly greeted Spencer as her and Freddie walked into the apartment after school that day.

"Hey," Spencer replied, looking up from the sculpture he was working on. "What goes on?"

"Nothing," Freddie said, sitting down on the couch. "Hey, do you mind if I sleep here tonight? My mom's got this new dehumidifier and it's really loud. I barely got any sleep last night."

"Yeah, sure," Spencer said. "Hey, where's Sam?"

"She got detention for hitting the track coach in the head with a golf ball," Carly replied.

"Ah," Spencer nodded.

Just then, there was a knock at the door. Carly crossed the room and opened it, revealing Melanie.

"Hey, Melanie!" Carly said.

"Melanie's here?" Spencer asked as Carly let Sam's sister in.

"Yeah, she got here yesterday," Carly nodded as Spencer gave Melanie a quick hug.

"Good to see you, Spencer," Melanie said.

"You too, kid," Spencer said.

"Oh, really guys?" Freddie said, getting to his feet. "You're _actually _doing this again?"

"Freddie!" Melanie exclaimed, hurrying over to give him a hug. "I haven't seen you in ages!"

"Yeah, its been a full fifteen minutes since school," Freddie said.

"Freddie," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "For the millionth time, Sam _does _have a twin."

"And for the millionth time, I'm not buying it," Freddie said. "It's so obvious that this is just Sam! I mean, it's a pretty big coincidence that Sam and "Melanie" are never in the same room, isn't it? Now maybe if-"

"Ugh, detention with Mr. Howard is pure torture," Sam said, suddenly coming through the door. "I had to pay Rip-Off Rodney ten bucks to make a distraction so I could sneak out and-Melanie? What are you doing here?"

"Mom's new boyfriend was over, so I thought I'd give them some peace and quiet," Melanie replied.  
"You-I-There's-there's _two!_" Freddie exclaimed, his eyes bulging as he looked from Sam to Melanie.

"I _told _you," Carly said.

"You're really a twin?" Freddie said, turning to Sam. "But…why'd you tell me she didn't exist?"

"To get your nerdy self to shut up," Sam said.

"Wait…then who was it that I took out on that date last time?" Freddie frowned.

"You really think I'd go to some lame dance club?" Sam asked. "You went with Melanie."

"Oh…" Freddie said.

"Actually, Freddie," Melanie said. "I was just going to talk to you about that. Since I'm going to be here for another week, I was wondering if maybe you wanted to go out again?"

Sam looked away. It was bad enough that Melanie was going to ask him out, but did she really have to do it right in front of her?

"Like…on a date?" Freddie asked.

"Uh-huh," Melanie smiled.

"Oh, um…" Freddie began.

Sam turned and headed towards the door.

"Where are you going?" Carly asked.

"Um, Wendy just texted me," Sam lied quickly. "Apparently Mr. Howard came back to detention and noticed I was gone."

She hurried out of the apartment and leaned against the wall next to the elevator. Now that she had just witnessed it, there was no denying it. Melanie going out with Freddie destroyed her; it made her feel like there was a ten-foot spear being stabbed through her. And as much as she hated to admit it, she realized why.

That's why, as she stepped into the elevator, she vowed to herself that she would do anything she could to make sure her sister and Freddie did _not _go on any date.

…..

"Morning, Sam," Melanie smiled the next morning as Sam dragged her feet into the kitchen.

Sam glared at her sister in response.

"I didn't get a chance to talk to you last night," Melanie continued, clearly not noticing Sam's bitterness. "When I got home, you were already asleep."

"Yeah, well detention really takes it out of you," Sam mumbled, grabbing herself a box of cereal.

"Well, guess what?" Melanie said as Sam poured herself a bowl of Chocolate Frosted Fudge Balls.

"What?"

"Freddie and I have a date," she said happily.

Sam tried not to gag on her breakfast. "Well isn't that just peachy?" she snapped.

"Yeah, we're meeting at Pini's at seven tonight," Melanie said.

Pini's? Sam thought to herself. Oh, Melanie was crafty…picking the same spot Sam and Freddie used to go to on dates…

"Well, I should get going," Melanie said, placing her breakfast dishes in the dishwasher. "I want to go find a cute outfit for tonight. You want to come to the mall with me?"

"No, I have a bunch of sitting and eating to do," Sam replied.

"Alright, well I'll see you later then," Melanie shrugged.

Sam heard the front door close. She looked over at the counter and saw that Melanie had left her purse there…Quickly getting to her feet, she opened up her sister's bag and found her pearphone inside.

Smiling triumphantly to herself, she pulled up the contacts and saw that sure enough, Freddie's number had been added.

"You should learn not to leave your stuff lying around, Mel," Sam said to herself as she began typing a new text message.

_Hey, Freddie_, she typed. _Would you mind meeting me at Pini's at six instead of seven tonight?_

She waited anxiously for a response, hoping Freddie would give her an answer before Melanie realized she left her bag and came back.

Luckily, the phone dinged a moment later. Sam looked at the screen and saw that Freddie had responded: _Sure, no problem. _

"Yes!" Sam said, putting the phone back into the purse.

Just then she heard the door open again. Hurrying back to the table where she had been sitting, Sam tried to act as natural as she could.

"I can't believe I almost left my purse here," Melanie said, grabbing her bag. "How awful would that have been if I got to the mall without it?"

"Pretty bad," Sam said. "Well, bye. You don't want to waste any shopping time."

"Nope," Melanie grinned. "Have fun here, Sam."

After her sister left for the second time, Sam rushed upstairs to her room and began rummaging through her closet. If her plan was going to work, she'd better start working on it now…

…

Sam grimaced as she walked through the parking lot of Pini's in high heels that made her feet feel like they were being tortured. She was wearing a daffidilly pink dress and her hair was up in a ponytail; she looked completely unlike herself. But tonight, that was the point.

"Um, hi," she said to the waiter inside of Pini's. "I'm looking for a Freddie Benson."

"Ah yes, Mr. Benson, party of two, is seated over there at table three," the waiter replied.

Sam spotted Freddie sitting at one of the booths.

"Thanks," she said. She headed over to the booth, trying not to think about all the times her and Freddie had gone here for the lasagna that they both loved.

"Oh, hi Melanie," Freddie said as Sam approached. "How you doing?"  
Sam plastered on a fake grin. "Hey, Freddie!" she said in a high-pitched voice just like her sister's. "I'm so glad we're doing this tonight!"  
"Um, yeah, me too," Freddie nodded. "You have to try the lasagna here; it's incredible."

"Yeah, sure," Sam nodded. For once, food wasn't the first thing on her mind.

"So," Freddie said, closing his menu. "Growing up with Sam. That must've been…interesting."

"Well, I was actually kind of a jerky kid," Sam said. "You know, I always got Sam into trouble by telling on her for stupid things like poking holes in our neighbor's car. I don't know _why _people think I'm the sweet twin."

"Oh…okay," Freddie frowned. "Um, so what kind of things do you like?"

"Anything that doesn't involve trains, man I hate trains," Sam said. "And _Galaxy Wars_; that NugNug guy is just the stupidest thing I've ever heard of. Oh, and I really don't like tech stuff either."

"Ah…interesting," Freddie nodded.

Sam smiled sweetly. Hopefully, if she kept this up, Freddie would not want to go on another date with her sister ever again…

"So, um, these breadsticks…they're pretty good," Freddie said, taking a bite of one.

Sam stared across the table. She tried not to think about how similar this felt to one of their dates months ago…Of course on their last date, just a couple of days before they broke up, they didn't do much talking here…it was mostly them cuddling up on one side of the booth while they kissed until their food came.

_You know what_? Sam thought to herself as she continued to stare at Freddie. _I'm on a date with him right now…_

"Hey, Freddie," Sam said, moving to sit next to him instead of across.

"Um, yeah?" Freddie asked, looking a bit confused as to why she had suddenly changed seats.

Sam moved closer to him and pressed her lips to his for the first time in months. The sparks she felt only lasted a few seconds, though, for Freddie pulled away quickly.

"Er, why did you just kiss me?" he frowned.

"Because," Sam laughed. "We're on a _date_. That's what people do on dates."

"What do you mean we're on a-" Freddie started, but then his eyes widened, as if he had just had a startling revelation. He looked right into Sam's eyes.

"Sam?"

"What? No," Sam said quickly, feeling a surge of panic run through her. "I-I'm Melanie, remember?"

"No…" Freddie said. "You're Sam."

"No I'm-Okay, fine," Sam said, giving up her fake high-pitched voice. "I'm Sam."

"Why are you dressed up like Melanie?" Freddie asked.

"Because I-Because you can't date Melanie, okay?" Sam said. "There. I said it, you happy?"

"What do you mean?" Freddie frowned. "Who said I'm dating Melanie?"

"What do _you _mean?" Sam asked. "She asked you out yesterday! She _told _me this morning that you said yes!"

"I didn't say yes to going out on a date with her," Freddie said.

"Oh, really?" Sam snapped. "Then why are you here, ready to meet her?"

"She didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?"

"Well, after you left to go back to detention yesterday," Freddie explained. "Melanie said she didn't mean she wanted to go out on a date _really_. She just wanted to sort of…hang out because she didn't really get to know me last time when she was here, you know, since I thought she was you the whole time. She said we could meet here and just talk. Non-romantically, strictly as friends. So I agreed."

"Wait, so she _didn't _ask you out here to try and get you to go out with her?" Sam asked, confused.

"No," Freddie replied.

"Oh," Sam said, feeling quite embarrassed. "Well then…I should just be going then-"

"Sam, wait," Freddie said.

Sam turned to him.

"Why'd you pretend to be Melanie?"

Sam sighed. "Because. I wanted to make sure your date was a disaster so you wouldn't want to go out with Melanie again."

"Why wouldn't you want me going out with Melanie again?" Freddie asked.

Sam looked at him. "Isn't it obvious?" she said softly.

Sudden realization dawned on him. "You didn't want me dating Melanie…" he said slowly. "Because…you-you still-?"

Sam nodded. "Maybe a little."

"Oh."

"But…whatever, it's nothing," Sam said quickly, feeling her face redden.

"So, is that why you kissed me just now?" Freddie asked.

"Um…yeah," Sam said. "But like I said, it-it's nothing. I know we broke up. I guess…I guess the only reason I-I cared that you were going to date Melanie is because she's my identical twin sister. It would've been kind of weird."

"Yeah, I guess it would've been," Freddie said in agreement.

The two were silent for a moment.

"I-I'm gonna go," Sam said. She was about to stand up, but Freddie grabbed her hand, stopping her.

"Before Melanie told me that this wasn't going to be a real date," he told her. "Back when I thought she was asking me out for real…I was going to say no."

"You were?" Sam said.

"I was," he nodded. "Because there's only one Puckett who I'd ever want to go out with. And it's not Melanie."

Sam smiled. "You really mean that?"

"I do," he said. He looked up at her. "You know…we're here at Pini's…our favorite date spot…it would be a shame to let this table go to waste. We might as well stay here…get some lasagna. Sort of like a…second first date?"  
Sam frowned. "You mean…you want this this to be a date?"

"Do _you _want this to be a date?"

Sam smirked. "Nice try. I asked you first."

"Fine," Freddie chuckled. "Yeah, I do."

"Well," Sam said, reaching for a breadstick. "You're in luck."

…

Sam unlocked her front door and kicked off her shoes as she walked into the house.

"So," Melanie said from the living room. "How was your date?"

"It was-" Sam started. "Hey, wait a minute. How do you know I was just on a date?"

"Duh, because I totally set you up on it," Melanie grinned.

"What?" Sam frowned.

"Well, actually, we did," Melanie said.

"Who's we?"

"I'm we," Carly said, walking into the room with a bowl of popcorn. "So, did you and Freddie re-couple? Did you?"

"What's going on here?" Sam asked, confused.

"Come on," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "You don't _really _think Melanie would ask out Freddie, do you?"

"So you _don't _like Freddie?" Sam asked her sister.

"Of course not!" Melanie said. "But I wanted you to _think _I did."

"How come?" Sam demanded.

"Well, did you or did you not just come back from getting back together with him?" Melanie asked.

"I-yes," Sam said.

"Ah! This is so great!" Carly squealed, running over to Sam to hug her. "I want details. Now. What did Freddie say? Did you two kiss? Did you-" She was interrupted by her pearphone ringing.

"It's Spencer," she said, looking at the screen. She unlocked the phone. "Hello? What? How could you glue yourself to _that_? Alright, alright. I'm coming." She hung up. "Well, I have to go help Spencer unstick himself from our bathtub. _But _I'll be calling later tonight, Sam, and then I want to hear everything."

"Sure thing, Carls," Sam chuckled.

Sam waited until Carly left before turning to her sister. "So…this whole thing was set up?"

"Yup," Melanie nodded proudly. "I knew you still liked Freddie…When we were talking the other night, it was pretty obvious. But I know you, Sam. You're too stubborn to admit that. Which is why I told you I wanted to ask Freddie out; because I knew _that _would get you to do something. Yesterday, when I asked Freddie out in front of you, I knew that would get to you and that you would leave right away, which gave me the chance to tell Freddie that I didn't _actually _want to go out with him; that I just wanted to hang out with him and get to know him. And this morning after I told you that I _was_ going on a date with Freddie, I left my phone where you'd find it because I _knew _you'd try to sabotage the date by pretending to be me and making sure Freddie wouldn't want to ever go out with me again. _But _I knew once you got to the restaurant and saw Freddie, you'd be reminded of your own dates with him, and you wouldn't be able to resist kissing him, which of course would make Freddie realize that you were you and not me."

"I-You-That's-That's genius," Sam said, blinking. "Jeez, Melanie. I guess they do teach you a lot at that fancy boarding school of yours."

"Well, like I said, Carly did help me," Melanie said. "That night when we were upstairs doing our nails, I told her the plan, and she agreed to help out."

"Wow," Sam said, sitting down next to her sister. "I can't believe that…I mean, you knew _exactly _what I was going to do."  
"Twin thing, I guess," Melanie shrugged.

"Yeah, must be," Sam nodded. "But, um…thanks."

"Sam, you're my sister," Melanie said. "I know how happy you were when you were with Freddie. I just wanted to make you that happy again."

Sam smiled. She looked over at Melanie. "Oh alright. We can hug."

"Really? Yay!" Melanie grinned as she threw her arms around her sister. Sam rolled her eyes, but she hugged her back.


	217. Chapter 217

**AN-Hey, Happy holidays**** This chapter is a sequel to chapter 178, where Freddie fences Jonah, but looses. **

…**.**

_Loss_

"Man, who knew a fencing tournament could go on for so long," Carly said as her and Sam climbed down from the bleachers to meet Freddie.

"I know, and the concession stand didn't even have decent food," Sam said. "I think those corndogs were low-fat."

"You guys didn't have to stay for the whole thing," Freddie said. "You could've left after Jonah eliminated me."

"Eh, we decided to wait for you, since you had to stay the whole time," Sam said. "But dude, you owe me some decent corndogs now."

"All right," Freddie chuckled. "Hey, I'll meet you outside. I want to just put my stuff in my locker."

"Okay," Carly said. "Come on, Sam. I want to see if I can find that cute guy who fenced in the fourth round."

Freddie watched as his girlfriend and Carly hurried out of the now near empty gym. He picked up his fencing gear and was about to head into the locker rooms, when he heard a voice behind him.

"Well, well, well, Benson."

Freddie turned around and saw Jonah strutting towards him. He felt his jaw clench. "What do _you _want?"

"Just saw Sam leaving. Did she finally come to her senses and dump you?" Jonah smirked.

"No, unlike you, I can actually manage to keep her as a girlfriend for more than a week," Freddie retorted.

The grin on Jonah's face vanished. "Pretty tough talk coming form a guy who got eliminated from the tournament in the first round. By _me_."

"Getting eliminated in the second round like you did isn't much better," Freddie said. "Besides, we both know who the better fencer here is. You're just lucky I let the comments about Sam dumping me that you made before the match get to me. If I had my head in the match, I would've beaten you."

"Oh, really?" Jonah said, stepping closer to Freddie. "Is that what you think?"

"That's exactly what I think," Freddie said, trying not to be intimidated by the fact that Jonah had a good six inches on him.

"Well," Jonah said. "Mat's empty now. What do you say you and I have a little…rematch?"

"You want to fence me again?" Freddie frowned.

"That would be the definition of a rematch, _nub_," Jonah said.

Freddie felt his blood boil. There was only one person who was allowed to call him a nub…

"Fine," Freddie said, pulling his gear out of his bag. "Let's fence. First one to three hits wins."

"Good, this will be easy," Jonah said, pulling on his mask. "I think I'll really enjoy beating you twice in one day."

"Just call it," Freddie snapped.

"En guard," Jonah said, pointing his fencing sword at Freddie.

The boys began their match.

_Okay, Benson, _Freddie told himself as he avoided a jab from Jonah. _You can't lose to this moron twice. Just stay focused, and you'll be fine. _

And sure enough, a second later, Freddie's sword made its hit on Jonah.

"Hope you enjoy that point," Jonah sneered. "Because that's all you're going to get."

"I wouldn't be so sure," Freddie said, feeling rather confident now. The two re-started their match. It seemed as if loosing to Jonah earlier that day had given Freddie a second wave of energy, for he had his second hit on Jonah in a matter of seconds.

"Yes!" Freddie cheered, pumping his fist in the air.

"You still need one more," Jonah reminded him. "And now that I'm warmed up, you might as well just surrender. No point in embarrassing yourself twice."

Freddie flexed his sword. "Let's just go, Jonah."

_Come on, Freddie, just one more point_, Freddie told himself as the two resumed the match. _Then you can go tell Sam all about how you beat this loser…_

"You know," Jonah said, a bit out of breath as he continued to dodge Freddie's sword. "At the beginning of this tournament, I've got to admit; I was a little shocked that a girl like Sam Puckett would be into a dorky guy like you. But after seeing Sam today, I have to say…she's lost her appeal to me."

Freddie narrowed his eyes. He knew what Jonah was trying to do…

"Nope, she doesn't really seem like "girlfriend material", if you know what I mean," Jonah continued. "Maybe it's best I dumped her and let you get her."

That did it…Freddie jabbed his sword into Jonah's chest forcefully, getting him his third point and the match.

"First of all," Freddie said, crossing his arms menacingly. "If I recall, _Sam _dumped _you. _And second, you'd be lucky to have a girl like Sam. If you don't think she's girlfriend material, then you must not have good taste at all."

"Whatever," Jonah snapped, gathering his gear. "I still beat you in the tournament…where it counted." And with that he turned and headed towards the locker room.

"Hope you enjoyed you loss!" Freddie called after him, grinning. He turned around, about to head out, only to find Sam, leaning against the door of the gym's entrance.

"Sam?" Freddie frowned. "I thought you were outside with Carly?"

"Eh, she found a boy to flirt with, so I let them be," Sam said. "And also, I'm starving! I came in here to see what was taking you so long, but well, looks like you were pretty busy."

"Oh…you saw that, huh?" Freddie asked.

"Uh-huh," Sam smiled. "Man, Jonah must've really gotten in your head earlier. If you would've fenced like that earlier today, you could've won this whole thing!"

"Nah," Freddie said modestly. "Hey, let's get out of here. I'm sure your stomach's probably ready to implode."

"If that's a fancy word for shrivel up, then yes, it is," Sam nodded. But as Freddie headed for the door, she grabbed his hand, stopping him in his tracks.

"So," she said, a bit softer. "You really think I'm "girlfriend material"?"

"Shoosh yeah I do," Freddie nodded. "You're a great girlfriend, Sam. I really mean that."

"Yeah, I am, aren't I?" Sam grinned. She leaned up to give Freddie a quick kiss. "But you're not that bad yourself, Benson."


	218. Chapter 218

**AN- I got this request before iGoodbye, and originally, it was supposed to be about an iCarly reunion where Carly had actually gone to Yakima with her grandfather. But after iGoodbye, I figured it would be more relevant to do the reunion with Carly coming back after Italy. Hope you like it!**

…**..**

_Havoc_

"Carly! Hey, Carly! I'm over here! Carly!"

"Spencer, I see you!" Carly laughed, running over to her brother at the airport and giving him a big hug.

"Good, just making sure," Spencer said, returning the hug. "Nice to see you again, kid."

"You too," Carly smiled as the siblings pulled apart. "Man…I can't believe I'm back in Seattle. Its been what, two years almost?"

"Just about," Spencer nodded.

After Carly had gone to Italy with her dad, she had fallen in love with the country. Even though she did miss Spencer and her old school, and of course, her friends, she loved Italy, and therefore decided to stay and finish up her last year of high school there. She did return to the U.S. for college, however she decided to head to New York, where she had been accepted into a design school for aspiring clothing designers. Spencer, missing his little sister terribly, had visited Carly a few times, both in Italy and in New York, but he hadn't had Carly back, staying in his loft, since she had left with their dad that night.

"Well has the place changed since I left?" Carly asked as Spencer grabbed her bag from baggage claim. "Is the Groovy Smoothie still there? Is Lewbert still the doorman? What about-"

"Calm down, Carls," Spencer said. "You'll get to see everything; I mean, your winter break's almost a month long, right?"

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "Tomorrow I'll go explore Seattle and see how everything is. But tonight, it's just going to be the five of us. Me, you, Sam, Freddie and Gibby. Wow…I can't believe I haven't seen them since I left. I can't wait to see how they've all been!"

Sam, Freddie, and Gibby, had finished their senior year right at Ridgeway, but after that, they had gone their separate ways. Freddie had been accepted into MIT, his dream college, and left to start taking summer classes about a month after graduation. Gibby had stayed in Washington, but had moved out of Seattle. He had renovated an old recreation center and was now running some sort of an afterschool program for kids. Sam had decided that she needed a change of scenery as well. Right after graduation, she had packed up her bags and drove her new motorcycle that Spencer had given her all the way to L.A.

Carly had tried as hard as she could to keep in touch with her friends the past two years. And the one year while they were all still in high school, she did very well at it. Sure, it was a bit difficult to arrange web chats and phone calls with the huge time difference in play, but she made it a point to talk to everyone at least once a week. But then once they all went off in different directions it became harder. She tried to keep talking with everyone once a week, but soon she accepted the fact that living so far apart with such different schedules meant that she could really only talk to her friends a couple times a month. Even her phone calls with Sam became scarce, and the girls only video chatted on birthdays and major holidays.

But, after much planning on her part, Carly had finally managed to work around everyone's schedules and pick a time when everyone was available to have a reunion get together. The others had gotten in a few days before, and now that she was back, Carly was more than excited to see how her friends had been.

"I have the spaghetti tacos all made," Spencer said. "And I have special honey glazed ham, for Sam, and I have a bunch of sculptures to show everyone!"

"Sounds fun," Carly smiled. "I can't wait."

….

"Wow, Spence, I can't believe that in the two years I've been gone, you haven't redecorated this place even a little," Carly said as Spencer opened the door to the apartment.

"What are you talking about?" Spencer frowned. "I got new hardwood floors in here! See, they're two shades darker than before."

"Ah, yes," Carly laughed. "How could I have missed that?"

"Spencer, my mom wants to know if she could borrow your-Carly?"

Carly turned around and saw Freddie standing in the doorway.

"Freddie!" she exclaimed, running over to give him a hug. "I was just about to go across the hall and see you! I've missed you so much!"

"Yeah, I've missed you too, Carly," Freddie grinned. "But I thought your plane was getting in for another three hours?"

"Nah, it got in way ahead of schedule," Carly explained. "So, how's MIT been? You teching up the whole place?"

"Well I _did _boost the Internet speed in my dorm by 19 percent," Freddie said proudly.

"Aw, you're a super nerd even in a big college full of nerds," Carly said. "Hey, since you're here I should text Gibby and Sam and tell them to just come over now."

"Gibby's on his way over here, actually," Freddie told her. "Him and I were going to watch the _Celebrities Underwater_ Christmas special while we waited for you to get here."

"Cool, is Sam on her way too then?" Carly asked.

"Um, no," Freddie said. "I-I actually haven't talked to her since I got home…Or since she left for L.A."

"What?" Carly frowned. "Why not?"

"Well I tried to," Freddie said. "But, well, Carly when you left for Italy…I think Sam was really affected by it."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, she was so much less…Samish," Freddie said. "She wasn't loud and disruptive at school, for one thing. She sort of just showed up, pretended to listen in class and that was it."

"She didn't try to glue Mr. Howard's butt to his seat or put holes in Mrs. Briggs tires?" Carly asked.

"Nope."

"Oh my God," Carly said. "But-She seemed fine whenever I talked to her."

"Because she knew that if you figured out upset she was, you'd feel guilty," Freddie said.

"Well…why didn't she hang out with you and Gibby?" Carly asked.

"We tried to get her to," Freddie told her. "And she did…sometimes. But not nearly as often as she did when you were here. The last time Gibby and I talked to her was the night after our graduation, when we were at the Groovy Smoothie. She told us that she was leaving for L.A. the next morning. I tried to talk her out of it, but she said that I was leaving soon, so what difference did it make if _she _stayed in Seattle. I even went to her house the next morning to try and get her to stay one last time, but she had already left."

"You guys didn't text or web chat or anything?" Carly frowned.

"Well, she _did _text me when she got to L.A., since I had filled up her inbox asking her if she was okay," Freddie said. "And I sent her chat requests, but she never answered them…and then one day about a month ago she did actually send _me _a chat request, but I was in class. When I got back to my dorm, she was already offline."

"Wow…well, at least she agreed to come tonight," Carly said. "Maybe you can talk to her then and figure out what's been going on. We were _all _such good friends; being in different states or countries or whatever should affect that."

"Carly!" Gibby suddenly exclaimed, looking into the apartment through the open door. "Carly! You're back!"

"Yeah, I am, Gib," Carly smiled. "Hey, I'm gonna text Sam and tell her to head over now. And why don't you start telling me about that rec center you work for now?"

"Well you remember that pet weasel I got from the guy at the head shop?" Gibby asked.

"Yeah," Carly nodded.

"Well I made him my business partner!"

"Hold on," Carly frowned. "You made a _weasel_ your business partner? Is that even legal?"

"Why? Are you going to turn me into the fuzz?" Gibby asked.

"Um, no."

"Good," Gibby said.

"Aw, Gib," Carly laughed. "You haven't changed at all." Her phone beeped and she looked down at the screen. "Okay, Sam said she'll be here in half-an-hour. So why don't I order the pizzas for us, and Spencer can get out the other food. Pepperoni good for you, Freddie?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded.

"Anchovies for me," Gibby said.

"Gross," Carly cringed. "I don't know how you can eat those salty little fish…Let's see, I'll get a veggie special for me, and the meat slam for Sam."

"Aw man, I should've brought my weasel," Gibby moaned. "He loves the vegie special!"

….

Once the pizzas arrived, Carly, Freddie, Gibby and Spencer sat themselves around the coffee table as they began to eat.

"And then I found out that the mole was actually just some leftover brownie," Spencer said, taking a bite of his pizza.

"How could you not notice a piece of brownie stuck to you for three days?" Carly asked.

"I'm not observant, okay!"

"But still," Carly said. "I'd think something like that-"

Suddenly, the front door opened and Sam walked in.

"Sam!" Carly exclaimed, jumping up and running over to her best friend. "I'm so happy to see you! I can't believe its been two years!"

"Um, Carls," Sam gasped as Carly squeezed her. "Kind of about to suffocate here."

"Sorry," Carly said, releasing her. "But I haven't seen you in two years; I had a lot of hugs stored up!"

"Yeah, I bet you do," Sam laughed. "Hey, is that meat slam pizza?"

"Of course, it's your favorite!" Carly said.

"Oh sweet!" Sam said, grabbing a slice. "No pizza place in L.A. makes this kind. I've been going insane without it!"

"Hey, I paid for it!" Spencer said. "Don't I get a hug?"

"Yeah, yeah," Sam smiled, giving the man a hug. "How you been, Spencer? Still a man-child sculptor?"

"You know it!" Spencer replied. "How's your motorcycle holding up?"

"Oh, it's awesome," Sam told him. "Hasn't failed me yet."

She turned to Gibby. "What's up, Gib? Hey, is that weasel hair on your shirt?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah," Gibby nodded, giving Sam a hug. "I was brushing the little guy's fur before I came over."

Freddie stood up and walked over to Sam. "Um, hey," he said awkwardly.

"'Sup?" Sam replied.

The two looked at each other for a moment. Were they supposed to hug?

"So, um," Sam said, clearing her throat. "Good to see you, nub." She patted him on the shoulder before turning back to Carly. "So how's New York, Carly?"

"Well, I never actually get to see the city," Carly said. "I'm really busy with design school. But it's a lot of fun. One of my classes is taught by Marcela DeLorento!"

"Who's she?" Sam asked.

"Only the most successful handbag designer in the world!" Carly said. "It's so cool just to have her evaluate my work. It's like having DaVinci look at your paintings!"

Freddie tried to pretend to listen to Carly along with the others. But the truth was he was barely listening to a word she said. Why had Sam hugged everyone else but him? On one hand, he could understand it. After all, how _was _one supposed to greet their ex-boyfriend after two years? But then again, weren't him and Sam _more_ than just exes? Weren't they still _friends_?

"So what about you, Sam?" Carly asked, bringing Freddie out of his thoughts. "What are you doing in L.A.?"

"Oh, um, you know," Sam said. "I…started my own business."

"You have your own business?" Freddie said.

"Well, my roommate and I started it," Sam said. "Hey, you guys actually know her!"

"We do?" Carly frowned.

"Yeah, you remember when we went to Kenen Thompson's house party to see if that guy you were dating was cheating on you?"

"Yeah," Carly nodded.

"Well do you remember one of the girls we met there? The tiny one with the red hair who couldn't talk because she had vocals nobs or something?"

"Oh yeah," Gibby said. "I remember her. She was really hot."

"Her name was Cat, right?" Carly asked.

"Yeah," Sam said. "Anyway, we met up in L.A. when we were both trying to buy the same apartment and figured it would be cheaper to just become roommates and share the place."

"Cool," Carly said. "So what's this business you guys have?"

"Um…it's-it's," Sam started. "Okay fine. It's a babysitting business."

"A babysitting service?" Freddie frowned. "You mean you _willingly _work with small, needy children?" That didn't seem like the Sam he remembered. He thought back to the time she had forced about a dozen elementary students to do hard-labor making penny tees for her.

"It's actually not _that _bad," Sam admitted. "Sure, I have to deal with a bunch of snot-nosed kids wreaking havoc in my apartment, but you see this keychain?" she pointed to a small lanyard keychain on her bag.

"Yeah, did one of the kids make it for you?" Carly asked.

"Uh-huh, right before he puked on my shoes," Sam nodded.

"That's sweet," Carly smiled. "And a little gross."

"Hey, I thought you guys were going to watch old iCarly clips," Spencer said. "I hooked up my laptop to the T.V. with some fancy cable so you could watch on a bigger screen."

"Oh, yeah," Carly said.

"Awesome, I love watching old iCarly clips," Sam said.

"Yeah, that show was a lot of fun," Gibby said.

"Let me just turn on my laptop," Spencer said. "And then we can-uh-oh."

"Why uh-oh?" Freddie asked.

"It looks like my charger broke, and my laptop's on like, ten percent battery," Spencer told him.

"Well, don't you have an extra charger lying around, Freddie?" Carly asked. "You have all sorts of computer things."

"Yeah, for Pear products," Freddie said. "This is a Moshibo laptop."

"You know what, I think I have an extra charger in our storage unit," Spencer said. "I'll go get it."

"Are you sure you can go by yourself?" Carly asked. "I haven't forgotten what happened last time you went down there two years ago. You know, with the folding chairs…"

"Er, maybe you should come with me," Spencer said, cringing a bit. "Just to be on the safe side."

"Okay, I'll be right back," Carly said, heading towards the door with her brother. "And then we can relive the best of our teen years!"

"Hey, you think they still have that fancy liquid soap in their bathroom?" Gibby asked as Carly and Spencer left the apartment.

"You're _still _obsessed with liquid soap?" Sam frowned, rolling her eyes.

"Um, yeah!" Gibby said, getting to his feet. "Man, I hope they haven't switched to bar soap like the rest of America…" he hurried into the bathroom, leaving Sam and Freddie on their own. Freddie glanced over at Sam, who seemed to have noticed the tension that suddenly filled the room, for she was nervously fiddling with the strap of one of her boots.

"So," she said after a moment of silence. "How's the college life, Benson?"

"Um, pretty good, I guess," Freddie said. "Made a few new friends, took some cool classes."

"Oh, that's…nice," Sam nodded.

"So a babysitting business?" Freddie said. "You know, I would've never pictured you doing something like that."

"Yeah, well, Cat and I didn't plan on it," Sam shrugged. "But the lady across the hall from us had to run out one day so we agreed to watch her daughter for a couple hours, and well, she told her friends who all had kids and they wanted us to watch their kids for them too. And since neither of us had a job and we needed money, we figured…why not?"

"Oh, that's…nice," Freddie said lamely. He looked at Sam, and suddenly, trying to maintain this civil conversation was the last thing on his mind.

"Why'd you completely block me out, Sam?"

Sam frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"What am I talking about? Ever since Carly left for Italy that night, it's like you've had these walls up between you and me, and I want to know why."

"I haven't had any _walls _up," Sam said defensively.

"Come on, Sam, you know that once Carly left, we barely spent time together," Freddie said. "Sure, you came to the Groovy Smoothie once in a while with me and Gib, and we talked some at school, but that was it. And now I don't even hear from you! You realize this is the first time we've had any contact in a year!"

"I tried video chatting you," Sam mumbled. "Once. And _you _ignored it."

"I didn't ignore it, Sam, I was in class!" Freddie said. "And right after I got out, and went right back to my dorm and tried to chat back with you, but you had already gone back offline. And what about the dozens of times I've tried video chatting _you_? Or all the times I call _you_? Or the times I text _you_?"

Sam didn't respond.

"Look," Freddie said, calming down a bit. "I get that after Carly left, you were upset. I mean, she was your best friend, and in one night, she went from being always at your side to halfway around the world. Anyone would've been upset. But still, you didn't have to shut me out. I thought you and I were friends, and friends don't stop being friends just because another friends moves away."

Sam shrugged. "I didn't think you would care that much."

"What? That you stopped talking to me?" Freddie frowned. "Why wouldn't I care?"

"You know," Sam sighed. "Because…I mean…oh come on. You know I basically made high school miserable and painful for you. I put earthworms in your locker, I glued your sneakers to the floor in gym; heck I even hacked your computer and changed your essay about Napoleon Bonaparte to an essay on Napoleon Dynamite!"  
"That was you?" Freddie said.

"You see?" Sam said. "Let's face it. The only reason we hung out was because we were either filming bits for iCarly or we were hanging out with Carly herself."

"That's not true," Freddie said at once. "What about that month when we-"

"Dated?" Sam said, finishing his sentence for him. "Well…okay, sure. But we also broke up, remember? And we broke up _because _of all that chiz I do."

"That wasn't the reason," Freddie said.

"Fine, it was because I was too 'abnormal'," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Same difference."

"You really thought," Freddie said softly. "That after all our years of knowing each other, after everything we've been through, after we _dated_, that I didn't care about you? That even without Carly around, I still would consider you an important person in my life?"

Sam looked at him. "After we broke up…how many times did you say that I didn't care about you?"

"What?"

"Eight," Sam said. "Once when we were trapped in crazy Nora's house, once when I dropped one of your cameras, once right after you got fired at the Pear store, once-"

"Okay, okay," Freddie said. "You-you actually remember all those times?"

Sam nodded. "And I figured," she said. "That since you _thought _I felt that way about you…that probably meant you felt that way about me."

Freddie took a deep breath. "Oh."

"Whatever," Sam said quickly. "It's not like anyone could really blame you. I mean, like I said; I _did _do a lot of things to you."

"Sam?" Freddie said. "You remember that night on the fire escape? When you came and found me after you told the entire Internet that you hadn't kissed anyone?"

"Sure," Sam nodded.

"Well, you remember what I told you?" Freddie asked. "I told you that I didn't want you to stop messing with me. That it would be to weird if you didn't make my life miserable. All those times you would prank me…I didn't _really _mind, Sam. Sure, I'd get a little angry for a second, but in the end…you never _actually _made my life miserable."

"Yeah, well…Carly kept me from doing a lot of things," Sam said, showing a small smile, and at that moment, Freddie realized just how much he had missed seeing it on her face everyday.

"Well, either way," Freddie chuckled. "I-I'm sorry I ever said you didn't care about me. I didn't realize how much it hurt you when I did."

"Eh, it's fine," Sam shrugged.

Freddie smiled. "So…when I call you or video chat you, you'll actually respond now?"

"We'll see," Sam said. "If I can make time in my busy schedule."

"Oh, right, I forgot," Freddie laughed. "You're running your own business."

Sam rolled her eyes as she grabbed another slice of pizza.

"Oh, and Sam?" Freddie said, watching her chew.

"What?" Sam asked, her mouth full of food.

"I do still care about you," Freddie said. "Always have, always will."

Sam looked away, but Freddie could see her cheeks reddening. "I care about you too," she mumbled. "Always have, always will."


	219. Chapter 219

_Above_

"Sam, wake up!" Carly said, shaking her sleeping best friend's shoulder.

"Carly, it's the crack of dawn," Sam mumbled, burying her head deeper into her pillow.

"It's almost ten," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Exactly!" Sam said. "You know I'm not a morning person."

"But it's not just any morning, Sam," Carly said excitedly. "It's the morning of your wedding! Today's the day you finally become Mrs. Samantha Benson!"

"I know," Sam yawned. "So can I go back to sleep now?"

"Sam!" Carly exclaimed. "How can you possibly think of sleeping? It's your _Wedding Day_! If this was me, I'd have been up since six jumping around like crazy!"

"Oh, I know," Sam said, kicking the covers off of her. "And believe me, I just can't _wait _until your wedding."

"Well come on," Carly said. "The wedding starts at four. That gives us six hours to do your hair and makeup, get you into your dress, get to the church, make sure everything's in order for the ceremony, and call and confirm the caterers for the reception. Plus I pretty much have to shadow Gibby too, and make sure he's doing all his Best Man duties."

"Carly, chill out," Sam said. "The last thing I need is for my Maid of Honor to have an aneurysm."

"You're right, you're right, I'm calm," Carly said. "Now come on. Let's start getting you ready."

"Can't I eat breakfast first?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "And I'm already ahead of you on that. I've got bacon and eggs waiting for you in your kitchen, nice and hot and ready to be devoured."

"You know me well, Shay," Sam said, getting out of her bed.

"But seriously, though," Carly said, following Sam out to her kitchen. "We do need to get moving. So after you eat, go ahead and take a shower, and then I can start getting you ready. In the meantime, I should call Gib and make sure he remembers to tell Freddie to wear the new dress shoes I dropped off for him."

She turned to Sam, who was sitting at the table, staring at her bacon but not eating it.

"Yo, Puckett-soon-to-be-Benson," Carly said. "Eat your breakfast! You've got a wedding to be in!"

"Actually…I'm not really hungry," Sam mumbled.

"What? You're always hungry," Carly pointed out. "And I even made sure I didn't accidently use low-fat bacon like last time."

"It's not that," Sam said.

"Then what is it?" Carly asked, sitting down in the chair across from Sam.

"I'm…I'm freaked out, okay?" Sam sighed.

"Why? Because you're getting married?" Carly asked.

"No, because it's supposed to rain today; yes because I'm getting married!" Sam said.

"Aw, Sam, I've read all about this in _Bride Weekly_," Carly said. "The pre-wedding jitters…classic. Look, the important thing for you to realize is that you have no reason to be nervous. It's the happiest day of your life, for crying out loud!"

"Yeah, yeah, I know," Sam said. "But…come on, Carls. What if something goes wrong? What if I forget my vows, or my parole officer shows up and decides I've done something to make me go to jail, or-"

"Hey, hey, hey," Carly said. "Are you forgetting who your Maid of Honor is? Trust me; nothing is going to wrong at this wedding. And anyway, you recited your vows to me about forty times last night; you've got them down pact."

"Yeah, you're right," Sam nodded, though she still looked nervous. She picked up her pearphone from the counter.

"Who are you calling?" Carly asked.

"Freddie," Sam replied.

"What? No!" Carly exclaimed, quickly grabbing the phone.

"Carly!" Sam frowned.

"You can't talk to your groom on your wedding day!" Carly said. "Everyone knows that. You're not allowed to have any contact with him; that means no seeing him _or _talking to him."

"Ugh, fine," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Thank you," Carly said, putting Sam's phone in her pocket. "Why'd you need to call Freddie anyway?"

"We always call each other in the morning," Sam shrugged.

"Really? Every morning?" Carly said.

"Well, other than the mornings after we-"

"Ah! For the ten millionth time, I _never_ want to hear about that!" Carly said, covering her ears. "You may be my best friend, but Freddie's practically my brother, so _gross_!"

"Sorry," Sam laughed. Then her expression turned serious. "Hey…you don't think-you don't think Freddie would, you know, not show up?"

"You mean ditch you at the alter?" Carly frowned. "No, of course not. Freddie's in love with you! Why would you think he would do that?"

"I don't know," Sam sighed. "It's just…well, no one in my family really has any luck with relationships. I mean, my mom's been engaged at least a dozen times, half my cousins only got married to keep from going to prison, and you know my Aunt Maggie's been left at the alter four times."

"Well, maybe they didn't have guys like Freddie," Carly said. "I mean for crying out loud, you two _call _each other every morning when you wake up!"

"But what if-"

"Sam, look you're not thinking straight; you're just stressed out from your pre-wedding jitters," Carly explained. "Once you and Freddie are married later today, you're going to look back to this whole think and laugh. Believe me, Sam."

Sam smiled. " Thanks, Carly. And hey, when it's your wedding, I'll make sure I do this for you too, if you need it."

"I know you will," Carly said. "Now let's move it! We have a schedule to stick to!"

…..

"Spencer, no eating in your tux!" Carly said, hurrying over to her brother and yanking the bag of potato chips out of his hand.

"Oh come on, I'm starving!" Spencer said.

"Well you can eat at the reception," Carly said. "And anyway, you need to go get Sam; it's almost time for you to walk her down the aisle."

"I was heading over there now, before _someone_ cut me off," Spencer said.

"Not in the mood, dude," Carly said. "Wait, were you just with Freddie?"

"Yeah," Spencer nodded.

"How is he? Is he as nervous as Sam?" Carly asked.

"Probably even worse," Spencer said. "Gibby and I had just calmed him down; you know, telling him he wouldn't forget his vows, that he didn't look stupid in his tux…but then like, ten of Sam's uncles and a bunch of her cousins came in and told Freddie that if we did _anything _to Sam, they'd hunt him down and stab him all over, so now he's a freaked out mess."

"Well, I'll go tell him to pull it together," Carly said. "You go find Sam. And whatever you do, don't let her tell you I told her it's okay for to eat ribs in her wedding dress!"

…..

Freddie tried to act calm as he waited at the alter. He watched one of Sam's cousin's young daughters walk down the aisle with her basket of flowers, and Guppy, who insisted on being the ring bearer even though he was fourteen, come down after her. And then Carly and Gibby came down, Carly hissing at Gibby to stop humming show tunes as they did so.

And then the guests all stood up, and Freddie knew what was coming next…

Nothing could've prepared him for how absolutely breathtaking Sam looked when she walked down that aisle. Freddie thought she was beautiful everyday, but today she looked…unbelievable. He knew he probably had a lame, goofy grin on his face as he watched her, but he didn't care. All he cared about that in just a few moments, that woman walking towards him with Spencer was soon going to be his wife.

Once Sam and Spencer reached the aisle, Spencer gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before she stepped up and stood next to him.

"Wow," Freddie whispered to her, grinning like an idiot still. "You look…wow."

"Glad to see you're so articulate on your wedding day," Sam smiled.

Freddie barely listened as the minister began to talk. He just wanted to look at Sam forever.

"And now the couple will recite their vows for one another," the minister said, finally getting Freddie's attention.

Sam took a deep breath.

"Freddie, I've known you since I was ten, when you were just the nerdy little nub who moved in across from my best friend," Sam began. "And you're still a nerdy nub, but you're also _my _nerdy nub, and even though I'm sort of…aggressive towards you, I love you. You make me laugh, you treat me like a princess, you're _always_ there for me. That's why I couldn't imagine getting married to anyone else in the world other than you."

Freddie wanted to kiss Sam right there and then, but he found the self-control to keep from doing so as he cleared his throat to recite his own vows.

"Sam," he said. "I have about fifty bruises across my body from you. But if someone came to me and asked me if I wanted to get rid of them, I'd tell them no, because each of those bruises or marks has always made me feel closer to you. I know it's probably really cliché of me to say this, but I know that today is going to be the best day of my life because I'm marrying the best girl I could ever imagine. You're beautiful, funny, smart, and even tough you try not to let people know, you're sweet and kind too. All those things are reasons why I cannot wait to marry you today, and why I've wanted to marry you for such a long time. But above all, they're the reasons that I love you more than I ever thought I could love someone."

"Aw!" Carly said loudly, causing everyone to turn to her.

"Sorry," she said quickly. "But come on; that was precious!"

Sam and Freddie could barely contain their excitement as they said their I do's, for they both knew what was coming next…

"Then by the power vested in me by the state of Washington," the minister said. "I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride."

The guests all cheered, but Sam and Freddie barely heard them and they pressed their lips to one another. Neither had ever felt this happy in their whole life.


	220. Chapter 220

**AN-Hey, Emenette574, I actually haven't read any Sam& Cat fanfics yet; is there already a page up for them? And I didn't mean to take your idea, I guess we just imagined Sam and Cat's business starting the same way, lol. Anyway, I'd love to read you Sam&Cat fanfic, if you want to give me the link?**

**Anyway, this chapter is a sequel to chapter 185, where Emma starts dating a guy that Freddie really does not like. I know I already made them break up in an earlier chapter, so I guess this one just takes place sometime before that. Hope you enjoy!**

…**.**

_Nightmare_

"Hey, mom, what are we having for dinner?" Sam's daughter, Emma, asked her.

"Um, probably spaghetti and meatballs," Sam said.

"Okay…and any chance of you changing that to lobster or something?" Emma said.

"If _you _want to go out, buy the lobsters and cook them, then be my guest," Sam said. "And I thought you loved meatballs."

"She's just freaking out because _Chase_ is coming over for dinner," Ashton said, grinning as she walked into the room.

"I'm not _freaking out_," Emma snapped.

"Then why did you spend like, half-an-hour on your hair today?" Ashton asked. "You usually run a brush through it and are done in about two seconds."

"Why don't you get a life besides watching me do my hair?" Emma said.

"Oh yeah…he's coming over tonight," Sam said.

"Mom, you _forgot_?" Emma exclaimed.

"Calm down," Sam said. "It's just dinner."

"You see," Ashton said to Sam. "Freaking out."

"I'm not-!"

"Okay, okay, chill," Sam said.

"Whatever, I'm out of here," Emma said, rolling her eyes.

"Gonna go spend an hour picking out your outfit for tonight?" Ashton said, chuckling.

"That's it!" Emma said, making grab for her sister. Luckily, Sam caught Emma just in time and held her back.

"Hey! No fighting unless your dad's in charge!" Sam said.

"She deserved it!" Emma said.

"I don't care," Sam said.

"See what I have to put up with?" Ashton said. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm late for my nail appointment with Clarissa."

"And I'm gonna go…look through my closet," Emma mumbled. "For something _non-clothes_ related!"

Sam shook her head as her twins ran off in different directions.

"Hey, I heard yelling," Freddie said, coming downstairs into the living room.

"Emma and Ashton," Sam said simply. "Oh, and in case you forgot like me, Chase is coming over for dinner tonight."

"Chase," Freddie repeated darkly. "You mean _he's _still around?"

"Yes, he's still around," Sam said.

"I _really _don't like that kid," Freddie mumbled. "Are you sure it's considered bad parenting if I go up there and forbid Emma from dating him anymore?"

"Pretty sure," Sam nodded.

"But come on!" Freddie said. "You can't tell me you like that guy; he seems like a total stubrag!"

"Hey, you finally used that word right!" Sam said. "And, sure, I'm not exactly…fond of Chase, but, you know, apparently Emma is, so we just have to deal with him. I mean, it's not like he's a criminal or anything-"

"How do _you _know?" Freddie said. "Now if you would've let me run that background check on him…Man, I wish Jason wasn't away at college. _He'd _be on my side about this. He's pretty protective of Emma and Ashton."

"Look, just be nice tonight, okay?" Sam said. "Just try making small talk and keeping anything…_non-pleasant_ inside your head."

"I'll try," Freddie sighed. "But no promises!"

"Thank you, baby," Sam said, giving him a short kiss.

"You know," Freddie smiled. "This conversation's usually reversed."

"I know," Sam nodded. "Feels weird being on this side of it…"

…..

"Hey, is that my shirt?" Ashton frowned as Emma walked into the kitchen. "Who said you could borrow my shirt?"

"Mom, dad? You want to know what time Ashton got back from her date last night?" Emma said.

"You know what, that shirt looks a _lot_ better on you," Ashton said quickly.

"Wait, what time did you-" Freddie started, but the doorbell rung and cut him off.

"Okay, everyone; be cool!" Emma said.

"Hey, Chase is on the football team, right?" Tyler asked.

"Yeah," Emma nodded as she began walking towards the front door.

"You think he'll go out back and play ball with me then?" Tyler asked.

"You are _forbidden _to talk to him, Tyler," Emma said firmly. She reached the door and opened it, revealing her boyfriend.

"Hey, Chase," she smiled, standing on her toes to give him a quick kiss. "Come on in."

"Gross," Tyler cringed.

Emma glared at him.

"What? I didn't talk _to _him, I was talking to the room," Tyler said.

"Hey, Papa Benson," Chase said, nodding at Freddie. "How's it going?"

"It's going…well, Chase," Freddie said, clenching his fists as he held back what he _really _wanted to say to this boy.

"And _hello _Mrs. B," Chase said, turning to Sam. "Man, aren't _you _looking nice tonight."

"Um, thanks, Chase," Sam said.

"So, what are we eating? I'm starved?" Chase asked.

"Meatballs," Emma replied. "Come on, let's go into the living room while we wait."

"Tyler," Freddie said as the two headed out of the kitchen. "I will give you ten bucks to go in there and be extra annoying."

"Sweet," Tyler said, taking the money from Freddie.

"You're unbelievable, you know that?" Sam said, shaking her head as Tyler ran out.

"What? I don't want them…_kissing _on my couch," Freddie said. "That couch is for sitting and enjoying television programing _only_!"

"Huh," Sam nodded. "Maybe _you _should start listening to that rule."

"Well _we're _allowed to," Freddie said. "We _bought_ the couch!"

"Whatever," Sam said, said as she placed the food down on the table. "Yo, dinner's ready!"

The three Benson kids, plus Chase, filed into the kitchen.

"Dang, Mrs. B, looks good," Chase said, sitting himself down at the seat at the head of the table. "You lucked out, Papa Benson. A wife that's good looking _and _can cook."

"Yes, well…" Freddie said through his clenched teeth. "Um, actually, Chase, you're sitting in my-"

But Sam shot him a glare.

"Fine," Freddie conceded. "I'll just sit in _this _seat…that's not mine."

"Um, so Chase?" Sam said as everyone began eating. "Emma says you're on the football team…that must be…interesting?"

"Oh yeah, it's awesome," Chase said, his mouth filled with food.

"I'm sure it's a good way to get into college," Freddie said. "If you're good enough, you might get drafted my a pretty decent school."

"Oh, I'm not gonna do that college thing," Chase said, swallowing.

"You're not going to go to college?" Freddie repeated, frowning. "I see…and you plan to get a job _how_?"

"Chase wants to start his own business," Emma explained.

"Oh yeah," Ashton nodded. "Aren't you trying to start some sort of dog walking business?"

"Not dog walking, dog _talking_," Chase said.

"Dog talking?" Freddie said. "As in…you're going to _talk _to dogs?"

"Oh yeah, they have a lot to say," Chase nodded. "One time I spent three hours talking to my dog and we totally got to know each other a lot better!"

"Um…okay," Freddie nodded. "That sounds…well, I'm sure a lot of people will bring their dogs to you to be…talked to."

"Yeah, and if you guys ever get a dog and want me to talk to him, don't worry, I'll give you a discount," Chase said. He turned to Sam. "Especially if you bring it in."

The rest of the dinner, Freddie continued to try and make conversation with Chase. But each time that boy opened his mouth, Freddie felt a stronger urge to hurt him. Once they finally had desert, Freddie was overjoyed to see Chase go.

"Aw, too bad you can't stay," Freddie said, hoping his voice didn't seem as phony as he thought it was.

"Well, I've got to go help my brother move his furniture out of his ex-girlfriend's apartment," Chase said. "Man, that chick was crazy; she tried to get my brother to get rid of his tattoo of a muffin! Can you believe that?"

"No…I cannot," Freddie said.

"I'll walk you out," Emma said, taking her boyfriend's hand.

"Well, it's official," Freddie said, walking into the kitchen, beginning to pick up the dishes from the table. "My worst nightmare has come true; my daughter's dating a complete loser."

"He wasn't _that _bad," Sam said.

"Not that bad?" Freddie said, crossing his arms. "Sam, he thinks he can talk to dogs!"

"Okay, fine, he's a loser," Sam sighed.

"And worst of all, he was _clearly _hitting on you the whole time!" Freddie said. "How weird was that?"

"Yeah, that was super creepy," Sam admitted.

"How much longer do you think we'll have to put up with him?" Freddie asked, placing the dirty dishes in the dishwasher.

"Until him and Emma break up," Sam said.

"Man I hope that's soon," Freddie said. "I don't think I can deal with this guy much longer."

"Hey, Emma's a pretty smart girl," Sam said. "Either Chase has some…worthwhile quality that we don't know about…some quality hidden _really _deep down, or she'll come to her senses soon and dump him."

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "Yeah, you're right."

"Good," Sam said. "Now I'm gonna go order fireworks online because being the responsible one in this relationship is _really _freaking me out."


	221. Chapter 221

**AN-Sorry I'm kind of going out of order with this story line, but like I've said; I do the requests in the order I get them. Anyway, this is a sequel to chapter 185, where Emma goes out on her first date with Chase. **

…

_Aging_

"Okay, where are they?" Freddie frowned, looking at his watch.

"Dude, relax," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"I will _not _relax!" Freddie snapped. "I told that stupid Chase to have Emma home by ten thirty and it is now-"

"Ten thirty-three," Quincy said, looking up from his laptop at the coffee table, where him and Ashton were watching a video on Splashface.

"Thank you," Freddie said. "They're three minutes late!"

"So maybe traffic was bad," Sam said. "I'm sure they're almost here."

"Oh man, I can _feel _myself aging from this," Freddie said, still pacing across the living room. "Have you seen my fancy stress ball, Sam?"

"Nah, you lent it to Gibby, remember?" Sam replied. "You know, when he was going through that rough time when Annie James got kicked off of _America Sings?_ You want me to get it back for you when I drop Quincy off?"

"Yes!" Freddie said. "Yes, get it so I can pretend it's Chase's head!"

"Okay, _you're _being crazy," Sam said, getting to her feet. "You ready to go, Quincy?"

"Yup," Quincy nodded, closing his laptop. "See you, Ash."

"Bye, Quince," Ashton said.

"Hey, Ashton, try calling Emma," Freddie said as Sam and Quincy headed out the front door. "I know she won't pick up if _I _try calling her."

"Okay, daddy, you're starting get scarier than mom," Ashton said. "Seriously, the movie probably ran a few minutes later than they thought; that's all."

"Maybe," Freddie nodded. "Yeah…maybe you're right…"

"Or," Ashton said. "Maybe they've actually been home for awhile now and have just been standing on the front porch making out."

"What?" Freddie exclaimed. "Ashton!"

"Night, daddy," Ashton said, turning to run upstairs.

"Ashton!" Freddie called after her. "I-You-You're grounded if that's true, young lady!"

He quickly ran over to the front window and looked out, relieved to see that his daughter was not, in fact, making out with Chase there.

Freddie sat down on the couch. He could just feel his blood pressure rising with each passing minute.  
Finally, at around ten thirty-eight, he heard the key turn in the door, and Emma walked in.

"Oh, hi dad," Emma said, spotting her father. "Where is everyone?"

"Your mom took Quincy home, and Ashton and Tyler are upstairs," Freddie replied. "You're late, by the way. By eight minutes."

"Oh…sorry?" Emma frowned.

"Just don't let it happen again," Freddie mumbled. "There's some popcorn in the kitchen, by the way."

"Sweet," Emma said, heading in to get the food.

Freddie sighed as he picked up the remote. Well, maybe a little _Galaxy Wars _could make him feel better…

"Hey, is that _Galaxy Wars_?" Emma asked, walking back into the room with the popcorn.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "It's _Episode IV: New Desires_."

"That's my favorite!" Emma said, sitting down next to him.

Freddie couldn't help but smile. Emma and Jason were the only two of his kids who shared his love of the _Galaxy Wars _movies. Ashton hated science fiction, and Tyler claimed he didn't get the point of a bunch of space robots chasing each other through space.

"You gonna watch it with me?" Freddie asked.

"Shoosh yeah, I am!" Emma nodded.

Freddie looked over at Emma as she intently watched the movie. Her and her sister both looked a lot like Sam; blonde hair, relatively short (although they _did _inherit his brown eyes). Emma, however, also seemed to have gotten Sam's attitude, save for her hatred of _Galaxy Wars_, of course. Sometimes Freddie would find himself wondering how it was possible for two personalities to be so similar…

"So," Freddie said. "Did you have fun with Chase tonight?"

"Yeah," Emma nodded. "We had fun. We saw that new spy movie; it was pretty lame, but the suckish acting actually made it sort of funny."

"And Chase was…_nice_ to you?" Freddie asked. "Because you know if he ever does anything to you, all you have to do is tell me, and I'll make him regret it."

"Yeah, right," Emma laughed. "Like _you _could beat Chase up better than I could."

"Good, you're back, Em," Sam said, walking back into the house. "Because you were giving your dad heart palpitations while you were gone."

"I wasn't _that_ bad," Freddie said.

"Sure," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "So how was your date, Emma?"

"Good," Emma replied. "You know they brought back those fancy churros at the movie theatre?"

"The ones with extra fat?" Sam asked excitedly.

"Uh-huh," Emma nodded. "I ate five."

"Well," Sam said, turning to Freddie. "You know where you'll be taking me tomorrow night."

"Whatever you say," Freddie said.

"Oh God, are you guys watching _Galaxy Wars_?" Sam asked, looking at the screen.

"Heck yeah," Emma said. "Oh shhh! This is the best part! Lou Groundrunner is about to find Tobi Quan!"

"And I'm out of here," Sam said, thumping Freddie's head as she left.

"What was that for?" Freddie called indignantly after her.

"For ruining my kid!" Sam called back.


	222. Chapter 222

**AN-This is a follow up to chapter 186, where Sam and Freddie moved to Chicago, and everyone's down visiting them. **

…

_Mind_

"Sam! Freddie! Wake up!" Gibby exclaimed, running into Sam and Freddie's bedroom. "It's Christmas! It's Christmas!"

"Gibby, shhh!" Freddie hissed as him and Sam were woken out of their slumber. "You're going to wake-"

But just then a loud cry emitted from the bassinet next to the couple's bed.

"Nice going, Gibby," Sam snapped, getting out of bed to retrieved the newborn. "We _just _got him to sleep an hour ago."

"But it's Christmas!" Gibby said. "The best day of the year!"

"It's also…six in the morning," Freddie said, looking at the clock on his bedside table.

"Hey, try sleeping in the same room as this guy," T-Bo yawned, dragging his feet into the bedroom. "Whole night he was tossing and turning…you know I need at least eight hours of beauty sleep otherwise I start to get wrinkles. And _nobody _wants a wrinkly T-Bo."

"What's going on? Why are we all in Sam and Freddie's room?" Spencer, who was still half asleep, asked, stumbling into the room.

"Gibby decided sleep wasn't really important," Freddie explained.

"Hey, what are we all doing?" Carly asked, joining the others. "I can you all from down the hall."

"Well, since we're all clearly not going to be getting any sleep," Sam mumbled. "We might as well go open presents."

"Oh and I should probably get my Santa outfit on," Spencer said.

"You just remember, the gig's mine in twenty minutes," Gibby said.

"You guys must be excited," Carly smiled as Sam, Freddie and the others began to head downstairs. "Your first Christmas as parents…pretty awesome, huh?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded, smiling down at his son in Sam's arms. "I mean, even though he doesn't know what the heck is going on right now, it's still going to be cool."

"We've had a stocking all made up for him for almost a month," Sam added.

"And Carly spent the last six weeks buying presents for the kid," T-Bo added. "Do you know how hard it was cramming all them into the car? She made me take out my special smoothie blender."

"Oh, what were you going to do with a smoothie blender anyway?" Carly asked, rolling her eyes.

"Oh, I don't know, maybe blend smoothies with it?"

"Guys, hurry up!" Spencer called from the living room. "This Santa suit is itchy!"

"Okay, okay, we're coming," Freddie said.

"Wait, wait, let me get my camera ready," Carly said, turning on her pearphone. "I want to get my godson's first Christmas on video!"

"Ho, ho, ho!" Spencer boomed as everyone gathered in the living room. "Merry Christmas, little guy!" He walked over to Sam and bent down so that he could see the infant better. "Have you been a good boy this year?"

"Well, he's two days old, so I don't think he's had the time to do anything _too _terrible yet," Sam said.

"Then good news, buddy!" Spencer said, taking the baby gently from his mother. "You get presents!"

"Wow, I'm surprised he isn't freaking out," Carly said, watching Spencer with Sam and Freddie's child. "I mean, if some weird guy in a red suit picked _me _up, I think I'd be at least a _little _scared."

"He must know he's about to get toys," Freddie chuckled.

"Smart kid," Sam said.

"Eight minutes left, Spencer," Gibby said. "Then the _better _Santa gets to show up."

"Just ignore the crazy guy," Spencer said. "And look at what I brought for you all the way from the North Pole, see? A wittle baby rattle that lights up!"

"Um, did he _make _that?" Sam whispered to Carly.

"No, don't worry," Carly smiled. "He bought it from an actual store. No chance of it bursting into flames."

"And, see, look what your Uncle T-Bo got you," T-Bo said, showing the infant a large baby bottle. "Your very own smoothie bottle! This thing can hold 36 ounces of smoothie for your sipping pleasure. Plus it's made with Jamaican plastic!"

"Hey! This is Santa-present time!" Spencer snapped. "Keep your T-Bo presents for later, if you don't mind!"

"Well!" T-Bo frowned.

"Now, let's see what else Santa brought for you, buddy," Spencer said.

"Hey, my turn now!" Gibby said, walking back into the room dressed in his Santa outfit.

"What? I still have five more minutes!" Spencer exclaimed. He turned back to the baby. "Don't listen to anything this guy says, he's an imposter Santa!"

"No, _you're_ the imposter!" Gibby said. "Look, I have toys too! How would you like your very first stuffed armadillo?"

"Armadillo?" Sam frowned.

"Yeah, you never had a stuffed armadillo when you were a kid?" Gibby said.

"Save your armadillos for _your _turn!" Spencer said.

"It is my turn!"

"I'm just gonna take him now…" Freddie said, quickly stepping over to the men and taking his son.

"Good call," Carly said. "This could turn fighty…"

"Yeah, if we're lucky," Sam said.

"Hey, careful around that bottle!" T-Bo said. "Jamaican plastic's not cheap!"

"Well, merry first Christmas," Sam said, taking the baby from Freddie just as Gibby began hitting Spencer with one of his slippers. "I promise, you'll get used to this…eventually."


	223. Chapter 223

_Extract_

"Um, hey, Freddie," Carly said as she entered Sam and Freddie's apartment.

"Hey, Carly," Freddie said brightly from the kitchen where he was mixing something in a bowl. "How was the mall?"

"Um, it was…interesting," Carly said. "Listen, you need to-"

"Hey, do you think vanilla extract or almond extract would taste best for those special cookies we saw them making on the food channel last night?" Freddie asked. "I don't really remember the exact recipe, so I'm going off of-"

"Will you put down your extracts?" Carly said. "I'm trying to talk to you!"

"Okay," Freddie frowned. "What's up? Wait…where's Sam? She went to the mall with you, right?"

"Yeah, um, that's sort of what I need to talk to you about," Carly said.

"Is she okay?" Freddie asked.

"She's fine, sort of," Carly told him.

"Sort of? What do you mean-"

"She's in mall jail!" Carly said.

"Mall jail?" Freddie repeated. "What happened? Is she still there?"

"Yes, that's why I came and got you," Carly said. "The mall cops won't let her go until she pays the two hundred dollar fine. I only had twenty dollars on me, otherwise I would've gotten her out myself."

"Oh man," Freddie said, quickly pulling off his apron and grabbing his car keys. "This is great…"

"Just hurry," Carly told him. "I warned Sam to be on her best behavior before I came here, but, well…you know how impatient she can be."

"Watch the cookies!" Freddie said as he rushed out the door.

….

"Hi, um I'm here to pay a fine to get my wife out of the jail back there," Freddie said, walking up to the desk of the mall's security office.

"What's her name?" the officer at the desk lazily asked.

"Samantha Benson."

"Benson…Benson," the officer said, typing on his computer. "Okay, here she is. Oh wait a minute…she's the lady who pushed the man into the fountain!"

"She pushed someone into the fountain?" Freddie sighed.

"Yeah, right after she hit him with this weird sock thingy full of butter," the officer replied.

"The butter sock," Freddie nodded. "Listen, I'm sorry about any…disturbances she might have caused. Can I just pay the fine and get her out?"

"Yeah, two hundred bucks," the officer said.

"Here," Freddie said, handing him the money.

"Good," the officer said, quickly counting the bills. "Follow me."

Freddie followed the officer to a back room, where there were three jail cells. He spotted Sam in the first one, sitting on the wooden bench inside.

"Alright, mam, you've been bailed out," the officer said, unlocking the cell.

"About time," Sam said, getting to her feet. "I'm starving in here! Would it kill you to put a fridge in there?"

"Sam, come on. Let's just go," Freddie said.

"Whatever," Sam said.

The couple left the security office.

"Hey, can we stop at the churro cart?" Sam asked. "I'm in the mood for-"

"Sam, _how _could you get arrested?" Freddie exclaimed. "We've been over this; you're not a teenager anymore! They're not going to send you to juvie anymore where you can get out in a couple of days! You promised me when we got together that you wouldn't get into any kind of trouble that could land you in prison!"

"First of all, it wasn't prison, it was mall jail," Sam said. "And second, it's not like I _planned _on winding up in there! That cop totally overreacted. I didn't do anything worth taking me there for!"

"You beat a guy with your butter sock and then pushed him into the fountain!" Freddie said. "I think that's the sort of thing mall cops are trained to see as something to react to!"

"Look, can we just go home?" Sam said.

"Yeah, fine," Freddie said. "But seriously, Sam; _what _could possessed you to push a guy into the fountain? Did he cut you in line at Dairy Heir? Did he bump into you? You've _got _to stop getting so worked up about stupid things and start learning to control your anger in public! I mean, look what happened!"

"For your information," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I used my butter sock on him and pushed him into the fountain because after fifteen minutes of him following me and Carly around the food court, hitting on me, I got annoyed."

"What?" Freddie frowned. "He was _hitting _on you? As in flirting with you, my wife? You _did _tell him you were married to _me _right?"

"Yes, I told him I was married," Sam said. "But the stubrag wouldn't give it up. After he kept saying that him and I should go with him to get out names tattooed on each others arm, I finally cracked and gave him what he deserved."

"So you _just _hit him with the butter sock and pushed him in the fountain?" Freddie cried. "Come on, last week when I accidently ate the last powdered donut, you nearly gave me a concussion!"

"Oh, so what happened to me "trying to control my anger in public"?" Sam smirked.

"That goes out the window when some guy tries flirting with you!"

"Wow, aren't you jealous?" Sam laughed.

"Well how am I supposed to be right after I find out my wife can't even go to the mall without being hit on?" Freddie said.

"Oh come on, you're totally overreacting," Sam said. "It was just some lame guy who works at the Pottery Barrel. He probably hit on a dozen different chicks before me today."

"Stupid Pottery Barrel," Freddie mumbled. "Well, I am returning that lamp shade I bought there!"

"That's fine, considering your mom bought it for us, not you," Sam said. "Now come, buy me a churro and then let's get out of here."

…

"So, did Freddie chew you out for getting sent to mall jail?" Carly asked as the two girls sat on Sam and Freddie's couch, watching reruns of _Metal Chef_.

"Eh, he started to, but then when he found out that the guy I pushed into the fountain had been hitting on me before, he got more upset about that then he did about the whole jail thing," Sam explained.

"That guy was such a jerk," Carly said. "I mean, you must've told him a dozen times to get lost. If I carried a sock filled with butter in my purse, I would've used it on him too, right before pushing him into a fountain."

"No you wouldn't," Sam laughed. "You're Carly. Do you even know how to _swing _a butter sock?"  
"Okay, fine," Carly chuckled. "Hey, where's Freddie now?"

"Probably hanging out with Gibby or something," Sam shrugged.

Just then, her pearphone rang.

"Hello?" she said, answering.

"Hello, is this Sam Benson?" a voice on the other end asked.

"Yeah…why?" Sam frowned.

"We have a Freddie Benson in custody at the Seattle Town Center Mall," the voice replied. "He claims to be your husband."

"Um, yeah, he is," Sam said. "But when you say in custody, do you mean-?"

"-The mall's security office, yes," the voice said. "Mr. Benson had a bit of an altercation with a cashier at the Pottery Barrel. He needs to have someone come pay the fine to release him."

"Oh, sure, I'll be right over," Sam said.

"What's up?" Carly asked as Sam hung up.

"Well, looks I'm not the only Benson who wound up arrested today," Sam grinned.


	224. Chapter 224

_Burden_

"You know, Sam, you really shouldn't eat raw cookie dough," Carly said as she watched her best friend take a bite out of a log of chocolate chip cookie dough. "The raw eggs in there can really do some wonky stuff to you. Plus-"

"Fine, Carly," Sam sighed, handing her the log. "I'll share."

"Yay!" Carly said happily, taking a bite. "Oh my God, this is good."

"Hello mom, Aunt Carly," Sam's fifteen-year old daughter, Ashton, said, walking into the living room with her twin, Emma, and Carly's daughter, Clarissa. "Aren't you both looking swell this afternoon."

"Look, can you make whatever you want quick?" Sam asked. "_Extreme Knitting _is on in ten minutes, and I'm not about to miss a show about five cranky old women in one room with a pair of sharp knitting needles."

"What makes you think we want something?" Ashton asked.

"Because you totally oversold your nice act," Emma said, rolling her eyes. "I _told _you not to be so nauseating."

"Come on, guys, what do you want?" Carly smiled. "We don't bite, you know."

"We sort of need money," Clarissa said. "Forty dollars each, to be exact."

"Forty?" Sam repeated. "For _what_?"

"For these awesome new pearphone cases that just came out today," Emma said. "They're so cool, mom. They're waterproof, flame-resistant, have built-in speakers, _and _are scented."

"Plus they come in about a hundred different colors," Ashton added.

"Clarissa, I _just _gave you fifty dollars for new shoes last week," Carly said. "_And _thirty the week before that for that cute red shirt you wanted."

"But this is a _phone case_, mom," Clarissa pointed out. "Not clothes this time."

"And I just bought you a bunch of makeup chiz, Ash," Sam said. "And I bought _you _running shoes, Emma."

"But we _need _phone cases, mom," Emma said. "Mine cracked at track practice last week, and Tyler ran over Ashton's with his skateboard yesterday."

"Guys, come on, do you think we're made of money?" Carly said. "You know, when I was your age, I didn't have an unlimited flow of money coming in. Your Uncle Spencer gave me twenty bucks a week, and I had to make that last."

"Yeah, and if I asked my mom for money, she would laugh, and then tell me to ask the cat," Sam said.

"But how the heck are we supposed to get money if you guys aren't going to give it to us?" Clarissa asked.

"You guys could get jobs," Sam said.

"Jobs?" Ashton repeated. "You expect me to balance school _and _the burden of holding down a job?"

"Calm down, it would only be part-time," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Plus, if you want money, that's pretty much your only option right now."

"I _told _you we should've asked dad," Emma mumbled to Ashton.

"Okay," Clarissa sighed. "I guess maybe working won't kill us. We'll go look for jobs now."

"Can we try to find something that doesn't really require too much work?" Emma asked.

"Good luck!" Carly called after the girls as they headed out of the room.

"Spencer gave you _way _more than twenty bucks a week," Sam grinned once the girls were out of earshot. "All you had to do was ask him in that sweet little Carly voice of yours and you'd be set!"

"Well that's because _someone _kept using my money!" Carly reminded her. "For her little shenanigans that would always either hurt Freddie somehow or get you insane amounts of food!"

"Ah yes, good times," Sam said.

"Hey, do you think we're bad parents for telling them to get jobs during the school year?" Carly asked. "I mean, that _is _a lot to handle."

"Nah," Sam said. "We're probably teaching them a valuable life skill…or something."

…

"Aw, look at them!" Carly smiled as her, Sam and Freddie walked into the Groovy Smoothie. "They look so professional in their uniforms."

They looked at Emma, Ashton and Clarissa, who were all busy behind the counter of the Groovy Smoothie, not noticing their parents.

"Yeah, it's almost sort of cute," Freddie grinned.

"Yup," Sam nodded. "Well, time to go give them some _real _work to do."

"What are you going to do?" Freddie frowned.

"Oh come on, it will be fun," Sam smiled as she walked towards the counter.

"Welcome to the Groovy Smoothie, can I-Oh, it's you," Ashton said as her mom reached the counter. "What are you guys doing here."

"Um, getting smoothies," Sam said. "Let's see…I'll have three kiwi-blueberry splats, extra kiwi, two orange jams, absolutely no pulp, five strawberry slams blended with no lumps left at the end-"

"Are you serious, mom?" Ashton frowned. "We can't make all that; it'll take forever!"

"Better get started then," Sam grinned.

"Mom, how am I even supposed to make an orange jam with no pulp," Emma, who was working the blender, asked. "It's all pulp! You're just being difficult on purpose!"

"Yeah, she is, Em," Freddie said, rolling his eyes at his wife as he joined the counter with Carly. "She'll just have her usual blueberry bananza, won't you, Sam?"

"Yeah, I was just playing with you," Sam sighed.

"And then I'll have a pineapple paradise," Freddie said.

"Oh, and I'll have a berry blitz!" Carly added.

"Okay fine, that's twelve fifty-two," Ashton said.

"Actually, Ashton, I think the correct total's eleven eighty-four," Freddie said. "You probably just added up the tax there twice. It's a common mistake with these cash registers; now that you work here, maybe you can finally convince T-Bo to switch to the newer models. It will save you an average of fifteen dollars a month in incorrect change."

Ashton glared at him.

"See, at least I'm not as bad as him," Sam said.

"Aw, come on guys, cheer up," Carly said. "Having a job's not that bad. And in no time you'll have enough money to buy those pearphone cases you want and maybe some cute outfits, some earrings, make-up-"

"Mom, _you're _the one who said the one day you had to work here when you were my age was the worst day of your life," Clarissa said as she helped Emma with the blenders. "Why would you make your own daughter suffer?"

"Oh, I was just exaggerating," Carly said as her, Sam and Freddie sat down at their usual table. "It wasn't the worst day of my life." Then she turned to Sam and Freddie. "It _was_ the worst day of my life!" she hissed.

"Yes, Carly, you've told us about fifty times," Sam said.

"You know," Freddie said. "They actually don't seem to be having too hard a time with this job."

"Yeah, it looks like they're doing fine," Sam said as she watched the girls prepare the smoothies. "I mean, other than being wazzed off at us for making them work here in the first place."

"Hey, any of you want to try some sushi?" T-Bo asked, walking over to the three with a stick with raw fish on it.

"Um, we're good," Carly frowned. "So, how are Clarissa, Emma and Ashton doing?"

"Better than _you _did when you worked here," T-Bo said. "My fancy blender still doesn't blend right!"

"Thanks again for giving them jobs," Freddie said. "They just really needed to learn the value of a dollar."

"Oh hey, that reminds me," T-Bo said, digging in his pocket. "Yo, you three! I've got your paychecks!"

"Sweet!" Emma said, running over. "Give me my money!"

"This is so exciting, our first paycheck!" Clarissa said.

"Yeah, we _have _to hit the mall after work today," Ashton said as the girls began opening the envelopes T-Bo handed them.

"Now girls, maybe it'd be smart to put away a portion of your paychecks," Freddie said. "You know, save for college, put something away for a rainy day…"

"Oh, it's their first paycheck," Carly smiled, rolling her eyes. "Let them have fun with it."

"Whoa, we earned almost two hundred bucks this week!" Clarissa said.

"What?" Carly exclaimed, grabbing her daughter's paycheck. "T-Bo! When I worked here I barely earned thirty bucks in one day! How could they earn this much in just four days?"

"Hey, times have changed since you worked here years ago," T-Bo said.

"It was not _years _ago," Carly mumbled, crossing her arms. "You're making me sound so old…"

"Wow, that's _some _first paycheck," Freddie said.

"Seriously," Sam nodded.

"Wow, you know, working isn't as bad as I thought," Emma said, smiling down at her paycheck. "I get a buttload of money to just sit around and push buttons on a blender. You guys made it seem like working was going to be this huge responsibility."

"I know," Ashton said. "Working's easy!"

"Then where's my smoothie?" Sam asked.

"It's coming," Emma replied. "It's in the blender."

"What? You aren't supposed to leave the blender unattended!" T-Bo said.

"Okay, fine, we'll go back behind the counter now," Clarissa said. "Just let us-"

But just then the blender gave a loud sputter and the lid flew off, spraying the entire restaurant with smoothie.

"Aw man, now I'm gonna have to get out the mop!" T-Bo said. "I haven't used that thing in years!"

"Gross, I have smoothie in my hair!" Ashton said as her and Clarissa hurried over to the blender to turn it off.

"Yeah, and it's not even melon mango!" Emma said, licking some off of her fingers. "That's my favorite."

"Looks like you guys are working overtime," Sam said, wiping the smoothie off of her face.

"What? But the mall closes in an hour!" Clarissa said.

"And this will take at _least _four hours to clean up," Emma said.

"My fancy blender would've never done this," T-Bo said, glaring at Carly.

"Well guys, this is what work is," Freddie said. "See? It's not so easy."

"Yeah, see, it's hard working at this place!" Carly said, turning to Sam and Freddie.

"Fine," Clarissa sighed. "I guess we can just go to the mall tomorrow. Come on, let's start cleaning this mess up."

"Yeah, okay," Ashton nodded, grabbing a towel. "Come on, Emma. You clean off the windows."

"Eh, you know, I think I'll pass," Emma said. She turned to T-Bo. "I think I'm through here. I quit."

"What? You only lasted a week!" Freddie said.

"Yeah, I know," Emma shrugged. "And now that I have a little bit of cash in my pocket, why do I need to keep working? Besides, cleaning up smoothie gunk? Not really my thing."

"So you're just gonna leave us to clean up the mess?" Clarissa said.

"That's right," Emma smiled. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have some shopping to do at Don's Novelty Emporium. I'm gonna get me an oversized spatula."

"What are you even gonna do with an oversized spatula?" Ashton frowned.

"I don't know, but I want one," Emma shrugged. "See ya!"

"Wow," Freddie said as Emma walked out of the Groovy Smoothie.

"I know," Sam said. "I didn't know Don's sold huge spatulas. I want one!"

"Well with two of us, this mess will take even longer to clean up," Ashton moaned. She glanced over to the adults. "Any chance of you guys helping us out?"

"Pfft, please," Sam said. "You don't see T-Bo paying _us _two hundred bucks a week."

"Yeah, and I promised myself I'd _never _get behind that counter again," Carly said. "Ever."

"Oh hey, and when you guys finish cleaning up here, you need to clean the urinals in the men's room," T-Bo said.

"What?" Ashton and Clarissa exclaimed.

"So, what was it you guys were saying about work being easy?" Freddie said, smiling.


	225. Chapter 225

**AN-Happy iKiss 4 year anniversary!**

…..

_Misunderstanding_

"Oh man, we're so busted," Quincy Gibson frowned as him and Emma Benson sat in the front office, waiting for the principal.

"Calm down, will you?" Emma said, rolling her eyes.

"I cannot _calm down_!" Quincy snapped. "Unlike you, I don't wind up here once a week!"

"Excuse me, I wasn't here at all last week," Emma said.

"What about when Ms. Fishbot caught you filling the coffee pot in the teacher's lounge with earthworms?" Quincy reminded her.

"Oh yeah," Emma nodded. "Forgot about that…"

"I can't believe you got me sent here," Quincy mumbled.

"What do you mean _I _got you sent here?" Emma said.

"You were the one who talked me into sneaking into Mr. Hafter's classroom this morning!" Quincy said. "If we hadn't gone in there, we wouldn't have accidently spilled coffee on his laptop! I still can't believe I listened to you and went in there."

"First of all, _you _were the one who knocked over the coffee cup," Emma said. "And second, don't pretend you didn't want to see his face when he saw the squirrel I put in his desk drawer,"

"_That's _what you were doing in there?" Quincy said. "Emma!"

"Oh come on, why are you making such a big deal over this?" Emma said. "So we got busted for accidently ruining a teacher's laptop. The school _gives _those laptops to the teachers, Mr. Hafer will have a new one by the end of the day. We'll probably get a weeks detention, tops, for sneaking into the classroom. That's all."

"That's all?" Quincy repeated. "I've never had detention before in my life!"

"Then congratulations, this must be a special day for you," Emma said.

"Oh my God, I'm going to get kicked out of pottery club," Quincy said, his eyes widening.

"You get kicked out of that lame club just for getting detention?" Emma frowned.

"They have a _very _strict set of rules," Quincy nodded.

"You _need _to get a life," Emma said, shaking her head.

"Alright, Ms. Benson, Mr. Gibson," the school principal, Mr. Thompson, said, walking into his office. "Let's get this show on the road. Now, I've taken the liberty of calling your parents-Ah, there they are now."

Sam and Gibby walked into office.

"Good to see you again, Mrs. Benson," Mr. Thompson said as Sam sat down next to Emma. "And you must be Mr. Gibson?"

"Cool, how'd you know that?" Gibby said. Quincy rolled his eyes.

"Alright, Emma, what'd you do now?" Sam sighed.

"It would appear that these two saw it funny to sneak into a teacher's classroom this morning," the principal explained. "And in doing so, they knocked over a cup of coffee and ruined said teacher's laptop."

"It was an accident, though," Emma said. "We didn't go in there to destroy the man's laptop!"

"Yes, but you _did _destroy it," Mr. Thompson said. "Now normally, students who defile school property receive detention for one week-"

"Wow, really, only a week?" Sam said. "Man, this place has gotten more lenient since I was here."

"-But, since this was a more expensive piece of property, the punishment is of course heightened," Mr. Thompson finished. "You will each receive a months worth of detention-"

"A month?" Quincy frowned. "A month!"

"Oh no, they'll kick you out of pottery club!" Gibby exclaimed.

"I know!"

Emma glanced over at Quincy. "Um, look, Mr. Thompson?"

"Yes, Ms. Benson?" the principal said.

"Quincy…Quincy didn't have anything to do with the whole incident," Emma said slowly. "It was all me."

"Huh? What are you-?" Quincy started, but Emma shot him a 'Shut up' look.

"It was all you?' Mr. Thompson repeated.

"Yeah," Emma nodded. "Quincy just happened to walk by the classroom and see me in there. He came in just as I was trying to clean up the coffee to see what I was doing. That's why Mr. Hafer caught us both in there; Quincy was just in the wrong place at the wrong time."

"I see," Mr. Thompson said. "Well in that case, I apologize for inconveniencing you by calling you down here, Mr. Gibson. It seems as if your son was just caught in a big misunderstanding."

"Hey it's cool, I was just brushing my cat's teeth," Gibby said, getting to his feet.

"Well, you should get back to class," Mr. Thompson said to Quincy.

"Um, okay," Quincy said, trying to make eye contact with Emma, but she was carefully avoiding his gaze.

"As for you, Ms. Benson," Mr. Thompson said, turning back to Emma. "Let's begin to discuss the rest of your punishment."

…..

"She got a _months _worth of detentions?" Freddie frowned later that evening.

"Yup, starting Monday," Sam nodded. "Plus, Mr. Thompson's not letting her run in that big track meet next week _and _he said if she has any more 'altercations' this semester, she'll be suspended."

"Because she spilled coffee on a teacher's laptop?" Freddie said. "What was she even doing in a classroom before school started? It's hard enough to get her in one _during _school!"

"I don't know, but I'm guessing a squirrel was involved," Sam said.

"Man, how many times can she get in trouble?" Freddie groaned.

"I know, she's giving _my _record a run for its money," Sam said.

"Well we have to do something," Freddie said. "She can't get suspended."

"I grounded her for this weekend," Sam said. "Look, the principal agreed to meet with both of us about this on Monday. Maybe we can get him to cut down her punishment. I mean, the school replaced the teacher's laptop, and this guy actually _used _that cloud thing, so his files are saved, so no harm."

"Yeah, but still, Emma needs to learn that she can't keep getting into trouble like this," Freddie said. "You think we should have a talk with her? Or maybe we should-"

Just then there was a knock at the front door, and Quincy walked in.

"Hey, Quincy," Freddie said.

"Hi, um, is Emma here?" Quincy asked. "She left her history book at school, and I figured I'd bring it back to her."

"She's in her room," Sam said.

"Cool, thanks," Quincy said, starting up the stairs.

"Too bad Quincy can't talk some sense into her," Freddie sighed, turning back to Sam. "_He _doesn't get into trouble. But Emma's not likely to listen to him, is she?"

"No, probably not," Sam shrugged. "Too bad."

….

"So you spilled coffee on Mr. Hafer's computer?" Ashton frowned, painting her nails as Emma flipped through channels on the television in their shared room.

"Uh-huh," Emma said.

"Wow, and I always thought you were more careful than that," Ashton said. "I mean, usually when you do your little stunts you never leave _any _evidence."

"Yeah, well, guess I just got sloppy," Emma mumbled.

There was a knock at their door, and Quincy opened up and walked into the room.

"Hey, Quincy," Ashton smiled. "What's up?"

"Oh, you know, just thought I'd stop by and say hey," Quincy said. "Pottery club got out a little early, so I had some time on my hands."

"Pottery club," Emma scoffed. "Seriously, it's like you're _asking _to get beat up by being in that club!"

"Don't listen to her," Ashton told him, rolling her eyes. "Hey, I'm gonna go take a quick shower, and then do you want to go meet Clarissa with me? T-Bo has a bunch of new smoothies that we wanted to try."

"Um, sure," Quincy nodded.

"Cool, just give me a few minutes," Ashton said. She headed out of the room, leaving just Emma and Quincy.

"So, um, new smoothie flavors…sounds like fun," Quincy said.

"Well, I'm not allowed to leave the house this weekend, so looks like I'll be missing out," Emma said.

"Your parents grounded you?" Quincy said.

"No, genius, I'm _choosing _to live as a hermit for the next two days," Emma said.

"And I'm gonna guess that was sarcasm," Quincy said, sitting down at Emma's desk. He opened his bag and pulled out a clay box. "Here, I made this in pottery club. I have about fifty of them already, so I thought maybe you could use it to store your brass knuckles or whatever other weird things you have in here."

"I _could _use a place to store my Fat Cake box tops," Emma said, taking the box. "Only fifty more and I can get a Fat Cake hoodie."

"Why'd you take the blame today?" Quincy asked suddenly.

Emma frowned as she set the box down on her bedside table. "What do you mean?"

"Come on, _I _was the one who spilled that coffee," Quincy said. "I should've been the one who got detention for a month. You probably could've gotten off with just a week."

"Yeah, well, let's face it," Emma said. "You wouldn't last in detention. Those kids would eat you alive, and then who am I supposed to take my aggression out on?"

"But still, you-"

"Dude, it's just detention," Emma said. "I'm used to it."

"You didn't just get detention, though," Quincy said. "Clarissa was telling me you can't compete in the next track meet, and that if you do one more thing, you're suspended."

"Oh, I'll be running in that track meet," Emma said. "You know I'm the only chance our team has of beating Roosevelt High at that meet. Trust me, coach will find a way for Thompson to let me run."

"But still, do you really think you can last the rest of the semester without getting in trouble?" Quincy asked.

"I just can't get caught," Emma grinned.

"Well…thanks, I guess," Quincy said. "That was really something, what you did today."

"Well, we couldn't have you getting kicked out of your little pottery club, could we?" Emma said, though she showed him a small smile.

"Alright, you ready to go, Quincy?" Ashton asked. "Oh, and Emma? Mom and Dad want to talk to you downstairs. And dad has his lecture face on, just FYI."

"Oh, _this _sounds like fun," Emma sighed.

"Good luck," Ashton said. "I'll try and bring you back a smoothie."

"Thanks," Emma mumbled.

"Um, well, bye," Quincy said as he stood up.

"See ya," Emma said.

Quincy gave her a small smile and then followed Ashton out of the room.

Emma sat up and slid off her bed. She was about to head downstairs, but then she caught sight of the box Quincy had given to her. She picked it up and took the lid off it. On the inside of the lid, there was a small engraving on it that read: _Thanks_. She smiled and then set the box down before setting off to endure what was sure to be a particularly long lecture from her father.


	226. Chapter 226

**AN-Hey, so this is sort of a follow up to chapter 187, where Emma gets dumped by Chase. Again, sorry to be so all over the place with these story lines, but I just upload them in the order I get them.**

…**..**

_Aid_

Freddie parked his car in front of the high school. Sam had no idea what he was about to do, but at this point, he was so fueled by fatherly anger that he didn't even care.

"Stupid Chase…" Freddie mumbled, turning off his car. "Thinking he can dump _my _daughter…"

He looked around at the sports field next to the school where the football team practiced as he got out of the car. He planned on giving that Chase a _very _firm talking to. _No one_ made his daughter cry. No one.

He started walking over to the football players. But as he approached them, he realized that they weren't practicing, but instead, they all seemed to be huddled around something. He frowned as he craned his neck to get a better look. As he got closer, he was able to see that Chase was standing in the middle of the huddle, along with…Quincy Gibson?

What the heck was Gibby's son doing here?

"Wow, you're talking really tough for someone who's probably the school's biggest loser," Chase said, stepping closer to Quincy as the rest of the football team laughed.

"Yeah…um, well," Quincy said, looking up at Chase, who towered over him. "I'm serious, Chase. You better go apologize to Emma; you were a total jerk to her, you know."

"Please, Benson was lucky I let her stick around as long as I did," Chase scoffed.

Freddie felt his fists clench, but before he could even react, Quincy beat him to it.

"First of all, you were the lucky one; Emma's too good for you. You should consider yourself lucky that _she _dated _you._ And second of all, do you even know how much you hurt her?"

"Who cares?" Chase snapped. "She's just some chick."

"Yeah? Of course you don't care," Quincy retorted. "You know why? Because you're the biggest jerk in school."

Chase frowned. "What'd you just call me?"

"A-A jerk," Quincy repeated. "And no jerk deserves to go out with Emma Benson."

"Oh, so I'm a jerk, am I?" Chase frowned, cracking his knuckles menacingly. "Well, I'll just show you what a jerk I am."

And with that he shoved Quincy to the ground, hard. He raised his fist, but luckily Freddie, who had been rooted to his spot, watching the scene, finally stepped forward and came to Quincy's aid.

"Hey!" he said, hurrying over to the huddle of guys.

"Oh, it's you," Chase said, rolling his eyes.

"Yeah, it's me, the father of that "chick" you dumped," Freddie snapped. "I'm going to give you two options, Chase. You either take your little football friends and get out of here, or you deal with me!"

Chase gave Quincy one last menacing look. "Come on," he said to the football players. "Let's get back to practice."

Freddie turned to Quincy and helped him to his feet. "You all right, Quince?"

"Yeah," Quincy winced, dusting the dirt off him. "I'm fine. What are you doing here, though?"

"Oh, I came by to do pretty much the same thing you did," Freddie smiled. "Come on, I'll drive you home."


	227. Chapter 227

_Old_

"Okay, _what_ are you doing?" Freddie frowned as he walked into the living room, spotting his wife sitting on the couch with a large wad of paper and a straw.

"Well, I was just sitting around, and then I got to thinking, you know? It's been years since I've made a good spitball," Sam replied, tearing off a bit of paper and stuffing it up her straw. "So, I decided I'd get back to it." And with that she put the straw in her mouth and blew the spitball out right at Freddie's AV club trophy from high school that was sitting on the fireplace.

"Aw, Sam! You've got spitballs all over my trophy!" Freddie exclaimed. "I got that for being the best student in Seattle as enhancing three-dimensional graphics!"

"Ah yes, your golden-geek award," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Hey, did you drop Tyler off at his friend's house?"

"Yup, just make sure you pick him up by ten tomorrow morning," Freddie said, wiping off his trophy as he sat down next to Sam.

"Bye," Emma said, hurrying downstairs towards the front door.

"Wait, wait, wait," Sam said. "Where are you going?"

"Out," Emma said.

"Out _where_?" Freddie asked.

"Oh, um, I'm meeting up with some girls from the soccer team," Emma replied. "We're gonna grab something to eat and then go hang out at that new shopping plaza."

"Okay, well just be home by eleven," Sam said.

"Alright," Emma said as she headed towards the door.

"So how long do you plan on sitting here and shooting spit balls?" Freddie asked as Sam re-loaded her straw.

"Until I get bored," Sam said, spitting a spitball at her husband's face.

"Lovely," Freddie sighed.

"Mom, dad, is it cool if I go to that under 21 dance club with Clarissa and some girls from school?" Ashton asked, walking into the living room.

"Sure, just be safe," Sam said.

"And no dancing with boys!" Freddie said.

"Whatever," Ashton said, rolling her eyes. "Bye, I'll be home by eleven!"

"Hey," Freddie said as Ashton closed the front door behind her. "You realize that we're on our own tonight?"

"Are we?" Sam said.

"Yeah," Freddie grinned. "So, would you rather sit around here and spit spitballs, or have me take you out on a nice romantic date? You know, just like in the old days."

"Hmm, I _am _craving some Pini's lasagna," Sam smiled.

"Good," Freddie said, giving her a long kiss. "Then let's get going."

"Okay, let me just grab my purse," Sam said.

"And leave your spitball shooter!" Freddie said.

"Ugh, fine!"

…

"Hi, could we have a table for two?" Freddie asked the waiter at the front of Pini's.

"There will be a ten minute wait, sir," the waiter replied.

"That's fine, thanks," Freddie said.

"Hey, when was the last time we went to dinner, just the two of us?" Sam asked Freddie as she leaned against a wall.

"Probably on our anniversary eight months ago," Freddie said. "Which means this dinner is _long _overdue."

"Yeah, it is," Sam smiled. "Hey, do you think this place still has-Wait a minute…"

"What?" Freddie asked.

"Is that-Is that Emma?" Sam asked squinting over at the restrooms where her daughter was just coming out.

"Yeah, it is," Freddie nodded. "This is where she was coming to eat with her soccer team? Seems like a weird choice for-Hey! She's sitting down with some dude!"

"Yeah, she is," Sam said. "And is she wearing a _dress_? She wasn't that dressed out when she left the house, was she?"

"No," Freddie replied.

"Huh," Sam said. "I guess…I guess she's on a date."

"A date?" Freddie frowned. "With who?"

"I don't know, I can only see the back of the guy's head!"

"Well, maybe it's not a date," Freddie said hopefully. "Maybe she's just having dinner with him as a friend."

"They're holding hands," Sam said. "Dude, seriously, chill out. She's fifteen; she can date boys. She's not a little-Holy chiz, that's Quincy!"

"Quincy Gibson?" Freddie asked.

"No, the other Quincy we know, yes Quincy Gibson!" Sam snapped.

"Really? Since when are _they _dating?"

"I don't know!" Sam said. "Oh man…my daughter's on a date with the spawn of Gibby!"

"Who needs to chill out now?" Freddie smirked. "Man, I wonder when this happened…I always thought they hated each other."

"They didn't hate each other," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "They hated each other like _we_ hated each other when we were their age. Crab, they're gonna wind up getting married, aren't they? You realize we're gonna be sharing grandchildren with _Gibby_?!"

"Sir? Madam? Your table is ready," the waiter said, approaching Sam and Freddie.

"Um, actually, change of plans, we won't be needing that table," Sam said quickly, grabbing Freddie's hand.

"Yeah, maybe some other time, thanks," Freddie said as Sam pulled him out of the restaurant.

…

"Yo, Gib?" Sam said, bursting into the Gibson house with Freddie.

"What?" Gibby asked from his sofa.

"Um, are you cutting your toenails?" Freddie frowned.

"It's Saturday night," Gibby said. "Saturday's toenail-maintenance day."

"I think you need more than a day for those things," Sam grimaced, looking down at his toenails.

"Can I help you with something, or did you just come here to abuse my feet?" Gibby asked.

"Do you have any idea where your son is?" Freddie asked.

"Sure, Huey and Kirby are at the same sleepover Tyler's at," Gibby nodded. "You dropped them off there, remember?"

"Your _oldest _son," Sam said. "Quincy."

"Oh, he said he was going to the fruit exhibit downtown," Gibby said, filing the nail on his big toe.

"Well, that was a lie," Sam said.

"What do you mean?" Gibby frowned.

"Your son, Quincy," Freddie said. "Is out on a date at Pini's with Emma."

"Really?" Gibby said. "Alright Quincy!"

"Dude!" Freddie exclaimed.

"What? Emma's good looking," Gibby said.

"She's my _daughter_!" Freddie said.

"Look, did you have any idea they were dating?" Sam asked.

"No," Gibby said, shaking his head. "But hey, isn't this great? We're practically in-laws now!"

"Ugh!" Sam cringed.

"So why are they keeping this relationship a secret?" Freddie asked.

"Dude, it's Emma," Sam said. "You know she's not a big fan of feelings and what not. She's probably scared of admitting that she's dating Quincy because, well, as weird as it may seem, she probably _really _likes him, and she doesn't want to risk screwing that up."

Freddie and Gibby stared at her.

"Wow, that was deep," Gibby said.

"Oh just go back to your toenails!" Sam snapped.

"Maybe you're right," Freddie sighed. "But what are we supposed to in the meantime? Pretend we still have no idea."

"I guess," Sam nodded. "Until they finally tell us."

"Or until you catch them making out or something," Gibby said.

"Dude!" Freddie cried.

…

"You know," Ashton said, slamming the front door as she entered her house. "Everyone else is allowed to stay out to _at least_ one o'clock. Why can't you just extend my curfew two hours?"

"Because," Freddie said simply.

"Hey, Ash?" Sam asked as Ashton was about to head upstairs.

"Yeah?" Ashton said, turning to her mom.

"Has Emma told you anything lately?" Sam asked. "You know, about her 'love life'?"

"No," Ashton frowned. "Why?"

"No reason," Sam said quickly.

"You think she really doesn't know?" Freddie asked as Ashton disappeared upstairs.

"No," Sam said. "Ashton can't lie to save her life. I guess Emma really hasn't told _anybody_."

"I can't believe she has _another _boyfriend," Freddie sighed. "She just broke up with Chase a few months ago!"

"Come on, you like Quincy, don't you?" Sam said. "I mean, even I have to admit he's not bad for a kid who has Gibby's DNA running through him."

"Yeah, I guess he's a good kid," Freddie nodded. "I _suppose _I can handle him dating Emma. He's _way _better than Chase, at least."

Just then the front door opened and Emma came in. She had changed out of her dress and was now wearing the outfit she had left in.

"Hey," she said to her parents.

"Hey, Em," Sam said. "You have fun tonight?"

"Yeah," Emma smiled. "I did."

"Good," Freddie said.

"I'm hungry, though," Emma said, taking off her jacket. "Do we have anything decent to eat?"

"There's some brownies in the kitchen," Sam told her.

"Sweet!" Emma said, running into the kitchen.

"You guys!" Carly suddenly exclaimed, running in through the front door. "Is it true?"

"What's true?" Sam frowned.

"I was just at Gibby's to get my pedicure kit back from him, and he told me that Quincy and Emma are dating!" Carly said excitedly.

"Carly, shh, keep your-"

"What?" Emma frowned, coming out of the kitchen with a brownie. "What-What did you just say?"

"Er…um," Carly said, nervously glancing at Sam and Freddie.

"Oh my God!" Ashton yelled, running downstairs. "Did I just hear that right? Emma's dating _Quincy_? Oh my God, Emma! That's so cute!"

"What? I-_No_!" Emma said, blushing. "I-No!"

"Oh my God, it _is _true!" Ashton grinned, running over to hug her sister. "See how red she's turning!"

"Ashton, why don't you head upstairs?" Sam sighed.

"Fine," Ashton conceded. "But Emma, you have to tell me _everything_, okay?"

"Great," Emma mumbled as Ashton went back upstairs. "Now I have to deal with _that _all night."

"So, um, you _are_ dating Quincy then?" Freddie asked.

"Fine, whatever, yeah," Emma groaned. "I am. How the heck did you find out though? Did Quincy let it slip? Because if he did I swear, I'm gonna pound his guts right out!"

"No, he didn't let anything slip," Sam said quickly. "Your dad and I sort of saw you two tonight at Pini's."

"You were spying on me?" Emma exclaimed.

"No, no," Freddie said. "We weren't, I promise. Your mom and I decided to go out, and well, we just happened to pick the same restaurant. But once we saw you two, we left."

"Oh," Emma said.

"And we _did _go over to Gibby's and asked him if he knew about it," Sam admitted. "And I guess he told Carly…"

"Yeah, I'm really sorry I just blurted it out to the whole world," Carly said. "But, you should really be blaming Gibby. He told me knowing that I can't keep these things secret at all."

"It's fine," Emma sighed.

"So, how long have you two been, you know, coupled up?" Sam asked.

"Do you remember that big black out a month ago when everyone was over here?" Emma asked. "When him and I got locked in the basement?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded.

"Well…that's when we…_coupled up_."

"Aw, that's sweet," Carly smiled.

"I guess," Emma shrugged. "Hey, I think I'm gonna head up to bed. I'll _try _not strangle Ashton, but if she's too obnoxious with her questions, I can't be held responsible for my actions."

"Night, Emma," Sam said.

"I should probably get going too," Carly said.

"See you, Carls," Freddie said. "Let me guess, you'll be telling Clarissa this the second you get home?"

"Please, I bet Ashton already called her and told her," Sam said.

"Probably," Carly laughed. "Anyway, I'll see you guys tomorrow."

"Well," Freddie said once Carly was gone. "This was certainly an…eventful night."

…..

**AN-I already have a oneshot about when these two get together **** It'll be up tomorrow. **


	228. Chapter 228

_Sum_

"Hey, so what's the difference between an emu and an ostrich?" Gibby asked. "I always thought they were the same thing, but then I realized they _can't _be, otherwise there would just be emus _or_ just ostriches. Not both."

Sam, who had been sitting at her kitchen table across from Gibby, eating a pint of ice cream, and Freddie and Carly, who were loading the dishwasher, all frowned at him.

"Gibby, no one was talking about anything even remotely related to ostriches or emus," Freddie said.

"Yeah, I know," Gibby said. "But I wasn't really interested in your conversation about that new deli, so I decided to change the subject."

"Gibby, you're…something," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

Just then, there was a loud clasp of thunder.

"Oh man, it's really pouring out there," Sam said, looking out the kitchen window.

"Yeah, and according to my weather app, it's supposed to be like this until at least four in the morning," Freddie said, looking at his pearphone. "Carls, Gib, you can stay here if you want tonight. You probably shouldn't be driving home in this weather."

"Cool, thanks," Carly said.

"Man, I was supposed to run to bank real quick," Sam said.

"Why?" Gibby asked.

"Because Jason burned through all his money at school, and I was gonna put more in his debit account," Sam replied. "Now I have to do it online…crab, I don't remember my password to do that."

"I'll do it," Freddie said. "But seriously, you need to start picking passwords that you'll actually-"

But just then the lights flickered, and a second later they turned off completely.

"Well…that's great," Sam said.

"I'll call the power company," Carly said, pulling out her phone.

"I'll light some candles," Freddie said.

"And I guess I'll just never know the difference between and emu and an ostrich," Gibby said.

"Gibby!"

"Mom, the power's out!" Emma said, hurrying into the kitchen.

"Is it?" Sam said.

"We were right in the middle of a movie," Emma said. "What are we supposed to do for the rest of the night without technology?"

"Hey, I have a deck of cards," Freddie said, lighting a few candles. "I can teach you to play this game I learned awhile back at math camp. See, you deal everyone five cards, then you take the sum of-"

"Well, your power won't be back on until tomorrow," Carly said, hanging up her phone.

"Tomorrow?" Emma repeated.

"Hey, if I can survive one night without electricity, than you can," Sam said.

"Yeah, we can have some fun, I mean, we have everyone here," Freddie said. "We can tell stories, do arts and crafts, make sock puppets-"

Emma turned to Sam. "Am I being punished for something or what?"

"Emma, you know your dad's a dork, you should be used to him by now," Sam said. "Listen, there's a box of flashlights downstairs in the basement. Bring them up here, will you?"

"Okay," Emma groaned, turning to leave the kitchen.

"_Why _must you brainwash our kids into thinking I'm just some lame old dorky dad?" Freddie asked.

"Sorry, baby," Sam smiled, giving him a short kiss. "But come on, sock puppets? You walked right into that one."

"Well then _somebody _won't get to participate in the big puppet show we have," Freddie said.

"I think I can survive," Sam said as Freddie put his arms around her. "Besides, you'll make it up to me…won't you?"

"Yes I will," Freddie grinned.

"Okay, we are _still _in the room," Carly said loudly.

"Whose fault's that?" Sam said.

"Come on, let's go find a board game or something," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

….

"According to your mom, Clarissa, the power won't be back on until tomorrow," Emma said, returning to the living room where her, Clarissa, Ashton, and Quincy had been watching their movie.

"Aw, and we were just about to get Mike Dillon's shirtless scene!" Ashton pouted.

"What a shame," Quincy said, rolling his eyes.

"Anyway, my mom wants you to go get that box of flashlights from our basement, Quincy," Emma said.

"She did not say that," Quincy said. "She probably told _you _to do it."

"Fine," Emma sighed. "At least help me."

"Alright," Quincy agreed. "Even though we both know I'll be lugging that box up by myself…"

"Aren't you smart, Gibson?" Emma smirked.

The two headed down to the basement.

"Alright, where are the flashlights?" Quincy asked Emma.

"I don't know," Emma said. "Look!"

"Alright, alright," Quincy said, shaking his head.

"They're probably in one of those boxes by the corner," Emma said, walking over. "I think I see-"

But suddenly, the basement door slammed shut.

"Whoa, it's pitch black in here!" Quincy commented.

"Aw, is wittle Quincy afraid of the dark?" Emma sneered.

"No! Just…just get the flashlights."

"Relax, I found them," Emma said, picking up one and turning it on. She tossed one over to Quincy. "Now get the box and bring it upstairs."

Quincy heaved the box up the stairs as Emma hurried up to the door. She turned the knob, and frowned as she realized that it was locked.

"Uh-oh…it's locked," Emma said.

"How's it locked?" Quincy said, his arms shaking from the weight of the box.

"This door's old," Emma said. "It looks on its own sometimes…" she pounded on the door. "Hey! We're locked in here! Hey!"

"And now my eardrum's busted," Quincy grimaced.

"I don't think they heard us," Emma sighed. "They're all probably in the living room playing some dorky board game."

"So we're stuck down here?" Quincy asked.

"Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse," Emma sighed, heading back down and collapsing onto one of the old beanbag chairs.

"Well, I'm sure one of our parents will notice we're gone soon and come get us," Quincy reasoned, setting the box of flashlights down.

"But I'm _bored_," Emma moaned. She looked over at the boxes. "Hey, oranges!"

"Why do you guys have a box of oranges in your basement?" Quincy asked.

"My grandma was dating this citrus farmer last month…" she explained, scooping up some oranges. "This can entertain us."

"And _how's _that?"

"We can play Boomba!" Emma grinned.

"Boomba?" Quincy repeated.

"Yeah, it's this game my mom used to play with my dad all the time," Emma said. She tossed him three oranges. "Here, just take these, walk over there…"

"Um, okay," Quincy said. "So what's the point of this game?"

"You'll see," Emma said. "Just turn around."

"Alright, but I still don't think I get-" But he was interrupted by an orange, thrown by Emma, hitting him hard in the spine.

"Ow!" he exclaimed.

"Boomba!" Emma said loudly, laughing.

"That was the worst game ever!" Quincy said, getting to his feet, massaging his spine.

"Oh man up," Emma said.

"You really bruised my vertebrate, Emma," Quincy muttered.

"So you want to play again?"

"No!"

"Well then I'm back to being bored," Emma sighed. "Just my luck, I get trapped down here with a doof who's not even mildly entertaining."

"Hey, I'm plenty entertaining," Quincy defended, sitting down in the beanbag chair next to Emma. "You want me to tell you some of my famous knock-knock jokes?"

"Sure, but then you'll have to explain my dead body to my parents, because I'm pretty sure that would just about kill me," Emma replied.

"Ashton and Clarissa like my knock-knock jokes," Quincy mumbled, crossing his arms. "Too bad I couldn't at least get stuck in here with one of _them._"

"Ha-ha," Emma snapped. She leaned back in her seat and stared up at the ceiling.

"So, how long have we been down here now?" Quincy asked.

"I dunno, twenty minutes?" Emma muttered.

There was another clasp of thunder.

"Can it stop doing that?" Emma groaned.

"Oh that's right…you don't like thunder, do you?" Quincy said.

"What? I never said-"

"Come on, Em, I remember that from when we were kids," Quincy said, smiling a bit. "Whenever it used to thunder you would try to hide under a bed or couch or whatever."

"Well…thunder's annoying," Emma snapped.

"You know," Quincy said thoughtfully. "You didn't seem to even notice the thunder earlier. Maybe if you distracted yourself from it, it wouldn't bother you so much. We could play Boomba again if you want."

"I thought I bruised your spine or something," Emma said.

"Yeah, but I guess I could deal with a slightly messed up nervous system," Quincy shrugged. "I'll go get the oranges-"

"No," Emma said. "I'm not really in the orange-throwing mood."

"Oh, okay," Quincy said. He sat back down in his beanbag chair.

The two teens were silent for a moment.

"Um, thanks, though," Emma said after a minute. "For offering…I guess."

"Yeah, um, anytime," Quincy said.

Emma hugged her arms closer to her body. "Why'd the stupid power have to go out? It's _freezing _down here without the heat!"

"Here," Quincy said, taking off his sweatshirt and tossing it to her. "I'm not that cold. You can wear it if you don't mind all the 'doof' cooties."

"I don't really have a choice, do I?" Emma said, smiling as she pulled the sweatshirt on over her T-shirt.

"You know," Quincy said. "I guess maybe being stuck down here with you isn't the worst thing that could've happened to me. I mean, let's face it; if Ashton or Clarissa were down here, they'd probably be going on about some girly chiz the whole time."

"Yeah," Emma laughed. "I mean, Clarissa's my best friend, and well, I share my DNA with Ashton, but they can be a bit much sometimes."

Quincy chuckled. "Yup."

The two were silent for another moment.

"Um, and I guess your knock-knock jokes wouldn't _actually _kill me," Emma admitted. "_Some _of them are pretty funny. Like the one about the walrus and the nun; that one's pretty good."

There was another clash of thunder. Emma, caught off guard, gave a little jump, winding up right next to Quincy on his beanbag chair.

"You _really _don't like thunder, do you?" Quincy said.

Emma shook her head. "I hate it," she admitted.

She looked at Quincy, not realizing how close their faces were. Suddenly, he didn't seem like the weird kid she took pleasure in tormenting for most of her life, but the boy who had been her best friend for just as long…the boy who, suddenly, seemed like _more_ than a friend.

She remembered all of those times her mom would tell her about how she finally got together with her dad after years or abusing and tormenting him.

"_It was probably the best feeling ever,_" Sam had always told her. _"It felt…right. But do __**not **__tell your dad that." _

Without her even noticing, her and Quincy's faces seemed to move closer, until they were only about a few centimeters apart. And before Emma could even register the fact that she never took the time to realize just how green Quincy's eyes were, he had closed the gap between them, kissing her.

"_Every time, even now, there are sparks there," _Sam's voice echoed in her head as she felt Quincy's lips on hers. _"Every time he kisses me. But seriously, you tell your dad this, and you are grounded until college." _

Emma had usually pretended to gag at those words from her mother while Ashton had been the one who would continue to hound her for more romantic details. But suddenly…she got it.

Quincy pulled away from her after a minute, blushing furiously. He looked down at his feet. "Um…s-sorry."

Emma, who was trying to hold back a blush herself smiled. "It's cool."

….

"Ha! And now I'll just take five hundred bucks from you, Fredbat, for landing on my property," Sam said happily, grabbing a fake bill from her husband. "Oh look, that was the last of your money. Looks like your out."

"You're cheating," Freddie mumbled, crossing his arms moodily. "You should still be in jail! How'd you even get out?"

"Mama has her ways," Sam smirked.

"I wanted to just play charades," Carly sighed. "But _noooo_, no one wanted to listen to Carly."

"Hey, this candle's almost burned out," Gibby commented, pointing to one of the candles on the coffee table that was almost completely melted.

"Well I told Emma to get the flashlights forty-five minutes ago," Sam said. "Where is she?"

"Her and Quincy went to get them awhile ago," Clarissa said.

"What happened to them then?" Carly asked.

"You know what," Sam said. "I bet it was that stupid lock on the basement door; it sticks sometimes. I keep telling nubby over here to fix it-"

"When have I ever been good with tools, Sam?" Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"See what I put up with?" Sam said, getting to her feet. She headed over to the door that led down to the basement and fiddled with the lock.

"Emma?" she called, opening the door. "Quincy? You down here?"

"Um, yeah, hi mom," Emma said, quickly getting to her feet.

"How long were you two down here?" Sam asked. "This whole time?"

"Yeah, we sort of got locked in," Quincy nodded.

"Why didn't either one of you call us?" Sam asked.

"We tried, but you didn't hear us," Emma said.

"I meant on your _cell phones_," Sam said. "You both have yours, don't you?"

"Oh," Emma said. "Forgot about that…Well, I'm gonna head upstairs and go through my socks…Quincy, come help me figure which ones I want to keep and which ones I want to donate to the elderly."

"Yeah, okay," Quincy nodded.

"Wait, why are you getting rid of your-" Sam started, but the two teens were already heading upstairs.

Sam frowned as she watched them head up. Was Emma wearing Quincy's sweatshirt?


	229. Chapter 229

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 188, where Freddie teaches his twins how to slow dance for a school dance. **

…**.**

_Neutral_

"Jason, for the fifth time, no!" Sam said, rolling her eyes as she opened the fridge, looking for something to eat.

"Mom, come on, why not?" Jason moaned. "I have my license now!"

"You've had it for _one _day," Sam pointed out.

"Exactly!"

"What's going on here?" Freddie asked, walking into the kitchen.

"He's just begging for the car again," Sam said, pulling a container of leftover lasagna out of the fridge.

"Oh," Freddie said.

"Dad, I just want to borrow the car to drive to El Taco Guapo and hang out with my friends for a little bit," Jason pleaded.

"Jason if your mom said no, then the answer's no," Freddie said, pouring himself a glass of juice.

Sam sighed and gave Freddie a look. He shrugged.

"Fine," she conceded, handing Jason her car keys. "But you're _only _going to El Taco Guapo. If we find out you've been anywhere else, you're loosing your license."

"Thanks!" Jason yelled as he hurried out the front door.

"So, are the girls still getting dressed for the dance?" Freddie asked.

"Ashton is, I think," Sam said. "Emma's been done for awhile already. She's just watching T.V. up in her room."

"Hello Bensons," Carly said, letting herself into the house along with her daughter Clarissa, who was already dressed for the dance.

"Hey, Carls," Sam replied. "Looking good, Clarissa."

"Thanks," Clarissa smiled.

"Emma and Ashton are upstairs," Freddie told her.

"So guess what _you _two are doing tonight?" Carly said to Sam and Freddie as Clarissa hurried upstairs.

"Well I have three episodes of _Plastic Surgeries Gone Bad_ on the DVR," Sam said.

"And I was going to work on my new model train," Freddie said.

"Wrong," Carly said. "You two are coming to the dance to help me chaperone."

"Yeah, okay Carly," Sam scoffed. "Like that'll ever happen."

"Come on guys, please?" Carly begged. "I had two chaperones just call and cancel and unless I can replace them, we're going to have to cancel the dance."

"So rope Gibby and Tasha into it," Freddie said.

"I can't; Gibby's got Pilates and Tasha has some modeling gig," Carly said. "Come on, guys, you two are my last hope!"

"But I don't want to-" Sam began, but just then, Emma, Ashton and Clarissa came downstairs.

"Well, what do you think?" Ashton asked, spinning around in her new dress.

"Very nice, Ash," Sam smiled.

"Can't believe I have to wear a dress to this thing," Emma mumbled, pulling at the light blue dress she was wearing.

"You look nice, sweetheart," Freddie told her.

"Yes," Carly said. "And wouldn't it just be a _shame _if these girls here, who are all dressed up, ready for their first formal school dance, couldn't get to go because their parents just wanted to stay home and watch plastic surgeries and play with trains? The gentle pitter-patter of their tears hitting their pillows tonight keeping you awake as you lay there, basking in your own guilt?"  
Sam glared at Carly. "You're crafty, aren't you…fine, well chaperone the dance."

"Yay, thanks a lot, you guys," Carly said.

"I guess I'll go drop Tyler off at my mom's, and then we'll get going," Freddie sighed.

….

"Is!"

"Isn't!"

"Is!"

"Alright, what are you two going on about _now_?" Carly sighed, walking over to Sam and Freddie, who were hanging out by the refreshments table.

"Sam thinks a hammer is the most efficient tool, but I say it's totally overrated," Freddie said.

"You wouldn't be saying that if you actually knew how to use one!" Sam snapped.

"Oh my God," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Has being at this school again reverted you back to your teenage selves or something?"

"Carly, don't you think a hammer's only purpose is to just ram nails into wood?" Freddie asked.

"I like to stay neutral in your little arguments," Carly said. "Especially the ones that are perhaps the most pointless things I've ever heard."

"Well we're bored," Sam said. "There's nothing to do at a seventh grade dance."

"Well _you _can come help me deal with a big ice emergency out in the parking lot," Carly said, grabbing Sam's wrist.

Freddie watched as his wife and Carly hurried out of the school's cafeteria. He turned back to the dance floor, where he spotted Ashton and Clarissa dancing with a group of kids. Much to his despair, there were _boys _in that group…He'd have to remember to keep an eye on them.

"Hi, dad," Emma said, coming over to the refreshments table, grabbing a brownie.

"Hey, why aren't you dancing?" Freddie asked.

"I was, but then I realized I hadn't eaten anything for forty-five whole minutes," Emma said.

"Ah," Freddie chuckled.

"Cool, brownies," Quincy Gibson said, joining them at the refreshments table.

"Hey, Quincy, how's it going?" Freddie asked.

"Repulsing girls on the dance floor?" Emma smirked.

"Emma…" Freddie warned her.

"Freddie," Carly said, hurrying back over to the table. "I need you to carry some bags of ice in."

"Why's the dance need so much ice?" Freddie frowned.

"Oh just come on," Carly said, grabbing his arm and pulling him away.

"Are you putting salsa on your brownie?" Quincy frowned as he watched Emma spoon the red goo onto her brownie.

"What? I like spicy _and _sweet," Emma defended.

"Whatever," Quincy said, grimacing as Emma took a bite of her creation.

Just then the music, which had previously been a fast-paced pop song, changed to a slow song.

"Great," Emma mumbled, watching as the teenagers on the dance floor began to couple up.

"You're not gonna dance?" Quincy asked. "I thought you were all excited to dance with that Mikey dude."

"Eh, dude out turned to be a total loser," Emma said. "I was talking to him earlier today and you know he doesn't even follow professional wrestling? How lame is that?"

Quincy rolled his eyes. "But Ashton told me your dad taught you and her to dance just for tonight?"

Emma shrugged. "There will be other dances."

"Do you, you know," Quincy started. "Maybe want to dance with me? My dad made me take father-son ballroom dancing when I was younger."

Emma laughed. "How do you have a professional model for a mother, but wind up with a dad who's even worse than mine?"

"Just the way the universe works, I guess," Quincy said. "So, you want to dance?"

"Hmm," Emma said. "I guess that would get that creepy dude over there to stop staring at me. Let's hit the dance floor, Quinclump."

….

"Okay," Carly said as her, Sam and Freddie came back into the cafeteria. "A potential ice disaster avoided thanks to us."

"I can't feel my hands," Sam mumbled.

"Aw, look, everyone's slow dancing," Carly said, ignoring Sam's comment as she looked out on the floor of middle schoolers. "There's Clarissa and Ashton dancing with those two guys from the soccer team."

"Stupid soccer players," Freddie said darkly.

"Where's Emma?" Sam asked.

"She's just over there, dancing with Quincy," Freddie replied. "At least that's _one _daughter I don't have to worry about and-Hey! Hey, that soccer player's getting too close! Hey, kid!"

"And he's gonna make a scene," Carly sighed.

"Yup," Sam nodded. "Hey, you think there's any of those sprinkle cookies left?"


	230. Chapter 230

_Size_

"Jason!" Sam called upstairs. "Come on, we need to get going!"

"Sam, no yelling, remember?" Freddie told her. "It's not good for the baby to have your blood pressure up."

"I'm not 'yelling'," Sam told her husband. "I'm just saying something loudly. I'm not gonna get stressed out from _that_."

"Where are we going?" Sam and Freddie's four-year old, Jason, asked, coming downstairs with an armload of toys.

"_You_," Freddie said. "Are going to stay at your Aunt Carly's for a little while. Remember what we told you last night? Mommy's going to the baby doctor to make sure your little brother or sister is doing okay."

"Oh yeah," Jason said. "And you get to find out if the baby's a boy or a girl too, right?"

"Yup," Sam nodded. "Aren't you excited?"

"Can you try and make the baby a boy?" Jason asked.

"Doesn't work that way, kiddo," Sam chuckled. "But hey, I'd bet you'd have just as much fun with a sister as you would with a brother. We just want the baby to be healthy, right? It doesn't matter if it's a boy or a girl."

"I still get to be a big brother, even if the baby's a girl, though?" Jason asked.

"Yes," Freddie smiled. "No matter what, you still get to be a big brother."

"Good," Jason said.

"Now come on, go get in the car," Sam told him. "Otherwise we'll be late for the appointment, and _I'll _have to listen to daddy go on and on."

"Well if you didn't sleep in until noon," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Hey! _This _is getting my blood pressure up!" Sam snapped.

…

"Hey, Carly," Sam said as her, Freddie and Jason walked into Carly's house.

"Hey," Carly smiled. "Jason, I just made some cookies; they're in the kitchen."

"Yay!" the four-year old cheered as he ran off to the kitchen.

"You sure you can watch him?" Sam asked. "I mean, you _do _have Clarissa now."

"Yeah, we can always bring him with us and have him sit in the waiting room," Freddie nodded.  
"Guys, it will be fine," Carly assured them. "I can handle a four-year old along with my one-month old. I mean, you two will be doing the same thing in, what, five months?"

"Yeah, I guess," Freddie said. "Well, he brought enough stuff to entertain himself, hopefully he won't be too much trouble."

"Aunt Carly?" Jason asked, coming back into the room with a cookie in one hand and a large picture book in the other. "Can I read Clarissa my dinosaur book?"

"Sure," Carly replied. "She's over there in her playpen." She turned to Sam and Freddie as Jason hurried off to Clarissa. "He can read now?"

"Nah, he just likes looking at the pictures and making up his own stories," Sam said. "Alright, well, we'd better leave. My appointment's in twenty minutes."

"Oh, and today's the day we find out if you're having Clarissa's future best friend or her future husband."

"You want our kids to get married if we have a boy?" Freddie asked, amused.

"Shoosh yeah!" Carly said. "How cool would it be if we got to share grandchildren?"

"Bye Cars," Sam said, chuckling.

…..

"Alright, Mrs. Benson, just have a seat right up there," the nurse told Sam once she had changed into a paper gown. "The doctor will be with you in just a moment."

"Cool," Sam nodded, sitting herself down.

"So," Freddie said. "You excited to find what we're having?"

"Uh-huh," Sam smiled.

"Just think…two kids running around," Freddie said. "Jason and this little one. Think we're ready for it?"

"It's too bad if we're not," Sam said. "It's happening."

"Good afternoon, Mr. and Mrs. Benson," Sam's doctor said, walking into the room. "How have you been?"

"Pretty good," Sam replied.

"Are you still experiencing morning sickness?" the doctor asked, opening up Sam's folder.

"Yup," Sam nodded. "And afternoon sickness…and evening sickness."

"Yes, unfortunately, that's quite common, as I'm sure you remember from your first pregnancy," the doctor nodded, rubbing some gel onto Sam's abdomen. "And have you begun experiencing any mood swings?"

"No," Sam said.

"Yes," Freddie replied at the same time, earning him a glare from his wife.

"I see," the doctor said, jotting a few things down. "Anyway, are you both ready to see your baby?"

"Yeah, and we can find out the sex today too, right?" Sam asked.

"If the baby is positioned right, then yes," the doctor nodded, turning on the monitor by Sam. "Just a moment…"

He began moving the ultrasound device over Sam's stomach.

"…And here we are," the doctor said, pointing to the monitor. Sam and Freddie looked and saw the faint outline of what looked like a small head.

"That's the baby?" Freddie asked.

"Yup," the doctor said, moving the device some more. "Now, let me see if I can tell you the gender…there we are. Now you both want to know?"

"Yeah," Sam said anxiously. "What is it? Boy or a girl?"

"You two are having a baby girl," the doctor smiled.

"A girl?" Freddie repeated, his face lighting up. "You hear that, Sam? We're gonna have a daughter!"

"Yeah, we are," Sam laughed.

"Everything looks good with her," the doctor continued. "Nice, strong healthy heartbeat…Hmmm, now _this _is interesting…"

"What?" Freddie frowned.

"Is something wrong?" Sam asked, concerned.

"Just a moment…" the doctor said, fiddling with the device. "Aha! I see it now! _Well_, this is certainly a surprise."

"What?" Sam and Freddie both asked anxiously.

"Mr. and Mrs. Benson, it looks like you'll not only be having one daughter, but another one as well," the doctor said.

"Huh?" Sam said, looking at Freddie.

"Congratulations," the doctor said. "You're having twins."

"T-Twins?" Freddie stuttered. "As in two? Two babies?"

"Yes, two," the doctor chuckled. "We must've missed this the first time because the heart rates were in sync, and one must've been directly behind the other."

Sam and Freddie exchanged shocked looks. "Wait…you-you're serious?" Sam said.

"Very serious, Mrs. Benson," the doctor said. "Now, baby number two seems to be just as healthy as her sister, perhaps a bit smaller, but nothing to be concerned with. Everything's going along just smoothly so far."

"I, um, great," Freddie said, clearly still stunned at the news he had just received.

"I realize this is quite a shock," the doctor said.

"You think?" Sam said, still staring at the monitor.

"I'll leave you two to digest the news while I go and get you two a DVD of this sonogram," the doctor said, clicking off the monitor. "I'll be back in a moment."

"I-how-how can we be having twins?" Freddie asked as the doctor left the room. "That's two babies, Sam!"

"Yeah, I know, Fredley, I _am _a twin, remember?" Sam snapped.

"Two babies," Freddie repeated. "Well…there's nothing we can do now but just embrace this, I guess. I mean, sure, two babies means double the work, but it's also double all the good stuff too."

"Yeah," Sam nodded slowly. "Yeah, you're right."

"And, sure, we're both a bit…surprised now," Freddie said. "But we'll get used to the idea soon, I'm sure."

"Yeah," Sam said. "Well…I guess you know what this means?"

"What?" Freddie asked.

"I'm gonna be huge!" Sam said. "Two babies…Oh man, I'm gonna be practically double the size I was when I had Jason!"

"Baby, relax, it'll be fine," Freddie assured her.

"Easy for you to say!" Sam snapped. "Aw, you know what this means? I need to go buy new maternity clothes, which means Carly will want to make me buy all these gross dresses like she did last time!"

"Yeah…can't help you with that," Freddie said.

….

"So? What's is it?" Carly asked the second Sam and Freddie walked into her house after the appointment. "Boy or a girl?"

"Well, it doesn't look like Clarissa's getting a husband from us," Sam said.

"So it's a girl?" Carly said excitedly. "Oh my God! Clarissa's going to have a best friend!"

"Make that _two _best friends," Freddie smiled.

"Two?" Carly frowned.

"We're having twins," Sam grinned.  
"T-Twins?" Carly repeated. "Are you serious? That's awesome!" She threw her arms around her best friends. "I can just see it now, our girls playing together, going to school together, going on triple dates-"

"No, no, no," Freddie said. "Unless those dates are happening when they're thirty."

"Aw, and you're already an overprotective dad, how cute," Carly laughed.

"Mommy! Daddy!" Jason exclaimed, running downstairs. "Did you find out if the baby's a boy or girl?"

"Yup, we did," Freddie said, scooping his son up in his arms. "And we have a surprise for you. Instead of just one baby, mommy's having two."

"Two?" Jason said, his eyes widening.

"Uh-huh," Sam grinned. "You get two little sisters, Jason. They're gonna be twins."

"Like you and Aunt Melanie?" Jason asked.

"That's right," Sam said.

"We know you kind of wanted a little brother," Freddie said. "But hey, you're gonna be very happy with little sisters, I promise."

"I can't wait!" Jason said happily, jumping down from his fathers arms and running over to his mother. He put his hands on her stomach. "Can they come out now?"

"Not for five more months, Jason," Sam said.

"Five months?" Jason pouted. "That'll take forever!"

"Aw, I'm sure it will come faster than you think," Carly told him.

"Yeah, and in the meantime, you can help us get ready for them," Freddie said. "There's still a lot we need to do, especially now that we're having two."

"Can I clean out our storage room for them?" Jason asked.

"Sure," Sam said.

"Yay!" Jason cheered.

"Now why don't you go get your toys and we'll head home," Freddie told his son.

"Okay!"

"Wow, you're going to make your four-year old clean out the twins bedroom for you?" Carly asked as Jason hurried off.

"Hey, he wants to!" Sam said. "And relax, we won't make him do any of the hard stuff. But if he wants to sort through boxes, who am I to stop him?"


	231. Chapter 231

_Agency_

"Aunt Carly, guess what?" three-year old Jason Benson asked excitedly, hurrying into Carly's apartment, along with Sam. "Mommy let me eat spaghetti for breakfast today!"

"Oh, did she?" Carly smiled. "I bet that was fun."

"Yeah!" Jason nodded.

"Hey, you know what? I just bought a huge box of crayons," Carly told him. "And they're sitting on the kitchen table…unopened…waiting to be used."

"Can _I _use them?" Jason asked.

"Of course you can, that's what they're there for!" Carly laughed.

As Jason ran off into the kitchen, Sam collapsed onto the couch.

"Hey," Carly said, sitting down next to her best friend. "How you've been?"

"Just peachy," Sam mumbled.

"Not really a peachy tone there," Carly said. "Look, Sam I know its been difficult this last year-"

"Yeah, having my husband in the middle of a war-zone is _just _what I've always dreamed of, Carly," Sam snapped. Then she sighed. "Sorry…it's just, you know, it's stressful."

"I know that, Sam," Carly said, patting Sam's back. "I grew up with a dad in the Air Force, remember?"

"I know," Sam nodded. "But…come on, _why'd _Freddie's tech agency have to get drafted to go help the military over there? If their technology's so advanced, shouldn't they be able to help them _without _going all the way to the Middle East? And its been _eleven months_!"

"Do you know how much longer he has to stay?" Carly asked gently.

"When I talked to him, he said at least three more months," Sam answered miserable. "But that was a month ago! He hasn't called me since then! Or sent a letter or anything! What if something happened to him?"

By this point Sam was practically in tears. Carly scooted closer to her and pulled her into a hug. "Well, maybe something came up and Freddie just _can't _contact you, but is perfectly fine."

"I wish I was as optimistic as you," Sam said, wiping her eyes. "And then there's Jason, who tells me at least three times a day that he misses his daddy. And he keeps begging me to pull up a web chat with him, but I _can't _because Freddie's never online anymore!"

She grabbed Carly's remote from the coffee table and flipped on the television.

"What're you doing?" Carly asked.

"Watching the news," Sam replied. "Maybe I can at least find out if anything's happened over there."

"Sam, don't do that to yourself," Carly said, but Sam ignored her as she flipped through the channels until she found a news station.

"And in other news," the anchor on the channel Sam stopped at said. "There's been an explosion at an American base in Iraq. No fatalities have been reported, but there have been several injuries-"

"Sam," Sam said quickly, grabbing the remote from her and turning off the T.V. "That's doesn't-"

"What if that was Freddie's base?" Sam moaned. "What if he was in that bombing? Huh?"

"Sam, calm down, you don't want Jason to hear," Carly said softly as Sam began to sob.

"I can't _take_ this Carly!" Sam said, crying into Carly's shoulder. "I just want him to be home already!"

"I know you do," Carly said. "But you'll get through this, okay? Look, I know you're freaked out, but the lady said there weren't any fatalities in that bombing, so-"

"But what if Freddie's arm got blown off or something?" Sam said. "What then?"

"Sam, listen to me," Carly said, handing Sam a tissue. "I know this is killing you, but you've got to just keep hanging in there. Freddie's time there will be up before you know it, and he'll come home."

Sam wiped her tears away with the tissue. "I hope he knows he's pretty much giving me a mental breakdown here."

"I'm sure it's killing him not seeing you and Jason as much as it's killing you," Carly said. "Now why don't you go wash up; you've got mascara running down your face. And I'll go order some pizza. Meat Slam for you?"

"I'm not hungry," Sam mumbled, getting to her feet. "But I'm sure Jason is; see what kind he wants."

Carly sighed as Sam headed to the bathroom and closed the door behind her. It broke her heart to see her usually tough and funny best friend like this. Ever since Freddie and the entire tech agency where he worked got called overseas, she had been a mess. But now that she couldn't even talk to her husband, she was much, _much _worse.

"Hey, Jason," Carly said, walking into the kitchen. "I'm ordering pizza. What kind do you want?"

"Pepperoni, please," Jason replied, setting his crayons down. "Look, Aunt Carly, I drew a picture for daddy when he comes home. It's of Nug Nug from _Galaxy Wars_. Mommy let me stay up and watch all the movies with her last night, and the night before that."

"Wow, your dad's going to really love that, Jason," Carly smiled.

"Mommy, look!" Jason said as Sam walked into the kitchen, her face tearstained and her eyes blotchy. "It's for daddy! When can I give it to him?"

"I'm still not sure, sweetie," Sam said softly. "Soon, I hope."

Carly watched as Sam picked up Jason, the three-year old explaining his drawing to her. She wished there was something she could do. Then she had a sudden thought. Maybe there _was_ something she could do…

….

"Hey, Spencer," Carly said, walking into her brother's loft later that day.

"What's up, kid?" Spencer asked, looking up from the sculpture of a buffalo he was working on.

"Sam just left my place," Carly said.

"How is she?" Spencer asked, putting his sculpting tools down.

"Terrible, as usual," Carly sighed.

"Oh man, did she hear about the bombing over there?" Spencer asked.

"Yup," Carly nodded. "Which of course got her even more worked up. I know she's trying to hold herself together for Jason, but she's really starting to loose it, Spencer."

"Poor Sam," Spencer said, crossing her arms. "And she still hasn't heard from Freddie?"

"No," Carly said. "I'm thinking outside communication from his base is being limited, you know, like what would happen to dad sometimes."

"Oh yeah," Spencer nodded.

"Anyway," Carly said. "Do you still have that number of dad's old friend? You know, the one with the hook for a hand?"

"Captain Hook, you mean?" Spencer asked, pulling out his pearphone.

"Yes him, and he's told you a million times he doesn't think it's funny when you call him that," Carly said. "So do you have the number?"

"Yeah," Spencer nodded. "But why?"

"I just want to give him a call," Carly said, pulling out her own phone, dialing the number. "Maybe see if he can do my one little favor…"

…..

"Jason, you know you aren't supposed to play with your Clay Dough in the sink," Sam said, trying to unclog the drain in the bathroom, which was currently filled with blue and red Clay Dough.

"But I was trying to make a boat," Jason said. "And boats have to be in water, mommy."

"Well, guess I'm calling the plumber later," Sam said, giving up the task. "But seriously Jason, no more Clay Dough in the this sink or any other sink, okay?"

"Okay," Jason nodded.

"Good, now go get your jacket," Sam said. "We're eating lunch at Uncle Spencer's."

"Is it spaghetti tacos?" Jason asked hopefully.

"Yup," Sam nodded.  
"Yay, I love spaghetti!" Jason said, running off to get his jacket.

Sam couldn't help but laugh. For the past two weeks, Jason had been going through a phase where he'd eat spaghetti for every meal if he could. He'd even convince her to put spaghetti on top of his ice cream a few times. Sam could just imagine Freddie laughing about this while at the same time trying to get Jason to eat a 'healthy variety of foods'. She felt her heart sink. She just wanted to have that nub back already…

"Mommy, I'm ready!" Jason called, bringing her out of her thoughts.

"Okay, I'm coming!" she said.

The two arrived at Spencer's loft a few minutes later. They cold smell the spaghetti tacos and garlic bread before they even opened the door.

"I'm hungry!" Jason said as soon as Sam opened the door.

"Don't worry, we have plenty of spaghetti for you," Spencer said. "But…you can't have any yet. You either, Sam."

"Why?" Sam frowned.

"Because," Carly said. "The elevator's not working, and Spencer's being stubborn and refusing to let anyone do anything around here until it gets fixed."

"Hey, how am I supposed to go places with a broken elevator?" Spencer defended.

"I don't know, maybe the stairs?" Carly pointed out, rolling her eyes.

"But that's so much exercise," Spencer said.

"I want to try and fix it!" Jason said. "Can I? Please? Please?"

"Go for it, little guy," Spencer said. He turned to Sam. "And since _you _can actually handle tools, you think you can go have a look at it too?"

"Fine, if it means we get to eat any faster," Sam said. She walked over to the elevator where Jason was pushing the down button rapidly.

"Spencer, you idiot, the elevator's not even broken!" Sam said. "You just have the lock switch on!" She flipped the switch. "There. All fixed."

"I helped too, right?" Jason asked, still pushing the down button.

"Yeah," Sam smiled. "Couldn't have done it without you, kid. Now can we eat already? I swear, I'm about to-"

But just then the elevator dinged from Jason pushing the button. The door slid up, and out walked Freddie.

"Daddy!" Jason exclaimed. He ran over to his dad and jumped into his arms.

"Hey, Jason!" Freddie laughed, kissing his son. "Whoa, you're so big now!"

"That's because I'm three now," Jason said.

"Ah, that must be it," Freddie said. And then he turned to Sam, who was standing over by the counter looking stunned. He set Jason down. "Hi," he said softly. He held his arms out for her.

That was all it took for Sam to unfreeze and run over to Freddie at top speed, tackling him to the ground.

"You-You're home?" Sam said as the two sat up, still tangled together. "But-how? I-When?" But she decided that she could wait for the answers, for she then pressed her lips to his, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"I missed you _so _much, Sam," Freddie whispered when they finally pulled apart.

"You better have!" Sam said. "You've been gone for a year!" She turned to Carly and Spencer, who were watching the scene, grinning.

"Did you guys…?"

"Surprise!" Carly said.

"But how'd you do this?" Sam asked, her arms still around Freddie's neck.

"I called one of my dad's friends, he's pretty influential," Carly said.

"Yeah, this guy was able to let my entire agency go," Freddie said.

"You guys are the best," Sam said, giving Freddie another kiss. She held out her arm for Jason to join them.

"So what have you been up to?" Freddie asked as Jason sat down on his lap, still beaming.

"I can write my name now!" Jason said. "And I can spell fish and dog and pig. And I drew you a gazillion pictures! And I build a big tower in my room with my Jumbo Blocks, and I can count to four hundred and eighty nine!"

"Wow, you've been busy," Freddie laughed.

"And look, I made you guys spaghetti tacos to go," Spencer said, handing Sam a large box. "Because I know the last place you three want to be right now is here. Go home!"

"Yeah, we'll all catch up tomorrow," Carly said. "But for now, go be a happy little Benson family."

"Thanks," Sam smiled.

"Come on, daddy," Jason said, pulling on his father's hand. "I want to show you my new stuffed dragon! His name's Scaley, because he's covered in scales."

"Sounds appropriate," Freddie said, getting to his feet and helping Sam to hers. He turned to Carly and Spencer. "Thanks again so much for doing all this…You have no idea how perfect this is."

"Yeah," Sam said, holding her husband's hand with no intention of letting go anytime soon. "I don't even know how to pay you back for this."

"Don't worry about that," Carly laughed. "Now seriously, go, before Jason explodes!"


	232. Chapter 232

_Catalogue_

"Hey, guess who just got hired to make a fancy sculpture for the new Laundromat across the street?" Spencer said excitedly, coming into his apartment. "That's right, me!"

"Who still uses a Laundromat?" Sam frowned. "Either by your own washing machine or wash your clothes in a lake."

"What sort of sculpture does a Laundromat want?" Freddie asked, looking up from his pearbook.

"I'm making Sudsy, the loveable bubble character," Spencer replied. "And I have such a good idea to really capture the texture of bubbles in the sculpture. See, I'm thinking I-"

"Hey, do you think you could make me some fruit kabobs?" Sam asked cutting him off.

"I can't," Spencer said. "Someone, who may or may not have been me, accidently set the watermelon on fire and had to cut open a cantaloupe and use the juice from that to put it out…so unless you want a fruit kabob with just tangelos on it, I can't help you. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go take a very important mid-afternoon nap."

"Yo Fredrat, go make me a sandwich," Sam said, putting her feet up on the coffee table.

"Sure," Freddie said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Okay people, we're now at the eight day mark," Carly said, coming downstairs with her pearpad and a large pile of catalogues.

"Eight day mark for what?" Sam asked.

"For-For what?" Carly exclaimed. "Um, try for the most important night of our teenage lives!"

"It's just prom, Carly," Freddie said.

"Just prom?" Carly repeated, starting towards Freddie. "Prom just so happens to be the night that many girls dream of all their childhoods. The night that dirty, badly dressed seniors finally become shiny and sophisticated in their best formal wear. The night that dreams come true, for crying out loud, Fredward Benson!"

"Um…I'm gonna go eat a tangelo," Freddie said nervously, heading into the kitchen.

"Carls, seriously, you need to calm down," Sam said.

"I will calm down once I finally decided on the right shoes to wear with my dress," Carly said, setting down the catalogues and beginning to flip through one. "And I picked out a few dresses in here I thought you might like, Sam. So just decide on one and then we can go pick it up tomorrow."

"Eh, I don't know," Sam said. "I was thinking last night…Maybe I won't go to prom at all."

Carly nearly choked on the juice she was drinking. "What? Not go to prom? Are you _insane_? Why? Why would you do that, Sam?"

"You know I hate big, fancy gatherings with tiny little finger food instead of quality wings and ribs," Sam said.

"Oh come on, you can't tell me you're not just a teensy bit excited to wear a pretty dress that makes you feel like a princess," Carly said. "And it's not like you haven't been asked. I mean, a bunch of guys have asked you! Just today you had Lance Hampton from the baseball team put that cute little note in your locker asking you."

"Wow, guess that guy got hit in the head with too many fly balls," Freddie said. Sam chucked the T.V. remote at him, hitting him hard in the stomach.

"Ow!" Freddie cried, clutching his stomach.

"Look, Carly I know prom is a huge deal to you," Sam said, ignoring Freddie's moans of pain. "But to me it's just some lame dance. I don't want to go."

"But Sam, you're my best friend," Carly said. "What am I supposed to do at prom without my best friend?"

"You're going with that Rick guy," Sam reminded her.

"Well yeah, but I still want have you there too," Carly said. She turned to Freddie. "Will you please talk some sense into her."

"I'm with Sam on this one, actually," Freddie said, still clutching his stomach. "I've never really seen the big deal about prom. Sure, I guess it's nice if you're into all that stuff, but otherwise it _is _just a dance. I was sort of thinking about skipping out on it too."

"I don't believe this," Carly said, crossing her arms as she looked back and forth between her best friends. "You two _really _don't want to go to the biggest event of our senior year? It's going to be a lot of fun! There's going to be a live band, a really good DJ, dancing, obviously, and-"

"I have a pearpod, Carls," Sam said. "I can listen to music in the comfort of my own bed without having to even put on pants."

Carly sighed. "Well…I say you guys are going to regret it later on if you don't go. Think of all the memories you'd be missing!"

"We have plenty other memories from high school," Freddie said.

"I-Fine," Carly conceded. "Don't go to prom. But just know that I'll be having an awesome time without you. I might not even show you pictures."

"Whatever floats your boat, Carls," Sam said, pulling out her pearphone.

"Oh, you know I'm kidding," Carly said after a moment. "I'll show you pictures."

…

"Wow, look at little sister, all purty looking," Spencer said as Carly walked downstairs wearing a light pink prom dress with her hair up in a fancy bun. "Smile!"

"Spencer, you took about fifty pictures of me upstairs," Carly laughed, but she posed for her brother anyway.

"Looking good, Shay," Sam said, taking a bite of her slice of pizza she was eating. "Real classy."

"Yeah, you look great, Carly," Freddie said. "So where's Rick?"

"He's-" Carly started, but she was cut off by a knock at the door. "Here," she said, hurrying over to the door to let her date in.

"Hi, Carly," Rick said, walking into the apartment. "Wow, you look really nice."

"Thanks, so do you," Carly smiled. "I'll be ready to leave in a sec." She picked up her purse and then turned to Sam and Freddie. "Okay, you guys, I know you both _really _don't want to go to prom, but, well, if you _do _change your mind…Sam, I went and picked out a really cute dress for you yesterday, it's laying on my bed, and Freddie, Spencer has his tux hanging in his closet you can borrow."

"Thanks but no thanks, Carls," Sam said. "I think I'm perfectly good right here with this extra-large pizza."

"Yeah, I appreciate it, but I think I'll just stay in tonight," Freddie said.

"Well, okay," Carly sighed. "Have fun then."

"You too, kid," Sam smiled.

"Alright, well, I'd better be off too," Spencer said as Carly and Rick left. "I promised Socko's cousin April I'd help her organize her calendar store. You two alright here?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded.

"Cool, see you then," Spencer said.

Sam picked up the remote as Spencer closed the door behind him and turned on the T.V. "So," she said, flipping through the channels. "What are _your _plans for tonight?"

"I thought I'd get a head start on some editing for iCarly," Freddie replied. "What about you?"  
"I'm doing this for the rest of the night," Sam said.

"Ah," Freddie nodded.

Suddenly, Sam frowned and clicked off the T.V. "Okay, Benson. Spit it out; why didn't you go to prom?"

"What do you mean?" Freddie said. "I told you, for the same reason you didn't, it's just some school dance."

"Please, you're a nub, you live for this kind of lame chiz," Sam said. "Why didn't you just find a chick and drag her there?"

"You know all the girls pretty much had dates within the first week of prom being announced," Freddie said. "Well, except for Magic Malika, but I wasn't going down _that _road again."

"Carly didn't," Sam said. "I would've thought you'd jump on this chance to go with Carly to a huge dance."

"Huh?" Freddie frowned. "Why would I want to go with Carly? I mean, sure, if no one had asked her a few days before the dance and she was really upset about it, I probably would've, but going to prom with her…I don't know, it would just be weird."

"Oh," Sam said.

"So why didn't _you _go?" Freddie asked. "I mean, it's not like you didn't get asked. I heard Shawn Carter in my physics class saying that he asked you, but you told him no."

"I _told_ you, I don't do big fancy dances," Sam said.

"Oh," Freddie said. And then he sighed.

"What?" Sam asked.

"I-Okay, not being that into prom wasn't the reason I didn't go," Freddie admitted. "Or not having a date…I didn't tell you or Carly, but Emily Weston asked me, but I turned her down. The reason I didn't want to go was because…I can't really…dance."

Sam frowned. "What?"

"I mean, sure, when we do Random Dancing on iCarly, I can just jump around and stuff," Freddie said. "But at the prom there's gonna be slow dancing, and I just know I'd make a total fool out of myself. I'd probably step on the poor girl's feet or trip over my own legs.

Sam laughed. "Are you serious? _That's _the reason you didn't go? That's the reason _I _didn't want to go!"

"Wait, what?" Freddie said. "_You _can dance. You did that pageant a couple years ago, plus you could've gone to that fancy dance school in New York if you didn't decide to move to L.A. after graduation."

"Well yeah, I can dance by myself, or with someone for a fast song or something," Sam said. "But I can't slow dance. The one time I tried it when I was twelve at my Aunt Maggie's third wedding I just couldn't get the hang of it."

Freddie chuckled. "Wow…so looks like we're both sitting here on prom night for the same reason."

"Yup," Sam sighed. "Don't tell Carly or I'll break your elbows, but…I sort of wish I'd gone. I just didn't want to be the pathetic girl who can't dance with her date."

Freddie and Sam were silent for a minute, and then Freddie took a deep breath. "Hey, you know what? Why don't we go to prom?"

"Now?" Sam frowned.

"Sure," Freddie nodded. "Carly said she left you a dress and I can wear Spencer's tux…I mean, since we both have the same problem, we could just, you know…go together?"

Sam grinned. "You asking me to prom, Benson?"

"I am," Freddie smiled.

Sam thought about this for a moment. "Okay. I'll go change into my dress and be back down in twenty minutes."

"Sounds like a plan," Freddie nodded.

…

"So I think I just step back when you step forward," Freddie said as him and Sam tried to make some sort of an attempt to dance along with the other couples at the prom later that evening.

"Good, maybe this time you won't trample my feet," Sam said.

"Hey, I've got bruised toes from you too!" Freddie snapped. "Okay, you ready to try this?"

"Fine, let's do it, Fredbug," Sam said. She put her hands on his shoulders and he put his on her waist as they began to step along to the music.

"Hey, we're doing it!" Freddie said.

"Oh my God, you guys came!" Carly said, running over to the two. "I knew you'd change your minds; no one can resist prom! Wait…were you two dancing with each other?"

"Um, well, we-" Sam started.

"Say no more," Carly grinned. "I'll just go back and find Rick while you two dance the night away…together!"

"Well," Freddie said as Carly walked away (not before snapping a few pictures with her pearphone, of course). "I have to admit…this prom's pretty impressive."

"Yeah, they have decent food," Sam nodded.

Freddie laughed. "You know what, Sam? I'm actually having fun here tonight, thanks for coming with me."

"No prob, nub," Sam said. "I guess this _does _beat watching reruns of _Cops_ all night."

"I guess so," Freddie nodded. "And…you look pretty good in that dress, Sam."  
Sam smirked, her cheeks blushing ever so slightly. "And you clean up good too, for a total dork," she replied.


	233. Chapter 233

**AN-So this is a sequel to chapter 194, where Sam and Freddie talked during Carly and Sam's fight in iQuit iCarly. **

…

_Equipping_

Freddie walked up Sam's driveway, trying to avoid the old buckets of fried chicken that littered the entire surrounding area of the house. He reached the door and knocked. He heard a hissing noise, and he looked down at his feet to see Sam's cat, Frothy, staring at him menacingly.

"Er, hey there, Frothy," Freddie said. He never did like this cat…"Um, good kitty. Very good-Ah!"

The cat had pounced and sunk its claws into Freddie's leg.

"Frothy, let go," Sam said, opening the door.

At her command, the cat released Freddie's leg from its grasp and hurried into the house.

"That cat hates me," Freddie mumbled, rubbing his now sore leg.

"Yeah, probably," Sam shrugged. "Anyway, get in already, it's cold!"

"So do you and Fleck have the video ready to be edited?" Freddie asked, coming inside.

"Most of it," Sam replied. "We still have shoot one more scene tomorrow night outside your apartment building on the window washing thingy."

"Alright, cool," Freddie said, setting his laptop down on Sam's very clustered coffee table. "Um, is that a hand under the couch cushion?"

"Relax, it's plastic," Sam said, grabbing the fake hand and tossing it away. "So, Benson, do your editing magic on this baby." She handed him her own laptop.

"What's your video about?" Freddie asked as he inserted his USB into Sam's laptop so he could do the editing on his computer.

"These tourists who have their tour guide replaced with a zombie," Sam replied. "And since I don't have to run my ideas by Carly anymore, I got Gibby to dress up in a zombie costume with real swamp gunk on it."

"How…lovely," Freddie said.

"You know what," Sam said, angrily slamming her bottle of root beer down on the coffee table, nearly knocking over what looked like a jar of old steak sauce. "At first, I was actually a little upset about this fight, but now that I think about it, I am _so _much better off without Carly as my best friend."

"Sam," Freddie sighed. "You don't mean-"

"I don't have to listen to anyone constantly shutting down my ideas because they're 'harmful'," Sam said. "I don't have to spend _hours _in Glitter Gloss helping her decided between two dang shirts that look exactly the same! I don't-"

"Sam, don't do this," Freddie said.

"What? Bash on Carly?" Sam said. "Why shouldn't I when she's been doing the same exact thing, according to you."

"Both of you need to stop it," Freddie said. "You can't tell me, honestly, that you're more happy now not being friends with Carly than you were during your friendship."

"Yeah, well, I'll get used to it," Sam mumbled, leaning back in her seat. "Sure, Carly and I were 'best friends', and I practically spent all my time with her, but hey, I can get on with my life without her just fine. It will be just like when Melanie left for boarding school?"

"Melanie?" Freddie frowned. "Wait, I'm still confused on this whole subject. Does she, or does she not, exist? Because you told me she didn't, but Carly always says that she does and the whole thing just confuses me."

Sam got up and headed over to her fireplace, the mantle of which was just as crowded as her coffee table. She grabbed a picture frame from behind a half-eaten bag of pork rinds and tossed it to him.

Freddie looked at the picture and saw two young, identical blonde girls.

"Whoa, wait, so she's _real_?" Freddie asked, staring at the picture.

"Yes, Frednub, Melanie's real," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "And her and I used to be really close when we were little, like me and Carly are-were. But then when we were seven she got admitted to a fancy boarding school in Texas and she left and then it was just me."

Freddie set the picture down. "But Sam, if you'd just talk to-"

"I'm not talking to Carly!" Sam said loudly. "Maybe…Maybe if she came to me…but that's not going to happen. It doesn't take a genius to figure out that Carly doesn't need me in her life. She can make friends in a heartbeat. Watch, by this time next week she'll have a new best friend who can host iCarly with her."

"Sam, you're not going to be replaced on iCarly," Freddie said.

"Yeah, right," Sam spat.

"It's true," Freddie said. "Firstly, _I'd _have to agree to it, which I _wouldn't, _and secondly, as mad as Carly may be right now, she's not going to do that. And She's not going to replace you as her best friend either. Believe it or not, you happen to have plenty of characteristics that make you a pretty great best friend to have around."

"Like what?" Sam asked.

"Well, you're loyal," Freddie said. "And you're honest, plus you're fun. I don't think there are two many people out there who can say they have all that."

Sam showed a small smile. And then after a minute, she said, "I'm still not talking to Carly first."

"You two," Freddie said, shaking his head. "Are the most _stubborn _girls in Seattle."

"Just edit the video, Fredgut," Sam said.

"Alright, alright," Freddie said. "And just so I don't toss and turn all night worrying about this…How are you getting the window washing machine to do your last scene?"

"I talked to the building manager already," Sam said. "He's equipping us. Don't worry, nothing illegal about this video."

"Just checking," Freddie chuckled.


	234. Chapter 234

_Amateur _

"Clarissa, did you go make sure the minister got here?" Ashton asked.

"Yup, he's here," Clarissa nodded. "And you double checked that the caterers are at the reception?"

"Uh-huh," Ashton nodded. "Okay, I think that's everything, we just need to-Holy chiz, I forgot to pick up the cake from the bakery!"

"You what?" Clarissa exclaimed. "That could ruin the whole wedding!"

"Relax, girls," Carly said. "I picked up the cake. I'm no amateur when it comes to weddings, you know."

"Hey, Carls," Sam said, sticking her head outside the door into the hallway where the three were standing. "Have you seen Freddie anywhere?"

"I think he's talking with Gibby," Carly replied. "But don't worry, I told him to be here in ten minutes."

"Wait, is she all dressed?" Ashton asked. "I want to see her!"

"Me too!" Clarissa and Carly exclaimed as they hurried into the room where Sam was.

"Whoa, Emma!" Ashton said, stopping in her tracks at the sight of her twin sister standing in her white wedding dress. "You look amazing!"

"I better, it took me an hour to get this thing on," Emma said. She turned back to the mirror. "You really think I look ready for this? I don't look like, oh I don't know, someone who's going to screw this up?"

"Emma, you look perfect," Sam told her. "You're just nervous."

"Yeah, your mom was the same way," Carly told her. "And look how long _her _marriage has lasted."

"Yeah, and trust me, nothing's going to go wrong with the wedding," Clarissa said. "Ashton and I have planned this thing to the tee. Well, other than Ashton forgetting the cake."

"You forgot my wedding cake?" Emma said, glaring at her sister. "That's the most important thing about the wedding!"  
"Calm down, the cake's here," Carly said. "I know that's a high priority. This isn't my first Benson wedding. Anyway, Emma, you excited to become Mrs. Emma Gibson soon?"

"She's only been doodling that name since they first started going out," Ashton grinned.

"You are _so _lucky I need you as my Maid of Honor right now," Emma snapped.

"And just think, Sam," Carly said. "You're going to be in-laws with Gibby! Man, I bet you never saw _that _coming! I mean, if someone told you thirty years ago that you and Freddie would be married and have kids, I'm sure it would've been a shock, but could you imagine your reaction if they told you your daughter would be marrying Gibby's son?"

"Clarissa, have you ever heard of a Neville Paperman?" Sam asked. "If he has a son, I will pay a hundred bucks to go on a date with him and-"

"Fine, fine, I'm shutting up," Carly said.

"Hey, you finally dressed?" Sam and Freddie's two sons, Jason and Tyler asked, coming into the room.

"Yeah, after an hour," Emma said.

"Well, you look good, sis," Jason said, giving his younger sister a kiss on the cheek.

"Yeah, and I just have to say thank you so much for marrying Quincy," Tyler said.

"Why?" Emma frowned.

"Because this wedding's crawling with his mom's hot model friends and their equally hot, but younger, daughters!" Tyler said.

"Unbelievable," Sam said, rolling her eyes. She turned back to Emma, who was nervously fidgeting with her veil.

"You okay, Em?"

"Yeah," he daughter answered slowly. "It's probably just nerves, like you said."

"Hey, you know what?" Sam said, lowering her voice so only Emma could hear her. "I promise you, the second you get to that alter with Quincy, you're going to forget all about feeling nervous."

"Is that what happened when you married dad?" Emma asked, smiling.

"Yup," Sam nodded. "That's exactly what happened."

…..

"You know, why do tuxes only have to be for weddings?" Gibby asked Freddie as the two walked down a hallway in the church. "Why is a guy judged if he wants to, oh, I don't know, go get some juice wearing a tux?"

"Huh?" Freddie said. "Oh, yeah, you look great in your tux, Gib."

"You weren't listening to me, were you?" Gibby said indignantly, crossing his arms.

"Sorry," Freddie said. "It's just a big day, you know."

"Why?" Gibby asked.

"Um, because your son is marrying my daughter," Freddie frowned. "Remember?"

"Oh, yeah," Gibby nodded. "Isn't that awesome? We're gonna be related!"

"Yeah, it's great," Freddie sighed. "But it's just a little…sentimental. I mean, I'm gonna have to walk my little girl down the aisle and give her to another man. Don't get me wrong, Quincy's a great guy, and I know he makes Emma happy, but a part of me just wants her to go back to being that five-year old who would come running into my arms whenever there was a thunderstorm. I guess maybe I'm just-Dude! You're not even listening to me!"

"See how it feels?" Gibby said, looking up from the vase of flowers he had been playing with.

"Hey, where's Quincy?" Freddie asked.

"In that room down there," Gibby said. "Hey, do you think I can go get some low-carb applesauce before the ceremony starts?"

"Um, sure, go for it," Freddie said.

"Sweet!" Gibby grinned, hurrying off.

Freddie shook his head, and then walked towards the room Gibby had said Quincy was in and knocked.

"Come in," his future son-in-law said.

"Hey," Freddie said, walking into the room, spotting Quincy nervously fidgeting with his bow tie.

"Hi," Quincy said, his hands visibly shaking.

"You nervous?" Freddie asked knowingly.

"Maybe a little," Quincy admitted. "Have-Have you seen Emma yet?"

"Not since this morning," Freddie said. "She's been getting dressed with Sam over on the other side of the church. I'm heading over there in a few minutes."

"Oh," Quincy said.

"I just wanted to talk to you for a minute before everything got started," Freddie said.

"About what?" Quincy asked.

"Well, first and foremost, I just need to let you know that if you _ever_ hurt my daughter in _any_ way, you _will _be paying for it," Freddie said. "Now I've known you all your life and you're my best friend's son, but that doesn't mean you get a free pass."

Quincy's eyes widened. "But I'd never-"

"I know, I know," Freddie said quickly. "I couldn't think of a better man to be marrying Emma than you. I just needed to give you that speech. It's a fatherly duty. Maybe you'll understand one day. Anyway, I also just wanted to tell you that I know how…difficult Emma can be at times. Believe me, she inherited her mom's attitude and then some. And because of that, Emma…well, she's not real good at the whole 'feelings' thing. But just know that even though she'll probably only say it on rare occasions, she really does love you. You make her happier than I could've ever imagined her."

Quincy smiled. "I feel the same way about her."

"I know you do," Freddie said, patting him on the back. "Well, I'm gonna go check on Emma now. Your dad should be coming in any minute, he just went to go get some applesauce or something."

"Of course," Quincy sighed.

Freddie walked out of the room, closing the door behind him. He walked around the corner and down another long hallway to the room where he knew Emma was.

"Hey," he said, poking his head in. "Everyone dressed?"

"Yes, nub," Sam said, giving her husband a quick peck on the lips as he entered.

"Wow, Emma," Freddie said, staring at his daughter. "You look beautiful sweetheart."

"Thanks, dad," Emma smiled.

"Hey, you guys, we're ready to get started," Carly said, hurrying into the room. "Emma, you and Freddie need to wait outside the main entrance, Sam, you need to get to the front of the church."

"Okay," Emma said.

"We'll be there in a second," Sam said.

Carly nodded and left, leaving the three alone.

"Alright, remember Emma, just don't worry about the nerves," Sam told her, giving her daughter a kiss on the cheek. "And if you start to get bored during the minister's insanely long speech about marriage, just think about the reception and the three types of ham that are waiting for you."

"Got it," Emma grinned.

"I'll meet you outside the entrance in a minute, Emma," Freddie told her.

"Okay, hurry though," Emma said. "I don't care if we have to stop the wedding to wait for you, but Ashton _might _murder you."

"I wouldn't miss the big moment for anything," Freddie promised.

"Wow," Sam said as Emma left. "Can you believe this is actually happening?"

"I know," Freddie sighed. "In just a few minutes, I'll be walking her down the aisle…"

"Hey, don't get all depressed, Fredward," Sam said. "It's a wedding, don't bring everyone down."

"I'm not depressed, I'm happy for her," Freddie said. "It's just…she really grew up fast, didn't she?"

"Yeah," Sam said as Freddie put an arm around her. "She really did."


	235. Chapter 235

_Decay_

"Why do we all have to come?" Sam moaned as Spencer pulled into a parking spot in front of Food Fox, the local grocery store.

"Because," Carly said from the front seat. "I need to get food for our little movie night tonight, and I'm sick and tired of either having one of you text me to get something just as I'm about to leave the store and having you think up something else you want after I get home and making me go out to the store _again_! This way, you can all pick out what you want in one trip."

"This isn't my usual grocery store, though," Gibby frowned. "I like my food from Mr. Hooper's store down the street because Mr. Hooper always lets me have free samples of his special eggplant."

"Oh yeah, that's the guy who sells me the melons for my smoothies real cheap!" T-Bo said.

"And there special pork chops are to _die _for," Sam added.

"Yeah, my mom really likes Mr. Hooper's too," Freddie said. "Even though Mr. Hooper probably hates her…"

"You know, Mr. Hooper's store really _is _great," Spencer said. "The nice lady at the bakery always tells me I look like a sweet young lad. Hey, why didn't we go there instead of here?"

"Because, Food Fox is just as good as Mr. Hooper's," Carly said. "And we're here already, so we're not going to drive all the way to another store just because you all have some sort of weird obsession with it!"

"She just doesn't want to go because she spilled hot mustard on Mr. Hooper's son while she was trying to flirt with him," Sam grinned.

"Sam!" Carly hissed.

"I don't really like hot mustard," Gibby said.

"Look, let's just go into the store already," Carly said, opening her car door. "So we can get in, get out, and then get back home where we can spend an hour arguing over which movie to watch."

"Fine," Sam said. "Hey, any chance of you pushing me in one of those carts, Freddud?"

"There is _no _chance," Freddie said.

"Ugh, but I'm _dating _you!" Sam moaned.

"But Sam, I pushed you all around the store last week when we came here for our date," Freddie pointed out.  
"Wait," Spencer frowned. "You two come here on dates?"

"To a grocery store?" T-Bo said.

"Yup," Freddie sighed. "They were giving away a bunch of lunch meat samples, so Sam wanted to come here instead of spending the night watching the new robot movie I got; _Cyborgs and their Cyborg-Dogs._"

"So, you two got dressed up and came here?" Spencer said, still clearly astounded by this.

"Stop trying to work out the logic behind what they do," Carly said. "Believe me, you'll only wind up giving yourself a migraine."

"You know, my mom used to push me in one of those shopping carts," Gibby said. "Man, those were the days…"

"Aw, remaining your childhood?" Carly smiled.

"No, last week," Gibby said.

"Right…" Carly frowned. "Well, let's just get shopping. So far, I have 2 liters of Whaoo Punch, chips, dip, pretzels, frozen pizzas, meat and vegetarian, chocolate chip ice cream and a box of Fat Cakes on my shopping list. Now, you have until we pick up the last item to add anything else because we're not coming back again."

"Wow, _someone's _bossy," T-Bo said as the group walked into the store.

"Alright, one bag of chips," Carly said, stopping at a display of tortilla chips and tossing a bag into the cart. "Now we just need some dip-"

"Hold on, _reduced fat_ chips?" Sam frowned, picking up the bag. "Carly!"

"Baby, just let it go," Freddie said. "They don't taste any different than the regular ones, plus they're healthy for you."

"If I wanted to be healthy, I'd eat a bag of spinach," Sam said.

"Sam, we go through this with everything," Carly sighed. "Are we really going to have another incident like we did with bubble gum the other day?"

"They make low-fat bubble gum?" Gibby asked. "Yes! Finally! The gum company must've finally gotten my emails."

"You know they also make low-fat toothpaste too," Spencer said. "Because apparently, each time you brush your teeth, you consume about three calories."

"Shut up!" T-Bo said. "So all this time I've been brushing, I've really just been getting chunky?"

"You guys come on, we still have a lot of shopping to do," Freddie said.

"Thank you, Freddie," Carly said. "At least _someone _isn't obsessed with fat content."

"Good," Freddie said. "So let's just get the regular, fatty, chips and be on our way."

"Wait, what?" Carly frowned as Freddie replaced the bags in the cart. "I thought you were on my side about this!"

"I was," Freddie said. "But, come on, if you had a hot girlfriend, would you say no to her?"

"Thank you, baby," Sam said, kissing him on the cheek.

"Oh, you're crafty, Puckett," Carly said, narrowing her eyes at her best friend.

"Well, if we're going to be unhealthy savages tonight, I'm getting myself some fruit," Carly said, steering the cart towards the produce section.

"That's perfect, I can stock up on some smoothie materials," T-Bo said.

"Smoothies don't have fruit in them," Gibby said, chuckling at the man's cluelessness.

"Um, Gibby? What do you think Berry Blitz's and Melon Might's have in them?" Sam asked.

"I don't know, fructose?" Gibby shrugged.  
"What's fructose?" Spencer asked.

"It's a fancy word for sugar," Freddie said.

"No, wait, I thought that was glucose," Spencer said.

"That too," Freddie explained. "See, there are-"

"Okay, okay, I've got my strawberries!" Carly said, quickly putting a carton of strawberries into the cart. "We can go and find something else now."

"Hold up, you picked wonked up strawberries," T-Bo said, examining the fruit. "See, you need to get some like these, because they'll decay at a much slower rate, so you can enjoy them longer."

"Wow, you really know your fruit," Spencer said, impressed.

"What? I'm not all about putting strange foods on sticks that really shouldn't be on sticks," T-Bo said.

"Well, at least they don't make strawberries with different fat contents," Carly said. "So, can we just go finish shopping?"

"Oh, right," Freddie said. "Hey, can we grab some peanut butter while we're here?"

"Oh yeah, and jelly?" Sam said.

"What? Are you two going to make some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches?" Carly asked.

"No," Sam frowned. "See, we do this thing where-"

"I don't think I really want to know what you two are going to do," Carly said. "All _I _want to do is finish shopping. So for the millionth time, can we please finish up?"

"You did _not _ask us a million times," Gibby said.

"Gibby!"

"Oh, hey, can we go to the lobster tank?" Spencer asked.

"Why?" Carly asked. "Why do you want to go see lobsters? You're terrified of shellfish!"

"Used to be!" Spencer said. "My new doctor's helping me conquer my fear of them. Which is why I brought special lobster food with me so I could go feed them and try not to imagine them leaping from their tanks onto my beautiful face."

"Oh man, did _I _have a dream about lobsters last night," T-Bo said. "I dreamt they were in some courtroom, dancing around everywhere!"

"Hey, wait," Sam said, turning to Spencer. "How do you have money to pay for a fancy lobster doctor, but you can't afford the good ice cream anymore?"

"Um, I-" Spencer started.

"Yeah," Freddie said, crossing his arms. "I depended on that stuff, you know. I only have my mom's sugarless, soy, vitamin enriched ice cream to eat now!"

"Yeah man, I have to eat that pathetic excuse for a dairy desert too now," T-Bo said.

"He's hiding the ice cream for himself, aren't you?" Sam said.

Gibby gasped. "That's atrocious!"

"I needed it!" Spencer defended. "I had a rough week! First Kilanya got kicked off _America Sings_, then my massage got canceled, and the girl who I accidently ran over blocked me from Splashface!"

"So you made us eat jank ice cream because your life's a big mess?" T-Bo exclaimed.

"Look, it's no big deal," Spencer said. "I'll buy you guys some more right now! Carly, remind me to get the ice cream when we get to the freezer isles, okay? Carly?"

The five turned around to a display of apples where Carly was browsing.

"Carly! What are you doing?" Spencer asked.

"I'm sorry, I don't think I know you people," Carly said, smiling at them. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have some items to purchase. Have a nice day, though."

"I-She ditched us!" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah, what's up with that?" Gibby said.

"I don't know, I thought we were being delightful shopping companions!" T-Bo said.

"So did I," Spencer nodded.

"Great," Sam sighed.

"Relax, I'm sure Carly's not _actually _mad at us," Freddie said, putting his arm around his girlfriend. "She probably just needed to have some 'quiet-time'."

"No, it's not that," Sam said. "She's going to pick out the low-fat versions of _everything._"

…**..**

**AN-Shout outs to anyone who knows what show the Dancing Lobsters bit comes from!**


	236. Chapter 236

**AN-Hey! So the dancing lobsters from last chapter were from the Amanda Show! One of my favorite shows from my childhood! Congratz to everyone who got it:**

**Randomer**

**addictedtochocolates**

**Grim**

**Cbb**

**Stephanie ariza**

**Guest**

**Darksun187**

**iCarlyyyy**

**iGoodbye**

**sushi.23**

**Kezziexx**

**DannySamLover20**

**icarlyvictoriousfan**

**Guest**

…**..**

_Worthy_

"So let me get this straight," Tyler frowned. "I'm finally in college, off on my own, supporting myself, and I _still _can't have a car?"

"Oh there are just _so _many things wrong with that sentence," Sam said, flipping the burgers she was grilling out on the patio. "First of all, you _did _have a car, remember? But you totaled it driving past that cheerleader carwash because you weren't paying attention to the road."  
"But that was the cheerleader's fault!" Tyler exclaimed. "How the heck am I supposed to _not _look when they're waving at me?"

"And second," Sam said, ignoring him. "You aren't supporting yourself! You live here over the summers _and_ we pay for everything for you at college!"

"But I saved you a ton of money by getting a football scholarship!" Tyler argued. "Can't you repay me by buying me a car?"

"Eh, ask your football coaches to buy you a car," Sam said.

"But I'm your baby, your sweet, youngest child!" Tyler argued. "Please, mommy?"

"You know, if you were still cute, you'd actually have a valid argument," Sam said, adding cheese to the burgers.

"What? I'm still adorable? When'd I stop being adorable?" Tyler asked.

"The second you got taller than me," Sam replied.

"Burgers almost done?" Freddie asked, walking outside with an armload or plates, followed by Sam and Freddie's oldest son, Jason.

"Hey, dad?" Tyler said as Freddie and Jason began to set the table next to the grill. "There's a train exhibit in town next week for the Fourth of July. You want to go with me?"

"Sure, that sounds fun," Freddie said.

"Great," Tyler said. "Just buy me a car and I'll drive us there."

Freddie looked over at Sam. "Is he for real?"

"I don't even know," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "The girls here yet?"

"Ashton just got here," Freddie said. "And Emma called and said she'll be here in a few minutes and that she invited Quincy."

"That's cool, we have plenty of food," Sam said, sliding the burgers onto a plate. "Assuming you all only have one, since Emma and I already have dibs on three each."

"Hey," Ashton said, walking out onto the patio.

"Hey, Ash," Sam smiled.

"Guess what?" Ashton said. "I just got a raise at work!"

"What? No way, that's awesome, sweetie!" Freddie said.

"Yeah, isn't that awesome?" Ashton grinned. "I just graduated college two months ago and I'm already junior vice president of a company? Do I rock or what?"

"So you have a little extra money now?" Tyler asked. "How about you and I drive down to a car lot and you pick me out a nice new ride?"

"Um, how about no?" Ashton said.

"Dude, lay off the car stuff already," Jason said.

"I will if you'll buy me a car," Tyler said. "Come on, bro. What do you say?"

"Hey, guys," Emma said, walking out to meet her family, followed by her boyfriend, Quincy Gibson. "Oh thank God, the burgers are done. I'm starving!"

"Then come on, let's eat," Sam said, setting the burgers down on the table.

"You remembered to cook me a vegie burger, right mom?" Ashton asked.

"Yeah, it's that little, flavorless thing there," Sam said.

"Sam, you promised you'd try to stop making fun of vegetarian food," Freddie said.

"But it's so hard!" Sam said.

"Hey, Quincy, Emma," Ashton said, biting into her vegie burger. "You guys want to go meet up with Clarissa tonight? Her and I were actually thinking about renting an apartment together in the city, since she just got a new job here."

"Oh yeah, Carly told me about that," Sam said. "She's some sort of event manager, right?"

"Yup," Ashton nodded.

"Yeah, we'll go," Quincy nodded.

Emma took a swig of her soda. "Okay, people, I've got news."

"How much is it going to cost me?" Freddie sighed.

"Not that type of news, dad," Emma said, rolling her eyes. "Although if you're willing to spare some cash, I could use twenty bucks."

"Isn't it nice to have _one _kid who doesn't beg you guys for money?" Jason asked.

"Hey, I don't ask them for money!" Ashton defended.

"Yes you do," Jason said. "Remember a certain speeding ticket a few months ago?"

"That was _not _my fault!" Ashton said. "I was going only five miles over the speed limit! I mean really, that was the _one _cop in Seattle who was totally immune to my flirting!"

"What's your news, Emma?" Sam asked, rolling her eyes.

"It's actually more like 'our' news," Quincy said.

"Fine," Emma said. "_'Our'_ news. You happy?"

"Yes," Quincy smiled.

"Anyway," Emma said. "Quincy and I are sort of, you know, gonna get married."

Freddie spit out his drink.

"Oh my God! No way!" Ashton shrieked jumping up and throwing her arms around her sister and Quincy. "That's amazing! When'd it happen? How'd you propose, Quincy? Was it romantic? Wait, where's your ring?"

"Right here," Emma said taking her diamond ring out of her pocket and sliding it onto her finger. "I took it off so you wouldn't see it right away."

"Congratulations, Emma," Sam smiled, hugging her daughter. "You two, Quincy."

"Thanks," Quincy replied. "But um, do you think you could not mention this to my parents just yet? We were going to have dinner with them tomorrow and tell them then."

"No prob," Sam said.

"I'm real happy for you guys," Jason said. "But hey, Quincy, you better be good to my baby sister."

"Yeah, Quince, welcome to the family," Tyler said. "Hey, how about you treat your future brother-in-law to a new car?"

"Tyler…" Sam said. She turned to her husband, who was sitting motionless, in his chair, soda dripping from his face.

"Um, dad?" Emma said slowly. "You-You okay?"

"What? Yeah, yeah," Freddie said weakly. "I'm just a little, shocked. Come here, Emma." He pulled his daughter into a hug. "Congratulations, sweetheart. I-I couldn't be happier for you."

"Thanks, daddy," Emma said softly.

"And Quincy," Freddie said.

"Yes?" Quincy replied nervously.

"I couldn't think of a more worthy husband for my little girl," Freddie smiled.

…..

Later that night, once the kids had left, Sam walked into her and Freddie's bedroom, spotting her husband lying on their bed, staring up at the ceiling.

"You okay, baby?" she asked gently, curling up next to him.

"Hmm? Oh, yeah," Freddie nodded. "I was just thinking…"

"Hey, come on, this is supposed to be a happy thing," Sam said. "You know how much Emma loves Quincy. I mean, they've been together since high school."

"I know," Freddie said. "And I _am _happy for them. It's just weird, you know."

"Yeah, I guess it is," Sam smiled. "Our daughter's actually getting married."

Freddie sighed. "Crazy, huh?"

"Hey," Sam said, patting his shoulder comfortingly. "You know she's still going to be your little girl, right?"

Freddie smiled. "Thanks, Sam. I really needed to hear that."


	237. Chapter 237

**AN-So this is a sequel to ch 201, where Sam comes back from a date with a jerky guy after the gang went to the Groovy Smoothie in iBalls, and Freddie begins his whole jerky act to try and win Sam back.**

…**..**

_Risking_

"Maybe we could do a parody of all that new show on the Dingo channel, you know, the one with that boy who moved to the U.S. from Saturn?" Carly said to Sam. "And we can have Gibby be the alien."

"He is perfect for the part," Sam said, eating a container of yogurt.

"Hey, Carly, sorry I'm late," Freddie said, entering the iCarly studio. "I was just finishing up some homework." He glanced over at Sam. "So, contributed nothing as usual yet, Puckett?"

"Hey, I bring a lot more creative ideas to these meetings than you," Sam frowned.

"Um, here's the ideas we came up," Carly said, handing Freddie her pearpad as he sat down in the beanbag chair next to her.

Just then, Sam's phone went off.

"Oh, is that Mr. Smoothie Guy?" Carly grinned as Sam picked up her phone.

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "He wants to meet me at the mall tonight."

"Pfft, a mall trip with _you_?" Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "That poor guy's going to have nothing left in his wallet once you two walk past the food court."

"Freddie-" Carly started, but Sam cut her off.

"For your information, _Benson_," she said. "Ben happens to _enjoy _treating his chick to food."

"Yeah well, all I know is, ever since we broke up, my savings have really increased."

Carly frowned. "Um, Freddie, why are you-?"

"I think I'm going to get some fruit," Freddie said, getting to his feet.

"We don't need an update of your actions," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Your life's not that interesting."

Freddie made a face at her as he headed out of the studio.

"So," Carly said, scooting her seat closer to Sam's. "You want to borrow an outfit for your mall date?"

"Nah, I'm not going," Sam said. "I just texted him back and said that I didn't want to go."

"He was _really _that bad the other night?" Carly asked.

"I told you, that date we went on the other night was totally suckish," Sam said. "Next time he asks me to do something with him, I'm telling him to hit the road."

"But you were just saying how awesome it was that he was willing to buy you all the food you wanted," Carly said.

"Believe it or not, Carls," Sam said. "I _do _want more from a guy than free food."

"I'm sorry, Sam, I didn't mean it like that," Carly said quickly.

"Nah, I know," Sam smiled.

"Sam?" Carly said thoughtfully. "Is there, you know, any possibility that you're trying to make Freddie jealous?"

"What?" Sam exclaimed. "No way!"

"It's just," Carly said. "Every time Ben comes up when we're with Freddie, you make him sound so great, and then the second he's gone, you say you don't really like him."

"No I don't," Sam mumbled.

Carly sighed. She knew pushing Sam right now would just get Sam upset.

"Alright, well, I need a snack," Carly stated, getting to her feet. "You want anything, Sam?"

"Just some iced tea," Sam said.

"'Kay," Carly said brightly. "Be right back!"

Sam watched as her best friend left the room. How was it that Carly could practically read her mind? She wondered.

She _had _been trying to make Freddie jealous, had it been that obvious? After the events that took place while Carly was in Yakima, Sam had thought, for one wild moment, that maybe her and Freddie were getting close, again. Close enough, maybe, for him to consider re-trying some things…For crying out loud, hadn't she been 'normal' enough this weekend? She was _supportive _of his lame 3-D idea, and she _comforted _him after his FredBott fiasco. What more could she do?

But from the way Freddie was acting today, it seemed like he was far from being jealous that she had apparently gotten together with another guy. In fact, from the way he talked about their relationship, she was starting to wonder whether he had even enjoyed that month when they were together.

_Guess you didn't mean it, Benson_, Sam thought miserably to herself, resting her chin on her knees. _You didn't love me_.

…..

Freddie stormed downstairs. He didn't think he could handle hearing anymore of how wonderful stupid Ben was. He angrily grabbed a banana from the fruit bowl on the Shay's counter band began peeling it more forcefully than usual.

_So Ben buys her all the food she wants_, Freddie though hastily to himself. He did that, didn't he? But then again, maybe he _had _been stingy with his boy wallet.

He wondered if he was 'abnormal' enough out there. He had tried acting like he imagined Sam would've if _he _had a girlfriend a few years ago; insulting the relationship, making below-the-belt comments. Maybe if he kept this up, Sam would see that he really _was_ becoming more abnormal and would dump that pathetic Ben and be willing to give him another chance.

"Hey, Freddie," Carly said, coming downstairs.

"Oh, hey," Freddie said, snapping out of his thoughts.

"Um, Freddie?" Carly asked, grabbing a pitcher of iced tea from the fridge. "Upstairs, don't you think you were being a little, you know, mean to Sam?"

"_Me _mean to _her_?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "I mean, sure, Sam's never exactly been an angel to you, but don't you think all those things you said about your relationship with her and her relationship with Ben were a little uncalled for?"

"What? Pfft, no," Freddie said.

Carly sighed. "Look, I don't know _what _is going on between you two, but just be careful, okay? I don't want you two risking your friendship over trying to get something that you both want that could be easily obtained if for once, in both your stubborn lives, you would just _talk things out_."

"Um, what?"

"Never mind," Carly said, shaking her head.

"Hey, I'm gonna run across the hall and grab my laptop so I can show you guys the edits I made to the Idiot Farm Girl bit, okay?" Freddie said.

"Okay," Carly nodded.

Once Freddie was out of the apartment, he leaned against the wall. He was beyond confused at this point.

Was Carly right? Was he actually being _mean _to Sam? He didn't know what he was supposed to do! He was trying to be abnormal, something he thought she'd like, but was he just screwing _that_ up too?

How did Sam do it? She was always rough and aggressive, and had no problem saying whatever she wanted, but somehow, he realized, she never really came across as a jerk. Maybe he just needed more practice at this…Yes, that was it.


	238. Chapter 238

_Terror_

"You know, I'm really into this whole health craze T-Bo's been into since his dermatologist told him better foods helps your skin," Carly said, sipping her smoothie at the Groovy Smoothie. "But a butternut squash smoothie? Not so good."

"Which is why I stuck to my usual," Sam said, sticking a straw into her own drink. "A very berry blitz." She took a sip of her beverage, but a second later, she was hit with a sudden, overwhelming wave of nausea.

"Sam, are you okay?" Carly frowned as Sam quickly bolted up and dashed to the bathrooms.

Sam pushed the doors of the restroom open, shoving two ladies out of the way as she ran into one of the stalls and vomited the contents of her stomach.

"Sam?" Carly said, coming to her best friend's aid, pulling her hair back for her. "What's wrong? Are you sick?"

"I dunno," Sam mumbled, getting to her feet. "I think I may be getting a stomach flu. All week I've been throwing up right when I wake up."

"You should go home and rest then," Carly said. "Do you want me to call Freddie?"

"No, he's been busy at work," Sam said, opening her purse to grab a mint. "And I feel fine now, really. I don't know what kind of stomach thing I have, but I never feel sick for more than a few minutes after."  
"Well, you should still go rest," Carly said. "Want me to come check on you later?"

"No, mother," Sam smiled, rolling her eyes.

"Alright," Carly laughed. She looked at her watch. "Oh! I'm supposed to go meet Spencer and help him deliver his horse stature. I'll see you later. Feel better!"

"Thanks, Carls," Sam said as Carly rushed out of the bathroom. Once her best friend was gone, Sam opened her bag again and pulled out the small, rectangular box she had bought at the drug store right before she met Carly. She stared at the pregnancy test, in deep contemplation.

_It's probably nothing_, Sam told herself. _But I mean, it wouldn't __**hurt **__to use it, would it? I mean, I probably just have some weird bug or something._

She stuffed the pregnancy test back into her purse, splashed some water onto her face and then headed out of the bathroom.

….

"Okay," Sam said, ripping open the box as she walked into the bathroom that was connected to her and Freddie's bedroom. "So…I think I just pee on this…Good thing I just chugged all that grape juice."

Once Sam had finished, she set the pregnancy test down on the counter and looked at the back of the box.

"A pink plus sign means pregnant," Sam read. "And a blue line means not. Seems simple enough. Now I just wait…three minutes."

She set a timer on her pearphone and sat down on the edge of the bathtub.

It was going to come back negative. Sure, her and Freddie were married; obviously they've been doing the necessary 'activities' to _get _pregnant, but still, her and Freddie hadn't really given any thought to kids just yet. They both agreed that they wanted them in the future, maybe in five years, when Freddie would most likely be head of his firm at the Pear Company and Sam would be comfortably situated at her job as a television show writer.

_A baby wouldn't be so bad though,_ Sam found herself thinking. Despite her tough attitude, she _did _have a sweet spot for babies. _Not that I __**am **__pregnant…_

Finally, the timer went off on Sam's pearphone. She jumped up and with a shaky hand, picked up the pregnancy test.

She had been so prepared to see the blue line that she nearly dropped the test when she saw a small, pink plus sign instead.

"Holy chiz," Sam said softly. She was pregnant. She was having a baby. There was a baby actually inside of her right this very moment.

She placed a hand on her flat abdomen and tried to imagine how something could really be growing in her right now.

She racked her brain, trying to think back to any other signs she might've exhibited over the past few weeks to point to pregnancy. Her feet had been pretty swollen lately, but she had chalked that up to having to wear heels to work everyday. She had always been irregular, so she hadn't given any thought to the fact that she had been late for the past two months, and then there was the morning sickness.

And slowly the shock began to be replaced by a feeling of happiness. She was going to be a mom. Her and Freddie were going to raise this child together!

Freddie…She was going to have to tell Freddie. Tonight. But how? She was telling him she was pregnant with their first child; she had to do this right…

…..

"Man, you would not _believe_ how terrible work was today," Freddie said, dragging his feet into his and Sam's house. "I had a five-hour meeting with my boss, who is an absolute terror, _and _I was just told that I need to come into work for the next five Saturdays." He collapsed onto the couch. "I swear, I'm not moving from this spot for the next three hours."

"Come on, I have something to show you," Sam said, grabbing his hand to pull him up.

"Sam," Freddie moaned. "I'm to tired."

"Please, baby, for me?" Sam said.

"Fine," Freddie sighed, getting to his feet. "But Sam, if you bought _another_ penguin online -"

"No, calm your butt," Sam said, leading him upstairs.

"Calm my butt?" Freddie frowned.

"Yes! Now sit," Sam said as she walked into their bedroom, pushing him onto the bed.

"Um, okay," Freddie said.

"Alright," Sam said, sitting down next to him. She pulled out a shoebox from the drawer of her bedside table. "Open this box, and tell me what all the items have in common."

"What?" Freddie said.

"Just do it!" Sam said.

"Alright," Freddie said, giving his wife a strange look. "I still have no idea what's going on here…"

He lifted the lid off the box and pulled out a small, plastic toy pig, a picture of Sam's idol, the World's Fattest Priest, an old shoelace, a copy of _Boogie Bear_, and a pair of glasses.

"Sam, these things have nothing in common," Freddie said.

"What? Yes they do!" Sam said. "Use your brain, nub!"

"Um, these things were all probably in the trunk of your car?" Freddie guessed. "Which you _really _should clean out, Sam."

"Nope," Sam said. "Keep thinking."

"Hmm, are these all things Gibby's tried to sell at that pawn shop in Vegas?" Freddie asked. "Seriously, ever since he sold his head there, he's convinced he can make a fortune off of anything."

"No!" Sam said. "Come on, baby, you graduated number one in our class in high school and you can't figure what these things have in common?"

"No, because it's impossible!" Freddie said.

"Ugh, isn't it obvious?" Sam asked. "They all relate to babies!"

"Huh?" Freddie frowned. "I'm confused? Why are you showing me a box full of stuff that relate to babies?"

"Because…" Sam smiled. "I think it's going to be a pretty big topic in our house for the next nine months."

"Why?" Freddie asked. "Is there a-Wait a minute…Sam? You-You're not-"

"Freddie," Sam said softly, still smiling. "I'm pregnant."

Freddie's eyes widened. "You-I-You're-You're really-"

"I took the test today," Sam nodded. "And I'm definitely pregnant."  
Freddie, who still looked like a deer in headlights, could not even put together a phrase; he simply continued to stare at Sam.

"Look, I-I know we didn't plan to do this for a few more years," Sam said, a bit nervous about Freddie's reaction. "But I guess we just have to go with it. I-I was surprised too, but-but maybe if you-" but she was suddenly cut off by Freddie kissing her passionately.

"So-So you're happy about this?" Sam asked hesitantly once they pulled away.

"Happy?" Freddie said. "Sam, I-I couldn't be more thrilled about it! We're going to be parents. You and I are going to raise our own child together. How could I be anything _but _thrilled?"

"You don't think it's too soon?" Sam asked. "You really think we're ready?"

"We'll _get_ ready," Freddie told her, kissing her again. "I promise. When'd you find out about this?"

"This afternoon," Sam replied.

"I guess that explains why you've been getting sick in the morning," Freddie said, leaning back on the bed, his arm around Sam.

"Yeah, now that I think about it, I should've put two and two together sooner," Sam smiled.

"Hey," Freddie said, picking up the box again. "Just curious? How the _heck _do these things all relate to babies?"

"I still can't believe you didn't get that, Fredifer," Sam said, grinning, as she took the box from him. She held up the toy pig. "Pigs give us _baby _back ribs." She picked up the picture of Father McGarthy. "You get fat while you're pregnant. And _you _get to wait on me hand and-" she picked up the shoelace. "Foot." She grabbed the copy of _Boogie Bear_ "And this is the perfect book to read a baby to sleep with."

"Only you could manage to come up with something like this," Freddie chuckled, kissing the top of her head. "But wait, you forgot about the glasses? What do they have to do with babies?"

Sam blushed. "I was thinking about it earlier today, and I thought it would be really nice if our baby got your eyes."


	239. Chapter 239

**AN-Hey, I'm sorry if I skipped someone's request. I try my best to keep them in order. Just let me know what the request was**

…**..**

_Dispose_

"So how about this?" Freddie grinned, his arm around Sam as the couple sat happily on the Shay's couch. "After we finish up dinner at Petrozini's, you and I go get some fancy gelato, and then we go back to my place and watch that big fight you've been so excited for?"

"Sounds like a date," Sam smiled, leaning over to kiss her boyfriend.

Suddenly, the elevator door dinged and slid open, and Spencer staggered in, carrying a large bag of dirt.

"Dude, you need help?" Sam asked.

"A little!" Spencer gasped. Sam hurried up to help him ease the bag to the ground.

"Why do you have a giant bag of dirt?" Freddie asked.

"Do you remember when I had that lawn?" Spencer said.

Sam and Freddie nodded.

"Well, I was thinking, instead of a lawn, why not make a giant mud pit?" Spencer said excitedly. "It will be so cool! We can play in it, have mud fights in it, make mud pies in it."

"Whoa, that sounds awesome!" Sam said.

"I know, right?" Spencer nodded. "It's one of my best ideas yet!"

"Um, Spencer," Freddie frowned. "No offense or anything, but you can't be serious."

Sam and Spencer glared at him.

"Why not?" Spencer asked.

"Yeah, what's wrong with him building a mud pit?" Sam demanded.

"Um, for one thing, the mess will be insane," Freddie said. "You think Carly goes berserk when you leave your used dishes on the coffee table, wait 'till she hears about this. Plus it's bound to attract bugs, and not to mention the fact that it's just plain weird!"

"Hey, don't go bashing on a pool of mud!" Sam snapped.

"I'm just saying it would be impractical-"

"Your face is impractical!"  
"That doesn't even make sense, Sam!"

"Guys," Spencer said. "Um, not to break up the couple fight, but can you either help me clear out the living room for this mud pit or go upstairs? I want to get this done before the chick I met while I was gathering all this dirt comes over tonight."

"You mean I can help you with the mud pit?" Sam asked, her face lighting up.

"Um, Sam?" Freddie said. "We have reservations in half-an-hour, remember."

"Oh, yeah," Sam said.

"Hey, just come back over tomorrow," Spencer told her. "We can have a mud ball fight!"

"Alright," Sam laughed.

"So you think eating popsicles in this baby will be a good date for me and the dirt girl tonight?" Spencer asked as he began to push the couch off to the side.

"Um, yeah!" Sam nodded. "That sounds like an awesome date! What girl wouldn't love that, I know I would."

"Sam, we need to get going now if we're going to get those reservations," Freddie said, looking at his watch.

"'kay," Sam said. She turned back to Spencer. "Bye, Spence. Save plenty of mud for tomorrow!"

"Got it!" Spencer called after her.

…

"-And remember to use the new soap I put in the bathroom," Mrs. Benson told Freddie as she readjusted his shirt collar while he tried to eat his cereal the next morning. "And _please_ do not watch the television until I figure out a way to get that disgusting nature channel off."

"Fine," Freddie said, trying not to roll his eyes. "I was probably going to spend the day with Sam, anyway."

"Oh…_Samantha_," Mrs. Benson grimaced.

"Yes mom," Freddie sighed. "My girlfriend."

"Well, if you must, just make sure you disinfect yourself when you get back," she told him. "Who knows how many germs are covering her. Oh, and just so you know, that nurse I work with, Mindy; her daughter just got lazar hair removal, so now she doesn't have quite so much of a mustache. If you wanted to give her a call, I could find you her number and-"

"Bye mom!" Freddie said.

Once his mother had left, Freddie placed his bowl in the dishwasher and pulled out his pearphone. It was still fairly early, not even nine thirty yet, so he knew very well that Sam was still fast asleep, but he figured he could leave her a voicemail telling her to come over when she finally did wake up. He dialed her number, expecting to get Sam's inbox, but was surprised when she actually answered.

"Hey, Frednub. What's up?" Sam asked, picking up.

"You're up?" Freddie frowned. "Wow, this is a first."

"I'm actually across the hall," Sam told him. "I got up early so I could have more time in this mud pit thing with Spencer. We're filling up buckets with mud!"

"Er, any particular reason why?"

"Nope."

"Ah…" Freddie said. "Well, um, I was just calling to ask if you wanted to hang out today."

"You can come over here and play in the mud," Sam suggested.

"I'll come over, but I really don't think I'm getting into the mud," Freddie smiled.

"Fine, be a party pooper," Sam said. "Later."

Freddie hung up his phone. He was still shocked that Sam, the girl who claimed that two in the afternoon was practically the crack of dawn, had gotten up early to go play in the mud with Spencer. He frowned. She never got up that early for him…He shook his head, erasing that thought, and headed over to the Shay's apartment.

"Yo, Freddie!" Spencer said, looking up as Freddie entered the apartment. "How 'impractical' is this mud pit now? Look at my mud pies!"

"Very…nice," Freddie said.

"Yeah, we made mud angels, buried ourselves in mud, made mud castles," Sam smiled, laughing as she dumped out a large bucket of mud.

Freddie stared at his girlfriend. He loved that smile of hers, but he thought that she only smiled like that with _him_; that it was _their _special thing.

Just then, Spencer's phone began to ring.

"Oh man, that's Carly," Spencer said, wiping off his hand as he picked up his pearphone at the edge of the mud pit. "I forgot. I sent her out with my car to get donuts, but there was almost no gas in there…she probably got stuck somewhere. I'd better go catch a bus and go get her."

"You're going to get on a bus covered with mud?" Freddie asked as Spencer stepped out of the mud pit.

"Hey, I see plenty of people do that," Sam shrugged. "Later, Spence."

"See ya', kid," Spencer said quickly, leaving the apartment.

"You sure you don't want to come into the mud, Fredward?" Sam asked.

"Quite," Freddie smiled.

"Well, then I'm not gonna sit in here alone," Sam said, getting out. "Hmm, I should probably shower."

"Might be a good idea," Freddie laughed.

Sam disappeared upstairs and Freddie sat down on the couch. Just then Gibby walked in.

"Gibby!" he said, closing the door behind him.

"I still don't understand why you announce yourself all the time," Freddie said.

"Well who else is going to do it?" Gibby pointed out. "Whoa! Is that a mud pit?"

"Yeah, Spencer made it, and Sam and him have been playing in it all morning," Freddie said. "Weird, right?"

"The mud pit or Sam and Spencer playing in it together?" Gibby asked.

"Um, just the mud pit in general," Freddie said. "Why is it weird that Spencer and Sam were playing in it? I mean, come on, you've known them both for years. What else would you expect them to do in it?"

"I meant weird for _you_," Gibby said.

"Weird for me?" Freddie repeated.

"You know," Gibby shrugged. "Because of Sam's little crush on Spencer?"

"What?" Freddie laughed. "Gibby, you're ridiculous."

"I thought she let that slip or something awhile ago," Gibby said.

"Yeah, sure, like two years ago," Freddie nodded. "But she doesn't have a crush on him anymore. I mean, he's just her best friend's brother now."

"I think that's a song…" Gibby said thoughtfully.

"Look, Sam and _I_, are dating now," Freddie said. "She doesn't have feelings for Spencer…Although-never mind."

"What?" Gibby asked. "Come on, you can tell old Gibby anything."

"Well, I mean, Sam _does _seem to have a soft spot for Spencer," Freddie sighed. "Like this morning, she actually woke up early to go see him. She always makes me wait until at _least _one in the afternoon to see her."

"Sounds like someone with a crush," Gibby said in a singsong voice.

"I-no," Freddie said, shaking his head. "No, that's crazy."

"What's crazy?" Sam asked, coming downstairs, drying her hair with a towel.

"Um, coasters," Freddie said quickly, spotting a pile of coasters on the kitchen counter. "I mean, all you do it set your drink on them. Talk about pretty useless, huh?"

"Okay?" Sam said, tossing the towel aside. "Well, bye then."

"Wait, where are you going? I thought we could hang out," Freddie said.

"Dude, it's ten in the morning," Sam said. "I'm going back to bed."

"But-But you're already up," Freddie pointed up.

"Yeah, I know, and I need to fix that," Sam said. "Mama will get up to play in the mud, but not for anything else. I'll call you later, okay?" She gave her boyfriend a quick kiss on the lips and then quickly exited the apartment.

"Oh man," Freddie said, running his hand through his hair as he turned back to Gibby. "Gib, what-what if you're right? What if she still _does _have that little crush on Spencer? What am I going to do?"

"Well, we could 'dispose' of Spencer," Gibby suggested. "Just let me get my cat and-"

"No!" Freddie said. "Look, this is stupid. There's like, no way those two would ever get together! I mean, for one thing, Sam's in _high school_."

"She won't be forever…" Gibby said.

"Gibby!" Freddie exclaimed. "Are you _trying _to make me go crazy?"

…..

"All I'm saying is, next time, you go get your own donuts," Carly said, walking back into the apartment with her mud-covered brother. "Oh, hey, Freddie."

"Hey," Freddie said.

Carly turned to Spencer. "Why don't you go wash that mud off?"

"Fine," Spencer groaned, stomping off towards his room.

"So, is Sam here?" Carly asked. "She was playing in this insane mud pit when I left to get stranded at Amazing Glaze."

"She went back to bed," Freddie mumbled.

"Oh," Carly said, grabbing a bottle of water from her fridge. "Wanna do some homework then?"

"Sure," Freddie said. "But do you think I could talk to you about something first?"

"Ugh, Freddie, for the millionth time," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "I already know you stole my captains hat for my boat table upstairs. Stop trying to convince me a burglar took it!"

"No, not that," Freddie said. "Um, you remember how Sam accidently told us she had that 'little crush' on Spencer a few years ago?"

"Sure, when he was all prank crazy," Carly nodded, taking a sip of her water. "Why?"

"Well, do you think, maybe, she still has a crush on Spencer?" Freddie asked.

Carly spit out her water and burst out laughing. "What?"

"You know, I was just thinking," Freddie said. "She-She does spend a lot of time with him."

"You spend a lot of time with me," Carly reminded him.

"Yeah, but that's different," Freddie said.

"Freddie," Carly said. "A lot of girls get crushes on older guys. It's no big deal. When we were younger, I used to have a _huge _crush on Wendy's older brother, but I grew out of that. I'm sure Sam has grown out of her crush on Spencer too. I mean, she's with you now!"

"Yeah…" Freddie nodded. "Yeah, you're right."

"Good," Carly smiled. "Now let me just go grab my books and then we can get started on that Physics assignment."

"Cool," Freddie said.

Just as Carly was heading upstairs, Spencer walked out of his room, clean of mud.

"Hey, Fredo," Spencer said.

"Um, Spencer?" Freddie asked. "Can I talk to you about Sam?"

"Oh, um, you need 'that' advice?" Spencer frowned. "Look, I'm not really comfortable having those conversations. But I can refer you to an excellent-"

"It's nothing like that," Freddie said quickly. "Listen, um, you know that Sam used to have a little crush on you, right?"

"Oh, yeah, sure," Spencer nodded. "I guess it couldn't be helped. I am very easy on the eyes."

"You still have mud on your nose," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Oh, um, that's not mud…" Spencer said. "Anyway, continue."

"It's just, I know me and her are together and everything, and that you'd obviously never date Sam, I mean, come on, that's just a little weird, but I've just sort of been wondering if she still had a crush on you."

"Oh," Spencer said. "Well Freddie, I don't think she does. I mean, she thinks of me as just her best friend's brother. Wait, isn't that a song or something?"

"Yeah, it's probably real catchy," Freddie said quickly. "Anyway, I-I was just sort of wondering, if you could, you know, try to, you know, be as unattractive as you can around Sam."

"Freddie, please," Spencer scoffed. "You can't stop something as natural as that."

"Spencer," Carly said, coming back downstairs. "I told you to stop clipping your toenails in my room! I've got your gross DNA all over my carpet now!"

…

Later that day, once Sam had finally woken back up, her and Freddie were sitting in her room. She was playing on her laptop while he flipped through the television channels.

"Hey, Sam?" Freddie said, finally no longer to take it.

"Yeah?" Sam asked, looking up from her laptop.

"We need to talk about something."

Sam frowned. "Um, alright?"

"It's just," Freddie sighed, unsure of how to start this conversation. "I've been thinking lately, and I just need to know once and for all. That little crush you had on Spencer…is that like, you know, done?"

Sam looked at him. "What?"

"It's just you always seem to light up around him, you know, the same way you do for me," Freddie said. "And then there are times like today, when you do stuff for him, like get up early, that you never do for me."

Sam grinned. "Are you jealous of _Spencer_?"

"Well…kind of," Freddie admitted.

"Look," Sam said, sitting down next to him. "Yeah. When we were younger, I did sort of have a tiny little baby crush on him. But come on, that was just because I was around him all the time and he made me laugh. Now I sort of think of him as my brother. Heck, if I went out with him, I'd probably be to busy gagging to do much of anything else."

"Really?" Freddie asked.

"Really baby," Sam said, giving him a kiss.

"Thanks," Freddie smiled. "And I'm sorry I got a little crazy about this. It was ridiculous. I should've known."

"Yeah, you should've," Sam laughed. "But I guess you're forgiven…for now."

"Good," Freddie said, getting to his feet. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go."

"Where?"

"To hit Gibby with something hard."


	240. Chapter 240

_Ha_

"So if you were on a deserted island, you really would-?"

"Ugh, don't keep saying it, Benson," Sam moaned, her head resting on Freddie's shoulder.

"Sorry," Freddie grinned. "But it's not everyday that my ham-loving girlfriend admits that if she could either have a years supply of ham or me on a deserted island, she'd pick me."

"Keep it up and that answer will be changing," Sam said.

Freddie chuckled and leaned his head down to kiss her. "Come on, baby. You know what? If I was on a deserted island and I could either have an actual Sky Naut from _Galaxy Wars_ or you, I'd pick you."

Sam laughed, rolling her eyes. "Well yeah, because you can't exactly make out with a Sky Naut, now can you?"

"Very true," Freddie agreed as Sam placed her arms around Freddie's neck, kissing him again.

"Okay, guys, I'm in the room," Carly said, coming downstairs into her living room. "Can you keep your tongues to yourself now please?"

"Carly…" Sam whined. "We're not going to see each other until tomorrow night."

"Yeah, are lips are going to be lonely," Freddie said.

"You two are nauseating sometimes," Carly said, smiling. "And why aren't you guys seeing each other until tomorrow night? You don't have plans for tonight?"

"No," Sam replied. "My mom has this coupon for a free bucket of chicken, so her and I were going to eat while I try to help her with that scab infection on her neck."

"And my mom," Freddie said. "Wants us to get dinner together at some organic place that makes everything with spinach."

"That place should be banned," Sam said.

"Why don't you guys just have your moms eat together with the two of you?" Carly suggested. "You know, like a little couple-family bonding thing? That could be fun."

"Fun? Ha!" Sam scoffed. "My mom and his mom in the same room? What, do you want the universe to explode?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "That would be like in World of Warlords, if Aspartime and-"

"Don't!" Sam cut him off.

"Guys," Carly said, crossing her arms. "Are you seriously telling me that you've dating for almost a year now and your moms have never met each other?"

"Is it really that big of a deal?" Freddie asked. "I mean, we've met each others mom. Isn't that more important?"

"Well yeah, that's important and all, but I think it'd also be nice if your parents met," Carly said. "It would probably really strengthen your relationship even more."

Freddie looked at Sam. "Maybe she has a point."

"Wait," Sam frowned. "So you're saying you really want to do this?"

Freddie shrugged. "I could convince my mom to go out to eat some other time instead."

Sam sighed. "Fine. I'll help my mom with her scab tomorrow night."

"Aw, you'll see, you two will have fun," Carly smiled.

"Bring your mom to my place at six then," Sam said.

"You don't want to go to a restaurant?" Freddie asked.

"Can't," Sam said. "My mom's under house arrest for spraying a rabbi with a hose at the car wash."

"Ah," Freddie nodded. "Well, I'm sure this will go…well."

….

"Alright, mom," Freddie said as Marissa Benson stared in horror at the Puckett house, which had tiles hanging off the roof, rust stains on the walls and a horribly unkempt lawn. "Please just remember that Sam is my _girlfriend_, and that it's very, _very _important that this goes well. So promise me that no matter how badly you want to, you won't try to sanitize anything, okay?"

"But Freddie!" Marissa exclaimed. "You can practically _see _the germs covering this…_home_."

"Mom," Freddie sighed. "Just be nice. Who knows, maybe you and Sam's mom will have something in common."

"Fredward Benson!" Marissa snapped. "How dare you insinuate that I would have something in common with a woman who lets her home become such a filthy, disastrous breeding zone for germs!"

"Alright then," Freddie said, opening his car door. "Let's just get this over with. Just, you know, try to keep your comments to yourself."

Him and his mother walked up to the Puckett's front door. Freddie rang the bell as Marissa's hand twitched towards her handbag, clearly wanting nothing more than to grab a wipe from it and begin cleaning the area.

Sam opened the door. "Hey," she smiled at her boyfriend. Then she spotted Mrs. Benson. "Oh…good. You could make it. Lovely."

"Um, so where's your mom?" Freddie asked Sam quickly before his mother could respond to Sam's less-than-warm welcoming.

"She's finishing up her waxing session upstairs," Sam replied. "My Uncle Carmine's friend dropped off some pizza's from his Italian restaurant for dinner. And don't worry, Fredward. He brought over plenty of red pepper flakes and Parmesan cheese for you to spend an hour seasoning your slices with."

"Aw, thanks," Freddie grinned, leaning over towards Sam, about to give her a kiss.

"Ahem!" Mrs. Benson said loudly.

"Um, mom, I think you left the car unlocked," Freddie said.

"What?" Marissa exclaimed, her eyes widening. "Hoodlums can get in it!"

As she hurried back outside, Sam and Freddie exchanged a quick kiss.

"Alright, I'm all smooth and hairless," Pam Puckett said, walking down the stairs. "What's up, Freddie boy? That shirt's looking real good on you."

"Um, thanks," Freddie said as Sam rolled her eyes.

"Freddie, I don't know what you were talking about, the car was locked up just like I thought it was," Marissa said, re-entering the house. "I don't know why you would-oh, hello."

Pam and Marissa stared at each other. The two women could not have been more different. Pam frowned as she looked over Mrs. Benson's less-than-flattering sweater and sensible shoes while Marissa pursed her lips in clear disapproval over Pam's tight jeans and tank top that had been thrown over a bikini top.

"So, mom," Freddie said, breaking the awkward silence. "This is Sam's mom, Pam Puckett."

"Yeah, and this is Fredbag's mom, Craz-I mean, Marissa Benson," Sam told her mom.

"'Sup?" Pam asked, nodding at Marissa.

"Um, good evening," Marissa said. "What a…lovely home you have."

"Eh, it would look nicer if I would've kept dating that landscaper," Pam said. "But see, he had this weird thing going on that-"

"Okay!" Sam said. "Can we eat? I'm starving."

"Yeah, sounds like a good idea," Freddie said. "I can smell that pizza from here. Your Uncle Carmine's friend must be a great chef."

"Dude," Sam whispered, grabbing Freddie's wrist and holding him back as Pam and Marissa headed into the kitchen. "You really think this is going to work out? I mean, I know Carly said this was a good idea, but our moms are so…different."

"Baby, I know this might be a little weird," Freddie told her. "But our parents were going to have to meet eventually, right?"

"Well yeah, but I was thinking that would be in, you know, ten years or something," Sam said.

"Look, maybe they'll surprise us," Freddie said. "Now come on, why don't we go join them?"

"Fine," Sam sighed.

The couple went into the kitchen with their mothers. Pam had thrown a pile of paper plates onto the cluttered table and was now opening one of the pizza boxes on the kitchen counter.

"Alright, you want meat slam, right Sammie?" Pam asked.

"You know it," Sam nodded. She turned to Freddie. "Pepperoni good for you?"

"Of course," Freddie smiled.

"What about you?" Pam asked Marissa, taking a bite of her own pizza and chewing with her mouth open.

"Um," Marissa frowned, clearly not used to eating a dinner so high in sodium and fat. "I'll have a veggie slice."

"A what?" Pam asked. "You mean that put vegetables on pizzas now? What, is this some kind of new fad like those scented toothbrushes?"

"Just have a slice of pepperoni and pick off the meat, mom," Freddie sighed, beginning to season his own piece.

"Fine," Marissa said, pursing her lips. "If we're all just going to through nutrition to the wind…"

"Hey, pizza's plenty nutritious," Pam defended. "You've got your tomato sauce, which is a vegetable-"

"Actually, tomatoes are fruits," Marissa corrected. "If you subscribed to _Produce Biweekly_, you would've seen the very heated debate over the topic."

"What? Pfft, that's a load of chiz," Pam scoffed. "Anyone with half a brain in their head knows tomatoes are vegetables."

"They have seeds," Marissa said. "Which makes them a fruit."

"Yeah, but fruit has to be sweet," Pam said. "Have you ever had a sweet tomatoes, lumpy sweater?"

Marissa gasped. "Then explain the lemon…too-tight top!"

"You don't like my top?" Pam asked. "Fine." And with that, she took off her shirt, revealing a bikini top that had ketchup stains all over it.

As Marissa began to preach her views on this particular article of clothing, Sam and Freddie looked at each other, and both got up from the table, leaving their feuding mothers.

"Well," Sam said as her and Freddie sat down on the couch with their pizza. "I think that went well."

"You want to go break up their little argument?" Freddie asked as the shouts continued to sound from the kitchen.

Sam rose and eyebrow. "Do I look stupid?"

"You know, I still say this could've gone worse," Freddie said, putting his arm around Sam.

"Yeah, I guess," Sam nodded. "At least your mom didn't see that tattoo my mom got on her thigh of that mermaid."

"And at least my mom left the pamphlets on housekeeping that she wanted to bring at home," Freddie said.

Sam chuckled. "Well, we got Carly off our backs. That's one thing, isn't it?"

"True," Freddie agreed. "So…you think our moms would notice if we stayed in here for awhile…by ourselves?"

Sam smiled. "I think they're distracted enough…"


	241. Chapter 241

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 223, where Freddie got sent to mall jail after "confronting" the guy at the mall who was hitting on Sam. **

…**.**

_Rod_

"Well, baby," Sam said happily as her and her husband walked back into their home. "How was it?"

"How was what?" Freddie mumbled.

"Aw, is someone bitter about being arrested?" Sam grinned.

"It's not funny, Sam," Freddie said. "I have a criminal record now!"

"Oh calm down," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "It was _mall jail_. As long as you pay the fine, nothing goes on you precious record."

"I can't calm down, Sam!" Freddie snapped.

"Wow, mall jail turned _you_ grumpy," Sam said.

"Sorry," Freddie sighed. "I'm just still a little angry over this whole thing."

"Why? Because some jerky guy from the Pottery Barrel was hitting on me at the mall?" Sam asked. "Baby, don't worry about it! I took care of it. Trust me, he'll think twice about flirting with married chicks now."

"Yeah, but what about the next guy?" Freddie said, sinking down onto the couch.

"Next guy?" Sam frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"Come on, Sam, you're hot," Freddie said.

"Um, thank you?" Sam said, raising an eyebrow. "But again, what are you talking about?"

"Sam, guys are always going to hit on you," Freddie said miserably. "I mean, look at you!"

"Freddie," Sam said gently, sitting down next to him. "Even if a guy _does _hit on me, and it doesn't happen _that _often, do you really think I'd do anything other than flash my wedding ring and tell him to get lost?"

"No, of course not," Freddie said. "I know you'd never actually pursue anything. It's just…well, it gets a little hard, you know. Seeing all these guys chase after your wife."

"But I told you, it's not like it's a daily thing, Fredifer," Sam said, putting her arm around him. "Since we've been together, its happened _maybe _ten times."

"Yeah, those are just the ones who hit on you to your face," Freddie said. "You remember last week when we went out to dinner?"

"Sure," Sam nodded.

"Well when you got up to go to the bathroom, one of the guys at the table next to you kept saying how hot you looked and that you-you must be blind for being with someone like me." He glanced down at the floor as he said this.

"Freddie, I remember those guys," Sam said. "And trust me, you were a million times more attractive than any of them were."

"You're just saying that because you're married to me," Freddie mumbled.

"No, I'm not," Sam said sincerely. "And you can't let this get to you. So a couple of jerky guys hit on me. That doesn't mean anything! You don't see me getting all bent out of shape about chicks hitting on you."

"Girls don't hit on me, baby," Freddie said. "I think we both know you're the looker in this relationship."

"Really?" Sam said. "In case you haven't been looking in the mirror for the past ten years, you've got yourself some nice muscles there. Trust me, girls notice that. And you know what? Come on, I'm going to prove it to you."

"Um, how?" Freddie frowned as Sam stood up.

"You'll see," Sam smiled. "Now just come with me."

…

"Why'd we come to the Groovy Smoothie?" Freddie asked as Sam led him into the restaurant.

"Because," Sam said simply. She held out her hand. "Give me your wedding ring."

"What?" Freddie explained.

"Just do it," Sam insisted.

"But why?" Freddie asked.

"Because you're _crazy _if you don't think chicks are checking you out, Benson," Sam said. "But unlike most guys, girls aren't total _pigs_, and if they see a ring, they'll back off…usually."

"Sam, this is insane," Freddie said.

"No it's not," Sam said. "Now give me your wedding ring before I take it off for you myself, and I can't promise I'll be gentle about that."

"Fine, fine," Freddie said quickly, sliding off his ring and handing it to Sam. "So now what?"

"Okay, you see that lady at the counter?" Sam asked, nodding towards a tall red head.

"Yeah," Freddie said.

"Go over to her," Sam instructed. "Compliment her shoes, and then just wait and see what happens."

"You want me to compliment her shoes?" Freddie said.

"Yup," Sam smiled. "Now go!"

"You know, I still don't get you sometimes," Freddie said as he headed over to the counter towards the woman Sam had pointed out.

"Um…hi," Freddie said.

"Hi," the woman replied, looking up from a text message on her phone.

"You, um," Freddie began, looking back at Sam who nodded for him to continue. "You-You have really nice shoes."

The woman stared at him. "I have nice shoes?"

"Yeah, well, you know they're really…black," Freddie said.

"Wow," the woman smiled. "That's so sweet. I don't think a guy has ever complimented my shoes before. I'm Amber, by the way."

"Oh, um, nice to-"

"Hey, you know what," Amber said, stepping closer to Freddie. "Why don't we go and get some coffee?"  
"Oh!" Freddie said, his eyes widening. "No, I'm-"

"Or you know what?" Amber said, placing a hand on Freddie's shoulder. "We could go camping this weekend! I just got a new fishing rod and-"

"Okay, I think we're done here," Sam said, stepping over to Freddie's side.

"Excuse me?" Amber snapped, crossing her arms. "Just who are you?"

"His wife," Sam smirked, putting her arm around Freddie. "So beat it."

"I don't see a ring on his finger," Amber said.

"Yeah, well," Sam said, sliding Freddie's ring back onto his finger. "Now you do."

Amber gave Sam one last glare before stomping out of the Groovy Smoothie.

"You see?" Sam said, looking up at Freddie. "You get hit on."

"Huh…" Freddie said slowly. "That was…interesting."

"Don't get used to it," Sam said sternly. "But I told you that plenty of other women think you're hot."

"Maybe," Freddie shrugged, smiling at Sam. "But there's still only one who I actually care about."


	242. Chapter 242

**AN-Sorry for the long wait! Anyway, you guys seem to really like the chapters where the trio's kids sort of go through the same experiences they did when they were their age, so hope you like this chapter!**

…**.**

_Ideal_

"Dad, can't you just chill out," Emma Benson said, rolling her eyes at her father.

"Chill out?" Freddie repeated. "How can I chill out after hearing the greatest news of my life?"

Sam, who was sitting next to her husband, rolled her eyes and continued to eat ice cream right out of the container.

"I just got a job," Emma said. "It's really no big deal."

"But you got a job at the greatest place of employment imaginable!" Freddie said.

"It's the Pear Store," Sam pointed out.

"Exactly!"

"Look, it's only part-time," Emma said. "I was at the mall and I was in the Pear Store fiddling around with one of the computers and the manager saw how good I was and offered me a job."

"We're proud of you, Em," Sam said. "Hopefully you'll be better at that job than your father was."

"We agreed to never bring that up again!" Freddie said. He turned back to Emma. "I can't believe we're not celebrating; this is a huge deal!"

"Quincy was going to take me to get some steaks, actually," Emma said.

"I didn't mean celebrating with your boyfriend," Freddie mumbled. "I meant celebrating with your family!"

"Dude, let go have fun," Sam said.

"Fine," Freddie said. "But Emma, on your first day you're going to have to give me an update on how that place is doing. I want to know what type of processors are being used, how those new rams are holding up, how-"

Just then the front door of the Benson's house opened and Quincy Gibson walked in.

"Hey, Quince," Freddie greeted the boy. "Did your dad give you my digital camera to return to me?"

"Um, no, I think he actually lost that when he was ice skating the other day," Quincy replied.

"Aw man!" Freddie said. "That had a 75 Gigabyte memory!"

"You ready to go buy me steaks?" Emma asked, grinning at Quincy.

"Yeah," Quincy nodded. "But before we go, guess what?"

"What?" Emma asked.

"You know how we've been saying that we should start doing more things together now that we're a couple?"

"Um, I don't think I've ever said that," Emma said. "That sounds more like something that would've come out of _your _nubby mouth."

"Well," Quincy continued, ignoring Emma's comment. "I was just at the mall and I got, brace yourself, a job at the Pear Store!"

Sam nearly chocked on her ice cream.

"What?" Emma frowned.

"We'll be working together!" Quincy smiled.

"Um, Freddie, come help me with the…thing, in the other room," Sam said, getting up off the couch.

"What other thing?" Freddie said.

"Just come on, will you?" Sam said, grabbing her husband's arm and yanking him to his feet.

"Aren't you excited about this?" Quincy asked Emma as Sam and Freddie left the room.

"Er, Quincy? You don't know anything about computers," Emma said. "What made you think you could work at the Pear Store? The largest seller of _computers _in the world?"

"I know some things about computers," Quincy pointed out.

"You nearly wiped out your whole hard drive trying to save your history paper the other day!"

"Okay, fine, I'm not really knowledgeable about technology like you are," Quincy admitted. "But all you need to work at the Pear Store is good salesmen skills. And I'm an _awesome _sales person."

"You've never sold anything in your life," Emma scoffed.

"Come on, Emma," Quincy said. "You'll see, this will be good for us. You and me working at the same job…It will really strengthen our bond as a couple."

"You were watching Dr. Phyllis reruns with your dad again, weren't you?" Emma asked, rolling her eyes.

"Well yeah, that's what we do every Thursday night," Quincy nodded.

"Fine," Emma sighed. "I _guess _we can try working at the same place."

…..

"So, Quincy's really working at the Pear Store with Emma now?" Carly asked Sam as the two strolled through the mall, sipping coffees.

"Yup," Sam nodded. "Crazy, huh?"

"I think it's sort of sweet," Carly smiled. "Quincy's obviously trying to spend some more time with Emma."

"Yeah, but you know how bad with technology Quincy is," Sam said. "Seriously, he must be the one kid who doesn't know how to work a PearPad properly."

"Well sure, he's not the _ideal_ employee, but maybe Emma will teach him," Carly reasoned.

"Or she could get so annoyed with him that she winds up punching Quincy in the face and Freddie and I get to write another check to Gibby to pay for his hospital bill," Sam said. "Now which one do you think is more likely?"

"Well we can see just how they're doing in a minute," Carly said. "The Pear Store is right over there."

"You want to go bug them on their first day?" Sam frowned.

"That's what all parents do," Carly said.

"No, no, I think that's just you," Sam smiled.

"Are we gonna go or not?" Carly asked. "I need to buy a new laptop case anyway."

"Yeah, okay," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

Carly and Sam headed into the Pear Store. They spotted Emma by one of the desktop displays, looking on Ribs Plus's new website.

"Hey, Emma," Carly smiled.

"Oh, hey," Emma said, looking up from the computer.

"Aren't you supposed to be working or something?" Sam asked.

"Hey, I sold eight laptops and a dozen pearphones already," Emma said. "Now I'm taking my break."

"Wow, she's good," Carly said to Sam.

"Shoosh yeah she is, she got that salesperson gene from me, not Freddie," Sam said.

"So where's Quincy?" Carly asked.

"Well he was supposed to change the backgrounds on all the laptops," Emma said. "But somehow he managed to screw that up and gave all of them this weird virus, so now he's in the back doing inventory."

"Oh, that's…nice," Carly said.

"No, it's lame," Emma said. "I still don't get why he had to go and get a job here doing something he's beyond terrible at."

"Oh come on, he's trying to be nice, or, you know, some chiz like that," Sam said.

"He spent an hour this morning trying to turn on a PearPod," Emma said.

"An hour?" Sam repeated. "Alright, that kid has no business working here."

"You guys!" Carly said, shaking her head. "It's sweet! Am I the only one who sees this?"

"Hey, Emma, are the PearPad screens supposed to go blue like this?" Quincy asked, walking out from the back of the store.

"No, what did you do to it? I thought you were just supposed to be counting things back there!" Emma exclaimed, grabbing the Pearpad from him.

"I know, but then I thought it would be really helpful for me to install PearOx 8 to all the devices back there," Quincy said.

"And I think we're done here," Sam said. "Come on, Carls."

"But I still have to get my laptop case!"

"You just got one for your birthday," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Fine," Carly sighed.

…..

"So how was work?" Ashton asked her sister later that day as Emma entered their bedroom.

"Sucky," Emma mumbled, kicking off her shoes and hoping onto her bed.

"I thought you were excited to be working at the Pear Store," Clarissa, who was sitting on Ashton's bed, painting her nails, pointed out.

"I was," Emma said. "Until Quincy had to go and get a job there too."

"Oh yeah, Ashton told me about that," Clarissa said.

"Was it really that bad?" Ashton asked.

"Yes!" Emma said. "He's terrible at everything technology related! Everyone knows that, so why couldn't he go get a job over at some lame sweater store or something?"

"Because _clearly_ he wanted to spend time doing things _together_," Clarissa said.

"Yeah, he's just trying to be a good boyfriend, Emma," Ashton said, rolling her eyes.

"He can be a good boyfriend not bugging me at my job," Emma snapped.

"Unbelievable," Ashton said, shaking her head. "You're impossible, you know that?"

"No, _you're _impossible," Emma said, getting to her feet and heading out of the room. She headed downstairs to the kitchen where Sam was sitting at the table, adding large amounts of spicy mustard to a hot dog.

"Oh, hey Em," Sam said, looking up from her snack. "How was work?"

"I _thought _it would be cool," Emma said, grabbing a brownie from the fridge. "But of course my dorkish boyfriend had to go and _ruin_ that."

"Emma," Sam said. "He didn't _ruin_ it. He was just trying-"

"If one more person tells me he was trying to be sweet, I'm going to-"

"Look," Sam said. "You know that Quincy pretty much _despises _technology, right?"

"Exactly!" Emma said. "So why the heck is he working at the Pear Store?"

"Oh, I don't know," Sam said. "Maybe because his _girlfriend_ likes technology? Come on, you saw how excited he was to be working with you."

"Well…yeah," Emma admitted slowly.

"You know how your dad used to work at the Pear Store?"

Emma nodded.

"Well…we never really told any of you kids this, but during that time, I got a job there too," Sam said.

"_You_?" Emma frowned.

"Yup," Sam said. "And you want to know why?"

"Because it was good money?"

"Well, yeah," Sam agreed. "But because I thought that if I started to become more interested in stuff your dad was, we'd have a…_better _relationship. This was right after we broke up, and right around the time I was starting to feel _really _crummy about it. Now I know that you and Quincy have a pretty good relationship right now, but just realize that Quincy didn't get this job just to bug you, okay?"

Emma nodded. "I guess for someone who's terrible around technology, he _is _being pretty dedicated to having a job at the Pear Store. I mean, sure he screwed a million things up today, but he _did _make a pretty decent display stand for the new phone cases…You really think he got this job to be closer? Not just to big the chiz out of me?"

"Well out of the two of you, I'd say _you'd _be the one to get a job just to bug him," Sam smiled.

"Yeah, that's true…" Emma agreed. "Maybe I'll go call him…Wait, are you eating the last hot dog?"

"Yup," Sam said happily, taking a bite of the hot dog. "Tough luck, kid."

….

"Wait, so you visited Emma at the Pear Store without me?" Freddie frowned.

"Yup," Sam nodded, flipping through the channels on the television.

"But I could've given her advice there!" Freddie exclaimed.

"About what? How to _not _sell stuff?" Sam grinned.

Freddie opened his mouth to retort, but was interrupted by the doorbell.

"Go get the door," Sam said.

"I'm going because I want to, not because you told me," Freddie mumbled as he headed to the door.

"Whatever you want to tell yourself, baby," Sam smiled.

Freddie opened the door. "Oh, hey Quincy," Freddie said. "You here to see Emma?"

"Yeah," Quincy nodded. "And to tell you that my dad said that he found your camera, but he has to figure out a way to get the chocolate chips out of the lens."

"That's it, I'm _never _lending Gibby my things again!" Freddie said firmly.

"Emma's upstairs, Quincy," Sam said.

"Thanks," Quincy replied, heading upstairs.

"Door open!" Freddie called after him.

Quincy climbed the stairs and walked down the hallway to Emma and Ashton's bedroom door and knocked.

"Finally," Emma said, opening the door to let him in.

"What was so important that I had to rush over here in the middle of my pottery club meeting?" Quincy asked.

"You," Emma said, leading Quincy to her desk, which was covered with various Pear devices. "Are finally going to learn to be technologically skilled."


	243. Chapter 243

_Token_

Carly yawned as she walked downstairs, still wearing her pajamas. She headed into the kitchen, but stopped as she spotted Sam sitting at the table eating a bowl of cereal.

"Hey, morning," Sam said, looking up from her breakfast.

"Um, morning," Carly frowned. "Since when are you up at-" she looked down at her pearphone. "Nine forty-three."

"Oh well, you know, thought I'd get a jump on the day," Sam shrugged.

Carly raised an eyebrow. "_You _want to get a jump on the day?"

"I have…things to eat," Sam said lamely.

Carly shook her head, too tired to process her best friend's odd behavior. She walked over to the fridge and grabbed the orange juice. As she was pouring her drink, though, she looked over at Sam and noticed something strange.

"Hey, didn't you wear that outfit yesterday?" Carly asked.

"Um…no," Sam said lamely. She may be a world-class liar, but Carly was the one person Sam had trouble lying to.

"Yeah, you did," Carly said. "Oh, Sam. Did you try taking a ride in your washing machine again? Is that why you have to wear dirty clothes?"

"No!" Sam said.

"Wait a minute," Carly said, still examining Sam's apparel. "Those aren't your sweatpants…you were wearing jeans yesterday. Those look like Freddie's sweatpants."

"Huh? Do they?" Sam said.

"They _are_ Freddie's sweatpants!" Carly gasped. "Now it all makes sense! You're wearing your same clothes because you didn't go home because you slept over at-"

"Yes, yes okay!" Sam hissed. "I crashed at Freddie's place. But his mom only has vegie flakes for cereal, so I had to come over here."

"Oh my God!" Carly said, sitting down across from Sam. "This is huge!"

"Not really," Sam said. "I sleep over here all the time, you know."

"You're not dating me!" Carly said. "So tell me everything. When you say you slept there, did you just sleep, or was there…other things."

Sam showed a small smile. "Maybe…"

"No way!" Carly squealed. "Was-Was this the first time you guys-"

"Yeah," Sam nodded.

"So how was it?" Carly grinned. "I changed my mind about wanting you to tell me everything. I think you and Freddie are adorable and all, but I don't think I'd ever be able to get those…images out of my head if I heard all that."

"It was…fun," Sam smiled.

"Do you feel different? Do feel all happy and giddy now?" Carly asked.

"Carls, please, let's not make this a chick flick," Sam scoffed.

"Hey, guess what?" Spencer exclaimed, running out from his bedroom. "I just found some of my old tokens for Funk E. Festers! I'm gonna go see if they'll let me use these instead of those new game cards. Hey, what's Sam doing here so early? I thought she had a No-Waking-Before-Noon policy?"

"Um, why don't you go work on your jelly sculpture?" Carly said quickly.

"Okay," Spencer shrugged, heading back into his room.

Once Spencer had disappeared, Carly turned back to Sam, about to ask her something else, when the front door of the apartment opened and Freddie came in.

"Sam, you left your-Oh, Carly…You're up," Freddie said, stopping in his tracks.

"Yup," Carly grinned at him.

"She knows," Sam told her boyfriend.

"She knows?" Freddie repeated, his eyes widening. "Sam!"

"Hey, you try keeping something like that from her!" Sam defended. "She can sniff this kind of stuff out from a mile away."

"It's true," Carly said proudly.

"Yeah, well," Freddie mumbled, his cheeks reddening.

"Oh come on, you don't have to be embarrassed," Carly told him. "You and Sam have been dating for awhile. And we all know when a guy and a girl get _those _feelings-"

"Carly! This isn't health class!" Sam said.

"Alright, alright," Carly laughed. "I'm gonna go change. After that we can go grab some smoothies, sound like a plan?"

"As long as I'm not paying for my own drink, sure," Sam nodded.

"Have you ever paid?" Carly asked, rolling her eyes.

"No, and I plan to keep it that way," Sam said.


	244. Chapter 244

_Passion_

"I-I can't believe we're finally here," Sam said as she jumped out of her and Freddie's van. "I've dreamed of this day for so long, but now it's finally here!"

"Sam, it's a meat festival," Carly said, rolling her eyes as she got out of her own car, which was parked next to the Benson's.

"Between her and Emma, it's all I've been hearing about for the past week, Carls," Freddie sighed. "Those two are really passionate about this meat festival."

"Yeah, because it's the biggest event of the year," Emma said, hopping out of the car. "Bigger than Christmas, Halloween, Fourth of July…"

"It's too bad Ashton's a vegetarian and didn't want to come," Clarissa said, heading over by Emma.

"Her loss," Emma scoffed.

"Can we go in already?" Tyler asked his parents. "I can smell the barbecue chicken from here."

"We have to wait for Quincy to get here," Freddie said.

"Ugh, why's Gibby got to drive like a ninety-year old woman?" Sam moaned.

"There he is now," Carly said as Gibby's van pulled into the parking lot.

"Finally!" Sam exclaimed as Gibby parked and got out of the car. "What took you guys so long?"

"There was this awesome yogurt stand we passed on the way," Gibby said, spooning out some yogurt from a container. "Anyone want some peach yogurt?"

"No one wants your dang yogurt when we're feet away from a meat festival!" Sam snapped, grabbing his yogurt container and throwing it on the ground.

"Okay," Freddie sighed. "Let's head in. The place closes down at five, so lets meet back at the exit at five till, okay?"

"Alright, alright, bye!" Emma said, grabbing her ticket from her father and then pulling Quincy.

"Wow, Quincy's going to wind up spending a fortune with Emma," Carly said to Freddie, chuckling.

"You mean like I'm going to be doing with Sam?" Freddie asked.

"Fredpus, come on already!" Sam said, grabbing Freddie's shirtsleeve. "I want to get some of those one-pound corndogs they have here!"

"Sam! Careful with my-" Freddie started, but was interrupted by a loud ripping noise as his shirt sleeve pulled apart from the rest of his shirt.

"Well," he sighed. "That's just fantastic."

…..

"This place is amazing!" Emma said happily as she took a bite out of the third turkey leg that she had made Quincy buy her.

"There's just insane amounts of meat," Quincy said as him, Emma and Clarissa walked through the festival.

"There's games," Clarissa pointed out. "And over there there's a stand where you can get any type of meat painted on your arm-Oh my God, Emma! Look at the hot guy working that stand!"

"You gonna go over there and flirt it up?" Emma grinned knowingly.

"Shoosh yeah I am!" Clarissa said, quickly fluffing her hair as she ran over to the stand.

"Well," Emma sighed as she watched her best friend disappear. "Guess I'm stuck with you then."

"Thanks," Quincy said, as he rolled his eyes.

"Eh, guess it won't be that bad," Emma smiled, giving her boyfriend a quick kiss. "Come on, let's go to the ribs station now!"

"Can't we do something _I _want to do now?" Quincy asked.

"Fine," Emma said. "What do _you _want to do, Quincstub?"

"How about we go look around that historical museum they have set up over there?" Quincy asked. "We can learn about how people in the olden days used to eat their meat."

"A museum?" Emma frowned. "As in an educational activity? What's wrong with you? How many times did your dad drop you when you were a baby?"

"I'm pretty sure it was only three times," Quincy said. "But come on, it will be cool. And how about this? Right after we finish up there we go over to the pork chop contest and you can beat everyone there?"

"Will you buy me some steak too?" Emma asked hopefully.

"I suppose," Quincy smiled.

"Then you have yourself a deal," Emma said happily. "Now lets go get this lame museum out of the way."

…..

"Do you realize you probably made your poor husband spend 300 bucks on you?" Carly asked Sam later that evening as the party made its way out of the festival; Freddie lagging behind the rest of the group a bit since he was carrying the multiple bags of souvenirs Sam had made him purchase.

"Hey, we're married; that's my money too," Sam defended.

"Well, all in all I'd say this was a good day, though," Carly said. "Everyone had fun, didn't they?"

"Yeah, other than me loosing that pork chop contest," Emma mumbled darkly.

"Hey, second's not bad," Quincy told her.

"Yeah, and let's be honest, did you really think you could beat your mom?" Freddie asked, finally catching up to everyone. "I mean, I know you eat a lot, but Sam's a different story…"

"I play to win, you should know that by now," Sam smirked as they reached their cars.

"Oh man, we need to get back home; I think I forgot to feed my new hamster!" Gibby said, looking at his watch. "Come on, Quincy! Herve needs his three meals a day!"

"Bye, Em, I'll call you later," Quincy said, rolling his eyes at his father.

"We'll see you guys later too," Carly said as her and Clarissa headed back to their car. "Bye!"

"You know," Freddie said, loading up all of the meat into the back of the car as the kids got into the front seat. "I'm gonna smell like meat for the next few days from carrying this all day."

"Maybe that will help you later on tonight…" Sam whispered in his ear, giving him a quick kiss.

"I can't believe how much meat you got Quincy to buy for you," Tyler said to Emma as his parents got into the car and started the engine.

"Yeah, well," Emma said, biting into a piece of jerky. "I've got him trained."

"Nice work," Sam said, grinning at her daughter, giving her a high five.


	245. Chapter 245

**AN-Hey, I already wrote a separate oneshot about what happened after the finale called iGoodbye Aftermath, but I got another request, so I figured I would just do another version of it!**

…**.**

_Termination_

"So then Weasel just ate the whole apple, just like that!" Gibby said to Freddie as the two walked into Ridgeway. It was the Monday after Carly had abruptly left for Italy with her father; their first day of school without their brunette best friend. It felt weird to Freddie, and he wondered how long it would take before he got used to not having Carly living across the hall from him anymore.

"I wish I could've brought Weasel to school with me," Gibby sighed as the boys reached Gibby's locker.

"Don't you think you should've thought of a better name than Weasel for that thing?" Freddie asked.

"Weasel's a good name!" Gibby defended. "And for your information, Weasel's not a thing. Weasel's a _he. _See I found out yesterday when I was trying to give him a bath-"

"Okay, okay, don't want to hear that," Freddie said quickly. He leaned against the rows of lockers as Gibby opened his own. Suddenly he spotted Sam walking through the school's front door. She had her headphones in and was heading quickly towards her locker.

Freddie hadn't seen or heard from Sam since they had said goodbye to Carly. He knew that this whole thing had really hit her hard; her and Carly were closer than most sisters were. He was actually a bit surprised to see her here today; Sam was never a fan of Mondays, and usually only came to school on them because Carly would use her 'Carly Charm' on her.

"Hey, I'm gonna go talk to Sam," Freddie said to Gibby.

"'Kay," Gibby replied.

Swinging his backpack over his shoulder, Freddie meandered over to the blonde, who was shoving a book into her locker.

"Hey, how you holding up?" Freddie asked Sam.

Sam frowned as she turned to look at him. "What? What do you mean how am I holding up?"

"You know, I figured since this is your first day of school without Carly, you'd be a little down," Freddie reasoned. "It's weird, isn't it?"

"Yeah, I guess," Sam shrugged, turning back to her locker.

"So have you gotten a chance to talk to Carly since she got into Italy?" Freddie continued.

"I've just texted her," Sam replied simply. "We're supposed to webchat sometime this week; once we figure out the time difference."

"Ah, well let me know when you do that; I want to say hey to her too," Freddie said. "Anyway, you wanna go the Smoothie after school today? T-Bo was telling me this morning that-"

"Can't," Sam said, closing her locker.

"Fine, I'll buy your smoothie," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "But you know, one of these days you should-"

"Dude, I'm not not going just because I don't want to spend money," Sam said. "I just…can't."

"Why not?" Freddie asked.

"Because maybe I'm _busy_," Sam said sharply, slamming her locker shut.

"Sam," Freddie sighed. "I know you're upset and all-"

"I'm not upset," Sam said.

"Carly is your best friend, it's completely natural to-"

"I'm gonna be late for class," Sam said.

"What?" Freddie frowned. "You've never cared about-" But Sam was already heading down the hallway.

…..

"You know, I'm thinking of getting a cat," Spencer said, handing Freddie a plate of spaghetti tacos.

"A cat?" Freddie repeated.

"Yeah, you know, a nice orangeish one," Spencer nodded.

"Okay…any reason why?" Freddie asked.

"Because it's so lonely here all by myself!" Spencer pointed out. "If I get a cat at least I'll have those shanagins to entertain myself with!"

"Alright then," Freddie said, taking a bite of his taco.

"Didn't Sam say she got Frothy from a really cheap breeder here in Seattle?" Spencer asked. "Call her and tell her to come over here so she can give me the deats!"

Freddie sighed and set his snack down. "Sam's sort of, well, she's been avoiding me since Carly left."

"Really?" Spencer frowned. "Why?"

"I don't know why!" Freddie said, getting to his feet, pacing. "But all this week, she won't hang out with me, she barely talks to me, she doesn't insult me…it's weird!"

"Well her and Carly were super close," Spencer reasoned. "This must be hard for her."

"Yeah, it's hard for me too, Carly was my friend too," Freddie said. "But you'd think she'd at least want to hang out with a _friend _during all this."

"Maybe there's something else going on then," Spencer suggested.

"Like what?" Freddie asked.

"I don't know," Spencer shrugged. "Why don't you go over there and ask her?"

"Yeah…" Freddie said thoughtfully. "Okay…I can do that. I'll see you later, Spence."

"Remember to ask about the cat breeder!" Spencer called after Freddie as he left the apartment.

….

Freddie walked up Sam's driveway. He had taken the bus here, and was still cringing at the fact that he had been sitting on someone's used gum for the past twenty minutes. He rang the doorbell and waited for Sam to answer.

It took Sam nearly three minutes before she finally opened the door.

"I thought you were the pizza guy," she said, disappointment evident in her voice.

"Hi to you too," Freddie said. "Can I come in?"

Sam didn't reply, but stepped back so he could come into the house.

"Your mom home?" Freddie asked.

"No, she's getting her stomached tucked…again," Sam said.

"Ah," Freddie nodded. "So what have you been up to?"

"Nothing," Sam mumbled.

"Sam," Freddie sighed. "What's been going on with you? Ever since Carly left it's like you just want to be by yourself. Have you ever thought that being around Spencer, Gibby, and I, your _other _friends, might help you feel better about Carly moving to another continent? We're upset about it too, but maybe-"

"Of course _you're _upset," Sam scoffed.

Freddie frowned, confused. "Huh?"

"I know you two kissed before she left," Sam said. It wasn't an accusation. Sam didn't say this angrily. She simply stated it. Yet those words still hit Freddie hard.

"You-You know?" Freddie asked.

"Carly mentioned it when I texted her the night she got into Italy," Sam replied. "So you're back into that, huh?"  
Again, she said this so casually that Freddie was taken aback.

"Back into what?"

"Back into chasing Carly," Sam said, suddenly becoming very interested in staring at her shoes.

"Chasing Carly?" Freddie repeated. "I-No! I mean, yeah, we kissed, but that didn't mean anything. It was more of a, you know, a goodbye-to-a-good-friend kiss. Neither of us felt anything romantic from it, I mean, _I _didn't."

"Carly didn't either," Sam said. "I just thought that you…never mind."

"Um, okay," Freddie said, still a bit confused about the conversation. "Anyway, like I was saying-"

"So why'd you ask it?" Sam asked suddenly.

"Asked what?" Freddie asked, his brain beginning to hurt from the many sudden turns this conversation was taking.

"You know," Sam mumbled. "When I called that day to tell you about Spencer not taking Carly to the dance…"

Freddie didn't need any clarification on that. "You mean why I asked you if you wanted to get back together?"

Sam nodded.

"Um," Freddie said, shifting uncomfortably. "I-I don't really know. It was just sort of a spur-of-the-moment thought."

"So you don't want to get back together then?" Sam asked softly. She wasn't looking at him, and was focusing her attention to the ground.

"I, well, I-I haven't-" Freddie stammered.

"No, I-I figured you didn't really want to," Sam said quickly, snapping her head up, and for a wild second, Freddie could've sworn her blue eyes looked a tad watery. "I figured it was just some crazy thought you had…I've got to go, um, get changed now for, um church, so just-just let yourself out and…yeah."

"Sam-" Freddie started, but before he could say anything further, Sam had run towards the stairs and hurried up them.

Freddie stood motionless for a moment, before finally unsticking his feet and running up the stairs after Sam.

"Sam," he said, reaching her door and jiggling the knob. "Sam, open up! I just want to talk to you!"

"I told you; I have to go to church!" Sam called from her room.

"You do not!" Freddie said. "Look, I don't know what's going on here, Sam, but I'm trying to help you! Shutting everyone out like this isn't how you should be handling this! Just because Carly left doesn't mean our friendship just terminated! So I'll just sit out here until you realize that!"

Sam's door swung open. "Why do you have to be so dang irritating about this?" she snapped, and Freddie saw that her cheeks looked slightly tearstained. "Why can't you just leave me alone and go do some stupid tech chiz on your computer or whatever it is that stupid nubs like you do?"

"Because I'm _worried _about you!" Freddie exclaimed.

Sam rolled her eyes. "Yeah, okay. Is that some spur-of-the-moment thought to?"

"What?" Freddie frowned.

"Never mind," Sam said, and she turned to head back into her room.

"Sam," Freddie said softly, something finally hitting him. "Are you upset about Carly leaving or about what I said over the phone?"

Sam stopped, her back to him.

"Sam," he said again.

"Can you just leave?" she said loudly.

"No, not until you talk!" Freddie said firmly.

"Dude-"

"Just talk, and then I promise, I'll-"

"Both, okay!" Sam snapped. "There, you happy? _Now _can you leave me alone?"

"So you're upset that I asked if you wanted to get back together?" Freddie asked. He didn't know why, but he felt slightly disappointed by the fact that this had apparently annoyed her so much.

"No," Sam said, still with her back towards him. "That you said you didn't mean it…"

Freddie blinked. "You-You mean downstairs?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "You said you didn't mean it when you asked-"

"I didn't say I didn't mean it," Freddie said quickly.

"Fine, you said you didn't know why you said it; same thing," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Well, yeah, I don't know why I choose that exact second when you called me to just say it out of the blue like that, sure," Freddie said. "But that doesn't mean I didn't mean it."

Sam turned a little, so that she was now facing him a bit. "Oh."

"Yeah," Freddie said awkwardly, putting his hands in his pockets.

The two were silent for a few moments.

"So," Freddie finally said. "You know…you never _did _answer the question."

Sam smirked. "If I remember right, I think I asked _you _the question right after, and you didn't answer either."

"Yeah, but I asked first, so you should answer me first," Freddie said.

"That's not how this works, Benson," Sam said, crossing her arms. "You answer _me _first because we play by my rules."

Freddie knew that no matter how long he argued this point with Sam, he'd never win. So it looked like he had only one option left…

"Fine," Freddie said, taking a deep breath. "I-yes. I mean…we _did _say we'd try _us _again someday, didn't we?"

"Well, sure," Sam shrugged. "But didn't we also say we'd wait until you became more abnormal and I became more normal?"

"Do you really think that's ever going to happen?" Freddie asked.

Sam smiled. "Probably not."

"So…what do you say then?" Freddie asked. "Wanna, you know, get back together?"

Sam stared at him for a moment, apparently in deep contemplation. "On one condition."

"What?" Freddie asked.

"We get to say that you're the one who to get back together and I felt generous and went with it," Sam said.

Freddie chuckled. "You're gonna make that the official story whether I agree to it or not, so sure."

"Smart," Sam laughed.

The two stood there in silence again.

"So we're back together again then," Freddie said.

"Yup," Sam said. The two looked at each other. "Well," Sam said. "Lean."

Freddie grinned and leaned down and kissed her.


	246. Chapter 246

_Perception_

"You know, I think I need new boots," Carly said, helping Sam scoop cookie dough onto a tray in the Benson's kitchen.

"Yeah? The other thirty pairs in your closet getting lonely?" Sam asked.

"I do not have thirty other pairs," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "But anyway, you wanna go to the shoe store with me tomorrow?"

"Sure, why not," Sam shrugged. "I have to buy Tyler new football cleats anyway."

"Hey, hey," Gibby said, letting himself into the house.

"What's up, Gib?" Carly smiled. "You seem like you're in a good mood."

"I am," Gibby said. "You remember back in high school when I opened that awesome restaurant in the basement of the school?"

"Gibby's?" Sam said. "Yeah, I remember that. What about it?"

"Well, its always been a dream of mine to rebuild one day," Gibby said. "So that the students of Ridgeway High School could always enjoy delicious food at a slightly-inflated price."

"Okay…" Carly said slowly. "So what's that have to do with you being in a good mood?"

"Well guess who's going to reopen Gibby's in the school?" Gibby asked. "Quincy!"

"Oh my God," Carly said, shaking her head.

"Wait, wait, wait, you really convinced him to restart your restaurant?" Sam frowned.

"Uh-huh, it's gonna be called Quincy's," Gibby said proudly. "He's gonna start the planning today after school so I told him we'd meet him there and help him out."

"Hey, as long as he plans on serving tater tots again, I'm down," Sam said.

"But you guys, this is crazy!" Carly said. "Are we really going to be helping a sixteen-year old boy open a restaurant underneath a school?"

"Wow, so it wasn't enough to crush my dreams, now you're trying to crush my son's dreams?" Gibby said, crossing his arms.

"No! I'm just-"

"Carls, relax, Gibby's restaurant actually did pretty well back when he had it, remember?" Sam said. "And Quincy's ten times smarter than Gibby, so it's bound to be even better this time around."

"Thank you," Gibby said. "See, at least _someone _is supportive of a young man's wishes and dreams."

"I'm gonna go back to these cookies now," Carly said. "And try to block out the rest of this crazy talk."

….

"You're starting a _restaurant_?" Ashton frowned.

"Continuing a restaurant," Quincy corrected her.

Him, Ashton, Emma and Clarissa were sitting at their usual lunch table at Ridgeway High School, where Quincy had just told the girls about his plans.

"Oh yeah, I remember my mom saying something about your dad having some crazy restaurant when they were in high school," Clarissa nodded.

"Yeah, and my mom helped him with it, didn't she?" Emma said.

"Yup," Quincy said.

"But still, don't you think it's a little…weird to have a restaurant in the basement of the school?" Ashton said.

"She's got a point," Clarissa agreed.

"It'll be cool!" Quincy defended.

"Emma," Ashton said. "Can you _please_ convince your boyfriend that he's being insane?"

"I dunno," Emma shrugged. "A restaurant in school that will have decent food…Sounds pretty good to me. And I _do _get free food, right?"

"Of course," Quincy grinned.

"Then forget these downers!" Emma said. "Open that restaurant!"

…

"We need to get new lighting in here," Freddie observed, looking around the basement of Ridgeway High School. "Other than that, this place looks perfect to put a restaurant in again."

"Yeah, and since stupid Mr. Howard isn't here anymore, there shouldn't be any problems this time," Sam said.

"I know!" Gibby said. "Quincy's is going to be the best underground school restaurant ever! I'm welling with fatherly pride!"

"Swelling," Carly corrected him. "And I still say you guys are crazy."

"Well then, no fancy hot lemonade for you," Gibby said.

"When are the kids getting down here?" Freddie asked.

"They should be down here any minute," Sam said, and sure enough, at that second, they heard the door at the top of the basement stairs open, and the four kids walked down.

"Wow, this place is better than I expected," Quincy commented.

"Yeah, I didn't even know we had a basement," Emma said.

"We think that with a little work, you can have this place up and running in a week, Quince," Freddie said.

"Yeah, and we have a bunch of old card tables in our garage you can use," Sam said.

"Whoa, are you guys actually on board with this?" Ashton frowned.

"Shoosh yeah, it's good food!" Sam said.

"Don't worry, _I'm_ on your side," Carly told her.

"Emma and I are going to start making the menus tonight," Quincy said.

"Yeah, I'm really liking a deep-fried theme," Emma said.

"Don't you think that's a little unhealthy?" Clarissa cringed.

"Have you just met me?" Emma frowned.

"You really think we can have this place open by next week?" Quincy asked, looking around.

"Yup, and the legacy of this beautiful place can continue," Gibby said, wiping a tear from his eye. "Shoot, I promised myself I wouldn't cry."

"Yeah, I don't think I wanna see that," Emma said. "I've got to get to soccer practice. I'll be home around seven."

"I'll walk you up," Quincy said.

"So this is really happening?" Ashton asked. "A restaurant is _really _going to be put here?"

"It's actually not as crazy as it sounds," Freddie explained. "See, there's a high demand among students for quality, non-cafeteria food during school hours, and since Quincy will be the only supplier, he's bound to do a good business and-"

"Yo, could you _not _nerdify this?" Sam asked.

"I'm not nerdifying it, Sam! I'm simply explaining the economic reasoning behind-"

"That's nerdifying, baby," Sam said.

"It's educating!"

"Children," Carly said. "Just because we're back at Ridgeway doesn't mean you get to act like high schoolers again."

"He started it," Sam mumbled.

…..

"I'm so nervous," Gibby said, pacing back in forth in front of the couch where Sam and Carly were sitting.

"Dude, stop walking in front of the T.V., I'm trying to watch this shark attack show!" Sam snapped.

"What if the restaurant didn't go well?" Gibby asked.

"Well then you guys will just have to pack up all your restaurant stuff," Carly said. "I mean, it's not like you had any _real _attachment to it."

"It was my dream!" Gibby said.

"When you were seventeen," Carly reminded him.

"Why does she do this?" Gibby asked Sam. "Are Gibson's not allowed to have dreams?"

"I'm not saying-" Carly began.

"Eh, Carly's just bitter because you wouldn't give her that chicken Parmesan for free after we finished up yesterday," Sam said.

"I was starving!" Carly exclaimed.

Just then, the front door to the Benson's house opened up and the four teens walked in.

"How'd it go? Did everyone love my lasagna recipe?" Gibby asked at once. "I had a feeling I may of said to put too much salt in it…Dang it I did!"

"Dad, relax, the restaurant did amazing," Quincy said. "We had to shut down early because we ran out of food."

"Yeah, it was actually pretty successful," Ashton admitted. "Plus, Clarissa and I are going to be the restaurant's new publicity managers."

"Which means we're going to need some new business clothes," Clarissa said.

"You two are the daffadilliest girls on this planet," Emma said.

"You didn't even do anything at the restaurant," Ashton snapped.

"I was the bouncer!" Emma defended. "I kicked five kids out!"

"Aw, just like you did to that Billy Boots kid," Carly smiled at Sam. She turned back to the kids. "Did any of you happen to bring me back some extra chicken Parmesan?"

"No, but I snagged some free onion rings," Emma said, pulling a bag out of her backpack.

"Hey, give me some!" Sam said, grabbing the bag from her daughter.

"Man, this is great," Gibby said. "My restaurant dream lives on!"

"Actually, dad, I wanted to talk to you about that," Quincy said. "See, running the restaurant was fun and everything, but I don't think I really want to make it a permanent thing."

"W-What?" Gibby stammered.

"Yeah, it was an interesting experience, but I think I'm done with it," Quincy said.

"Wait, so Clarissa and I _don't _get to be publicity managers?" Ashton frowned. "Dude! Not cool!"

"Sorry," Quincy said.

"Emma, do something!" Clarissa said.

"You still gonna make me those onion rings when I go over to your place?" Emma asked Quincy.

"Sure," Quincy shrugged.

"Then I'm good," Emma said.

"You are _useless_," Ashton hissed at her twin.

"Well," Gibby said as the four teens headed upstairs. "My heart's broken in twenty places."

"Because your son didn't want to have a basement restaurant?" Carly asked. "Gib, if that's your perception of heartbreak, you've got some intense romance movies you need to watch."

"You know what?" Gibby said, ignoring Carly's comment. "I'm not giving up on this! I'm gonna go quit my job right now so I can put all my effort into opening a _real_ restaurant!"

"Um, Gibby, you may-" Sam started, but Gibby was already out the door.

"I don't know about that guy sometimes," Carly said, shaking her head.

"I know, someone needs to have him on a leash or something," Sam said.


	247. Chapter 247

**AN-I think this is my longest oneshot so far…And for those of you who are fans of How I Met Your Mother, I hope you like this! And for those of you who don't like the show, I hope you like it too!**

…

_Clique_

"So I think that we can get Spencer to lend us parts from his olds lawn mower," Carly said, flipping through her notebook. "And we can use those to build a small working Ferris wheel for our model theme park, sound good, you guys?"

"Sure," Sam said, not looking up from her laptop.

"That sounds…cute," Patrice, who was working with Sam and Carly on this school project, said. "But what if instead of making a Ferris wheel, we make this ride called Tunnel of Forbidden Love, where the riders get to go on a virtual journey of a poor forsaken girl who fell in love with a vampire and a-"

"How about no?" Sam snapped.

"Um, what she means is," Carly said quickly. "Mr. Lumpkin gave pretty specific instructions for this project, and he _did _mention that he'd like us to make a model of a _traditional _theme park, and I just don't think a ride like that is very…traditional."

"Oh, okay," Patrice shrugged. "Then I guess we can do a Ferris wheel."

"Great," Carly said. "Then why don't we meet back here tomorrow to work on it?"

"Cool," Patrice said, getting to her feet. "I'll see you too then. I need to pick up my new designer bag. Later!"

"Why'd we get stuck working with her?" Sam groaned as Patrice left the Shay's apartment.

"Oh come on, she's not that bad," Carly said. "Besides, Mr. Lumpkin's the one that picked our groups, remember?"

"Yeah, yeah," Sam said, heaving herself off the couch. "You have any spaghetti tacos leftover?"

"There should be a few left that you didn't devour last night," Carly said. "Anyway, just try to be nice to Patrice while she's working with us on this project. I don't understand why you don't seem to like her in the first place."

"Because she's one of the prissiest girls in Ridgeway!" Sam pointed out. "And the ditsiest. Plus she's always skipping all over the place with her little clique…It makes me sick."

"What makes you sick?" Freddie asked, letting himself into the apartment.

"Nothing," Sam mumbled.

"We just finished working on our art project with Patrice," Carly explained. "She just left a few minutes ago."

"Oh I know, I saw her down in the lobby when I was coming back from the Groovy Smoothie," Freddie said.

"Did she gush all over you because she still thinks you're a vampire from that video?" Sam scoffed, taking a bite of her spaghetti taco.

"No, actually, her and I had a nice conversation for a little bit down there," Freddie said. "In fact, I've never realized it before, but Patrice is actually pretty cool. I mean, sure, I've always thought she was attractive, but she really seems like a great girl. Which is why I asked her to have dinner with me this Saturday night."

Sam nearly chocked on her spaghetti taco. Even Carly looked rather shocked.

"You mean you asked her out?" Carly frowned.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "We have reservations for Pini's at six."

"Um, I-wow," Carly said. "That's just really…unexpected."

"Yeah," Sam said, finally managing to swallow her food. "Poor Patrice. Not even she deserves something as terrible as a dinner alone with _you_."

"You survived them, didn't you?" Freddie reminded her.

"Barely," Sam mumbled.

"You know, Sam, it _sounds _like you're a little jealous," Freddie said, cocking an eyebrow.

"_Why _would I be jealous?" Sam snapped, slamming her plate down.

"Um, Sam, that's my special plate I got from Portugal," Carly said. "So could you-"

"_You're _clearly the one who has problems," Sam continued, ignoring Carly. "Why the heck would you want to ask out Patrice? You don't even know her!"

"She's lived in this building for years," Freddie pointed out. "She's pretty, nice, and my mom happens to think she'd be a fine girlfriend for me."

"Oh, well in that case, you might as well _marry _her," Sam said.

"Ha, ha," Freddie said dryly. He turned back to Carly. "I actually just came over here to see if Spencer was home; I wanted to borrow a nice jacket for Saturday."

"He's out fishing with Socko's nephew Bass," Carly said. "I'd get you a jacket myself, but last time I went through Spencer's closet, I nearly stepped in puddle of mayonnaise, so I'll let him get it for you when he gets back."

"Okay, cool," Freddie said. "I'll come back tonight then."

"Wow," Carly said as Freddie closed the apartment door behind him. "Freddie and Patrice…Who would've thought?"

"Yeah, I'll call the school paper and tell them to run the headline 'World's Most Awkward Couple'," Sam said.

"Oh come on, they're not awkward," Carly said.  
"How do you know that?" Sam asked. "We've seen the two of them together like, twice! And one time she nearly got him killed by letting that Shadow Hammer guy know where he lives, and the other time she ditched him for Gibby dressed up like a werewolf!"

"Okay yeah, it's sort of awkward," Carly admitted. "But I mean, if Freddie wants to give her a chance, then we'll just have to get used to her."  
Sam scoffed. "Yeah, right."

Carly gave her friend a sympathetic look. "Oh, Sam. I know this might be weird for you, since Freddie and you dated-"

"It's not weird for me," Sam said at once.

"Sam," Carly said knowingly. "You mean to tell me you're not just the tiniest bit jealous?"

"Why would I be jealous?" Sam asked.

"Because," Carly replied. "It's always a little weird, seeing your ex dating someone new."

"Maybe if you still have feelings for them," Sam said, trying to laugh Carly's comment off. "Which I _don't_."

Carly wasn't entirely sure she believed that, but she had enough tact not to challenge Sam. Just yet, that was.

…

"So then I realized that it was the toothpaste that I was feeling in my shoes," Gibby said to Sam and Carly as the girls stood by their lockers at school. "And then I-"

"Gibby, we don't want to hear about your weird feet problems!" Sam snapped.

"Well!" Gibby said indignantly. "What's _her _problem?"

"Eh, she's just a little testy because Freddie asked out that girl Patrice," Carly explained. "You know, the one who was all over you because she thought you were a werewolf?"

"Oh yeah," Gibby said. "Man, she's _hot_."

"No she's not!" Sam said. "She's stupid looking, which works out perfectly, since Freddie's stupid looking too!"

"Then why'd you go out with him?" Gibby asked.

"That's it!" Sam said, reaching for Gibby, but luckily Carly was able to hold her best friend back.

"Sam, you don't need to murder Gibby over this," Carly said.

"Fine," Sam mumbled, still glaring at Gibby.

"Hey, you guys," Freddie said, turning to corner, hand in hand with none other than Patrice.

Sam gave an audible groan and turned to her locker where she pretended to busy herself playing with her microwave.

"Hi," Carly said brightly. "Wow, hand holding? Looks pretty serious."

"Yeah, our date this weekend went great," Freddie said as Patrice giggled. "It looks like we're officially boyfriend and girlfriend now."

"Oh…wow," Carly said. "Well that's so nice!"

"Yeah, it is," Freddie said, staring into Patrice's eyes. "Well, I need to get to class. I'll see you later, Patrice."

"Bye Freddiepie!" Patrice said in a nauseatingly sweet voice. "Text me!"

"So, um, Patrice," Carly said as Freddie hurried off. "You want to help me and Sam finish the project after school?"

"Sure," Patrice nodded. "Can we do it a little later though? Freddie wants to take to the Groovy Smoothie and buy me one of those big expensive love smoothies."

"You know what?" Sam snapped, spinning around and slamming her locker shut. "You-I-You-Nobody likes you, Patrice!" And with that, she stormed off.

"Um…" Carly said to Patrice. "She-She meant nobody liked you in the good way."

"Oh, okay!" Patrice said happily. "I'm gonna go outside now and see if I can get my skin to sparkle with this new lotion I bought!"

"I don't know about that girl," Carly said, shaking her head.

…

After school, Sam headed right back to the Shay's apartment without even waiting for Carly.

"Alright, Puckett," Carly said, walking into her room, spotting Sam laying on her bed, staring up at the ceiling. "What's going on with you? You've been acting upset ever since Freddie and Patrice started going out."

"Why the heck is he even dating her?" Sam snapped. "She's so not his type!"

"What's Freddie's type?" Carly asked, amused.

"Not her!" Sam said.

"Look," Carly said, sitting at the edge of her bed. "We'll talk about this later over some ice cream, okay? But Patrice just texted me and said that she's on her way over, and we really need to work on this project, so just try and put aside your feelings about this whole situation and get through this."

Sam didn't respond.

"I'll call you when she gets here," Carly said, leaving her best friend to have a few moments more peace.

Sam didn't move from her spot on the bed…What _was_ Freddie's type? She honestly didn't even know anymore. Freddie had only two girlfriends (well, three, if you counted Valerie, which she never did); her and Carly, and they were as different as you could get! For a few days, Sam had the wild, crazy thought that maybe, just maybe, Freddie had preferred her over Carly. After all, him and Carly had only dated for a few days; they had lasted a month. Plus, didn't Freddie tell her that he loved her? But then as time went on, Sam realized that those thoughts couldn't possibly true as it seemed that Freddie was beginning to fall for Carly again. And here he was, dating Patrice, who had much more in common with Carly than with her…

Sam frowned as she sat up. As much as she hated to admit it, even to herself, she didn't want Freddie dating Patrice because, well, she didn't want _anyone _dating him. Anyone other than her, that was. She had been wrestling with the resurfacing feelings she was beginning to have for the nub for a few months now, but this, this was the final push she needed. She wanted Freddie back. And she would make sure it happened.

…

"Okay, we're almost done!" Carly said as she glued a clay person onto the sidewalk of the project.

"Thank God," Sam muttered under her breath.

"This project has been so much fun!" Patrice said. "But Sam, maybe if you didn't press the clay so hard between your hands like that, your person would stand a little better."

"Nobody asked you, Patrice!" Sam retorted.

There was a knock at the Shay's door and Freddie let himself in.

"Hey," he greeted the girls. "Wow, this project is really coming along great."

"Thanks, sweetiebunch!" Patrice said, almost causing Sam to gag.

"Hey, my mom's not going to be home tonight," Freddie said to Patrice. "What do you say after this you and I go back there and I cook you a romantic dinner?"

"Oh! That sounds so fun!" Patrice said. "But could we run back downstairs to my apartment before that? I want to feed my hamster first."

"Yeah, sure, whatever you want," Freddie said.

"Um, hey, Frednu-I mean, Freddie," Sam said. "We ordered pizza, and um, we have a slice left. You want it?"

Carly gave Sam a questioning look, but said nothing.

"Sure," Freddie shrugged. "I could go for some pizza."

"Cool, here you go," Sam said, jumping up and grabbing the plate from the counter and handing it to him.

"Wow, it's even seasoned with the perfect amounts of red pepper flakes, garlic powder and Parmesan cheese!" Freddie said, taking a bite.

"Yeah, well," Sam said modestly, shooting a triumphant look towards Patrice.

"Um, Sam?" Carly said, standing up off the floor where she had been working. "Could I talk you over in the kitchen about the, um, socks you borrowed?"

Sam shrugged and followed Carly into the kitchen.

"Alright, Sam, admit it," Carly whispered. "You're trying to steal Freddie back from Patrice!"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Sam said innocently.

"You know," Carly said. "I'm not gonna try and stop you if that's what you're doing."

Sam gave Carly a look. "You're not? I mean, not that I _am_, but-"

"Sam, you know I'd usually try and be happy for Freddie in a situation like this," Carly said, glancing over at the couple in her living room. "But in this case…I'm sorry, there's no way Freddie belongs with Patrice. They are the most horrible couple I've ever seen, and I will _not _have them over here everyday! You do what you need to do to end this!"

Sam smiled. "You know I'm still not admitting anything, right?"

Carly laughed. "Got it."

…

"Wow, this project looks awesome!" Spencer said, looking at the finished project later that evening. Freddie and Patrice had just left, and Sam had retreated upstairs.

"Oh, stop," Carly said modestly.

"So," Spencer said. "That chick Freddie's dating now, she's…"

"I know," Carly said. "I would've never thought he'd be into someone like her, but last week he asked her out, just like that. You think it's some weird guy thing?"

"Could be," Spencer shrugged. "I mean, she's relatively attractive. Guys sometimes fall for that. He didn't seem that into her from what I saw, at least."

"Really?" Carly frowned. "They were all over each other."

"Yeah, but other than that, Freddie seemed sort of distant, didn't you realize?" Spencer asked.

"I don't know, I guess I wasn't paying too much attention to them," Carly said. "They're having dinner over at Freddie's tonight."

"Well, maybe I'm wrong," Spencer shrugged. "But if you ask me, he seemed way more into-"

"Hey, Carls," Sam said, hurrying downstairs. "You know that thing you said to me in the kitchen a few hours ago?"

"About you trying-"

"Well, turns out you were right about that," Sam said quickly.

"Well duh," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "I can sense those things a mile away. Anyway, do you need to talk or-"

"What I need," Sam said. "Is for you to come with me, because we're going to put a stop to…_you know what_."

"Huh?" Carly frowned.  
"Just come on!" Sam said urgently, grabbing Carly's wrist and dragging her towards the door.

"Hey, why am I out of the loop?" Spencer called after the girls.

"Sam, what are we doing?" Carly asked once they reached the hallway.

"We," Sam said, pulling a bobby pin out of her pocket. "Are going to mess up this date."

"What?" Carly exclaimed as Sam began to pick the Benson's lock. "Sam, we can't do that!"

"You told me to do whatever I had to do to break Freddie and Patrice up!" Sam pointed out.

"I know," Carly said. "But I meant, you know, flirt with Freddie and make _him _break up with Patrice."

"I did flirt with him today!" Sam said.

"Sam," Carly said, crossing her arms. "You gave him a slice of pizza."

"Well that's all the flirt I got; I'm not you!" Sam said, successfully unlocking the apartment door. "Now come on! They left to go feed Patrice's hamster five minutes ago, which means we have another five at most to do this!"

"I'm not comfortable with this!" Carly said as she followed Sam into the empty apartment.

"Eh, I'll go skirt shopping with you later to repay you," Sam said simply.

"How do you even plan on ruining this date?" Carly asked, looking around the overly neat home.

"Er…" Sam said. Truthfully, she hadn't given too much thought to this part of the plan.

"I know!" she said. "Maybe if we bring out all of _Galaxy Wars _stuff, Patrice will think he's too big of a nerd for her to date and she'll dump the nub!"

"Lot's of guys like _Galaxy Wars_," Carly pointed out.

"Yeah, but Freddie's got some pretty intense fan stuff," Sam said, heading down the hall to Freddie's bedroom. "Three hundred dollar movie posters, Nug Nug costumes, models of Proton Cruisers he spent weeks making…"

"I still don't feel right about this," Carly said as the girls entered Freddie's room.

"Where is all this stuff," Sam mumbled, ignoring Carly.

"Try the closet," Carly said. "And hurry! What if we get caught! Freddie will be so mad at us…"

"Closet, genius!" Sam said, hurrying over to Freddie's closet. She pulled open the door, only to be met by a full sized poster of Carly.

"Um…" Sam said awkwardly.

"Sam, that doesn't mean anything," Carly said quickly. "I bet that's from years ago; back in eighth grade. Look, this closet looks like Freddie hasn't been in it in years! He probably just never took it down."

"Yeah, probably," Sam said, thought she still felt a pang in her chest. "Okay, let's just get the stuff and-"

But just then they heard the front door of the apartment open, and they heard Freddie and Patrice's voice.

"Quick, hide!" Sam hissed.

"Where?" Carly asked.

"Under the bed," Sam said, diving under Freddie's bed, Carly at her heels.

"Crab!" Carly said. "Sam! We forgot to shut the closet door!"

But it was too late, they could already hear Freddie and Patrice's footsteps.

"I have some candles and a lighter in my room," Freddie said, walking into his bedroom. "I'll set them up on the table for our dinner."

"Oh, how romantic," Patrice smiled. "I love how-Wait a minute…Fredheart? What's this on your closet door?"

"Huh?" Freddie frowned, approaching her, carrying the candles and lighter.

"Why do you have this full sized picture of Carly Shay on your closet wall?" Patrice asked, hurt.

"That-Oh, um, that's-that's nothing," Freddie said quickly. "It's just-"

"And why does it say," Patrice continued, looking at the poster closer. "Carly Shay: One day you will be my bride?"

"I was thirteen when I wrote that!" Freddie said desperately. "It doesn't mean anything now."

"But Freddie," Patrice said sadly. "You still have it up…I'm sorry, but-but if you're still in love with Carly, then I don't think we can be involved."

"But I'm not in love with her!" Freddie said.

"Carls, this is perfect!" Sam whispered from under the bed. "They'll break up over the poster!"

"I still feel dirty," Carly mumbled.  
"Then take a bath!" Sam hissed, still listening intently to the couple bicker.

"I don't know if I can believe that," Patrice said, crossing her arms.

"Patrice, Carly was my crush almost five years ago," Freddie said. "I thought I loved her then, but that was before I ever knew what love was!"

"I still don't know," Patrice said slowly.

"I'll prove I'm over her," Freddie said. He grabbed his trashcan and tore the poster of Carly off his closet door and placed it in. He then lit the lighter and set the poster corner on fire.

Sam's eyes widened, and Carly gave a small cringe.

"You see," Freddie said, stepping closer to Patrice. "I don't love her. It's you I love, Patrice."

"You really mean that?" Patrice asked.

"I do," Freddie nodded.

"Oh, Freddie!" Patrice squealed, throwing her arms around him.

"Come on," Freddie smiled. "Let's go eat our dinner."

Carly and Sam waited a moment before coming out of the hiding spot.

"Well," Carly said as the girls got to their feet. She looked down at the burned remains of her poster. "That was pleasant."

Sam didn't say anything as she also stared down at the picture.

"Sam," Carly said gently, putting a comforting hand on Sam's shoulder. "I-I really don't know what to say-"

"He loves her," she whispered. "He really does…He burned your picture for her…"

Carly didn't reply, but she hugged Sam tightly.

"He said he loved me," Sam said softly.

"He did," Carly said. "And he still does. Right now he's just…he's just-"

"We'd better get out of here," Sam said, nodding towards Freddie's window, which led out to the fire escape. "Before he comes back in here and sees us."

…..

"Where were you and Sam all night?" Spencer asked as Carly let herself back into the apartment later that night.

"We were just…out," Carly said, sighing as she sat down next to her brother. She had just come back from Sam's place, where, no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't make her best friend feel any better.

"Out?" Spencer asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Sam sort of wanted to mess up Patrice and Freddie's date," Carly admitted. "Because, now don't go spilling the beans on this, because she still has feelings for Freddie."

"Really?" Spencer asked, sitting up right. "Tell me more! I love gossip!"

"Well, she was hoping to mess up their date enough for Patrice to dump Freddie," Carly explained.

"Did she?" Spencer asked hopefully. "Because I'd much rather have those two on my sofa then Freddie and Patrice."

"Yeah, so would I," Carly nodded. "But, well…it didn't go so well. Basically, poor Sam had to witness her ex-boyfriend proclaiming his love for another girl tonight."

"What?" Spencer exclaimed, his eyes widening.

"It's a long story," Carly said. "But Sam was a mess afterwards! Sure, she did her whole 'I'm fine, Freddie's a lame nub who I didn't really care about anyway' routine, but she was practically crying when I left her house."

"Aw man," Spencer sighed.

"I'll try talking with her more tomorrow," Carly said. "But I think she just really needed some space tonight."

"Good call," Spencer said.

"You know," Carly said. "I still don't know why the heck Freddie's attracted to Patrice!"

"It's weird chiz," Spencer nodded.

…..

For the next few days, Sam didn't leave her house. She missed school and even iCarly rehearsals.

"Still nothing?" Spencer asked as Carly entered the apartment after coming back from trying to talk to Sam.

"No," Carly said miserably. "I'm starting to get worried; she's really hurt! And the worst part is I can't even yell at Freddie for causing this whole thing because he doesn't know that Sam saw him with Patrice that night and, well, he's not _actually _doing anything wrong."

Spencer nodded. As much as he was concerned about Sam, he couldn't be mad at Freddie for it. Though if Sam didn't come around soon and go back to her usual self, he was sure he could find a way to be.

"I'm gonna go take a bath and then do my homework," Carly said. "Tomorrow I'll hopefully have better luck with her."

"Hopefully," Spencer agreed. He turned back to his television show as Carly retreated upstairs. A few minutes later, though, the front door opened again and Freddie poked his head inside.

"Hey," Freddie said. "You busy?"

"Um, no," Spencer said, turning the television off. "What's up?"

"Well, I have a date with Patrice tonight," Freddie said. "And I sort of wanted to tell you what I'm planning. I just felt like I needed to let _someone_ know, and since Carly's been busy with something lately, I thought I'd come to you."

"Oh, well, okay," Spencer said.

"Well tonight," Freddie said. "I'm gonna set up this whole romantic spot outside on my fire escape and then call her over and take her out there and I'm going to give her this."

He pulled out a jewelry case and opened it up to show a silver heart-shaped necklace.

"Whoa," Spencer said.

"Yeah, it costs half my savings, but it was worth it," Freddie said, closing the case and putting it back in his jacket pocket. "I even got it engraved; it says 'Patrice, my one love' on it."

"I-um-okay," Spencer said. "But don't you think it's a little too soon for that? You've only been dating the girl for two weeks."

"I know, but it's just something about her," Freddie said smiling.

"Oh," Spencer said, trying not to think about how Sam would feel when she saw Patrice wearing that necklace.

"Yeah, and look, I need another favor from you," Freddie said.

"What?" Spencer asked.

"I know that Carly says Sam's been sick with some stomach flu these past few days," Freddie said. "But in case she comes over here tonight…Do you think you could not mention this to her? I know we broke up and all, but I think it would still be a little awkward if she found out, don't you think?"

"Um yeah, awkward," Spencer nodded. "Er, okay, fine, I won't say anything to her."

"Thanks," Freddie grinned. "You're a good friend. Well, I'd better be off; I still have a lot to do for tonight. I want everything to be perfect!"

Spencer groaned as Freddie left him. He just _had _to go and get himself tangled up in all this teenage romance around him, didn't he?

No more than ten minutes had passed when the apartment door opened again, but this time, Sam walked in.

"Hey," she said to Spencer. "Carly here?"

"She's taking a bath," Spencer said. "Are you, um, feeling better?"

"I guess," Sam said. "I've, um, just had a stomach flu these past few days..."

Spencer gave her a look.

"Carly talked, didn't she?" Sam sighed.

"Yeah," Spencer said gently.

"Well…whatever," Sam said. "So what if Freddie's in love with Patrice now? I don't care."

She threw herself down next to Spencer. "What are you watching? I just came over here to drop Carly's jacket off that she left at my place, but my cable just went out, so if anything good's on-"

"Freddie's going to give Patrice a necklace!" Spencer blurted out before he could stop himself.

"W-What?" Sam frowned.

Spencer sighed. He knew Sam being Sam, she would find out about this eventually. He might as well be the one to tell her and try to make sure she got hurt as least as possible. "He-He's going to take her out to his fire escape tonight and give her this really expensive necklace."

"The fire escape?" Sam said weakly. Did he really have to bring her there of all places?

"Yeah," Spencer said softly.

Sam looked down at her feet. "Oh…well, that's-that's…something. But I don't-"

"Yes you do!" Spencer said, jumping up. "Look, Freddie may think he loves Patrice, but that doesn't mean that he _really _loves her! There's still a chance for you two, I know it! I've watched enough soap operas to know that! You two are way better together than Patrice and him are! So go prove it to him! You know where he'll be!"

Sam looked at him. "You really think we could work out?" she asked.

"If Natalie and Eduardo could work out on _Moments of our Days_, then you and Freddie sure as heck can!" Spencer said. "So go! Oh, but um, I wasn't supposed to mention this to you, so if you could not mention it that would be great, thanks. Good luck!"

Sam rolled her eyes as she hurried out of the Shay's apartment across the hall.

"Well," Spencer said to himself. "Either something really good will happen over there and I'll be forever known as the man who found those two true love…or I'm gonna get hurt bad."

…

Sam easily let herself into the Benson's apartment and out onto the fire escape. Her heart flipped when she saw how beautiful Freddie had made it.

White roses had been placed everywhere and sparkling lights had been strung along the balcony. The nub even had romantic music on to finish it off.

Sam had to remind herself that this was done for Patrice, though, and she'd be better off trying to ignore it, as hard as that may be.

She wondered how much longer it would be until Freddie got here with Patrice…whether she was going to make a fool of herself…whether she'd be better off sneaking away now before Freddie arrived…

But then she spotted a laptop sitting on a chair. She wondered why someone as tech-obsessed as Freddie would risk leaving a laptop outside like this where it could get stolen or rained on.

_Probably some lame slideshow of him and Patrice_, Sam thought miserably to herself.

And then, unable to hold back any longer, tears began to stream down her face. Freddie had never done anything like that for her…He had never gotten her any necklaces or set up anything like this for _her_. Heck, he had burned his poster of Carly for her! He did that for her as a way of telling her that he didn't love Carly anymore, but he had never done anything like that for her! (Although, she would've never asked him to do that; Carly was her best friend, after all, but _something _to show her that that chapter in his life had truly closed would've been nice).

That was the final straw. She was going to leave. She didn't want to be here. He clearly loved Patrice more than he ever loved her, considering everything he had done for her…

But just as she was about to climb back through the window off the fire escape, curiosity got the better of her, and she went back over to the laptop.

She yanked it open, anxious to see just what else Freddie had done for his _precious _Patrice.

The second she opened the laptop, a slideshow began, but Sam gasped as she saw the title flash onto the screen. It read _'Sam'_.

_Sam_, she read as the next slide came up. _You are standing out here on this fire escape because finally, for the first time in months, something has worked out for me. _

Confused, Sam read the next slide.

_Patrice is not the one who I want out here; the place where we shared our first kiss to 'just get it over with'. It's you._

Sam didn't know if she could be reading this right, yet she felt heart flutter as the next slide appeared.

_I'm sorry about these past two weeks. But I wanted this to be perfect. I've never put so much thought into anything in my life. I spent months working on this, so now, after a very, very long wait, I present to you __**The Highly Thought Out, Over-The-Top Plan to Get Back Your Ex-Girlfriend Back After You Were Stupid Enough to Let Her Go in the First Place**__._

Sam shook her head. Could this really be happening?

_Step 1_, she read. _Find the girl who would annoy you the most and convince her to help you out and, if necessary, promise to set her up with werewolf Gibby again. _

The next slide slid across the screen.

_Step 2. Hack into teacher's computer and assign you, Patrice and Carly to work together on a school project so that I can 'conveniently' run into Patrice to ask her out. _

_Step 3. Announce to you that me and Patrice are officially going steady. If I'm lucky enough for you to still have feelings for me, hopefully by this point they will resurface. _

_Step 4. Continue to rub Patrice in your face. Then, just when it looks like you can't handle it anymore, announce that me and Patrice will be having a date at my place._

_Step 5. Knowing you, you will use your devious mind to trash my relationship by sneaking into my apartment before we get there, so have myself and Patrice hide in my living room until we hear you come in. _

_Step 6. Have Patrice find my old posters of Carly, where she will pretend to get mad at me for it and claim that it means I still have feelings for her. I will then burn the poster. This part is not just an act. I really am over Carly. I know that was always an issue for you when we were first dating, and if I am going to do this right this time, I don't want there to be any question to it._

_Step 7. Lay low for a few days before talking to Spencer about my super romantic plan to bring Patrice out onto 'our' fire escape and tell him not to tell you. If he does tell you, and if you are reading this, that means that he did, it means that he has given me his blessing as your closest father figure. _

_Step 8…Turn around. _

Sam spun around and was shocked to see Freddie standing behind her, holding a bouquet of roses.

"You-" she said weakly. "This-What?"

Freddie smiled, and then, feeling confident, walked over to her and kissed her deeply.

Sam readily responded, realizing that it had been far to long since she felt his soft, warm lips…But then, still _very _confused, she pulled away.

"What-What is all this?" she asked breathlessly. "What-Was-You _planned _all of this?"

Freddie nodded.

"Everything?" Sam asked. "You never-You never really went out with Patrice? You never really loved her?"

"No, of course not," Freddie said. "I did it all in the crazy hope that I could win you back, Sam."

Sam blinked. "Wait, let me get this straight…For these past two weeks you've been playing me, going through this insane plan of yours, to get back together with me?"  
Freddie nodded again.

"I see," Sam said. And with that she hit Freddie's arm. Hard.

He grimaced but didn't retort.

"You-You-You _nub_!" exclaimed. "Do you have _any idea-_" she hit him again. "Just how _angry_-" she hit him once more, causing him to wince. "You've made me? Do you know what these past two weeks were _like_? I should push you _off _this fire escape to teach you about playing me like that! In fact, I _would _push you off, if…if…"

"If what?" Freddie asked, grinning.

"If," Sam sighed, putting her fists down. "It wasn't so worth it."

Freddie handed her the bouquet of roses. "You have every right to be mad with me-"

"Shoosh yeah I do," Sam said, though she felt some of her anger leaving her as she held the roses.

"But I-I-You have no idea how long I've wanted to do this, Sam," he said. "Ask you to get back together with me."

"Well then why didn't you ask?" Sam asked.

"Because," Freddie said, chuckling a little. "You're a special girl, Sam. I didn't want to ask you to get back together in some boring, non-memorable way."

"So you opted for the crazy, complex way then?" Sam asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Pretty much," Freddie nodded. "And it worked…didn't it?"

Sam couldn't help but smile at him. "Yeah, lucky for you it did."

"_Very_ lucky for me," Freddie said, leaning towards her again.

"Whoa," Carly said suddenly, hopping off the window ledge onto the fire escape, looking shocked at what she appeared to just interrupt. "What's going on here…"

"Basically, this nub has spent the past two weeks playing everyone," Sam said.

"Huh?" Carly frowned.

"It was all an act," Sam said, grinning from ear to ear. "All of it. Patrice, his being in love with her…He planned everything just to drive me crazy enough to come over here so he could ask me-"

"-If she would get back together with me," Freddie smiled. "And she said yes."

"Oh my God!" Carly exclaimed. "That's incredible! But wait, I'm still a little confused. So everything that's been going on these past two weeks-"

"Was all part of the plan," Freddie nodded. "Sorry about burning your picture, by the way. I didn't mean it in a personal way."

"Yeah, I know," Carly said, looking on at her two best friends happily. "Well…I'll leave you two lovers alone. But Sam? My place when you're done, okay?"

"Got it," Sam nodded. "And um, Carls? Is that my butter sock you have there?"

"Oh, yeah," Carly said, looking down at the sock full of butter in her hand. "See, Spencer let it slip to me that Freddie was going to give Patrice this special little necklace out here, and I was going to meet Freddie out here and knock some sense into him."

"Really?" Freddie asked. "You would do that?"

"Hey, Sam was really upset!" Carly said.

"Thanks, Carls," Sam laughed. "Means a lot…even though you probably wouldn't be nearly as effective with that thing as I could be."

"Actually, I already gave myself a bruise with this thing when it swung into my arm when I was climbing out here," Carly said.

"Oh, and speaking of that necklace," Freddie said, reaching into his pocket. He pulled out the jewelry case he had shown Spencer earlier and opened it up and carefully hooked the necklace around Sam's neck.

"It's…" Sam said softly. "It's beautiful."

"Read the back," Freddie said.

Sam flipped over the necklace and read the engraving. _Sam: my one love_.

"Really?" Sam asked, looking up at Freddie.

"Really," Freddie said, leaning down to kiss her again.


	248. Chapter 248

_Ruin_

"See, _this _is why you wear knee pads," Sam said, helping her twelve-year old son Tyler onto the counter.

"I forgot," Tyler mumbled, trying to hold back his tears as he looked at his badly scratched knee.

"Just remember for next time, okay?" Sam said, kissing the top of his head as she got down the large first aid kit Marissa had bought for the family for Christmas.

Tyler nodded as Sam pulled out a can of antibacterial spray and a bandage.

"It's gonna hurt a little," Sam said.

"Ow!" Tyler said indignantly.

"There," Sam said quickly, putting the bandage on his wound. "Good as new. Now if you're go back out skateboarding _wear kneepads_. Otherwise you're gonna be the one sitting through your dad's safety slide show."

Tyler jumped off the counter and headed back outside. Sam grabbed a bag of pork rinds from one of the kitchen cupboards and headed to the couch.

"Alright," she said happily, flopping down onto the sofa. "Now for a little cage fighting…"

At that moment, though, the front door opened and Emma walked in.

"Hey, Em, I've got a new bag of pork rinds and a good fight starting a few minutes," Sam said. "Wanna watch with me?"

"No, I have homework," Emma mumbled, hurrying past her mother upstairs.

"Homework?" Sam frowned, staring up after her daughter. "Since when does that kid do homework?"

The front door opened again and Ashton walked in.

"Hey, Ashton, what's wrong with Emma?" Sam asked, turning off the T.V.

"Um, well," Ashton said slowly, sitting down next to Sam. "I'm not really sure…all I know is that her and Quincy had a fight."

"A fight?" Sam repeated.

"Yeah, and I think it was really bad, because Quincy didn't even ride home with all of us in Clarissa's car," Ashton said. "And Emma didn't say a word on the way home. I tried to talk to her, but I got nothing."

"Poor kid," Sam said.

"Yeah, I know," Ashton said. "I don't usually feel bad for her, but this time…"

"I'll talk to her," Sam said.

"Okay," Ashton said. "I would try again too, but Clarissa's waiting outside in the driveway for me so she can drive us to our student government meeting."

"Don't worry, go have fun," Sam told her.

Once Ashton left, Sam got to her feet and headed up to the twins room. She knocked at the door, and when she didn't hear a reply, she let herself in.

Emma way laying on her bed, her headphones in, tossing her soccer ball up into the air.

"Hey, Emma," Sam said. "I thought you were doing homework."

"I will later," Emma mumbled, pulling her headphones out.

"You feeling okay?" Sam asked.

"I'm fine," Emma replied lamely.

"I talked to Ashton downstairs…" Sam said slowly. "And she said something about you and Quincy having a fight?"

"Ashton needs to learn to mind her own business," Emma snapped.

"Em, she was just worried about you," Sam said.

Emma shrugged.

"So…" Sam said cautiously. "_Did _you and Quincy have a fight?"

"Yeah," Emma whispered.

Sam sat down on the corner of Emma's bed. "You wanna talk about it?"

"I was at the vending machines, getting myself a candy bar," Emma said shakily. "And it got stuck, so I hit the machine a few times to get it out, but then this one nerdy dude came over and told me I was 'damaging' school property. I told him to shut his mouth before I shut it for him, but he kept going on and on, so I sort of…maybe, pushed him a little to teach him a lesson. But then Quincy came and well, it turns out that nerdy guy I pushed was the president of the school's gardening club, and he told Quincy since his girlfriend 'assaulted' him, he was going to kick Quincy out of the club. So then Quincy got mad at me for beating up his president, and I got mad at him not taking my side in the whole thing. And we just sort of yelled a lot…but it wasn't like how we usually yell at each other…"

"Aw, Emma," Sam said, putting her arm around her daughter.

"I don't even know if we broke up or what," Emma said, wiping her eyes. "But I think he's really mad at me, mom."

"Well, maybe once he's had time to cool off," Sam suggested.

"But I always do this," Emma mumbled.

"Do what?" Sam asked.

"Ruin everything!" Emma exclaimed. "I got him kicked out of gardening club, I always get him detentions, I broke his locker by sticking gum in the lock…I'm a terrible girlfriend."

"No you're not," Sam said.

"Yes I am," Emma said. "Ashton's a way better girlfriend than I am. She never gets any of the guys she dates thrown out of anything."

"But you're _different _than Ashton," Sam said.

"Yeah, but I'd bet Quincy would be happier with a girlfriend like her," Emma said glumly.

Sam shook her head. "Not a chance; everyone, your dad and I, Carly, Quincy's parents, we all agree that Quincy's always the happiest when he's around you!"

Emma still didn't seem convinced.

"Come on, you know how many things I've ruined for your dad?" Sam said. "Let's see…I got him kicked out his train club, sabotaged his application to NERD camp, although that was before we were dating. Even now! Remember last week when him and I went to dinner with your grandma and I made him mad when I 'accidently' spilled my fettuccini Alfredo on her? Plus that nub bugs me all the time. But you know we're still _very _happy together."

"So what do I do about Quincy then?" Emma asked.

"Well, what do _you _want to do?" Sam asked.

"I want to make up," Emma said softly. "But I suck at that! I don't know how to do that!"

"You just need to talk to him," Sam said.

"Talk to him?" Emma repeated.

"Yeah, I know, it's the worst," Sam said, patting Emma on the shoulder. "But apparently in relationships you've got to do it occasionally. Just tell him that you're sorry that you got him kicked out of the gardening club and see where that takes you."

Emma nodded. "I guess I could try that…"

"It's actually not as bad as you'd think," Sam smiled. "Trust me."

…..

"Hey," Emma said quietly, opening the door to Quincy's bedroom later that day.

"Hey," Quincy replied, looking up from his textbook at his desk. "I was actually just about to call you."

"Yeah, well, I was in the neighborhood," Emma said. "Um, I got you a smoothie." She handed him a cup. "It's that weird cucumber citrus thing you like."

"Thanks," Quincy smiled.

The two were silent for a moment.

"Em, listen," Quincy said just as Emma opened her mouth to begin the apology she had been rehearsing for hours. "I'm sorry about today. That guy was being a jerk, and I should've stuck up for you instead of worrying about my stupid gardening club. You're my girlfriend and I know that you can be sort of…aggressive sometimes. I actually just emailed that guy and told him that him and his stupid gardening club can go without me."

"Oh," Emma said, caught a little off guard. "Well then…cool."

She stood there for a moment before she let out a deep breath. "Look…Quincy. I'm sorry too. This whole thing was sort of my fault…I didn't mean to get you kicked out that gardening club, no matter how lame I think it is."

Quincy rose an eyebrow. "Is Emma Benson _apologizing _to me?"

"I'll deny it if you tell anyone," Emma said, smiling. "But yeah, I am."

Quincy grinned as he stood up to kiss her.

"While we're at this," Emma said. "I might as well apologize for hot gluing your math book shut too. And using your cell phone to prank call Ms. Webb. And selling your bike on the Internet."

"That was you?" Quincy frowned. "I thought that was my dad…Wait a minute, so are you like, gonna start apologizing for _everything _now?"

"Uh no," Emma said, putting her arms around his neck. "But how about this? I apologize every few years for everything? You know, so I can keep starting fresh?"

Quincy laughed. "I guess that could work…"


	249. Chapter 249

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 227, where Sam and Freddie find out that Emma and Quincy are dating. **

…

_Leap_

"I still can't believe it," Freddie said as he slid underneath the covers of his and Sam's bed. "Our little Emma…dating Quincy Gibson."

"Yeah, I know," Sam nodded, sliding into bed next to her husband. "It's a little…weird. I mean, if someone had told you way back twenty years ago that our daughter would be dating Gibby's son, you'd be a little freaked out, wouldn't you?"

"I think I'd be a little more freaked out about finding out you and I had a daughter together in the first place," Freddie pointed out.

"Okay, true," Sam agreed. "But it's still weird. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm glad Emma seems happy with him, but still; Quincy?"

"It's no weirder than us," Freddie said.

"Dude, you're being a little too calm about this," Sam frowned. "You freak out when guys even _look _at one of the girls."

"I know, and I'll never be thrilled about the fact that those two _have _to date," Freddie said. "I still like to think that maybe one day they'll surprise me and announce that they're going to become nuns or something so I can stop worrying about all their stupid boyfriends. But if Emma's going to insist on dating, I'd much rather her be dating Quincy, my best friend's son who I've known since he was born, than some random dude off the street."

"I guess," Sam sighed. "But still…Gibby's son? I'm telling you this now, Fredlump, if those two get married and have kids, we're gonna make sure we're the favorite grandparents, got it?"

"Got it," Freddie chuckled.

"Man," Sam said, leaning back on her pillow. "You know, I wonder how long those two would've kept this whole thing hidden if we hadn't caught them at the restaurant tonight?"

"Who knows," Freddie said. "When'd they say they first got together again?"

"During that blackout last month," Sam replied. "When they were locked in our basement together when they were getting flashlights and-Holy chiz! Dude!" she grabbed Freddie's arm.

"Ow! What?" Freddie winced.

"I think I totally walked in on them that night!" Sam said.

"Really?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah, remember how long they were down there?" Sam nodded. "Didn't you think it was weird that they didn't yell for help or call us on their cells? And when I went down there they seemed sort of…friendly."

"Oh man…I never thought about that," Freddie said. "How long were they alone down there? They better not have done anything more down there then a-a kiss on the cheek!"

"That's the overprotective nub I know," Sam smiled.

"Dang it, I thought I was actually going to be okay with her dating," Freddie said.

"Eh, you'll never be okay with it," Sam said. "But hey, like you said, better Quincy than some stubrag like that Chase kid she used to date."

"Yeah," Freddie sighed. "I mean, I guess I still like to think of her and Ashton as my little girls who said that they'd never get married because they never wanted to leave me. Sure, I knew at some point I'd have to let them go, but they just both grew up so fast. This dating thing is a big leap for them and me, and as much as I'd like to keep them locked up away from boys, I'm just going to have to-"

He was interrupted by a snore, and he looked down at Sam to see that she was fast asleep.

"Of course," he said, rolling his eyes.


	250. Chapter 250

**AN-Hey, sorry these oneshots have all been future oriented lately. It's just I do the requests in the order I get them, and I had a whole bunch of future ones in a row. **

…**..**

_Tie_

"You almost ready to go, Sam?" Freddie called upstairs to his wife as he finished tying his tie.

"Yeah!" Sam yelled back down to him.

"Hey," Carly smiled as she walked into the Benson's house. "Wow, you look all fancy. You and Sam going out?"

"Yeah, sort of," Freddie nodded. "We're actually going to meet Gibby and Tasha and Emma and Quincy for dinner at that new French place that just opened up by the car dealership."  
"Oh, sounds fun," Carly said. "Any reason why?"

"Well you know, since Emma and Quincy are getting married in a few months, we figured it would be nice to have a little family dinner," Freddie told her.

"Yeah," Sam said coming down stairs wearing a nice dress and heels. "Plus we convinced Gibby to pay, which means I'm ordering three of everything."

"Sam," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Hey, we're paying for the wedding!" Sam said. "I think those two can afford to feed me for one night."

"I thought you guys were splitting the cost of the wedding," Carly pointed out.

"We are," Freddie said.

"Well…Tasha's a supermodel," Sam said. "They've got plenty of money anyway."

"True," Carly grinned.

"We need to get going," Freddie said, pulling on his jacket. "The reservations are in twenty minutes, you know."

"Okay, okay, let's go," Sam said. "God forbid we're two minutes late."

"Have fun," Carly laughed.

…

"Where are they?" Freddie asked, looking at his watch. "They're ten minutes late!"

"Relax, they're probably out in the parking lot now, making out or something," Gibby said, not looking up from his menu.

"Gibby!" Freddie exclaimed. "Must you?"

"Must I what?" Gibby asked, looking confused.

"Look, there they are now," Tasha said.

"Hey, sorry we're late," Quincy said as him and Emma took their seats at the table.

"Yeah, we had…car trouble," Emma said.

"Sure, that's why your lipsticks smeared," Sam said under her breath, causing Emma to blush.

"So, this is fun," Freddie said, clearly wanting to change the subject. "Our two families out for a delicious dinner. And in just a couple months, we'll be one big family!"

"Yeah, we'll practically be cousins!" Gibby said, grinning at Sam and Freddie.

"No we won't," Sam said.

"Um, anyway," Quincy said. "Emma and I finally managed to finish picking out the menu for the wedding reception."

"There's five different types of meat," Emma said.

"Nice," Sam said, high-fiving her daughter.

"What about your dress, Emma?" Tasha asked.

"What about it?" Emma asked.

"Did you pick one out yet?"

"Um…no, not yet," Emma said.

"I thought you guys all went shopping for one on Friday," Freddie said.

"We did," Sam said. "And Ashton and Clarissa both found their future wedding dresses, but Emma couldn't find the right one, so we're gonna go again next weekend."

"You should go to Phillip's Bridal Rental," Gibby said. "That's where I always got my dresses for iCarly."

The rest of the table stared at him.

"What? They're cheap!" Gibby defended.

Once the party had placed its orders, Sam and Emma began discussing the latest statistics on their favorite fighter and Tasha began fussing over Quincy's new haircut.

"I hope the chicken at this place is good," Gibby said.

"Uh-huh," Freddie said, staring at his daughter and her fiancé across the table. "Dude, your son hasn't stopped playing footsies with Emma since they got here, you know."

"So?" Gibby frowned. "Do _you _want to play footsies? Because I don't usually do that, but if you really want to-"

"No!" Freddie snapped. "I was just-Never mind."

"So, Emma, Quincy," Sam said. "Did you two ever find an apartment for after your wedding yet? I mean, the one you two have now's a little small, isn't it?"

"Yeah, we did actually find one," Quincy said. "The problem is, we won't be able to movie into it until about three weeks after the wedding, and we're supposed to be moving out of our old one the day after the wedding."

"Hey, that's no big deal," Freddie said. "You guys can stay at our place in Emma and Ashton's old room."

"Hey!" Gibby said indignantly. "What if I wanted them to live at my place?"

"Well, our place is closer to Emma's job _and _Quincy's job," Freddie pointed out. "If they stayed at your place, they'd have an extra ten minutes to drive each day."

"But your place doesn't have a hot tub, now does it?" Gibby retorted.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, if Emma and Quincy are staying with anyone, it's us," Sam said.

"Thank you, Sam," Freddie said.

"I just don't want to lose an argument to Gibby," Sam whispered to him.

"But out house has the perfect guest room we can set up for them," Tasha said.

"We have faster Wi-Fi then you!" Freddie argued.

"I'll give them both free backrubs everyday!" Gibby said.

"Um, should we tell them that Ashton and Clarissa already said we could take the third bedroom in their new apartment?" Quincy whispered to Emma.

"Nah," Emma said, happily watching the scene as she grabbed a breadstick. "This is sort of funny."


	251. Chapter 251

_Fountain _

"I don't know why you're mad at _me_, Sam," Freddie snapped as him and Sam stormed back into their house. "_You're _the one who _I_ should be mad at; and I am!"

"Um, hey," Carly said, looking up from her PearPad.

"What do you mean you don't know why I'm mad at you?" Sam yelled, throwing her jacket onto the ground forcefully. "You were a complete jerk!"

"Because you were being obnoxious!" Freddie retorted.

"Um, guys," Carly said again. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah," Sam said, still glaring at her husband. "Everything's just fine, Carly."

"Are the kids asleep?" Freddie asked, still frowning at Sam.

"Yeah, they all went down a few hours ago," Carly said, quickly grabbing her bag, sensing that the couple probably wanted the house to themselves right now. "Well, um, I'm just gonna go now…I'll see you tomorrow."

Once Carly had left, Sam opened her mouth again. "This whole thing was your fault in the first place."

"My fault?" Freddie exclaimed. "_How _was any of this my fault?"

"You had to go make a big deal over nothing!" Sam said loudly. "Like you always do!"

"You were about to get into a _physical fight _with my boss's wife!" Freddie said. "I think that's a pretty big deal! You realize that I could lose my job over this? Because you couldn't just behave for _one night_? What do you think we're going to do if my boss fires me over this, huh? Your income can only keep us afloat for so long on its own; we have _four kids_ and a _mortgage _to worry about!"

"Well then why'd you have to drag me to your stupid work function tonight in the first place?" Sam snapped. "How many times did I tell you I _didn't want to go_? But noooo! You just had to drag me anyway!"

"Well _sorry _for thinking that maybe, just maybe, it'd be nice to have my wife _supporting _me for one night!" Freddie said. "I thought it would be worse for me to just show up by myself when every other guy there would have his wife, but _clearly _I would've been better off doing that!"

"You see! You didn't want me there to _support _you!" Sam said. "You just wanted me there so you could be just like the rest of your little work friends!"

"Regardless, you shouldn't have tried to push my boss's wife into a fountain!" Freddie yelled. "You're a grown adult, Sam! You'd _think _you'd know how to behave in public by now!"

"Well you'd _think _that after almost ten years of marriage, you'd actually know that I'd rather chew my own foot off then spend the evening at some overly-fancy work party where the most interesting thing that happens the entire night is when the power went out for two minutes!"

"I-I can't even believe you," Freddie said, shaking his head in disbelief. "You are being completely unreasonable right now!"

"Yeah, _I'm _unreasonable," Sam scoffed.

Freddie sighed, too angry to even argue back. "Look," he finally managed to say. "It's late. I don't want to wake the kids up."

"Fine," Sam said simply. "I'm going to bed."

"Fine," Freddie said. "I guess…I guess I'll sleep down here."

"Yeah, smart move," Sam said coldly.

She climbed upstairs without a goodnight to Freddie. When she got to the couple's bedroom she collapsed onto the bed. After a few moments of laying there, though, trying to get to sleep, she realized that something didn't feel right. Even though she was beyond exhausted, she just couldn't seem to fall asleep. It wasn't until a few minutes later, however, did she realize that her sudden insomnia could be because the bed suddenly felt two times bigger; for this was the first time since her and Freddie had gotten married that they were not falling asleep next to each other.

…

The next morning, Sam was in the kitchen, fixing the kids breakfast.

"Mommy?" five-year old Emma asked, taking a bite of her toast. "How come daddy was sleeping on the couch this morning?"

"Um, because he fell asleep watching T.V. down here last night," Sam said swiftly.

"Can we sleep in front of the T.V. tonight?" Jason asked through his mouth filled with eggs.

"No," Sam said firmly.

"Morning daddy!" Ashton said brightly as her father walked into the kitchen, looking a bit tired, no doubt from trying to sleep on the hard sofa.

"Morning, sweetie," Freddie yawned, grabbing a piece of bread and popping it into the toaster.

Sam and Freddie didn't exchange their usual good morning kiss, but instead chose simply to pretend the other wasn't there.

"You kids ready to go to school?" Freddie asked as he poured himself a large cup of coffee in his to-go thermos.

"Yeah, my class is learning about dinosaurs!" Jason said excitedly.

"Have fun then," Sam said, smiling at her son.

"Bye mommy," the girls said as they jumped down from their seats at the table.

"Bye girls," Sam said as the kids ran out to Freddie's car.

Freddie stood in the kitchen for a moment. "Bye," he finally mumbled.

"Bye," Sam mumbled back.

Once Freddie and the kids left, Sam quickly threw the dishes into the dishwasher and grabbed Tyler from his high chair so she could drop him off at Spencer's before driving off to her own job.

….

"Hey," Carly smiled as Sam sat down with Carly at a cafeteria at the television studio where the two worked. "You feeling okay?"

"Sure, why?" Sam mumbled.

"Well it just seemed like you and Freddie were a little upset last night," Carly said. "Did you two have a fight or something?"

"Yeah," Sam sighed.

"You wanna talk about it?" Carly asked gently.

"Not really," Sam muttered. "But Carly…I think this was the biggest fight we've ever had. I know we can barely go a week without arguing about _something_, but this wasn't an argument. This was full-out screaming and yelling. We've never done that before. Ever."

"Oh, Sam," Carly said. "This is really bothering you, isn't it?"

Sam nodded.

"Well, clearly if it's bothering you this much," Carly said. "You want to make up with him."

Sam shrugged. "Or I could wait until he comes to me to make up…"

"Sam," Carly said firmly. "Which is more important to you? Your pride? Or Freddie?"

Sam sipped her water.

"Sam?" Carly said.

"You think I have time to run down to his office before our lunch hour is up?" Sam asked quietly.

"I'll cover for you," Carly smiled. "Don't worry about it."

Sam headed outside to the parking lot. She was just about get into her car when she heard a voice behind her.

"Sam?"

She spun around and was surprised to see Freddie getting out of his own car that was parked a few spots down from her.

"Hey," she said as he walked over to her. "What-What are you doing here?"

"Um, well, I had some time during my lunch break…" Freddie said. "And I was, you know, in the neighborhood."

"Oh," Sam nodded. "So, um, did-did you talk to your boss today?"

"Oh, yeah," Freddie said. "And he basically said that I was too valuable to the Pear Company for him to even consider getting rid of me over something like what happened last night. But, um, I don't think he'll be throwing anymore work functions at places with giant fountains."

"Oh…good," Sam nodded.

The two were silent for a moment.

"Listen, Sam I'm sorry," Freddie blurted out. "I didn't mean to yell at you like that. I know how much you hate going to those stupid work things of mine, and I shouldn't have dragged you along there just so I wouldn't be the only guy there without his wife."

Sam smiled. "I'm sorry too, baby. I probably shouldn't have tried to push your boss's wife into the fountain. I knew that it was an important night for you and I should've just kept myself busy at the buffet. I probably would've gotten mad at me too."

"Yeah, but I still shouldn't have called you obnoxious and said you never supported me," Freddie said. "You're not obnoxious. And you're a great wife. Plus there was obviously a reason you were fighting with that woman. What were you two arguing about anyway?"

"She might've said something about your PearPad Apps being overrated," Sam said. "So I told her that she'd better shut her face before I pushed her into that fountain with her precious little pearls on and everything."

"Aw, you were defending me?" Freddie grinned.

"Someone's got to," Sam said.

Freddie chuckled as he pulled Sam closer to him and leaned down and kissed her.

"I love you," he whispered as they pulled away.

"I love you too," said softly.


	252. Chapter 252

_Clash_

"Aren't you excited?" Carly said as she tried to run a brush through Sam's hair for the third time that morning.

"Sure," Sam said, swatting Carly's hand away as she applied lipstick onto her lips.

"Oh come on, it's like you're getting married again; get pumped!" Carly grinned.

"We're renewing our vows," Sam said. "It's not _that _big of a deal."

"It's a huge deal!" Carly said. "You two have been married for ten years; I think this is the perfect way to celebrate your anniversary."

"What's an anniversary mommy?" Ashton asked as her and Emma ran into Sam and Freddie's bedroom, where Sam was getting ready.

"It's a day when something special happened," Sam explained.

"Yeah, today's the day your mommy and daddy got married," Carly said.

"Was I there?" Emma asked.

"No, you weren't even thought of yet, kiddo," Sam chuckled. "Why don't you and Ashton go downstairs and see if daddy's ready yet?"

"Are you sure I can't fix your hair one more time?" Carly begged Sam as the twins ran out of the room.

"No, Carls, I'm done getting ready," Sam said. "I've already redone my makeup twice and changed my nail polish to a _slightly _lighter shade because you claimed the first coat clashed with my dress!"

"Okay, okay," Carly conceded. "You _do _look nice though, Sam."

"Thanks," Sam smiled.

"This is gonna be such a great day," Carly continued. "Although if you would've let me invite more people-"

"Ick, no," Sam cringed. "I'm perfectly fine with our little group. They're _more _than enough. I promise you, if you ever want to renew your vows, you can go all out."

"Cool," Carly said. "And hey, while we're up here, can I-"

"No!"

"Why not?" Carly moaned.

"Because!"

"I just want to hear your new vows you wrote Freddie," Carly pouted. "Is that too much to ask?"

"You'll hear them downstairs," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Fine," Carly sighed. She looked at her Pearphone. "Whoa. Speaking of downstairs, we need to get down there. This thing is supposed to start in two minutes!"

…..

"Alright, so two remember what you're gonna do, right?" Carly asked Freddie and Sam as they sat in their kitchen with their guests all gathered in the living room.

"Yes, Carly," Freddie said.

"So you're going to walk out there into the living room," Carly began, clearly not hearing Carly. "And walk down to the minister who's gonna say some stuff and then you two will say your new vows to each other and then you kiss."

"And then we get cake, right?" Sam asked.

"Yes, Sam, then you get cake," Carly said.

"Just checking," Sam said.

"Okay, I'm gonna go get my seat," Carly said. "Good luck, you two!"

"So," Freddie said as Carly hurried out of the kitchen. "I can't wait to hear the vows you wrote…"

"Oh, was I supposed to write those?" Sam teased him. "I thought I could just group together a bunch of lines from those cheesy cards they sell down at the gas station and call it a day."

"Ha, ha," Freddie said.

"Well are your vows going to live up to the ones you read at our wedding, Benson?" Sam asked.

"You'll see," Freddie smiled. He leaned down to give Sam a kiss. "You know you look beautiful…like you have every day for the past ten years…and all those years I knew you before."

"Oh God, are your vows going to be as cheesy as that line?" Sam asked.

"Maybe."

Just then the two heard the music begin in the living room.

"Well, here we go," Freddie said, smiling at Sam as he held out his arm for her.

"Let's do this baby," Sam grinned as she linked arms with him.

The couple stepped out into the living room. Jason, Emma and Ashton were sitting in the front row next to Marissa, who had one-year old Tyler on her lap. Sam's mom was there as well, along with Melanie and her family, Gibby and his wife, Tasha, and their kids, Spencer and his family, T-Bo (who looked like he was crying), and of course, Carly and her family.

"Hi mommy! Hi daddy!" Emma yelled loudly as her parents passed them. They both couldn't help but chuckle at their daughter.

They reached the minister, who then began his speech.

"We are gathered here today," he started. "To celebrate ten beautiful years of marriage. It is rare for love to show so strongly in two people, but Fredward and Samantha Benson have certainly proven to us all just how powerful love can be. Ten years ago these two embarked on an adventurous journey. And here they stand now, still enjoying every moment of it. The couple has written new vows to one another to show how their love for the other continues to grow each day. Freddie, if you'll go first."

"Okay," Freddie said, looking right into Sam's eyes. "Sam, every morning I wake up to you, I think to myself how lucky I am that the first think I get to see every morning is the most beautiful, perfect woman in the world. And every night, before we go to sleep, I think to myself how lucky I am that the last thing I get to see each night is the most beautiful, perfect woman in the world. Never has a day gone by where you haven't made my whole life worth living. And now here we are, ten years later, with four amazing kids, a ton of memories and our lives still ahead of us. These past ten years have been unbelievable. And there's nothing I'd rather do more than spend the next ten with you too. And the next ten. And the next ten. And the next ten. And all the tens of years to come. Every day I say this to you, and every day the meaning gets stronger: Sam. I love you."

Everyone awed as Freddie finished his speech.

"Way to make me follow the world's gushiest vows," Sam whispered to him, though smiling from ear to ear.

"And now Sam will read her vows to Freddie," the minister said.

"Alright," Sam said, clearing her throat. "Freddie. On any given day, by noon, if I've even woken up by then, odds are I've called you at least five names, thrown something at you, and have probably stolen some sort of food from you. Any sane person would've left me far before meeting me at the alter ten years ago. So clearly you're not a sane person. You're a nub. But I wouldn't change that for anything in the world because you're my nub. You're the only one who can make me smile when I come home from a bad day of work. You're the one who compliments me every single day, even when I'm wearing ratty old sweatpants and one of your sweaters. And you're the only who I let call Sammy and live to tell the tale. People always say that when you get married, eventually the spark and the romance die away, but you've kept that alive for me. Even after four kids, I still feel the same annoying girlish butterflies in my stomach when you kiss me or hold my hand. And every day, when you say 'I love you', and I roll my eyes at you and tell you to stop being such a sap, I'm really just trying to stop myself from grinning like an idiot. I love you, Freddie. More then you can ever imagine."

"I think you just one-upped me," Freddie whispered, grinning at his wife.

"It's what I do," Sam said.

"And now, without further ado," the minister said. "I now pronounce you still husband and wife. You may kiss the bride…again."

And as the guests began to cheer, Freddie and Sam kissed each other, both hardly believing how fast ten years could really go by.


	253. Chapter 253

_Spike_

"And that's how you teach a dog to give a Gibby back massages," Carly said to Freddie's camera.

"That dog scratched up my back!" Gibby said indignantly.

"Well he can't help it!" Sam snapped. "He's not some fancy dog who can afford to get his nails trimmed every week, are you Spike?" She playfully patted the large lab that the teens had brought in for their iCarly sketch.

"Well, that's all we have for this week's iCarly," Carly said. "So until next week-"

"Keep on shaving your boss's feet," Sam finished for her.

"And we're clear," Freddie said, turning off his camera. "Great show you guys."

"Thank you," Carly smiled as Sam went over to her boyfriend so their couple could exchange their usual post-web show kiss.

"What do we do with this vicious dog now?" Gibby asked, glancing nervously at the dog.

"Spencer's gonna bring him back to Socko's cousin in a little bit," Carly explained.

"The one who owns the pet shop?" Gibby asked.

"Yeah, Noah," Carly nodded. She turned to Sam and Freddie. "So, what do you two have planned for the rest of the night?"

"I was just gonna hang out here, if that's cool with you," Freddie said.

"You're not going to hang out together?" Carly frowned.

"Nah, remember? My old friend's dropping by," Sam said. Just then her phone began to ring. "Oh! That's him now?"

"A him?" Gibby said to Freddie as Sam answered her phone.

"Yeah? So?" Freddie shrugged as he began to put away his tech equipment.

"You mean you're okay with your girlfriend ditching you to hang out with some other dude?" Gibby asked.

"Gibby, Gibby, Gibby," Freddie said, chuckling. "When you're in a relationship, you need to have a certain level of trust among you. Sam and I love each other, so there's no reason for me to worry about her hanging out with other guys or for her to worry about me hanging out with other girls."

"Yeah, Hinton, that's hilarious," Sam laughed into her phone.

"Alright," Gibby said. "If you say so."

"I do say so," Freddie said. "Maybe when you fall in love one day and realize what I'm talking about."

"How cute," Carly smiled, walking over to the guys.

"Yeah, Buddy, I'm leaving now," Sam said grabbing her bag. "I'll see you there." She hung up her phone. "Okay, well I'm heading out," she said to the three.

"Um, okay," Freddie said, suddenly frowning. "But um, did you-the name of your friend you're meeting is Buddy Hinton?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded as she gave him a quick kiss. "I've known him for years. We hung out all the time when we were younger because our moms went to the same plastic surgeon. But then his mom married some dentist and they moved to Texas."

"Oh," Freddie said. "How, um, nice."

"I'll call you tonight," Sam to him. "Bye!"

"Well," Gibby said, taking his shirt off to reveal his scratched up back as Sam hurried out of the studio. "I'm gonna go hunt down some ointment for my back. And maybe some applesauce."

"Have fun with that," Carly said as Gibby left. She turned to Freddie. "So you wanna rent a movie of Getflix? I've been really wanting to see-"

"Oh man, oh man, this is bad!" Freddie said, beginning to nervously pace in front of his laptop.

"Okay, no movie then," Carly frowned. "What do you want to do-"

"No! I mean about Sam!" Freddie exclaimed.

"What about Sam?" Carly asked, confused.

"She's going to spend the night hanging out with _Buddy Hinton_!"

"Okay, I'm still not getting the big deal here," Carly said. "I thought you were fine with it. What happened to the whole big speech you gave Gibby about trust?"

"Do you _remember _who Buddy Hinton is?" Freddie snapped.

"No, am I supposed to know him?" Carly asked. "I didn't think Sam ever mentioned him before."

"She did, once," Freddie mumbled. "Back in ninth grade…that one night when we were all sitting up here after you two got back from seeing that lame move, what was it called? _The First Kiss_ or something?"

"Still not ringing a bell," Carly said.

"Remember how we all started talking about _our _first kisses?" Freddie said. "And she said that she had her first kiss at a Cuddlefish concert in a port-a-potty with _Buddy Hinton_?"

"Oh," Carly nodded, finally remembering what Freddie was talking about. "But Freddie, she told us she was lying about that, remember? _You _were her first kiss."

"I know," Freddie said. "But she was so ready with that story! You don't lie about who your first kiss was with using some random person! _Clearly _there was _something _between those two at some point to make her jump to his name!"

"Yeah, the fact that they're old friends," Carly said. "Freddie, you're just being a little paranoid. Sam loves you! She wouldn't leave you for anyone!"

"Yeah, but what if this Buddy Hinton _tries _to make her leave me?" Freddie questioned. "I don't know if you realize this, Carly, but Sam's hot! We're a pretty unbalanced couple on the attractiveness scale!"

"Oh relax," Carly said. "I'm sure that's not what Buddy wants. He just wants to see his old friend and catch up with her! For all you know he has a girlfriend of his own who's freaking out just as much about him going to see Sam! In fact, why don't we look him up on SplashFace so you can see him?"

"Good call," Freddie said, quickly pulling up SplashFace on his laptop. "I'll just search Buddy Hinton in Sam's friends and-Oh come on!"

Buddy Hinton's profile page revealed a picture of a tall, muscular man who was standing shirtless at a beach, the sun shining down on his sun-kissed skin.

"Whoa!" Carly said, staring at the picture. "_That's _Buddy Hinton?"

"Yeah, and look what it says under relationship status," Freddie said miserably. "Single."

"You think Sam can hook me up with him?" Carly asked excitedly. "Because he is _hot_!"

"Good, then date him," Freddie said. "That way he won't be tempted to steal Sam away from me!"

"He's not going to steal Sam from you," Carly assured him, still gawking at Buddy's picture. "Wow, look at those abs! Do you see his abs? Oh and his eyes!"

Freddie rolled his eyes as he stormed out of the studio.

….

"It's eleven thirty!" Freddie said anxiously. "Why isn't she back yet? Huh?"

"She never said she was coming back here, you know," Carly said, popping a few pieces of popcorn into her mouth as she watched her movie on the Shay's sofa.

"She always comes back here!" Freddie retorted.

"Whoa, somebody's in a mood," Spencer said, coming into the room.

"Sam's hanging out with Buddy Hinton," Carly explained.

"Hey, isn't the guy she had her first kiss with?" Spencer asked.

"_I _was her first kiss!" Freddie said angrily.

"Sorry!" Spencer said. "Jeesh."

"Nah, it's cool," Freddie sighed. "At least you remembered who he was. Unlike _Carly_."

"Hey, I won't be forgetting who he is now," Carly said. "I should text Sam and tell her to send me a few pics."

"You're not helping, you know," Freddie snapped.

Just then the apartment door opened and Sam walked in.

"Hey, you're back!" Freddie said, relieved. He rushed over and kissed her.

"Hey, what are you still doing here?" Sam asked. "Doesn't your batty mom always make you be home by eleven?"

"She's out of town," Freddie explained. "So, um, did you have fun tonight?"

"Oh yeah, Buddy and I had a blast," Sam said. "We went and got some wings, played a little lazar tag and got some ice cream."

"Sounds fun," Carly said.

"Yeah, fun," Freddie mumbled. "Hey, I was thinking, Sam. Why don't I take you out for brunch tomorrow?"

"Er, you think I could get a rain check on that?" Sam asked. "Buddy and I were going to down to this butcher shop where a friend of his works to get a bunch of free samples."

"Oh, um, yeah, okay," Freddie nodded.

"Anyway, I'm beat," Sam yawned. She turned to Carly. "It's cool if I spend the night?"

"I'm just surprised you asked," Carly said.

"Night, baby," Sam said, giving Freddie a kiss.

"Did you see that?" Freddie hissed as Sam ran upstairs. "She ditched me again to hang out with that Buddy!"

"Well she hasn't seen him in years," Carly pointed out.

"Yeah, well, I still don't like this guy," Freddie said firmly.

"You haven't even met him!" Carly said, somewhat amused.

"I still don't like him!" Freddie said as he stormed out back over to his apartment.

….

The next afternoon, Carly and Spencer were sitting at their table, eating tuna fish sandwiches.

"You know," Spencer said as he poured himself some lemonade. "Tuna fish is probably the best type of sandwich. You wanna know why?"

"Um, no," Carly frowned.

"Because it has such a good consistency," Spencer said, clearly not hearing his sister. "It's moist, but no moist as to ruin the sandwich, and-"

"Freddie!" Carly said, glad to have an opportunity to shut her brother up as Freddie let himself into the apartment. "What's up? You want a sandwich?"

"No, is Sam back yet?" he asked.

"No," Carly replied.

"She's hanging out with Buddy Hinton again?" Spencer asked.

"Yes," Freddie mumbled.

"Are we starting this again?" Carly asked, rolling her eyes. "Can't you just-" but then her phone buzzed, signaling that she got a text message.

"There, look," Carly said, looking down at her phone. "Sam just texted me…she says her and Buddy finished up at the butcher and are down at the Groovy Smoothie. She wants to know if it's okay if she brings Buddy up here."

"Yes, send him up!" Freddie said.

"Don't have to tell me twice," Carly said. "I can't believe I actually get to see those abs in person! You think there's any chance he's not wearing a shirt?"

"Oh, he'd better be!" Freddie said.

"Sam said they'll be up in a minute," Carly said. "Look, Freddie, just be nice to Buddy. Okay? There's nothing going on between him and Sam."

"Still," Freddie said. "I just want to make sure this guy knows that I'm not going to put up with an chicanery from him."

"You might make a better argument if you don't use words like 'chicanery'," Carly smiled.

Freddie was about to retort when the apartment door opened again and Sam walked in, followed by Buddy Hinton who was, to Freddie's dismay, much more attractive in person than he was in his SplashFace picture.

"Hi!" Carly said immediately, hurrying over to Sam and Buddy. "I'm Carly! You must be Buddy!"

"Um yeah, nice to meet you," Buddy said, shaking Carly's hand.

"Wow, firm grip," Carly said, clearly in her flirting mode.

"Yup, that's Carly," Sam said. "My best friend. And over there is Spencer, Carly's older brother."

"Hey!" Spencer called from the kitchen.

"And this," Sam said, looking over at Freddie. "Is Freddie Benson."

"Oh, he's the boyfriend, right?" Buddy asked.

"Yes, I'm Sam's _boyfriend_," Freddie said, putting his arm around Sam.

"Good to finally meet you; Sam's told me a lot about you," Buddy said. "Sam's a great girl. Just be sure to treat her right."

"So, did you two go to the Groovy Smoothie?" Carly asked, looking at the half-finished smoothie in Buddy's hand. "You know, I haven't been there in so long I think I forgot where it was."

"It's right across the street," Buddy said. "It only took us a minute to walk here from there."

"Well, I'm bad with directions," Carly said, grabbing Buddy's wrist. "Why don't you show me where it is?"

"Wow," Sam grinned as Carly dragged Buddy out of the apartment. "That took her a whole two minutes."

"Ah!" Spencer yelled from the kitchen. "I got tuna fish on my pants! Now I've got to go change them!"

"You mean there's tuna fish sandwiches in here and I'm just finding out about this _now_?" Sam frowned.

"They're in the kitchen; help yourself," Spencer said as he headed into his bedroom to change his pants.

"So," Sam said as she grabbed herself a sandwich. "You think Carly and Buddy will hit it off? I figured she'd like him; that's the whole reason I brought him over."

"Um, sure," Freddie nodded.

"You okay?" Sam frowned.

"Yeah," Freddie lied quickly.

"Dude…" Sam said knowingly.

"Okay," Freddie sighed. "It's just…why'd you say that you kissed _him_?"

Sam nearly chocked on her sandwich. "What? I never kissed him!"

"Yeah, I know that," Freddie said. "But you _said _you did. Remember? Before you and I had our first kiss, you said that you had your first kiss with him at a concert."

"Oh, yeah," Sam said.

"So why'd you say it was with him?" Freddie asked. "I mean, you could've said anyone. Why him?"

"I dunno," Sam shrugged. "I guess…he was the first person who popped into my head! I didn't want to admit that I hadn't kissed anyone, so I thought back to that concert him and I went to when my mom brought me down to Texas to visit him and his mom, and how I had _wanted _to-um, never-never mind."

"Wait, _what _was that last part?" Freddie frowned.

"Nothing," Sam said, looking down at her shoes.

"You _wanted _to kiss him at that concert?" Freddie said slowly.

"Ugh, fine, yes!" Sam admitted. "Look, back when we were kids…I sort of had a tiny little crush on Buddy."

"You-You did?"

"Yes, but I don't anymore!" Sam said. "I just set him up with Carly for crying out loud!"

Freddie didn't reply. He just sat down at the kitchen table, looking shell-shocked.

"Baby," Sam sighed. "Baby, come on. Are you really bothered about me having a crush on Buddy like, six years ago?"

"It's just…I didn't know that," Freddie said slowly. "And-And when you hung out with him last night and this morning…you didn't-you didn't feel anything for him again?"

"What? No!" Sam exclaimed. "I'm dating _you_!"

"I know, but, Sam, it's just weird, okay?" Freddie told her. "I mean, having your girlfriend hang around her old crush!"

"You mean like you do?" Sam asked simply.

"What are you talking about?" Freddie asked. "I don't hang around with-"

"Uh, hello? Carly!" Sam said. "You used to chase her around like an idiot! You had a much bigger crush on her than I ever did on Buddy!"

Freddie was flabbergasted. "I-I…I never thought of that, Sam. I-I didn't know that bothered you."

"It _doesn't_," Sam said. "I know you're over Carly. But that's my point! You're always going on about trust in relationships and blah, blah, blah. And we _do _trust each other, don't we?"

"I-yeah," Freddie nodded. "Yeah, of course, baby. I'm sorry. I just wasn't thinking straight. I guess I got a little jealous."

"Yeah, well," Sam said, giving him a long kiss. "It happens."


	254. Chapter 254

**AN- I never really thought about this pairing in this oneshot, but I got the request, so I wrote it! Anyway, if you guys like the pairing, go ahead and send in more requests for it, and if you don't, feel free to request other oneshots! Hope you enjoy!**

…**.**

_Mistake_

"I'm gonna puke!" eighteen-year old Emma said, barging into the Benson's house.

"Why are you going to puke?" Sam asked boredly, hardly looking up her game of balloon tennis she was playing with Carly on the couch.

"Is she sick?" Carly frowned.

"Nah, just being dramatic," Sam said. "She probably got stuck with a weird lab partner at school or something."

"I'm gonna puke!" Emma's twin sister, Ashton, exclaimed, storming into the house after her sister.

"Okay, now that's weird," Sam said, putting down her tennis racket.

"You guys," Clarissa said, walking into the house. "It's really not that big of a-"

"Yes it is!" Emma and Ashton said simultaneously.

"Wanna go find out what's up?" Carly asked.

"Sure, why not, cable's out," Sam shrugged. The two headed into the kitchen where the teens were.

"I swear, I'm gonna need to dig my eyes out just to erase what I saw!" Emma said, grabbing a handful of chips and stuffing them in her mouth.

"Yeah, Clarissa! I'm like, scarred now, you know!" Ashton said.

"What happened?" Carly asked.

"They're over-reacting," Clarissa said.

"We are _not _over-reacting!" Emma said.

"Yeah, in fact, I think we're _under-_reacting here!" Ashton nodded.

"Okay, well something big obviously happened because you two haven't agreed since you could talk," Sam said. "So spill."

"Oh, we will," Emma said. "But just be warned; this is probably the most disturbing story you'll ever hear in your lives."  
"So Emma and I were waiting for Clarissa so we could drive home," Ashton said. "And almost ten minutes pass and there's no sign of her."

"So we try calling her, and texting her, but no answer," Emma said. "So we decided we'd go see if she was hanging out with her friend on the cheerleading team. So we head over to the football field, where all the players were practicing, and you know what we find?"

"Underneath the bleachers, making out," Ashton said, cringing as she recalled the scene. "Were Clarissa and-"

"Tyler!" Emma finished.

Sam and Carly exchanged shocked glances.

"Tyler?" Sam repeated.

"As in your brother Tyler?" Carly frowned.

"Yes!" the twins exclaimed.

"You guys," Clarissa said, blushing furiously. "It's really not that bad! I mean, you're dating Quincy, Emma!"

"Yeah, Quincy! He's not my best friend's brother!"

"You see," Clarissa groaned. "This is why we didn't want to tell you right away!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Ashton frowned. "You mean this has been going on for awhile? How long?"

"About a month," Clarissa mumbled.

"Hold on, that's why you offered to tutor Tyler for his math test last week," Emma said. "And why you were hanging out over here last weekend when neither of us were here," Ashton said.

"Yeah…" Clarissa admitted.

"You know what?" Carly said. "I think this is great!"

"Huh?" Emma and Ashton frowned.

"Really?" Clarissa asked her mom.

"Sure!" Carly said. "I remember before we found out Emma and Ashton were going to be girls I was sort of hoping Sam and Freddie would have another son so you could marry him and they Sam and I could be co-grandmas together."

"We're not quite there yet, mom," Clarissa smiled.

"But Clarissa," Ashton said. "You're a senior. You're popular! You're _hot_! You could be dating someone a lot better than some sophomore like Tyler."

"Tyler's on the football team," Clarissa pointed out. "And I happen to like him a lot better than any senior guys I know."

"But he's gross," Emma cringed. "And an idiot!"

"Maybe to you," Clarissa said. "But I happen to think he's really sweet and thoughtful and attractive and-"

"Okay, now I'm really going to hurl," Emma said running upstairs.

"I've got to get going," Clarissa said, looking at her watch. "Me and Tyler are supposed to get coffee after his practice."

"I can't believe this," Ashton mumbled as Clarissa hurried out of the house.

"What?" Sam asked.

"My best friend and my brother!" Ashton moaned. "How messed up is that?"

"Wow," Carly said as Ashton ran upstairs after Emma. "This is really unexpected…But hey! Our kids are dating!"

"Yeah, that's…great," Sam nodded.

"What's wrong? It doesn't sound like you think it's great," Carly said.

"No, no I do," Sam said.

"I can't believe they've been dating a month, though," Carly said. "I wonder why Clarissa never told me."

"Probably because she knew you'd probably act in your usual Carly way," Sam suggested.

"I wasn't that bad!" Carly defended.

"Carls, you're already planning for their grandchildren," Sam reminded her.

"Oh, right," Carly said. "Well, still, I'll have to have a nice mother-daughter talk with Clarissa tonight so I can get the deats. I'm sure you'll be doing the same thing with Tyler."

"Um, yeah, sure," Sam nodded.

"Well, I need to get home," Carly said, looking at her watch. "See you tomorrow future in-law!"

"Oh boy," Sam sighed.

…

"Hey," Freddie greeted his wife later that evening as he entered the house.

"Hey," Sam said, hanging up her Pearphone. "I was just talking to Jason."

"Oh yeah? How's he doing down there in California?" Freddie asked, hanging up his jacket by the door.

"He's still looking for future jobs to start once he graduates Cal Tech this year," Sam replied.

"He'll get something," Freddie said, giving his wife a quick kiss. "So where are the other kids?"

"Out," Sam replied. "Looks like it's just the two of us tonight."

"I think we can make that work," Freddie smiled at her. "Wanna order in a pizza?"

"Already ahead of you, baby," Sam said. "I ordered one ten minutes ago that should be here any minute."

"Good, because I'm starving," Freddie said, collapsing onto the couch next to Sam.

"So," Sam said. "I heard some…interesting news today."

"What about?" Freddie asked.

"Well," Sam said. "Apparently…Tyler's been going out with Clarissa for the past month."

"Clarissa?" Freddie repeated. "As in _Carly's _daughter?"

"She _is _the only Clarissa we know," Sam reminded him.

"Wow," Freddie said. "That's a bit of a shocker. But hey, good for him. Clarissa's a great girl."

"Yeah, I know," Sam said. "That's the problem."

"Um, problem?" Freddie frowned.

"Dude, come on," Sam said. "You know Tyler…How many girls has he dated since high school?"

"More than I can even remember," Freddie said.

"And how long do those girls usually last?" Sam asked.

"About two weeks tops," Freddie said. "Oh…I see the problem."

"Yup," Sam sighed. "Carly may be real thrilled about this whole thing, but I bet you Clarissa's dad is freaking out right now."

"Hey, Tyler's still a nice guy," Freddie said. "He's not going to hurt Clarissa!"

"I know, but still, if it were the other way around, you probably wouldn't be too thrilled about one of the twins going out with someone who has had as many girlfriends as Tyler's had either."

"Yeah, you're right," Freddie admitted.

"I didn't want to say anything to Carly," Sam said. "But I don't think this whole thing's a good idea…I mean, what if when they break up things become awkward around us and Carly? And what if Clarissa doesn't feel comfortable coming over here to hang out with Emma and Ashton anymore? The girls already freaked out when they found out the two of them were dating!"

"Okay, well, we don't know any of that will happen," Freddie said. "Sure, Tyler doesn't have the _best_ track record with girls-"

"Yeah, no chiz," Sam said. "We should've figured something was up with him when we realized he hasn't had any of his usual bimbo girls over here."

"-But maybe he'll surprise us," Freddie said. "After all, he's been with Clarissa for a month now, hasn't he? That's already the longest girlfriend he's had."

"That's true," Sam said. "I just hope this thing doesn't turn into one big mistake."

…

The next day, Freddie stood outside Tyler's bedroom door. He knocked twice.

"Come in!" Tyler called, and Freddie let himself in.

"Hey," Freddie said, looking around at his youngest child's cluttered bedroom.

"Oh, hey dad, what's up?" Tyler asked from his bed, where he was laying back on his pillows, shooting baskets into his wall hoop.

"Don't you have a history test to be studying for?" Freddie asked.

"Um…sort of," Tyler said. "I was, er, just taking a study break."

"Yeah, sure," Freddie said, sitting down at Tyler's desk. "So…I hear that you and Clarissa are dating now."

"Yeah," Tyler nodded. "Em and Ash freaked out, which was sort of funny. But I guess that's why Clarissa wanted to wait awhile before we told everyone."

"Yeah, probably," Freddie said. "Listen, Ty-"

"Oh hey, I wanted to ask you if you had a tie I could borrow for tomorrow night," Tyler said. "Me and Clarissa are going to some fancy restaurant where I can't even pronounce half the things on the menu."

"Um, yeah, that's fine," Freddie said. "But Tyler, I wanted to talk to you about this whole thing."

"Dad," Tyler said, rolling his eyes. "We already had that talk when I was twelve, remember? As much as I enjoyed that puppet show…"

"No, not that," Freddie said quickly. "It's just, now I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but you've sort of dated a lot of girls. Now, I know that doesn't mean anything. And don't tell your mom this, but I've sort of enjoyed seeing my son being the stud I never really was in high school. But, well, I just wanted to make sure that you weren't dating Clarissa for the wrong reasons."

"Wrong reasons?" Tyler frowned.

"You know," Freddie said. "She's a senior, she's pretty popular. I just wanted to make sure that you really liked her, and weren't going out with her-"

"-Just because she's hot?" Tyler finished.

"Well, yeah, basically," Freddie said.

"Dad," Tyler said. "Believe it or not…I actually really like Clarissa. A lot. More than any of those other girls I've dated. And it's not just because she's hot, although that doesn't hurt. She's really funny, and she's really good at being a leader, and she's smart. Oh, and she does this one thing where-"

"Okay, okay, I got it," Freddie smiled. "So…you really like her, huh?"

"Yeah," Tyler nodded.

"Well then I'm happy for you," Freddie said. "Just be sure to be a gentleman, okay?"

"Got it," Tyler nodded.

Freddie got to his feet, feeling a surge of pride in his son. He had never seen him like this. It was a refreshing change.

"Oh, and dad?" Tyler said.

"Yeah?" Freddie asked.

"Could possible borrow your credit card for my date tomorrow?"

Freddie sighed. It looked like some things would never change with that kid.


	255. Chapter 255

**AN- Hey, so this is a sequel to ch 184, where Sam thought Freddie was cheating on her with a girl from his sewing class.**

**Oh, and I forgot to mention in the last chapter with Tyler and Clarissa that I tweaked the ages for that specific plot so that Tyler was only two years younger than the girls, instead of four, like he is in all the other oneshots.**

…**.**

_Info_

"So you two are good now?" Carly asked as she poured three glasses of iced tea.

"Yeah," Freddie said, putting his arm around Sam. "We're good. I'd never cheat on Sam."

"I think we can blame your mom for this one," Sam smiled. "Putting you in a sewing class…she really _did _want a girl, didn't she?"

"Sewing's not just for girls, you know," Carly said. "Spencer knows how to sew."

Sam gave Carly a look.

"Not really helping my argument there, am I?" Carly said, sipping her drink. Just then her phone beeped.

"Oh my God!" she exclaimed, looking down at her text message. "Kurt Winnipeg just texted me! He wants to catch a movie tonight!"

"Who's Kurt?" Freddie asked.

"Her latest crush," Sam explained.

"He's _beautiful_," Carly said. "Sam, you have to come upstairs with me and help me decide on what to wear. Do I go dress? Do I wear my new silver heels?"

"You're going to a _movie_," Sam pointed out.

"So? It's with Kurt!" Carly said, grabbing her best friend's wrist. "Come on!"

Freddie chuckled as the girls hurried upstairs to Carly's room.

He had just grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl on the counter when the apartment door opened up and Spencer walked in.

"Well, well, well," Spencer said, glaring at Freddie as he slammed the front door closed behind him. "Look who it is."

"Um, hi?" Freddie frowned.

"Don't _hi_ me mister!" Spencer said. "What was the _one _thing I told you never to do? Huh!"

"Um, get circus clowns mad?" Freddie asked, confused.

"No!" Spencer said loudly. "The one thing I told you never to do, when you first started dating Sam, was to hurt her! I told you to never hurt Sam or else, and what do you do?"

"Oh, that," Freddie said, laughing. "Look, that whole thing was just-"

"Oh, so you think that's funny?" Spencer asked. "Do you realize that before today, I had _never _seen Sam Puckett cry? And today, I did. And she was crying because of _you_!"

"Spencer," Freddie started. "I get why you're-"

"I have to say, I'm _shocked_, Freddie," Spencer said, his voice taking the serious tone it almost never did. "I thought you were a nice guy. That finally Sam could have a decent boyfriend. But I guess I was wrong about that…"

"But Spencer, I-"

"And you remember what else I said to you when you and Sam first started dating?" Spencer asked, stepping closer to Freddie.

"Er, no," Freddie said.

"I said that if you ever _did _hurt her," Spencer said, kicking off his shoes as he stepped even closer to Freddie. "That'd I make you pay."

"Wait," Freddie said, frowning. "Are you actually going to try and beat me up?"

"Not try, my friend!" Spencer said. "Will! Oh, and I'm required by law to tell you that I got my white belt in karate when I was nine!"

"Um, what's going on down here?" Carly asked as her and Sam came downstairs.

"Just teaching Freddie here a little lesson about being a scutter!" Spencer said.

"Okay…why?" Sam asked.  
"Why?" Spencer frowned. "Because he cheated on you!"

"No, I didn't!" Freddie said.

"Don't try and deny-"

"Er, yeah, actually Spencer, he didn't," Sam said quickly. "See, turns out the girl I saw him with at the Groovy Smoothie with the love smoothie was just some chick from his sewing class. Her boyfriend was coming to meet them, which is why she bought that love smoothie."

"Sewing class?" Spencer repeated. "Dude, that' so lame."

"Thanks!" Freddie snapped.

"So, why'd you take your shoes off to beat up Freddie?" Carly asked her brother.

"It's what everyone on T.V. does," Spencer shrugged. He turned back to Sam "So I don't need to hurt him?"

"Nah," Sam grinned. "Not this time. But hey, thanks though, Spence."

"No problem," Spencer said. "Oh, and sorry about almost beating you up there, Freddie."

"Yeah, it's cool," Freddie said.

"This wouldn't have happened if I was kept in the loop, you know!" Spencer said. "We're in the age of technology, people! You could've sent me this new info in a matter of seconds!"

"Okay, next time we'll keep you up-to-date on any inter-group drama," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"That's all I ask," Spencer said as he retreated to his bedroom.


	256. Chapter 256

_Vanishing_

"Ow! Sam!"

"What?" Sam asked innocently, walking into the living room.

"You threw an orange at me!" Freddie exclaimed, rubbing the spot on his arm where the fruit had just hit me.

"I thought we were playing Boomba," Sam said.

"When did I agree to that?" Freddie asked.

"Dude, just let me borrow your car," Sam said.

"What?"

"I need to go visit Uncle Carmine, and my car's low on gas," Sam said.

"Fine, here," Freddie said, tossing his wife his car keys.

"Thanks," Sam said. "Oh, and by the way, I won Boomba."

"I wasn't even playing!" Freddie said, but Sam was already out the door.

Rolling his eyes, Freddie tried to get back to watching the news like he had been before Sam had assaulted him with the orange. But no more than five minutes had passed before the doorbell rang.

Sighing, Freddie got to his feet and answered the door.

"Quincy?" Freddie said, opening the door to reveal his daughter's boyfriend. "Hey, what are you doing here?"

"Um, I was, just wondering if-if you would mind helping me back up some files on my laptop," Quincy said. "If-If you're not busy, Mr. Benson? Whenever I try to do it, the files end up vanishing or something."

"Mr. Benson?" Freddie frowned. "Quincy, since when have you called me Mr. Benson?"

"Oh, sorry then…sir," Quincy said.

"Um, alright," Freddie said, still confused. "Yeah, I can help you with your laptop. Why didn't you just ask Emma, though? She could've done this for you in a second."

"Oh, she's-she's out having lunch with some friends," Quincy said.

"Oh," Freddie shrugged. "Okay. Come on in, then."

"Thank you," Quincy said, and Freddie found it best not to question the young man's formal attitude. After all, he _was_ Gibby's son.

"So, you just want these files backed up on an external hard drive?" Freddie asked, taking Quincy's laptop from him. "That shouldn't take too long…You know, I've been telling Sam for years that she needs to do this with her laptop but nooo, she won't listen to me. One of these days she's going to get a virus or something and I'm gonna have to be the one to who has to sit there and recover all her files manually."

"What?" Quincy said, appearing to come out of deep thoughts. "Oh, yeah…"

"You feeling okay, Quince?" Freddie asked as he began to type a few things into the laptop.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine," Quincy said shakily. "Just nervous…"

"Nervous?" Freddie asked, finishing his work on the laptop and handing it back to Quincy. "What about?"

"Um, well…I sort of wanted to ask you something," Quincy said.

"You have another tech problem?" Freddie asked.

"No, nothing like that," Quincy said slowly. "It's just…I-You know how Emma and I have been dating for almost seven years now?"

"Yes," Freddie said. "What about that?"

"I-Well, I-really love her," Quincy started. "She's the best thing in my life. And now that we're both out of college and have pretty decent jobs, I-I've decided that I really want to marry her."

"Marry her?" Freddie repeated, his eyes bulging.

"Yeah," Quincy nodded. "That's sort of why I came over here today. I wanted to ask for your permission."

"I-wow," Freddie said, leaning back in his seat. "Wow…Quincy, you realize marriage is a really big step, right?"

"I know," Quincy said. "But I know we're ready for it. Emma means everything to me, and I don't want to spend the rest of my life with anyone but her."

Freddie nodded, and for a moment, the two men were completely silent.

"I know you love her," Freddie finally said. "I see how you two act around each other…truthfully you two remind me of me and Sam sometimes."

Quincy grinned. "Yeah. Everyone tells us that."

"I bet," Freddie said. "And I know you'd be great husband to Emma. I know you'd never hurt her and you'd always be there for her. So…of course, Quincy. I'd be happy if you'd marry Emma."

"Really?" Quincy said, his face lighting up. "You mean that?"

"Welcome to the family," Freddie said, standing up to give his future son-in-low a hug.

….

"I wish, just for once, Uncle Carmine would go and get sent to a jail closer to the house," Sam said as she returned home.

"Did you have a good visit?" Freddie asked, giving his wife a long kiss.

"Yeah, until it got cut short when Uncle Carmine decided to through his Jell-O at a CO," Sam replied.

"Hmm, sounds fun," Freddie smiled.

"You seem like you're in a good mood," Sam commented.

"Yeah, well, I just found out some really exciting news," Freddie said, still smiling.

"What?" Sam asked.

"I don't think I can-"

"Dude," Sam said warningly.

"Okay, okay," Freddie conceded, chuckling. "While you were gone, Quincy came over here and he asked for my permission to ask Emma to marry him."

"What? No way!" Sam exclaimed. "He's gonna propose?"

"Yup," Freddie nodded. "Can you believe that? Our little girl is getting married."

"Wow…" Sam said. "She's gonna be so happy."

"I know," Freddie agreed. "They really are in love."

"I know the feeling," Sam said, smiling at her husband.


	257. Chapter 257

**AN-Hey, this is a sequel to chapter 231, where Freddie comes back from the Middle East and surprises Sam.**

…**.**

_Enclosing_

"-And this is my new robot super hero," Jason said, handing his father his toy. "He used to be able to talk, but I dropped him on accident in the pool. But he's still my favorite."

"Wow, I can see why, this guy's pretty awesome," Freddie laughed.

Ever since the family had been home, they had been in Jason's room, where the three-year old had been showing Freddie nearly everything in there, from his stuffed animals to his favorite books.

"And these are my new shoes," Jason said, showing his dad his new blue sneakers. "They make me run really fast!"

Freddie chuckled and glanced over at Sam, who was sitting right next to him on Jason's bed.

"It's true," Sam smiled. "You know how hard it is to catch him in those things?"

"I always win when I play tag with mommy!" Jason said. He gave a long yawn.

"Sounds like someone's tired," Freddie laughed.

"No I'm not!" Jason said, yawning again.

"Hey Jason, why don't you go get your bedtime book for daddy to read to you tonight?" Sam suggested.

"Yay!" Jason exclaimed, running to his bookshelf and grabbing a picture book. "Look daddy! It's all about dinosaurs."

"I see," Freddie said, taking the book from his son. "And are you going to tell me you know how to read now too?"

"That says _'Dino's Day in Dino School_," Jason grinned, pointing at the book's title.

"What? You _can _read now?" Freddie exclaimed.

"Nah," Sam laughed. "He's just got that book memorized from having everybody read it to him so much."

"Oh, is that it?" Freddie said, rustling his son's hair.

After Freddie read Jason his story three times, he had finally fallen asleep. Sam turned off the lights in the bedroom and her and Freddie quietly snuck out.

"Wow," Freddie said as they gently shut Jason's door. "You realize when I left last year he could barely form sentences? Now he's talking like a person!"

"Yeah, I know," Sam said. "He's a little chatterbox now…" She put her arms around his neck. "I missed you. So much," she whispered as he pulled her closer to him.

"Sam, you have no idea how much I missed you either," Freddie said, kissing the top of her head. "Not seeing you everyday…it was worse than I could've ever imagined."

"It was so long too," Sam said softly as the couple retreated into their bedroom. "A year…you realize that the two of us probably haven't gone a day without seeing each other since we were thirteen?"

"Well I promise, baby," Freddie said as the two sat down on their bed. "I'm never going to leave you again. My tech agency did its time over there. We never have to go back."  
"Good," Sam said. "Because I don't think I can handle doing this all over again." And then, without warning, she began to cry.

"Sam-" Freddie started, concerned.

"Freddie, you don't know what it was like over here," Sam said, wiping her eyes, her voice shaking. "Every day, every single day for the past year, all I could think about was whether you were okay and if something had happened to you. It was the worst; I knew it would be hard when you left, but I never thought it would be like that! And then we'd always hear on the news about explosions or other incidents over there and of course the first thing that pops into my head is what if you were involved in it!"

"Sam," Freddie said gently, moving closer to his wife, enclosing the small gap between them. "It's over. I'm here now."

"I know," Sam said, resting her head on his chest. "I guess I just never realized how much-how much of a mess I would be without you."

"Hey, you weren't a mess," Freddie said. "You took care of Jason all by yourself for an entire year!"

"Yeah, and every night I would come in here and spend an hour trying to fall asleep because I could never get used to the empty bed," Sam admitted.

Freddie didn't reply. He simply leaned down and kissed her.

"I don't want you to leave again," Sam whispered when they pulled apart.

"I never want to leave again either," Freddie said. "It's too hard to be away from you."


	258. Chapter 258

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 199, where Sam confronts Freddie after they both stopped working at the Pear Store. **

_Uniform_

Freddie walked into the Shay's apartment, Sam's words still running in his mind

_Did you ever think I took the job just to hang out with you_?

That was ridiculous, Freddie told himself. Sam wouldn't go through actual _work _just to hang out with him! Especially since she sees him everyday. But then he remembered what else Sam said; that they hadn't done anything together, just the two of them, since they had dated…

But that wasn't true, was it? Freddie racked his mind, but to his surprise, he couldn't come up with one recent incident where the two had done something without either Carly, Gibby, Spencer or _someone _there.

"Freddie?" Carly said, bringing Freddie out of his thoughts. "You okay?"

"Hmm? Oh, yeah," Freddie said, realizing he had been standing in the doorway for several minutes. "I'm fine. Or as fine as a guy could be who just got fired."

"Sam already told me all about it," Carly said sympathetically. "Don't beat yourself up over it. You didn't really get fired, after all."

"Um, what?" Freddie said.

"Come on," Carly chuckled. "You did the right thing. Leaving your job in protest isn't the same thing as getting fired."

"Leaving my job in protest?" Freddie repeated.  
"Yeah, Sam told me what happened," Carly said. "About how your awful manager was trying to get you to raise the prices on all the merchandise just to rip off customers? I still can't believe you had the courage to walk out like that. You loved that job! I mean, no offense, you weren't very good at it, but you loved it!"

"_That's _what Sam told you happened?" Freddie asked.

"Well yeah," Carly shrugged. "She came by a few minutes ago. But I think she was sort of upset about work too; she went upstairs to lay down."

"Um, what else did Sam say?" Freddie asked.

"Nothing much," Carly said. "But I didn't pry too much. Like I said, she seemed moody."

"Oh," Freddie said, furrowing his brow in confusion. "So…Sam's upstairs?"

"Yeah, why?" Carly asked, but Freddie was already on his way up the steps.

Why hadn't Sam told Carly about his unceremonious firing at the Pear Store? She had made him seem like some sort of hero, not like the terrible employee he knew he was.

He reached the iCarly studio and saw Sam lying on one of the beanbag chairs, still wearing her Pear Store uniform. He opened the glass door and walked in.

"Hey," he said.

Sam looked up. "Hey," she mumbled.

Freddie sat down at the beanbag chair across from her.

"What do you want?" Sam asked.

"To talk to you," Freddie answered truthfully. "About what you said at the mall about-"

"Forget about that, will you?" Sam said quickly. "Just…Just pretend I never said anything, okay?"

Freddie nodded. "Okay. But let me ask you about something else then. Why didn't you tell Carly what _really _happened at the Pear Store? You know, about my melt down and me being fired in front of everyone? You made me seem…cool, with your story."

"So?" Sam snapped.

"Well," Freddie said. "You've never done anything to make me look good before."

Sam groaned. "Are you still going on about this? About how it's _so weird _for me to do anything nice for you? I figured you had a bad enough day, so I didn't tell Carly about how you got fired and gave her the first story that popped into my mind!"

"I just would never expect you to do something like that," Freddie said. "I mean, you never go out of your way to be nice to me. Well, except for that one week before the lock-in, but that was because…"

"Can you just leave?" Sam mumbled, but her voice wasn't harsh or demanding. It was almost a plea.

Something finally clicked in Freddie's head. Sam had taken a job at the Pear Store to spend time with him. She wanted to be alone with him. She lied to Carly about his embarrassing incident at the Pear Store…Did she still have feelings for him?

And then he felt a wave of shame as he realized how he had been treating her these past few months. He had yelled at her for taking the job at the Pear Store when she didn't even give him any trouble there, he had been putting her down, and had even been just plain out _mean _to her. But didn't she realize? That had been the only way he could think of to get over her…

"Sam," he said gently. "Do you-Do you still-?"

"Would it matter?" Sam asked, skillfully avoiding his eye contact. "You clearly don't."

Freddie raised an eyebrow. "Why would you assume that?"

Sam scoffed. "Give me a break, Benson. It's pretty obvious. You're back to drooling over Carly, you rip on me every chance I get, you-"

She was cut off as Freddie pressed his lips to hers impulsively. She was startled at first, but as she felt the familiar wave of sparks down her spine, she quickly responded, kissing him back passionately. But then she pulled away and gave him an inquiring look.

"What was that for?" she asked hesitantly.

"I'm sorry," Freddie said. "For how I've been treating you lately. I've been acting sort of…jerky, and it wasn't right."

Sam frowned. "So the kiss was an apology?" She knew it had been too good to be true.

"Yes," Freddie nodded. "But it was also my way of telling you how long I've wanted to do that. I guess that's the reason I've been such a jerk to you. I figured it would make it easier to get over you…but it never really worked. So I would try harder."

"That sounds like something _I _would do," Sam pointed out.

"Yeah, well," Freddie grinned. "I guess you had a pretty strong influence on me." And with that he leaned in and kissed her again, wondering how he had gone for so many months without her.


	259. Chapter 259

**AN-Hey, so this chapter is a sequel to chapter 243, where Carly finds out that Sam had slept over at Freddie's for the first time. **

…**..**

_Bringing_

"I wish they wouldn't put so many commercials on during _Girly Cow_," Sam mumbled as she flipped through the television channels. "Or at least not put so many shampoo commercials on. No one's that happy when they're taking a shower!"

"Maybe the shampoo smells really good," Carly suggested. "And anyway, I'd have thought you'd be in a better mood!"

"Why?" Sam frowned.

"Because of last night!" Carly exclaimed. "You and Freddie-"

"Carly, for the love of ham, will you chill out?" Sam groaned. "And keep it down, will you? Spencer's in his room and I do _not _want him to find out about this _ever. _You have any idea how awkward that will be?"

"Yeah, that would be pretty bad," Carly agreed, cringing. "But he's taking a shower now, and he has a brand new bar of fancy soap, so he'll be in there for awhile. Now come on Puckett, spill. We didn't get a chance to talk about this earlier."

"I thought you didn't want to know about it," Sam reminded her. "I thought you said that it would be weird since it was with Freddie."

"Well don't tell me _every _detail," Carly said. "But how did it happen? Did you and Freddie plan it?"

"Sam and Freddie planned what?" Spencer asked, coming into the room wearing a fluffy pink bathrobe.

"Um, nothing," Sam said quickly.

"I thought you were taking a shower," Carly said, looking at her brother. "And will you stop using my robe!"

"This isn't your robe!" Spencer retorted. "I happened to go down to Baths R Us and buy myself one since _someone_'_s _selfish!"

"My mom's banned from there," Sam commented, yawning. "Hey, I'm pretty tired. Is it cool if I spend the night here?"

"Sure," Carly nodded. "You gonna go get all your things from Fred-ow! Oh, um, never mind."

"You guys okay?" Spencer frowned. "You've been acting sort of weird all day."

"Yeah," Sam nodded, still glaring at Carly. "We're just really excited about tonight's _America Sings_…I'll be back in a little bit."

"Where's she going?" Spencer asked, sitting down next to Carly.

"Probably to bring her toothbrush and pajamas," Carly said. "Which are located at _her _house. Not anywhere here in Bushwell Plaza, that's for sure."

"I can drive her," Spencer said. "It looks like it may rain. Let me just go grab some pants and I'll-"

"Sam has an umbrella," Carly said quickly.

"You sure?" Spencer asked, getting to his feet and heading into the kitchen. "Because I don't mind-ow!" As he had been walking into the kitchen, he tripped and fell, nearly hitting his head on the counter.

"You alright there?" Carly asked.

"Yeah," Spencer said, massaging his shoulder. "I just tripped over Sam's shoes…Hey, wait a minute. She didn't leave to walk home without her shoes, did she?"

"Um, well, you know Sam," Carly offered lamely. "Hey, why don't you go get dressed? I hear it's bad to sit around in bath robes all day."

"Wait, why does Sam even need to go home to get her stuff?" Spencer asked. "Doesn't she have everything over here from last night? She slept over, right? That's why she was here so early?"

"Um, yeah," Carly nodded. "But, um, she has a different color toothbrush for every day of the week, and tonight's purple night, so she had to run back and get that."

"Since when does she have-"

"I don't know, okay?" Carly exclaimed.

"Okay, jeesh!" Spencer frowned. "Seriously, what's up with you?"

"Sorry," Carly sighed.

"Well, I'm gonna go check the mail," Spencer said as he headed to the front door.

"In your bathrobe?" Carly frowned.

"Hey! I paid fifty bucks for this robe, I'll wear it wherever I want!" Spencer retorted.

"Alright," Carly chuckled as Spencer opened the door.

"Hey, Sam. You're back from your house already?" Spencer said.

"Huh?" Carly said, jumping up and joining her brother by the door, where she saw Sam coming out of the Benson's apartment with a pile of her clothes and her toothbrush.

"Um…yeah?" Sam said awkwardly.

"How'd you get back here so fast?" Spencer asked. "You live at least ten minutes from here."

"Well, you'd better get down to the lobby to check you mail," Carly said quickly, trying to push Spencer away.

"Wait a minute," Spencer said. "You were coming out of Freddie's apartment…"

"Well, I just wanted to stop by and see if his mom bought any non-organic food," Sam said. "But she didn't, so…"

"So you managed to get to and from your house _and _stop by Freddie's place in a matter of…four minutes?" Spencer said.

"She's a fast runner," Carly said. "In fact, Sam was just talking to me, um, about trying out for the track team, and un-"

"Sam," Freddie suddenly said, joining them. "You forgot your shampoo bottle in my-Oh! Spencer…didn't expect you to be here."

"Shampoo bottle?" Spencer frowned. "Why would Sam need a shampoo bottle at your place? That doesn't make any-No!"

Spencer's eyes widened as everything began to click in his head. "You two-But you don't-You-"

"Well, we're gonna go now," Sam said quickly as her and Carly turned to head back into the Shay's apartment.

"Yeah, I'll come with you," Freddie said.

"You stay!" Spencer said loudly.

"Um, okay," Freddie said weakly.

Sam cast her boyfriend a sympathetic look as her and Carly disappeared into the apartment.

"I don't-You-I can't even think where to _begin _with you right now!" Spencer said.

"Look, Spencer-" Freddie began.

"Don't 'Look, Spencer' me!" Spencer snapped. "I thought you knew better! I thought you were a _gentleman_!"

"Spencer, Sam and I have been dating for awhile now," Freddie said. "Don't you think you're overacting just a little bit?"

"No!" Spencer said.

"Come on," Freddie said. "Please don't do this. I love Sam. All we did was-"

"Don't!" Spencer said firmly. Then he sighed. "Okay, Freddie. I get it. I know that couples all eventually…do_ things_. And as much as I try to pretend that you and Sam aren't like other couples…I guess deep down I did know that one day you two would…do that. But I was just hoping to never _ever_ find out about it."

"Believe me, we were planning on keeping it that way too," Freddie mumbled.

"Just…don't think that this means that you don't have to treat Sam right anymore," Spencer said.

"Spence," Freddie chuckled. "You know I would never hurt Sam."

"Yeah, I know," Spencer nodded. "And from now on, will you try harder to make sure I never find out about your…couple activities again?"

"Don't worry," Freddie assured him.

"Good," Spencer said. "Well…this has been sufficiently awkward. I'm just gonna go down stairs and bring up my mail."

"In your bathrobe?" Freddie frowned.

"Stop trying to change me!"


	260. Chapter 260

_Packing_

Sam knew early on that her and Freddie's oldest son, Jason, would be going to a top college. Heck when the kid was only four years he was already taking apart his electronic toys to try and see how they worked.

So when Jason was in his senior year of high school and ecstatically threw up his acceptance letter from his dream school, Cal Tech, Sam and Freddie both, weren't surprised.

Freddie was of course overjoyed that his son had gotten into such a prestigious school. He had always dreamed of going to a school like Cal Tech, and if he hadn't gotten such a good job with the Pear Company right out of high school, he would've actually considered attending such a school.

Sam was happy for Jason as well. She knew that Jason would do great at college, and that he needed to go, but that didn't stop her from feeling a sense of depression when she realized that her first born child, her baby, would be leaving her.

"Wow, this place is pretty nice looking," Freddie said as he heaved one of Jason's suitcases into his new dorm room at Cal Tech. "Did you see the size of that computer lab? You could really do some fast research in there!"

"Forget the computer lab," fourteen-year old Ashton said as her and the rest of the family joined them in the dorm. "Have you seen all the hot college guys here?"

"What hot college guys?" Emma frowned. "This place is geek city!"

"Girls, just go with Tyler back out to the car and grab some more bags," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"So when do classes start again?" Freddie asked as his other three children filed out.

"Next Monday," Jason replied as he opened on of his boxes and began to place some of his clothes in a dresser drawer. "Can you believe I'm actually taking a physics class taught by Leo Cooper? One of the country's best physicists is actually going to be my teacher!"

"I know! How cool is that?" Freddie exclaimed.

"You sure _you _don't want to go here?" Sam asked.

"Ha, ha," Freddie said. "I'm gonna go back out to the car and help the kids bring in the rest of Jason's stuff."

Sam watched as Freddie left, leaving her and Jason alone in the dorm.

"So," Sam said. "You need help unpacking the rest of this stuff?"

"Nah, I'll do it later," Jason replied. "My roommate doesn't move in for another four days, so I'll have plenty of time."

"Well, are you _sure _you have everything?" Sam asked, beginning to open up some of the boxes anyway to help Jason move in. "Your dad and I can run to the store if you forgot something. You have enough winter clothes? This may be California, but it still gets cold, you know. What about money? You have enough? I'll put some more money in your bank account when we get back to Seattle. And do you have-"

"Mom, I've got everything need," Jason said.

"Yeah…I guess you do," Sam said softly. She didn't want to cry…she had never cried in front of any of her kids, and she wasn't about to start now. "Just…Just remember to call, okay?"

"I will," Jason promised. "And I'm coming back home in a few months for Thanksgiving, remember?"

"I know," Sam said. "But…oh just come here!"

She pulled her son, who now stood a good six inches above her in height, into an embrace.

"Promise you'll take care of yourself down here," she whispered.

"I will, mom," Jason said, hugging her back. "And you know, California's not that far away. You can always come down and visit."

"Yeah well, considering how in love your dad is with this place, I don't doubt we'll be taking you up on that," Sam smiled.

"Oh man, we just passed one of the library's on our way back from the car," Freddie said, walking into the room with the other kids. "This place is better than Dingo World!"

"Glad you like it," Jason said. "Are-Are those the last of the boxes?"

"Yup," Freddie said. "That's everything."

For a moment, the family stood there, knowing what was going to come next.

"Well," Freddie said finally. "We-We need to get that moving truck back to Seattle by tonight. We-We should probably be getting back on the road now. You know, if we want to beat traffic."

"Yeah, probably," Jason said.

Freddie stepped forward and hugged his son. "Good luck here, Jason. I'm proud of you. And you know you can call home whenever you need to."

"Thanks," Jason grinned. He turned to his younger brother. "Good luck being the only son in the house now, Ty. Make sure you hold your ground, okay?"

"Okay!" Tyler said. "And I'll email you pictures from all my hockey games!"

"Well," Emma said, crossing her arms. "I guess it'll just be me and dad watching _Galaxy Wars _from now on."

"Nah, we'll still catch them when I'm home," Jason said, giving his little sister a hug.

"Yeah, and I guess I'll only have dad to threaten my boyfriends now," Ashton said, joining the hug.

"No, don't worry, I'll still find a way to threaten them," Jason grinned.

"Be safe, okay?" Freddie added. "We'll call when we get back home to see how you're getting settled."

"Got it," Jason nodded as he gave the family one last hug.

Freddie, Tyler and the twins all waved to Jason as they left the dorm room.

Sam stood at the doorframe. "Bye, sweetheart," she said, giving Jason one last fleeting smile. "I love you."

"Love you too, mom," Jason replied.

…

Having already sent one child off to college, Sam and Freddie weren't expecting it to be quite as hard to send the rest of them off as well. But when Emma and Ashton's turn came around, they were sad to say they were very wrong.

Neither of them had any doubts about Ashton. She was a straight A student, and while she was not exactly a born genius as Jason was, she got into every single college she applied to.

Emma, on the other hand, was a different story. She had never made the best grades, and struggled to maintain her average throughout high school. Freddie, and even sometimes Sam, would continually hound her about her performance, especially during her senior year of high school, but Emma would always fight back, claiming that school wasn't her thing.

But when the acceptance letters began coming out, Emma wasn't left empty handed. Quite the opposite, actually. While Emma may not have been the best student in the classroom, she was by far an extraordinary athlete, and her impressive track times got her on the radar of many colleges, who were willing to offer her full scholarships to get her to run for them.

"I can't believe how amazing this is," Freddie said, sliding into his and Sam's bed on the evening that the girls had received their acceptance letters from their first few schools. "Especially for Emma. I have to admit, I was starting to get scared about her."

"Hey, she's half-Puckett," Sam said. "And Puckett's always pull through."

"They're going to have to start looking into all the schools they got into," Freddie said. "And we should probably start booking tours for them to go on…where do you think they'll wind up choosing? I'm personally hoping for University of Washington. Not too far from home, but it's still a great school."

"Eh, I don't think Ashton like's their business department," Sam said. "And that's what she's studying, remember? I think she's leaning towards University of Southern California."

"But they have the weakest track team for Emma though," Freddie pointed out.

"Um, baby?" Sam said gently. "You do realize that Emma and Ashton don't _have _to go to the same college, right?"

"What?" Freddie frowned. "Why wouldn't they? They're twins!"

"Yeah, and they've shared a room for their entire lives," Sam said. "Don't you think that they may want to each do their own things?"

"I-I never really thought of that," Freddie admitted. "I just always assumed they would go off together."

"I know," Sam said. "But you know they each need to go where they want to."

"I know…" Freddie muttered.

"You okay?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," he sighed. "It's just…wow. We have to do this all over again. Twice this time too!"

"You thought it would be easier too, huh?" Sam said.

"It doesn't get easier, does it?" Freddie said, chuckling.

"Guess not," Sam said.

…..

After about a month, Emma and Ashton had both finally made their decisions of where they would attend college.

Ashton had decided to study at Berkley, where she was excited to begin studying accounting and enjoy the California atmosphere as well.

And Emma decided to take her track scholarship from University of Oregon, where incidentally, her boyfriend Quincy Gibson was also planning on attending.  
"You guys call when you get to your schools, got it?" Sam said as Freddie finished loading the last of the twins' luggage into their respective cars.

"We will," Ashton said.

"Maybe," Emma said.

"Emma…" Freddie said warningly.

"Okay, okay, I'll call."

"Drive safe," Sam said as she hugged each of her daughters. "We'll be up in a couple days to come help you get moved in. Ashton, if you need anything before then, you can always call Jason. And Emma, Oregon's not to far of a drive; we can be up sooner if you want us to."

"Yeah, we'll come right away if either of you need anything," Freddie said, hugging each of the girls.

"Don't worry, daddy. We'll be fine," Ashton assured him.

"Yeah, I know you will," Freddie smiled. "But you two should get going. I don't want you to be driving at night."

"Oh yeah…" Emma nodded.

The twins stared at each other for a moment. For the past year, all they could talk about had been how excited they were that they'd finally be on their own; no longer always being grouped together. But now had the moment had actually arrived, it seemed that they had just realized how close they had been for their whole lives, even though all the fighting, and that this would be the first time they would be apart.

"Come and visit me sometime?" Ashton asked Emma.

"Maybe if I decide I want to work on my tan," Emma smiled. "But there's supposed to be a huge mall by my school, so you know, if you ever want to go shopping…"

Ashton laughed as she threw her arms around her sister. "Bye, Em. We'll webchat as soon as we get to school, okay?"

"You better," Emma said, smiling.

As the twins got into their separate cars and pulled out of the driveway, Sam put her arm around Freddie's shoulder. "Hey. You doing okay?"

"My babies are gone now…" Freddie mumbled. "I thought it was hard when we had to say bye to Jason, but…_both _of my little girls going off in two different directions?"

"They're still your little girls," Sam told him.

"Yeah," Freddie sighed. "You remember when they were babies and I used to say I couldn't wait for them to get older because it was always so hard taking care of the two of them at the same time?"

"Hey, I said that too," Sam pointed out.

"You wish you could take that back as much as me?" Freddie mumbled.

"Oh yeah," Sam nodded.

…

And then when Tyler, the baby of the family, was getting ready to start his college journey, Sam and Freddie both knew that it would be the hardest. For once Tyler left, that would be it. They would have no kids left at home with them.

Tyler got okay grades at school, but like Emma, he made up for it with his athletic abilities; he was a star running back on the school's football team.

"You know, I can't believe _your _son is going to be playing for a college team," Gibby said as he helped Freddie load boxes into the Benson's car as they prepared to take their last college trip.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Freddie frowned.

"Dude come on, you're like, the least athletic person around," Gibby chuckled. "If anyone had come up to me and said that your son was going to be playing football at Arizona State University, I would've thrown ferret food at them."

"I'm athletic!" Freddie defended.

"What was the last sport you played?" Gibby asked.

"I-okay, fine, you've made your point," Freddie mumbled. "Just finish loading up the car for me, will you? I'm gonna go inside and see what's taking Sam so long."

Freddie headed into the house and saw Sam sitting on the couch.

"Hey, I thought you were helping Tyler pack up the last of his things," Freddie said.

"I did," Sam muttered.

"Oh," Freddie said. "Well where _is _Tyler?"

"He's on the phone saying goodbye to some friends," Sam replied.

"Okay, well we need to leave in ten minutes if we're going to try and avoid the traffic rush," Freddie said.

"Yeah, whatever," Sam sighed.

"You okay?" Freddie frowned.

"No!" Sam said. "This sucks!"

"What sucks?"

"How _dumb _are you?" Sam snapped. "Tyler going off to college!"

"Oh," Freddie sighed. "Yeah…it _is _rough. Our last one…"

"I can't believe we're finally out of kids," Sam said softly. "They're all grown up now…"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded sadly. "It just hit you, huh?"

"Yup," Sam said, showing a small smile. "I guess now it's just us…I mean, until one of them needs money or something."

"True," Freddie chuckled, putting his arm around his wife. "But you know what? I think we did a pretty good job with all of them. We managed to put four kids though college; that's no small achievement."

"I know," Sam said, resting her head on Freddie's shoulder. "But I still wish we hadn't finished with them so fast."

"Time really does fly, doesn't it?" Freddie said gently.

"Unfortunately," Sam said.

"But it was still a pretty great ride while it lasted, wasn't it?" Freddie pointed out.

Sam smiled up at him. "Yeah," she nodded. "The best."


	261. Chapter 261

**AN-Hey, I just started my summer vacation, so I'm hoping to have chapters up for all my stories a little quicker now! I have 22 more requests after this one, so again, if you sent in a request, it's going to take some time for me to get it up, but I WILL put it up. Also, feel free to send in more requests if you want; I love hearing ideas! Also, a few readers have suggested that I make a new set of oneshots about Sam and Freddie's kids. The only reason I don't think I'm going to do that is because it will just be too confusing, and it's a lot easier for me to just have all my oneshots in this one story. However I do get that a lot of the oneshots lately have been just focusing on the kids, and not so much Sam and Freddie. I just got a bunch of requests for those all at once, which is why there are so many of them. So what I'm thinking I'm going to do is from now on when I upload a chapter that's centered mainly around the kids, I'm going to post a second oneshot with it at the same time that's focused solely on Sam and Freddie. That way if you're not too big a fan of the kid chapters, you'll still have something to read that you'll hopefully enjoy, and if you do like the kid chapters, well then you just get two chapters per update! **

…**.**

_Update_

"-And then my mom decided that she would buy me these kakis," Gibby said, showing off his new pants at the Benson's dinner table. "Because they have better seams."

"Wow, I think that was probably the lamest story I've heard in my life," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

The kids at the table all laughed.

"Sam," Freddie sighed. He turned to the kids. "You guys all know that saying something 'lame' isn't nice, right _Sam_?"

"Um yeah, sure," Sam mumbled.

"So your mom seriously still buys your clothes for you?" Carly asked Gibby, frowning.

"Um, duh," Gibby nodded.

"Isn't it just the cutest thing?" Tasha said, smiling at her husband dreamily.

"Sure, if by cute you mean la-I mean, dumb," Sam said.

The kids giggled again.

"Mommy said dumb!" Sam and Freddie's five-year old daughter, Emma, grinned.

"Sam!" Freddie hissed.

"Oh come on, 'dumb' isn't a bad word!" Sam defended.

"Still, I don't think we should be exposing the kids to that type of language," Freddie said. "Especially not when Carly and Gibby's kids are here too!"

"Um, so how about I help clean up these plates?" Carly said, quickly getting to her feet. Years of practice had trained her how to diffuse a couple's fight between Sam and Freddie in a matter of seconds.

"Yeah, you do that and I'll get some ice cream for everyone," Sam said, heading into the kitchen.

Once Carly had cleared the table, Sam placed large bowls of chocolate swirl ice cream in front of everyone.

"So Gib, did you ever manage to replace your Pear Phone?" Carly asked as everyone dug into his or her desert. "I mean, it was pretty much destroyed after that little stunt of yours."

"Hey, that wasn't my fault!" Gibby defended. "It was the monkey's! But yes, the people at the Pear Store happened to be _very _understanding of my problem and they gave me a replacement."

"Hey, speaking of Pear Phones," Freddie said. "Who wants to see the new update I just installed onto my phone? I can download apps three times faster and-"

"No one wants to see your lame update, nub," Sam said, spooning ice cream into one-year old Tyler's mouth.

"What does lame mean?" Ashton asked.

"It means not cool, sweetie," Freddie said, glaring at Sam. "And mommy really should know better than to use those _hurtful _words."

"Hey Quincy, guess what?" Emma said to Gibby and Tasha's son. "You're lame!"

"I am not!" Quincy whined.

"Emma, we don't call people lame," Freddie said sternly.

"Mom calls you lame all the time though," Jason pointed out.

"Nice going, Sam," Freddie said.

"Oh calm down," Sam said. "Don't get your _Galaxy Wars _boxers in a knot."

…..

Later that evening, Sam was upstairs putting Tyler to bed while Freddie and the others sat in the living room, watching a movie.

"So, what did you do to tick Sam off so much?" Carly asked Freddie.

"Yeah, she seemed pretty wazzed off at you during dinner," Gibby nodded.

"Eh, she was just being Sam," Freddie sighed. "You know, flinging insults out at me like it's her job."

"Ah," Carly nodded.

"Hey, is that Tyler's baby monitor there on the coffee table?" Gibby asked.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, it is," Freddie nodded. "Sam must've left down here. I'd better run it back upstairs."

"Wait, wait, wait, hold on," Gibby said. "I hear something coming from it!"

"That's Sam," Carly nodded, listening to the noise coming from the baby monitor.

"Yeah, the other monitor's in Tyler's room," Freddie nodded. Suddenly a grin began to creep across his face.

"You gonna eavesdrop on what your wife is saying?" Gibby asked.

"Shoosh yeah I am," Freddie nodded.

"You know that's sort of, oh, what's the word? _Wrong_!" Carly spat.

"You don't have to listen," Freddie pointed out.

"Oh just move over," Carly said, sitting down next to the boys in front of the baby monitor.

…..

"Alright, Tyler," Sam said, pulling her son's pajama's over his head. "Time for you to go to bed."

Tyler happily cooed as Sam scooped him up off his changing table.

"Mom, where's my dinosaur book?" Jason asked, coming into his brother's nursery.

"Probably in your room where you had it last," Sam said. "Do you want to read it to Tyler again?"

"Uh-huh," Jason nodded.

"Mommy, Emma keeps sticking her tongue out at me and calling me lame!" Ashton complained, rushing into the room with Emma at her heels.

"Both of you are lame," Jason said.

"You're lamer!" Ashton snapped back.

"Hey, I don't want to hear any of you calling each other lame again, got it?" Sam said firmly.

"But you say it," Emma said.

"Well when you become a grown up you can say it all you like," Sam said.

"But you kept calling dad lame downstairs tonight," Jason said. "If you can do it why can't we?"

"Er…" Sam frowned.

"Mommy?" Ashton said. "Why do you call daddy lame?"

"Because daddy…he sort of is…well, he's actually-um…don't you guys have other things to be doing?"

"Mommy," Emma said. "Why do you call daddy lame even though daddy said it's not a nice word?"

"Yeah," Jason nodded.

"What is this, twenty questions?" Sam mumbled, sitting down in the rocking chair with Tyler.

"I thought mommies and daddies were to supposed to be nice to each other all the time because they love each other," Ashton said.

"Hey, I'm nice to daddy…occasionally," Sam said.

"Do you love him?" Emma asked.

Sam showed a small smile. "Okay you three…what you're going to hear right now _never _leaves this room, got it? Can we keep this our little secret?"

The kids eagerly nodded.

"Well then," Sam said. "Yes. I love daddy. Very, _very _much. No matter how many times I laugh at him, or call him names, I still love him. I don't think I could go one day without having him around me, or kissing him, or having him hold me. Which is _why _I have to give him suck a hard time; because if he _knew _that, he'd get a pretty swollen ego, and I don't want to deal with that."

"Gross," Ashton cringed. "You _like _kissing daddy?"

"Yuck!" Emma and Jason exclaimed.

Sam chuckled. "Hey, you guys asked."

…..

After Sam got Tyler down, she headed back downstairs into the living room where Freddie, Gibby and Carly were all staring at her with big smirks on their faces.

"What?" Sam frowned, sitting down.

"You _love _me," Freddie said happily, grinning at his wife.

"What?" Sam said, narrowing her eyes.

"You love me," Freddie said again.

"Okay…and you keep saying this _because_?" Sam asked.

"Sam," Freddie chuckled. "It's okay. I mean, just because you can't go a day without having me around you-"

"What did you say?" Sam growled, getting to her feet, her face turning bright red. "How did you-Hey! Is that Tyler's baby monitor? Did you- You were _listening _to me up there?"

"Um, well, I think we'd better go," Carly said as her and Gibby jumped to their feet.

"Um…yeah?" Freddie said, his grin finally fading. "But-But-"

"You-You-_lame_ nub!" Sam snapped, grabbing a cushion from her seat and throwing it at her husband. "I can't believe you! I am going to _kill _you!"

"What why? Because I caught you admitting to our kids how much you love me?" Freddie chuckled.

"Ugh! Shut _up_!" Sam snapped.

"What's the big deal?" Freddie asked, amused. "I tell you I love you all the time!"

"Yeah, because you're the weak emotional one in this relationship," Sam said.

"True," Freddie said, leaning down to give Sam a kiss. "Which is why when you _do _admit that you love me, it's really special."

"You know I just don't like _saying _it," Sam mumbled.

"I know baby," Freddie grinned. "And hey, I love you too."

"Yeah, yeah," Sam said rolling her eyes. "I'm still mad at you though, by the way."

"Of course you are," Freddie said, shaking his head.


	262. Chapter 262

_Reader_

"Hey, you guys, guess what?" Carly Shay asked her two best friends as she let themselves into their house.

"Um, is this important?" Sam asked as she pulled away from her husband.

"Sort of, why?" Carly asked.

"Just because this is the first time in like, forever, that all the kids have been out of the house at the same time," Freddie replied. "So we were going to have some, you know, alone time."

"Oh okay good, so I'm not interrupting anything important then," Carly said happily.

"You'd _really _think she'd understand these things by now," Sam grumbled.

"What's up, Carls?" Freddie sighed.

"Well I was going through my emails today-"

"You interrupted us for an _email_?" Sam exclaimed.

"Not just any email," Carly grinned, pulling out her phone. "It's from some dude named Joseph Fender."

"We don't know any Joseph Fender," Freddie pointed out.

"Yeah, but he knows _us_," Carly said. She cleared her throat and began to read the email.

"Hi Carly. My name is Joseph Fender, and I am in the web design business. When I was younger, I used to be a huge fan of the web show that you did with Sam and Freddie, iCarly. I wasn't very popular when I was younger, so your show was one of the few things I really looked forward to. When you guys ended the show twenty years ago, I was devastated, and didn't know what I was going to do now that iCarly had ended. But what I didn't realize at the time was that your show ending was just the push I needed to really make something of my life. Your show gave me the strength I needed to apply to college and get a job doing what I loved. I just wanted to say thank you to you guys for doing iCarly for as long as you did. You have no idea how many people like me you've inspired because of it. Every now and then I still find myself going through old clips of the show, and it never fails to pick me up when I need it. Hope the three of you are doing well in whatever you are up to now."

"Wow, that's pretty cool," Freddie said.

"If you ask me, this Joseph guy sounds like a real loser," Sam said.

"Sam!" Carly frowned.

"What?"

"Man, I would've never though our web show would've had such an effect on people," Freddie said. "You know, I haven't thought about iCarly in years…"

"Me neither," Carly admitted. "I guess we've all just been to busy. Has it _really _been twenty years since we've done it?"

"Just about," Sam nodded. "Doesn't feel like that long, does it?"

"No," Freddie replied.

The three sighed.

"You know…" Freddie said thoughtfully. "I think we have that big box of old iCarly props in the attic somewhere…"

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Sam asked.

"Want to spend the rest of the day reminiscing about the good old days?" Carly asked.

"Shoosh yeah," Sam said as her and Freddie jumped up and headed to the attic.

…

"What are we looking for again?" Sam and Freddie's seventeen-year old son, Jason, asked as he climbed the staircase up into the Benson's attic.

"I'm telling you, I heard mom and dad saying just the other night that they hid our Christmas presents up here," Jason's thirteen-year old sister, Emma, said as her, Ashton, Tyler and Carly's daughter, Clarissa, followed Jason up.

"You guys really still peek at your Christmas presents?" Clarissa frowned. "Don't you like the surprise of not knowing what you're getting until Christmas morning?"

"We do," Ashton nodded. "But you know how there's always that one present from your parents where you don't know _what _they were thinking when they bought it for you?"

"Last year dad bought me a book," Tyler said. "A _book_! What am I going to do with that? I'm not a reader!"

"Anyway," Emma explained. "What we figured out was that if we caught the lame presents early on, and then dropped subtle hints to our parents for the next few weeks, they'd realize that we'd probably like something else instead."

"That's genius," Clarissa said, amazed.

"I don't see any of the presents up here," Jason said, looking around the attic. "You sure they're up here, Emma?"

"Yes, mom was telling dad that she was storing everything up here this year," Emma said.

"Unless she was just baiting us…" Ashton mumbled. "Which with mom, is a real possibility."

"Maybe they're in this big box," Tyler said, opening up a box that was siting in the middle of the attic. "Wait, no, this is just some weird junk. Whoa, look at this!" He held up Sam's old blue remote and pushed a button.

"_Random Dancing" _echoed throughout the basement.

"Shh!" Jason hissed. "Do you _want _to get caught?"

"Sorry," Tyler muttered.

"What is that stuff anyway?" Clarissa asked.

"The side of the box says 'iCarly props'," Ashton read.

"Hey, isn't that web show our parents used to do when they were younger?" Emma asked.

"Yeah, it was," Jason nodded. "They must've kept some things from it. What else is in there, Ty?"

"Um, let's see," Tyler said, digging through the box. "There's this cool looking fake mustache, this shirt that says 'Fried Clown' on it, a doll with the face cut out of it, a-ew! A bra!"

"I wonder what they used half this stuff for," Ashton said, rifling through the box.

"Yeah, they must've done some pretty weird stuff with this shiz," Jason agreed.

"Hey look, it's a picture of dad dressed up like some lame vampire or something," Emma said, grinning as she picked out an old picture from the box, her mind no longer focused on snooping out Christmas presents. "Oh God, he looked ridiculous."

"Have you guys ever seen the show?" Clarissa asked, sitting down around the box next to Emma.

The Benson kids shook their heads.

"Nah, our parents just told us a few things about it," Jason said. "Like how they got some award for it in Japan or how some psycho chick locked them in a basement during it."

"What are you guys doing up here?" Sam asked suddenly, flicking on the lights as she entered the attic with Carly and Freddie.

"Um, we were just-" Emma started.

"See, I told you'd they fall for that trap," Sam said triumphantly to Freddie. She shook her head. "You guys honestly think I'd be so stupid as to hide your Christmas presents up _here_?"

"Hey, you guys going through our old iCarly props?" Carly asked, spotting the box.

"Yeah, we just found them up here," Tyler nodded.

"We were looking at them earlier today," Freddie explained. "There's some pretty neat stuff in there, huh?"

"Yeah, what'd you guys use this blue butt mold for?" Emma asked.

"For a blue butt bit," Sam replied.

"Why'd you guys ever stop doing iCarly?" Clarissa asked.

"Well you know, once we finished high school, we sort of had too much going on," Carly shrugged. "We never meant for the show to last forever."

"Was it fun though?" Tyler asked.

"Of course," Sam nodded.

"Was it _really _as popular as you guys all say it was?" Jason asked.

"Um, popular enough to have over a million views per show," Freddie scoffed.

"Whoa!" Ashton said, impressed.

"Hey, I have an idea," Carly said, looking over at Sam and Freddie. "Why don't we show these guys just how great the show was. You think you can pull up the site again, Freddie?"

"So long as the password is still 'Samlovesham'," Freddie chuckled.

"Then come on, let's go watch," Sam said. "And you guys can all see what a big nub this one used to be…not that he still isn't one." She playfully put her arm around Freddie.

"Hey!" Freddie said indignantly.

"Don't worry mom, we found this in the box," Emma grinned, showing her mom the picture of Freddie in his vampire get up. "We know."

"Oh come on, I looked awesome in that!" Freddie said.

"Yeah, not really," Sam laughed.

"Come on, I want to watch!" Tyler said anxiously as he jumped up. "Hurry up!"

"Okay, okay, hold you horses," Freddie grinned.

"This is so exciting," Carly said. "I can't believe we haven't shown these guys iCarly before!"

"Yeah well, better late then never," Sam shrugged.


	263. Chapter 263

_Turnip_

"I wonder where Carly and Spencer are," Sam yawned, her head resting on her boyfriend, Freddie's, shoulder.

"I know, they've been at their dad's friend's house for hours," Freddie nodded.

"Oh well," Sam shrugged.

"Yup," Freddie said, smiling down at her. "But more time for us to do this." He leaned down and planted a kiss on her lips, which she gladly returned.

Just then there was a loud clash of thunder.

"Man, it's really pouring out there," Sam commented, pulling away.

"It's supposed to be like this for the rest of the day," Freddie said. "I hope my mom will be able to get home from work alright. Otherwise she's going to have to stay overnight at the nurse's lounge."

"Gee, wouldn't that be a real tragedy," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Ha, ha," Freddie said as Sam's phone dinged.

"Carly just texted me," Sam said, looking down at her screen. "The roads are starting to get flooded so her and Spencer are just going to crash at their dad's friend's place."

"Whoa, she's right," Freddie said, getting up and looking out the windows of the Shay's apartment. "You can barely _see_ the streets under all that water!"

"Which means that it looks like I'm not going to be getting home," Sam said. "Well, that's a good excuse for me to crash over here. My mom's been home all week using this new sewing machine her boyfriend got her to sew her own bikinis."

Freddie shuddered. "Who in their right mind would give your mom a way to get _more _bikinis?"

"Who knows," Sam said, shaking her head. "Anyway, I'm hungry. I'm guessing I can't get a pizza delivered in this?"

"Baby, unless you can find someone willing to swim it over, looks like you're out of luck," Freddie said. "But my mom has some baked turnip casserole over at our place. I can get you some of that if you want?"

"I don't think I'll ever be _that _hungry," Sam said.

"It's pretty good," Freddie defended. "But if you're sure, try and find something here. I'll run across the hall and get myself some of –aw man!"

"What?" Sam frowned.

"I left my key on my dresser this morning," Freddie explained. "And since it doesn't look like my mom's going to be back anytime soon, I'm locked out."

"Aw, poor Frednub," Sam teased.

"That just means you're stuck with me here," Freddie said playfully.

"Eh, I guess I can deal with that," Sam grinned as she wrapped her arms around his neck as she kissed him.

As the storm raged on outside, the power in Bushwell Plaza eventually went out, so Sam and Freddie gathered as many candles they could find.

"I'm surprised Carly actually keeps this many candles around this place, considering Spencer's track record with fire," Freddie commented as he lit the last of the candles on the coffee table.

"That dude could set anything on fire," Sam said, yawning.

"You tired?" Freddie asked as the couple settled down onto the couch.

"A little," Sam nodded.

"Me too," Freddie said. "So why don't we get some sleep. We can make a little bed out of those pillows over there."

"That sounds like effort, you can do that, Benson," Sam said, tossing her boyfriend some of the pillows.

Freddie shook his head in amusement as he began to pile up the pillows. In a few minutes he had created a sort of makeshift bed for him and Sam.

"Not bad," Sam commented as she lay down.

"Well when your mom makes you play with pillows instead of blocks as a kid, you get pretty good at this sort of thing," Freddie said, laying down next to Sam and covering the both of them with a blanket.

"That's really pathetic, baby," Sam commented sleepily as Freddie wrapped his arms around her, giving her a long kiss.

"I love you," Freddie whispered in her ear.

"I love you too," Sam said, snuggling closer to him. "Hey, you realize this is our first sleepover?"

"I guess it is," Freddie smiled.

Sam rolled over so she was facing him. "I guess both of us getting stranded here worked out pretty nicely for us, huh?"

"I'd say," Freddie nodded. He kissed Sam gently on her lips. "Night baby."

"Night nub," Sam yawned as her eyes closed.


	264. Chapter 264

_Liver_

"-And then I went to the bank," Spencer told Freddie as he continued to polish his kitchen counter. "And it turns out I have eight more dollars in my bank account than I thought. And then I stopped off at Pink Bunny for some fro-yo, and found a quarter that I swear-"

"Um, Spence, that's nice and everything, but I just stopped by to see if you had a can opener me and my mom could borrow," Freddie said.

"Oh," Spencer said, his face dropping. "Yeah sure. Here."

"You alright?" Freddie frowned as he took the can opener.

"It's just, I've been so _lonely _since Carly moved to Italy," Spencer said. "Maybe I should've tried harder that time you guys tried to find me adult friends."

"Hey, why don't you come over and have dinner with me and my mom tonight?" Freddie suggested. "She's cooking lamb liver."

Spencer looked at him. "I'm not _that _lonely."

"Yeah," Freddie sighed. "But hasn't Sam been over here lately? You can hang out with her?"

"She hasn't been over here all week," Spencer said. "The last time she was over here was that night after the Air Force dance when-"

"Carly left," Freddie finished. "Yeah. She's been pretty distant with me and Gib too."

"You mean you haven't talked to her at school?" Spencer asked.

"I do," Freddie said. "A little. But she's just going through a hard time I think. I mean her best friend literally got up and left the country in a matter of like, five hours."

"Yeah, that's pretty tough," Spencer agreed. "Just keep an eye on her. And tell her my fridge is always open if she wants to stop by."

Freddie chuckled. "Don't worry, I will."

…..

"Man, being a ferret owner is a lot of work," Gibby said as him and Freddie sipped their smoothies at the Groovy Smoothie. "I had to wake up three times last night to massage his whiskers."

"Is that really necessary?" Freddie asked.

"Only if you want your ferret to feel secure about himself," Gibby said.

"Either of you dudes want to buy some wraps?" T-Bo asked, coming over to the table with a stick of wraps.

"Sure, I'd bet Weasel would like those," Gibby said, handing T-Bo some bills.

"Now here's a good customer," T-Bo said approvingly. He turned to Freddie. "And what do you give me?"

"Um, my mom gives you a roof over your head," Freddie said.

"Dude, your mom's crazy," Gibby said.

"Yeah, you know what she tried to get me to do this morning?" T-Bo asked. "She wanted me to help her spread this weird anti-bacterial gunk on her feet! T-Bo don't touch feet!"

"She's worried she's going to catch some weird foot disease that she read about on ," Freddie explained. He pulled out his wallet. "Anyway Teebs, can you get me a large lime-berry splat to go?"

"You're getting another smoothie?" Gibby asked. "You didn't even finish your tiny medium one."

"Nah, it's not for me," Freddie said as T-Bo went to go get his order. "It's for Sam. I was thinking of swinging by her house with it, you know, since she's been kind of down since Carly left for Italy."

"Ohhh…" Gibby said, grinning knowingly. "You're going to _bring her a smoothie_."

"Um, yeah," Freddie frowned. "Is there a problem with that?"

"No problem," Gibby said, still grinning. "It just took you a long time to bring that smoothie to her though, didn't it?"

"I think that ferret's starting to make you loopy Gib," Freddie said, shaking his head. "Because you're not making _any _sense right now."

"Here you go, one large lime-berry splat," T-Bo said, setting the beverage down in front of Freddie. "That's five seventy-four."

"Hey Teebs, guess what?" Gibby said. "Freddie's going over to Sam's house to give her that smoothie."

"Ha! Really?" T-Bo exclaimed. "Alright Fred-O! Way to go!"

"Am I missing something?" Freddie said, frustrated.

"Oh come on," T-Bo said. "There are two reasons why a dude brings a girl a smoothie. Either he accidently sold Asthma inhaler on the Internet, or he's trying to get back together with her."

"Okay, you two are nuts," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "I'm just going over to make sure Sam's okay. We are _friends_, you know."

"Okay," Gibby said, exchanging looks with T-Bo.

"Oh just go play with your ferret!" Freddie snapped as he got to his feet and stormed out of the shop.

….

Freddie walked up Sam's driveway with her smoothie in hand and knocked on the door.

_Gibby and T-Bo are just being idiots_, he thought to himself as he waited on the front porch. He wasn't interested in getting back in Sam! Okay, sure, he _had _just brought up the subject to her a week ago, but he hadn't really meant it! Had he? No! He shook his head. He didn't want to get back with Sam. He was just over here as a _friend _to make sure she was okay. That was all. Nothing more. Nope. He wasn't at all interested in-

"Hey, what are you doing here?" Sam asked, opening the door, wearing a stunning purple dress. Freddie recognized it as the dress she wore on their first official date to Pini's.

"I-um, I-" Freddie stuttered, trying hard not stare at Sam. "I brought you over a smoothie, you know, to make sure you were okay. You've seemed pretty out of it since Carly moved to Italy."

"Oh, well thanks," Sam said, taking the smoothie from him. She took a sip of it. "So," she said in a softer voice. "Have you talked to Carly?"

"A little over text message," Freddie nodded.

"Has she told you about all the new friends she's making over in Italy?" Sam asked sadly.

"Well, no," Freddie admitted. "But I'm sure she misses America a lot still, and-"

"Let's see," Sam said. "There's Alexandria, who took her sunglasses shopping yesterday. And then there's Emily, who has her same taste in fashion. And Camille, whose house she's sleeping over at tonight. And then there's Danielle, who offered to show her around Florence with even _more _friends."

"Sam," Freddie said. "She's not replacing you. She's going to be in Italy for a while. You can't expect her to stay in the whole time like a hermit and-"

"Oh, and here's the part _you'll _care about," Sam said bitterly. "Apparently she's getting real chummy with some guy named Antonio who took her out for gelato a couple nights ago."

"Why would I care about that?" Freddie asked, confused.

Sam shrugged. "Never mind," she mumbled, sipping her smoothie.

"So, um," Freddie said. "Why are you all dressed up?"

"Oh," Sam said, her cheeks blushing a bit. "I-I was just going to head out…"

"Out where?" Freddie asked.

"Hey, who was at the door?" came a male voice from inside the house, and then a second later a tall guy appeared next to Sam.

"Oh awesome, a smoothie," he said, taking Sam's beverage out of her hand.

"Jonah?" Freddie exclaimed in disbelief, recognizing the boy.

"'Sup dude?" Jonah nodded over at him. He turned to Sam. "You ready to go babe? I want to be out of the restaurant by nine so I can get home in time to catch that new _Stimpy the Monkey _movie."

"Um, yeah, could-could you just go get my purse for me?" Sam asked.

"Whatever," Jonah shrugged.

"Are you guys back together?" Freddie asked the second Jonah disappeared. "Since when?"

"Three days ago," Sam said.

"But Sam," Freddie said, still blown away by this discovery. "Have you forgotten _why _you two broke up the first time? He _cheated _on you! He tried to get with Carly while he was seeing you!"

"Yeah well, he can't really do that anymore, can he?" Sam pointed out. "Besides, that was almost five years ago. He's changed."

"Sam, I think this is a mistake," Freddie said. "I don't have a good feeling about this guy."

"Look," Sam said, lowering her voice. "Without Carly here, what else do I have going for me? If I'm going to be miserable without my best friend here, I might as well have a boyfriend, right?"

"Sam, that's-" Freddie started.

"Thanks for the smoothie," Sam cut him off. "I'll see you at school."

"Sam-" Freddie started, but Sam had already shut the door.

…

"Can you believe this?" Freddie said angrily to Spencer and Gibby as he paced back and forth in Spencer's living room. "They're back together! They're back together!"

"I can't believe you called us here at two in the morning," Gibby yawned.

"I couldn't sleep, okay?" Freddie snapped.

"Are you positive they're back together?" Spencer asked.

"She's the one who told me!" Freddie said. "I told you, I went over to her house to give her a smoothie and there he was!"

"Whoa, you were bringing her a smoothie?" Spencer asked. "Alright! I knew you still had feelings for her!"

"Bringing your ex-girlfriend a smoothie does _not _mean you still have feelings for her!" Freddie said, exasperated.

"Well then did you sell her Asthma inhaler online?" Spencer asked.

Freddie let out a groan of frustration.

"I don't think I even remember Sam going out with this Jonah guy," Gibby commented.

"It was back in eighth grade, before you were really a relevant member of our group," Freddie explained. "You were just some random kid that showed up every now and then to take his shirt off."

Gibby gave an indignant gasp. "Well. Glad to know where I stand with you!"

"Hang on," Spencer said. "This isn't the kid who wrecked my Claymation video, is it?"

"The same," Freddie nodded.

"That scutter!" Spencer exclaimed.

"He's also the one who totally tried to cheat on Sam with Carly," Freddie continued. "Which is why this is such a mistake! Once a cheater, always a cheater, if you ask me. He's just going to wind up hurting Sam again, which is why she should be back together with him!"

"Well, that and because you still like her," Gibby said.

"Dude-" Freddie started, but he was cut off as the computer on the kitchen counter top began to beep, and a chat window appeared on the screen.

"Hey, is that Carly calling?" Spencer asked.

"Yup," Freddie nodded, hurrying over to the computer. "I asked her to web chat us so I could fill her in on this disaster." He clicked the accept button on the chat window and Carly's face appeared on the screen.

"Hey you guys!" Carly smiled at her friends and brother. "How's Seattle?"

"Not as cool as Italy, I bet," Spencer replied. "How you doing, kid?"

"I'm good," Carly smiled. "I actually just got home from school. My new friend Stephania is coming over later to try and help me learn a few phrases in Italian."

"That's great Carls," Freddie said quickly. "But we've got some serious chiz on out hands."

"What's wrong?" Carly frowned. "Is everyone okay?"

"Not really," Freddie said. "Sam's back together with _Jonah_."

"Jonah?" Carly repeated, her eyes widening. "The same Jonah who cheated on her?"

"Uh-huh," Freddie nodded.

"But-But why?" Carly said. "I mean, the last time we talked, she _did _mention a guy, but-but I was too busy telling her all about my first gondola ride to really question it too much. Oh man, I'm such a bad friend! I should've tried to talk her out of this; she's going to get hurt all over again and I'm not even going to be there to comfort her, and-"

"Carly, relax," Freddie said. "This isn't your fault. Sam's just…I don't know what she's doing. She really misses you, and I think-I think she figures that maybe if she has a boyfriend, she won't feel so lonely."

"But she shouldn't be feeling lonely!" Carly said. "She has you guys!"

"Yeah, Freddie even brought her a smoothie," Gibby added.

"Like, to her house?" Carly asked. "Oh! I _knew _you still had feelings for her, Freddie!"

"For the tenth time-Oh, forget it," Freddie said. "Look, I _know _Jonah hasn't changed. That guy's still a class-A jerk. I don't like the idea of him getting so close to Sam."

"Well, maybe Carly could talk to her," Spencer suggested.

"No," Carly sighed. "That wouldn't work…whenever a girl tells another girl not to go after a guy, even if it's her best friend, that usually only makes her go after him more."

"Well we have to do something!" Freddie said loudly, pounding his fist on the counter. "I can't believe she would so something this _stupid_!"

"Hey, I'm sure she's just upset," Spencer frowned.

"But out of all the guys she could've picked to be her little sympathy boyfriend, she picks _Jonah_?" Freddie cried. "She just _had _to pick the worst guy for her? What about Brad? What about that Pete guy? What about _me_?"

"Freddie?" Carly said gently.

"Maybe I'll try talking to her again tomorrow," Freddie sighed, ignoring Carly, because he knew what she had been getting ready to say.

"That's a good idea," Spencer nodded. "This is probably just a fling or something. She's just feeling lonely without Carly and isn't thinking straight. That's all."

"I hope so," Carly said. "And you guys let me know what happens! I have to go now, but just because I'm in Italy doesn't mean I don't want to be kept in the loop!"

….

The next morning Freddie headed over to Sam's house again and knocked on her door.

"Dude, it's ten on a Saturday morning," Sam mumbled as she opened the door for him, still wearing her pajamas.

"Oh, out late last night with _Jonah _were you?" Freddie said coldly.

"What do you want?" Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"To find out what's _wrong _with you!" Freddie said.

"Well other then me being annoyed about being woken up so early, _nothing's _wrong with me," Sam said. "So if you don't mind-"

"No, Sam," Freddie said, grabbing the door before Sam could shut it in his face. "You're not fine. You're going out with _Jonah _again! Jonah! He was a total jerk to you the first time you guys went out. And ever since then, he's cheated on every single other girl he's dated. I know that you feel upset and depressed now that Carly's in Italy, but you _do _have other friends that are here for you, you know? Gibby, Spencer, T-Bo, _me_. You don't need some loser boyfriend who doesn't even care enough about you to treat you right!"

"Why do you even care who I date?" Sam said.

"Because I care about _you_!" Freddie exclaimed. "A lot! And I don't want to see you with someone who doesn't deserve you! You're making a huge mistake! And I know you're probably going to wind up getting mad at me now for trying to talk you out of this, but I just can't sit by and let you do this!"

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Well, I probably _would _be getting mad at you right now…if you weren't right."

"Huh?" Freddie frowned.

"About Jonah," Sam mumbled. "Took him a whole three days to start cheating on me this time. He went for some chick at that copy store this time around. And get this, he said I should be _cool _with it, because I was lucky to even be one of the girls on his radar."

"Are you serious?" Freddie said. "What a-a-"

"I used the word wazznut," Sam said, showing a small smile.

"He's a big one," Freddie agreed. "But um, are-are you okay?"

"Yeah," Sam sighed. "I mean, I knew what type of guy Jonah was…it didn't come as too big a shock."

"But if you knew he would do something like this," Freddie said, running his fingers through his hair, confused. "Why would you date him?"

Sam shrugged. "I dunno…I guess when Carly left, I didn't want to keep being sad about my best friend leaving me and making all these new friends in Italy. So then I forced myself to think about the one thing that I always bothered me about Carly."

"Which was?" Freddie asked.

"The fact that she gets _all _the guys at school," Sam said. "As much as I love Carly, it gets annoying just being the _friend _of the girl who boys through themselves at. I thought that maybe…maybe since Carly wasn't here, I could finally do the one thing I could never do when she _was_ here."

"Sam," Freddie said gently. "You were _never _second to Carly with guys at school."

"Don't try and sugarcoat it, Benson," Sam said. "I was. But, you know, whatever. It's fine. I'm sure now that Carly's gone some new chick will come along and be the guy magnet at school and I can just go back to being the scary tough chick who people call when they need a second in a fight or something. I mean, that's why _you _preferred Carly isn't it? Because she was more normal than me?"

She said it so simply, and Freddie felt that was what made the impact of those words hurt so much.

"I never preferred Carly over you," Freddie said earnestly.  
"Is that why you kissed her?" Sam said. "Right before she left…right _after_ you asked me if I wanted to get back together?"

"I-um-" Freddie stammered.

"Relax," Sam said. "I think we both know that Carly's always going to be more 'normal' than me. So what's the big deal?"

"The big deal, Sam," Freddie said firmly. "Is that I _don't _prefer Carly over you. I love Carly, yeah, but that's because she's one of my best friends! You are too, but… when I told you I loved you…that night…I meant it. I meant it in a completely different way than how I feel about Carly."

Sam looked up at him. "So what are you saying?"

Freddie sighed and sat down next to her. "Sam…you have no idea how amazing you are. And the reason it kills me to see you throw all that away on some idiot like Jonah is because…" He took a deep breath and moved closer to her and pressed his lips to her.

When the two broke apart, Sam looked at Freddie, a mixture of confusion and happiness etched on her face. "Um…so about that phone call last week…?"

"You mean the one where I asked you if I wanted to get back together?" Freddie asked.

"Uh-huh," Sam nodded.

"Well, I think you know my answer," Freddie said. "What about you?"

Sam smirked and leaned back up to kiss him. "There," she said. "That's my answer."

…

**AN-Shoutouts to anybody who knows what show the reference is from!**


	265. Chapter 265

_Geography_

"Sam, I thought you said you were going to study," Carly frowned, looking up from her textbook. "Our geography test is in two days!"

"Geography's boring," Sam said simply from her beanbag chair in the iCarly studio.

"Sam, you promised me you were going to try and bring your grade up in that class," Freddie said from his own beanbag chair next to her. "You're so close to the B in that class…it would be stupid to throw away all your hard work now by not studying for this test."

"Yeah, listen to your boyfriend," Carly said.

"Ugh, fine," Sam groaned, reaching for her textbook.

"Thank you, baby," Freddie smiled at her.

"Yeah, yeah," Sam mumbled.

Just then Freddie's phone beeped, and he pulled it out of his pocket to read his text message.

"Well, I'm gonna have to get going," Freddie said, getting to his feet. He leaned down to give Sam a quick kiss. "Later!"

"Where are you going?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, I thought you were going to edit our new SuperBra bit?" Carly nodded.

"Um…I have to pick up some non-dairy cheese for my mom," Freddie said. "Because she really wants to make macaroni and cheese, but she doesn't want all the fat that's usually in dairy cheese…so I have to go to this special cheese store and get her the cheese and whatnot…bye!"

"They have special cheese stores?" Carly said as Freddie ran out of the studio. "Wow, you think they sell gift cards? I still need a birthday present for Spencer."

"Maybe," Sam said, frowning. "Hey, isn't this like, the third time this week the nub's run out on us like this for some lame errand or something?"

"I dunno, why?" Carly shrugged.

"Yeah, it is," Sam said thoughtfully. "Yesterday he left our iCarly rehearsal ten minutes early because he said he needed to go buy shoelaces from his shoelace guy, and on Monday he didn't meet us after school because of some mysterious chiropractor appointment."

"Huh, that is kind of weird," Carly admitted. "What kind of dude has a shoelace guy?"

"Carly! There is no shoelace guy!" Sam said, getting up and pacing back and forth in front of Freddie's tech cart. "Not even he's that lame! And he's a terrible liar, in case you haven't realized. He's doing something…something he doesn't want you or me to know about."

"Sam, you're being ridiculous," Carly laughed, rolling her eyes. "What would Freddie being doing?"

"I don't know…" Sam said slowly. She looked over at the tech cart. "Hey…he left his laptop here."

"Oh no," Carly said, standing up. "You are _not _about to snoop through your boyfriend's computer."

"Oh come on, what girlfriend doesn't snoop through her boyfriends stuff?" Sam said as she opened up Freddie's laptop. "You're the one who spent three hours looking up every possible thing about that Shawn guy you were dating last month."

"That was different," Carly said as she looked over Sam's shoulder. "Besides, do you even know Freddie's password?"

"Yup, it's Skynaught Benson," Sam said, rolling her eyes as she typed in the password.

"What are you even looking for?" Carly asked.

"I don't know," Carly said. "But the nub's a tech freak; he's got to have _something _on here about why he's been acting so weird lately…maybe on his email."

"Sam, I really think this is unnecessary," Carly said. "I don't know what you think you're going to find, but-"

"Hey, who's Carmen Butler?" Sam frowned.

"Who?"

"He has about fifty emails from some chick named Carmen Butler," Sam replied.

"Well if you're already on his email account, why don't you just _read _the emails already?" Carly sighed.

"I can't," Sam said. "The nub's got his email account locked so that you need another password to actually read the emails. Right now all I can see are the people he's sent emails to and received them from."

"You don't know this password?" Carly asked.

"No," Sam mumbled. "But seriously, who's this Carmen chick?"

"I dunno, probably just a friend or something," Carly said. "Hey, what are you doing?"

"I'm gonna try and find her on Splashface," Sam replied. "Let's see…whoa, is _that _her?"

She pulled up a Splashface profile of a very attractive teenage girl with long dark hair and perfectly tanned skin.

"Um, maybe that's a _different _Carmen Butler," Carly suggested.

"It says I have one mutual friend with her," Sam said. "Who happens to be…yup. Freddie Benson."

"Okay, but like I said, she's probably just a friend of his or something," Carly suggested. "Look, if this is going to bother you so much, why don't you just talk to Freddie about it?"

"Yeah…" Sam said thoughtfully. "I guess when I see him tonight, I'll just-hey! Look at this! It says that this chick just checked into Romana Bistro with _Freddie Benson_!"

"Huh?" Carly frowned. "Okay, Sam, I know that's sort of a weird place to take a friend, but-"

"Carly, that's like the most romantic restaurant in the entire state of Washington!" Carly said. "I don't think they even let you _into _that place if you're not coupled up!"

"Well maybe-"

"Hang on," Sam said, scrolling through Carmen's profile. "It says here that yesterday her and Freddie checked in at that overpriced flower shop on the other side of Seattle, and on Monday her and Freddie were at that gourmet chocolate place!"

"No way," Carly said. "That can't be right."

"It is," Sam said. "And look. They were at these places during the times when Freddie claimed he had all those stupid errands to run!"

She slammed his laptop shut.

"Sam-" Carly started.

"I guess it was only a matter of time, huh?" Sam said in a soft voice, falling back on one of the beanbag chairs. "I guess it's the same for every guy I date…eventually I just drive them all away to some other girl."

"Freddie's not cheating on you, Sam!" Carly said firmly.

"Oh come on, Carly!" Sam exclaimed. "Why else would he be at all these romantic places with this Carmen girl who, lets admit it, is way hotter than me?"

"I-I don't know," Carly said gently. "But I do know that Freddie _loves_ you."

"Yeah, well I thought so too," Sam sighed. "But I should probably know better by now…I mean, Jonah cheated on me. Pete cheated on me. And now Freddie is. It must be me…"

"Oh, Sam," Carly said, putting her arms around her best friend. "It's not you. And-And I'm sure there's some reasonable explanation to all this-"

"I should get going," Sam said, cutting Carly off. "Got to, um, help my mom with…something."

"Okay," Carly nodded, understanding that Sam wanted to be alone right now. "Call me if you need anything. I don't care what time it is."

"Thanks," Sam mumbled. "And um, don't-don't mention this to Freddie, will you?"

"But-"

"Carly…"

"I-Okay," Carly sighed. "I won't mention it."

…

Later that evening, Carly was sitting downstairs on the couch, watching some movie but not really paying attention to it.

How could Freddie be cheating on Sam? As much as she had tried to convince Sam that that wasn't the case, she honestly could not come up with any better explanation. This news shocked her. Freddie Benson was probably the nicest boy she knew, and after all the jerks that Sam had dated, she couldn't think of anyone more deserving of Freddie than her best friend. She couldn't believe that Freddie would go and do this…

"Knock, knock," Freddie said cheerfully, letting himself into the apartment.

"What do _you _want?" Carly asked coldly.

"Um, I was just stopping by," Freddie said. "Oh is that the movie about the guy who finds the magic laptop?"

"Nope, not anymore," Carly said, turning the T.V. off.

"You okay?" Freddie frowned.

"Just peachy," Carly snapped.

"Oh-kay," Freddie said, shaking his head. "Where's Sam? She over here still?"

"Why do you want to know?" Carly asked.

"Um, because I'd sort of like to hang out with my girlfriend for a little bit," Freddie said. "You sure you're okay?"

"Yes! I'm fine!" Carly said.

"Alrighty then," Freddie said, still frowning. "You're clearly in a mood…I'll go stop by Sam's place, since I'm guessing that's where she is."

"Oh, real smart idea, Freddie," Carly said.

"Well…bye then," Freddie said, leaving the apartment.

….

Sam was sitting on her couch, wearing her old sweatpants and tank top as she watched reruns of some old comedy; she really was paying to much attention to it.

"Alright, kid, I'm out of here," Sam's mom said, coming into the living room. "I've got me a date with a vet, and he promised me he'd let me have some poodle hair."

"Lovely," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Why are _you _so glum?" Pam asked. "Shouldn't you be out having fun with that Benson kid?"

"I'm not glum," Sam said. "And Freddie's out doing…something."

"Oh," Pam shrugged. "Well if you're going to sit in front of the T.V. all night, at least remember to record _Wheel of Fortune _for me. I want to get a good luck at Vana's nose so I know what to tell my plastic surgeon on Friday."

"Sure," Sam said, cringing slightly as her mom headed out the door for her own date. Once her mom was gone, she turned up the volume on the television.

How could Freddie do this? She always thought that Freddie was the nicest guy on the planet. Too nice even, sometimes. He always treated her like a princess even through all the insults she hurled at him.

Maybe that was why he ran to this Carmen girl…Maybe she had been _too _aggressive towards him. She always thought he understood that that was just her way of getting close to him, but maybe she had taken it too far…

She was thrust out of her thoughts by the sound of someone knocking at her front door.

Sighing, she turned off the television and dragged her feet to the door. She opened it up to see Freddie himself.

"Hey," he smiled at her.

"What are you doing here?" Sam asked.

"Well I was looking for you at Carly's house, but Carly was in some weird mood, so I figured I'd find you here," Freddie said, giving her a quick kiss.

Sam opened her mouth, fully ready to begin yelling at Freddie for all his lying, but for some reason, no words came out as she stared into his big, brown eyes.

"Anyway," Freddie said. "I can't stay too long; my mom's just got a new thing of tick spray and there's no avoiding that…but I just wanted to know if you were doing anything tomorrow night?"

"Um, no," Sam said.

"Cool, so how about we have ourselves a nice little date night?" Freddie grinned.

_Say something_! Sam told herself furiously. But she found herself nodding yes instead.

"Great," Freddie smiled. "I'll pick you up at Carly's at six?"

"Yeah…six is good," Sam nodded.

"See you then, baby," Freddie said, giving her one last kiss.

…..

"So let me get this straight," Carly said, shaking her head as she paced back and forth in her bedroom. "Freddie comes to your house last night and instead of talking to him about this whole thing you agree to go out with him instead?"

"I tried!" Sam said, falling back on Carly's bed. "But I couldn't do it, okay?"

"Sam," Carly sighed. "You're going to have to bring it up to him eventually. This is something big."

"Yeah, thanks. I had no idea," Sam snapped.

"Just imagine it's like tearing off a Band-Aid," Carly told her. "Do it quick and then it's done."

"It's not gonna be that easy, Carls," Sam mumbled. She sat up. "I'll do it tonight…when he comes to pick me up."

"That's a good idea," Carly nodded. "And remember; I'm here for you no matter what."

…

At six that evening, Sam and Carly were both waiting downstairs.

"Carls, I don't know if I can do this," Sam said.

"Yes you can," Carly encouraged her. There was a knock at the door. "There he is," Carly said.

Sam took a deep breath and headed to the door and opened it. Standing at the doorway was her boyfriend, holding the biggest bouquet of flowers she had ever seen; it must've been half Sam's height.

"Hey," he said, giving her that smile that always made her knees shake. "These are for you."

He handed her the flowers. "You said that red roses were the only type of flowers that didn't make you gag, so I got you some."

"Wow," Sam said softly. "I-um-"

She turned and looked at Carly, who mouthed 'Go on'.

"Who's Carmen Butler?" she blurted out before she could lose her nerve.

"What?" Carly frowned.

"You know…" Sam mumbled, trying to maintain herself. "The-the girl you've been hanging around with all week…the one who you're…cheating on me with."

"Cheating on you?" Freddie repeated, his eyes widening. "Sam…I-I would never cheat on you. I love you."

"Then how come you've been at all these romantic couple places with this chick?" Sam asked, begging her voice not to shake.

Freddie wrinkled his eyebrows in confusion for a moment, and then he laughed.

"What?" Sam frowned.

"Baby," Freddie laughed. "You've got it all wrong…Carmen's an event planer."

"An event planer?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "Or well, an event planer in training. She's an intern."

"Well why did you need an event planer?" Sam asked.

"Because," he replied, taking her hand. "I wanted to have a perfect, romantic night with the girl of my dreams."

"Oh," Sam said. "So-So she's not your secret girlfriend then?"

"No way," Freddie said. "I'm sorry I've been so sketchy these past few days. I just wanted to surprise you."

"Yeah well, it worked," Sam mumbled. She looked up at Freddie. "And I'm sorry I thought you were cheating on me. I knew you weren't that type of guy. I guess I just got a little-"

"Jealous?" Freddie finished for her, grinning cockily.

"Calm down, nub," Sam chuckled. "But hey? Why'd you want to have a big romantic night out anyway?" Her eyes widened. "Um…happy-happy anniversary, baby!" She turned to Carly. "Why didn't you _tell _me it was my anniversary?"

"What?" Carly exclaimed.

"Relax, Sam," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "It's not our anniversary. I just wanted to this. Just because."

"Just because?" Sam repeated.

"Just because," Freddie nodded, giving her a long kiss. "And well, because you're Sam, and I love you."

"Well," Carly said. "While you two go enjoy the most romantic nights of your life, I'll be here, eating ice cream and watching six hours of romantic comedies…man! I need to get myself a boyfriend!"


	266. Chapter 266

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 247, where Freddie tricks Sam into thinking that he's in love with Patrice in order to get back together with her. **

…

_Ice_

"Hey," Carly greeted Sam as she walked into Shay's apartment. "How was your six-month anniversary? Or are you guys counting the time you dated for the first time into this? Because then it would've been your seven-month anniversary or something like that, right?"

"Nah, Freddie and I aren't counting that," Sam laughed, plopping herself down next to Carly on the couch. "We wanted to start with a clean slate."

"Got it," Carly nodded. "And where _is _Freddie anyway? You didn't leave him at the restaurant again, Sam?"

"No! That was _one _time!" Sam said. "He got stopped by his mom on the way up here and she insists that this tiny little mosquito bite on his elbow looks infected, so he's across the hall getting some sort of weird shot. He told me he'd come over here in a little bit. Anyway, I need to talk to you about something."

"What's up?" Carly asked.

"Well," Sam said. "You know that crazy plan the nub came up with six months ago to ask me to get back together?"

"You mean the world's most complex, insane plan that involved playing pretty much everyone he knew?" Carly said.

"Yeah, that on," Sam said. "Anyway, I've been thinking lately…Freddie to get me all rattled up during that little stunt of his…I think it's the _least _I can do for him to repay the favor."

"_You _want to come up with crazy, complex plan?" Carly frowned.

"Well, obviously not _as_ complex," Sam said. "I'm not that patient. But I _do _want to find a way to mess with him…"

"That could be…interesting," Carly said. "Do you have anything in mind?"

"Oh yeah," Sam grinned. "I know _exactly _what I'm going to do."

…

Later that week, Sam and Carly were sitting in the iCarly studio, watching a Splashface video.

"Hey, hey," Freddie said, letting himself into the studio. "What goes on?"

"Just watching this video of a penguin who thinks he's a lion," Carly said, chuckling at the pull out monitor, where a tiny penguin was attempting to roar.

"Hey, baby," Sam smiled, getting up and heading to her boyfriend, giving him a long kiss. "Wow, that shirt looks really good on you, you know."

"Um, thanks," Freddie said. "My mom got it for me at ."

"Well, she has _great _taste," Sam said. "I should remember to tell her that next time I see her."

"Yeah, I'm sure she'll…appreciate that," Freddie said. "Hey, do I smell bacon?"

"Oh yeah, Sam and I were eating some while we watched this," Carly said.

"Oh, I almost forgot," Sam said, running back to her seat and grabbing a large plate of bacon. "I saved you some, Freddie!"

"_You _saved me bacon?" Freddie asked in amazement. "Are you feeling okay, Sam?"

"Just peachy," Sam said, giving Freddie a quick peck on the cheek. "And hey, what are you doing tonight?"

"Nothing, why?"

"Well," Sam said. "I was thinking you and I could have that _Galaxy Wars _marathon you've been talking about."

Freddie nearly choked on his bacon. "Are you serious? You _want _to watch nine straight hours of _Galaxy Wars_?"

"Sure, it's an important part of your life, and I want to be a part of it," Sam said sweetly. "How about I go run to the Groovy Smoothie and buy us some smoothies and then we can start now?"

"I-okay," Freddie nodded. "But did I hear that right? _You're_ going to buy the smoothies?"

"Sure, I have a little cash," Sam replied. "Just give me ten minutes and then we can start our first ever _Galaxy Wars _marathon. Isn't that exciting?"

"Yeah, it is," Freddie grinned. "Wow, I've always wanted to do this with you, but I never thought you'd be willing to do it."

"Well, I love you," Sam told him. "And if you love someone, you do whatever you can to make them happy, isn't that right, Carly?"

"Absolutely," Carly replied.

"Well then I'll have to remember to make this up to you," Freddie said.

"No, no, you don't need to do that," Sam said. "Trust me, just getting to be with you is payment enough."

….

"And that proves that Gibby's will freeze if you put them in a tub filled with 18 bags of ice," Carly said during the teen's web show.

Freddie chuckled as he zoomed in on Gibby, who was shivering as he sat in the tub.

"How you feeling there, Gib?" Sam asked

"I can't _feel _anything right now!" Gibby said, his teeth chattering.

"Well, that's all we've got to you for this iCarly," Carly said, her and Sam stepping in front of the tub. "So until next week-"

"Wait, wait, wait," Sam said. "Baby, give Carly the camera for a sec, okay?"

"Why? What's going on?" Freddie frowned.

"You'll see," Sam told him. "Just come stand next to me."

Freddie gave his girlfriend a confused look, but did as he was told.

"Alright, you guys all know iCarly's amazing technical producer, and my boyfriend, Freddie Benson?" Sam said, pushing a button on her remote so that a loud round of cheering erupted.

"Um, hello," Freddie said, somewhat awkwardly.

"Well," Sam continued. "I just wanted to take a minute to let everyone know what an important contribution Freddie is here at iCarly. Sure, he doesn't do much of the creative work, but without him and his insane tech skills, there would be no show! So how about everyone take a few minutes out of their day to send this guy some fan mail? Yeah? Alright, Fredpie, let's bring this show home."

"Um, okay," Freddie said, hurrying back to get his camera.

"Well, wasn't that adorable," Carly said, grinning. "Anyway, I'm Carly-"

"-And I'm Sam," Sam chimed in.

"And this has been iCarly!"

"And we're clear," Freddie said. "Great show tonight."

"Can I get out of this ice now?" Gibby demanded.

"Oh, yeah, sorry," Carly nodded.

Gibby jumped out of the tub and tan out of the studio.

"So," Freddie said, walking towards Sam and leaning down to give her a kiss. "What was _that _all about?"

"Well you know, I just thought it would be nice for you to get some appreciation for what you do every week," Sam said, rubbing his shoulders. "I know I don't say it that often, but you really _are_ the backbone of iCarly."

"I am?" Freddie said.

"Yup," Sam nodded. She stood on her toes and gave Freddie another kiss. "I'm gonna run downstairs and call my mom. I'll see you guys later."

"Wasn't that sweet of her?" Carly said as Sam left the studio.

"Yeah…" Freddie said slowly. "Almost as sweet as yesterday, when she sat through my four hour math team competition and cheered me on the whole time…Alright, Carls. What's going on here?"

"Whatever do you mean?" Carly asked.

"Come on, why's Sam being so nice all the sudden?" Freddie questioned. "This is _not _how Sam acts."

"You mean a girlfriend can't show her boyfriend she cares about him?" Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Sam doesn't show me she cares this way," Freddie said. "This is how some _normal _girl would do it…but Sam's not normal…she's…well, she's amazing. But seriously, _what _is going on?"

"I told you, I don't know," Carly said innocently.

"Wait a minute…" Freddie said, his eyes widening. "What if…what if she's being all nice because…because we have some big special occasion coming up and I forgot all about it?"

"Hmm," Carly said. "That would be _real _bad if you forgot it."

"Oh man!" Freddie said anxiously, starting to pace. "What's coming up? Her birthday? No, I've still got five months for that…our anniversary? No, that just passed…Think Benson, _think_!"

"Freddie, come on," Carly laughed. "Why don't you just be honest with Sam? _Tell _her you forgot about whatever it is that has her in such a good mood. I mean, it's not like _she _has the best track record remembering stuff."

"Yeah," Freddie said thoughtfully. "I can be honest with her…I'll just go downstairs and talk to her now."

"You do that," Carly called after him. Once he was out of earshot, she shook her head. "Too easy."

….

"Sam?" Freddie said, hurrying down the stairs. "Hey, Sam?"

"Yeah?" Sam asked, sliding her phone back in her pocket.

"Um, listen," Freddie said. "I-I'm going to apologize in advance for this-"

"Apologize for what, Freddie?" Sam asked.

"For forgetting whatever big event is coming up," Freddie said. "I'm sure you told me weeks ago and I just…forgot. So what is it that has you all happy and nice? Your grandma's birthday? A getting-out-or-prison party for one of your Uncles?"

Sam laughed. "Aw, baby. You didn't forget anything."

"I-I didn't?" Freddie frowned. "But then why have you been in this weird good mood?"

"Oh you know, I guess _love's_ just in the air," she said. She patted his shoulder. "Anyway, I need to go, my mom's in mall jail again for causing some scene at Build-A-Bra. I'll see you later."

"So," Carly said, coming down the stairs just as Sam was leaving. "What did you forget?"

"N-nothing," Freddie replied. He shook his head. "Love is in the air? Who is that chick and what did she do with my girlfriend?"

"I think you're overreacting," Carly said simply, walking over to the fridge. "I mean, maybe Sam's just trying-"

"Oh man!" Freddie exclaimed, nearly causing Carly to drop her bottle of Peppy Cola.

"What?" Carly demanded.

"I think I know what's going on," Freddie said. "This is a _trap_!"

"A trap?" Carly repeated. "Okay, you're being a little paranoid now."

"Am I?" Freddie said. "Sam's never this overly-nice to me! She's _plotting _something! You remember that time a couple months ago when she actually sat and watched that two-hour train documentary with me? It was all because she put pudding in my shoes!"

"You guys are a _very _interesting couple," Carly commented.

"And last night she watched _nine _hours of _Galaxy Wars _with me," Freddie said. "Which means whatever she's planning is _way _worse than pudding in my shoes!"

"So let me get this straight," Carly said. "Your girlfriend, who _loves _you, can't do a few nice things for you without you freaking out and thinking she's up to something?"

"Carly, Carly, Carly," Freddie said, chuckling at his friend's foolishness. "I know that Sam loves me, and she _does _do nice things for me without me 'freaking out', as you put it. But she does them in her own…Samish way. Like that time she made that big romantic dinner for me when I was stressed about my Physics test, she said that she was only doing it because she was hungry herself, not because 'love was in the air'. This is weird, daffidily, powderpuff niceness that Sam would never put out!"

"Again, you two are _quite _a couple," Carly said.

"Wait, how long has it been since Sam left?" Freddie asked suddenly.

"I dunno, about ten minutes?" Carly shrugged.

"No!" Freddie cried. "I left my door open! She could've gotten in there and put tarantulas in my sheets!"

"Where would she have even gotten tarantulas-" Carly began, but Freddie was already rushing out of the apartment.

…

"Spencer, where's the milk?" Carly called to her brother the next morning, looking through the fridge.

"Um, I'm using it!" Spencer called back.

"You're in the shower!"

"I need it!"

Carly rolled her eyes and grabbed and apple from the fruit bowl on the kitchen island. There was a knock at the door, and Freddie came in, wearing the same clothes he had on yesterday. His eyes were puffy and bloodshot and he had large circles under them.

"Are we trying to win the zombie look-alike contest there?" Carly grinned.

"I didn't sleep," Freddie mumbled. "Up all night…looking for whatever Sam's up to…"

"Dude, I think you've officially gone off the deep end," Carly told him.

"No, no, no," Freddie said. "I'm still ahead in this whole little plan!"

Carly raised an eyebrow. "_Are_ you?"

"Yeah, because Sam doesn't _know _that I know that she's planning something!" Freddie said triumphantly. "Which means she's lost her element of surprise!"

"Yeah, yeah, let's just get to school," Carly said, grabbing her bag. "Sam texted me. She's already there because-"

"My locker!" Freddie yelled. "She's alone with my locker? _That's _what she's planning! She's going to put Jell-O in my locker! Or fireworks! Or fish!"

"She can't put fish-" Carly started.

"I got to run!" Freddie said, scrambling for the door. "She will _not _win."

"And now I'm going to school by myself," Carly sighed.

….

Freddie ran through the doors of Ridgeway High at top speed, shoving past a group of younger students as he sped towards his locker.

Sam was already standing there, his locker door wide open.

"What-what are you doing?" Freddie panted, out of breath.

"Oh hey!" Sam smiled at her boyfriend. "I just thought I would reorganize your locker for you. It was getting a little cluttered in there."

"No!" Freddie exclaimed, frantically tearing everything out of his locker. "No!"

"Baby? What's wrong?" Sam asked sweetly.

"I-you-I-" Freddie began weakly.

"Oh, guess what?" Sam interrupted. "I just got a new flavor of lip gloss; Mango! Your favorite fruit! Here, tell me what you think of it."

She leaned up and kissed Freddie deeply on the lips.

When they pulled apart, Freddie stared at her, somewhat flabbergasted.

"So?" Sam grinned.

"It's poison, isn't it?" Freddie said. "You-Your lip gloss…That's just fighting dirty!"

"I didn't poison my lip gloss," Sam said. "Are you feeling okay? Here, I baked you some cookies-"

"Ah! No! No! I can't do it anymore!" Freddie gasped, slumping against his locker in defeat. "You-You…Just-Just do it already, Sam! I can't take this madness anymore!"

"Do what?" Sam asked innocently.

"I know-I know you're planning something," Freddie said. "So just do it."

Sam laughed as she kneeled down next to Freddie and gave him another kiss.

"I already did it," she whispered to him, putting her arm around him, grinning victoriously.

"You-what?" Freddie frowned.

"I already did it," Sam repeated. "This whole week I've been doing it…I knew that once I started being way, _way _too nice to you, you'd start to get suspicious, and that you would drive yourself insane trying to figure out what I was up to…And I was right."

"So…_this _was your plan?" Freddie asked.

"Uh-huh," Sam nodded. "And I think it's my best one yet."

"Sam!" Freddie cried indignantly. "I was going insane!"

"Yeah, you were," Sam said. "Just like _I _was going insane that week you pulled that little stunt of yours and made me think you were in love with Patrice. So now, I think we're officially even."

"But-That was six months ago!"

"I know," Sam shrugged. "Your point? Anyway, baby, you should probably go to the nurse. You look really awful."

She gave him a fleeting smile and walked off.

"She's brilliant," Freddie said, staring after his girlfriend. He shook his head. "Just you wait, Puckett. Just you wait…"

…

**AN-As most of you probably guessed, I sort of based that off of that Drake and Josh episode "Megan's Revenge". Man…I miss Drake and Josh. I don't know if I said this already, but when iCarly first came out, I hated it and refused to watch it because I was convinced that it was the reason they canceled Drake and Josh (which isn't true, by the way). I only started watching iCarly after I accidently recorded the iDream of Dance episode, and realized it was actually a pretty cool show. **


	267. Chapter 267

_Gorilla_

"Ugh!" Sam groaned as she slammed the door of the Shay's apartment.

"Well hello to you too," Carly said, looking up from her textbook. Her and Freddie had been sitting on the couch studying.

"What's wrong?" Freddie asked his girlfriend, concerned.

"You got any ham?" Sam snapped, ignoring him.

"Um, yeah, in the fridge, second shelf," Carly nodded.

"I can't believe this!" Sam said angrily, grabbing her ham and sitting down next to the other two. "This is the worst thing that could possibly happen to a person!"

"What is?" Freddie asked again. "Come on, you can tell us."

"I have to go to some big fancy dinner," Sam mutter, chewing her ham furiously.

Carly and Freddie exchanged glances.

"Yup," Carly sighed. "That's just about the worst thing that could happen to you, Sam. Right up there with getting attacked by a shark and finding a hobo in your closet."

"Why are you so upset about having to go to some fancy dinner?" Freddie questioned. "You love dinner! It's your second favorite meal of the day, right after third lunch!"

"Because," Sam explained. "It's with a bunch of prissy girls who I hate."

"What's this dinner for?" Carly frowned.

"It's for all the teen beauty pageant winners in Washington," Sam sighed. "And I've got to go represent Seattle since I was the winner in that one pageant last year."

"Wait, _what _beauty pageant?" Freddie frowned. "You were in a _beauty pageant_? Where the heck was I?"

"You were at home, playing some headband game with Spencer," Carly told him. "Remember? We came home and _showed _you Sam in her crown, but you two were too wrapped up in your game to even look. And then Sam refused to ever speak of it again after that."

"So my girlfriend was in a beauty pageant and _won_," Freddie said slowly. "And I wasn't even there to _see_ it?"

"Pretty much," Carly nodded.

"Oh come _on_!" Freddie said angrily, slamming his textbook shut. "Is the universe punishing me for something?"

"We weren't even dating then," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"You think I can find this pageant online?" Freddie asked, grabbing his laptop, ignoring Sam's last comment. "Or maybe I could find the names of some of the people in the audience and track them down to see if maybe one of them recorded it? Or I can try hacking into whatever channel broadcasted it and go through all its past video files!"

"Okay then," Carly said as Freddie began to type away at his laptop. She turned back to Sam. "So you have to go to some dinner with a bunch of prissy girls? You can handle that! Just go there, eat the food, eat the food, and call it a day!"

"It's a _long_ dinner, Carls," Sam said. "We have to listen to a bunch of people talk about how apparently winning beauty pageants is helping change the world for the children. Plus I have to get all dolled up, and I have to find a date-"

"Well you won't have any trouble with _that_," Carly smiled. "You have a boyfriend right here who probably won't look up from his computer until he finds that video of you at the pageant." She moved closed to Freddie and whispered, "By the way, I have the whole thing on my Pear phone…"

"Carly!" Sam exclaimed.

Carly ignored Sam and turned back to Freddie. "Anyway, you'd go with Sam to this dinner as her date, right?"

"Um, shoosh yes," Freddie nodded.

"I was just gonna call in sick," Sam moaned.

"Come on, it will be fun," Freddie said, putting his arm around her. He turned back to Carly. "You _are_ sending me that video, right?"

"Already done," Carly smiled.

"But it's on the day of the new gorilla exhibit at the zoo!" Sam said. "I wanted to see that!"

"Sam, remember how hard you worked at that pageant?" Carly reasoned with her. "You walked around in heels and uncomfortable dresses for hours, and then you did that really cool dance-"

"You _danced_ in this?" Freddie exclaimed, his eyes widening.

"Shut up!" Sam snapped.

"And you wound up doing what you wanted to do there," Carly continued. "You beat Leanne Carter and kept her from winning 100 straight pageants! You should be so proud of yourself. It would be a shame for you not to go to this dinner and own what you did."

"I _was_ pretty awesome…" Sam said thoughtfully.

"Plus it will be like a free romantic date for us," Freddie added.

"And those places usually have good food," Sam said. "Okay…I'll go."

"Good for you, Sam," Freddie said, kissing her. He got to his feet. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have me a video to watch."

…

"Whoa, this place is huge!" Freddie commented as him and Sam walked into the ballroom of the Parker Nicholas hotel, where the pageant dinner was being held.

"Yeah, so maybe they won't notice if we sneak out," Sam mumbled.

"Sam," Freddie said, taking her hand. "This is your special night. Besides, you look _way_ too hot to let it all go to waste."

Sam, with the help of Carly, of course, had dressed herself in light blue halter dress that stopped just above her knees. She had paired it with a pair of silver heels and Carly had put her hair up high for her.

"I do look good…" Sam said. "Okay, fine, we'll stay. But if they try to give me some vegetarian meal for dinner, we're out of here, got it?"

"Deal," Freddie said.

The couple walked over to their table and sat down where they saw their name cards.

Suddenly, they heard a cry from behind them. "Oh my God! Sam!"

They turned around and saw a tall blonde girl running over to the table.

"Aw crab," Sam mumbled.

"Sam!" the girl cried again, reaching the table. "It's so good to see you again!"

"Um yeah, you too, Alana," Sam said, cringing. "Uh, Freddie? This is Alana. She and I used to compete together when we were younger. Alana, this is my boyfriend, Freddie."

"A boyfriend?" Alana grinned. "He's _cute_, Sam. Good work!"

"Thank you?" Freddie frowned, shaking the girl's hair.

"Anyway," Alana continued, turning back to Sam. "Have you seen Hilary's dress tonight? She's _totally _trying to hard; and she can't pull of that shade of white with that fake tan she has, am I right?"

"Sure, whatever," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Hilary! Hi! How are you? I _love_ your dress!" Alana said, apparently losing interest in Sam and running off.

"Well, I see why you hate pageant girls," Freddie said, shaking his head.

"They're all total prisses who only care about hairspray and pantyhose," Sam muttered. "They're all awful!"

"Not _all _of them," Freddie said. "I happen to know one pageant girl who's fun, awesome, crazy, and pretty much just all-around perfect. And I happen to be dating her."

"Aw, how long did it take you to think that one up?" Sam grinned, but she was blushing anyway. She tilted her head up to give her boyfriend a long kiss. "But," she said once they broke apart. "Call me a pageant girl again and I'll slap you so hard you'll think _you're _one, got it?"

"Got it," Freddie said.


	268. Chapter 268

_Command_

"Mommy?" Four-year old Jason asked his mother, climbing up next to Sam on the couch. "Can my baby brother or sister come _now_?"

"Sorry kid, you've got another month to wait," Sam smiled, kissing the top of Jason's head. "But hey, put your hand right here on my stomach. You feel the baby kicking?"

"Yeah!" Jason said excitedly. "I feel it!"

"Pretty cool, huh?" Sam chuckled. He stomach gave a growl suddenly. "Yo, Fredwad?" she yelled into the kitchen. "What's taking forever with my sandwich?"

"I'm coming! I just have to add the last layer of ham!" Freddie called back.

Just then, there was a knock at the Benson's door.

"Can you get it for me, Jason?" Sam asked. "It's your Aunt Melanie."

"Okay," Jason said, hopping down and running to the front door.

"Hi, Jason," Melanie smiled as the child opened the door.

"Hi Aunt Melanie," Jason replied. "Mommy said I have to wait another month to see my baby brother or sister."

"Sorry, kiddo," Melanie smiled. She put her hand on her own swollen abdomen. "But if it makes you feel any better, you only have to wait two more weeks to see your baby cousin."

She sat down next to Sam. "What have you been up to all day?"

"Nothing, just making Freddie make me a bunch of food," Sam said, leaning back in her seat. "That's one of the best things about being pregnant…I can command him to do anything, and he has to do it because I'm carrying his kid."

"You make him do stuff anyway, even when you're not pregnant," Melanie pointed out, rolling her eyes.

"True," Sam shrugged. "But now he can't give me sas about it. Hey, I'm bored."

"Then put the T.V. on," Melanie suggested.

"Nah, there's nothing good on," Sam said. "But I have an idea…you wanna have some fun?"

"What sort of fun?" Melanie asked slowly. She learned long ago that 'fun' with her twin usually meant doing something illegal.

"Let's prank Freddie," Sam said, grinning mischievously. "You think he can tell us apart?"

"He _can _tell us apart, Sam," Melanie reminded her. "He does it all the time."

"Sure, when we're right next to each other," Sam said. "But if I leave the room…besides, now that we're both pregnant, he's been having a little bit of trouble lately. So has your husband."

"That's true…" Melanie said thoughtfully. "It would be sort of cool to see if it would work…"

"Exactly!" Sam said, getting to her feet. "Now come upstairs! It will be a dead give away if you keep that frilly girly shirt on. Put one of mine on."

The girls hurried upstairs and headed towards Sam and Freddie's bedroom.

"Mommy?" Jason asked, poking his head out of his room. "What are you doing?"

"Me and Aunt Melanie," Sam told him. "Are gonna play a prank on daddy. You want to help us?"

Jason nodded eagerly.

"Well, we're going to make daddy think that Aunt Melanie's really me, and we're gonna see how long it take him to realize it's not," Sam grinned. "Sound like fun?"

"Uh-huh!"

"Good," Sam laughed. "So how about you go downstairs and make sure daddy doesn't come up here, okay? And make sure you don't give our plan away."

"Okay!" Jason said, running downstairs.

"Think he can really keep the secret?" Sam asked.

"Probably not for too long," Sam admitted. "So hurry up. Here," she tossed her twin one of her shirts from her closet. "Put that on and go downstairs."

Melanie did as she was told, taking off her light pink dress shirt and throwing on one of Sam's t-shirts.

"Sam!" the twins heard Freddie calling from downstairs. "Where are you? I have your sandwich!"

"Um, coming!" Melanie called back down.

"Don't blow it," Sam told her. "And make me look good, will you?"

Melanie rolled her eyes as she headed downstairs. Sam sat down at the top of the stairs so she could see Freddie, but he couldn't see her.

"What were you doing up there?" Freddie asked Melanie, thinking she was Sam, as Melanie entered the living room. "The doctor said you shouldn't be climbing the stairs too much."

"I was just, um, using the bathroom," Melanie said lamely.

"Oh, well, here's your sandwich," Freddie told her, sitting down on the couch next to her. "Extra ham, just like you asked."

Sam frowned from her spot on the steps…Melanie was a vegetarian.

"Um, thanks…nub," Melanie said, trying not to gag at the smell of meat. "But I'm not really hungry anymore."

"Wow," Freddie chuckled, shaking his head. "You and your cravings, baby. Anyway, who was at the door a few minutes ago? I heard a knock."

"Um, it was just a salesperson," Melanie replied quickly.

Sam glanced over at her son, who was sitting in one of the armchairs, trying not to laugh.

"You okay, Jason?" Freddie asked.

Jason nodded, obviously not trusting himself to talk.

"So hey, I was thinking you and I could go out to dinner this weekend," Freddie said. "Since we only have a few more weeks until the baby comes…You think Melanie could babysit for us?"

"Yeah, I'm sure-" Melanie started, but at that point Jason burst out laughing.

"What's so funny?" Freddie frowned, confused.

"Daddy, that's Aunt Melanie!" Jason giggled.

"What?" Freddie exclaimed. He looked at Melanie, examining her.

"M-Melanie?" Freddie asked, finally realizing that this was not his wife. "But why-? How did-? Sam!"

"Yes baby?" Sam said brightly, coming downstairs.

"That was funny, mommy!" Jason said, still laughing.

"I know, wasn't it?" Sam grinned.

"Why'd you do that?" Freddie demanded.

"Because I was bored," Sam shrugged. "And I don't think you get to be the mad one here, Mr. I-Didn't-Know-I-Was-Talking-To-My-Wife's-Twin."

"You know I can tell you two apart," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "When you're together and I'm _expecting _it! Plus, I'm running on three hours of sleep since _someone _kept waking me up to make her food last night."

"Yeah, which is why I forgive you," Sam smiled, giving him a quick kiss. "This time."


	269. Chapter 269

**AN- As promised, whenever there is a Seddie-kid-centered oneshot, I'm adding a high school seddie oneshot with it.**

…**..**

_Attempt_

"Explain it to me one more time," Freddie said.

"Ugh, fine," Sam moaned. "If the offensive team throws the ball and the _defensive _team catches it, it's called an interception, and the defensive team gets ball possession."

"But what down would that be then?" Freddie asked.

"Dude, you're like, the one guy in America who doesn't get football," Sam sighed, shaking her head.

"I could tell you all about the new rams of the latest Pearbook models," Freddie muttered indignantly.

"Yeah, but no one _cares _about that," Sam smiled, leaning over to give her husband a kiss. "Anyway, baby, Tyler will tell you what's going on during the game tonight. The whole point of you taking him to the _biggest _Cobra game of the year is so that you two can make an attempt to bond and what not."

"I know," Freddie said. "I'm looking forward to that, just not the whole…football part."

"Well Tyler's been looking forward to this game all year," Sam said. "And speaking of which, you two better get going."

"Oh, right," Freddie said, looking at his watch. "Tyler! Come on, we've got to go!"

"Coming!" Tyler said, racing down the stairs, wearing his Cobra's jersey.

"You excited?" Sam grinned.

"Oh yeah," Tyler nodded. "I was looking up the predictions on this game on the Internet, and everyone's saying that this is going to be one of the best football games in history. And me and dad get to be there!"

"Well then let's go, we've got an hour drive ahead of us," Freddie said. "And while we drive, tell me the difference between the quarterback and the running back, because right now, I've got no clue."

Once Freddie and Tyler had left the house, Sam kicked her feet up on the coffee table and grabbed the remote, ready to enjoy a relaxing evening on her own. Just as she had turned on her favorite channel, the Surgery Channel, her sixteen-year old daughter, Emma, came downstairs and flopped down on one of the armchairs in the room.

"I didn't know you were home," Sam frowned. "I thought you had a date with Quincy tonight."

"Yeah, so did I," Emma sighed. "But he called and told me that he couldn't make it tonight. So now I'm stuck at home watching the Surgery Channel."

"Hey, I'd say that's still a pretty good night," Sam said.

Emma gave a small smile. But then it faltered. "Um, mom…when you and dad broke up that one time in high school…did you see it coming?"

"What do you mean?" Sam asked, muting the television.

"Like, did he become sort of…distant?" Emma asked.

"Um, not really," Sam replied. "The problem was that we spent _too _much time together. And we weren't really ready to deal with that then…it was easier to just break up. I mean, we obviously realized how stupid that was eventually. Why?"

"I dunno," Emma mumbled. "It just sort of feels like Quincy doesn't want to hang out as much lately. He canceled our date tonight, lately he's always been busy after school. Even when we talk on the phone, he makes some lame excuse to go after ten minutes."

"Well, maybe he's just, I dunno, stressed about something," Sam reasoned, not liking the sad expression on her daughter's face.

"About what?" Emma said. "He doesn't have a stressful life!"

"Look, Em, there's a _million _reasons why he could be acting weird," Sam told her. "Having Gibby as a dad could finally be catching up to him, school, guy stuff…it doesn't have to be because of you."

"So should I, you know, talk to him?" Emma asked.

"Well…I generally try to _avoid_ giving the talk advice," Sam said. "But that's probably your best bet. Ordinarily I'd suggest numchucks, but I don't need Gibby on my case about that."

…

The next day at the high school, Emma leaned against her locker, in deep thought.

"You wanna come to the mall, Em?" Ashton asked her twin, coming up to her with the girls' best friend, Clarissa. "We're gonna go try and find some cute skirts at that new store that opened up."

"I know you're still upset that they replaced Choco-Meats with it," Clarissa said. "But they have some good stuff there!"

"Huh?" Emma said, snapping out of her thoughts. "Oh, um, no. I'm gonna pass."

"Okay," Ashton shrugged. "Tell mom I'll be home by dinner."

Emma watched as her twin and best friend disappeared around the corner. She turned her head and spotted Quincy Gibson walking over to his locker. Not able to help herself, Emma hurried over there to him.

"Oh, hey Em," Quincy smiled as his girlfriend approached. "I was just going to text you."

"Were you?" Emma asked, crossing her arms. "Spill it, Gibson. What's up?"

"What do you mean?" Quincy frowned.

"I _mean_, why have you been so…distant lately?" Emma asked. "You're usually the one wants to hang out all the time and be all couplely…what gives?"

"Oh…you've noticed?" Quincy sighed.

"Yes I noticed!"

"Well, that's sort of what I wanted to talk to you about," Quincy said.

Emma's face dropped. Was this it? Was she about to get the break-up speech?  
"Actually," Quincy said. "I can show you…come with me."

"Huh?" Emma said. "What do you mean show me?"

"Just come on," Quincy said, grabbing her hand.

Quincy led Emma out to the school parking lot and over to his old beat up car. He opened up the trunk and took out a large object that was covered up with a cloth.

"What is that?" Emma asked.

"I've been working on it for a couple weeks now," Quincy told her. "In pottery club."

"You made _this _in pottery club?" Emma said. "It's huge!"

"I know, which is why I had to work on it a lot at home," Quincy said. "And, well, it's why I've been acting so distant. I wanted to get it done."

"So you couldn't have just _told _me that?" Emma said, giving him a light punch on his shoulder.

"No," Quincy said. "I couldn't."

"Why?" Emma asked, confused."

"Because," Quincy smiled, lifting the cloth off his project. "I wanted to surprise you."

He revealed a large, beautiful floor vase. Upon a closer look, Emma saw that the entire thing was plastered with pictures of her and Quincy, like a collage.

"It's for you," Quincy told her. "Do-Do you like it?"

"Y-Yeah," Emma nodded, breathless.

"Oh wait, one more thing," Quincy said, running up to the front seat of the car and opening the door. He grabbed a bouquet of flowers and handed them to Emma. "These are for you too, you know, for the vase."

Emma looked at him, and started to laugh.

"What?" Quincy asked.

"It's just," Emma explained. "I thought the reason you were being so distant these past few weeks was because you wanted to break up with me."

"Why would I break up with you?" Quincy asked.

"I dunno, I'm awesome," Emma grinned.

"I know," Quincy laughed, leaning down to kiss her. "You are."


	270. Chapter 270

_Ankle_

"Puckett! Benson!" Mr. Howard snapped, slamming down his piece of chalk as he spun around to glare at the couple. "Will you _stop _sending your little _love texts _during _my _class?"

"We weren't texting, sir," Freddie said, quickly, stashing his phone in his pocket.

"Yeah we were," Sam said, still holding her phone out in plain view.

"Sam!" Freddie hissed.

"That's it, you two earned yourself a stay in detention after school," Mr. Howard yelled, furiously grabbing the pad of detention slips he kept on his desk.

"Um, actually, I was sort of the only one who had my phone out," Sam spoke up.

Freddie gave Sam a confused glance. "What are you talking about? We were both-" but Sam swatted his arm before he could finish his sentence.

"Fine, you'll be doing detention solo," Mr. Howard told her, slamming a detention slip down on her desk. "And don't be late this time!"

After class, Freddie took Sam's arm.

"Hey," he said. "Why'd you tell Howard you were the only one with your phone out?"

"Because," Sam shrugged. "You've never been to detention, right?"

"Right," Freddie nodded.

"Exactly," Sam said. "Trust me. You couldn't handle it."

"What?" Freddie exclaimed. "I could too handle it!"

Sam laughed. "Baby, I say this because I care about you, and I love you…you'd be torn apart in there."

"It's detention, Sam, not prison," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Oh, you wouldn't even make it five seconds in prison," Sam told him.

"Hey, what are you two talking about?" Carly asked, joining her friends.

"Carls, you remember that one time you got detention with me for chewing gum?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," Carly nodded.

"Well Freddie here seems to think he could handle being in detention," Sam told her. "Could you _please _tell him how insane it is in there?"

"Oh yeah, you wouldn't last," Carly told him. "It's a scary, scary place…"

"Come on," Freddie said. "This is coming from _Carly_."

"Hey!" Carly retorted indignantly. "You're not that far above me on the toughness totem, buddy. In fact, after that freak out with the ladybug yesterday, I'd say you fell a few notches below me."

"I thought it was a spider!" Freddie snapped.

"Not helping yourself," Carly smirked.

"Spiders can be deadly!" Freddie argued. "But this is ridiculous! The detention room's not going to be filled with ladybugs _or _spiders."

"Look, it's cute that you think you're all tough," Sam chuckled, giving him a kiss on the cheek. "But believe me, baby. I did you a favor my getting you out of that detention."

"Sam, I'm tired of you thinking I'm some lame wimpy nub," Freddie moaned.

"But you are a lame, wimpy nub," Sam pointed out.

"Sam, this is the part where you're supposed to be _supportive_," Carly whispered.

"I, uh, meant that in a good way," Sam added.

"I can handle more than my train club meetings and computers," Freddie told her. "And you know what? I'm gonna prove it to you!" He stormed off, muttering something under his breath about 'stupid ladybugs'.

"I don't think this is gonna end well," Carly frowned.

"Nah, probably not," Sam agreed. "But hopefully it will at least be entertaining."

…..

"Guess who just earned himself one of _these _babies," Freddie said smugly, sitting down with Carly and Sam at their lunch table later that day, waving a tiny pink detention slip proudly in his hand.

Sam nearly choked on her ham sandwich. "You got yourself detention?"

"Freddie, I'm telling you," Carly sighed, shaking her head. "You're going to regret this."

"No I'm not," Freddie said firmly. "My girlfriend handles detention every other day! I can handle it for _one_."

"Your girlfriend has also done time in Juvie," Carly said. "She can take care of herself in there, right Sam?"

"Yeah," Sam gasped, finally managing to swallow her sandwich. "Freddie, you don't know what kinds of kids are in there. Sure, you have your kids who get detention over stupid things like gum chewing and texting. But you know what? They're never in there because they're smart and go to Principle Franklin to get some sort of alternative essay to do instead, which is what you better do."

"That's what I would've done that one time, if Principle Franklin had been there," Carly nodded. "But he was at some stupid principle's convention, so I didn't have any choice."

"I'm not going to go crawling to Principle Franklin," Freddie said. "I got the detention, and I fully intend to serve it out."

"Ugh, you can't say things like that in there!" Sam moaned. "They'll rip you apart!"

"No one's going to rip me apart," Freddie told her.

"Look, you know who has detention today?" Sam asked. "Lisa Jammerson, who tried to 'pop' Mrs. Brigg's pointy boobs, Scott Marks, who, right before you came in here, threw his lunch tray at one of the lunch ladies for giving him skim milk instead of whole, Kevin Burkes, who tried to chew off the secretary's ankle, Angel Barker, who slashed all of Mr. Howard's tires-"

"Okay, why are these people not in Juvie?" Carly asked.

"Oh, they've _been_ in Juvie," Sam told her. She turned back to her boyfriend. "Dude, _please_ go to Franklin and ask to do some lame essay instead of doing your detention. I mean, you _like _writing essays. If you come to detention, your gonna wind up getting yourself in trouble, and I'm gonna have to come rescue you."

"You're not gonna rescue me," Freddie said. "For the millionth time, I'm not as weak as you think I am. Now if you'll excuse me, I got to go call my mom and tell her that I'll be missing our puzzle time today."

….

Sam and Freddie walked into the detention room after school that day.

"Franklin's just getting ready to leave for the day," Sam told him. "Last chance to do the smart thing and get out of this."

"Not happening," Freddie smirked.

"Yo! Puckett!" a large girl with big muscles said, nodding over at Sam. "How you been?"

"Been good, Kowski," Sam grinned, bumping knuckles with the girl. "What are you in for?"

"Eh, that janitor with the lazy eye caught me using his mop to chase after the little freshmen," Kowski said. "But it was worth it."

"Yeah, those freshmen, they're really something, am I right?" Freddie said. He held out his knuckles to Kowski. "Name's Benson."

Kowski frowned and looked up at Sam. "What's this?"

Sam sighed. "This is Freddie…"

"Whoa, ain't that your little iCarly boyfriend?" a boy with long, messy hair spoke up from the back of the class.

"Yeah, it is," said another girl with green hair. "The tech puppet."

"See, they already know me," Freddie grinned as Sam. "These are my people."

"You are going to get yourself, _killed_," Sam hissed at him.

"No, I'm going to _prove _to you that I can handle detention without your help," Freddie said, determined.

Sam opened her mouth to argue, but then thought better of it. "Fine," she said. "I guess you're gonna learn the hard way then."

"Good," Freddie replied, satisfied, sitting down at the empty desk between Kowski and the girl with green hair. "So, do you ladies want me to tell you the difference between a 1960 Trudgemaster and a1961 model?"

Sam rolled her eyes as she headed to the back of the classroom to the only open desk.

"Hey, Puckett?" one of Sam's detention buddies asked. "Wanna play a little poker with me and the guys?"

"Not now, Miller," Sam hushed him, not taking her eyes off Freddie, who was telling a group of students about the proper way to fertilize a tomato plant.

"So, Benson," a particularly large student said to Freddie, stepping closer to Freddie. "You seem to know a lot about technology…have you heard about the latest app that everyone's talking about? It's called Smash Time."

"Oh no," Sam muttered.

"Um, no, I actually haven't," Freddie replied. "Was it mentioned in last month's "In the Pear" newsletter?"

The students snickered.

"Here, I'll download it for you," the boy said, holding out his friend for Freddie's phone.

"Oh, well okay, thanks!" Freddie said, handing over his phone. "So, what exactly does this Smash Time app do? Is it a game?"

"It does this," the boy grinned, slamming poor Freddie's phone down on a nearby desk, shattering it to pieces.

Sam glared at the boy and willed herself to stay in her seat. She didn't want to embarrass Freddie.

"Oh, uh, good-good thing I took out the extended warranty on that," Freddie said, a little shocked at what had just happened to his precious phone. "And backed all my data up with that cloud thing. So-So no harm done."

"Hey Benson, you hungry?" Kowski asked, cracking her knuckles.

"Um, I-I could eat," Freddie said, a hint of nervousness in his voice.

"You want a Hurtz Donut?" Kowski offered.

"Yeah, that'd be-" Freddie started, but was cut off as Kowski slugged him, hard, in the shoulder. She punched him so hard that he fell out of his seat onto the floor.

Sam could feel her blood boil. She knew that Kowski hit hard; nearly as hard as her, and she knew that she hadn't held back when she hit her boyfriend.

"Hurts, don't it?" Kowski laughed.

"Oh, ha, ha, I-I get," Freddie winced, rubbing his very sore shoulder.

"Hey, I'd bet he'd look good with a fat lip to go with that bruise," the girl with the green hair said, getting to her feet and approaching Freddie, her fist out.

"Um, no, no, I-I really don't think I-" Freddie started, but Sam had had enough.

"Hey, stop beating on him you pathetic stubrags!" Sam snapped, getting out of her seat and heading over to the group.

Most of the students backed away, a smart move on their part. Kowski, the girl with the green hair, and the boy who had broken Freddie's phone, all laughed.

"Oh, Puckett's here to protect her little boyfriend," Kowski teased. "What you gonna do? Beat me with that butter sock of yours?"

"That probably _would _knock some of the ugly out of you idiots," Sam sneered. "But I don't need my butter sock. I can handle you just fine with these." She held up her bare fists. "Now get away before you have to _crawl _away."

The three stared at Sam's fists, and then, knowing just how strong Sam was, backed away.

"Smart," Sam snapped. She kneeled down by Freddie. "You okay?"

"Um, yeah, I'm fine," Freddie nodded.

"Let's get out of here," Sam said. "There's only ten minutes left of detention anyway. No one will care if we leave."

Sam and Freddie left the classroom.

"You sure your arm's okay?" Sam asked as they headed out of the school.

"It's just bruised," Freddie replied. "Hey…thanks for helping me out in there."

"Yeah, well, I wasn't gonna let them give you a fat lip," Sam said. "It would be pretty hard to make out with that."

"I just-I just didn't want you to think I'm some nerdy boyfriend who can't handle, you know, tougher crowds."

"Hey, if I wanted some stupid boyfriend who was in Juvie and picked fights with everyone, I'd find one like that," Sam said. "But I don't. I, and don't let this get around, I actually _like _that you're sort of geeky and nubby. It's…cute."

"You think?" Freddie grinned.

"Uh-huh," Sam smiled, leaning up to kiss him gently. "I do."


	271. Chapter 271

_Lotion_

"So then I switched to _this _lotion," Gibby said, pulling a large bottle of lotion out of his bag and placing it on the Benson's coffee table. "Because I thought it would help the bottom of my feet. And I was right. Feel these babies!"

He put his bare feet on the coffee table.

"Gibby!" Sam snapped. "No one wants to touch you gross feet!"

"But they're really soft," Gibby's wife, Tasha, said, stroking her husband's feet.

"Um, I think we're still good," Freddie frowned. He looked at his watch. "What time are Emma and Quincy supposed to be coming over?"

"Emma told me noon," Sam replied.

"Well it's almost twelve thirty now," Freddie pointed out.

"Calm down, you know Emma's never on time to anything," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Hey, do you guys know why they wanted to meet us all here?" Gibby asked.

"No clue," Freddie said. "All they told us was to have you guys come over because they wanted to talk to us about something."

"Wow, don't you love how we can have family meetings like this together now that our kids got married?" Gibby asked. "Isn't it great?"

"Fantastic," Sam said, her voice dripping in sarcasm.

Just then they heard the front door of the Benson's house open and Emma and Quincy came in.

"Hey," Emma said. "Sorry we're late. Quincy drive, like, ten miles an hour."  
"I was going the speed limit," Quincy said. "And we still would've been here on time if _someone _would've woken up earlier."

Emma rolled her eyes and sat down.

"You guys want any coffee?" Freddie asked, holding up a half-filled coffee pot. "Made it fresh from some fancy Spanish coffee beans."

"Yeah, thanks," Quincy nodded.

"Um, none for me," Emma said. "But hey, are those almonds? Give me those."

"You hate almonds, I thought," Sam pointed out as Emma grabbed the bowl from the coffee table.

"Eh, they're not so bad," Emma shrugged, popping a few in her mouth.

"Hey, what did you guys want to tell us?" Gibby asked. "Wait, I know what this about."

"You do?" Quincy frowned.

"Of course!" Gibby nodded. "You heard that I switched lotions and you're here to see if the results were worth the change." He put his feet back on the coffee table. "I think you'll feel for yourself how smooth these-"

"They don't want to see you dang feet!" Sam yelled, swatting his feet off the table.

"So what's up?" Freddie asked his daughter and son-in-law. "Why'd you want us all here?"

"Well," Emma said. "We couldn't decide whose parent to tell first, so we figured it would just be easier to tell you guys at the same time."

"Tell us what?" Sam asked.

Emma smiled and Quincy put his arm around her. "I'm pregnant."

Freddie nearly dropped his coffee cup and Sam's eyes widened.

"Pregnant?" Sam repeated.

Emma nodded. "Yeah. We found out about a week ago. I'm two months along."

"Wow-That's-that's great!" Sam grinned, standing up to hug her daughter. "Congratulations, sweetheart!"

"Yeah, we're really happy for you two," Freddie smiled, hugging Quincy.

"Wow, can you believe it?" Gibby said excitedly as Tasha hugged Emma. "We're all gonna be grandparents together!"

"Yeah, well," Sam said, cringing slightly as that thought. "Freddie and I are going to make sure we're the favorite grandparents."

"Please," Freddie scoffed. "Like it's gonna be any contest."

"Um, excuse me, I have _lotion_," Gibby said. "I think we both know who the favorites will be."

"Yeah, the _normal _grandparents," Sam retorted. "AKA, _us_!"

"It's on you two!" Gibby said confidently. "Just you wait…"


	272. Chapter 272

_Date_

"Spencer! You can't keep freezing your gym socks," Carly said, pulling two frozen socks out of the freezer.

"But they feel so cool and refreshing when I work out!" Spencer replied.

"You don't work out!"

"I could if I wanted to!"

Suddenly there was a knock at the Shay's door and Freddie came in.

"Hey," he said, sounding distracted about something. He sat down on the couch next to Spencer.

"What's up?" Carly asked.

"Nothing," Freddie sighed.

"Wow, some sigh for a guy who has nothing wrong," Spencer said.

"It's just…well, Sam and I broke up like, six months ago, right?" Freddie stated.

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "So?"

"Well, while we were dating," Freddie explained. "I had decided I wanted to have this big, awesome, over-the-top date for her."

"Did you ever get to do it?" Spencer asked. "Before you two, you know, broke up?"

"No," Freddie replied. "But I had it all planned out. We were going to go to the all-you-can-eat steak buffet at Mr. Bibby's, then I was going to take her to her favorite ice cream place, you know, the one that gives you insanely huge portions. And then we were going to go that big fight she's been dying to see with that one guy with the metal foot-"

"Linton the Limper?" Spencer asked.

"Yeah, him," Freddie said.

"But that fight's this weekend," Spencer said.

"Yeah, Sam's been talking about it for weeks now," Carly said. "She's really torn up that they sold out of tickets months ago."

"I know," Freddie sighed. "Which is the problem…See, I was so excited about this big date that I went ahead and bought the tickets for the fight all the way back when we were still dating. And they finally came in the mail today, and well, me and Sam obviously aren't a couple anymore, so now I really don't know what to do with them." He pulled two tickets out of his pocket. "I was so excited when I ordered them, but now it's just depressing to have them."

"You could always sell them," Spencer offered.

"Nah, to do that I'd have to go to the arena and stand out there until someone buys them off me," Freddie said. "And we both know that I'd be the first one to get ripped off out there."

"Yeah, that's very true," Spencer said.

Carly rolled her eyes. "Well if you already bought the tickets," she told Freddie. "Why don't you just take Sam anyway? I mean, she really wants to go to this fight, and you guys _are_ still friends. Just go and have fun together."

"The seats I got us are in this couple's section, Carls," Freddie muttered.

"Couple's section?" Carly repeated. "They have a _couple's _section at a fighting arena?"

"Apparently it's a hot date spot," Freddie told her.

"I'm gonna go with Carly on this one, dude," Spencer said. "Just go with Sam as friends anyway. No use wasting those tickets." He got to his feet. "Now then, Carly, my socks, if you'd please. I'm gonna go work out."

"You mean you're gonna go run down the street and then take a bus to Amazing Glaze?" Carly said knowingly.

"…Maybe," Spencer said lamely, grabbing his socks and heading out the door.

….

Later that day, Freddie headed up to the iCarly studio where he knew Sam was pretending to do her homework.

"Hey," he said, letting himself into the studio.

"Yo, what's up Benson?" Sam asked, pulling her earbuds out of her ear.

"I thought you were up here studying for our math test tomorrow," Freddie grinned, picking up Sam's closed textbook.

"I thought about it, but then I decided it was stupid, so I'm jamming out to my music instead," Sam said simply.

"Of course," Freddie smiled. "Anyway, what are you doing this Friday night?"

"Nothing," Sam said bitterly. "Since I couldn't find a ticket to that big Linton the Limper fight."

"About that, actually," Freddie said, pulling the tickets out of his pocket. "You wanna go?"

"What?" Sam exclaimed, grabbing the tickets from him. "You _have _tickets to this? Dude, I'm crazy for saying this, but you _rock_!"

"Wow, a compliment from Sam Puckett," Freddie chuckled.

"Wait a minute," Sam frowned, looking closer at the tickets. "How come these are for the couple's section."

"Oh," Freddie said, feeling his face reddening. "See, I-I sort of got us these tickets back when were dating. I had this whole big night planned for us, but, um, we-we sort of broke up."

"You were gonna bring me here?" Sam asked softly. "These tickets must've cost a fortune though."

"I just really wanted us to have an over-the-top date night," Freddie said.

Sam didn't reply.

"But listen," Freddie said quickly. "If you think it will be too uncomfortable, I'll just give you both the tickets. You can call up one of your old juvie buddies or something to go with-"

"Hey, we're both mature, right?" Sam cut him off.

"Well you _did _just throw a bunch of water balloons at Ms. Briggs yesterday, but sure," Freddie said.

"Then we can handle hanging out at a fight as friends," Sam told him. "Just because a guy and a girl go to a fight together doesn't mean it has to be a date. We can make it an anti-date."

"An anti-date?" Freddie repeated.

"Sure," Sam told him. "We'll do the everything opposite as we would normally do on a date. No dressing up, no romantic little comments to each other, no holding the door open for me-"

"Oh, I get it," Freddie grinned. "And I won't pick you up, I'll just meet you here, and we'll each pay for our own food there."

"Well, let's not get carried away with the whole 'paying for ourselves' thing," Sam said. "But yeah, that's the general idea."

Freddie laughed. "That could work. So then, do we have ourselves and anti-date for Friday then?"

Sam chuckled. "Yeah, we do."

…

"So you two really couldn't go out as friends?" Carly asked as shook her hair, making it rather unruly. "You _had _to go and make this an anti-date?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded, pulling on an old pair of sneakers. "This way it's officially _not _a date. I don't want any confusion."

"Okay, but are you really wearing _that _to this anti-date?" Carly asked, staring at Sam's outfit. The blonde was wearing an old T-shirt and jeans with holes in them, along with a pair of muddy sneakers.

"Yeah, on a date, you usually get dressed up," Sam explained. "But since this is an _anti-date_, I don't have to."

"But-But, ugh, never mind," Carly conceded.

There was a knock at the door and Freddie let himself into the apartment. He was dressed just as poorly as Sam, wearing a pair of sweatpants and a ratty jacket.

"You guys look like hobos!" Carly exclaimed.

"Not like we're going on a date, right?" Freddie asked. "Because that's the point."

"But didn't you say you were going to a restaurant to get dinner before the fight?" Carly asked.

"Yeah, so?" Sam shrugged.

"But you can't-" Carly began, but she shook her head. "I give up. Go ahead, make a mockery out of the fashion world."

"Okay then," Freddie said.

"Later, Carls," Sam said as her and Freddie headed out of the apartment.

"We'd better hurry," Freddie said, looking at his watch as the two headed down to the lobby. "The bus is going to be out front any minute."

"A bus?" Sam grinned. "Nice. _Very_ undate-like."

"Only the worst for us tonight," Freddie smiled.

The two arrived outside just as the city bus was pulling up.

It was a very non-romantic ride. The bus was extremely packed, and Sam and Freddie got stuck sitting next to a woman who smelled strongly of old cheese and garlic. They were relieved when they were finally able to get off at Mr. Bibby's all-you-can-eat steak buffet.

"See, now if this was a date," Freddie said as him and Sam sat down at their table. "I probably would've told you five times by now how nice you look tonight."

"Yeah, you were always dishing out the cheesy compliments," Sam nodded. "And if this was a date, I probably would've said that I like you jacket or something."

Freddie chuckled, and hoped Sam didn't notice how much he, for some reason, had to bite his tongue to keep from _really _telling Sam how beautiful she looked right now, despite her outfit and purposely-messed-up hair.

Sam busied herself by digging into her first of many sirloins, trying hard not to stare at Freddie's muscular arms, which his thin jacket was not doing a very good job of covering up.

After their dinner, Sam and Freddie walked across the street to Sam's favorite ice cream parlor.

"You really had some date planned for us back then, huh?" Sam said to Freddie as they ordered their deserts.

"Yeah, I did," Freddie nodded, trying not to sound to depressed about the fact that they never got to do this while they were a couple. "But hey, it's just as cool as an anti-date, isn't it?"

"Definitely," Sam grinned.

They got their desert and sat down at a small table outside the shop.

"I can't wait to get to that fight," Sam said, shoveling her chocolate-fudge delight into her mouth. "I bet it goes down in the top ten MMA fights of all time."

Freddie chuckled. "You know your mouth is _covered _in chocolate ice cream?"

"Huh? Oh," Sam said, grabbing a napkin and wiping off her lips, and Freddie couldn't help but gaze longingly at those lips, which still had a hint of chocolate on them.

"Hey, I bet if this was a date, you would've pulled that super old move where you tell me I have something on my lips and then kiss me," Sam said, tossing the napkin into the trash.

Freddie grinned. "Probably…what a lame line."

"Right?" Sam laughed.

The two were silent for a minute.

"I mean…it probably would've worked," Freddie muttered, finally breaking the silence.

"Yeah, probably," Sam said, showing a small smile. "Hey, you remember that one time when I won that sweepstakes Carly entered me in from one of her makeup magazines and I won that huge set of flavored lip gloss?"

"Oh yeah," Freddie nodded, smiling at the memory. "And we spent the entire day at your place testing to see if I could tell which flavor you put on by kissing you."

"You were pretty good at that, Benson," Sam admitted. "The only flavor you wound up missing was the dragon fruit one."

"Hey, I got it on the second try," Freddie smirked.

The two laughed, but then fell silent again.

"But, um, since this is an anti-date, the-the napkin was just fine," Sam spoke up.

"Yeah, um, it-it was," Freddie nodded. He looked at his watch. "So we should be going…got to be at the arena by eight for the fight."

"Oh, right," Sam said quickly. "Let's go then."

…

"This really must be a big fight!" Freddie said loudly as him and Sam made their way through the crowd at the arena, heading towards their seats in the couple's section. "This place is packed!"

"Of course it is! Linton the Limper's the most popular fighter in the MMA!" Sam yelled over the noise of the crowd.

"I think these are our seats," Freddie said, pointing to two empty chairs. They were surrounded by couples that didn't seem to have anything against public displays of affection.

"I'll try not to gag over everyone swapping spit around us," Sam said, cringing at the couple in front of them.

"Gross, right?" Freddie said, trying to ignore the feeling of envy he felt towards all the couples at this moment.

"Totally, they're probably more interested in each others lips than watching the fight," Sam said, trying hard not to think that if her and Freddie _had _stayed together long enough to be coming here as a couple tonight that they would be doing the same thing right now.

"Yeah, I'm _so _glad we came here as an anti-date," Freddie nodded. "Because if we were on a real date, we'd probably be so distracted that we wouldn't have even noticed, um…that guy over there with the three thumbs."

"Oh, wow, that-that would've been a real shame if we missed that all because we were making out," Sam said. She stretched her legs out in front of her. "And we wouldn't have gotten to enjoy all this leg room either because we'd be practically on top of each other."

"So uncomfortable," Freddie quickly agreed. "I mean, my-my arms probably would've been around you."

"My head probably would've been on your shoulder," Sam said.

"Our legs would be touching," Freddie added.

"And our faces would've been _really _close together," Sam said.

"Like-Like this," Freddie said shakily, suddenly realizing that him and Sam had moved _a lot _closer together in the last few minutes.

"Yeah," Sam whispered, staring into Freddie's eyes, suddenly unaware of what was happening. "Like this."

And then, both of them finally unable to hold back any longer, they closed the small gap of space between their lips, kissing for the first time in months. Freddie quickly pulled Sam closer, still not taking his lips off hers, and Sam laced her arms around his neck, deepening the kiss that she had been trying so hard to convince herself for the past six months that she didn't want.

At last they broke apart, both of them breathing heavily.

"This isn't an anti-date anymore, is it?" Sam asked, catching her breath.

"I don't think I can take anymore of that," Freddie admitted.

"It was so dumb," Sam agreed.

"Almost as dumb as breaking up in the first place," Freddie said.

"Nothing could've been dumber than that," Sam said.

"True," Freddie said as Sam crashed her lips back into his. "So, _so _true."


	273. Chapter 273

_Toothpaste_

"Up!"

"No, Emma, not right now," Sam said to her two-year old daughter as she wiped Ashton's face, which was smeared with peanut butter from her lunch, off with a wet cloth. "Mommy's busy cleaning Ashton right now. Go play with one of your toys in the other room."

"No wash!" Ashton said fussily, squirming her head to try and avoid the cloth. As she squirmed, Ashton knocked over a carton of milk that had been sitting on the kitchen counter.

"Mommy," Sam and Freddie's six-year old son, Jason, said, coming into the room with a board game. "Can you play with me?"

"Um, I can't right now, Jason," Sam replied, scoping Ashton up in one arm and grabbing a handful of paper towels in the other to clean up the spill. "Why don't you ask daddy?"

"Well," Freddie said, coming downstairs. "I finally got whatever it was that the twins got all over their bedroom wall off."

"Daddy," Jason said to his father. "Will you play with me?"

"Sure, buddy," Freddie said. "Let me just-"

"Look!" Emma said, running back into the room, wielding two flattened tubes of toothpaste in her tiny hands. "Me messy!"

And indeed she was; she was covered in toothpaste from head to toe.

"Aw man, she must've been playing in the bathroom," Sam said, still struggling with a squirming Ashton. "It's got to be a mess in there."

"I'm on it," Freddie sighed. "Though I'm sure it can't be much worse than Emma. She's covered in the stuff."

"Here," Sam said, picking up Emma in her other hand. "I'll give them both a bath in our bathroom. Ashton's got peanut butter all over herself anyway."

"No bath!" the girls both began to cry.

"I'll be up in a minute to help you, once I get the toothpaste mess taken care of," Freddie told Sam.

"Okay, but hurry," Sam said as Emma got toothpaste all over her shirt.

Sam and Freddie both hurried off to take care of what they needed to do, both seemingly forgetting about poor Jason, who was still standing in the other room with his board game.

…..

"Emma, no, stop throwing cereal at Ashton," Sam said, handing each of her toddlers a Sippy cup full of juice.

"No milk!" Ashton said firmly, pushing away her cup.

"It's juice, sweetie, see," Sam said, trying to tilt the cup into Ashton's mouth. "Yummy apple juice."

"No apple!" Emma said, banging on her high chair tray.

Sam sighed. "You guys don't like anything, do you? Well when daddy gets home later, I think I'm gonna leave him with you two and mommy's going to go relax."

"No!" the twins both said in unison.

Just then Sam heard a honk outside, which meant that Jason had just been dropped off by his carpool.

"Hey sweetie," Sam said to her son as he walked into the house. "How was school?"

"You and daddy didn't come to my play," Jason said.

"You're play?" Sam frowned. "What play?"

"My presidents play!" Jason replied. "I was George Washington!"

"What? That was _today_?" Sam exclaimed. "I thought it was next week. Today's the…oh. It-It was today. Aw, Jason, I'm sorry. Daddy and I completely forgot about that."

"It's okay," Jason mumbled.

"Hey," Sam said. "I know. Why don't you show me your part of the play right now? That way-"

But suddenly Ashton began crying because Emma had taken her Bambie doll and was biting its leg, and in all the commotion, the lid of Emma's apple juice wound up popping off, sending the drink all over the floor.

"Hey!" Sam said. "Emma! Give her back the doll!" she grabbed a sponge to wipe up the mess just as both the girls pushed their bowls of cereal off their highchair trays.

…

"We forgot his play?" Freddie frowned.

"Yes!" Sam said, laying down on her and Freddie's bed later that night. "He was the only kid whose parents didn't show up!"

"I thought it was next week!" Freddie said. "Today's the…oh."

"He was so sad when he got dropped off today," Sam sighed. "I can't believe neither of us remembered."

"Hey, we're lucky to remember our own names, dealing with the twins lately," Freddie said. "I love them and everything, but they're taking terrible twos to a whole new level. I don't think I sat down once during dinner, I had to keep cleaning _something _up."

"I know," Sam nodded. "They're a handful. But you know what? I think we're so busy with the twins lately that we've sort of been, you know, forgetting about Jason."

"Yeah, you're right," Freddie sighed, sitting down next to his wife. "We really haven't been giving him all too much attention. I mean, we forgot his school play, we haven't been able to read to him at his bedtime for the past few weeks, and every time he wants to play, it always seems like we have to drop everything and deal with the girls."

Sam sighed. "We're terrible parents."

"I feel like one," Freddie mumbled. "Poor Jason…this isn't fair to him."

"Yeah, no chiz," Sam said. "What are we gonna do?"

"I know," Freddie said. "Tomorrow's Saturday. Why don't we call up Carly and ask her to babysit for us? That we can spend the entire day with just Jason, doing whatever he wants."

"Huh," Sam said thoughtfully. "That's a good idea…I think he really needs this baby."

"Yeah, I know he does," Freddie nodded. "So…having more than one kid's a lot harder than we thought, huh?"

"Especially when we wound up with twins," Sam smiled.

Freddie put his arm around her and kissed her. "But as much trouble as they are…they're really worth it, aren't they?"

"Yup," Sam grinned. "Wouldn't trade them for anything."

…..

"Hey, morning," Sam smiled as Jason, still wearing his pajamas, came into the kitchen the next morning. She slid a plate of chocolate chip pancakes, his favorite, in front of him.

"Whoa! Pancakes!" Jason grinned, digging in.

"Yup, and there's bacon frying right now," Sam told him, pouring him a glass of orange juice.

"Where are Emma and Ashton?" Jason asked, looking over at the twins empty high chairs, where they would normally be smearing syrup all over themselves by now.

"Well," Sam said, sitting down next to her son. "Daddy's dropping them off to play with Clarissa at Aunt Carly's right now. She's going to watch them for us all day so that we can spend today doing whatever you want."

"Really?" Jason asked excitedly.

"Really," Sam nodded just as Freddie returned home.

"Hey, he's finally up," Freddie smiled. "Morning, Jason. Did mommy tell you that today's _your_ day?"

"Uh-huh," Sam said. "So what do you wanna do first, Jason?"

"I can pick whatever I want?" Jason asked.

"Whatever you want," Freddie replied.

"Um…can we play my alien game?"

"You bet," Sam said.

"And-And can we get ice cream?"

"Absolutely," Freddie grinned.

"And can we go see the new dinosaur exhibit at the museum?" Jason asked. "I want to see the new stegosaurus skeleton and look at the fossils."

"Whatever you want," Sam said, rustling his hair. "Now go get dressed, sweetie, so we can start."

"Okay!" Jason said, hurrying off to his room.

…

"I don't think I've ever been in museum this long without breaking something," Sam whispered to Freddie as they watched Jason starting, fascinated, at a display of dinosaur eggs.

"Have you ever even been in a museum at all?" Freddie asked her knowingly.

"Once!" Sam defended. "To see some exhibit about chainsaws!"

"Of course," Freddie grinned.

"Oh shut up," Sam smirked. "Anyway, I'm gonna run to the gift store and buy Jason a dinosaur souvenir."

"Okay," Freddie nodded. As Sam left the dinosaur exhibit, Freddie stepped closer to his son.

"You having fun, Jason?"

"Uh-huh," Jason smiled. "This place is cool!"

"I know," Freddie laughed as they walked over a life-size model of a triceratops. "You really love dinosaurs, don't you."

"I wish they were still around," Jason said sadly. "Except for maybe T-rexes. Because they're sort of scary."

"The museum will be closing in five minutes," came a voice over the loudspeaker.

"Aw man," Jason frowned.

"Hey, we'll come here again sometime," Freddie promised him. "But right now we better go get mommy so we can head home."

"Okay," Jason nodded.

Freddie took his hand and led him downstairs to the gift shop, where Sam was waiting with a big bag.

"Hey sweetie, look what I found in there for you," Sam said, pulling a stuffed red dinosaur out of the bag.

Jason's jaw dropped. "Whoa! Thanks!" he grabbed the dinosaur and hugged it.

"What kind of dinosaur is that?" Freddie asked Jason.

"It's a pterodactyl," Jason replied. "It can fly!"

"Wow, _someone's _a little dinosaur expert," Sam chuckled.

"We'd better get going," Freddie said, looking at his watch. "Carly's gonna be dropping the twins back off soon."

"Oh, right," Sam nodded. "Come on, Jason. Time to go home."

…

"How were they?" Sam asked Carly as she took her sleeping twins from her best friend's car.

"Pretty good," Carly replied. "I took them and Clarissa to the park all day, so they ran around the whole time and tired themselves out."

"That works," Sam said.

"You guys have a good time with Jason?" Carly asked.

"Yeah, he said he had a good time," Sam nodded.

"I'm glad," Carly smiled. "Anyway, I should probably get home so I can get Clarissa to bed. I'll see you guys tomorrow."

"Okay, thanks again," Sam said. She headed back into the house with the twins, both still fast asleep.

Once Sam and Freddie put Emma and Ashton in their cribs, they went into Jason's room. He was already in his pajamas, playing with his new stuffed dinosaur.

"Ready for your bedtime story?" Freddie asked.

"Uh-huh," Jason nodded.

"Okay, well daddy and I want to talk to you for a little bit first," Sam told him, setting the six-year old on her lap.

"About what?"

"Well," Freddie began. "We know that lately both of us have been pretty busy taking care of your sisters. And that means that we haven't exactly made a lot of time for you. Which was wrong of us."

"Yeah, it was," Sam agreed. "Which is why we're going to try and work on that. Maybe not every weekend, but every once in awhile we'll have special days where it's just you and us. Would you like that?"

"Yeah!" Jason smiled.

"And you know that even if we _are_ busy with Emma and Ashton," Freddie continued. "We still love you."

Jason nodded. "I love you too."

"And you love your sisters, right?" Sam said. "Even if they take a lot of mommy and daddy's time away from you?"

Jason nodded again. "I like being a big brother."

"And they love having a big brother like you," Freddie grinned. "Now let's read. We have a lot of stories to make up for."


	274. Chapter 274

_Pain_

"Just come tonight, will you?" Carly begged Sam as they sat in their shared office at the television studio where they both worked as writers. "I need all the votes I can get."

"Come on, Carls, you know I hate PTA meetings," Sam moaned. "Besides, I haven't been to _one _this year…or last year."

"But if I want to be PTA president for next year, I need to get more votes than that stupid Angela Benet," Carly pointed out.

"Relax Carls, that lady's a nut job," Sam assured her. "You've got the win in the bag."

"I don't know," Carly sighed. "She always brings some fancy plate to the meetings. Like last week she brought in this roast beef platter with-"

"Whoa, there was a roast beef platter and you didn't mention that to me?" Sam exclaimed. "If you want me at one of those meetings, that's all you've got to say!"

"Well, since it's election night, she's sure to bring something good," Carly smiled. "So will you come and vote for me?"

"Fine," Sam conceded. "Why not?"

Just then Sam's phone rang.

"Ugh, dang telemarketers," Sam moaned, picking up her phone. "They've called three times already this morning."

"So just don't answer," Carly suggested.

"Nah, it's always really funny to try and get them to go off the little scripts they have to read off of," Sam grinned, as she answered her phone. "Hello?"  
"Hello, is this Samantha Benson?" the lady on the other line said.

"Um, yeah?" Sam nodded. Whoever this was, it didn't sound like a telemarketer.

"I have you listed here as the wife of Fredward Benson, is that correct?" the lady asked.

"Yeah," Sam said again. "Why? Who is this?"

"I'm calling from the Seattle Medical Hospital," the lady told her. "And I'm sorry to say that I am calling you because Mr. Benson has you listed as his emergency contact."

"Wait, what?" Sam exclaimed, her heart starting to race. "What's going on?"

"Mrs. Benson," the voice said gently. "I'm very sorry, but I'm calling to inform you that earlier this morning your husband was involved in serious car accident-"

"W-What?" Sam said shakily. "Is he okay?"

"He's in surgery currently," the lady replied. "You will be able to get more information if you come into the hospital and-"

"I'll be there," Sam said at once. "I'm on my way."

"Sam? What's going on?" Carly asked, knowing by her best friend's face that something was very wrong.

"It's-It's Freddie," Sam mumbled, getting to her feet and grabbing her bag. "He's in the hospital…in surgery…car crash…can you cover for me?"

"Yeah, yeah, of course," Carly said quickly. "Go, Sam."

Sam sped to the hospital, trying not to go over the worst-case scenario in her head…when she arrived at the hospital, she ran immediately to the front desk.

"Someone called me about my husband," she said breathlessly to the nurse there. "Freddie Benson?"

"I'm sorry, but he's still in surgery," the nurse replied.

"Well how much longer is he going to be in there?" Sam asked.

"It's hard for me to say," the nurse said. "If you'll have a seat over there, I can send one the doctors to you when they have an update."

"Can you at _least _tell me what happened?" Sam pleaded. "All I know is that he was in a car crash."

"According to the report drawn up when he came in, another vehicle sped through a red light and crashed right into Mr. Benson's car, causing his vehicle to flip over."

"Oh my God," Sam mumbled, running her fingers anxiously through her hair.

"I'm very sorry," the nurse said again, offering Sam a sympathetic smile.

As Sam sat in the waiting room, it felt like the longest three hours of her life. She tried to go over the last time she had seen Freddie. It was at breakfast that morning. Sam had been busy trying to pack the kids lunches while Freddie had been helping their son, Tyler finish up the last of his homework that he had forgotten about the previous night, while stressing about some meeting he had at work. They had both been so busy that morning that Sam didn't even think they got a chance to say bye to each other before Sam drove the kids to school and Freddie headed off to work; the last thing she had said to him was for him to hand her the jar of peanut butter…

Around one in the afternoon, Sam's phone rang, and she saw it was Carly.

"Hey," she said in a voice she barely even recognized.

"Hi," Carly replied gently. "How is he?"

"He's been in surgery for like, five hours," Sam said miserably.

"I-I hope you don't mind, but I told Spencer what happened," Carly said. "And he's in Olympia right now, but he wants to know if you want him to come and sit with you while you wait for news."

"No," Sam said at once. "No, I-I don't want people around right now…"

"I understand," Carly said. "And I'm going to leave early so I can pick your kids up from school, so don't worry about them."

"Thanks," Sam mumbled. "But…don't-don't tell them anything."

"I won't," Carly promised. "Let me know when Freddie comes out of surgery.

Just as Sam hung up her phone, a doctor wearing navy blue scrubs came into the waiting room.

"Samantha Benson?"

"Here," Sam said, not even caring about the use of her full name.

The doctor led her into an empty hallway next to the waiting room.

"How is he?" Sam asked.

"You're husband was very lucky not to have died on impact with the force of the car crash," the doctor told her. "He had severe internal bleeding, we had to remove one of his lungs that was badly punctured by his broken ribs, and he has several broken bones."

"But he's okay now?" Sam asked desperately.

The doctor sighed. "We fixed him up best we could…but right now he's still in a coma."

Sam tried to ignore the numbness that was beginning to creep down her body.

"But-But he'll wake up, right?" she asked. "Right?"

"We just can't say for certain right now," the doctor said softly. "Right now we're estimating that he has a 30 percent chance."

"Of living?" Sam exclaimed. She could feel tears flowing down her face, but she didn't care. All she could think about was Freddie.

"I'm very sorry," the doctor said.

Sam was sick of hearing those words.

"Can I see him?" she whispered, wiping her eyes.

The doctor nodded. He led her up to a small room and opened the door for her.

Freddie was laying there on the white hospital bed, with about a million beeping machines hooked up to him.

Sam didn't like this. She couldn't even imagine how much pain Freddie was in right now…

She slowly walked into the room and sat down on the hard chair next to his bed. For a few minutes, she only stared at him. Maybe the doctors were wrong. Maybe he was only sleeping…

But even as she thought it, she knew it was crazy. Freddie didn't look like this when he slept; he would always have his head cocked slightly to the right and his nose would occasionally twitch. Right now he was just lying motionless.

Sam cautiously reached out her hand and took her husband's.

"Freddie?" she said gently. "Freddie?"

But of course there was no answer, and Sam's heart sunk even lower.

"Freddie, it's me," she said shakily. "You-You need to wake up, okay?"

Again, nothing.

"Freddie," she said once more. "Please. I know it's probably hard, and I don't even know if you can hear me right now, but you have to wake up."

The only sound she got in reply was the steady beeping of one of the monitors.

"Baby," she said in a voice so soft she could barely hear it herself. "Baby, please! Don't do this! Don't!" she was openly crying now. "You can't die! We have four kids you still have to help me raise and see grow up. They still need you, you can't leave them! You can't leave _me_!"

Sam couldn't take it anymore, she had never cried this hard in her life.

"Freddie!" she said loudly. "Come _on_! You're stronger than this! You can wake up, I _know _you can! What am I supposed to do without you, huh?"

She held firmly onto her hands as she continued to sob.

"I love you," she whispered through her tears. "I love you."

And then, she felt a light squeeze on her hand. Her heart jumped, and she stopped crying. She looked down at Freddie's hand that she was holding and saw his fingers grasping hers ever so gently.

She looked up at his face, and saw his eyes were beginning to twitch.

"Freddie?" she said, hardly daring to believe it. "Freddie?"

She heard a moan escape his lips and he slowly opened his eyes.

"Sam?"

"Oh my God," Sam said, throwing her arms around Freddie's neck.

"Ow."

"Sorry!" Sam said, releasing him at once. "Did I hurt you?"

"Everything hurts," Freddie mumbled. "Where am I?"

"You're in the hospital, baby," Sam told him. "Don't you remember?"

"No, what happened?" Freddie frowned.

"You were in a car accident," Sam explained. "And-And then you were in a comma. They-They told me you only had a 30 percent chance of living."

She couldn't help the tears that began to fall again.

"Oh, Sam," Freddie said. "I'm sorry."

Sam smiled as she wiped her eyes. "God…only you would get in a car crash and then apologize for it."

"I-I just didn't mean to worry you like that," Freddie said.

"It's all right," Sam told him, leaning down so that she could kiss him. "But you know, if you could _never_ do this again, that would be great."


	275. Chapter 275

_Mayonnaise _

"So then we can do the Idiot farm girl bit after the bit with Gibby and the tomato," Carly said, jotting her notes for the next iCarly down on her PearPad. "And then we can see if Freddie can edit our new fake movie trailer. You know where he is, anyway?"

"He had to stay after school for something with AV club," Sam explained.

"Hey you guys!" Spencer called from the kitchen. "On your next iCarly, can I show the viewers my new toe massager?"

"You bought a toe massager?" Carly frowned.

"Yeah, you know, because I'm always on my feet," Spencer said.

"You're _never _on your feet," Sam said.

"Um, I'm standing right now, aren't I?" Spencer retorted. "So ha!"

"You're only standing to make a sandwich," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "You're going to add two extra layers of mayonnaise and then take it and go lay in your bed and watch all the _Dancing with Congressmen _episodes you have on the DVR."

"I'm gonna _walk _to my bed," Spencer muttered.

"Anyway," Carly chuckled as Spencer headed into his bedroom. "Freddie finished up the editing on our new Super Bra bit last night."

"I thought he wasn't gonna do that until today," Sam said.

"Yeah, but he ended up coming back over here last night after you left," Carly explained. "Here, look at it. I think he did a pretty good job on it."

She passed Sam the PearPad where the video was playing. Sam watched as her boyfriend, who was playing an innocent candy bar salesman, got beaten up by Gibby, who was dressed up like a witch, only to be saved by Super Bra.

"Hey, this is pretty good," Sam smiled, laughing.

"I know, right," Carly said, moving closer to her best friend so she could watch with her. "Aw, and doesn't Freddie look so cute in those geeky fake nerd glasses?"

"Um, sure," Sam nodded, giving Carly a strange look.

"Knock, knock," Freddie said, letting himself in. "What goes on?"

"We're just going over some iCarly stuff," Carly replied as Freddie sat down next to Sam, and the couple exchanged a quick kiss.

"The Super Bra bit looks good, baby," Sam told him.

"Thanks, Cuteness," Freddie smiled at her. Then he turned to Carly. "Oh, and you know how you were telling me last night how your laptop was starting to slow down when you browsed the web and stuff?"

"Yeah," Carly nodded.

"Well," Freddie said, opening up his backpack. "I pulled a few strings in AV club and got you this." He tossed her a disk. "It's the latest software update for Pearbooks. It should speed up your computer."

"Oh my God, thanks!" Carly grinned, getting up to hug Freddie.

"Eh, it's no problem," Freddie told her.

"So, um, how was AV club?" Sam asked Freddie.

"Fun," Freddie said. "Oh! And guess what? Some kid in there had reservation for Petrozini's tonight with a date, but then his date left him for a soccer player, so he asked me if I wanted to use his reservations. You up for a fancy pants dinner tonight?"

"Um, shoosh yeah," Sam said.

"But we have to edit the rest of the iCarly bits for tomorrow night," Carly reminded them.

"Oh…yeah," Freddie sighed.

"Can't you call the restaurant and ask them to move your reservation to tomorrow or something?" Carly asked.

"Nah, they're booked through the next month," Freddie replied. "But maybe if I give them a tip or something-"

"Hey, um, you-you don't have to do that," Sam said quickly. "We can just order pizza here."

"You sure, Sam?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah," Sam smiled, giving him a quick peck.

"Sorry, if I knew how to edit the videos, I wouldn't hold you guys up," Carly told the couple. "But it's just that the show's tomorrow, and we need to get everything done tonight."

"It's cool," Freddie told her.

"Yeah," Sam mumbled. "Real cool."

…..

"And so then," Gibby told Sam as the two sat at the Groovy Smoothie the next day. "My cat wouldn't even look at me. Talk about rude, right? I mean, just because it's _his_ cat food, doesn't mean I can't have a taste now and then."

"Wow, you have a buttload of problems," Sam said, rolling her eyes and sipping her Mango Kiwi punch smoothie.

"It's my cat's fault!" Gibby defended. He sipped the last of his smoothie. "Hey, should we buy Carly a Strawberry Splat? T-Bo's selling them for half-price, and they're her favorite."

"No," Sam said at once.

Gibby gave her a strange look.

"I mean, jeez, can't we go _one day _without visiting Carly?" Sam snapped.

"Don't you practically _live _at her place?" Gibby frowned. "Did you guys get into a fight or something?"

"No," Sam sighed. "Not exactly…it's just that lately I think that she's been a little…weird."

"Weird how?" Gibby asked.

"I dunno," Sam mumbled. "It's whenever Freddie's around. I mean I know they're best friends and all, but the past few weeks she's sort of been…friendlier. Like she hugs way, _way _more than she _ever _has. She compliments his appearance a lot, and yesterday she totally screwed up Freddie and mine's date we were gonna go on."

"Wow, sounds like someone likes Freddie," Gibby said.

"Of course she likes Freddie, you moron," Sam said. "They're friends."

"Not that like…" Gibby said. "Like _like._ You know, like how the male beavers _like _the female beavers on the Nature Channel."

Sam frowned. "That's crazy, Gib. Carly's my best friend. She wouldn't be crushing on my boyfriend."

Gibby shrugged. "Just putting it out there…Hey, can you look at this thing on my back? I say it's a rash, but Guppy says it's more of a scab."

"And I'm out of here," Sam said, getting to her feet.

….

For the rest of the day, Sam tried to get Gibby's words out of her head. Carly was practically her sister; she wouldn't be trying to woo over her boyfriend.

But the more Sam tried to convince herself of that, the more the facts seemed to make sense.

Finally, unable to take it anymore, Sam left for Bushwell Plaza. When she got to Carly's apartment, she let herself in, only to find Spencer buffing his toenails.

"I-um-" Spencer said, looking embarrassed. "Lot's-Lot's of guys do this."

"Yeah, sure," Sam said. "Where's Carly?"

"Up in her room," Spencer replied.

Sam hurried up the stairs and into her best friend's room.

"Oh, hey Sam," Carly smiled, looking up from the homework she was doing. "You're early. iCarly doesn't start for another hour and a half."

"I know," Sam said. "But um…can we talk really quick?"

"Sure," Carly said, closing her textbook. "What's up?"

"Well, um," Sam began. "Lately-Lately it seems like-"

"Oh wait, I want to show you something really quick," Carly said, heading to her closet. She got a bag and pulled out a _Galaxy Wars _t-shirt. "I got it for Freddie at the mall today. You know, as a thank you for that software update he gave me yesterday. It was really a lifesaver, I don't know how much more of my computer's lagging I could've taken."

"Do you like Freddie?" Sam blurted out.

"Huh?" Carly frowned.

"Don't make me say it again," Sam mumbled, sitting down on Carly's ice cream loveseat.

"Do you mean like _like _him?" Carly asked.

"Yeah," Sam sighed.

"Sam, you're my best friend!" Carly said. "Of course I'm not going after your boyfriend. Besides, Freddie and me? Gross. He's like another brother to me."

"Well then why have you been acting so…overly nice around him lately?" Sam asked.

"I haven't been!" Carly said.

"Oh come on, Carls," Sam said. "It's like you hug him every ten minutes when we're hanging out together, a couple days ago you told him how good he looked in some lame polo shirt he was wearing, and now you bough him a present?"

Carly was silent.

"Carls," Sam sighed. "I know Freddie's like, one of your best friends, and I don't want you to stop being friends with him at all just because we're dating…but even _you _have to admit you've been sort of…you know."

Carly sat down. "Wow…you-you're right."

"So you do like Freddie?" Sam asked nervously.

"No," Carly said at once. "Sam, I know I've been acting sort of…too nice around Freddie, but I seriously don't have any sort of romantic feelings towards him. I swear."

"But then why have you been acting like you have?" Sam asked.

"I dunno," Carly sighed. "Maybe…maybe it's just because I haven't had a boyfriend in months. I think I've just been sort of, you know, lonely."

"Lonely?" Sam repeated.

"Yeah," Carly said. "I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm so happy you have Freddie now, he's an awesome boyfriend, but it's just kind of sad watching you guys be all happy and in love while I spend my nights watching Getflix and eating ice cream."

"Aw, Carls," Sam laughed. "That's crazy! You could get any guy at school."

"But most of them are jerks or weirdos," Carly mumbled.

"Yeah, that's true," Sam said. She got to her feet. "Hey, when I was down at the Groovy Smoothie with Gibby earlier, I saw a few cute guys who looked nice. We have some time before we gotta do iCarly…wanna go see if they're still there?"

"Sam Puckett," Carly laughed. "Are you trying to hook me up? I thought I was the matchmaker of the group."

"Well consider it payment for all the guys you've tried to hook me up with over the years," Sam smiled. "Now do you wanna go try and find a boy or not?"

"Let me just put on some sparkly lip gloss first," Carly said.


	276. Chapter 276

_Hook_

"I don't like this, Sam," Freddie mumbled as he paced back and forth in the living room.

"Me neither," Sam said, not looking up from her magazine. "This ham looks totally airbrushed! This lady's trying to pass this fake deliciousness off as her own!"

"Sam," Freddie frowned. "I'm not talking about meat here!"

"Well then what are you going on about?" Sam sighed, closing her magazine.

"The fact that our fourteen-year old daughter has a _boy _up in her room!" Freddie hissed. "And you seem to be okay with it! You know when I when up there the door was _closed_!"

"Wow, who knows what they're doing then," Sam grinned, enjoying the aggravation in her husband. "They could be up there holding hands, or worse, flirting!"

"Ha, ha," Freddie said dryly. "And why are you so okay with this? I thought we made up a rule for Emma and Ashton that they weren't supposed to have boys in their bedrooms with the door closed, and Ashton's up there stomping all over that rule with that punk kid she's apparently dating."

"Punk kid?" Sam repeated, raising an eyebrow. "Did you _see_ the guy? He's preppier than all of the guys in the Orange Republic catalogue combined."

"He's still a punk," Freddie snapped. "And you know what? Even though you don't seem to care, I'm marching up there right now and telling Ashton she needs to come down here with that kid."

"Dude, chill," Sam said. "Emma's in the room with them."

"Oh," Freddie said, relaxing a bit. "I didn't know that…you could've _told _me!"

"Nah, it was funner seeing you freak out," Sam smiled.

"Bye mom, dad," Emma said, coming down the stairs. "I'm heading to Clarissa's. I'll probably wind up spending the night, so don't wait up."

"Wait, wait, wait," Freddie said. "Why're you leaving Ashton and…_punk kid_?"

"Um, because I'm starting to get pretty nauseous from watching them make-out," she replied.

"What?"

"Kidding," Emma said quickly. "They're only being all flirty…but it's still gross, so I'm leaving."

"_Now _can I run upstairs and drag them down here where I can keep an eye on them?" Freddie asked Sam.

"I think, what'd you call him, punk kid? He said his dad was coming over to pick him up in like, five minutes," Emma grinned. "And his name is Wilbur by the way, Ashton's will kill you if you don't call him by his real name."

"Wilbur?" Sam grinned. "What parent does _that _to their kid?"

"I know, right?" Emma laughed. She turned back to Freddie. "So can I go now?"

"Yeah, fine, go," Freddie sighed. "If he's gonna be leaving in five minutes anyway…"

"You're such an overprotective dad," Sam said, shaking her head, but sill smiling.

"You know," Freddie said. "I miss the days when they hated all boys because they were gross and stupid."

"They were eight," Sam told him, putting an arm around him. "They grew up, baby."

"Yeah…I don't like that."

The doorbell rang, and Freddie got to his feet. "Good, that must be the kid's dad. At least now he'll get out of Ashton's room."

Freddie headed to the door and opened it. When he caught sight of the man who must've been Wilbur's father, he almost did a double take.

"Yes, yes, hello," the man, who was wearing pressed kakis and a pink polo shirt covered in a swearer vest, said, not looking up from his pearphone. "I'm here to collect my son, Wilbur."

"N-Neville?" Freddie exclaimed.

Sam hurried to the door, and the man looked up from his phone nearly dropping it.

"Benson!" Neville Papperman frowned. "This is _your _home?"

"Yes!"

"Hmph, should've known," Neville said snootily. "There was an air of…insuperiority hanging around!"

"Hey Neville, I'd watch it if I were you or you'll be waking to an air of hospital," Sam said menacingly.

"You don't scare me, Sam Puckett," Neville said warningly.

"Really?" Sam asked, knowingly, stepping closer to him.

"Okay, fine, you do!" Neville said quickly, backing away. "But if you lay one finger on me my driver will call the cops!"

"Wait, so Wilbur is _your _son?" Freddie asked, shaking his head, confused. "_Your _son is up there dating _our _daughter?"

"_Your _daughter is dating _my _son?" Neville exclaimed. "Oh _fluffermuffin_! How could he have gone so wrong?"

"Hey, your son is lucky to be dating Ashton," Sam snapped.

"Ha! Your daughter is lucky to be dating Wilbur!" Neville retorted.

"Please," Freddie scoffed. "You're insane if you think that."

"Well I'm not going to allow my son to date the spawn of you iCarlies!" Neville said firmly. "I'm going to put a stop to it this_ instant_!"

"Oh, not if we beat you to it!" Freddie said.

"Yeah," Sam agreed. "So you better-"

"Oh good, you guys met Wilbur's dad," Ashton said as her and Wilbur Papperman came downstairs.

"I-um," Freddie started, looking at the wide smile on Ashton's face as she held Neville's son's hand. She looked happier with him than she had with any other boy Freddie had seen her with.

Sam noticed this too, and she sighed, and plastered on a fake smile. "Yeah, we did."

Sam and Freddie both turned to Neville, who looked like he was about to say something, but shut his mouth at the last minute.

"Well come on then, Wilbur. The driver's waiting and I need to get home; I have plantain chips in the oven."

"Okay," Wilbur nodded. He turned to Ashton. "I'll call you later, okay? Thanks for having me over."

"Thanks for coming," Ashton smiled shyly.

"It was nice meeting you, Mr. and Mrs. Benson," Wilbur said to Sam and Freddie as he headed over to his father.

"Um yeah you too," Freddie said quickly.

Neville gave Sam and Freddie one last evil glare as him and his son turned to head back towards the Benson's driveway where their car was waiting for them.

"Isn't he sweet?" Ashton said to her parents.

"Yeah, real sweet," Sam said. "You-You really like him?"

"Eh, maybe," Ashton shrugged. "I'm not sure yet. But I think I'm gonna go to bed. I'm pretty exhausted. Night!"

"Night sweetie," Freddie said as Ashton climbed back up the stairs.

"Huh, for Neville's kid, that Wilbur's not _terrible_," Sam said. "Weird, yes, but not terrible."

"I didn't have to heart to tell them they couldn't see each other anymore," Freddie sighed.

"Yeah, it looked like Neville lost his nerve too," Sam smiled. "Maybe he does have a heart after all."

"I just can't believe our daughter hooked up with Neville's son," Freddie muttered.

"Hey, you heard what Ashton said, she doesn't know how she feels about him yet," Sam reminded him. "It's not like they're in an official relationship or anything."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Freddie nodded.

"I'm gonna go call Carly," Sam said, giving him a quick kiss. "She'll probably get a kick out of this whole thing."

"Okay," Freddie said. As Sam left the room, Freddie sank back down onto the couch, thinking back to when the twins were still little girls and wishing more than anything that he could go back to those days.


	277. Chapter 277

_Week_

"Oh man, oh man, oh _man_!" Freddie said excitedly, coming into the Shay's apartment, where Carly and Sam were sitting on the couch, watching reruns of _Girly Cow. _"You will never _believe _what just happened!"

"You looked in the mirror and realized just how much of a geek you really are and there's no hope left for you?" Sam asked, not taking her gaze off of the television screen.

"No," Freddie snapped.  
"What happened?" Carly asked, muting the T.V. and turning to face Freddie.

"Well, _I _just got an amazing opportunity that will help my future a _lot_," Freddie said. "How you coming on planning _your _future, Sam? Ms. I-Only-Applied-To-One-School."

"Hey, I applied to _two_," Sam defended.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't know you actually had to apply to the Seattle Delinquency Academy."

"Hey! You better-"

"Guys!" Carly said loudly. "Could you not fight? My God, you're acting like animals!"

"She started it," Freddie mumbled.

"And I'm finishing it," Carly said firmly. "Now tell us your big news that's apparently so good for your future."

"I just got offered a really amazing internship at this local tech store," Freddie grinned. "It specializes in computer updates, virus protections, all sorts of things. I'm gonna be responsible for taking care of a lot of the equipment that really big companies bring in there to have fixed. Isn't that insane?"

"Wow, that does sound really cool, doesn't it Sam?" Carly smiled.  
"Eh, 'cool' and anything Benson's associated with don't really mix well," Sam shrugged.

"You know what? I'm in too good of a mood to let you bother me today, Sam," Freddie said.

"I never knew you even applied for any internships," Carly said.

"That's the best part," Freddie told her. "I _didn't _apply. The owner of the store came to _me_ and said that he heard that I was really good with technology and that he'd love to have me intern with him. I start next week! And, it gets even better, this guy went to _MIT_! If I can get him to like me, he might be able to put in a good word with the dean of admissions there and help me boost my chances of getting in!"

"Oh my God!" Carly exclaimed. "I'm so proud of you, Freddie. We should do something to celebrate. Spencer's out picking up smoothies right now, I'm gonna tell him to swing by the bakery and pick up some cupcakes. No, no. This is _cake_ big. I'll even have him get the special frosting on it."

"Yup, this really is perfect," Freddie said happily, sitting down on the chair next to the couch as Carly dialed Spencer's number on his phone.

"Yeah, I'll bet your lame pals in AV club will be _real _excited," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Ha, ha," Freddie said dryly. "And don't you get any ideas about ruining this for me like you did my Pear Store job. There's no _way _this place would _ever_ let you work there. They don't sell anything, they only help their clients with tech problems and work on developing new updates and stuff, so you won't be able to wow the boss with your abrasive sales techniques. Nope, the only way this place will hire you is if you've got the intellect of a computer wiz."

"Get over yourself, Fredgut," Sam said. "You got an _internship_. You don't even get paid."

"Aw," Freddie grinned. "Is someone jealous that something went my way?"

"You're really asking for it, aren't you?" Sam warned him. She got to her feet and headed upstairs. "Just remember…you won't be that good typing on a computer if your fingers are broken."

…..

"Wow, you're really good," Freddie's boss, a large Italian man, said to him as he typed quickly into a Pearbook that a businessman had dropped off for an update.

"Thanks," Freddie smiled.

So far, his first week as an intern at the tech company had been going just as well as he had hoped. His boss was nice, the customers were actually semi-competent about computers and understood him when he explained about processors and data launchers, and, best of all, Sam hadn't been in yet to try and embarrass him.

He supposed he had been a little hard on Sam, rubbing the internship in her face like he did the other day, but it wasn't as if she had actually been upset by what he had said. After all, she _was_ Sam Puckett; that girl was like a brick wall when it came to that stuff.

"You know," Freddie's boss continued. "I'm really glad I took that advice and gave you this internship. You've been _very _helpful."

"Advice?" Freddie asked. "You mean someone actually _advised _you to hire me?" Well this gig just kept getting better.

"Sure," his boss shrugged. "My niece. I was talking to her one night and mentioned I could use some help around the shop, and she told me you'd be perfect for an internship here. She showed me some of the stuff you did on that and I was sold just like that. One of the best decisions of my life, if I do say so myself. I'll have to remember to thank her for the recommendation next time I see her."

"Oh, so your niece is an iCarly fan then?" Freddie asked.

His boss gave him a strange look. "My niece is Sam Puckett."

Freddie almost dropped the Pearbook he was working on. "What?"

"Yeah, didn't you know?" his boss said.

"I-I-I didn't-"

"Well, looks like it's just about lunchtime," his boss said, looking at his watch. "I'm going to go pick up some sandwiches. But hey, when I get back, I'm going to call one of my old professors from MIT who just so happens to be on the admission panel this year and maybe let it slip that a certain applicant is a _fine_ young man who defiantly knows his way around a computer."

"That-That would be incredible, thank you," Freddie said.

"No problem," he replied kindly.

Freddie was still in shock as his boss left the shop. _Sam _had gotten him this internship? Sam, his ex-girlfriend and frienemy? And even stranger, didn't even _tell _him she had done it, as a way of having him in his debt?

He shook his head, still confused. What the heck was going on?

…..

"Sam!" Freddie said, knocking on Sam's front door the next morning. "Sam!"

"Dude!" Sam snapped, answering the door. She was still wearing her pajamas and her hair was a mess. "It is _eight o'clock in the morning_! What could you _possibly _want?"

"Your uncle is the one who owns the tech shop?" Freddie asked.

Sam looked at the ground. "Uh…what-what tech shop?"

"The one where I intern!"

"Okay fine, yes," Sam admitted. "He's one of the few in my family who didn't wind up in prison."

"And you _recommended _me to him?" Freddie questioned.

"Maybe," Sam mumbled.

"Why?" Freddie asked. "That's so…unlike you."

"Well when he came over here for dinner the other night, he just kept going on and on about how he could use an extra body over at his shop," Sam sighed. "I mean what was I supposed to do? Send him Gibby?"

"I just-I just never would've thought you'd do something this nice for me," Freddie said.

Sam rose an eyebrow. "Why?"

"Well…because," Freddie said, as though he was stating something completely obvious. "You hate me."

Sam stared at him for a long time before she finally replied. "I don't know what _you _heard in the elevator that night," she said softly. "But I'm _pretty _sure I didn't say 'I hate you'."

Freddie blinked as the memory of that night came rushing back to him; those three words they exchanged. "Oh."

Sam gave him a small smile. "And anyway, my uncle's apparently pretty influential at MIT. Well, actually, not with one department…he did something…he's a Puckett after all. But with your grades, iCarly, and his recommendation, you're a lock for that school. And I'm gonna need to have someone who's all successful in their life so I can mooch money off them every once in awhile. You know, since apparently my future's not looking quite as good."

"Sam," Freddie sighed. "Come on, you-you know I didn't mean that. It was wrong of me to say."

"Wasn't _that _wrong," Sam muttered.

"Sam," Freddie said firmly. "You're _going _to have a future. You'll be successful, I know it. Hey, what's that other college you said you applied to, I never asked. I know the one was Washington State with Carly, but what's the second one?"

Sam chuckled. "A culinary school in New York."

Freddie smiled. "Staying close to food, huh?"

"Of course," Sam replied.

"Well, anyone as passionate about food as you are would be an awesome chef," Freddie told her sincerely.

"You mean that?" Sam asked.  
Freddie nodded. "I do."

Sam smiled. "Well…thanks. But seriously dude, it's eight in the morning. I'm going back to bed."

"Oh, right, sorry," Freddie said.

Sam rolled her eyes as she turned to head back into the house.

"Oh, and Sam?" Freddie said quickly.

"What?"

"Thanks."


	278. Chapter 278

_Resolution_

"This going to be so much fun!" Carly grinned as she pulled a few DVDs out of her bag. "Just the three of us hanging out, relaxing, just like the old days."

"Yup, all the kids living on their own; we have the place to ourselves," Sam said. "I'm gonna order a pizza, what do you want?"

"Oh, no pizza for me," Carly said. "My New Years resolution was to eat healthier, so I'm cutting out junk food."

"Carls," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "There's no such thing as a 'healthy' relaxing night in."

"Ugh, fine," Carly said. "Get me pepperoni."

"That's my girl," Sam said. "Yo nub, what do you want on your pizza?"

"Pepperoni's fine," Freddie replied as he entered the room. "Did you girls pick a movie yet?"

"I brought a good variety this time," Carly said, handing him the pile of DVDs she had brought. "I've got comedy, romantic comedy, plain romance, tragic romance-"

"Put in the comedy," Sam said at once. "I'm not sitting through another movie where the characters just spend the whole time talking about how 'lovely their love is'."

Just then, the front door of the Benson's home opened up, and Sam and Freddie's grown daughter, Emma, walked in.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" Freddie asked.

"Just stopping by," Emma replied. "What are you all doing?"

"Watching a movie," Sam said. "If you wanna wait twenty minutes, we just ordered pizzas."

"Eh, can't," Emma said. "I have a date with Quincy, and I'm gonna assume I'm gonna get food on it. I don't really know where we're going."

"He didn't tell you?" Carly asked.

"Nah, he said he wanted tonight to be some special surprise, or some chiz like that," Emma shrugged. "So that's why I came over here. Mom, can I borrow that gold locket you have? It would look good with this dress."

"Um yeah, sure," Sam nodded. "It's on my dresser."

"Thanks," Emma said as she hurried upstairs.

"Hey," Freddie said softly to Sam. "She's going on a special date with Quincy? Think tonight's gonna be the night he-"

"Holy crab, that's right!" Sam exclaimed. "It has to be! Oh my God!"

"What?" Carly asked.

"Okay, Carls, we'll tell you," Sam said. "But you have to act calm and cool, okay? Emma can't know yet."

"Alright, alright, what?" Carly demanded. "Tell me!"

"Quincy's gonna propose to Emma," Freddie grinned.

"What?" Carly exclaimed.

"Shhh!" Sam hissed. "Quiet!"

"Oh my God!" Carly whispered excitedly. "This is so huge! But wait, how do you know?"

"A couple weeks ago, Quincy came over and asked Freddie for permission to ask her," Sam explained.

"Aw! That's so romantic!" Carly smiled.

"Just don't give anything away when Emma comes back down," Freddie said. "We don't want to ruin the surprise."

"Don't worry, I'll be totally cool," Carly said.

"Okay, well, I'm out of here," Emma said, returning back downstairs wearing the necklace she just borrowed from her mother. "I'll see you later."

"Bye, have fun tonight," Sam said to her.

"Yeah, and, you know, we'll probably be up for awhile here," Carly said. "So you know, if you wanna come back here after your date and give us some…details, that'd be great."

"What?" Emma frowned as Sam elbowed Carly in the ribs.

"Nothing," Freddie said quickly. "Have a good time sweetie."

"Way to almost give it away, Carls," Sam said once Emma had left.

"I can't help it, okay?" Carly grinned. "Your daughter's getting married! To Gibby's son! I can't wait to start all the wedding preparations. I mean, she _will _let me help with that, right? Oh, now I'm too excited, I need some diet soda."

"So," Freddie said to Sam as Carly ran off into the kitchen. "This is then…our baby's gonna get married."

"Yup," Sam smiled. "She is."

…

It was close to one later that evening, and Sam, Freddie and Carly were still sitting in the Benson's living room.

"Emma's been out for almost seven hours," Carly mumbled as she handed Sam a fake hundred dollar bill from landing on her property in the game they were playing.

"Chill, Carls," Sam said. "You're freaking out about this more than Fredpus and I are."

"Maybe they'll tell us tomorrow," Freddie suggested, rolling the dice and moving his race car piece.

"But I want to hear the news _now_," Carly pouted.

"Poor Clarissa when _she _gets engaged," Sam chuckled. "Carly's gonna want to be right there with her when it happens."

"Ha, ha," Carly said dryly.

"You don't think Quincy chickened out?" Freddie asked. "Or-Or Emma said _no_ do you?"

"No!" Carly gasped.

"Oh come on," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Just because Emma hasn't run back here yet to tell us Quincy proposed to her and they're gonna get married doesn't mean it didn't happen. I mean when _we_ got proposed to, Carls, we didn't run home and tell our parents, did we?"

"No," Carly admitted. "I guess that's true. I mean after most people get engaged, they go somewhere close by and romantic and-"

"Ahem!" Freddie said loudly.

"Hug," Sam finished for her. "They hug."

"Well, either way," Freddie yawned. "It's getting pretty late, and I'm exhausted, so I think I'm-"

But just then the front door slammed open and Emma came running in.

"You guys!" she said excitedly. "Good, you're all still up. Guess what?"

"What?" Sam asked, smiling as she noticed that her daughter had one hand in her jacket.

Emma pulled out the hand she had been hiding, revealing a sparkling engagement ring. "Quincy proposed," she smiled.

"No way!" Sam exclaimed, pulling Emma into a hug. "Congratulations, sweetheart. I'm so happy for you."

"So am I," Freddie said, hugging his daughter as well. "Quincy's a really lucky guy."

"So…now I'm allowed to freak out, right?" Carly asked.

"Sure, Carls," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Thank you," Carly said. "Oh my God! Emma! This is huge! You're getting married!"

"I know," Emma laughed.

"Hey, where's Quincy?" Sam asked.

"He's waiting for me over at Ashton and Clarissa's apartment," Emma replied. "We went over there first to tell them the news, since the beach where he proposed was only ten minutes from them. I'm heading back over there now and we're all going out to celebrate, but I just wanted to come over here and tell you guys the news first."

"Well thanks," Freddie said, kissing the top of her head. "But don't keep the others waiting."

"Tomorrow your dad and I will take the two of you out for dinner," Sam told her.

"And I'll drop off some bridal catalogues for you," Carly said.

"Thanks," Emma grinned. "I'll see you all tomorrow then, I guess."

"Bye, Em," Sam replied as Emma hurried out of the house again.

"Oh, you guys, you must be so proud," Carly said, turning to Sam and Freddie.

"Yeah," Freddie smiled. "We are."


	279. Chapter 279

_Cell_

"This guy's really paying you six _thousand _bucks for this sculpture?" Freddie asked Spencer as he watched the man carefully sculpt a large strawberry.

"Yup," Spencer said happily, dipping his paintbrush into some paint.

"What's he even going to do with a giant strawberry?" Freddie questioned.

"It's a gift for his pet monkey," Spencer replied.

"Man…rich people are always the weirdest," Freddie said, shaking his head.

"I know, works out great for me," Spencer said. "Hey, where are Carly and Sam?"

"Oh, they stayed after school to help Wendy get some gum out of her hair," Freddie explained. "Her and Sam were trying to hit the back of Ms. Brigg's head during English today, and well, a clump got stuck, I guess."

"Gross," Spencer cringed. "Hey tonight you wanna help me rub strawberry lotion all over this bad boy? You know, to give it a nice strawberry scent."

"Um, as tempting as that sounds, I'm gonna pass," Freddie said. "Sam and I are gonna go get some pizza at this new Italian place her cousin just opened now that he got out of prison."

"I thought you were scared of Sam's relatives," Spencer said.

"No," Freddie said firmly. "As Sam's boyfriend, it's important for me to get to know her family well, and that means laying aside any…frightened feelings I might have towards them."

"You're still scared stiff, aren't you?"

"Sam promised to protect me," Freddie mumbled.

Just then the apartment door opened and Carly walked in.

"Hey, you guys get the gum out of Wendy's hair?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah, but her bangs will probably never be the same," Carly sighed. "I made her and Sam both promise to stop trying to hit teachers with anything sticky, though."

"I'm sure that promise will last a whole four hours," Freddie chuckled. "Hey, where _is _Sam anyway?"

"Oh…she went home," Carly said. "She's sort of in a bad mood."

"How come?" Freddie asked, concerned.

"Well, while we were helping Wendy, Mr. Grossmann posted the partner assignments for our biology project on his website."

"And you two didn't get paired together?" Spencer guessed.

"Well, no," Carly said. "But we expected that; that's not why she's in a bad mood."

"Well then why's she upset?" Freddie asked. "Should I go over and see if she wants to talk?"

"Nah, she'll be fine, she just needs to punch some pillows," Carly explained. "She's upset about who she _does _have to work with."

"Who does she have to work with?" Spencer asked.

"Valarie," Carly sighed.

"Who?" Freddie asked.

"Are you _kidding _me?" Carly exclaimed. "Your ex-girlfriend, Valarie!"

"Oh, I didn't know she had that class with you," Freddie frowned.

"Well she does," Carly said. "And ever since you and Sam got back together, she's been shooting Sam these evil stares and everything."

"Sam never told me that," Freddie said.

"Well, it never really bothered her," Carly said. "Sure, she always _hated _Valarie, but she was pretty good at just ignoring her…except for that one time she managed to get a live lizard in her hair. But anyway, now she's going to be _forced_ to talk to Valarie and meet up with her, and she's just peeved off."

"Wow, your ex-girlfriend and current girlfriend, working on a project together," Spencer grinned at Freddie. "Talk about nightmares."

"I told Sam she could work on the project with Valarie here," Carly said. "You know, so she wouldn't have to deal with her alone. They're coming over here tomorrow."

"I'm gonna go see Sam," Freddie said, grabbing his jacket. "I'll see you guys later."

"Bye," Carly said. She turned to Spencer. "Hey! That's my strawberry scented lotion!"

…..

"Sam?" Freddie said, letting himself into her house. "You here?"

"What?" Sam called from her living room. Freddie headed into the room and saw his girlfriend sitting on her couch with her slingshot, shooting at a line of empty soda cans perched on top of her T.V.

"What are you doing?" Freddie asked.

"Working on my aim," Sam said simply, shooting at the middle can, which flew off the T.V.

"Ah," Freddie nodded.

"What are you doing here?" Sam asked. "I thought we weren't gonna go out until dinnertime."

"What? A boyfriend can't surprise his girlfriend with a visit every once in a while?" Freddie smiled, giving her a quick kiss.

Sam gave him a knowing look.

"Look," Freddie sighed. "Carly told me you got stuck working on your biology project with Valarie."

"So?" Sam shrugged.

"Well, that's gotta be awkward," Freddie said.

"Baby, we all know I can handle your prissy little ex-girlfriend," Sam said.

"Of course I know that," Freddie said, putting his arm around her. "But I also know that Valarie can be sort of a…skunkbag."

"Yeah no chiz," Sam said. "But I told you, I can handle her. We're doing this stupid project at Carly's tomorrow and then I'll be done with her. No big deal. And if she tries to pull anything, well, she'll be waking up under water the next day."

"You sure you'll be okay?" Freddie asked.

"Yes, nub," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Okay," Freddie said. "So what do you wanna do until we go get dinner?"

"Well," Sam said. "There's nothing on T.V., I'm _definitely_ not starting homework, and I'm just about out of soda cans, so looks like there's only one thing _for _us to do."

"I think I can guess what it is," Freddie grinned as he leaned towards Sam and kissed her deeply.

….

"When's Valarie coming up?" Carly asked Sam the next day.

"In a few minutes," Sam mumbled.

"Okay, well when she comes up, just try and be…civil," Carly said.

"Why?" Sam exclaimed. "You hate her too, don't you?"

"Of course I hate her!" Carly said. "She tried to shut down iCarly and take over the web with her own stupid web show. But you need to get this project done, Sam. You're barely averaging a C in biology now. Do you want to spend the summer retaking it in summer school?"

"You act more like my mom than my real mom does," Sam said.

There was a knock on the door.

"Remember, _civil_!" Carly said again as she crossed over to the door. She opened it up and revealed Valarie.

"Hello," Carly said.

"Hi," Valarie replied snippily, crossing her arms. "Is Sam here or what?"

"Right in here," Carly said, letting the girl into her home.

Sam glared at Valarie as she came in, but said nothing.

"Okay, well, I'm gonna go upstairs and work on my own homework," Carly said, already feeling the tension building up in the room. "If you guys need anything, let me know."

Sam watched as Carly ran upstairs, trying to ignore the urge to grab her butter sock from her backpack.

"Look, let's just get this done, okay?" Sam finally said. "I don't want to be around you more than you want to be around me."

"Fine," Valarie snapped, grabbing her biology book from her backpack. "We're supposed to make a model of an animal cell out of everyday items…God, this sounds stupid."

"Just go through all this chiz that Carly found for us to work with," Sam mumbled, dumping a large bag of art supplies out on the floor.

"Man I wish we could've picked our own partners for this thing," Valarie groaned as she began sifting through the supplies.

"Yeah, because if I had it my way, I'd be working with _you_," Sam retorted.

"Please, you should be happy to work with anyone who hasn't failed the last three tests in this class," Valarie said, rolling her eyes. "You should be _thrilled_ to be working with me, who always aces biology tests. It's _me _who has the right to complain; you're gonna wind up costing me my grade in that class."

"You mean that you took _last semester_ and _failed_, which is why you're in it this semester?" Sam smirked.

Valarie narrowed her eyes. "You better watch it."

"No, _you'd_ better watch it," Sam said loudly.

"I'm so scared," Valarie said sarcastically. "You know, it still amazes me that a girl like you could ever get s guy like Freddie."

Sam felt her fists clench. She knew Valarie would bring up Freddie…

"Jealous?" Sam said.

"If I wanted that loser nerd back, I could have him," Valarie scoffed.

Sam took a step closer to her. "Hey! Don't talk about him like that!"

"Did I hit a nerve?" Valarie smirked.  
"I'm gonna hit more than a nerve if you don't-" Sam yelled, but then the apartment door opened.

"Hey, what's going on in here?" Freddie asked. "I can hear yelling from my apartment and-oh." He had forgotten that Valarie was going to be here. "Hey Valarie," he mumbled.

"Freddie," she huffed, crossing her arms. "Your girlfriend's a complete monster. She's been starting fights with me ever since I got here and she's going to completely _ruin _this biology project for me. I know your taste in girlfriends is a little terrible, but will you _please_ do something about her?"

"I didn't start any fights, _you _were the one who started them!" Sam exclaimed.

"Oh right, like anyone would believe _that_," Valarie said.

"Actually, I do," Freddie said, walking over to Sam to put around her. "I don't know who you think you are, Valarie, but nothing gives you the right to treat Sam like this. I know you; you're manipulative, a liar, and a sneak. Sam's aggressive, yeah, but she's also honest at least, and I _know _she wouldn't start anything with you just for the heck of it. And since you're still standing, I know she didn't fight you."

Valarie glared at the couple. "You know what?" she snapped. "You can do this project without me. I'm done."

And with that, she stormed out of the apartment.

"Ugh, thank God," Sam said as Valarie slammed the door after herself.

"What happened between you guys?" Freddie asked.

"Eh, she just started going on about how much she didn't want to do the project with me because I would bring her grade down, and how I'm such a _horrible _girlfriend for you," Sam shrugged. "Pretty much exactly what I expected. Honestly, if Carly wasn't right upstairs now, I probably _would've_ hit her."

"Well I'm proud of you that you didn't," Freddie told her. "And don't let what she said bother you, baby. You wouldn't have brought her grade down, and more importantly, you're at least a fifty times better girlfriend than she is."

"I know," Sam said, leaning up to kiss him. "The only thing that sucks now is that I have to this whole lame project on my own."

"No you don't," Freddie said, sitting down in front of the pile of supplies. "You got me."

"You're not even in the class," Sam grinned, sitting down next to him.

"I took it last year and got an A on this project," Freddie shrugged. "I know what Grossmann's looking for."

"Don't you have your own homework to be doing?" Sam asked.

"I can do it tomorrow morning," Freddie told her. "Now come on, let's get this done."


	280. Chapter 280

_Pot_

Carly yawned as she headed downstairs. She could hear a racket going on in the kitchen, which is what had woken her up. She assumed Spencer was up starting his day with a Spencer-like activity already.

"Spencer," Carly yawned as she walked into kitchen. "Spencer, what the heck are you-Sam?"

"Oh, hey Carls," Sam said as she slid something into oven. "About time you got up. How late do you _sleep_?"

"Sam, it's eight thirty," Carly frowned. "I don't think _you've_ even been conscious at eight thirty on a weekend your entire life. How long have you been over here?"

"Um, since six, I think," Sam said, pouring something from a pot on the stove into a baking dish. "Maybe earlier."

"Okay, so would you _like_ to explain why you've been up all morning baking?" Carly asked.

Sam shrugged. "I thought I'd make Freddie some of his favorite things…I've got those vanilla cupcakes he likes in the oven, I'm almost done with this fudge, there are chocolate chip cookies on the counter and I'm just about to start on some lasagna for him."

Carly went over to Sam and felt her forehead. "You feeling okay?"

"What? Yeah," Sam said. "Why?"

"Because since when do you do something so…nice for your boyfriend?" Carly asked.

"Come on," Sam said. "I do nice things for him."

"Well, sure," Carly admitted. "I mean, you don't beat him up as much anymore, and give him that weekly compliment, and you do…other _things_ that make him pretty dang happy, but this? Surprising him with a ton of homemade food? This sort of seems like something _Freddie _would do for _you_."

"I know," Sam nodded. "Which is why I'm doing this sort of…I mean, just the other day the nub went and bought me a rose for every day we've been together; how does he come up with that chiz?"

"Aw," Carly smiled. "That's the sweetest thing ever."

"I know," Sam mumbled. "So _obviously _I have to even the playing field here."

"Ugh, leave it to you to make this into a competition," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "But I still think it's really cute that you're doing all this for Freddie."

"Thanks…anyway, can you just sort of make sure that Freddie doesn't come over here all day?" Sam asked. "I don't want him to see everything before it's ready."

"Um, sure," Carly nodded. "What do you want me to do with him?"

"I dunno, go get smoothies or do homework at the place with all the books, what's that called again?"

"The _library_?" Carly chuckled.

"Yeah, there," Sam said.

"Okay, no problem," Carly said. "Just text me when you want me to bring him back over here."

"Cool, thanks," Sam replied.

"So," Carly said, picking up a batter covered spoon from the sink and beginning to lick it. "Is there any _occasion_ you're being all romantic for? Anniversary? His grandparents birthday or something?"

"Nah, not really," Sam smiled. "But he was sort of stressed yesterday; he was working on his college applications all day and then his teacher assigned some huge physics project to him and when he got home he found his mom in his bedroom trying to superglue all his things to the floor so he couldn't leave her next year. I figured this would sort of make him feel a little better."

Carly grinned. "You love your boyfriend."

"Shut up," Sam mumbled, blushing.

…

"Man, I can't believe we spent all day at the library," Freddie sighed as him and Carly walked back to their apartments. "And I barely got anything done!"

"What are you talking about?" Carly frowned. "You finished the history report we had to do on World War II, you did about three-fourths of your physics project _and _you finished your admissions essays for three of the colleges your applying for!"

"I know," Freddie sighed. "I just have so much to do lately; I've been really stressed. Applications are due next month, all of our teachers at school are piling so much work on us, I have all our iCarly stuff, plus I have to deal with my psycho mom, who has been trying non-stop to convince me to stay home and go to college over the Internet so I don't have to leave her."

"I know, that's rough," Carly said, giving him a sympathetic smile.

"Anyway, I'm beat," Freddie yawned. "I think I'm gonna call Sam really quick and then go to bed. I'll see you for iCarly rehearsal tomorrow."

"Wait, um, come in here for a second," Carly said, nodding over at her apartment.

"Why?" Freddie asked.

"Because, um, I think Spencer wanted to ask you some guy question," Carly lied quickly.

Freddie cringed. "Do I _want _to hear it?"

"Oh just come on," Carly said, grabbing his wrist and pulling him through the door.

The lights were dimmed in the apartment; Sam had lit a bunch of candles. She was standing by the table, which was covered in the food she had spent all day making, wearing a purple dress.

"What's going on?" Freddie asked, confused.

"You two have fun," Carly smiled, heading back out the door. "I'm gonna give you guys some private time."

"Sam?" Freddie frowned as Carly closed the door behind her.

"You like it?" Sam asked, stepping towards Freddie and giving him a long kiss.

"Well…yeah!" Freddie said once they pulled apart. "But, did _you _do all this?"

"Uh-huh," Sam nodded, taking his hand and leading him to the table. "I made all your favorite things."

"Whoa, this must've taken all day," Freddie grinned.

"Yeah, well," Sam shrugged. "Come on, let's eat. You have _no _idea how hard it was waiting for you to get back to stuff my face."

"I'm still confused," Freddie said as he spooned some lasagna onto his plate. "Why'd you do all of this for me?"

"Because," Sam said, grabbing some garlic bread. "You've been really stressed out between school and applying for college and your mom…I thought you could sort of use something to get your mind off of everything for awhile."

"Well it definitely worked," Freddie told her. "Thanks Sam. I really needed this."

"Come on, you do chiz like this for me all the time," Sam told him.

"Still, I really appreciate it," Freddie told her, smiling. He took her hand. "You know you're the best girlfriend, right?"

Sam rolled her eyes. "And you know you're the sappiest boyfriend, right?" She leaned over and kissed him. "But I love you anyway."


	281. Chapter 281

**AN-Sorry this one's so long; I've been trying to make my oneshots a little shorter lately, but I guess I kind of slipped with this one. **

…

_Witch_

"I still can't believe you managed to glue Mr. Bradley's _shoes_ to the floor," Carly said, shaking her head as her and Sam opened their lockers. "While he was still _wearing _them!"

"It's a gift," Sam said modestly, tossing her books carelessly into her locker and grabbing a large bag of potato chips.

"Hey," Gibby said, walking over to the girls. "Did you hear that some kid glued Mr. Bradley's shoes to the floor? The fire department's on their way here to unstick him."

Carly pointed at Sam.

"Ah," Gibby nodded.

"Hey, how was your history test?" Carly asked. "You and Freddie just took it, right?"

"Yeah, it was pretty easy," Gibby said. "But there were a lot of trick questions; like when did the War of 1812 take place."

"Um, in 1812," Sam said. "Dude, even _I _know that."

"When did you think it was fought?" Carly chuckled.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, that's a _war_?" Gibby frowned. "I thought it was a document that was just, you know, really intense, like a war."

"Gibby," Carly sighed. "Promise me you'll never try and do extreme gymnastics on a trampoline the night before a test again, okay?"

"Oh, but guess what?" Gibby said, ignoring Carly's comment. "Everyone in our class finished the test early, so our teacher let us spend the rest of the class just talking. You know that new girl that moved here from Utah? Jennifer?"

"Sure," Sam shrugged. "What about her?"

"She scooted her desk right next to Freddie and started talking to him," Gibby replied. "Right in the middle of our conversation on shoelaces! Can you believe that?"

"I didn't know Freddie was friends with her," Carly said.

"He isn't," Gibby said. "It was the first time they talked ever. She asked him what she got for a question on the test, and then somehow they wound up talking about _Galaxy Wars _and computers! They left me to have my shoelace conversation on my own!"

"Huh, I guess they have a lot in common then," Carly sad.

"Yeah, that their both geeks," Sam mumbled.

"I guess Freddie thought so too," Gibby shrugged. "Because he asked her out."

Sam nearly choked on her chips.

"He _what_?" Carly exclaimed as she hit her best friend's back.

"Apparently they're getting smoothies today after school," Gibby said.

"Are you _kidding_?" Sam said, still coughing. "He asked out some random chick that he just met today?"

"Yeah, that doesn't really seem like Freddie, he's not exactly Mr. Confident around girls," Carly said.

"I know, that nub's a total spaz around chicks," Sam said.

"But _you _dated him," Gibby pointed out.

"Gibby!" Sam snapped.

…

"Hey, Spencer," Carly sighed as she came home from school that day.

"Hi!" Spencer replied loudly.

Carly frowned as she stared at her brother, who was covered from head to do in multi-colored paint.

"Did a rainbow explode on you?" she asked.

"Oh no, Socko and I were just playing paintball," Spencer explained.

"Did you win?"

"…I don't want to talk about," Spencer mumbled. "Hey where're Sam and Freddie?"

"Well Sam claimed she had to go take her mom to a doctor about some growth, and Freddie…he's on a date."

"A _date_?" Spencer repeated. "With _who_?"

"Some new girl that came to Ridgeway a couple weeks ago," Carly said. "I don't know her too well, but she seems nice I guess. Pretty."

"Wait…does _Sam _know about this?" Spencer asked.

"Yeah, she knows," Carly said. "I asked her if she was okay with this after we found out, and she _said _she was. But it's always a little weird when your ex dates someone new. It must be even _weirder _when your still friends with your ex. I think she just needs a little time on her own right now; I'll call her tonight and make sure she's okay."

"Alright," Spencer said. "I'm gonna go shower and try to get this paint out of my nose."

…..

Later that evening, Carly was sitting out on the couch doing some homework when Freddie walked in.

"Hey," he said. "I was looking for you and Sam after school; where were you guys?"

"Well, we figured you'd be all right if we left without you," Carly said, smiling at him. "Because word from the Gibby is you've got yourself a new little girlfriend."

"Oh, he-he told you?" Freddie asked somewhat awkwardly.

"Yeah," Carly said. "Oh come on, don't be embarrassed. Come, sit, talk. What's this Jennifer like?"

"She seems really…cool," Freddie replied, sitting down next to Carly. "She's really into _Galaxy Wars _like me, and he dad taught her how to take apart a computer when she was five. Plus she's really nice, and she's sort of shy, you know, since she just moved here."

"So you like her then?" Carly asked.

"I don't know," Freddie admitted. "I mean, I asked her out a little spur of the moment-"

"Ya' think?" Carly laughed.

"But she's great," Freddie continued. "I haven't felt like this since…since I've dated Sam."

"Wait, do you mean you want to ask this girl to like, be your _girlfriend_?" Carly asked, a little surprised.

"Kind of," Freddie smiled. "What do you think? Is it too soon?"

"Well, I mean…you just started talking to her," Carly reasoned. "But…if you _do _really like her…"

Freddie sighed. "It's a lot to think about I guess. Hey, is-is Sam here?"

"Um, no, she went back to her place after school," Carly said.

"Did, um, Gibby tell her about this too?" Freddie asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

"Yeah, she was there," Carly said.

"And, um," Freddie went on, playing with the sleeve of his shirt. "Was-Was she, you know, cool about it?"  
"She was surprised," Carly shrugged. "I was too, though. I mean, we barely know this girl and we hear she's dating out best friend? Shocking news, Freddie."

"Yeah, I get that," Freddie said quickly. "But did she seem at all…jealous?"

Carly could've sworn that his voice sounded the tiniest bit hopeful. "She honestly didn't say too much about it," Carly told him. "I mean, I obviously asked her if she was okay, since you guys _did _date and she's my best friend, but she said she was fine."

"Oh," Freddie said. He looked down at the floor. "Well that's good then. That means she's definitely…moved on. Hey, I'd better get going; my mom's gonna want to steam my clothes for ticks. I'll see you at school tomorrow."

"Bye," Carly said. Freddie hurried out of Carly's apartment and she went back to her homework, only to be interrupted again by the door opening one more.

"Hey, Sam," Carly said as her best friend entered. "What's up?"

"Got bored at my place," Sam mumbled, heading to the fridge.

"Freddie just came by, by the way," Carly said, getting up and going into the kitchen too.

"Yeah? What did the stubrag want?" Sam asked harshly, grabbing a pudding cup and yanking the seal open.

"He just told me how his little date with Jennifer went," Carly said.

Sam rolled her eyes.

"Sam?" Carly asked gently. "I know you already told me you were fine, but are you sure this isn't bothering you? It's totally okay if it is. I mean, you see your ex-boyfriend with a new girl and all of the sudden some old feelings come up and-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, old feelings?" Sam frowned. "Carls, Freddie and I have been broken up for like, six months. I _don't_ still have _any _feelings for him."

"Okay," Carly said. "But if you need to talk-"

"I don't," Sam said firmly. "I _don't_."

….

As the week went on, Freddie and Jennifer officially became a couple. Carly still didn't really know Jennifer too well; she didn't have any classes with her and she didn't have the same lunch period as the three teens, so Carly's interactions with the girl were limited to when she would happen to catch her coming out of Freddie's apartment.

"So me and Jennifer went bowling last night," Freddie told Carly one afternoon as they took their seats at their usual table in the Ridgeway cafeteria. "It was pretty…nice."

"Just nice?" Carly said.

"Yeah, you know, she bowled, I bowled, we got some cheese fries after," Freddie shrugged. "It was actually sort of weird only having to buy one order of those…when Sam and I used to go bowling together, we could _never_ get by on just one. And then," he began to chuckle. "We would go to the arcade right next to the shoe counter and Sam and I would spend _hours _playing air hockey. I actually managed to win a few games.  
"Aw," Carly smiled. "So did you and Jennifer play air hockey?"

"Um, no, Jennifer said she didn't really like those sorts of games," Freddie said. "She doesn't like anything competitive at all, really. When we were bowling she didn't even want to keep score."

"Oh, that's…interesting," Carly said. "Hey, where's Sam? She never misses lunch?"

"She probably had to stay after her last class for doing _something _Sammish," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Hey, you know what Jennifer told me when we were bowling. She's _never _had detention? I mean, even I've had detention!"

"Yeah, for chewing gum, Mr. Rebel," Carly chuckled. "Anyway, I think it's kind of weird that I haven't even had a real conversation with this girl. You should bring her over some night or something. I want to get to know her better."

"Actually, I was just about to talk to you about that," Freddie said. "I was thinking I could invite Jennifer up to watch us do iCarly tonight?"

"Oh," Carly said. "Um, yeah, that'd be great."

"Awesome, I'll text Jennifer and tell her," Freddie said.

….

"So what am I supposed to do again?" Gibby asked.

"Ugh," Carly said. "I've told you ten times already, Gibby! You're going to come out on your cue in the gorilla costume and try and wrestle Sam for the bunch of bananas that will be on that table over there."

"And you're _sure_ Sam's not going to really beat me up?" Gibby asked.

"Well I told her not to," Carly said. "That's the best I can do." She looked at her Pear phone. "I wonder where Freddie and Jennifer are? Freddie needs to start setting up all the cameras."

Just then Sam burst into the room, carrying her laptop.

"Hey," Carly said. "You should probably go and get into your costume for-"

"Is Freddie here?" she asked quickly.

"Um, no, not yet?" Carly frowned. "Why? What's up?"

"Well during lunch today, I was doing some research," Sam said.

"_That's _what you were doing?" Carly said. "Wait, is that why you missed Spanish and trig too?"

"Um, yeah," Sam said. "But this was way more important!"

"Well what is it?" Carly asked.

"I just thought it was weird that neither of us knew too much about this Jennifer chick," Sam said. "So I did some digging."

"But didn't you get my text?" Carly said. "Jennifer's coming here to watch the show with Freddie. We can get to know her afterwards, you know, maybe go grab some smoothies and-"

"Oh, you're not gonna want to be getting smoothies with her," Sam said, opening up her laptop. "Not after I show you what I found out about her."

"Huh?" Carly said, confused.

"I went on her Splashface page and found some people from her old school," Sam explained. "And I messaged them-"

"You messaged complete strangers asking about their friend?" Carly exclaimed. "Sam!"

"Oh calm down, they freaked out when they saw I was from iCarly," Sam said. "Anyway, I told them Jennifer had just moved here and I asked her what she was like. And you'll never _believe _what they told me."

"What? Is she from Canada?" Gibby asked.

"What? No!" Sam snapped. "Go stand in the corner, Gibby!"

"What'd you find out?" Carly questioned.

"Apparently Ms. Jennifer's got herself a bit of a reputation," Sam said. "You know how many guys she went out with at her old school just last year? _Nineteen_."

"Whoa," Carly said, raising her eyebrow. "Okay, that's a lot. But that doesn't mean-"

"From what the people from her Splashface page told me," Sam cut her off. "Jennifer goes out with a guy for like, two or three weeks, makes them buy her all sorts of things, take her to fancy places, and then totally dumps them! She _uses _guys, Carly. She's _using _Freddie."

"But…that-that's crazy," Carly said. "Freddie told me that when they go out, she doesn't even eat that much food; he only buys like, one serving of something and they share."

"Yeah, she doesn't make him buy her food, maybe," Gibby said, turning around from the corner he was standing at. "But he's still been going crazy spending money on her."  
"Wait, what?" Carly frowned. "What're you talking about?"

"He told me last night he bought her this fancy bracelet when they went to the mall because she kept saying how much she loved it," Gibby said. "And paid for some shopping spree at Glitter Gloss because she gave him some little puppy dog face. Oh, and he said I'm not supposed to mention it to you guys because you'll probably get the wrong idea about the whole thing and-oh."

"You see?" Sam said triumphantly. "She's using Freddie! She's gonna date him for a few weeks and wipe him clean, because that nub doesn't know how to say no; he's too nice!"

"Okay, well you have to tell Freddie this then," Carly said in a serious tone. "He can't keep spending all this money on this chick!"

"_You _have to tell him," Sam said.

"What? But you're the one-"

"Look, if I tell him, he'll…he'll think I'm just jealous, okay?" Sam said. "That I'm making everything up just to get him to break up with her because I still have feelings for him, which I _don't_."

"But if he told Gibby not to tell me in the first place, he won't listen to me either!" Carly said.

Sam frowned. "Oh…right. Ugh! This stupid witch just _had _to come and woo in Freddie!"

"Witch?" Carly asked, grinning.

"Well I can't call her what I _want_ to call her because _you'd _wash my mouth out with soap again," Sam said. "So I switched a certain letter around. Now what are we gonna do?"

"Maybe we can-"

"Hey, hey," Freddie said brightly, walking into the studio with Jennifer. She was tall and long, perfectly styled brown hair. "Whose ready to do a little iCarly?"

"Um," Carly said, giving Sam a look that clearly meant they would discuss this later. "We-We are."

"Jennifer, you know Carly and Sam, right?" Freddie asked. "I don't think I ever formally introduced you to them."

"No," Jennifer said in a high-pitched voice that made Sam want to hurl. She held out a hand to Sam. "It's _so _nice to meet both of you."

Sam bit her tongue as she shook her hand.

"Oh, and that's Gibby, you know, from history class," Freddie said as he picked up his camera.

"Of course," Jennifer said. "Wow, is that a Timex watch your wearing? I hear those are really expensive."

"Huh? Oh yeah, they are," Gibby said. "It was a gift from my mom."

"I'm sure your girlfriend must _love _it," Jennifer said, smiling widely.

"Um, I don't have a girlfriend," Gibby replied.

"Oh…interesting."

"So are we ready to start this show or what?" Carly said loudly.

"Yeah, just let me get one last thing ready," Freddie said, typing into his computer. "Oh, and by the way, Jennifer and I can't hang out after the show. We're gonna go out and get some dinner. We're thinking of making Friday nights out official date night."

"Well yay for that," Sam mumbled.

"Don't worry about it," Carly said, shooting Sam a look. "We can hang out together some other time."

"And baby?" Jennifer asked, turning to Freddie. "How about instead of getting pizza tonight, you take me to that French place by the beach?"

"Um, well, I-" Freddie started.

Sam and Carly exchanged looks. Everyone knew that restaurant was the most expensive place to eat in all of Seattle.

"Please baby?" Jennifer pouted, rubbing his shoulder. "I've never had French food before."

"Er…sure," Freddie said. "Why not?"

…..

As Carly and Sam did iCarly, both girls kept glancing over at Jennifer, who was sitting directly behind Freddie. For most of the show, she was boredly looking down at her phone, except when Freddie would turn and look at her; then she would grin and laugh as though she was watching her favorite movie.

"…And, we're clear," Freddie finally said. "Great show, you guys."

"Thanks," Sam mumbled.

"So are we ready to go, Freddie?" Jennifer asked sweetly.

"Um, yeah, just let me run back down to my apartment and get some more cash…I've only got twenty dollars on me right now," Freddie told her. "Hey, why don't you stay up here with Carly and Sam and hang out with them for a few minutes?"

"Oh…okay," Jennifer said, though she looked less than pleased at this suggestion.

Freddie left the studio, and Jennifer slowly turned to Carly and Sam.

"So…" she said awkwardly. "Um, how-how long have you guys known Freddie?"

"Seven years," Carly replied. "We're all best friends. Which means we care about him…a lot."

"Oh, that's…sweet," Jennifer said.

"Yeah," Sam said, stepping a bit closer to Jennifer. "Freddie's a great guy."

"I know, he's awesome," Jennifer said. "Hey, I've heard around school that _you _used to date him."

"Yup," Sam said, crossing her arms. "I did. So I know just how much of an _awesome _boyfriend Freddie is."

"Um, Sam?" Carly whispered, but Sam ignored her.

"And like Carly said," Sam continued warningly. "We care about Freddie. So-So you _better_ treat him good, and _never_ hurt him. Or you get to deal with _me_. And you can ask anyone, you _don't _want that."

Jennifer opened her mouth to respond, but just then Freddie walked in.

"Hey, you ready to go?" he asked Jennifer.

"Yeah," Jennifer replied, quickly turning away from Sam and grabbing her purse.

"I'll see you late," Freddie said to Carly and Sam.

"Yeah…later," Carly nodded.

Once the couple had left, she turned to Sam. "What was that all about?"

"What do you mean?" Sam asked.

"I mean I thought we were going to talk to _Freddie_ and get him to stop dating Jennifer," Carly said. "Not Jennifer herself. That's not gonna make them break up."

"I know," Sam sighed. "But…I was just thinking, you know, while we were doing the show…and yeah, Jennifer's a complete skunkbag, but…I dunno. There's always that little chance that we're wrong about her."

"But you just told me what all the kids at her old school told you about her!" Carly said. "_And_ Gibby told us Freddie's been blowing all his cash on her!"

"I know!" Sam said. "But then I saw them together…he just looked so happy." She looked down at the ground, trying to hide her sad face. "Maybe Jennifer will change for him, I dunno," Sam said. "So that's why I only warned her."

"Wow," Carly said softly. "Sam…that's really big of you."

"Yeah," Sam mumbled. "Then why do I feel so lousy?"

"Come here," Carly said, pulling her into a hug. The two were silent for a moment.

"You know," Carly spoke up. "He didn't look _that_ happy with her…he was always _way _more happy when he was with you when you were dating. Even with all the fighting and everything that went on."

"You have to say that," Sam said, smiling a little bit. "You're my best friend."

"Yeah, but it's also true," Carly said. "And hey, since Freddie ditched us tonight, why don't you and I make this a girls night? Wanna order Chinese food and make fun of Jennifer behind her back?"

"Um, yes!" Sam nodded.

…..

The next afternoon, Sam was sitting on Carly's couch, watching an MMA fight while Carly sat at the counter, painting her nails.

"Okay, Sam!" Freddie said suddenly, storming into the apartment. "I can't believe you did that!"

"Did _what_?" Sam snapped.

"Yeah, what'd she do?" Carly asked.

"She _threatened_ my girlfriend!" Freddie exclaimed, glaring at Sam.

"What? I did not!" Sam said.

"Oh really?" Freddie scoffed. "So you telling her to move back to Utah or you're going to beat her unconscious and then shave her head isn't a _threat_ to you?"

"I didn't say _any _of that!" Sam said, standing up. "She made all of that up!"

"Yeah, Freddie, I was there when Sam talked to Jennifer," Carly said. "And all she did was-"

"So you were there when she was doing this and you didn't stop her?" Freddie frowned at Carly.

"She wasn't-"

"I'm surprised," Freddie said, crossing his arms. "I'd expect _Sam _to be mean and rude to someone, but you usually step in."

"I wasn't mean or rude to her!" Sam said. "She's probably just mad that-"

"Freddie, she's using you!" Carly blurted out.

"Carly!" Sam hissed.

"What?" Freddie frowned.

"We found out that at her old school she would date a lot of guys and just use them for a couple of weeks to get them to buy her a lot of stuff," Carly sighed. "And…And Gibby sort of let it slip that you've been spending a lot on her, and-"

"Jennifer is _not _using me," Freddie said firmly.

"Dude-" Sam started.

"No!" Freddie said. "Jennifer's sweet, and kind, pretty much the complete opposite of _you_."

"Freddie-" Carly said softly.

"You know, Sam," Freddie said. "I thought you and I were actually managing to stay friends after we broke up. But I guess I was wrong."

And with that he left the apartment, slamming the door behind him.

"Sam," Carly said gently. "He-He was just angry. He didn't mean any-"

But Sam grabbed her bag and ran out of the apartment before Carly could even comfort her.

…

On Monday morning, Carly was standing at her locker, putting her books away, when Freddie came around the corner.

"Um…hey," he said lamely.

"Hi," Carly said coldly, turning back to her locker.

"Okay, I guess I deserve that," Freddie sighed.

"Clearly!"

"Look, I just wanted to apologize to you for how I acted the other day," Freddie sighed. "I was sort of a…"

"Jerk?" Carly finished.

"Yeah," Freddie said, smiling a bit. "A big one. I shouldn't have flipped out on you like that."

"No chiz," Carly said.

"It's just…I dunno. Maybe I wanted my relationship with Jennifer to work out so badly that I started putting her before you guys; the people who _really _care about me," Freddie said. "I thought maybe if I could have a new girlfriend, I'd stop feeling so…well, the point is, I screwed up."

"Aw, you didn't screw up," Carly told him.

"Yes I did."

"Okay, yeah, you did," Carly nodded.

Freddie chuckled. "Anyway, you'll be glad to know Jennifer and I broke up last night."

"What?" Carly frowned.

"Yeah, you were right; she was using me," Freddie sighed. He shook his head. "Whatever, I'm not exactly torn up about it if you know what I mean."

"Well, I'm glad you came to your senses on her," Carly told him. "You don't need some girl like that."

"Thanks," Freddie said. "So, um…where's Sam? Is she here yet?"

"No," Carly sighed. "She's not coming today; she texted me this morning."

"Oh," Freddie said. "Is she still mad at me then?"

"What do you think?" Carly said, raising an eyebrow. "If you think you acted like a jerk to me, you acted like a humungo jerk-faced jerky jerk to her."

"Well where is she?" Freddie asked.

"My place," Carly said. "She spent the night there; she claimed she had a bad headache this morning, so I didn't force her to come to school, and-hey! Where're you going?" But Freddie was already out the school doors.

….

Sam was laying on the Shay's couch, eating popcorn as she watched some Spanish soap opera. She had the apartment to herself; Spencer had gone to Canada with Socko for the day, and she was happy for privacy. Therefore she was very surprised when she heard a knock at the door. Figuring that Spencer had come back because he had forgotten his keys or something, she simply yelled, "It's open!". When she saw Freddie walk in, though, she narrowed her eyes. "Shouldn't you be at school?"

"I wanted to come talk to you," Freddie said softly, shutting the door behind him.

"Whatever," Sam said, starting to get to her feet so she could go upstairs away from him; he was the _last_ person she wanted to be around at the moment. But Freddie grabbed her hand.

"Please?" he asked.

Sam groaned. "What?" she snapped. "What do you want?"

"Sam," Freddie sighed. "If I were you right now, I'd probably want to punch my face in-"

"You have about ten seconds until I do," Sam mumbled.

"Then I'll talk fast," Freddie said. "Sam, I-I know I owe you a lot more than an apology after…after the other day. But I still want to tell you how sorry I am about how I reacted…I said a lot of things I didn't mean."

Sam rolled her eyes. "Okay, fine. Whatever. But you'd better get back to school; I'm guessing your little girlfriend wouldn't be too chipper about you being here."

"Jennifer's not my girlfriend anymore," Freddie said.

Sam looked up at him. "She's not?"

"Nope," Freddie replied. "I…I realized that you guys were right about her. She kept wanting me to buy her all these things and take her to all these places…So I asked her if she actually _really_ liked me, and she told me I was being crazy, and that of _course_ she liked me. But then she asked me to take her to this boat show this weekend and I told her I couldn't afford it, and then she dumped me. And from what I saw this morning, she's chasing after Kenny Tanker now."

Sam chuckled. "Good. I hate that kid; he bought the last Fat Cake from the vending machine last week."

"And I know she lied to me about you too," Freddie continued. "You know, about you threatening her…"

"Oh," Sam muttered.

"Sam, I don't know what I could ever do to get you to forgive me for what I said to you," Freddie said. "But…can I at least try?"

"Huh, that will be sort of hard to do since we're apparently not friends anymore," Sam said.

"Oh," Freddie said, looking down at the ground. "I can't blame you, I guess."

Sam looked at him. "Hey, come on. I was just kidding."  
Freddie jerked his head up. "Wait…so we're cool?"

"You done being a total nub?"

Freddie grinned. "I think so."

"Then we're cool," Sam said. "Or…_I'm _cool and _you're_ a total dork, rather."

Freddie laughed. "Hey, why don't we get some smoothies before we head back to school? My treat?"

"Dude, you're probably in some major debt from Jennifer," Sam told him. "You need to give your wallet a break…at least for a little bit. Besides, _I'm_ called off of school today. There's no way I'm gonna go in just for the heck of it."

"Alright," Freddie said, getting to his feet. "But after school, wanna plan another Wake Up Spencer bit for tonight?"

"We could do that," Sam said thoughtfully. "Or…you ever skip a day of school, Benson?"

"Once," Freddie said. "To stand in line to get tickets for this Tech Expo I wanted to go to."

"Oy," Sam said, shaking her head. "You can't even skip school right!"

"Want to show me how, Puckett?" Freddie asked, cocking his head.

"Fine, but it's a lot of work," Sam said, moving over to make room for him on the couch. "First, grab that bag of chips right there and get at least halfway done with it before the blonde chick on the this show pushed her sister's ex-boyfriend's laberdoodle down the stairs."


	282. Chapter 282

_Stocking_

"What do you think?" Carly asked, holding her freshly painted fingernails out in front of Sam, who was lounging on Carly's bed, flipping through a magazine.

"What do I think about what?" Sam asked, looking up.

"Which shade of nail polish do you like best?" Carly said.

"Um, Carls, have your eyes gone wonko?" Sam frowned. "All your nails look the same."

"No they don't!" Carly said. "The left hand is painted with sky blue nail polish and the right hand is painted with _baby_ blue nail polish."

"So…they're both _blue_," Sam said.

"Ugh, you have no appreciation for the art of fingernail painting," Carly said, rolling her eyes at her best friend.

"Hey," Freddie said brightly, walking into Carly's room.

"Hey, Freddie? Which nail polish color do you like best?" Carly asked, showing him her hands.

"Uh…the blue one?" Freddie frowned.

"Unbelievable," Carly said, shaking her head.

"Anyway," Freddie said, sitting down next to his girlfriend on the bed. "I finished making the updates to our website. I made new drop down menus, fixed some glitches on the photos page, and even managed to get some of our games to stop dragging!"

He pulled his laptop out of his bag and pulled up . "You see?"

"It doesn't look any different," Sam said.

"Well…appearance wise, no, I guess not," Freddie admitted. "But trust me; it's better now."

"Whatever," Sam shrugged.

"It looks nice, Freddie," Carly told him. "Thanks for doing it."

"No problem," Freddie replied. "I spent all last night doing it."

"You spent your night doing _that_?" Sam laughed. "Man, what's the point of you having a girlfriend if you're gonna go and still spend your nights with your computer."

"I _asked_ you if you wanted to go to the movies!" Freddie reminded her. "And you said you didn't feel like getting out of your pajamas."

"Oh, yeah," Sam said.

"But," Freddie said. "I thought we could do something fun tonight...I got tickets to this really cool classical film festival at the park. We could go to that together."

"Um, a classical film festival?" Sam scoffed. "Have you _not_ met me?"

"You don't want to go?" Freddie asked, his face falling.

"Not really."

"Oh, well…okay," Freddie said. "I guess I can drag Gibby to it."

"There you go," Sam said, opening her magazine again. "Win-win. You get to go to your lame festival and I can stay here and eat all those muffins Spencer's downstairs making with his bake club."

Freddie chuckled. "Well have fun then. I'm gonna go call Gibby and see if he's free tonight. Later!"

"Bye," Carly said as he gave Sam a quick kiss before leaving the room.

"Hey, do you care if I if I rent movie on your Getflix account?" Sam asked, tossing her magazine aside.

"You don't want to finish this magazine before I take it down to recycling?" Carly asked, picking up the magazine and sitting down next to Sam.

"Nah, I read the whole thing except for those lame quizzes in the back," Sam said.

"You don't like those?" Carly frowned.

"No," Sam said, shaking her head. "They're so lame."

"Hey, this one seems kind of fun," Carly said, going through the magazine. "It tells you if your relationship is Rock Solid or an Unstable Mess."

"Why would I want to take that?" Sam chuckled. "My relationship's fine; I don't need some magazine to tell me that."

"Um…okay, sure," Carly said slowly.

Sam sat up. "What?"

"Nothing," Carly said quickly. "So you said you wanted to watch a movie?"

"No, no, no, what did you mean by 'okay, sure'," Sam asked.

"I didn't mean anything," Carly said, avoiding Sam's eyes.

"Carly…"

"Alright, look," Carly sighed. "I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but lately it seems like…I dunno, that you've been a little…un-girlfriendy to Freddie."

Sam frowned. "Ungirlfriendy?"

"I mean, I know that you've never been the 'traditional' girlfriend," Carly said. "And that's fine; there's nothing wrong with that. Freddie obviously likes that you're not some overly-girly chick who hangs all over him. But still…don't you think lately you've been sort of…_mean _to him?"

"Mean?" Sam repeated.

"Again, don't take this the wrong way," Carly said. "But like today, Freddie was really proud of the changes he made to the website, and you totally put it down. And then he wanted you guys to go to a nice film festival and you refused. It just sort of looks like you don't really…_care_ about Freddie anymore."

Sam was silent.

"Oh, now you're mad at me," Carly moaned. "Sam, I'm sorry. Look, you're relationship with Freddie's none of my business, and-"

"Does it really look like that?" Sam asked softly.

"Huh?"

"It really looks like I don't care about him?" Sam said again.

"Well…it's just…Freddie does everything for you, and I know he doesn't mind, but sometimes it just looks like you're kind of unresponsive to everything he does," Carly explained.

Sam looked down at her lap.

"I mean," Carly said quietly. "You-You _do _care about Freddie, right?"

Sam took a deep breath. "Yeah…I do. I-I _love _him. He's like, the _perfect_ boyfriend, and whenever we're alone together he always makes me feel special. He's like…the best thing that ever happened to me, and-and I really don't know what I would do without him."

"Aw, Sam," Carly smiled. "That's so sweet."

Sam shrugged. "Yeah, well, it doesn't matter…if Freddie thinks I don't care about him-"

"Well then why don't you go and tell him exactly what you just told me?" Carly said.

Sam gave her a strange look. "Do you think _I'm_ the romantic one in this relationship?"

"Okay, then maybe you could try _showing _him how much you care about him," Carly suggested.

"Maybe…" Sam said thoughtfully. "I guess I could do that…"

…..

"So see, then my mom pulled out this really cool box from my stocking," Gibby said to Freddie as the two boys sat in Freddie's apartment, about to get ready to go to the classical film festival. "And inside was my first ever container of liquid soap…it was a good Christmas."

"Um, why are you telling me this?" Freddie asked.

"Oh, sorry, didn't know I wasn't allowed to make civilized conversation," Gibby snapped.

Just then Sam walked into the apartment.

"Sam?" Freddie said. "What are you doing here? I thought you were gonna stuff yourself with all of Spencer's muffins."

"I ate twelve, and then Spencer mentioned he lost his Band-Aid when he was baking," Sam cringed. "Anyway, Gibby, get out."

"What? Why?" Gibby exclaimed. "Freddie's about to take me to the film festival!"

"No he's not, I'm gonna go with him," Sam said.

"Really?" Freddie said, smiling.

"Yeah, you know…nothing else to do," Sam shrugged. "So let's go."

"You're going to take your _girlfriend _out instead of _me_?" Gibby said indignantly to Freddie.

"Um, yes?" Freddie said.

"Fine," Gibby said. "I'll just go spend the night with my mom giving my grandpa a sponge bath."

"Gross," Sam said.

"Hey, let me just go grab my jacket," Freddie said as Gibby left.

"Okay," Sam nodded. "Oh, and um...before you do…" she walked over to him and gave him a long, passionate kiss.

"Wow," Freddie said, breathless, once they pulled away. "What was _that _for?"

"Just…because," Sam mumbled. She looked up at her boyfriend. "Um, listen…you-you know I love you, right?"

"Of course," Freddie nodded. "I love you too."

"And even though I don't always, you know, show it, that I really do care about you…a lot?" Sam said.

"I know," Freddie assured her. "Where's this coming from?"

Sam gave him a smile. "Nowhere. Now hurry up, will you? I heard there's gonna be hot chocolate at this thing and mama _loves_ her hot chocolate."


	283. Chapter 283

_Expert_

"What's this?" Spencer asked, coming out of his bedroom to spot Carly lying in front of the T.V., flipping through channels. "Carly Shay spending her Saturday night _alone_?"

"Must you mock me?" Carly snapped.

"Okay, sorry," Spencer said. "But I thought you'd be hanging out with Sam and Freddie like you always do."

"Nah, they went on a date," Carly sighed.

"I thought they usually went out on _Friday _nights, after iCarly," Spencer said.

"Freddie's mom took him to get his ears cleaned out at this special doctors yesterday," Carly explained. "So they rescheduled." She looked at her phone. "It's almost midnight, though, so they should be back soon, and then Sam's gonna spend the night here."

Right on cue, Sam and Freddie walked in.

"Hey," Carly smiled at them. "Did you have fun on your date?"

"Yup," Freddie nodded. "We got dinner and then went to a movie."

"Yeah, it was…fun," Sam said.

"Did you see the movie about the talking watering can?" Spencer asked. "Because that looks like the perfect magical journey for people of all ages!"

"No," Freddie said, shaking his head at him.

"Doesn't the watering can wind up in a landfill at the end of that movie?" Carly said.

Spencer gasped. "You ruined it!"

"Anyway," Freddie said as Spencer fell down onto the couch next to Carly. "I should probably get home, otherwise my mom will organize a city-wide search for me again."

"Okay, bye," Carly said.

"Bye, baby," Sam said as Freddie leaned down to kiss her.

"Bye," Freddie grinned. "Love you."

"Love you too."

"Well, I think I'm gonna head to bed," Carly yawned, turning the T.V. off. "I'm pooped. Watching six straight hours of T.V. can really take it out of a girl."

"Um…actually, can I ask for your advice about something first?" Sam asked.

"Sure," Carly nodded. "What's up?"

"Hold on. Spencer! Leave!"

"Hey!" Spencer said indignantly. "This is _my _apartment. I will not be pushed out like-"

"We're gonna talk about girl stuff," Sam said.

"Well later then," Spencer said, hurrying to his feet and into his room.

"Ohh, girl stuff?" Carly said. "You want to _willingly _talk about girl stuff? This must be important."

"It is…sort of," Sam said.

"Okay then spill!" Carly told her.

"Alright…so you know how you're sort of a…relationship expert?" Sam asked.

"Sam, I just spent my Saturday night watching reruns of _The Terrible Homemakers of Tennessee_," Carly said. "I don't think I'm exactly an expert."

"Well, you're still good at all that flirting chiz, right?"

"Well I _do _know how to turn my flirt on," Carly laughed. "But what's that got to do with anything?"

"I…I was sort of hoping you could…help me in that department," Sam said awkwardly.

"What? Why?" Carly frowned. "You _have_ a boyfriend already. Remember, _Freddie_?"

"I know," Sam moaned, leaning back on the couch. "But it just seems like lately, Freddie and I have been in a-a rut."

"A rut?" Carly repeated.

"Yeah, you know, kind of stuck," Sam said. "It's just like out relationship has become sort of…blah. I mean every week we get dinner and go see a movie, the nights his mom works late we'll sometimes, you know, make out, but…it's getting a little predictable."

"Gotcha," Carly nodded. "But I still don't know what you want my advice with?"

"Come on, just give me some of your Carly secrets," Sam said. "Tell me how to kind of….spice things up with Freddie."

"Oh," Carly said, somewhat surprised. "You mean like, make things a little less…blah?"

"Exactly," Sam said.

"Um, well," Carly said thoughtfully. "Maybe…maybe you can sort of surprise him one day. Next week when he comes to pick you up for your date night, be waiting for him with a romantic candle light dinner, and you can have some music playing in the background, oh, and make sure you wear something hot-"

"Wait, wait, wait," Sam said. "That's cool and all, Carls, but…that sort of brings up back to where we started. Fancy dinner. I love food and all, but still…"

"Well," Carly said slowly. "How about after your food, you…come here." She leaned down and whispered something in Sam's ear.

Sam's eyes widened.

"Carly Shay!" Sam laughed. "I am _shocked_. What would Spencer say if he just heard that?"

"Which is why I whispered!" Carly hissed. "Now shh! Before he _does _here you!"

"You really think that would work?" Sam asked skeptically.

"I've never done it myself," Carly admitted. "But you know I've seen more than my fair share of romantic movies; it always seems to work for those couples."

"Interesting," Sam said thoughtfully.

"So you gonna give it a try?" Carly asked.

"I dunno," Sam said. "I'll think about it."

….

The next Friday night, Carly was hanging out with Gibby, watching a horror movie that Spencer had borrowed from Socko.

"I don't get this movie," Gibby commented as Carly flinched at a particularly scary scene.

"What the heck's not to get?" she exclaimed. "The clown's going around possessing all the dolls in the city to attack the poodles!"

"But why don't the poodles just call the cops?" Gibby asked.  
"What poodle knows how to use an phone?" Carly frowned.

"That's the first thing I taught my poodle to do," Gibby said.

"You had a poodle?"

"Yeah," Gibby nodded. "But then poor Noodles got involved with some telemarketers and ran away and never came back."

Carly gave him a strange look just as Sam burst into the room.

"Hey Sam," Carly said. "Wanna watch-"

"Gibby leave," Sam interrupted.

"Why?" Gibby demanded. "I want to watch this movie!"

"The clown get's beaten up by some mime," Sam told him.

"Well," Gibby said, standing up. "Thanks for ruining fifty-eight minutes of suspenseful build-up."

"Just get out of here!"

"Fine," Gibby mumbled.

"Why'd you kick Gibby out?" Carly asked as Gibby headed upstairs.

"Dude!" Sam said, throwing her arms around Carly. "Your little tip was _amazing_!"

"What tip?"

"You know, when last week you told me to-"

"Oh, right, right," Carly said. "Wait, so it really worked? I _knew _those chick flicks would come in handy some day!"

"Oh, it worked," Sam grinned. "It worked _good_…"

"Well I'm glad then," Carly chuckled. "So where's Freddie then?"

"Oh, he's still across the hall at his place," Sam said. "And I just sent a fake text to his mom saying that there was a tofu sale at Whole Edibles, so hopefully that will give us some more time…Seriously, Carls, Freddie loved it too. When he-"

"Hey, any other guy, I'd love to hear the details," Carly cut her off. "But I think if I hear about Freddie doing it…ugh. I don't think I could keep my dinner down."

Sam laughed. "Fair enough, kid. Well, I'm gonna go back with Freddie. But I'll come by here later tonight, okay?"

"Okay," Carly nodded. "Have fun with the rest of your date then."

"Oh I will," Sam grinned.


	284. Chapter 284

_Scale_

"Come on, it can't be that bad," Carly said to Sam.

"It is, Carls," Sam groaned over the phone. "I've been sitting here for like, two hours watching a bunch of nerds build toy trains!"

"Hey, one of those nerds is your boyfriend," Carly reminded her. "And it's important that you do this; last time you went to one of Freddie's train club meetings things didn't work out…well. Now that you and him got back together, you need to show Freddie that you're willing to try his activities. I mean he went back to prison with you the other day to apologize to your uncle and cousin about the whole ham situation."

"I know," Sam moaned. "But prison's _fun_. This is boring."

"Suck it up," Carly said. "Otherwise I'm throwing out all this leftover fried chicken from the dinner Spencer ordered us."

"Okay, okay, I'll behave," Sam conceded. "I'll talk to you later."

"Have fun," Carly said.

Sam hung up her phone and walked over to Freddie and the rest of the Training Bros, who were still huddled around their train tracks.

"Are you guys done with this thing yet?" Sam asked.

"Not yet," Freddie told her looking up from the model he was working on. "But I think we're almost there…"

"Building a one-twentieth scale model of the Mundo Express is time consuming work!" snapped one of the other Training Bros. "You can't rush it!"

Sam made a lunge for the boy but Freddie quickly grabbed her hand and held her back, so Sam simply gave him an evil glare.

"Well…what are you doing now?" Sam asked.

"I'm just adding one last coat of paint to the caboose of this thing," Freddie told her. "And then once it dries, we can-Ah! Butter!" He had accidently spilled some red paint on his shirt.

"Oh no, code blue! Code blue!" one of the Training Bros yelled, blowing his whistle.

"It's just paint," Sam frowned.

"You'd better hurry up and get some club soda on that," the boy standing next to Freddie told him. "My mom has some upstairs."

"Yeah, you're right, my mom would _kill _me if I came home with paint on my shirt," Freddie said.

"Prison was _so _much better than this," Sam said under her breath.

"What?"

"Nothing," Sam said quickly. "You need any help, baby?"

"Nah, I'll just scrub it out really quick," Freddie replied. "And then we can all get back to our train; I mean what kind of lame night would it be if we didn't even get to make this baby move?"

"Yeah, _so _lame," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

Freddie headed upstairs to tend to his shirt, leaving his girlfriend alone with the Training Bros.

"Um, why are you all staring at me?" Sam asked, looking around at the many eyes that were on her.

"Not too many girls come down here," one boy replied, taking a puff of his Asthma inhaler.

"No…really?" Sam said, her voice dripping in sarcasm.

"It's true," another boy answered. "Freddie's the first Training Bro to ever have a girlfriend. We gave him a whole page in our bi-weekly newsletter for that accomplishment."

"Hey! I had a girlfriend!" a boy wearing a blue conductor's hat said indignantly.

"It doesn't count if she has more hair on her upper lip than you," the first boy said.

"So none of you guys have ever had a girlfriend?" Sam asked. "What about those geeky girls from the all-girls math team? The Mathdies?"

"No, they won't talk to us," one of the boys sighed. "They've all got boyfriends from the Chess Team."

"Oh…" Sam said. "Well, you know…eventually some girl will be pathetic enough to wanna maybe _not_ call the cops if you talk to her."

"Wow, that was really nice," the boy said. "Maybe you _are_ a cool girl, like Freddie said."

"Yeah…I was starting to think he was crazy, saying how awesome of a girlfriend you were all the time," another boy nodded. "But maybe's he got a point."

"Um, thanks," Sam said. "So…Freddie really told you guys I was an awesome girlfriend?"

"Pfft, that's all we've been hearing for the past _month_," the boy replied. "Sam this, Sam that. Sam, Sam, Sam, all the time."  
"Really?" Sam said, raising an eyebrow. "What does he say?"

"I don't think we should really be talking about this without Freddie here," another boy said.

"Dude…" Sam said warningly, grabbing the kid's collars. "You gonna start this?"

"No, no of course not!" the boy squeaked. "Tell her!"

"He says things like how much he likes your little nicknames for him," one of the boys told her. "And how you have really soft hair, and that he _loves_ being around you…it's nauseating."

"Oh…" Sam said. "He really says all that?"

"Repeatedly," the boy whose collar Sam had grabbed mumbled. "The way he talks it's like he's found himself a perfect Meya."

The Training Bros all scoffed. "Yeah, right."

"What the chiz is a Meya?" Sam demanded.

"It's sort of this system of how us…intellectuals-"

"You mean nerds," Sam cut him off.

"Fine," the boy snapped. "It's a system that us _nerds_ use to describe our ideal lady."

"What?" Sam frowned. "You've got to be kidding me."

"It's actually quite the ideal system," another boy spoke up. "See, in _Galaxy Wars_, Princess Meya, the fair beauty of light and purity, is pretty much every nerd's dream girl. So whenever one of us has a lady friend, we compare her to Princess Meya…but so far only Freddie's had a girlfriend out of us…"

"So you compare chicks to a fictional sci-fi princess?" Sam exclaimed. "And you people _wonder _why you're single?"

"Aw, someone's jealous that they didn't make the Meya rating," one of the boys smirked at her.

"Technically, Freddie never compared her to Meya yet," someone said. "He keeps going on about 'respecting girls'…"

"He just doesn't want to admit that his girlfriend couldn't get the Meya rating," the other boy said, crossing his arms.

"Hey, I could get this stupid Meya rating if I wanted!" Sam snapped, shoving the boy, hard. "I mean…_hypothetically_, what would some chick have to be like to get this lame rating?"

"She'd have to be able to recite the entire Sky Naut congress assembly," one boy said.

"She'd have to be able to tell the difference between a 1931 rivet and a 1932 rivet!"

"She'd need to know how to bake my favorite pie!"

"And know enough about the recent debate between the Pear Company and Macrocrop to carry on a conversation with me!"

"Alright!" Sam said, cutting them all off. "Jeez! You guys _really _can't afford to be that picky here with girls!"

"A women of Princess Meya's standards is hard to find," the Training Bro standing next to her said.

"You guys _do _realize you give pretty much anyone permission to hit you when you say chiz like that, right?" Sam said, rolling her eyes. "But…that's really what nerdy guys like in their girls?"

"Every nerd I've ever met," the boy shrugged.

"Interesting," Sam said thoughtfully. "Alright, you freaks have been somewhat helpful. But now I _really _feel like I need to give one of you a wedgie."

…..

"Good, Sam, you're here," Freddie said the next day as he heard his apartment door open. "I was just about to put on our DVD and-what's that?"

"Blueberry pie," Sam said, handing him a large, homemade pie. "Your favorite, right?"

"Yeah," Freddie grinned. "What's this for though?"

"Oh you know, thought you'd like some desert," Sam shrugged. She plopped herself down on the couch next to him. "Lou Groundrunner, Barford Gleamer, Tank Oakly, Marvel Lightbeam, Corthwalas Biggleton and Vanderbelt Sanders."

"What?" Freddie said, confused.

"That's the entire Sky Naut congress assembly," Sam replied.

"Well, yeah…" Freddie nodded. "But since when do you know anything about-"

"This," Sam said, interrupting him as she pulled out a picture of a rivet from her backpack. "Is a 1931 rivet, and this one," she pulled out another sheet of paper. "Is a 1932 rivet. You can tell the difference because the 1932 rivet is smaller and is a darker shade of gray than the 1931 model."

"That's-That's right," Freddie frowned, still confused. "But why are you-"

"And I feel that the Pear Company raises some interesting points in their argument that Macrocrop computers fail to keep up with the ever changing demands of consumers in terms of their data software updates and download speeds, but the Pear Company also fails to realize that their constant updates are sometimes a big turn-off to customers, which may account for their recent fall in sales this past month."

"Okay, what the heck is going on here?" Freddie asked. "I think I'm lost or something."

"Well then you better stop being lost, because I just got me a perfect Meya rating," Sam said triumphantly, grabbing a can of soda from the coffee table. "Boom, baby!"

"Meya rating?" Freddie repeated.

"Yeah, you know, that secret nerd scale you and your lame friends rate chicks on," Sam nodded. "I did everything they all said a girl would have to be able to do to get a perfect rating."

"Oh, Sam," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Tell me you didn't really think that was serious."

"Your Training Bros all seemed to think it was a big deal," Sam said.

"Yeah, and how many dates have any of those guys had in the past year?" Freddie pointed out. "Look, Sam, I think it's really sweet that you learned all that stuff just to try and be the 'ideal girlfriend' for a nerdy guy, but come on. How stupid is that scale?"

"Um, incredibly stupid," Sam said.

"Exactly," Freddie nodded. "I love you just the way you are, Sam. I don't want some dumb princes Meya girlfriend."

"Really?" Sam said.

"Really," Freddie said as he put his arms around her, bringing her closer to him. "You're perfect."

"And you're getting there…sort of," Sam grinned, kissing him. "But you still need to let all those nuby train guys know that I _got _that Princess Meya rating."

"What? Why?" Freddie frowned.

"Because do you have any idea how long it took me to bake that pie?" Sam said. "Or to memorize all those Sky Naut names? Besides, if my boyfriend's gonna be in some nerdy club, I want it to at _least _go on the record that he _officially_ has the bestpossible girlfriend around."

"Fine," Freddie laughed. "I'll tell them."

"Thank you," Sam said, satisfied. "Now go get some forks for this pie, Benson, before I use my hands and get blueberry all over this plastic cover on your mom's couch."


	285. Chapter 285

_Notebook_

"Ugh! Can you call Sam?" Carly asked Freddie as she paced back and forth in the iCarly studio.

"Why me?" Freddie asked from the beanbag chair he was sitting in.

"Because I'm not dating her!" Carly snapped. "I told her ten times at school today to be up here by four so we can finish going over ideas for iCarly this week, and now it's four thirty, and where is she? Not here!"

"You know Sam, she probably wound up getting detention or something," Freddie said. He pulled out his phone. "Yup, look. I have a text message from Sam right here: 'Got detention for throwing a pinecone at Mr. Howard.'"

"Well how are we supposed to plan iCarly without her?" Carly moaned.

"Hey, look, that's Sam's notebook over there," Freddie said, getting to his feet to retrieve Sam's purple notebook that was sitting on one of the seats in their prop car. "She probably has all her ideas in her; we can just go through it and plan everything from that."

"Okay, fine," Carly nodded. "Man…I need some juice to distress now. Want anything?"

"Nah, I'm good," Freddie told her.

"Alright, well, I'll be back in a sec," Carly said as she headed out of the studio.

Freddie sat back down with Sam's notebook and opened it up to try and find the pages where the iCarly ideas were written.

"Here we go," Freddie said, stopping at a page with a long list on it. "What do we have…Girls: Alexandra, Carmen, Brooke, Leah, Roxanne. Boys: Mathew, Trevor, Cameron, Noah, William…What's this?"

He flipped the page and saw a bunch of doodles of the names _Sam Benson _or _Mrs. Freddie Benson_.

Freddie frowned; this didn't seem like something _Sam Puckett _would write! This was something some love-struck teenage girl would be writing in her notebook, not Sam! He flipped through the pages and saw more lists of boy and girl names, and then saw a printed photo taped to one of the pages. It was of small child with blonde hair and dark brown eyes. The website name at the corner of the page read .

Freddie couldn't believe what he was seeing…was Sam _really _picturing them having kids together?

"Alright, you ready to start planning?" Carly asked, returning to the studio with a cup of juice.

"Um, actually, I need to run somewhere really quick!" Freddie said, sliding the notebook into his backpack and jumping to his feet.

"What? But we need to-"

"Bye Carls!" Freddie said, running out of the studio. He needed to talk to Sam about this…

…..

Freddie sighed, looking down at his watch as he sat, waiting, on Sam's front porch. Sam's detention finished nearly half-an-hour ago. He wondered where she was…

Just then a car pulled into the driveway and Sam hopped out of it with a smoothie.

"See ya, Wendy," Sam called. She turned to walk up to her house. "Freddie?"

"Hey, where were you?" Freddie asked. "I thought detentions usually ended at five."

"Yeah, but Wendy and me decided to grab a smoothie afterwards," Sam replied.

"Oh," Freddie nodded.

"So what's up?" Sam said, giving him a quick kiss as she unlocked her front door. "Was Carly really wazzed off that I missed our little iCarly planning session?"

"Um, well, I actually sort of missed it too," Freddie admitted.

"What? Dude, we can't _both _bail on those things!" Sam said. "She will _murder _us tomorrow. I hope you at least made a good excuse."

"I did…sort of," Freddie lied.

"Okay, well, what do you wanna do then?" Sam asked, tossing her backpack carelessly on the floor by her door.

"Um, well, you left your notebook at Carly's," Freddie said, pulling the notebook out of his backpack and handing it to Sam.

"You seriously waited here just to give me this?" Sam laughed. "You really think I would actually _use _this and-" she paused as she looked down at the purple cover. She slowly looked up at Freddie. "Um…you-you didn't _read _this, did you?"

"Look, I thought it had your iCarly ideas in it-"

"No!" Sam moaned.

"Sam, I don't think it's really anything to get worked up over, but still, maybe you wanna talk-"

"No," Sam said again. "Nope. Leave. Now, Benson."

"Sam, I just-Wait! Where are you going?" Freddie said as Sam rushed upstairs.

"Away from you!"

Freddie groaned. He just _had _to go snooping in her notebook.

"Sam," he said as he ran up the stairs after her, only to be greeted by her locked bedroom door. "Sam, come on, baby, don't be embarrassed-"

"Go. Away."

"I'm not going anywhere until you open the door, Sam," Freddie said firmly.

"Well then have fun siting out there for the next three days!"

"Alright," Freddie said, reaching into his pocket for a bobby pin he just so happened to have. "You wanna play it that way…"

He jiggled the pin around in the lock of the door and in a few seconds the door swung open.

Sam sat up on her bed. "Did you _pick my lock_?"

"I've learned a few things from dating you," Freddie smirked. He sat down next to her. "Look, Sam," he said gently. "I'm…I'm guessing I wasn't supposed to see what was in that notebook-"

"Yeah, no chiz!" Sam mumbled.

"But you don't need to be embarrassed by it," Freddie told her. "I mean, it's not like I'm gonna freak out over it."

"Please, of course you're gonna freak out over it!" Sam said. "What guy _wouldn't _get all freaked out over their girlfriend picturing them getting married and having kids someday? It's like, a guy's worst nightmare!"

Freddie put his arm around her. "Maybe to some guy who isn't really committed to the girl he's dating. But Sam, you know how much I love you. You're not just some high school girlfriend to me. I-I really see us having a future together."

Sam looked up at him. "Really?"

"Really," Freddie nodded. "I just…I just never would've thought _you _would be so…into it."

Sam blushed. "Yeah…I know everyone thinks of me as some crazy, wild chick who never wants to settle down-"

"That's not what I-"

"I know," Sam smiled. "But it's just, you know, a lot of people have told me they really can't see me settling down with some dude and having kids. And I guess I kind of see where they're coming from…but I-I do want that…Not now, obviously, but eventually I think it would be nice to be a wife and mom."

Freddie kissed her. "You'd be an amazing wife. And mom."

Sam didn't reply.

"Hey," Freddie said, blushing himself now. "When-When you picture yourself married and with kids…who's there with you?"

Sam mumbled something under her breath.

"What?"

Sam took a deep breath. "You."

Freddie grinned. "I am?"

"Yeah," Sam whispered. "It's always you."

"You know," Freddie said as Sam rested her head on his shoulder. "When I picture myself getting married-"

"You picture that kind of stuff too?" Sam chuckled.

"Guys are allowed to," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Anyway, when I picture myself married and with kids…I'm always with you too."


	286. Chapter 286

_Bone_

"Hey, Spencer," Carly said as she came downstairs. "Do we have any more of that cereal with the berries and-what are you doing?"

"Oh, you know, just pounding rocks with a hammer," Spencer said as he swung his hammer down on a large rock that was sitting on the living room floor.

"Okay…why?"

"Because I need gravel for this sculpture I'm working on," Spencer replied. "And when I went to the hardware store to buy some, they wanted to charge me twenty bucks a bag! So I went to the park, found some nice rocks, and now I'm making my own gravel!"

"Alrighty then," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Hey, where's Sam?" Spencer asked. "She'd probably be a lot better at pounding a rock with a hammer than me. Did she spend the night here?"

"Nah, she's at her place," Carly told him, pouring herself a bowl of cereal. "I think she's really starting to miss Freddie."

"Oh right, he's still at that nerd camp," Spencer said.

"Yeah, for another week," Carly nodded. "Those two have never been apart for this long, even before they were dating, so I think it's kind of taking a toll on Sam."

"Aw, poor kid," Spencer said, swinging his hammer down on the rock again.

"I know," Carly said. "So I was gonna go over and cheer her up, maybe go to Build-A-Bra together."

"Alright, well, have fun," Spencer said.

"And you have fun with your gravel," Carly grinned as she grabbed her purse.

"I will!"

…..

"Yo, Puckett!" Carly called as she let herself into Sam's house.

"What?" Sam called back from her living room. She was sitting on the couch, her hair up and wearing sweats as she ate a plate of chicken wings.

"What are you doing?" Carly frowned.

"Eating," Sam replied simply as she slurped her chicken wing, leaving a bare bone.

"Yes…I can see that," Carly cringed as Sam wiped her hands on her pants. "Well, come on. We're gonna go to Build-A-Bra. They have new multi-colored hooks."

"Um, no, I think I'm gonna pass on that, Carls," Sam mumbled, taking another chicken wing. "You go ahead."

"No," Carly said. "We're gonna do something together today. I know you're starting to feel all bummed because your boyfriend's away at camp, but that's what you have a best friend for; to cheer you up!"

"I don't really feel like being cheered up, Carls," Sam sighed. She pushed her half-finished plate of chicken wings away. "You can have the rest of these if you want. I'm not really hungry."

"Wow, you must _really _miss Freddie," Carly said.

Sam shrugged.

"Oh, come on, Sam," Carly said, sitting down next to her best friend and giving her a hug. "I know you and Freddie really haven't spent too time apart as a couple, but you can get through this. He'll be back in a week and then you can be all coupley and kissy again. Besides, it's not like you haven't talked to him since he's been at camp; he calls you, right?"

Sam didn't reply.

"Wait…" Carly said slowly. "Freddie _has _called you, hasn't he?"

"No! Okay! He hasn't!" Sam exclaimed. "He hasn't called me _once _since he's been at that stupid camp!"

"Oh, Sam," Carly said. "I'm sure that's only because he's been really busy."

"No, it's not," Sam mumbled, laying back against the arm of the couch.

"Sure it is," Carly assured her. "He's probably just-"

"No, the reason he hasn't called, or texted, or emailed or _anything_," Sam said loudly. "Is because him and I got into a fight before he left for camp!"

Carly blinked. "Oh…You never told me that."

"Yeah, well sorry for not telling you all about my relationship problems," Sam snapped.

"Sam," Carly sighed, ignoring Sam's comment because she knew her friend was in a rough place. "You and Freddie fight all the time. It's never kept him from you before."

"Exactly, which means he must've finally come to his senses and realized what a terrible girlfriend I am," Sam mumbled.

"That's not true," Carly said firmly. "What did you two even fight about anyway?"

"Well, he sort of wanted me to try and 'improve my relationship' with his mother while he was gone," Sam said. "And-And I told him he was crazy if he thought I would spend two minutes alone with that woman, and he said it was really important to him, and-and I said I didn't care. Can you believe that? I actually said I didn't care! That was the last thing I told him before he left for two weeks! That's why he hasn't called me! I didn't tell I love him or to have a good time, no, I refused to do _one _thing for him!" At this point tears were falling from Sam's face, and Carly was staring at her, shocked. She had never seen Sam like this.

"And now he's probably at that lame camp meeting some nerdy girl who his mom would actually _like _and wouldn't be so terrible to him all the time!" Sam continued, still crying. "And you know what? It's all my fault!"

"Sam," Carly said gently, hugging her tightly. "Sam, stop. You're not a terrible girlfriend at all. Freddie loves you, and he still _does _love you. I mean…okay, maybe-maybe you could've been a little more…receptive about spending time with Mrs. Benson like Freddie wanted you to, but Freddie realizes what his mom's like. I'm sure he's cooled off about it by now. And he wouldn't want to date any nerdy girl he might meet at his computer camp because he has you waiting for him right here when he gets back and I'm serious Sam, he _loves _you."

"I dunno, Carly," Sam muttered, wiping her eyes. "I think I really screwed up with Freddie this time."

"Well then it's not too late to fix it," Carly told her.

…

"Aha! Finally!" Spencer said triumphantly the next day. "After 20 hours of pounding rocks I finally have one cup of gravel!"

"I thought your sculpture needed like, ten cups of gravel," Carly frowned.

"It does," Spencer nodded, picking up his hammer again.

"Wouldn't it just be easier to go pay the twenty bucks for the gravel at the store?" Carly asked.

"Never! I will not be a slave to the cooperate world!" Spencer said firmly.

"Well then you're sculpture's not gonna be done for another six months," Carly laughed. She looked at her phone. "Spencer, I'm kind of worried about Sam. I haven't heard from her since I went to her place yesterday."

"Was she really that upset?" Spencer asked.

"Yes!" Carly nodded. "I told you, she thinks Freddie hates her because he hasn't called her or anything since he left for camp. She's really down about it! I've tried calling her and texting her but I can't get ahold of her. Oh man, she's probably still moping on her couch. I'm gonna go over and try to-"

But just then the computer on the kitchen counter began to beep, and a tiny window appeared.

"Hey! That's Freddie!" Carly exclaimed, reading his screen name on the video chat window. She ran over to the computer and clicked the accept button. "Freddie!"

"Hey, Carls," Freddie replied over the monitor.

"What the heck is going on here, Benson?" Carly snapped.

"What do you mean?" Freddie frowned.

"I mean why are you calling _me _when you should be calling your girlfriend, Sam!" Carly said.

"I _did _try and call her, like, ten minutes ago," Freddie defended. "I texted her, left her a message…That's why I called over here, actually. I figured she'd either be here or you'd know where she was."

"Well she's not here and I don't know where she is," Carly sighed. "She's kind of…upset. Why didn't you call her sooner? It's been a week!"

"I know," Freddie nodded. "The thing is, though, that here, since it's, you know, a tech based camp, they thought it would be cool to have us campers build and create a wireless network and we just got it up; so basically I haven't been able to get in contact with anyone until about half-an-hour ago."

"That's a little…crazy," Carly frowned.

"Yeah, but it was actually sort of fun to build," Freddie said. "Now what did you say about Sam? She's upset? What's wrong?"

"She thought you were mad at her because you never called!" Carly told him. "She thought it was because of some fight you two had before you left!"

"Fight?" Freddie said, confused. "What fight are you-Oh, wait. You mean about her spending time with my mom?"

"Yes!"

"I'm not mad at her over that," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Well you better keep trying to get in contact with her then," Carly said. "Because she really-"

Just then the front door opened and Sam dragged her feet in. "Man!" she said, exhausted. "That was the worst five hours of my life!"

"What did you do?" Spencer asked.

"I spent the morning with Mrs. Benson," Sam replied. "It was totally-Wait. Freddie?"

"Hey, Sam," Freddie smiled from.

"Sam, Freddie hasn't been able to contact anyone because him and his nerd campers had to actually _build _a wireless network!" Carly grinned. "He's not mad at you."

"What?" Sam exclaimed, storming towards the monitor.

"Wait, you said spent the morning with my mom?" Freddie said.

"Yes!" Sam snapped. "I woke up at eight o'clock so her and I could go get breakfast at some tofu place, and then I spent forever with her in this store that sells drapes!"

"Whoa, you actually spent time with her?" Freddie exclaimed.

"I thought you really wanted me to!" Sam said.

"Well, yeah, but I never really thought you'd _do _it!" Freddie said. "It was just one of those things you say to someone that you want to happen but know never will. Like when Carly tells Spencer she wants him to start going to the gym."

"Hey!" Spencer said indignantly.

"Hold up, so I just threw away my entire morning for _nothing_?" Sam said loudly.

"Not for nothing," Freddie said quickly. "It really _does_ mean a lot that you did that for me, Sam. Hey, so does my mom love you now?"

"Nah, I'm pretty sure she still hates me," Sam shrugged.

"Oh…well, at least you tried," Freddie sighed.

"Come on, Spence, let's give these two some private time," Carly smiled.

"But my gravel!" Spencer cried as Carly dragged him out of the apartment.

"You really thought I was mad at you?" Freddie asked as the two left.

"Well…sort of," Sam admitted. "I mean, how was I supposed to know you weren't calling me because you actually _couldn't _call. I thought you were peeved off at me for being a lousy girlfriend."

"Sam, you may be loud, pushy, and obnoxious at times, but you are definitely _not _a lousy girlfriend," Freddie said. "I mean, you just spent _five hours _with my mother. For me! I don't know _any _girl who would actually do that."

Sam smiled. "It was a pretty suckish morning…"

"I bet," Freddie laughed. "And I'm sorry you thought I was mad at you…You know I love you, though, right?"

"You better, after all those tofu sausage patties I had to eat with your mom," Sam mumbled.

"Those really don't taste half bad once you get used to them," Freddie told her.

"Yeah I doubt that," Sam scoffed.

"Well when I get back next week, I promise I'll take you out for some _real _breakfast," Freddie told her.

"Good, I look forward to it, Benson," Sam said.

"Hey, I need to go now," Freddie said. "A lecturer from the Pear Company's here to give this really cool presentation."

"Oh, wouldn't want to miss that," Sam teased, rolling her eyes.

"Ha, ha," Freddie said dryly. "Anyway, I'll call you tomorrow, baby. Love you."

"Love you too," Sam smiled.


	287. Chapter 287

**AN-Hey, really sorry I put the wrong chapter up yesterday! I forgot that I had written another oneshot with the same title a while ago, so when I went to upload it, I accidently uploaded the old one instead.**

…**..**

_Ink _

"And you know how sometimes you may _think _a squirrel is looking at you weird?" Freddie said to Carly as the two climbed downstairs from the iCarly studio. "Well it's actually just them listening intently to your movements."

"Uh-huh," Carly said boredly as she walked over to the fridge and pulled out a pitcher of lemonade.

"You see, they're listening to try and see if it sounds like you're a threat to them and-"

"Hey, Freddie, don't take this the wrong way, but why aren't you going on about squirrels to Sam?" Carly cut him off. "I mean, that's what girlfriends are for; for pretending to care about whatever it is your rambling on about."

"She's out with some friend she met when she was visiting her aunt in jail," Freddie told her. "The kid was apparently visiting their aunt too, and Sam said they had a lot in common, so they went to some motorcycle show together that Sam's been wanting to go to. It worked out perfectly for me since bikes bore me to death."

"Oh, so cool giant bikes bore you but squirrel documentaries don't?" Carly chuckled.

"Hey, I learned a lot from that documentary," Freddie defended. "Like did you know-"

"Ugh, please, if I hear another squirrel fact I'm gonna go find a squirrel and throw it at you," Carly moaned.

"Fine," Freddie shrugged as he sat down at the computer. "But don't come crying to me when-Hey! Guess what?"

"What?" Carly asked, taking a sip of her lemonade.

"I finally got an email back from that tutoring program I applied for," Freddie said. "And I'm in! I'm officially Freddie Benson: Science Tutor."

"Ohh, how official," Carly joked.

"This is great, I could really use the extra cash from this job," Freddie said. "Oh wow, they've already scheduled my first appointment for tomorrow at four."

"Okay, but do you think you'll be done by five?" Carly asked. "Because that's when we need to practice that one bit with the lemon zester and the-"

"Hey, hey, what goes on people?" Sam asked, walking into the apartment, along with a tall, muscular boy with tattoos running up his arms.

"Um, hey," Freddie frowned, staring at Sam's companion. "Who-Who's your friend?"

"Oh this is Brody, my friend I met in jail, remember?" Sam said. "We just got back from the motorcycle show. Brody, this is Carly and Freddie."

"Hey, um, cool tats," Carly said, clearly trying not to sound too girly and weak.

"Thanks, I did half of them myself," Brody replied.

"So, um, did you guys have fun at the motorcycle show then?" Freddie asked, still eyeing Brody uneasily.

"Yeah, it was cool," Sam nodded. "You should've come, baby."

"Well, you know, maybe next time," Freddie said.

"Anyway, we saw this awesome vintage Dynamo Durix bike that was literally the coolest thing I've ever seen," Sam said.

"What? You said my bike was the coolest thing you've ever seen," Brody laughed.

"No, I said it was _pretty _cool," Sam said, tossing Brody a can of soda from the fridge. "Nothing can compare to the Dynamo."

"You-You ride a motorcycle?" Freddie asked.

"Sure do, I've got myself a sweet Flarvy," Brody nodded. "You ride?"

"Um, well, I-I've got a nice set of wheels," Freddie said.

"You mean your _bike_?" Sam frowned.  
"That your mom won't let you take the training wheels off of?" Carly added.

"Shh!" Freddie hissed.

"Um, well, I'd better be going," Brody said, looking at his phone. "I've got a meeting with my parole officer. Nice meeting you guys."

"You too," Carly smiled.

"Yeah, it was a blast," Freddie said dryly.

"Hey, I think I left my t-shirt from the show down on your motorcycle," Sam said. "I'll go down with you a look."

"Alright," Brody nodded as Sam pushed the elevator button.

"Hey, order a pizza, will you Carls?" Sam asked as her and Brody stepped into the elevator. "I'm feeling pepperoni and sausage. The food at the motorcycle show was surprisingly plain."

"But you still owe me seven bucks from the last time," Carly reminded her.

"Um, I'll pay you back when I come back up!" Sam told her as the elevator door slid shut.

"She's not gonna pay me," Carly sighed, picking up her phone to order the pizza.

"Unbelievable!" Freddie exclaimed, slamming his cup of lemonade on the counter angrily.

"Eh, it's only seven bucks," Carly shrugged. "It's not that big a-"

"No, not that!" Freddie said. "I mean Brody!"

"What about him?" Carly frowned.

"How the heck am I supposed to compete with _that_?" Freddie groaned.

"Um, what exactly are you competing with him for?" Carly asked.

"Come on, Carls, are you _blind_?" Freddie said as he began to nervously pace. "That over-sized biker dude just spent the whole afternoon alone with _my _girlfriend!"

"Well, yeah, because you didn't want to go to that motorcycle show with her," Carly pointed out. "I thought you were happy she found someone to do that sort of thing with so you wouldn't have to."

"I didn't know the guy was another, you know, _guy_!" Freddie exclaimed. "If I knew the alternative to me going there with her was _him _going with her, I would've gladly suffered through that motorcycle show!"

"I still don't see what the problem is," Carly said.

"You saw the dude," Freddie sighed. "Heavily tattooed, on parole…he's the exact sort of guy that Sam used to like."

"Yeah, used to," Carly nodded. "She's not into that anymore."

"But if she keeps hanging around Brody, she may get _back _into it," Freddie mumbled. "And in case you haven't noticed, Carly, I've never been on parole once, and I don't have a speck of ink on my body."

"You're being ridiculous," Carly laughed. "Sam's not gonna fall in love with Brody just because he has some tattoos and got in trouble with the cops. But if it seriously is going to bug you, why don't you just tell Sam it makes you sort of uncomfortable when she hangs around him."

"I can't do that; I don't want to be one of those clingy boyfriends that tells his girlfriend she can't have other guy friends," Freddie said.

"Well, okay," Carly shrugged. "I still say you've got nothing to worry about."

"Hopefully," Freddie mumbled darkly.

…

The next afternoon, Carly and Gibby were sitting in the Shay's living room, working on homework.

"Hey, I don't get this whole mitosis thing," Gibby said. "I thought mitosis was a brand of toothpaste."

"Um, no," Carly frowned. "It's when a cell-"

"No, I'm pretty sure it's toothpaste," Gibby said, closing his textbook. "Which means I've got to write _another _email to these book publishers. Last week I read something in here about there being something called the mitochondria in the cell, when everyone _knows _that's a car part."

"Oh Gibby," Carly sighed.

All of the sudden, the front door flew open and Sam stormed in. "Unbelievable!"

"About all the mistakes in our biology book, right?" Gibby said.

"No!" Sam snapped, thumping him on the head.

"What's up?" Carly asked.

"I stopped by Frednub's place just now," Sam said angrily. "You know, trying to be a good girlfriend and all that chiz, and he's over there tutoring some chick!"

"Oh yeah, I think he mentioned that while you were at your motorcycle show yesterday," Carly said. "Why are you so upset about him tutoring someone? He's getting paid; more money for him to spend on meats for you."

"Um, have you _seen _the girl he's working with?" Sam asked.

"No. What's wrong with her?"

"She's crazy hot!" Sam exclaimed. "They're all cozy on his couch going over physics or something."

"I'm sure she's not _that _hot," Carly said.

"Oh really?" Sam said, raising an eyebrow. "Come here, Shay." She grabbed Carly's wrist and dragged her outside to the hall.

"Wait, I don't think we should just barge in there if Freddie's working-" Carly said as Sam opened up the Benson's door. "Okay, clearly I'm being ignored."

"Oh, hey Sam, Carly," Freddie said, looking up from a textbook that was sitting on the coffee table. A tall, blonde girl wearing a very short skirt was sitting next to him. "Sam, you just met Megan. Megan, that's my friend Carly."

"Hi!" Megan smiled.

"Um, sorry to interrupt your little…_tutoring session_," Sam said. "But Carly got this sudden craving for some tofu bars. Do you have any she can eat?"

"Yeah, my mom just bought some, they're in the kitchen," Freddie said. "I didn't know you like tofu, Carly."

"Well…apparently now I do," Carly said as her and Sam went into the Benson's kitchen.

"You see!" Sam whispered. "She's smokin'!"

"Alright, her hotness is…above average," Carly admitted. "But Freddie's just tutoring her. There's no need to get worked up over it."

"What do you mean there's no need to get worked up over it?" Sam said. "Look how close that troll's sitting to Freddie! I bet she doesn't even need help in physics. She just wanted an excuse to get her grimy little paws on him!"

"Okay…I think we're being a little paranoid here," Carly said. "But if you're so upset about her, why don't you just make some excuse to go in there and sit with them? I'm sure Freddie wouldn't mind."

"Please, that'd make me look like some clingy girlfriend who wants to cut Freddie off from the rest of the female population," Sam sighed. "I've got more pride than that, Shay."

"If you say so," Carly shrugged. "But I'm positive, Sam. Megan's not trying to steal Freddie from you."

"You better be right about that," Sam mumbled as her and Carly headed out of the Benson's apartment.

…

"Gibby! Do you have the paint on yet?" Carly called.

"Are you sure this gold paint is safe for me to put all over my body?" Gibby yelled back from the bathroom.

"Um, yeah, sure," Carly nodded. "Just come out."

Gibby walked out of the bathroom, covered from head to toe in sparkly gold paint.

"Alright, perfect," Carly smiled. "We're all set for our Gold Boy bit now. Just go upstairs and wait in the studio; Sam and Freddie should be here soon, and then we can start the show."

"Kay kay," Gibby said as he headed up.

"Hola roja," Freddie said, letting himself in.

"Hey, I thought you were gonna come by earlier to set up the green screen," Carly said.

"I got a little busy," Freddie grinned, rolling up his sleeve. "Take a look at this."

"Oh my God! Is that a tattoo?" Carly exclaimed, looking at the image of an anchor on Freddie's bicep.

"Sure is," Freddie nodded.

"A _real _one?"

"Well, no," Freddie admitted. "It's henna."

"Why'd you get a henna tattoo?" Carly asked. "I thought you didn't really like body art-Wait, is this because you're jealous of that Brody guy?"

"Okay fine, yes," Freddie sighed. "But if I want to keep Sam interested in me with that idiot stomping around here, I need to do everything I can!"

"Freddie, you're being ridiculous," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Besides, why'd you get an _anchor _of all things?"

"Because it's manly," Freddie replied. "And look, could you not tell Sam this is henna? Or that I did because I'm…jealous?"

"Fine," Carly groaned. "Just get up there with Gibby and start setting up the green screen."

"Yup," Freddie nodded, hurrying up the stairs.

"Honestly, boys are so stupid," Carly laughed to herself. "They're so-Whoa!"

Sam had just walked in, but she wasn't wearing her usual attire. She had traded in her jeans and boots for a short, pink dress and a pair of heels. Her hair was straightened and she was wearing more make-up than she normally did.

"You like?" Sam asked, spinning around to show off her dress.

"Okay, is this about you being jealous over that Megan girl Freddie's tutoring?" Carly asked.

"No, maybe I just wanted to get dressed up today," Sam retorted.

"Sam," Carly said, crossing her arms. "You went to our eighth grade dance in jeans and a tank top. You would _never _get dressed up for no reason."

"Alright, yeah, it's because of that Megan girl," Sam sighed. "I was thinking yesterday, and I realized if I can show Freddie that _I _can doll myself up just like her, he won't fall for any of her girly wooness."

"Wooness?"

"It's a word," Sam snapped.

"Sam, you don't need to get all dressed up," Carly told her. "Megan's no threat to you."

"Yeah, not when I'm wearing this she's not," Sam smirked. "So are we ready to do the show?"

"But-Oh, whatever. Yes, we're ready," Carly said.

"Good," Sam nodded. "Oh, and don't mention this whole jealousy thing to Freddie, okay?"

"Yeah, sure," Carly sighed.

The girls walked up to the studio, where Gibby was taking pictures of himself covered in paint and Freddie was adjusting the green screen.

"Hey, can one of you girls hand me the-Whoa!" he took one look at his girlfriend and nearly dropped his camera.

"You like my new dress?" Sam asked, walking over to him and giving him a long kiss.

"Uh, _yeah _I do," Freddie nodded. "Why are you all dressed up though?"

"Oh you know, just thought I'd look good today," Sam shrugged, trying not to wince at how much her heels were hurting her feet. "Hang on, what's that on you arm? An anchor?"

"Oh yeah, like my tattoo?" Freddie asked.

"You got a tattoo?!"

"Yup," Freddie said proudly.

"But isn't your mom going to freak?" Sam asked.

"Hey, my mom doesn't control me," Freddie said. "I live on the edge."

"Oh my God," Carly said under her breath.

"Um, wow," Sam nodded. "Hey, sniff my neck. I just got this really fancy perfume."

"Smells good, baby," Freddie said. "But I thought you hated those fancy perfumes."

"Well, I thought I'd give them a try," Sam replied.

"Oh…well I went to the convenience store today and I threw my iced tea bottle in the trash can instead of the recycling bin, and a cop who was parked outside stopped me and gave me a warning," Freddie grinned.

"I spent a whole hour getting ready this morning. I woke up early and everything," Sam said.

"Okay!" Carly said loudly. "You two are gonna make me puke on both of you. So I'm ending this."

"What do you mean?" Freddie frowned.

"Carly…" Sam said, giving her a look.

"Sam," Carly said. "Freddie's jealous of Brody. Freddie, Sam's jealous of Megan. Discuss. Now let's go, Gibby, let's let these two talk."

"Is this paint supposed to be burning?" Gibby asked as Carly dragged him out of the studio.

"I'm gonna kill her," Sam mumbled.

"Yeah, I hear you," Freddie muttered. He looked at his girlfriend. "But is what she said true? Are you really jealous of Megan?"

"Well…ugh! Okay, yeah, I am!" Sam conceded. "But you can't tell me you don't think she's hot! How am I supposed _not _be jealous when she's sitting all pressed up against you 'studying'?"

"I don't think she's hot," Freddie said simply.

"Yeah, right," Sam scoffed. "You're just saying that."

"No, I'm serious," Freddie said. "I don't think she's _ugly_, but I'm not attracted to her either. She just seems like the type of girl that only cares about her appearance and wears a ton of makeup to get guys to look at her. I'm not into that."

"But you just told me how good _I _looked," Sam pointed out. "And I'm dressed just like she is right now."

"Well, first of all, I'm only human, Sam, and that dress looks _amazing _on you," Freddie said. "And it's not like I was lying. I think you look nice, yeah, but honestly baby, you don't need to do all that to be hot. I think you're beautiful no matter what you wear."

"Oh," Sam said, blushing, as she looked at the floor. "Well then I'm taking these heels off. They're already covered in my foot blood."

"Good call," Freddie laughed.

"And hey, what about you?" Sam said as she kicked off her shoes. "Are you seriously jealous of Brody?"

"Kind of," Freddie sighed. "He just seems like the sort of guy a girl like you would want to date, not some tech nerd who would probably crash any motorcycle I tried to drive."

"But, baby, I thought you were happy I found someone to go to all those motorcycle shows and places with," Sam said. "You hate going to those things."

"Maybe I'd hate going alone," Freddie said. "But you could make any place entertaining for me, Sam."

"So that's why you got a tattoo then?" Sam asked. "Because you wanted to be more like Brody?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded.

"Aw, baby," Sam laughed. "I don't want to date a guy like Brody. I couldn't handle dating a guy that gets arrested every week and wants to spend all his money on tattoos instead of food. It would be like dating my mom!"

"So you don't want some hardcore biker boyfriend?" Freddie asked.

"Not even a little," Sam smiled, leaning up to kiss him. "I have a thing for nerds."

"Good thing I know a nerd then," Freddie chuckled, returning the kiss.

"I still can't believe you got a tattoo though," Sam said when they pulled apart.

"It's fake," Freddie told her.

"Oh, well your mom's still going to murder you," Sam replied.

"Yup," Freddie sighed. "I know."


	288. Chapter 288

**AN-Hey, to the reader who requested this oneshot (it was an anonymous request), I don't watch Everybody Hates Chris, so I didn't really know what you meant by the whole contract thing. I gave it a try, though, lol. Hope you liked how it turned out!**

**Oh, this takes place after iOMG, and in this oneshot, iLost my Mind NEVER HAPPENED!**

…

_Question_

"Sam?" Freddie called as her ran through the hallways. "Sam? Where'd you go? Sam?"

"Freddie!" Carly exclaimed, surprising Freddie as she ran around a corner.

"Oh, um, h-hey, Carly," Freddie said, trying to act natural. "Have you seen Sam, by any chance?"

"No, not since she had her lips pressed against you!" Carly said.

Freddie gasped. "You know? How?"

"I saw you two!"

"You _saw_?"

"Oh, if you don't want people to watch you, you should kiss somewhere without windows!" Carly snapped.

"Hey, Sam kissed _me_," Freddie said.

"What? Why? What the heck happened out there?" Carly asked.

"I don't know!" Freddie said. "I went to find her after you told me that you guys had a little argument about her liking Brad. I was telling her that she shouldn't be scared of showing her feelings, and then she just…kissed me."

"Oh my God," Carly said softly. "I've been so stupid! All this time I thought she was crushing on Brad…but it was you!"

"Me?" Freddie said, his eyes widening. "But-But you said that Sam's been hanging around Brad a lot, and she's been so nice lately-"

"Freddie, open your eyes!" Carly said. "Whenever she hung out with Brad, _you _were always there too. And she hasn't been nice only to Brad lately, she's been nice to you too! That's why she wanted to work on your project with you guys! Oh, she's smart. She knew that we'd think she liked Brad before we thought she liked you…I can't believe she never told me! This is insane! What are you gonna do?"

"I don't know," Freddie sighed, sitting down against a row of lockers.

"You-You don't know?" Carly frowned.

"Well, first I have to actually _find _Sam," Freddie said. "She ran off right after we kissed; she said 'sorry', and then she was gone! And I was too stunned to even move my feet for another minute."

"Okay, well after you find her, _then _what are you going to do?" Carly asked.

"I still don't know, Carly," Freddie said. "_Never_, in a million years, would I have thought Sam Puckett would like _me_. This is all just so…sudden."

"So you don't want to go out with her then?" Carly asked softly.

"I didn't say that," Freddie said. "I mean, I've never really thought about it. Sure, we've kissed, I guess, but she's Sam…She's _Sam_. She's crazy and loud and-and funny. And pretty. And really cool."

"Freddie," Carly said seriously. "I'm not just saying this because Sam's my best friend, but you know Sam. She's like, the _worst _person when it comes to feelings. But she took a big leap in kissing you tonight. I think that means something, don't you?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. He got to his feet. "I'm gonna keep looking for her. She's got to be here somewhere; they locked us in."

"Freddie, what are the odds of a _locked door _holding Sam in?" Carly asked.

"Right," Freddie sighed.

…

"Sam!" Freddie said, knocking on Sam's door the next morning. "Sam! Will you please open up? I know you're in there. I just wanna talk to you."

But there was so response, and Freddie's knuckles were beginning to get sore.

"Alright," Freddie said to himself, pulling a bag of bacon out of his pocket. "Plan B…Sam! If you want this special Bolivian bacon, you'd better open the door and-"

The door suddenly flew open and a hand grabbed the bag before Freddie could even react, and the door slammed shut again.

"You can't just take the bacon and go back to hiding out!" Freddie exclaimed. "That's not how that was supposed to work!"

Kicking a dead potted plant in frustration, Freddie suddenly spotted an open window on the other side of the house. Well…it didn't look like he was getting in the house any other way…

He hurried over to the window, pushed in the screen and heaved himself in, falling face first into the Puckett's living room.

"Are you _kidding _me?" Sam exclaimed, looking up from her spot on the sofa. "You climbed through my _window_?"

"Well you wouldn't answer the door!" Freddie said, scrambling to his feet. "Look, this is ridiculous. Can we just _talk _about the kiss?"

"No," Sam said firmly. "Now leave, before I sic Frothy on you!"

"Sam," Freddie sighed, sitting down next to her on the couch. "Come on. We can't exactly ignore what happened last night-"

"Yeah we can," Sam snapped, getting up, turning her back to him. "I-I was really tired. I've never stayed up until midnight actually _working _before; I was delirious! So-So when I kissed you, I-I, um thought I was dreaming and was kissing Justin Timberlake."

"Okay," Freddie said, walking so he was right behind her. "If that's really the case, can you just answer one question for me?"

"What?" she mumbled.

"Why'd you run away? Why have you been so intent on avoiding me?"

Sam didn't answer.

"Sam?" Freddie said gently, putting his hand on her shoulder, which she immediately shrugged off. "What did the kiss mean?"

Sam didn't reply.

"You know I'm gonna stay here until we get somewhere with this," Freddie said stubbornly. "So the longer you give me the silent treatment, the longer I'm-"

"Can we please not do this?" Sam groaned, turning around. "Look, it doesn't matter what the kiss really meant because-because even if it _did _mean that I sort of, you know, _like _you, it's not like you'd like me back or anything, and we wouldn't be a couple or whatever, so why can't you just-"

"Why are you so sure of that?" Freddie asked.

"Oh, right," Sam scoffed. "We both know your ideal girl is a girl like Carly, who's all sweet and girly and nice. Not me. If it had been Carly who had kissed you at the lock-in, I'm sure you would've been a lot less freaked out."

"Actually," Freddie frowned. "I think I would've been _very _freaked out. I'm not the same doofy kid who used to follow Carly around because I had a gigantic crush on her. I like hanging around Carly because she's my _friend_. But I don't want to date her or be her boyfriend anymore. And, okay, I was a _little _freaked out when you kissed me last night, but that was more because of the shock. I mean one second I'm talking to you, trying to convince you to go tell Brad that you like _him_, and the next second you, well, you know. It was a lot to take in."

"Whatever," Sam said. "I'm sorry I 'shocked you' last night. Now for the millionth time can you just _leave_? We talked, just like you wanted."

"Yeah, we did," Freddie said, staying put. "But we still haven't talked about what I feel."

"What are you talking about? You just said you were shocked."

"At first, yeah," Freddie agreed. "But you know, Sam, as much as you would always torment me and cause my physical and emotional pain, I've never thought you were repulsive or anything."  
"Well gee, thanks," Sam said sarcastically.

"I just mean," Freddie said. "That I'm not _un_attracted to you. And, if you're willing to, I'd really like to give, you know, _us, _a try."

Sam looked at him. "You serious?"

"If I wasn't serious, do you think I would've tried to find a way out of the school last night so I could come talk to you then, only to be caught by Mr. Howard, who gave me a weeks worth of detention, and then spend an hour today knocking on your door and finally being desperate enough to climb in here through your window?"

Sam looked a little skeptical. "So, what? You-You really wanna try out this whole boyfriend-girlfriend thing? You're not just over here trying to be nice or because Carly made you or something?"

"I'm not just trying to be nice, Sam," Freddie told her. "And no one made me come here besides myself. And yes, I'm willing to try this out if you are. That kiss last night…I-I actually _did _sort of enjoy it."

"You did?"

"I did," Freddie nodded. "So what do you say? Are we gonna do this?"

Sam pondered this for a moment. "Okay, Benson, let me just get a couple of things clear. I may _like _you, but that does _not _mean that I'm gonna be all head over heels for you. I'm still gonna insult you occasionally, and I'm still gonna cream you at arm wrestling."

"Alright," Freddie said, opening his bag and pulling out a sheet of paper. "That sounds fair. Here, just sign this. It's a relationship contract I made up."

"What?" Sam exclaimed. "You want me to sign a _contract_?"

"It's just few things that _I _want to make clear," Freddie said. "First of all, are you willing to be seen in public with me and acknowledge that I am, in fact, your boyfriend? You know, hold hands in school, quick kisses in the halls; that sort of thing?"

"You want all that in a contract?"

"Yup, if we're gonna try and make this work, you can't be afraid to let the whole world know you like a 'nub'," Freddie told her.

Sam rolled her eyes. "Alright, whatever."

"And the other thing that's in this contract," Freddie said. "Is the agreement that in the even that this relationship _doesn't _work out, for whatever reason, we're not going to hold it over each other. We'll got back to being friends, just like before. I don't want to risk loosing our friendship, Sam."

Sam nodded. "Yeah…okay fine, I'll sign this stupid contract."

"Thank you," Freddie said, handing her a pen.

"So," Sam said, handing him the contract back. "What do we do now?"

"Well," Freddie said, holding out his hand for her. "We can go have our official first date at the Groovy Smoothie?"

Sam smiled, taking Freddie's hand. "Sounds good to me."


	289. Chapter 289

**AN-Hey, again, for whoever sent in this request, I tried my best with it, but I was a little confused by what you meant when you said Sam wanted Freddie to say he enjoyed their activities. Anyway, I hope you like how it turned out!**

…**.**

_Wind_

"Oh man, I'm freaking out!" Carly said, anxiously running a brush through her hair.

"Why are you freaking out?" Freddie frowned. Him and Sam were sitting on the loveseat in Carly's room, his arm around his girlfriend.

"It's her fourth date with Josh," Sam explained.

"I still don't know what dress to wear, whether to go with lipstick or lip gloss, and where the _heck_ is my eyelash curler?" Carly exclaimed.

"You lent it to Gibby, remember?" Sam told her.

"Aw man! How am I supposed to rock this date with uncurled eyelashes?" Carly moaned.

"Chill, I think I have one in my bag," Sam said, getting to her feet so she could look through her backpack on Carly's bed.

"You _own _an eyelash curler?" Freddie said.

"Eh, Melanie gave it to me for our birthday last year," Sam shrugged, tossing the curler to Carly.

"Alright, well that's one catastrophe avoided," Carly sighed. "But I still have the…_other thing_, to worry about."

"What other thing?" Sam asked, sitting back down by Freddie.

"Well, maybe you two can help me with this, you're _way _past your fourth date," Carly said, sitting down in the chair across from them.

"Sure," Freddie nodded. "Shoot."

"Okay," Carly began. "Well, on our last few dates, Josh and I have just been, you know, at that 'hand-holding level'. He'll kiss me when he picks me up and when he drops me off, we'll sort of flirt with each other during the actual date, but that's really it. And I've been fine with that, but now that we're on our fourth date, and things look like they're going to work out between me and Josh, I'd like to…get past the hand-holding level. And I realized that I sort of have the reputation as like this innocent girl, so Josh is probably a little hesitant to do anything, so it's gonna have to be me who starts things."

"Wait, Carly?" Sam frowned. "Do you mean-"

"No! Sam, if I wanted to talk about doing _that _I would've kicked Freddie out!" Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Oh thank God," Freddie said, relieved.

"I just want to kind of make our dates to be a little more…spontaneous," Carly continued. "So I was wondering, what do you guys do? I mean do you play footsies? Do you whisper in each other ear? How often do you kiss each other? I don't want to do it too much and have him think I'm some freak, but I don't want to do it just twice a night either."

"Well, well, well," Sam grinned. "Looks like we're officially the relationship experts in this group, baby."

"Ah how the tables have turned," Freddie laughed as he gave Sam a high-five, followed by a kiss.

"Are you guys gonna help me out here or not?" Carly asked.

"Of course we'll help you kid, we'd be happy to impart our wisdom onto you," Sam said. She turned to Freddie. "Did I use 'impart' right?"

"Yes you did."

"Sweet!"

"Um, not to rush you, but Josh is gonna be here soon," Carly said. "Freddie, turn the other way so I can get dressed while you talk."

"Well, when Fredbutt and I go out on our dates," Sam told Carly as Freddie turned around. "Right before we go into the restaurant or movie theatre or wherever, I take him aside and we-"

"Make-out? Yeah, I know," Carly nodded. "Spencer and I saw you one time outside Pink Bunny. Okay, so pull him aside before we go into the restaurant, got it. And I just make out with him there?"

"Well I always sort of play with Freddie's hair while we're doing it," Sam shrugged. "And Josh has better hair than Freddie, so you should have fun with that."

"Hey!" Freddie said indignantly.

"Well then tell your mom to stop buying you that disgusting anti-tick shampoo," Sam retorted, rolling her eyes.

"Okay, what else?" Carly asked desperately as she pulled on her dress. "What about during dinner?"

"Um…okay, you're going to Pini's, right?" Sam said.

"Right."

"Alright, well you know how the couple booths have the seats around three sides of the table? So you can either sit across from your date or right next to each other?" Sam explained.

"Uh-huh," Carly nodded. "We usually sit across from each other."

"Sit next to him tonight," Sam told her. "Because that way, your knees will keep accidently knocking into each other, and also you can _casually _scoot right next to him, which is the universal invitation that you want him to put your arm around him."

"I never knew that," Carly said, fascinated. "All these years of reading dating tips out of magazines…I thought I was the date guru!"

"Hey, sometimes you've just got to get the experience," Sam said modestly.

"And that really works?" Carly asked.

"It does with this one, right Fredbag?"

"Yup," Freddie nodded, still facing away from them.

"And we're gonna go to the movies after dinner," Carly said, sliding on her heels. "What do I do there?"

"Well, first thing, you _don't _want to eat the entire bucket of popcorn before the movie starts," Sam said. "Because _apparently _when the guy buys that, he has 'the intention of sharing it between the two of you for the entire duration of the movie'."

"Hey, movie popcorn's expensive!" Freddie defended.

"Um, well, strangely enough I _did _know that," Carly chuckled. "But come on, impart more wisdom on me!"

"What movie are you going to see?" Sam asked.

"That new one that's supposed to have action, comedy, horror, and romance," Carly replied. "Um…_Mike and Melinda's Kwanza Getaway_. It's supposed to be the perfect date night movie."

"Ugh, sounds terrible," Sam cringed. "But whatever. Anytime the couple in that movie kisses or does something coupley, just sort of roll your eyes and whisper, 'wow, that's so fake', and then _he'll _whisper back-"

"We should show them how it's done!" Freddie cried. "You-I-I feel so played!"

"Whoa, that's-that's brilliant!" Carly said. "Wow, Sam. You're-You're actually really good at this! I'm so proud of you!" She ran over and hugged her best friend.

"Yeah, yeah," Sam said, patting Carly on the back. "Just have fun tonight."

"Carly!" Spencer called from downstairs. "Josh is here!"

"Oh, yay!" Carly grinned. "Thanks so much you two. Freddie? Any pointers _you _have for me?"

"Um, nope, I think Sam covered everything," Freddie said. "Good luck on your date, Carls."

Carly grabbed her purse and ran out of her room, leaving Sam and Freddie alone.

"Um, hey, baby?" Sam asked. "Can I ask you something?"

"What's up?" Freddie asked.

"Well, it's just…when I was telling Carly all that stuff," she sighed. "You were kind of quiet."

"I was?"

"Yeah," she said, looking down. "I-I mean, do you _like _when I do all that stuff when we're together?"

"What? Of course I do!" Freddie nodded.

"Oh," Sam said, still looking down.

"Why wouldn't you think I wouldn't like them?" Freddie asked.

"Well you've never exactly _said _that you do," Sam mumbled. "I-I've always just assumed. I just wanted to make sure…"

"Sam, I enjoy every second of it," Freddie told her earnestly, tilting her chin up to kiss her.

"Good," Sam smiled when they pulled apart. "'Cause I enjoy it too." She leaned up to kiss him again.

"Wait a minute though," Freddie frowned when they broke. "Last week, when we were at the park and it was really windy…were you _actually _cold, or did you just want an excuse for me to give you my jacket?"

"Pfft, I can't give away _all _my secrets, Fredward!" Sam said. "But let's just say…you won't be getting that jacket back anytime soon."

"Huh, I never knew my girlfriend was so clever," Freddie laughed, wrapping his arms around her.


	290. Chapter 290

_Curve_

"Gibby stand still!"

"But this stuff is so slimy!" Gibby moaned as Spencer covered him with paper mache.

"Umm…" Carly frowned as she came downstairs, staring at the scene. "What's going on down here?"

"I'm _trying _to be a good person and help Gibby make his mom a birthday present," Spencer said, wiping his goo-covered hands with a towel. "But he keeps squirming."

"Because you didn't tell me this would take so long! Its been three hours and we're not even halfway done!" Gibby defended.  
"Wait, what kind of present are you trying to _make _your mom?" Carly asked.

"A paper mache model of me," Gibby told her. "So she can put it in our living room."

"Yeah…that's not creepy," Carly said, sitting down on the counter so she could use the computer.

"What are you doing on there?" Spencer asked. "I'm downloading a video of a snake eating a squirrel, so don't close any windows!"

"Relax, your gross snake video is fine," Carly laughed. "I just wanted to log onto Splashface for a little bit before Sam comes over to do this bit for iCarly."

"Um, Spence?" Gibby said as Spencer began to apply the paper mache to his neck. "How exactly are you gonna get me out of this once it dries?"

"Oh, see, I'm gonna cut a whole in the bottom of it and then we can just lift the dried sculpture right off you," Spencer explained. "Which is why you have to hold your arms straight up! You can't keep curving them."

"You expect me to hold my arms like this until this thing dries?" Gibby exclaimed.

"It will be good exercise!"

"Hey," Carly said, looking at the computer monitor. "Look at this cute picture Sam posted of her and Freddie."

She turned the monitor so Spencer and Gibby could see the picture. The two were sitting on Sam's sofa, laughing and holding hands as Freddie kissed her nose.

"Aw," Spencer smiled. "How sweet."

"I thought Sam wasn't a big fan of those 'couple pictures' everyone posts on Splashface of them and their boyfriend, but I guess she had a change of heart," Carly said. "She even put a caption on it 'Only nub in the world who can make me smile like this. Don't know what I'd do without him'. Aw! Isn't that adorable."

"_Sam_ wrote that?" Gibby frowned.

"Yeah, you sure it wasn't aliens or someone?" Spencer asked.

"Okay, yeah, it does sort of sound un-Samish," Carly admitted. "But I think it's nice. I mean, when Sam and Freddie first started going out, Freddie had to practically beg her to change her status from single to 'in a relationship' on here. I think this means that she's really beginning to mature enough not to be afraid of what other people think about her feelings. And it looks like a lot of people are having my same reaction; nearly fifty people have liked the picture. You know, I think she should go ahead and make this her profile pic. It's _really _good."

"You see? Now why couldn't you have been this supportive of the picture I put on Splashface last week?" Gibby asked.

"Because that picture has made me unable to look at overalls the same way!" Carly said, shuddering.

"Hey," Sam said, walking into the apartment. She frowned, looking at Spencer and Gibby. "What are you clowns doing?"

"I'm gonna give my mom a Gibby sculpture for her birthday," Gibby said.

"I'd hit that sculpture with a hammer," Sam said. She turned to Carly. "So we ready to shoot that Peppy Cola thing for iCarly? I brought the sparklers."

"Yeah, sure," Carly nodded.

"Just let me check my Splashface account first," Sam said. "My phone keeps telling me I have a bunch of notifications from it, but it won't let me log onto the site. Maybe my penguin on Articville finally managed to get enough ice cubes to start his Sno-Cone factory!"

"Nah, it's probably just all the people who liked that picture you put up this morning," Carly told her. "Very cute, by the way. Remind me to print it out and I can frame it in that sparkly purple frame I got from Glitter Gloss. It would look nice on your dresser."

"What picture?" Sam frowned. "I didn't upload any picture this morning."

"Yeah you did, I just saw it," Carly told her. "The one of you and Freddie all snugly on your couch."

"Pfft, I definitely didn't upload any picture of Fredbag and me," Sam laughed. "Come on, you know how much I hate those chicks who sit there and plaster their profiles with gushy pics of their boyfriends."

"Oh really? Then explain this, Puckett," Carly said, pulling the picture up.

"What?" Sam exclaimed, her eyes widening at the picture. "I-I have no idea how that got on the Internet."

"See, I told you there was no way Sam wrote that caption!" Gibby said.

"Caption?" Sam repeated, looking closer at the picture. "Aw man!"

"Wait, so you're saying someone took that picture of you and Freddie _in your house_," Carly frowned. "And then uploaded it on your Splashface account without you knowing? _And _added a sappy caption?"

"Whoa, that's pretty serious," Spencer said. "Maybe you should call someone about that…"

"No," Sam mumbled. "I-I _did _take the picture…And write the caption. But it wasn't supposed to go up on Splashface! It was just supposed to go in my own _private _album on my phone."

"You must've accidently turned on that feature on your phone that automatically uploads all your pictures to your Splashface account," Carly told her.

"Well, whatever, I'm taking this down," Sam said firmly.

"Oh come on, it's not that big of a deal, everyone thought it was really adorable," Carly said. "Is it really _so _bad that people see how happy you and Freddie are together."

"Yes!"

"Hey, I thought I heard you over here, Sam," Freddie said, smirking, as he let himself into the apartment. "You know, there's nothing I like better than waking up to a bunch of Splashface notifications of people telling me how _precious _me and my girlfriend look in the picture she just uploaded of us."

"Shut up!" Sam snapped. "My phone did that on its own by accident."

"I figured," Freddie chuckled, giving her a quick kiss.

"Don't worry, I'm taking it down now," Sam said.

"Oh, you are?" Freddie said, sounding disappointed. "Why?"

"Um, do you _want _me to keep it up?" Sam frowned.

"Well I just thought it was a nice picture of us," Freddie shrugged. "And we don't have too many of us on Splashface…But it's up to you, baby. You can take it down if you want."

He turned to Spencer. "Hey, I need to show you this really cool Cloak of Doom I just got on World of Warlords really quick before I go set up the cameras for the iCarly bit we're doing today."

"You traded your Staff of Sincerity?" Spencer gasped.

"Nope, I got it for three Flundernut feathers and a Dorkin," Freddie said proudly.

"You jest!" Spencer said excitedly. "You care if we use your big screen in your room, Carly?"

"Actually, I-"

"Thanks!" Spencer yelled as him and Freddie ran upstairs.

"Yeah, but they make fun of me for being excited when my shoe catalogues come in the mail," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Yeah, because the 180 pairs of shoes in your closet are _really _getting lonely," Sam chuckled. "Come on, we should go set everything up in the studio."

"Okay, but I thought you were gonna take down that picture first," Carly said.

Sam shrugged. "Eh…I guess it's not _that _bad."


	291. Chapter 291

**AN-As usual, since this oneshot is focused on Sam and Freddie's kids, there's another oneshot I uploaded with it in the next chapter. **

**Anyway, I got a request to do iOMG but with this generation, so here it is!**

…**..**

_Pilot_

"Wow, did a bake shop blow up in here?" Carly asked as she walked into the Benson's kitchen, looking around at the piles of dishes and baking ingredients scattered everywhere.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, it's sort of messy," Sam shrugged, looking up from the pan she was digging into. "But it was so worth it. Look what I made!"

"Um, what is it?" Carly frowned, staring down at the pan, which was filled with a very gooey looking mixture.

"Well," Sam said proudly. "I stuffed brownies with cookie dough, baked them, dipped them in caramel, rolled them in chocolate chips, and then topped it off with whipped cream and powdered sugar. These things are amazing! I should paten them or something."

"Sam," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Do you know how much sugar is probably in your little creation? You might've been able to get away with eating that sort of thing when you were younger, but you're not a teenager anymore. You really need to start trying to eat healthier."

"Carly…" Sam grinned, pushing the pan towards her best friend. "You want one?"

"I thought you'd never ask," Carly laughed, taking one of Sam's deserts. "Oh my God! This is incredible!"

"Isn't it?" Sam nodded. "So you here to take the kids to that stupid lock-in?"

"Yeah, I can't believe Ridgeway still has them," Carly said. "Anyway, you're picking Clarissa up tomorrow morning, right?"

"Freddie is," Sam corrected. "I'm not waking up at eight on a Saturday!"

"Of course, what was I thinking," Carly laughed. She looked at her Pearphone. "We should probably get going soon. They're locking the doors at nine."

"Yeah, okay. Hey, Clarissa! Your mom's here to take you guys to the lock-in!" Sam called upstairs.

A second later, Carly's daughter Clarissa and Sam and Freddie's twins ran downstairs.

"You guys ready?" Sam asked.

"Yup," Ashton nodded. "Clarissa and I have everything all planned out for our project. It's going to be an A plus for sure."

"What's your project?" Carly asked.

"We're making our own moisturizing face cream," Clarissa replied.

"You went with that?" Sam asked Emma, who was spooning out some of Sam's creation. "I didn't think you would be interested in doing something like that."

"Nah, I'm not working with them," Emma said.

"But you guys always work on these projects together," Carly pointed out.

"Well maybe she finally realized that me and Clarissa aren't going to do all her work for her," Ashton said.

"Who are you working with?" Sam asked.

"Quincy," Emma told her. "And his new friend from the Pottery Club, Andrew. They wanted to see if they could make a maze hard enough for a Portervalley Mouse."

"Whoa, aren't those like, the smartest kind of mice?" Carly said.

"Yeah," Emma nodded. "So I told them I'd help them out with some of the tech chiz. You know, making flashing lights and stuff, since neither of them are good with computers."

"Oh, okay," Sam shrugged. "Well good luck, guys. Your dad's gonna pick the three of you up tomorrow morning."

"Alright, bye!" the kids called as they headed out to Carly's car.

"Um…maybe-maybe I'll just one more bite of this," Carly said, grabbing a little bit more of the brownie-cookie concoction.

…..

"You see, this baby has fifteen dead ends, twelve forked paths and a total of fifty-four turns," Quincy told Ashton and Clarissa. "And it's gonna be even cooler when Emma hooks up her computer to it so we can get flashing lights a bunch of confusing beeps in there."

"Wow, that poor Portervalley Mouse will never get to his cheese," Clarissa said.

"I think this is turning out really good," Quincy's friend, Andrew, said.

"Yeah, nice work, you guys," Ashton nodded. "Come on, Clarissa. We'd better start working on our project."

The girls got up and headed out of the classroom Quincy and Andrew were working in just as Emma returned, carrying an armload of food.

"Hey, I just came back from the food cart," she said brightly. "You guys want some biscotti?"

"Sure," Andrew smiled.

"No!" Quincy yelled, grabbing the biscotti before Andrew could put it in his mouth.

"Um, what up?" Emma frowned.

"I've learned _years _ago not to eat food that you've been alone with for more than five minutes!" Quincy said.

"I didn't do anything to them," Emma said.

"Oh yeah? Then eat one," Quincy smirked.

"Fine," Emma shrugged. She took a biscotti and ate it. "See?"

"I…whatever," Quincy snapped. "Andrew and I finished up the last of them maze. You just need to do the tech stuff and then we get our mouse and do our pilot run."

"Okay," Emma nodded, picking up her laptop. "Wow, you guys did a great job with this. It looks awesome!"

"Thanks," Andrew grinned.  
"It looks _awesome_?" Quincy repeated. "Don't you mean it looks like it was built by two nubs or-or _something _mean?"

"No," Emma said. "I really like it." She began typing some things onto her laptop. "I think I can have the tech stuff done in ten minutes and then we can try this puppy out."

Quincy shook his head, utterly confused. "I-I'm gonna go…somewhere, for a second," he said, heading towards the door. "Be back in a little bit."

Quincy hurried over to the classroom next door, where Ashton and Clarissa, along with a bunch of other students, were working on their projects.

"I think we added too many mint leaves to this batch," Clarissa said, looking at their white mixture. "We need to start over."

"Yeah, you're right," Ashton nodded. "Oh, hey Quincy. What's up?"

"Did Emma hit her head before she came here?" Quincy asked.

"Um, no," Ashton frowned. "Why? What's up?"

"She-She's being nice!"

"Oh no, we'll alert the authorities," Clarissa laughed.

"It's weird!" Quincy defended.

"Yeah…I'm gonna go with Quincy on this one," Ashton nodded. "Emma _has _been acting a little _too _nice lately. Either she's done something _really _bad that we don't know about yet, or-No!"

"What?" Clarissa asked.  
"Don't you realize when Emma started being so nice?" Ashton grinned. "Around last week, when Andrew moved here from Vermont!"

"Oh my God, you're right!" Clarissa squealed.

"Okay…still missing something here," Quincy said.

"Ugh, open your eyes, Gibson!" Ashton said. "She's being nice because she has a little crush on your pal Andrew!"

"What?" Quincy laughed.

"I can't believe she never told us she liked this guy," Clarissa said.

"Eh, she's not really too good with the whole 'liking guys' thing," Ashton shrugged. "You know, we should help her out."

"Yeah!" Clarissa agreed.

"Oh no," Quincy said.

"Oh come on, do it!" Ashton pleaded. "For Emma?"

"Fine," Quincy sighed.

…

"Hey, Emma!" Ashton said, spotting her twin over by the food cart in the hallway. "What's up?"

"Nothing," Emma replied. "I just finished the tech stuff on our maze, but Quincy ran off for some reason, so we have to wait for him before we can do anything else."

"Uh-huh, and how's Andrew?" Ashton grinned.

"Fine," Emma shrugged.

"Really? He's _just _fine?" Ashton smirked, raising an eyebrow.

"Okay, why are you being all weird?" Emma frowned.

"I know you like Andrew!" Ashton exclaimed.

"Um, no I do not," Emma laughed, rolling her eyes.

"Sure you do!" Ashton said.

"No, I don't," Emma repeated. "You've lost it."

"Ugh, why do you always have to be so difficult with these things?" Ashton groaned.

"I'm not being difficult! You're being crazy!" Emma said. "I'm out of here."

"Come on! Just admit that you love him!" Ashton called after her twin.

"No!"

"Hey, so did she admit that she likes him?" Clarissa asked as she walked over to Ashton with Clarissa.

"Nope," Ashton sighed. "She's being stubborn. Which means we have to put plan B into action."

"I'm still not so sure about this…" Quincy said.

"Just go with it," Clarissa told him.

….

"Any idea where Quincy went?" Andrew asked Emma, back in the classroom they were working in.

"Nope," Emma replied, playing around on her laptop.

"Hey, you guys!" Quincy said, walking into the classroom with Ashton and Clarissa. The other students who were inside working on their project looked up. "Our mouse for our project escaped! If everyone could just remain calm while we locate him-"

But the other students had already jumped up, screaming, and ran out of the room, and Quincy ran after them.

"I-I'll go help him," Clarissa said.

"Yeah, we should go try and find the mouse too," Emma nodded as her and Andrew started towards the door.

"No!" Ashton said firmly. "I mean…I think Quincy forgot that he left the mouse in its cage in the other classroom. You two just stay in here." She dimmed the lights. "Have fun…alone."

Emma rolled her eyes, glaring at her twin as she shut the door.

"So…the mouse isn't lost then?" Andrew said awkwardly.

"Guess not…" Emma mumbled.

…..

"I thought you said you put in shay butter!" Clarissa frowned as she rubbed in a little bit of her and Ashton's moisturizer on her finger. "It still feels weird."

"I think that's from the blossom petals we used," Ashton said.

Just then Emma walked into the classroom. "Hey! I'm going to murder both of you!"

"Why?" Clarissa asked innocently.

"Yeah? Why?" Ashton asked.

"Oh don't play dumb!" Emma snapped. "What were you thinking with that stupid little stunt?"

"We just wanted to get you and Andrew alone so that you two could, you know, talk," Clarissa said.

"Ugh! For the last time, I don't love _Andrew_!"

"Well then why have you been acting so nice lately?" Ashton demanded.

"I haven't," Emma mumbled.

"Yeah you have," Clarissa nodded. "Ever since we met Andrew last week."

"Look, Emma, I know we argue a _lot_," Ashton sighed. "But you're my sister, and I love you. I just want you to be happy. I mean, don't you want to have a nice boyfriend for once? Andrew's perfect for you! And you two would be an awesome couple, but for that to happen you have to stop keeping your feelings all bottomed up. Go for it! Make a move!"

"She's right," Clarissa said. "We just want you to be happy."

Emma glared at both of them. "Then stop trying to hook me up with people!" And with that she stormed out of the classroom.

"Wow…she's really angry," Clarissa sighed.

"I know," Ashton nodded. "I'm gonna go talk to her."

"Um, before you do, wanna help me get this stuff off my finger?" Clarissa asked. "It's beginning to burn."

…..

Emma sat miserable out on the patio, trying to think up ways to get back at Ashton. Then she heard one of the back doors of the classroom open up and Quincy walked out…The absolute _last_ person she wanted to see at the moment.

"Hey," he said.

"What?" she snapped. "Did Ashton and Clarissa send you here?"

"No," Quincy replied simply.

"Oh…well then I guess you don't know that we had a little argument."

"No, I know all about that," Quincy said. "I just said they didn't tell me to come find you."

"Good," Emma mumbled.

"But you know they're right," he said.

"Ugh! That's it!" She jumped to her feet and stormed over to him. "Get out of here before you wind up waking up in the hospital tomorrow!"

"You can threaten me all you want," Quincy said, unmoved by her comment. "But they're still right. Look," he took a deep breath. "I know it's sort of hard to confess your feelings for someone that you like, because you never know if that person feels the same way. But you have to stop being so afraid of that, because you never know. Maybe that person will-"

But he was cut off as Emma pressed her lips to his.

…..

Ashton walked into the empty classroom where Emma and the others had been working. She sighed. It looked like Emma was still hiding out from her. She was just about to leave when she heard voices coming from the patio right outside. Curious, she went over and looked out the window, surprised to see Quincy talking to Emma.

"-But you have to stop being so afraid of that," she heard Quincy tell her. "Because you never know. Maybe that person will-"

Ashton gasped as she watched her twin crash her lips to Quincy's. They kissed for nearly eight seconds before they pulled away, Emma looked absolutely startled, and Quincy looking surprised as well.

"I-You- " Quincy stuttered after a moment.

"Sorry," Emma said awkwardly.

"It's-It's cool," Quincy said, still looking shocked.

Ashton slowly backed away from the window before either one of them saw her. At least she knew she was right about Emma being in love…it just looked like she got the boy she was in love _with _a little mixed up.


	292. Chapter 292

_Cook_

"So you remember the plan, Gib?" Carly asked as she set up the last few iCarly props for that evening's web show.

"Yup," Gibby nodded, licking a lemon popsicle. "Hey, where'd Spencer get these things? They're delicious."

"I dunno, the grocery store?" Carly shrugged.

"Well, you know that saying, don't eat yellow snow?" Gibby said. "I'm really glad they don't say anything about not eating yellow popsicles because this thing is _amazing_."

"Will you stop obsessing over your popsicle?" Carly snapped. "The show starts in two minutes! Where the heck are Sam and Freddie?"

Right on cue, Sam and Freddie ran into the studio.

"Sorry we're late," Freddie panted.

"I guess I can forgive you guys because it _is _a special day for you two," Carly smiled, tossing Sam her remote.

"Yeah, his mom just gave us a nice speech about that," Sam smirked. "Or rather, she sat there and kept saying to me 'I can't believe you've ruined my baby's mind for six months now!' And then she tried to serve us some weird casserole with beats and radishes that she cooked."

"I'm sorry about her, baby," Freddie sighed, getting his camera ready. "You know she's a little-"

"Mental?"

"I was going to say protective, but okay," Freddie shrugged. "You girls ready?"

"Yup," Carly said. "Let's do it."

"Okay…in five, four, three, two…"

"Hello lovely webions!" Carly exclaimed.

"And hey to you ugly ones too," Sam grinned.

"Tonight we have a really exciting iCarly for all of you," Carly laughed.

"We're gonna show you how to use your old sneakers to make a smart phone!" Sam said.

"Um, actually, no we're not," Carly smiled. "Gibby, go take the camera from Freddie."

"What's going on?" Freddie frowned as Gibby took his precious camera from his hands.

"As you guys all know," Carly said, pulling Freddie out with her and Sam. "Sam and Freddie have been dating for exactly six months today!" She took Sam's remote and pushed the applause button.

"What are you doing?" Sam asked, confused.

"You'll see," Carly told her. "Anyway, you guys all know that game show that takes married couples and asks them a bunch of questions to see how well the couple really knows each other? Well Gibby and I thought it would be fun to make a game like that here on iCarly for our favorite Internet couple. We call it," she pushed another button on the remote. "iKnow You Best!" The title flashed onto the screen.

"So, Sam, you sit here, with your back to Freddie," Carly told her best friend. "And Freddie, you sit here."

"So you're just gonna ask us a bunch of questions about each other?" Freddie asked as he took his seat. "That doesn't seem so bad."

"Ah, look at our little Freddie, so overly confident," Carly smiled. "Sam, you can go first. Freddie, put on these noise canceling headphones so we won't hear the questions we ask Sam."

"Okey doke," Freddie nodded.

"Okey doke?" Sam scoffed as Freddie put his headphones on. "Clearly there _is _a reason you're behind the camera most of the time."

"Alright, Sam," Carly said, handing Sam three sheets of poster board. "I'm gonna ask you three questions about Freddie, and you write down what you think his answer would be, got it?"

"I have to write things down?" Sam moaned. "Fine, whatever."

"Okay!" Carly said happily. "Gibby! Our game show music please!"

Gibby pressed a button on Freddie's laptop and the studio was filled with music.

"Question one!" Carly began. "If you and Freddie were on a date at a fancy restaurant, and Freddie noticed that his spoon was dirty and unwashed, what would he do? Would he A, politely tell the server? B, use the spoon anyway? Or C, cause a big scene?"

"Um, none of the above," Sam answered.

"Er, Sam, that wasn't a choice," Carly whispered. "You have to pick A, B, or C."

"But Freddie wouldn't do any of those things," Sam told her. "He never uses spoons when we go out, so he wouldn't do anything."

"What?" Carly frowned. "How does he eat soup then?"

"He doesn't order soup," Sam shrugged.

"Sam," Carly said. "Are you absolutely _positive _that you want to use 'none of the above' as your answer?"

"Yup," Sam nodded.

"Okay then," Carly said, trying to keep the game moving. "Question two! You and Freddie are enjoying a nice romantic night in, when all of the sudden, he finds out that there's an all-night _Galaxy Wars _marathon on T.V. that he _really _wants to watch. How do you think Freddie would handle this situation? Would he A, watch one hour of _Galaxy Wars _and then spend the rest of the night with you? B, beg you to watch it with him? Or C, ask if you guys could reschedule your night for tomorrow?"

"None of those," Sam replied.

"Again?" Carly exclaimed.

"You're giving me all the wrong answers!"

"Okay, fine, what answer do you want to give?" Carly asked.

"He'd obviously say that we have to decide it our _usual _way," Sam grinned. "So whoever can go the longest with one of those Peruvian Puff Pepper Candy Balls in their mouth without having to drink any water gets their way."

"Um, are you _sure _that's how Freddie would answer that?" Carly asked hesitantly.

"Yeah," Sam said.

"Well alright then, write that down on the poster board," Carly sighed. "And now our final question! What would you and Freddie be doing on your ideal date night? And since you keep rejecting my answers, I'm just gonna leave it open ended for you."

Sam chuckled. "Sure you want me to answer that live on the web Carls?"

"Sam!" Carly hissed.

"Relax, I'm kidding," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Um…oh okay, I got it. If it was up to Freddie, we'd probably go to some romantic restaurant where the portion sizes couldn't satisfy a pigeon, then we'd go and take a romantic walk on some beach like he's been wanting to do forever, and then we'd end the night back on his fire escape, where we had our first kiss-"

"Aw!" Carly smiled. "That's so sweet!"

"Yup," Sam nodded. "We'd end the night there and have a nice long game of Battle Ship."

"Battle Ship?" Carly repeated. "You-You think Freddie would want to end his ideal date with _Battle Ship_?"

"Uh-huh," Sam said.

"I-Okay," Carly conceded. "Alright. Now Sam, you're gonna put the headphones on and I'm gonna ask Freddie the same three questions…"

…

Carly sighed as Sam took off her headphones. She had just finished asking Freddie his questions, and his answers were just as ridiculous as Sam's. She felt a pang in her gut. She made up this game because she thought it would be a fun way to celebrate her best friend's anniversary, but now it looked like her plan had gone south. In just a few seconds it would be revealed to the entire Internet that Sam and Freddie didn't really know each other as well as everyone had always thought, because she was _sure _there was no way that their ridiculous answers were going to be right about each other.

"Okay, well, now it's time for Sam and Freddie to reveal their own answers for their questions," Carly said to the camera. The couple was still sitting back to back so they couldn't see each other. "So Freddie, we asked Sam what you would do if while at a restaurant together, you realized that your spoon was dirty. Sam, remind our viewers what you answered."

Sam held up her poster board with her answer 'Nothing. Freddie doesn't use spoons when we go out' for the viewers to see.

"All right, Freddie," Carly said, dreading Freddie's response. "What would you do? Politely tell the server, use the spoon anyway, or make a scene?"

"Um, actually, I wouldn't need to do any of those," Freddie said. "I never use spoons when me and Sam go out on dates, so it wouldn't bother me."

"What?" Carly exclaimed. "You mean that was _true_?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "See, my mom has this policy in our house where she only lets me use spoons for utensils, since she claims they're the only safe type with no point edges or anything. And when I'm out with Sam, I really don't want to be reminded of my mom in _any _way, so I just don't use spoons."

"Oh," Carly said, surprised. "I never knew that. It looks like Sam gets herself one point for that question. Now let's see if Freddie got Sam's answer. Freddie, show our viewers your answer again."

Freddie showed his poster board, which read: 'Sam brings her own comically big spoon to every restaurant we go to, so she wouldn't do any of those things'.

"Alright, Sam? Your answer?"

"Well, Mama never leaves home without her own gigantic spoon, so I don't really care how dirty the spoon is," Sam replied.

"Wait, I thought you only had a giant fork?" Carly pointed out.

"It got lonely!"

"Okay then, one point for Freddie," Carly said. "Now lets move onto question two. You guys both gave the same…strange, response, so I'll have you reveal your answers at the same time. Just show the viewers what your wrote down what you thought each others response would be to the question of how to decide how to handle an all-night marathon of _Galaxy Wars _coming on in the middle of a romantic night in."

The couple held up their boards, which both read 'Peruvian Puff Pepper Candy Ball Challenge'.

"Alright, lets hear your own answers now," Carly said.

"Peruvian Puff Pepper Candy Ball Challenge," the couple answered simultaneously.

"Are you kidding me?" Carly frowned. "You really do that?"

"Yeah, it's a great way to settle an argument," Freddie said.

"I have the record," Sam said proudly. "Fourteen seconds."

"But I beat you the other night, didn't I?" Freddie grinned. "And we got to spend a lovely evening at the bagel museum."

"Wow…you guys have some interesting things going on for you," Carly said. "Alright, last question. Sam, let's see how you thought Freddie would describe your ideal date."

Sam held up her poster, which said 'If the nub had it his way, we'd eat at a restaurant with tiny portions, go for a romantic walk on the beach, and then play Battle Ship on his fire escape."

"So Freddie, how _would _you want to spend your ideal date with Sam if it was completely up to you?" Carly asked.

"Hmm, well, we'd start off at a nice restaurant where it's more about the atmosphere than it is about getting gigantic plates of food," Freddie said thoughtfully. "Then I'd take her to the beach, so we could go on a long, romantic walk, and then we'd go back to my place, sit on my fire escape, and play Battle Ship for the rest of the night."

"I-I don't believe it," Carly said. "That's exactly what Sam put!"

"Told you I knew what I was talking about," Sam smirked.

"Okay, well Freddie, let's see if you can tie Sam for a perfect score," Carly said. "Remind us all again what you thought Sam's idea of the ideal date was again?"  
Freddie showed his board, which read 'Going to an all-you-can-eat BBQ rib restaurant, going to a monster truck rally, and then going back to my fire escape to play Battle Ship'.

"So let's hear your ideal date with Freddie, Sam," Carly said.

"Well, we'd go to Mr. Hooper's all-you-can-eat Rib Shack so I can try to get my picture on his wall for eating the most ribs," Sam began. "And then I'd drag the nub to a monster truck rally, which he incorrectly says are 'dangerous'. Oh, and then we'd spend the rest of the night playing Battle Ship on his fire escape."

"Wow! There you have it!" Carly said happily as the couple turned back around to face each other. "Sam and Freddie apparently know each other better than anyone! And since that game took longer than I thought, that's all we have time for tonight. So until next week, make sure you get your milk _only _from mammals!"

"Done!" Gibby said, turning off Freddie's camera.

"That's not what you-never mind," Freddie sighed.

"I'm impressed, you guys," Carly told the couple. "You really know each others weird minds, don't you?"

"Well when you spend six months around her, you learn a few things," Freddie laughed, pulling Sam closer to him as he leaned down to kiss her.

"I've got to ask though," Carly smiled. "What the heck is up with the whole Battle Ship thing?"

"Well, one night we were talking about when we were kids," Sam explained. "And we realized that neither of us had ever won a game of Battle Ship. So we snuck into your apartment, stole Spencer's set, and spent like, five hours out on his fire escape playing, and it just sort of became our thing."

"You know Spencer's been going crazy trying to find that game," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"We'll give it back," Freddie assured her. "Eventually..."


	293. Chapter 293

_Population_

"Well, here we are," Freddie said as him, Sam, Carly and Gibby, along with all their kids, walked into the large Seattle ampatheatre.

"This is really Webicon?" Emma frowned, looking around. "I thought this would be cool. All I see around here are dorks and losers."

"She's not wrong," Sam mumbled.

"Oh come on you guys, this is going to be exciting," Carly said. "I mean, how insane is it that they asked us here to do another session with Webicon for iCarly even though its been like, twenty years since the show ended?"

"Yeah, but you remember what happened here last time," Sam pointed out.  
"What happened?" Jason asked.

"Nothing," Sam, Freddie, and Carly all said quickly.

"Wait, can't you guys at least tell _me _what happened?" Gibby asked. "I wasn't there, remember? I had to deal with my grandpa's crazy antics."

"We already told you what happened years ago!" Freddie hissed.

"You did? Hmm, probably wasn't paying attention then," Gibby shrugged.

"Alright, well we should go check in," Carly said, checking the time on her Pear phone. "We're supposed to meet our guide in ten minutes."

"And we have to find the Fat Shake stand first," Sam reminded them.

"Alright, you guys, make sure you all stick together," Freddie said. "Or if you really have to split, will you at least make sure that someone stays with the younger kids?"

"Who are the young kids?" Tyler asked.

"You, Kirby and Huey," Sam replied, earning herself indignant looks from Tyler and Gibby's two younger sons.

"And remember, the iCarly portion of webicon starts at noon," Carly said. "So make sure you're back by then so you can see you parents in action."

"Was iCarly really that popular back when you guys were teenagers?" Clarissa asked your mom.

"Hey! It was one of the most watched web shows in history!" Carly said.

"Yeah, it made me a star!" Gibby added.

"If you say so, dad," Quincy mumbled.

"Guys, come on, let's just get going," Ashton said. "I want to go see the World of Warlords section."

"I can't believe you _like _that game," Sam said, shaking her head.

"Hey! Don't ruin my daughter's love for the Hoopsher fields and Org armies!" Freddie snapped. "You guys go and have fun there."

"Yeah, I can at least test out my new sling shot on all those freaks dressed up in their lame little 'stumes'," Emma said, pulling a sling shot out of her pocket.

"Wait, Emma, don't-And they're gone," Freddie sighed as the kids all disappeared. "Hopefully Quincy will be able to convince her not to hit _too _many people with that thing."

"Alright, anyway, before we go check in, I think we need to go over our game plan one last time," Carly said. "So we _don't_ have a repeat of what happened last time."

"I still don't know what happened!" Gibby exclaimed.

"You idiot! All our crazy fans started a fan war over who they thought Freddie was dating!" Sam snapped, hitting the back of his head. "Me or Carly."

"Yeah, the Seddies and the Creddies," Freddie nodded.

"But…Sam and Freddie are _married _now," Gibby frowned. "And Carly's married too. How can there be a fan war now?"

"Oh, you know there are still some crazies out there who claim because I smiled at Freddie or something, I sercretly love him," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Besides, Sam and Freddie never announced they were getting married or anything on iCarly. No one knows that they're together."

"Are you guys going to say anything?" Gibby asked.

"No, and you'd better not either!" Sam snapped. "The last thing we want is a bunch of fans freaking out."

"Yeah, that'd be a nightmare," Freddie agreed.

"So we're gonna make sure that we don't talk about our relationships in anyway," Carly said. "That way we can keep this strictly about iCarly. Sam even registered as Sam Puckett instead of Sam Benson. That way her name plate won't give it away either."

"You see? We've thought of everything," Freddie grinned.

"Yeah, yeah, we're good," Sam said. "But seriously, if I don't get a Fat Shake in me in the next two minutes, I'm gonna go crazy."

…

"Oh. My. God," Carly whispered, poking her head out from the curtain, staring into the sea of iCarly fans. "There must be at least a hundred people out there!"

"Yeah, don't you remember what our guide said?" Freddie said. "There was a line of people here to buy tickets when they went on sale, and they sold out of passes to see iCarly in like, ten minutes."

"Insane," Sam said, sipping her Fat Shake.

"Hey," Gibby said, walking through the back door and joining the other three. "We ready?"

"Just about, did you find the kids yet and tell them that it's starting?" Carly asked.

"I found Quincy," Gibby replied.

"And you told him to tell the others?" Sam asked.

"Well, no, him and Emma were making out behind some Aruthor cut-out," Gibby explained.

"And you didn't stop them?" Freddie exclaimed. "Dang it Gib! Tell your son to keep his lips off my daughter's face for two seconds, will you?"

"Dude, they _are_ dating," Carly chuckled.

"So? That doesn't mean they have to kiss," Freddie mumbled.

"Freddie still likes to think that one day Emma and Ashton will decide to be nuns or something," Sam said, putting her arm around her husband. "Anyway, the kids have their passes, they'll just come in later. We need to get this thing on the road."

"You guys all ready?" their guide asked. "The fans are starting to get rowdy."

"Yeah, we're good to go," Carly said. She turned back to the others. "Remember. We're not turning this into another fan war."

"No worries, Carls, we know how to handle it this time," Freddie said.

"Webicon is proud to present the stars of everyone's favorite classical web show, iCarly!" they heard the guide announce up on the stage. "So put your hands together for Carly, Sam, Freddie and Gibby!"

The four heard cheers and applause, and they made their way out from behind the curtain.

"As always, we'll begin with a Q&A session," the guide said as the four adults took their seats. "So raise your hand and the iCarly cast will get to you as soon as possible!"

At once nearly every hand in the audience went up.

"Um, wow," Carly smiled, speaking into the microphone that they each had in front of them. "It's great to see even after all these years you guys are still so eager to hear from us! So, let's see…how about the girl in the pink shirt?"

"Hi Carly! Sam, Freddie, and Gibby!" the girl said, jumping to her feet. "I was so excited when I heard you were going to be here; I've missed iCarly so much."

"Well thanks," Freddie grinned. "So what's your question?"

"Well, I was wondering if you have ever considered starting the web show up again?"

Cheers of approval erupted, and it took a moment to calm everyone down.

"At least that was a semi-normal question," Sam whispered to Carly.

"So far so good," Carly whispered back.

"Well, we did have a lot of fun doing the show back when we were teenagers," Freddie told the girl. "And we do miss it. But we do sort of have new things going on in our lives now. I think we've all accepted that the iCarly chapter in our lives, though a happy one, is officially closed."

"But I still have my blog!" Gibby spoke up.

"Any more questions?" Carly asked. "Um, you there, in the blue dress."

"Yes, I have a question," the girl said, standing up. "What sort of things are you all up to now that iCarly's over?"

"Oh, well, Freddie's a developer for the Pear Company," Carly answered. "Sam and me both work at television writers, and Gibby…well, none of are really sure what Gibby does exactly."

"Maybe if you read my blog…" Gibby said.

"So you and Sam work together?" the girl asked.

"Yup," Carly nodded.

"Interesting…and do your teenage fights over Freddie sometimes resurface?"

"Um…no, because there _were _no fights," Sam said firmly.

"And we're actually going to refrain from talking about any of our relationships in general," Freddie said. "So, who else has a question? Um, glasses, in the front."

"Freddie," the boy said. "I notice that your elbow and Carly's elbow are no more that three centimeters away from each other right now. From that evidence, you clearly can't deny that there is a relationship between you two."

"No!" Carly said as her and Freddie jerked their elbows away. "No relationships!"

"That's right, because Freddie's obviously more interested in Sam!" another fan said, holding up a large, purple Seddie sign. "Seddie all the way!"

"Yo! Enough with this relationship chiz!" Sam yelled into her mike.

"Carly and Freddie were meant to be together!" a girl in the back yelled, holding up a Creddie poster. "Creddie! Creddie! Creddie!"

"Listen, you guys, we're not-" Carly began, but she was cut off as half the room joined in with the girl's chant.

"I thought this wasn't supposed to happen this time!" Sam hissed to Carly.

"Well what do I know?" Carly snapped. "These people are just as whako as last time!"

"So what do we do?" Freddie asked as the other half of the room began chanting "Seddie! Seddie! Seddie!"

"We have to try and calm them down again," Carly said desperately.

"Yeah like that'll work," Sam snapped.

"Well can't Freddie just say that he married Sam?" Gibby whispered.  
"That wouldn't end this, Gib, that would just make everything worse," Carly sighed.

"Yeah, the best thing to do here is for us to just keep remaining neutral on this whole relationship thing," Freddie nodded.

"Okay, well you guys can handle this," Sam said. "I'm gonna run and get another Fat Shake."

"No!" Carly and Freddie both shouted.

"Fine, I'll stay," Sam mumbled.

…

"This place is so boring," Emma moaned as her and the other kids headed towards the room where the iCarly session was being held.

"How would you know? All you've done today is make out with Quincy!" Ashton pointed out.

"What?" Jason frowned, glaring at his younger sister's boyfriend.

"Um, she-she's lying," Quincy said quickly.

"Well this place is filled with losers," Emma said. "I _love _the Internet, but this place is making it seem like the entire Internet population is losers and geeks."

"But we can see our parents now," Clarissa pointed out as they reached the room. "Aren't you guys all just a little excited to see them talk about iCarly? Especially if it was as popular as they say."

"Don't you think that they were exaggerating about that just a little?" Ashton said. "I mean, I'm sure the show was cool and all, but still."

"Hey, why is there a bunch of screaming going on in there?" Tyler asked, listening at the door.

"No clue," Jason frowned. "Come on, let's go in and find out."

"Finally, a little excitement," Emma said as the kids all entered.

It was more than a little excitement, for when they entered, all the fans were on their feet, yelling at each other, waving their Seddie or Creddie posters in the air as they chanted.

"Whoa! What's going on?" Clarissa exclaimed.

"It's like some big nerd riot!" Quincy said.

"Look, there's mom and dad," Tyler said, spotting his parents, who were apparently trying to calm things down, but could scarcely be hear, even on their microphones.

"Hey, what's Seddie and Creddie?" Emma asked, reading the sign.

"Well, gee, Emma, maybe if you look at the _pictures _underneath the words, you could figure it out," Ashton said, rolling her eyes. "Look, the Creddie signs have pictures of Clarissa's mom and our dad, and the Seddie signs have pictures of mom and dad. They're obviously those little couple names that people come up with, you know, like what they do for celeberties."

"Well how come all these people want to see my mom and your dad together?" Clarissa asked.

"Yeah, don't they know that your parents are sort of _married_?" Quincy asked.

"You know what? I think this is what our parents were talking about earlier," Jason said. "You know, about the big thing that happened last time they came here before we were born? Look, mom's name plate says Sam Puckett instead of Benson. They must've not wanted to tell these nut jobs that mom and dad really are married."

"Oh, and they didn't want to tell us because it's sort of weird," Clarissa nodded. "I see…"

"I've got to hand it to them, though," Ashton said, somewhat impressed. "If all these people are still fighting over who dad should date after all these years, their web show must've been _really _popular."

"So…what do we do?" Quincy asked.

"I dunno, this is sort of fun to watch," Emma grinned.

"You just like anything where people fight," Ashton said.

"Um, duh," Emma nodded.

….

"Okay, we need another flare gun in here or something," Carly cried, ducking as a chair was thrown on stage.

"Yeah, no chiz!" Sam exclaimed.

"Hey, look! The kids are finally here!" Gibby said, spotting the kids in the audience.

"Oh great, looks like we get to have a nice, fun conversation about this whole thing with them on the way home," Freddie groaned.

"Hey! Hey!" someone from the crowd shouted, and everyone finally fell silent. It took Sam, Freddie, Carly and Gibby a moment that the reason everyone had fallen silent was because they were all staring at the kids.

"Newcomers!" a man shouted. "You must state your ship if you want to enter!"

"Um, we-we don't really know what you guys are-" Clarissa began.

"If you have no ship!" a woman said, grabbing Emma's arm. "Then you must-ow!"

Emma had shoved the lady off. "Get your nerdy hands off me!" she snapped.

"Okay, okay!" Carly said loudly. "This has gone on for long enough!"

"Yeah, those are our kids!" Gibby said. "And since half of them are Sam and Freddie's kids, I'd assume they'd ship Seddie."

Everyone gasped.

"Gibby!" Sam exclaimed. "You weren't supposed to mention anything about relationships!"

"I didn't!" Gibby defended. "I just told them you and Sam had four children together!"

"Unbelievable," Freddie said, shaking his head at Gibby.

"The spawn of Seddie is among us!" a Seddie shipper yelled excitedly.

"Did they just call us the spawn of Seddie?" Ashton frowned. "Gross."

"Hey!" Carly yelled, quieting everyone down. "Okay…now that Gibby had to go and ruin everything…It's true. Those are our kids. Those three over there are Gibby's kids, Quincy, Huey and Kirby, that's my daughter, Clarissa, with the dark hair, and those four are Sam and Freddie's kids. Jason, Emma, Ashton and Tyler."

"Yeah," Freddie sighed. "Me and Carly never had any relationship. Sam and me…well, we love each other. We've been married for close to twenty years and we have four kids together."

"So there's no Creddie!" a Seddie fan said happily.

"That's not true!" A Creddie shipper yelled back. "Look at Carly's daughter! She has Freddie's eyes!"  
"What? No she doesn't!" Sam said.

"Yeah! They're brown!"

"My eyes are brown, you loony!" Carly cried.

"She's not denying it!"

"No!" Freddie said firmly. "The only kids that I have are the ones I have with Sam."

"Yeah," Gibby nodded. "Their daughter, Emma, is even dating my son, Quincy."

There was another round of gasps.

"Uh-oh," Sam whispered.

"This can't be good," Carly mumbled.

"It's a new ship!" someone in the audience yelled. "We shall call it Quemma!"

"No way! Gibby's son should totally be dating Carly's daughter. Quilrissa! Quilrissa!"

"Oh my God, Gibby!" Freddie said as the fans began to argue again. "Do you realize what you've done?"

"No? What?" Gibby frowned.

"You started a new fan war!" Carly exclaimed.

"Really? Awesome!"

"Gibby!"

"Well, at least they're not freaking out over us anymore," Sam shrugged.

"We'd better get the kids and get out of here," Freddie said.

"Yeah, you're right," Carly nodded. "Before they get trampled by the fans…"


	294. Chapter 294

**AN-This oneshot takes place after iStill Psycho!**

_Care_

"You spending the night here?" Carly yawned as her and Sam climbed up to her room.

"Well I think all of my pajamas are around here, so I might as well," Sam shrugged as the girls entered Carly's room.

"Cool," Carly nodded, tossing down her bag. "Man, I can't believe we finally escaped from that psycho family! I was getting pretty scared there. I never thought I would be that happy to see Mrs. Benson in my life!"

"Yeah, she was a real hero," Sam mumbled, grabbing some pillows so she could make herself a bed on the love seat.

"And, at least things are good between her and T-Bo now," Carly said. She sat down on her bed. "Hey, you know what? I'm actually sort of hungry…I haven't had anything to eat since that weird Norwegian food. You up for some late-night Chinese?"

"Um, no, I'm good," Sam said, settling down onto her self-made bed.

"Did you just refuse food?" Carly frowned, walking over to her best friend. "That _I'm _paying for? What's wrong?"

"Why do you think something's wrong just because I don't want food right now?" Sam asked, somewhat defensively.

"Because you're Sam Puckett!" Carly said. "Now talk, what's bugging you?"

"Just go order your Chinese food," Sam mumbled.

"No, not until you tell me what's going on," Carly said, sitting down next to Sam.

Sam sighed. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course," Carly nodded.

"Okay…ever since I broke up with Freddie…do you think I've been any, you know, _nicer _to him?"

"What do you mean?" Carly frowned.

"Have I been any nicer to him?" Sam repeated. "You know, less aggressive?"

"Well…I haven't really noticed," Carly said. "I mean…I _guess _maybe you've stopped hitting him for no good reason…and you don't verbally harass him at every chance you get. Wait a minute…you _have _been nicer to him. Why?"

"Just drop it, okay," Sam said. "You gave me the answer, now let's just be done."

"What? No! Sam, you can't ask me something like that and then just drop the subject!" Carly exclaimed. "Now will you tell me why you've been being nicer to Freddie? I mean, it sort of seems like-Oh. S-Sam? You-You don't, you know, have feelings for Freddie again, do you?"

Sam didn't reply.

"Oh my God! You do!"

"Could you not scream it for the whole world to hear?" Sam hissed.

"So it's true then?" Carly asked.

"Well…lately its been harder for me to, you know, not miss going out with him," Sam admitted.

"How-How long have you felt like this?" Carly asked gently.

"I dunno," Sam said heavily. "Right after the break-up, I guess I thought that _those _feelings would just sort of go away. But they didn't…not really."

"So you've felt like this ever since you broke up with Freddie?" Carly said.

Sam nodded. "But before it was easier to hide. But lately…lately I just want to…you know."

"Kiss him? Just like you used to?" Carly finished knowingly.

"Yeah, that," Sam sighed.

"Okay, well, Sam, don't take this the wrong way," Carly said. "But-But if you've felt like this ever since you broke up with Freddie…why _did _you break up with him?"

Sam looked down at her lap. "Don't hate me, okay, but…about that…I sort of lied to you."

"What?"

"I didn't break up with Freddie," Sam sighed. "It was mutual."

"Mutual?" Carly repeated.

"Yes! I never crushed his nerdy little heart like I told you," Sam said. "He-He wanted to break up too."

"Freddie never said anything about that though," Carly pointed out.

"Yeah, I know, I made him promise that the real break-up story would stay between us only," Sam explained.

"Well-Well if it was completely mutual, maybe Freddie's feeling the same way as you right now!" Carly said. "Sam, you need to tell him how you feel and-"

Sam scoffed. "Carly, come on. You heard what Freddie said today…he _obviously _doesn't feel the same way."

"What'd he say?" Carly asked. "Sure, I guess he was kind of upset when we didn't save him from Nora's little kissing attack, but that was just as much my fault as yours, so-"

"No, when we were about to short out his tracker chip in his head with that shock pen," Sam said. "Remember? I was about to do it, but then he said no. That he wanted you to do it because you-you care about him."

"Well…he-he didn't mean-"

"Carly, face it, I blew my chance with Freddie," Sam said softly, resting her chin on her knees. "He's over me…"

"Oh, Sam," Carly said, hugging the blonde. "I know this is hard for you, but-"

"I just thought that maybe he actually meant what he said that night," Sam whispered. "When we broke up…"

"What'd he say?" Carly asked.

"He said he loved me," Sam replied.

Carly blinked. "Whoa. What did you say back?"

"I told him I loved him too…" Sam said. "But-But if Freddie doesn't even think that I care about him…If he doesn't think that I really meant it when I said I loved him, then he probably didn't mean it either when he said to me."

"Sam, that's not true," Carly said. "Freddie was just-he was just on edge because we had been trapped in Nora's house. He didn't mean it when he said that."

"You're my best friend, Carly, I know you're supposed to be saying all that," Sam said, showing a small, quivering smile. "But…don't worry about it, okay? I'll be okay." But as she said those words, Sam broke down, and tears began falling from her eyes. Carly hugged her best friend tighter.


	295. Chapter 295

_Ease_

"I know! You can put it in the cake!"

"What?" Freddie frowned, adjusting his tie.

"You know," Spencer explained. "Go talk to the chefs at the restaurant and get them to put the ring in the cake for desert, and when Sam takes a bite of it, she'll find and then you propose! It's brilliant, she'll love it!"

"Or she'll gulp down the cake so fast that she'll choke on the ring!" Freddie pointed out.

"Well!" Spencer said indignantly. "That's the ninth idea of mine that you rejected."

"I'm sorry, it's just…this has to be perfect, okay?" Freddie sighed. "It's not like I'm asking Sam about the weather here, I'm asking her to _marry _me. I can't screw this up. And now I have-" he looked at his watch. "Three hours before I'm supposed to pick Sam up and I still have no idea of how I'm going to do this!"

"Okay, calm down," Spencer said. "I know this isn't easy-"

"I will not calm down!" Freddie exclaimed. "How do you expect me to be calm when I'm about to go and ask my girlfriend the most important question of our lives?"

"Look, I know you're nervous, Freddie," Spencer said. "But it will be fine. Sam and you are in love, you've been dating for almost three years…you've got this. Even if you propose to her in the stupidest way possible, she's not going to care. All she's going to care about is getting to marry you."

"But what if she says no?" Freddie asked.

"Dude, you're being ridiculous," Spencer said. "Sam's not going to say no. Didn't you hear what I just said? She _loves _you."

"Yeah, but-"

"Every guy feels like this when they're about to propose," Spencer said. "It's natural. But just remember, you'll be fine."

Freddie smiled. "Thanks, Spence."

…

"Freddie?" Sam frowned as she opened up the door of the apartment her and Carly shared. "What are you doing here? I thought you weren't coming by to pick me up for our date until seven. I'm not-"

But he cut her off by kissing her passionately on the lips.

"Um, hi!" Carly said after nearly two minutes.

"Hey Carls," Freddie said, breathless, as he pulled away from his girlfriend. He handed her a bouquet of red roses. "These are for you."

"Thanks," Sam smiled. "But baby, why are you so early? I'm nowhere near ready." She pulled at her ratty old tank top and sweatpants. "As you can tell."

"I think you look beautiful," Freddie told her. "And I canceled our dinner reservations on my way over here and called in for an extra-large meat supreme pizza. I thought we could just sort of hang out here together. You know, eat pizza, watch lame movies on Getflix…have a chill date night."

"Wait? So I don't get to do her hair and make-up?" Carly asked, somewhat disappointed.

"Hey, I'm down for that," Sam grinned. "But, um," she lowered her voice. "Carly's gonna be here all night, just so you know, so we won't really be able to-"

But just then Carly's phone rang.

"Hello? Spencer?" she answered. "You got your foot stuck in what? Again? Ugh, I'm on my way."

"What's wrong with Spencer?" Sam asked.

"He was trying to install this thing in his toilet that plays music every time a person sits down," Carly sighed, grabbing her bag. "And then one thing led to another…and well, let's just say he's stuck in a very awkward position right now."

"Ah, well good luck," Sam laughed.

"Now then," Freddie said as Carly hurried out of the apartment. "You were saying?"

…

"Man, I am stuffed," Sam said, resting her head on Freddie's shoulder. In addition to the pizza, Freddie had also ordered wings, and now Sam had wing sauce smeared all over her mouth. "And that almost never happens."

Freddie chuckled. "You have a little something on your mouth."

"Oh, do I?" Sam smirked, raising an eyebrow suggestively. "What you gonna do about it, Benson?"

Freddie leaned down, capturing her lips for probably the fifteenth time in the last half-hour.

"You know," Sam sighed, cuddling up next to her boyfriend underneath the blanket they were cloaked under as they watched reruns of old ninety television shows. "This was a lot better than going out to some restaurant. I mean, I don't have to dress up, you didn't have to argue with the waiter about the proper way to pronounce lasagna-"

"The 'g' is silent!"

"I know, baby," Sam said. She picked up the remote and turned off the T.V. "So. What should we do for the rest of the night?"

"Well…you remember that game you used always love to play when we were younger?" Freddie asked. "Embarrassing Exhibition?"

"Oh yeah!" Sam nodded. "Where you have to try and get one of the players to be humiliated by the end of the game! Didn't I make you cry once during this game?"

"No," Freddie said quickly.

"Yeah I did," Sam grinned.

"I was thirteen!" Freddie defended. "Anyway…go look in that bag over by the front door by my jacket."

"Okay," Sam said, giving Freddie a strange look. She went over to the door and looked in the bag that she hadn't even noticed before. "Hey!" she exclaimed, pulling out a box. "You brought the game!"

"Yup, wanna play?" Freddie asked.

"Hmm, I guess I can go for some humiliation," Sam said. "And when I say humiliation, I mean from you."

"Ha, ha," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. He pushed away the pizza box that was sitting on the coffee table by the couch. "Come on, let's set it up here."

"Alright," Sam said, taking her seat as she opened the box. "So, if I remember right, we have to try and make it around this board while the other players ask us embarrassing questions. The first one to make it all the way around without quitting from shame wins. Oh, and we each get a stack of these cards with the embarrassing questions on them. Here's your pile-"

"No, um, you take that pile," Freddie said quickly.

"Well why does it matter which-"

"Okay let's play!" Freddie said loudly, switching the piles of cards and quickly grabbing the dice and putting them in Sam's hands. "You can go first."

"Alright," Sam shrugged, rolling the dice. She moved her player and then picked up a card from her pile. "Alright, Fredgut, and remember, you have to be completely honest. When was the last time you wore underwear that your mom bought you."

"Okay, well, first let me just say that my mom is getting a little better about that type of thing, and-"

"Answer the question," Sam smirked.

"Today," Freddie mumbled as Sam laughed. "But it's not my fault! You know she sneaks into my place and replaces any pair that _I _buy with those hypoallergenic kind."

"It's still funny," Sam said.

"Yeah, well, now it's my turn," Freddie said, taking the dice

The two continued to play the game for an hour, their decks of cards each getting smaller as the game went on until finally Sam only had one left.

"Last one," Sam said, rolling the dice. "And if you're too humiliated to answer it, then I win, as usual." She picked up her card. "And the game determining question," she announced dramatically. "Is…Sam, will you marry me?" She looked up at Freddie. "Um…that-that doesn't sound like one of the cards from this game," she said softly, her eyes wide with surprise.

"No," Freddie agreed, reaching into his pocket. "I made that one special for tonight." He pulled out a small box and opened it, revealing a sparkling engagement ring, and then got down on one knee. "Sam…you have no idea how long I spent trying to figure out the perfect way to ask you this. I wanted it to be special, something we'd remember for the rest of our lives. I was going to ask you this at some fancy dinner, after we ate our tiny portions of food we couldn't even pronounce, but then I realized, I wanted you to be as perfectly you as possible when I asked. I didn't want to ask you this when you were eating weird, fancy food that would never fill you up while you wore some dress that, although I'm sure you'd look hot in, was making you feel so uncomfortable, sitting around some place where we have to be proper. I wanted to ask you when you were the most comfortable, laughing, having fun…Sam, I love you. More than I ever thought I'd love anyone. And everyone always says that during a relationship, that spark that you feel at the beginning will eventually fade, but for me, it has stayed throughout all these years, and there's no doubt in my mind that it will stay there forever. I want to spend our lives together, start a family together, and grow old together. So, Samantha Joy Puckett? Will you marry me?"

Sam broke into the widest smile Freddie had ever seen. "Oh my God…I can't believe-Yes! Yes, I'll marry you!"

Freddie felt a wave of euphoria sweep over him as he slid the ring onto Sam's finger before kissing her deeply.

"Wow…we-we're engaged!" Sam said, still grinning, when they broke apart, looking down at the ring on her finger. "Baby…this was…this was perfect."


	296. Chapter 296

**AN-Hey! One day until Sam and Cat, I'm so excited! By the way, if you haven't heard, you can actually go to iTunes and download the first six minutes of it for free!**

…

_Monster_

"Wow, so your dad's really a landscaper?" Carly said. "That must be so cool."

"It is pretty interesting," the pretty, tall, dark-haired girl nodded.

"Yeah, doesn't Katie's family sound amazing?" Freddie said, putting his arm around his new girlfriend's shoulder. "It's not hard to see why she came out so amazing as well."

"Aw, sweetie!" Katie squealed.

"Yes, that was…adorable," Carly said, feeling awkward as the new couple exchanged a kiss in front of her.

"Hey! Whoa, who's this?" Spencer asked, coming into the apartment.

"This is Katie, my new girlfriend," Freddie introduced. "Katie, this is Carly's brother, Spencer."

"Oh yeah, Freddie told me about you last night," Spencer said, shaking the girls hand.

"Hi! I just _love _your apartment!" Katie said brightly. "All your sculptures are just so beautiful and life like! You are _such _a brilliant artist."

"Well…thanks," Spencer said, feeling a bit overwhelmed by the sea of compliments that was just hurled at him. "So, how long have you and Freddie been dating?"

"Two magical weeks," Katie replied.

"Yup," Freddie said happily. "We met down at the comic book shop."

"You like comics?" Spencer frowned.

"She wasn't in there buying any comics," Freddie explained.

"I found a wallet outside the store," Katie told him. "And I went inside to turn it into the manager so whoever lost it could have it returned to them."

"Isn't she just the nicest person you ever met?" Freddie grinned.

"Uh-huh," Carly said politely, trying not to feel nauseous from the amount of peppiness this girl was bringing to the atmosphere. "So, you two have any coupley plans for tonight?"

"I wish," Freddie sighed. "But my mom's making me go to this seminar with her on the dangers of open-toed shoes."

"Oh, make sure you tell your mom I said hi," Katie said. "She's such a sweet woman."

Spencer nearly choked on the juice he had just begun to sip.

"Thanks," Freddie said. "But I'm just sorry you're going to have to spend the night by yourself. I know you don't know too many people in Seattle yet. Hey! Maybe you can go and do something with Carly?"

"Oh!" Carly said, caught off guard. "Well…I-I don't see why not, um…I-I-"

"Aw, it's sweet of you to offer, Carly," Katie said, giving Carly a hug. "But I actually just found out that an old friend of mine lives right here in Seattle! I think I'm going to stop by her place and catch up!"

"Oh, well that's perfect then!" Freddie said.

"Did you just move to Seattle?" Spencer asked.

"Yup, from Texas," Katie answered. "I used to go to a boarding school there. But then my dad got transferred here a couple of weeks ago, and he found out about that Briarwood Prep school, and he asked me if I'd like to go there so I could be close to my family, and I thought it sounded like a great idea!"

"She got into Briarwood on a full scholarship," Freddie said. "She's really smart."

"Oh, everyone's smart in their own special way, Freddie!" Katie chuckled. She looked down at her Pear phone. "Whoa, it's already four o'clock. I need to run home and call the animal shelter and see if I can set up a volunteering schedule with them!"

"Okay, I'll walk you down," Freddie said. "We'll see you guys later.

"Yes! It was so nice meeting both of you!" Katie called as her and Freddie headed out of the Shay's apartment.

"Wow!" Spencer said as the door closed.

"I know, she's a little…_too _nice," Carly nodded.

"And she _likes _Mrs. Benson!" Spencer added.

"Yeah, that too," Carly laughed. "But I guess she's a sweet girl. I just met her today so I don't really know too much about her, other than what Freddie's told me."

"You just met her?" Spencer frowned. "But I thought Freddie said they've been dating for two weeks."

"Well, yeah," Carly said. "But he wanted to keep their relationship on the down low for the first couple of weeks. You know, to make sure things looked like they would work out. Oh, and well…he-he also hasn't brought her around because he-he sort of wants to wait on the whole introducing her to Sam thing."

"Wait, Sam doesn't know about her?" Spencer said.

"Oh she knows Freddie's been on a few dates with a girl," Carly said. "And well, I-I don't think she thinks it's anything serious yet. I guess Freddie just wants to hold off on that whole awkward introducing the current girlfriend to the ex-girlfriend moment."

"Smart man," Spencer nodded.

"I hope Sam will be okay once she does realize that Freddie seems to really like this girl, though," Carly sighed. "I know she tried to play it off when Freddie first told us that he met a girl, but I think she was kind of…upset about it."

"She still has feelings for Freddie?" Spencer asked.

"Well, I don't know if it's that," Carly said. "But she might just feel a little weird. I mean when that girl Veronica started going out with that cashier at the grocery store she worked at, you refused to even go there! We had to order take-out for a month!"

"Yeah, I guess it is always suckish when your ex finds someone else," Spencer said.

"Especially when you're still friends with them," Carly said. "But, you know what? Sam's tough. I'm sure she'll be fine."

…

Later that evening, Carly was sitting downstairs on her couch, flipping through the television channels, just about to give up on finding anything decent to watch and head to bed.

Suddenly the apartment door opened up and Sam walked in.

"Hey Carlotta," Sam said, grabbing the bowl of popcorn Carly had been eating from and plopping herself down next to her best friend.

"Sam? What are you doing here? It's eleven o'clock!" Carly said. "We have school tomorrow. I was just about to go to bed."

"Eh, I needed to get out of my house," Sam shrugged. "So what's up kid?"

"Nothing!" Carly said quickly.

Sam frowned. "Um…okay. Carly, you know you can't lie very well…"

"Alright," Carly sighed, turning off the T.V. "Look, I'm going to tell you this as gently as possible."

"What?" Sam asked, concerned. "You didn't-Oh man, please tell me you didn't finish those fancy truffles in your fridge!"

"No, no, those are still in there," Carly said. "But today after school…I-I met the girl Freddie's been seeing."

She stared at Sam, expecting for her to be at least a little upset at this news, but she just shrugged. "That's it?"

"Um, yeah," Carly nodded. "And Sam…They-They're pretty much official now. You know, boyfriend and girlfriend."

"Well, good luck to her then," Sam chuckled. "Having to deal with that nub all the time."

"Are you okay with this?" Carly frowned.

"Why wouldn't I be?" Sam said. "Oh come on, you didn't think I'd be jealous of them did you? Carly, Freddie and broke up _months _ago! It's totally cool if he wants to spread his nerdiness to other girls."

"Well, okay," Carly nodded. "But just so you know, Freddie texted me a few hours ago and said that he's going to bring her by rehearsal tomorrow after school, so you'll get to meet her then."

"Okay," Sam shrugged.

"Her name's Katie, by the way," Carly added.

Sam said nothing, and for a few moments, the two girls sat in silent.

"So, um, what-what's she like?" Sam asked.

Carly gave a small chuckle. "Honestly? She's sweet and all, but she's a little to nice."

"Really? That's coming from _you_?" Sam grinned.

"Please, she makes me look like some thug on the street," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "And get this. She actually _likes _Mrs. Benson."

"Get out!" Sam exclaimed.

"It's true," Carly said.

"Wow, this chick must be completely deranged," Sam said, shaking her head. "But then again, she'd have to be to be going out with Fredwad."

…

"Wow, this studio is so cool!" Katie said the next day as Carly put her hair in pigtails for the Idiot Farm Girl Bit that Freddie would be filming.

"Thanks," Carly replied. "It used to be a sort of storage unit that Spencer kept his old sculptures in before we started iCarly."

"I'm so excited to see your web show," Katie said happily.

"You've never seen it before?" Carly asked.

"Nah, this is going to be her first iCarly experience," Freddie said, adjusting the white balance on his camera.

"Oh…well yay!" Carly smiled.

"You have any idea where Sam is?" Freddie asked. "She was supposed to be here five minutes ago."

"Yo, I'm here!" Sam said, right on cue, as she ran into the studio. "We ready to do a little iCarly?"

"No way! Sam!" Katie exclaimed, running over to the blonde to hug her. "_You're _on iCarly too?"

"Um, yeah," Sam nodded. "What-What are you doing here?"

"You two _know _each other?" Freddie said, confused, looking back and forth between his girlfriend and ex-girlfriend.

"Yeah we do!" Katie squealed. "You remember yesterday when I said I was going to visit and old friend? Well it was Sam!"

"Yeah…it was me," Sam nodded, sounding much less enthusiastic about it, though.

"How do you two know each other?" Carly asked, just as confused as Freddie was.

"Well her sister was my roommate back at my boarding school," Katie explained.

"Oh, you know Melanie?" Carly nodded.

"Yeah, I met Katie the few times my mom and I went down to visit Melanie," Sam said.

"But-But Melanie doesn't exist," Freddie said weakly.

"What do you mean?" Katie said.

"Freddie, for the millionth time, she does too," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Wait…so you-you're really friends with Sam's sister, who really does exist?" Freddie said to Katie.

"Yes, isn't that neat?" Katie nodded.

"Yes…neat," Freddie said, a strange look still on his face. "Um, well…I'm gonna run back down to my place to grab my lens cleaner real quick and then we can start filming."

"Oh! Do you mind if I come with you honey?" Katie asked. "Those tofu squares your mom made yesterday were just so delicious. I want to ask her for her recipe."

"Sure come on," Freddie smiled.

"Okay, I cannot believe that Melanie's friends with Katie," Carly said once the two had left. "I mean, what are the odds?"

Sam scoffed. "Melanie's not friends with her."

"But Katie just said they were roommates back at boarding school," Carly pointed out.

"Yeah, they were roommates," Sam nodded. "But Melanie never really liked her too much."

"Really? Why not?" Carly questioned. "Did she do something?"

"No, Carly," Sam chuckled. "Nothing like that. Melanie just thought she was a little too…happy."

"_Melanie _thought she was too happy?" Carly grinned. "Melanie's happier than me!"

"I know," Sam nodded.

"And she thought you two were friends from just the few times you met her when you visited Melanie?" Carly asked.

"Yeah, I nearly had a heart attack when that chick showed up on my doorstep yesterday," Sam said. "That's why I came over here last night; she was starting to go on about a slumber party!"

"Oi."

"I know, that girl's something else," Sam said. She sat down in a beanbag chair, trying to act nonchalant. "But Freddie seems to really like her, though."

"I think they're still in their honeymoon phase," Carly said. "Hopefully in another week they'll tone down the cheeriness."

"Pfft, I doubt it," Sam said. "Melanie told me that Katie one time spent an entire _month _celebrating when her hamster gave birth."

"Um…yeah, then I think it's gonna take a little longer than a week to calm them down," Carly frowned.

…..

"Alright, that's three dozen cupcakes down," Carly said, setting the batch she had just taken out of the oven out and setting them down by a tub of icing. "Sam, you know you're supposed to be _helping _me bake these cupcakes for the school's bake sale."

"Um, why me?" Sam frowned, looking up from her Pear Pad.

"Because you're the one who got us roped into doing this!" Carly exclaimed. "You just had to crack Mrs. Briggs window. You're lucky Principal Franklin let us do this instead of that month-long detention Mrs. Briggs suggested!"

"I'll help you, Carly!" Katie said perkily, getting up from the couch where her and Freddie were sitting. "I love cupcakes! They're just so sweet and cute, aren't they?"

"Um, yeah…" Carly said, plastering a fake smile onto her face. "That's-That's nice of you to offer, Katie, but-"

Just then Carly's phone rang, and she answered it. "Hello? Oh! I completely forgot, sorry! I'll be there in a few!"

"Who was that?" Freddie asked.

"Spencer, I forgot that I was supposed to pick him up from his special doctors," Carly said, grabbing her jacket. "I'll be back in a little bit!"

"Hey," Freddie said as Carly left, looking at the tray of un-iced cupcakes sitting on the counter. "You know what game we haven't played in awhile?"

"Cupcake Slam?" Sam grinned knowingly, throwing down her Pear Pad. "Man, it's been years since we've played that. You up for a round?"

"Um, yeah!" Freddie nodded, grabbing three cupcakes from the tray. "Katie, come on! This is so much fun."

"Um, Cupcake Slam?" Katie frowned. "What's that?"

"Only the best game on the planet!" Sam said, taking a cupcake from Freddie and dunking it into the tub on frosting.

"You slam your cupcake onto a wall," Freddie explained. "And whoevers sticks the longest on there wins."

"And the one whose cupcake falls first has to do whatever the other two want," Sam added.

"It's really fun," Freddie said. "You ready to play?"

"But-But what about the cupcakes?" Kate whimpered.

"Um…what about them?" Freddie asked, confused.

"Well, how can you just slam those poor defenseless cupcakes into the wall like that, Freddie?" she asked.

"Well, um, Katie, it's not like the cupcakes are inedible afterwards," Freddie said. "Carly can still use them for the bake sale. They'll just need a new frosting job."

"But what about the cupcakes feelings?"

Sam, who didn't trust herself not to comment on this, quietly headed over to the fridge.

"Er…cupcakes feelings?" Freddie repeated. "Cupcakes don't have feelings."

Katie gasped. "Freddie! That-That's the meanest thing you've ever said to me!"

"I didn't mean-"

But Katie shook her head, her lip quivering. "Freddie, I'm sorry. But-But I don't think I can be involved with someone who can just carelessly ignore the feelings of something as sweet and innocent as a cupcake by slamming it onto a wall. I-I think we should end this…"

"Um…" Freddie frowned, clearly trying to make sense out of what was happening.

Katie walked over and gave him a peck on the cheek. "Goodbye, Freddie. I hope that one day you come to terms with your inner anger and work to _save_ cupcakes, not destroy them." And with that, she left, saying something about the rights of baked goods as she left.

"Did I-Did I just get dumped?" Freddie asked, turning to Sam, confused.

Sam, who had been watching the whole scene, struggling between the urge she had to both cheer and laugh, nodded. "Well…maybe you shouldn't have been such a monster to those poor, defenseless cupcakes."

"Sam…" Freddie sighed.

"I'm kidding," Sam said, walking over to him. "So, um…you-you okay?"

"Yeah," Freddie said, a surprised look coming onto his face. "I am, actually. Wow, I really don't feel all too down about this whole thing."

"Really? You dated her for a good three weeks," Sam pointed out.

"Yeah, I know, it's weird," Freddie said.

"Well, at least Katie finally came to her senses and realized how much of nubbish, geeky boyfriend you are," Sam smirked.

To her surprise, Freddie laughed. "I never thought I'd be so happy to hear an insult."

"Huh?" Sam frowned.

"While we were dating, the meanest thing Katie ever said to me was that tie was askew one night," Freddie said. "Being constantly complimented and gushed over by your girlfriend…not as fun as you might think. It's nice to have something to debate over once in awhile. I want someone who'd disagree with me every once in awhile."

"Yeah, sounds rough," Sam laughed.

"Well, hopefully this won't make it awkward with you to still be friends with her," Freddie sighed.

"Um, dude?" Sam scoffed. "I was never friends with her. She may have _thought _we were, just because she was Melanie's roommate."

"Oh, well…that's good then," Freddie said. He looked down at the cupcake in his hand. "So…are we still on for a little Cupcake Slam?"

"Shoosh yeah we are," Sam said.

"Okay, let me just run across the hall and tell my mom she doesn't need to make dinner for three for tonight anymore," Freddie said. "I have a feeling she's going to take this break-up worse than me."

"Tell your mom I said she was psychotic!" Sam called after him.

"No, Sam," Freddie said as he left.

Sam stood, alone, in the apartment, deep in her thoughts.

"I'd disagree with you every once in a while," Sam said softly to herself.


	297. Chapter 297

**AN-Fanfiction decided to not let me upload anything, yesterday, so sorry about that? What did you all think of Sam & Cat? I really liked it, and I think it's definitely going to turn out to be just as successful as iCarly and Victorious. **

…

_Spice_

"Hey, Sam?" Carly called, walking into the Benson's house. "I thought you were going to meet me at the mall a half-hour ago! You know I hate shopping alone!"

"Huh? Oh…sorry," Sam mumbled from her spot on the sofa. "I forgot…"

"What's up?" Carly frowned, sensing that something was wrong. "Is everything alright?"

Sam shook her head. "No."

"Well what is it?" Carly asked, concerned, sitting down next to her best friend.

Sam sighed. "Freddie's mom died."

Carly gasped. "What?"

"The hospital called a few hours ago," Sam told her heavily.

"What-what happened?" Carly whispered.

"She went into her doctor about this bad headache she'd apparently had for a few days," Sam said. "And, well, she-she never left."

"Oh my God," Carly said softly. "That's terrible!"

"Yeah, I know," Sam said, shaking her head.

"Sam? Where's Freddie?" Carly asked softly. "How is he?"

"He's at the hospital right now," Sam replied. "Doing paper work or something…I offered to go with him, but he said he just wanted to be alone for a little bit."

"Yeah, that's understandable," Carly said.

"I can't believe she's really gone," Sam said. "I mean, I know we never really got along and all, but it's still so…strange now."

"She loved you like a daughter," Carly told her. "Deep, _deep _down."

Sam showed a small smile.

"Have you told the kids yet?" Carly asked.

"Yup," Sam sighed. "They're all upstairs…this is the first major death we've had in the family. I think they're still kind of in shock. I'm gonna go up and check on them again in a little bit."

"I'll give you guys some privacy then," Carly nodded. "Do you think I should call Freddie tonight or wait until tomorrow?"

"It might be better to wait," Sam said.

"Okay," Carly said. "Let him know I'm really sorry, though."

"I will," Sam told her.

After Carly left, Sam went upstairs and had all four of her and Freddie's kids come into their bedroom.

"Okay, you guys," Sam said to them all. "How you doing?"

Tyler, who was only four years old, and didn't really understand what as going on, stared blankly up at her. Emma and Ashton looked as though they had been crying, and twelve-year old Jason gave a small shrug, and Sam noticed that his eyes were red and puffy.

"Come here," Sam said, pulling all of her kids into a hug. "I know you all miss your grandma a lot. That's okay."

"Is she really not going to come back?" Ashton asked weakly.

"No, baby, she's not," Said gently. "That's what happens when you get older…But you guys, I just wanted to let you know that daddy…daddy's going to be feeling very, _very _sad for awhile."  
"Why?" Tyler asked.

"Well because grandma was his mom," Sam explained.

"I miss grandma, mommy," Emma said sadly.

"I do too," Sam said, stroking her daughter's hair. "I do too."

….

Later that evening, Sam was laying in her and Freddie's bed, trying not to worry. It was past midnight, and Freddie still wasn't home, and he wasn't answering his phone.

Sam sighed. After the call had come in about his mother, Sam remembered Freddie standing still for a moment. Sam had put an arm around him, but he quickly shrugged it off and mumbled that he needed to get to the hospital…

Just then Sam heard the front door of the house open, and a few seconds later she heard footsteps coming upstairs.

"Oh, I-I thought you'd be asleep by now," Freddie said when he saw his wife, awake, on the bed. "You didn't need to wait up for me."

"I wanted to," Sam said softly, getting up and pulling him into an embrace. "Baby…come her. How-How are you doing?"

"I'm okay," Freddie sighed. He kicked off his shoes and pulled off his jeans, carelessly tossing them onto the floor instead of putting them into the hamper like he normally did. "I had a ton of paperwork to fill out at the hospital."

"Is that where you were this whole time?" Sam asked as Freddie pulled back the covers to his side of the bed.

"No…I went back to her apartment," he answered, not meeting Sam's eye as he climbed into bed. "Went through some things…I guess tomorrow I should call the funeral home and-"

"I'll do that," Sam quickly volunteered. "Don't worry about it."

"No, it's alright, I can handle it," Freddie told her. "And I need to make some phone calls too…Did you tell the kids yet?"

"Of course," Sam nodded. "Tyler doesn't really know what's going on…I'll sit down with him by himself tomorrow and talk to him again. Jason and the twins were crying all night, though."

Freddie didn't say anything.

"Baby," Sam said, putting her arms around her husband. "I know how hard this has to be for you. Just-Just let me handle the funeral arrangements and everything, okay? I think you should just focus on you and-"

"No, Sam, really, it's okay," Freddie told her. "I can plan my mom's-my mom's funeral. Besides, I'm gonna have to pack up her apartment too…"

"I'll help you," Sam told him firmly.

Freddie shook his head. "You wouldn't want to, Sam. It's just gonna be either throwing a bunch of old stuff out or moving it into storage. Don't worry about it."

"Freddie, you can't-" Sam started.

"I'm really tired," Freddie said, turning off the lamp at his bedside. "I think I just wanna get some sleep right now."

"Okay," Sam said. "But Freddie…you know I'm here for you, right?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "I know. Good night."

"Good night," Sam said softly as she watched her husband's eyes close.

…..

"Hey," Carly said four days later during the reception that was taking place at the Benson's house after Marissa's funeral. "This is a really nice reception. I'm sure Freddie's mom would've loved it."

"Thanks," Sam sighed.

"Where's Freddie?" Carly asked. "I barely saw him at the service."

"He's running around somewhere worrying about whether or not there's enough onion dip," Sam said. "I'm really worried about him, Carls."

"Why?"

"Because its been four days since his mom died!" Sam hissed. "And he hasn't really, you know, acted sad or anything."

"Are you serious?" Carly frowned.

"Yes," Sam nodded. "He's been going nuts trying to do _everything_. He cleaned out her entire apartment in one day, got all her affairs in order, refused to let anyone help him plan the funeral…"

"Wow…sounds like he's trying to keep busy," Carly commented.

"I know," Sam said heavily. She looked across the room and saw Freddie setting out more drinks.

"Hey, can you keep an eye on everything down here?" Sam asked Carly. "I'm gonna go talk to him."

"Sure," Carly agreed.

Sam slowly walked over to her husband and put a hand on his shoulder. "Hey," she said softly.

"Hey," he replied. "Do we have any more drinks in the kitchen? I think we're almost out in here."

"Carly will handle that," Sam told him. "Come up stairs with me for a second."

"But I need to go talk to the caterers about the-"

"It can wait," Sam said, taking his hand. Without another word, she led him upstairs to their bedroom, away from the crowd of people in their living room.

"Sam, I really need to get back down there," Freddie said. "There's still a lot-"

"Baby, I know what you're doing," Sam said as the couple sat down on their bed.

"What exactly is that?" Freddie asked, confused.

"You're trying to keep yourself so busy to try and keep your mind off of this whole thing," Sam said.

"That's ridiculous," Freddie said, a bit defensively.

"Freddie, it's okay, I get it," Sam said. "You're upset by-"

"No, you don't get! I'm _fine_!" Freddie snapped.

"Freddie! You haven't cried _once _since you found out she died!" Sam said.

"So what?"

"So? She was your _mom_!" Sam exclaimed.

"I know! And I've accepted that she's gone now!" Freddie said. "She wasn't exactly young, Sam! These things happen!"

"I know they do," Sam said. "But-But that doesn't mean you have to be okay with them."

Freddie didn't reply.

"You know," Sam said, squeezing his hand. "You're the one who always told me that it's not good to just keep all your feelings bottled up, that it's important to just let everything out sometimes."

Freddie remained silent.

"Your mom was a good woman, Freddie," Sam whispered. "I know that her and I…we were never had the _ideal _mother daughter-in-law relationship, but she was _such _a good mother to you. She kept you safe, and she dedicated her entire life to making sure you grew up well. And she did a _really _good job with that."

Freddie still didn't say anything, and continued to look down at the ground.

Sam showed a small smile. "Hey? You remember the time she totally interrupted that romantic night we were going to have for your birthday back when we first got married? I had gotten this really fancy, expensive wine and made your favorite dinner, and we were sitting on the couch, just about to head up here, when she burst in with her own birthday dinner for you."

"She didn't leave us until one that morning," Freddie said quietly. "She kept trying to shovel her homemade healthy dinner down our throats…"

"I never told her this, but that organic spice cake she made was actually delicious," Sam said.

"That's because she made a lot of her own spices," Freddie said. "So that they wouldn't be filled with-filled with-"

And then suddenly, four days worth of bottled up emotions erupted, and Freddie broke down.

"I don't want her to be gone, Sam," he sobbed as Sam put her arms around him. "But she is, and-and now I don't know what to do."

"That's okay," Sam said, rubbing his back, feeling his tears drop onto her neck. "It's going to get easier, okay? I promise. But right now you've got to let yourself feel sad. Don't worry about trying to get over it or being okay with it right now. She was your _mom_. You loved her so much, and she loved you."

"She loved you too," Freddie said shakily, taking the tissue that Sam handed him. "You know that? She told me…a-a couple of nights before she…she said I was glad that I had someone I loved so much to spend the rest of my life with."

"She really said that?" Sam asked softly.

Freddie nodded.

Sam smiled and kissed Freddie gently as fresh tears began to fall from both their eyes. "I loved her too."


	298. Chapter 298

**AN-This oneshot takes place right after Sam and Freddie got together in iLost My Mind. It was requested by iShipSeddie. Hope you like it!**

…**.**

_Bed_

"And goodnight!" Carly said into the camera.

"Alright, patients, it's curfew times!" one of the nurses announced to the room. "Everyone report back to your rooms!"

"Um, hey, you guys?" Carly said, hurrying over to her two friends, who were standing next to each other with happy, yet somewhat confused, looks on their faces. "I don't mean to intrude on your first few moments as a couple or anything, but we still don't have a way to get Sam out of this place! Spencer's disguise was the only plan we had."

"Aw man, I don't want to stay locked up in here for another night!" Sam moaned. "They only serve quesadillas on the weekends, tomorrow they go back to serving weird goo for food!"

"Hey, your mom's phone number's in your phone right?" Freddie asked Sam.

"Well yeah, but there's no way she can fly back from Tijuana tonight," Sam said.

"I know," Freddie replied. "But if one of the nurses _talks _to your mom and explains the situation, I'm sure that she'd give them permission to allow Spencer to sign you out of this place!"

"Okay, why didn't we think of this before we dressed Spencer up like a lady and put fake boobs on him?" Carly asked.

"I dunno, he seemed so willing," Freddie shrugged.

"Well, Sam, give me your phone," Carly said. "I'll call your mom while you go back to your room and pack up your stuff. The sooner we get you out of here, the better."

"I'll come with you," Freddie said to Sam.

"Um, okay," Sam nodded, giving a small smile.

"Text me when everything's all set," Freddie told Carly.

"I will," Carly nodded, hurrying off to her brother, who was by the nurse's station.

"My room's this way," Sam said to Freddie as the two started towards a narrow corridor.

Freddie nodded as he followed her.

They were silent as they walked through the mental hospital. Neither of them really seemed to know what to say to one another. Sure, Freddie may have just pulled the bravest move of his life so far by kissing Sam live on the web, but right now, he felt like a stranger in this new territory.

Sam wasn't feeling any more confident than he was either at the moment. She was still going over what had just happened a few short minutes ago…did that kiss mean that Freddie liked her? Were they _dating _now? She tried not to dwell on that idea, for over the years she had learned the dangers of getting her hopes up with things like this.

Sam stopped in front of her door and let them inside.

"I didn't bring that much," Sam mumbled, turning on the light. "Just some clothes…those stupid security guards confiscated all the bacon I brought with me."

"How come?" Freddie asked. "Bacon doesn't seem too harmful."

"I know, those jerks probably just wanted a snack," Sam said. She grabbed the duffle bag she had brought and began to shove her clothes in it.

Freddie walked over to the easel by the window and looked at the painting Sam had been working on.

"Is that a picture of a foot?" he asked, chuckling a little bit.

"I made it to go with my finger painting," Sam explained.

She was just about to zip up her bag when sat down on the bed, not being able to contain the question that she desperately wanted to know. The question that she had asked before, but somehow never got answer to.

"So now what?" she sighed, looking over at Freddie.

Freddie took a deep breath, sitting down next to Sam on the bed. "Honestly…I don't know."

"Oh…" Sam said, looking down at her lap.

"I just mean," Freddie said quickly. "That this is just really new to me, Sam. I mean if someone was to tell me five days ago that you'd kiss me at the lock-in and that I would reciprocate by kissing you live on iCarly…I would've thought they were crazy!"

"Yeah…I guess that's true," Sam said. "Believe it or not, I wasn't planning on kissing you out in the courtyard like that and running to hideout in here. I was hoping that if I kept trying to ignore those feelings I had for you that they would eventually go away. But then you came out there, talking all about how I _shouldn't _ignore those feelings, and I just sort of…lost it."

"Well I'm never going to take back what I said out there," Freddie told her. "About not being scared to take a chance…I don't want you to ever regret finally letting your walls down for once and letting your emotions show. And maybe next time you go and do something like that you won't feel inclined to commit yourself for it?"  
Sam gave a short laugh. "Maybe."

Another silence fell between the two.

"Sam," Freddie said gently, slowly inching his hand towards hers that was sitting on the edge of the bed. "I-I want to do this."

"Do what?" Sam asked.

"I want to give us a shot," Freddie said. "You and me. As a couple. I really think that there's something between us."

Sam looked down at their hands, which were almost touching. "You do?"

"I do," he nodded.

"Well how do you know?" Sam asked. "Look, Freddie…I don't want to feel like I forced you into this. I-I appreciate you not embarrassing me on the Internet and everything, but-but just because I kissed you doesn't mean that you have to, you know, feel the same way."

"Hey," Freddie said, looking right into her blue, captivating eyes. "I told you, after I kissed you, that I really meant it. And I do. Sam, if I didn't want to be here, if I didn't think that giving us a chance could be the start of something great, then I wouldn't have kissed you. I can't explain how I know there's something here…it's just one of those things that we're going to have to trust."

"Well…if we're gonna do this then," Sam said slowly. "You do realize you're signing up for a girlfriend who's going to still give you a hard time and stuff."

"And you realize you'd be with a boyfriend who's a little on the nerdy side?"  
"A _little_?" Sam laughed.

"So," Freddie said, placing his hand on top of Sam's. "We're doing this, right?"

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Hey, that's not how mama rolls. You have to ask the _right _way, Benson!"

"Okay, okay," Freddie grinned. He moved a bit closer to her, his hand still on hers. "Princess Puckett? Do you want to be my girlfriend?"

"Hmm, I'll have think about that one," Sam said.

"Sam!"

"Relax, I'm kidding," Sam said. She smiled at him. "Yes. I'll be your girlfriend."

"Well good," Freddie said. "Because I've been wanting to do _this _ever since we got in this room." He leaned in and kissed her for the second time that night, his one hand still holding hers, his other stroking her blonde curls.

Just then Freddie's phone buzzed, and the new couple pulled apart, somewhat reluctantly.

"That's Carly," Freddie said, reading his text message. "She says that we can go to the front desk now. Your move gave the hospital permission for Spencer to act as your temporary guardian. We should go, I guess, so we can get you home."

"Or," Sam said thoughtfully. "We could stay here for a few more minutes…"  
Freddie grinned. "I like the way you think."


	299. Chapter 299

**AN-Hey, so this chapter is a sequel to chapter 223, where Freddie gets put into mall jail for confronting a guy who was hitting on Sam. There's actually already a sequel for that chapter up (ch 241), but I didn't know whether the person who sent me the request didn't know that, or if they just wanted another one. So I decided to just put another one up. **

…**.**

_Finger_

"Well baby, I'd say today was just a _fabulous _day," Sam said brightly as her and Freddie returned home from the mall, where Sam had just gotten Freddie out of mall jail. "The birds are chirping, the grass is green…and someone's nubby little butt wound up in jail for the first time in his life."

"It wasn't jail, Sam," Freddie said bitterly, flinging himself down on the couch. "It was _mall _jail."

"Uh, the word _jail's _still there, Sassy," Sam smirked. "You know, I wonder what your _mother _would say if she found out her sweet little Freddikins wound up in jail for assaulting a cashier at the Pottery Barrel…"

"Are you threatening to tell my mom on me?"

"Oh relax, I wouldn't do that," Sam told him, rolling her eyes.

"Besides, I didn't assault the guy," Freddie mumbled. "I went to the Pottery Barrel just to tell him off for trying to hit on my wife. He's the one who shoved _me _first anyway!"

"I know," Sam grinned. "I still can't believe you actually went there, though. But then again, you _do _have jealousy problems…"

"Um, excuse me?" Freddie frowned. "_I _have jealousy problems?"

"Yeah, come on, Fredward, this isn't the first time you've overreacted to some dude hitting on me," Sam chuckled. "What about a couple of months ago when you sent some dude a virus because he told me I looked hot in my new jeans? Or when you managed to get that guy's car towed that ordered a love smoothie for me at the Groovy Smoothie?"

"I just think it's weird that you're pointing fingers in the jealousy department, since _you _get _way _more jealous than me," Freddie said.

"Pfft, please," Sam scoffed. "Name one time I've been jealous."

"Oh I can name several," Freddie smirked. "A couple of weeks ago at that Italian restaurant we went to…the waitress told me I had good teeth and you flung gum in her hair!"

"That gum _slipped _out of my mouth, and it just so happened to land in her stupid little pony tail!" Sam snapped.

"Yeah, okay," Freddie nodded. "But what about the time when you nearly made that chick at the DMV cry because she told me I looked good in my driver's license photo?"

"I didn't almost make her cry," Sam muttered. "She-She probably just had allergies."

"Or what about Carly's cousin that was here visiting her and Spencer asked me if I'd help her buy a new laptop? You somehow tricked her into getting on the wrong train to go back home and she wound up in Maine!"

"That wasn't-"

"Or what about the time when-"

"Okay! Okay!" Sam said gave in. "I get jealous sometimes! Jeesh!"

Freddie smiled and put his arm around her. "I guess maybe both of us have that problem…"

"Maybe," Sam sighed. "I guess this is what Carly means when she calls us a dysfunctional couple, huh?"

"Baby, I think she's referring to a _lot _of things when she says that," Freddie laughed. He kissed the top of her head. "And hey, we'll work out the jealousy thing…one day. But for now, any guy that tries to mess with _my _wife is going to have to deal with me."

Sam snickered.

"What? You don't think that's menacing?" Freddie frowned.

"No…" Sam said, trying to hold back another chuckle. "I think that sounds _very _menacing."


	300. Chapter 300

_Rope_

"Hey, hey!" Freddie said brightly, walking into the iCarly studio. "Who's ready to shoot a little-"

"I can't believe you, Sam!" Carly said loudly, glaring at the blonde, not even noticing that Freddie had entered.

"I can't believe _you_!" Sam snapped, not looking over at Freddie either. "Why do you always have to do this?"

"Because you always force me to!"

"Hey! Guys!" Freddie said, walking over to the girls. "What's going on here?"

"Carly's being a control freak, as usual," Sam said to her boyfriend, crossing her arms angrily.

"I don't _want _to be a control freak!" Carly retorted, crossing her arms as well. "But when you refuse to take _any _responsibility for _anything _I don't have much choice!"

"Alright, what happened?" Freddie asked.

"Carly went crazy on me because I forgot to pick up some of the props for the iCarly bits we were supposed to shoot today," Sam grumbled. "It's not even that big of a deal."

"It is too a big deal!" Carly exclaimed. "How are we supposed to tie Gibby to hobo if we don't have any rope? And how are we supposed to stuff socks with Jell-O if you didn't pick up the socks or the Jell-O?"

"So I forgot this one time!"

"It's every time!" Carly yelled. "I must've told you ten times at school today, 'Sam, don't forget to get the iCarly props'. I even gave you a pastel colored index card with the list of what you were supposed to get on them! But did you? Nooo! You spent two hours sampling deli meats!"

"So we can just shoot the stuff tomorrow!" Sam argued. "Learn to be a little flexible!"

"Are you calling me uptight?" Carly gasped.

"Yup," Sam said, satisfied.

"Well maybe _you _should be _more _uptight!" Carly snapped. "Because then maybe we'd actually manage to get stuff done!"

"Okay you guys," Freddie sighed. "I know you're both feeling mad, but-"

"Well see how much you get done without me," Sam said, ignoring Freddie. "I'm out of here!"

"Good!" Carly called after her. "And I'm gonna go be the responsible one, as _usual_, and get the props you were supposed to get!"

"And now I'm alone," Freddie frowned as both girls stormed out of the studio.

…..

"Stupid Carly, thinking she can just order me around," Sam muttered furiously, stabbing a can of ravioli open with a knife later that evening.

"Baby…I think you need to be away from sharp things right now," Freddie said, taking the knife from Sam.

"I mean, so I didn't pick up the props," Sam ranted on. "Big deal. I was _going _to. But then I saw that free sample sign at the deli…"

"Uh-huh," Freddie sighed. He had heard this story three times already this evening.

"And I _said _I was sorry I forgot," Sam continued. "But was that good enough for her? No! For pork's sake, you'd think I forgot to pick up her lifesaving medication or something! And we don't need to have those bits ready until the show in _four _days; we'd have plenty of time to do it tomorrow."

"Well…it _does _sort of help to have the clips done as early as possible," Freddie pointed out. "You know, so I can get them all cleaned up and edited."

"But-But still," Sam said, frowning a little. "Carly just completely exploded on me for this one little thing."

"Um…well, this isn't exactly the first time you forgot to pick up things for the show," Freddie sighed.

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Uh, whose side are you on?"

"I'm not taking sides," Freddie said quickly.

"Yeah? Because it sort of sounds like you're taking Carly's," Sam said.

"Look, I'm just saying…you _did _promise you'd pick up those props," Freddie said.

"You _are_ taking her side!" Sam exclaimed.

"Well Sam, baby, I-I just think that, you know, you kind of made a mistake, and-"

"Unbelievable!" Sam said, shaking her head.

"Oh come on, let's not do this," Freddie said.

"Do what? You're the one siding with Carly," Sam snapped.

"Well I just-"

"You know what?" Sam said angrily. "If you think Carly's so right, then why don't you go date _her_?"

"Okay, Sam. That's it," Freddie said assertively. "You're being ridiculous. You _know _that I don't want to date Carly. I want to date you. But you know what? Just because we're dating doesn't mean that I have to agree with you on every little thing? So you know what? Yeah, I think Carly's right here. You were supposed to pick up those props, Carly _reminded _you a million times, but you still didn't do it. I'd be frustrated too! So would you!"

Sam stared at Freddie for a moment. "Wow…" she said softly. "I-I've never seen you _actually _stand up like to anyone."

"I know," Freddie sighed. "And I'm sorry I went off like that, but-"

"Hey, don't apologize," Sam said, still staring at Freddie with a somewhat impressed look on her face. "I-I think I kind of like how feisty you can get…"

"Oh, well, you know…" Freddie said.

Sam looked down at her feet. "And you know, hearing it like that…I guess…I guess I kind of deserved Carly's reaction. I promised her I'd get the props."

Freddie put a comforting arm around Sam. "Hey, you know Carly was just upset today. She didn't actually _mean _what she said. I'm sure by now she's cooled off and would talk to you if you went over there."

"You think?"

"I do," he nodded. "I mean you and Carly have fought before, but you're best friends; you always manage to fix it up in the end."

…..

Sam took a deep breath as she stood outside the Shay's apartment door as she knocked.

A moment later Carly answered the door. "Sam?" she frowned. "You _knocked_?"

"I didn't know if you'd like it if I just barged in right now," Sam said. "You know, after…Can I come in?"  
Carly nodded.

"Look," Sam sighed. "I'm sorry. I knew I was supposed to pick up all those props yesterday, and I didn't. There was no excuse."

"Yeah, well," Carly mumbled. "I guess I _did _come down a little hard on you. If we looked hard enough down in our storage until I'm sure we could've found stuff to use."

"No, no, this was my fault," Sam said, opening her backpack. She pulled out a rope, several envelopes of Jell-O and a bunch of socks. "But I went out and got everything today."

"Aw, you did!" Carly smiled. "Thanks, Sam!"

She pulled Sam into a hug.

"So…we cool?" Sam asked once they pulled apart.

"Yeah, we're cool," Carly grinned.

Just then there was a knock on the door and Freddie walked in. "Hey, everything…_happy, _in here?"

"Yeah, Sam and I aren't fighting anymore," Carly said.

"We have Fredbug to thank for that," Sam said. "He's the one who got me to realize that I was being kind of stupid about this whole thing."

"What do you mean?" Carly frowned.

"Well I just told her that you were right about her promising to get the props and that she should've been more responsible," Freddie said.

"You _what_?" Carly exclaimed. "You mean you took _my _side in this little fight?"

"But she was-"

"It doesn't matter _what_ Sam was doing," Carly said, crossing her arms, glaring at Freddie. "She is your _girlfriend. _I don't care if she was sitting up there pouring honey all over my hair; you take her side!"

"But I didn't-"

"Come on, Sam," Carly said, grabbing Sam's wrist as she began to lead them upstairs. "Let's go have a few words about this boyfriend of yours."

Sam laughed, turning back to Freddie as they headed upstairs. "Bye, baby."

"You know what?" Freddie said, shaking his head as he headed back across the hall. "I just can't win."


	301. Chapter 301

**AN-Just wanted to say thanks for all the support that you guys give to me and this story; 300 chapters later and it's still going strong; you guys are the best! Keep the requests coming!**

…

_Triangle_

"Okay, so hopefully Gibby's wounds will heal," Carly said brightly to the camera. "But until next time-"

"Just _please _don't try sneaking into any mime conventions," Sam said. "Those freaks are vicious!"

"Oh no, Sam," Carly said, gasping. "What's that I didn't hear downstairs?"

"I don't hear it too, Carls, the silence of a mime is near," Sam said. "One must be waiting downstairs!"

"Ahhhhh!" both girls screamed.

"And we're clear!" Freddie said, laughing. "Really funny stuff tonight."

"Thanks," Carly said. She looked at her Pearphone. "Whoa! We went five minutes over! You guys better get moving if you plan on making your dinner reservations."

"Oh, right," Sam said, tossing Freddie her blue remote. "The dress you're letting me borrow is in on your bed, right?"

"Yeah, and the shoes," Carly nodded. "Go snazz it up!"

"Man, I hope we can make it on time," Freddie said, grabbing a tie from his backpack and beginning to put it on.

"You guys will, don't worry," Carly assured him. "If anything, I'm sure you can convince Spencer to let you guys borrow his car he just bought from Socko's cousin, Otto. Hey, do you care if I go on your laptop and see how many people watched tonight? You know, since I don't have date to get ready for."

"Yeah, sure," Freddie said, sliding on his dress shoes as he ran a comb through his hair.

"No way!" Carly exclaimed, looking on Freddie's screen. "We got 1.5 _million _views tonight! That's the most we've ever gotten!"

"Nice," Freddie grinned, tucking in his shirt. "The show's really getting popular lately."

"Hey, you ready baby?" Sam asked, returning to the studio, dressed in a red strapless dress and black heels.

"Yup, and _wow_," Freddie said, staring at his girlfriend. "You look amazing, Sam."

"Yeah, I know," Sam smiled. She turned to Carly. "It's okay if I crash here after our date?"

"Sure," Carly nodded. "Anyway, have fun you two. I should probably go check on Gibby…"

….

"So then I realized that I could eat the ham _and _the roast beef when I used my new, comically big fork," Sam said as her and Freddie ate their rolls after giving their waiter their orders at the restaurant.

"Ah, so now I'm gonna have to buy you double the meat," Freddie grinned.

"Looks like it," Sam said as she buttered her bread.

"Hey," Freddie said, taking her hand under the table. "I'm really glad we finally managed to make time for this date. It's been way too long since we've done this."

"Yeah, tell me about it," Sam nodded. "We've been so busy with all this iCarly stuff lately. It's really exhausting."

"Guess that's the price we've got to pay for having one of the most popular web shows on the Internet. You know we reached 1.5 million views tonight?"

"Get out! You serious?" Sam exclaimed.

"Yup," Freddie said. "Carly's probably going to want to throw a party or something to celebrate this weekend, so we should-"

"Hi!" two girls said suddenly, walking up to the couple's table.

"Um, hello," Freddie frowned. "Can we help you?"

"You're from iCarly, right?" one of the girls asked.

"Oh, er, yeah," Sam nodded. "We are."

"Oh my God, we're like, _such _fans of your web show," the other girl squealed. "Could we have your autographs?"

Sam and Freddie looked at each other and shrugged.

"Yeah, okay," Freddie agreed.

"Why not?" Sam said.

"Thank you so much!" the girls said excitedly as Sam and Freddie each signed their notebooks.

"No problem," Freddie said politely.

"Wow, look at us," Sam said as the girls ran off. "Signing autographs and everything."

"It's pretty cool," Freddie smiled. "But right now, I don't want to think about anything else other than me and you. So anyway, yesterday when I was making these reservations, when I called up here, I got connected to-"

"Whoa! Look who it is!" a group of teens said, coming up to the table. "Sam and Freddie from iCarly!"

"You guys are hilarious!" one of the boys said.

"Yeah, I love that whole Idiot Farm Girl bit you guys do!" another said.

"Oh, well thanks," Freddie said. "But we're actually trying to-"

"Do you think we could get some pics?" one of the girls in the group asked hopefully.

Sam sighed. "Fine…go ahead."

"Awesome!" the girl grinned. She handed her phone to a passing by waiter, and after everybody got his or her chance to pose with the couple, Sam and Freddie were finally alone again.

"So like I was saying," Freddie said. "When I called here yesterday, they wound up connecting me to-"

"Holy peanut squash!" came a voice suddenly as an awkward looking teen boy came over to the table. "Sam Puckett and Freddie Benson? From the interweb? I surely must be dreaming."

Sam struggled to hold back a frustrated groan.

"Yeah, it-it's really nice to meet you and everything," Freddie said quickly. "But this really isn't the best time. You see, Sam and I are right in the middle-"

"Could you sign my homemade iCarly journal?" the boy asked, holding out a spiral with Carly, Sam, Freddie and Gibby's faces on it.

Freddie and Sam both looked a bit…creeped out by this notebook, but Freddie gave a sigh. "Well if you took all the time to actually make this…"

"This is the most exciting thing that's happened to me all week!" the boy said happily.

"Yeah, I bet," Sam mumbled, scribbling her name on the notebook. She handed it back to the him. "Here you go."

"I thank you most deeply," the teen said appreciatively. "And sweet, beautiful Samantha, with hair as golden as the sun, and beauty only comparable to that of the alien princess Gogthwatha, I must say, you are looking ravishing tonight. Perhaps if you're not busy next week, you'd like to accompany me to a soda bar for a some diet Peppy Cola."

"Hey!" Freddie snapped. "Are you _hitting _on Sam in front of me? Get out of here! She doesn't want to date you!"

"I'd like to here that from _her_," the boy snapped. He turned back to Sam. "So Sam? Would you like to meet me for a night of love and romance?"

"Sure," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I'll meet you in the Bermuda Triangle tomorrow night at eight."

"It's a date!" the boy said excitedly.

"Man, this is getting a little crazy," Freddie said to Sam as the teen ran off.

"I know," Sam nodded. "I guess this is the downside of iCarly being so popular…"

"Look, maybe we should try coming back here when there a little less people here," Freddie said.

"Yeah, that's probably smart," Sam sighed. "Too bad, though. I was sort of looking forward to tonight…"  
Freddie chuckled. "Hey. I didn't say anything about canceling our date night. What do you say we go down to that Chinese restaurant down the straight and go find a nice empty park to relax in?"

Sam smiled. "Well if there's gonna be Chinese food…and your lips, I'm in."


	302. Chapter 302

**AN-I think I've already done a few like this before, but I got a request for another one, so here you go **

…

_Teeth_

"Sam, I really think you put a little too much butter on this popcorn," Carly said, wiping off her butter-covered hand after she had grabbed a handful of popcorn from the bowl on Sam's lap.

"It needed flavor," Sam defended.

"You haven't even eaten any!" Carly said, rolling her eyes. "You've been to busy snacking on your boyfriend's lips over there!"

"Fine," Sam said, grabbing a large handful and stuffing it in her mouth. "There!"

"Very attractive, baby," Freddie laughed.

"Could you guys keep it down?" Gibby asked. "Some of us are _trying _to watch the movie here!"

"Sorry, Gib," Carly said. She frowned, looking over at the boy. "Um…are you flossing your teeth in my living room?"

"Well I've got kernels stuck in there!" Gibby said, continuing to floss his teeth.

"What goes on?" Spencer asked, coming into the apartment. "Whoa! Is that the movie where the robot goes to Pluto in search of the giant kangaroo?"

"Yeah, you wanna watch?" Carly asked her brother. "You know, if you don't mind sitting out here with Sam and Freddie, who can't seem to go five minutes without smooching their lips together!"

"What?" Sam said as her and Freddie broke apart.

"Nah, I've seen this movie at least a dozen times," Spencer said. "The kangaroo winds up falling in love with the robot and they live out the rest of their lives on Pluto."

"Dude!" Freddie exclaimed. "Way to ruin the ending!"

"Yeah! You-You ruiner!" Gibby snapped.

"Sorry! Sorry, I forgot you haven't seen it before!" Spencer said, running into his room to avoid the pillow Sam had just hurled at him.

"Well, no point in watching this now," Carly sighed, turning the television off. She looked at her Pearphone. "Besides, it's nearly one thirty, and I need to be up at nine for my pedicure appointment. You sure you don't want to come with me, Sam?"

"Quite," Sam nodded.

"Um, don't _I _get an invitation?" Gibby asked.

"_You _want to go for a pedicure?" Carly frowned.

"Yeah, I have this bunion thing that I want to get checked out, and-"

"Oops, they're all booked for tomorrow!" Carly said quickly.

"But you just asked Sam if-"

"Well, see you Gib, have a safe scooter ride home!" Carly said, opening the door for him.

"We should probably get to bed too," Freddie yawned. "I'm pretty tired."

"I hope you still have at least a _little _energy left," Sam grinned as her and Freddie got to her feet.

"Okay, let's not make my puke up my popcorn," Carly said. "I'll see you guys tomorrow."

"Bye, Carls," Sam said as she headed out the door with her boyfriend.

Carly quickly washed out the empty popcorn bowl and was about to head upstairs to bed when Spencer came running out of his room.

"Hey, is Sam still up?" he asked. "I just remembered I told Socko he could store a bunch of turkeys in our fridge tomorrow, and I forgot to make room for them. I need her to eat some of the leftovers."

"Sam left," Carly told him.

"She's not sleeping over here?" Spencer frowned.

"Nah, not tonight," Carly replied.

"She didn't walk home by herself though, at this hour, did she?" Spencer asked, concerned. "That's way too dangerous, even for her!"

"Don't worry," Carly said. "She's staying over at Freddie's."

"Mrs. Benson's allowing that?" Spencer asked.

"Nah, she's helping her sister, Susan, with a mole problem," Carly explained. "And T-Bo's visiting his sister in Canada."

"Ah," Spencer nodded. "Well then I'll just go over there then and ask her to come over and-"

"No!" Carly exclaimed quickly, running to the door to block her brother. "You can't go over there!"

"Sure I can," Spencer chuckled. "Besides, I'm not going to wake her up if I see her sleeping on Mrs. Benson's sofa bed out in the living room. I'll just leave and-"

"She…she won't be on the sofa bed," Carly said.

"Well why would she sleep on the floor when-"

"Aw, Spencer, come on! Please don't make me spell it out for you!" Carly moaned. "Can't you put two and two together? They've got the apartment to themselves…they're probably in the middle of certain…activities, right now."

"It's too late to be having a Pictionary tournament, silly," Spencer scoffed. "And I'm sure Sam's still up. Freddie probably had to make up her bed and-"

"For crying out loud, Spencer, they're both sleeping in Freddie's bed!" Carly snapped.

"What?!"

"Yes, and they're _definitely _not over there playing Pictionary," Carly said. "Look…it's a little uncomfortable for me to talk about; they're my best friends, and thinking of them over there doing…_that _is really icky. So can you just please give them there space, and try to forget that I ever said anything about it?"

"But-But-That's-I-No!" Spencer moaned. "Ah! I never, ever, ever, _ever_ wanted to hear anything about _that_!"

"So just never bring it up again!" Carly said. "That's what I plan on doing."

…

"Hey, Spencer," Freddie said brightly the next morning, letting himself into the Shay's apartment. "What's up? Carly still at her pedicure appointment?"

"Um, yeah," Spencer nodded.

"Ah," Freddie said, sitting down on the couch next to Spencer. "Well Sam's picking her mom up from her plastic surgeon, so you mind if I chill out over here for a little bit?"

"Actually, I sort of wanted to, um, _talk _with you," Spencer said, turning off the T.V.

"Okay," Freddie shrugged. "Wait…this isn't about that shopping trip to the mall last week? Because you swore you'd never bring that up again, and I-"

"No, it's not about that!" Spencer said quickly, shuddering at the memory. "It's about…guy things."

"Um, alright…I guess," Freddie frowned. "What's going on?"

"Alright, look, I don't-this isn't the funnest thing in the world for me to be bringing up, so just bear with me," Spencer said. "But the thing is…it has come to my attention that you and Sam are actively engaging in some…_activities_."

"Activities?" Freddie repeated. He gave Spencer a strange look. "Um…you-you don't mean-"

"Ah! Don't say it!" Spencer said, covering his ears. "But yes! Yes…_that_."

"Oh…" Freddie said awkwardly, looking down at his lap. "But-But how did you even _know _that we were-"

"Please, I happen to be _very _instinctive about these things," Spencer said. "But that's not the point!"

"Um, Spence, no offense or anything, but could we not do this?" Freddie pleaded. "Come on, this is so…awkward. Sam and I are dating, I love her, she loves me…this is kind of the thing that people do when they feel this way."

"Okay, okay, I get that," Spencer said. "But…I…you know Sam's like, practically my sister too. I just want to make sure that you guys were you know…being 'safe' and all that stuff…"

"Oh, well, um, we-we are," Freddie mumbled, blushing furiously.

"Okay…good," Spencer said, his face also etched in uncofortableness. "And-And you didn't 'pressure' her or anything? Because if you did, I-"

"Spencer! No! I didn't!" Freddie exclaimed. "It's something that both of us talked about and agreed that we wanted to, you know, do."

Spencer sighed. "Okay…just-just please make sure you guys are responsible…And let's never bring this up again."

"Yeah, no arguments there," Freddie said, breathing a sigh of relief. "But I will say that this was better than my mom's little 'birds and the bees' talk she gave me a few years ago…"


	303. Chapter 303

_Worm_

"So what's in this new flavor?" Sam asked as her, Freddie and Carly sipped their smoothies that T-Bo had just given them.

"Let's see, there's lemon juice, lime juice, strawberries, mangos…" T-Bo listed. "Oh yeah! And corn juice!"

"Corn juice?" Carly exclaimed gagging a bit. "Who puts corn juice in a smoothie?"

"Well I was taking to Spencer, and he said corn juice was terrible," T-Bo explained.

"And that made you want to put it in a smoothie?" Freddie frowned.

"Hey! If I'm the first dude to come up with an actual use for corn juice, I'll be rich!" T-Bo pointed out. "I'm also working on this new conditioner with corn juice. Any of you want to test it out? I'll give you four percent off your fifth bagel purchase."

"Why don't you just test your conditioner out on yourself?" Sam asked.

"Oh no, T-Bo don't mess around with his hair," T-Bo said firmly, flipping his long hair over his shoulder and heading back to the counter.

"Oh, hey, Fredwad, Pini's at seven this Friday?" Sam said to her boyfriend. "I'm in a lasagnay mood."

"Sure, I could do that," Freddie nodded.

"Well if you guys won't be all worn out from your date," Carly grinned. "You wanna go see that new movie with that hot guy from those car insurance commercials?"

"Shoosh yeah!" Sam said.

"That movie looks kind of…girlish," Freddie said. "So I think I'm gonna pass."

"Oh come on, Freddie, come with us," Sam said.

"But you and Carly are just going to sit there obsessing about the hot actor the whole time," Freddie moaned.

"Not the _whole _time," Carly said.

"Yeah, we're gonna have to take breaks to stuff our mouths with popcorn," Sam said. "Just come, baby. I mean what else do you have going on?"

"Fine," Freddie sighed. "I'll come…"

….

"Have I ever told you what a good kisser you were?" Freddie smiled the next morning as him and Sam had their usual pre-class make-out session by Freddie's locker.

"You're not too shabby yourself, Benson," Sam grinned.

"You know…you have the most beautiful eyes," Freddie said, kissing her gently again.

"You're such a chick," Sam laughed, trying to hide the blush that was creeping onto her cheeks.

"Yeah, yeah," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Oh, and you don't care if I hang out after school with some dudes from the AV club, do you? We're going to try and find a few more new clips from the new _Galaxy Wars_ movie."

"Wow…it's amazing that so much nerdiness can actually exist," Sam said, shaking her head. "But yeah, go ahead. I was gonna hang out with Carly at the mall anyway."

Just then the bell rang.

"Ugh, I need to get to class," Sam moaned. "Ms. Paulson said if I was late one more day this week she'd put me in lunch detention. I may be able to handle normal detention, but I _refuse _to miss my lunchtime."

"I'll see you later then," Freddie said, giving her one last kiss. "Bye, baby."

"Bye," Sam said, running off in the direction of her class.

Freddie turned to his locker and opened it up so he could quickly grab a book before heading off to class himself. Just as he was about to set off, though, he heard snickers behind him, and he turned around to see a group of guys smirking at him.

"Um…can I help you guys with something?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah, we were just wondering, Benson, if that hot little girlfriend of yours ever gets tired of hanging around with a girly boy," the biggest boy in the group said as the others all laughed loyally.

"Excuse me?" Freddie said. "Did you just call me a girly boy?"

"Yeah, he did, Benson," another boy said. "Anybody could see that you are. We heard you over here a few minutes ago… 'you have the most beautiful eyes'. Dude! You're a bigger chick than most of the girls on the cheerleading squad! Even your girlfriend said it to you!"

Freddie glared at the group while at the same time feeling deflated as he remembered that Sam did, in fact, just say that exact same thing to him.

"Yeah, she did say that," the first boy chuckled. "Right before she gave him her permission to stay after school!"

"She didn't give me permission!" Freddie snapped. "I just…I just asked for her okay…"

"Look at this guy," one of the other boys jeered. "Can't do anything without the girlfriend's approval…"

"Easy to see who wears the pants in that relationship," another boy laughed.

Freddie shoved past them, their laughs still echoing in their ears. He tried to tell himself that they were just jealous…he had himself a hot girlfriend while their longest relationships barely lasted a month put together. But somehow, he found himself dwelling on their words. Was he really acting like the girl in the relationship? He had never considered himself one who needed his 'men to be men and women to be women', but still, it was a definite blow to his self-esteem.

….

Later that evening, after Freddie had gotten home from his AV club meeting, Freddie found himself sitting alone on his couch, flipping through the few unlocked channels on his T.V. His mom was working still, and he was thankful for the space.

Just then, as he found a show on gardening techniques, he heard his front door open and Sam walked in.

"Hey," she said brightly, sitting down next to him, giving him a quick kiss. "How was your dorky little AV club meeting?"

"Good," Freddie mumbled.

Sam frowned. "You okay?"

"Yeah," Freddie said quickly.

"Well, Carly and Spencer want to know if we wanna go with them to Pink Bunny," Sam said. "So you up for it?"

"I dunno, why don't you give them the answer for us?" Freddie said bitterly. "After all, you're the decision maker in this relationship. You're the head honcho."

"What do you mean?" Sam asked.

"Never mind," Freddie sighed. "Let's just go to Pink Bunny…"

"No," Sam said. "Not until you tell me what's up."

"It's stupid," Freddie mumbled.

"I don't care, it's obviously bothering you," Sam said. "So just tell me."

"Fine," Freddie conceded. "I'm just…I'm sick of being the girlfriend here, okay!"

"What?" Sam laughed. "Baby, I may have gotten a C minus in biology, but I'm _pretty _sure _I'm _the girlfriend and _you're _the boyfriend here."

"That's not what I mean," Freddie moaned. "It's just…people think that I'm just the doormat in this relationship."

"What people?" Sam asked, crossing her arms.

"It's just something some guys said at school today," Freddie told her. "Mike Clifton and his buddies…"

"Those guys are worms," Sam said. "The longest they've had a girlfriend for is like, five days."

"I know, but they're not wrong, Sam," Freddie sighed. "I mean…I'm never the one who plans out our dates; you're the one who says where we're going. I'm the gushy romantic one, I'm the one who remembers all our little anniversaries like when we first kissed, when we first shared a smoothie together."

"But…I-I never knew that stuff bothered you," Sam said softly.

"It doesn't exactly bother me," Freddie admitted.

"Well then what's the problem?" Sam asked. "Look…I happen to _like _the fact that you're the romantic one, and that you always bring me flowers or write me little poems on those anniversary dates. I mean…maybe-maybe I am sort of bossy about always picking where we go on dates-"

"No, Sam," Freddie sighed. "I didn't mean to drag you into this. I don't care that you do that."

"Well then like I said, what's the problem?"

"It's just hard, you know, getting that sort of reputation," Freddie said, leaning back against the couch cushions.

Sam moved closer to him. "Baby," she said gently. "I've always thought you were the perfect boyfriend. Always. And I've never thought you were at all 'weak' or 'girly' or any of that stuff. I mean, when I say you act life my wife or you act like a chick, you've got to know that I'm just messing around."

"I know you are," Freddie told her. "But those other guys still think-"

"Who cares!" Sam exclaimed. "I just told you I _didn't _think that. And don't you think," she wrapped her arms around his neck, leaning in close to him. So close that he could already feel her breath on his mouth. "That my opinion counts for _just _a little more?"

"Absolutely," Freddie nodded, quickly closing the gap between their lips.

…..

"Those guys really told him that he acted like the chick in your relationship?" Carly frowned the next morning as her and Sam piled books into their locker.

"Yup," Sam sighed. "And you'd be proud of me, Carls. I was a _very _supportive girlfriend and comforted him and everything."

"Well good," Carly chuckled. "Besides, a lot of guys go through that awkward phase where they worry they're not macho enough. They can be so insecure sometimes. You and Freddie have a great relationship."

"Yeah," Sam nodded. She looked over her shoulder and saw that Freddie had just arrived at his locker. She also saw the group of guys approaching her boyfriend.

She rolled her eyes. "Hey, I'll be right back, Carls," she said.

She quickly headed over to Freddie and the others, just in time to hear Mike say to Freddie, "Hey, Benson? Did your girlfriend let you go skirt shopping with her yesterday?"

"Guys…knock it off," Freddie said, glaring at them. "You're not funny. You're being-"

"Hey, baby!" Sam said brightly in the peppiest voice she could muster up.

"Um, Sam?" Freddie said, looking a bit uncomfortable. "I-I think maybe you should-"

"I just wanted to say thanks again for letting me go with you to the gym last night," Sam said, smiling at him. "And letting me feel your biceps right after you finished benching all those weights. You think you wanna let me go with you again tonight?"

"Sam?" Freddie frowned. "What are you-"

Sam raised her eyebrow, as if to signal him to just play along.

"Whoa," Mike said. "You're telling me this guy actually works out?"

"Of course he does," Sam said. "What was it you were benching last night baby? 270?"

"270?" one of Mike's friends exclaimed. "That's better than you, Mike!"

"Shut up!" Mike snapped. "Let's just get out of here…I need to hit the weight room."

"Sam, what was that?" Freddie asked as the guys left the couple.

"That," Sam said. "Was me helping you out a little. I mean, I know you said you were fine with being the romantic one in our relationship and me being the aggressive one…but I figured it couldn't hurt to make those guys eat their words."

"Aw, thanks," Freddie said, laughing.

"Just don't get used to that," Sam warned him. "It was pretty hard not to gag during that whole little charade."

"I _do _go to the gym, Sam," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "That part wasn't a charade."

"Yeah, but like I'd gush over you the whole time like that," Sam scoffed. "Please. I'd never…no matter how hot you look when you come back…all covered in sweat."


	304. Chapter 304

_Water_

"Hey!" Carly said brightly, walking over to her and Sam's lockers.

"Oh, hey," Sam said, zipping up her backpack.

"What's up?" Carly asked. "I didn't see you all weekend. Spencer actually had a chance to eat the bacon he bought!"

"I was busy hanging out with Wendy," Sam explained. "There was photography convention in the park, so her and I decided to spray paint the lenses on some of the cameras there."

"What? Sam!"

"Calm down, it was washable paint…I think," Sam shrugged.

"Well, I have to tell you this funny story about what my granddad told Spencer on Saturday," Carly said. "So they were having their usual artist-lawyer fight, when Spencer says-"

"Hey, tell me at lunch, okay?" Sam said, swinging her bag over her shoulder. "Wendy and I were going to try and launch water balloons at the teachers as they come into school."

"Oh…well okay," Carly nodded. "See you in class then!"

"Later!" Sam said, hurrying off to soak some teachers.

Carly opened up her locker and began to reapply her lip-gloss when Freddie came over.

"Hey," he said.

"Hi," Carly greeted him.

"Have you seen Sam?"

"Her and Wendy are throwing water balloons at teachers," Carly replied simply.

"Ah," Freddie nodded. "She did mention that last night."

"You saw her this weekend? I thought she was busy with Wendy the whole time," Carly frowned.

"She was, but come on, Carls, you know our lips can't really manage to go a whole weekend without seeing each other," he grinned.

"I know," Carly said slowly. "But I just figured that since she didn't even have a chance to stop by and see _me_…but I guess you _are_ her boyfriend after all…"

"You okay?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah," Carly said quickly. "It's just, I dunno, it seems lately that Sam's spending a lot of time with Wendy, which is totally fine, but it just leaves me sort of…lonely. I mean this weekend I hung out with Spencer the whole time, until he had to leave for Socko's aunt's hearing, and I've been hanging out with Gibby after school for the past few days, but I don't think my blood pressure can handle doing _that _everyday."

"Hey, you're still Sam's best friend," Freddie assured her. "And you're good friends with Wendy. Why don't you guys hang out the three of you?"

"They haven't really exactly…invited me," Carly admitted. "Besides, they usually pull pranks and all that when they're together. Not exactly my thing, you know?"

"Well then there you go, I'm sure that's why they haven't invited you; because Sam knows you don't like doing that stuff," Freddie told her. "And look, even since Sam and I have started dating, she's really cut down on all those pranks and 'questionable' activities. But she's Sam, and I think she just really needed to get it out of her system. Once she gets her fix, she'll back to hanging out at your place 24/7, eating you and Spencer out of house and home."

Carly chuckled. "Yeah, I guess you're right. I'm glad she has _someone _to do her 'Sam' activities with at least. I just wish I had someone to do my 'Carly' things with while Sam's busy doing them. You know, like go to Build-A-Bra with me, go skirt shopping, discuss possible haircut styles…" she looked over at Freddie. "So…you busy after school?"

"Um…well I'm gonna be late for class!" Freddie said quickly, looking down at his bare wrist. "Bye Carls!"

…

"49, 50, 51," Sam said during the teens' web show, stuffing cotton balls into Gibby's mouth. "51! Gibby can fit 51 cotton balls into his mouth!"

"Uh-wa-po-ma!" Gibby said incoherently.

"Okay Gib, why don't you go spit up all that cotton!" Carly said, leading Gibby away from the camera's view. "So Sam and I can wrap it up here."

"Yeah, so until next time, make sure you floss never," Sam grinned.

"And be kind to _all _gummy bears," Carly said.

"And we're clear," Freddie said, turning off his camera. "Great show."

"Thanks, baby," Sam said, giving her boyfriend a quick kiss.

"Yeah, I think tonight was one of the best that we've done so far," Carly smiled. "So how about we order ourselves a little celebratory sushi?"

"Yeah, I'm down for that," Freddie nodded.

"Can't," Sam said, pulling out her phone. "Wendy's waiting for me down at the Groovy Smoothie."

"What are you two gonna do _this _time?" Freddie asked, rolling his eyes.

"Nothing illegal," Sam said. "We're just gonna grab some smoothies and then maybe head back to her place to try out this new nail kit her mom just bought her."

"Wait…so you're like, you know, just going to _hang out _tonight?" Carly frowned. "You're not tossing squirrels at bikers or making middle-aged men cry?"

"Nope," Sam replied, shaking her head. "We almost got caught by some cop yesterday when we were throwing pretzel sticks at joggers so we decided to take a break from that stuff for a little bit."

"Oh," Carly said. "Well…have fun then."

"Will do, kid," Sam said. She turned back to Freddie. "I'll swing by your place later, your mom's working tonight?"

"Yup," Freddie grinned, giving his girlfriend another kiss. "We have the place to ourselves until midnight."

"Awesome," Sam said. "See you later then!"

"But-did-did you _see _that?" Carly exclaimed as Sam left the studio.

"See what?" Freddie asked, beginning to polish his camera lens.

"You told me that the only reason Sam's been ditching me for Wendy lately is because she needed to get all her illegal activity urges out!" Carly said. "But you just heard her! Her and Wendy aren't doing that anymore! They're getting smoothies and painting their nails! Sam _hates _painting her nails! She says it makes it taste weird when she licks bacon grease off her fingers!"

"Oh…well, yeah, I guess that was sort of weird," Freddie admitted. "But I'm sure she didn't mean to exclude you or anything. She-She probably thought you had homework, or-or something."

"Oh come on, Freddie!" Carly snapped. "If you're going to try and make up excuses could you at _least _make them good ones?"

And with that she stormed out of the studio.

…..

"Hey! We got sushi?" Spencer exclaimed about a half-hour later, walking into the apartment, spotting the raw fish on the counter.

"Yup," Carly said bitterly, stabbing her spicy tuna roll with her chopstick.

"Wow, _someone's _in a mood," Spencer commented, helping himself to a California roll.

"I am not in a mood!"

"Okay then," Spencer frowned. He sat down on the couch next to Freddie. "Great show tonight, by the way."

"Thanks," Freddie replied.

"Hey, where's Sam?" Spencer asked, looking around the apartment. "You know, I haven't seen her around here in days, and-ow!" Freddie had elbowed him in the ribs, clearly trying to get him to stop talking.

"_Sam_," Carly snapped, now furiously chewing her sushi. "Clearly doesn't want to spend time with me anymore. Not now that her and Wendy are apparently BFF's."

"Carly, for the millionth time, that's not true," Freddie sighed. "_You're _Sam's best friend."

"Oh really? Then why have I been ditched for the past week and a half?"

"I don't know," Freddie shrugged. "Why don't you ask _Sam _that?"

"You know what?" Carly said, getting to her feet. "I _will_!"

"Where are you going?" Spencer asked as Carly grabbed her bag rom the counter.

"The Groovy Smoothie!" Carly snapped, storming out of the apartment.

"Well…" Freddie said as the door slammed shut. "More soy sauce?"

"Yeah, sure," Spencer nodded.

….

Carly walked into the Groovy Smoothie, spotting Sam and Wendy at a table near the counter.

"Hey you guys!" Carly said cheerfully, sitting herself right down in the chair between Sam and Wendy.

"Um, hey," Sam said, surprised to see her here.

"Um, yeah, hi Carly," Wendy smiled. "I didn't know you were coming."

"Oh well, you know, I was in the neighborhood," Carly shrugged. "Anyway, what a coincidence running into you guys here!"

"But I told you that we'd-" Sam started.

"Hey, now that I'm here, why don't we all hang out for a little bit?" Carly said quickly. "You know, the _three _of us?"

"Okay," Wendy nodded. "That sounds cool."

"Yeah," Sam agreed. "You should try these new coconut smoothies T-Bo just made."

"Yeah, they're _so _good," Wendy nodded. "Sam and I tried them yesterday after school. They were almost as good as those milkshakes from Steak 'N Go."

"Yeah, but at least these aren't…you know," Sam grinned.

Wendy laughed. "Oh my God! I know! Do you think it's still-"

"Probably!"

"Um…w-what?" Carly asked, plastering a smile on her face.

"Oh, the other day," Sam explained. "When we got milkshakes after squirting Peppy Cola at the track team…there was this guy, who kept doing this thing to his milkshake…"

"You really had to be there," Wendy chuckled.

"Oh…yeah, I bet," Carly nodded.

"Anyway, look at what I just found on Splashface," Sam said, showing Wendy her phone.

Wendy burst out laughing. "No way!"

"Um, that's just a picture of a fire hydrant," Carly frowned, craning her neck to see Sam's phone.

"Yeah, I know, but the other day…" Sam said, trying to talk through her laughs.

"Guess I had to be there for that too," Carly mumbled.

"Oh, if we want to do our nails at my place, we should get going," Wendy said, looking at her watch. "Because my mom's chiropractor is coming over in a little bit to use the stuff. You want to come, Carly?"

"Oh, um, n-no," Carly said, realizing that if she did, it would be just more inside jokes between Sam and Wendy. "That's okay…I'll just drink my smoothie alone."

"Alright, see you at school tomorrow," Sam said, grabbing her backpack as her and Wendy headed off.

…..

"Hey, Fredifer," Sam said, letting herself into Freddie's apartment after she got back from Wendy's house. "You up for a little kissing?"

"Um, yeah, of course," Freddie nodded. "But um, you-you think we could talk a little first?"

"Sure," Sam nodded. "What's up?"

"Listen…" Freddie sighed. "Is-Is there a _reason _that you've been spending all this time with Wendy?"

"Um, maybe because her and I are _friends," _Sam frowned.

"I know that," Freddie said. "But you've never hung out with her so much before…and when you do, Carly's usually there with you guys."

"Well, she-she doesn't like doing the stuff that me and Wendy like to do," Sam pointed out.

"Yeah, but tonight you went over and did your _nails _with her," Freddie said. "That's the Carliest activity I've ever heard of!"

"Well why's that bug you?" Sam asked.

"It's not _me_, that it's bugging," Freddie told her gently.

Sam stared at him. "You-You don't mean…is _Carly _upset?"

"Well wouldn't you be?" Freddie asked. "I mean, she's your best friend, and lately the only time you even see her is for a few minutes at school and when we do iCarly."

"That's probably why she came over to the Smoothie…" Sam sighed.

"I mean are you _mad _at her or something?" Freddie frowned. "Because I've got to say, Sam, I don't really know why you would all of the sudden just cut her out of your life like-"

"It's because I wanted to start preparing myself!" Sam exclaimed.

"Um…what?"

"We're seniors, Freddie," Sam said heavily. "In a few months, her and I are going our separate ways…She's going to California, I'm staying here…we're not going to be around each other every day, and-and let's face it. She's gonna make a whole bunch of new friends in college, and-and I don't know. I thought maybe if I started getting used to spending time without her now, it would be easier when we were actually apart."

"But Sam…that-that's crazy, baby," Freddie said. "You and Carly…I've never seen any two friends who were as close as you two. And a little thing like distance is _not _going to change that. I promise."

"But what if she finds someone she likes better than me?" Sam mumbled.

"Come on, Sam, you remember earlier this year when you and me went through this same thing when we realized we were going to be apart for college?" Freddie told her. "And you remember what we said? We both said that we had enough faith in our relationship to trust that it would last no matter where we were. Well, the same thing goes for you and Carly."

Sam didn't reply.

"Sam, I think you need to tell Carly how you've been feeling," Freddie said softly. "It will really make you feel a lot better."

"You think?" Sam asked.

Freddie nodded. "She's over across the hall now…"

…

Sam knocked at the Shay's door and slowly opened it.

"Hey," she said, spotting Carly on the couch, watching a movie.

"Hey," Carly said coldly. "Shouldn't you be hanging out with Wendy? You know, your best friend who you have all the little jokes with and likes doing bad things with you!"

Sam sighed. "Okay…I guess I had that coming…can I just talk to you?"

Carly glared at her. "What?"

"Look," Sam said, sitting down next to her. "I'm sorry I've kind of been…ignoring you lately."

Carly scoffed and said nothing.

"It's just, I-I wanted to get the hard part over with," Sam said.

Carly frowned. "What hard part?"

"When we aren't together next year," Sam replied. "You know, when we're not even in the same _state_. We've been inseperatable since we were eight! How am I supposed to handle you being like, ten hours away? Who am I supposed to hang out with?"

"Wait…" Carly said slowly. "Isn't this like your little freak attack you had a few months ago about you and Freddie being apart?"

Sam nodded. "But this is different," she mumbled. "Freddie's my boyfriend…unless he actually goes scouting out another girlfriend, which he _won't_, if he knows what's good for him, our relationship will be safe. Sure, it will be a little harder to do the distance thing, but it's doable. But you're my best friend, and when you're in California, you're not even going to have to scout out a new best friend; you'll have opportunities all around you! Your roommate, your classmates…anyone! I mean it's like the only way you _won't _make a new best friend is if you never go outside! I just thought, you know, if I got used to the whole separation thing now, it wouldn't be so hard next year."

"Oh, Sam!" Carly said, throwing her arms around her best friend. "You are so _ridiculous_!"

"Um, thanks?" Sam frowned.

"Come on, I can't believe you think I would find a new best friend at college next year," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Sure, I may make new _friends_, but you'll always be my best friend."

"You say that now," Sam mumbled.

"Sam," Carly said. "Unless I'm _very _much mistaken, there is only _one _crazy, insane, food-obsessed chick who can not only flip a truck driver, but beat up half the dudes in the MMA. And that's you! There's no one else out there, which means that there's no one else I'd ever want to be my best friend."

Sam gave a small smile. "You mean that?"

"Yeah I do!" Carly said, hugging her best friend again. "And I'm just glad that you weren't trying to replace me with Wendy as _your _best friend."

"Please," Sam grinned. "Wendy's cool and all, but do you know how _exhausting _it is getting into trouble _all the time_? And then when we just chill, like tonight, she does it all wrong! She actually _bakes _her cookie dough, and buys the whipped frosting instead of the chocolate!"

"Madness," Carly chuckled.

"Hey, cool if I come in now?" Freddie asked, opening the front door a bit.

"Yes, Sam and I are good again," Carly told him. "And actually, Sam, we have a lot of best friend bonding time to make up for."

"Oh yeah, you're right," Sam nodded. "Junk food and sucky movie?"

"You know it," Carly smiled. She turned to Freddie. "Um, Freddie, I don't mean to be mean, but-"

"You're not invited," Sam said bluntly.

"Well thanks," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Sam, you can't be rude to your boyfriend," Carly sighed.

"Eh, the nub knows I love him," Sam said, giving him a quick kiss. "But seriously, baby, unless you want to have it go down in history that you actually participated in a 'girls night', you might want to leave."

"Don't worry, I'll go," Freddie laughed. "But this means we'll have to reschedule our night…my mom works late tomorrow too…"

"I'm there," Sam said, wrapping her arms around him, giving him a long kiss. "And hey," she whispered. "Thanks."


	305. Chapter 305

_Alphabet_

"Hmm, no, no, I don't think that's it," Spencer frowned, looking at the computer screen on his kitchen counter as he sipped his juice.

"What are you looking up?" Carly asked, coming downstairs, running a brush quickly through her hair.

"Well, I was sculpting my giant statue of tambourines," he explained. "And I got to thinking…who the heck invented the alphabet?"

"Ah, yes, I always think about that when I play with tambourines," Carly smiled.

"Are you _mocking _me?"

"No, no, not at all," Carly laughed. "So who invented the alphabet?"

"I don't know!" Spencer exclaimed. "The stupid Internet isn't giving me a straight answer!"

Carly gave a fake gasp. "But the Internet never fails!"

"You know, I could do without the sarcasm, thank you!" Spencer snapped. He stormed off to his bedroom just as Sam ran into the apartment. "Hey! Hey guess what?"

"What?" Carly asked. "Did you finally find out where that butcher throws out his leftover meats?"

"No, but I've got it narrowed down to three dumpsters," Sam said. She unzipped her backpack and pulled out a black t-shirt and tossed it to Carly. "Look what I just got at the mall."

"Um, a _Galaxy Wars _t-shirt?" Carly frowned, unfolding the shirt.

"Yeah, isn't it awesome?" Sam grinned.

"Well, I-I guess," Carly shrugged. "I just never thought I'd live to see the day when Sam Puckett would willingly wear a _Galaxy Wars _shirt. I guess dating Freddie's really starting to take its toll on you."

"The shirt's not for me, Carls," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "It's for Freddie! You know how he's always going out and buying me presents and chiz for no good reason? Well, now I decided I could give it a try. I saw this at that nerd shop at the mall this morning and I thought he'd _love _it."

"Aw, that's sweet," Carly said, tossing the shirt back to Sam. "When are you gonna give it to him?"

"Now, I just knocked on his door and told him to get over here," Sam said. "He just had to finish letting his mom steam him for ticks."

About ten seconds later Freddie entered the apartment, coughing slightly.

"I swear, I'm starting to think the tick baths were better than that thing," Freddie mumbled.

"I told you, you say the word, and my Uncle Carmine-"

"Sam, baby, I don't want you to have my mother 'taken care of'," Freddie sighed. "I mean, as much as I appreciate the offer…"

"Hey, I only offer his services to certain people, and _someone_ made the cut," Sam said, kissing him.

"Well I am _honored_," Freddie chuckled.

"Oh, stop being adorable and just give your boyfriend his present," Carly said.

"Present?" Freddie repeated. "What present?"

"Well, I decided to be an even more amazing girlfriend than I already am and get you this!" Sam said proudly, handing him the shirt.

"Oh…wow," Freddie smiled, unfolding the shirt. "This is…this is pretty awesome, baby!"

"You like it?" Sam asked.

"Like it?" Freddie scoffed. "Try _love_."

"Aw, I knew you would," Sam said, wrapping her arms around him. "I saw it at the mall and I thought it would be just perfect for you."

"Well…it sure is," Freddie said.

"Hey, Sam?" Carly said, looking down at her phone. "Did you order a pizza and use my phone number again? Because I just got a text that there's a meat lover's special waiting in the lobby."

"Oh good, I'm starved," Sam said, untangling herself from Freddie.

"Why don't you just use your own number when you order?" Carly asked.

"Because I'm banned from the place," Sam said. "Because _apparently _when the delivery boy takes over an _hour _to deliver your pizza, it's not okay to teach him a lesson!"

"Poor pizza boy," Carly said as Sam hurried down to the lobby to retrieve her snack. She turned to Freddie, who was still staring at his new shirt. "Hey, you gonna go put that on?"

"Um…maybe-maybe some other time," Freddie said.

"Well, I think Sam would really like it if you wore it," Carly said. "She was really excited about giving it to you."

"I'll wear it," Freddie said. "You know, some time when I won't be around people with eyes."

"What are you saying? You don't like the shirt?" Carly frowned.

"It's not that I don't like the shirt," Freddie sighed. "It's just…I wouldn't exactly ever buy it for myself."

"Oh my God, you hate the shirt!" Carly exclaimed.

"Shh! I don't '_hate_' it!" Freddie hissed.

"Well what's wrong with it?" Carly demanded. "You love _Galaxy Wars_! Your room is plastered in stupid posters with Proton Cruisers and Sky Naughts and light stick thingies!"

"Yes, I know that," Freddie nodded. "But it's just…this shirt's a little on the _nerdy _side."

"Of course it is! It's _Galaxy Wars_!"

"Even in the _Galaxy Wars _community, this is considered major dork apparel," Freddie mumbled. "I mean its got so many inaccuracies on it I'm surprised it's even allowed to be sold. Besides, in case you haven't noticed, I don't bring any of my _Galaxy Wars _stuff to school or anything! If I wore this shirt to school people would never let me live it down."

"Dude, it's not secret to anybody at school that you love _Galaxy Wars_," Carly said, crossing her arms.

"I know, but still, wearing this t-shirt would just be asking to be beaten up," Freddie said.

"Unbelievable," Carly said, shaking her head. "Sam finally goes and does something nice for you for no reason, and you don't appreciate it."

"I appreciate it!" Freddie said quickly. "I really do! It means a lot to me that she would buy me this, especially since I know she hates _Galaxy Wars _herself. But, you know…that doesn't really help the fact that this shirt is…not the best. I mean don't you remember how much you hated that baseball cap that Chet guy you were dating last month gave _you_? You never wore it, but you let him think it was the best present you ever got. I can do the same thing with Sam here."

"Well…okay," Carly sighed. "But will you please just make sure you wear it once so she can see it? Even if it's on a day where we just stay in here? It would mean a lot."

"Yeah, okay," Freddie nodded.

"Mama's back with the food!" Sam said, returning in the elevator with a pizza box. She looked over at Freddie. "You don't want to try on your shirt, baby?"

"Um…I-Not if we're having pizza!" Freddie said smoothly. "You think I would risk smearing this shirt with pizza grease? As if!"

Sam smiled. "Good idea."

"Alright," Spencer said, coming back into the room with a large encyclopedia. "If the Internet can't help me, I'll do this the medieval way and look up the alphabet in this thing!"

"They have offline encyclopedias?" Sam frowned. "Whoa! Since when?"

…

"Hey, I smell pancakes!" Freddie said brightly the next morning, walking into the Shay's apartment.

"Yeah, that's our new pancake scented candle," Carly said, nodding over at the burning candle on the counter. "All we've got over here for breakfast is shredded wheat."

"Well…that's misleading," Freddie said. "And aren't you a little…worried about having candles near Spencer?"

"Nah, for some reason he can never actually manage to light a candle," Carly said. "The wick just won't burn for him."

"How ironic," Freddie said.

"Where are the pancakes?" Sam asked, bursting into the apartment, her giant fork drawn.

"It's just a candle," Carly told her.

"Aw man! You can't do that to a person!" Sam pouted. She looked over at her boyfriend. "Hey? You-You aren't going to wear your shirt to school?"

"Oh!" Freddie said, caught off guard. "I-I-yeah. Of-Of course I am. I just-I thought we were going to be eating pancakes over here so I wore this ratty old shirt so I wouldn't get syrup on the one _you _gave me. But, um, since-since we're clearly _not _having pancakes, I guess-I guess there's really no reason for me to not put on the shirt now!"

"Okay, well, hurry up, I want to see how it looks on you," Sam told him.

"Okay…" Freddie said with a strained smile. "I'll be right back…"

"Hey, did I leave my pork rinds upstairs the other day?" Sam asked as Freddie went back to his apartment.

"Yes, and you realize you left a huge pile of crumbs up there?" Carly said. "You should really be more careful and-yup. She's gone."

"Hey, I hope you guys saved me some pancakes!" Gibby said, entering the apartment. He spotted the candle on the counter. "Oh man! I was tricked again by a candle? This is like Dingo World all over again!"

"Okay, Sam," Freddie said, coming back into the apartment, wearing his new _Galaxy War _shirt and a plastered on smile. "I'm wearing-hey. Where is she?"

"Upstairs, probably eating stale pork rinds," Carly said.

"Dude, that shirt's horrible," Gibby frowned.

"Hey! It _happens _to be a gift from Sam!" Freddie defended.

"Why? What'd you do to her?"

"Oh man, you see? Even Gibby thinks the shirt is lame!" Freddie moaned.

"I thought you weren't going to wear it in public," Carly pointed out. "What happened? You can't say no to Sam?"

"Come on, Carly, you know if I told her I didn't want to wear this shirt to school she would _murder _me," Freddie said. "I don't want to hurt her feelings _or _deal with the bruises."

"Oh come on, she wouldn't _hurt _you," Carly said.

Freddie gave her a look.

"Okay…maybe she would a little."

"Anyway, I've got it all taken care of for school," Freddie said, pulling a hoodie out of his backpack. "I'll just wear this over it. No one will see it, Sam will be happy I'm wearing the shirt. It's a win-win."

"Um, you do realize it's like, ninety degrees outside," Carly said. "Not exactly hoodie weather."

"I'll just say I think I'm coming down with a cold or something," Freddie shrugged.

"Hey, looking hot, Fredward," Sam smiled, coming back downstairs with her bag of pork rinds.

"Only because I'm in this shirt," Freddie said, taking his girlfriend's hand. "Now come on; we'd better get to school."

…

"Man, does this school not believe in air conditioning?" Freddie panted, moping the sweat off his brow with the sleeve of his hoodie.

"I think they have this crazy idea that kids generally dress according the season," Carly said, somewhat amused as the two teens stood by their lockers after school that day. "Dude, come on, why don't you just take the hoodie off?"

"Because I can't be seen in this shirt, Carly!" Freddie snapped.

"Well then just suffer through the heat!" Carly said.

"Believe me," Freddie said. "This is nothing to the pain I'd be in if Sam found out how I feel about this shirt," Freddie said. "She'd probably kick me right in the-"

"Hey Sam!" Carly said loudly, signaling for Freddie's to be quiet.

"Hey," Sam replied. She looked over at Freddie. "Whoa. You don't look good."

"Thanks," Freddie mumbled.

"You know what I think you need?" Sam said. "Fresh air. Come on, let's go to the park for a little bit."

"The-The park?" Freddie frowned. "You mean right now? In the heat of the day?"

"Yeah, you probably just need to sweat this thing out of your system," Sam nodded. "Then you'll feel better."

"Well, have fun you two," Carly said, trying not to laugh at Freddie's expression.

"Come on," Sam said, taking his hand as Carly walked off.

"Okay," Freddie said weakly.

The couple walked across the street to the large park, where the sun was glaring down. Freddie cursed internally at the sight of the _many _people present. If only the shirt wasn't so humiliating!

"Come on, let's sit," Sam said, pulling him over to a bench right underneath the sun's glare.

"Um…wouldn't you rather go sit in the shade?" Freddie asked.

"Nope," Sam said simply.

"Oh…well alright," Freddie sighed, sitting down next to her, frying.

"You know, baby, you look really hot," Sam said.

"Thanks," Freddie mumbled.

"No, I mean _literally _hot," Sam said. "Maybe you're sweating too much. Why don't you just take your hoodie off and-"

"No!" Freddie said quickly. "I mean…I'm fine. Really."

"No, come on, just take it off," Sam said.

"No, I-"

"You're going to get heat stroke, and then I'm going to have to explain it to your wacko mother," Sam said, grabbing the sleeves of his hoodie, trying to yank it over his head. "So just cooperate and-"

"Sam! No!" Freddie exclaimed. "I don't want to take my hoodie off."

Sam narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms. "Freddie," she said softly. "Why won't you take your hoodie off?"

"Er, because," Freddie said. "I-I, um."

Sam shook her head. "I knew it."

"Knew what?" Freddie frowned.

"That you're afraid of me!" Sam said, leaning back in the bench miserably. "You're so afraid to tell me that you hate that shirt that you're willing to melt to avoid it!"  
"I don't hate this shirt!" Freddie said quickly. "I-"

"Give it a rest," Sam mumbled. "You're faker than Ginger Fox's new nose."

"You-You knew?" Freddie asked. "Sam, baby, I'm sorry. I know you probably though I would love this, but-"

"No I didn't!" Sam snapped. "I bought that shirt _because _I knew you'd hate it! I asked the guy at the store to give me the shirt that would disgust a _Galaxy Wars _fan the most, and that's what he gave me!"

"What?" Freddie exclaimed. "Why?"

"Because I wanted to see if it was true!" Sam said. "What everyone says at school…that you're afraid of me…I wanted to see if you'd actually look me in the eye and just tell me the truth like a normal person instead of doing all this!"

"People say I'm afraid of you?" Freddie asked softly.

"Yeah," Sam answered glumly. "And now I know it's true."

"No it's not," Freddie said quickly.

Sam looked up at him. "Freddie…what was the reason you didn't tell me how you felt about the shirt?"

"Because I didn't want to hurt your feelings," Freddie replied at once.

"Yeah, that may have been a little part of the reason," Sam sighed. "But no one would spend an entire afternoon in the middle of a heat wave sweating in a hot hoodie just to protect someone's feelings. Not even you. Come on, you know you were afraid that I would pound you or something."

Freddie didn't reply.

"Yeah, I thought so," Sam said.

"Sam…I-I don't know what to say," Freddie said. "I'm sorry."

"I'm not mad…" Sam said. "I just…I just don't want you to be afraid of me, okay? I know I'm not exactly a 'gentle' person, but..I care about you. And I would never _actually _hurt you. Bruise you, maybe, but I wouldn't ever do something _terrible _to you."

Freddie smiled. "I know that," he said, leaning down to kiss her. "And you know what? I think this was a good lesson for both of us. We need to know that we can be absolutely honest with each other about anything. That's important for a couple."

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "But let's get home, baby. You need to cool off."

"Eh," Freddie shrugged, peeling off his hoodie. "I think I'll be fine now."

"But people are gonna see that shirt," Sam said. "Which, by the way, is just _so _ugly."  
"Maybe," Freddie agreed. "But you know what? I realized I don't care. The point is that it was bought for me by my amazing, beautiful girlfriend. Even if she did have ulterior motives with it. And because of that, I think this may be my new favorite shirt."


	306. Chapter 306

**AN-I'd be lying if I didn't say this was definitely inspired by a Friends episode, but I hope you enjoy it anyway!**

…**.**

_Flower_

"Hey? Carls?" Sam whispered, poking her head into her best friend's apartment. "Fredward here?"

"Um, no," Carly frowned, closing her magazine. "Why?"

"Oh, you know, just-just wondering," Sam said, now coming into the apartment.

"Okay," Carly shrugged. "Hey, it's pretty hot out today. What do you say we _find _that boyfriend of yours and get Spencer to drive us to the beach?"

"No!" Sam said quickly.

"Why not?" Carly asked. "You love the beach! We both know you like having an excuse to gawk at Freddie without a shirt."

"It's just…let's not do the beach or pool or anything like that for like, two months, okay?' Sam said.

"Okay, Puckett, what's going on?" Carly sighed.

Sam sighed. "Lock the door, then I'll show you."

"Lock the door?"

"Yes! Now go or I'm not gonna show you!"

"Alright, alright!" Carly said, giving Sam a strange look as she locked the front door. "Now what is it that-Oh my God!"

Sam had lifted up the edge of her shirt to reveal her hip, which was now inked with a pig eating a piece of fried chicken.

"Is that a _tattoo_?" Carly whispered, her eyes widening.

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "I got it a few hours ago…What do you think?"

"I mean, it looks nice," Carly said. "I just never knew you were thinking of getting one."

"Eh, I've had the idea in the back of my mind for a few weeks," Sam shrugged. "I wasn't planning on getting one _now _though. But then on my way to get some ribs this morning, I passed the tattoo parlor and saw an old friend of my mom's in there and I figured…why not?"

"Did it hurt?" Carly asked. "Your hip's still really red."

"No," Sam said quickly.

Carly gave her a knowing look.

"Okay, fine, yes it hurt," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "But it was worth it."

"As long you like it, then, I guess," Carly smiled. "But…wait a minute. Does Freddie know you got a tattoo?"

Sam looked down at her shoes. "Um…I-I didn't really exactly _mention _it to him."

"Ohhhh," Carly nodded. "And you don't know how he's going to react, huh?"

"Well I don't think he's ever been the biggest fan of tattoos in the first place," Sam sighed. "You think he'll be mad?"

"Nah, even if he doesn't love tattoos, he loves you," Carly told her. "It's your body, and Freddie's not the type of guy to be all controlling about that stuff."

"I know," Sam said. "But still…don't mention it to him yet, okay? I'll tell him myself. Eventually."

…

Sam yawned as she headed down into her kitchen, still wearing her pajamas.

"Morning, baby," Freddie said brightly from the kitchen.

"Hey," Sam frowned. "What-What are you doing here?"

"Your mom let me in on the way to some single's festival," Freddie explained. "So I thought I'd make you a little breakfast."

"Eggs, bacon, French toast," Sam smiled. "Wow, you know how to really earn your boyfriend points."

Freddie chuckled, snaking his arms around her waist as he leaned down to kiss her.

Sam winced slightly as Freddie put his arms on her hips. Her one hip was still a bit tender from the tattoo.

"What's wrong?" Freddie asked, noticing.

"Nothing," Sam said quickly, tugging down her tank top, which was beginning to rise up. "Just really starved."

"Well good thing breakfast is now done," Freddie said, piling several strips of bacon onto a plate, along with the eggs and French toast.

"So how about you and I chill out here and watch T.V. or something before we go to Carly's house?" Freddie suggested.

"Hey, the longer I can put off getting dressed, the better," Sam said. "You want some orange juice? My mom dated a produce manager last week, so we have a whole bunch of fruit juices."

"Yeah, okay," Freddie nodded, setting two plates on the table.

Sam headed to the cabinet to grab the glasses. She had to stand on her toes and stretch her arm to try and get them, since they were on the top shelf.

"Here, let me help you," Freddie said, chuckling at the sight of his small girlfriend struggling to get the glasses. He reached for them easily, but as he handed them to Sam, he frowned.

"Hey, what's that there?"

"What?" Sam asked, grabbing the juice from the fridge.

"On your hip," Freddie said.

"Huh? Oh! N-Nothing!" Sam said, nearly dropping the juice as she yanked down the edge of her tank top, which had risen as she tried to get the glasses.

"Was that like a bruise or something?" Freddie asked.

"Um, it's just a birthmark," Sam said quickly.

"You don't have a birthmark on your hip," Freddie said. "You have one on the bottom of your foot, but not on-"

"Okay, look, just…don't freak out, okay?" Sam conceded.

"Freak out about what?" Freddie asked as Sam lifted up the bottom of her shirt to show him her tattoo.

He stared at for a minute, and Sam felt herself growing more and more nervous as each second went by.

"Well…say something," she finally said.

"Is-Is that, you know, Henna?" Freddie asked slowly.

Sam shook her head. "It's real, baby."

"Oh," Freddie said lamely. "And, um, how-how long have you had it?"

"I got it yesterday," Sam replied. "I just thought it looked cool…I mean I saw this chick in there getting a tattoo of a flower in there and I thought it looked awesome. Obviously I didn't want to get the same tattoo, but, you know…Look, are you mad?"

"I'm not mad," Freddie said, still staring at the tattoo on his girlfriend's hip.

"Yes you are," Sam sighed. "I probably should've talked to you at least a little before I got it, but I really wanted-" she was cut off as he pressed his lips to hers, hard.

"Sam," he said when they finally pulled apart. "I'm okay with this. I'm not in charge of what you put on your body."

"Yeah, but you don't like tattoos," Sam mumbled.

"You know, I didn't think I did…" Freddie said, still eyeing her hip. "But I've got to say, baby…I think I _really _like this one…it looks sort of…sexy."

"Really?" Sam grinned.

"Uh-huh," Freddie nodded, pulling her closer to him. "_Very_."


	307. Chapter 307

_Pebble_

"Man, I can't believe we have to go to this stupid wedding," Sam mumbled, holding tightly onto her and Freddie's two-year old son, Tyler's, hand, as the Benson family waited in line at the ticket window at the train station. "I mean, Faye Dorfman isn't even related to us! She's Carly's cousin!"

"Yeah, but Carly felt bad that she was only going to have like, fifteen wedding guests," Freddie reminded his wife. "Come on, cheer up. You can have wedding cake!"

"Mommy! Tell Emma to stop pulling my hair!" their six-year old daughter, Ashton, suddenly shouted.

"She started it! She called me dumb!" Emma retorted.

"Yeah, I better get at least ten pieces, for taking four kids on a train ride to Olympia," Sam sighed. She looked down at the twins. "Emma, stop pulling Ashton's hair. Ashton, don't call your sister names."

"This is going to be a long trip, isn't it?" Freddie said.

"Jason? I wanna play your game!" Emma said, tugging at her older brother's arm.

"No way!" ten-year old Jason snapped, looking up from the game he was playing on his Pintendo G.S. "I'm almost at a high score."  
"But we're _bored_," Ashton moaned.

"Bored! Me bored!" Tyler said, pulling at Sam's arms. "Mommy pay!"

"Mommy has to wait in line with daddy," Sam said, kneeling down. "Because daddy won't let mommy go take a nap over by the pizza stand…"

"Pay now!" Tyler pouted stubbornly. "I want pay now!"

"I think he's starting to get a little cranky," Freddie sighed, scooping up the toddler in his arms. "I'll hold him so he can nap."

"No nap!" Tyler said loudly, but closed his eyes slowly as he rested his head on his father's shoulder.

"Here you two," Sam said, pulling her Pearpad out of her bag and handing it to the twins. "_Share _it."

"Good parenting, hand them over to technology," Freddie said.

"Hey, you got any better ideas, Fredwad?" Sam snapped.

"Hey, I was about to do the same thing," Freddie said.

"Man, how long have we been in line?" Sam moaned.

"Close to an hour and a half," Freddie replied, looking at his watch. "And we have…eight people ahead of us. I calculated that on average, it takes each person four and a half minutes at the window, which means we have roughly…thirty-six minutes left in line."

"Wow, it's like you're saying 'punch me, punch me!" Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Mom! Emma won't share the Pearpad!" Ashton whined loudly.

"She had her turn!" Emma retorted.

"Mom!" Jason moaned. "Dad! They're making me mess up in my game!"

"It's Emma's fault!"

"Is not!"

"Is so!"

"It's both your faults!"

"And it's gonna be a long thirty six minutes, isn't it?" Sam sighed.

…..

Nearly forty minutes later, Sam and Freddie had purchased six train tickets and were now looking around the packed station for their boarding site.

"Mom! I'm hungry!" Jason said. "Can't we eat?"

"We told you five times, Jason, on the train," Sam said, holding onto both the twins hands, who were struggling to try and free themselves so they could run around.

"Emma, Ashton, you need to stay with us," Freddie told the girls firmly. "This is a crowded place, okay, we don't want to lose any of you." He turned back to Sam. "So where the heck is this boarding sight? It said platform eight, but all I see is platforms twelve through sixteen."

"Let me see the tickets," Sam sighed, letting go of the girls hands. She looked down at them quickly. "You stay by us, got it?"

"Look, the map's showing that we're in the right spot," Freddie said, pointing to the small scaled map that was drawn the back of the tickets, shifting Tyler in his arms as the toddler played with his collar. "But no platform eight. You think maybe they-Come on, Tyler. _Please _stop playing with daddy's shirt?"

"Here, give him to me," Sam said, taking Tyler from her husband. "Look, that sign over there says platforms six through eleven are that way, so I guess we head over there."

"Alright," Freddie nodded. He held out his hands for the twins to take. "Come on, girls, Jason."

Freddie was just about to set off after Sam, until he realized that there was only one tiny hand grasping his. He looked down to see only one of the twins.

"Sam? You have Emma?" Freddie asked.

"No," Sam said, pulling her hair out of Tyler's fist. "She's standing next to Ashton."

"No she's not!"

"What?" Sam frowned, turning back around. "Where is she?"

"Ashton, where's your sister?" Freddie asked, looking around, hoping to spot Emma nearby.

Ashton shrugged. "I dunno."

"Ashton, what do you mean you don't know?" Sam said, trying not sound panicked, but Freddie knew she, like him, was very close to having a freak attack. The train station was _very _packed. "She was standing right next to you and Jason."

"She said she wanted a snack, so she went to go find food," Ashton replied.

"Jason?" Freddie said desperately. "Did you see Emma go off?"

Jason shook his head, looking somewhat guilty and worried. "No."

"Oh man," Sam said anxiously. "Please tell me we didn't lose her!"

"We need to keep calm," Freddie said, though he could feel the panic building up inside of him.

"How can we keep calm? Our six year old is lost in the middle of a train station with a million people in it!" Sam exclaimed. "Oh…it's all my fault! I let go of her hand for ten seconds and-"

"Sam, listen, go to the security office over there with the kids," Freddie told her. "I'll-I'll look around and see if I find her myself."

Sam nodded as her and the other three kids set off for the security office.

Freddie couldn't believe that this was happening…every parents' worse nightmare. He wondered if his little girls was scared…or hurt…He quickly ran through the train station, scanning everywhere in search of a tiny blonde head.

"Emma!" he called. "Emma! Emma!" He looked by the row of food carts, praying that she'd be in line trying to get herself a slice of pizza. But there was no sign of her.

Freddie felt beads of sweat rolling down his face. How could his daughter be lost? How could he have let this happen? What if he never saw her again?

Suddenly, he heard a soft whimper coming from behind a large potted plant near the corner. He rushed over and his heart nearly skipped a beat when he saw Emma crouched down, crying.

"Emma!" he said, relief rushing through his body as he picked his daughter up and held her tightly. "Oh, sweetie, thank God you're okay."

"Daddy!" Emma sobbed, her tears dripping onto his shirt. "Daddy, I lost you!"

"It's okay baby, shhh," Freddie said gently, stroking her hair. "I got you now."

"I just wanted to get something to eat," Emma sniffed. "And then I saw this really shiny pebble, and then when I got it, you and mommy were gone!"

Freddie rubbed her back, trying to calm his normally brave and aggressive daughter down. "Alright, sweetie, you're okay. But you had me and mommy really scared…"

"I'm sorry," Emma said weakly as Freddie wiped her tears away.

"That's okay," Freddie said, still hugging her tightly. He kissed the top of her head. "Come on, your mommy's still really worried about you."

He began walking back towards the security window.

"Daddy?" Emma said softly.

"What is it, Em?"

"Don't tell Ashton I cried, okay?"  
Freddie chuckled. "It will be our little secret," he promised.

…

"Mommy!"

"Oh, Emma come here!" Sam said, taking her daughter from Freddie and hugging her tightly. "You had me so freaked out…Where _were _you?"

"By the food carts, where else?" Freddie said.

"I'm so glad you're okay," Sam said, releasing Emma from her grasp. "But Emma, if you _ever _wander off again from me or daddy like that again, you're going to be in _big _trouble, got it?"

Emma nodded.

"Oh come here," Sam sighed, hugging her again.

"Were you scared?" Ashton asked her twin. "Did you cry?"

"No!" Emma said defensively.

"I bet you did," Ashton said. She turned to Freddie. "Did she daddy?"

"Nope," Freddie said, shaking his head. "Emma was very brave."

"Alright, well, we need to hurry up if we want to still catch our train," Sam said.

"Right," Freddie nodded. "And everyone stay with us this time!"

He took Emma and Tyler's hands. He looked down and Emma and gave her a small wink, and Emma beamed up at him.


	308. Chapter 308

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 291, where it was pretty much iOMG, but with Emma and Quincy. **

…**..**

_Window_

"I'm bored," Tyler announced, coming downstairs and sitting himself down on the couch between his two parents.

"Well _maybe _that's because you're supposed to be in bed," Sam told him.

"Yeah, Ty, it's after midnight," Freddie said, looking at his watch.

"I'm not tired," Tyler said. "It's not fair. Jason's at college and Emma and Ashton get to sleep at their school. I want to go somewhere!"

"Tyler, come on, you get to go places," Sam said, rustling her hair.

"No I don't! Being the youngest sucks," he pouted.

Freddie sighed. "Alright, how about this? If you go to sleep right now, tomorrow morning you and I will get up early and I'll drive you down to that young fans training camp at the Cobra's stadium."

"Alright!" Tyler exclaimed happily, quickly getting to his feet and running upstairs.

"You're gonna sit through six hours of football stuff with him?" Sam asked.

"No," Freddie said. "There's no rule that says _I _have to play football. I'm bringing my laptop, sitting in the stands, and watching the entire _Galaxy Wars _trilogy. You know I can't throw a ball or catch a ball or tackle people before they get a ball."

"I know that baby," Sam smirked.

"Anyway," Freddie sighed, getting up. "I should go to sleep; got to be up at six now…"

"Yeah, I'll come with you," Sam yawned. "Since now this means that _I _have to wake up early to pick up the twins and Clarissa in the morning."

The couple started up the steps when they suddenly heard a loud _thump. _

"Tyler's probably tearing apart his bedroom right now trying to find his Cobra's jersey," Freddie sighed.

They headed towards their youngest son's bedroom, only to find him fast asleep in his bed.

"Huh, that's weird," Freddie frowned. "I wonder what that noise was."

"Eh, probably just the wind," Sam shrugged. "Now come on, let's get to-"

But just then they heard another _thump_.

"Sounds like it came from the twins room," Freddie commented.

"They probably left their T.V. on," Sam said. "I'll go turn it off."

"So can you give me a little quick tutorial on this whole _football _thing," Freddie said as they headed towards the twins room. "You know, so I don't look like a _total _idiot in front-Emma?"

The couple had just opened the girls room, which they had expected to be empty, only to find Emma in it, closing her bedroom window.

"Oh, um…hey," Emma said awkwardly.

"What are you doing here? You're supposed to be at the lock-in!" Sam exclaimed.

"Yeah…I wasn't really feeling that," Emma said lamely. "So I sort of came home."

"Okay, _please _tell me that you didn't walk all the way here from the school in the middle of the night," Freddie said.

"No, I called a cab," Emma said, rolling her eyes. "And then I climbed up that tree by my window to get in here."

"Well why didn't you just call one of us to pick you up?" Sam asked.

"Because I knew you'd make me stay!"

"You bet we would've," Freddie said, crossing his arms. "Emma, this is getting ridiculous. You need to start taking your schoolwork more seriously; this is your end-of-semester project! You can't just leave it all for Ashton and Clarissa to do again!"

"She worked with Quincy and some kid from the pottery club," Sam told her husband.

"Oh…well you can't just make Quincy and his friend do all the work either!" Freddie said.

"I didn't!" Emma retorted. "I did my part of the stupid project before I left."

"But _why _did you leave?" Sam asked. "If you finished your stuff than you could've slept! Or _ate_!"

"I just wanted to come home, okay?" Emma snapped. "God, why do I have to get the third-degree for every little thing that I do?"

"Whoa, what up with the 'tude?" Sam asked, frowning.

"Yeah, what is going on here?" Freddie asked. "Something's got to be up."

"Fine," Emma mumbled, her voice less harsh. "But can I…Can I just talk to mom about it? Please?"

"Oh, um, okay," Sam nodded, giving Freddie a look that told him that she would handle this.

"Alright," Freddie said, heading out of the room, leaving his wife and daughter.

"Okay Em," Sam sighed, sitting down on the edge of her bed. "What's up? Why'd you leave the lock-in?"

"Because," Emma said, flinging herself down onto her bed, burying her head in one of her pillows as she mumbled something incoherent.

"Um…what's that?" Sam asked.

Emma mumbled something again that something couldn't hear.

"Look, I'm sure your _pillow _can hear you just fine," Sam said. "But I can't. So honey, why don't you sit up and-"

"I kissed Quincy!" Emma said loudly.

Sam blinked. "You-You mean Quincy _Gibson?_"

"Yes," Emma mumbled, slowly sitting up against her headboard.

"Oh…" Sam said, a bit unsure of how to react. "Well, um…w-why?"

"I don't know," Emma said miserably. "I was outside being all mad at Clarissa and Ashton because they tried to hook me up with Quincy's friend, Andrew, who they thought I liked because I was apparently being a lot nicer than I usually am lately, and then Quincy came out, and he said some things and then I-I kissed him!"

"Well, okay, Emma, do-do you _like _Quincy then?"

"I don't know," Emma said again, sighing. "Maybe? No! I don't! I _hate _him. He's weird and dorky and has stupid hobbies…but I can't help it! He-He doesn't seem so bad lately, and whenever I hang out with him, I start to feel…weird."

Sam gave her a small smile. "Emma, listen, I know Quincy's really…odd. But I mean, that's not all his fault; look at who his dad is! Anyway, I know he's not exactly a normal guy, and I know that the idea of liking him is probably freaking you out a _lot _right now, but there was obviously a part of you that _wanted _to kiss him, and probably a part of you that _enjoyed _it."

Emma didn't reply.

"And, let me guess, you ran back here before you could even give him a chance to respond," Sam said knowingly.

Emma nodded. "How am I ever supposed to look at him again after this? He's never going to stop holding this over me! I can't believe I did that…"

"First of all, I've known Quincy his whole life, and he's a nice guy," Sam told her. "He wouldn't hold this over you. Second, have you ever thought that maybe…maybe he liked the kiss too?"

"No…" Emma said softly.

"Well, then you should talk to him tomorrow, and-"

"No," Emma said firmly. "Uh-uh, nope. Not gonna happen; I-I'm going to pretend that this whole thing never happened. I know, I'll tell him that there was barbecue sauce or something on the corned of his mouth, and I was really hungry, so I-I tried to get it."

"Emma," Sam said gently. "When I was your age…someone told me that I couldn't keep doing exactly what you're doing now; that I had to stop being so scared to put my feelings out there, because you know what? If you don't you're going to miss so much."

Emma was silent.

"Hey," Sam said, smiling. "It's not as bad as you think…the whole 'talking it out' thing. Yeah, I like to avoid it when I can, but it has some pretty nice results."

"So you think him and I could be, you know, a-a couple?" Emma asked softly, staring down at her lap.

"Well Emma, I'm not the one who gets to decide that," Sam said. "That's between you two. But if you don't even try, you'll spend the rest of your life wondering what could've happened."

Emma nodded. "Okay…maybe-maybe I _won't _try and pretend that it didn't happen."

Sam patted her shoulder. "There you go, kid." She got to her feet. "Well, I'm gonna get to bed. I'll leave you alone, you know, to figure out what you'll say."

"Thanks," Emma said, smiling at her. "Oh, and mom? If I'm gonna do this, take Ashton to Canada for the day, will you? Otherwise she'll probably try to be right at my side during the whole thing."

Sam chuckled. "Yeah, I'll keep her out of your hair for you."


	309. Chapter 309

_Horoscope_

"Hey! Guess what?" Spencer said brightly, walking out of his bedroom.

"What?" Carly asked, looking up the show her and Sam were watching on T.V.

"I'm gonna go out and buy a hundred bucks worth of scratch off lotto tickets."

"Um…why?" Sam frowned. "You're like, the most _un_lucky person in the world."

"True," Spencer said. "But while I was reading my horoscope in the bathtub with a liter of Mountain Fizz-"

"That was my Mountain Fizz!" Carly exclaimed.

"That's not important," Spencer said dismissively. "Anyway, my horoscope said that I was gonna strike it big today. That _has _to mean I'm gonna win the lotto."

"Spencer," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Come on, you can't really believe that. Horoscopes aren't real."

"You didn't seem to think that last month when your horoscope told you that a tall, mysterious boy was going to fall in love with you," Sam grinned.

"And one _didn't_," Carly pointed out. "I stayed lonely the whole month! Which proves my point that those things are just a load of garbage!"

"Don't be a downer!" Spencer snapped, grabbing his wallet from the counter. "Or _someone _won't get her share of my millions!"

"Hey, just a fair warning, if you _do _win the lotto, my mom's gonna probably come by and start flirting with you," Sam told him. "She keeps track of all the local lottery winners."

"Ew," Spencer cringed.

"Well, while you're out buying your tickets, can you at least pick up some food to cook for dinner?" Carly chuckled. "I'm sick of ordering take-out."

"Yeah, sure, no problem," Spencer said, heading towards the door. "Although, when we're filthy rich, we'll have our own personal chef to make us our dinner!"

"And if that happens I'm moving in permanently," Sam said.

"Don't see how that will be any different," Spencer shrugged, opening the front door. "Oh, hey Fredo!"

"Hey," Freddie said, walking into the apartment as Spencer left.

"Baby, come watch this new _Girly cow _with us," Sam told her boyfriend. "Girly Cow's about to get a really big tax refund and buy the sun!"

"Cool," Freddie said, sitting down next to her and giving her a quick kiss.

Sam frowned and leaned closer to him, sniffing his neck. "Hey, why do you smell weird?"

"Um…it's-it's a new cologne," Freddie said quickly.

"What _kind _of cologne?" Carly frowned.

"Oh, um, just-just this new one my mom bought for me," Freddie mumbled.

"What kind did she buy you?" Sam asked.

Freddie sighed. "Tick Away Cologne for young men."

"Oh my God," Sam said, bursting out laughing.

"It's not funny!" Freddie said indignantly.

"It's a little funny," Carly smiled.

"Your mom's still on this tick kick?" Sam asked, pulling herself together. "Man, what a nut!"

"Sam," Carly said. "You really shouldn't talk about your boyfriend's mom like that."

"Don't waste your breath, Carls," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "I've tried so many times to get her to like my mom…it's useless."

"Well can you blame me?" Sam asked. "She hates me too!"

"She does not hate you," Freddie said. "She just…she doesn't-she's just not the biggest fan of the idea of any girl spending more time with me than her."

"Whatever, she's still a crazy lady who needs to have her head examined," Sam said, getting to her feet.

"Where are you going?" Carly asked.

"Home," Sam said. "I feel sort of out of it. I'm gonna go take a nap."

"Aright, well you're still coming over tonight to work on our English project?" Carly asked. "Freddie and I will start writing the report, and then you can handle the display."

"Yeah, sure," Sam nodded. She gave Freddie a short kiss. "Later!"

….

"Unbelievable!" Spencer said, angrily throwing down the quarter he was using to scratch off his lotto tickets. "One hundred bucks of scratch off lotto tickets and I don't win a dang thing!"

"I told you those things were a rip off," Freddie said, looking up from the computer where him and Carly were working on their English report.

"I told you they were a rip off," Spencer mimicked bitterly.

"Well did you at least pick up something to cook for dinner like I asked?" Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Um…I bought some chicken," Spencer said.

"Oh, yum," Carly smiled.

"But then I gave it to this lonely looking and _really _attractive girl at the bus stop," Spencer finished.

"What?"

"I thought if I gave her my chicken she'd go out with me!" Spencer defended.

"Well did she?" Freddie asked.

Spencer looked down. "No."

"Well, looks like another night of Chinese food," Carly sighed.

"Hey, tomorrow I'll cook," Spencer promised. "So, what are you teens doing?"  
"Writing the report for this English project Sam, Carly and I are working on," Freddie explained. "We had to read a book, and the write a ten page report on it and make a visual representation of a scene from it."

"Cool, so what book did you guys read?"

"_Lord of the Flies_," Carly replied.

"Oh, the one about the flies?" Spencer nodded.

"No, there aren't flies in it," Carly told him. "See, it's just-"

"Freddie!" Marissa Benson said, letting herself into the Shay's apartment.

"Um, hi mom," Freddie frowned.

"Freddie, good news," Marissa said. "My friend Lisa just told me that her daughter is single again!"

"Mom," Freddie sighed. "For the millionth time, I'm perfectly happy seeing my _girlfriend_, Sam. I don't need you hooking me up with other girls."

"But Herberta is a lovely girl! Not like that…_Sam Puckett_," Marissa said, cringing as she said her son's girlfriend's name.

"Mom! Please, I hate it when you talk about Sam that way," Freddie said. "And I'm not dating any Herberta or any other girl except for Sam."

"Ah!" Marissa screamed in defeat, running back across the hall.

"Wow, must be tough having a girlfriend who hates your mom and a mom who hates your girlfriend," Spencer commented.

"They don't _hate_-Oh, whatever, yeah they do," Freddie sighed. "I just wish they'd get along a little better and realize how much the other means to me."

"Eh, it will all work out," Carly told him, patting his shoulder. "Anyway, back to this whole symbolism thing…I'm really confused about-"

Just then the apartment door opened again and Sam came in, dragging her feet. She looked awful; her hair was a mess, her clothes were all wrinkled and her face was pale and sweaty.

"Whoa, Sam!" Carly exclaimed as Freddie rushed over to her. "What's wrong?"

"I don't know, I think I'm sick," Sam moaned as Freddie helped her over to the couch.

"Baby, I think you have a fever," Freddie said, his face etched with concern as his girlfriend leaned back in the couch, clearly in a lot of pain.

"Here," Spencer said, running over with a thermometer. "Take her temperature."

Freddie did, and when the instrument was done reading, he looked at the digital screen.

"Okay, you have a fever of 105.2," Freddie said, his eyes widening. "That's _dangerously _high."

"Here," Carly said, running over with a bottle of cold water. "Drink this."

Sam began to take a sip, but nearly gagged the second the water touched her lips.

"Ow!" she cried, grabbing her side. "Ow, ow, ow!"

"What's wrong? What hurts?" Freddie asked.

"My side, it feels like it's on fire," Sam winced.

Carly, Spencer and Freddie exchanged concerned glances. They knew Sam had a _very _high pain tolerance, and the fact that whatever she had was causing actual _tears _to come from her eyes was very unsettling.

"Freddie," Carly said. "Go get your mom. She's a nurse, she might be able to help."

"No," Sam moaned, still wincing in pain.

"Sam, you're really sick!" Carly said. She looked back at Freddie. "Go get her."

"Right," Freddie nodded.

"I'll call your mom, Sam," Spencer said, grabbing his pearphone.

"She's in Texas visiting Melanie," Sam mumbled.

"What's going on?" Marissa asked as her and Freddie returned.

"Sam's really sick," Freddie said, quickly going back to his girlfriend's side.

"She has a fever of 105 and she says her side is hurting a lot," Carly said.

"Let me see, let me see," Marissa said, sitting down on the edge of the coffee table.

Carly pushed up the corner of Sam's shirt to show her Sam's right side, which was very red.

"Ow!" Sam said indignantly as Carly's hand brushed across it.

"How long has your side been hurting you?" Marissa asked.

"I don't know…two days?" Sam replied.

"Wait, two days?" Freddie frowned. "Why didn't you say anything earlier?"

"I thought it was just those stupid stomach parasites again," Sam moaned.

"It's appendicitis," Marissa said. "And considering the high fever, how red her side is, and the fact that this has been going of for two days, I'd say her appendix is close to bursting. She needs to get to a hospital _now_."

"I'll call an ambulance," Spencer said.

"No, it'll be quicker to drive," Marissa said, pulling her car keys out of her pocket. "Come on, let's go."

"Alright," Freddie said as he gently picked Sam up bridal style as he, Carly and Spencer followed his mother out of the apartment.

…..

"Sam's mom is flying back to Seattle tonight," Carly said, hanging up her phone as the four sat in the hospital's waiting room.

"Man, how long does it take to remove an appendix?" Freddie said worriedly as he paced back and forth. "She's been in there for over two hours!"

"What happens if an appendix bursts?" Spencer asked.

"All the bacteria that was inside the appendix will have free range of the body," Marissa replied.

"Man, this is all my fault," Carly moaned. "Sam practically _lives _at my house! How could I not have known that she had appendicitis?"

"Are you all here for Samantha Puckett?" a doctor asked, coming into the waiting room.

"Yes," Freddie said, hurrying over. "Is she okay? Did her appendix burst?"

"Ms. Puckett is fine, we removed her appendix successfully," the doctor said. "But she was very lucky. Had she arrived even ten minutes later, it would've burst, and she'd be facing much worse problems."

"So can we see her?" Carly asked.

"Of course, she's up in room 229," the doctor nodded.

The party hurried up to Sam's room and burst into her room, where Sam was laying on a hospital bed wearing a white gown, holding a jar in her hands.

"Baby, you're okay, thank God," Freddie said, hurrying over and giving Sam a long kiss.

"Hey, move it, will you!" Carly said, throwing her arms around her best friend.

"How you doing, kid?" Spencer asked, giving Sam a hug as well.

"Eh, my side's sore, you know, from them cutting into it and everything," Sam shrugged. "But I feel a lot better than I did before. And look what I got!" she held up the jar. "It's my appendix! I get to keep it!"

"Ew!" Carly cringed.

"And look, when I shake it, it-"

"Okay, why don't we save that for later," Freddie said quickly. He kissed her again.

"Your mom's going to be here in a few hours," Carly told her.  
"Alright," Sam nodded.

"So do you have to stay here overnight?" Spencer asked.

"Yeah," Sam sighed. "Hopefully the food's decent here."

"Hey, I'll run to the vending machine later and try and smuggle you in some Fat Cakes," Carly promised.

"You're the best," Sam grinned. Then she turned to Freddie. "Hey, um…where's your mom?"

"Um, I think she's still down in the waiting room," Freddie told her.

"Oh," Sam said. "Well…do you think you could, you know, go get her?"

"Um, sure," Freddie nodded. "I'll be back in a second."

"Hey, you think I could go to the front desk here and ask for them to give me the files on the girl I accidently…ran over? She changed her number and moved after that whole misunderstanding."

"Um, I think you should probably move on from her," Carly said. "You know, to avoid winding up in prison or something."

"I didn't mean to run her over! I was just-Oh, hey Mrs. Benson," Spencer said as Freddie and his mom walked back into the room.

Sam stared at the woman, who was staring right back at her.

For almost a full minute, the room was absolutely silent.

"So, um," Sam finally said, clearing her throat. "Th-Thanks."

Marissa nodded. "You're welcome."

"Whoa, did that just happen?" Carly whispered to Freddie, who was absolutely beaming.

"Yeah," he said happily. "So beautiful."


	310. Chapter 310

**AN-So this is a sequel to chapter 294, where Sam talks to Carly about how she felt when Freddie said that she didn't care about him in iStill Psycho. **

…**.**

_Record_

Carly rolled out of bed the next morning and looked over at the love seat where Sam had been sleeping. As she had expected, Sam was gone, her blanket sloppily draped over the back of the couch.

Carly sighed. True, her and Sam were best friends, and told each other everything, but never in all their years of friendship has Sam cried real, genuine tears to her as she had done the previous night, and she figured Sam had probably gone back home and was trying to force her emotions down with a pack of extra-fat bacon.

She couldn't believe it…Sam was still in love with Freddie, and Freddie had just completely broken her heart with his words. Somehow, Carly would've always thought it would be the other way around.

And while Carly had gone through her fair share of breakups and had seen _way _too many sappy movie romances disintegrate, she couldn't even begin to imagine the pain that Sam must be going through right now…To have the boy who you told that you loved, and had said the same words to you, blatantly say what Freddie had said to her…it had to hurt.

Carly quickly dressed and headed downstairs, still immersed in her thoughts.

"Hey," Spencer greeted her as she began to pour herself a bowl of cereal. "Check out this new t-shirt I just made myself! It's scented! Whenever I wear this baby, I'm going to smell like marshmallow."

"Cool," Carly said, pulling on a strained smile.

"You okay?" Spencer frowned.

"Yeah," Carly sighed. "I'm fine."

"Okay, well, if you need to talk, I'll be in my room," Spencer said. "Sorting my slippers."

Carly had only taken a few bites of her cereal when the apartment door swung open and Freddie walked in.

"Hey," he said happily. "You sleep good, knowing crazy Nora and her deranged parents are locked up?"

"Yes," Carly said simply, trying not to glare at Freddie, who was so chipper while her best friend was at home, possibly crying her eyes out again.

"Hey, whose bacon is this?" Freddie asked, pointing to the large plate of bacon on the counter.

"Probably Spencer's," Carly shrugged.

"Oh, good," Freddie said, taking a piece. "I thought it was Sam's. Not really in the mood to get my hand gnawed off for touching her food."

Carly narrowed her eyes. "Sam's not here."

"Really? Figured she would've spent the night," Freddie said. "Oh well. Hey, is it cool if I-?"

"Sam _did _spend the night," Carly snapped. "She left before I got up this morning, though."

"Whoa, since when does _Sam _get up _early_?" Freddie chuckled.

"Well I'm guessing she didn't sleep too good last night," Carly said angrily. "Because _something _that _someone _said was probably keeping her up all night, tossing and turning!"

"Um, what?" Freddie frowned.

"Nothing," Carly sighed. She had probably said too much already; she knew Sam would never want her to tell Freddie that she cried over him last night. But then again, it was so hard to just stand by…

"But you-"

"I can't believe you said that!" Carly blurted out.

"Said what?" Freddie asked, confused.

"Oh you know what!"

"No," Freddie said. "I don't. What did I say?"

"The other morning…at Nora's house," Carly said, crossing her arms. "Think hard, Freddie."

"Um…is this about me being angry that you didn't stop Nora from kissing me?" Freddie asked.

"Nope."

"Well then can you give me a hint or something?" Freddie asked. "Because I really don't know what I said to you that made you so-"

"You didn't say it to _me_!"

"Well then who'd I say it to?"

"Sam!"

"What?" Freddie wrinkling his brow. "What'd I say to Sam?"

"Come on, Freddie, you shouldn't have to ask," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Seriously, will you tell me already?" Freddie asked. "Because I don't know what I said to Sam that was so-"

"You said she didn't care about you!"

"Huh?"

"You know, when we were trying to short out your tracker chip so your mom would find us," Carly sighed. "You said that you didn't want her shocking you the pen and you wanted to me to do it instead because _I _care about you."

"So?" Freddie shrugged. "It's true."

Carly glared at him. "Tell me you did _not _just say that."

"I did, and you know what, I'll say it again," Freddie said firmly. "Sam doesn't care about me. Come on, Carly, I think it's pretty obvious. She's constantly ripping on me, hitting me…the girl's not happy unless _I'm _miserable!"

"Freddie, you _know_ that's not true," Carly said. "And Sam does not make you miserable."

Freddie scoffed.

"I'm serious!" Carly said. "And unless you're completely out of it, then you should've noticed that Sam hasn't even been doing too much to you lately!"

"Yeah, because she's probably plotting something really bad," Freddie mumbled.

"No!" Carly said loudly. "Because whether you want to believe it or not, Sam _cares_ about you. Maybe _she _at least meant what she said in the elevator that night you two broke up."

Freddie's eyes widened. "You-You know about-"

"How you two said you loved each other?" Carly finished. "Yeah, I do. Can you at least tell me the truth about that, Freddie? Did you mean it when you told her that you loved her?"

"Look, this is completely irrelevant. What does it even-"

"Did you mean it or not?" Carly asked again forcefully.

"I-"

"Freddie!"

"Okay, fine, yes!" Freddie conceded. "I did mean it! But that doesn't even matter, alright? Because like I said, Sam _doesn't _care about me."

"Why do you keep saying that?" Carly asked, her voice softer. "Is it because you really believe it? Or…is it because maybe if you keep telling yourself that, it won't be so hard for you to deal with the fact that you still might have feelings for her?"  
Freddie sighed. "Wow…you're good."

"Well, yes," Carly agreed.

"I just thought it would be easier this way," Freddie said. "I mean, I know I told Sam that it wasn't good to just keep your feelings bottled up inside of you, but it's _so _much easier. Besides," he added sadly. "There's no way that Sam would ever want to get back together anyway, so the more I ignore my feelings for her, the better."

"Freddie," Carly said gently. "Last night…when Sam was telling me how upset she was that you had said what you did, she _cried_. She cried hard; worse than I've _ever_ seen. Because you really hurt her when you said she didn't care about you; because it's the complete opposite. Sam still loves you."  
Freddie's eyes widened. "W-What?"

"She still loves you," Carly repeated again. "And when the person that you love completely shrugs off your love for them…it's not pretty."

"Carly," Freddie said slowly. "Are you serious right now? Sam actually said that she still loved me?"  
Carly nodded. "She did."

"Oh man…" Freddie said, turning towards the door. "I got to go see her then! This means that-"

"Hey, not so fast," Carly said. "You can't just barge over there!"

"Why not?" Freddie demanded, exasperated. "You just said-"

"I know what I said," Carly cut him off. "Sam still loves you. But I told you, you really hurt her too. You need to tell her everything you just told me; set the record straight once and for all."

Freddie nodded. "And then do you think…do you think she'll get back together with me?"

Carly gave him a small smile. "Sam's stubborn," she said. "But for you…I think she'll hear you out."

…

Freddie knocked at Sam's door, trying to figure out how he would even begin this conversation. He wished he would've managed to convince Carly to tell him exactly what to say, but she insisted that he needed to do this on his own.

He knocked again, and this time Sam opened the door.

"Yeah? What do you want?" Sam asked, crossing her arms.

Freddie sighed. "Can I come in?"

Sam shrugged. "Whatever."

"Thanks," Freddie said, coming into the cluttered house. "So, um…your mom home?"

"Nope, she's out trying to find a new guy at the fishing docks," Sam replied.

Freddie nodded. He watched as Sam sat back down on her couch, and felt saddened as he realized that she was missing her usual…Samness. She seemed sort of out of it, but also trying to _hide _the fact that she was out of it at the same time. Had he really done that?

"So…what do you want?" Sam asked, not looking at him.

"Well, um…I-I kind of needed to talk to you," Freddie said, sitting down next to her.

"Why?" Sam frowned. "You know we have iCarly rehersal in like, three hours. You could just talk to me there."

"I-I kind of wanted to talk to you in private," Freddie told her.

Sam gave him a confused look. "Alright…"

Freddie took a deep breath. "Look, Sam…the other day at Nora's…I didn't mean that-that _thing _that I said to you…you know, that you-"

"That I didn't care about you?" Sam finished softly.

"Yeah," Freddie said, somewhat awkwardly. "That. I-I'm sorry. It was just, you know, a heat of the moment thing."

"Why would you think that?" Sam asked softly, not looking at him.

"I don't-"

"You really think after an entire month of us dating that I don't even care about you?" Sam said angrily, getting to her feet. "You think I _lied _to you when I told you I loved you? Was that just something you said in the heat of the moment too?"

"No!" Freddie said. "I did mean it! It's just…Sam, I-it's hard, okay! It's hard for me to have to hang around you every day and remind myself that I'm not supposed to feel _those feelings _for you anymore! So, I don't know…I figured if I just told myself over and over again that there was no way you'd ever feel the same way about me, I'd be able to move on and get past it. But it didn't work, okay?"

"Yeah, well how do you think I felt all those times, huh?" Sam exclaimed. "Having to hang around _you_, trying to be all 'normal' and everything only to have you not even notice!"

"Well I was trying to be all 'abnormal' and you didn't notice either!"

"Well you _sucked _at being abnormal!"

"And you sucked at being normal!"

"Oh yeah?" Sam snapped, stepping closer to him.

"Yeah!" Freddie said, stepping closer to her as well. "And you wanna know what else I suck at?"

"What?" Sam demanded.

"Trying to keep myself from doing _this_!" And with that he smashed his lips down onto hers. Sam snaked his arms around his neck at once, eagerly kissing him back.

It was quite some time before the two finally pulled away, panting and trying to catch their breath as two stared at each other in amazement at the event that had just taken place.

"Sam, I'm sorry I hurt you," Freddie said softly. "That-That was never what I wanted. I just wanted…_that_. And to be _us _again."

"Like…_couple _us again?" Sam asked.

Freddie nodded, somewhat nervously. "If you want that too."

Sam was silent for a minute. "Okay," she finally said. "But…you-you need to realize that I _do _care about you. And I never stopped. I don't want you to just always think of me as this heartless girlfriend who only wants you to buy me food. I mean, yes, I _obviously _want you to buy me food, but…I-I also really-"

"I know," Freddie nodded, pulling her close again. "And I'll never forget it."


	311. Chapter 311

**AN-So this request is actually a Sam&Cat request (obviously with Seddie, though). I know there are probably some people reading this that don't watch Sam & Cat so that's why I posted a high school chapter with this. Also, I don't think there's a Sam & Cat page up on here yet, otherwise I would've made this request a oneshot of its own on that page, since I sort of want to keep this story with just iCarly. So does anybody know if there **_**is **_**a Sam & Cat page up on Fanfiction yet? Because I actually enjoyed writing this, and I'll probably try to upload more there. In the meantime, if you guys have any other Seddie oriented Sam & Cat requests, I'll be happy to put them on here for you guys!**

**Anyway, in this oneshot, Freddie goes to L.A. after iGoodbye. Also, I've never written any Victorious stories, so I apologize if Cat's not in character. I really tried my best with her, and I'd love to know what you guys thought. **

…**..**

_Air_

Freddie tapped his foot impatiently as he stood by Sam and what used to be Carly's lockers. One week had passed since Carly had spontaneously moved to Italy, and this was the fifth day of school that Sam had been absent. Their first day back, Freddie hadn't expected anything less; he himself had trouble dragging his feet from Bushwell Plaza to Ridgeway without making his usual stop across the hall to meet Carly and help her help Spencer put out his latest fire. But now Freddie was beginning to get a little concerned…He pulled out his phone and dialed Sam's number for what seemed like the millionth time the past few days. And also for the millionth time, he got her voicemail. Letting out a groan of frustration, Freddie began leaving his message. "Sam! Where the heck are you? You haven't been at school for a whole week! Answer your phone, will you? Come on, if you don't get back to your classes soon, you won't even graduate!" And with that he hung up and shoved his phone back into his pocket.

"Hey," Gibby said, greeting Freddie as he joined them. "Guess what Weasel learned to do last night? If I put him in a cereal box and put just a dollop of jelly on my-"

"Gib, have you heard from Sam yet?" Freddie asked, cutting him off.

"No," Gibby frowned. "She didn't come to school today either?"

"Nope," he sighed.

"Well she's probably still bummed about Carly leaving," Gibby reasoned.

"Yeah, so are we, but we're still here, aren't we?" Freddie pointed out. "I know her and Carly were practically sisters, but she can't just stay locked up in her house all day; that can't be good for her!"

"I tried locking myself in my house for a whole day," Gibby said. "But I think my cat was having a 'lady friend' over, so I ended up leaving after a couple of hours."

"I'm gonna go stop by her place after school," Freddie said, ignoring Gibby's last comment. "I'll try talking to her…hopefully that will get us somewhere. Either that or I'll get my face pounded in."

….

Freddie pounded on Sam's door for the fifth time. "Sam!" he called again. "Sam, it's me! Will you open the door?"

But there was no response, and Freddie's knuckles were beginning to get sore. So figuring he had no other choice, Freddie waded through the uncut grass and mountains of weeds to the window on the side of the house that he knew was Sam's bedroom window. He peered into the room through the dirty glass, expecting to see Sam laying on her bed, shoveling some sort of meat snack into her mouth.

But the room was empty; no Sam in sight.

_Okay_, he said to himself, frowning. _This is weird…where else would she be if she's not here? _

Maybe she went out for a snack; he _did _know for a fact that her mom was infamous for getting banned from grocery stores.

_I guess I can just wait out on the front step for her_, he thought, heading back to the front of the house. _Or maybe her mom will come home and then I can ask her what's-_

"Hey! Hey you!" a voice suddenly shouted, jerking Freddie out of his thoughts. He turned and saw an elderly lady, wielding a bottle of air freshener, starting towards him from the house next door. "What do you think you're doing snooping around people homes huh?"

"I'm not snooping!" Freddie said quickly. "I-I'm looking for a friend of mine who lives here. Sam Puckett, you know her?"

"Oh yeah, I know her," the lady said, lowing her air freshener.

"Listen, do you have any idea where she is right now?" Freddie asked. "Do you know if she ran out for a little bit or something?"

"I don't think she's here, I haven't seen her in a week."

"A-A week?" Freddie frowned.

"Yes…the last time I saw her was late one night last week when I was putting my cat out…she was leaving on some motorcycle and I haven't seen her since," the lady said.

"Well what-what about her mom?" Freddie asked.

"Pam Puckett?" the lady scoffed. "Please, she's probably off in Vegas getting hitched for the ninth time this year."

"Right…" Freddie said weakly. "T-Thanks."

Where _was_ Sam? Freddie thought miserably as he walked away from the house. Not even her neighbor had seen her in a week? He really hoped she hasn't done anything stupid…

…..

"Wait, wait, wait," Spencer said later that evening. "No one's seen her for a _week_? And I'm _just _hearing about this?"

Freddie sighed. He felt somewhat guilty that since Carly left, he really hadn't made it a point to come over to the Shay's apartment anymore. But right now, he really needed to talk to someone.

"I-I figured that she was just really depressed about Carly," Freddie said. "I didn't know she had gone AWOL!"

"I'm calling the cops," Spencer said, pulling his phone out of his pocket.

"Hold on," Freddie said quickly. "Carly!"

"What do you mean?" Spencer asked.

"I mean, different continents or not, Carly's still her best friend," Freddie said. "Carly would know what Sam's doing. We got to talk to her!"

"On it," Spencer said, quickly pulling up a chat window on the computer on the counter. He quickly typed in Carly's username and in a few seconds a very tired looking Carly appeared on the screen.

"You guys, not that I'm not happy to see you all," she yawned. "But it's sort of three in the morning here."

"This is important, Carls," Freddie said urgently.

"What's wrong?" Carly asked, waking up. "Is everyone alright?"

"Er…that's sort of what we wanted to ask you," Freddie said. "Have-Have you heard from Sam?"

"Sam?" Carly frowned. "Of course. I talked to her yesterday. We web chatted."

"And she was safe?" Spencer asked.

"I-I assume so," Carly said, confused. "You guys are starting to freak me out…what's going on? Why isn't Sam there with you guys?"

"Because Sam's not here," Freddie told her. "I think-I think she might have left Seattle."

"What?" Carly exclaimed. "That-That's ridiculous! I _told _you guys, I talked to her yesterday."

"Did she say where she was?"

"Well…no, but that's because…I just thought-Why do you think she left Seattle?"

"Because," Freddie replied. "She hasn't been at school for a whole week-"

"Wait…" Carly said slowly. "I _asked _her how school was going. She told me it was going fine. She said that she filled Mr. Howard's desk drawer with worker ants and that the cafeteria went back to serving two percent milk instead of whole."

"Carly…she-that was a lie," Freddie said. "No one around here has seen her since you left. I went by her house today and her neighbor said the night that you left for Italy, she saw Sam getting on her motorcycle, ride off, and she never came back."

"But why would she lie to me?" Carly asked, slightly hurt.

"She-She probably didn't want to worry you," Spencer said.

"Well I'm worried now!" Carly exclaimed. "I'm calling her right now!"

Spencer and Freddie saw her grab her Pearphone and quickly dial Sam's number. After a moment she threw it down. "No answer!"

"Wait a minute!" Freddie said. "Ah! I'm so stupid!"

"What, what?" Carly asked anxiously.

"I can track Sam's phone like I did when she was in that mental hospital!" Freddie said, quickly pulling up the site he could use to find Sam's location. "I need Sam's password, Carly!"

"Okay, but it's gross, remember," Carly said. "It's…zit pus. One word."

"Ew," Spencer cringed.

"Okay," Freddie said, typing in the password. "It's tracking!"

"Where is she?" Carly asked.

"Hold on, it's loading…" Freddie said. "Okay! Sam is in…L.A?"

"L.A?" Spencer repeated. "What's she doing in L.A? Does she have family down there or something?"

"No, she doesn't know anyone there," Carly said. "What-What could she possibly be doing there?"

"I don't know," Freddie sighed. "Anyway, Carls, I'm sorry to wake you up like this. But now that we at least know where Sam is and that she's safe, you should probably get back to sleep. We'll try and figure everything out over here."

"You keep me posted on everything," Carly said firmly.

"Night kid," Spencer said, closing the window.

"So now what do we do?" Freddie asked. "Sam just all of the sudden decided to move to California without even telling anyone? Why?"

"Maybe…Maybe Carly leaving affected her more than we realized," Spencer suggested.

"But still," Freddie said softly. "She didn't even say goodbye?"

Spencer patted his shoulder. "Hey…did that tracker thing give you an exact location for Sam?"

"Yeah, she's at some apartment complex," Freddie mumbled. "Why?"

"Well…I think you should go see her," Spencer said.

"W-What?"

"Go see her," Spencer repeated. "Look…if you don't, you're just going to keep wondering what happened. So will I. And Carly. But mostly you…because, well…you know."

"You know?"

"You know," Spencer said again, giving him a knowing smile. "Come on, Freddie, I don't practically house two teens for six years and not know when there's something going on between them."

"I-You-Well how am I even supposed to get to L.A?" Freddie asked. "I don't have a car!"

"Socko's sister's boyfriend can hook you up with a bus ticket," Spencer said, pulling out his phone. He quickly dialed and number. "Hey Socks, I-No, no I _told _you, the doctor told me to stop putting those there! Anyway, I need a favor from Buster…yeah, can he hook a friend of mine up with a two-way ticket to L.A? He can? Great! Thanks! See you, buddy."

"So…I'm all set then?" Freddie asked.

"Yup, I'll drive you to the bus station," Spencer said. "Oh wait! Your mom!"

"Don't worry about it, she left this morning to help her sister, Susan, with some fungus infection," Freddie said quickly. "Now come on!"

….

"Okay, here you are kid…" the bus driver said to Freddie as he pulled up in front of an apartment complex; the apartment complex where he had tracked Sam's phone to. "So I'm picking you up here tomorrow afternoon at two, got it?"

"Yeah, thanks," Freddie said, stepping out onto the pavement.

The bus driver gave him a short nod, took another bite of the melon he had been eating, and then drove off.

"Okay, Sam," Freddie mumbled as he began walking through the complex, which, he had to admit, was very nice, until he reached the door where it had showed Sam's phone to be in earlier; apartment 22.

He knocked at once, just as he heard a crash from inside. Yup…Sam Puckett was definitely nearby.

A moment later the door opened, but to his surprise, it wasn't Sam that was standing in front of him. It was a short girl with bright red hair who looked vaguely familiar to Freddie, though he couldn't quite recall where he might've seen her before.

"Um, hi," he said. "I-I-"

"Hey! You're that kid from iCarly!" the girl said.

"Oh, yeah," Freddie nodded.

The girl giggled. "You're geeky."

"Thanks…" Freddie frowned. "Look, I-I'm looking for Sam Puckett. Is she in here? I traced her phone to this apartment and-"

"No!" the girl suddenly screamed. "You aren't allowed in here! Sam said I'm not allowed to let Freddie from iCarly in here _ever_!"

"So Sam is here then?" Freddie said. "Just-Just let me see her and-"

"No, Sam will be mad at me," the girl said. She picked up a pad of paper from the table by the door. "See? She made me a list of what I'm supposed to ever to in case Freddie Benson, the tech nerd from iCarly, ever comes to this door."

"She made a _list_?"

"Yeah, and then I made a list of my favorite types of laundry detergents," the girl nodded, smiling brightly at him. "And I took it to my Nona over at Elderly Acres, but then she asked me if I had been sniffing any more Beiber hair and then went to go play paintball with her new boyfriend with a chicken leg tattoo."

"Oh..kay," Freddie said, slightly taken aback. "Anyway…I really need to see Sam, so if you could just-"

"No! I have to listen to the list!" she cried loudly. "See? It says 'First, don't tell him about this list'…oh."

"But I need to-"

"'Second'," the girl continued. "'Slam the door in his face'."

"No, no!" Freddie said. "Please! I-"

But it was too late. Giggling, the redheaded girl shut the door right in his face.

Feeling defeated, Freddie slowly slid down against the wall next to the door. But just then, he heard a voice…A voice he hadn't heard in a whole week.

"Quit it, will you? I bought you guys all the stupid bubbles in the store, so stop playing with my hair already!"

"But we want to make you a princess!" a young girls voice said.

"Yeah! A princess!" another young girl said.

"Unless you invent a country named Meatland, where all the trees are made of ham and it rains bacon grease, then I'm not being any princess," Sam said firmly, turning the corner towards her apartment door. She was carrying a large bag in one hand and a baby in the other, and two girls who didn't look much older than seven were trailing behind her.

Freddie jumped up, hardly daring to believe his eyes. "Sam?"

Sam nearly tripped as she caught sight of Freddie. Her eyes widened and she looked as if she had just been slapped. "You-what-what are you doing here?"

"What am _I _doing here?" Freddie said, crossing his arms. "What are _you_ doing here?"

"Ohhhh," one of the girls said, pulling at Sam's arm, grinning. "Is he your _boyfriend_ Sam?"

"He can be your prince!" the other girl said.

"And who are they?" Freddie asked, pointing at the three kids.

"I'm…babysitting them," Sam mumbled.

"_Babysitting_?" Freddie repeated. "As in willingly looking after _children_?"

"Wow, good to know you know the definition of the word," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "You still haven't answered my question…what are you doing here?"

"Looking for you!" he exclaimed. "And you never answered me either! Why the heck are you in L.A?"

Just then the door opened and the red headed girl walked out.

"Sam! I thought I heard you! I-" she looked over at Freddie a let out a small squeal. "I _told _you!" she hissed. "The list told you to leave!"

"You _told _him about that?" Sam said. "Cat!"

"I'm sorry! I'm not good with lists okay!" the girl, whose name was apparently Cat, said, clutching her head.

"Hey Cat?" one of the girls asked. "Can you tell Sam to let us make her a princess?"

"Or," Sam said quickly, handing the baby to Cat. "You and Kelly can go inside and make _Cat _a princess. Yeah, doesn't _that _sound fun?"

"Oh! I wanna be a princess!" Cat smiled happily. "One time me and my brother were playing castle, and I wanted to be the princess, but he wanted to be the princess too, and then he bit me and my parents had to put special medicine on my cut because they said my brother was 'infected'."

Freddie gave her a strange look, but Sam just rolled her eyes. "Awesome…just take them inside, will you?"

"Kay kay," she said brightly, leading the girls into the house.

Sam turned back to Freddie.

"I'm still waiting for an answer," Freddie said staring at her. "Why'd you leave?"

Sam shrugged. "Why should I have stayed? Without Carly and doing iCarly…what else did I really have in Seattle? So after Carly left, I got on my motorcycle and just…rode. And then I wound up in L.A, bought a breakfast burrito, almost got crushed by a garbage truck, hijacked a limo and here I am."

"What do you mean you didn't have anything in Seattle?" Freddie asked. "You had Spencer and Gibby and-and me."

"Yeah…I know," Sam sighed. "It's just…things were going to be different. I don't like change…"

"So you go and make the biggest change ever by moving here?"

"Well at least here I can completely start over," Sam said. "If I stayed in Seattle it would be you and Gib hanging out all the time while Spencer would probably start finding actual adult friends since he wouldn't be taking care of Carly anymore. That would just leave me…"

"Sam, that's not true!" Freddie said. "Do you have any idea how worried we've been about you? Spencer was ready to call the cops when he found out you were gone!"

"Look, I never said I didn't miss Seattle," Sam said. "I do. I miss Spencer and Gibby and even you occasionally. Last night my laptop was acting all wonky so I actually had to pay a dude to fix it instead of forcing you to just do it."

Freddie couldn't help but show a small smile.

"But anyway," Sam continued. "I'm not leaving. I'm staying here."

"Sam, come on, you can't do that," Freddie said. "What about your mom?"

"She knows I'm here," Sam shrugged. "I called her the second night I was here, told her I had a place to live, had a way to make money…she's totally cool with it."

"Well what about school?" Freddie reasoned. "You need to come back to Ridgeway and graduate at least."

"I will graduate, I'm doing my classes online now," Sam said.

"But-there's no way you can support yourself by just babysitting!" Freddie argued. "You can't possibly be paying for this place, plus paying for food, utilities and all that other stuff!"

"Cat's Nona already paid this place off, so we don't have to pay rent," Sam said. "And the people around here are _loaded_. You know how much Cat and I are getting paid to watch those three kids in there? A hundred bucks. And that's just for today. We babysit them twice a week. Plus we have a bunch more kids we watch, so we can afford food and all that. I mean, come on, you don't really think I'd let myself starve, do you?"

"But-But you can't be a babysitter," Freddie said.

"Why not?"

"Because you're _terrible _with children!" he exclaimed. "Don't you remember when we were making those Penny T's? You scarred those poor kids for life!"

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? Follow me, Freddison." She opened the door led Freddie into the apartment, where the two girls were braiding Cat's hair into about six different parts.

"Look at me!" Cat said happily. "I'm a princess! I'm-" she gasped. "Sam! Don't look behind you, but Freddie is t-h-e-r-e."

"Yeah, I know," Sam said. "Since a certain someone can't follow a list of instructions!"

"I hope she doesn't mean me," she whispered to the baby sitting on her lap.

"Anyway," Sam said, turning the two girls. "Kelly, Kaylee? If you had to rate me as a babysitter on a scale from one to ten, ten being the best, what would you give me?"

"A gazillion!" Kelly exclaimed.

"A gazillion times gazillion!" Kaylee said. "You're the best babysitter ever!"

"See?" Sam said smugly to Freddie. "I'm the best. So now that that's cleared up…bye! Thanks for stopping by!"

"Wait, Sam!" Cat said. "You can't just throw him out on the streets. Geeks can't survive on the street!"

"The nub's probably got a hotel or something," Sam shrugged.

"Er…no, I don't actually," Freddie said, realizing it just as he said it.

"You came to L.A. and didn't even get a room?" Sam frowned. "Dude! How stupid can you get?"

"I'm sorry, when I was rushing to L.A. spur of the moment, I was a little too preoccupied about getting _you _back home!" Freddie snapped.

"Why doesn't he stay with us?" Cat suggested.

"Because I don't even have a real bed, I sleep on the couch!" Sam said. "Where the heck would he even sleep?"

"My Nona has camp beds in our storage unit," Cat replied. "He could use one of those."

"Fine, whatever," Sam conceded.

"Thank you," Freddie said.

The two little girls whispered something to each other and began to snicker.

"What?" Sam asked.

"Kelly thinks he's cute," Kaylee said.

Sam looked at Freddie. "Well Kelly must have something wrong with her eyes then."

….

Later that evening, while Cat was off dropping the kids off, Sam was making herself a bowl of ice cream. Freddie was sitting on the couch, watching her.

"So…" he said slowly. "You-You really aren't coming back to Seattle?"

Sam shrugged. "I dunno…someday, maybe. But right now, I think I'm doing better here."

"Yeah, well," Freddie sighed. "I guess there's no arguing there. You have a job, you're still in school, this place is a lot nicer than your old house…no offense. It's just not really Seattle without you, though."

Sam gave a small smile. "I really did mean it when I said I missed everyone…and hey, California's not _quite _as far away as Italy…I can visit you all. Or you can come down here."

"Definitely," Freddie nodded. But he was still trying to wrap his mind around the fact that in twelve hours he would be heading back to Seattle without Sam. It made him feel…empty. But he didn't really think there was too much he could do. Sam seemed happy here.

"So you like living here with that Cat girl?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah, Cat's cool," Sam nodded. "It is sort of weird though, sometimes."

"How?"

"Well, you know how when I would hang out with Carly, _she'd _be the responsible one who made sure I didn't do stupid things?" Sam asked. "Well with Cat…_I'm _the one keeping _her _from doing stupid things."

"Shut up," Freddie laughed. "I can't believe that."

"It's true," Sam smirked.

"Sam!" Cat said, walking back into the apartment right on cue. "Sam! Sam! Sam! Guess what? After I dropped the kids back off, I was walking back here, and I saw this man, and he sneezed and dropped his gum, and I looked down at it and it was shaped like a heart! See!" she pulled out a small wad of gum from her pocket. "Isn't it pretty?"

"Okay, point taken," Freddie said, cringing.

"Just throw that out!" Sam said. "I think there's a tooth in it…And I'm hungry."

"We could get our free cheeseburgers from Inside-Out-Burger," Cat said.

"Free cheeseburgers?" Freddie repeated.

"We saved a sweaty dude," Sam explained quickly. She pulled out the keys to her motorcycle and tossed them to the redhead. "Here, go get us some. And be careful with my bike! And don't put anymore stupid unicorn stickers on it!"

Freddie walked over and sat down at the counter with Sam. "So is Cat the only person you've met here so far?"

"There's a dude named Dice that lives in the complex," Sam replied. "He's pretty cool."

"Oh…" Freddie said. _A guy? There's even another __**guy **__here? Well that's just perfect! _"So is he like, you know, into the same things you are?" Freddie asked, trying to keep things casual. "You hang out with him a lot?"

"He's over here almost every day," Sam shrugged. "And I guess he likes some of the same things as me…but I mean he's twelve, so…"

"He's twelve?" Freddie repeated, relief flooding his body. "Thank God-I mean…cool."

Sam rolled her eyes as she continued to eat her ice cream.

Suddenly, after that scare, Freddie couldn't take it anymore. "So does this mean…does this mean that we're like, officially over?"

Sam gave him a weird look. "I thought we just said we'd keep in touch."

"I know, but that's not what I meant," Freddie said bravely. "I mean…are _we_ done. You know, in a couple sense?"

Sam chuckled. "Um…wasn't that done and over almost two years ago in an elevator?"

"But we said we'd try again…" Freddie said, looking down at his lap. "Didn't we?"

"Well…yeah, we did," Sam said slowly. "But…that was two years ago."

"So you never wanted to give it another try?"

"Who said _I _didn't?" Sam said softly.

"What?" Freddie frowned.

"Freddie," Sam sighed. "You wanna know one of the main reasons I just left for L.A. out of the blue the night Carly left without even telling anyone?"

"Um…because your best friend just left?"

"That wasn't the whole reason," Sam said. "I-I saw you two."

"Two what?" Freddie asked.

"I saw you and Carly, okay?" Sam exclaimed. "Kissing. In the studio. Spencer had told me you were up there, and I thought you were alone putting away your camera stuff like you had said you would do, and-and I wanted talk to you, so I went up there and…there you were."

"She kissed me!" Freddie said quickly.

"You don't need to defend yourself," Sam mumbled. "You didn't _do _anything wrong…I mean, you _have _been in love with Carly since you were like, eleven, right?"

"That kiss, Sam," Freddie said. "It wasn't a real kiss. Carly and I-it was just sort of like a goodbye thing. Carly means a lot to me, because she's been like a sister to me almost my whole life, and we both care for each other…but that kiss was _not _romantic. It was two friends saying goodbye. That's all she meant it to be, and that's all I took it as. And anyway…yeah, I loved Carly when I was a kid, but that doesn't mean I'm _still _in love with her. I'm not."

"Oh," Sam said lamely.

There was a silence between the two.

"So," Freddie said, clearing his throat. "What-What did you want to talk to me about?"

"What?"

"You said that you were coming up to the studio that night to talk to me," he said. "What did you want to say?"

"It doesn't matter now," Sam shrugged.

"Sam…come on," Freddie said. "Please?"

"Fine," Sam sighed. "I was just-I was just going to ask you about what you said to me on the phone earlier that day…about why you asked me all of the sudden if I wanted to get back together."

Freddie blinked. "Why I asked?"

"Yeah, you asked," Sam said. "And then you changed the subject…"

Freddie took a deep breath. "I already told you, Sam…I had always thought we agreed that we'd give us another shot someday."

Sam stared at him. "So you were serious then? You-You were really asking?"  
Freddie nodded, and he could feel his cheeks flushing. "I had actually been wanting to ask you that for awhile…but things had been pretty hectic. We had to make that impromptu trip to Vegas to bail your mom out of jail, you lost your laptop…when you called, I had been sort of thinking about when I would possibly get a chance, so I-I just asked. But then when I realized how stupid I sounded, I chickened out."

Sam didn't reply.

Figuring her had nothing left to lose, Freddie opened his mouth again. "So…now that you know I actually meant what I said then…you-you want to tell me what your answer would've been?"  
Sam took a deep breath. "It-It would've been yes."

Freddie jerked his head up. "Yes?"

Sam nodded. "I always thought we'd give each other another chance too, someday," she admitted. "But…you know, all that time passed and nothing had happened…"

"Sam, you should've talked to me!" Freddie exclaimed. "You know how clueless I am with those things!"

"Me? I almost had a nervous breakdown the first time we went out from trying to figure out what to do!" Sam retorted. "Besides, aren't you the guy?"

"So _I _had to make the first move?"

"I did it last time!"

"And it worked, didn't it?"

"I wound up in a mental hospital!"

Freddie was about to argue back, but then, suddenly, he began to laugh.

"What?" Sam frowned.

"We're both being ridiculous here," Freddie smiled. "Arguing about who should've made the first move…"

"Seems like a pretty typical fight for us," Sam said, smirking.

Freddie moved a bit closer to her. "So…now that we've established that we both want to get back together…what do we do?"

Sam's smile disappeared. "I'm still not going back to Seattle. I-I _do _still like you," she added quickly. "But-But I just can't leave now. I can't leave Cat alone; we have about ten kids a week we babysit for."

Freddie nodded. "Yeah…I know."

Sam sighed. "I wish-I wish we could've had this big revelation sooner…then I wouldn't be in L.A. while you're in Seattle."

"Yeah, same," Freddie said. "But, you know what? It's stupid for us to just ignore what just happened…"  
"So then what?" Sam asked. "Are _you _going to move to L.A.?"

"As much as I would probably enjoy that," Freddie chuckled. "I think my mom would _literally _come down here and carry me home."

"Yeah, probably," Sam nodded. "She _is _psychotic. Well then what else is there? Long-distance?"

"It could work," Freddie said. "I mean…apparently Spencer's able to hook me up with free bus tickets."

"We have the Internet," Sam added thoughtfully.

"You have your motorcycle," Freddie said.

"Yeah…" Sam nodded. "This could work…"

"So…" Freddie said. "Did-Did we just get back together?"

"Feels like it," Sam grinned.

"And it was a mutual decision, right?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "But I'm still telling people that you came back to me begging."

Freddie chuckled. "Fair enough."

The two looked down at their hands, which were nearly touching on top of the counter.

"I love you," Freddie said, looking right into her blue eyes. He saw her cheeks redden.

"I love you too," Sam whispered.

The new couple stared at each other for a moment, soaking the other in, before Sam finally began to lean and kissed Freddie, which he happily responded to.

But just then they heard the front door open and they quickly pulled away.

"Cheeseburgers for everyone!" Cat said, jumping into the apartment, holding a large bag over her head.

"Um, hey Cat?" Sam said. "Can you turn around?"

"Oh, I love turning!" Cat said cheerfully as she turned around so that her back was facing Sam and Freddie. "When can I turn back around again? Sam? Sam! You can't leave me like this!"

But Sam was already preoccupied again as her and Freddie quickly entered another lip lock.


	312. Chapter 312

_Staircase_

"Good morning!" Carly said brightly, coming down the staircase.

"Wow!" Spencer said, looking up from his toast. "Someone's in a good mood."

"Indeed I am," Carly smiled. "Yearbooks come out today! And as editor, it's a very proud day for me."

"You were editor of the entire yearbook?" Spencer frowned. "You never told me that!"

"Well, I-I was editor of the clubs section," Carly said. "But hey! That's twelve pages of my work."

"Well congratz, kid," Spencer chuckled.

"Hey," Freddie said, letting himself in. "You ready to head to school?"

"Yeah, Sam just texted me and said she's down in the lobby," Carly said, grabbing her bag. "Aren't you excited?"

"Um, yeah…" Freddie frowned. "I've _really _been looking forward to my math test today for weeks."

"No! It's yearbook day!" Carly exclaimed. "Don't you remember? I'm _club editor_!"

"Oh, right," Freddie said, rolling his eye. "How could I forget?"

"Let's just go," Carly said, playfully swatting his shoulder.

…

"Okay, so here's the game plan," Carly said as the three teens entered Ridgeway. "Since I'm an editor, I can go into the yearbook storage room and get my yearbook and your yearbooks."

"I still can't believe I shoveled out fifty bucks for that thing," Sam said.

"Yes…" Carly said, shaking her head. "We'll pretend you paid with your own money. And anyway, this is your senior yearbook! You need to have something to remember it with!"

"Yeah, don't you want to look back at it in ten years and remember all the good times?" Freddie asked.

"Okay, all that I'm ever going to remember from this place is detentions every other day and mountains of homework that I never did," Sam said.

"Well I had to sell at least twenty yearbooks, so you helped me out," Carly said. "Even if the money _did _come out of my pocket. Anyway, wait here and I'll go get ours."

"I can't believe how many people bought those things," Sam said, opening her locker as she watched several students walking by with their noses in their yearbooks.

"Come on, it's not that crazy," Freddie said. "Besides, it's-"

"Hey, Sam, Freddie," one of their classmates said, passing by the two. "Congratulations!"

"Congratulations?" Freddie frowned as the classmate passed.

"Um…why'd we just get congratulated?" Sam asked.

"No clue," Freddie shrugged. "Anyway, did you come up with your five iCarly ideas? Remember, we're meeting after school today to start planning."

"Yes, nub," Sam said, pulling a wad of paper out of her pocket. "Got them right here."

"Well, you can go right ahead and cross out all of the ones that would cause me physical or emotional pain," Freddie said.

"Well then I don't have much of a list, Frebutt," Sam smirked.

"Hey you two, congratz on the big win!" another one of their classmates said, walking past them.

"Big win?" Sam repeated. "Um…did we win anything?"

"Not that I know of," Freddie said. "I'm sure he was just mistaken or something. But back to your list, will you stop trying to kill me live on the web!"

"That what kids want to see!" Sam argued.

"No it's not!"

"Well it's what I want to see," Sam shrugged. "And since _you're _just the tech producer-"

"Hey guys, you must be thrilled about winning," a third classmate said, walking by. "You guys totally had that one in the bag."

"Okay, what is going on?" Freddie demanded.

"I dunno, is the whole school crazy or something?" Sam said. "Why does everyone keep saying that we won something?"

"Hey you guys!" Carly said, running back over to her two friends. "Well, time for class. Why don't we all just head-"

"Hey, I thought you were picking up our yearbooks," Freddie pointed out.

"Oh, um, I-I thought we could just do that at lunch or after school," Carly said. "Or, you know, never."

"Never?" Sam frowned. "Why? I thought you were all pumped about them."

"Oh, I'm sure they're not as amazing as I built them up to be," Carly smiled, rolling her eyes. "So who's ready for class? I know I am. I'm so-"

"Hey, Sam, Freddie," a girl said, approaching the three. "I'm so glad you guys won and beat out Trisha Montgummery and Shawn Huntington, they're such jerks. And the head cheerleader dating the quarterback? Come on, that's a little overdone, don't you think?"

"Um, what are you-" Freddie started.

"Well by Maxine!" Carly said, quickly shooing the girl away.

"This is getting too weird," Sam said. "She's the fourth person who came up to Fredweiner and me and told us we won something."

"Yeah, do you know what's up?" Freddie asked.

"No," Carly said at once. "No, that-that's really strange, but right now I think we should get-"

"Carly," Sam said knowingly, crossing her arms. "What' going on?"

Carly sighed in defeat. "Okay," she conceded. "Better you guys find out from me than someone else." She unzipped her backpack and pulled out two yearbooks and handed one each to Sam and Freddie.

"Turn to page 18," she said. "And then you'll see…"

"Um, alright," Freddie frowned as him and Sam opened their yearbooks. "Senior Superlatives," he read. "Best Eyes, Madeline Chastely. Most Athletic: Norman Hinkle, Best Hair: Chelsea Mason, Best Couple-"

"Fredward Benson and Samantha Puckett?" Sam exclaimed, reading her own yearbook. "What?!"

"Wait, how could we have gotten best couple?" Freddie said. "We're not dating anymore!"

"I know," Carly said. "But they do the senior superlatives really far in advanced. They did these back when you _were _dating, and I guess they never got the memo that you two broke up, so they just kept it in there."

"Well," Sam said, slamming her yearbook closed. "That's just _fan-tastic_. Now on top of all the horribleness of high school, I'm going to have my picture in here with that forever!"

"Oh come on," Carly tried to reason. "It's not that bad-"

"Yeah?" Freddie retorted. "Like I want to have to explain to my future children why I dated that she-beast!"

"You guys-" Carly sighed.

"I'm out of here," Sam said, slamming her locker shut.

"Ditto!" Freddie snapped.

"No one says ditto anymore!" Sam sneered.

"I do!

"Well you're a nobody!"

"Well," Carly said as her friends stormed off. "So much for yearbook day."

…..

_Ten Years Later_

"Oh and look! There's Ms. Briggs!" Freddie laughed, looking down at his senior yearbook.

"Oh yeah, her and her big pointy boobs," Sam chuckled. "Man I hated her…Hey, there' you in the AV club…"

"And you in your after-school detention poker club," Freddie added, turning the page. "And hey, here are the superlatives."

"Ah yes," Sam grinned, looking down at her and Freddie's picture with the words 'Best Couple' under it. "The title that nearly gave us a heart attack when we saw it."

"I believe you said how horrible it was going to be to have your picture in here with me for the rest of your life," Freddie smirked.

"And I believe you were dreading having to tell your future kids about your she-beast of a high school girlfriend," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Wow," Freddie said, still staring down at the picture. "If our younger selves could see us now…I'd be eating my words, wouldn't I?" He put the yearbook right in front of his and Sam's one-year old son who was sitting on Sam's lap. "Look, buddy. That's your mommy and daddy when they were in high school."

"Ma! Da!" the infant squealed, looking down at the picture.

"That's right, baby," Sam smiled, kissing the top of his head. "See, mommy looks as hot as ever, but daddy's really let himself go, hasn't he?"

"Ha, ha," Freddie said, pulling his wife and son closer. He leaned down and kissed Sam. "We really were the best couple."

"Still are," Sam said, leaning against him as he wrapped his strong arms around her and their child.


	313. Chapter 313

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 295, where Freddie proposed to Sam. **

_Spiral_

"Okay, one more time? Please?" Carly begged.

"Carls, chill out," Sam said, rolling her eyes as she spread some cream cheese on her bagel she had just toasted. "I've told you how it happened four times already!"

"I know, but it's just so adorable!" Carly said.

"Yeah, I know," Sam said, grinning down at her sparkling new engagement ring. "But seriously, calm down. You're crazier than usual right now."

Just then the door of their shared apartment opened up and Freddie walked in, carrying a large bag of donuts. "Hey, I brought breakfast," he said cheerily.

He set the bag down on the counter and immediately went over to Sam, who wrapped her arms around his neck as he gave her a long kiss.

"Morning baby," Sam said when the two finally pulled apart.

"I missed you," Freddie smiled, playing with the ends of her hair.

"Yes, a whole eight hours apart," Carly chuckled, helping herself to a donut. "How did you _ever _survive."

Freddie laughed, his arm still around Sam. "It was a struggle, Carls."

"You guys are too perfect for each other," Carly said, looking at her best friends. "I'm so happy you're engaged now!"

"Me too," Sam said, standing on her toes to give her fiancé another kiss.

"Yeah, well, you guys _do _know there is more to being engaged than just making out all the time, right?" Carly said, opening a kitchen drawer and pulling out a large notebook.

"What do you mean?" Freddie asked.

"What do I mean?" Carly exclaimed. "I _mean _that we have a wedding to plan now!"

"Oh yeah," Sam nodded.

"Well there's a lot to do," Carly said, opening up the notebook. "I was up all night making this. It's a complete outline for planning your wedding."

"That thing's got to be at least fifty pages," Freddie commented.

"Sixty-four," Carly shrugged.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Sam aid. "Carly…Freddie and I don't want some huge, fancy, over-the-top wedding."

"Yeah," Freddie agreed. "We want something simple. Nice, yes. But not crazy."

"I know," Carly said. "But still, there's a ton of stuff you guys need to do. You need to pick a date, find a location for the ceremony _and _reception. You have to make a guest list, send out invitations, Freddie needs to decide who's going to be his best man, Sam, you need to pick your maid of honor and bridesmaids-"

"Carly, _obviously _you're my maid of honor," Sam said.

"Really? I am?" Carly squealed. "Yay!"

"You know, maybe she's got a point," Freddie said, looking at the notebook. "We _do _have a lot to do. We should get started."

"I guess," Sam sighed.

"Perfect," Carly said. She took the notebook back from Freddie. "Now then, I have a blank calendar print-out right here. Do you guys have and preference for when you want the wedding? I'd say anywhere between the March-May window would be good."

Freddie looked at Sam. "I like March."

"March is good," Sam agreed.

"Alright," Carly said, scribbling a few notes down in her notebook. "And the best day would probably be on a Saturday. Now, if I could just make one tiny suggestion…"

"Knock yourself out," Sam said, taking a chocolate donut from the bag.

"Well, I'd recommend the twenty-second," Carly said. "Because it's not near any holidays, it's towards the end of the month, so you'll have more time to plan, and according to my wedding research, you want your wedding day to be on an even-numbered date."

"Um…well I guess that works," Sam nodded.

"Yeah," Freddie said, turning to Sam. "March twenty-second…that's gonna be our wedding day, baby."

"I know," Sam grinned as Freddie leaned down to meet her lips.

"Alright!" Carly said, bringing the couple's attention back to her. "Now, we need to figure out where we're having the wedding. And again, just a suggestion…I happen to know that the Seattle First Wedding Hall has a spotless reputation for holding beautiful, romantic weddings."

"Um, well that sounds good," Freddie said. "I've driven past that place before. It's really nice. Plus I hear it's affordable."

"Seattle First Wedding Hall it is then," Sam said.

"Well, we'll have to call and make sure they're not booked for March twenty-second, but I'm sure you'll be fine," Carly said, writing in her notebook.

"Wow, Carls, that took less than ten minutes," Sam smiled. "Maybe this won't take so long."  
"Please," Carly scoffed. "I've got a whole month set aside just for trying to find your wedding dress."

"A month?"

"Baby, don't worry about it," Freddie said, rubbing her shoulder. "I'm sure it won't take an entire month. I mean, you _do _look good in anything."

"Aw," Sam laughed as she was about to kiss him again.

"Um, guys?" Carly said, interrupting an almost-kiss. "Not to be a downer or anything, but if you guys keep kissing every two seconds, you'll never get any planning done."

"Fine," Sam mumbled.

"Okay, here you go," Carly said, ripping out a few sheets of paper and handing the couple a pencil. "You guys start working on a rough draft of your guest list. I have a few really nice wedding invitation samples in my car that I picked up this morning before you woke up, Sam. Oh, there are these really nice ones with gold spirals going up and down the sides…I'll go get them!"

"So," Freddie sighed as Carly hurried out of the apartment. "Guess we should do this guest list."

"Before we get killed," Sam smiled.

"Alright," Freddie said. "We have Carly, Spencer, Gibby, T-Bo, my mom, your mom…"

"Wendy, Melanie, all my relatives in prison…" Sam added.

"My grandparents…um, my cousins," Freddie said, writing down the names while trying hard not to stare at Sam's lips. "Um…Um…"

"Oh you know what? That's good enough for now," Sam said, grabbing the list and yanking it away. She pulled Freddie's face down so that her lips could reach his.

"Okay you guys," Carly said happily a few minutes later, coming back to the apartment with the wedding invitation samples. "I have the-"

She stopped as she caught sight of the couple, now on the couch, caught up in a heavy make-out session.

"Hey! You guys!" Carly said loudly. "We have to pick out invitations! Guys! You guys!"

But the couple was too caught up in their own world to hear her.

"Oh…whatever," Carly said, rolling her eyes. But she couldn't help but smile.


	314. Chapter 314

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 296, where Freddie was dating an obnoxiously nice girl, but then got dumped. **

…**.**

_Hose_

"So she dumped you," Carly said slowly. "Because you were mean to a _cupcake_?"

"Yup," Freddie sighed.

Carly, Sam and Freddie were relaxing in the iCarly studio later that evening. They had been watching videos fans had sent in to iCarly, but then they eventually lost interest, and had decided to just lounge around for the rest of the night.

"Well, I'm sorry it didn't work out with you and Katie," Carly said.

"Eh, don't be," Freddie said. "Now that I think about it, she was really just a little too…"

"Nice?" Sam finished.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded.

"I know," Carly said. "I mean, I didn't want to say anything while you were dating her, but someone needed to hose that chick off! No one should be that preppy and happy all the time!"

"This coming from the girl who's wearing a necklace that says 'Bunnies and Love'," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Oh, you know what I mean," Carly said. She turned back to Freddie. "Anyway, you sure you're okay? Because Sam and I can totally give you our get-over-a-guy treatment. Or well, get-over-a-girl, for you. We can eat cookie dough, watch movies, look at funny things on the Internet…"

"Um, thanks but no thanks," Freddie said. "Like I said, I'm really not that bothered by this whole thing. You might want to take that little treatment over to my mom, though. She loved Katie. She said she was like the daughter she never got."

"Your mom's psychotic," Sam said.

"Yeah, I know," Freddie sighed. "She'll just have to get over it though. One thing I got from this whole thing was that I realized that girls like Katie are _definitely _not my type."

"So what _is _your type then?" Carly asked. "Please share."

"Ugh, is this gonna turn into a chick night?" Sam moaned. "I thought having Fredgut here would stop that from happening…apparently he's not man enough."

"Ha, ha," Freddie said dryly. He turned back to Carly. "I dunno…I guess I like a girl who isn't always so…lady-like and proper and sweet. I mean, yeah, that's nice once in a while, but I want a girlfriend who is funny, doesn't care what other people think…someone who won't just sit around and do whatever I want to do, but has a voice of her own."

Carly quickly glanced over at Sam, who was looking down at her lap.

"Um…Freddie?" Carly said, getting up out of her beanbag chair. "Do you wanna go downstairs and grab me some iced tea?"

"You have a bottle right there," Freddie pointed out.

"Um…I'm really thirsty," she said lamely.

"Okay," Freddie said, giving Carly a strange look as he headed towards the elevator. Carly waited until the door slid shut before running over to Sam and shaking her shoulders.

"Oh my God!" Carly exclaimed. "Did you hear that?"

"What? You shattering my ear drum?" Sam snapped, massaging her ear.

"Freddie was totally talking about you!"

"What? He was not," Sam said.

"Someone who's funny, doesn't care what other people think, has a voice of her own…" Carly repeated. "That's like the definition of Sam Puckett!"

"And probably a million other girls," Sam said, shaking Carly off her.

"No, not a million other girls," Carly said. "Sam! Wake-up, will you? This is a sign that Freddie realized that he still wants _you_!"

"Carly," Sam said. "When Freddie was listing off what he wants in a girl…did you hear him mention loud, aggressive, violent, or has a prison record?"

"Um…no?"

"Exactly," Sam said. "Look…Freddie may not want a girl who's a total girly-girl like Katie was, but that doesn't mean that he wants me. We tried that before, remember? And it didn't end well…Besides, I _told _you…I didn't care when Freddie was seeing her. He-He can date whoever he wants because I'm _over _him."

"Sam, I'm your best friend," Carly said. "And as your best friend I've noticed that for the few hours that have passes since Katie and Freddie have broken up, you've been in one of the best moods you've been in all year."

"Yeah, because I won't have to deal Katie anymore," Sam said, getting to her feet.

"Where are you going?" Carly asked.

"Somewhere I won't be harassed," Sam said, stepping into the elevator.

As the doors slid closed, and the elevator began to descend, Sam sighed and leaned back against the wall. She hadn't been that obvious that she was happy Freddie and Katie had broken up, had she?  
Sam shook her head. Well, it didn't even matter _how _good the fact that Freddie was single again made her feel, because like she had told Carly, there was still no way his description of his ideal girlfriend included her. In this exact elevator, in fact, he had told her that she needed to be more 'normal', and as hard as she had been trying the past few months, she didn't think she could ever get to where Freddie would consider normal.

As the elevator reached the first floor, the door slid open and Sam was just about to step out and go home, but she was met at once by Freddie, who must've been waiting right outside the doors.

"Oh, hey," Freddie said, shifting the pizza box in his arms. "Where are you going?"

"Um, home," Sam shrugged.

"Why?" Freddie frowned. "Carly said you were spending the night."

"Yeah, well, change of plans."

"Did you guys have a fight?"

"No," Sam sighed. "I just…I just kind of want to chill out on my own for a little bit, okay nub?"

"Well, alright," Freddie shrugged. "Then I guess Carly and I will have to struggle to somehow finish this Meat Slam pizza Spencer just gave us on our own…"

He opened the box a bit so that the aroma wafted up to Sam's nose, making her mouth water. She looked up at his big brown eyes, and instantly felt weak.

"Fine," she moaned, stepping back into the elevator. "I'll stay."

Freddie smiled as he stepped into the elevator as well and pushed the button to take them back upstairs.

"So," he said. "Why was suddenly kicked out of the studio to get Carly an iced tea?"

"Eh, she was just being weird," Sam shrugged. "She wanted to talk about something completely ridiculous…"

"Well why couldn't I hear?"

"Because maybe it was about you," Sam smirked.

"But why were you guys-" but just then, the elevator gave a mighty lurch, and stopped moving.

"Did you stop the elevator?" Sam frowned.

"No! I'm no where near the button!" Freddie replied. "The power probably went out or something."

"So we're stuck in here?" Sam asked. "Aw man!"

"I don't get signal," Freddie said, looking at his phone. "So we can't call for help."

"Well," Sam said, grabbing the pizza box from Freddie. "At least we won't starve."

"Hang on," Freddie said, looking up. "We're probably not too far below the studio. If you stand on my shoulders, you can probably pry the door open and we can get out of here!"

"Dude, relax, the power will come back on," Sam said, sitting down on the floor, biting into a slice of pizza.

Freddie sighed, sliding down next to her. "Hopefully." He took a slice of pizza, trying hard not to think about the last time he had been stuck in an elevator with Sam. "So…are you really gonna not tell me what you and Carly were saying about me?"

Sam rolled her eyes. "You _really _want to know? It's pretty lame."

"Well we don't have a whole lot else to do in here," Freddie said.

"Fine," Sam shrugged. "She just thought, God this is so stupid, she thought, when you were telling her what type of girl you like, that you were describing someone like _me_." She laughed. "Can you believe that?"

Freddie smiled too. "Yeah…pretty-pretty wild."

Silence fell over the two as they ate their pizza.

"I mean," Freddie said, bravely breaking the silence. "It's not _so _crazy."

"What do you mean?" Sam asked.

"You know…out of the few girlfriends I've had, you've been my longest," Freddie shrugged. "I dunno, I guess _something's _there."

"Yeah, and we broke up because of that something, remember?" Sam said. "You know, because I was too 'abnormal'."

"Yeah I know," Freddie said. He cleared his throat. "Um, do-do you ever sometimes think about that? Our breakup?"

_Every day_, Sam thought to herself. "Um…sometimes," Sam lied. "Do you?"

_Only every time I see you_, Freddie thought. "Um, yeah, once in awhile," he said. He bit the corner of his lip, deep in thoughts. "Do you ever think…do you ever think we gave it up too easily?"

Sam stared at him. "What?"

"I just…I just sometimes think that we could've fixed our problems we had," Freddie admitted. "And if we had done that…we'd probably still be together. But instead, we basically just said hey, we're too different for each other, let's call it quits. Maybe…maybe we didn't realize it then, but don't you think it was our different personalities that really made us click?"

Sam gave him a small smile. "You mean you didn't mind dealing with my crazy antics for an entire month?"

"It was kind of fun," Freddie grinned. "Did you mind dealing with my not-so-crazy antics for an entire month?"

"They grew on me," Sam admitted. She sighed. "Well, okay…if we didn't mind each others differences so much, then why'd we-"

"Break up?" Freddie finished for her. "I think it was because we were just scared. It was our longest relationship, we were both kind of in new territory…I guess we just sort of panicked. But I don't know about you…but I think it was sort my worst mistake."

Sam felt her heartbeat increasing. "I think it was mine too," she said softly.

"Well," Freddie said, moving closer to her, staring deep into her light blue eyes. "How do you think we should fix it?"

Sam chuckled. "Maybe like this?" And with that she leaned over and kissed him. At once he had his arms around and was deepening the kiss.

The new couple was so immersed in their activity that they didn't even notice the elevator begin to move, until it dinged and the door slid open, revealing the studio, and Carly standing right next to the elevator control.

"And you are welcome," Carly said as the couple pulled apart in surprise.

"Carly?" Sam exclaimed.

"You stopped the elevator?" Freddie frowned.

"Yup," Carly said, taking the pizza box and pushing the down button. "I mean honestly, _someone _had to help you two out."

"You know I'm going to kill you," Sam said, though a smile was creeping onto her face.

"Just have fun, you guys," Carly said as the door began to slide down. "And then you can yell at me all you want."


	315. Chapter 315

_Room_

"Sam," Freddie sighed, trying to hide the frustration in his voice as he looked up at his girlfriend, who was tapping the corner of their table with a pen repeatedly. "_Must _you?"

"Whoa, someone's on the jank," Sam said, reaching over and taking a sip of his insanely large coffee.

"I'm _trying _to get some work done," Freddie said, taking his coffee back.

"Dude, ease up, will you?" Sam said, rolling her eyes. "The best thing about college is that there's no homework! I haven't gotten one assignment from any of my classes this whole semester!"

"Yes, but you _do _know you're supposed to be studying for midterms, which count for half your grade," Freddie said. "That's why we have all this time."

"I'll wing it," Sam shrugged. "Now come on, it's almost ten! The library's gonna be closing in an hour. Let's do something fun tonight."

"I just want to get through one more chapter in my programing class," Freddie said.

Sam groaned and leaned over, closing his book. "You would really rather stay here all night then go out with _me_?"

Freddie's heart began to race as realized how close Sam was to him…her lips almost touching his. He instinctively began to lean forward to meet hers, but she pulled away before he could taste her sweet lips.

"Well," she sighed, grabbing her bag and getting up from their table. "I guess if you'd _really _rather just study, I'll go back to my dorm room and-"

"I studied enough today, I guess," Freddie said quickly, shoveling his books into his bag.

Sam smiled happily to herself. "Too easy…"

The couple hurried back to the dorm room that Sam and Carly shared.

"So what do you wanna do?" Freddie asked as Sam pulled her room key out of her pocket.

"I dunno," Sam shrugged. "We could go dancing, or go catch a movie…anything beats sitting in that library for another hour."

"You didn't even do any work," Freddie chuckled as they pushed the door open.

"It was still boring," Sam said.

"Oh good, you guys are back!" Carly said, looking up from her mirror where she was applying a shiny coat of lip-gloss. "I was just about to call you…how would you guys like to go to a party?"

"A party?" Freddie frowned, sitting down on the edge of Sam's bed. "I dunno…"

"Oh come on, _please_," Carly begged. "This cute boy in my Anthropology class told me about it; it's supposed to be insane, and I don't want to go by myself."

"Hey, I could go for a party," Sam nodded. "You in, baby?"

"Well…you two go ahead," Freddie said. "I'm really not much of a partier."

"But you'll have so much fun!" Carly said. "You don't have to do anything you're uncomfortable with. Besides, Sam and I have been to college parties, and you've been here almost a whole semester and you haven't been to one."

"Yeah, Fredward, if I grew up with a crazy mom like yours, I'd go party crazy the second I got rid of her," Sam said.

"Are you two _peer pressuring _me?" Freddie asked.

"No," Sam said, putting her arms around her. "If you really don't want to go…I'll stay back with you. I'm sure Carly could just go to the party with the girls next door to us."

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "It's fine, Freddie."

"Well…wait a minute," Freddie said slowly. "I guess…I guess it _would _be interesting to see what one of these crazy college parties is about…"

"So you'll come?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," Freddie conceded. "I'll go."

…

"Wow, this looks awesome!" Carly commented as her, Sam and Freddie walked into the party an hour later. There were flashing lights everywhere and the stereo was blasting so loud that Freddie could feel his eardrums pounding.

"Yeah, finally, a party that actually lives up to its expectation," Sam nodded.

"Hey, there's the cute guy that invited me here," Carly said, nudging Sam and nodding over to a tall, dark haired guy who was dancing around like a maniac. "I'm gonna go say hi to him."

"Alright," Sam said. She looked up at her boyfriend. "So, baby. You liking it so far?"

"Um…yeah, sure," Freddie nodded, plastering a fake smile on. "This-This is totally my scene."

"Well, come on, I don't wanna just stand around," Sam said, taking his hand. "Dance with me!"

"Oh, um, yeah," Freddie said as Sam led him out to the dance floor, where there were a bunch of people (who did not seem to be fully 'coherent') were jumping around waving their arms and laughing.

Freddie had taken Sam dancing once or twice back in Seattle (after numerous hints from Carly that Sam had probably persuaded her to drop), but it was nothing like this. Freddie could feel people all around him and it was all he could do to keep Sam in his sight.

"Hey!" a bubbly red head suddenly said, staggering up to Freddie. "You are _hot_! Wanna dance with me?"

"Um, no, no," Freddie said. "Um…I'm dancing with my _girlfriend_, Sam." He pulled Sam closer to him.

"But I'm prettier than her!" the girl pouted.

Sam glared at her. If she didn't have a policy about beating up chicks in her _condition_, this freak would be flipped over on the floor already.

"Hey, Blondie!" a guy said, approaching Sam. "Wanna come over here with me?"

"Hey! She's my-" Freddie started by Sam quickly kicked his shin.

"Oh calm down," she hissed. "You're gonna get yourself beat up! Besides, he doesn't even know what he's doing right now, I bet. Here," she grabbed the red head's wrist and pulled her over to the boy. "You two…dance."

"Okay!" the red head said happily.

Sam turned back to Freddie and sighed, seeing how uncomfortable he was. "Come on, baby, let's take a break from dancing," she said.

"If you insist," Freddie said, trying to play off what a nightmare he had just experienced. "I'm pretty thirsty; wanna get some punch?"

"It's spiked punch," Sam told him. "Just so you know…"

"Spiked with what?" Freddie asked. "A new flavoring? I hear Whaoo Punch makes these fruit flavored powders to add that gives their punch an extra kick."

"Um…well you'll definitely get an extra kick," Sam said, shaking her head. But she couldn't help but smile at her boyfriend's naivety. "Man, your mom really did a good job of keeping you as 'innocent' as possible."

"Oh…thanks?"

"Not a compliment," Sam chuckled. She put her hand on his shoulder. "You don't really like it here, do you?"

Freddie sighed. "Um…not exactly. But hey, don't worry about me. You wanted to have fun tonight, so we will."

Sam smiled. "No, come on, let's get out of here. We can go back to my dorm and do something you'd probably enjoy more, you know, since we'll have the place to ourselves."

"I like where this is going," Freddie grinned.

Sam spotted Carly with a large group of people, chatting and laughing. She quickly tapped her best friend's shoulder, and Carly spun around.

"Oh, hey Sam!" Carly smiled. "You and Freddie having a good time?"

"Um, yeah, but I think we're gonna head back home," Sam said. "You alright here by yourself?"

"Yeah," Carly nodded.

"Okay, but Freddie and I will walk you home though," Carly said. "So just call us when you're ready and we'll come and get you."

"Thanks," Carly smiled. "Have fun you guys. Sorry I sort of forced you out in the first place."

"Eh, it's cool, the nub needed to get one party in him," Sam shrugged. "And now he knows for sure that it is _not _his scene."

Carly laughed, and then turned back around to her group.

"I'm sorry I wasn't too good at this whole 'party' thing," Freddie said as him and Sam left, heading back towards Sam's dorm.

Sam rolled her eyes. "I didn't expect you to be…but I wanted you to actually do _something _fun. You've been going crazy studying lately. And I can still just go out with Carly like I usually do while you stay in and web chat your crazy mother."

"Hey, I only need to call her three times a day now," Freddie defended.

"Oh, well don't get too carried away there then," Sam laughed.


	316. Chapter 316

**AN-So this request is a version of iLove You with Emma and Quincy.**

…

_Knife_

"Well," Freddie said, coming into his and Sam's bedroom, flopping down on their bed and in the process waking his napping wife. "Looks like I'm watching _Galaxy Wars: The Making Of_ documentary in here."

"Why?" Sam moaned, rolling over moodily. "I'm sleeping here! Go watch it downstairs."

"I can't," Freddie mumbled.

"Why?" Sam groaned, sitting up.

"Because Emma's down there with Quincy watching T.V. and I'd _prefer _to not watch those two being all…cuddly," Freddie said, turning on their own television.

"So you have to come in here and wake me up?"

"Oh…sorry," Freddie said.

"Baby…come on," Sam yawned. "You need to get past the whole 'I Hate That My Daughters Are Dating Now' thing. You've said before you'd rather Emma be with a boy like Quincy, who you've known since he was born _and _are best friends with his dad."

"Doesn't mean I like seeming them all smooch," Freddie muttered.

Sam rolled her eyes. "Whatever. But you know what? I'm sure they appreciate the privacy you gave them…the two of them all alone down there. I bet they aren't even watching T.V. anymore…"

"And I'm gone," Freddie said, springing up from the bed and hurrying back downstairs.

Sam smiled victoriously to herself as she curled back up under her covers and drifted off to sleep.

…

"Hey, you guys!" Freddie said loudly as he came down the stairs into the living room, happy to see that Emma and Quincy were still in fact watching T.V.

"Oh…hi dad," Emma said as Freddie sat down in one of the armchairs next to the couch.

"So, what are we watching?" Freddie said.

"Nothing," Emma said as her and Quincy got to their feet. "We're just about to head out."

"Where you going?" Freddie asked.

"My pottery club meeting," Quincy replied.

"Um…_both _of you?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah," Emma sighed. "Clarissa and Ashton were telling us the other day about how important it is for couples to 'explore each others activities', and they said that we should give it a try…so that's why I'm stuck going to his lame club."

"It'll be fun," Quincy told her.

"Yeah, okay," Emma said, rolling her eyes. She turned back to her father. "Anyway, we're grabbing dinner afterwards, so I'll probably be home around nine."

"Alright," Freddie nodded. "Have fun."

"Yeah I doubt it," Emma said as her and Quincy headed out of the house.

…..

"So you guys all just sit around in someone basement making clay pots?" Emma frowned as her and Quincy headed down to the pottery club meeting.

"It's really cool," Quincy told her.

Emma bit her tongue as Quincy opened the basement door.

"Hey, guys," he said to the five other guys in the basement. "Who's ready to start making some bowls?"

"Um…Quincy?" one of the boys frowned. "There-There's a _female _behind you."

"Oh yeah, you guys know my girlfriend, Emma," Quincy said.

"'Sup?" Emma said.

"You can't bring girls to pottery club!" one of the other boys exclaimed.

"Why not? Because none of you have ever been this close to one?" Emma snapped.

"Guys, she's cool, she just wants to make pots with us," Quincy said. "Right Em?"

"Yes, it's all I've ever wanted," Emma said dryly.

"Everyone knows that girls can't make pots!" the boy said firmly, stepping closer to Emma to escort her out. "It's man's work! So come on, _female_, out you-ow!"

Emma had grabbed his arm and easily flipped him down onto the floor.

"Emma," Quincy moaned.

"So you still want to kick me out?" Emma smirked down at the boy.

"No, no!" the boy squeaked. "Stay, please! I insist!"

"So how do I make one of these pots?" Emma asked, picking up a chunk of clay.

"You spin it," Quincy explained, sitting down with his own clay at one of the old-fashioned clay spinners.

"Spin it?" Emma repeated as the rest of the boys sat down at their spinners as well.

"Yeah, it's real relaxing," Quincy nodded. "Oh! We almost forgot our clay spinning music!"

"I'm on it!" one of the boys said, hurrying over to an old radio, pushing a button so loud classical music was emitted.

"Classical?" Emma frowned. "Can't we put something on a bit more…modern?"

"No way!" the boy said. "This is the traditional music of clay spinners everywhere."

Emma shook her head. "Unbelievable."

…..

About an hour later, Quincy and the other boys, who had gone upstairs to get some snacks, returned down to the basement.

"Hey," Emma said, looking up from one of the spinners she had been making some 'adjustments' to. "Look. I fixed this spinner here so that it spins at nearly five hundred revs per minute!"

"Whoa, wait, Emma," Quincy said as his girlfriend placed a huge slab of clay onto the printer. "Don't do-!"

But it was too late. Emma had already turned on the spinner, which began to spin as such speed that chunks of clay began to fly all around the basement. Hitting the boys in the face and flying into their pots, smashing them.

"Pretty cool, huh?" Emma smirked as she slowed the spinner down.

"My pot!" one of the boys said weakly.

…

"Yup," Quincy sighed the next day, checking his email while him, Emma, Ashton and Clarissa were hanging out in the twins' room. "I'm kicked out of pottery club."

"You were that bad?" Ashton asked her sister.

"It was a total freak parade in there!" Emma defended. "I was the only cool person there!"

Quincy raised an eyebrow.

"And you too," Emma smiled, patting his back. "Kind of."

"Aw," Quincy smiled.

"Well, okay, so Emma's not really the pottery club type," Clarissa said. "What about you do something that Emma likes, Quince?"

"Yeah, for that all you'd need to do is lay in front of the T.V. for ten straight hours shoveling junk food down your face," Ashton said.

"Cute," Emma smirked.

Quincy turned to Emma. "What do you want to do?"

"Why don't you guys go to one of her little track meetings?" Clarissa suggested.

"Okay, first of all, they're track _meets_, not meetings," Emma said. "And second, it's not track season for another two months."

"Well what about your soccer games?"

"Clarissa...it's not soccer season either," Emma said, rolling her eyes. "Honestly, you'd think you'd know _something _about sports from being best friends with me for sixteen years."

"Well then _you _pick something," Clarissa said.

"Hey! I know!" Emma said. "We can go see that new version of the fourth _Galaxy Wars _movie, _New Desires_!"

"That doesn't seem that bad," Quincy shrugged.

"Oh, you must've never watched a _Galaxy Wars _movie with her before," Ashton said. "It's…it's something."

"Shut up!" Emma said, throwing a pillow from her bed at her twin. She turned back to Quincy. "There's a whole twenty-five extra seconds of never-before seen footage in it. My dad can't make it because he's got some meeting at work, so he bought me and Jason tickets for it last month, but Jason has midterms next week at college so he can't come home, so I have an extra ticket."

"Perfect," Quincy said. "I'm up for a little Neutron Riders and Nog Nog."

"Oh my God…" Emma sighed.

….

"So how long is this movie?" Quincy asked as the couple took their seats in the crowded theatre. "An hour? Forty-five minutes?"

"Um, try two hours and thirty-eight minutes of pure _brilliance_," Emma said.

"Two and a half _hours_?"

"I know," Emma grinned, grabbing the popcorn from him. "It's totally amazing!"

"Well…can we at least do what we do during every _other _movie we go to?" Quincy asked.

"You do not make out during _Galaxy Wars_!" Emma exclaimed. "Ever! That's like, against the law."

Quincy sighed. "Don't you think some of these people are a little…geeky though? I mean, isn't it a little much wearing a costume to a movie?"

"Hey, you're the one who looks all geeky in that stupid button down shirt and kakis," Emma said, rolling her eyes. "I told you to borrow a _Galaxy Wars _t-shirt from your dad."

"I don't really like his style," Quincy said.

"You have the exact same style you-Oh, shhh! It's starting!"

The theatre darkened and everyone cheered as the title flashed on screen.

As a bunch of ships began to fly onto the screen, Quincy instantly felt his eyes growing heavier. He never got the appeal of _Galaxy Wars_, much to his father's dismay, and as much as he wanted to try and enjoy it for Emma's sake, it was getting harder and harder to remain awake…

Exactly two hours and thirty-eight minutes later, when the film ended, Emma applauded with the rest of the audience as the ending credits rolled on screen.

"You see?" Emma said happily. "Wasn't that the best thing you've ever-dude!"

"Huh? What?" Quincy stuttered, jerking awake.

"You fell asleep!"

"No, no I didn't!" Quincy said quickly. "I-I was awake the whole time!"

"Then what happened?" Emma asked, crossing her arms.

"Um…well…some guys were in space…and-and-"

"Unbelievable!" Emma exclaimed. "Who the heck falls asleep during _Galaxy Wars_? What's _wrong _with you?"

"Well who can stay awake for two and a half hours watching weird astronauts fighting with light up swords?"

"Let's just go," Emma snapped. "You uncultured freak."

The couple stormed out of the movie theatre only to find that it was pouring down rain, and everyone was huddled outside the lobby to stay dry.

The couple stood there in silence for a few moments, both in deep thought.

"Sorry I fell asleep during _Galaxy Wars_," Quincy finally sighed.

"Sorry I got you kicked out of pottery club," Emma mumbled.

"No way does Princess Ablagota belong with Lou Groundrunner!" a group of people said suddenly, stopping next to Quincy and Emma.

"Why not? They've known each other since Sky Naut academy," someone else in the group said.

"Yeah, and they're great friends," the first man said. "But a romantic relationship? That seems forced. And when they're together it just seems a little…off."

"Well what should they do? Just stop trying to fight the fortress?"

"No," the man said. "They should still be good friends and partners, but they should just stop taking that that little connection they have and trying to make it into a romantic one."

"Maybe you're right," the second man nodded. "Oh look! There's mom with the Winnebago!"

As the group ran off, neither Emma or Quincy could manage to look the other in the eye.

…

"Worst meeting ever," Freddie said, dragging his feet upstairs to his and Sam's bedroom.

"Aw, I'm sorry, baby," Sam said, patting his shoulder. "At least you're home now."

"Yeah, right now all I want to do is relax," Freddie said.

"Well have fun," Sam said. "I'm gonna go see Carly. She recorded this show about lifeguards or something…we're gonna sit around and watch hot shirtless guys dive into water."

"How nice," Freddie said sarcastically, rolling his eyes.

Just then the couple heard their front door slam closed from downstairs.

"Emma and Quincy must be back from the movie," Sam said.

"Oh, I wanna go ask them how it was," Freddie said. "I can't believe I had to miss it…"

Sam and Freddie started for the steps, but they had only made it down two steps when they heard Emma speak.

"So…you heard those people at the movie?" Emma asked in a soft voice.

Sam and Freddie stopped, realizing that the teenagers probably didn't want to be interrupted, judging by Emma's tone.

"They weren't talking about us," Quincy sighed.

Freddie and Sam exchanged confused looks, but said nothing as they continued to listen.

"I know," Emma said. She was silent for a moment. "But do you think that maybe they were right? About the whole 'trying to force a relationship' thing?"

"I don't know," Quincy said heavily. "I mean…we've known each other our whole life…and we've always had that special connection…usually it involved physical pain on my part, but you know, we've always managed to have fun together."

"Yeah," Emma said, showing a small smile. "But…maybe you and I…maybe we're just not meant to be boyfriend and girlfriend if it's this difficult for us to do things together."

"Maybe," Quincy mumbled. "But we did still manage to have _some _good times, didn't we?"

"Yeah," Emma chuckled. "We did. And, you know…maybe if you get a little more...spontanious."

"And you get a little more structured," Quincy said.

The two were silent again. "So I guess we broke up," Emma said finally.

"I guess," Quincy sighed. "But…at least neither of us dumped the other; we ended on good terms, right?"

"Yeah, totally," Emma nodded. "But…you know I'm still making the official story that I dumped you and you're a total wreck over it."

Quincy laughed. "Sounds like a plan."

"Well…okay then," Emma said, her voice shakey.

"I guess I should head home…" Quincy said, heading towards the front door. He grabbed the door handle and was just about to turn the knob when he turned around.

"I love you," he said sincerely to Emma.

Emma's cheeks reddened slightly and she smiled. "I love you too."

The two stared at one another for a second before moving closer and kissing each other.

"You know," Quincy said, looking at his phone. "Neither of us has to be home for another two hours…"

"Wanna break up at midnight?" Emma asked.

"That works," Quincy said, grabbing her hand. "Come on."

And with that, the two left the house.

"Did-Did they just really break up?" Freddie asked once the front door closed.

Sam nodded, feeling like a knife had just ripped through her heart as she remembered the look on her daughter's face. "They did."

"Oh man…" Freddie sighed. "She-She really liked him, didn't she?"

"Yeah," Sam said softly.

"I never really thought they'd ever break up," Freddie mumbled. "Oh man…Emma's probably crushed right now."

"Hey, they-they can work this out…eventually," Sam said.

"You think?"

"I hope so, at least," Sam said as Freddie wrapped an arm around her.


	317. Chapter 317

_Passport_

"Where _is _it?" Spencer exclaimed, tearing apart his kitchen.

"Hey, Spence," Freddie said as him, Sam and Gibby walked into the apartment. "Um…what are you doing?"

"Trying to find my stupid passport!" Spencer said, rummaging through a drawer.

"Oh that's right, you're going to Italy to visit Carly and your dad next week," Sam said.

"Not if I can't find my passport!"

"You can just borrow mine," Gibby offered.

"Gib, you can't just loan out passports," Freddie explained. "If Spencer got caught trying to use someone else's passport, he would be in serious trouble."

"Yeah, and I am _not _going back to airport jail!" Spencer said.

"Not the funnest jail," Sam agreed, sitting down on the couch.

"Hey, you know what we should do tonight?" Gibby said as Freddie sat down next to Sam, putting an arm around her. "We should make origami!"

"Origami?" Freddie frowned. "Um…isn't that a bit…odd?"

"Oh, well sorry for trying to bring some _culture _into the group," Gibby snapped.

"I'll origami _you_," Sam mumbled, texting someone on her Pearphone.

"And anyway, Sam and I have dinner reservations tonight," Freddie said.

"And I'm not invited?" Gibby said indignantly.

"Well…it's sort of a date," Freddie told him. "But we can all go out to dinner tomorrow night. You free baby?"

"Huh? Oh yeah, sure," Sam said, not looking up from her phone screen.

"You texting Carly?" Freddie asked. "Tell her I say 'hey'."

"It's not Carly," Sam said, quickly putting her phone away.

"Whoa, you text other people besides Carly?" Gibby said.

"I have other friends!" Sam frowned, throwing one of the couch cushions at Gibby, causing to fall back and trip over the coffee table.

"Hey! Unzip that couch cushion and look inside it!" Spencer said as he began yanking books off the bookshelf. "My passport might be inside it!"

"Kay kay," Gibby said weakly, rubbing his head.

"You've been texting ever since we left school," Freddie said. "If you aren't talking to Carly, then who _are_ you talking to?"

"Um…you-you remember that chick Dana? From prison?" Sam said.

"You mean the one who tied me, Gib and Carly to a wall and _threw _things at us?" Freddie recalled bitterly. "Yeah…I remember _her_. I didn't know you were still friends with her."

"I'm not," Sam sighed.

"Then why are you texting her?" Freddie frowned.

"She-She's still sort of mad that I beat her up with my butter sock, saved you guys and ruined her smash party," Sam explained. "So for the past two week she's been texting me saying that 'I'm gonna get it' and that her and her little group of prison girls are gonna make me pay."

"Wait, she's threatening you?" Freddie exclaimed.

"Hold on, what?" Spencer said, looking up from the jacket pockets he was looking in. "You're getting threats from a group of prison girls?"

"Yeah," Sam shrugged. "But whatever, they're probably all talk."

"Who cares!? They're still threatening you!" Freddie said. "Sam, this is serious! Who knows what those girls are capable of?"

"Nothing more than I am," Sam pointed out.

"Yeah, but you-you wouldn't _do _what they might do," Freddie said. "You've straightened out; they haven't."

"Yeah, I don't like this," Spencer said seriously. "I'm gonna call the cops right now and-"

"No!" Sam said. "That's-That's just crazy. I told you, Dana and her backup gang are nothing. I can take care of myself. Especially with this baby." She pulled her butter sock out of her bag.

"It looks bigger than usual," Gibby commented.

"That's because there's _two _sticks of hard butter in there now," Sam grinned.

"Baby…please, you're not invincible," Freddie said.

"You're calling me weak?"

"No, I'm calling you human!" Freddie said. "I know you're tough and can beat up practically anybody, but if these girls really want to hurt you…What if they call in more of their prison friends? Or come after you with a _real _weapon that could _destroy _your butter sock?"

"They're not gonna-" Sam started.

"Sam, he's right," Spencer said. "You need to call the cops and-"

"No way," Sam said firmly. "Besides, you don't think calling the cops on this crazy chick would make her even more angry? And anyway, Dana's been texting me for two weeks already and she hasn't done anything! I know her; she's just angry and chiz right now, but in a few days she'll find an abandoned car, steal it, and be all happy again and forget about me."

"Sam, I don't think-"

"Baby, come on, just drop it, okay?" Sam said. "Please?"

Freddie sighed in defeat. "Okay."

….

A few hours later, after Freddie had dropped Sam off at her house after their date, Freddie returned to Spencer's apartment.

"Hey," he said. "You find your passport yet?"

"Nope," Spencer said, dialing a number on his Pearphone.

"Who you calling?"

"The cops," Spencer said. "To tell them about Dana threatening Sam."

"I was just about to do the same thing," Freddie said. "She's probably gonna be real mad at us, but I don't care. I'd rather have a mad Sam that a hurt Sam…"

"I know," Spencer said. "Here, I'll put the phone on speaker so you can hear."

"Hello, Seattle Police Department," a voice on Spencer's phone said.

"Hey, I need to report some threatening text messages that have been sent to a friend of mine," Spencer said. "The threats are coming from a girl named Dana…."

"Hackman," Freddie finished.

"Dana Hackman?" the police officer said. "Hang on…she was just brought in here by a patrol officer about twenty minutes ago."

"Really? Well that's great!" Spencer said. "At least she's off the streets. But is there anything you can do about the text messages she has been sending?"

"Yeah…just give me a minute though," the officer said. "If you want to file and new accusation against her I'll need to pull up a new report. Her and some pals of hers are in here right now for assaulting another girl, and-"

"Wait, wait, wait!" Freddie said, his eyes widening. "Another girl…was-was her name Samantha Puckett?"

"Puckett…Puckett…yes," the officer said. "That was her. The officer who brought Hackman and the others in had to pull them all off of her."

"Well is she okay?" Spencer asked hurriedly.

"A little beaten up, but nothing too bad," the officer said. "She's down here at the station right now answering some questions, but-"

"Come on," Freddie said as Spencer quickly hung up his phone. "We got to get over there!"

…..

"Hi, um, we need to get Sam Puckett right now," Freddie said urgently to the first officer he saw at the police station as him and Spencer rushed in.

"You her family?" the officer asked.

"Um…sure," Spencer nodded.

"Oh, okay. Right this way," the officer said, leading Freddie and Spencer to an interview room.

As the officer opened the door, Freddie saw Sam sitting in a chair, her face scratched up and a definite shiner sprouting around her left eye. Her arm was wrapped up with gauze and she was clutching her stomach with her other arm.

"Sam!" Freddie exclaimed, running in and wrapping his arms around his girlfriend. "Are you okay? What happened?"

"How-How'd you two know I was here?" Sam frowned.

"That's not important," Spencer said quickly.

"Dana and her friends did this to you?" Freddie frowned. "Did-Did they break into your house or something?"

"Um, no," Sam sighed. "After you dropped me off, I started sort of craving a smoothie, so I decided to walk over to the Groovy Smoothie. And that's when Dana showed up…"

"Baby, I told you, you shouldn't mess around with her," Freddie said gently.

Sam didn't reply.

"Is your mom coming?" Spencer asked her.

"Yeah, she's on her way," Sam nodded.

"When she gets here, we should get you to a hospital to get checked out," Freddie said, looking at a nasty cut on her forehead. "Did you hit your head? You might have a concussion."

"No, I'm fine," Sam sighed. "Besides…you should see Dana and the other four. I heard an officer say that _they're _gonna have to go to the hospital before they get shipped off to prison. I told you I could handle myself."

"Sam, look at you!" Freddie said. "You're all scraped up! And if a police officer hadn't come in and broken this whole thing up, who knows what could've happened! I just wish…I just wish you'd just realize that even you need to be protected sometimes and can't always take care of yourself."

Sam looked down at her lap. "But…that's how I've always been. I've always taken care of myself with this sort of thing."

"I know," Freddie said gently, taking her hand. "But now you have me."


	318. Chapter 318

**AN-This oneshot is a sequel to chapter 274, where Freddie is in a bad car accident.**

…**.**

_Telescope_

"Freddie! Are you serious right now?"

"Sam, I told you, I just don't want to be there, okay?" Freddie said as the two sat up in their bedroom.

"Why not?" Sam demanded. "Why wouldn't you want to be at the trial of the man who put you in a _coma _because he was drunk driving? Huh? Wouldn't you want to see some justice be done?"

"It will be, I'm sure he'll get his license suspended or have to serve time or whatever," Freddie said. "But I don't want to be there for it. I finally got out of the hospital three days ago, and I want to put this whole thing behind me and move on with my life."

"Don't you want to at least _see _the guy?" Sam asked.

"Nope," Freddie said simply.

"You don't have anything you want to say to him?" Sam asked, crossing her arms.

"Sam, please, I don't want to do this, okay?" Freddie sighed. "I just want to try to forget about this."

Sam was about to argue, but thought better of it at the last second. "Okay," she said. "If that's what you want."

"Thank you," Freddie said, grabbing his crutches. "Now I'm gonna go out back with the telescope and help Ashton with her science project.

"Alright," Sam said softly, resisting the urge to go over to her husband and help him with his crutches, because she knew that he would just tell her that he wanted to do it on his own.

As Freddie left the bedroom, she laid back on their bed.

She was glad Freddie at least seemed ready to put this whole ordeal behind him. But her on the other hand…it had been weeks since the accident, and there had still yet to be a night where she didn't find herself jerked awake as nightmares of that day haunted her sleep.

She sighed. Freddie had his closure, but she was going to make sure she got hers too.

….

"I see why Spencer didn't want to go to law school," Carly said as her and Sam took their seats in the courtroom a few days later. "It's so stuffy in this place! He wouldn't have lasted ten minutes."

"Yeah, place is a real downer," Sam mumbled.

"You doing okay so far?" Carly asked gently.

"I'm fine," Sam said quickly. "Thanks again for coming, by the way. I just didn't want to be here alone."

"It's no problem, Sam," Carly said.

"I still can't believe that Freddie wouldn't want to be here to see the guy get sentenced," Sam said. "If it were me, I'd want to make sure he got punished."

"Everyone has different ways of handling things," Carly said.

"But still, don't you think he'd want to-"

"Court is now in session," the judge said, and the courtroom fell silent.

"We are here today," the judge continued. "For the sentencing of Jeffery Jacobs, who has been charged with one count of driving while intoxicated, and one count reckless endangerment of another individual resulting in serious injury."

"That's the guy?" Carly whispered, looking over on the left side of the courtroom, where a man in his fifties stood next to his lawyer.

"I guess," Sam mumbled. She had never seen this man; all the police had ever told her was his name. She had been thinking that it was some dumb kid coming back from a long night of partying that had slammed into Freddie on his way to work, but this guy was older than her and Freddie. "The state's trying to get him jail time, but his lawyer's trying to get him off on community service and driving school."

"For almost killing Freddie?!"

"Yup," Sam sighed.

The trial lasted for almost three hours. Under normal circumstances, Sam would've likely fallen asleep five minutes in, but now she felt wide awake, and was staring intently at the back of the defendant's head.

"Alright," the judge said after the state attorney had spoken for the last time. "I've reached my sentencing decision. Will the defendant rise?"

Sam and Carly watched as the man stood up with his lawyer.

"Mr. Jacobs will have his license revoked immediately," the judge began. "It will be eligible for renewal in five years. The defendant will also serve thirty days in the Seattle State Penitentiary, since this is this third DUI offense."

"That's insane! The guy lived!" Jeffery Jacobs exclaimed. "You can't put me in jail!"

"I can and I did," the judge said simply. "Court is now dismissed."

"Well this is good," Carly said as the courtroom began to empty. "He's going to jail, he won't be driving for awhile…do you feel better now?"

"A little," Sam shrugged, still looking at Jacobs, who was talking to his lawyer now. "Hey, I'll catch up to you in the parking lot, okay?"

"What are you-"

"I'll just be a minute," Sam said.

Carly nodded. "Okay."

Sam waited until Carly had left the courtroom before she slowly got up and walked over to Jeffery Jacobs.

"Hey!" she said loudly, taking his attention away from his lawyer.

"Who's this lady?" Jacobs sneered.

"This lady is the _wife _of the guy you hit," Sam snapped, looking up at him with narrowed eyes.

"For the love of-Your husband lived, didn't he?" Jacobs said, rolling his eyes. "So why don't you and this court get over it, will you?"

Sam, silently cursing that there were still many court cops hanging around, clenched her fists.

"Do you know that when you hit him," Sam said in a scarily quiet voice. "That you caused one of his lungs to be completely punctured, and that it had to be removed? Do you know that you broke twelve of his bones? Do you know that you put him in a _coma_? That he had a thirty percent chance of living? That he has four kids at home that would've been left _fatherless _if your car had crashed into his five more centimeters to the right of him? Do you even _care_?"

Jacobs stared back at her, speechless.

"Have fun in jail," Sam mumbled, turning and leaving the courtroom.

"We ready to leave?" Carly asked as Sam came out to the parking lot, where Carly was waiting by her car.

"Uh-huh," Sam said, getting into the passenger seat.

…..

"Hey baby," Freddie said as Sam returned home later that day.

"Hey," Sam smiled as she saw all four of her and Freddie's kids sitting around him, coloring on his leg cast. "Wow, you guys look like you're having fun."

"Isn't it pretty mommy?" seven-year old Ashton asked, drawing a line of hearts on the cast.

"_Very_," Sam chuckled, sitting down next to Freddie.

"Where were you all day?" Freddie asked as he put his arm around her.

"Just helping Carly with some things," Sam said.

"Look, dad, I'm drawing Nug Nug on your cast!" Jason said proudly.

"Nice," Freddie grinned.

"You do realize you're gonna have to go to work with this cast now?" Sam whispered to him.

"Yeah, I know," Freddie shrugged. "But I don't mind."

Sam leaned her head over and gave him a long kiss.

"Ew!" all four kids shrieked.

"Go back to drawing!" Sam said, rolling her eyes as she pulled away from her husband.

"What was that for?" Freddie asked, smiling.

Sam shrugged. "Just because."


	319. Chapter 319

**AN-This takes place during iGoodbye. And if you guys have any more requests, make sure you let me know!**

…

_Postcard_

Sam walked back into the Shay's apartment, trying hard not to think about the idea that this would probably be the last time for awhile that she would be able to just waltz in and see her best friend; it would be a little hard to do that with her living in Italy. She figured Carly was done packing by now, or if not, she'd might as well help her out.

"Hey," she said to Spencer and his dad, who were sitting at the kitchen table.

"Hey Sam," Spencer said, his voice lacking its usual Spencerness.

"You here to see Carly?" Colonel Shay asked.

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "She up in her room?"  
"She should be," Spencer nodded.

"Thanks," Sam said, hurrying up the steps. She went up to Carly's room, but found it empty. A few suitcases were sitting packed on her bed, and Sam couldn't help but chuckle at Carly's now empty closet. It had always been so stuffed, yet Carly would constantly complain about having nothing to wear, much to Sam's amusement. She wondered whom she would go to now when she had to borrow a dress or some fancy heels…

_She probably went up to the studio_, Sam thought to herself as she gave Carly's room one last fleeting glance.

She went up to the next floor and saw that the studio lights were in fact on. She thought heard Freddie in there, and when she approached the glass door, she confirmed that she had been correct. Carly was in there too, just as she had guessed. They were huddled around Freddie's tech cart, and Sam heard Freddie saying something about Gibby and weasel shopping. She was just about to open the studio door and join them, when suddenly, she saw Carly lean forward and kiss him.

Sam stood there, absolutely shocked. Was she really seeing this? Were Carly and Freddie really kissing right before her very eyes? Part of her wanted to run the second their lips touched, but another part of seemed to be completely dysfunctional, and wouldn't allow her shaking legs to move from their spot. It took her a moment to realize what exactly the feeling that was now taking over her body was; heartbreak.

If she thought breaking up with Freddie that one night was rough, it was nothing compared to watching him kiss her best friend. Her chest felt like it was going to crumble in, and her stomach was clenching so much that she was almost certain she was going to throw up.

And then she saw them finally pull apart, and for one wild second, Sam got her hopes up; something that she had learned at a very young age to never do. Maybe Carly would apologize…say she didn't mean it…or Freddie would nicely tell her that he didn't like her like that anymore…

Sam saw them exchange quick, confused glances, and then Carly said, "So I'm gonna go get my bags and take them downstairs."

"Why don't I help you with those bags?" Freddie said, clearing his throat.

"Yeah that'd be great," Carly nodded.

Sam quickly crouched down behind one of the potted plants in the hallway outside the studio, praying that neither would see her.

_What the heck just happened? _Sam asked herself as she saw Carly leave the studio. _They just kissed…and now they're talking about carrying bags downstairs? What's up with that? Maybe…maybe it wasn't a real kiss then. Yeah…maybe it was just a goodbye kiss. Carly's a pretty affectionate person. And-And Freddie didn't ask her why she did it or anything, so maybe he sees it as a goodbye kiss too. Maybe he doesn't-_

But just then she saw Freddie coming out of the studio right behind Carly, and Sam's face fell when she saw him throw his hands up in what seemed to be victory.

_He liked it_, Sam realized, slowly standing up as her two friends left. _He-He finally got what he wanted…Carly. _

Sam walked into the dark, empty studio, collapsing into one of the beanbag chairs in there.

Sam rested her forehead on her knees, deep in thought.

It was Carly; he loved Carly. Not her.

Sam scoffed, shaking her head at her own foolishness. How could she have been so stupid to do this to herself again?

The past few weeks, much to her confusion, familiar feelings were beginning to resurface. Feelings similar to those she began feeling a week or two before that fateful lock-in last year…It took her awhile to realize it, but when she did, she had no choice but to accept the stone hard truth: she was falling for Freddie yet again.

She hadn't told anyone this, of course. Last year when she had been in the same boat she had been able to hide her feelings for the tech nerd for a while. Until the lock-in, when she had finally cracked, but she had hoped that she'd manage to be a little stronger this time.

But then, as the days began to pass, Sam had a wild thought. Maybe her liking Freddie wasn't so crazy. Sure, they had broken up, but it had been mutual, right? And he had told her that he loved her, and she had said it back, and there had been a definite implication that they both wanted to try the relationship out again. Was it possible that Freddie _wouldn't _totally reject her if she brought this up to him? Obviously _actually _bringing this up to him was harder than she thought, and she found herself repeatedly putting it off.

And then she had called him today, and he had asked her the same question that had been circling around her head for weeks.

'_You wanna get back together?'_

The words still echoed in her head. He had caught her completely off guard, and when she finally managed to work out a simple 'Do you?', he had changed the subject.

But the fact that he had asked had to mean something, right?

After she had hung up the phone with him, she wanted nothing more than to run to Carly and have one of those lame 'girl talks' her best friend was always trying to force on her. She knew she'd _eventually _have to tell Carly about her resurfaced feelings for Freddie if she wanted to get anywhere, and then seemed like the perfect time. But Carly had been dealing with her own problems with the father-daughter dance, and Sam didn't have the heart to force this problem onto her plate as well. In a couple of days, when she would be over the dance, Sam would talk to her. And then when Carly's dad showed up out of the blue, and Carly's dance dilemma disappeared, Sam was all ready to talk to her later that night.

But then, of course, _it _happened. For the first time in all those weeks, Freddie had not been the thing circling Sam's thoughts; it was the unfathomable idea of losing her best friend. Now, though, after witnessing that kiss, both haunting thoughts had full run on her mind. The boy she loved was in love with her best friend who was leaving for Italy in about thirty minutes. How was _anybody _supposed to deal with that?

She wasn't angry. After all, Carly didn't _know _how she felt about Freddie, otherwise Sam was sure she wouldn't have kissed him. And her and Freddie weren't a couple, he had the right to kiss whoever he wanted.

No, she wasn't angry, but she almost wished she were. Because she was an expert at dealing with anger, all she had to do was hit a few things and yell for a couple of minutes. This was sadness, and Sam was never any good at dealing with _that_.

…

Sam stood silently at the counter as Carly got ready to leave for the airport with her dad.  
This whole thing was surreal; if anyone had told her when she woke up this morning that in about twelve hours she'd be saying goodbye to Carly, who was leaving for Italy, she'd have thought they had just escaped from Troubled Waters.

Colonel Shay left in the elevator with Carly's things, leaving her, Spencer, Gibby, and Freddie to say their goodbyes to his daughter.

Sam glanced over at Freddie. Him and Carly weren't _exactly _acting like they were a couple now…so what did that kiss mean? She couldn't ask them, as she suspected she wasn't supposed to have seen that kiss.

"Goodbye you guys," Carly said. And as she said those three words, everything suddenly felt real to Sam. This was it, Carly was going.

"I'll ride down with you," Sam said heavily.

The five of them shared one last group hug, Sam trying not to think about the fact that Freddie's arm was around her at this very moment. She wanted only to focus on one thing at a time right now. Otherwise she was sure she'd break down.

The group separated, and Carly and Sam stood alone in the elevator.

"I love you guys," Carly said as the elevator door began to slide down.

Sam looked down at her feet, wondering how long she could hold back her tears.

The elevator door closed, and for a second, the best friends were silent. Sam slowly reached into her back pocket and pulled out her blue remote; she had never put it away after their last iCarly.

"Why don't you take this with you?" Sam said, handing it to Carly. "Just push a button if you ever need a laugh…a cheer. _Random Dance_."

Carly looked at the remote. "Aw Sam," Carly said, pulling her into a hug.

Sam hugged her back, feeling the tears welling in her eyes.

"Hey!" a voice said as the door slid back open "Who stopped the elevat-"

"Get out!" Sam screamed.

...

"Well…I'll call you when I get into Italy," Carly said as her dad loaded the last of her luggage into his car.

"If you ever need to know how to say something in Italian," Sam said, offering a small smile. "You know who to call."

"Thanks," Carly chuckled. "And I'll send you pictures of all the cute guys up there. Or maybe I can send you one of those cool Italian postcards or something."

"You better," Sam said.

"Carly," Colonel Shay said gently. "We need to get going if we want to make our flight."

"Okay," Carly nodded.

Her and Sam shared one last hug.

"Be good, okay?" Carly said.

Sam nodded. "Yeah, I'll try."

"And I'll be back to visit soon," Carly said as she opened the passenger side of the car. "And Spencer's probably going to fly down to visit us soon; maybe you guys can come with him. And we'll text and call and web chat all the time. And-"

"You're gonna miss your flight, kid," Sam said weakly.

"Oh, right," Carly said. "Well…bye Sam."

Sam stood in the parking lot, watching Colonel Shay's car head out onto the street towards the airport.

Sam felt tears dripping onto her cheeks. Carly was gone.

And now that that had happened, there was nothing left to take her mind off of Freddie.

It wasn't just Carly she lost tonight, she realized. It was Freddie too.

Sam didn't head back up to the apartment. Instead she walked towards her new, parked motorcycle, hopped on, turned in the keys and began to ride. She rode out of the parking lot and down the road, in deep thought.

What did she do now? Where did she go? Home? No one was there.

She thought to herself that if Carly was here, she'd be able to handle the Freddie situation better. As much as she hated to admit it, sometimes a sleepover with her best friend where they spent the whole night talking about boys was just what she needed. And then she thought how much easier it would be to be able to deal with Carly leaving if she had Freddie.

Both instances were horrible; but she was no stranger to things turning for the worse for her. But both of these events coupled together in one night? She couldn't deal with it.

She stopped at a red light, letting a person cross the crosswalk.

There was nothing here for her. Seattle might as well be empty.

_So then where do I go? _Sam asked herself again.

The light changed and Sam began to ride again.

_I guess wherever I end up_, she decided, heading towards the main road. _Maybe I'll have better luck there. _


	320. Chapter 320

_Carbon_

"No, Sam, you can't just multiply those things together," Freddie said.

"You said I could!" Sam exclaimed.

"They have to be in the same units though," Freddie told her. "You have one amount in joules and another amount in kilocalories!"

"Aren't calories in food?"

"Yes, but they're a chemistry unit too," Freddie explained. "See, a calories is the amount of energy that-"

"Hey," Sam said, cutting him off as she scooted closer to her boyfriend. "How about instead of boring me to death with all that chiz…we do a little lip exercise."

"Um…well, you-you have your big chemistry test next week," Freddie said weakly as Sam wrapped her arms around her neck. "We really should be working on preparing you for that."

"Uh-huh," Sam nodded, breathing heavily into his ear.

"I'm serious," Freddie said, almost breathlessly. "I-I promised Carly I'd have you through chapter seven of the chemistry textbook, and we've barely made it through three."

"Yeah," Sam whispered as she began to gently kiss the tip of his nose.

"We-We need to-" Freddie said, but as his girlfriend began nipping at his earlobe, he let all reason flow from his body.

"Oh what the heck," he mumbled, grabbing her and wrapping his arms around her as they couple began to make out.

"Hey," Carly said, coming downstairs into her living room. "How goes the chemistry-Oh come on!"

"We-We were just taking a break," Freddie said quickly as they pulled apart.

"Yeah, you can't expect me to just spend the whole day studying straight through," Sam said.

"Have you _really _been studying?" Carly asked. "Or have you just been trying to rope Freddie into your make-out sessions again?"

"Well, you see Carly," Sam said. "I think that should technically still count as chemistry…"

"Ha, ha, very cute," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"She's made a decent amount of progress, actually," Freddie said. "Look, I'll show you. Sam? Name the seven diatomic elements."

"Um…Hydrogen, Chlorine, Nitrogen, Fluorine, Oxygen, Bromine, and…Iodine?" Sam recited.

"Wow," Carly said, impressed.

"And what are the products of any combustion reaction?" Freddie asked.

"Carbon dioxide and water!" Sam said proudly.

"Well…okay," Carly said. "I guess you've earned a little smooch time with your boyfriend. Besides, you _do _have a whole week before the test."

"So I can be done for today?" Sam asked hopefully.

"Yes," Carly grinned.

"Yes!" Sam cheered, throwing her fists into the air. "Finally!"

"And as promised," Freddie chuckled, pulling out his wallet. "A fried chicken dinner on me."

"Thanks, baby," Sam smiled, giving him a quick kiss as she grabbed the bills from him. "I'll be back in a minute."

"You bribed her to study with food?" Carly asked Freddie, amused. "What? Your lips weren't enough?"

"There are some things that only fried chicken can get done," Freddie said.

Carly laughed. "Well as long as she passes her test…she needs to get at least a C or else she'll have to go to summer school, and we both know that would be a disaster."

"She will, Sam comes through when she needs to," Freddie said.

"I know," Carly nodded. "And maybe I can convince her to study for another hour tonight during our sleepover."  
"Sounds like a real riveting sleepover," Freddie said.

"Oh shush," Carly smiled. "Mine and Sam's sleepovers are the best. You're just jealous that you're not invited because you're a boy."

"Yeah, whatever," Freddie smirked. "What do you two even _do_?"

"Oh you know, just girl stuff," Carly shrugged. "We pig out on junk food, paint each others nails, talk about boys-"

"Wait what?" Freddie frowned. "You talk about _boys_?"

"Duh," Carly nodded.

"Like…boys like Spencer and Gibby?" Freddie asked.

"Ew, no way," Carly cringed. "Boys that we're interested in."

"So…who does Sam talk about?" Freddie asked.

"Well lately she's been real chatty about this guy on the baseball team…"

"What?!" Freddie yelped.

"Relax," Carly laughed. "I was kidding. Of course she talks about _you_, her boyfriend."

"Oh," Freddie said, sighing in relief. "What-What kind of things does she say?"

"I'm not going to tell you!" Carly said. "That's like, the first rule of sleepovers! You don't tell what the other girl says! Ever!"

"Come on, Carls," Freddie begged. "Just tell me what she says about me?"

"Why do you need to know so badly?" Carly asked.

"Because, you're the one who brought _up _that you guys sit around and discuss me!"

"So what?" Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Please," Freddie moaned. "Don't do this to me!"

"I'm going to get some iced tea," Carly said, slightly amused.

"Well at least tell me if it's good things or bad things she says about me," Freddie said, following Carly to the fridge. "Wait…if she talks about these things to _you _and not _me,_ then they've got to be bad! Oh man! What is she saying? Does she not like our date nights? My cologne? Am I not a good kisser?"

"Okay, you need to _chill_," Carly said firmly.

"I can't now! You've got me all worked up!"

"You're ridiculous," Carly said.

"Well how would you like it if me and the guy _you _were dating became all buddy-buddy and I told you that he talks about you, but I refused to tell you what he says?" Freddie snapped.

Carly sighed. "Okay…do you _really _want to know what it is that Sam says about you when we're hanging out?"

"Yes!"

"Well, first of all," Carly said. "You should know that there are some nights when you're _all _she ever talks about. And if you two weren't so dang _perfect_, it'd actually be really annoying."

"But what does she _say_?" Freddie asked.

Carly gave him a small smile. "She talks about how much she loves you. She says that you treat her like a princess and that you're the first guy she's been with that she really feels a connection with. She'll talk about all the sappy romantic stuff that you do for her that she says she pretends not to be that into in front of you, but really does love. And then she'll say that she doesn't know what she would do if she didn't have you, because you mean so much to her.

Freddie blinked. "Sam, Sam _Puckett_, really says all that stuff about me?"  
Carly nodded. "She does."

"Wow…" Freddie said softly.

"I'm telling you, a good sleepover can bring out even _her _chick side," Carly grinned. "Of course after hearing about what a great boyfriend you are, I usually have to go grab a second pint of ice cream when I remember that I'll probably die alone-"

"How great is that?" Freddie said, smiling.  
"Well thanks," Carly said.

"No, not that," Freddie said quickly. "I mean…it's nice to find out that Sam really says those things about me when we're apart."

"Come on, you knew she loved you before," Carly pointed out.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "But still."

"Mama's back with the grub!" Sam said, bursting back into the apartment with a grease soaked bag. "Fry-O Mania had a sale on double fried wings, so I got us all some. Oh, and here's your change, Fredwad. It was more, but then I passed a hot dog stand on the way over…"

"Thanks," Freddie said, walking over to her and kissing her. "I love you Sam. So much."

"I love you too?" Sam frowned. "What up with the mush?"

Freddie shrugged. "I just wanted to say it, that's all."

"Well alright then…nub," Sam said, rolling her eyes. But as Freddie headed into the kitchen to grab plates, he snuck a look over his shoulder and saw Sam beaming as she took a bite out of one of the wings.


	321. Chapter 321

**AN-Hey, so I just realized that I never answered a question that one of you sent in awhile ago. I'm sorry, I guess it just slipped my mind. But someone wanted to know what Sam and Freddie's kids look like. I didn't find anything online that matched what I imagined them looking like, so I'll just tell you the descriptions:**

**Jason is blonde with brown eyes, and is taller than both Sam and Freddie, at about five feet nine inches. **

**Emma and Ashton also have blonde hair and brown eyes, and are about the same height as Sam. Their hair is straight, unlike hers.**

**Tyler has brown hair and blue eyes, unlike his siblings. He's very muscular, since he plays football and hockey, and is the tallest in the family, even though he's the baby, and grows to be about six four.**

…

_Village_

"Ugh, why do we have to do this again?" Sam moaned as her, Carly and Freddie headed up the stairs of a preschool.

"Because, you need forty hours of community service to graduate high school!" Carly said for the fifth time. "And so far, you've done a whopping zero."

"You guys haven't done forty hours either," Sam said.

"Yes, we have," Carly said. "I volunteered at a homeless shelter."  
"And I volunteered at the hospital with my mom," Freddie added. "Even though I was forced to get decontamination baths every night afterwards…"

"So see? Now it's your turn," Carly said to Sam. "All you have to do is help out with the kids here for a few hours each day for the next two weeks and then your done! And me, being the _awesome _best friend that I am, and Freddie, being your wonderful boyfriend, have even signed up to do it with you."

"Couldn't you have found somewhere a little more exciting than a preschool?" Sam sighed.

"Like where?" Freddie asked her

"I dunno…the zoo?"

"Oh no, you're not going back to any zoo for a _long _time," Carly said firmly. "Not after that whole zebra incident."

"You're overreacting," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Come on, Sam, we're here at the preschool," Freddie told his girlfriend. "So let's just get your hours done here. And it'll be fun, getting to play around with the little kids."

Sam didn't reply, but crossed her arms tightly as the three entered the preschool.

"Hi," Carly said brightly to the woman working at the front desk. "Our names are Carly Shay, Sam Puckett and Freddie Benson. We're supposed to be volunteering here today."

"Any of you got a prison record?" the woman asked lazily.

"Um…" Carly said nervously, glancing at Sam. "Are-Are you going to check?"

"Probably not," the lady replied.

"Then nope!" Carly said quickly.

"Okay, good," the lady said, handing over some forms. "Then fill these out and then you can start."

"Writing _and _working?" Sam said. "Are you _kidding _me?"

"You give laziness a whole new meaning, baby," Freddie chuckled. "It's five lines that you have to fill out. I _think _you can handle that without your hand falling off from over exertion."

Once the teens had filled out the forms, the woman at the desk led them back to a room. They could hear loud yells and screaming before she had even opened the door.

"Okay boys and girls…" the teacher, who looked like she was about to cry, said as they walked in. "How about we take out our crayons and color-"

"Crayon fight!" one of the little girls yelled, throwing a handful of crayons into the air, and the others soon followed.

"Well," Carly said, ducking as a tickle-me-pink crayon soared over her head. "They seem delightful."

"Yeah, they're vicious," the lady nodded. "Hey! Melinda! You get a break, the volunteers are here!"

"Oh thank heavens," the teacher said, hurrying over. "Some _brilliant _parent thought they'd send in cupcakes for their kid's birthday. Dang kids have been riding out their sugar highs for hours; I don't think they'll ever crash!"

"Um, hang on," Sam frowned. "You're leaving us _alone_ with these kids?"

"Yup," the two ladies said together.

"We're still in high school though!" Freddie pointed out. "Isn't there some sort of law that says that a qualified _adult _needs to be watching over a room filled with twenty some preschool children?"

"Yeah, probably," the teacher shrugged.

"Let's go," the lady from the front desk said. "I'll start warming up the fajitas!"

"Yeah, real good call making us come here," Sam snapped as the two adults ran out of the room.

"I-I'm sure it won't be that bad," Carly reasoned as the kids began jumping onto their chairs. "All we have to do is quiet them down."

"How?" Freddie asked.

"Um…hey! Guys!" Carly said loudly, standing on a nearby chair. "Guys?"

But the kids couldn't hear her over their own cries.

"Guys!" Freddie said, trying to help her. "Um, we-we're here to-"

But again, he was ignored as the children continued to run around.

"Quiet!" Sam screamed in her infamous Sam Puckett voice, making the kids fall silent instantly, realizing for the first time that their teacher had been replaced by three teenagers.

"Okay then," Carly said. "Hi! I'm Carly. Me and my two friends Sam and Freddie are here to play with you guys today. Doesn't that sound like fun?"

"Yeah!" the kids all cheered.

"Aw, see?" Freddie whispered to his girlfriend. "They're happy to see us."

"Well I have some fun activities planned for us," Carly smiled, pulling out a pastel colored index card. "We can do some arts and crafts, or we can play a little hide-and-seek, or maybe if you're up for it, we can read some cool stories and-"

"Battle tag!" one of the kids yelled, cutting Carly off. The rest of the kids cheered in agreement, and began racing all around, trying to tackle each other.

"No! No running!" Carly said. "Hey! Don't eat that!"

"This is crazy!" Freddie said, helping Carly down from the chair.

"Yeah, no chiz!" Sam exclaimed. "So can we please ditch?"

"No!" Carly exclaimed.

"You need to get your hours done," Freddie said. "And we can't just leave all these kids alone. We'll just have to somehow calm them down."

"I'll go try and get that group of kids over there to stop bouncing on the teddy bears," Carly sighed.

"I'll go stop those kids over there from sticking gum all over the place," Freddie said, hurrying off.

"And I'll stay here and catch up on some text messages," Sam said as the other two ran off.

…

It took nearly an hour for Carly and Freddie to get the kids all under control and playing peacefully with the toys.

"That," Carly said breathlessly, sliding down into one of the chairs. "Was by far, the _worst _experience of my life."

"Yeah, I hear you," Freddie mumbled.

"I know, it's rough," Sam said, looking up from her phone.

Freddie and Carly glared at her.

"You haven't done a thing!" Carly exclaimed.

"Yeah, well," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I'll start tomorrow…maybe."

"Whatever," Carly sighed, getting back to her feet. "I'm gonna go try and see if I can wash some of this glitter out of my hair."

"Sam," Freddie said as Carly headed towards the restroom. "You need to do _something _today before we leave."

"Hey, I just beat my high score of Fortress Run," Sam told him. "I say I've been _quite _productive."

"Sam," Freddie said firmly. "Seriously. You're getting credit for these hours, you need to at least work a _little _for them. The kids are calm now…why don't you go play with those kids over there? The ones building with the blocks."

"I hate blocks," Sam said.

"Sam," Freddie said. "Please? For me?"

"Ugh…fine!" Sam conceded. "But don't think now that we're dating you can just pull that line on me whenever. That's my turf!"

Sam walked over to the group of kids playing with the blocks and sat down with them.

"Yo," she said as the kids looked at her.

"Are you gonna finally _do _something?" one of the kids asked.

"_Yes_," Sam snapped bitterly.

"Can you look at this scab?" a little boy asked her, showing her his knee. "It looks infected."

"No! Get your scabby knee away from me!" Sam said. She looked over her shoulder at Freddie, who, much to her dismay, was still watching her, meaning she couldn't sneak away. "So, um…what are you guys building?"

"We're building a happy, peaceful village," one of the little girls said. "With no monsters or mean people."

"Oh _kay _that's got to be the stupidest thing I've ever heard," Sam said. "What kind of village doesn't even have a monster or bad guy trying to destroy it?"

"You-You think my village is stupid?" the girl whimpered, beginning to cry.

"Um, no…no, don't-don't cry," Sam said quickly. "I-I mean…it's…_cool_."

"Hey, what do you think this white stuff on my scab is?" the boy asked, showing Sam his scab again. "Do you think I need to have this looked at by a dermatologist?"

"I don't even know what that is!"

"Will you tell me a story?" another boy asked her.

"Um, sure," Sam said, scooting further away from the boy with the scab and closer to the little girl who was still crying. "What kind of story you want, kid?"

"A good one!"

"Fine," Sam said. "Um…once upon a time there was a bunch of noisy preschoolers who got lost in a forest and could never find their way out and wound up being eaten by aliens. The End."

"That was the worst story ever!" the boy pouted.

"Well it's all you get!" Sam said. "And quit crying, will you!" she said, turning the little girl.

"No!" the girl wailed.

"Play checkers with me!" another kid said, grabbing onto Sam's arm.

"Play dollies with me!" another said, grabbing her other arm.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, off!" Sam said, quickly scrambling to her feet. "I don't like to be clung to!"

"Will you look at this questionable mosquito bite on my stomach?" the scab boy asked Sam, lifting up his shirt.

"Yeah, I'm done here," Sam said, hurrying back over towards Freddie.

"Wow," Freddie said. "You were over there for a grand total of four minutes and I already see one girl in tears."

"Well those kids are all crazy!" Sam defended.

"Do you guys like my picture?" a little boy asked, walking over to the couple with a piece of paper with a bunch of scribbles on it.

"Yes," Freddie smiled. "It's very nice."

"It looks like a rainbow threw up on it," Sam said bluntly.

The little boy's lip began to quiver and he ran off as he burst into tears.

"Sam!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Oh come on, that picture looked like something a diseased monkey would draw!" Sam said.

"So? You don't tell a kid his art work's bad!" Freddie said.

"But it was," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I can't believe we seriously have to keep coming back here for the next two weeks?"

"You know," Freddie said. "Maybe it _would _be a good idea if you found another place to volunteer."

"Thank you!" Sam said.

"Yeah, someplace with no kids," Freddie nodded. "Because, let's face it, baby. You are _horrible _with kids."  
Sam's face suddenly fell. "Horrible?"

"Oh yeah," Freddie nodded. "You can _not _handle kids at all."

"I-I'm not terrible…am I?" Sam asked softly.

"Pfft, the worst!" Freddie chuckled.

Sam didn't reply, and looked down at her feet.

"Okay, you guys," Carly said, joining the two. "I just found a few CD's. What do you say we try to play freeze dance or something with them?"

"Whatever," Sam mumbled. "I-I'm gonna go, um, out-out in the hall for a sec."

"Is she okay?" Carly frowned as her best friend hurried out of the classroom.

"Um…I don't know," Freddie said, confused. "I'll go check on her. You'll be okay by yourself, right?"

"No!"

"Cool, thanks Carls," Freddie said, quickly running after Sam.

As Freddie walked out into the hallway, he spotted Sam sitting against the wall.

"Hey," he said, sitting down next to her. "What's up? Why'd you run out?"

Sam shrugged.

"Are you okay?" Freddie asked, looking at her face. She had an expression that he had only seen once or twice.

"I'm fine," Sam mumbled.

"Right, well, I'm not stupid enough to fall for the whole 'I'm fine' thing," Freddie said. "I know that means you're _not _fine. So what's bugging you?"  
Sam sighed. "Do you think I'm really that bad with kids?"

"Um, well, there _are_ two kids in there crying now…" Freddie said slowly.

Sam pursed her lips, deep in thought. "So," she said after a moment. "Does that mean…do you think I'd be a good mom?"

"Huh?" Freddie frowned, caught completely off guard. "What-What's that got to do with anything?"

"Just…answer the question," Sam said softly. "Honestly."  
"Um, well…"

"Come on," Sam said. "I'm not gonna get mad at you or anything, I swear. Just-Just tell me the truth."

"Okay, well, _honestly_…no," Freddie admitted. "Right now…you-you don't exactly spell out mother-of-the-year."

"Oh," Sam said, looking down at her lap.

"But, you're _not _a mom, Sam," Freddie said, still confused about this conversation. "So why does it matter if you'd be a good mom or not?"

"Because!" Sam said.

"Because why?"

"Because someday…someday I'd sort of like to…be one," Sam muttered.

"Oh," Freddie said, a bit more gently. "Well…that's great then! Who cares whether I think you'd be a good mom or not then? If you want kids then-"

"What do you mean who cares what you think?" Sam frowned. "I-Never mind."

"No, what?" Freddie asked.

"Nothing!"

"Say it!"

"No!"

"Wait a minute…" Freddie said, a smile sneaking onto his face. "Are you, Sam Puckett, imagining _our _future kids together?"

"No!" Sam snapped, blushing.

"Yeah, you are," Freddie grinned.

"Do you want to have to explain to those kids why you have a black eye?"

"Sam," Freddie said. "It's okay. I'm not freaked out or anything. I think it's sort of nice that you think about that stuff. I mean, I love you. If I had to pick anyone to start a family with someday, it'd be you, obviously."

"You _just _said I'd be a lousy mom," Sam pointed out.

"Yeah, now you would be," Freddie nodded. "But you're also seventeen right now. It's okay for you not to be the _best_ with kids. But you'll learn; you have plenty of time. Besides, I'm sure taking care of your own kid will come a lot more naturally to you than taking care of random ones."

"You think?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," Freddie smiled, helping Sam back up. He leaned down to kiss her. "And I'm serious, Sam. Not today, but one day, you'll be a great mom. Now come on, we'd better get back in there before those kids destroy Carly."


	322. Chapter 322

_Holiday_

"Baby, will you take me back?" Spencer sang happily as he unlocked his apartment door, jamming out with his headphones on. "There, I said it, I-Ah!"

"Oh, hey," Sam said as her and Freddie, who had been wrapped around each other a second ago, looked up.

"I thought you said I wouldn't have to walk in on any of your little make-out sessions anymore," Spencer said.

"Well you were supposed to be at the grocery store for another twenty minutes!" Freddie pointed out.

"Oh, well pardon me for coming home to _my _home a little ahead of schedule," Spencer snapped. "It's not my fault I got kicked out of Hey Foods again."

"What'd you do this time?" Sam sighed.

"Nothing! Well…I may or may not have accidently knocked my cart into a display of oystamato juice and spilled it all over aisles four, five, and six, causing three customers to fall and bruise."

"Isn't oystamato juice that juice you said taste like sweaty socks and broken promises?" Freddie asked.

"Yes!" Spencer nodded. "So it deserved to spill!"

"It's the tomato in it," Sam said. "You should never trust tomatoes; no one ever knows if it's a fruit or a vegetable! I have two cousins who won't even speak to each other anymore because one went and put a whole bunch of tomatoes in a fruit salad."

"Interesting family," Freddie chuckled.

"Hey, speaking of family, where's Carly?" Spencer asked. "You know, my little sister who actually _lives _here?"

"Her and Gibby stayed after school at the library to work on some history project they're doing together," Sam said. "But I think they're supposed to be back soon."

Right on cue, the apartment door opened again and Carly and Gibby came in.

"You guys, guess what?" Carly grinned.

"They're bringing back deep fried Fat Cakes?" Sam asked hopefully.

"Um, no, I still think the FDA's claiming that those cause intestinal problems," Carly said.

"What happened?" Freddie asked.

"Well, as me and Gibby were leaving the library," Carly said. "The company that's supplying the caps and gowns for graduation delivered everything to the front office!"

"Yeah, and we got to pick ours up," Gibby said, pulling out a long black gown and square hat from his backpack. "Man, how good am I gonna look in this?"

"I got yours too, don't worry," Carly told Sam and Freddie, tossing them their caps and gowns. "We'll have to get some pictures of us all dressed up soon. My dad wants some, and I should probably send a few to Yakima for my granddad."

"I can't believe graduation's next week," Freddie said, examining his cap and gown. "How crazy is that?"

"It's so exciting," Carly agreed. "And Sam, remember, we're going dress shopping tomorrow. I need something cute to wear under my gown."

"What? We're supposed to wear something _under _our gowns?" Gibby frowned.

"Um, yes," Freddie nodded. "Like maybe _pants_?"

"Well, _that's _a bummer," Gibby mumbled.

"Sorry to disappoint you," Carly chuckled. She turned back to Sam. "So I'm thinking we head to the mall around ten, and then if we don't find anything there, we can try this cute little shopping plaza by the park."

"Whatever," Sam shrugged.

"You okay?" Freddie asked his girlfriend.

"Yeah," Sam shrugged. "I just don't see why all you guys are so pumped up about graduation. I mean, it's not like a huge holiday or anything; it's just a bunch of kids walking across the stage to get a diploma."

"Sam, graduation's a huge deal!" Carly said.

"Yeah, I still remember mine," Spencer nodded. "I was walking across stage to get my diploma and shake my principal's hand when I wound up tripping on the edge of my gown and falling into five people in front of me…but only two wound up in the hospital!"

"You're seriously not looking forward to graduating from high school?" Freddie asked Sam.

"I'm looking forward to being _done_ with school," Sam said. "But I don't see why there needs to be a big ceremony."

"But I thought your Uncle Carmine actually managed to get parole just to come see you," Carly said. "And Melanie's coming up, and your mom just got that fancy new tattoo."

"Eh, they're all just surprised I even finished high school," Sam shrugged.

"They're proud of you, just like we are," Freddie said. "I mean, come on, let's face. You didn't exactly have the _easiest _time getting here. But you did, that's something to celebrate, baby."

"Yeah, yeah, if you say so," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Hey, I'm hungry. That pizza from last night still in the fridge."

"Should be," Carly nodded.

"Well, speaking of graduation," Freddie said. "I need to get home so I can finish up my speech."

"You're doing a speech?" Spencer asked. "How come?"  
"Because _Freddie_ happens to be our class's valedictorian," Carly smiled.

"What's that? Some kind of surgeon?" Gibby asked.

"No! We've told you a million times!" Carly said, rolling her eyes. "It means that out of all three hundred seniors that are graduating, _he _has the best GPA."

"Yeah, which means his nub status has just broken the record," Sam said playfully, coming back over to her boyfriend, putting an arm around him.

"Wow, your mom must be real happy," Spencer said.

"No, not really," Freddie replied. "She was sort of hoping I'd get held back or something so I'd have one more year of living at home with her."

"Ah," Spencer nodded.

"Well, I'll see you guys later," Freddie said, giving Sam a quick kiss. "Unless my mom tries to glue me to a chair again so I can't leave her…"

…

"Well, here's to our last night as high school students!" Carly said, handing Sam, Freddie and Gibby bottles of root beer. "Because tomorrow, after we walk across that stage, we'll officially be graduates!"

"Oh yeah!" Freddie cheered.

"No more pant restrictions!" Gibby said as the four clinked their bottles together.

"We're gonna be able to do whatever we want," Carly grinned. "We can do anything once we're out there in the world on our own!"

The four clinked their bottles together again.

"So you guys up for a movie?" Carly asked. "We shouldn't be do anything too crazy tonight, we have to be at graduation tomorrow at nine."

"Yeah, a movie's cool," Sam nodded. "But um…I'm gonna run upstairs and get something quick first, okay?"

"Okay," Carly said. "I'll pop some popcorn."

"And I'll go compare your liquid soaps," Gibby said.

Freddie watched as Sam headed upstairs. Something seemed off with her all night. So, being the concerned boyfriend he was, he followed her.

She had gone up to the studio and Freddie saw her sitting in one of the beanbag chairs. The studio was pretty much empty; they had done their last web show a week ago.

"Sam?" Freddie said softly.

"Oh, hey," Sam said, turning to look over her shoulder at him. She shifted on the beanbag chair so that the two of them would be able to fit on it.

"What's on your mind?" Freddie asked, sitting down next to her, wrapping his arms around her.

"Just…stuff," Sam mumbled, resting her head on his shoulder.

"You're nervous for tomorrow, aren't you?" Freddie said knowingly.

"No…"

"Sam-"

"Okay, maybe a little," Sam admitted.

"It's fine to be nervous, Sam," Freddie told her. "I mean, graduation's a big step. But after it's done, you have your whole life in front of you. You can do whatever you want-"

"And what exactly am I supposed to do?" Sam sighed. "Huh? What am I supposed to do with my life?"

"What do you mean?" Freddie frowned. "You're going to Washington State with Carly."

"I don't even have a major yet, though," Sam pointed out.

"Well you'll figure that out," Freddie said.

"And what if I don't?" Sam said. "What then? What if I get to college and I realize that I'm really not cut out for anything in the real world? I mean, yeah, high school was boring and stupid, but at least there I knew what I was supposed to do because people were always telling me what to do. I had to do math, I had to do history, blah, blah, blah. But now I'm supposed to figure it all out! And with me being in charge of that, it's only a matter of time before I fail."

"Baby," Freddie said gently, kissing the top of her head. "You're not going to fail."

"But I-"

"So you don't have your _entire _life planned out," Freddie said. "Big deal. No one does! Heck, all I know I want to do going into MIT is that I want to do something with computers. There are _thousands _of things that I could do like that, and I haven't even begun to narrow it down yet. And Carly's not one hundred percent set on a major, remember. Right now I know she's leaning towards English, but she's also been talking about maybe doing something with fashion, or going into communications. And Gibby…well, _no one's _sure what that kid's going to do, but he'll figure it out. Like you will. You're going to go to Washington State in the Fall, take a few classes that you think are interesting, and in no time, you'll have found a major. And then pretty soon, you'll figure out what you want to do for a living, and then everything else will fall into place."

"It just…it just sounds so hard," Sam sighed.

"Yeah, it is," Freddie nodded. "And it's supposed to be. But that doesn't mean you're not going to make it. Just remember, every other person who's walking across that stage tomorrow is freaking out just like you. This whole thing…it's just part of life."

Sam gave him a small smile. "Maybe you should change your major to 'cheesy advice'."

Freddie chuckled. "Just…don't freak yourself out, Sam, okay? You're going to be fine."

…

As Sam sat in the sea of graduates the next day, watching her boyfriend up on stage, giving his valedictorian speech, she couldn't help but feel a sense of pride.

"-And as we embark on this next stage in our life," Freddie said, wrapping up his speech. "It's important for us all to remember that it's us who determines what happens next. Everyone has been telling us for so long that soon, we'd have out chance to make it. Well, that time has come. With high school conquered, the world is ours. So as you walk across this stage, remember, this is it. This is your time."

Everyone cheered, and Sam could hear Mrs. Benson shouting from the audience "Don't leave me, Fredward!"

Sam glanced back over her shoulder at Carly, who was sitting a few rows back with the other S's. Her best friend gave her a smile of encouragement.

And then Principle Franklin stood up and began calling up the students to receive their diplomas.

Freddie was the first of them to cross the stage, beaming as he was handing his diploma. And then Gibby went, and Sam could see a pair of bright gold pants peaking out from underneath his gown; it was the only pair that the three of them had been able to convince Gibby to wear.

And then after probably the longest wait of her life, it was Sam's turn. When her name was called, she could hear her Uncle Carmine yelling loudly and she saw Spencer's light up sign that he had made to congratulate the four teens in the crowd.

"Congratulations, Sam," Principal Franklin smiled at her, shaking her hand and giving her the diploma. "You really worked hard for this."

"Thanks, Ted," Sam whispered.

Carly was the last one of their group to walk across the stage, and Sam made sure to scream extra-loud for her best friend.

And then once the last students had crossed the stage, Principal Franklin took the microphone again.  
"Without further ado," he said, looking proudly out at the sea of his students. "I present to you, Ridgeway High School's fifty-third graduating class. Congratulations, and the best of luck you all."

…..

"We did it!" Carly grinned as the four met up after the ceremony. She pulled them all into a group hug. "I can't believe this, we're graduates!"

"Feels good," Gibby grinned.

"Nice speech, baby," Sam said, standing on her toes to give him a kiss.

"Thanks," Freddie smiled.

"My dad sent fancy Italian frames for our diplomas," Carly said. "We can put them in later. Sam, we should bring them to college in the Fall and hang in our dorm!"

"Yeah, totally," Sam agreed.

"This baby's going right above my cat's litter box," Gibby said. "To rub it in his face!"

Carly, Sam and Freddie gave him an odd look.

"Well, I'm hanging this up in my dorm too," Freddie said. "I think it would look nice right above my bed."

"So," Carly said. "What now?"

The four were silent for a moment.

"Well," Freddie said, breaking the silence. "I don't know about you guys, but graduating's really fueled my appetite. Who's up for some smoothies and burgers at the Groovy Smoothie?"

"I'm in," Sam said at once.

"Definitely," Carly nodded. "But we shouldn't eat too much…Spencer sort of let it slip this morning during breakfast that he's planning us a surprise graduation party."

"Awesome, I love surprise parties!" Gibby said.

"Yeah, when you're not ruining them," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Yeah, the last three surprise parties we've tried to throw, you wound up messing up," Freddie nodded. "How many times do we have to tell you, putting your hands over your face doesn't count as hiding."


	323. Chapter 323

_Weird_

"Aw, Emma, she's adorable!" Ashton cooed, looking down at her new niece.

"Duh, she is," Emma said.

"She looks just like you," Clarissa grinned. "Except for her eyes; she has Quincy's eyes."

"Yeah, that's true," Carly agreed, looking down at the baby. "And speaking of Quincy, where is he?"

"He went to go get Tasha and Gib," Sam said, holding the baby in her arms. "Their car broke down after Gibby tried to change the motor oil himself, and would up filling it with shoe polish."

"And where's dad?" Ashton asked. "He's missing seeing his granddaughter for the first time!"

"He said he's getting off from work as soon as he can, so he's probably on his way home now," Sam said.

"Well can I at least hold my niece, mom?" Ashton asked. "You've been hogging her for the entire hour she's been here."

"Fine," Sam mumbled, handing the infant over.

"I think she's hungry," Emma said. "I'll go make her a bottle."

"Nah, sit," Sam said, getting to her feet. "I'll do it."

"I'll help," Carly said.

The two headed into the kitchen.

"So," Carly said. "Is it weird, being a grandma and all? You feel different?"

"I feel old," Sam muttered.

"You're not even fifty," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Yeah, I know, but I bet when Clarissa has her first kid, you'll feel the same way," Sam smirked.

"Probably," Carly sighed. "But she just broke up with her perfectly good boyfriend last week, so who knows _when _I'm gonna get grandkids."

"She's only twenty three!"

"Not the point," Carly said. "The point is-"

"Hey, are they here?" Freddie asked, hurrying into the kitchen from the back door.

"Yeah, they just got here an hour ago," Sam said, giving him a quick kiss as she screwed the top on the bottle of formula she just made. "Come on, you've got to see our granddaughter, Fredlump."

She led Freddie back into the living room.

"Hi dad!" Emma said, giving her father a hug.

"Hey, Em," Freddie smiled, kissing the top of her head. "I'm so glad you're here! I've missed you so much."

"And here's your granddaughter," Emma smiled, taking her daughter from Ashton. "Say hello to Savannah Michelle Gibson."

"Hi Savannah," Freddie smiled down at the newborn. "I'm your grandpa."

"Isn't she so cute and tiny?" Sam said, handing her husband the bottle so he could feed her.

"Yeah…she's perfect," Freddie nodded. "I forgot how tiny they are when they're only three weeks old…of course if _someone _would consider moving back to Seattle, I would've seen her when she was even tinnier. I'm telling you, Em, the housing market here is really booming, much better than stupid old Oregon's. You and Quincy could find a place here in no time."

"Dad, we're not moving back to Seattle," Emma said, rolling her eyes.

"Well I can dream, can't I?" Freddie sighed.

"So Clarissa," Carly said, taking a quick pic of Freddie and Savannah on her Pearphone. "Just a rough estimate…when can I be expecting _my _first grandkid?"

"Ugh! _This _again?" Clarissa moaned. "For the millionth time, mom, you'll get grandkids when I'm good and ready!"

"But can't you just-"

Just then the front door of the Benson house opened, and Quincy walked in, along with Tasha and Gibby.

"Alright! Let's see this grandkid!" Gibby said.

"Dad, not so loud, you'll scare her," Quincy said.

"Wow, look at her!" Gibby said, sitting down next to Freddie on the couch.

"I know, right," Freddie nodded. "She's really something, isn't she?"

"And she's ours," Gibby grinned, putting an arm around Freddie.

"Um…let's-let's not say that ever again," Freddie frowned, shrugging Gibby's hand off him. "Hey, you and Tasha want to hold her?"

"Yeah we do!" Tasha grinned.

"Yeah, come on little Savannah," Gibby said, taking the baby from Freddie. "Come over and meet your _favorite _grandparents."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Sam said. "What makes you think _you guys _are her favorite grandparents?"

"Please," Gibby scoffed.

"Um, you can 'please' all you want," Freddie said. "There is _no way_ you are the favorite grandparents. That title would belong to _us_."

"Shoosh yeah, baby," Sam said, high-fiving her husband.

"Oh my God," Carly said, shaking her head.

"Well _we_ happened to bring her an _awesome _present," Gibby said triumphantly. "Show them, Tasha!"

"Here you go, Savannah!" Tasha smiled, pulling a bright pink teddy bear out of her bag. "Isn't it pretty? Just like you, sweetheart!"

"Aw, isn't that cute," Sam said. "Too bad it's gonna look like nothing next to _our _present. Fredward! Bring it out!"

"On it," Freddie said, hurrying over to the closet underneath the stairs, where he lugged out a _huge _stuffed purple puppy that was half his size.

"Whoa, that's a big puppy," Ashton said.

"Um, guys, this-this is getting out of hand," Quincy said. "Savannah doesn't have any favorite-"

"What are you doing?" Emma hissed, covering his mouth quickly. "You realize how much stuff we can probably get out of the four of them during this little feud."

"Smart," Clarissa grinned.

"You know," Carly said to her daughter. "You won't even have to _have _any crazy fights like this for me to spoil any grandkid that I-"

"Mom! Enough!"

"Well," Gibby said, glaring at the giant puppy. "When-When you get older, Savannah, grandpa Gibby will be able to hook you up with as much liquid soap as you want from my connections…think about it. Any scent, any color…all yours!"

"What kid wants liquid soap?" Sam snapped.

"Yeah," Freddie agreed. "Savannah, we both know that when you're older, what you're really gonna want is technology. And since your grandpa _Freddie_ works for the Pear Company, he can get you the latest Pearphones, Pearpads, Pearbooks and other Pear accessories. And since your grandma _Sam _works for a T.V. company, she can get you to meet all sorts of celebrities."

"Yeah, beat that!" Sam said to Gibby and Tasha.

"Well…grandma Tasha works for a modeling agency!" Gibby said. "So she can make you a famous model!"

"Um, dad, I don't think we really want our daughter to be a model," Quincy frowned.

"Well you don't have a say in this!" Gibby snapped.

"Okay!" Carly said loudly. "You guys don't need to fight over who Savannah's favorite grandparents are. First of all, she's three weeks old; she probably doesn't even know who you guys are! All she knows right now is that there are four crazy people yelling around her! And second, even when she does get a little older, she's still not going to have any favorites. She's going to love all four of you guys _equally_. Now Jason and Tyler and Kirby and Huey will be here in a few hours to see their niece, and you guys can enjoy having your whole families together to celebrate the beautiful new addition that Emma and Quincy have brought to you. You don't want to be worrying about who can out-grandparent each other during that, do you?"

The four were silent for a moment.

"What time are Tyler and Jason getting in?" Freddie asked Sam.

"Four," Sam replied. "Which means…"

"We have enough time to run to Baby Empire and buy out the toy section!" Freddie said.

"Not if we get there first!" Gibby said, jumping to his feet, handing Savannah to Quincy.

"Did you not hear a word I just said?" Carly exclaimed.

"You got the credit cards?" Sam asked, grabbing her purse.

"Yup, let's move!" Freddie said.

"I think I kind of like this," Emma smiled. "It's pretty entertaining."

"Yes, why would you want a peaceful family dynamic," Quincy said, rolling his eyes.

"You knew what you were marrying in to, Quince," Ashton laughed.

"Yeah, we really couldn't expect anything less," Carly sighed, shaking her head. She turned back to Clarissa. "Seriously, can I at least set you up with my dentist's son? He's cute and-"

"Mom!"


	324. Chapter 324

_Comparative_

"Hey, check out what this one guy posted on our message board on iCarly," Freddie said as him, Sam and Carly as in the studio. "Hey Carly and Sam, I love your videos so much, especially your random debates. Yesterday, I completely forgot that I was supposed to have topic prepared for my social studies class for a mock debate that would count for half my final grade. So when I was called up, instead of admitting defeat, I began debating about whether garbage or medicine is more useful. My teacher was so impressed that I got an A."

"Wow, that's hilarious," Carly laughed, looking up from the magazine she was reading.

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "You know, we should do another random debate sometime."

"Go for it," Carly shrugged. "I never do them. It's always you and Freddie, and sometimes Gibby or Spencer that do them."

"Eh, I'll pass then," Sam said, looking over at Freddie.

Freddie rolled his eyes as he sat down on the third beanbag chair.

"Hey, you wanna hear something _really _hilarious?" Carly grinned.

"Um, always," Sam nodded.

Carly cleared her throat and began to read from her magazine. "A comparative research study has recently led experts to conclude that there is a definite linkage between the hair color of a female and her kissing abilities."

"What?" Sam laughed. "I think it's time you stop buying those magazine, Carls. That's even more crazy than that recipe for those homemade face masks you tried from last issue."

"They made our skin a little softer," Carly defended. "But this article's absolutely ridiculous. I mean, are you telling me that blondes, brunettes, and red heads all really have different kissing abilities just because of their hair colors?"

"Doesn't sound like a very sound research study," Freddie said. "There are a ton of extraneous variables at play, like-"

"You're extraneous," Sam snapped.

"You don't even know what that means," Freddie retorted.

"I don't care, you still are extronious or whatever it was," Sam shrugged.

"You know, I'm sure this is all just a load of garbage," Carly said thoughtfully. "But…you think that maybe it's just a little true?"

"What do you mean?" Sam frowned.

"Well, it _could _be possible," Carly said. "Even if it just plays a tiny factor in kissing ability."

"Well then go ask a guy who's kissed two chicks with different hair colors and ask him if you must," Sam said, somewhat amused.

"We don't have to look very far," Carly smirked, looking over at Freddie.

"Um…what-what are you talking about?" Freddie asked hesitantly.

"Well, you've kissed me, a brunette," Carly said. "And Sam, a blonde, so tell us; who's the better kisser?"

"Oh, um, I-I have a pot pie in the oven at home and-" Freddie began.

"Don't waste your breath, Carls," Sam said as Freddie was about to run out of the studio. "I already asked him who he thought was a better kisser. When we were doing that You're In Luck game on iCarly. He wouldn't answer me."

"Oh come on, Freddie, don't be a baby," Carly said. "Just answer the question."

"No!" Freddie moaned.

"Why?"

"Because, like I told Sam," Freddie said. "If I say Sam, your feelings will be hurt, and if I say you, Sam will kick me in bad places."

"What if we swear that we won't get mad or sad or…kicky, in any way?" Carly said. She turned to Sam. "If Freddie answers, will you agree to that?"

"Can't you just drop this?" Sam groaned. "The article's obviously not true, so why can't you just-"

"Agree or I'm canceling that fried chicken order!" Carly hissed.

"Okay, okay, fine!" Sam conceded. "I swear I won't hurt you, Fredwad."

"Well…I still don't want to have to say which one of you is the better kisser," Freddie sighed. "It will be awkward and-"

"Ah, but you admit that one of us _does _kiss better," Carly said.

"Well I guess, but-"

"So just say me or Sam," Carly said. "It's for science! I thought you loved science!"

"I do! But science was never supposed to turn against me like this!"

"Freddie…please, for me and Sam?" Carly pouted.

"I-I-I don't remember!" Freddie said, happy to have finally found a usable excuse to get out of answering the question. "Yeah, um, it-it was over a year ago for both of you."

"Fine," Carly shrugged. "Just kiss us again and-"

"Whoa, hey! I didn't sign up for that!" Sam exclaimed.

"Don't you want to know if one of us is a better kisser?"

"Not really, if I'm gonna have to go through _that _to find out!"

"Freddie," Carly said firmly. "Will you stop being such a baby and just answer the question?"

"Just do it before she goes berserk, Fredwad," Sam sighed.

"Um-Um, I-" Freddie stuttered as the girls began advancing on him.

"Hey! You guys!" Spencer said, bursting into the studio. "I just found my old coupon book that I bought from this boy scout at the water park last month and all the coupons in there are about to expire. Who wants to come with me and have a fun day of savings?"

"Me!" Freddie said at once. He threw his arms around the man. "Thank you. Thank you _so _much."

"Well gee, I didn't know anyone could be this excited about getting thirty percent off a haircut and shampoo," Spencer said, patting Freddie's back awkwardly.

"Wait!" Carly said. "He has to answer-"

"Come on, Spencer!" Freddie said, grabbing Spencer's arm and pulling him out of the studio. "Let's get to those savings!"

"Man, what was going on in _there_?" Spencer asked as the two headed downstairs.

"Any guys worst nightmare," Freddie said. "They were trying to get me to tell them who the better kisser was, you know, since I've kissed both of them."

"Oh jeez, that's the worst thing you can wish on a dude," Spencer shuddered.

"Yeah, I know," Freddie nodded. "So thanks for saving me."

"No problem," Spencer said. "I've had my fair share of those troublesome encounters."

"Really?"

"Yeah, a couple of years ago, those two ex-girlfriends that I backed over with my truck met up and tried to plot my death," Spencer said. "And if I hadn't looked real carefully in my yogurt, I don't think we'd be having this conversation right now."

"Yeah…that's the same thing," Freddie nodded, giving Spencer a strange look.

"So where do you wanna head first?" Spencer asked, grabbing his car keys. "The bakery, for five dollars off a fifty dollar bread purchase? Or Tire Tiki, for a free tire rotation and Hawaiian lea?"

"Um…I could for some bread," Freddie chuckled.

"Than off to the bakery it is!" Spencer said loudly. "Come along, young Fredwad!"

As Freddie headed out of the apartment after Spencer, he thought back to that study Carly had told them about. The more he thought about it, the more ridiculous it became, hair color determining kissing ability…who would believe such nonsense?

Although…maybe there was a slight chance…after all, though he would never tell Carly or Sam, the two did have _very _different kissing abilities, at least to him. One girl had left his lips feeling empty and incomplete, while the other…the other had made them hungry for her lips every time he would lay eyes on them, even now, when they were no longer together.

"What kind of bread should we get?" Spencer asked. "Pumpernickel? Italian? French? Maybe some baguettes or rolls? Or we can get some of each! How exciting!"

Freddie rolled his eyes at Spencer's fascination with the bread as he returned to his own thoughts.

Yes, Carly and Sam had different kissing abilities, there was no denying that, but he still couldn't bring himself to believe it had anything to do with their _hair color_. That was just insane.

But…in the rare, unlikely even that that was somehow true, he supposed he would have to consider himself a blonde lover.


	325. Chapter 325

_Minus_

"What do you think about this one?" Freddie asked, showing Sam the tenth wallpaper sample.

"Ugly," Sam said, barely even looking at the sample.

"Well what about this one?"

"Hideous."

"Okay, to say that I _think _you have to actually look at it first," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"We've been at this for an hour!" Sam groaned.

"Its been twenty minutes!"

"Well it _feels _like and hour," Sam mumbled. "Why do we even need to look at wallpaper samples anyway?"

"Because, don't you want our first place together to look nice?" Freddie asked.

"It _does_ look nice, baby!" Sam said. "The walls are painted, so why do we need to cover it up with stupid wallpaper?"

"Because it adds a nice touch," Freddie said. "Now, what about this one? You like this one?"

"Eh, I guess it's fine," Sam sighed. "Minus the stupid stripe thing it has going on there."

"The stripes are the whole thing, Sam," Freddie said.

"Oh…well then it's gross too."

"Well then what kind of wallpaper do _you _want?" Freddie asked her.

"I don't know!" Sam exclaimed. "No one cares this much about wallpaper, Fredward."

"I do," Freddie said stubbornly. "And if you don't want to have any input in the official wallpaper of our home, that's fine. But I'm not leaving this spot until I find it."

Sam smirked. "Really?"

"Really," Freddie said firmly.

Sam moved closer to him. "So absolutely _nothing's _gonna get you to put down those wallpaper samples for even a _few_ minutes?"

"That's right," Freddie nodded.

"Nothing?" Sam repeated, moving so close to him that she was breathing in his ear. She wrapped her arms around his shoulder.

"What are you doing?" Freddie asked slowly.

"What are you talking about?" Sam asked innocently, gently placing a few kisses on his neck.

"Sam…I-I know what you're up to," Freddie said weakly. "It's not gonna work."

"It's _not_?"

"N-No," Freddie said, his heartbeat increasing as Sam moved herself onto his lap, still kissing at his neck.

"You know," Sam said, whispering in his ear. "Wallpaper's one way to really break in our new place…but maybe there's other ways too…"

"Other ways?" Freddie squeaked.

"But," Sam said, pulling away from him. "I guess if you want to stick to wallpaper, then I'll just-"

"Forget the wallpaper," Freddie said, quickly tossing the book of samples aside.

"But I thought nothing was going to make you put those down," Sam laughed.

"Yeah, well," Freddie said, pushing her down on the sofa, making her emit a girly, un-Samish squeal. "I'm a hypocrite, what can I say?"

He leaned down and began kissing her deeply.

As the couple's kisses deepened, they began to go further, neither one of them paying any attention to anything besides the other.

"Hey, you guys!" Carly said, letting herself into the house. "Freddie texted me that you guys were having trouble picking out wallpaper, so I picked up some samples from-Oh my God!"

"Carly?" Sam yelled as her and Freddie quickly pulled apart.

"What are you _doing _here?" Freddie exclaimed as him and Sam quickly…made themselves presentable.

"I'm sorry!" Carly said, her eyes tightly shut. "I didn't know you guys were…busy."

"Well we have this crazy thing called a _doorbell _outside our door," Freddie said, yanking his shirt back on.

"Well after the _thousands _of times you guys have just burst into my place, I figured we had an open door policy between us!" Carly retorted.

"Yeah, but it's not like you have guys over that often," Sam mumbled.

"Okay…that was a low blow," Carly said.

"Sorry," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "It's just-What do you need Carls? Not that we're not, er, _thrilled _to see you."

"I was just gonna drop off these wallpaper samples for Freddie," Carly said, handing Freddie a book.

"Oh…well thanks," Freddie said, his face still red.

"Way to go nub, your stupid wallpaper really knows how to kill the mood," Sam said, thumping the back of his head.

"Look, I'm sorry I just barged in, Freddie's right; I should rung the doorbell," Carly said.

"It's fine," Sam sighed. "I mean, when have any of us _ever _knocked…I guess this was bound to happen to one of us eventually."

"I guess," Carly chuckled. "But um…maybe we really should at least start _locking _our doors before we engage in any…activities."

"Sounds like a plan," Freddie said. "Anyway, thanks for stopping by, Carls! We'll catch up later, bye!"

"Yeah, yeah," Carly said, rolling her eyes as she headed towards the door. "Have fun 'picking our wallpaper'."

"Now then," Freddie said, locking the door behind Carly, wrapping his arms around Sam. "Where were we?"


	326. Chapter 326

_Organization_

"I can't believe this place doesn't have a single snack machine!" Sam fumed as her and Freddie walked into the gym.

"Well Sam, generally people don't like to eat high calorie snacks when they work out," Freddie chuckled. "People usually work out in the first place _because _they fill guilty about eating so many of those."

"Good thing I brought my own supplies, just in case this happened," Sam said, pulling a Fat Cake out of her pocket. "Okay, Benson. What do you do at this place? Treadmill? Elliptical? That weird looking machine that looks painful?"

"Well, I have a system," Freddie said. "And it's perfectly structured to give me just the right amount of cardio, strength, and endurance."

"Who structures their workout?" Sam scoffed, rolling her eyes. "I thought most people just come here and did whatever makes them sweat the least. But then again, you _are _a little obsessive about these things. I mean, you're the only person on earth who has an organizational chart for your underwear drawer."

"That's my mom's idea, and I thought you promised to never speak of it!" Freddie hissed.

"Alright, alright, I'm not speaking of it," Sam laughed. "So seriously, what do you do first?"

"Well first, I like to lift some weights," Freddie said, heading over to an empty bench. "Then I'll do the elliptical, do a few pull-up reps on those bars over there, and then cool down with a nice jog on the treadmill."

"Sounds like…effort," Sam cringed. "What am I supposed to do while you do that?"

"You can work out too," Freddie shrugged.

Sam nearly chocked on her Fat Cake. "Yeah…like _I _work out. I'm naturally strong, Fredscab."

"I know," Freddie smiled. "But if you didn't want to work out, then why'd you ask to come to the gym with me?"

"Because my cable was out," Sam said. "Besides, I want to see how you suddenly got those muscles of yours. I mean it's like one day last year you just sprouted those things."

"Well after one is beat constantly in arm wrestling, one feels the need to do something about it," Freddie smirked as he pulled off his sweatshirt, leaving him in only a loose-fitting tank top.

"I can still beat you in arm wrestling though," Sam pointed out, enjoying the new sight of her boyfriend's arms.

"Yes, but it takes you longer now," Freddie said, definitely noticing Sam's lingering eyes, causing him to grin. "My goal is to make it seven seconds."  
"In your dreams," Sam said.

"So," Freddie said, sitting down on the weight bench. "If you're not going to work out, what do you plan on doing here while you wait for me?"

"I dunno," Sam shrugged, sitting down on the end of the bench as Freddie began to lift one of the weights. "I guess I'll just sit and watch you."

"Like what you see?" Freddie said cockily.

"What? A sweaty little nub?" Sam asked, though her face was quite flushed.

Freddie rolled his eyes and continued to lift his weights.

Sam watched, trying not to look _too much _as if she were about to drool. She had to hand it to the dork; all this time at the gym had really paid off for him. And it seemed like she wasn't the only one who thought so, judging by the small group of girls who had gathered over by one of the stationary bikes, looking at her boyfriend, giggling. But once firm glare from Sam sent them back to their own workouts.

"How much are you lifting now?" Sam asked Freddie.

"210," Freddie replied, setting the weight down.

"Impressive," Sam grinned.

"I'm trying to get up to 250," Freddie told her.

"You will, baby," Sam said encouragingly.

"Thanks," Freddie smiled, taking a swig from his water bottle. "Hey, you wanna give it a try?"

"Lifting weights?"

"Sure," Freddie nodded. "You're strong, come on. Let's see if you can handle it."

"Alright," Sam agreed, sitting down where Freddie was. She began to lift the weight, but before she actually lifted it, she looked over at Freddie. She didn't know why, maybe because he was standing there with his muscles all sweaty and glistening, making her react in such a…girlish manner, but she suddenly felt the urge to do something...nice for her boyfriend. After all, the nub was always doing things to make _her_ happy, wasn't he?

And so, even though Sam knew she could have easily lifted the weight in front of her (she _did _have a reputation of flipping truck drivers), she pulled on a strained face and pretended to be trying with all her might to lift it, while really not trying at all.

"Holy chiz," she said, panting. "What the heck is that thing made of? Stone?"

"You can't lift it?" Freddie asked, looking somewhat proud that her could apparently bench more than his freakishly strong girlfriend.

"No!" Sam said, feigning a voice of annoyance. "I guess…I guess you can lift more than me."

"Then why can I never beat you in arm wrestling?" Freddie said, confused.

"Well your _arm_ doesn't weigh 210, now does it?" Sam pointed out. "I can handle _that _just fine."

Freddie studied her for a moment, and Sam got the feeling that he had seen through her little charade, but he didn't say anything. He just smiled and bent down and kissed her.

"So how much longer?" Sam asked, moving out of the way so Freddie could sit back down on the weight bench. "That Fat Cake wasn't enough; I'm still starving."

"Well they sell protein bars down at the front desk," Freddie suggested.

"Those things taste like chalk," Sam said. "Let's just hit the smoothie when you're done."

"Sounds good," Freddie nodded, getting back to lifting.

Sam watched him for a moment, and then slowly took out her Pearphone.

"What are you doing?" Freddie asked, looking over at her.

"Just, um, checking my email," Sam said, snapping a few quick pictures. "Get back to your weight thing."


	327. Chapter 327

**AN-Hey, so tried to keep the rating down on this one as much as I could. And also, the request for this one was to do it with Tyler and Clarissa, but I really couldn't come up a way of doing those two that didn't feel weird, and then I realized I never really gave Jason much of a romantic spotlight, so I figured I would do this one with him. I hope you still like it!**

…**..**

_Protocol_

"I just don't get it," Freddie mumbled as he sat at the kitchen table with his laptop and checkbook in front of him. "_Where _is all our money going? We should have more in savings than this? Have you bought anything big lately, Sam?"

"No, because _somebody _still refuses to go for my trampoline idea," Sam said, looking up from the dinner she was preparing.

"Well then what the heck is going on here?" Freddie said, frustrated.

"Hi daddy!" the couple's twelve-year old twins, Emma and Ashton, said, coming into the kitchen and sitting down on either side of their father.

"Hey girls," Freddie smiled.

"Daddy?" Ashton asked. "Do you think I could have forty dollars? I have to give this oral presentation at school next week, and I thought I'd be more comfortable doing it if I had a cute new outfit to wear."

"And could I have forty bucks too?" Emma asked sweetly. "My soccer balls getting worn out, and I saw this awesome one at the sporting goods store the other day that's all different colors."

"Oh, um, sure girls," Freddie nodded, pulling out his wallet and handing each of his daughters a few bills.

"You're the best, daddy!" Ashton grinned, giving him a kiss on his cheek before running out of the kitchen.

"Yeah, thanks dad!" Emma said, throwing her arms around him before running off after her sister.

"So you know how you were wondering where all our money's going?" Sam smirked.

"Yeah I get I now," Freddie sighed.

"Mom?" sixteen-year old Jason said, joining his parents in the kitchen. "What's for dinner?"  
"Chicken Parmesan," Sam replied, sliding the dish into the oven.

"Smells good," Jason said. "But um, did-did you happen to make an extra serving?

"Why?"  
"Because I just invited Eileen over for dinner," Jason said sheepishly. "I-I sort of hoped that would be okay."

"That's fine, but you better tell Emma she doesn't get seconds tonight," Sam said. "And next time let me _know _when you invite your girlfriend over for dinner, will you?"

"Yup," Jason nodded. "Thanks, mom."

"So," Freddie said as his son left. "You officially approve of his girlfriend then?"

"She's a sweet girl, I guess," Sam shrugged. "Plus her family owns that huge pie shop. I mean, come on, who _wouldn't _want their son to be dating someone with _those _connections? And when did I ever say I didn't approve of her?"

"I don't know, I just know how…protective you can be sometimes," Freddie said.

"Protective?" Sam repeated, glaring at him.

"I'm just glad you seem to like Eileen," Freddie said quickly.

"Mom? Dad?" eight-year old Tyler said, coming into the kitchen.

"Okay," Sam sighed. "What do _you _want?"

"You inviting any girls over? You want to milk money out of us?" Freddie asked.

"I just wanted to ask if I could help cook," Tyler frowned.

Sam chuckled. "Finally, a kid who doesn't want something out of us. Come here, Ty, help me make some garlic bread."

….

"Wow, Mrs. Benson, that smells amazing," Jason's girlfriend, Eileen, said brightly as Jason led her into the kitchen.

"Oh, thanks," Sam said.

"And I hope you don't mind, but I brought over some pies from my parents bakery," she continued, handing Sam a bag with three pies in them. "I thought that we could have them for desert…unless you have something else in mind, of course. I hope I got everyone's favorite flavors right, though. I think it was you and Ashton who liked the Boston cream pie, Mr. Benson and Tyler, the Key Lime, and Emma and Jason the chocolate pudding pie."

"Holy chiz you're good," Sam grinned, looking down at the pies.

"Sam? Dinner almost ready?" Freddie asked, coming into the room. "Oh, hey there, Eileen."

"Hi, Mr. Benson," Eileen smiled. "Whoa? Is that a _Galaxy Wars _watch?"

"Yeah, it is," Freddie nodded.

"I love _Galaxy Wars_," Eileen said.

"No way, really?" Freddie said.

"She's a huge fan," Jason said proudly. "Isn't she just the best?

"Jason, go get the twins and Tyler and tell them dinner's on the table," Sam told her son.

"Emma! Ashton! Tyler! Get in here!" Jason yelled.

"Or do _that_," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

….

"This pie is like eating heaven with a fork," Emma said as she dug into her third slice of pie.

"I know," Sam nodded, scooping some whipped cream off her plate. "You're parents are _real _good pie chefs, Eileen."

"Well they love making pies for people, and since they absolutely _adore _Jason, they were thrilled to make them for you," Eileen smiled.

"Make sure you thank them for us," Freddie said.

"Will do," Eileen nodded. "And again, Mrs. Benson, dinner was just _phenomenal._"

"Yeah well, I like food," Sam said.

"So mom, dad?" Jason as Freddie began picking up the dirty dishes from the table, which Eileen jumped to help him with. "Eileen and I were gonna go hang out for awhile tonight, that's cool right?"

"Um, yeah, just be back by one," Sam nodded.

"I'd give you money, but your sisters wiped me out," Freddie said.

"It's cool, I have cash," Jason said, taking his girlfriend's hand. "Don't wait up."

"Bye guys, I really enjoyed getting a chance to talk with you all over dinner," Eileen said. "Just let me know if you want anymore pies."

"Oh don't worry, we'll be chatting very soon," Sam said. "Have fun, you two."

"Well," Freddie said as the teens left the house. "I think it's safe to say that she's our favorite girl Jason's dated."  
"What? Out of like the three girlfriends he's had?" Ashton snickered.

"She's nice," Tyler said as Sam wiped off the whipped cream that had smeared all over his face with a wet napkin.

"Yeah, and cool," Emma agreed.

"Jason should marry that chick," Ashton nodded.

"No one's getting married yet," Sam said firmly. "He's sixteen."

"Yeah, your mom might like Eileen, but that doesn't mean she's ready to give Jason up to her just yet," Freddie chuckled, earning him a thump oh the head from his wife.

…..

Freddie yawned as he got up the next morning, looking over at Sam, who was still fast asleep. Knowing that soon the kids would be up, he figured he might as well go start breakfast. He slid on his slippers and headed out of his bedroom, but just as he was about to head down the stairs to the kitchen, he nearly bumped into Jason, who was climbing up.

"Oh, sorry dad," Jason said, looking startled.

"Jason?" Freddie frowned, noticing his son was wearing the clothes he had been wearing the day before. "Are you-Are you just getting home _now_? At seven in the morning?"

"No, I was pretty exhausted when I got home last night," Jason said quickly. "So I just crashed on the couch."

"Oh…okay," Freddie nodded. "Breakfast will be ready in a little bit."

"Thanks, but I think I'm gonna go try and get a few more hours sleep in my bed," he told his father.

"Alright, I'll save you a plate then," Freddie nodded. He continued downstairs and pulled out a carton of eggs from the fridge.

"Whatcha making?" Sam suddenly asked, wrapping her arms around him from behind.

"Sam?" Freddie said, surprised, as he gave her a quick kiss. "What are you doing up so early? I didn't wake you when I got up, did I?"

"Yeah, you did," Sam said, showing a small smile. "But I figured you were making food down here, so I decided to come down and make sure I got some. Just don't be surprised when you find me back in bed for a nap in a few hours."

"You would be taking a nap even if you slept in until noon," Freddie chuckled.

"Yeah, probably," Sam agreed. "Hey, you busy today?"

"No, why?"

"I was thinking we could take the kids to the boardwalk in the afternoon," Sam said. "You know, since it's getting warmer and the rain's finally supposed to stop."

"That sounds fun," Freddie nodded, beginning to crack a few eggs.

"We can eat at that crab shack, and Ashton can check out that new little jewelry boutique they got there," Sam said. "And Jason can ask Eileen if she wants to come too."

"What, the girl brings you some pies and suddenly she's your new best friend," Freddie asked, amused.

"Oh can it, Fredham," Sam said. "I'm not allowed to like my son's girlfriend without being put on trial?"

"No, I'm sorry," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Like I said before, I'm glad you like her, and I think it's nice of you to have Jason include her like this."

"Thank you," Sam said, satisfied. "Now hurry up with my eggs, will you? So I can get back to bed.

…..

"Unbelievable," Carly said, shaking her head as her, Sam and Freddie walked into a drugstore a few weeks later. "A four hundred dollar parking ticket?"

"Well you _were _parked in front of a fire hydrant," Freddie told her.

"For the millionth time, it wasn't a real fire hydrant!" Carly snapped. "It was a statue of one! It was just part of the decoration scheme for that dog park I parked by! The thing was purple for crying out loud!"

"Well then why didn't you tell the stupid cop who gave you the ticket to get his eyes checked?" Sam asked.

"Because _some _of us don't like verbally harassing law enforcement," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Well then have fun with your four hundred dollar fine," Sam shrugged.

"Guys come on, let's just get Gibby his cold medicine so we can pick him up and head to the museum to see Spencer's new sculpture," Freddie said.

"Okay," Carly conceded. "But I'm still calling city hall about my ticket."

"Hey, Freddie," Sam said, looking over across the store. "Isn't that Eileen over there?"

"Jason's girlfriend?" Carly asked.

"Yeah…hey that is her," Freddie nodded as Eileen headed to the cash register. "Wanna go say hi?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "I want to ask her-um, what-what's that in her hand?"

"Oh my God," Carly said, her eyes widening. "That's not a…"

"Not a what?" Freddie frowned. "What's she buying?"

"Get over here!" Sam hissed, quickly pulling her husband behind a shelf so that Eileen wouldn't see them. She craned her neck so that she could try and get a better look at what her son's girlfriend was buying. "Oh man, it is!"

"_What _are you guys talking about?" Freddie demanded. "She's just buying something in a little white box."

"You don't know what that is?" Carly asked.

"No," Freddie shrugged.

"It's a pregnancy test!" Sam told him.

"Huh?" Freddie frowned. "Are you sure?"

"Positive," Sam nodded.

"Why would she be buying one of those?" Freddie asked slowly.

"Gee, I don't know, maybe to take her temperature?" Sam snapped. "Holy chiz, what are we gonna do?"

"Wait," Freddie said. "You can't be thinking…Jason wouldn't…they're not…oh my God. Oh my _God_, no!"

"Okay guys," Carly said. "I know this seems bad-"

"Bad?" Sam repeated. "_Bad _is when you find out your kid took ten bucks from your purse. _Bad _is when they take your car without asking. _This_, this is-"

"A disaster? A mess? Something that's completely going to change his life?" Freddie offered.

"Exactly," Sam nodded.

"Look," Carly said, trying to calm her two best friends down. "Maybe-Maybe it's not what it looks like."

"How could it not be what it looks like?" Sam demanded. "A chick buying a pregnancy test pretty much only means one thing."

"But-Yeah, okay, I guess that's true," Carly agreed. "But…don't-don't jump to the worst conclusion. Eileen might just be being…paranoid. She can go home, take the test, and have it come up negative."

"Please, sixteen-year old girls don't buy pregnancy tests if they're not already somewhat sure what the result's gonna be," Sam said. "And even if her test _does _wind up negative, that's still not the point!"

"Then what _is _the point?" Freddie asked.  
"That our son, our _baby_, is doing the…_things _necessary for her to be buying that test in the first place!" Sam exclaimed.

"Oh man, you're right…I haven't even thought about that," Freddie moaned. "_God _I wish we were back to dealing with problems like him taking my _Galaxy Wars _computer games and trying to rollerblade in the house."

"What are we gonna do?" Sam asked for the second time. "Huh Freddie? What?"

"I-I don't know," Freddie sighed. "There isn't exactly a protocol for this sort of thing…"

"Well first thing _I'm _doing is going home and beating some sense into that kid!" Sam fumed. "He better realize what this could mean for him!"

"His whole life would be over…" Freddie said softly. "College would pretty much be out the window…he's been dreaming of going to Cal Tech for years, and he's already been starting to look at their application…"

"Well, um, guys," Carly said weakly. "Is there…Is there any chance that, you know, Eileen's possible 'condition' might not have been _caused _by Jason?"

"What are you saying?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah…that's it! Carly you're a genius!" Sam said, throwing her arms around Carly. "Maybe Eileen was _cheating _on Jason with some other dude who she did…_that _with, and this whole thing isn't Jason's fault at all!"

"Sam," Freddie sighed. "Do you really think sweet, thoughtful little Eileen would be cheating on Jason?"

"Yes," Sam said firmly. "Because if she is, then I can go back to knowing that Jason isn't out there doing…_that_. Which he _isn't_."

"We-We can't be sure that-" Freddie began.

"I'm sorry, do you _want _all this to be happening to Jason?" Sam frowned.

"No," Freddie said firmly. "But we also have to be realistic here, Sam! He's sixteen, kids have those…urges. I don't know if Jason's ever-"

"What do you mean you don't know?" Sam demanded. "You're his dad, that's your job to find that stuff out! Didn't you have that talk with him?"

"Five years ago!" Freddie pointed out. "And I know Jason and I are close and all, but I still don't know if he'd want to come and talk to me about that. He might've thought it would be uncomfortable and awkward, I don't know! But the point is-oh no."

"What?" Sam asked anxiously.

"Okay, don't-don't freak out about this," Freddie said. "But a few weeks ago I was coming downstairs to make breakfast, and Jason was just coming upstairs, still wearing the clothes he had on the day before. And when I asked him if he had just gotten home, he said that he had fallen asleep on the couch…and a few nights ago the same thing happened."

"Oh my God, he was probably coming back from _her _place," Sam mumbled, rubbing her temples. "This is not happening…this is _not _happening!"

"Baby, calm down," Freddie said shakily. "I-I'll find out if him and Eileen have been…you know. I'll talk to him tonight."

"Good," Sam said, shaking her head. "I can't believe this…Jason's only sixteen; he's still a kid! He's still my baby!"

"It's gonna work out, Sam," Carly said as Freddie put a comforting arm around her, while looking just as lost and confused as she was.

….

"Jason's been acting weird lately," Sam mumbled as she nervously paced back and forth in the living room. "Haven't you noticed? He seems…distracted. Do-Do you think Eileen told him she was buying that test?"

"She might have…" Freddie said. "Or maybe-"

Just then the front door opened and Jason walked in with his backpack.

"H-Hey," Freddie said.

"Hi," Jason mumbled.

Sam studied her son, trying not to jump up and wrap her arms around him and just pretend for a moment that he was six years old and thought the worst thing that could happen was losing his favorite dinosaur toy.

"You-You alright there?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah," Jason shrugged, and Sam instantly knew by his voice that he was not. "I'm just gonna go up to my room…do some homework."

"Go up there!" Sam hissed as Jason ran upstairs.

"Okay," Freddie nodded. He started up after his son, trying to figure out what the heck he would say to him. He reached Jason's door and knocked.

"Jason?" he said, poking his head into the room. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

"Um, sure, I guess," Jason said, looking up from his textbook. "I'm kind of busy though…"

"I'll try to be quick," Freddie said, sitting down at his desk. "Listen…you remember when you were eleven and we had that, er, _talk_?"

"Uh-huh," Jason nodded, frowning.

"Well, um, I-I'm sure all that stuff seemed a little over your head then, I mean, you were just a little kid then," Freddie said. "So, um, you know…now that that information's a bit more…applicable, I, er, just wanted to know if maybe you had any new questions? You have a girlfriend now, and you two have been dating for what, eight months?"

"Eleven," Jason corrected.  
"Okay, eleven," Freddie nodded. "And, well, I know that you obviously care very much for Eileen, and when one _cares _for someone like that, they-"

Just then Jason's Pearphone rang and he picked it up.

"Hello?" the teen answered. "Oh, right, I'll be there in fifteen minutes."

"Who was-" Freddie began.

"Look, dad, as much as I hate to run in the middle of what sounded like a very _awkward _conversation," Jason said, stuffing his book into his backpack and slinging it over his shoulder. "I got to run. I'm supposed to be somewhere at four."

"Where are you going?" Freddie asked.

"Just-Just the coffee place," Jason said quickly. "I should be home in time for dinner, but if not, I'll just grab a burger or something."

"Jason, wait!" Freddie called after his son. "We need to-" but the teen had already hurried out of the room.

Freddie dragged his feet back downstairs to Sam.

"Hey, what happened? Why'd Jason leave?" Sam asked.

"He said he was supposed to be at some coffee place," Freddie sighed.

"And did you find out if-"

"I tried!" Freddie exclaimed.

"_Tried_?" Sam said loudly. "Freddie, we need to figure out whether we're in real trouble here or not!"

"You think I don't know that?" Freddie snapped. "Look, I think we just need to sit Jason down when he gets home and tell him up front that we want to know what's going on with him and Eileen. It's not going to be the easiest conversation in the world, but we need to do it."

"Okay," Sam agreed. "Even though part of me really doesn't _want _to know the answer to that."

…

"Ashton! You ate the last of the chocolate ice cream!" Emma snapped.

"Well Tyler ate my mint ice cream," Ashton defended.

"It didn't have your name on it," Tyler said.

"Emma, there's a pint of that butter pecan ice cream you like in the back of the freezer," Sam said as she helped Freddie load the dishwasher. "Have that."

"Hey, Jason just pulled into the driveway," Freddie whispered to Sam.

"Um, okay you three, go take your ice cream up to your rooms," Sam said.

"Why?" Emma frowned.

"Because I said so," Sam said firmly. "Go, upstairs. Now."

Mumbling protests under their breath, the three younger Benson children climbed upstairs just as Jason walked into the house.

"Hey, sorry I missed dinner," Jason said, coming into the kitchen, grabbing a soda.

"Sit," Freddie said, trying to keep his voice calm.

"Why?" Jason asked.

"Just sit, Jason," Sam said, crossing her arms.

"Am I in some sort of trouble here?" Jason asked.

"I don't know," Freddie said. "Why don't you tell us?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Jason frowned. "I-" But just then his phone rang again.

"It's Eileen," Jason said, looking down at his screen. "Can I answer?"

"I-Fine okay," Sam conceded. "But you have one minute."

"Hey babe," Jason said, answering his phone, causing Sam to squeeze the dishtowel in her hand tightly.

"What? No way!" Jason said, continuing his conversation into his phone. "So she was right then. Wow…well tell her congratulations for me. I'll try to swing by later and tell her myself, but my parents are being kind of weird here, so I don't know if I'll be able to…Oh, that? Yeah, that's all taken care of. It had me freaked out there for a few days, though. Alright, well, I'm sure you're gonna go celebrate, so I'll talk to you later. Love you."

"No more phone calls, got it?" Freddie said as his son hung up. He held out his hand for the phone. "We're serious, we need to talk to you about something that needs your full attention right now."

"Um, okay," Jason said, handing over his phone. "Sorry…Eileen just wanted to tell me that her mom just found out she was pregnant."

"I don't care what that little-what?" Sam said, her eyes widening. "Eileen's _mom _is pregnant?"

"Yeah," Jason nodded. "She just found out. Eileen told me she's been suspecting it for a few weeks now, but she didn't want to get her hopes up. So today after school Eileen went out and picked her up a pregnancy test from the drug store and I guess it came out positive."

"Wait," Freddie said slowly. "So…Eileen picked up a pregnancy test for her mom?"  
"Yes…that's what I just said," Jason replied.

Sam and Freddie exchanged glances.

"Well…that takes care of that then," Sam mumbled. "After nearly giving me a heart attack."

"What are you guys talking about?" Jason asked confused.

"Nothing," Freddie said, trying to hold back a smile as relief flooded through his body. "Nothing at all."

"Wait, so um, Jason," Sam said. "Why-Why have you been acting sort of weird for the past few weeks? You know, you've been spending a lot of time in your room, and you've been a little…down."

"Oh, that's actually a funny story," Jason chuckled. "See, I checked my physics grade a little while ago and it was a-it was a _B_. So naturally I started freaking out, but I didn't want to worry you guys, so I tried to keep it a secret. I would spend all night studying down here after you went to bed and wind up crashing on the couch. And I even hired a private tutor who has been helping me study for our next test coming up. And today while I was being tutored my teacher emailed me and told me that he had made a mistake when he entered my last quiz grade, and that my average was really an A."

"So-So you were all bummed out over a _B_?" Sam exclaimed. She glared at Freddie. "Do you see what you did to him?"

"Is that what you guys wanted to talk to me about then?" Jason asked.

"Er, sure," Freddie nodded. "Let's go with that."  
"Well then is it alright if I go over and see Eileen?" Jason asked. "I want to pick her mom up a card or something."

"Y-Yeah, go ahead," Sam said.

"Thanks," Jason grinned.

"Well," Freddie said once his son left. "I feel stupid."  
"I kind of want to ground him for putting us through that…even though he had no idea what the heck was going on," Sam said.

"Man, whoever said the 'terrible twos' were the worst year clearly never raised a teenager," Freddie said.

"And we have three more to go," Sam said, giving him a weak smile.

"We're gonna be a mess by the time we're done with these kids," Freddie sighed.


	328. Chapter 328

_Enhancement_

"Okay, let's see…" Carly said, rummaging through her large supply of makeup. "I guess this powder foundation will do. And I can use this pencil for your eyes to make them look all scary and dark."

"Why are we doing another stupid vampire bit?" Sam asked as she sat on Carly's bed with her boyfriend, who was getting ready to undergo his makeover for his character.

"The last one we did was pretty popular," Freddie said.

"Yeah, and a lot of our viewers have been asking for more," Carly nodded, dumping the makeup she would be using on Freddie onto her bed.

"Yeah, and they're all stupid chicks who just want to swoon all over Freddie because they're so obsessed with vampires," Sam pointed out.

"Baby, don't worry, no matter how many girls 'swoon' over me, you know there's only one girl for me," Freddie smiled, giving her a quick kiss.

"Please, like I'm worried," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Sure, you might lure in some girl with your vampire get-up, but once they realize what a nub you are underneath all that, they'll hit the road."

"And if not, Sam with just hit them," Carly grinned.

"Well, yeah," Sam nodded.

"Okay," Carly said, picking up a makeup brush. "Sam, try and do his eyes while I do his powder."

"On it," Sam said, picking up a weird looking eyeliner pencil. "Er, Carls? What the heck is this?"

"Eyeliner," Carly replied.

"Uh-huh…then why does it look like something I would use to play darts with?"

"It's a new brand I'm trying," Carly said, taking it from her. "Here, just uncap it right here and then turn this…Oh, and make sure you give him a really heavy upper lining, and go a little lighter on his lower lid because we'll be using some black eye shadow to make his eyes look sunken."

"What does that mean?" Sam frowned.

"Just…Just do what you think looks good and then I'll help you in a minute," Carly said.

_Since when did being a vampire become so complicated_? Sam thought to herself as she tried to apply the eyeliner to Freddie. Makeup was never her forte, but as she grew up, she _did _get better with it. Still, though, the complex designs that Carly was explaining to her were _way _beyond her makeup abilities, and by the time she was done with Freddie, she thought it was safe to say that she did _not _have Carly's makeup talents.

"Well…um…that looks…nice," Carly said, looking at Sam's work.

"You can say it sucks, Carls," Sam smirked.

"Yeah, it kind of sucks," Carly admitted.

"Can I see?" Freddie asked.

Carly handed him a mirror.

"Oh," Freddie said, looking at his reflection. "Well, um, at least it…It's sort of…"

"Redo his eyes for him, will you?" Sam said to Carly, putting an arm around her boyfriend's shoulder.

"Okay," Carly nodded, beginning to wipe off the makeup around Freddie's eyes.

"Sorry I made you look hideous, baby," Sam grinned.

"It's okay," Freddie chuckled. "I mean come on, we both know you're not exactly a makeup girl."

"Um…" Sam frowned. "What do you mean?"

"You know," Freddie shrugged. "It's not really your thing. You're more of a girl who'd rather spend an extra five minutes making bacon in the morning than worrying about putting that stuff on, like Carly does."

"I _do _know how to put makeup on," Sam told him. "I'm wearing some right now…I just can't do that crazy costume makeup chiz."

"Done," Carly said proudly, handing Freddie the mirror again so he could see her fixes. "You like it?"

"Yeah, looks good, Carls," Freddie nodded.

"Alright," Carly said. "Sam, we need to go get into our costumes, and Freddie can go set up the green screen."

"Okay," Freddie nodded, getting up and heading to the studio.

"I think Spencer borrowed your mustache for some party with Socko's cousin," Carly said to Sam as Freddie left. "I'll go run and get it for you."  
"Thanks," Sam mumbled.

She looked down at the pile of makeup on the bed, more than half of which she couldn't even identify. She sighed, maybe she _should _learn a little more about the stuff…

…

"Okay," Sam said the next morning, dumping out the makeup she had 'borrowed' from Carly the previous night. "Let's see what I can do…"

She pulled up some makeup tutorials on her laptop and then began rifling through the makeup on her bed. "Man…does she really own _nine _different types of mascara? And what the heck is this thing? Lip-enhancing color? It looks just like the rest of her lipstick!"

She looked through the rest of the makeup and finally decided she's begin with foundation. She rarely bothered with that, but she figured it would be a good place to start. Once she had applied a layer to her face, she began on her eyes, watching the tutorial twice before she began. She usually wore eyeliner and mascara every day, but usually just enough so that it was barely noticeable. She never got fancy like Carly would on some days and add and extra curl to her eyelashes or add those little wings to the corner of her eyes.

"I think I'm supposed to use this pencil," Sam mumbled to herself, holding up a particularly sharp eyeliner pencil. She leaned closer to her mirror and carefully prepared to apply it, when suddenly there was a knock at her bedroom door.

"Sam?" she heard Freddie said on the other side.

"Ow!" Sam snapped, as the sudden presence of her boyfriend startled her into jabbing her cornea.

"What's wrong?" Freddie asked, opening the door. "You okay?"

"No! My eyeball's throbbing!" Sam exclaimed.

"Here, let me see," Freddie said, concerned, as her hurried over to her. He looked at her eye.

"I think it's fine, just a little red," Freddie told her. "Want me to get you some ice?"

"No," Sam sighed.

"Um, is all this makeup yours?" Freddie asked, looking at the small mountain of the stuff on her bed.

"Nah, it's Carly's," Sam mumbled.

"Well why are you using it?" Freddie frowned.

"I just thought I'd give it a try," Sam shrugged.

"Really?"

"Yes, really," she said somewhat defensively. "Why? Is it _so wrong _that I want to wear makeup?"

"Well…no, I guess not," Freddie said slowly. "It's just…you never wear all this. I didn't think you liked it."

"Yeah, I know you thought that," Sam said bitterly, turning back to the mirror to give the eyeliner another chance.

"Huh?" Freddie said, confused. "What do you mean?"

"Never mind," Sam mumbled. "Just…go wait downstairs, I'll be ready in a little bit."  
"No," Freddie said, turning her around so that she was facing him. "Sam…what's bothering you?"

Sam looked down at the floor. "I-I just wanted to show you that I can be into this sort of stuff. You kept saying yesterday that I wasn't the type of girl that you would think would know how to do any of this chiz, and-and I guess I just wanted you to see that I can look…_nice_, if I wanted to."

"Oh…Sam," Freddie said, pulling her closer to him. "Baby…when-when I said that you weren't the type of girl who was really into makeup, I-I didn't mean for a second that you don't look beautiful. You know I think you do, all the time, makeup or no makeup."

"Yeah, but you'd probably think I'd look better if I tried a little more," Sam said. "You know, like Carly does."

"Absolutely not," Freddie said firmly. "Sam, you may not be the type of girl who knows how to make people look like teenage vampires or spends an extra half-hour every morning putting all this chiz on, but that's because you don't have to. You-You're just so naturally stunning. You could roll right out of bed and go out and look ten times better than most girls who spent hours trying to look good. And if you were to pile on makeup like that…it would only take away from that. I'm _glad _you don't obsess with your makeup and wear five million different types of blush or whatever; if you did…you just wouldn't be you anymore."

Sam stared up at him, blushing. "I can't just _roll _out of bed," she said softly.

"Sam, you could literally dump bucket after bucket of mud over yourself, and it still wouldn't make you any less beautiful," Freddie told her. He leaned down and gently kissed her. "You're perfect; you don't need to do anything to yourself to be any better."

Sam kissed him back. "Thanks, Fredrag."

He wrapped his arms around her. "Anytime."

"Hey," Sam grinned. "We have about an hour until school, right?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "Why?"

"Well…it rained last night, and you know my backyard is all dirt," Sam said, raising an eyebrow. "And since you _claim _I would look good covered in mud…care for a little mud fight before school?"

Freddie laughed. "I can go for that."


	329. Chapter 329

_Pork_

_It's okay_, Freddie Benson told himself as he sat on the hard, plastic seat inside the prison visiting area. _It's just a prison…full of criminals…no big deal. It's perfectly safe here. Nothing's gonna happen to me, just don't-_

"There he is," a guard said suddenly, walking into the visiting area with a large man in a navy prison jumpsuit. "That's your visitor."

"That guy?" the prisoner moaned, spotting Freddie. "You took me away from my soap opera for _him_?"

"Twenty minutes," the guard said indifferently, leading the prisoner over to Freddie. "That's all you got, so no funny business, Carmine."

"Er…hello, sir," Freddie said as Sam's uncle sat down across from him, glaring at him so intently that Freddie was sure he was going to burst into flames any second.

"What do you want?" Carmine asked sharply. "Did you bring Sammy with you?"

"No…just me today," Freddie said, offering a weak smile.

Uncle Carmine did not look amused.

"Um," Freddie said, trying to ignore the awkward tension between the two of them. "I'm sure you're wondering what I'm doing here-"

"Yeah, which is why I asked you, _what do you want_?"

"I-I need to ask you something," Freddie squeaked as Carmine cracked his knuckles.

"Oh…you want to _ask _me something," Carmine sneered, leaning back in his chair. "You, the kid who got my pork rights revoked-"

"That-that was seven years ago…sir," Freddie pointed out nervously.

"And that's how long its been since I've had any pork," Carmine said, narrowing his eyes.

"Oh, well…I-I'm sure that's been very difficult," Freddie said. "But hey! I-I managed to smuggle this in for you!" He pulled a sandwich out of his jacket pocket. "A ham sandwich."

"Ham?" Carmine repeated, grabbing the sandwich. "Oh sweet ham come to daddy!" He took a large bite of the sandwich, but nearly gagged a second later.

"Are you okay?" Freddie asked, jumping up.

"Is this," Carmine said, his voice scarily soft. "_Low sodium _ham?"

"Er…it-it's possible," Freddie stuttered. "I-I did have it made at a health conscious deli, so-"

"You," Carmine said, his voice dripping with disgust. "Are an absolute disgrace to meat everywhere. I hope you don't feed my Sammy that imposter ham."

"No sir, never," Freddie said quickly. "And um…speaking of Sam…she-she's sort of what I wanted to talk to you about."

"Why?" Carmine demanded. "Is she okay? Because I don't care how many prison guards there are around us, if you hurt my little Sammy, I'll-"

"No, I-I would never hurt her," Freddie said. "I love her."

"And yet you feed her uncle garbage," Carmine said, shaking his head.

"Um, anyway," Freddie said, trying to rack his brain to see _how _he thought having a sandwich made for a relative of Sam's at a healthy deli seemed like a good idea. "I-I know you're very close to Sam. She really loves you a lot, and she looks up to you like a father. She talks about you a lot…just the other night she was telling me about how when she was really little you would take her out to this ice cream place when you could tell that she really wanted to just get away from home for a little bit. And she always tells me about all the time you built her a tree house in her backyard with wood you 'borrowed' from a builder working a few houses down from her."

"Ah yes, good times," Carmine nodded, smiling reminiscently. "Sammy was always the daughter I never had."

"That's sweet," Freddie smiled.

"You calling me a daffodil, Benson?" Carmine snapped.

"No! I'm not!" Freddie exclaimed. "I-I just…I want to ask for your permission to ask Sam to marry me!"

Uncle Carmine looked taken aback. "You want to marry her?"

"More than anything, yes," Freddie gulped. "She means the world to me, and the only thing that could make me happier than having her as my girlfriend would be having her as my wife. And like I said…I know you're the closest father figure she has."

Carmine was silent for a few moments as he stared hard at Freddie. Freddie was suddenly very thankful he had remembered to use the restroom before coming in here, because he was sure that this was more stress than his bladder would've been able to handle.

"You really love my Sammy?" Uncle Carmine finally asked.

"Yes," Freddie nodded. "I really do."

"And you realize," Carmine said. "That by marrying her, you are giving me your word that you will always be there for her? That you will support her, provide for her, protect her, and _treasure_ her?"

"I'm looking forward to doing all of that and more," Freddie said. "Nothing would make me happier."

Carmine sighed. "Did you know when Sammy comes to visit me…you're the first thing she tells me about?"

"No, I didn't."

"And her face just lights up when she talks about you," Carmine continued. "Never have I seen her as happy as she is when she's with you, or when she's talking about you."

"I'm happiest when I'm around her too," Freddie said.

Carmine pursed his lips. "Look around here, Benson…Do you see all these prisoners?"

"Um..." Freddie said, looking at a particularly large man with a tattoo of a skull on his oversized bicep. "Yes."

"Well, if you ever hurt my Sammy….you'll be wishing you were trapped in a room full of _them _once I get my hands on you," he said firmly. "Am I clear?"

"Crystal," Freddie said meekly.

"Good," Carmine nodded. "Then…you have my blessing."

"I do?"

"Yeah you do!" Carmine said, his menacing scowl suddenly turning into a wide smile as he stood up, holding a hand out to Freddie. "Welcome to the family!"

He pulled Freddie into a bone-crushing hug that Freddie was sure left at least three of his ribs broken.

"Thank you!" he managed to say, massaging his sides once the man let go.

"Alright, Carmine," one of the guards said, approaching the table. "Time's up. Back in the hole."

"Okay, okay, keep your skimpies on!" Carmine snapped. He looked over his shoulder as the guard led him out.

"Take care of her," he managed to say before he was escorted out.

"I will! Don't worry!" Freddie assured him. He turned and quickly left the visiting area.

"Okay, heart," he said once safely outside, breathing a sigh of relief. "You can resume beating now."


	330. Chapter 330

**AN-So I tried to kind of give this post iGoodbye oneshot a little bit of closure, instead of just having Sam and Freddie get back together, as I've done with some of the other post iGoodbye oneshots I've written so far, since I think it's fair to say, judging my Sam & Cat, that they didn't (though I still have my fingers crossed for some future Seddie on there!). I hope you enjoy!**

…**..**

_Container_

"So…" Gibby said awkwardly as him, Spencer and Freddie sat around Spencer's apartment, which all of the sudden felt quite empty. "Who's up for seeing some weasel tricks?"

"Weasel tricks?" Spencer frowned.

"Dude, not the time," Freddie said.

"Just trying to ease the tension," Gibby mumbled.

"I can't believe she really left," Freddie sighed. "She's really going to Italy."

"I know," Spencer said heavily. "But…it'll be good for her, to get to spend some time with our dad."

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "I just wish Italy wasn't on the other side of the globe."

"So _no _weasel tricks then?" Gibby said.

"Gibby!" Spencer and Freddie simultaneously exclaimed.

"Alright! Jeez!"

"Hey," Spencer said. "Where's Sam? I thought she was coming right back up after she rode down with Carly."

"Yeah…so did I," Freddie nodded. "That was almost an hour ago."

"Think she went home?" Spencer asked.

"She must've," Freddie nodded. "Wow…she must be taking this whole thing really hard."  
"Well yeah, her and Carly are practically sisters," Spencer pointed out. "Poor kid…I hope she's okay."

"Maybe…Maybe I should go check on her," Freddie said slowly, getting to his feet. "She probably needs someone to talk to right now."

"Good idea," Spencer said. "You need a ride over there?"

"No thanks," Freddie said. "I-I'll see you later."

"Yeah, don't be leaving me all by myself over here," Spencer said, giving him a small smile.

"Don't worry, I'll stop by still," Freddie chuckled as he headed out the door.

…..

When he arrived at Sam's house he noticed that the motorcycle that she had been helping Spencer fix up was parked on her driveway.

_Spencer must've given it to her_, Freddie thought. She must've been so excited…too bad her mood had been crushed like this.

He knocked at her door, but there was no answer.

"Sam?" he called. "Sam, it's me!" He jiggled the doorknob and found that the door was unlocked. He walked into the house, seeing that the downstairs area was empty, except for Sam's rabid cat, Frothy, who was laying in his litter box on the coffee table, glaring at Freddie.

Freddie quickly hurried upstairs, away from the feline, to Sam's room. He could see that the light was on, as it shined out from the crack between the door and the floor, and he could hear someone moving around inside.

"Sam?" he said, knocking on the door.

"Freddie?" The bedroom door flew open and Sam stared at him, surprised. "What are you doing here?"

"You-You left your front door open," Freddie told her. "You really shouldn't do that, you know."

"Yeah…well everybody around here knows better than to mess with me, so I think I'm fine," Sam said, walking back into her room.

It was a cluttered mess, just as Freddie remembered from the times he had been in it. Clothes spilled all over the floor, half-finished snack bags and take-out containers littered her dresser and a box of what looked like fireworks poked out from underneath her bed.

"We all thought you were gonna come back up after you rode down with Carly," Freddie said as Sam began to rifle through her drawers.

"Well I didn't," Sam said simply.  
"Yes…clearly," Freddie said. "Anyway, how you holding up?"

"Just peachy."

"You don't seem too peachy," Freddie said, sitting down on her bed next to her backpack.

"Who are you? The peachy police?" she snapped.

"Sam, come on, no one expects you to be okay right now," Freddie said. "Carly just left for Italy. That's gonna take some getting used to for you."

Sam didn't reply as she continued to search through her drawers.

"I mean," Freddie continued. "It's not like Carly's never going to come back. She will…some day. And in the meantime we all still have each other here; you, me, Gibby, and Spencer. If you think about it, this whole thing might wind up being a little harder on Carly than it is on us. We lost one friend, she lost all of hers, and she's going to a country where they don't even speak too much English with a whole bunch of new people…it's gonna be rough."

"Carly's tougher than you think, she'll get through it," Sam said, grabbing an armload of clothes from her drawer and walking across the room to stuff them in her backpack.

"Yeah…she's gonna be okay," Freddie said softly. "We all will."

"Yup," Sam said plainly. "So did Spencer send you to come find me when I didn't come back up?"

"No…I offered to come check on you on my own," Freddie told her.

"Why?" Sam asked.

"Because," he said. "I-I thought maybe you would want to talk."

"Well we just did," Sam said. "Carly's in Italy, we're all fine, blah, blah, blah."

"No, not about that," Freddie mumbled, looking down at his lap awkwardly.

"Well then what about?" Sam asked, yanking a few shirts off hangers in her closet.

"Well, um, you-you know how you called me earlier today?" Freddie said. "And you said you had to talk to me about something important, and I said-"

"Do you want to get back together," Sam finished for him.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded lamely. "I just figured we should probably discuss it."

"Dude, there's nothing to discuss," Sam shrugged, looking at a pair of boots, and then tossing them back into her closet. "It was just something that slipped out. Don't worry about it."

"Well, that's just it, Sam," Freddie sighed. "I-I don't think it just 'slipped out'."

"What do you mean?" Sam frowned.

"I mean, things like that don't just slip out, without meaning" Freddie said. "I think, well, I _know_, actually, that that question has been up there for awhile."

Sam stared at him. "Oh…"

"Yeah," Freddie said awkwardly. "Look, um…I-sorry. I didn't mean to just spring this on you."

"It's cool," Sam mumbled. "And…I guess we _did _sort of agree that we'd consider giving us another go after awhile."

"We did," Freddie nodded.

"Yeah, if I became more normal and you became more abnormal," Sam said, trying to cram a pair of boats into her backpack, with no success. "And I don't think either of us really managed to do that, do you?"

"No," Freddie sighed. "I'm still a nerdy nub, and you're still an aggressive she-demon…So I guess-I guess we're really not meant to be with each other then."

Sam shrugged. "Looks like it," she said softly, heading to her desk to untangle her Pearbook charger.

Freddie slowly got to his feet. "Sam…no."

"No what?" she asked.

"I-I don't believe that; that we're not meant to be with each other just because one of us is too normal and the other is too abnormal."

"But we said-"

"I know what we said that night," Freddie said. "But you remember what else we said?"

"I love you," Sam nodded, her cheeks reddening a bit.

"Yeah…" Freddie whispered. "And I know I don't know that much about love, and you probably don't either, but I don't think love goes away just because two people are different."

Sam looked over at him. "So you still mean it then?"

"Never stopped," Freddie smiled weakly.

Sam looked down at her feet. "Me neither," she said in a voice so quiet Freddie barely heard it.

"Well then what do we do?" Freddie asked her. "If we both still love each other…do we-okay, _what _are you doing?"

Sam was now trying to stuff a bag of pork rinds into her already jammed backpack.

"I guess I can just get more of these later," Sam said sadly, tossing the bag into the abyss of her room.

"Why are you trying to cram half your room into your backpack?" Freddie frowned.

"I'm packing," Sam said.

"Okay…_for_?"

Sam took a deep breath. "I'm leaving Seattle."

Freddie nearly fell back onto the three-legged chair behind him. "_What_?"

"I-I just feel like I need to get out of here," Sam told him. "You know, after tonight. I mean, I lost my best friend, we're not doing iCarly anymore, which, let's face it, was the only really productive thing I had going for me…I just think it's time for me to move on."

"Um, move on _where _exactly?" Freddie said. "You're not even eighteen yet, Sam. You can't just get up and move all by yourself! What about your mom? What about school?"

"I doubt my mom will even notice I'm gone for at least another three or four weeks," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "And when she does, as long as I'm not like, dying on the streets or something, she'll be fine with it. And a lot of kids do that online school thing, so I figure I can handle it."

"So-So what you just told me," Freddie said, feeling hurt for the second time that night. "That doesn't mean anything to you?"

Sam sat down on her bed. "I _did _mean it. I _do _love you."

"Well then why are you leaving Seattle?" Freddie asked. "Why? When we could give _us _another chance?"

"We've been broken up for over a year," Sam said. "Why are you only talking about getting back together _now_? Why not sooner?"

"I-I don't know," Freddie admitted. "I mean, its only been a few weeks since I've really been thinking about it…since I've really realized that maybe us breaking up wasn't the _smartest _thing to do. Lately it just seems like whenever you're around, I sort of wanted to ask you that question. But I was just too scared to do it."

Sam nodded. "Well, Freddie…maybe-maybe you're acting on this too quickly. Like you just said; you've only had that thought for a few weeks."

"But isn't that plenty of time to realize that I _did _want to ask you that question?" Freddie pointed out.

"I don't know," Sam shrugged. "But what I do know is that the last time one of us did something crazy like this to make us get back together…it barely lasted a month."

"I don't think this is quite as crazy as you kissing me in the lock-in," Freddie said.

"True," Sam said. "But for you, it is."

"So you're saying you don't want to get back together then?" Freddie sighed. "Okay, I-"

"No," Sam said quickly. "I'm not saying that at all."

"Well then why are you leaving-"

"Freddie, if you had asked me this a week ago, or even _yesterday_, I would've said yes," Sam said. "Because you aren't the only one who's been thinking about us lately. But after tonight, after everything that happened…I just don't think either one of us could really handle it right now."

"Because Carly left?" Freddie frowned. "Sam, we can do this without her. It won't be like last time-"

"How do you know that?" Sam asked.

"Well I don't for sure-"

"What if we got back together," Sam said softly. "And then for some reason, we broke up?"

"Well then…then we would go back to being friends," Freddie said.

"Would we?" Sam asked, raising her eyebrow. "When we broke up the first time, the thing that really helped us get past that awkward stage of going from a couple to exes and back to friends was being together to do iCarly and hanging out in Carly's apartment. But we wouldn't have that this time. If we broke up, I-I'm just scared that we would lose each other as friends. And after tonight, after realizing what that really feels like…I don't think I could handle doing it again."

Freddie sighed. She had a point.  
"Wow," he said, chuckling a little to himself. "Who knew Sam Puckett could be so…wise?"

"I'm starting to freak myself out a little too," Sam grinned.

"Sam," Freddie said, stepping closer to her. "I don't think I could handle losing you as a friend either. But…that doesn't mean when I asked you if you wanted to get back together that I wasn't hoping for a yes. I love you. I'll always love you as a friend, but deep down, I want to love you as more, too."

Sam smiled up at him. "I do too."

"Well then we're back to where we were ten minutes ago," Freddie said. "What do we do?"

Sam zipped up her backpack and swung it around her shoulder. "I'm still leaving."

"And there's nothing I can do to convince you to stay?" Freddie asked.

She shook her head. "No…I need to go."

Freddie nodded. "Alright then."

"But," Sam said. "I'm not going forever. How about we make a deal? When I come back to Seattle, we meet up, and…and if we both realize we feel the same way, and that us both wanting to get back together wasn't just some quick thought we both had…then we'll do it."

"I like that," Freddie said thoughtfully. "It-It's actually really smart…If we both don't lose these feelings after being apart for some time, then they must really be true."

"Exactly," Sam said. "Wow…maybe that motorcycle Spencer gave me gave me a sudden boost in smartness."

"Nah, you've always been smart…in your own way," Freddie told her.

"Thanks," Sam laughed.

"I'm gonna miss you," Freddie said.

"And I'll miss your nubby butt too," Sam said, her eyes sparkling.

"Where-Where are you going to go?" Freddie asked.

"I don't know," Sam sighed. "Maybe California…it's really nice down there."

"Yeah, it is," Freddie mumbled. "Hey, promise to let me know when you get to wherever you stop?"

"Come on, just because I'm leaving doesn't mean we're not staying in touch, Benson," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Good," Freddie said.

"Anyway…" Sam said. "I-I should probably get going. Tell-Tell Gib and Spence I said bye, will you?"

"I will," Freddie nodded. "I-I'll walk you down."

The two walked down to the curb in front of the Puckett house to Sam's new motorcycle.

"Well…" Freddie said, trying to keep his voice steady. "I guess this is it then."

"Yeah," Sam said, staring at the bike. She turned around and stood one her toes and gently pressed her lips to his.

At once Freddie threw his arms around her, holding her tightly.

"Take care of yourself," he whispered to her, burying his face in her blonde curls.

"You too," Sam said as they pulled apart.

Freddie watched her hop onto her motorcycle and rev up the engine. She looked over her shoulder at him. "See you."

"Bye," Freddie said, giving her a small smirk. "I'll be here."

Sam quickly turned back around and drove her motorcycle down her street and around the corner.

That was the hardest thing she ever had to do…she just hoped that she did the right thing.


	331. Chapter 331

**AN-So this is sort of like iDate Sam and Freddie, but with Emma and Quincy.**

…**.**

_Propaganda_

"Hey Freddie? Guess what?" Gibby grinned, walking into the Benson house with a bag. "I bought us matching shirts!"

"Um…what?" Freddie frowned.

"You know, since our kids are dating now," Gibby said, tossing Freddie the bag. "We're practically brothers now, right?"

"Not even close," Freddie said, pulling out a bright green polo shirt.

"Hey daddy," Ashton said, walking into the house with Clarissa. "Um, _where _did you get that shirt?"

"I bought it for him!" Gibby said proudly, holding up his own matching shirt. "It's like we're twins!"

"Wow…" Clarissa said. "That's really-"

"Something," Ashton finished.

"See, _they _appreciate it," Gibby said. "Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to go see if Hey Foods has restocked their pudding aisle."

"Where's Emma?" Freddie asked Ashton as Gibby left the house.

"Probably making out with Quincy," she shrugged.

"Ah!" Freddie cried, covering his ears.

"What?"

"Don't tell me that stuff!" Freddie cringed, getting to his feet.

"You asked," Ashton pointed out.

"Well now I have to go wash my ears out," Freddie mumbled, getting to his feet and heading upstairs.

"I thought your dad was okay with Emma and Quincy dating," Clarissa said to Ashton.

"Eh, he is," Ashton shrugged as the two girls sat down on the couch and turned on the T.V. "He just freaks out whenever me or Em even mention kissing guys. He likes to think that dating means just holding hands and stuff."

Just then the front door slammed open and Emma stormed in. "I need a Fat Cake!" she snapped, storming into the kitchen.

"What's wrong?" Clarissa asked as her and Ashton followed her into the kitchen.

"Emma!" Quincy said, running into the house after his girlfriend. "Emma, I was _talking _to you!"

"Fine? What do you want to say?" Emma said, crossing her arms as she stepped closer to him.

"I know that you thought you were-"

"Nope, wrong thing to say," Emma said, turning around and stomping over to the pantry.

"Okay you guys, what's wrong?" Ashton sighed.

"Nothing," Emma mumbled, taking an angry bite from her Fat Cake.

"After school today, some of the football players were making fun of the pottery club," Quincy sighed.

"Yeah, you said they were being real jerks," Emma said.

"That didn't mean I wanted revenge!"

"Wait," Clarissa frowned, looking over at Emma. "What'd you do?"

"I threw pots at all of them," Emma said simply.

"She gave the quarterback a concussion," Quincy said.

"He'll be fine," Emma said, rolling her eyes.

"Yes but you can't just-"

"Guys, guys," Ashton said, cutting them off. "Look, Emma. Quincy should be able to tell you things like that without having to worry about whether or not you'll throw pots at star athletes."

Emma looked down at her feet, saying nothing.

"And Quincy," Clarissa continued. "Emma obviously did that because she cares about you, and didn't like those guys making fun of you like that."

Quincy looked at Emma. "I guess they're right…I'm sorry."

"Me too," Emma said, showing him a small smile. She stood on her toes as the couple gave each other a quick kiss.

"Ah!" Freddie said, shielding his eyes as he walked into the kitchen. "Enough with the kissing!"

…..

"Man, Inside-Out Burger really knows how to make good fries," Emma commented as her and Quincy sat inside the fast food restaurant, sharing a basket of curly fries.

"I know, right?" Quincy grinned. "Hey, so can I ask you a question?"

"Maybe," Emma smirked.

"When did you first start to like me?"

Emma rolled her eyes. "You really wanna know?"

"I do."

"Okay," Emma said. "Do you remember the time when you and your parents were over at my place for Tyler's birthday and I stuffed cake down your shirt and pushed you into the pool?"

"Vaguely, yes," Quincy chuckled.

"Well…I dunno, I just thought you looked sort of hot," Emma shrugged. "You know, all soaking wet and cakey."

"I guess that makes up for my ruined kakis then," Quincy chuckled.

"Well yeah," Emma nodded.

"Hey, you kids a couple?" a man asked, coming over to the teens' table.

"Yeah," Quincy replied. "Why?"

"I," the man said, handing Emma a large grapefruit. "Am the manager of this fine eating establishment, and I would like to offer to you two a _complimentary _love grapefruit."

"What makes it a love grapefruit?" Emma frowned.

"I dunno," the owner shrugged.

"Well…thanks," Quincy said.

"That will twenty bucks," the owner said, holding his hand out to Quincy.

"But you just said it was complimentary!" Quincy exclaimed.

"Yeah, but you see the fancy sticker on that baby?" the owner said, pointing the dime sized sticker on the fruit. "That was made in Norway by orphans."

"Dude, just give him the money," Emma said, rolling her eyes.

"No way!" Quincy said firmly. "What sticker is worth twenty bucks?"

"Um, maybe one for your _girlfriend_?" Emma snapped. "I can't believe you're being so cheap!"

"I can't believe you're being so demanding with my money!"

"Boyfriends are supposed to be _generous_ with their money!" Emma said hotly.

"Well girlfriends are supposed to be _appreciative _of their boyfriends!" Quincy retorted.

"You know what?" Emma said loudly, getting to her feet. "Let's go see what Ashton and Clarissa think."

"Fine!" Quincy said, standing up as well.

"Hey!" the owner yelled as the couple stormed out of the restaurant. "What about my twenty bucks? Bring back my fancy fruit sticker at least!"

…..

"What do you think of this prom dress, mom?" Ashton asked as her and Clarissa sat on the couch, flipping through magazines.

"Um, it's nice," Sam said, looking up from her Pearpad. "But your prom isn't until next year."

"It's never too early to start planning for it," Clarissa said.

"Aw…you never stood a chance with Carly as your mom," Sam smiled.

"Good, you're both here!" Emma said furiously as her and Quincy clambered through the front door.

"And this seems like a whole bunch of teenage drama that I really don't need to be involved with," Sam said, heaving herself up off the couch. "Later!"

"We need you two to help us settle something," Quincy said to Ashton and Clarissa.

"Again? Why do we always have to?" Ashton moaned.

"Because you're all impartial and junk," Emma pointed out.

"Oh…well, we are, aren't we?" Clarissa said proudly to Ashton. "What's the problem?"

"Quincy's being stingy," Emma said, glaring at her boyfriend.

"She wanted me to shell out _twenty bucks _for some love grapefruit at Inside-Out Burger," Quincy said.

"What made it a love grapefruit?" Clarissa asked.

"Who knows? But that's not important!" Emma exclaimed.

"For twenty bucks I could've gone and bought you that _Galaxy Wars _t-shirt you wanted!" Quincy said.

Emma raised an eyebrow. "Well then what are you waiting for?"

"Emma, I'm not gonna go buy you the shirt-"

"Then why'd you say you-"

"Okay, guys!" Ashton said. "Look, if a guy and a girl are in a relationship, a guy should enjoy treating his girl to romantic grapefruit, or any fruit for that matter, once in awhile."

"Ha!" Emma said triumphantly.

"But a good girlfriend doesn't _demand _things from her boyfriend," Clarissa added.

"Ha!" Quincy said loudly, earning him a strange look from the three girls.

"So Quincy, maybe you should be a little more flexible with your wallet," Ashton said. "And Emma, you should be a little more _polite_ about his wallet."  
Quincy sighed and turned to Emma. "I think I can live with that."

Emma nodded. "Me too."

"Good, now kiss and make up so you can get back to being all happy," Clarissa said as the couple exchanged quick kisses.

"Come on," Quincy said when they pulled apart. "Let's get down to the comic book store and get you some _Galaxy Wars _props."

"Aw, you're the best!" Emma grinned, giving him another quick kiss.

…

"Ashton! Wake up!" Emma said, late the next night, shaking her twin awake.

"Huh? What?" Ashton sputtered sleepily, sitting up and turning on her lamp by her bed. "Emma? What the heck is the matter with you? It's two in the morning! And is that-why is Quincy on your laptop screen?"

"We were web chatting," Emma said quickly. "And you will never believe what _he _said!"

"No, you won't believe what _she _said!" Quincy said loudly from the computer screen. "She thinks that your dad is more embarrassing than my dad."

"Because it's true!"

"Oh, right!" Quincy said, rolling his eyes. "My dad showed up at school last year to pick me up in his _swimsuit_!"

"Well _my _dad made a huge scene at the sporting goods store because someone told him fencing wasn't a real sport!" Emma retorted.

"My dad won't buy any cereal with pictures of elves on it because he's convinced that it's really just propaganda from the government to fuel some big elf take over!" Quincy argued.

"And my dad tried to act all cool at the waterpark over the summer and sound up falling down the waterslide with his clothes on!"

"Hey!" Ashton said loudly. "Both of them are embarrassing nut jobs, okay? So now can you two let me _sleep_?"

"But dad's way worse than his dad!" Emma exclaimed.

"Is not! Does your dad have an entire room in your house dedicated to liquid soap?"

"Does your dad take you on yearly trips to stupid train stations?"

"That's nothing compared to the soap!"

"And I'm sleeping on the couch," Ashton mumbled, dragging her feet out of her room downstairs, leaving Emma and Quincy to their argument.

….

"You think I should bid on this autographed football for Tyler?" Freddie asked Sam as Sam slid tray of cupcakes into the oven.

"Depends, which player signed it?"

"I dunno…some quarterback," Freddie shrugged. "Apparently he threw a pass really far or something…that's what quarterbacks do, right?"

"Very good, baby," Sam said, giving him a quick kiss. "You actually got something right about football!"

"Oh don't patronize me," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Mom, dad," Ashton said, joining her parents. "I need my own room."

"Okay well you start heading outside then and I'll pick up all the supplies you need to build an extra room for this house," Sam said. "Because in case you haven't noticed, Ash, we're full."

"Why do you want your own room?" Freddie asked. "Did you and Emma fight or something?"

"No! _We're _not fighting!" Ashton said. "Her and Quincy are! Do you know how many times I got woken up by Emma last week to settle some stupid little argument between those two? Five! I always have to wind up coming down here to sleep on the couch, which is _uncomfortable _because daddy's cheap and wouldn't spring for the good sofa!"

"Wow, aren't you all fired up?" Sam smirked.

"Sorry, it's just…those two are driving me and Clarissa crazy. They always come to us to try and get us to solve their problems for them," Ashton sighed.

"Well sweetie, if they're getting to you, why don't you just tell them you don't want to have to help them with every little thing?" Freddie asked. "I mean I know you want to help your sister and all-"

"Pfft, yeah right," Ashton sneered. "The only reason I'm putting up with those two is for Quincy. I mean, let's face it, that kid won't find another girlfriend for years. Emma's hot, she can get another guy like that if she wants."

"What does she mean 'like that'?" Freddie frowned, looking over at Sam.

"And I mean, they_ are_ sort of sweet together," Ashton continued, ignoring Freddie's comment. "You know, when they're not trying to kill each other…"

"Eh, they'll learn to solve their own problems soon," Sam told her daughter. "They're just in new territory right now."

"Yeah, I guess," Ashton sighed. "Anyway, I'm gonna go try and get a few hours sleep while I have the room to myself."

"We should probably talk to Emma later," Freddie said as Ashton headed upstairs. "You know, tell her to try and start working these things out without dragging her sister and Clarissa into it. I mean, that _is _a little ridiculous."

"Yeah, tell me about it," Sam nodded, taking Freddie's laptop from him. "Hey? What's this? You're _selling _my werewolf statue?"

"You told me I could!" Freddie told her.

"I did no such thing!"

"Yes, you I could sell your werewolf so we could make room for the new lawnmower we have to buy because _you _ran over the hose!"

"No, I said you could sell my werewolf _spatula,_" Sam said.

"Okay, who needs a werewolf spatula?" Freddie frowned.

"Well that's why I told you to sell it!"

"How is selling a _spatula _going to make room for a lawnmower, Sam?" Freddie sighed.

"I don't know! Maybe you should sell your stupid pool table!"

"That's it!" Freddie said, standing up and grabbing his car keys. "Let's go pay Carly a visit!"

…..

"That dress is cute," Clarissa said, going through Emma's closet with her.

"Not with the shoes she wants to wear, though," Ashton pointed out.

"Fine, I'll change the shoes," Emma said, taking the dress Clarissa had pointed out. "Hey, you two busy tonight?"

"Nope, we were gonna hang out at my place and try to get a web chat going with Mike Donahue," Clarissa grinned. "You know, since he apparently just broke up with his girlfriend."

"Well cancel that, you're coming to dinner with me and Quincy tonight," Emma said.

"What?" Ashton frowned. "Why? Isn't the point of you two going on this little date to be _alone _with each other?"

"Nah, we'll just wind up fighting before we even get out appetizers," Emma replied, pulling on her dress.

"But-But-" Clarissa sighed, looking over at Ashton.

"Come on guys, please?" Emma begged. "You're so good at coming up with cool ways for us to compromise!"

"Well yeah," Clarissa nodded. "But-"

"We're going to Pini's," Emma added. "Think of that lasagna…"

"Okay fine," Ashton conceded.

"We'll go," Clarissa nodded. "But you better hope Mike's still single tomorrow night."

….

"Wow, this lasagna never disappoints," Quincy said as him and Emma began to dig into their dinners.

"I know," Emma said, sprinkling some Parmesan cheese onto her lasagna. She opened up her purse and pulled out a little bottle of ketchup and began globing it onto her plate.

"Um…do you have to put ketchup on _everything_ you eat?" Quincy frowned.

"What does it matter to you? You don't have to eat it," Emma pointed out.

"I know, but I just think that in a fancy place like Pini's, it might be frowned upon to-"

"Oh don't worry," Emma snapped. "I already bought this ketchup on my _own_."

"I didn't mean-Ashton! Clarissa!"

Ashton and Clarissa, who had been sitting boredly at a nearby table, groaned as they got to their feet.

"Quincy, it's not nice to pick on other people's weird ketchup habits," Clarissa sighed.

"Emma, Italian food doesn't need ketchup, it's gross," Ashton mumbled, rolling her eyes.

"Sorry," Emma muttered.

"Me too," Quincy nodded.

"Guys, come on, if we're going to be forced to be here, can't we at least sit with you guys?" Clarissa asked.

"No!" Emma exclaimed. "This is a date!"

"Whatever," Ashton snapped. "Come on, Clarissa. Let's leave them alone for ten minutes before we need to come over again…"

Quincy began to cut his lasagna and the used a spoon to scoop the lasagna into his mouth.

"Who the heck eats lasagna like that?" Emma snickered.

"Um, me?" Quincy said.

"You're supposed to eat it like a normal person with just a knife and fork," Emma said. "Not with a spoon too!"

"Oh, so I'm not allowed to say anything about you ketchup habits, but you're allowed to insult my _silverware _usage?"

"You make it so easy though!" Emma snapped. She turned over to Clarissa and Ashton's table. "Clarissa? Isn't it weird for someone to be eating lasagna with a spoon?"

"Ashton? Isn't it wrong for someone to hound someone for the way he eats his food?"

"Yes!" Ashton said furiously, jumping to her feet.

"And yes!" Clarissa nodded as the two girls stormed over to the couple's table.

"I can't believe you would sit there and cut up your stinking lasagna with a fork and a knife, and then go to the trouble to take it _off _your fork and use a _spoon _to eat it!" Ashton snapped a Quincy. "I mean come on!"

"And I can't believe _you _would sit there and criticize someone else's eating habits!" Clarissa said to Emma.

"Whoa, what's going on with you two," Emma frowned.

"Yeah, aren't you supposed to be the ones helping us _solve _our problems?"

"No, we're not dating either one of you!" Clarissa said hotly. "So we shouldn't have to deal with your stupid relationship problems!"

"Yeah," Ashton agreed. "You two need to learn to work out your own problems…or maybe you should be dating at all."

Emma and Quincy looked down at their laps, embarrassed.

"Come on," Clarissa said, grabbing the bucket of breadsticks from the table. "Let's go see if Mike's online to web chat."


	332. Chapter 332

_Goodness_

"Unbelievable," Freddie sighed, letting himself into the Shay's apartment.

"What's up, Fredo?" Spencer asked, looking up from the horse sculpture he had been working on.

"You'll see," Freddie said, crossing his arms, looking at the front door. "In five, four, three, two-"

"You can't do that, Sam! That totally violates the rules we drew up!" Carly said loudly as her and Sam stormed into the apartment.

"No it does not!" Sam snapped as the girls threw their bags down.

"It does too!"

"Well it's a lot better than what _you _wanted to do!" Sam retorted.

"Whoa, what's going on with _you _two?" Spencer frowned.

"Sam and I are in a bit of a…competition," Carly explained, glaring at her best friend.

"Competition?" Spencer repeated.

"There's a new guy at school who got the locker between them, and they both like him," Freddie said, rolling his eyes as he headed to the kitchen.

"Because he's adorable!" Carly defended.

"Yeah, that boy could be a model or something," Sam nodded.

"So…you both want to date him then?" Spencer asked.

"Duh," Carly replied. "But the problem is…we can't decide who should get to go for him. It's the same problem we had with Shane a few years ago; we both saw him at the same time so we can't use the girl code to determine who gets him."

"So we have to make _him _pick," Sam added. "I mean, it sort of worked with Shane…"

"He fell down an elevator shaft and broke like, half his bones!" Freddie exclaimed.

"He lived," Carly mumbled. "And just so you guys know, _Brendan _will be coming by here to watch iCarly live tonight…he was _so _happy when I invited him. He said of course he'd come."

"Hm, maybe that's because he was already invited by _me_," Sam smirked.

"You can't just invite people over to my _home_!" Carly said indignantly.

"That was never specified," Sam grinned triumphantly.

"Yeah, well…" Carly frowned. "I'm gonna go upstairs and make myself all hot for Brendan!"

"The show doesn't start for three hours," Spencer pointed out.

"Oh man, I thought I had more time than that!" Carly cried, rushing upstairs.

….

"Okay, how do I look?" Carly said, coming downstairs, wearing a new pink dress and cute boats.

"Nice," Freddie said, not looking up from his Pearbook.

"You didn't even look!" Carly said, putting her hands on her hips.

Freddie looked up. "You look very nice, Carly," he said, chuckling.

"Thank you," Carly said happily. "Is Sam here yet? Her and I need to go over a few last things for our walnut bit."

Right on cue, Sam walked into the apartment, and when he saw her, Freddie nearly dropped her laptop. She was wearing a pair of dark jeans and purple top that showed off her curves perfectly.

"Foul!" Carly cried, looking at her best friend.

"What foul?" Sam demanded.

"We agreed to keep this a level playing field!"

"Yeah, so?" Sam shrugged. "You're dressed up, I'm dressed up. Level playing field."

"No, _not _a level playing field!" Carly said.

"How?" Sam said, crossing her arms.

"Because," Carly said, lowering her voice slightly, thought Freddie could still hear her. "You happen to have two…_attributes _that I don't have and you're just flaunting them!"

"I'm not flaunting anything, Carls," Sam said, amused, as she headed over to the fridge.

Freddie quickly looked down at his laptop so Sam wouldn't notice that he had been staring. Though he felt as if the temperature in the room had gone up quite a bit.

"Oh don't give me that, Puckett!" Carly snapped.

"And like that push-up bra you're wearing doesn't count as flaunting," Sam pointed out.

"Freddie," Carly said. "Don't you think this counts as a foul on her part?"

"I'm gonna stay out of this, thank you very much," Freddie said, hurrying upstairs, leaving his two friends to their argument.

…

"Wow, this is pretty funny stuff," Brendan laughed as he stood by Freddie's tech cart as iCarly was just wrapping up.

"Yeah, they're really good," Freddie nodded. As much as he hated to admit it, Brendan actually seemed like a pretty decent guy.

"And so until next time," Carly said to the camera. "_Always _treat your televisions with respect."

"And just say no to exercise," Sam grinned.

"An we're clear," Freddie said, turning off his camera. "Really great show you-"

"So Brendan, what'd you think?" Carly smiled as her and Sam ran past Freddie.

"Sure," Freddie mumbled to himself.

"I like it, you two were _hilarious_," Brendan said.

"Aw, thanks," Sam said, touching his shoulder.

"Well I wrote a lot of it," Carly said, putting her hand on Brendan's other shoulder.

"But all the _real _funny parts were all me," Sam said.

"Oh, well, um…good-good teamwork then," Brendan frowned.

"Hey Brendan, are you thirsty?" Carly asked. "I could totally bring you up some blue tea."

"I bet your hungry," Sam said quickly. "How's some fruit kabobs sound?"

"Um, they bother sound great," Brendan nodded.

"Well then back in a flash!" Carly said, scrambling for the elevator, Sam at her heels.

"Wow, they're real…nice," Brendan commented as the girls left the studio.

"Yeah, they can be _real _nice when they want," Freddie mumbled.

"Um, hey, listen Freddie," Brendan sighed. "Not too sound too conceited or anything, but do you think that maybe the two of them, kind of, maybe sort of…have a thing for me?"

"They're making it that obvious, huh?" Freddie laughed.

"A little, yeah," Brendan shrugged.

"Well, they both seem to think you're a nice guy," Freddie sighed, setting his camera down.

"Oh, well…that's awesome," Brendan said. "I think they're real cool too. I just wish they weren't, you know, competing with each other. I mean this morning after study hall, Carly gave me a fresh plate of cookies and Sam tried one up her with brownies. I thought they were best friends."

"They are," Freddie assured him. "They just get a little crazy with guys sometimes. I'm sure if you were to pick one of them to go out with, they'd stop all this madness and go back to being normal."

"Well…I do sort of want to ask one of them out," Brendan said. "But like I said, they're both so great. They're cute, funny, sweet-"

"Clearly you don't know Sam too well yet," Freddie chuckled to himself under his breath.

"What was that?" Brendan asked.  
"Nothing," Freddie said quickly.

"Um, hey, I don't know if you'd be comfortable helping me out with this," Brendan said slowly. "Especially since you and I don't really know each other two well yet. But um…what do you think?"

"Huh?" Freddie frowned.

"You know…which girl do you think I should pick to go out with?" Brendan asked. "I mean, word around school is that you've dated both of them, right?"

"Well, yeah, I guess," Freddie nodded.

"So do you think you could give me a little advice?" Brendan asked.

Freddie leaned against his tech cart. Was this guy really asking which of his ex-girlfriends he should go out with? That was definitely an…interesting question. What guy wanted to be asked _that_? But he realized that helping Brendan pick one of the girls to go out with him would probably be the only way to end Carly and Sam's crazy competition between each other. So the question then became…which one of his exes would it bother him the least to see go out with a new, more attractive, guy?

He thought about this for a few moments before slowly opening his mouth to give Brendan his answer.

"Carly," he said. "You-You should ask Carly out. She's great, she's like, the definition of sweetness and goodness…I think you two would make a perfect couple."

"You know…I think you're right," Brendan nodded thoughtfully. "Wow, thanks Freddie. I'll ask her out tomorrow at school."

…

Freddie was at the locker the next day at school, placing a few books in his locker after his last class.

"Hey, Freddie?" Carly said, approaching him.

"Oh, hey Carls," Freddie said. He wondered whether Brendan had asked her out.

"Um, have you seen Sam?" Carly asked. "I-I sort of wanted to talk to her."

"No," Freddie replied, closing his locker. "What do you need her for?"

"Well…Brendan asked me out," she told him, and Freddie could tell she was trying hard not look too excited.

"Oh…he did?" Freddie said. "Well then, congratulations, right? You won."

"I know," Carly sighed. "But I feel really bad now. For Sam."

"Oh…right," Freddie sighed. "She's upset?"

"Well, she told me she was happy for me and everything, but I still think she's a little sad," Carly said. "And I just want to make sure everything's good between us. I mean, as cute and awesome as Brendan might be, I don't want him to ruin our friendship."

"I'm sure Sam's fine," Freddie assured her. "But I'll let you know if I hear from her."  
"Thanks," Carly said, relieved. "I've got to go now, but I'll see you later at rehearsal, okay?"

"Okay," Freddie smiled.

He leaned against his locker as Carly hurried off. He was responsible for this; he just hoped Sam wasn't feeling too bad right now. Maybe he was being selfish when he told Brendan to go out with Carly. But he just didn't think he would be able to keep his cool if it had been Sam who had run up to him, all excited, telling him she won that little contest.

Freddie started out of the high school and towards the park across the street. Carly said she hadn't been able to find Sam, but Freddie had a feeling he knew exactly where she was.

Sure enough, he spotted the blonde sitting underneath a large tree close to the small pond; this was the spot they had often gone to after school back when they were a couple. They both said that it was the most peaceful place the knew.

Freddie sat down next to her, and she looked up from the blade of grass she had been toying with in her fingers.

"Oh…it's you."

"Yup, it's me," Freddie nodded. "I didn't know you still came here too."

"Just once in awhile," Sam mumbled. She looked down at her lap. "So I'm guessing Carly told you the news?"

"Yeah," Freddie said. "But she was just looking for you. She wanted to talk to you; to make sure you two were okay."

Sam shrugged. "She won fair and square. What do I have to be mad at her for. Besides…it's not like this was any big surprise, right?"

Freddie frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Come on," Sam said. "This isn't the first time Carly's been a guy's first pick. I mean the same thing happened with that dude at the Groovy Smoothie. And the guy we met at the movies. And the guy on the third floor of your building."

"Sam-" Freddie started.

"Don't worry about it, okay?" Sam said quickly. "It doesn't matter. So guys like my best friend better…I'll get over it. All I have to do is wait for Carly to get married or something so she'll be off the market."

"Not all guys prefer Carly over you," Freddie said softly.

"Pfft," Sam scoffed. "Name one guy who has ever preferred me over Carly."

"Me," he said simply, looking right into her eyes.

Sam looked taken aback. "You?"

"Well…yeah," Freddie nodded.

"You're just saying that," Sam mumbled. "You loved Carly."

"Yes…when I was thirteen, and also 'loved' computers, _Galaxy Wars_, and fencing," Freddie said.

"You still love all that stuff," Sam pointed out.

"I know," Freddie said. "But now that I'm older, I realize that there are different types of love. There's the type of love you have things that are just, you know, important to you. And then there's the love you feel for just one person when you know that you're _in _love with them. And now I know that what I feel for Carly is definitely that first type of love. She's someone who means a lot to me, but I'm not _in _love with her."

"Oh…" Sam said, looking out at the pond. "So you-you really preferred me over her then? You thought I was, you know, the better girlfriend?"

"What can I say? You kept me on my toes," Freddie grinned.

"Well, um," Sam said, clearing her throat. "Thanks…I guess." She got to her feet. "I'm gonna go find Carly…let her know that there's no hard feelings about Brendan."

"Alright," Freddie nodded.

He watched as Sam walked away. He knew he would always love Carly. She was practically his sister; one of his best friends who had always been there for him.

But he also knew, deep down, that he'd always be _in _love with Sam…and each day that he couldn't work up the courage to tell her that was getting tougher and tougher.


	333. Chapter 333

**AN-Happy birthday to purpleseddielove! Hope you have a great one!**

**Also, this oneshot is a sequel to chapter 319, where Sam decided to leave Seattle after seeing Freddie and Carly kiss in iGoodbye. **

…

_Ordinary_

_Well then_, Freddie thought to himself as he headed out of the Shay's apartment with his video camera. _I guess it's really over then_.

How could so much have happened in a matter of just a few hours? When he woke up this morning, everything was normal. And now…one of his best friends was on her way to her new home in Italy and the longest chapter of his life, iCarly, had just ended.

He slowly looked back at the Shay's door. He wondered how often he'd be going there now. Sure, he'd try and keep up with Spencer, but he figured the artist would try to take his mind off of things by maybe starting over; really focusing on his art and possibly even making a few friends his own age.

He sighed and turned to head back into his own apartment, which was completely empty. His mom was working the night shift at the hospital, and T-Bo had gone down to the Groovy Smoothie shortly after he had said goodbye to Carly to try and piece together some new fangled blenders he had ordered.

He dragged his feet into his room, ignoring his mother's note on the coffee table telling him to steam his pajamas for ticks, and fell back onto his bed.

He didn't know exactly how to feel right now…sad? Because iCarly had ended and Carly moved? Angry at her father for instigating the events? Happy for Carly, for getting to finally spend some real time with her dad, like he knew she had been wanting to for years?

He gave a soft chuckle. Maybe he should take a leaf from Sam's book and just burry all his feelings with meat.

Sam…he sat up, frowning. He had just realized that Sam had never come back up after riding down with Carly an hour ago; had she gone home? Probably. He was certain that as bad he felt right now, Sam's pain exceeded his. Carly meant more to her than he could ever comprehend; the two were practically sisters! And he knew that Sam was used to having things ripped away from her, but Carly? Carly was usually the one who got Sam through any tough times she had to go through.

_She needs someone to talk to_, Freddie decided, pulling out his Pearphone. And for any matter, he felt that talking to someone in the same boat as him wouldn't hut him either.

But just as he was about to dial Sam's number, he paused, remembering his _last _phone conversation with her…how he had made things _very _awkward. He couldn't believe he had just blurted that out to her. What kind of moron would ask his ex-girlfriend if she wanted to get back together over the _phone_?

"It's all Gibby's fault," Freddie mumbled, remembering his little conversation with his friend as they headed towards Get-A-Head at the mall earlier that day…

…

"_You sure you don't want make a head?" Gibby asked as him and Freddie walked through the ordinary mall crowd. _

"_Quite," Freddie nodded. "My mom's already plastered our apartment with pictures of me. I don't need to see a replica of my head anywhere else around my place too." _

"_Yeah…you're not handsome enough for that kind of publicity," Gibby nodded. _

"_Well thanks," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. _

"_Whoa!" Gibby said, stopping in his tracks suddenly. "Look at those girls over there!" _

_He pointed to a couple of attractive girls standing over by a Churro cart. _

"_It's a couple of girls," Freddie shrugged. "So?" _

"_So? Look at how hot they are!" Gibby exclaimed. "Man…I'd like to go fishing with __**them**__." _

"_Fishing?" Freddie repeated, amused. _

"_It's a hot date idea!" Gibby defended. "Come on, let's go over them and see if we can get them to come to the pier with us." _

"_No," Freddie said. "I'm not really in the mood for that." _

"_But they're so hot!" _

"_Eh, I guess they're not really my type," Freddie shrugged. _

"_Dude, you've been bumming me out for the past couple of weeks with this little act of yours!" Gibby said. "You wouldn't help me talk to those girls at Hey Foods, you wouldn't be my wingman at the laundromat, and you wouldn't go through with my plan to get the cheerleaders at school to love us!" _

"_Because __**that **__was illegal!" Freddie hissed. _

"_I know what this is," Gibby said, crossing his arms and smiling at Freddie. _

"_What? Please enlighten me," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. _

"_You don't want to date any girls we see because you already __**found **__a chick you wanna date," Gibby said knowingly. "You're still into Sam, aren't you?" _

"_What?" Freddie yelped. "Are you __**crazy**__? I am not still into her! No way, uh-uh, not true. Nope." _

"_Um…I was kidding before," Gibby frowned. "But after __**that**__…maybe you do still like her." _

"_No I do not!" Freddie snapped, his cheeks flushing. _

"_No, no, Teen Chick magazine just released a list of the Ten Sure Signs of a Crush," Gibby said. "Blushing, nervousness…they're all on there." _

"_Will you drop this?" Freddie groaned. "For the millionth time, I don't still like her!" _

"_Denial's not just a river in Alaska." _

"_Egypt!" Freddie exclaimed. "The Nile is in Egypt! Honestly, did you and Sam just sleep through all of geography last year?" _

"_Wow, okay, I see," Gibby said, nodding. "After all we've been through, you don't trust me enough to tell me about your girl problems."_

"_I don't have girl problems!" Freddie said, exasperated. _

"_Come on, dude, if you want to get back together with Sam, why don't you just ask her to?" Gibby said. _

"_I don't-" Freddie started, but then he shook his head. "You know what? You're just being impossible right now. And anyway…in the hypothetical situation that I __**did **__still have feelings for Sam, which I don't, it wouldn't be as simple as just asking her if she wanted to get back together. I mean, there's no way she'd want to go out with me again." _

"_You never know," Gibby said. "I mean, she could. She's been a little nicer to you latterly, hasn't she? Or, well, nicer for Sam."_

"_I guess…maybe a little. But that doesn't mean she wants to be a couple again," Freddie replied. _

"_Fine, be a chicken with your love life," Gibby shrugged. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go get my rubber head made." _

…..

Freddie remembered how Gibby's words kept circling his mind for the rest of the mall trip. While the man at Get-A-Head showed him and Gibby his weasel, while he was buying his purse-like phone case…They were still circling when Sam had called him later, which he figured was the reason he had unceremoniously blurted out what he did to her.

But the second the words left his mouth, he realized that it had been a mistake. Maybe Gibby could get girls just by asking them to go out with him, but Gibby has some weird charm that _no one _could understand.

Sam seemed like she had been caught completely off guard; not swept off her feet, so Freddie quickly changed the subject, hoping Sam wouldn't think he was some total freak. Or, well, more of a total freak than she already thought he was.

For the rest of the day, up until Carly had announced that she was going to Italy, Freddie had been trying to figure out what to do about the situation he had gotten himself into.

Did he truly want to get back together with Sam? His first instinct answer had been yes, of course. Sam was beautiful, she was funny, spontaneous, and that month they had been together had been on of the best times of his life.

But then the more rational side of him reminded himself that even though that month had been filled with plenty of fun, it had also been felt with countless arguments and clashes that came as a result of their two very different personalities. Maybe getting back together would just be more of a strain than anything…Maybe he'd be better off with a girl more like him. Someone like…like Carly.

That had been a new thought for him. He hadn't thought of Carly in a romantic sense since they broke up over two years ago. She had always been more of a platonic sister figure, but maybe…maybe she _was_ meant to be more than that to him.

And so a new debate began in his already churning mind; did he want to be with Sam, the total opposite of him? Or someone more along the lines of Carly.

But then, the miracle came; his question was answered! As he had been cleaning up his iCarly supplies after their last web show, Carly had come in and kissed him. And from the second her lips touched his, he knew. He knew that there was a reason him and Carly never officially got together again after that whole taco truck incident. He felt nothing from the kiss. Sure, it was nice; sort of a way of saying goodbye to one of the best friends he would ever have, but in a romantic sense, the kiss was empty. And when she pulled away from him, he could tell that Carly felt the same way.

He had been so thrilled to have the feud in his head drawn to an end; so happy that as he and Carly headed out of the studio he threw his hands up in victory. He knew what he really wanted now.

So here he was, an hour later, sitting on the bed with his phone out. Now he just had to work up the courage to call Sam.

He didn't want to bring anything up to her about the possibility of rebuilding their relationship just yet; he knew she was hurting, and right now he just wanted her to know that he was there for her. So taking a deep breath, he dialed Sam's number.

But she didn't pick up.

He tried again. And then again, but he still got her voicemail. He sent her texts, but nearly half-an-hour later he still hadn't gotten a response.

"Sam," Freddie sighed. He should've figured that it wouldn't be this easy. She was probably at home now, lying in her bed, where no one would have to see the invincible Sam Puckett shed a few tears.

He quickly got to his feet and headed out of his apartment.

He reached Sam's house about twenty minutes later, and knocked on her door, but was met with the same response his phone calls received.

He was just about to knock again, when suddenly, he noticed that there was no light coming from the windows at the front of the house. Nor were there any lights coming from _any _of the lights, even Sam's room.

He trudged through the grass and rapped at Sam's window, trying to peer into it, but all he could see through the grime and dirt was an empty room.

Freddie frowned. Where would Sam be at this hour? It was nearly two in the morning! He hoped she wasn't out roaming the streets of Seattle.

_At least she has that motorcycle now_, he thought to himself, sitting down on the front steps of the Puckett house. _So she won't have to walk, wherever she is…But still, where the heck-_

Suddenly he jumped to his feet as cold realization flooded his body. Sam had that motorcycle. iCarly had just ended. Her best friend was on her way to a new continent. What else would Sam Puckett, who may play a brave front, but was secretly just as afraid of change as anyone else, if not, more, do, besides runaway from the things causing her the pain.

"She-She wouldn't-" Freddie whispered, almost desperately. "No…she wouldn't…"

But deep down, he knew the truth. Sam Puckett had run away. She had left Seattle, and it looked as if he had lost her.


	334. Chapter 334

**AN-Okay, so this oneshot actually isn't really a request like all my other oneshots here are. About a year ago, I got a request to write a really sad oneshot, and I wrote this one. But then at the last minute, I decided to just go ahead and write another one where Mrs. Benson died and put that one up instead. I kept this one though, just to have around, and I found it today when I was going through some old oneshots and figured why not put it up? Just a warning though, it's pretty sad, but I hope you still enjoy it! I'll go back to putting up the rest of the requests I have tomorrow. **

…

_Lover_

Freddie laid on the old recliner in his bedroom, staring at the ceiling. He didn't know how long he had been laying there, in the dark, and he didn't care, for he felt as if that was all he had the strength to do at that moment.

He heard the doorbell ring, but he didn't budge. He didn't want to see anybody. But he heard a key turn in the lock and the front door opened. Part of him wanted to quickly lock his bedroom door and continue his solitude, but it seemed as if he didn't even have the energy for that.

He heard footsteps coming up the stairs, and a few seconds later Spencer appeared at his doorway.

"Hi," he said softly.

"Hey," Freddie mumbled in a cracked voice.

Spencer made to sit on the bed, but then, realizing that it was perfectly made and untouched, seemed to think better of it, and instead sat himself down on the arm of Freddie's chair.

"Freddie," he said gently. "You can't just sit up here forever."

Freddie didn't reply. He didn't even look at the man.

"Here," Spencer said, handing him a sandwich. "I picked this up for you, there's more downstairs for the kids too. Eat something."

"I'm not hungry," Freddie said, even though he couldn't even remember when his last meal had been.

"Look," Spencer said. "I can't even imagine how you're feeling-"

"Don't," Freddie said firmly, finally looking at him. "Don't. Just…I'm sick of hearing that."

Spencer nodded.

Freddie slowly got to his feet and tossed the sandwich that Spencer had given him in the trash.

"Why are you here?" he asked, his voice coming out harder than he had intended.

"Because I'm worried about you," Spencer told him. "We all are. You-You don't seem well."  
For the first time in what felt like forever, Freddie cracked a smile. "Yeah, well, I've got four kids who are so depressed right now they won't even come out of their room, a ton of people knocking on my door at all hours bringing over casseroles and flowers and cards that I don't want, and I'm now a widower…so yeah, I don't think I'm doing well, Spence."

"Freddie-I-We-You need to talk to someone," Spencer sighed. "It's been a week since Sam-"

"Please don't say it," Freddie said heavily, sitting back down on the chair. He looked over at the bed on the other side of the room, and he could feel his heart squeezing as he longed more than anything to be laying in it right now with Sam at his side.

But he would never get that chance again.

"Freddie," Spencer said softly. "You-You're pushing everyone away. You won't talk to me, you won't talk to your mom, or Gibby, or-"

"If you came over here to try and get me to tell you all my feelings and stuff, you can just leave right now," Freddie said firmly. "I'm not going to sit here and tell you that I'm sad, and that I wish more than anything I could just rewind to a week ago, or that I-that I haven't been able to even sleep in our bed since she-since she-" and suddenly he couldn't control himself anymore, and he broke down.

"I can't do this, Spencer," he sobbed. "I can't. I need Sam. This isn't right, she should _be_ here."

"I know she should," Sam said, placing a comforting hand on Freddie's shoulder.

"I keep going back to that day," Freddie said, taking the tissue that Spencer handed him. "And I keep thinking…if only I had gone to the grocery store instead…then she never would've been on that sidewalk when that man…when he…"

"Don't blame yourself for what happened," Spencer said firmly.

"She didn't want to go to the store," Freddie said weakly. "She had been trying to beat this one level on some app on her Pearpad, and-and I was working, and-and we needed eggs, so I told her to go pick some up. And-And she told me to do it myself, and I told her that she wasn't even doing anything important so she should go…if I hadn't made her go…she wouldn't have been walking by that man, and she wouldn't have gotten-she wouldn't have gotten sho-"

"It's not your fault," Spencer said. "There's only one person to blame for what happened to Sam, and he's going to be rotting in a jail cell for the rest of his life. It's more than he deserves."

"I just want her back," Freddie said weakly. "I-What am I supposed to do without her? I can't just get on with my life! It's like no matter what I do, all I can think about is Sam."

"That's normal," Spencer told him.

Freddie scoffed. "No. Normal would be if Sam was here right now telling me how much of a-how much of a nub I'm being. Nothing about this is normal."

"I-I just meant that what you're feeling right now…there's nothing wrong with that," Spencer said. "Sam was your _wife_. But-But you can't lock yourself in this room forever. It's important for you to realize that you're surrounded by people who love you and are here to help get you through this."

"I don't think I ever can," Freddie said weakly. "I-I never even thought something like this would ever happen to us. And then it did…right out of the blue. I didn't even get a warning. I didn't even get to say goodbye to her…The last thing I said to her was to remember to pick up some yogurt while she was getting the eggs."

Spencer squeezed his shoulder. "Nothing will ever make what happened okay…It wasn't fair. And it's going to take a long time for things to get easier, but-but they will. They really will. I know you don't believe that, but you have to, otherwise you're going to make yourself crazy. Besides…you've got four other people relying on you to help _them _get through this too."

"I know," Freddie said heavily. "I know, but…I don't even know how to talk to them. They lost their _mother_. How can I even begin to help them?"

"Just be there for them," Spencer told them. "And let them know that we're all here for them too. Just like we're all here for you."

Freddie sighed and looked out the window, not saying anything.

Spencer slowly got to his feet. "Eat something," he said. "Try to get some sleep, and then…talk to someone. The kids, me, your mom…anyone."

Freddie didn't reply, he just continued to stare out the window at the blue sky, realizing how much it failed in comparison to the once sparking eyes of his wife.

….

Freddie's head twitched as he lay asleep on the recliner later that evening. His dreams filled with the recollections of that day…

_He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket, but he was so intent on getting a very important email sent that he couldn't be bothered to pick it up. Whoever it was would just leave a message._

"_Daddy, your phone's ringing," his thirteen-year old daughter, Ashton, said, as she grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl on the table. _

"_I know…I'm working though, I'll get to it later," Freddie said, not looking up from his laptop. _

_And then he felt his phone go off again, causing him to loose his train of thought on what he was writing. _

_Groaning in frustration, he pulled his phone hastily from his pocket and saw an unfamiliar number flash across his screen. _

"_Hello?" he answered, somewhat grumpily. _

"_Hello, is this Fredward Benson?" a voice on the other end asked. _

"_Yes, this is he," Freddie said, figuring he was in for the usual telemarketer speech. _

"_I'm very sorry to have to inform you of this," the voice said gently. "But I'm calling from the Seattle Medical Center." _

"_What?" Freddie frowned. "Why? What-What's wrong?" _

"_Your wife, Samantha Benson, was just rushed in here," the voice told him, and he felt his blood run cold. "It seems there was a robbery at the bank on Forester Street, and as the burglar was running out of the bank, your wife…your wife was in the wrong place at the wrong time. The burglar fired his gun, intending to shoot a police officer who was chasing after him, but he ended up hitting your wife."_

"_N-No," Freddie said weakly, griping the end of the table. _

"_I'm sorry," the voice said. "But we couldn't save her. She passed away in the ambulance on her way to the hospital." _

_Freddie felt dizzy as he got to his feet. He thought he was going to be sick. _

_He hung up his phone, a blank expression on his face. _

"_Dad," Jason said, walking into the room. "Do you know if we have any of those chips that-"_

"_Jason," Freddie said weakly, fumbling for his car keys in the nearby drawer. "Jason, watch-watch your brother and sisters." _

"_Dad?" Jason frowned. "Where are you going?"_

"_Hey, dad," Emma said, joining the two. "__**Galaxy Wars**__ is on, if you-Dad? What's wrong?" _

_But Freddie didn't answer her as he ran out the door. _

_And then he was at the hospital, where the nurse he had spoken to on the phone tried to calm him down as he angrily yelled that there had to be a mistake; that the phone call he had just received was a joke; that he wanted to see his wife. _

_It took Freddie several moments to get his wish, for the nurse kept insisting that he was in no state for that, but a doctor came over and told her that someone needed to make an ID on the body, so the nurse reluctantly led him down a hall to a window. _

"_Mr. Benson," she said gently. "You don't have to do this now." _

"_It's not her," Freddie said firmly. "It's a mistake." _

_The nurse gave her a sympathetic look as she rapped on the window, getting the attention of another doctor inside the room. She said something to him through the glass, and a moment later he wheeled a metal gurney over to the window with a long white sheet covering something on top of it. _

"_Mr. Benson," the nurse said again. "You can come back…You're in no condition-"_

"_It's not Sam," Freddie said shakily. "It's not my wife." _

_The nurse sighed, and then turned to the doctor on the other side of the window and nodded. _

_Slowly, the doctor pulled back the white sheet, and Freddie's legs gave out as he saw her. _

_The nurse quickly grabbed a nearby chair and helped him into it, signaling for the doctor to cover Sam's body back up. _

"_No!" Freddie sobbed. "No! No! No!" _

He jerked awake suddenly, and just like every night, after he had been woken up by this nightmare, he thought for a wild second that it _was _just a nightmare, and Sam was laying next to him, fast asleep.

But he wasn't in bed, and Sam wasn't next to him.

He slowly got out of the chair, rubbing his eyes, forcing himself not to look at his and Sam's bed.

He headed over to his doorway, and walked out into the empty hallway. Silence was never something that was common in the Benson household before, but for the past week, it seemed to be the only thing that could be found.

He walked downstairs to the kitchen, where a large plate of sandwiches was sitting out, curtsey of Spencer. But he still had no appetite. He leaned against the island, wondering whether or not the garbage disposal was up for having the numerous casseroles people felt the need to keep brining him dumped down it.

Suddenly he heard footsteps padding down the stairs and Tyler walked into the kitchen. He seemed surprised to see Freddie.

"Hey," Freddie said in a cracked voice.

"I'm hungry," Tyler said in a voice that lacked the usual spark in it. Instead the nine-year old seemed completely out of it.

"Oh, um, here," Freddie said quickly, grabbing a plate from the cabinet and placing one of Spencer's sandwiches on it. "Your Uncle Spencer dropped these off earlier."

"Thanks," Tyler mumbled as he turned to head back upstairs.

"Hey, why don't you eat down-" Freddie began, but just then the doorbell rang for the second time that day, cutting him off.

Praying that it was not another well-wisher here to tell him how sorry they were for his loss, Freddie dragged his feet to the door and opened it, only to find Carly standing on the front porch, holding a large box and bag.

"Oh…hi," Freddie said.

"Hi," Carly said softly, and as she stepped into the light, Freddie noticed that she looked nearly as bad as he knew he did. "I just…I was just doing some cleaning, and um, I found some of…some of Sam's things she had left at my place. Just some purses…shoes…I didn't know if you wanted them, or if I should-"

"I'll take them, thanks," Freddie said, taking the box from her. "I'll just…go through them later. How-How are you?"

Carly shook her head, hugging her arms to her sides tightly. "I still can't believe she's gone…" she whispered. "I-I know we went to her funeral, and we saw…but part of me keeps thinking that she's going to call me up telling me to meet her at the Groovy Smoothie."

Freddie nodded. "I know."

"Oh…Freddie, I-I'm sorry," Carly said. "I-I know this must be harder on you."

"Sam was practically your sister," Freddie mumbled.

"And she was your wife," Carly said gently.

Freddie didn't say anything; he didn't think he could, with the lump that was rising in his throat.

"How are the kids doing?" Carly asked.

Freddie sighed. "Not well…Jason and Emma are both so angry, Ashton can't go more than a minute without crying, and Tyler's really confused about this whole thing."

Carly nodded. "Yeah…I'd expect that. Um, did-did Spencer come by here earlier?"

"Yeah, he did," Freddie said. "Did you send him?"

"No," she replied. "He-He came to see me after he left here. You know, to try and comfort me…I think that's how he's coping with this; he's playing the big brother role for everyone."

"I know," Freddie nodded.

"Anyway, while he was talking to me," Carly said. "He-He mentioned this grief therapist…he told me I should make an appointment there. And I was wondering if maybe you wanted to go see him with you and the kids soon too." She handed him a small business card with the name and number of the therapist. He stuffed it in his pocket.

"Maybe," he mumbled, having no intention of ever seeing this doctor.

"I just thought it would be good for you guys," Carly said softly.

"Thanks," Freddie said quietly.

The two stood in silence for a few minutes.

"Here," Carly finally said, breaking the silence as she handed Freddie the bag in her hand.

"What is this?" Freddie asked.

"It's-It's your anniversary present," Carly told him. "Sam was working on it over at my place…so you wouldn't-so you wouldn't find it and see."

Freddie felt his stomach clench as he remembered what would've been his and Sam's nineteenth anniversary was just a week from that very day. He thought back to the engraved necklace that he had picked out for her that was sitting in his sock drawer.

"I just thought she would've wanted you to have it still," Carly said, a few tears falling from her eyes. "She worked really hard on it."

Freddie put his arms around the girl. "Thank you," he said earnestly.

"You're welcome," Carly sniffed as the two pulled apart. She wiped her eyes. "Um, so I-I need to go now. But call me…if you need to talk. Don't worry about the time."

"You too," Freddie said, offering her a small smile.

"Bye," Carly whispered as she headed out the door.

Freddie sunk down onto the couch and opened the bag and pulled out a large sheet of poster board.

It was a magnificent collage, and Freddie felt a fresh set of tears setting in as he realized how much time Sam must've put into this.

It was their life. In the center of the collage was one of their wedding invitations, surrounded by pictures of them at their wedding; the two of them at the alter, sharing their first dance, Sam smearing cake all over his face. ..

And then there were pictures of their family. Them holding each of their newborn children, a family picture of them all at the beach, all of them laughing on their last vacation to a theme park.

There were even pictures of them dating. He saw images of them at their senior prom, graduation, college, doing iCarly…The ticket stub to the first movie they ever saw together so many years ago was placed right in the middle of a picture of him and her with Ashton after an awards ceremony at her school and the two of them outside the Fat Cake factory.

All around the border of the collage were words that made Freddie feel a familiar warmth as he red them: _Nub, Fregut, Dork, Tech-doof…Baby, lover, husband_…It was every name that she had ever called him.

He flipped the collage over and saw that Sam had written something on the back of it.

_What's up, Frewad, _it read. _Congratulations of surviving nineteen years of being married to me. For some reason I haven't killed you yet, so whatever it is that you're doing, keep it up. Since you're so impossible to buy for, I decided this year to make you your present. And it came out pretty stinkin' awesome. Anyway, since I should probably write something at least a little romantic here, let me get started before I wind up puking all over this thing and I have to start all over…I love you. I know I don't say it every day like you do, but that doesn't mean I don't feel it. I love you so much that I wonder what I would ever do without you. You listen to my rants about pointless things, you always tell me I'm beautiful, even if I look like a mess, you're such an amazing father to our four kids, and you never make me feel like anything less than a princess. I can't believe its already been nineteen years…it seems like just yesterday you and I were in high school, running to Carly to referee our fights; funny how time flies when you're having fun, huh? So happy nineteenth anniversary, Freddie. I can't wait to spend the rest of them with you when we're both old and shriveled sitting on the porch of our retirement home on the beach. I love you more than you will ever know._

Tears fell onto Sam's letter to him.

"We're not gonna grow old together on that beach house, Sam," he whispered, clutching the collage. "We're not going to have any more anniversaries. We're never going to get to do any of the things we planned on…because you're gone. You're gone, baby! You-You're-You're-" he couldn't even finish his sentence as he sobbed.

…

A few hours later, Freddie was back up in his room. He carefully set Sam's collage up on their dresser. It was beautiful. He slowly opened up his sock drawer and pulled out the little box with the necklace in it he had bought for Sam. He took out the silver chain with a small heart on the end of it, which he had specially engraved. He flipped the charm over and read his words: _Sam, you're my everything_.

She still was. No matter what, she still had his heart. He draped the necklace over a corner collage.

Maybe it was the gift, or maybe it was just him, but suddenly, Freddie felt a little stronger. So, taking advantage of this new feeling, he headed back out of his room to do what he knew he should've done a while ago.

He knocked on each of this children's doors.

"Hey," he said as the four of them poked their heads out of their rooms. "Come with me."

He led them back to his room, and then, taking a deep breath, he sat down on his and Sam's bed for the first time since Sam had passed away. He patted the space next to him. "Come on," he said. "Up here."

Jason, Ashton, Emma, and Tyler sat around him, looking up at him.

"Okay," Freddie said heavily. "Here we are. I know I've been pretty out of it lately…I still am. I-I'm still not over this, and I don't think you guys are either-"

"Really?" Emma snapped bitterly.

"We lost your mom," Freddie said softly. "She's gone now…and she's not going to come back."

Ashton looked down at her lap as she began to cry. "Stop saying that," she whispered.

"Sweetie, it's hard-" Freddie began, putting his arm around her.

"We know it's hard!" Jason said loudly. "Telling us that isn't going to make it _stop _being hard! Nothing's going to change what happened, so why can't everyone just leave us alone and stop telling us that!"

"You can't just sit up in your bedroom, locked away," Freddie said patiently.

"_You _have," Jason pointed out vehemently.

"I know I have," Freddie nodded. "Because…Because that was the easiest way I could think to cope with this. I never imagined I would lose your mom this way, you guys. We're all in the same boat here. And we've blocked everything out for long enough."

"But I want mom back," Tyler said weakly.

"We all do," Freddie said. "You're never going to stop missing her. And if life was fair…you would have her here right now. But it isn't…Jason, it's not fair that your mom's not going to get to see you when you get your college acceptance letters. And girls, it's not fair that she won't get to see your first day of high school. And Ty, it's not fair that your mom won't get to see you grow into a teenager. You have every right to be angry and upset and sad about that, but you also have to realize that the horrible feelings you get when you think about that are only going to be a thousand times worse when you isolate yourself. You don't have your mom, but-but I'm here for you. And I know I'm not perfect, but I'm gonna try my best, okay guys? I know there are going to be times when you really need a mother…especially you two, Emma and Ashton, but...we've just got to try and make this work."

Jason looked right at his father. "You'll do it, dad," he whispered.

"Yeah," Emma said shakily. "I know-I know you'll manage."

"We'll help," Ashton added softly. "You don't have to this all yourself, daddy."

Tyler nodded. "We love you, dad."

Freddie smiled as he pulled the four kids into a hug. "You guys have no idea how much I needed to hear that."

And for a few moments, the family sat on the bed, crying, though each feeling as though a weight had been lifted from his or her shoulders as they realized that being surrounded by each other really did help somewhat with the pain.

"Okay," Freddie said, drying his own eyes. "Now, you know if your mom was here…she'd be telling us to stop being a bunch of depressing downers and do something. So here's what we're going to do. We're all going to go downstairs and have ourselves an all-night marathon of Boogie Bear movies and pay-per-view MMA fights while we pig out on pizza and Fat Cakes."

"Sounds like mom's perfect night," Emma said, giving a small smile.

"I know," Freddie nodded. "So you all head down to the living room and start the movies, and I'll be down as soon as I order the pizzas."

The kids nodded as they heaved themselves up off the bed and started downstairs. Freddie picked up Pearphone from the dresser; he hadn't used it since he had gotten that call from the hospital…But as he began to dial the pizza place, he noticed his voicemail icon was blinking. Figuring it was Spencer or someone checking up on him again, he looked at his message log and almost dropped the phone as he saw that the voicemail was dated from a week ago…it was from Sam.

What did he do? Listen to it? Well, the answer to _that _question seemed fairly obvious as he found himself quickly selecting the message and pressing his phone greedily to his ear, desperate to hear his wife's voice.

"Freddie!" he heard Sam say excitedly. "Oh my God! You'll never guess what I just found at the grocery store! You ready for this? Bacon flavored ice cream! It's real! I always thought it was just something Carly would make up whenever she wanted to get me somewhere, but it exists! Oh man, this is, like, the best day ever! There's only a few more tubs of the stuff at the store, so remind me tomorrow to come back here and stock up. Holy chiz…I'm practically crying for joy right now. Hang on, I'm gonna send you a pic, because you need to see this stuff in all its glory, and it will be a good little distraction from all your lame work junk you're doing. Anyway, I'll see you at home, make sure you have my big spoon out and ready for me!"

Freddie slowly pulled the phone away from his ear, Sam's voice still echoing in his head. He quickly saved the message and then went to his inbox where, in fact, an unopened picture message from Sam was waiting for him. He opened it at once and saw his wife grinning ear from ear as she held up a tub of ice cream with a pig on it. He couldn't help but chuckle at how ecstatic she was over something so simple as an ice cream flavor. Her eyes were sparkling and she looked so carefree; this picture perfectly captured the essence of Sam.

Freddie set the picture as his new background, knowing that he'd have to use all his willpower to keep from staring constantly at it.

Taking a deep breath, and one last look at the anniversary collage, Freddie walked out of the room and headed downstairs to his children.


	335. Chapter 335

_Plant_

"Mom," Emma said, walking into the living room where Sam was laying on the couch, watching T.V.

"Yeah?" Sam said, looking up from her show. "What's up, Em?"

"Um, are you busy now?"

"No," Sam replied. "Why?"

"I-I just wanted to know if maybe you wanted to go shopping with me," Emma mumbled.

Sam gave her daughter a strange look. _"You _want _me _to take you shopping?"

"It's just," Emma sighed. "I have my big date with Quincy tomorrow night. You know, for our one-year anniversary."

"Oh yeah, that _is _tomorrow night, isn't it?" Sam said.

"Yeah, and Quincy being the overly-romantic sap he is went and made reservations at some fancy restaurant," Emma said, rolling her eyes. Though Sam could see her eyes sparkling with excitement. "I mean, the place seems lame. The portions are bound to be real tiny and it will probably only be playing classical music, but he's paying, so…"

"Eh, I'm sure it will be better than you think, kid," Sam smiled, turning off the television. She grabbed her purse. "Come on. Let's hit the mall."

…

"What about this one?" Emma said, holding up a dark red dress from the rack of the ninth shop her and Sam had been in.

"That one's nice," Sam said.

"No, it's stupid," Emma sighed, shoving it back on the rack.

"Okay, what about this one?" Sam said, holding up a black dress. "Black goes with everything."

"It's too long," Emma said. "It looks like a prom dress or something."

"You know, you're worse than Ashton right now," Sam said, sitting down on a small stool, massaging her feet.

"Well it's not my fault every dressmaker in America seems to have no clue what they're doing anymore!" Emma moaned. "Nothing here will look good on me."

"Sweetie, you'll look beautiful in anything," Sam said.

"You have to say that, you're my mom!" Emma snapped.

"Come on, what's going on?" Sam said knowingly as Emma slumped against the rack. "You're _never _this picky with clothes."

"I just…I just want to look perfect for Quincy tomorrow night," Emma mumbled.

"You will," Sam assured her.

"No I won't," Emma said miserably. "I'm no good at this stuff."

"At what stuff?" Sam frowned.

"At, you know, being all girly, even for just one night," Emma said. "Look at how much trouble I'm having just finding a dress to wear! If it were Ashton or Clarissa in here, they'd have already found something _perfect _for them to wear, plus matching shoes and accessories."

"Em," Sam said. "You don't need to make yourself girly just because it's your anniversary."

"But Quincy went to all the trouble to get those reservations, and who knows what else he's gonna pull," Emma sighed. "I just want to at least look good for him."

"Emma," Sam said gently. "You and Quincy have been together for an entire year. He loves you, sweetheart. He's going to think you look stunning no matter what. You don't need to stress yourself out over it."

"You really think that Quincy will think I look good in anything?" Emma said.

"Definitely," Sam smiled. "Come on, kid. You got this."

"Well…I do rock blue pretty well. I guess I can probably find a decent looking dress in that color quickly," Emma grinned. "We've been at this stupid mall for three hours already! I'm ready to make a stop at the food court and then go home."

"That's my girl!" Sam said, high fiving her daughter. "There's some blue dresses over there."

"Hey mom?" Emma said as they began going through the dresses. "Were you this cool when you and dad had your first anniversary together?"

"Pfft, no way," Sam chuckled. "Me and your Aunt Carly spent the entire week before our anniversary searching for the perfect dress, and then the day of our date, we spent the entire time doing my hair and make-up." She shivered. "It was the most irritating experience of my life. Plus the whole time I was freaking out, wondering if your dad would like my dress, of if he would think my perfume was weird. I was a nervous wreck, just like you."

"Well did your date turn out okay, at least?"

"Well let's see," Sam said. "The second the two of us stepped outside, it began to pour, and my hair and make-up got completely ruined, and we had to run back inside because your crazy grandma called your dad from work and told him that if he took her car out in that weather she would take away even more of his T.V. channels. So basically we spent the entire night in his apartment watching movies and eating take-out. And you know what? It was perfect. Plus, your dad told me that even with my make-up all washed away and my hair drenched, he still thought I was the most breathtaking girl he could imagine…he was still an overly-cheesy nub back then, too."

….

"Can't I just add one more coat of lip-gloss?" Ashton pleaded.

"No! Get that gunk away from me!" Emma snapped.

"Well can we just add a few curls or something to your hair?" Clarissa asked, holding up a curling iron.

"You touch me with that thing and I'll scream," Emma said, adjusting the straps of her new dress. "Do I look alright though?"

Ashton and Clarissa nodded.

"Yeah," Ashton smiled at her twin. "You look really pretty."

"Quincy's gonna love you in that dress," Clarissa agreed.

"What time are you are gonna be home from your date?" Ashton asked.

"Mom and dad said I could stay out until one," Emma replied.

"Well we'll wait up for you," Clarissa said. "Because we want to hear _everything_.

Emma grinned and rolled her eyes. "If you insist…"

…..

"I brought my video camera!" Gibby announced as he hurried into the Benson's house.

"Why?" Sam frowned, looking up from the video game she was playing with Tyler.

"Um, to capture this beautiful moment on film, duh," Gibby said. He turned to Freddie, who had been typing on his Pearbook next to Sam. "Can you believe our kids have been together for an entire year? How cool is that?"

"Yeah, it's real cool," Freddie said. "But hey? Where's Quincy? You know, the kid who's supposed to actually be _going _on this date tonight."

"What are you talking about, he's right-?" Gibby frowned looking over his shoulder. "Huh. Thought he was right behind me." He poked his head out the front door. "Hey Quincy! Hurry up!" He turned back to Sam and Freddie. "I even leant him my special date night tux."

"More like forced me into it," Quincy mumbled, dragging his feet into the house.

Tyler burst out laughing, and Sam quickly elbowed him, though trying hard to hold back her own laughs.

Quincy was wearing a full corduroy suit that was at least two sizes too big on him.

"Okay, now where's Emma?" Gibby said, turning on his camera. "I need to get pictures for my blog and-dang it! My battery just died. Good thing I have a spare in the car; be back in a flash!"

The second his father left, Quincy turned to Freddie. "Do you _please _have anything for me to wear tonight that's a little less…you know?"

"Yeah," Freddie smiled, getting to his feet. "Come on, I'll get you one of my normal suits."

"Thank you," Quincy said, breathing a sigh of relief as he followed Freddie upstairs.

"So, what do you two have planned for tonight?" Freddie asked as he led the teenager into his room.

"Um, well, the usual dinner and a movie," Quincy replied, fidgeting with his hands as Freddie looked through his closet. "And then we're going to this little botanical garden, because Emma said she really likes looking at all the plants there, and then I thought the two of us could go out for desert or something."

"Sounds like a nice night," Freddie said, handing him one of his suits. "You nervous, though?"

"A little…it's sort of an important date."

"You'll be fine," Freddie assured him. "Just, you know, burn that suit so your dad can't force you into next time."

…

"You _changed_?" Gibby exclaimed as Freddie and Quincy came back downstairs.

"Um, I just remembered the restaurant we're going to has a strict no corduroy policy," Quincy said quickly.

"I think the entire country has that policy," Sam mumbled.

"Is Emma ready?" Freddie asked.

"I just went up there, she said she'll be down in a sec," Sam replied.

Right on cue, they heard footsteps on the stairs, and Emma came down.

Sam and Freddie looked at their daughter, who looked so beautiful and so grown up. And then they looked over at Quincy, who was staring at her, absolutely enamored.

"Wow," Quincy whispered as Emma approached him. "You look…you look…wow."

"Is that your only adjective tonight?" Emma smiled.

"I just mean, you look so…perfect," Quincy told her.

"Oh, well, um, thanks," Emma blushed. "You look nice too, I guess. Hey, wait. Is that my dad's suit?"


	336. Chapter 336

_Excess_

"Freddie! Freddie, you will not _believe _this!" Sam said, rushing over to her boyfriend, who was standing by his locker, playing on his Pearphone.

"What won't I believe?" he asked, putting his phone back in his pocket.

"Okay, so you know how we were at the mall the other day and we passed that comic book store and you saw that authentic replica of some _Galaxy War _thing?"

"You mean the Gold Phaser of Gorwanda?" Freddie said. "The phaser that led to the downfall of the once mighty society of Nug Nug's people?"

"Um, sure…" Sam nodded. "Anyway, you know how you _really _wanted it, but it cost five hundred bucks?"

"Yeah," Freddie sighed sadly. "Too bad I just spent all my money on that new hard drive for my laptop, or else I could have owned one of the greatest items in the entire world."

"Well…" Sam grinned, unzipping her backpack. "You still can, baby!" She pulled out the phaser they had seen at the mall and handed it to him.

"Oh my-What the-Sam!" Freddie exclaimed. "You _got _methis?"

"Uh-huh," she said proudly. "You like it?"

"_Like _it?" Freddie scoffed. "Sam, this is probably the best gift I've ever gotten from anybody. I _love _it, thank you. But…wait. How did you manage to get the five hundred bucks for it?"

"Eh, don't worry about it," Sam said quickly as the bell rang. "Crab…I have to go give an oral presentation in history about some war I know nothing about. I'll see you at lunch though, okay?"

"Um, yeah," Freddie nodded, leaning down to give her a quick kiss. "And baby, thanks again for this. It's really…you're unbelievable, you know that?"

"I know," Sam smirked playfully.

…

"Oh man, can I-can I just _touch _it?" Spencer asked as Freddie showed him the phaser Sam had given him after school in the Shay's apartment.

"Have you washed your hands in the last ten minutes?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah, yeah, of course," Spencer nodded.

"Then yes…but gently!"

Spencer slowly placed his index finger on the phaser, and then immediately snatched it off. "I touched it! I touched it!"

"Isn't it a rush?" Freddie grinned.

"Um, if you two are done with your little nerd session over there…" Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Can one of you help me finish painting this mold of Gibby's foot for iCarly tonight?"

"Oh, right," Freddie said, gently placing his phaser down on the coffee table.

"I can't believe Sam's encouraging your nerdiness by buying you that stuff," Carly chuckled, handing Freddie a paintbrush.

"Um, there's nothing nerdy about the Gold Phaser of Gorwanda," Spencer said, sitting down at the kitchen counter to go on the computer.

"Yeah, and that baby cost _five hundred _dollars," Freddie added. "It's a real collector's item."

Carly nearly spilled the purple paint bottle she had on the table. "Five hundred dollars? For _that_? Where did Sam even _get _five hundred dollars from?"

"You know, I was wondering that too," Freddie said. "But her mom's probably dating another really rich dude this week and weaseled the money out of him."

"And yet she can't weasel out the forty bucks she owes me," Carly sighed, shaking her head. "Oh, and Spencer? Did you pick up the pillows like I asked? We need those for tonight too."

"I tried," Spencer said, as Carly and Freddie finished painting the foot. "But I couldn't get down to Bed Bath and Bewilderment at the mall."

"How come?" Freddie frowned as him and Carly wiped the excess paint from their hands.

"There was a bunch of cops around that part of the mall, and I may or may not have been eating an illegal Canadian Fat Cake," Spencer mumbled.

"Why were there cops at the mall?" Carly asked.

"Oh, apparently the comic book store got robbed," Spencer replied.

"The comic book store?" Freddie repeated slowly.

"Yeah," Spencer nodded. "The owner was really freaking out; he kept yelling that some big ticket item had been taken."

"Aw, that's too bad," Carly said. "Well, I guess we can always just use some of those old pillows from our storage unit. Freddie? Can you help me bring them up? Freddie?"

She looked over at her friend, who was suddenly staring over at his phaser with an odd expression on his face.

"Dude? What's wrong?" Carly asked.

"That phaser…" Freddie said cautiously. "Came from that comic book store at the mall."

"So?" Carly shrugged. "What's that got to do with anything?"

"Spencer?" Freddie said quickly. "Do-Do you happen to know when the store was robbed?"

"I think I heard the police saying late last night," Spencer told him.

"Oh no," Freddie mumbled.

"What?" Carly asked again. "Why are you-oh no."

"Uh-huh," Freddie nodded weakly.

"You guys, you know I hate being out of the loop!" Spencer exclaimed. "What's going on? What's happening? Why are we all nodding?"

"Spencer, think about it…" Freddie sighed. "Sam gives me this insanely expensive phaser, when she can barely afford to pay her cell phone bill every month, and the next day we find out the store where it came from has been _robbed_?"

"Wait," Spencer frowned. "You-You're not saying that you think Sam _stole _that phaser for you?"

"Yeah, she wouldn't do that," Carly said, though there was some hesitation in her voice. "It-it's just a coincidence. It's probably like you said before, Freddie. Her mom's probably just dating some rich dude this week and that's where she got the five hundred bucks. And you know what? Just so we can all get past this…"

She pulled out her Pearphone and dialed Sam's number, putting it on speaker so Spencer and Freddie could hear too.

"Hey, Carls," Sam said, answering.

"Hi Sam," Carly said. "You out of detention yet?"

"Yeah, I'm leaving the school now," Sam replied. "I'm pretty hungry, though. You wanna meet up and grab something to eat?"

"Um, no thanks, I'm good," Carly said quickly. "Hey Sam? Quick question."

"Shoot," Sam said.

"How's your mom's love life?"

"Er…what?"

"You know…is she dating anyone right now?"

"Yeah, she's been seeing some guy for over a month now, actually," Sam said. "Why?"

"Oh, just wondering," Carly said. "So…is he a nice guy? Does he, um, have a well-respected job?"

"Pfft, no, that guy works at the Burger Barn scraping gum from the pavement outside it," Sam said. "I keep trying to tell my mom he's mooching off her, which is pathetic all on its own, but she won't listen to me. But it's fine, the guy manages to bring home free burgers every once in awhile."

"Oh…" Carly frowned. "Well, that-that's nice. I'll see you later then. Bye!"

"So…I'm guessing she didn't get the money from her mom's boyfriend," Freddie sighed. "That doesn't mean she stole the phaser," Carly said.

"How else would she have gotten it, Carly?" Freddie moaned.

"Maybe, she, um…found it on the street?" Spencer suggested.

"Dude," Freddie said, giving him a look.

"But…Sam's never stolen something this valuable before," Carly said. "And she's been really good about staying out of trouble with the law lately…But I guess-I guess maybe when she saw that phaser, and knew that you _really _wanted it, she just sort of…broke down."

"Oh man, this is all my fault," Freddie said. "I should've never pointed this stupid phaser out to her yesterday! Then she never would've seen it. Now my girlfriend's going to wind up going to jail for penny theft!"

"Technically, it's not penny theft, because the item that was stolen cost more than a hundred dollars," Spencer spoke up.

Carly and Freddie gave him a strange look.

"Well those three days at law school weren't a _complete _waste," Spencer defended.

"We can't let Sam go to jail," Carly said firmly, turning back to Freddie.

"I know!" Freddie nodded. "But what are we going to do? If the mall's swarming with cops they're probably really determined to find the phaser. Oh! I bet there's video cameras or something that caught Sam red handed taking it!"

"I got it!" Carly said. "You and I will go to the mall, sneak into that comic book store and then we'll just put the phaser back. The owner will think it was there all along and the cops won't be looking to arrest anyone!"

"Brilliant!" Freddie exclaimed, hurrying to grab the phaser from the coffee table. "Come on, let's hurry up and get to the mall."

"Okay, we'll be back in a little bit, Spencer!" Carly called, pulling on her jacket as her and Freddie rushed out the door.

…

"Alright," Freddie said as him and Carly walked through the mall. "Here's what we'll do. You go into the store, start chatting up the owner about his comic books, and I'll slip into the back and leave the phaser there for him to find."

"I don't know anything about comic books, though!" Carly pointed out. "So how about you talk to the owner and I'll-Aw man!"

The two had just reached the store, but the doors were locked, and there was a sign in the window that read: _Closed as a result of robbery. _

"Well that's just great!" Freddie frowned. "How are we supposed to-"

"Hey you kids! Get away from my shop!" a man yelled loudly, poking his head out the door.

"Oh, we-we're sorry," Carly said. "We were just, um, admiring your window display."

"Well let's just hope that doesn't get robbed too!" the man snapped. "I'm still in a state of shock!"

"Yeah, um, we heard about that," Freddie said. "And we're _real _sorry for your loss. But maybe, um, you weren't really robbed! Maybe what you're missing is just, you know, lost somewhere in the store. My friend and I would be happy to-"

"I've looked through this store hundreds of times already today trying to find my priceless mint-condition _Uranium Man _comic!" the man sobbed. "And it's gone! It's been forked and I'll never get it back!"

"Well maybe if you looked a little harder, you'd-wait," Freddie frowned. "Did-Did you say a _comic _was stolen?"

"Don't make me repeat it!" the man wailed.

"So…you're not missing anything else?" Carly asked.

"Yeah, you're not missing your Gold Phaser of Gorwanda replica?" Freddie asked.

"What? That thing? No, I sold that yesterday," the man said dismissively.

"Oh…" Freddie said, confused. "Well then, um…good day, sir."

"So Sam didn't rob this place then," Carly said as the man retreated back into his store.

"Yeah," Freddie said slowly, pulling the phaser out of his pocket, examining it. "But then _how'd _Sam manage to get it for me?"

"I don't know," Carly said. "Maybe tonight, after iCarly, I can talk to her, and maybe she'll let something slip that will let us know if-"

"Carly? Freddie?"

The two spun around to see Sam approaching them, a corn dog in her hand.

"Sam!" Carly said, plastering a smile on her face. "Sam, what-what are you doing here?"

"I told you, I was hungry after detention let out, so I came here for a snack," Sam replied. "What are you guys doing here?"

"Oh you know, just-just some shopping," Freddie said, quickly trying to jam his phaser back in his pocket.

"What's that?" Sam frowned, spotting Freddie's attempt.

"Nothing," Freddie said, trying to act natural. "Hey, you wanna go get a churro? I'm in the mood for a churro. So let's all get-"

"Is that the phaser thing I bought you?" Sam frowned.

"Um…maybe?"

"Well, why would you bring it to the mall?" Sam asked. "You said yourself when you saw it the other day that it's really valuable and should be used for display only."

"He-He just wanted to take if for a walk before he put it on his special _Galaxy Wars _shelf," Carly told her.

"Why would you take it for a walk?" Sam asked. "That doesn't-" Then she looked over at the comic book store, which she just realized they were standing in front of. "Were-Were you trying to take it back?" she questioned, her face falling. "Don't you like it?"

"I do!" Freddie said quickly. "I love it! But, um, Sam, I-I was just sort of wondering-"

"Wondering what?" Sam asked.

But then she caught sight of the robbery sign on the door. She looked over at Carly and Freddie.

"Do-Do you guys think…do you guys think I _stole _that phaser?" she asked softly.

"Well, we-we just-" Carly began.

Sam shook her head, and Freddie felt horrible as he saw the hurt flooding her eyes. "I didn't steal it," she mumbled. She spun around and stormed off.

"Sam!" Freddie called after her. "Sam!"

…..

"She's never going to speak to me again," Freddie said miserably as him and Carly walked up to Sam's front door. "I accused my girlfriend of being a thief…what kind of guy am I?"

"Well I accused my best friend, so we're in the same boat," Carly told him.

"I can't believe this," Freddie sighed as he rang Sam's doorbell. "My girlfriend gets me a five hundred dollar gift, and instead of being grateful, I'm suspicious!"

"Look, we're going to apologize to Sam, and tell her that we should've never thought she would do something like that," Carly said, ringing the doorbell again.

"Why isn't she answering?" Freddie asked. He knocked hard on the door. "Sam! Sam, come on, baby, open up!"

"Here, I think I have a spare key for her place in here," Carly said, looking through her purse.

"Um, okay…why?"

"I fed Frothy while her and her mom went to divorce party in Wyoming last year," Carly replied, pulling out a key. She unlocked the door.

"Sam?" she called as they walked into the house. "Sam!"

"What do you guys want?" Sam snapped, coming downstairs. "You want to look through my room and see if you think anything in there's stolen?"

"No, Sam, we came to apologize," Carly said.

"Yeah, Sam, we are _so _sorry we thought that you robbed that store," Freddie said, climbing up the stairs to meet his girlfriend. "We-We knew that you wouldn't do that, but when we heard that the store had been robbed and something valuable had been stolen last night, we-we just thought it was odd and overreacted."

"Yeah, we just didn't want you to go back to jail over this," Carly nodded. "I mean, you're my best friend and Freddie's girlfriend, and you just turned eighteen last month, so you would be sentenced as an adult…we just wanted to return the phaser so you wouldn't get in trouble. But we should've come right to you and asked you about it."

"Yeah, no chiz!" Sam said, crossing her arms.

"Look, we're going to make this up to you," Freddie told her.

"Yeah, we will," Carly said firmly.

Sam sighed. "Why'd you even think I robbed the place to begin with?"

"Because, that phaser cost five hundred dollars," Freddie said. "I mean, Sam…baby. How-How'd you manage to get that kind of money?"

"Why does that matter?" Sam mumbled. "The point is I got it, _legally_, because I _wanted _to give my boyfriend something he'd really like."

"Okay," Freddie said. "Okay, I-that's fine. I won't ask you how you got this anymore."

"Thank you," Sam said.

"So…are we good?" Freddie asked.

Sam gave him a small smile. "Maybe after a bucket of fried chicken."

"Fair enough," Freddie grinned, leaning down to give her a kiss. "And Sam, I really do appreciate you getting that phaser for me. It means a lot."

"You buy me chiz all the time," Sam mumbled. "And speaking of you buying me chiz, that fried chicken isn't going to pick itself up."

"Okay, I'll be back," Freddie told her, heading back down to the front door.

"Sam?" Carly said as Freddie left. "Are _we_ good?"

"Carly…come on," Sam said. "You're my best friend. You know I can't stay mad at you."

"Still, I feel really bad," Carly said. "But, um, Sam? Can't you just tell _me _how you got half a thousand dollars for that phaser for Freddie?"

Sam sighed. "Okay…but you can't tell him, okay? Otherwise he'd freak out."

"Deal," Carly nodded.

"Okay, well…you know that one-of-a-kind Fat Cake wrapper I have from the first one ever made?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, the one you won in that sweepstakes," Carly nodded. "You must've sent in a million box tops for that."

"I did," Sam said. "And it turns out that baby's pretty valuable. I sold it at that new pawn shop that just opened up and got the five hundred dollars from that."

"Are-are you serious?" Carly exclaimed. "Sam! You _loved _that thing! You said it was your most prized possession!"

"Yeah, well…Freddie really loved that phaser," Sam shrugged.


	337. Chapter 337

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 324, where the girls want Freddie to tell them who the better kisser is, and he winds up being saved by Spencer before he has to answer.**

_Waffle_

"Man, what a great day of savings!" Spencer said happily as him and Freddie returned to the Shay's apartment. "We got two sponge mops for the price of one, forty percent off a roll of Velcro and enough waffle irons to last a lifetime."

"Yeah, it was a real, er, blast," Freddie yawned. "Thanks again for saving me back there…I can't believe those two expected me to tell them who I thought the better kisser was."

"Girls can be crazy sometimes," Spencer said, fumbling for his keys.

"Tell me about it," Freddie said as Spencer unlocked the door. "Anyway, I'm just gonna grab my Pearpad that I left in there, and then I think I'm just gonna-ah!"

When Spencer swung open the door, they were greeted by Carly and Sam, who were standing right at the entranceway.

"Were you waiting here for us?" Spencer frowned.

"No, genius, you guys were practically screaming outside the door," Sam said. "It's not made of stone, you know."

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "And we still need to talk to Freddie about a certain question he has yet to answer."

"Well, have fun with that!" Spencer said, turning to head back out the door.

"Dude!" Freddie hissed. "You're going to abandon me?"

"Hey, I saved you once," Spencer pointed out. "You're on your own now."

"But-Come back!" Freddie yelled as Spencer hurried out. "Aw man."

"Freddie, come on," Carly said. "All you have to do is tell us who you think kisses better. Me, or Sam. Sam and I already agreed that we won't get mad at you over the results, so why are you being such a baby?"

"You guys, this is completely unfair," Freddie moaned.

"Just tell us who kisses better already so we can get this over with," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I'm sick of hearing this one go on and on about it."

"Not happening," Freddie said firmly.

"Okay," Carly said simply. "Then I guess you don't want to hear the little deal Sam and I worked out for you…"

"No, I-little deal?" Freddie frowned.

"Yup," Carly smiled. She pulled out two sheets of paper from her pocket. "While you were off hiding with Spencer, Sam and I decided to rate all of the guys we've kissed from best to worst…aren't you just a tiny bit curious to see where you fall on each of our lists?"

Freddie stared at the two pieces of paper in Carly's hand. She did have a point…he did sort of want to know what each of them thought of _his _lip work. But was it worth it?

Freddie let out a sigh of defeat. "Are you going to let me rest if I keep on refusing to tell you?"

"No, probably not," Carly said.

"And…you both totally promise that there will be no hard feelings or _kicking _me?"

"We promise," Carly nodded.  
"And you'll really let me see your lists after I tell you?" Freddie asked.

"That's the deal."

"Well then…fine," Freddie conceded. "I'll tell you guys."

"Whoa, you're going to cave just like that?" Sam exclaimed.

"Sam!" Carly snapped. "What are you doing?"

"Well I just think the nub should have more of a backbone, that's all," Sam mumbled.

"You said you were fine with the list plan!"

"Yeah, when I thought it wouldn't-Ugh, never mind. Just spit it out, Fredbat, I don't have all day," Sam said.

"Okay," Freddie said, taking a deep breath. "Of the two of you, I-I personally think that the better kisser is…" He took one last quick glance at Carly and Sam before diverting his gaze down to his sneakers. "Sam."

Sam looked quite surprised, but she didn't say anything.

"Alright," Carly said. "_Thank _you. See? No hurt feelings, no inappropriate kicking. It was no big deal."

"Yeah, yeah," Freddie said, his face still red. "Now it's your turn. Let me see the lists."

"Here you go," Carly said, handing him the sheets of paper.

"Is this really necessary?" Sam asked.

"A deal's a deal," Freddie smirked.

"Yeah, Freddie was mature enough to tell us who he thought was the better kisser, we can show our lists," Carly said to her best friend. She turned back to Freddie. "Okay, the one on top is mine."

Freddie unfolded Carly's list and saw that there was no less than twelve names on it.

"Wow, Carly," Freddie chuckled.

"Stop," Carly said, blushing slightly. "It's not that bad. Besides, it's really not that many."

"So I can tell Spencer how many guys you've kissed than?" Sam grinned.

"Oh God, no," Carly said.

Freddie rolled his eyes as he looked for his name. "Okay," he said, scanning the list. "Out of the twelve guys you've kissed, I'm number…seven?"

"Who's on top?" Sam asked.

"Kyle," Carly told her. "You know, that brainy guy. He might have been unnaturally smart, but that boy sure could kiss…"

"How lovely," Freddie said, putting aside Carly's list. He began to unfold Sam's.

"Alright, before you read that, you should just keep in mind that I haven't kissed as many dudes as Ms. Sugar Lips over here," Sam said. "So don't freak out or anything about-"

"I'm number one?" Freddie said, a cocky grin beginning to creep onto his face.

"You rated him as the best guy you've kissed?" Carly asked.

"Well, I-I _said _I didn't have as many dudes as you to compare him to," Sam defended, though her face was now more red than Freddie's or Sam's had been. "See, there's only three guys on that list. So really, it's not big of an honor. So get over yourself, Fredbush."

"But still, he's ahead of Pete," Carly said, looking over Freddie's shoulder at Sam's list. "And-Wait, who's Philip Porter?"

"Some guy I met at the butcher's shop," Sam shrugged. "We started talking while I was waiting for my ham, he told me I was pretty, and then he just sort of kissed me…He asked me if I wanted to go out some time, but he had this weird eye twitch thing going on, so I passed. Plus he was a pretty awful kisser."

"Ah," Carly nodded understandingly. "Well then, Freddie, there you go. You told us who was the better kisser, and we told you what we thought of your kissing…I'd say this was a pretty productive day, wouldn't you say?"

"Sure," Freddie shrugged. "I guess."

"And wouldn't you say it was a productive day, Sam?" Carly asked. "I mean, you told Freddie he was the best guy you've ever kissed and Freddie said that he thought you were the better kisser…"

"Okay?" Sam frowned, giving Carly a strange look.

"Yup," Carly said, looking back and forth between her two best friends. "Pretty interesting stuff…anything either one of you would like to say about the fact that both of you seem to be so…_fond_ of each other's lips?"

"What are you talking about?" Freddie asked, giving her a confused look.

"Yeah, you're being all weird," Sam nodded.

"Ugh!" Carly groaned, throwing her hands up in the air in frustration. "Unbelievable! You two just can't-Man!"

She stormed upstairs, mumbling something about her best friend's being 'impossible to work with'.

"What's her deal?" Freddie asked.

"No clue," Sam shrugged.


	338. Chapter 338

**AN-So this oneshot is about Sam falling in love with Freddie. It takes someplace within the fourth season. Hope you enjoy it!**

…**.**

_Conversion_

"Seriously, how great is my new room?" Carly said, looking around the eighty-two thousand dollar bedroom that Spencer had given her just a few weeks ago. "You'd have thought the thrill of it would've worn off by now, but it's still here."

"Well I'd be all happy and smiley if my brother made me the best room in the history of rooms too," Sam grinned from the ice cream sandwich love seat she was lounging on.

"Hey," Freddie said, walking into Carly's bedroom with his large Pearpad.

"Hey," Carly smiled back.

"Fredwardo," Sam said, sitting up.

"You guys should see this really funny video these guys just sent into iCarly," Freddie said, beginning to pull something up on his Pearpad. "It's _hilarious_."

As Freddie worked on his Pearpad, Sam frowned. Something seemed different about the tech nub…but she couldn't put a finger on what exactly it was. This had been bothering her for the past week; it seemed that every time she saw him, there was some sort of…aura around him that seemed to draw her attention to him.

She gave a small shrug and then went back to the bag of potato chips she had been eating. She was sure it was nothing; his mom was probably spraying him with a new tick spray or something that gave him a new scent that she was picking up on.

"Here, come look," Freddie said, sitting down on the edge of Carly's bed. "It's two guys freestyle wrapping the lines of the opening scene in _Galaxy Wars_."

The girls sat down on either side of Freddie, watching his Pearpad.

This video had to be the stupidest thing Sam had ever seen in her life. She knew she wasn't the biggest fan of _Galaxy Wars _around, but still, this was ridiculous! She could tell by the look on Carly's face that she didn't get the point of this video either, but Freddie was laughing as though it was the funniest thing around.

And then, for some strange reason that she couldn't even begin to explain, Sam found herself laughing as well.

"It's really funny, right?" Freddie grinned as the video ended.

"Um, y-yeah," Sam nodded.

_No! _she thought to herself, though. _That was the biggest waste of three minutes I've ever seen. What's wrong with me? Why am I not insulting the nub's sense of humor?_

"You guys really liked it?" Carly frowned, looking at Sam suspiciously.

"Well I just thought that it would be cool to show on iCarly next week, since we still need one more video," Freddie shrugged. "Why? Did you not like it?"

"Well…it's not that I didn't _like _it," Carly said slowly. "It's just that I think that the fans of iCarly who aren't into _Galaxy Wars _wouldn't get it."

"Oh," Freddie said, looking a bit disappointed.

"Well…maybe we can still put it up on iCarly, you know, just under our random clips section," Sam suggested.

_What the heck? _Sam thought. _Why am I suggesting something that would make this nub feel better?_

"Yeah, that could be cool," Freddie said, smiling at Sam, who instantly felt like smiling back at him, though she managed to hold that in.

"That sounds good," Carly said. "But we still need to find one more video for our show then."

"Well," Freddie sighed, getting to his feet. "Looks like we have a long day of looking at videos ahead of us then…I'm gonna go get something to eat. Is there anymore of those popcorn balls Spencer made?"  
"Just one," Carly said. "But Sam's already called it."

"Um…actually I just remembered that I have a bag of pork rinds in my backpack," Sam said, reaching for her backpack that was lying on Carly's bed and pulling out the pork rinds. "I traded my shoelaces for them with some dude at the park, and you know Mama would rather have a good old fashioned deep fried snack than some little popcorn ball, so if he wants it…"

"Alright, cool," Freddie shrugged, heading out of the room.

"Sam and I will try and figure out how to get that _Galaxy Wars _video up on the clips section," Carly said, opening up her Pearbook. "Since you two liked it so much…Sam? You know how to do this? Sam?"

"Huh?" Sam said, snapping out of her thoughts. "Oh, yeah. I think so. Give it to me."

As she began to load the video (which she still thought was incredibly lame), she tried to wrap her head around what had just happened. Did she actually _willingly _give up food to Freddie? She had been thinking of eating that popcorn ball all day!

_What is wrong with me_? Sam thought, shaking her head. _Maybe I'm coming down with something._

…..

"So these coffee beans are really from Brazil?" Carly asked as Spencer set a tray of coffee mugs down on the coffee table for the three teens to try.

"Yeah, I bought them from this Sunshine Scout a few floors below us," Spencer nodded.

"Hot mom?" Freddie asked knowingly.

"_Insanely _hot," Spencer grinned.

"I didn't know the Sunshine Scouts sold coffee beans," Carly said as she took a sip from her mug. "Hey, it's pretty good."

"Yeah," Sam agreed, sipping her beverage as well. "Really good."

"Mine needs a little bit of sugar," Freddie said, pursing his lips.

"Wuss!" Spencer said loudly as Freddie got up and headed into the kitchen.

Sam turned her head, trying to watch him while at the same time not making it obvious that she was watching him…

It had been over a month since these weird feelings had started, and she still had no clue what was up! It was as though she had to _force _occasional insults out at Freddie and fight off the urges to actually compliment the nub and just sit around gawking at him.

For a few crazy days, Sam thought maybe she was having trouble being so mean to Freddie was because she was _maturing_. Carly had always told her that someday she would have to grow up and stop pranking everyone and causing them physical and emotional pain. But then she realized she wasn't having any problems once so ever abusing Gibby. Or any other loser that got on her nerves at school; it was just Freddie she was having difficulty with.

_Maybe I owe him something…_Sam thought, quickly diverting her gaze from Freddie, who was now coming back to the sofa with a sugar bowl. _Yeah, maybe that's what's been bugging me. I'm in the nub's debt, so I can't just pick on him like I usually do…but what do I owe him?_

"Sam?" Carly said. "Did you hear me?"

"Huh?" Sam said quickly, snapping out of her daze. "What'd you say?"

"I asked you if you were still spending the night here," Carly repeated.

"Oh yeah…sure," Sam nodded.

"Well you two will have the apartment to yourselves," Spencer said. "Right Fredo?"

"Oh yeah!" Freddie said. "I almost forgot; we're camping out at the ticket office to get front row tickets to that fencing expedition that's coming to Seattle."

"Is it really necessary to camp out?" Carly frowned. "I mean, are that many people _really _going to see that?"

"Um, Seattle _happens _to be on of the hottest fencing spots in the nation," Spencer defended.

"Okay," Carly chuckled, rolling her eyes.

"Yeah, dudes jabbing each other with swords…doesn't sound totally pathetic," Sam shrugged.

_Oh my God, what's happening to me?_

"Whatever," Carly shrugged. "You two have fun standing outside in the freezing cold. Sam and I will be here drinking hot chocolate and pigging out on junk food."

…..

Later that evening, Carly and Sam were sitting on beanbag chairs in the iCarly studio, painting their toenails.

"You know, I really like this shade of pink," Carly commented, wiggling her toes a little bit. "It's not too vibrant, but it's also fun. It's sophisticated, yet flirty at the same time."

"It's a color, Carls," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Pink is pink."

"Now I just have to do my fingernails," Carly said, ignoring her best friend's comment. "Hey, do you think I should try out that French manicure set my dad sent me?"

"I thought you said you were going to save that for a fancy occasion," Sam pointed out.

"I am," Carly said, smiling.

"Okay, Carls, who is he?" Sam sighed knowingly.

"You know that new guy in our Physics class who just transferred from Briarwood?"

"Vince? Sure," she nodded. "Wait, you like _him_?"

"I think so," Carly said. "I mean, he's _so _cute. Plus the few times I've talked to him I've gotten that whole butterflies-in-the-stomach feeling, and I just want to sit around complimenting him. And the other day, during that momentum lab, I kept laughing at all his stupid jokes, even though I thought they were lame; I just couldn't help myself!"

_Weird feelings, need to compliment, laughing at stupid things…_Sam thought slowly to herself. Weren't those the same exact things that had been happening to _her _whenever Freddie was around lately?

"But, um," Sam said, trying to sound nonchalant. "That-That doesn't necessarily mean you _like _the guy?"

"Sam, those are like, the most obvious signs that you're crushing on a guy," Carly laughed. "Everyone knows that. I mean, why else would I be acting like that?"

"I don't know!" Sam exclaimed, jumping to her feet. "But it doesn't have to mean you're crushing on the nub! Maybe you just drank some bad Peppy Cola or have mental issues or something! It doesn't have to mean you like him!"

"Why'd you just call Vince a nub?" Carly frowned.

"I didn't! I-Ugh!"

"Wait, where are you going?" Carly asked as Sam began to storm out of the studio.

"Bathroom!" Sam snapped.

She stomped downstairs to the bathroom, slamming the door shut behind her. She turned on the faucet and splashed her face with cold water. She looked over at the mirror at her reflection.

"Carly-Carly's wrong," she mumbled to herself.

_But Carly's never wrong about these things,_ she thought to herself.

She slowly lowered herself down to sit on the edge of the bathtub. Carly was having the same feelings she was having whenever Freddie was around, and knew that it meant she liked that Vince kid, so, assuming Carly _was _right about her feelings, that would mean that she…

"No!" Sam gasped. "No, no, no, no!"

There had to be a mistake, this wasn't right, she was wrong!

But it looked like all the signs pointed to one thing; one thing that Sam never could've prepared herself for. She _liked _Fredward Benson.

…..

_I like Freddie_, Sam thought for the millionth time he next day, pacing back and forth in her bedroom. _I like Freddie…_

The more times she went over it, the more it made her feel completely and hopelessly confused.

How could she have fallen for him? She had made it her life's work to torment the boy! She _enjoyed _pranking him and laughing at his misfortunes.

_He __**does **__look sort of cute when he's all peeved off, _Sam found herself thinking.

"Ah! Pull it together, Puckett!" Sam moaned, falling down on her bed.

She felt like she was about to explode…what did she do now? There was _no _way she could even bring up the _idea _of this to Freddie. After everything Sam had put him through over the years, she was sure he'd take it as an opportunity to make her feel just as horrible as she had made him feel with everything she had pulled on him.

She didn't tell Carly the previous night either. Carly was her best friend, but she was also a meddler. If Sam had told her that she actually _liked _Freddie, there was no doubt that within a matter of twenty-four hours that she'd have some overly complicated plot to get her together with him.

But she couldn't keep this bottled up! Who knew how long it would be before she did something drastic like just spinning the dork around one day and kissing him full on the mouth?

Sam found herself smiling as this thought brought back the memory of him and her sitting on his fire escape, their lips pressed together.

_Get it out of your head_, Sam told herself firmly. _Because you __**cannot **__let it happen again!_

Just then, her laptop, which was sitting on her desk, began to beep, and she looked over and saw that she had a web chat request from Melanie.

"Melanie!" Sam said, jumping off her bed. This was perfect! She could talk to Melanie! Under normal circumstances, Sam would be repulsed by this idea. But as much as she hated to admit it, there were times when she _did _need her sister. After all, she had been the one she called right after that fire escape kiss…

She quickly clicked the accept button, and a second later, her sister's identical face appeared on her screen.

"Sam!" Melanie said excitedly. "I'm so glad you finally answered. I can never seem to catch you online."

"Yeah, well…hey," Sam said. "What's up?"

"Oh nothing, I just had some time between my debate team meeting and cheerleading practice, so I thought I'd just see if you wanted to chat," Melanie said brightly. "How's Seattle? Mom doing okay?"

"Yup, she's doing good," Sam nodded. "Actually, she's doing really good. A few weeks ago, Carly forced me and her to go to this therapy session and we actually _talked. _Now she's actually trying to be a parent. Well, trying for her; the woman gave me a roll of toilet paper in my lunch the other day."

"Oh wow, that's so great!" Melanie said. "I'm glad you two are getting along better."

"Yeah it's real nice," Sam said quickly. "But anyway, Mel…there _is _actually something that I want to sort of, you know, _talk _to you about."

"What is it?"

"First swear you won't tell anyone," Sam said.

"Did you do something illegal?" Melanie moaned.

"No! Nothing illegal," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Just swear!"

"Fine, I swear I won't tell anyone," Melanie said. "Now what's up?"

"Well, um…you-you know Freddie, right?"

"You mean the dude who's convinced I don't exist, yeah, I remember him," Melanie smiled.

"Well, um, lately," Sam began. "With him…I-I sort of…kind of…"

"Oh my God! You like him!" Melanie exclaimed.

"What? How'd you know?" Sam frowned.

"Please, I know my sister," Melanie said. "But holy chiz, Sam! This is great. I mean I could totally see it coming, but still, now that you've finally accepted your feelings, you can get moving on them!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Sam said quickly. "No one's moving on any feelings."

"You mean you're not going to talk to Freddie about how you feel about him?" Melanie asked.

"Um, that's _exactly, _what I mean," Sam nodded. "Come on, Melanie, it's Freddie! If I ever told him I kind of like him he wouldn't wait a second before totally throwing it in my face."

"He wouldn't do that," Melanie said.

"You've met the guy once," Sam pointed out.

"Yeah, I know," Melanie said. "And during that one time, when we went out on that date to that little dance club, he sort of seemed to be very determined to prove that I was you."

"Of course he was! He wanted to catch me pranking him!"

"Well, maybe," Melanie shrugged. "Or maybe he just wanted it to _really _be you he was on that date with…"

"You're crazy," Sam said.

"Look, Sam, I know you're not exactly, well, the _best _when it comes to relationships," Melanie sighed. "But I still think you should talk to Freddie; you might be surprised. Oh! I'll send you this link from about making the conversion from friend to something more!"

"No, I don't want any link!" Sam said firmly. "These-These stupid feelings will probably just go away in a few weeks. I can keep my cool for a few weeks."

"I'm still sending you the link," Melanie said, smiling at her sister.

"I know you are," Sam said, shaking her head

"Okay, well I need to go get my pom poms for practice now," Melanie said. "But I'll talk to you again soon. And good luck, Sam."

"Bye," Sam said. She clicked out of the chat window and went back to her bed.

"Yeah…" she said softly to herself. "In a few weeks, I'll be cured of any crush I had on the nub."

…

But unfortunately, Sam was quite wrong. Weeks passed, and then even months, and she still couldn't shake her affection from Freddie.

But talking to Melanie, telling at least _one _person how she was feeling seemed to help her hide her feelings pretty well whenever she was around him. Though there were a few close calls…

She had to use all of her self-control when stupid girls began flocking around Freddie after his little vampire gig on iCarly. And then when she went to Webicon and saw her and Freddie's faces together in those little heart cutouts the fans had, she tried not to make it noticeable how she would smile at them. But she still had to start a huge Creddie uproar among the fans by saying Carly and Freddie were dating so that she wouldn't have to keep denying that she felt any feelings towards him.

But all in all, she thought she kept her emotions hidden very well; that was always the one thing she was good at. She made sure to never compliment him too much and kept the insults coming, and when they hired that brain-dead intern, Court, she did her best to gush over him, even though she secretly wished it was Freddie who she was able to trick so easily into taking off his shirt.

Of course the hardest times for her to contain herself was when Freddie would insist on arm wrestling her.

Sam didn't know _how _he had gotten so strong and muscular, but that boy seemed determined to break the geeky, wimpy AV guy stereotype. Sam knew that she was still stronger than him, and could easily beat him in just under a second, but having him hold her hand like that, seeing his face scrunch up all cute as he used all his strength to try and overpower her…she would find herself allowing him to hold on longer and longer each time before beating him.

"I'm telling you," Sam said, sitting at her desk, talking to Melanie on her webcam. "He still doesn't have a clue. Am I good or what?"

"Sam, its been almost three months," Melanie sighed. "I don't think your feelings for him are going anywhere."

"Well…maybe they just need a little bit more pushing," Sam shrugged.

"Uh-huh," Melanie nodded. "I still say it's only a matter of time before you do something crazy."

"No way, I've got this," Sam said.

"Okay…well what are you doing tonight?"

"Oh, I have to go to the school for this stupid lock-in," Sam replied. "They have it every year so kids can finish up their semester projects."

"Cool," Melanie nodded. "So what are you and Carly working on?"

"Oh, I'm not working with Carly," Sam said. "I'm working with Freddie and the new iCarly intern, Brad."

"Wait, wait, wait," Melanie frowned. "You don't want to tell Freddie how you feel, yet you go and work with him on a school project? Doesn't that seem a little risky?"

"No, for the millionth time, I'm not girly and weak like you," Sam said. "I can be around a guy I like without having to throw my feelings at him. It'll be fine."

Just then she heard her doorbell ring downstairs.

"That's Brad, he's giving me a ride to the lock-in," Sam said. "I'll talk to you later."

"Okay, well, have fun at your lock-in," Melanie said.

"I will," Sam said. "It'll be totally fine, Melanie. You'll see."

…**.**

**AN-I know the official story for when first started to like Freddie is when he fell and hit his head on a fire hydrant. I even actually wrote a oneshot about that too. But I honestly don't buy it. First of all, I don't think Sam would tell Freddie so easily. I feel like she had that answered all prepared for when he did ask. I think that her feelings for Freddie came gradually, as a result of their interactions, like with their kiss in iKiss or the times they would hang out alone without Carly, like in iDate a Bad Boy. That's also why I think she broke down at the lock-in. If she had just started liking Freddie then, she probably would've been able to contain herself during Freddie's little speech. I mean, come on, it's Sam Puckett. But maybe with her keeping her feelings cooped up inside of her too long, coupled with the pressure from Carly **_**and **_**Freddie sitting there telling her to not be afraid of her feelings, she cracked. But anyway, that's just my thoughts. I was actually really excited when I got this request because when exactly Sam fell in love with Freddie has always been something I wondered about. **

**Oh, and also, now that I'm done psychoanalyzing fictional characters…anybody know what show comes from? It's one of my favorites!**


	339. Chapter 339

_Palace_

"Okay, so let me get this straight," Carly frowned, sipping her smoothie at the Groovy Smoothie. "You died your underwear _magenta_…"

"Yeah," Gibby nodded.

"And it…bled onto your skin?" Sam finished.

"_And _through my kakis!" Gibby exclaimed. "Lucky I had this kilt in my locker to wear over the stain." He pulled at the Scottish kilt that he currently had around his waist.

"I'm still not really clear on why you died your underwear in the first place," Carly said.

"Oh, well see," Gibby began. "I was reading this magazine, and-"

"No, no, I didn't ask you to give me _more _details," Carly said quickly.

"Yeah, don't make me puke up the smoothie I just bought," Sam frowned.

"Hey, you guys," Freddie said, walking into the Groovy Smoothie. He gave Sam a quick kiss and sat down next to her. "Sorry I'm late."

"Where were you, baby?" Sam asked.

"Being held up by my mom," Freddie sighed. "She just got this chain email that says denim causes boys to grow faulty facial hair or something, so I had to stop her from throwing away all my jeans and-Gibby? Are you wearing a kilt?"

"Yeah, I died my underwear," Gibby said.

"Uh-huh," Freddie said, giving him a strange look. "Okay, well I'm gonna go get my smoothie. Sam, I know you're probably hungry. Want me to get you some French fries or something?"

"Um, no, no," Sam said quickly. "I'm good."

Carly, Gibby and Freddie all stared at her.

"What?" Sam snapped. "I'm not allowed to be full once in awhile?"

"No, it's just I never thought I'd live to see the day when you were," Freddie chuckled. "Especially when I'm offering to buy the food _for _you."

"Well, my smoothie's enough for right now," Sam mumbled.

"Okay," Freddie shrugged. "I'll be back in a sec."

"You know?" Gibby said, wincing as he shifted in his seat. "I think I might be allergic to the dye…I think I might be getting a rash on my-"

"Gibby!" Sam and Carly yelled.

…

"Ugh, are we done making confetti yet?" Sam moaned, cutting up several pieces of colorful construction paper.

"Just about," Carly said.

"We've been at this for six hours," Freddie said, massaging his scissor hand.

"Yeah, why do we need this much confetti?" Gibby asked.

"Because we need enough to stuff six dozen teddy bears for iCarly tomorrow night," Carly explained, dumping the last of her confetti into the fourth large garbage bag the four teens had filled. "There…I think that's just about it."

"Finally!" Sam exclaimed. "I never want to cut anything again!"

"Hey you guys!" Spencer said brightly, coming into his apartment. "Whoa, what's with the trash bags?"

"They're filled with confetti for a bit we're doing on iCarly," Freddie told him.

"Yeah, we just spent _six hours _cutting construction paper into tiny little pieces," Gibby nodded.

"It was a nightmare," Carly said.

"You guys," Spencer laughed. "Why didn't you just use my confetti maker?"

The four teens looked up at him.

"Confetti maker?" Sam repeated.

"Yeah, that little shredder thing on the bottom shelf over there," Spencer said. "It was a gift from Socko's grandmother. You just stick in the construction paper, press a button, and BAM! You get a pound of confetti in about ten seconds."

"Spencer!" Carly exclaimed. "You _heard _me complaining about having to make all this confetti during breakfast this morning, and you didn't think to tell me about you little confetti maker _then_?"

"I-I thought you knew about it," Spencer said lamely.

"You're lucky I don't put you through it!" Sam snapped.

"Well, that's six hours we're never going to get back," Freddie sighed.

"I could've been trying to solve my rash problem," Gibby mumbled.

"Let's just go get dinner and try to save the rest of this day," Carly said, still glaring at her brother.

"Oh cool, I could go for some food," Spencer said. "Where are were going?"

"_We _are going to Pizza Palace," Carly said. "You can stay here and play with your confetti maker!"

"But I want pizza too," Spencer said sadly as Carly, Sam, Freddie and Gibby stormed out of the apartment. He sighed as they slammed the door shut. "Oh well," he said, picking up his confetti shredder and a leftover sheet of construction paper. He pushed the on button on the shredder and put the paper through it. "Looks like it's just you and me Mr. Confetti Maker. But that's okay, we'll still have a marvelous-Ah!"

The shredder suddenly burst into flames, and Spencer quickly dropped it and put the fire out with the nearby fire extinguisher.

"Well then," he said breathlessly once the flames were gone. "I guess I'm on my own."

…

"Okay, how good is the pizza here?" Freddie grinned, taking a bite of his perfectly seasoned slice.

"Delicious," Sam agreed. "They must use like eight different types of cheese!"

"There aren't even eight types of cheese," Gibby scoffed.

"Are you challenging my cheese knowledge?" Sam frowned, narrowing her eyes.

"Hold on, maybe he's got a point," Carly said. "Let's see, there's mozzarella, cheddar, American…"

"Gouda," Freddie added.

"And Swiss," Sam said.

"That's still not eight," Gibby pointed out.

"Excuse me," Carly said as their waiter appeared at their table. "Do you happen to know how many types of cheese there are?"

"No, but maybe if I did, I'd be making it big on Broadway right now instead of waiting tables in this dump!" he snapped, slamming their bill down on the table.

"Um…okay then," Carly said as their waiter stormed off. She reached for her purse. "We need to get going if we're gonna make our movie, so let's just pay and get out of here."

"Kay kay," Gibby said, pulling out his own wallet.

Sam reached into her bag and pulled out a few bills too.

"Sam?" Freddie whispered, looked down at the cash in her hand. "What are you doing?"

"Paying for my food?" Sam replied.

"But…I usually pay for you when we go out like this," Freddie said. "You don't have to worry about it."

"No, it's fine, I got it," Sam said, giving him a small smile.

"Well are you sure? Because I-"

"Freddie…leave it, okay?" Sam said firmly.

"Alright," Freddie conceded, giving his girlfriend a strange look.

…

"Okay, we have ten minutes before the movie starts," Carly said as they all walked into the theatre lobby. "I'm gonna run to the bathroom real quick."

"I'll come with you," Sam said.

"Man, girls really do always go to the bathroom together," Gibby said, shaking his head as Sam and Carly headed towards the restrooms.

"Yeah, it's a chick thing," Freddie shrugged. "Come on, there's no line at the concession stand."

"Oh sweet, I can get some gummy bears," Gibby said happily.

"Hi," Freddie said to the cashier behind the counter. "Can I get two medium sodas and two large popcorns? Oh, and a box of those Ju Ju bees."

"You know, I was thinking," Gibby frowned as Freddie paid for the snacks. "Why do you never buy me food? You always buy Sam food."

"Because Sam's my _girlfriend_," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"So? That makes her _so _much more important than me?"

"Just buy your bears!" Freddie snapped.

Once Gibby had purchased his snack, the boys went back to meet the girls, who were waiting for them by the theatre entrance.

"Here you go, baby," Freddie said, handing Sam her snacks.

"Oh…you-you didn't have to do this," Sam said, looking at the food with an odd expression.

"It's what I always buy you when we go to the movies," Freddie shrugged.

"Well here," Sam said, reaching into her pocket and handing him a few bills.

"Sam? Why are you giving me money?" Freddie asked.

"For the popcorn and stuff."

"No, you don't have to pay me for that," Freddie said.

"I want to," Sam said.

"But you already paid for your dinner-"

"So? I can pay for this too."

"But you-"

"Just take the money, will you?" Sam snapped.

"Um…Sam?" Carly frowned. "You okay?"

"I'm fine," Sam mumbled.  
"Sam…baby, what's wrong?" Freddie asked.

"Nothing!"

Freddie glanced over at Carly.

"Um, Gibby and I will wait for you two in the theatre," Carly said, grabbing Gibby's wrist.

"No! This was just about to get interesting!" Gibby moaned as Carly yanked him away.

"Nothing's wrong, Freddie," Sam said firmly once they were alone.  
"Then why have you been acting so weird lately?" Freddie asked.

"I haven't been acting weird."  
"Yes you have," Freddie nodded. "It's like whenever I go to pay for something for you, you freak out. The other day at the smoothie you refused to let me buy you fries. Last night when we were hanging out at the mall, you didn't want me to get you a Churro even though you _love _them. You paid for yourself at the pizza place, and now you want to give me money for your popcorn?"  
"So I'm crazy for spending my own money? Is that right?" Sam asked.

"Well…yeah," Freddie said. "I mean, you've never been one to turn down an offer for someone to buy you something."

"Just because you're my boyfriend doesn't mean you have to buy me everything," Sam said softly, looking down at her shoes.

"No, I guess not," Freddie agreed. "But I don't mind getting you food when you're out; I know you really like it."

"Well I don't want you to anymore," Sam said firmly.

"Why not?" Freddie frowned.

"Because."

"Because isn't an answer, Sam," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Just tell me why you really don't want me to buy you-"

"Because I'll become my mother!" Sam exclaimed.

Freddie looked at her, confused. "Um…wanna back up there and explain?"

"Look, you know my mom's dating agenda," Sam sighed. "She dates a guy and just gets him to buy her a bunch of stuff without really caring about him. It's pathetic…I already have a prison record like her, I don't want to have that reputation too."

"Sam," Freddie smiled, putting his arms around her. "Baby, that's ridiculous."

"Is it?" Sam mumbled. "We've been back together for about five months now…I bet you that within that time you've spent half your savings just buying me food."

"I highly doubt that," Freddie said.

"Well you've spent a lot!" Sam snapped.

"Sam," Freddie said gently. "First of all, I may spend a lot on you, but…it's not like you're forcing me to. Believe it or not, if there ever comes a time where I can't afford to buy you a third muffin because my mom cut off my allowance again, I _know _how to tell you that. But for the time being, you're not exactly hacking away at my savings. And second, you're not becoming your mother."

"Yes I-"

"You said that when you mom dates guys, she gets them to get her all this stuff without really caring about them," Freddie continued. "But you care about me, right?"

Sam gave him a small smile. "Well yeah."

"Exactly," Freddie grinned. "And besides, you buy me stuff too. You paid the bill when we went out for my birthday last month, and you ordered that model train I really wanted online."

"I know," Sam said. "But…I just don't want people to think that I'm using you."

"No one thinks that you're using me, Sam," Freddie told her. "And if they think they do? Who cares! You just told me yourself that you care about me, I know you're not using me, what else matters?"

Sam didn't reply.

"Sam, I don't mind buying you things because I love you," Freddie said. "And you know I wouldn't be spending my money on just anyone…even I'll admit I'm pretty stingy."

Sam laughed. She looked up at her boyfriend. "You'll promise you'll let me know if my food habits can't keep up with your wallet?"

"I promise," Freddie nodded. "So how about we go find Carls and Gib in the theatre and you start on some of that popcorn that I'm pretty sure has had you drooling since you got it?"

Sam playfully swatted his shoulder. "I was not drooling over the popcorn."

"Oh, well then I guess you must've been drooling over _me _then," Freddie smirked.

"In your dreams, Fredbutt," Sam said chuckled, taking his hand as they walked into the theatre.


	340. Chapter 340

**AN-So this oneshot is actually rated T. I don't think any of you actually mind, but I decided just to post this so you would know. Hope you like it!**

…**.**

_Favorite_

"New rule!" Carly said, rolling her eyes as she walked into the iCarly studio, finding Freddie and Sam cuddled up with each other, making out on a beanbag chair. "If you two are going to insist on making out when you're alone for three minutes, send me a text or _something_ so I don't have to keep walking in on this!"

"Don't be such a baby," Sam said, pulling away from her boyfriend. "You should be used to it by now."

"Yeah, Sam and I have been dating for almost six months," Freddie nodded.

"I know that," Carly said. "But it's still a little awkward for me to just walk in here and see you two playing tonsil hockey! I mean, what if you had to keep walking in on me in your house making out with my boyfriend."

"You don't have a boyfriend, though," Sam pointed out.

"Yes thank you, I'm aware of that!" Carly snapped. "It was hypothetical!"

"She has a point," Freddie sighed, looking over at his girlfriend. "Maybe we should try and limit our make-out sessions when we're hanging out over here. It's not really fair to Carly."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Sam mumbled.

"Thank you," Carly smiled, handing each of them a bottle of iced tea. "Now can we get back to planning iCarly? I'm thinking we try and do another prank on Neville bit. Maybe we can call him over here and tell him we want to discuss his favorite types of flower arrangements, and then Gibby can-"

"Hey, wait a minute…" Sam said, cutting her best friend off. "Fredlump, didn't you say your mom was working a double shift at the hospital today?"

"Um yeah," Freddie nodded.

"So she'll be out of your apartment all day?"

"Pretty much."

"And T-Bo still has another five or six hours of work at the Groovy Smoothie, right?" Sam said slowly.

"Yeah," Freddie shrugged. "So?"

"So? You have a perfectly good empty apartment across the hall and you're saying _so_?" Sam exclaimed.

"But I don't get what you're-oh!" Freddie grinned.

"Exactly," Sam smirked. "So how about we go take advantage of that empty apartment?"

"Don't have to ask me twice," Freddie said, quickly jumping to his feet and pulling Sam to hers.

"So you're just going to leave me to make-out?" Carly frowned.

"Um…no?" Sam said. "We're gonna-gonna-"

"Oh just go," Carly sighed, shaking her head.

"Later Carls, we'll come back over to finish planning tonight," Freddie said as him and Sam rushed out of the studio.

"I should've seen this coming," Carly sighed.

…..

"I can't believe I didn't think of this earlier," Freddie said, hurriedly unlocking his front door and pulling Sam in. "I have an empty apartment and a hot girlfriend…seriously, baby, I _need _to get my head examined."

"We'll just have to make up for the lost time," Sam grinned, leaning up to place a deep kiss on his lips.

Freddie wrapped his arms around her waist and began to lead her over to the sofa, but frowned when he saw a plastic sheet covering it.

"What is that?" Sam frowned, pulling away from Freddie.

"Um, I guess my mom got a new covering for the couch," Freddie sighed. "I knew it was a bad idea to show her how to download that new Dirt Defiant app, she's been going around the apartment all week covering everything up."

"Well I'm not making out on a plastic couch," Sam said firmly.

"Do you wanna go out on the fire escape?" Freddie asked.

"Nah, it's raining," Sam said. She took Freddie's hand. "Let's just head into your room."

"My room?" Freddie repeated.

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "Why? Do you not wanna?"

"No, no, I do," Freddie said quickly. "Come on."

They went back to Freddie's bedroom. Sam sat down on the corner of Freddie's bed. "Dude, nice sheets," she grinned. "The Proton Beamer things are a nice touch."

"Proton _Cruisers_," Freddie corrected her, sitting down next to her.

"Not helping yourself, baby," Sam said, lacing her arms around his neck. She began to kiss him again, but before she could get much further, Freddie broke away.

"What's wrong?" Sam frowned.

"Um…it's nothing," Freddie said.

"You sure?"

"Y-Yeah, I'm sure," Freddie said, leaning back down to kiss her. But the second his lips touched hers, he pulled away ago.

"Dude!" Sam said, giving him a strange look.

"I'm sorry!" Freddie said, running a hand through his hair. "This is-This is just too much pressure, okay?"

"What is? We're making out, like we do fifty times a day, according to Carly," Sam said. She put her arm around him. "What's wrong baby? Is-Is there something wrong with _me_?"

"No," Freddie said quickly. "No, you're fine. It's me…I just-we've never really done this before, Sam."

"Um, yes we have," Sam said.

"No, we never, you know, made out on a _bed_," he mumbled, blushing furiously.

Sam laughed. "What? Why's that freaking you out?"

"Because," Freddie said. "You know what kind of _activities _usually happen with couples on a bed. It's just a new situation, and-"

"Freddie, relax," Sam said, smiling. "We're just making out, and happen to be on your bed because your crazy mother took the couch out of the picture. It's perfectly possible for a boy and a girl with _those feelings _to kiss on a bed without taking it to the next level."

Freddie nodded. "Yeah…you're right Sam. Sorry, I-I was just being a nub."

"Don't worry," Sam said, moving closer to him. "I'm used to it."

The couple resumed kissing, but then Sam pulled away.

"Wait a minute," she said, looking a little uncomfortable. "Are you saying…Are you saying that you _wouldn't _want to do anything more than, you know, make-out?"

"I-I don't know," Freddie said lamely. "I mean…would-would you?"

"I asked you first," Sam said. She looked down at her lap. "I mean, you seemed pretty determined to make sure it didn't happen just a few minutes ago."

"No! Sam, I didn't mean that I didn't want-I just-" he stammered. He looked right at Sam. "Baby, believe me, I would definitely want to."

"Well then why were you freaking out about us just being on your bed?" Sam asked.

"Because," Freddie sighed. "I guess I just got scared."

"Well, glad to know the idea of you and me doing that _terrifies _you," Sam mumbled.

"Sam, it's not that," Freddie said gently.

"Well then what is it?" Sam asked.

"Look," he said. "It would be a big step for us…I think that if the two us were to have sex, then we would need to discuss it first."

Sam blushed. "Is that really necessary?"

Freddie nodded. "Yes. Sam, you're beautiful. You're hot and definitely sexy, and I would be lying if I told you I haven't thought about it, but you know that if we did do it, it would take our relationship to a whole different level, and I don't want to hurry you to that level until you're absolutely ready."

Sam looked up at him. "Well what about you? Are _you _ready?"

"Me?"

"Yes you!" Sam grinned. "Sex doesn't have to be just about the girl being ready, you know. You kind of have a part in it too." She took a deep breath. "I'm ready, Freddie. I've _been _ready. But I'm guessing since you've been playing off all the signals I've been sending you, you're-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Freddie said. "What signals? I haven't been getting any signals."  
"Are you kidding me? I've been practically _throwing _myself at you!" Sam said. She thumped the back of his head. "Are you telling me you're such an oblivious nub that you didn't even pick up on that?"

"Well I'm bad with that kind of stuff, you should know that!" Freddie exclaimed. Then he lowered his voice. "So, um, you-you said you _are_ ready?"

Sam nodded. "I love you. I've loved you every day out of the six months we've been together. Probably even longer. But, you know, like you said…we both need to be ready. So don't go thinking that you have to rush into anything if you're not-"

"Are you _crazy_?" Freddie said. "Sam, I love you more than anything in this world. And I'm-I'm ready to _show _you that. But I didn't know that you wanted to too."

"God, this is just like when we first got together," Sam chuckled. "We both had the same feelings, but didn't want to tell each other…"

"It's a bad habit of ours, I guess," Freddie smiled.

"Yeah," Sam said. Then she cleared her throat. "So, um, since-since we established that we both _want _to and we're both ready to, you know, take that step, and we have the apartment to ourselves, and we're _already _on a bed…wouldn't it sort of be the logical conclusion that we should…"

Freddie leaned down, kissing her deeply. "I like the way you think," he whispered seductively. He put his arms around her. "I love you."

"I love you too," Sam said softly.


	341. Chapter 341

_Lyric_

"Hey, what do you think of these earrings?" Carly asked, coming downstairs into the kitchen, where Sam was busy frying some bacon.

"Cute," Sam nodded. "Why? You gonna wear them on your date tonight?"

"Maybe," Carly shrugged. "If I can find a cute dress to go with it. Or do people not wear dresses when they go bowling? Would I look like an idiot if I showed up at the bowling alley with Mitchel wearing a dress? Would I be known as the girl who wears dresses when she bowls?"

"Easy there, kid," Sam said. "Don't freak out. You still have seven hours to figure out your plan."

"Eh, I guess," Carly said. "I just want to make a good impression. I mean, Mitchel is awesome. He's sweet and funny and he's in a band…if I can wow him tonight, maybe he'll write a song about me and I can have the lyrics painted on our future baby's wall."

"Yeah…you should probably simmer it down, otherwise you'll be writing your own song lyrics in an insane asylum," Sam chuckled. She pushed her bacon around in the frying pan. "Man! How long does this new bacon Spencer bought take to cook? I've been at this for half an hour!"

"It takes longer because it has more fat or something," Carly explained.

"For real?" Sam grinned. She looked down at the meat. "And I thought you couldn't get anymore perfect."

"Maybe I should just wear some jeans tonight," Carly said, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge as Sam began to slide her bacon onto a large plate. "Sort of go for the casual look. Freddie thinks you look hot when you just wear jeans, so maybe Mitchel will think I do too."

"Go for it," Sam nodded. "Hey, do you know where the barbecue sauce is? I need to coat my bacon in it before I can chow down."

"It's probably in the studio, where you left it," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "You know, when you were making S'mores?"

"Oh right," Sam said, running towards the steps.

Just as Sam disappeared upstairs, the apartment door opened and Freddie walked in.

"I'm starved!" he announced, slamming the door shut."

"Hello to you too," Carly chuckled.

"My mom found my secret stash of normal food and threw it all away," Freddie sighed. "So now all I have to eat at my place are seaweed chews and tofu logs."

"Ew," Carly cringed. "I'm so sorry."

Freddie sniffed the air. "Whoa, something smells _really _good. Is there bacon here?"

"Yup," Carly nodded.

"Oh yes! I need me some bacon," Freddie said, spotting the plate of bacon on the island. He headed over to it and was just about to pick up a piece of the delectable smelling meat, when he paused.

"Wait," he said slowly. "Whose bacon is this?"

"Sam made it," Carly replied. "She just went upstairs to grab her barbecue sauce."

"And you almost let me _eat _my girlfriend's bacon?" Freddie exclaimed, dropping his piece back down quickly. "What have I done to you, Carly?"

"There's another pack in the fridge," Carly told him. "You can cook yourself some more if you want. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get myself all dolled up to look casual on my date tonight."

"How do you doll yourself up to just look-"

"It's possible, alright!" Carly snapped, starting up the steps.

Freddie rolled his eyes as he washed out the frying pan and placed a few strips of bacon into it, hearing the fat sizzle as they began to cook.

He heard footsteps on the stairs, and a second later his girlfriend appeared, carrying a large bottle of barbecue sauce.

"Hey, baby," she said, walking over to him and giving him a quick kiss.

"Hey yourself, cuteness," Freddie grinned.

"What are you doing?" Sam asked.

"Oh, I was craving some non-organic food, so I decided to have some bacon," Freddie told her. "But don't worry, I'm cooking my own. I didn't touch any of yours over there."

Sam frowned. "Dude, there's a whole _pile_ of bacon on my plate."

"I know," Freddie shrugged. "But I know how testy you get when people take your food. I mean, look at what happened to Gibby when he took the cherry off of your milkshake the other day…I wonder if he can clap again yet."

"So, basically…you were afraid to take my food?" Sam said slowly.

"Um, well…sort of," Freddie admitted.

"Freddie," Sam sighed. "We're dating. We've been boyfriend and girlfriend for almost a year. You don't have to be afraid to eat my food."

"But what about your no-share policy with your snacks?" Freddie pointed out.

Sam gave him a small smile as reached for a piece of her bacon and handed it to Freddie, who looked absolutely shocked at her gesture.

"You're the exception to that rule," she said softly. "The _only _exception."


	342. Chapter 342

**AN-So this chapter is a sequel to chapter 330, where Sam leaves for L.A. but makes a deal with Freddie that when she comes back, they'll see if they still want to be a couple.**

…

_Virtue_

Freddie Benson stood among the rest of his classmates in the large auditorium. They had all just graduated; he was officially done with high school.

"Dude, can you believe it?" Gibby asked, finding him in the crowd. "We graduated!"

"I know, pretty cool feeling, huh?" Freddie grinned.

"And now that we're officially out in the adult world," Gibby said, fishing in his pockets and pulling out a small stack of index cards. "I can finally start sprouting out wisdom like I've always wanted. Here, check out this one: 'Honesty is life's biggest virtue'. Neat, right?"

"Very nice, Gib," Freddie chuckled.

"I'm gonna go test the rest of these out right now," Gibby said. "Later, man."

"Later," Freddie echoed.

He slowly turned and began heading out of the auditorium. He supposed now all that was left to do was find his mom and go home. It was odd, he had been picturing his high school graduation for years as one of the biggest days of his life. But now that it was here and done, he didn't feel as excited as he thought he would. He was _happy_, sure. It had been a nice ceremony, and he had gotten to give his speech as Valedictorian, but something seemed to be missing from today.

Freddie instantly knew what it was; it was the fact that his friends were not all here, graduating with him.

It had been over a year since Carly had left for Italy, and from the phone calls and web chats he had with her, he could tell that she absolutely loved it there. She had made tons of new friends and got to make up for all the time she had been away from her father, she even met a few boys there. She had decided to finish up high school at her new school down in Italy. Since her father was going to be relocated to Austria in just a few months, though, Carly had told him that she was going to be attending college back in America. She was supposed to be here, watching him and Gibby graduate, but her plane had been delayed several hours, so she had texted Freddie that morning and told him that she unfortunately wouldn't be getting into Seattle until the next morning. Freddie didn't mind; he just appreciated the fact that Carly made the effort to come see them.

And then there was Sam. It had been a year since she left too, and Freddie missed her just as much as ever. He kept in contact with her, of course, perhaps even more than he did with Carly. He knew that she was in L.A., living with another girl her age and had started a babysitting service to make enough cash to support herself. He talked with her at least once a week, and he could tell that she was happy down there. But that didn't stop him from wishing she was here with him.

He sighed as he remembered their last conversation, as she was preparing to leave just a few hours after Carly did. Right after they had both confessed that there was still some spark left between them…

"_I'm not going forever. How about we make a deal? When I come back to Seattle, we meet up, and…and if we both realize we feel the same way, and that us both wanting to get back together wasn't just some quick thought we both had…then we'll do it."_

Those words had echoed in his head from the moment she left. He knew that they had done the right thing, giving each other space to see if their feelings would falter with distance, or if they were there to stay. But that didn't make it any easier waiting all this time. He didn't know when she was coming back, be he trusted that she would, just like she said. He just hoped, though, that during their separation that she came to the same conclusion he had.

_Nothing _could take was the strong, overpowering feelings he still had for her.

Once he exited the auditorium, he began to look around to see if he could spot his mother anywhere. When he felt a tap on his shoulder, he was certain it was her, probably all teary eyed about him graduating and getting ready to leave her. He turned around, and was shocked to see a familiar blonde face standing before him.

"Sam!" he exclaimed, wasting no time in throwing her arms around her. "You-You're here? But how? I-You never said you were going to come!"

"What? You thought I'd miss hearing your lame little speech up there?" Sam smirked, hugging him back.

"I didn't see you out there, though," Freddie said.

"Eh, I got caught in traffic on my way down here," Sam explained. "So I got in there just as everything was starting. I tried to go down and sit with Spencer and your mom, but I couldn't get over there without making a big scene, so I just found a seat in the back. You didn't hear me screaming for you and Gibby?"

"I couldn't hear much of anything over my mother crying 'Please don't leave me!'," Freddie chuckled.

"True," Sam shrugged.

"Still though," Freddie said. "I can't believe you're here!"

"I told you I'd come back," Sam said.

"I know, but…still," Freddie grinned. "Wow…I can't believe its been over a year since we've seen each other in person."

"Yeah, somehow the webcam never really captured all your nubbiness," Sam laughed.

Freddie rolled his eyes, though feeling a great rush of warmness wash over him at the familiarity of her insult.

"Come on," he said. "We-We should go grab something to eat and, you know, catch up."

"Won't your mom be looking for you, though?" Sam pointed out.

"Well, she's gonna have to get used to the idea of not having me around twenty-four seven," Freddie said. "So she might as well start now. Come on, T-Bo's got these amazing new burgers at the Groovy Smoothie."

"Oh man, I would _kill _for a good burger," Sam said as her and Freddie began to head outside. "I've been living off of cheeseburgers from Inside-Out Burger…they're real good, but I've been craving a good old fashioned hand-made burger for ages."

…..

"So tell me," Freddie said as Sam began to chow into her burger. "What's it like being a babysitter? I mean, no offense, but I never would've thought that'd be something you were interested in."

"It's actually a lot of fun," Sam said, talking with her mouth full. "The kids are all pretty cool. Plus it's not like I'm doing it all by myself. My roommate Cat's there too. In fact…the two of us actually have enough money saved away to open up an actual daycare center."

"Whoa, are you serious?" Freddie exclaimed. "Sam, that's huge!"

"We haven't found a location yet," Sam shrugged. "And since we'd be an actual business, and not just working out of our apartment, we'd need to get certified and everything, but we're starting to look at spaces.

"W-Wow," Freddie said, sipping his smoothie. "So um, I guess…I guess you would be staying in L.A. permanently then."

Sam shook her head. "Not necessarily. Cat just graduated from her performing arts high school last week, and her Nona eloped and moved to Canada a month ago, so really, none of us have anything tying us down to L.A. We've pretty much decided we're down for moving anywhere."

"Oh," Freddie nodded.

"So what about you, Mr. Cal Tech," Sam said, pouring ketchup onto her fries. "You all excited for college in the Fall?"

"Yeah, Cal Tech has got one of the best computer engineering programs around," Freddie nodded. "Plus, you know, moving away from my mom is an added bonus."

"Unless she decides to follow you, that is," Sam pointed out.

"Oh man, don't even say that," Freddie moaned.

Sam laughed. "Oh!" she said suddenly, unzipping her bag. "I almost forgot…I brought you something."

"Sam, you didn't have to-" Freddie began as Sam handed him a napkin. "Um…a napkin?"

"Flip it over, nub," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "One of the best things about living in L.A. is that there are celebrities _everywhere_. One night while Cat and I took some kids to the movies, we were waiting at the concession stand, and one of the kids pointed out-"

"Natasha Birdmen!" Freddie gasped, turning over the napkin, nearly falling out of his seat. "You-You got me an autograph from Natasha Birdmen? Princess Ablogata?"

"You like it?" Sam asked.

"Like it? I'm going to _frame _this," Freddie said. "I-Thank you!"

"Eh, it was no big deal," Sam said.

"Um, no, it's a _very _big deal," Freddie corrected.

"Okay…it's a big deal," Sam grinned.

"I owe you for this," Freddie said.

"You just bought me food," Sam said.

"Food does not compare to an autograph from one of the stars of _Galaxy Wars_," Freddie said.

Sam chuckled, taking a sip of her smoothie. "Okay," she suddenly, putting her beverage down. "I think we've beaten around the bush long enough here."

"Um…what-what do you mean?" Freddie asked.

"You remember what we agreed when I left," Sam said. "We said that when I came back, we'd-we'd decide whether we wanted to-"

"-Give us another try," Freddie finished for her."

"Yeah," Sam mumbled. "Since we both had a chance to meet other people and see if what we felt for each other back then stuck."

Freddie nodded. "So…Um, what-what did you figure out?"

"You first," Sam said firmly. "Did you meet any new girls that made you feel the same way as you did with me?"

"I haven't exactly been dating a bunch of girls, you know," Freddie said.

"But that was the whole point of this thing!" Sam said.

"No, the point was to see whether or not my feelings for you would go away after being away from you for over a year," Freddie said. "And considering the face that no other girl in Seattle even remotely captured my interest in that time, because I was so preoccupied thinking about you, I-I think it's safe to say that those feelings stood that test."

Sam looked down at her lap. "So you really still feel the same way about me you did a year ago?"

Freddie nodded. "If anything, I think-I think I love you more now, Sam. Being away from you, only getting to see you through a computer screen, it made me realize how much I need you in my life. I missed you in a different way than I missed Carly. With Carly, sure, seeing her in person would've been nice, but the phone calls and the web chats…they got me through it. With you though…do you know how much self-control it took for me to not try and kiss you through my webcam every time we talked? So yes, I still love you. I might've been unsure of whether those were my true feelings a year ago, but now I know that they are."

Sam blinked. "Wow…sounds like you had that all planned out then."

"It's been on my mind for awhile, yeah," Freddie mumbled. He took a deep breath. "What about you then? Did-Did you meet any guys in L.A. who-who made you-you know…"

Sam shook her head. "No. I mean, I-I _did _go on a few dates, Cat kept setting me up, I swear, she's almost as bad as Carly with that, but they were all duds. There was one guy who was some big shot soccer player, another guy who was all artsy and poetic, and another dude who was an actual competitive eater, but I just-I just didn't feel anything remotely close to what I, um, what I feel for you. I-I still feel what I felt for you that night…I still love you."

Freddie couldn't contain the goofy grin that was creeping onto his face. "You-You do?"

"So here we are then," Sam smiled. "One year later, and we're still into each other…I guess that means we really _are _meant to be together then."

"Well I mean, if you passed up a competitive eater for me," Freddie chuckled.

"I could never be with anyone who could eat more than me," Sam said. "That dude actually reached over to my plate during our date and _ate _my bacon."

"Unbelievable," Freddie said, amused.

"Yeah, I'd rather have a guy like you with a girly little stomach," Sam said. "At least then my food's safe."

Freddie laughed.

"Okay then," Sam said, looking up at him. "Now that we've established that we still love each other, even after spending a year apart…shall we get on with the other part of our little agreement and _officially _get back together."

"Officially?" Freddie asked, raising an eyebrow. "How do we make it official?"

"Like this," Sam smirked, leaning over and gently kissing him, feeling as though she had found what she had been missing for far too long.

Freddie pulled her closer, his fingers absentmindedly playing with her gold locks, wondering how he had managed to stay sane for over a year without her.

When they pulled apart, he smiled down at her. "I've been waiting forever for this."

"Right back at you," Sam said. She looked down at her phone. "So…how late does your mom let you stay out now, Mr. Graduate?"

"Pfft, I'm eighteen. I do _not _have a curfew anymore," Freddie scoffed.

Sam gave him a knowing look.

"Ten-thirty," he mumbled.

"Well then, we have exactly…three hours and fourteen minutes before Crazy calls out a search party for you," Sam said, giving him a suggestive look. "You wanna go somewhere private?"

"Yeah, I know a nice little place where we can just talk," Freddie nodded, getting to his feet.

"I hope you mean talking with our tongues, Benson," Sam grinned, grabbing her boyfriend's hand, which she was pleased to see still fit perfectly wit hers. "Because we've got a lot of lost time to make up for."


	343. Chapter 343

**AN-Okay, so this oneshot is sort of a Victorious/iCarly/Sam&Cat crossover…I was a little hesitant about this request just because I don't write Victorious fanfiction, but the idea seemed like a really good one that I was actually hoping to see eventually in Sam&Cat, so I gave it a whirl. So I apologize if I didn't do the Bade relationship justice (I like the couple, but like I said, this is my first time ever portraying Jade or Beck in a fanfic). I had a lot of fun writing this one, so I hope you enjoy it. Please let me know how my characterizations are for Cat, Jade and Beck!**

**Oh, and also, in this story Sam and Freddie were together when Sam moved to L.A. It just made it easier for me to write this.**

**And if you're not a fan of Bade or Sam&Cat, there's another oneshot uploaded with this for you!**

…**..**

"Now see," Sam said, typing on her laptop as the three kids her and Cat were babysitting gathered around her. "The key to a good prank email is to first make a very official sounding account. Then you need to make sure that your email sounds all real and authentic too. So no abbreviations or slang or spelling mistakes. Here, check this baby out."

"Dear. Mr. Rubenstien," one of the little boy's began to read. "We are delighted to inform you that you have been selected as the winner of our annual Sweepstakes. In order to claim your prize, you must report to city hall promptly. Please wear the appropriate attire of a chicken suit, as you will be having your picture taken for our website. We look forward to your arrival and presenting you with five hundred thousand dollars. Yours sincerely, the Cluck Bucket Fried Chicken Emporium."

"No way!" the boy's little sister grinned. "Mr. Rubenstien's really going to show up at city hall in a chicken suit?"

"Shoosh yeah he is," Sam nodded, closing her Pearbook. "That will teach _him _to yell at us for having a squirt gun fight in the parking lot."

"Yeah," the third boy nodded. "Just because some papers of his were getting all 'wet'."

"Hi!" Cat said brightly, walking into apartment with Dice, carrying a pizza box.

"Finally, I'm starved," Sam said, getting to her feet and following the two to the kitchen. "You guys left to get that pizza an hour ago; what took you so long?"

"Ask Cat," Dice said bitterly, helping himself to a soda from the fridge.

"Well when we went to pick up the pizza," Cat explained. "The man at the counter told me for an extra twenty bucks, he could remake our pizza with my name written out in pepperonis!"

"Twenty bucks?" Sam exclaimed.

"That's what I said!" Dice nodded.

"But I've never had my name spelled out in pepperoni before," Cat said. "Wait until you see how cool it is! Ta-da!" She flipped the box open, revealing a large pizza with the word _Kat _written out in pepperonis.

"Um…Cat," Sam frowned. "They didn't even spell your name right."

"What?" Cat gasped, looking down at the pizza. "Oh, dang it! Now I have to bring it back and-"

"No!" Sam said quickly. "Here…" she quickly picked off the meat from the 'K' and rearranged it into a 'C'.

"There," she said, stuffing the leftover pepperonis into her mouth. "All better. Bon appetite."

"Oh, wait," Cat said, opening her bag as the kids rushed over to the food. "I bought you a surprise, Sam! Close your eyes."

Sam sighed. "I'm not gonna wind up stuck in marshmallows again, am I?"

Cat giggled. "No, the man at the grocery store won't sell marshmallows to me anymore. He says I have a 'problem'."

"No kidding."

"Just close your eyes and hold out your hands," Cat begged.

"Ugh, fine!" Sam moaned.

Cat pulled out a box and placed them in Sam's hands. "Okay! Open!"

Sam opened her eyes. "Oh no way! You bought me double-stuffed Fat Cakes? Thanks, Cat!"

"You're welcome," Cat smiled. "You told me you were happiest when you had one of those in your mouth…so you should put one in your mouth now."

"Why?" Sam asked suspiciously.

"Um-um…"

"Did you mess up my motorcycle helmet with your Jewlowzer again?" Sam moaned.

"I thought the jewels made it look pretty," Cat said sheepishly.

"Cat!"

"I didn't do that, I swear!" Cat said quickly.

"Then what'd you do?" Sam asked.

"Well, um…you-you know how you said your boyfriend's coming down to visit you this weekend?"

"Freddie? Yeah," Sam nodded. "You didn't book any babysitting gigs, did you? Cat, I _told _you-"

"I didn't book any babysitting gigs!"

"Oh…okay," Sam said.

"And you know how, um, I told you that you two could have the place to yourselves and I'd spend most of this weekend at Elderly Acres with Nona?"

"Yeah…" Sam said.

"Well, you two can still have the place to yourselves," Cat said slowly. "But-But with another couple too."

"Wait, _what_?"

"So how's that Cat pizza, guys?" Cat asked, quickly walked away from Sam.

"Cat, what do you mean another couple's going to be here?" Sam snapped.

"I-I sort of promised my two friends from school they could hang out here this weekend too," Cat admitted. "I thought the concert you and I have tickets for was _this _weekend, not next weekend, so I told them they could come over here while we were gone."

"_Why_?"

"Because I sort of ruined their last date by dropping a chandelier on their dinner table," Cat mumbled.

"Um…how did you manage to drop a chandelier on a dinner table?" Dice asked.

"It wasn't properly secured to the ceiling!" Cat defended.

"But why-never mind," Dice said, going back to his pizza.

"Well why can't you just call up your friends and tell them they can have the place next weekend when we really are at the concert?" Sam asked.

"Because Beck got casted for a shampoo commercial, and it's being shot then," Cat explained.

"Wait a minute, are you talking about Jade and Beck?" Dice frowned.

"Oh yeah, you met them before," Cat smiled.

"Yeah…what a nightmare," he shuddered.

"See!" Sam said triumphantly, putting her arm around the boy. "Dice here doesn't like this anymore than me."

"You didn't like Beck and Jade?" Cat frowned.

"I liked Beck," Dice said. "It's Jade who freaked me out." He looked at his watch. "Oh! I'm supposed to meet a guy about a shipment of moon shoes. I'll see you guys later."

Cat turned to Sam. "Are you mad?"

"Kind of!" Sam said. "This will be the first time I've seen Freddie since I moved down here two months ago, and I kind of wanted to spend some time with him. You know…alone."

"Well Beck and Jade will only be here Friday night," Cat told her. "You'll still have Saturday and Sunday together."

"I guess," Sam mumbled.

"And you can finally get to meet some of my friends from school!" Cat said excitedly. "I don't know why you've never come with me to hang out with them before when I've invited you."

"Um…no offense or anything, but you're _more _than enough for me to handle," Sam said. "Besides, it would be weird hanging around a bunch of people who've known each other for years."

"But I think you and Jade would get along pretty well with each other," Cat said.

"Is she anything like you?" Sam frowned.

"Hmm, I think we have a lot in common," Cat said. "We both like to sing, and act, and-"

"Then trust me, I'm good," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

….

"I can't wait to meet Freddie," Cat said as Sam and Dice sat on the couch, playing a videogame.

"You think he'll sell me some of his hair too?" Dice asked. "I mean, he's pretty popular from iCarly too, right?"

"Um, sure…" Sam said. "Hey, how about you give me twenty bucks right now, and I'll get you some of his hair for you?"

"Deal!" Dice said, handing her the money.

Just then the doorbell rang.

"Ding-dong!" Cat cried.

Sam jolted up and ran over to the door.

"Frednub!" Sam exclaimed, throwing her arms around her boyfriend before he could even step into the apartment.

"I thought his name was Freddie," Cat whispered to Dice as the couple exchanged a quick kiss.

"Hey, baby," Freddie grinned when they pulled apart. "God, I've missed you _so _much."

"I missed you too," Sam said. "Oh, wait. Hold on…"

She reached up and plucked a few hairs from Freddie's head.

"Ow!" he said indignantly, massaging his scalp.

"Here you, Freddie Benson hairs, just like I promised," Sam said, handing the hairs to Dice. She turned back to her boyfriend. "You, baby, just made me twenty bucks."

"Well how nice," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. He looked over at Cat and Dice. "Um, hello."

"Oh, right," Sam said, taking his hand and leading him into the apartment. "Freddie, this is Dice. He live in the building and hangs out here all the time because, let's face it, I'm a blast. And this is my roommate Cat. You know, the chick who's cramming us in here with another couple tonight."

"I'll Jewlowzer your backpack for you," Cat offered, holding up her sparkling Jewlowzer machine.

"Um…no-no thanks," Freddie frowned. "And it's nice to meet both of you. Sam's told me a lot about you guys."

"I was a big fan of your work on iCarly," Dice told Freddie. "Did you use cutting room flow to edit the videos on there?"

"Yeah, I did!" Freddie smiled. "Do you dabble in the art of video editing too?"

"No, but I just got a shipment of that software from my guy," Dice told him. "How much do you think I could get for one unit?"

"Hey Dice, you know what time it is?" Sam said, flicking the boy on the head. "Shut up o'clock." She turned back to Freddie. "Anyway, these people are only coming for tonight. We'll still have tomorrow and Sunday together."

"Hey, as long as I'm with you, I'm good," Freddie said, leaning down to kiss Sam again.

"Okay, twelve-year old in the room," Dice said, heading towards the door. "I'm going to go rot my brain with monster movies back at my place."

"Bye Dice!" Cat called after him. She looked at her phone. "I wonder wear Jade and Beck are."

"Maybe they got lost," Sam mumbled under her breath.

"Hey, do you guys have a bathroom here?" Freddie asked.

"No, we pee outside," Sam smirked.

"Ha, ha," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"The bathroom's around that corner," Cat told him. "And feel free to use my robe if you want!"

"Um, thank you?"

"So, what do you think?" Sam asked once Freddie had left the room.

"Think of what?" Cat asked.

"Of Freddie?"

"Your boyfriend?"

Sam face palmed her forehead just as the doorbell rang again.

"Ding-dong!" Cat said, rushing to the door and opening it. "Hey you guys!"

"Hey, Cat," said a lean boy with long, dark hair as him and a scowling girl dressed in black came into the apartment. "Thanks again for letting us come over tonight."

"Yeah, even though we're stuck sharing the place," the girl muttered.

Sam narrowed her eyes.

"Um, well, this is Sam, my roommate," Cat said. "Sam, that's Beck, and that's Jade."

"Hi, nice to meet you," Beck said, holding his hand out to Sam.

"Yeah…sure," Sam said, still glaring at Jade, who was glaring right back at her.

"And that's Sam's boyfriend, Freddie," Cat said as Freddie came back into the room. "He's from the Internet too."

"Oh right, iCarly," Beck nodded.

"Whatever," Jade snapped.

"Um, Cat?" Sam whispered, stepping closer to her roommate. "I thought you said that you and this Jade chick had a lot in common."

"We do!" Cat exclaimed, moving next to Jade, her bright pink dress contrasting greatly with Jade's black skirt and combat boots. She made to put her arm around the girl. "We're practically twi-"

"No!" Jade yelled, causing Cat to jump and squeal.

"Um, well, this little double date thing should be a lot of fun," Beck said.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "It's always good to have company, right?"

"Nope," Sam mumbled under her breath.

"So…I made chicken for you guys," Cat said.

"Oh cool, that sounds great," Freddie said.

"And I borrowed a movie for you guys to watch later," she continued. "It's about a puppy who moves to Alaska away from all his friends, and thinks that he's going to stay lonely and miserable for the rest of his life."

"Does he?" Jade asked.

"No, silly! He finds true love with an Iditarod dog," Cat grinned.

"Aw," Jade sighed.

"So what are you going to do while we're stuck-I mean, while we're hanging out here?" Sam asked Cat.

"Oh, me and my friend Tori are going to the mall," Cat answered. "Schnieder's Secret is having a big sale. Free panty with every purchase!"

"Ah!" Jade and Sam screamed.

"What? What?" Cat exclaimed, dropping to the floor, clutching her head. "Is it spies? Tell them I don't know anything about my brother!"

"There's no spies, Cat," Beck said, putting his arm around Jade.

"You're still on this?" Freddie asked Sam, amused, helping Cat to her feet.

"What happened?" Cat asked, clutching her chest.

"You know I hate that word!" Jade snapped.

"What word? Panty?"

"Stop saying it!" Sam hissed.

"Wait," Jade said slowly. "You hate that word too?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "You don't like it either."

"If I had a bus I would run over that word until it was just another pile of road kill on the road," Jade said firmly, crossing her arms.

"Very violent, baby," Beck said.

"Alright, well…bye!" Cat called, rushing out the door.

The couples stared at each other awkwardly for a few moments.

"So…" Freddie said, breaking the silence. "That chicken's not going to eat itself, huh?"

"We'll go get some plates," Beck said, as him and Jade headed towards the kitchen.

"I don't like them," Sam whispered to Freddie as they walked away.

"You just met them," Freddie reasoned. "And they seem fine. What don't you like about them?"

"Well, I don't have a problem with the dude," Sam said. "Although I don't entirely trust anyone whose hair's that perfect…But that chick's awful!"

"She's not that bad," Freddie said.

"She's all mean and nasty!"

"Um, okay, baby, I say this with love," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "But you're not exactly a basket of puppies yourself."

Sam glared at him.

"I said it with _love_!" he said quickly.

"I just wish we were by ourselves," Sam sighed. "I mean, we haven't seen each other for two months now."

"I know baby, I wish we had the place to ourselves too," Freddie said. "But there's no use crying over spilled milk."

"Is that another saying from your stupid inspirational calendar?"

"Perhaps," Freddie said. "But let's just make the best of tonight. Maybe you'll make some new friends to hang out with down here."

"Doubt it," Sam mumbled.

"Hey, do you two want any lemonade?" Beck called over to the two. "We picked some up on the way over here."

"Yes, it was supposed to be for the _two _of us, but now that there's _four _of us, please feel free to stick your tongues into our beverage," Jade sneered.

"Jade," Beck sighed.

"What? I'm being nice!"

"Oh, I'm sorry, are you feeling a little crowded in _my _apartment?" Sam asked, stepping over towards Jade.

"Sam," Freddie moaned. "Please don't."

"Don't what? I was just asking our _guest _if she was feeling comfortable," Sam snapped, crossing her arms.

"I'd be a lot _more_ comfortable if you'd-" Jade began, but was quickly cut off by Beck. "So let's dig in!"

"Sounds like a plan!" Freddie said, quickly sitting down at the table with Beck.

"Fine," Jade said, giving Sam one last dirty look before going down to sit next to her boyfriend.

"Fine," Sam echoed, taking her seat next to Freddie.

Beck and Freddie shifted uncomfortably in their seats, both very aware of the tension hovering around them.

"So," Beck said to Freddie, cutting into his chicken. "You're down here from Seattle?"

"Yup, until Sunday," Freddie nodded.

"How is it up there?"

"Lot of rain," Freddie replied. "Does it rain much down here?"

"Not so much, it's pretty hot," Beck told him.

"Ah, well that's nice," Freddie said.

"Yeah, I'm from Canada, so it took me awhile to get used to the new climate."

"Oh we've been to Canada once," Freddie grinned. "Remember, Sam? To visit that Fat Cake factory?"

"Yeah…with Spencer and Gibby," Sam nodded. "Yet another occasion that was supposed to be just the two of us."

"Um…we weren't dating then, baby, remember?" Freddie told her.

"Well if we were, I'm sure you would've been real thrilled to have another couple tag along," Sam retorted.

"Oh, so you think we're _tagging along _right now?" Jade frowned, throwing her fork down.

"Well you're here at my apartment with my boyfriend, so yeah, I think that counts as tagging!" Sam said loudly, throwing her own fork down too.

"Jade-" Beck began.

"Sam," Freddie sighed.

"Oh, is that the only argument you got?" Jade snapped.

"It's the only argument I need!"

"You better watch it, Blondie!" Jade said, standing up.

"You think you scare _me_?" Sam scoffed. "You want me to take you outside and cream you so bad that all that's left will be your stupid blue highlights?"

"I would _love _that!"

"Jade, come on!" Beck said. "You can't talk to her that way in her own apartment."

"Yeah, and Sam, you can't treat Cat's friends like this!" Freddie said to his girlfriend. "So why don't we all just sit down and try to start over?"

"Exactly," Beck nodded.

"You are so _unbelievable_," Sam said to Freddie, thumping the back of his head.

"Ow! What was that for?" Freddie exclaimed.

"For being so annoyingly happy!" Sam snapped. "Why can't you be all wazzed off like _me_, a _normal _person, about our date night being ruined?"

"And why do you have to always try to calm everything down? Huh?" Jade said loudly, glaring at Beck. "You should be yelling too! This was going to be the first time we spent time alone together in a month!"

"And we haven't even seen each other in two months!" Sam screamed at Freddie.

"This is exactly like the time when we were supposed to go out to dinner and you totally let Andre and Robbie just invite themselves," Jade said, putting her hands on her hips. "And instead of telling them to get lost, you bought them _desert_!"

"Oh, that's nothing," Sam said, turning to Jade. "Back in Seattle, _this one_ let his mother tag along on our two-week anniversary and traded our tickets for the premiere of _Blood and Guts IV _for three tickets to the opera just to keep his batty mom happy!"

"Beck and I couldn't even _get _tickets to _Blood and Guts IV _because while we were standing in line, he wouldn't let me scare the guy in front of us out of in the ticket line and they sold out," Jade said. "It was completely jank!"

"You wanna hear jank?" Sam said, rolling her eyes. "When we were at a street fair one time, a guy cut in front of me and got the last funnel cake, and Freddie wouldn't even let me use my butter sock on him to teach him a lesson!"

"Um, can we say something?" Freddie spoke up.

"Yeah, this is getting a little out of hand," Beck agreed.

"No!" Sam said firmly.

"Pipe down," Jade snapped. She turned back to Sam. "So, um…what exactly is this butter sock thing?"

"Oh, it's an old sock that I fill with two pounds of hard butter," Sam said. "Here, I'll show you."

She reached over to her backpack that was lying on the counter and pulled out the infamous butter sock.

"Whoa!" Jade said, sounding impressed as she examined it. "You could brand an elephant with this thing."

"Sure can," Sam said proudly. "The trick is in the swing. Hey, some snobbish dude parked his van in my motorcycle's parking spot out front and refuses to move…wanna see this baby in action smashing some windows?"

"Yeah," Jade nodded. "But…" she reached into her pocket and pulled out a pair of scissors. "If you really wanna destroy a car, the key is to slash the tires. It sends a clearer message."

"Smart," Sam grinned.

"Um…" Freddie frowned as Jade and Sam headed out of the apartment. "I-I don't really understand what just happened."

"Me neither," Beck said, shaking his head. He looked down at his plate. "So this is pretty good chicken, huh?"

"Oh yeah, real moist," Freddie nodded.

….

Three hours later, when Cat returned from the mall, she walked into the apartment to find Sam, Freddie, Jade and Beck all sitting in the living room, laughing, as they played team Battleship.

"I'm back!" Cat announced.

"Oh, hey Cat," Sam said, looking up from the game. "How was the mall?"

"Fun, I bought a bunch of new bottles of nail polish so we can have a roommate make-over night soon!" she said excitedly.

"Yeah…not happening," Sam said.

"Aw," Cat sighed. She sat down with the couples. "So did you guys have a fun date night together?"

"Yes, actually, we did," Beck nodded, draping his arm around Jade.

"You see," Cat said, looking at Sam and Jade. "I told you it would be fun."

"Whatever," Sam said, rolling her eyes as Freddie pulled her closer to him.

"Oh, and Sam? You can probably park your motorcycle back in your spot now," Cat said. "Mr. Pompe's car got vandalized and he had to have it towed."

"Did you see his tires?" Jade asked, grinning.

"And I think it's time to go," Beck said, quickly getting to his feet. He turned to Sam and Freddie. "It was real good meeting you two. We'll have to do this again. Just, you know, not somewhere near any cars."

"Right," Freddie nodded.

"See you Monday," Sam said to Jade.

"Monday?" Cat frowned. "But on Monday we have to babysit Corey and Shawn from apartment 19."

"Oh…well, Jade and I were going to go to the park and try to make dog walkers cry," Sam said.

"Why?" Cat asked.

"Because they're irritating!" Jade said.

"So you can handle watching them on your own for a few hours, right?" Sam said. "Just don't let hem trick you into flooding the bathroom again."

"They said I could make a pool," Cat said, looking down at her feet.

"Well, see you at school, Cat," Beck said.

"Bye!" Cat called as they headed out of the apartment.

"Okay, Cat," Sam said as the front door closed shut. "Good night!"

"Good night?" she repeated. "But I'm not tired."

"Well then go sit in your room or watch Frednub and I make out," Sam shrugged. "Your choice."  
"Sam," Freddie warned, though he smiled at his girlfriend's forwardness, lacing his arms around her waist.  
"Okay, okay, I'm going!" Cat said, quickly running back to her room.

"Finally alone," Sam whispered, planting a deep, passionate kiss on Freddie's lips.

"Was it worth the wait?" Freddie grinned.

"I'll tell you in a minute," Sam chuckled.

"Wait," Cat said, coming back into the room.

"What?" Sam exclaimed, pulling away from Freddie.

"Is his name really Frednub? Or is it just Freddie?"

"Good _night, _Cat," Sam said, rolling her eyes as she leaned up to continued kissing Freddie.


	344. Chapter 344

_Repeat_

"Unbelievable!" Freddie exclaimed, storming into the Shay's apartment.

"What's wrong?" Carly frowned, looking up from the textbook she was reading. "I thought you and Sam were going to the zoo today."

"We did!" Freddie said as he sat down on the couch next to Carly. "But of course, Sam had to turn what was supposed to be a delightful date into a nightmare!"

"Did you guys get banned from the zoo too?" Carly moaned.  
"Yup! All because of an incident with some rare lemur," Freddie nodded. "Which was all Sam's fault!"  
"Okay," Carly sighed, closing her textbook. "What happened?"

"Oh, I'll tell you what happened!" Freddie said hotly. "So Sam and I were at the zoo…"

…

"_Wow, baby, isn't it just a fantastic day at the zoo?" Freddie asked, holding Sam's hand lovingly as they walked past the animal exhibits. _

"_Whatever," Sam snapped. "I'm hungry. Buy me some peanuts, Fredgrub!" _

"_Sure, I'd be happy too," Freddie smiled, walking over to a vendor. "Hi there!" he said to the woman at the food cart. "I'd like your largest pack of peanuts for my beautiful girlfriend here. I know that zoos overcharge for their snacks, but money is no object for me when it comes to my girl." _

"_Whoa," the vendor said, handing Freddie a large bag of peanuts. "You sure are a great boyfriend, sir!" _

"_Oh, well, I try," Freddie said, smiling modestly. He turned back to Sam, handing her the peanuts. "Here you are, Princess Puckett." _

"_Finally," Sam said, rolling her eyes, grabbing the bag from Freddie. _

"_So what exhibit should we go see first?" Freddie asked her. "Penguins? Zebras? Tigers?" _

"_Which ever animal would be most likely to come over and scratch up that hideous shirt you're wearing," Sam said. "I mean really! Did your mom go to the Gross, Ugly and Cheap store to buy you that?" _

"_My mom __**does **__have a questionable sense in fashion," Freddie chuckled. "Hey, I know! Why don't we go and see the monkeys?" _

"_If it will get you to shut up, sure," Sam said, shaking her head. _

_Freddie led her over to the monkey cages, where they spotted a black and white lemur swinging around on a branch. _

"_How cool is that, Sam?" Freddie said excitedly. "This plaque here says that this is a rare Persian lemur." _

"_It looks stupid," Sam said, carelessly throwing her peanut shells on the ground.  
"Um, here, why don't I get those for you," Freddie said, picking up the shells. "There's a no littering sign right there; I think they want to make sure that the lemur doesn't reach out of its cage and get any outside food." _

"_How could that pathetic lemur reach his arm all the way out here to get my peanut shells?" Sam scoffed. "Seriously, Freddie! You are __**such **__an idiot!" _

"_But I just want to make sure that the poor lemur stays safe," Freddie told her. _

"_So you care about the lemur more than me? Huh?" she exclaimed. _

"_What? No, of course not! I love you so, so much!"_

"_Yeah, right," Sam snapped. She stepped closer to the cage and dumped out the rest of her peanuts. _

"_Um, what-what are you doing?" Freddie asked. _

"_Proving to you that this monkey's not going to reach out and get the peanut shells," she told him. _

"_Maybe tempting the lemur like that isn't the smartest thing to-"_

"_Oh? So now I'm dumb?" _

"_No, no, I just meant-"_

"_I can't believe you! You always insult me like this!" _

"_I'm sorry that you may have perceived what I was-" Freddie began. _

"_Look out!" a woman suddenly exclaimed. "That monkey has peanut shells!" _

_Sure enough, the lemur had reached out and grabbed the peanut shells and was now hurling them at the zoo guests. _

"_Hey! Did you two give that lemur those peanuts?" a zookeeper yelled, running over to Sam and Freddie. _

"_Well, yes, sir," Freddie nodded. "But my girlfriend here didn't mean any-"_

"_You two are coming with me!" the zookeeper frowned, grabbing their forearms. "You two are hereby banned from the zoo! Forever!"_

…

"-And that's what happened," Freddie finished.

"The zookeeper really shouted 'forever' like that?" Carly frowned.

"He was crazed with anger," Freddie said.

"But wait, why would Sam just waste her peanuts like that?" Carly asked. "She loves peanuts. They're her third favorite type of nut!"

"That's irrelevant!" Freddie exclaimed. "The point is that this whole thing was Sam's fault, and you know what? She's mad at _me _for it!"

"Really?"

"I know!"

"Well, why don't you go and try and talk things out with her?" Carly suggested.

"Nope," Freddie said firmly. "If she wants to fix this, she can come to _me _and apologize."

"Wow," Carly chuckled. "Someone's got his big boy pants on today."

"Thank you," Freddie said. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go upstairs and take a bubble bath to try and rewind after all this stress!"

….

About an hour later, Carly was still sitting downstairs studying when Sam slammed open the apartment door.

"Do you have any ham?" she fumed, storming into the kitchen.

"Um, yeah," Carly nodded. "So, um…I'm guessing that little zoo date you and Freddie had didn't go so well?"

"Gee, how'd you know?" Sam mumbled, rolling her eyes as she stuffed the meat into her mouth. "Freddie can be such a _jerk _sometimes!"

"Well, um, I-I'm sure that he didn't-"

"Did you that the nub got us _banned _from the zoo?" Sam exclaimed.

Carly frowned. "_Freddie_ did?"

"Yeah, he wazzed off some lemur," Sam said, shaking her head.

"Okay," Carly said. "Tell me what happened."

"Fine," Sam said. "So we were at the zoo, right? And we were about to go look at some of the animals…"

…

"_Of course you picked the hottest dang day of the year to drag me to the zoo!" Freddie said bitterly as him and Sam walked through the zoo. _

"_Well baby, it's the first official day of summer," Sam said happily. "I thought we should spend it out in the fresh air." _

"_I hate the fresh air." _

"_Well, maybe you'd feel better if you got something to eat," Sam reasoned. _

"_Of course, you're already hinting at me to buy you food," Freddie grumbled. "Fine, if it will get you off my back, then whatever." _

"_Oh no, baby, I don't want you to-"_

"_Alright," Freddie sighed, approaching the nearby vendor. "Looks like I'm going to be forced to shell out __**my **__money for my girlfriend's snack, even though this stuff costs a fortune! Give me a bag of peanuts…they're the cheapest thing this place has." _

"_Whoa, real great boyfriend," the vendor muttered to Sam, her voice dripping with sarcasm. _

"_He-He's actually really charming and sweet," Sam said. _

"_Here," Freddie snapped, tossing Sam the peanuts as they walked away._

"_Thank you, Freddie, I really appreciate you buying me these," Sam smiled appreciatively. _

"_Yeah, yeah, sure," Freddie said. "So what filthy animals are we going to see, so we can get out of here already? Penguins? Zebras? Tigers?" _

"_Whatever you want," Sam said, patting his shoulder. "And by the way, that is an __**awesome **__shirt, it looks really good on you. Did your mom buy that for you?" _

"_Will you quit ripping on my mom?" Freddie said loudly. "She's a __**wonderful **__woman!" _

"_I know that, I didn't say-"_

"_Let's just go see the monkey exhibit, it's the shortest walk," Freddie grumbled. _

"_Okay, sounds good to me!" Sam said brightly._

_The walked over to a cage, and Sam excitedly looked in at the adorable lemur. "Oh how cute! I wonder why type of lemur he is." _

"_Well if you would open your eyes and __**read**__," Freddie said harshly. "You would see that the plaque right in front of you says that it's a rare Persian lemur." _

"_How cultural," Sam said, popping one of her peanuts into her mouth. A few shells accidently fell from her bag. "Whoops. Let me just-"_

"_Sam! You can't litter!" Freddie exclaimed, grabbing the shells from the ground. "People are going to stare at me! You always embarrass me in public like this! What if that stupid monkey reaches out and grabs the shells? I'll never live that humiliation down!" _

"_I'm sorry, baby, it was an accident," Sam said. "But I think it's cute how concerned you are for that lemur's safety. It's very-"_

"_Who cares about the dang monkey? All I care about is my reputation, here!" He flung one of his arms out for emphasis, and in the process, he knocked Sam's bag of peanuts out of her hands, spilling the contents right in front of the cage. _

"_Oh come on!" Freddie cried. "For crying out loud, Sam! How could you have been so stupid?" _

"_You-You think I'm stupid?" Sam asked shakily. _

"_Look out!" a woman suddenly exclaimed. "That monkey has peanut shells!" _

_Sure enough, the lemur had reached out and grabbed the peanut shells and was now hurling them at the zoo guests. _

"_Hey! Did you two give that lemur those peanuts?" a zookeeper yelled, running over to Sam and Freddie. _

"_It was her! All her!" Freddie exclaimed, pointing at Sam. _

"_But, Freddie, sweetie, I-" Sam began._

"_You two are coming with me!" the zookeeper frowned, grabbing their forearms. "You two are hereby banned from the zoo!"_

…

"-And that's what happened," Sam said, wrapping up her story. "And I'm not exaggerating at _all_."

"Uh-huh," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Total jerk, right?" Sam said.

"Sure," Carly sighed. "And let me guess, he's all mad at you for this."

"Yeah, how'd you know?" Sam frowned.

"Um, lucky guess," Carly said quickly. "Look, I don't know what exactly happened at that zoo, but maybe you should call Freddie and-"

"Me call him? No way!" Sam exclaimed. "If he wants to apologize to _me_, he has my number."

"Of course," Carly moaned.

"Hey, Carly?" Freddie said, coming down the stairs. "That bubble bath you have up there is really-" he stopped as he spotted his girlfriend. He cleared his throat. "Hello," he said coldly.

"Hello," Sam muttered, glaring at him.

"Um…so I'm gonna go upstairs," Carly said. "And see if I can-"

"What are you even doing here?" Sam said to her boyfriend, putting her hands on her hips.

"What are _you _doing here?" Freddie retorted.

"_I _was just telling Carly how you got us banned from the zoo!"

"_I _got us banned from the zoo?" Freddie scoffed. "You practically begged for them to throw us out with your little shenanigans!"

"Guys!" Carly said, trying to make her voice heard over the couple's argument. "Guys, I-oh. This is gonna be a repeat of the El Guapo Taco incident…"

"You told Carly it was _my _fault?" Sam yelled.

"Because it was!"

"It was all _your _fault!"

"In what universe?"

"This universe!"

Carly sighed and went over to the kitchen and opened up one of the drawers, pulling out a whistle. She then stepped back over to the feuding couple and, taking a deep breath, blew hard.

"Ow!" Freddie cried.

"What the heck, Carly?" Sam winced, covering her ears.

"Alright you two!" she said firmly. "Enough of this arguing, got it?"

"But he started it-"

"No she did-"

"I don't care whose fault it was that you got banned from the zoo!" Carly exclaimed. "Maybe instead of focusing on _that_, you two should focus on the fact that you got banned from yet another place! Now you guys can't go to the botanical gardens, the planetarium, Hey Foods, five gas stations and the waterpark! Don't you think that this is a problem? Normal couples don't get banned from half of Seattle! You guys going to be on _lists_! And then I'm going to be the girl who's friends with the Crackpot Couple!"

"Crackpot Couple?" Freddie repeated.

"Yeah, that's right," Carly nodded, crossing her arms. "That's what they'll call you! Honestly, you guys, you've been together for almost a year! You'd _think _you'd know how to act civilized in public, but noooooo! You're animals! Is this how you're going to be next year when you're in college? Or if you ever get married? You guys are out of control, and until you learn how to behave _properly, _you-you're grounded!"

"What?" Sam frowned. "You can't ground us!"

"Yeah, you're not the boss of us," Freddie agreed. "And I think you're overreacting _way _too much here."

"Oh am I?" Carly snapped.

"Yeah," Sam said. "I mean, so Frednub and I got banned from a few places. That doesn't make us a Crackpot Couple."

"We're a perfectly _functional _couple," Freddie said proudly, putting his arm around Sam.

"That's right," Sam said, beaming up at him. "No matter how many places ban us for monkey problems or causing an entire waterslide to be shut down for seven hours."

"We'll just find new places to go on dates and hang out," Freddie said. He looked down at Sam. "Come on, baby. Let's leave Sassypants alone and head back to my place. My mom's still at work for another few hours."

"I'm liking where this is going," Sam grinned, taking Freddie's hand, leading him out of the apartment.

The couple slammed the door shut behind them, and Carly grinned triumphantly.

"And that's how you do it," she said to herself, picking back up her textbook and flopping down on the couch again.


	345. Chapter 345

**AN-This oneshot is a sequel to chapter 332, where Sam and Carly are both competing for a boy again, and Freddie tells the boy to date Carly because he knows that he'd be jealous if he went for Sam. **

…

_Population_

"Oh, Brendan! We should go to couple's night at coffee shop tonight," Carly said as her and her boyfriend cuddled together on the Shay's sofa.

"They have a couple's night at the coffee shop?" Sam frowned, looking up from the game of Chinese checkers she was playing with Gibby.

"Yeah, I went there once with this old lady named Hazel," Gibby said. "You know, after I fell on her."

Everyone frowned and stared at him.

"What?" Gibby said.

"Well I would be _delighted _to go to a couple's night with you," Brendan smiled. "We can get ourselves some hot lattes to sip while we just sit and talk."

"Oi, you two are nauseating," Sam said, though she gave her best friend a smile to let her know she was kidding.

Carly and Brendan had been dating for two weeks now, and seeing how happy they were whenever they were together made the fact that he had picked Carly over her to date somewhat easier on Sam. She might have liked Brendan when she first met him, but now, after she really got to know him while he was hanging around Carly, she realized that he really was a better match for her best friend. The boy might be hot, but he was just way too sappy for her liking. Still, though, she did feel a little jealous when she thought about the idea that Carly was in a great new relationship while she was still single.

"Hey," Freddie said, walking into the apartment. "Oh, hey Brendan. You gonna watch us rehearse for iCarly?"

"You bet," Brendan nodded.

"Dude, this Chinese checkers game your mom left over here sucks," Sam said, getting up from the game.

"Hey! You can't just abandon our game like that!" Gibby exclaimed.

"I can and I did," Sam snapped.

"Well there aren't many games on her Aggressive Parenting approved list," Freddie shrugged.

"It doesn't matter, we need to go start setting up in the studio anyway," Carly said, standing up.

"Are my tights up there?" Gibby asked.

"Yup," Carly nodded.

"Sweet," Gibby grinned, rushing upstairs.

"I'll be up in a minute," Brendan said, heading into the kitchen. "I just want to grab some water. You guys want anything?"

"I'll just have some water too, sweetie," Carly said.

"Root beer for me," Sam said as her and Carly began to climb up the steps.

"I'm gonna bring up some fruit," Freddie said, joining Brendan in the kitchen.

"Thanks!" Carly called down.

"So," Freddie said, once him and Brendan were alone in the kitchen. "Things look like they're going really good between you and Carly."

"Oh yeah, she's amazing," Brendan grinned. "She's easy to talk to, she get's so excited about things…seriously, I think this is the best relationship I've ever been in. And you know what? I owe it all to you, dude."

"Me?" Freddie frowned. "What did I do?"

"You know," Brendan said, setting everyone's beverages down on the counter and pulling out his phone to check a text he had just gotten. "A couple of weeks ago, when Carly and Sam both wanted to go out with me, and I didn't know which girl to ask out? I asked for your advice and you told me that I should date Carly. Without you, who knows when I would've finally gotten together with her. Oh! The roses I ordered for her just arrived in your lobby. Back in a sec!"

Freddie chuckled as the love-struck teen raced out of the apartment. He grabbed a few apples and then began to head upstairs, but stopped in his tracks, spotting Sam on the landing, wearing a crestfallen expression.

"Um…hi?" Freddie said.

"Was what he just said true?" Sam asked softly.

"What?" Freddie asked, confused. "What did he say?"

"That-That you _told _him to ask Carly out instead of me?"

Freddie's eyes widened. "No! I mean…well, yes. But-But I didn't mean-"

"I can't believe you," Sam mumbled, quickly shoving past him and running out of the apartment.

"Sam!" Freddie yelled, running after her. But before he even reached the door, he tripped over the Chinese checker game that Sam and Gibby had left set up.

"Ow!" he moaned, trying to scramble to his feet. But by the time he regained his stature, Freddie knew that she was already out of the building.

He angrily kicked the checkerboard. Sam wasn't supposed to find out what he did! Now she was mad at him, and it was all his fault.

He slowly sunk down onto the couch.

_I only did it because I didn't want to see you with him_, Freddie thought miserably to himself. _Because…because I want to be the one you're with, Sam._

…

Sam angrily slammed the door of her house, storming into the kitchen and grabbing a bag of cheese puffs.

"Stupid, annoying, freak of a nub," Sam mumbled, throwing herself down on the couch. How could Freddie do that do her? How could he have completely ruined her chance of having a guy ask her out? Sure, she was glad Brendan wound up with Carly, but still! It was the principle of the matter; Freddie Benson had gone out of his way to make sure that the thing that would've made her happy at the time didn't happen.

Did he just want to see her hurt? Was that his goal? Well, if it was, he certainly succeeded. She squeezed her eyes tightly. She was not going to cry over this. There was no way she would give Benson the satisfaction…

Just then she heard a loud knock at her door. "Sam!"

She moaned, stuffing a handful of cheese puffs in her mouth. Just what she needed.

"Sam!" Freddie called through the door again, knocking hard. "Sam, please open up. I need to talk to you."

"Ugh!" Sam groaned, jumping up and marching towards the door. She didn't need this dork standing at her doorstep all night…

"What?" she snapped, throwing the door open. "What do you want? Haven't you done enough already?"

"Sam, please. Just let me-"

"Are you mad at me or something?" she demanded. "Huh? Is that why you made sure Brendan didn't ask me out?"

"No! I-"

"Are you upset about the whole Pear Store thing still? Or about putting lime Jell-O in your mom's shoes?"

"That was you?" Freddie frowned.

"Well, whatever, we're even now!" Sam said. "So congratulations!"

"I wasn't trying to get even with you for anything," Freddie said. "And I wasn't trying to hurt you either, Sam."

"Well then why'd you tell Brendan to date Carly?" Sam asked.

"Well…because," Freddie said. "He asked me which of you he thought he should date, and I picked Carly because…because I thought it would bother me less!"

Sam looked up at him. "Huh?"

"Look," Freddie said slowly. "I just didn't want you to date Brendan, okay?"

"Why?" Sam asked. "Because you thought it would make me too happy?"

"No!" Freddie exclaimed. "Because it would have pretty much _destroyed_ me!"

Sam looked completely taken aback. "What?"

"Sam," Freddie sighed. "I'm sorry that I kept you from being asked out by Brendan…but you want to know what? I would do it again. Basically, if I had my way, I'd like to keep every guy in the Seattle population from asking you to be their girlfriend…because deep down, I've always sort of wanted you to be _my _girlfriend again."

"What?" Sam said again, though her voice was much softer now.

Freddie looked down at his feet, feeling his cheeks reddening. "I know I was sort of selfish…but when he asked me, I just sort of panicked. I can handle him dating Carly because I don't have feelings for her, but if he asked you out, and-and you said yes? It would've crushed me."

"You-You want me to be your girlfriend again?" Sam asked quietly.

"Sam, I'm sorry," Freddie said. "I shouldn't have interfered like that; I had no right to mess around with your love life like that. And-And I understand why you would be mad at me. But-But I just need you to know that it wasn't out of anger or revenge, but out of-"

He was cut off as Sam grabbed his shoulders suddenly, pressing her lips against his. At once, Freddie reciprocated, wrapping his arms around her, not really comprehending what had just happened, but also not caring at all. All that mattered was that right now he was finally kissing Sam Puckett again.

When they pulled apart, Sam looked up at him.

"Um…" Freddie said, finding it hard to form a sentence at the moment. "You-I-Wow."

"Yeah," Sam said, looking slightly surprised at her own bold movement. She took a deep breath. "Why didn't you say anything sooner?"

"You of all people should know how hard it is to accept your feelings sometimes," Freddie said, giving her a small smile.

"Well…yeah," Sam nodded. "But, I mean…if I had known…"

"Are you saying you feel the same way then?" Freddie asked, trying not to get his hopes up. It seemed to good to be true; to have Sam go from wanting to kill him to back to being his girlfriend in just a few short miracles.

"Come on," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Would I have just done _that _if I didn't have _some _feelings for you?" She sighed. "You know, the reason I really wanted Brendan to ask me out was because deep down…I really missed you. And I thought having someone again would make me miss you less."

"Really?"

Sam nodded. "Really."

Freddie tried to contain his excitement, which was overflowing him right now. "So, um, does-does this mean-are we-"

"Yes, Freddork," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "We're back together….right?"

"Absolutely," Freddie said instantly, leaning back down to kiss her.

"We should probably get back to Carly's," Sam said when they separated again. "We still have to rehearse."

"Oh…right," Freddie nodded. "Carly's probably wondering what happened to us. I guess we should get going. Besides, I need to thank Brendan."

"How come?"

"Well, think about it," Freddie grinned. "If he hadn't started going to Ridgeway, you and Carly wouldn't have fought over him, he would've never asked me for my advice, and we wouldn't have just had that fun little conversation, and therefore we wouldn't have just gotten back together."

"Wow, I guess he did play a big part in this," Sam nodded. "Well, I guess this means that Carly will be even _more _eager to try and set up a bunch of double dates with the four of us now…What fun."


	346. Chapter 346

**AN-So this chapter is kind of short. It's a sequel to chapter 333, where Freddie realizes that Sam left Seattle. This oneshot is him realizing WHY she left.**

…

_Farm_

"Wait, what do you mean she's gone?" Spencer frowned.

"I mean she left Seattle! She took that motorcycle and cruised off somewhere!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Why?" Gibby asked.

"Because Carly left? Because iCarly's over? I don't know!" Freddie snapped, frustrated.

"Are you sure she left?" Spencer asked.

"Yes," Freddie nodded. "And I have no clue where she is! I tried calling her my whole way back from her house, I've sent her a million texts, and I ever tried to do that Pearphone finder thing, but she must've been smart and took out her sim card!"

"Maybe we should call the police," Spencer said, concerned.

"It would do any good," Freddie sighed. "If Sam Puckett doesn't want to be found, she's not going to be found."

"Well are you _positive _you have no idea where she would go?" Spencer asked him.

"No," Freddie said. "I mean, she doesn't have a passport, so she couldn't have gone to Canada…legally, at least. She hates the smell of Oregon, so I'm guessing that's out. Maybe she's hiding out in Olympia for awhile, or trying to get a plane to somewhere down south."

"Maybe she went to a farm or something," Gibby suggested.

"Gibby!" Freddie yelled. "Why would Sam go to a _farm_?"

"How should I know? That's where my mom keeps bringing my puppies; clearly they're hot vacation spots!"

"I still don't understand why she would leave all of the sudden without even _talking _to anyone," Spencer frowned. "I mean I know she's bummed out over Carly moving, but we all are. She still has us."

"Was anything else bothering her?" Gibby asked.

"I don't think so," Freddie said.

"Well, did she seem down when she went up with you and Carly earlier?" Spencer questioned.

"Huh?" Freddie frowned.

"You know," Spencer said. "About ten minutes before Carly left with my dad, Sam came by and asked where Carly was, and I told her she was probably up her room, and I just assumed you were up there too, saying goodbye."

"Wait a minute," Freddie said. "Around that time I was up in the studio with Carly. And then we came right down with her bags; Sam never came to say anything to Carly."

"Huh, that's weird," Spencer shrugged. "I guess she went up to Carly's room, saw it was empty, and then came back down here. You would think she'd have checked the studio first."

'Yeah, I know," Freddie shrugged. "But I guess she wasn't thinking clearly. Anyway, do you think maybe we should try calling her mom or-"

Suddenly, though, his eyes grew wide. "Oh no."

"What?" Gibby asked. "What's up?"

"I think Sam did go to the studio, looking for Carly," Freddie said slowly.

"Yeah…and?" Spencer said.

"And…And I think she might've seen-but why would she…unless…no. No!"

"What?" Spencer said loudly.

"When Carly and I were up in the studio," Freddie explained. "We sort of…we kissed."

"_Kissed_?" Spencer exclaimed, jumping up.

"It-It was just a goodbye thing," Freddie said quickly. "But…But that still doesn't explain why Sam left!"

"Are you insane? Of course it does!" Spencer said.

"Why would she leave Seattle just because she saw Carly and I kiss?" Freddie asked.

"Dude, use your brain, will you?" Spencer said.

"Yeah," Gibby nodded. "I _told _you at the mall that she had been acting nicer to you lately!"

"Are you two saying that-that Sam still-that she-that she really _does _still like me?" Freddie asked hesitantly.

"Um, I may be a wacky man-child who is prone excessive burning and gets stuck to things frequently, but I know how to read teenage girls; I've lived with one for years!" Spencer said. "And from what I could tell, Sam still had _some _feelings for you."

"So when Sam saw Freddie kissing Carly…" Gibby said.

"-She thought it was a real kiss, and-and that I was into her that way again," Freddie finished softly.

"Oh man…this isn't good," Spencer sighed.

"So she left because of me?" Freddie asked shakily. He looked up at Gibby and Spencer, and he could tell that they were trying hard to keep from nodding; to confirming that he had in fact run her out of town with his carelessness.

He couldn't even manage to feel somewhat excited about the fact that Sam did actually like him still, as he had hoped, because what did it matter when he had lost her? Lost her _and _broken her heart.

"What do I do?" Freddie asked, feeling desperate. "Spence…how do I fix this?"

Spencer was almost a father figure in his life, not having a dad of his own around. He had always been there to help him out with girl problems and the sort, so naturally, Spencer would be able to help him now.

But Spencer looked just as lost as he was.

"I-I don't know," Spencer replied sadly.

Freddie sunk down onto the couch, putting his face in his hands. How could he have let this happen?


	347. Chapter 347

**AN-For the purpose of this fic, Gibby's restaurant still exists. I don't know what happened to it on the show, but it was never mentioned again, so I'm assuming it shut down.**

_Submarine_

"Gibby, did you even read the book?" Freddie frowned, looking over the book report he was proofreading for his friend.

"Yeah," Gibby nodded. "It was a good read. A real page turner."

"Right," Freddie sighed, sipping his smoothie. "Then why did you refer to _One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest _as a birdwatcher's dream novel?"

"Because it talks about cuckoos and nests," Gibby shrugged.

"They _never _mention cuckoos or nests!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Looks like _someone _didn't read the book carefully enough," Gibby said, raising an eyebrow at Freddie.

"But you-fine," Freddie conceded, handing Gibby's report back to him. He pulled out his phone. "Hey, do you still want to try and catch that movie?"

"Nah, I need to get home to my cat," Gibby said. He started to get up, but then seemed to have a thought, and sat back down. "Hey, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure," Freddie nodded. "What's up?"

"Well you know that saying? That girls are mean to guys they like?" Gibby asked. "Do you think that's true?"

"Well in some cases, yeah," Freddie agreed. "Why?"

"Just wondering," Gibby said quickly, getting to his feet. "Alright, now I really need to run. My cat hates it when I'm late and he has to reschedule. See you, dude!"

"Later," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. He finished off the last of his smoothie. He didn't think he'd ever fully understand Gibby.

…

"Hey, Gib," Carly smiled the next day after school as her and Sam climbed down to the basement, where Gibby was wiping down the counter of his restaurant.

"Oh hey you guys," Gibby said.

"Any hot meat sandwiches left?" Sam asked.

"I think there's one left from the batch you made for our lunch crowd in the fridge," Gibby said.

"Sweet!" Sam grinned, hurrying over to the refrigerator.

"So you're coming over tonight to go over tomorrow's iCarly, right?" Carly asked.

"I get to wear my eye patch, right?" Gibby questioned.

"If you insist on being an astronaut with an eye patch, then sure," Carly sighed.

"Awesome!"

"Hey, why are your socks in fridge?" Sam asked, holding up a pair of navy blue dress socks.

"Because I have this weird wart on the bottom of my foot," Gibby explained. "And I was thinking if I could freeze it off, then-"

"Gross! I don't want to hear about your weird foot issues!" Sam snapped, hurling Gibby's socks over to him.

"Well, I'm gonna get going," Carly said. "You coming, Sam?"

"Nah, I'm going to make some red pepper lemonade for tomorrow," Sam said.

"I still don't understand why you guys will drink _that _but you'll never have any of my special lemonade," Carly frowned. "Hey, if you want, I could swing by here tomorrow morning before class and make a batch for your lunch menu."

"Um, that's okay Carls," Sam said quickly. "I'll see you tonight."

"Yeah, yeah," Carly said, rolling her eyes as she started back up stairs.

"So hey, I was talking to some kids in detention yesterday, and I think I came up with a cool new idea to make us even more money with this place," Sam told Gibby as she began to mix the lemonade.

"We're gonna put in a karaoke system and let me sing soothing songs to our customers while they eat?" Gibby asked excitedly.

"That would hurl us into bankruptcy," Sam said coldly. "No, see in detention, they never let you bring in any snacks or anything, so halfway through, everyone's always starving. So what I was thinking was that we make like, a secret delivery service so we can sneak food to kids in there without the teacher seeing. I could distract the teacher or something, and then you could run in and give the kid his food. We'd charge them double, obviously."

"Nice," Gibby grinned. "But can I be the distraction? My mom tells me I'm pretty good at that."

"Sure, whatever," Sam shrugged. She finished mixing the lemonade. "Hey, I'm gonna run back up to my locker real quick and get some new salt shakers I 'picked up'. I'll be back in a minute."

"Hey, wait, can I ask you something first?" Gibby said quickly.

"What's up?" Sam shrugged.

"Are you busy this Saturday night?"

"Nah, I'm meeting with my mom's parole officer in the afternoon, but then I've got nothing," Sam replied.

"Well do you wanna come over to my place? Maybe order some pizza and watch a movie? My mom can make her famous strawberries and cream."

"Um, okay," Sam said. "But we never hang out at your place. What's wrong with Carly's?"

"Nothing," Gibby said. "But I was thinking it could just be me and you."

"Me and you?" Sam repeated.

"Yeah," Gibby nodded. "You know, like a date."

"A-A date?" Sam stuttered, her eyes widening.

"Uh-huh," Gibby said. "So you in?"

"Um…let-let me get back to you on that," Sam said quickly, turning towards the stairs and running up them.

….

"Oh man, would you look at that?" Spencer said longingly, looking at the T.V. screen. "I want it!"

"Want what?" Freddie asked, looking over from the kitchen table, where him and Carly were working on their homework.

"This submarine!" Spencer said. "Look at it! It has a periscope and everything!"

"What would you do with a submarine?" Carly chuckled.

"Um, I would explore the ocean depths," Spencer replied. "Duh!"

"You said you would explore the ocean with that boat you got too," Freddie pointed out.

"Yeah, and you wound up selling it to a suspicious looking pirate for five hundred bucks," Carly nodded.

"Why do you think he was suspicious?" Spencer asked.

"Because he was wearing a fake beard and said he needed the boat because he had to 'take care of someone'!"

Just then the door slammed open and Sam rushed in.

"Oh, hey Sam," Carly said. "I thought you were helping Gibby in the restaurant."

"Sam? Willingly help out?" Freddie scoffed. "Please, she probably just ate all the leftovers and left."

"Shut it, Benson," Sam snapped. She turned to Carly. "Carly? A word?"

"Yeah, just hold on for a minute," Carly said. "I only have two more math problems left and-"

"Now!" Sam said, grabbing her best friends wrist and pulling her over to the stairs.

"What?" Carly frowned. "What's going on?"

"After you left the restaurant," Sam told her, lowering her voice. "Gibby…asked me something."

"What? Did he want you to give him his bike back?" Carly asked. "Because I _told _you he'd notice it was gone and-"

"No!" Sam hissed. "He-He asked me to come over to his house Saturday night…Just me."

"Really?" Carly said. "Well that's sort of weird, I guess, but I don't-"

"He said it would be a date," Sam added.

"What?!"

"Shh!"

"He-He asked you out on a _date_?" Carly whispered. "Well what did you say?"

"Um…well, I-I panicked, okay?" Sam sighed. "I told him I'd get back to him, and then I came over here."

"Sam! You can't just ditch him like that," Carly said.

"Well I didn't know what to say," Sam moaned. "I mean I know I'm sort of vicious, but I'm not heartless! I didn't want to just turn the kid down right away!"

"So you're saying you _don't _want to go on a date with Gibby then?" Carly asked.

"Of course not! It's Gibby!"

"Okay, well, you'll just have to let him down easy then," Carly said. "I mean, Gibby's a tough kid…sort of. I'm sure he'll understand. I'll help you figure out what to say in a little bit, okay?"

"Okay, thanks," Sam nodded.

"So," Freddie said as the girls returned to the table. "Are you going to explain your little freak out there? Or am I just going to never know?"

"Mind your own business, Fredgrub," Sam said, grabbing the bowl of grapes that sat on the table.

"Gibby asked Sam out!" Carly blurted.

"Carly!" Sam exclaimed. "You couldn't even last five seconds?"

"I'm sorry, but it's big news, and you know I can't keep big news bottled up!" Carly defended.  
"Wait…" Freddie said slowly, looking quite shocked. "Gibby actually asked you out? Like on a _date_?"

"Yeah," Sam mumbled.

"_Why_?"

Sam frowned. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Just that you're so…you," Freddie chuckled, popping a grape into his mouth.

"Freddie," Carly said, giving him a look.

"So what? You think I'm just completely repulsive to guys?" Sam asked.

"He didn't mean that," Carly said quickly. "Right Freddie?"

"Yeah, I just mean that Gibby actually _knows _you," Freddie nodded.

"Oh no," Carly mumbled.  
"Knows me?" Sam repeated.

"Yeah, he knows how demanding, loud, crazy, and _abnormal _you can be," Freddie shrugged. "And he _saw _what happened when I went out with you last year. Why that kid would want to go-"

"Stop talking!" Carly hissed, kicking him under the table.

"Oh, so the only guys who could possibly be interested in me are the ones who don't know me, is that it?" Sam said hotly. "And then once they _do _get to know me, they should just dump me?"

"No, Sam, don't think-" Carly began, but Sam had already gotten to her feet, and was storming towards the door.

"Where are you going?" Carly asked.

"Back to the restaurant," Sam snapped. "To tell Gibby I'd be _delighted _to go on a date with him this Saturday."

"But I thought-" Carly started, but Sam had already slammed the door shut.

Carly turned to Freddie, glaring at him. "Dude! What was _that_?"

"What was what?" Freddie asked innocently.  
"You were a total jerk to her!"

"What? No I wasn't," Freddie said.

"You basically told her that she was a horrible choice for any guy to date!" Carly snapped. She looked over at Spencer. "Spencer! Don't you think Freddie was totally out of line?"

"Huh?" Spencer asked, looking up from the T.V. "What happened?"

"Did you just miss everything that happened?" Carly frowned.

"I was watching my submarine!"

"Well Gibby asked Sam out," Carly told him. "And when he found out, Freddie here says 'why would Gibby want to date you?' to her!"

"Whoa!" Spencer said. "Not cool!"

"I was just giving my opinion," Freddie said.

"No! You were just being a jerk!" Carly snapped.

"Oh come on, Sam says stuff like that to me all the time," Freddie pointed out. "Remember that one girl who came up to me at school last week and thought that I looked hot? She said that there had to be something wrong with her!"

"But you know she was just giving you a hard time," Carly said. "She didn't actually mean to imply that you were unattractive to girls."

"Yes she did!"

"No, she didn't," Carly said firmly. "I know Sam."

"Oh, so it's okay for her to say those things to me? But when I say them, I get put on trial?" Freddie said angrily, pushing his chair back.

"You know Sam's sensitive about anything to do with dating," Carly said. "At least you _should _know that."

"I'm out of here," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

He sped out of the Shay's apartment, fuming into his own apartment.

"Stupid Gibby," he mumbled, throwing his backpack down on his bed forcefully.

What was Gibby doing, asking out Sam like that? Since when did he like her? But then again, who _cared _when he started to like her! It didn't matter to him! He just hoped Gibby had enough money saved to keep up Sam's enormous appetite, and wouldn't care about having to go see the goriest movie in the dang theatre and then, just as he was starting to get past his squeamishness about all the blood and actually getting pretty interested in the movie, not even getting to see the end because Sam would insist on making out!

Well, actually, that last one wasn't that bad…not bad at all. In fact, it was the thing he would look forward to most about going to the movies with Sam, and now whenever he would go to the movies, he'd feel strangely bored during the film.

But still! Gibby didn't know what he was getting himself into, staring to date-

"Oh who am I kidding," Freddie mumbled, laying back on his bed. He wasn't mad right now because he thought Sam was going to destroy Gibby…He was upset because right now it looked like Gibby was getting what he wanted more than anything.

"What kind of friend goes out with a friend's ex anyway?" Freddie muttered. "That's rule number one in the guy handbook!"

"Is it?"

Freddie bolted up and saw Carly standing at his doorway.

"When'd you get here?" he frowned.

"A few minutes ago," Carly said, sitting down next to him on his bed. "I _was _going to yell at you some more for what you said to Sam, but I think you're making yourself suffer nicely on your own."

"Well it's not right!" Freddie exclaimed. "You don't date a friend's ex! Even Gibby should know that! What if Sam decided to ask out one of _your _ex-boyfriends?"

"Well I don't think it would bother me too much," Carly said. "That is…unless I still had feelings for him." She glanced over at Freddie, who was looking down at his lap.

"Oh, Freddie," Carly said gently.

"Just…don't, okay?" Freddie sighed. He got up and sat down by his window, looking out at the fire escape. "Why would she even agree to go out with him?"

"Well she wasn't going to," Carly told him.

"Huh?"

"Yeah, when she told me, she was all ready to turn him down," Carly nodded. "But then after your little…episode, I guess she changed her mind."

"Are you _serious_?"  
"She probably wants to prove you wrong about what you said about her," Carly said.

Freddie cursed himself in his head.

"Look," Carly said. "You should talk to Gibby about this-"

"Oh I am _going _to!"

"Calmly," Carly said. "Just-Just tell him that you may still have feelings for Sam, and that it's a little unnerving for you to watch him, your best friend, dating her."

"I'm not going to tell him _that_!" Freddie scoffed. "I'm going to go over there right now and-and hitting him! Yeah, I went there!"

"Gibby would destroy you in a fight," Carly sighed.

"Why does everyone keep saying that?"

"Freddie, Gibby-Gibby technically didn't do anything wrong," Carly reasoned. "Yes, I know it's frowned upon to go after your friend's ex, but you need to remember its been over a year since you and Sam dated. Gibby had every right to ask her out if he started to like her."

"He most certainly did _not_!"

"Yes, he did," Carly said firmly. "But I understand how hard this is for you. And if you want my opinion, I think Sam dating Gibby is just as weird as you do. But I don't think any relationship they have is going to go very far. I don't think you have to worry. So if you don't think you can talk to Gibby nicely, than maybe you should just wait and see if the two of them will de-couple on their own."

Freddie sighed. "You really think they won't last?"

"Sam's not going out with him for the right reasons right now," Carly said. "And I'll talk to her about that later. But no, I don't exactly think they have the right chemistry to be boyfriend and girlfriend."

"Okay," Freddie conceded. "Hopefully you're right…maybe their date on Saturday will be a total flop."

….

"Unbelievable!" Spencer said angrily, hanging up his phone Saturday night.

"What is?" Carly asked, looking up from her Pearpad.

"Dad won't try and get me one of the old submarines from his military base!"

"Um…I'm sorry?"

"So am I!" Spencer exclaimed, starting towards his room.

"What are you doing?" Carly called after him.

"Canceling my order for a submarine t-shirt!"

Carly rolled her eyes, amused at her older brother.

Just then the front door opened and Sam walked in.

"Hey," she sighed, throwing her jacket on the floor.

"Hey," Carly said as her best friend sat down next to her. "So how was it?"

"Let's see…awkward? Weird? Unnatural?" Sam said, falling back in her seat.

"You mean you didn't fall madly in love with Gibby?" Carly chuckled.

"It's not funny, Shay," Sam mumbled.

"Well what happened?"

"Nothing 'happened'," Sam explained. "We watched a movie, ate some pizza…it would've been fine I guess if we were just hanging out, but the fact that we were on a date made it seem so…icky."

"Well are you surprised?" Carly pointed out. "I mean, it's Gibby. He's a sweet guy and all, but I don't know _how _he's so successful with girls."

"Me neither," Sam nodded.

"So," Carly grinned. "Did he kiss you goodnight?"

Sam gave her a look.

"Oh come on! I spent my entire Saturday night playing Sugar Slam! I need details!"

"He tried," Sam said. "But I did that thing where I turned my head at the exact right second and he only got my cheek…which I need to remember to sterilize later."

"Well then you need to tell Gibby that you two should stay just friends…or whatever you were before," Carly said. "It's not fair to keep leading Gibby on like this if you don't really like him."

"I know," Sam said. "I'll call him later tonight and-"

But then the front door opened again, and Freddie walked in.

"Oh, you're here," he said, trying to sound nonchalant, but Carly knew he had probably been staring out his peephole, watching for Sam to come over.

"Yeah, is that a crime?" Sam spat.

"No," Freddie shrugged, sitting down. "So…you have a nice time on your date with _Gibby_? Did you eat his entire kitchen?"

"Um, Freddie?" Carly frowned. "What are you-"

"As a matter of fact, Gibby and I had a _great _time!" Sam snapped.

"Well maybe _one _of you did," Freddie mumbled.

Carly glared at him. What was this boy doing?

"You know what? I don't need to listen you run your fat mouth," Sam said, getting up. "I'm going to go call Gibby right now and tell him what an awesome time I had with him. _He_ actually knows how to give a girl a good date!"

Carly waited until Sam disappeared upstairs before she swatted Freddie's shoulder. "What the heck, dude! You were back to being a total sleaze to her again!"

"I know," Freddie moaned. "I just couldn't help it! She looked all dolled up from her date, and it was the only thing I could think to do."

"Well if you keep this up, you're only going to drive her closer to Gibby," Carly warned.

"Gibby…" Freddie growled, clenching his fists. He got up and headed to the door.

"Where are you going?" Carly asked.

"To Gibby's!" Freddie replied moodily. He slammed the door shut after him.

"Well," Carly said to herself. "This is going to get fighty…"

…

Freddie stomped up the front steps of the Gibson's house, still fuming. He pounded on the front door, his body fueled by anger.

"Oh, hey man," Gibby said brightly, opening the door. "I didn't know you were stopping by. Want some-"

"How could you do this to me? Huh?" Freddie exclaimed. "We're supposed to be bros! Bros don't do this to bros!"

"Whoa, easy there," Gibby said. "What'd I do? Wait. Is this the forty bucks I took from your locker?"

"No! Wait, what? Never mind!" Freddie snapped. "That wasn't what I was talking about! I mean you and Sam!"

"Oh, Sam," Gibby grinned. "Man, her and I just finished up one of the best dates in history. She's a real hot chick, you know."

"Of course I know! I dated her!" Freddie yelled. "She's my _ex-girlfriend_, which makes he off limits to you!"

"Why?" Gibby asked simply.

"Why? _Why? _Because it-it's a rule! That's why!"

"Dude, you haven't dated Sam in over a year," Gibby shrugged.

"That's irrelevant!" Freddie mumbled. "Since-Since when do you even like her?"

"I don't know, I guess it was us working together at my restaurant that really did it," Gibby reasoned. "Good food can really bring two people together."

"Well…you can't date Sam anymore," Freddie said boldly, crossing his arms over his chest.

Gibby raised an eyebrow. "Um, I think that's up to her."

"You stop seeing her," Freddie said. "Or…I'll beat you up."

Gibby laughed. He laughed so hard that he had to grab the back of his catch to steady himself.

"It's not funny!" Freddie cried, annoyed. "I-Oh forget it!"

He turned and stomped out of the house.

…

Sam sighed as she headed down to the basement of Ridgeway Monday morning. She had to break it off with Gibby. As much as she would love to keep a guy around to try and prove Freddie wrong about her datibilty, she knew it wasn't fair to Gibby. Besides, this whole thing was starting to freak her out.

"Hey!" Gibby said brightly, looking up from the meatballs he was brewing. "I missed you yesterday, I thought we were gonna look at my baby pictures together with my mom."

"Yeah…I was sick," Sam lied lamely. "Um, listen Gib. We need to talk."

"About the price of our garlic bread basket, right?" Gibby nodded.

"No, not-not exactly," Sam said. "So, um, you're sort of-I guess-"

"Sam!" Freddie suddenly exclaimed, running downstairs. He looked over at Gibby and narrowed his eyes.

"Gibby," he said coldly.

"Hey, what's up, dude?" Gibby smiled, clearly not sensing the hostility in the other boy's voice.

"We need to talk," Freddie said, ignoring Gibby.

"Freddie!" called Carly, rushing down to join the other three. "Freddie, you can't just do this to-"

"Sam, you can't be with Gibby," Freddie said, cutting Carly off.

Sam crossed her arms. "Why? Because I'm such a horrible girlfriend? Because all I want to do is have guys buy me food? Because I'm not all fluffy and girly? Because I-"

"Because I still love you!" Freddie blurted out.

Sam closed her mouth, staring at him in complete astonishment.

"I-I didn't mean any of those things I said about you before," Freddie sighed. "Any guy would want to date you. You're beautiful, you're amazing, you-you're just _everything_. I guess I just-knowing you were starting to date another guy, even if it was Gibby, just made me snap and say a lot of things that weren't true. And these past few days have _been _killing me, because _I _want to be with you."

"I-I-" Sam stammered.

Freddie turned to Gibby. "I'm sorry. This is completely inappropriate of me to be doing this to you. Carly tried to stop me, but-I'm crazy about Sam, Gib. But, if-if you two are really happy together, I-I guess I can just-"

"Oh just kiss her already!" Gibby said, wiping the corner of his eyes with his collar. "This is all just too beautiful!"

"Wait," Sam said, looking over at Gibby. "So you're saying-"

"We're done, be with Freddie," Gibby said. He grabbed Carly's jacket that she was holding in her hands and blew his nose on it. "Oh man, I'm blubbering up more than when Jake broke up with Courtney on _The Mistress_!"

Sam looked back up at Freddie. "You-You were really jealous of me and Gibby?"

"I'd be jealous of you and anyone," Freddie told her.

Sam gave him a small smile. "The only reason I was with him was to try and get you to stop thinking of me as some monster girlfriend. Because when you said all those things, it made me think that-that you would _never _want to get back together with me."

"I never thought you were a monster girlfriend," Freddie said earnestly. "And-And like I said, I'm sorry I said those things. But when you're so fueled by jealousy, I guess you don't really have to much of a filter, and things just-"

Sam cut off his speech by standing on her toes and gently pressing her lips to his.

"Aw," Carly smiled.

When the two broke apart, they turned back to their friends.

"So, um…we're gonna go now," Sam said.

"Here, take this love Danish I made," Gibby said, shoving a large pastry into Freddie's arms.

"Er, thanks," Gibby said.

"Hey," Carly said, looking at the pastry. "Why's there-"

"Go on, get out of here you crazy kids," Gibby urged the new couple.

Carly waited until Sam and Freddie were gone, and then she turned to Gibby. "Um, Gib? You just happened to have that pastry lying around, right?"

"Yeah, it's an extra one I ordered for the desert menu today," Gibby nodded.

"Right," Carly said. "So why did it have an S and an F written in frosting on it?"

"Oh all right," Gibby said, beaming proudly. "You caught me, Carly."

"Caught you doing what, exactly?" Carly frowned.

"I," Gibby said. "Successfully recoupled that couple."

"What?" Carly frowned. "Wait a minute! Are you telling me-You _planned _this whole thing?"

"That's right," Gibby grinned.

"So-So you never wanted to date Sam?"

"No," Gibby told her. "But I knew if Freddie thought I did, he'd get all jealous and finally become dude enough to pull himself together and get back with Sam on his own."

"So-So you-but how-" Carly stammered. "That's-That's brilliant. I don't believe this…I was out meddled by _Gibby_!"

"Feels good, doesn't it?" Gibby said. "Beat you to it!"

"Well, you better make sure you at least let Sam and Freddie in on your little plan," Carly mumbled. "Because Freddie was ready to kill you for dating Freddie."

"Eh, I'll tell them later," Freddie shrugged. "Besides, everyone knows I could take Freddie in a fight."

"Yes, we all know that," Carly said, still bitter about the fact the she couldn't take credit for getting her two best friends back together. "Hey! I just thought of something? How did you know Sam would agree to go out with you? Huh? If she had said no, your whole little plot would've gone up in flames. Now, see a carefully formulated plan, something _I _would've come up with, would've taken care of any problems like that."

"It wasn't a problem," Gibby shrugged. "What girl would reject _Gibby_?"

"Um…yeah, okay," Carly said, rolling her eyes.


	348. Chapter 348

**AN-Hey, so this is just something I wanted to say really quick. I mean this in the politest way possible; I don't want it seem like an angry rant or anything. First, thank you guys so much for the reviews and feedback and requests that you all have been sending me. I love hearing your ideas and what you think of my chapters. But at the same time, I totally get that there are some chapters that not everybody likes, for whatever reason. I'm fine with that. No story is perfect, and constructive criticism is always welcomed. In fact, I ENJOY hearing what I need to improve on, because it helps me get stronger as a writer. But simply saying that the story is a 'silly stupid excuse for a story' and is 'crappy trash', doesn't really tell me what's wrong with it. Again, I'm not upset or disheartened over reading those comments in my reviews ( I mean, after reading all of the great reviews that you guys have been leaving me, how can I be? Lol) nor am I saying that I want only nice, sweet, positive reviews for this story (even though those are always nice to read). But if you think that a chapter wasn't very good or lacked something, please tell me, whether through a review or a PM or whatever, what exactly it was about it that you didn't like so that way I can make sure the next chapter is better:) **

**I love writing this story, and I appreciate all the support you all have been giving it. I didn't write this AN to call anyone out, or anything like that. My only purpose in writing this was to let you all know that you can communicate with me if you see something that can be improved on in this story, and that I'm open to that. Sorry that this was so long, just wanted to get that out there:) So anyway, onto the oneshot!**

…**..**

_Mustard_

"Wow," Carly grinned, opening the door of the apartment her and Sam shared, looking at Freddie and Gibby, who were standing outside. "Don't you two look all spiffy?"

"Thanks," Freddie said as him and Gibby entered the apartment. "We didn't know what to wear exactly."

"I thought you and Gibby were just having a guys night," Carly frowned as the three of them headed into the kitchen, where Sam was sitting at the table, squirting mustard on crackers.  
"They are," Sam said, giving Freddie a quick kiss. "They're going out to a club."

"A club?" Carly repeated. "You two?"

"Hey! What's so surprising about that?" Gibby frowned.

"Nothing," Carly said quickly. "It's just, well, you know, the two of you seem more like 'stay home and watch T.V. guys'."

"Um, Gibby and I happen to be very hip_, _hot, _studs_," Freddie defended. "If we want to tackle the party scene, we'll tackle the party scene."

"They're mad because when we were at the Pottery Barrel, the saleslady tried to sell them this new cologne," Sam grinned. "What was it…Tame Tide?"

"We'll show you," Gibby said confidently. "We're Foxy Fellow cologne guys."

"Why are your nails so shiny?" Carly asked.

"Oh, I just got them buffed," Gibby said.

"What wild freaks," Sam chuckled, wrapping her arms around Freddie.

"Ha, ha," Freddie said dryly. "You're just jealous that you and Carly aren't invited out on guys night."

"Yeah," Carly said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "All we have is the complete fourth season of _Lifeguard Palazzo _on DVD and a fridge full of junk food."

"How will we _ever _enjoy ourselves watching hot shirtless guys and stuffing our face with pizza?" Sam smirked.

"Oh, so you're allowed to drool over lifeguards, but you flip out when I said that Princess Ablogata looked nice in her Robe of Curiosity," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"I did not _flip out_," Sam snapped.

"You threw a pickle at me!"

"Oh just go on your stupid little guys night!" Sam said.

"Yeah, we'd better get going," Freddie said to Gibby, looking at his phone.

"Oh yeah, we're stopping for cupcakes on the way," Gibby nodded.

"Have fun, you two," Carly chuckled.

"Bring me back some cupcakes!" Sam called after them.

Once the door closed behind the boys, Carly turned to her best friend. "Hey? You sure you're okay with your boyfriend going to a club without you?"

"Yeah," Sam shrugged. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know," Carly said. "It's just…you know. Clubs can get pretty wild sometimes."

"Yeah, but he's _Freddie_, and he's going with _Gibby_," Sam pointed out. "Come on. The two of them will be there for an hour, realize they hate the place, and then spend the rest of their night painting paperweights at Color Me Pot! Trust me, Carls. I'm not worried at all."

…

"I think my eardrums are going to explode!" Freddie yelled, plugging his ears as he tried to talk to Gibby, who was standing right next to him.

"What?" Gibby yelled back.

"Never mind!" Freddie sighed.

Him and Gibby had been at the club for no less than twenty minutes, and he was already ready to go. He didn't want to dance, it was becoming very hot and sweaty, and he was pretty sure he would be deaf by morning. It looked like he really wasn't the clubbing type of guy. Not that he was surprised.

"Hey! I love this song!" Gibby suddenly exclaimed as the music changed. "You wanna go dance?"

"Nah," Freddie said. "You go ahead."

"Okay, well, here, let's take a pic first, smile!" He pulled out his digital camera and took a quick picture of him and Freddie.

"_Why'd _you bring that?" Freddie moaned.

"To get pictures for my online scrapbook!" Gibby said. "Duh!"

Freddie rolled his eyes as he headed over towards the bar, where he spotted an empty seat.

"What can I get you?" the barman asked, coming over to Freddie.

"Just a ginger ale, please," Freddie said.

"Ginger ale?" the barman frowned. "Plain?"

"Yeah, see, I drove my friend and I here," Freddie explained. "So I don't want to risk-Okay you're gone."

He pulled out his phone. As pathetic as it might sound to some of the alpha males swarming around the club, he would much rather be at home with his girlfriend right now, playing a round of Battleship. He wondered if it would look bad if he stepped outside just for a minute to call Sam…

But before he could even decide whether or not to do so, a group of girls passed him, all cheering and wooing about who knew what. As the girl at the back of the pack passed, him, though, she tripped in her high heels and tumbled right into Freddie.

"Whoa, you okay there?" Freddie asked, catching the girl quickly.

"Oh my God! That was _so _scary!" the girl giggled, not moving from Freddie's lap. "I thought I was going to _fall_! But I didn't because _you _caught me!"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded, laughing uncomfortably.

Just then, there was a bright camera flash that nearly blinded him.

"Gibby!" Freddie snapped as his best friend approached.

"What? It was good lighting over here,' Gibby defended. He looked down at the girl on Freddie's lap. "Hey, who's she?"

"I don't know! She just fell on me!" Freddie hissed, trying to help the girl to her feet, but she seemed very intent on staying right on Freddie's lap.

"Hey," she whispered, leaning close to his ear. "Want to head to the VIP lounges upstairs? They have _couches _we can sit on and-"

"Um, listen, you seem, er, very nice and all, but I have a girlfriend, who I love very much," Freddie said, finally succeeding in getting the girl off of him. "So why don't I help you back over to your friends, and you can-"

"Oh my God! Danielle!" the girl squealed, apparently spotting someone she knew among the crowd, forgetting all about Freddie. "I love your shoes!"

"Hey, I'm totally down for staying here if you want to, but I got to say, this isn't as fun as I thought it would be," Freddie said to Gibby.

"I know, let's get out of here," Gibby nodded. "I asked the DJ if he would play the Macarena and he told me to get lost or bring him some watermelon! Like I'd bring _any _melons to a guy who keeps me from unleashing my Macarena!"

"So…" Freddie said as they started towards the exit. "Color Me Pot?"

"You bet!"

….

"Morning," Carly said brightly the next morning as Sam came into the kitchen, yawning. "I made cinnamon buns. Fresh from the tube!"

"Sweet," Sam said, pouring herself a cup of coffee.

"Man," Carly said, scrolling through her Splashface page on her laptop. "You should see how Rona Burger's doing. She just changed her profile picture. Apparently since high school she's gained forty pounds, bleached her hair and stopped waxing her upper lip…is it bad that I'm happy about this?"

"Nah, that just means I'm finally working my way into your sense of humor," Sam grinned.

"Oh my God," Carly sighed.

"What?"

"Gibby uploaded a new album to his online scrapbook a few minutes ago," Carly said. "He actually documented their little club trip last night."

"What's _wrong _with that kid?" Sam asked, shaking her head as she sat down next to Carly.

"Who knows," Carly said, clicking on the album. "But let's see how much of a 'club stud' he and Freddie are. Aw, here's a picture of the two of them. And here's one of what looks like Gibby doing the Macarena on the dance floor. Oh, and here's one of what looks like Gibby getting booed for doing the Macarena on the dance floor. Here's one of Gibby in the guy's bathroom…classy. And then there's Freddie and-oh."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Sam exclaimed, her eyes widening as she looked at the picture of a tall dark-haired woman wearing a very short black dress sitting on her boyfriend's lap. "What is _this_?"

"Um, maybe-maybe she just, um, was complementing Freddie on his belt or something," Carly reasoned.

"By _sitting _on him?"

"I know it seems like an odd way to do it, but maybe it's the next big thing, and-"

"Oh, I am going to _kill _that nub!" Sam fumed, furiously biting into her cinnamon bun.

…..

"Hey!" Freddie said brightly later that day, letting himself into Carly and Sam's apartment.

"Well, I'm out of here," Carly said quickly, grabbing her bag and heading towards the door. She stopped and leaned up to Freddie's ear.

"You're a dead man," she whispered.

"Huh?" Freddie frowned.

"Bye!" Carly said, rushing out of the apartment.

"Hey, baby," Sam smiled, giving him a long kiss. "How was the club last night?"

"It was…fun," Freddie said. "But hey look! I made you this ceramic pot."

"Aw, how sweet!" Sam said. "Oh, and while Carly and I were going through our DVDs last night, we found your _Galaxy Wars _trilogy you left over here."

"Oh, I've been wondering where that was," Freddie said.

"Why don't we watch it?" Sam suggested.

"You want to watch nine hours of _Galaxy Wars_?" Freddie asked in surprise.

"Sure," Sam shrugged. "Last time we watched a movie together, I picked it, so it's only fair for you to have a turn this time, right?"

"Well, um, yeah I guess," Freddie nodded.

"Great," Sam said happily. "You put the DVD in, and I'll go make us some popcorn."

"Sounds good," Freddie said.

As his girlfriend disappeared into the kitchen, Freddie headed over to the T.V., where he immediately spotted his DVD set sitting on the television stand.

"Hello old friend," Freddie grinned. He opened up the DVD case, about to take one of the discs, out, but instead, he was met with a surprise.

The entire inside of the DVD case was plastered with pictures. The same pictures…

Freddie gasped. It was of him and that girl who had fallen on him last night! But how could these have gotten in here? Had _Sam _seen them? Oh man, if she did…

"Popcorn's ready," Sam said sweetly returning to the room with a bag of popcorn.

"Um…Sam? Baby?" Freddie began. "Where-Where are my _Galaxy Wars _discs?"

"They aren't in the case?" Sam asked innocently. "Huh, that's weird."

"Yeah…weird," Freddie nodded. "So, um, do you happen to know where they are?"

"Of course I do. I hid them."

"You _hid _them?" he exclaimed.

"Yeah, in the same spot I'll use to hide your dead body in about five minutes," Sam snapped, crossing her arm, her falsely sweet voice disappearing. "Talk. Who is she?"

"Sam, I-I can explain-" Freddie began weakly.

"Yeah? I doubt it," Sam frowned. "So what? You and Gibby decide to go out clubbing and you pick up the first bimbo in a tiny dress you can find?"

"No!" Freddie said quickly. "It wasn't-"

"You know, Carly asked me if I was okay with you going to that stupid club," Sam spat. "And I gave her this whole little speech about how I knew you wouldn't do anything and that I wasn't worried. Well _obviously _I should've been worried!"

"Sam, that picture-I know it looks bad, but you have to understand that I wasn't cheating on you last night," Freddie said.

"So then _why _is there a hot chick on your lap?" Sam demanded. "Was she just _resting _there?"

"No! She _fell_!" Freddie told her.

"Fell?" Sam repeated, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes," Freddie sighed. "I was just sitting at the bar, being completely _miserable_, I might add, and this group of girls walked past and she tripped in her shoes or something and fell onto me."

"Oh," Sam mumbled. "Well…why's she look all happy?"

"The same reason all those people in that club were overly happy," Freddie shrugged. "And she even tried to get me to go up to a VIP lounge thing with her, but I refused right away because I told her I had a _beautiful _girlfriend already who I _loved_."

Sam didn't say anything.

"Sam, I'd never cheat on you," Freddie told her gently. "I'd never even _think_ about it."

"I-I know," Sam sighed. "I'm sorry…I guess. It's just, you know, when I saw that picture…"

"It's cool," Freddie told her, wrapping his arms around her. He leaned down and kissed her. "And hey," he added when they pulled apart. "Now we can enjoy our _Galaxy Wars _marathon!"

"Pfft, you thought I was serious about that?" Sam scoffed. "I already watched those lame movies with you last month for our anniversary, that's all you get from me!"

"Well can you at least tell me where you hid the discs?" Freddie asked.

"Fine," Sam grinned, rolling her eyes. "They're in the _Lifeguard Palazzo _case."


	349. Chapter 349

**AN-Thanks so much for the love, you guys!**

_Harp_

"Hey, Spencer?" Carly asked, coming downstairs, where her older brother was working on a sculpture. "Have you seen my cute little black bag?"

"No, why?" Spencer asked. "I thought that was your fancy date-night bag."

"It is," Carly nodded.

"What?" Spencer exclaimed. "You got a date? No way! See, I told you if you were patient, some guy-"

"I'm not the one going on the date!" Carly snapped.

"Oh…well then why do you need that bag?"

"It's for Sam," Carly explained.

"Really? I didn't know she was seeing someone," Spencer said. "Good for her."

"Um, what do you mean you didn't know she was seeing anyone," Carly frowned. "You _do _know who she's going out with tonight, right?"

"Um, in case you forgot, _I'm _a busy adult," Spencer said. "I can't always keep up with all your teenage drama and love lives!"

"Sorry, I just assumed since you leave the apartment like, three times a week, you were up to date," Carly chuckled.

"Hey! I went with Socko to the junk yard this morning!" he defended. "Now hurry up and give me the deets on Sam's new dude!"

"Um, he's not exactly a _new _dude," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "It's _Freddie_."

"Freddie?" Spencer frowned. "But-But I thought that they broke up six months ago!"  
"Yeah, but they got back together a few weeks ago," Carly said. "Have you seriously not noticed?"

"No!" Spencer exclaimed. "How did they-Why did they-You didn't think to _mention _this?"

"I told you! I thought you knew!"

"Well I'm oblivious! There, I said it! You happy?"

"A little bit, actually," Carly smiled. "Anyway, I'm gonna go back up and try to find some cute dresses for Sam to borrow for tonight."

….

A few hours later, Spencer was still working on his sculpture. Just then there was a short knock at the door and Freddie walked in.

"Hey," he said. "Wow, that sculpture's looking great, Spence."

"Um, yeah, thanks," Spencer nodded.

"Anyway," Freddie continued. "Do you have a tie I could borrow for my date with Sam tonight?"

"Uh…possibly," Spencer frowned.

"You okay?" Freddie asked.

"Peachy!" Spencer said quickly.

"You sure?" Freddie said. "Because you're acting sort of-"

"Okay!" Spencer conceded. He set down the paintbrush he had been working with. "I just-do you know what you're doing?"

"What? You don't think I should wear a tie tonight?" Freddie said.

"No," Spencer sighed. "I'm talking about with Sam."

"With Sam?" Freddie repeated.

"Yeah," Spencer nodded. "You know, I just don't want to see you make the same mistakes that you did last time, now that you're back together."

"Well, I don't think we really made too many mistakes per say, last time," Freddie pointed out. "We just decided at the time we weren't really ready to deal with our contrasting personalities. But after a few months of being apart, we realized that's what we liked best about each other."

"Okay…" Spencer said hesitantly. "Just-Just don't hurt Sam again. When you two broke up, she didn't take it as well as she pretended, you know."

"What do you mean?" Freddie frowned.

"Um…I sort of swore I'd never tell you about it," Spencer said.

"But you just-"

"Do you want a tie or not?" Spencer exclaimed.

"Yes!"

"Well then go get one out of my closet!"

"Okay," Freddie said, giving Spencer a strange look.

As Freddie disappeared into Spencer's room, Sam came downstairs, wearing a navy blue dress and carrying Carly's black purse.

"Hey Spence," Sam said. "Fredwad here yet?"

"Um, yeah," Spencer nodded. "Listen, Sam. Can I talk to you first?"

"I guess," Sam shrugged. "Cool sculpture, by the way. What it is it? Some sort of platypus?"

"It's a dolphin!" Spencer said indignantly. "Can't you see the dorsal fin and-never mind!"

"So what did you want to talk about?" Sam laughed.

"You know what you're doing tonight, right?" Spencer asked.

"Yeah, I'm going to dinner with Freddie," Sam frowned.

"No, I mean…" Spencer sighed. "I just don't want you to get hurt again, with Freddie. Last time I know your break-up was mutual and all, but you still-"

"Hey, we agreed never to bring that up again!" Sam hissed.

"I wasn't!" Spencer said quickly. "But I just want to make sure that-that you've really thought this through, that you didn't get back together with him on a limb."

"We've been back together for three weeks," Sam pointed out. "And we're doing fine. Why didn't you give me this awkwardlecture _then_?"

"Because some of us were out of the loop!" Spencer snapped. Then his voice softened again. "I just hated seeing you all, you know...after you and Freddie broke up the first time, and I'd hate for you to have to go through that again."

"Hey, I'll be fine," Sam smiled.

"Okay, well-"

"Sam!" Freddie said, coming out of Spencer's room as he was tying a red tie around his neck. "Wow, you look amazing."

"Well Carly's been going crazy dolling me up for the past hour," Sam shrugged.

"Aw, you guys look adorable," Carly grinned, coming downstairs. "Don't they Spence?"

"Yeah…real adorable," Spencer nodded as Freddie put his arm around Sam.

"You guys are just going to that new restaurant, right?" Carly asked.

"Yeah, and then depending on what time we finish, we might try and catch a movie," Freddie said.

"Fredhead's got to be home by nine-thirty, otherwise Crazy will come looking for him and drag him home," Sam explained.

"I thought she finally agreed to let you stay out until ten," Carly frowned.

"She did," Freddie sighed. "But then she found out that Sam and I stayed up until three in the morning last week web chatting, so now it's back to nine thirty."

"You're lucky you're worth dealing with her," Sam smirked, giving Freddie a quick kiss.

"You know I'd deal with your own batty mom anytime," Freddie chuckled. He looked down at his watch. "Oh, we'd better get going, baby. If we're not at the restaurant at exactly seven, then they'll give away our table and who knows how long it will take for us to get those reservations again."

"Crab, then let's go," Sam said.

"Have fun!" Carly called after her best friends as they rushed out the door. She turned to Spencer. "Hey, do you mind keeping it down while you work on your sculpture? I'm supposed to be web chatting this cute guy, and hopefully, if everything goes right, I'll be the one using my date night bag next week, and-"

"Yeah, yeah, that's real nice," Spencer said quickly. "Do you know which restaurant Sam and Freddie are going to?"

"Um, The Moonlight Lounge," Carly replied. "But why-"

"Later!" Spencer cut her off, grabbing his jacket and running out of the apartment.

…

"Sir?" one of the waiters said to Spencer as he tried to walk back to the booths at The Moonlight Lounge. "Do you have a reservation?"

"Huh?" Spencer frowned. "Oh, no see I just wanted to stop by really quick and just check on another couple's date, and make sure that-"

"I'm sorry," the waiter said firmly. "But unless you have a reservation, I cannot allow you back there."

"Look," Spencer sighed. "I'm only going to be a minute. I just want to make sure that a teenage girl doesn't get her heart broken again by a well-meaning, but sometimes _stupid _teenage boy. See, I'm the older brother of their best friend, and I sort of consider myself the wise guardian of all of them, so if I could just take a quick peeksie, I'd really appreciate that."

"Aw, that's a touching story sir," the waiter said.

"So you'll let me go back now?"

"Absolutely not," the waiter said. "Now leave before I have you escorted out by restaurant security." He held up a walkie-talkie menacingly.

"But you just said-"

"Javier," the waiter began speaking into the walkie-talkie. "Bruce, we have a bit of a situation up-"

"I'm going! I'm going!" Spencer snapped.

As Spencer turned to leave, a waitress ran up to the waiter, looking frantic.

"Has the band arrived yet?" she asked.

"No! They were supposed to be here ten minutes ago!" the waiter snapped. "Oh, this is just awful!"

Spencer rolled his eyes as he headed out of the restaurant. He was about to go back to his car, when suddenly a white van pulled up.

"Come on people, let's move!" a man in a fancy tuxedo said, jumping out of the van and opening up the back, revealing several cellos, flutes, and a harp. "We're running late; we can't have those poor patrons eating without music in there! There is one thing that separates us from the animals, and that is fine dining!"

"Hmmm," Spencer said thoughtfully. "That could work…"

…

"I've got to say, I'm usually not a fan of fancy restaurants, because the food's weird and they barely feed you anything," Sam said, taking a bite of her chicken. "But this place is pretty good. Decent portions, normal food…nice choice, Freddicini."

"I thought you'd like it," Freddie grinned. "It's got all the elements of a classy restaurant combined with the elements of normal restaurants."

"Hey," Sam said, looking over towards a small stage, where a group of musicians was setting up. "This place even has music?"

"Yeah, they hired some classical music group to play tonight," Freddie nodded. "To make this night even more fancy."

"Nice," Sam grinned, clinking her glass to his.

"That harp player seems a little…off, though," Freddie commented, watching the heavily bearded harp player ungracefully heave his instrument onstage, straightening the dark sunglasses he was wearing.

"Eh, musicians are weird sometimes," Sam shrugged. "Like my cousin Joe who plays the banjos outside that sandwich shop in Connecticut."

"Yeah, well, I think there's more wrong with Joe than his banjos," Freddie chuckled. He took a sip of his water, still looking at Sam. "You know, I told you this earlier, but I'm just gonna say it again. You look _beautiful_."

"Thanks," Sam said, blushing. "You don't look bad either."

She leaned closer to him, their lips almost touching.  
"Hey!" a loud, strangely deep, voice, suddenly yelled, surprising them both. They looked up and saw the eccentric harp player at their table, leering down at them.

"Um, can we help you?" Freddie frowned.

"Do you two think it's _respectful_ to be engaging in _lip activities_ in a five star restaurant?" he snapped.

"There's no rule against kissing here," Sam pointed out.

"There may not be a rule, but it's a common courtesy, missy!"

"Missy?" Sam repeated, confused.

"Hey, Craig?" the violinist called from the stage. "Are you ready or not? We have soothing music to play here!"

"I'm coming!" the harp player exclaimed. He turned back to Sam and Freddie. "I'm watching you two!"

"Okay…" Freddie said, shaking his head as the musician ran back on stage. "That was-"

"Bizarre?" Sam finished.

"A little bit, yep," Freddie nodded. "Let's just hope he plays better than he acts."

But as the band's conductor stepped up on the stage and the group began playing, it turned out that the harp player did not play any better than his odd behavior would suggest.

"Well," Sam said, cringing as the harp player played a particularly off note. "He sucks."

"What's wrong with that dude?" Freddie asked.

"No clue," Sam said. "But…I think he sort of looks familiar, don't you think?"

"A little, yeah," Freddie agreed. "You think maybe he's a hobo we passed on the street or something?"

"What hobo knows how to play the harp?" Sam chuckled.

"Um, clearly this guy doesn't know how to play the harp, so that's my point," Freddie said. "Anyway, I know we don't exactly have the most romantic music playing right now, but how about you and I still try and make the best of this date?"

"I could get with that," Sam grinned, leaning over to try and kiss her boyfriend.

"Hey! What'd I tell you two about the smooching?" the harp player bellowed, grabbing a roll from a nearby table and hurling it at the couple, hitting Freddie's square in the eye.

"Ow!" Freddie cried, clutching his eye.

"Are you okay?" Sam asked, looking at her boyfriend, concerned, but also taking a bite of the roll.

"No, not really!" Freddie mumbled. "I've got crumbs in my eyes!"

"Well maybe that will teach him about setting young girls up for heartbreak!" the harp player said, marching down towards the table.

"Craig!" the conductor snapped. "We're in the middle of a song! And might I say you were _awful-_"

"Dude, what's your deal?" Sam demanded.

"Yeah! Why'd you chuck bread at my face?" Freddie asked, annoyed.

"Because you don't need to be setting Sam up for something that's just going to hurt her later!" the harp player said harshly

"How'd you know my-" Sam began, but then she shook her head. She slowly stood up and pulled off the harp player's sunglasses and beard, revealing Spencer.

"Imposter!" the conductor exclaimed. "He's not Craig! Where is my harp player you fiend?"

"He's fine!" Spencer yelled, turning towards the stage. "He's safely locked away in the kitchen storage room!"

"Spencer?" Freddie frowned. "What are you-Why'd you-"

"I can explain," Spencer sighed.

"Don't bother," Sam muttered, glaring at the man as she got to her feet, heading towards the exit.

"Sam!" Freddie started, but Spencer ran after her before he could get out of the booth.

"Sam?" Spencer called, running after the girl as she stormed out of the restaurant. "Sam, listen, I-"

"What's you problem?" Sam frowned, crossing her arms. "Huh? Why'd you go to all that trouble just to ruin our date? Do you have a problem with me dating Freddie?"

"No," Spencer said. "Well…maybe."

"Why?" Sam demanded. "Do you not like him or something?"

"No! Of course I do," Spencer said. "I've known him for years, and he's a great kid-"

"So then why are you acting like a freak about me getting back together with him?"

"Because," Spencer explained. "I-I hate what he did to you when you two first broke up."

"Dude, it was mutual!" Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"I know," Spencer nodded. "But…he wasn't the one who I woke up to find sobbing on my couch at three A.M after it happened."

Sam looked down at her feet. "You promised you'd never bring that up again," she mumbled.

"And I haven't, not to Freddie or Carly or anyone," Spencer told her. "But I'd never seen you like that…and I knew that you were really hurting. You know I think of you as a second little sister, Sam."

Sam looked up. "You-You do?"

"Of course," Spencer nodded. "How could I not? You practically live at my place. And I care about you a lot, and if there is anything I could do to make sure you never have to feel what you did that one night, I'd do it. I guess that's why I came here to spy on you guys…"

Sam gave him a small smile. "Well…thanks for looking out for me then," she said softly. "I've never really had anyone do that for me before…but, I know what I'm doing with Freddie. We're not going to make the same mistakes we did before. And if we _do _wind up breaking up again…at least we'll both know we gave it our best shot this time. But now that me and Freddie took that break, I think we're really going to last awhile this time."

Spencer took a deep breath. "Okay…if you're sure you know what you're doing. But if you ever need someone, you know where to find me, right?"

"I think I can find my way over," Sam grinned.

Spencer laughed and pulled her into a hug.

"Hey, I should go in and apologize to Freddie," Spencer said when they pulled apart. "And how about I pick up the check for you guys?"

"Since when do you have the money to be buying fancy dinners?" Sam asked.

"Oh, the dude who I'm making my sculpture for right now paid me a fortune," Spencer said.

"Right, the platypus," Sam nodded.

"Dolphin!" Spencer exclaimed. "Seriously, _how _does my beautiful dolphin look _anything _like a flat, ugly old platypus?"


	350. Chapter 350

_Graph_

"A five hundred dollar parking ticket?" Spencer exclaimed angrily, storming into his apartment. "Five _hundred _dollars?"

"So…bad day?" Carly asked, looking up from her laptop.

"Clearly!"

"Well where'd you park that was so illegal?" Carly questioned.

"I just had to run into Pottery Barrel for like, ten minutes," Spencer explained. "But they were packed, so I couldn't find a spot. Then I saw the employee of the month parking spot was free, so I thought it wouldn't hurt if I just parked there really quick. But noooooo! When I came back out with my lemon zester and assorted pot holders, there was a mean old cop sticking a parking ticket right on my poor motorcycle!"

"Wait…how'd that cop know you weren't _really _the employee of the month at Pottery Barrel?" Carly frowned.

"He said I didn't look like employee of the month material!" Spencer snapped. "Can you believe that? He took my money _and _my dignity!"

"I'm sorry," Carly smiled. "But hey, there's some cake in the kitchen. That might make you feel better. I even put on that special frosting I make, to give it a special touch."

"Um…I-I'm good," Spencer said quickly. "I think I'm just gonna run a hot bath and try to forget about my _terrible _day."

As Spencer retreated into his room, there was a knock at the door and Freddie let himself in.

"Hey," he said. "You ready to start rehearsal?"

"Nah, Sam's not here yet," Carly replied. "Hey, you want some cake?"

"Does it have your special frosting on it?" Freddie asked hesitantly.

"Yes," Carly nodded.

"Uh, then, you know, I actually just filled up on my mom's tofu bars," Freddie said.

"But, you-"

"So where is Sam?" Freddie asked, cutting her off. "Detention?"

"No," Carly said. "She's hanging out with Brad. He's trying out a new fudge recipe and she's going to sample some and tell him how it is."

"Oh," Freddie shrugged. "If she's with Brad, I should've told her to ask him if we could borrow his fancy new video camera for the show tomorrow. You should see that baby, Carls. It's _beautiful_. I've been dreaming of getting my hands on one of them for weeks!"

"Um, it's a _camera_," Carly pointed out, amused.

Freddie gasped. "Don't say that! It's a masterpiece of technology!"

"_Okay_," Carly chuckled.

Just then the door opened again and Sam and Brad walked in.

"Hey you guys," Carly smiled.

"Hey," Sam replied.

"How's it going?" Brad said brightly.

"You guys don't mind if Brad helps out tonight during rehearsal, do you?" Sam asked.

"No, that'd be great, actually," Freddie said. "I could use somebody to help me out with the green screen."

"I'm your guy," Brad grinned. "Oh, and I brought over my new camera too."

"No way!" Freddie exclaimed. "Do you think I could, you know, try it out?"

"Sure," Brad nodded. "Oh, and I brought some new fudge over for you guys."

He pulled a container out of his backpack and set it out on the counter.

"You guys should try some, it's _delicious_," Sam said.

"Well Sam's the one who suggested I use extra chocolate," Brad said modestly.

"Oh my God," Carly said, taking a bite out of a piece. "This is even better than your usual fudge, Brad!"

"And that's saying something," Freddie added, also taking some fudge.

"Hey, so why don't you two go up and start setting up, and Carly and I will bring some drinks up to go with this fudge?" Sam suggested.

"Okay," Freddie shrugged. "Come on, Brad. I'll show you this new software update I just downloaded on my Pearbook."

Carly waited until the boys were safely upstairs before she turned to her best friend.

"So," she said, smirking. "How was Brad's?"

"Good," Sam replied, blushing.

"You really think you might be starting to like him?" Carly asked.

"I think," Sam nodded. "I mean he's such an awesome guy. He loves making me fudge, and he's really funny, plus his uncle is an actual announcer for MMA fights!"

"Then you should ask him out!" Carly encouraged. "I always thought you and Brad would make a cute couple."

"Really?" Sam said.

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "That's why I wanted to try and get you two together during the lock-in when I thought you liked him! But then it turned out you were into _Freddie_, and-"

"Okay, okay," Sam said quickly. "So, um, you-you think I should really ask him out? That doesn't make me look too…desperate?"

"No, of course not," Carly told her. "I've asked guys out before, and it was fine. Just ask him if he'd like to hang out with just you again at a nice restaurant or something."

"Maybe," Sam said thoughtfully.

"Sam, Brad's a great guy, and he likes spending time with you," Carly said. "And you haven't really dated anyone since you and Freddie broke up, and that was what, four months ago?"

"Five," Sam corrected.

"So I think you should totally try and get with Brad," Carly said. "It'd be nice for you."

"I'll think about it," Sam said, grabbing a few water bottles from the fridge. "Just…don't say anything in front of them up there."

"I won't," Carly promised.

….

"Okay," Freddie said a few hours later, as Sam pulled off her fake mustache and Carly kicked off her cowboy boots. "I think I can all of this edited for tomorrow night."

"Hey, if you need any help, you can always call," Brad said. "I can give you a hand with it after AV club tomorrow. Oh, and speaking of AV club, thanks again for making me vice president."

"Hey, you know more about video editing and technology than any of those other guys," Freddie shrugged.

"Aw, I think it's cute that you two have this little nerd bond going on," Carly grinned.

"Oh man, I need to get going," Brad said, looking down at his phone. "I need to get home and help my mom set up our new entertainment system."

"I'll walk down with you," Sam said quickly. "I need to go too."

"See you guys," Brad said.

"Bye!" Carly and Freddie called after them.

"You know," Carly said as the two left. "I think it's nice that you finally have someone to have your tech time with."

"I know, he's one of the few AV guys who aren't total dorks," Freddie agreed. "He's a cool dude."

"Yeah, that's probably why-um, never mind!"

"What?" Freddie frowned.

"Nothing," Carly said quickly. "Um, nice shirt."

"I wear this shirt all the time," Freddie said. "Come on, what were you going to say about Brad?"

"Okay, but you can't tell Sam I told you," Carly conceded. "I promised I'd keep this a secret."

"I won't," Freddie promised. "So what's the deal?"

"Sam…Sam has a crush on Brad," Carly told him.

Freddie's eyes widened. "W-What?"

"Sam has a-"

"No, no, I-I heard you," Freddie said. "Um, are you _sure_?"

"What do you mean?" Carly asked.

"Just that you thought she had a crush on him a few months ago at the lock-in, and she actually didn't," Freddie pointed out.

"Um, first of all," Carly said, crossing her arms. "_You _were the one who came running to me about Sam having a crush on him; I was acting on _your _information, pal! And second, Sam told me this herself."

Freddie blinked. "She-She did?"

"Yeah," Carly nodded. " A couple weeks ago, when he ate lunch with us at school. That's why she hung out with him after school today, she's trying to work up the courage to ask him out."

"Oh," Freddie said, looking down at his tech cart. "That's…interesting."

"Hold up," Carly frowned. "I give you top notch gossip and you tell me it's _interesting_? Come on, give me _something_!"

"I just never really pictured them together," Freddie mumbled.

"They'd be adorable," Carly reasoned. "She's all tough and sassy and he's sweet and charming. They're a perfect match!"

"Well how nice for them then!" Freddie snapped, surprising himself.

Carly gave him a strange look. "Um…you okay there?"

"Y-Yeah," Freddie said quickly. "Sorry, Carls. Hey, why don't we go downstairs and work on our economics project?"

"Okay," Carly nodded. "I'll go get the textbook while you finish putting away your cameras."

"All right," Freddie said.

He watched Carly leave the studio as he turned off his tech equipment.

So Sam liked Brad? Well this was…news. Weird news, really.

Honestly, since him and Sam had broken up five months ago, he hadn't even _thought _about what would happen when one of them started dating someone new. Maybe he had just assumed that if they weren't going to date each other, they simply wouldn't date anyone. But he knew that was ridiculous. It was perfectly natural for Sam to begin dating other guys…right?

He sighed, leaning against the cart. It sure didn't _feel _natural, though. In fact, if anything, it seemed quite _unnatural_; like someone had just punched him _hard _in the stomach. Why was the news of Sam dating someone making him feel this way?

_Because she's happy with someone who isn't you_, the voice in the back of his head told him cruelly. _She's moved on and you still haven't_.

"That's insane," Freddie said aloud to himself.

Of course he had moved on! What kind of pathetic loser wouldn't have moved on from a break-up that had happened _five months_ ago? He was _happy _that Sam, his _friend_, and nothing more, seemed to have found someone. So what if that someone wasn't him, but instead his close friend? He liked Brad, didn't he? He was a decent guy. So why did he have the sudden urge to slug him hard in the face?

…..

"Granddad, don't think of it as a loan," Spencer said, talking on his phone as Freddie and Carly sat downstairs a few hours later, working on their project. "Think of it as a-a contribution towards the fine people at the Seattle Police Department. Even if some of them are mean _jerks _that tell me I'm not fit to work at Pottery Barn and-hello? Dang it! He hung up on me!"

"Why are you trying to milk money out of your granddad?" Freddie asked.

"Because he got a ticket and he doesn't want to ask our dad for money because he just had to shell out a thousand bucks _last _month to cover that armadillo incident," Carly explained, rolling her eyes.

"That wasn't my fault!" Spencer exclaimed. "How was I supposed to know armadillos wouldn't make good pets?" He picked up his keys from the counter. "Anyway, I'm gonna run over to Socko's place and see if I can maybe convince his grandmother to buy that sculpture of the Christmas tree I made last year that she really liked so I can pay for this ticket. I'll be back later!"

"Okay," Carly replied. She turned back to Freddie. "So how about you read the rest of this chapter and I'll start on our report, and then we'll-"

But she was interrupted by Sam bursting into the apartment.

"Hey," she said brightly.

"Hey, Freddie and I outlined your part of the economics project," Carly told her. "So let's go, Puckett."

"Alright, alright," Sam said, sitting down next to Carly.

"Wow," Freddie said. "No arguing about having to actually do _work_? That's a first."

"Yeah, you're in a good mood," Carly nodded. "Why are you so-wait! Are you happy because…?"

"Uh-huh," Sam beamed.

"Oh my God!" Carly squealed, throwing her arms around her best friend. "Oh my God! You asked Brad out?"

"Yeah, I did it right after rehearsal, on our was down to the lobby, and he said he's actually been feeling the same way about me too, lately, but he was too afraid to say anything," Sam said excitedly. "So we decided to go get smoothies and it was so much fun! And we're going to Pini's tomorrow night!"

"No way!" Carly gasped. "Pini's is like, the official date place of Seattle! I'm so proud of you, Sam! This is so great, isn't this great, Freddie?"

"Er, yeah," Freddie nodded. Sam looked over at him, making eye contact for the first time since she had entered the apartment. He took a deep breath. "I-I'm real happy for you, Sam. Brad's a cool guy."

"Thanks," Sam said. She turned back to Carly. "So can you help me pick something out for tomorrow night?"

"Duh!" Carly nodded, tossing her textbook aside and getting to her feet. "I have this cute black dress that would look _perfect _on you. Especially with those heels I just bought at the mall the other day…come on, we can start planning now. We'll finish up the project tomorrow, okay Freddie?"

"Yeah…sure," Freddie nodded as the girls rushed upstairs.

As he sat alone on the couch, he couldn't shake the sinking feeling that was overtaking him. He felt a hundred times worse than he had when he found out Sam liked Brad just a few hours ago. Sam had been so thrilled about her and Brad…that _must've _meant she was officially over him and ready to move on with her dating life.

Any normal guy, Freddie realized, would take this as a sign that he too should try and find a nice girl to begin dating. But the idea of dating any girl right now who wasn't a certain blonde-headed demon sickened him.

_I'm not a normal guy anymore_, Freddie thought to himself as horrible realization sunk in slowly. _I'm a guy who's still hopelessly in love with his ex-girlfriend. _

….

"-And then that's when my grandma realized she not only dyed _her _hair pink, but my grandpa's hair too," Brad told Sam as they sat at their booth at Pini's the next evening.

"No way!" Sam laughed.

"True story," Brad said.

"Your lasagnas," their waiter said, placing their plates of steaming, cheesy goodness in front of them.

"Oh man, finally!" Sam grinned, grabbing her fork as the scent of the lasagna hit her nostrils.

"Let's see if this lasagna lives up to it's reputation," Brad said, taking a bite.

Oh that's right, you've never been here before," Sam nodded. "So how is it?"

"It's okay," Brad said. "Pretty good."

"Pretty good?" Sam repeated. "Um, in case your taste buds are on vacation, you just ate some of the best lasagna in the _world_."

She took a bite from her own plate, relishing in the flavor. "Yeah…that's _good _stuff." She grabbed the Parmesan cheese and began heaping it onto her lasagna. As she added the last of it, though, she suddenly thought back to when her and another tech-lover would come here, and he would always comment of how much cheese she put on her food, much to her annoyance. She glanced up at Brad, who was smiling back at her, not making a peep about her inappropriate cheese usage.

"So," Sam said, setting the empty cheese container down. "What do you like to do besides AV stuff and making fudge?"

"Well I'm actually a pretty big science fiction fan," Brad said.

"Oh," Sam nodded. "So you like all that _Galaxy Wars _chiz, right?"

"Eh, actually I'm not that into _Galaxy Wars_," Brad told her. "I find the movies to be a little…scientifically inaccurate. Plus the concept's a little overdone. Oh, are-are you a fan of those movies?"

"No, not really," Sam said. "I mean, I've _seen _them, but I never really liked them. I only watched them because-never mind." She quickly took another bite of her lasagna. "Um, thanks again for taking me here," she said. "I'm having a nice time."

"I'm glad," Brad smiled. "You look really nice tonight, by the way."

"Oh, well…thanks," Sam said.

Once the two finished their dinner, Brad paid, even though Sam offered to spilt the check with him (Carly had given her money before she came and told her that it would be a nice gesture if she offered to pay for herself), and then he drove Sam home.

"Wow, um…nice place," Brad said politely as he walked Sam up to her cluttered front porch, where they could hear her mom inside the house, yelling that a character on a soap opera was wearing the same top as her.

"Yeah," Sam mumbled. "So, um thanks again for tonight. It was a lot of fun."

"It was," Brad nodded.

"I-I'll see you at school tomorrow then," Sam said, reaching for her doorknob.

"Yeah," Brad echoed. "At school…"

And then, slowly, he leaned down. Sam realized as he moved closer what was going to happen, and quickly, before his lips could touch hers, she turned her head so that his lips instead collided with the side of her head.

She gave him a small awkward smile, and he cleared his throat.

"Well, I-I should probably get in…make sure my mom hasn't thrown another vase at the T.V.," Sam said quickly. "Bye!"

"Bye," Brad said, his face red with embarrassment at what just happened.

"Who do you think you are, Linda?" Sam heard her mother yelling as she walked into her house. "You think you can copy _Pam Puckett_? Well I'll show you!"

Sam rolled her eyes as she headed up to her room. She laid down on her bed and stared up at the ceiling. She was supposed to call Carly and tell her how her date went, but right now, _Sam_ didn't even know how her date went. She was so confused.

Brad was such a nice guy. He was polite to her and had been a real gentlemen. He hadn't freaked out about her loading her lasagna with cheese, and he didn't bore her with endless _Galaxy Wars _trivia facts, but instead entertained her with crazy stories about his family, which seemed almost as dysfunctional as hers (minus the prison records, of course). Yet, the entire time during their date, Sam felt sort of…distant, from Brad. She didn't feel any spark or excitement, and the lack of _any _argument the whole time seemed downright _strange _to her.

_I'm just not attracted to him_, she realized.

But why? Why wasn't she into the guy whom just a few days ago she had thought she was crushing on? He was smart, funny, charming, sweet…pretty much the perfect guy!

_He's sort of just like Fredork_, Sam thought to herself. _You know, except for all his stupid annoying habits. _

And then it hit her. _That _was why she had wanted to go out with Brad; because he was so much like Freddie! She felt her stomach clench as it dawned on her that her sudden attraction to Brad was simply a ploy she had built up to try and fill that empty void Freddie had left! The void in her that had been empty for five months.

"I still want Freddie," she said slowly, and as she heard the words aloud, it felt as if a great weight had been lifted from her chest.

But then weight returned as she remembered that Freddie and her had broken up, and that no matter how much she did want him, she wasn't going to get him anymore.

_You better settle for Brad_, she told herself. _Because he's all you got._

…

Freddie bitterly walked into the empty classroom where AV club meetings were held and sat down at the desk at the front of the classroom, hastily opening up his Pearbook. He had just walked past Sam and Brad holding hands by her locker, and he had instantly felt sick to his stomach.

Sam and Brad had been a couple for a little over a week now, and as each day that he had to watch the two of them together passed, the more anger built up inside of him.

He tried to cheer up as the rest of the AV club began to show up, but in reality, all he wanted to do at that moment was go home and lock himself in his room. But then again, maybe some good old audio video talk would help him feel better.

Unfortunately, though, that hope went right out the window as he saw Brad walk in with Sam.

"Hey man," Brad said brightly, taking a seat in the desk next to Freddie's, pulling up a chair so that Sam could sit next to him.

"What's _she _doing here?" Freddie frowned.

"Oh I'm just _so _interested in your dork talk that I _had _to come," Sam smirked, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "Brad asked me to come, nub!"

"Yeah, that's okay, isn't it?" Brad asked.

Freddie tightly gripped the edge of his desk. "_Sure_," he said moodily. "That's just _dandy_!"

Sam gave him a weird look, but didn't say anything.

"Okay!" Freddie said loudly, getting everyone's attention. "Let's get started. So our first order of business is actually something brought up by a lot of teachers. It seems they can't really get graphs to show up on their slideshows with the new programing the school just installed on all their laptops, so I was thinking it would be nice for us to try and figure out a way to help them out. Now, what I propose is that we install _another _software update onto their computers, this time one that will add the newest version of Splash, so that hopefully more images will be able to be displayed, including all of the graphs."

"Um, actually," Brad spoke up. "Wouldn't it just be easier if we told the teachers to convert their graphs to a JPG? That would show up with their new software, and that way we wouldn't have to overload their computers with more installations."

"No, my way's easier," Freddie said firmly.

"But…Brad's idea actually sounds good," Sam pointed out. "I mean, not that I'm a big advocate of helping teachers out, but it seems like a lot of trouble to get all their laptops to install a bunch of chiz onto them, doesn't it?"

"Only certified members of the AV club are permitted to speak at these meetings!" Freddie snapped.

"Well she was just making a point," Brad frowned.

"Well it was a stupid point!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Um, dude?" Brad said. "Are-Are you okay?"

"Yes! Yes, I'm _totally _okay!" Freddie said loudly, getting to his feet and stepping over to Brad's desk. "Why wouldn't I be okay? Huh, _Brad_? I mean, just because I thought you were my _friend_, but you've been rubbing the fact that you're now dating my ex-girlfriend in my face for the past week doesn't make me _not _okay! Just because you brought her to our AV club meeting with you, when she _never _came with me doesn't make me _not _okay! Just because I made a huge mistake in making a-a _jerk _like you vice president doesn't make me _not _okay!"

"Okay," Brad said, getting to his feet as well. "I think you need to calm down here, and maybe we can talk-"

Freddie laughed. "Talk?" he repeated. "You want to talk?"

"Dude, what's _wrong _with you?" Sam frowned.

"Um, did I not just finish telling your _boyfriend _here that there's nothing wrong with me?" Freddie said.

"Hey," Brad said firmly. "Don't talk to her like that! Seriously, what's going on here? I thought we were all friends here, but this is _definitely _not how friends act!"

"No!" Freddie said, his anger for this boy coursing through his veins. "And friends don't do _this _either!"

And before he could even register what he was doing, Freddie had raised his fist and punched Brad square in the eye.

He heard the AV members gasp as Brad staggered backwards. Freddie's eyes widened in shock as he realized what he had just done. Guilt and remorse flooded his body as Sam rushed up and ran over to Brad.

"What's the matter with you?" she yelled at Freddie, helping Brad up to his feet.

"I-I-" Freddie stammered as Brad looked up at him, confusion and hurt etched on his face. "I-I'm sorry."

And with that he turned and ran out of the room.

But it wasn't Brad who he had said those words to.

….

"I don't think you'll have a shiner," Sam said, pressing an ice bag onto Brad's eye. "He didn't hit you hard enough."

"I know," Brad nodded.

"Still," Sam cringed. "That had to hurt."

"I'll be fine," Brad assured her, giving a crooked smile.

"You know you totally could've have taken him," Sam said. "If you wanted to fight back."

"Maybe," Brad shrugged. "But I'm a pacifist."

"I thought you were Jewish," Sam frowned.

"No, I mean I don't hit people," Brad chuckled.

"Like…ever?" Sam said in amazement.

"That's right," Brad nodded.

"Huh…I didn't know that," Sam said. "That's…weird." She took a deep breath. "I don't know why Freddie was being such a…you know, in there."

"I do," Brad sighed, taking the ice bag off his eye. He looked down at his lap. "He's still in love with you."  
Sam blinked. "No," she said. "That-that's not right. We broke up, remember?"

Brad chuckled. "Just because two people break up doesn't mean they can't still be in love. I-I should've seen it sooner. He definitely still loves him…and-and I think maybe you still love him too."

"No I-" Sam began automatically, but Brad cut her off.

"Sam, it's okay," he said. "I-I get it."

Sam didn't reply.

"I see the way you look at him," Brad told her softly. "The way you light up around him…you don't do that with me. You guys are the ones who are meant to be together, Sam. Not you and me. And-And it's not right for me to hold you two back like this."

Sam looked up at him. "What are you saying?" she asked slowly.

"I don't think I'm the tech boy you want," Brad said gently. "Am I?"

Sam sighed. "Are-Are you mad?"

Brad shook his head. "No."

"Why?" Sam frowned. "You _should _be. I know I would be upset if a guy I was dating still had feelings for an ex."

"Look," Brad said. "I could just go on, trying to ignore what I know is between you and Freddie, but-that wouldn't be fair for you. Or Freddie. If I keep you him from him, I'm not being a true friend to you, Sam. And I'd rather lose you as a girlfriend than lose you as a friend all together."

Sam gave him a smile. "You've got to be from Canada or something…no one keeps his cool like this over what just happened." She moved closer to Brad and gave him a hug. "But, you know…thanks."

"Just make sure Freddie treats you right," he told her.

….

Freddie sat outside on his fire escape, staring out at Seattle. He felt awful that he had just hit Brad; the guy hadn't done anything wrong, and now he had probably destroyed a perfectly good friendship. But most of all, he felt sickened by the fact that after his little stunt back at AV club, Sam was probably so mad at him that she would never forgive him.

But just then, he heard someone step onto the fire escape, and he turned around to see none other than Sam standing there.

"What-What are you doing here?" he asked weakly.

Sam sat down on the window ledge. "Brad and I broke up," she said simply.

"Oh…Sam," Freddie sighed. "I'm sorry. I-I don't know why I punched him like that. But I didn't mean for him to break up with you over that."

"That's not why he broke up with me," Sam said.

"Oh," Freddie frowned. "Well then why-why did he?"

"Because he said that he wasn't the one who I was supposed to be with," Sam shrugged. "I guess I kind of see his point."

"Really?"

"Yup," Sam nodded.

"Well, um," Freddie said, nervously shifting in his seat. "Who-Who do you think you should be with then?"

Sam gave him her signature smirk. "Oh, I don't know. Maybe the guy who can actually talk me into watching the entire _Galaxy Wars _trilogy or lectures me on proper cheese usage."

Freddie could hardly believe his ears. "Are-Are you talking about-about-"

"His name's Pablo, and he lives across the street from me," Sam grinned.

"_Pablo_?" Freddie exclaimed.

Sam laughed. "Dude, calm down. I was talking about…you."

Freddie felt his heart skip a beat. "Me?"

Sam blushed and nodded. "It looks like there's only one tech guy who can make me all tingly and chiz."

Freddie moved closer to her. "And there's only one blonde-headed demon who can irritate me in all the right ways."

And with that he leaned down and gently kissed her, wrapping his arms tightly around her, determined to never lose her again.


	351. Chapter 351

_Cry_

"Emma, don't play with that soccer ball in my kitchen!" Sam said, pulling her ham out of the oven. "Do you want to hurt my masterpiece?"

"Oh, ham!" Emma said, reaching to pick of a piece of meat, only to have her hand swatted away by her mother.

"Absolutely not! I've been slaving over this baby for hours," Sam said. "I'm finally over that stupid stomach virus, and I have four days of meat to make up for. Besides, don't you have some soccer game to get to?"

"Whoa, you have a soccer game tonight?" Freddie asked, coming into the kitchen. "Why didn't I know this? I didn't have time to find my cool light up sign, I think I lost it."

"Yeah…lost it," Sam mumbled, putting a piece into her mouth, avoiding her husband's eye contact.

"It's an away game," Emma told him. "In Olympia. My friend's picking me up and she's going to drive me to the school, and then we're taking a bus to the match."

"Oh," Freddie said. "Well good luck then, sweetie."

"Luck…crab! I forgot my lucky sweatband," Emma said.

"I put it in your room, top drawer of your dresser," Sam said. "Oh my God, this is good ham!"

"Hey, where's Ashton?" Freddie asked as Emma ran up to her room.

"With the Jessie dude," Sam replied, wiping her hands on her jeans. "I think she said they were hanging out at his house tonight."

"Jessie…" Freddie muttered darkly.

"Come on, him and Ashton have been going out for like, four months," Sam said, rolling her eyes, amused. "You still hate the kid?"

"Yes!"

"Just because he's dating your daughter?" Sam said. "Baby, you've got to get past this. The girls are fifteen now; they _are _going to want to date boys."

"It's not just because he's dating my sweet, little daughter!" Freddie snapped. "I just don't get a good vibe from that kid. What, do _you _like him?"

Sam shrugged. "Ashton really seems to. I haven't actually talked with him too much, and neither have you! But see, I'm a _nice _person, and don't judge people before I get to know them."

Freddie nearly choked on the soda he had just swigged. "Um, okay, last week you made us leave the Cheesecake Warehouse because you said you hated our waiter before he even took our order!"

"He had weird hair!" Sam defended.

"And remember the time that you refused to go to my Christmas party at work because you said you knew you weren't going to like this one guy's wife even though you had never even _met _her?" Freddie continued. "Or that time-"

"Okay!" Sam exclaimed, grabbing her tray of ham. "Jeesh, I'm gonna go eat my ham in peace."

….

"Sweatband, sweatband," Emma mumbled up in her room, rummaging through her drawer. "Ah-ha! Found you!"

Just then her bedroom door opened and Ashton came in.

"Oh, back already from your date with _Jessie_," Emma grinned, closing her drawer.

Ashton didn't reply as she kicked off her shoes and sat down on her bed.

"What? Did all that kissing with your boyfriend wear out your mouth or something?" Emma asked, rolling her eyes. She looked over at her sister, and frowned, as she realized that her eyes were red and there were tears falling down her cheeks.

"Hey," Emma said softly, sitting down next to Ashton. "Ash? What's wrong? Why are you crying?"

"Me and Jessie broke up," Ashton said shakily.

"What?" Emma said. "But-But I thought you were so in love with him. He's all you've been talking about and thinking about since you two got together."

"Well he's been cheating on me," Ashton mumbled. "So I guess it was a pretty one-sided relationship."

"He _cheated _on you?" Emma gasped. "That-That jerkwad!"

"I just thought he liked me as much as I liked him," Ashton said, rubbing her eyes. "But I guess that was stupid of me, right?"

Emma put her arms around her twin and hugged her tight. "You can do thirty times better than a loser like Jessie Delfigalo. He's the one who should be crying right now, because he just let the best chick he'll ever date go."

Suddenly they heard a car horn in their driveway.

"I need to go," Emma said, slowly getting to her feet. "I have that soccer game…"

"Yeah, good luck," Ashton sniffed.

"But-But when I get back, we can have that girls night you've been bugging me to have for ages," Emma said quickly. "We can do our nails and put those weird face masks on and watch some cheesy chick flick."

"Thanks," Ashton said glumly.

"You'll be okay?" Emma asked, heading towards the door.

"Yeah, I-I'll be fine," Ashton nodded.

Emma gave her a small smile as she closed their bedroom door behind them and hurried downstairs.

"Bye, Em," Sam said from the couch where her and Freddie were sitting. "Oh, and did Ashton just come up?"

"We thought we heard her come in," Freddie said.

"Yeah, she's up there," Emma nodded. "But, um…she's-she's really upset."

"What do you mean?" Sam frowned.

"What's wrong?" Freddie asked.

"Her and Jessie broke up," Emma told them. "He cheated on her."

"What?" Freddie exclaimed, clenching his fists.

"Oh man," Sam sighed.

"She was crying when I left," Emma said.

"We should go and talk to her," Sam said to Freddie. "You go to your game, Em. We'll handle Ashton."

"Okay," Emma said. "I'll see you guys later."

"I _knew _I hated that kid!" Freddie said angrily as Emma left. "How dare he hurt Ashton like this! Oh _man _I want to just go and grab his scrawny little neck and just…ah!"

"Jessie's a good six inches taller than you," Sam pointed out.

"He's not fueled by fatherly rage, though," Freddie said.

"Well before you go beat up any teenagers," Sam said, patting his shoulder. "Let's go check on Ashton."

"Right," Freddie sighed.

The couple headed up to the twins room and knocked at the door.

"Ashton?" Sam called.

"It's open," the heard their daughter said quietly.

Freddie opened the door and him and Sam entered to find Ashton curled up on her bed, tears streaming down her face.

"Oh, sweetie," Freddie said, rushing over to his daughter and pulling her into his arms, his heart shattering at the sight of her obvious sadness.

"Did-Did Emma tell you?" Ashton asked between her sobs.

"Yeah," Sam said gently, taking a tissue from the nightstand and wiping the smeared make-up from Ashton's face. "She did."

"I-I just can't believe he was cheating on me the _entire _time we were together," Ashton sighed. "I-I thought I actually _loved _him. He was the best guy I ever dated." She began to cry harder into Freddie's shoulder. "I had just left his h-house today, when I-I realized I left my phone there. So I went back to get it, and-and he was standing right outside his door with this other girl, k-kissing her!"

Sam shook her head. "I'm so sorry, honey."

"He told me that-that _that _girl was the girl he really loved," Ashton squeaked. "And that I-I was just some piece of arm candy for him to have around school."

Freddie could feel the anger coursing through his veins for the boy who had done this to his daughter.

"He never deserved you, Ashton," Freddie said firmly. "If he couldn't see how _beautiful _and _perfect_ you are, then he shouldn't be lucky enough to have you in his life."

"But I was so sure that he liked me as much as I liked him," Ashton said. "I thought he _loved _me."

"I know you did," Sam said. "But sweetie, I know how bad you're feeling right now, but you'll find someone _so _much better than Jessie some day. Some one who will realize what a great girl he has and won't dream of doing anything to hurt you."

"Or I can just keep finding losers like him," Ashton mumbled.

"Hey," Freddie said. "Don't say that."

"Why not? It's true!" Ashton said angrily. "If I'm stupid enough to not know that the boy I was so in love with didn't even love me back, how am I ever supposed to find a decent guy?"

"Look, Ash," Sam said. "You can't just let one bad relationship that you had when you were only _fifteen_ determine your life. Jessie is _one guy. _Don't give him the satisfaction of doing this to you, _nobody's _worth that."

"No," Freddie agreed.

Ashton sighed. "I still feel suckish though."

"That's okay," Sam said. "It hurts when you get your heartbroken, sweetie, I know."

Ashton let out another cry and Freddie hugged her again.

"You're not going to feel like this forever," Sam told her. "You'll feel down for a few days, sure, but then you're going to bounce back; you're a strong girl!"

"I don't feel like one now," Ashton mumbled.

Sam gave her a weak smile and stood up. "You will," she promised. "Anyway, your dad and I will leave now, because I'm guessing you want a little alone time."

Ashton nodded. "Yeah…I do."

"You know you can come get us if you need us," Freddie said.

"Thanks," Ashton said softly.

"And there's ice cream and cookie dough downstairs, if you need it," Sam said knowingly.

"You know I'm going to hurt that kid," Freddie said once him and Sam had left the twins' room.

"Yeah, baby, I don't know when you think you became all fighty, but throwing punches really isn't your thing," Sam said.

"He broke our daughter's heart!"

"And you don't think I want to make him suffer?" Sam said. "But I also don't want to have to drive out of my way to the hospital to visit you for the next week!"

"Well then what? You can't get in any more trouble after that fireworks stunt you pulled last month, so is he just going to get away with it?" Freddie snapped.

"No," Sam said, her eyes glistening. "We are going to make a quick phone call to my Uncle Carmine."

"I never thought I'd be so happy to hear those words," Freddie said, a grin sneaking onto his face. "Your family of prisoners is finally going to come in handy! So you call him, and I'm going to go get my laptop."

"Why?" Sam frowned.

"I may not be fighty, but I can dish out virtual hurt," Freddie said. "I hope Jessie's ready to kiss his computer fun goodbye, because he's got a mighty virus coming his way."


	352. Chapter 352

_Bikini_

"You know," Carly said as her, Gibby, Sam and Freddie walked along the beach. "I think we really needed a beach day, don't you, guys?"

"Yeah, I can finally take my shirt off without being judged," Gibby said. "Do you know how hard its been to not do that at inappropriate times anymore?"

"Why _don't _you anymore?" Sam asked.

"Because Gibby _matured," _Carly answered. "He realized that he's not some goofy kid anymore, and that in a civilized society, people stay clothed in public."

"No, actually, I was at the mall one time, and I had just taken off my shirt, when out of nowhere I bump into this cactus!" Gibby explained. "My shoulder got all scratched up! So really it's more a matter of personal safety."

"Why was there a cactus in the mall?" Carly frowned.

"How should I know?" Gibby shrugged. "I'm not the cactus police."

"Well you know what, Carls? I'm so glad you decided that we should spend the day at the beach," Freddie said, draping his arm around Sam.

"Since when do you like the beach so much?" Carly asked. "You usually complain that it's just a hot pit of sand surrounded by salty, dirty water."

"He just wants to see Sam in a bikini," Gibby said.

Sam grinned up at her boyfriend. "Really, nub? What if I told you I was just going to keep my t-shirt on all day?"

"Well I'd probably cry," Freddie said simply.

"Hey, let's go set up our towels over by the lifeguard stand," Carly said. "That way we'll have a nice view."

"Why do we want to stare at life guards?" Gibby asked.

"Because they're cute and shirtless!" Carly hissed.

The four headed over to the lifeguard stand and laid out their towels.

"Um, Carly, I think you picked the hottest spot on the beach for us to sit," Freddie commented, pulling off his t-shirt.

"Yeah," Sam nodded, shrugging off her shorts and t-shirt. "It's a million degrees here!"

"Oh man, I'm gonna turn into a lobster," Gibby said. "I burn like a baby's bottom!"  
"Well then let's go into the ocean," Carly suggested, pulling off her sundress. "We can cool down there."

"Alright," Gibby agreed.

"I guess that will work," Freddie nodded. He turned to Sam. "You ready baby?"

"You guys go in," Sam said, settling down on her towel. "I'll stay up here."

"Why?" Carly frowned. "You were just complaining how hot it is here."

"I know," Sam said. "But then I realized it would be the perfect opportunity to work on my tan."

"Come on, just come into the ocean with us," Freddie said. "You're plenty tan."

"No," Sam said, laying down on her towel and closing her eyes. "Besides, you should _want _someone to stay up here with your stuff. That lifeguard up there looks pretty suspicious."

"Our stuff will be fine, Sam," Carly said. "Now will you just get your butt up and come in the ocean with all of us?"

"Nope."

"Why not?"

"Maybe she can't swim," Gibby chuckled.

Sam narrowed her eyes and sat up, reaching for one of her discarded flip-flops and chucking it hard at him. "I can _swim_, Gibwad."

"Yeah, we've seen her swim at the pool a million times," Freddie pointed out.

"Exactly!" Sam said. "So why can't you guys go into the ocean and leave me alone up here to relax?"

"We've seen you swim in the pool," Freddie said again slowly. "But that's it."

"Huh?" Carly frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Just go already," Sam snapped.

"I mean," Freddie said. "That we've seen her swim in pools, but every time that we come to the beach, she won't swim in the _ocean_. She'll always work on her tan or hang out by the snack stand."

"Sam?" Carly said, a small smile creeping onto her face. "Are you _afraid _of the ocean?"

"No!" Sam scoffed.

"Wow, this makes my fear of fruit stands seem not so bad, doesn't it?" Gibby said.

"No, that's still pretty bad," Freddie said. He turned to his girlfriend. "Baby, why are you afraid of going in the ocean? I mean, like we said, we _know _you can swim, so what's the big deal?"

"I told you, I'm not afraid!" Sam said.

Freddie gave her a knowing look.

"Well there's sharks in there!" Sam conceded. "And jellyfish, and stingrays, and those fish with the teeth, and _dolphins-_"

"Dolphins?" Carly repeated, amused.

"They can be vicious!" Sam defended. "And you can't even _see _if one of those things is sneaking up on you because the dang water's so murky from the sand! Plus there's drop offs everywhere, and huge waves that pull you out to see, and don't even get me _started _on the seaweed."

"Okay, now why couldn't my mom be here to hear _that_?" Freddie chuckled. "You would've gone up so much in her mind; she's always wanted someone to bond over irrational beach fears with."

Sam glared at him and threw her bottle of sunscreen at him, hitting him at the exact spot no boy would want hit.

"Ow!" Freddie gasped, clutching Gibby's shoulder for support.

"You deserved that!" Sam said. "And those aren't irrational beach fears!"

"Sam, the odds of you being attacked by a shark are like, ten thousand to one," Carly explained. "And we've never seen any jellyfish or stingrays any other time we've been to the beach, and I _promise_, dolphins are harmless…unless you did what Spencer did that one time at the aquarium, but that's another story."

"And seaweed can actually be a great face mask," Gibby added.

Carly gave him a strange look.

"What? You think this smooth face just _happens_?" Gibby frowned.

"Sam," Freddie said gently, sitting down next to her. "Why don't you just try going in the ocean?"

"Because I don't want to," Sam mumbled, her cheeks red with embarrassment.

"You might like it," Freddie reasoned, putting his arm around her.

"Um, no, I won't," Sam said.

"Just give it a chance," Freddie said softly. "For me?"

Sam looked down at her lap.

"I'll hold your hand the entire time," Freddie whispered so only she could hear him.

Sam sighed. "Will you all get off my back if I go in?"

"Yup," Carly nodded.

"Then fine, whatever," Sam surrendered, getting to her feet, gripping Freddie's hand tightly. "I'll go in the stupid ocean."

"I'm proud of you, baby," Freddie smiled, giving her a long kiss.

"I better be getting _two _ice cream cones from the snack stand for this," Sam muttered under her breath.

"You got it," Freddie told her.

The four teens headed towards the ocean.

"Alright, time to go make some fish friends," Gibby said, pulling on a snorkel mask and wading into the water.

"And I promised Spencer I'd bring him back some cool seashells for his sculpture, so I'd better start looking around here," Carly said, knowing Sam would feel more comfortable just being with Freddie right now.

"You know," Sam said as her and Freddie stood right at the shore line, their feet getting washed over by the waves. "I hope you'll feel really bad when I get mauled by a dolphin."

"You're not going to get mauled by a dolphin," Freddie said. He gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. "You ready?"

"Let's get this over with," Sam moaned.

Freddie began to lead the two into the ocean.

"Okay, okay, I'm in, now can I go back?" Sam asked.

"Sam, we're in like, three inches of water," Freddie said.

"And I can already feel weird things around my feet," Sam said.

"Let's just go up to our waists," Freddie said.

"Our _waists_?" Sam exclaimed. "Are you _kidding _me? What are you trying to do here, Benson? Get back at me for eating all your fries at the Groovy Smoothie yesterday?"

"No, I'm trying to help you conquer your fears," Freddie told her.

Sam rolled her eyes. "Alright! Let's go deeper…slowly!"

Freddie had to admit, he liked seeing this scared, more vulnerable side of his usually fearless girlfriend.

"What was that?" Sam asked, clutching Freddie's hand so tight that he could feel it going numb.

"Relax, baby, it's just a little fish," Freddie told her.

"Freddie…I don't like this," Sam said softly.

Freddie looked down at her face and saw how upset she looked.

"Do you want to go back?" he asked her gently.

Sam nodded.

"Okay," Freddie said. "Let's go back."

The couple quickly waded back to the sand. Sam sat down on her towel. "I hate the beach."

"No you don't," Freddie said, sitting down next to her and wrapping his bare arms around her. "You still love the sand and the sun, don't you? You're just not the biggest fan of the ocean."

Sam didn't reply.

"I'm sorry I forced you in," Freddie continued. "You-You were clearly afraid, and I should've just left it at that."

"It's not your fault," Sam sighed. She rested her head on his shoulder. "I'm pathetic, aren't I?"

"Why? Because there's _one thing _you're afraid of?" Freddie said. "That doesn't make you pathetic, Sam. That makes you _human_."

"But it's such a stupid thing to be afraid of," Sam said.

"So?" Freddie shrugged. "It's not stupid to you. Besides, everyone has weird things that freak them out. Gibby has fruit stands and bongos, Carly has that weird thing with birds, and we both know _I'm _a mess. Let's see, I'm afraid of spiders, mechanical pencils, hamsters, scary movies-"

"Yeah, you _are_ a freak," Sam agreed, grinning up at her boyfriend.

"And you're still the toughest chick around," Freddie told her, placing a soft kiss on her lips.

…

**AN-Still going strong for Seddie ;) **


	353. Chapter 353

**AN-Hey, that request with Sam and Jade talking about Freddie and Beck is coming, don't worry! I just have a bunch before it I need to do, but I'm definitely doing it!**

…**.**

_Tea_

"Alright," Carly sighed, looking at her checklist on her phone. "Earplugs, headphones, spray bottle…"

"Hey kid," Spencer said, walking into the room. "Whatcha doing?"

"Just getting ready for iCarly rehearsal," Carly explained.

"Oh cool," Spencer said, looking at the materials she had gathered. "So are you doing a some sort of soundless water fight?"

"Nah," Carly said. "These are just for me. See, Sam's bringing Landon over, and Freddie's bringing Lindsay, and you _know _that whenever those four are in the same room, it's bound to be loud."

"Ah, right," Spencer nodded.

"I mean, I get that it can be a little awkward for Sam and Freddie to hang around each other's new date," Carly said. "But they of course bring it to the next level. The _yelling _level. They're just trying to make it seem like each of them is the happier one in their new relationship."

"That must suck for Landon and Lindsay," Spencer commented.

"Who cares?" Carly scoffed. "I can't stand either of them."

"Really?" Spencer frowned.

"Well, Landon's always making these _terrible _jokes at the _worst _times," Carly said. "And Lindsay's _so _whiney and needy. I don't see what Sam and Freddie see in them. Personally, I think they're just trying to make each other jealous."

"Ah high school drama," Spencer said reminiscently. "I remember it like it was yesterday…"

"That's because you only hang around high schoolers, so you _did _deal with high school drama then," Carly pointed out.

"You know, I could have grown up friends if I wanted to!" Spencer snapped.

"Right," Carly grinned, rolling her eyes.

Just then there was a knock at the door and Freddie walked in, followed by a small brunette girl.

"Hey," Freddie said brightly. "You ready to do a little iCarly?"

"Freddie!" the girl moaned, standing at the doorway. "You-You didn't hold the door open for me! Are you _mad _at me? Did I do something wrong?"

"No!" Freddie said quickly, rushing back over to the door, holding it open (even though it wasn't a swinging door, so it stayed perfectly open without him holding it). "Sorry, Lindsay."

"Thank you, Freddie-poo," Lindsay smiled, tickling Freddie's chin as she walked in.

"Oh _God_," Spencer cringed.

"Hey, Lindsay," Carly said, plastering a smile on her face. "_So _glad you could make it today."

"Sweetie," Lindsay said, clutching to Freddie's arm, ignoring Carly's greeting. "How long is this little computer thing going to take? I wanted to take you to my place and introduce you to my new puppy."

Carly and Spencer exchanged looks.

"Oh, well, rehearsal shouldn't run more than a few hours," Freddie said slowly. "I guess you and I can go see your puppy after."

"Yay!" Lindsay said happily.

Just then the door opened again and Sam walked in, followed by a tall, muscular blonde boy.

"Oh yay," Carly said lamely. "Now Landon's here too."

"What goes on?" Sam said, heading into the kitchen. "You guys still have any brownies left?"

"In the fridge," Spencer said.

"Hey, you know what they would call brownies if they weren't brown?" Landon asked.

"What, baby?" Sam asked.

"Ies!" Landon laughed. "You get it? Because they aren't brown, so you can't call them _brown_ies!"

"Oh yeah, that's a good one!" Lindsay nodded.

"Yeah," Sam said, forcing a laugh while fighting the urge to roll her eyes. "Real funny."

"It must take a real _genius _to make that joke up," Freddie said bitterly. "Now see, _Lindsay _here, a member of the school's _honor society_, tells classy, _witty _jokes."

"Well your genius girlfriend laughed, now didn't she?" Sam smirked.

"Because she, unlike certain _other _girls, is polite!" Freddie snapped.

"At least _Landon_, unlike certain _other _boys has a sense of humor!" Sam retorted.

"Wow," Spencer said, grabbing an apple from the fruit bowl. "I do _not _want to be here."

"Coward," Carly mumbled as her brother headed out the back door. She turned back to her friends. "So, who's ready to do a little iCarly?"

"You know Lindsay's grandmother was the first female garbage collector?" Freddie said to Sam, narrowing his eyes. "Pretty impressive, isn't it?"

"Well _Landon's _grandfather was in a _band_," Sam argued.

"This is going to be a long rehearsal," Carly sighed.

….

"So then after we finish filling Gibby's pants with gummy worms," Freddie said, jotting a few notes down on his Pearpad. "We can go ahead and do the re-amped spit take bit, and then that's it."

"Sounds good," Carly nodded.

"Hey, you know the only thing funnier than a spit take?" Landon grinned. "A _dog _doing a spit take! You know, because they have weird tongues, so the spit would just go _everywhere_!"

"Oh…yeah, that's-that's a good one," Sam said weakly.

"Real charming," Carly said.

"Oh no!" Lindsay gasped, running over to Freddie's tech cart. "Freddibear!"

"What's wrong?" Freddie frowned.

"While I was standing over by the door, watching you give _all _your attention to those other two girls, my-my shirt sleeve must've got caught in something!" she sniffed. "Look at it! My shirt's totally ruined!"

"I think it looks better," Sam smirked.

"Sam," Carly hissed, trying to hold back a laugh.

"Well, um, no problem," Freddie said. "I can take you back to your place, and then you can change your shirt."

"No!" Lindsay wailed. "I can't wait that long! My poor shirt won't make it. Oh, _Freddie_! This is just the worst day _ever_!"

"Um, there's some scissors downstairs," Carly offered. "You can maybe cut the thread so it won't unravel your sleeve anymore."

"I _guess _that will work," Lindsay mumbled miserably.

"Hey, do you care if I go grab some water from your fridge?" Landon asked as Lindsay headed out of the studio.

"Sure, go ahead," Carly nodded.

"I'll bring you back some water, baby," Landon told Sam. "Hey! I'll be your water boy! Get it? Like those losers who sit on the benches at games and give all the players water? Only I'm not a loser."

"Well…" Freddie began, earning him a kick in the shins from Sam.

"I need a bubble bath," Carly sighed, rubbing her temples.

"That Lindsay sure is a _delight_," Sam said, her voice dripping in sarcasm.

"Hey, at least my girlfriend doesn't sound like a moron every time she opens her mouth," Freddie snapped.

"Well that's a matter of opinion _Freddiebear_," Sam retorted. "And Landon's not a moron! He's _practicing _his comedy act so that when he graduates, he can become a stand-up comedian!"

"Oh, well I'll be sure to go see one of his performances!" Freddie said. "You know, if I'm ever in excruciating pain and want to be put out of my misery!"

"If you want to be put out of your misery, all you'll have to do is stay in with Lindsay!" Sam frowned. "And listen to her stupid whiney voice! _Oh, Freddie. My shirt's wrinkled, call in the National Guard to iron it for me_!"

"You're just jealous that _I _have a wonderful girlfriend while you're stuck with that Landon freak," Freddie said, crossing his arms.

"Hey, my _boyfriend _is awesome!" Sam said firmly.

"You guys," Carly said, stepping between her feuding friends. "You're being ridiculous right now. You don't need to be _competing _with your new relationships."

"We're not competing," Freddie said, still glaring at Sam.

"Just stating the obvious," Sam said. "That Landon's way better than Lindsay is."

"Oh, what a load of-"

"And it's bubble bath time," Carly said, shaking her head as she headed out of the studio.

…

"-And so then I was thinking we could go back to my place and watch my ballet recital from when I was four," Lindsay said, hanging onto Freddie's arm as he piled books into his bag after school the next day.

"Yeah, that sounds…fun," Freddie nodded. "Are we still on for studying this afternoon, though?"

"No, I'm sorry, I need to go shopping with my mom," Lindsay said, rustling his hair. "I'm sorry, honeybun."

"Oh no, it's fine," Freddie said quickly. "I'll catch you later then."

"Okay, bye!" Lindsay said brightly, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek before running off.

Carly walked over as she left.

"Do you _really _like her?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"What?" Freddie scoffed. "Of course I do! She's my girlfriend, why wouldn't I like her?"

"What's her last name?"

"Um," Freddie frowned. "It's-It's something-something…burg?"

"Uh-huh," Carly nodded knowingly.

Just then Sam and Landon walked by.

"-And that's why jellyfish sting people!" Landon laughed loudly.

"Yeah, real-real funny," Sam nodded. "Hey, don't you have lacrosse practice to get to?"

"Oh yeah! I almost forgot!" Landon said. He quickly leaned down and gave Sam a peck on the lips. "Gotta run, babe, bye!"

"Well, that scent of desperation and hairspray that's in the air must mean that Lindsay was just here a little while ago," Sam said, joining the two by Freddie's locker.

"At least it masks the scent of Landon's idiocy," Freddie said coolly.

"Guys, can we please not do this _every single day_?" Carly moaned.

"Do what?" Sam asked.

"Never mind," Carly sighed. "Anyway, you two need to go pick up the tea for iCarly tonight. You know, to fill the giant teacup Spencer made?"

"Make Fredwad go on his own," Sam said.

"It's twenty pounds of tea, he can't carry all that back to the studio on his own," Carly told her. "I'd help you guys, but me and Wendy have to finish up our science fair project at the library right now."

"Fine," Freddie conceded. "Where are we supposed to pick up the tea?"

"That new tea lounge across from the Groovy Smoothie," Carly replied. "The owner agreed to give us all the tea for free if we have Gibby go down there next week and dress up in some costume to attract customers…I should probably tell him about that soon."

"Whatever," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Let's just go get this over with. At least I can get some scones while we're there."

….

"-And then Lindsay told me I was the best checkers player I ever met," Freddie said proudly as him and Sam walked into the tea lounge.

"Oh yeah? Well Landon told _me _I was the best tic-tac-toe player ever!" Sam said as they approached the counter.

"Can I help you two?" a server asked them.

"Um yeah, we're supposed to pick up twenty pounds of tea we ordered for our web show, iCarly," Freddie replied.

"Oh right, I'll go get your tea," the man nodded, hurrying to the back room.

"Dang it, this place doesn't even have scones," Sam mumbled, looking at the baked goods. "All they have here are weird fruit tarts."

"Why don't you get your boyfriend to buy you some scones?" Freddie smirked, rolling his eyes.

"At least Landon wouldn't sit there and complain about the price of the scones like _somebody _would, and-hey!"

She looked over at one of the couches, where there was a couple making out. Freddie looked at where she was staring. "What?" he asked. "What's so-hey!"

He saw it too. That couple on the couch was none other than his Lindsay and Sam's Landon.

The two of them pulled away and looked over at Sam and Freddie, both looking like deer in headlights.

"What's going on?" Sam asked, storming over to the couch, Freddie at her heels.

"Yeah!" Freddie echoed.

"We-We can explain," Lindsay said quickly.

"Yeah, it's actually a funny story," Landon said.

"Oh save it! Nothing that comes out of your mouth is funny," Sam snapped.

Landon gasped, offended.

"It's just-" Lindsay told Freddie. "Landon connects to me on an _emotional _level. He really gets me."

"Well good for him, because you're so wonko with your emotions that no _normal _person could get you!" Freddie said. "Seriously, you freak out over _everything_!"

"That's so _mean_!" Lindsay pouted.

"You know," Landon frowned, putting his arm around Lindsay. "We don't need this. Sam, you and me-"

"Oh no, buddy. I'm dumping _you_," Sam cut him off. "We're _done_."

"Yeah, so are we," Freddie said to Lindsay.

"Fine," Lindsay snipped. "Come on, Landy. Let's get out of here."

"Unbelievable," Sam said, sinking onto the couch as the new couple left. "They cheated on us with each _other_?"

"It's real messed up, isn't it?" Freddie sighed, sitting down next to her.

"You feel upset?" Sam asked.

"Strangely…no," Freddie said. "You?"

"Actually, no, I'm not," Sam said. "Maybe…maybe it's because Landon wasn't _really _the perfect boyfriend I made him out to be. Honestly, he _was _sort of an idiot."

"At least you didn't have to listen to him whine over _everything_," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Lindsay was a pretty rotten girlfriend, now that I think about it."

"Yeah, but I bet _she_ didn't keep you up until three in the morning telling you the _lamest _jokes," Sam pointed out. "I think having Landon as a boyfriend was definitely worse than you having Lindsay as a girlfriend."

"Please," Freddie scoffed. "She was so annoying! Last night she made me sit with her and watch some weird vampire movie instead of catching the new episode of _Girly Cow_."

"I couldn't even _hear _that episode," Sam retorted, getting to her feet. "Because dumb old Landon kept telling me some joke about a puffer fish!"

"Lindsay's hair smelled like broccoli!" Freddie said loudly, standing up as well.

"Landon stored his gym bag in his car, so the whole thing _stunk_!"

"Lindsay would never let me pick where we ate!"

"Landon was a vegetarian! He never bought me meat!"

"Lindsay told me my nose was off center!"

"Landon told me my ears weren't the same size!"

"Yeah, well, I didn't even really _like_ Lindsay!" Freddie said, putting his hands on his hips.

"Oh, and you think I actually found a buffoon like _Landon _attractive?" Sam snapped.

"Well the only reason I even dated Lindsay in the first place was to try and make _you _jealous!" Freddie yelled.

"The only reason I went out with Landon was to make you jealous too!" Sam screamed.

"Well it worked!"

"Yeah it did!"

"Wait… are you saying you still have feelings for me then?"

"Are you saying you still have feelings for _me_?" Sam shouted.

"Yes I am!"

"Well then I am too!"  
"Well I'm glad you do!"

"I'm glad _you _do!"

"So are we back together?" Freddie questioned loudly.

"Obviously!"

"Well then good!"

"Good!"

"I'm going to kiss you then!"  
"Well you'd better!"

And with that Freddie crashed his lips to Sam, feeling he readily respond as she threw her arms around his neck.

When they finally ran out of breath and pulled away, the two looked at each other, smiling.

"Well I guess dating Landon wasn't _totally _useless then," Sam chuckled.

"Um, I think it was me dating someone as awful as Lindsay that really pushed us," Freddie pointed out.

"Wait," Sam frowned. "Do you think _you're _going to get the credit for getting us back together?"

"Well…sort of," Freddie nodded.

"What? No way!" Sam exclaimed. "It was all me!"

"Are you crazy?"

"You're the crazy one, nub," Sam said.

"Hold on," Freddie said. "Are-Are we really going to have this argument?"

"You bet," Sam grinned, grabbing his hand. "After we catch up on some…_other _activities."

"I think I like the sound of this," Freddie laughed as Sam pulled him out of the tea lounge.

"Wait!" the server at the counter yelled as the couple rushed out. "You forgot your twenty pounds of tea!"

…..

**AN-Sort of got the idea for the end of the chapter from Drake and Josh, where Josh and Mindy were arguing right before they wound up kissing in Eric Punches Drake. **


	354. Chapter 354

**AN-So this chapter is not really a sequel, but it based off of a previous chapter. It's Sam and Freddie's one-year anniversary the was Sam described it in chapter 335, when she was helping Emma get ready for her own anniversary. **

…

_Raincoat_

"Hey, Sam," Spencer said, yawning as he came out of her room, spotting his little sister's best friend in his kitchen, making some eggs. He looked over at the coffee table and saw piles of fashion magazines. "Whoa, was Carly down here going through all these?"

"No, I was," Sam said, heading back to the couch with her breakfast. She sat down and picked up one of the magazines and began flipping through it.

"Um, you?" Spencer frowned.

"Yeah…I need a dress," Sam said, not looking up.

"You know you're _Sam_, right?"

"Calm down, I'm only looking because it mine and Freddie's anniversary next week," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Oh right," Spencer nodded. "Wow, I can't believe you two have really been together for a whole year."

"Me neither," Sam said. "And you'll be happy to know that the nub hasn't been to the emergency room _once _during that time."

"Nice," Spencer said, high fiving her.

"Hey, you're up early, Sam," Carly commented, coming downstairs, still in her pajamas. "Have you found any dresses you like yet?"

"No, and I've been through all of these magazines you gave me!" Sam moaned.

"Well we'll hit the mall today," Carly assured her, pouring three mugs of coffee. "Maybe you can find something there."

"So where's Freddie taking you for this special date?" Spencer asked as Carly handed him his coffee.

"This fancy dinner cruise," Sam replied.

"Whoa," Spencer said approvingly.

"It's so romantic," Carly said, sitting down next to Sam. "Freddie found this company that takes couples out to sea on this beautiful boat for a few hours so they can enjoy a five-course meal under the stars as the gentle waves rock them closer to each other."

"Ugh, I don't even know what _color _dress I should get!" Sam exclaimed, frustrated, as she threw her magazine down.

"Hey, this is why you have me," Carly told her. "I've got you on this, Sam. We're going to find you the most beautiful dress out there, and Freddie's going to go absolutely _nuts _over you in it."

"I dunno, I'm not good with dresses," Sam said. "I can never find ones I like."

"Tell me about it," Spencer sighed.

Carly and Sam looked over at him questioningly.

"I-I'm gonna go," Spencer said quickly, running back to his room.

…..

"Okay, what about any of these?" Carly asked, coming back into Sam's dressing room with an armload of dresses.

Sam, who was examining the black dress she was currently wearing in the mirror, took the pile and began to go through them.

"Too long, too short, weird sleeves, looks like a rug…" Sam said, dismissing each dress by dropping it carelessly on the floor.

"Well, Sam you have to at least have_ some _idea of what kind of dress you're looking for," Carly said. "Give me _something _to work with here! We've been at the mall for five hours, even _I'm _getting sick of it! I still don't see what's wrong with that dress you have on."

"It doesn't match my hair right," Sam mumbled.

"Okay, since when have _you _cared about matching your dress to your _hair_?" Carly asked, crossing her arms.

"I just…I just need to look good, okay?" Sam sighed, grabbing her jeans and pulling them back on.

"And you will," Carly said. "I get that you want to look extra hot for Freddie on your anniversary, but you don't need to obsess _this much _over it. Freddie loves you; you don't need to find some super rare dress that's probably not even in this mall for your date. Just find a dress that you really like that you feel good in."

Sam sighed. "But I still don't really like any of these dresses."

"Well, okay, that's fine," Carly said. "Let's go try some more stores then."

The girls left the dressing room and headed back out to the mall. After a quick stop at the corndog cart, they began searching for dress shops again.

"I really think you should stick with darker colors," Carly said as they walked. "To really make your hair stand out, you know what I mean? Oh, and once we do find your dress, we should probably start thinking about shoes, and then-"

"Carly!" Sam said suddenly, grabbing her best friend's arm as she stopped in her tracks. "There it is!"

Carly looked over at the store window Sam was staring at.

"Wow," Carly smiled. "That's beautiful. That dress is-is-"

"-My anniversary dress,' Sam finished for her.

…..

"Sam, stay still! You're going to make me give you uneven eyelashes!" Carly said as she fussed with Sam's make-up.

"You sure this new perfume doesn't make me smell weird?" Sam asked, applying a coat of lip-gloss.

"Sam, that's ninety dollar perfume; you smell _amazing_," Carly said. She finished the last of Sam's make-up. "You look really pretty."

"Thanks," Sam said, fidgeting with her dress as she looked at the mirror.

"You nervous still?" Carly asked.

"A-A little," Sam nodded.

"Hey, this is going to be one of the best dates of your life," Carly told her. "_Enjoy _it. You're going to have a great time."

"Sam!" the heard Spencer call from downstairs. "Freddie's here!"

"Oh man," Sam said, smoothing out her dress.

"Let's go," Carly said, grabbing her digital camera from her dresser. "I can't wait to see Freddie's face when he sees you."

….

"Whoa, doesn't someone look all fancy in his little suit," Spencer commented as Freddie came into the apartment.

"Sam here yet?" Freddie asked nervously.

"She's upstairs getting ready with Carly," Spencer told her. "Hold on, I'll get her…Sam! Freddie's here!"

"Thanks," Freddie said.

"So you excited?" Spencer asked.

"Of course," Freddie nodded. "I just hope Sam has a good time tonight…I've been planning this night for an entire month."

"She'll have a good time no matter what you guys do," Spencer assured him. "She's crazy for you."

Just then they heard footsteps coming down the stairs, and a second later Carly and Sam appeared.

Freddie's mouth almost dropped as he caught sight of his girlfriend. She looked absolutely beautiful in her simple, yet stunning, lavender sleeveless dress that hugged her body perfectly.

"Sam," Freddie said softly as she walked over to him, her cheeks reddening. "You-You look…incredible."

"Thanks," Sam smiled.

"Doesn't this just warm your heart?" Carly asked Spencer, snapping a few pictures as the two watched the scene.

"It completely makes up for Juliana dumping Clive in my soap opera today," Spencer whispered, wiping a tear from his eye.

"Yeah…let's get you back on that online dating site," Carly frowned, patting her brother's shoulder. She turned back to her friends. "Alright you two, you have a good time tonight."

"Thanks Carls," Sam said. "I'll swing by here later tonight."

"Bye," Freddie said, taking Sam's hand as he led her out of the apartment.

"Wow," Sam said as they headed down to the lobby. "One year…can you believe this?"

"It's pretty crazy," Freddie agreed, grinning. "But I'm glad we made it."

"Me too," Sam nodded as they started out the front door and into the parking lot, where they would get into Freddie's mom's van (It had taken an uncanny amount of begging and promises of numerous puzzles to get his mom to agree to this. She had even made Freddie take five safety road tests with her). "I mean, we went from-"

But just then a loud clasp of thunder sounded and buckets of rain began to fall from the sky, drenching the couple.

"Dang it!" Freddie frowned as him and Sam rushed back into the lobby, dripping puddles.

"Stupid Seattle!" Sam exclaimed, ringing out her hair.

"Hey!" Lewbert screamed from his front desk. "No dripping in my lobby!"

"Go suck a truck," Sam snapped. She turned back to Freddie. "What are we gonna do?"

"Well the boat that we have the dinner reservations on is covered, so we'll be fine for that," Freddie said. "I have some raincoats and umbrellas upstairs. I'll go run and get them so we can get back out to the car, and then we'll-"

He was cut off as his Pearphone began to ring in his pocket.

"It's my mom," he sighed, looking at the caller ID. He unlocked the phone and put it to his ear. "Hey, mom."

"Fredward Benson!" Sam could hear Marissa's voice shriek. "Don't you even think of taking my car out in this weather! It's far too dangerous for teenage boys to be driving in! You stay right in that lobby mister!"

"Wait," Freddie frowned. "How do you know I'm in-the chip…But mom, Sam and I have reservations we need to get to!"

"You'll miss them!" Marissa said firmly. "You're to stay in that apartment tonight, Freddie, or you can forget about having any T.V. channels left!"

"Well," Freddie mumbled as he hung up his phone. "Looks like we're not going to be going anywhere."

"At least I won't have to be seen like this then," Sam sighed, looking at her reflection in the glass door and seeing her make up streaking down her face and her hair beginning to frizz.

"Well, my mom's at work, so my apartment's empty," Freddie said. "We can just hang out there I guess. I know it's not the ideal anniversary date, but if my mom sees that I left the building she's going to come over and ruin our date anyway."

"It's fine," Sam told him. "Come on, let's go up."

…..

"Man, this Chinese food is amazing," Sam said, spooning some rice into her mouth.

"I know," Freddie agreed, taking a bite out of a spring roll. He put his arm around Sam. "Not exactly what we planned, though, is it?"

"Nah," Sam chuckled. "It's not. But I don't think I mind…we get to stay in and eat Chinese food while we watch movies? Not a bad night for Sam Puckett."

Freddie laughed. "And hey," he added. "You know, you still look absolutely breathtaking tonight. Even after getting rained on."


	355. Chapter 355

**AN-So I know I already did a oneshot where Sam died, but I got some requests to do one where Freddie passes away, so here it is! **

…**.**

_Envelope_

Sam Benson cursed loudly as she dropped the hammer she had been using to try and fix one of the kitchen cupboards, sucking the thumb she had just hit hard.

She jumped down from the counter and picked up the hammer, slamming it back into the open toolbox that sat on the table. She then grabbed a wrench and got down on her knees, opening the cabinet under the sink, trying to figure out where to even begin down there.

She heard her front door open, but she didn't turn around, even as she heard footsteps coming into the room.

"Sam?" she heard Carly's gentle voice behind her. "Sam, what are you doing?"

"Fixing this sink," Sam mumbled, not looking at her best friend. "What's it look like?"

"Sam," Carly sighed. "Don't worry about that right now. It's not important. I can call Spencer and have him come over and do it for you."

"I can do it," Sam mumbled, though she had to admit that she didn't have the slightest clue about anything to do with plumbing. So reluctantly she got to her feet.

"Sit down," Carly said, pulling out a chair for her. "I'll make you some tea."

"No, I need to finish working on these stupid cabinets," Sam said shakily. "And then I need to take a look at that creaky stair, and then-"

"No," Carly said firmly. "Right now you need to sit."

"I don't want to," Sam said quickly, turning away. She knew she couldn't do that. Because the second she did, she would lose it.

"Where are the kids?" Carly asked as Sam heaved herself back on the counter again to give the cabinet another go.

"Upstairs in there rooms."

"Well have you talked to them?" Carly asked. "You know, since Freddie-"

"Did you come over here for anything other than that?" Sam snapped angrily. "Because believe it or not, hearing over and over again that my husband just died isn't _really _the funnest thing in the world."

Carly blinked. "Sam…I'm-"

"Don't," Sam said thickly, turning back around as she could feel her eyes welling up. She pinched them closed tightly.

Carly nodded. "Have you eaten anything lately?" she asked.

Sam shrugged. As strange as it was for her, she honestly couldn't remember her last meal.

"I'll make you some soup," Carly said.

"No, I'm not hungry," Sam said reflexively.

"Well you have to eat something, you're looking really thin and-"

"No, Carly!" Sam said loudly. And then she broke down. She couldn't hold back the tears any longer and she felt them drip down her face onto the old t-shirt she had been wearing for days now. Her shoulders shook and she dropped the hammer for the second time that day.

Carly rushed over, loyally throwing her arms around her.

"I just want him back," Sam whispered through her sobs.

"I know you do, Sam. We all do," Carly said.

"I can't-I can't even sleep at night," Sam said, continuing to cry. "Because he's all I think about. And I can't just sit, because he's all I think about. And even-And even when I stay up doing all this junk I _still _think of him!"

"Of course you're thinking of him," Carly said. "He-He was your husband."

Sam felt her stomach clench as she heard the word 'was'. Was that how she was now going to have to refer to Freddie? In the past tense?

"I just want him back," Sam said again. "This wasn't supposed to happen…not now. Not when we still had so much left to do. It was supposed to happen way, way down the road when we were in our nineties and we were living in some retirement home eating dinner at four o'clock watching game shows all day. Not now…not when he was only forty. Not when he was driving home from the dentist."

"No…it shouldn't have happened now," Carly said. "Freddie didn't do anything to deserve that. He didn't deserve to be hit by that truck."

"But he still did," Sam said solemnly. She wiped her eyes on the sleeve of her shirt, getting back to her feet. "I need to probably take that whole cabinet door off…I don't know what happened to it, but it won't close right."

Carly opened her mouth, but then thought better of it and closed it. She watched her best friend in silence for a moment, wishing she could do something to help her get through this. But how could you console someone who literally had their heart shattered into pieces?

"I'll leave you to it then," Carly said softly.

Sam didn't reply.

Carly gave her one last sad glance before heading out of the house.

Once sure that she was alone, Sam slid off the counter, collapsing in one of the kitchen chairs.

She was somewhat amazed at the fact that she hadn't yet run out of tears. As much as she hated feeling this vulnerable, it seemed that was all she could do these days.

Freddie had always been the only one who could make her feel this way, and it seemed even after he was gone, that power still belonged to him.

"Why'd you have to go?" Sam whispered to the empty kitchen. "Why?"

But of course there was no answer, because the only person who could comfort her right now was never coming back to her. Never again would she feel the warmth of his embrace, of the softness of his lips against hers. She'd never get to see his crooked smile again or smile at the way his nose scrunched up.

"It's not fair," Sam mumbled, kicking her chair back and getting to her feet as she angrily began to pace back and forth in the kitchen. "It's not! It's _not_! It's-"

And then with all the anger she could muster, tears still pouring down her face, she punched the wall. Hard. Her hand slammed through the plaster, but it was if her body was numb to the pain. Because now she knew what real pain was.

Real pain was having someone, someone who had become your _everything_, someone who had become a part of you, snatched away in the blink of an eye without even getting a chance to say goodbye. Having to realize that for the rest of your life, you'd be incomplete.

Sam slid down against the wall, burying her face in her knees, calling out for Freddie, but knowing that she wouldn't hear her husband's voice in response.

…

A few hours later, Sam had found her way up to her and Freddie's bedroom. She sat down on the small trunk that sat at the foot of their bed where they stored spare sheets and pillows.

She stared at the bed. Freddie's side was neatly made, while her side was unkempt, with her pillow scrunched and her half of the covers messed up.

Sam hadn't slept there yet; she had camped out on the sofa downstairs since Freddie had passed away. This was simply how their bed looked on most occasions. That is until halfway through the day when Freddie would come up there, looking for something and stop to make up Sam's side for her. Sam would always tell him how pointless it was for him to that, because the bed was just going to get unmade when they went to bed, but he had always insisted on doing it.

This was where their last conversation took place…it had been so simple. Yet she had been clinging onto his words, savoring them and imprinting them into her memory as she replayed the scene for probably the thousandth time…

"_Why?" Sam yawned, slowly picking her head up as she was awoken by the sound of her husband opening their closet door. "Why are you up at nine o'clock on a __**Saturday**__?" _

"_I have my dentist appointment, remember?" Freddie told her, pulling on a polo shirt. _

"_What's the point of even brushing your teeth and flossing so much if you're just going to pay for some dental assistant to do it for you?" Sam asked, rolling her eyes. _

"_Ha, ha," Freddie said, shaking his head. "You know you really should get to a dentist too, Sam. You're supposed to go every six months, and you haven't been in a good ten years." _

"_I still have my teeth, don't I?" Sam snapped, laying back down on her pillows. "So stop your nagging will you, and let me get back to sleep." _

"_Did I wake you?" Freddie asked. _

"_Little bit." _

"_Sorry," Freddie chuckled. "Anyway, after the dentists I'm going to stop by the drug store and pick up some more vitamins for the kids. You need anything?" _

"_Just sleep," Sam moaned groggily. _

"_Yeah, yeah, I hear you," Freddie smiled. "I'll leave you to your pillows." _

…That was it. That was their last conversation. No 'I love you'. No sweet-talk…just her telling him to leave her alone so she could go back to sleep.

She let out a slow breath and then carefully reached onto their bed and took Freddie's perfectly fluffed pillow.

She could smell his soap on it, and instantly a familiar warmth spread within her as she greedily clung to it.

"I love you," she said softly, feeling some weight lifted from her chest as the words that she had never gotten to say left her tongue. "Forever."

She then caught sight of her hand, which was covered in dry blood from her punching the kitchen wall. Not wanting to risk getting the pillow dirty, she quickly sat it down and got to her feet. She headed back down to the kitchen and turned on the sink, letting the cold water wash over her wound.

She glanced out the window right above the sink, staring out at their backyard. She could clearly see the garden that Freddie had been trying to create for the past few months. He had read an article that kids who really connected with nature often did better in class, so of course he had rushed out and bought all sorts of seeds and plants and fertilizers to try and create a picturesque garden, but he had failed miserably, as nothing had grown…

"_You know," Sam said, coming outside, where Freddie was covered in dirt, struggling to dig a hole with an old shovel. "If you __**must **__have this garden, there are gardeners who actually know what they're doing you can hire." _

"_What? You think I can't plant my own garden?" Freddie scoffed, wiping his sweat-covered brow. _

"_Baby," Sam smiled, rolling her eyes. "You've been at this for like, six weeks, and nothing's even close to growing in here." _

"_You'll see," Freddie smirked. "Soon we're going to have the best garden on the block. In all of Seattle, actually." _

_Sam laughed and handed him a bottle of iced tea and sat down next to him. "Hey, why'd you just buy a bunch of plain bushes and plant in here?" _

"_Those won't be plain for much longer," Freddie said. "They're rose bushes."_

"_I don't see any roses." _

"_Because they're taking their time!" _

"_If you say so," Sam chuckled. _

"_You know," Freddie said, looking over at her. "When I finish this garden, I'm going to buy a hammock and put up between those two trees right there so I can sit and look out on my work, and __**you **__won't be allowed to sit on it." _

"_I'll sit on it if I want to sit on it," Sam said. _

"_Nope," Freddie grinned. "The only way you'll be allowed on is if you're with me." _

"_And what are we going to do out on the hammock together?" Sam asked. _

"_You want a preview?" Freddie asked suggestively, catching Sam by surprise as he quickly pinned her down to the ground and leaned down and kissed her. _

"_Dude, stop!" Sam laughed, though not making any effort to get out from under him, which she could've easily done. "I just took a shower!" _

"_Since when have you ever cared about getting a little dirt on you?" Freddie pointed out. _

"_Very true," Sam chuckled, wrapping her arms around his firm neck, kissing him back passionately. _

"What happened to your hand?"

Sam quickly spun around and saw her seventeen-year old son, Jason, standing behind her.

"Um, I burned it on a casserole dish," she lied lamely.

"Well what happened to the wall?" he asked, looking over at the large hole by the refrigerator.

"Nothing," Sam said, drying her hand on her pant leg. "Are-Are you hungry?"

Jason shook his head. "Not really."

He sat down on the edge of the kitchen table, and Sam gave a sad smile at just how much he resembled his father.

"How are you doing?" she asked softly. A wave of guilt rippled through her as she asked this question. She should've asked him and the others this question a week ago. Had she been selfish, wallowing in her own pain when she should've been busy taking care of her children?

Jason gave a half-hearted shrug.

"Come here," Sam said gently, stepping over to him and putting her arms around him. Jason hugged her back, not saying anything.

"Let me make you something to eat," Sam said, pulling away from him after a moment.

"I'm really not hungry," Jason told her.

"Honey, you've been sitting up in your room for days."

"I have some food up there," he mumbled. "I-I just came out because I wanted to-to-"

"-Do _something_?" Sam finished knowingly.

Jason nodded.

"I know," Sam whispered. "I've been spending the entire morning pretending I know how to fix all the things that are broken in here. The cabinets, the leaky sink…"

"Dad said he would get to those last weekend," Jason said softly.

Sam looked down at her feet. "Yeah…he did." She sighed and walked over towards the fridge. "You're eating a sandwich," she said in a voice that left no room for him to argue. She grabbed the ingredients from the fridge and set them down on the counter. She was slicing the bread when Jason spoke again.

"Do you know what the worst part is?"

Sam turned around and saw that the corner of her son's eyes were glistening. "What, sweetie?"

"None of us got to say goodbye."

Sam closed her eyes. "I know."

"I didn't even _see _him that day," Jason continued in a shaky voice. "I was still asleep when he left the house, and-and I was really busy the day before, so I barely saw him then, just-just at dinner. I never-I never-"

And then he broke down. Her seventeen-year old son, who now towered over her, was crying harder than Sam had seen him cry since he was a young child.

Sam could think of no words to comfort him, so she instead simply sat down next to him and put her arms around him again.

"And-And then even at his funeral," Jason continued. "There were so many people…they all just wanted to talk."

Sam knew what he meant. Freddie's funeral had been hard. She had expected nothing less. But what made it even worse were people who she hardly ever talked to coming up to her every five seconds telling her how _sorry _they were for her lost, and that she must remember that Freddie was in a better place now. More than once during the event, she had retreated into the restroom to hide from it all.

"-We barely even got to say goodbye to him then," Jason finished softy.

_We didn't_…Sam realized slowly. _He's right_.

"Go change out of your pajamas," Sam said suddenly. "And tell the twins and Tyler to get dressed too."

"Why?" Jason frowned.

"Because," Sam simply. "We're going out."

…

When her and Freddie had been dating, nearly twenty years ago, they had driven past the cemetery one time. Sam, seeing how freaked out Freddie was, had insisted that he stop the car so that the two of them could explore…

"_Why you freaking out, Frednub?_" _Sam asked. "You afraid a __**ghost**__ is gonna come get you?" _

"_No," Freddie frowned. "I just don't see why you want to stop at a cemetery in the middle of the night." _

"_It'll be fun," Sam reasoned, hopping out of the parked car and starting towards the iron gates. "It'll be like we're in a horror movie." _

"_Yes…how fun," Freddie mumbled, but he followed Sam anyway. As he always did._

_They walked through the gate, past the many headstones that peeked out of the earth. _

"_Can we go now?" Freddie asked. _

"_You __**are**__ scared," Sam said, though her voice was gentle and non-mocking. _

"_It's just…freaky," Freddie said. _

_Sam held out her hand for him, which he quickly took. _

_Just then they had heard a rustle. _

"_What was that?" Freddie frowned. _

"_Probably the wind," Sam reasoned. _

"_It's not windy." _

_They heard the noise again, and this time, even Sam had to admit it freaked her out a bit, since she couldn't tell where the noise was coming from. _

"_Let's go," Sam said, trying to keep her voice steady. _

_Freddie didn't need a second invitation, and he quickly led her back to their car. _

"_You realize we're probably going to miss the first half of our movie now," Freddie said. _

"_We'll catch it on DVD," Sam chuckled as Freddie pulled out his keys. _

"_I'm holding you to that, Puckett," Freddie smirked as he stuck his keys in the ignition. "Because I really wanted to-oh no!" _

"_What?" Sam frowned. _

"_My __**Galaxy Wars **__key chain," Freddie moaned, looking at his bare keys. "It must've fallen off in there!" _

"_Well, do you want to go back in and look for it?" Sam asked, raising an eyebrow knowingly._

"_No I'm good," Freddie said, starting the car. "Let's get out of here."_

Now she was entering the cemetery for the second time in her life, followed by Jason, Emma, Ashton, and Tyler.

Tyler clung tightly to her arm as the family wove around headstones.

"It's okay, sweetie," Sam told him, stroking his dark hair.

When they reached the back of the cemetery, they found the headstone they were looking for, and Sam's heart broke as she read her husband's name etched on that slab of rock. But she wielded herself to hold back her tears.

"Okay," she said, still staring down at the headstone. "We-I know we never really got a chance to say goodbye to your dad, you guys. A _real _goodbye. But now we're here, and we're not surrounded by a bunch of people looking at us all like we're in a circus like at the funeral. So-So this is our chance. Whatever you want to say to your dad…do it now, when it's just us."

She looked at the four kids, who were all standing still next to her. For the longest time, none of them moved, and then finally, Jason stepped forward.

"Um, dad," he began slowly. "Dad, I-I miss you. A lot. I-I don't really know-"

He looked back at Sam, who gave him a reassuring nod.

"I still have that model train we were working on set up in my room," Jason continued. "You know, the-the one we never got to finish because I got busy with other things. I wish you were here to finish it with me…you told me that when we got it built, you'd put it up in the living room with all of your models." He took a deep breath. "I'm gonna get it up there. I-I've been working on that train for the past few nights…when I couldn't sleep. It-It's looking really good. I think…I think you would've liked it. Maybe-Maybe when I finish it, I'll take a picture or something…leave it here for you. Um, well, anyway...You were always there for me. For everything. When I needed someone to talk to about girls, school…anything. You taught me to drive last year, and-and when I was five you actually taught yourself how to ride a bike just so you could teach me…I love you dad."

And with that he stepped back next to Sam and his siblings.

Emma stepped up next.

"Hey dad," she said softly. "I miss you too. You-You were the best dad ever. Always. Even when you were harping on me to do better in school and stop getting in trouble…And I-I'm going to miss you coming to my soccer games and track meets, cheering for me when-when you barely knew anything about what was going on. I know I said that you embarrassed me when you would do that, but I really secretly _did _like it. And we-we were supposed to have that _Galaxy Wars _marathon soon. But I guess now we-we won't get to. I just…I just wish that you were still here, because-because I love you so much daddy."

She stepped back, and Sam put an arm around her. Emma wiped her eyes on her mother's sleeve, though more tears kept coming from her eyes.

Tyler took a hesitant step forward.

"Daddy," he said, his voice filled with fear and confusion. "I wish you were going to come back. Because then we could still play outside, and we could still go to the Pear Store and see all the cool computers together and you could still teach me how to fence some more so I could get better…because I know you always let me win. I love you, dad, and, um, I drew you this picture." He pulled out a folded sheet of paper from his pocket. It was him and Freddie. He was looking up at Freddie, who he had drawn very large and muscular. Underneath he had written _My Hero_. He set it down at the base of the headstone and then hurried back over to the others.

And then Ashton stepped up, and Sam realized that she had been crying silently the entire time.

"Daddy, I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm sorry I never really appreciated what a good dad you were. You were the best. You-You would stay up all night sometimes and sit in the backyard with me and look through the telescope you got me, trying to find all the constellations you read to me about when I was younger. We'd have _War of Warlords _tournaments and-and we'd always lose track of time and wind up doing that for the entire day. But I still would get mad at you when you would make me change my skirts and take off my make-up for school, or-or when you wouldn't let me go on dates because you said I was too young. And-And when you dropped me off at my friend's party last month, I made you drop me off down the street because I said-I said I didn't want everyone to see how dorky you were. But now I'd give anything for you to run after me right before I walked into school to give me the textbook I left at home, or pick me up from cheerleading practice in one of your _hideous _sweaters. I love you, daddy, and I-I'm going to think about you every day."

She took a step back, crying harder now. Jason hugged her and Sam stroke her hair.

"You guys know how much your dad loved you, right?" Sam said in a cracked voice. "He would do anything for you guys. You all lit up his world, from the second I told him I was pregnant with each of you."

"We know," Jason mumbled, wiping the corner of his eyes.

"Are you going to say anything to him, mommy?" Tyler asked.

Sam nodded. "Yeah…I am."

Her heart beating fast, she stepped forward, away from her children, and sat down at the base of the headstone.

"I never thought we would be separated like this, baby," Sam whispered. "You-You've been in my life for so long…and now, just like that, I'm supposed to go on without you…we had so much left to do together. Graduations, anniversaries, weddings, becoming grandparents, taking that trip to Europe like we always talked about, retiring somewhere warm…You always told me that you thought I was the stronger one in our relationship, but-but that's not true. You were the rock, and-and I don't know how I'm going to do anything without you. I'm scared, _so _scared. What's going to happen when I start to forget the exact shade of brown your eyes were? What's going to happen when I start to forget how those sparks felt every time you'd kiss me? The way your voice sounded?" She gave a small smile. "But I'm never going to forget how perfect we were together." Then she sighed and looked down at her lap. "I _hate _that you left us, even-even though it wasn't your fault. But-But I still love you so much, Freddie. And I'm never going to stop. No matter how much time's going to pass. You were my first love, the first boy who ever made me feel like a princess. Whether it was by just telling me I looked beautiful when I first woke up in the morning, or by-" she looked down at her finger at her gold wedding band and diamond engagement ring. "Or by asking me the best question I've ever been asked."

She wiped her cheeks and pulled a small envelope from her pocket and placed it down next to Tyler's picture.

"When we were dating, I-I wrote this for you. It was the first love letter that I ever wrote," she said. "But I never gave it to you. I guess I thought it was too mushy. But I kept it, and I still remember exactly what it said." She cleared her throat. "Freddie. We've only been together for a few months now, but already I know that these feelings that I have for you don't show up often in a person. I can't even remember a time when I've been as happy as when I'm with you. I'm not the ideal girlfriend. I steal your food, insult your mom and cause you bodily pain frequently, even though I'm trying to hold back on that last one. But you're definitely any girl's ideal boyfriend. You compliment me, you treat me so well, and you go out of your way just to make me smile. I know that I say that you're a complete nub and only tell you 'I love you' when I'm sure no one else will hear it, where as you'd happily shout it from your fire escape, but-but I really do mean it when I _do _say it. And even when I don't say it, I do love you. I don't know what I did to get someone like you in my life, but I know that I'd never feel anything close to how I feel now if I didn't. I love you so much, and I'm blushing even now, just writing that."

She sighed as she finished reciting the letter. "I figured I might as well finally give you that. I just wish I would've had the courage to do it sooner." She reached back into her pocket and pulled out a single red rose and set it down as well.

"This is the same exact type of flower that you gave me on our first date," she said. "And the same type you gave me right before you proposed. You insisted that we have these at our wedding, and you brought me a bouquet of these after I gave birth to each of our kids. And then you'd always bring them to me at random times for no good reason at all. Now it's your turn."

She stood up, dusting the dirt off her pants, watching her tears hit the ground as they slid off her face.

"I love you," she said heavily. "Always."

She turned around and stepped back towards the four children. "Come on," she said softly. "Let's get home."

Without a word, the family began walking back to the car. Sam trailed behind the children a little bit, clutching her thin jacket as small breeze rushed over her.

Just then, she heard a small crack as she stepped her foot to the ground. She frowned and looked down, kicking away some of the leaves that littered the ground. She squinted her eyes as she saw a strange object underneath her foot. She bent down to get a better look at it.

She gasped, covering her mouth with her hand.

It was a _Galaxy Wars _keychain. The same one that Freddie had lost all those years ago when they had come in here on their way to their date. It even had Freddie's name engraved on it, and the small _Girly Cow _sticker she had stuck over Nug Nug to annoy him.

How could it have still been here after all this time? But she didn't even care about that at the moment. She grasped it gently in her hand before sliding it into her pocket and following her kids back to the car.

…

A week later, Sam stepped out into the backyard, carrying a garbage bag in her hand. She lifted the lid of the trashcan and deposited the bag inside, and then began to head back into the house.

But something stopped her.

Right before she was about to step into the house again, she suddenly turned her head towards the garden Freddie had started.

"Oh my God," Sam whispered, slowly walking towards it.

It was beautiful. Everything had suddenly come to life. There were small tweaks of leaves everywhere that Sam knew would begin to bloom into flowers shortly now. But the thing that caught her eyes were the rose bushes that surrounded the garden. Every single one of them had numerous bright red roses on them. Sam ran her fingers over the silky petals of them, smiling to herself.

"You did it, baby," she whispered.


	356. Chapter 356

**AN-So this chapter is a sequel to chapter 336, where Sam buys Freddie a really expensive **_**Galaxy Wars **_**present, and he worries that she may have stolen it, but it turns out that she really sold a rare Fat Cake wrapper that she loved to get the money.**

…**..**

_Poster_

"Well, I did it," Spencer said proudly, getting to his feet and wiping his clay covered hands on his jeans. "I made an entire sculpture in one day."

"Why'd you have to make it in one day?" Carly asked, sitting down on the couch next to Sam, placing a bowl of grapes on the coffee table.

"I didn't, but I was just so excited when one of the owners of this really fancy art shop emailed me and asked me if I could make him a sculpture," Spencer explained.

"What is it?" Sam asked. "A cat wearing a hat?"

"Yeah, that's what the owner told me he wanted," Spencer shrugged.

Carly got up and headed over to the computer on the kitchen counter, where the email from the shop owner was still up. "Um, Spence?" she frowned. "You didn't read this email very carefully, did you?"

"Why?" Spencer asked.

"Because it says, 'Please make me a sculpture of a cat wearing an elegant monocle, and under no circumstances, put him in a hat. I cannot tell you how overdone that absurd idea is, and will simply puke if I am forced to see inappropriate hat usage on any sculpture that passes through my shop door'."

"Huh," Spencer said. "Well, I'm going to go scream into a pillow now. Bye!"

"I wonder what Frothy would look like if I put him in a monocle," Sam said thoughtfully as Spencer retreated to his room.

"I'm sure he'd be the classiest three-legged cat around," Carly grinned.

Just then the front door opened and Freddie walked in.

"Hey, is Spencer here?" he asked.

"No, he gave his cat a hat instead of a monocle so now he's screaming into a pillow because some art shop owner's going to puke," Sam said, giving her boyfriend a quick kiss.

"Ah," Freddie nodded. He opened up his backpack and pulled out a hammer. "I just wanted to give this back to him."

"What were _you _doing with a hammer?" Carly asked.

"I was putting a display shelf up above my bed so that I could stare at my super cool Gold Phaser of Gorwanda that my _amazing _girlfriend gave to me," Freddie said, putting his arm around Sam. "You guys should see it, I have it right next to my poster of Nug Nug."

"Whoa, so you mean your room's even _cooler _now?" Sam asked, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Hey, you're the one encouraging his nerd habits by buying him phasers and stuff," Carly pointed out.

"I actually bought two display shelves," Freddie said, ignoring Sam's comment. "Because I wasn't sure what size would be best. You want the extra one, baby? I thought it'd be nice to set up in your room so that you could put that fancy Fat Cake wrapper on it. I mean, right now you're just storing it in your sock drawer. You love that thing; why not show it off?"

"Um, that-that's okay," Sam said quickly, exchanging glances with Carly. "You can keep it."

"But I don't need another shelf," Freddie said.

"Well then why don't you put up in the studio?" Sam suggested. "We could always use more shelves up there, right Carly?"

"Y-Yeah," Carly nodded.

"You sure you don't want it?" Freddie asked Sam.

"Yeah, I'm sure," Sam said, leaning over and kissing him. "Thanks though."

"Spencer left his toolbox in the upstairs bathroom," Carly told Freddie. "He was trying fix the scale in there after it told him he was ten pounds more than what he thought…you can put the hammer back in there."

"Okay," Freddie said, getting to his feet and heading upstairs.

Once he was out of sight, Carly turned to Sam. "Are you ever gonna tell him that you sold your Fat Cake wrapper to buy him that phaser?"

"No, I told you, he'd make a big deal out of it," Sam said. "Just let have his little toy and I'll start saving up box tops again."

"I still think it was incredibly sweet that you gave up your most prized possession for your boyfriend," Carly smiled.

"Yes, you've told me that ten times already, Carly," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "You know, _maybe _this is why I'm not sweet more often; I have you gushing about it nonstop!"

….

"I still can't believe how insanely cool that phaser looks above your bed," Gibby said as him and Freddie sat down at their table at the Groovy Smoothie.

"I know, right?" Freddie grinned. "How lucky am I to have a girlfriend who'd actually go out and buy me that?"

"The best present I ever got from a girl was that stupid motorized scooter," Gibby mumbled, sipping his smoothie. "Hey, did you ever figure out how Sam afforded that phaser?"

"No," Freddie said. "But-But you know what? I don't care. Sam told me she got it for me _legally_, so I'm not going to press my girlfriend for information. It's insulting to her."

Just then two guys sat down at the table next to him.

"Just show it to me one more time," the smaller of the two boys said.

"Fine, keep your loafers on," the larger boy said, pulling something out of his backpack. "Here, the one-of-a-kind Fat Cake wrapper from the first one ever made."

"Whoa, do you see that?" Gibby said to Freddie, looking over at the table. "How cool is that?"

"Eh, it's probably a knock off," Freddie shrugged. "Don't you remember? _Sam _has the wrapper from the first Fat Cake ever made. She won it in that sweepstakes last year."

"Oh yeah…she made me cut out box tops for ten hours straight," Gibby nodded. "You know, I still can't hold a spoon properly from all those hand cramps."

"I can't believe you managed to get your hands on this," the small boy said, looking at the wrapper with admiration.

"Neither can I," the other boy nodded. "But I was at the pawn shop the other day, looking for a Bah Mitzvah gift for second cousin, and I saw it! The owner said that he bought it off some blonde girl for five hundred dollars. Little did she know that this baby's worth over _ten thousand _dollars. Luckily I had some cash saved up from that line of male lotions I put out."

"Whoa," Freddie whispered, turning to Gibby. "Do-Do you know what this means Gib?"

"Yeah, I need to get on the Internet and find some of that male lotion," Gibby nodded. "Because I think I'm getting this rash and-"

"No!" Freddie exclaimed. "_Sam's _the girl who sold that wrapper to the pawn shop!"

"Why would Sam sell her wrapper from the first Fat Cake ever made?" Gibby frowned. "She loved that thing!"

"Because she needed the five hundred bucks to pay for my phaser," Freddie said. "_That's _how she got the money!"

"Whoa, Sam actually sold that wrapper for _you_?" Gibby said.

"Yeah," Freddie said softly. "She did."

…..

"I can't believe your neighbor just sits out on his porch all day in that kiddie pool," Carly said as her and Sam walked into the Puckett house after school.

"I'm just glad he remember his bathing suit this time," Sam shrugged. "So you really think that vest thing I have would work for Gibby's costume for tomorrow night?"

"Yeah, if you don't want it anymore," Carly nodded.

"Nah, I spilled gravy on it last time I wore it," Sam said.

The girls started upstairs, and just as they were about to go into Sam's room, they heard a loud thud from inside.

Carly frowned. "What was that?"

"Um, I don't know," Sam said. "Frothy was downstairs, and my mom's not home…"

"You don't still have that baby chipmunk, do you?" Carly asked.

"No, you made me get rid of poor little Julio," Sam said.

They heard another thud.

"Maybe we should call the cops," Carly whispered.

"And have them see my mom's illegal workout DVD collection?" Sam said. "No way. Those things are finally making it manageable for me to deal with her bikini parades." She unzipped her backpack and pulled out her butter sock. "If anyone's in there, they're gonna have to deal with the sock."

She slammed open her door, butter sock at the ready to attack any intruders.

"Oh, hey Sam," Freddie said as his girlfriend burst into the room.

"Freddie?" Carly said, confused. "What are you doing here? I thought you had AV club on Wednesday's after school."

"Nah, it was canceled today," Freddie said. He turned back to the wall above Sam's bed, where he was holding a large shelf in place and began to hammer it in again.

"Um, what are you doing?" Sam asked.

"Well I know you said you didn't want my extra display shelf," Freddie said. "But I really think you'll like it. Just wait and see what your fancy Fat Cake wrapper of yours looks like on here, and if you still don't want it, I'll take the shelf down."

"Aw crab," Sam muttered under her breath.

"Maybe you should just tell him you sold your wrapper," Carly whispered to her.

"Maybe," Sam mumbled. "But I-"

Just then Freddie jumped off of Sam's bed, the shelf firmly in place. "Okay," he said, smiling proudly at his work. "Now let's get that wrapper up."

"Um, listen, Freddie," Sam began. "About that wrapper. I sort of-"

But Freddie reached down into his bag and pulled out the one-of-a-kind Fat Cake wrapper and set it right in the middle of the shelf. "There…what do you think, Sam?"

"I-I-" Sam stuttered, her eyes widening as she looked over at Carly, who seemed just as lost as she was.

"I think it looks really good, if I do say so myself," Freddie said. "Really draws your eye when you come into the room, doesn't it?"

Sam sighed. "You know, don't you?"

"That you sold your most prized possession at a pawn shop just so you could get enough cash to buy me the best _Galaxy Wars _item in existence? Yeah, I know," Freddie nodded. "Sam, I-I can't believe you did that."

"It's no big deal," Sam said quickly. "I mean, you're always doing things like this for me."

"Of course it's a big deal," Freddie said gently. "Do you have any idea how much it means to me that you were willing to do this?"

"How'd you find out?" Sam asked.

"At the Groovy Smoothie yesterday, the guy who bought your wrapper at the pawn shop came in and was showing it off," Freddie replied.

"Well then how'd you get it back?" Sam frowned. "Oh man, you didn't actually sit there and give him five hundred dollars for it, did you? Because I didn't _want _you to do that, I just-"

"I didn't pay him," Freddie said quickly.

"Then how'd you get it back?" Carly questioned.

"Well, when the guy was putting the wrapper back in his backpack, I noticed that he had a fencing mask in his bag, so I went up to him and we got to talking," Freddie explained. "Turns out the guy's kind of cocky about his fencing skills. So I challenged him to a quick match down at the gymnasium, and he agreed that if he won, I'd let him come onto iCarly and show off his fencing, and if _I _won, he had to give me the wrapper."

"He _went _for that?" Sam grinned.

"He told me he could beat a tech-nerd like me with one leg tied behind his back," Freddie smirked.

"I think that'd be kind of uncomfortable," Carly commented.

"And you won?" Sam asked.

"Shoosh yeah I did, don't you see the wrapper up there?" Freddie laughed.

"Well…you still didn't have to do that, you know," Sam told him, though she was staring up at her beloved Fat Cake wrapped longingly. "I was fine giving up that-that _treasure _for you."

"And like I said, knowing that means the world to me," Freddie smiled, leaning down to kiss her. "But hey, how often am I going to get a chance to fence for your honor? Or, well, fence for your Fat Cake wrapper?"

"It _is _pretty romantic," Carly pointed out.

"Yeah," Sam said softly, blushing madly. "It is."


	357. Chapter 357

_Loaf_

It had been a gradual process. Looking back now, Freddie realized that it had been a series of small events that had led up to him falling in love with Sam.

She didn't walk into the studio one day with a sudden aura around her that Freddie had immediately been attracted to. She didn't brush up against him while they were sitting on the Shay's couch watching T.V., making him feel a strange new spark that he never felt before.

In fact, it had been such a slow process that at the time, Freddie didn't even know what was going on. Maybe it was because he was distracted by one of his mother's crusades to keep him safe from any or all harm through ridiculous measures, or maybe it was simply because he was a boy, which meant, as Carly put it, he was oblivious to certain things that should be clearly apparent.

Now, though, he understood that those tiny, seemingly insignificant events were really just building upon each other.

There had been the time when Carly had actually succeeded in talking Sam into going to their homecoming dance at school, and he watched her come downstairs, wearing a stunning red dress with her hair up in a fancy bun. His eyes had lingered over her as she headed into the kitchen for some of the leftover roast beef that Spencer had made for his book club ladies while Carly rushed back upstairs to grab her camera. He obviously thought she looked nice; he never thought Sam was _unattractive_, after all. Vicious and violent, yes, but there was definitely no denying that she was a very pretty girl. And then his eyes had been forced away from her as Gibby came into the apartment, announcing proudly that he had gotten them matching bowties, giving him much more concerning thoughts to deal with.

There was that time at the Groovy Smoothie, when him, Sam, Carly and Gibby had been lounging around, sipping smoothies, and T-Bo came over to them and somehow persuaded them to each buy some of the cupcakes he had managed to force onto a stick. As Sam hungrily began to devour her own pink-frosted cupcake, she got a little bit of icing on her nose. Freddie had the sudden urge to reach across the table and wipe it off her, but as he felt his arm rising, he stopped himself, realizing how strange she would find the gesture. And anyway, he found it sort of…cute, that she didn't even realize the icing for nearly ten minutes, until Carly pointed it out. But still, that didn't set off any sirens in Freddie's mind.

And of course there was that time when Spencer arranged for Freddie to compete in a fencing tournament down at the gymnasium again. It had been the first time he had fenced in about two years, and he had been nervous that he had gotten rusty. In fact, he lost the first round of his match. But then Sam, who of course hadn't been on time to begin with, arrived, and for some reason, during the second round, when he heard her in the stands, cheering at the top of her lungs for him, he felt a sudden rush, and easily won in a matter of seconds.

The first _slight _indication that he got that he might have some sort of feelings for Sam that weren't platonic was when Court was appointed (without his approval) to be iCarly's new intern, just because Carly and Sam were so eager to have him around to gush over. It was no secret that Court annoyed the living chiz out of him. The guy was a _moron _who thought the capital of Nebraska was 'N'! But what bothered him the most was that Carly and Sam acted as if he was the most desirable dude on the planet. Though he soon realized, it wasn't exactly _Carly's _infatuation with the less-than-brilliant intern that got under his skin. Sure, he didn't exactly jump up and down for joy while he would listen to Carly talk about how cute Court's abs were, but he was able to just brush it off. When _Sam _would say the exact same things, on the other hand, it was much harder for him to act indifferent, and that confused him. Because three years ago, if Court had shown up, he would've been _furious _that Carly couldn't keep her eyes off him during rehearsals, and might have even gone so far as to _try _and help Sam get together with him, so that Carly would remain single for him. But this time, it was _Sam _he had in mind when he had gone to the Brilliance Bar at the Pear Store and talked to one of the workers, Ashley, about helping him get Court out of his life. Once Court was safely fired, he was still confused about why him being around Sam had bothered him so much, but he didn't dwell on it. He rationalized his actions as being _concerned _for Sam. It was normal for Carly to fall hard for guys every other week; she was more…experienced. He didn't want Sam to rush into anything and wind up getting hurt…that was it.

And Freddie continued to rationalize the little signs that kept popping up. The reason he suddenly couldn't stop thinking about the way her hair had bounced during an iCarly rehearsal as he cut into his mother's tofu loaf was that he had been watching to make sure one of her golden curls didn't get caught in the giant fan Gibby had been working. He couldn't get the image of her signature smile out of his mind was simply because he had been debating with her over the importance of flossing teeth. And the reason that he had been sneaking out to the gym four times a week, building up his muscles (which he told his mother had been caused by him lifting so many puzzle boxes as he organized his closet) was not to _impress _Sam, but rather to finally beat her in arm wrestling. And it had been working. Freddie could finally hold Sam off for just over three seconds before she would slam his arm to the table, which is what would leave his hand tingling after she let go, not the mere fact that she was holding it.

When Brad came back into the picture, just around the time of Ridgeway's annual lock-in, and Sam had suddenly asked to join their project, Freddie was just surprised that she was willingly volunteering to do work for a school project, but then thought nothing more of it. That is…until he tested his Mood Face app on her and it showed that she was _In Love_. And as the only new guy that she had been hanging around was Brad, he logically drew the conclusion that she was in love with _Brad_.

When he saw those words flashing on his computer screen, a feeling he couldn't quite place flooded his body. He didn't know what it was, and as he grabbed his computer and fled from the room, leaving Sam and Brad confused behind him, he actually sat down on the stairs for a few moments, trying to figure out what it was that he was experiencing. But no answer came to him, so he decided to share the news with Carly, who was much better at dealing with that sort of stuff.

Then came the moment, the moment that would change his life forever, when it all clicked. When he realized he was in love with Sam Puckett.

Carly had just found him, fiddling with his computer as he continued to work on his app.

"Well, that was a complete failure," Carly sighed, sitting down next to him.

"What was?" Freddie asked, looking up.

"Trying to hook Sam up with Brad!" Carly exclaimed. "And now I think Sam's mad at me."

"Really?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah," Carly mumbled. "I told you, she's awkward when it comes to liking guys. I mean, I guess I did sort of do a lot of meddling, but it's just so frustrating watching her ignore something that could make her _so happy_. That's all I want for her."

"I know," Freddie nodded. Because he wanted the same thing, of course; for Sam to be happy.

"I should try talking to her," Carly continued. "Once I finish up my project with Gibby…that will give her some time to cool off."

"Right," Freddie said. "Where is she, anyway?"

"I don't know, I think I saw her heading out towards the back patio area, but I'm not positive," Carly said. "Why?"

"Just-Just need to ask her a few questions about our project," Freddie said, getting to his feet. "I'll see you later, Carls."

So he went outside, and Sam was, in fact, there, looking miserable; not like her usual self at all.

He began his speech, hoping that he'd at least be able to help her out, because that's what friend's did, right? And at the same time, he was also thinking about, in the back of his mind, the feeling that still hadn't left the pit of his stomach since he realized she was in love with Brad in the first place, and why it hadn't gone away yet.

And then, she kissed him. It took him completely by surprise; he had been in mid-sentence. But after a second, and the initial shock wore off, he knew.

But of course, as that tidal wave of new information dawned on him, he was able to do nothing more but simply stutter a few incoherent syllables once she pulled away from him.

"Sorry," she mumbled, looking up at him hesitantly.

"It's cool," Freddie said. It was all he could manage. He couldn't even yank his mind out of the brand new sensation it was feeling to yell after her as she turned and quickly ran away. All he could do was stand there, rooted to the ground.

_Sam…_he thought to himself. _I've fallen for her. Hard. _


	358. Chapter 358

**AN-So, just wanted to let you guys know that this is rated T. Again, like I said with the other rated T oneshot I did, I don't think too many of you guys will care, but I still just wanted to give you all a heads up:) This chapter is actually a sequel to chapter 340, where Sam and Freddie discussed having sex for the first time. **

…

_Comet_

"Oh look," Carly said, putting down her cereal bowl as Sam walked into her apartment. "There's the girl who ditched iCarly rehearsal yesterday just to go make out with her boyfriend in his empty apartment. I thought you said you'd come back!"

"I know," Sam said. "I'm sorry. But I was over at Freddie's for a few hours, and then my mom texted me and said that she needed me to bring her over a change of pants to her at the Bingo club, which is like, two hours away."

"Well you could've let me know," Carly mumbled.

"I know…" Sam sighed. "You mad?"

"A little!"

"What if I told you I bought you your very own bingo cage?" Sam smiled, handing Carly the bag that was in her hand. "It's pink and everything."

"Oh…you know Bingo's my weakness," Carly conceded, grinning at her best friend as she pulled out her new pink bingo cage. "You're forgiven."

"Forgiven enough for some of that ham in your fridge?" Sam asked.

"Well, this Bingo cage _is _pink…"

"Awesome," Sam said, hurrying over to the fridge.

"I can't believe you sat at Freddie's apartment just making out for that long, though," Carly commented as Sam began jamming the slices of meat into her mouth. "I know you guys are like, pro-kissers or whatever, but don't you get bored?"

"Pro-kissers?" Sam repeated. "Is there even such a thing?"

"You know what I mean," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Seriously, though, you guys must've broken some sort of record by now."

"Well, actually," Sam said, swallowing her ham. "Um, yesterday at his apartment…we didn't _just _make out."

"What do you mean?" Carly frowned. "What else did you do?"

"Um…is-is Spencer here?" Sam asked quickly.

"No, he left an hour ago," Carly told her. "Him, Socko, and Socko's cousin are going into the woods with their telescope to try and see some rare comet tonight. He won't be back until tomorrow. So what did you and Freddie do that was so much more important than rehearsing out spoon family bit? Wait…oh man, did you guys have another salad dressing fight? Because Mrs. Benson's really going to start putting her foot down about keeping you out of her place when she's not there if you keep messing up her home. I know she doesn't approve of you over there now, but if you keep pushing her, she'll get one of those fancy security systems and then I'll have to go back to watching you and Freddie making out on my couch nonstop."

"We didn't have any fights," Sam assured her. "We-We actually did quite the opposite."

"Huh?"

"We…_you know_," Sam told her.

"What do I know?" Carly asked innocently.

"Ugh," Sam moaned. "I mean that Freddie and I…took things to the next level."

"Like on a video game?"

"Alright, looks like I have to spell this out for you," Sam sighed. "Yesterday, me and Freddie…we did it."

"Oh my God…" Carly said, her eyes widening as she finally realized what Sam was talking about. "Are-Are you serious? You and Freddie had-had-"

"-Sex," Sam finished for her. "Yeah."

"Oh my God!" Carly exclaimed again. "For real?"

"Yes, for real," Sam said. "But look, don't freak out on me, okay? Freddie and I have been dating for almost six months, we _love _each other, and we were totally mature about the whole thing and _discussed _it before we…you know."

"I-I wasn't going to freak out on you like that," Carly said. "I just…wow. That's a big step, isn't it?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "But I mean, like I said, we love each other."

"Were you, um, you know…safe?" Carly asked, somewhat awkwardly.

"Yes, _mother_," Sam chuckled.

"Okay, good," Carly nodded. "Just-Just checking."

"You okay, kid?" Sam frowned.

"Yeah," Carly said quickly. "I'm just a little…surprised, that's all. Um…so how was it?"

"Okay, Carly, are you asking me to tell you _details?" _Sam asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No!" Carly said at once. "Not details of…that. I'd actually like to be able to look at Freddie without puking the next time I see him. No offense."

"None taken," Sam laughed.

"I just mean…was it as good as everyone says it is?" Carly mumbled, looking down at her cereal bowl.

"Well, um, once we figured out what the heck we were doing," Sam shrugged. "Yeah…it was-"she blushed a bit. "-amazing."

"Oh," Carly said simply. "I just thought maybe it had been oversold on T.V. and movies and stuff…"

"Nah," Sam told her. "But…oh heck, we've already made this Girl Talk hour."

"What?" Carly asked.

"Well," Sam said. "It was a _lot _of fun when were actually doing it and all, but the best part was after."

"After?"

"Yeah," Sam said softly. "Just-Just lying there next to him, knowing how much we loved each other. I never felt anything like it, Carls…But don't let that leave this room."

"I won't," Carly said as she turned to put her bowl in the sink.

"Carly?" Sam frowned. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Carly said.

"No, not nothing," Sam said, getting to her feet and walking over to her best friend. "Something's eating at you."

"It's stupid," Carly mumbled.

Sam sighed. "You think Freddie and I rushed into this, don't you?"

"What? No I don't!"

"Well then why are you acting so-so not Carly-like?" Sam questioned. "I thought you'd be all sqeualy and crazy over this. Come on, I told you, Freddie and I both agreed that we were ready, and-"

"Sam, I don't think you and Freddie rushed into anything," Carly cut her off. "I know how much you guys love each other, and-and that it's natural to have _those feelings _for people you care that deeply about."

"Then what is it?" Sam asked gently.

"Okay," Carly began. "I-I _am _really happy for you and Freddie and that you have this really strong relationship. You guys are my best friends! But…it-it's hard sometimes for me, having to have you guys being all coupley around me when I'm all by myself. And lately I've been wishing that I could have someone who literally never wanted to leave my side and could be as happy with. I want to feel what you felt with Freddie yesterday, but it seems like whenever I find a guy I'm interested in, he either doesn't like me back, or turns out to be someone else once I get to know him. And the guys who like _me _all have Pee Wee Baby addictions or other weird issues going on."

"Hey," Sam said loyally. "You'll find someone who makes you feel like Freddie makes me feel. And then it will be my turn to yell at you for making out with him all the time." "Well this person's doing a pretty good job of hiding from me," Carly mumbled miserably.

"Or maybe he's right around the corner, waiting for you," Sam said.

Carly gave a small laugh. "That's a line from that chick flick I forced you to watch last week."

"Is it? I _knew _I heard it somewhere," Sam shrugged. "Anyway, Carly, you're hot. You're funny, you're smart…you don't have any problems finding guys. It's only a matter of time until Mr. Right comes around and sweeps you off your feet."

"Seriously, stop quoting that movie," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"I'm trying!" Sam said. "I think the entire thing seeped into my brain while I fell asleep during it and now it's taking over my mind!"

"And yet you're fine after you watch movies with buckets and buckets of blood," Carly said, shaking her head. Then she pulled her friend into a hug. "But thanks for that pep talk. I really needed it…even if half of it was from _The Memo Pad_."

"Come on, you give me pep talks all the time," Sam pointed out. "And look, if it really bothers you, Freddie and I…we'll try not to be so-so _public _with our relationship around here."

"No, I don't mind if you guys act like a couple around me," Carly said. "But you know, if you were to sort of cut back on the constant make-out sessions…I wouldn't _completely _object to that."

"We'll try our best," Sam promised.


	359. Chapter 359

_Kite_

"Huh? What-What's going on?" Carly said sleepily as she felt herself being shaken awake. She pulled off her sleep mask and turned on the lamp by her bed, and saw her blonde best friend sitting at the edge of her bed.

"Sam! It's two in the morning!" Carly exclaimed. "You know I need to be up really early tomorrow morning to pick up Spencer from his kite convention and-Sam? Are-Are you crying?"

She quickly sat up, now seeing that Sam's eyes were puffy and red and her cheeks were tearstained with more tears streaming down them.

"Sam, what happened?" Carly asked gently, sleep now forgotten as her role as Sam's best friend began to take over her. She grabbed some tissues from her nightstand and wrapped her arms around her.

Sam didn't answer as her shoulders continued to shake.

"Did something happen with your mom?" Carly asked hesitantly. "Is she okay? Did you guys have another fight?"

"No," Sam whispered. "It's not her. It's-It's Freddie."

"Freddie?" Carly repeated.

"He-He broke up with me," Sam said shakily.

"Oh no," Carly mumbled, hugging Sam even tighter.

"It was all my fault," Sam said, wiping her eyes off with one of the tissues Carly had given her.

"Do-Do you want to talk about it?" Carly asked slowly, not wanting to force her to bring up the clearly painful event, but at the same time curious to know exactly what it was that caused such a rift between the seemingly happy couple.

"We were over at his place," Sam began softly. "You know, since-since his mom is working the graveyard shift at the hospital, and I told him to grab me my Peppy Cola bottle from my backpack, and when he looked inside it, he found…he found his Pear Company Internship application in my backpack!"

"Huh?" Carly frowned. "I thought he filled that out and sent it in like, two months ago."

"No, I-I told him I would send it for him back then," Sam told her. "But I didn't, which is why he won't get the Internship."

"You _forgot _to send that in?" Carly said, trying not to sound too accusing at the moment.

"Um, yeah…forgot," Sam mumbled, her voice still weighed down by the lump that had risen in her throat. "And when Freddie realized that, he-he got really mad. He said that Internship would've guaranteed him a job right out of college, and that he had been looking forward to going to it for the summer. I-I said it was no big deal, that it was just some-some stupid computer gig, and then he said…he said that I never cared about what was important to him. That I never stopped to think about _his _feelings. And then he said…he said that maybe we should take a break from us."

As she said those words, she let out another sob, and Carly tried to soothe her.

"Aw, Sam," she said. "It's-It's going to be okay. A break doesn't necessarily mean that you guys are broken up for good."

"You didn't see Freddie's face when he said that," Sam whispered. "He never looked like that before in his life…he was really mad at me, Carly. I-I screwed up big time, didn't I?"

"N-No," Carly said lamely. "It was an accident, Sam. You didn't mean to not send his application."

Sam mumbled something that Carly couldn't quite make out.

"What?" Carly asked.

"It wasn't an accident, okay!" Sam said loudly.

"W-What?" Carly frowned. "You mean…you didn't send his application on purpose? Why?"

"I don't know," Sam muttered. "But I went to the mailbox right outside the building when I was leaving here after he gave me the application, and I was about to put it in, but-but then I didn't."

Carly didn't say anything. Normally, she probably would've given Sam a lecture about her little stunt, and how it was unnecessary, but seeing Sam crying this hard in front of her, seeing her tears actually falling onto her shirt, leaving tiny water marks on he fabric, pushed that instinct away.

…..

The next morning, after Carly had woken up and picked up Spencer, she sat down on the couch, eating a bowl of cereal she had just poured for herself. Sam was still asleep up in her room, after finally crying herself to sleep at around four in the morning. She knew she had a long day of best friend therapy ahead of her to try and make Sam feel even a little better. Maybe they'd take a trip to Build-A-Bra or buy a few logs of raw cookie dough to eat while they watched Sam's favorite movie, _The Revenge of the Mutant Banshees_.

Just then she heard a knock at her door, and she set down her bowl to answer it.

"Freddie?" Carly said, opening the door to reveal the tech-producer. "Since when do you knock?"

"Um, well, you know," Freddie mumbled. "I just wanted to make sure-Is Sam here?"

"She's passed out upstairs in my room," Carly assured him, letting him into the apartment.

"Oh," Freddie nodded. "And, um, I'm guessing she told you what happened last night, right?"

"Yeah," Carly sighed. "I know you two broke up."

"Ah," Freddie said. "So…are you mad at me? You and Sam are best friends, I don't blame you if you take her side."

"I'm not taking anyone's side," Carly said firmly. "Both of you are my friends, and I don't want that to change."

"So you aren't going to sit here and yell at me?" Freddie frowned. "You're not going to tell me I was a jerk or anything?"

Carly shook her head. "Freddie…I-I could see why you got angry with Sam last night. It sucks that you two broke up, but I don't think you were necessarily a _jerk _over it."

"Really?"

"Really," Carly nodded. "But obviously I'm going to be there for Sam too. She-She _was _upset over you breaking up with her. And even though I may not agree with what she did to your application, I hated seeing her that way, and felt terrible for her."

"She-She was really upset?" Freddie asked softly, looking down at his feet.

"Yeah, she was," Carly told him.

"Well…I feel bad about the break-up too!" Freddie said. "But, I mean, Sam does this sort of thing _all the time_. She did it with my N.E.R.D camp application-"

"That was before you guys started going out, and she _did _apologize for it," Carly pointed out.

"I-okay," Freddie shrugged. "But just last week she used my Physics homework to wipe up the Chile she spilled on her shoes. And remember when she traded my Pearphone for a gross of churros?"

"I know," Carly said. "But, you-you always knew Sam wasn't exactly the traditional girlfriend. And she _did _egg your Physics teacher's car so that he'd get distracted and forget to collect your homework and she actually _shared _her churros with you."

"I thought you weren't taking sides," Freddie mumbled.

"I'm not," Carly said quickly. "I just want to make sure you know that Sam isn't out to ruin your life or anything. She _does _need to learn to maybe be a little bit more…considerate of your feelings, but at the end of the day, she always still cared about you."

"I-I know she never did any of those things to intentionally hurt me," Freddie said heavily. "But Carls, this was just the last straw. I've been dreaming of that internship in California for forever, and now I won't get to go because Sam never sent in my application like she told me she would."

"Can't you apply again next year?" Carly asked.

"I guess," Freddie shrugged. "But I really wanted to go this year. Spending ten whole weeks in California learning all about the latest Pear Company developments-"

"Ten weeks?" Carly frowned. "I thought this internship was only for like, _two _weeks."

"No, it'd be the entire summer," Freddie said.

"Oh…" Carly said. "Now I get it."

"Get what?" Freddie asked.

"Now, I'm not defending Sam, and what she did," Carly said. "But I'm pretty sure now that the whole reason that application never made it to California was because Sam didn't want to have her boyfriend, who she loves, that far away for that long. She would've missed you, Freddie."

Freddie didn't reply.

"Ten weeks is a really long time to be away from someone you care that much about, Freddie," Carly said gently. "Trust me, I know."

"Well-Well why didn't she _tell _me that then?" Freddie said. "Didn't she think I'd miss her too? Of course I would've! But we could've found a way to make it work. She could've come down and visited or I could've come back up for a weekend. We could've texted and called and web chatted-"

"She should've talked to you, instead of just not sending in your application," Carly agreed. "That would've been the best solution. But Sam…she doesn't always think things through entirely before acting on them."

Freddie sat down on the couch. "Yeah, she never did, did she?"

Just then his phone began to ring, and he pulled it out of his pocket and answered.

"Hello?" he said.

"Hello, is this Fredward Benson?" a lady on the other line said.

"Yes, this is he," Freddie nodded.

"Well I'm calling from the Pear Company Young Interns program, about the status of your application," the lady told him.

"My-My application?" Freddie frowned, confused.

"Yes, I just got a call from an Officer Regina Goodbody," the lady continued. "About the mailbox robbery that occurred near your apartment building."

"Mailbox robbery?"

"Yes, Officer Goodbody called me about an hour ago informing me that the mailbox you deposited your application for our program in was robbed by a gang of thieves, and therefore, we never received your application."

"Oh, well…what?"

"Now, you know of course that our deadline for receiving applications was yesterday, but under these, horrible, horrible circumstances, I'm able to offer you another week to have your application to us if you still wish to apply."

"Are you serious?" Freddie exclaimed, jumping to his feet. "Of course I still want to apply, thank you! I'll have that application in the mail to you as soon as possible."

"Perhaps you'll want to use a more reliable mailbox," the lady told him. "Mailbox thieves…just when you thought the world couldn't get any more cruel."

"Who was that?" Carly asked as Freddie hung up.

"A woman from the internship program," Freddie said. "I-I have an extension for my application…She said that _Regina Goodbody_ called and told her about a mailbox robbery that kept my first application from getting to them"

"Regina Goodbody?" Carly repeated, smiling.

"I can't believe she did this," Freddie said softly. "She-She really does care."

"I told you," Carly said. "Wait…you _do _know who Regina Goodbody really is, right?"

"Yes, I know!" Freddie said. "Hey, you said-you said Sam was up in your room?"

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "She's up there."

Without another word, Freddie started up the stairs.

When he reached Carly's bedroom door, he knocked softly before gently pushing the door open.

He saw Sam lying on Carly's bed, but she was not asleep. She was staring up at the ceiling.

"Hey," he said, causing her to turn her head and look at him.

She quickly sat up pushed her hair out of her eyes. "H-Hey," she said hesitantly.

Freddie sat down at the edge of the bed. "So, um-"

"I'm sorry," Sam said before he could even get any more words out. "I didn't really get a chance to tell you that last night, but um, I just-I wanted to say it now. I'm sorry that I didn't send in your application like I told you. I knew how much you wanted that internship, and I should've made sure it got mailed. I-I don't blame you for dumping me…"

Freddie sighed. "Well, um…thanks for that apology," he said.

"Yeah, well…you can leave now," she said, her voice shaking. "I-I want to get back to sleep."

"I got a call from the intern program," Freddie told her, not budging from his spot on the bed. "And I can still send in my application."

"Oh?" Sam said, trying to sound surprised, but Freddie quickly saw through the charade. "Well, that's-that great then. You can still go."

"Yeah, it was the weirdest thing, actually," Freddie said. "Apparently, there was a mailbox robbery at the mailbox by the building. I don't think I've ever heard of a mailbox robbery. Well, other than in that episode of _Girly Cow _you and me watched the other night."

"Seriously, can you just leave now?" Sam asked softly.

"And the officer's name was Regina Goodbody," Freddie continued. "Now, that name sounds really familiar, don't you think? Wasn't it…wasn't it the name you used when we went to L.A. with Carly?"

"So what's your point?" Sam snapped.

"You called and made that story up so that I could still send in my application," Freddie said.

"Well…whatever, so what?" Sam mumbled. "You were really upset last night when you found out you weren't going to even have a chance of going, and-and I don't know, I'm not _totally _vicious. I just thought you deserved to go still."

"That was really great of you, Sam," Freddie said. "So thank you."

Sam shrugged. "It wasn't that big of a deal," she said, looking down at her lap. "Just me fixing something I messed up…it's not like I actually really did anything nice for you like you always did for me…back when we were dating."

Freddie let out a deep breath. "Sam…maybe-maybe I overreacted last night."

"No, you didn't," Sam said, looking up. "I mean, you were right. I-I don't always think about your feelings when I do something. I guess that's what made me such a crummy girlfriend, huh?"

"I never thought you were a crummy girlfriend," Freddie told her earnestly. "Sure, there were times when my blood pressure sort of…sky rocketed, but I know that you still cared about me. And what you just did with the Pear Company proves that. You are an _amazing _girlfriend."

Sam raised an eyebrow. "_Are_? Aren't we, you know, broken up?"

"If you still want us to be, s-sure," Freddie nodded. "But…I already told you, I might have overreacted last night when I said we should take a break. It was more of a heat of the moment thing, and I-I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Sam told him. "It _was_ my fault." She nervously began playing with the corner of Carly's pillow. "So, um…are we, you know…good?"

Freddie moved his hand so that it was now cupping Sam's. "Yeah. We're good. I don't know what I would do without a little craziness in my life."

Sam gave a small laugh, and Freddie slowly leaned down and placed a kiss on her lips, which she quickly reciprocated.

Once they broke away, Sam moved closer to him.

"Hey, um…listen, though. I-I'm gonna really try and be a little more…considerate, okay?" she said. "You know, not try and make your blood pressure sky rocket every day. Maybe just on special occasions."

Freddie chuckled. "Well I appreciate that."

"Just-Just know that I always care about you," Sam said.

"I know you do, and I care about you too," Freddie told her.

"And-And just so you know, the reason I never sent your application was because, well…I didn't want to lose you for the entire summer," Sam said slowly. "It was selfish, but, it was never just to be mean to you."

"Hey," Freddie whispered, tilting her chin up. "You're never going to lose me. I love you, Sam. You're not a traditional girlfriend, but you definitely are the only girl for me."


	360. Chapter 360

**AN-So this is another Sam&Cat/iCarly crossover. This one includes Carly this time. I was actually really excited when I got this request, because as much as I want a huge Seddie reunion on the show, I'm also sort of curious as to if they'll bring back Miranda for a few episodes. I mean, not that I'm not a fan of Sam and Cat's friendship (I really am, I think they balance each other out nicely), it's just in my mind, there's no way Sam could replace Carly as her best friend, and I don't think Dan would want that either.**

…**.**

_Mud_

"What? No way, seriously?" Sam said, smiling widely as she talked on her Pearphone.

"Um, Sam?" Cat said, walking into their apartment from the back door, accompanied by a small boy who was covered in mud. "Why was Dublin out back playing in a pool of mud?"

"When?" Sam said into her phone, ignoring her roommate. "Whoa, this weekend! Holy chiz, that's so great!"

"I just don't think his mom would like it if she picked him up and he was covered in mud," Cat continued, grabbing a sponge from the sink to begin cleaning the child off. "Parents usually don't like muddy kids. My mom and dad never liked it when my brother played in the mud, because he'd always build himself a mud village and never want to come into the house because he was too busy ruling over his empire."

"Hold on…both of you?" Sam exclaimed. "Dude, this is amazing!"

"Did I lose my voice?" Cat asked Dublin, confused. "Am I just hearing my Head Voice right now? Oh no! I don't like my Head Voice that much, it's mean to me sometimes!" She clutched her head.

"Hang on, my roommate's losing it," Sam said, rolling her eyes. She covered her phone's speaker with her hand and looked over at Cat. "Hey! Stop freaking out, will you?"

"You can hear me!" Cat cried happily, throwing her arms around Sam. "Oh thank goodness, I was getting really scared."

"Yeah…I'm pretty scared now too," Sam frowned, pulling Cat off her. "Wash the kid off, will you? I had him entertained perfectly outside making some mud pies. He's your responsibility now."

"Kay kay," Cat said brightly, taking Dublin's hand. "Come on, Dublin, I'll go hose you off."

"Anyway," Sam said, returning to her phone call as Cat went out back. "I can't believe you and Freddie are coming out to L.A. finally, Carly! I get to see my best friend and boyfriend again! My apartment's kind of small, though. You can share my bed if you want, and we can kick Freddie out to the couch, or I think I saw some camping beds out in our storage unit the other day I can lug in here and-"

Just then she heard a scream from the back porch, and then a thud, and a second later, Cat hopped back into the apartment, covered in mud and hopelessly tangled in the gardening hose.

"I made a mistake," she said weakly.

"Oh…I've got to go," Sam said, holding back a laugh. "I'll talk to you later, Carls." She quickly hung up her phone and tossed it onto the couch. "Okay, what happened here?"

"I don't know," Cat said as Sam began to untangle to hose from around her. "It's all a blur."

"Yeah, I'm sure you have plenty of blur memories in that tiny little head of yours," Sam nodded. "Oh, guess what?"

"Does it have anything to do with pineapples or the number forty six?" Cat asked.

"What? No!"

"Okay good, because last night, I had this dream where-"

"Hey, I thought we agreed you keep your weird dreams to yourself!" Sam cut her off. "I still can't look at ice cube trays the same way."

"Me neither," Cat shuddered. "So what were you going to tell me?"

"Oh, right," Sam nodded. "My best friend and boyfriend are coming here to visit! Carly and Freddie!"

"Oh, from iCarly!" Cat said excitedly. "I can finally meet them?"

"Yeah!" Sam said. "Carly flew back to America last night for her granddad's birthday party, and she has the next two weeks off from her fancy Italian school, and Freddie's psycho mom is meeting with some state person this weekend to try and get him to pass a law banning dogs in Seattle because they attract ticks…"

"Your boyfriend's mom sounds really weird," Cat laughed. She looked over at the clock in the kitchen. "Oh, it's almost six! We need to pick up the pizza for dinner in ten minutes. I'll ride my bike over there now."

She headed towards the front door.

"Hey Cat?" Sam called after her.

"Yeah?"

"You're still covered in mud."

"Huh? Oh man! I forgot."

…

"Now see, Henry, this is a picture of a dump truck," Cat said, showing a flashcard to the four-year old boy they were babysitting.

"Which is what your mother looks like," Sam added.

"Sam!" Cat whispered.

"What, you know this kid's mom's a nut," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Yes, but she's scary," Cat said. "And last time we babysat for her, she yelled at us that we didn't stimulate Henry's mind enough."

"So you're teaching him about trucks that dump garbage into a large pile?"

"No, I'm teaching him about all trucks!" Cat said happily, flipping over the next flashcard. "This is a fire truck!"

"Which is what your mom _sounds _like," Sam grinned at the boy.

"Sam," Cat whined. "I don't want to get yelled at again!"

"Fine, I'll stop," Sam conceded. "But for the record, you wouldn't last ten seconds in juvie."

"Is that a night club?" Cat asked.

"Um…no," Sam frowned. "It's prison for kids, sort of. It's like-"

Just then the doorbell rang, cutting her off.

"Ding dong," Cat said, picking up a new flashcard.

"Oh, yes!" Sam said, jumping up and running towards the door. "That's them!" She opened the door, but instead of seeing Carly and Freddie, she instead was met with Dice. "Oh, it's you," she frowned as the boy entered.

"You know, some people might take that as an insult," Dice said.

"Good," Sam said. "So why are you here? I thought you were Carly and Freddie."

"Because I thought you ladies might like to see what I have here in my bag," Dice said, patting his backpack.

"Is it Bibble?" Cat exclaimed, throwing her flashcards to the ground as she ran over to Dice and grabbed his shirt. "Please tell me it's Bibble!"

"Um, no," Dice said, quickly backing away from Cat. He pulled out a game case from his bag. "It's Rap Attack II!"

"Whoa, no way!" Sam said, taking the game. "I thought this didn't come out for another three months."

"I know a guy," Dice told her.

"Me too!" Cat said. "His name is Antonio, and he sells mustard packets across from my school, and-"

"Ignore her, she had a hose mishap the other day," Sam told Dice.

"Again?" Dice sighed, shaking his head.

"Hoses are tricky," Cat defended.

Just then the doorbell rang again.

"Ding-" Cat began.

"No!" Sam said firmly as she raced back to the door. She slammed it open, revealing none other than Freddie Benson and Carly Shay.

"Oh my God! You're here!" Sam said happily, throwing her arms around Freddie's neck, giving him a kiss.

"Hey, baby," Freddie smiled, putting his arms around her. "I've missed you so much. These past few month have really been-"

"Carly!" Sam exclaimed, quickly pushing Freddie aside as she hugged her best friend.

"Sure," Freddie sighed, trying to regain his balance.

"Sam!" Carly cried, returning Sam's embrace. "I can't believe I'm here! We haven't seen each other in like, four months!"

"I know, it's crazy!" Sam nodded. "So how's Italy? How's living with your dad? How are the guys? Are they as hot as everyone says they are?"

"Um, hi!" Freddie said.

"Oh come here, you nub," Sam laughed, grabbing her boyfriend's hand and giving him another quick kiss. "You know I missed you too."

"I think this calls for a group hug!" Carly smiled, holding out her arms.

"That's right, Shay," Sam said, rolling her eyes as the three teens huddled together. "Use that while I'm in a good enough mood."

"Wow, iCarly reunited," Dice said, pulling out his phone and snapping some pictures. "I got to be able to make some serious dough off of these pics."

"Um, Sam?" Carly frowned as the three of them pulled apart, looking over at Dice and Cat. "You want to introduce us to your friends there?"

"Oh, yeah," Sam said. "Carls, Fredhead, this is Dice, the spunky kid who lives in this building."

"Spunky?" Dice repeated. "I guess that's new."

"And this," Sam said, putting her arm around Cat's shoulder. "Is my roommate Cat."

"Hi!" Cat said brightly. "Wow, it's so weird seeing you guys not in my computer screen."

"Nice to meet you," Carly smiled.

"And, um, who's that?" Freddie asked, looking over at Henry, who was sitting quietly on the couch.

"Oh, that's just Henry, we're babysitting him," Sam explained.  
"I'm teaching him about trucks!" Cat said proudly.

"Wow, that-that's great," Freddie nodded.

Just then a tall woman stomped into the apartment through the still-open front door.  
"Henry!" she barked. "Come on, we're tardy!"

"Eep!" Cat squeaked, jumping behind Sam.

"And was your mind _stimulated_ today?" Henry's mom asked the boy as he ran over to her.  
"I learned about trucks!" Henry said happily. "I like trucks, mommy!"

"Liking trucks will not get you into an Ivy League school, Henry!" his mother snapped.

"Lay off the kid, will you?" Sam frowned. "He's _four_."

"I will not lay off, I will lay _on_!" Henry's mother said firmly. "Properly educated children become properly educated adults, who don't make stupid decisions…like adopting uncanny hair colors!"

She grabbed her son's hand and marched him out of the apartment.

"Well she seemed pleasant," Carly commented.

"Eh, that was her on a good day, honestly," Sam sighed. She turned to Cat. "See? Now aren't you glad we did that _thing _to her?"

Cat giggled. "Yeah, I don't feel that icky anymore. Especially since she insulted your hair color."

"Um, what-what exactly did you do to her?" Carly frowned.

"We just…never mind," Sam laughed. "It's probably best you don't know much about it. For legal purposes…"

"Good to see my girlfriend hasn't lost her edge," Freddie chuckled, leaning down to give Sam another kiss.

"Okay, gross!" Dice said. "I haven't reached puberty yet, you know. That's still disgusting to me!"

"Then close your eyes," Sam told him. She turned back to Freddie. "And I have to do those sort of things every once in awhile. That one over there is always on my case about behaving."

"Well if you do anything too bad, you'll get kicked out and we won't be best friend roommates anymore," Cat pointed out.

Freddie saw Carly's eyes widen for a moment next to him, but she quickly regained her demeanor. "So," Carly said, clapping her hands together. "I'm assuming it's almost time for Sam's seventh meal of the day…any chance of us going out to one of those cool Hollywood restaurants that are always swimming with celebrities? My dad gave me some extra spending money for this trip, so it's my treat!"

"Wow, that's almost enough to make me forgive the guy for snatching you up and taking you to Italy," Sam said. "Hey, you know where we should go? Botts restaurant!"

"Botts?" Freddie repeated.

"Oh yeah, I love that place!" Cat nodded. "It's so cool, they have robots serve you your food!"

"Okay, that sounds really amazing," Carly grinned. "I'm down for that."

"Hey, robot servers…" Freddie said, taking Sam's hand. "That was sort of the idea behind that Fredbott bit I did on iCarly that one time."

"Oh yeah, Unfunny Robot!" Dice nodded. "I saw that!"

"That wasn't his name!" Freddie exclaimed.

"It's okay, baby," Sam said, patting his shoulder.

…

"Man, am I full!" Carly said as the four teens arrived back at Sam and Cat's apartment. "Those robots really know how to cook a chicken."

"I think one of them was flirting with you, Carls," Sam chuckled.

"Well how flattering," Carly smiled.

"I just wish the robots would give me my ketchup," Cat said sadly.

"I offered you some of my purse ketchup," Sam reminded her.

"I thought you only carried purse barbecue sauce," Freddie pointed out.

"Yeah, but there are just a lot of times out here when you really need to soak something in ketchup," Sam said, flopping down on the couch between Carly and Sam. "Oh, by the way, when I'm out showing you guys L.A. tomorrow, remind me to stop and pick up some more mustard…I think I'm running low."

"Yes, we wouldn't want your portable condiments station to be incomplete," Carly said, rolling her eyes playfully at her best friend.

"You guys should go see the Hollywood sign," Cat said.

"Oh yeah, I've always wanted to see that," Freddie nodded.

"You're not going to come with us?" Carly asked Cat.

"No, I have to babysit for some little girls," Cat replied. "They're really sweet though, so I'll have fun still…unless they chase me again. I don't like to be chased."

"Oh yeah, they're chasers alright," Sam said. "Just feed them a lot of junk food and that will weigh them down. Thanks again for watching them by yourself, by the way."

"What are roomies for?" Cat giggled, hugging her.

"Yeah…that didn't really call for a hug," Sam sighed. "And don't you remember our two-hug-a-week policy? You've already got your hugs until next Monday!"

"You have a two-hug-a-week policy?" Freddie smirked. "So I guess that means we're done then."

"Nah, that only applies to Cat," Sam smiled, getting her feet and wrapping her arms around him. "You get extra."  
"Aw, well yay," Freddie laughed.

"Oh, and Carls? You should check out the big mall they have here too," Sam said. "Four stories, over one thousand stores, and they have a _huge _Build-A-Bra. We should go there after we do some sight seeing…I need a strapless bra for tomorrow night."

"You know I'm a sucker for big malls," Carly smiled.

"What's tomorrow night?" Cat asked.

"Freddie and me are going on our first date in four months," Sam replied.

"Yup, I spent hours looking up the best date spots in L.A. online on our way down here, and I found the perfect place," Freddie said proudly.

"You mean _I _found the perfect place," Carly corrected him, swatting his shoulder playfully. She turned to Sam. "Your boyfriend wanted to take you to this restaurant called _Galaxy Fortress_."

"Oh man, that's the restaurant that's supposed to be all sci-fi themed, right?" Sam cringed.

"It looked really cool, though," Freddie defended.

Sam turned to her best friend. "You are a _life saver_."

…

"I can't believe we were actually three feet away from Monty Dublio!" Freddie said, still star struck, as him, Sam and Carly walked through the mall the next day.

"Who is he again?" Carly asked, amused.  
"The actor who stared in _The Great Train Getaway_!" Freddie exclaimed. "You haven't seen that movie?"

"No, is it any good?"

"Nope," Sam said. "No explosions fight scenes or monkeys. Just a bunch of dudes running after a train."

"Well it's better than some lame zombie movie," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Hey! Zombies rule!" Sam snapped.

"See, now this is just like old times," Carly sighed happily. "Oh Sam, look! Build-A-Bra!"

"Nice, they have a sale on those titanium hooks," Sam said.

"Oh…cool," Freddie said.

Sam and Carly turned to him.

"You don't want to go in, do you?" Sam asked knowingly.

"Hey don't worry about me," Freddie said quickly. "You girls go have fun."

"Well there's a comic book store over there," Sam said, pointing to a shop a few feet away from them. "Why don't you look in there while Carls and I shop?"

"You wouldn't mind?" Freddie asked.

"Nah," Sam smiled. "Besides, we have all night tonight to spend time together on our date."

"Awesome," Freddie said, breathing a sigh of relief. He bent down and gave Sam a quick peck on the lips. "Later!"

"He's such a happy little nerd," Carly commented, chuckling.

"I know," Sam said, shaking her head.

"So," Carly said as the two stepped into the shop. "Is living in L.A. always this fun? I mean, we must've seen at least half-a-dozen celebrities today."

"Eh, you get used to it after awhile," Sam shrugged as they rummaged through a sale bin. "But you never told me about how it is in Italy! Is it fun spending time with your dad? Is the pizza really good? Oh man, I bet it is."

"Yeah, the pizza's great," Carly grinned. "And I love spending time with my dad too."

"What about school?" Sam asked. "Is it just as boring in Europe?"

"It's actually really cool," Carly told her. "But, you know, I'm still the new girl there. I've met a few people, but sometimes I kind of miss Ridgeway. But what about you and online school? Please tell me you're not letting that go. You need to stay on top your assignments, even if you're not required to actually be at a school, and-"

"Relax, I'm on top of it," Sam assured her. "Cat freaks out if she finds out I'm falling behind, and she nags me until I do my work."

"Oh," Carly said, clearly surprised. "Well, um, good. I just, you know, wanted to make sure. Because back at Ridgeway, I'd nag you all the time and you still wouldn't do your work. But I'm glad you're doing well now."

"Thanks," Sam smiled. "So what else do you do in Italy? You join any gondola racing teams or anything?"

"No," Carly said. "I don't think that's a real thing…But I did join my school's young leader's program, which happens to be headed by a particularly gorgeous boy."

"Good stuff, Shay," Sam nodded approvingly.

"Well how about you?" Carly said. "Babysitting? That's, um, new."

"Right?" Sam agreed. "But I dunno, I guess it's not that bad. It's sort of fun sometimes, actually. Plus Cat does half the work, so it's not all me."

"I just never thought you'd willingly take care of young children all the time," Carly chuckled. "I mean, no offense, but you-you're not exactly-"

"-The most nurturing person?" Sam finished for her.

"Well…yeah," Carly nodded.

"I know," Sam replied. "But I don't think that I'm actually scaring any these kids. They seem to _like _me, it's sort of weird sometimes. I swear, I think Cat's rubbing off on me and making me nicer to children."

"Huh, interesting," Carly muttered under her breath. "I'm glad to see that someone who you've know for a whole four months has already made such an improvement on your behavior. I've only been trying for almost _ten_ years to get you to be a little nicer to people."

"Huh?" Sam frowned.

"Nothing," Carly said quickly. "So you excited for your date tonight? Freddie is, that's for sure. You should've heard him on our way up here."

"Um, duh I'm excited," Sam said. "You know how much I've missed Freddie? It sucks only being able to talk to your boyfriend on the phone or over a web cam."

"Well at least you've missed _him_," Carly mumbled.

"What was that?"

"Just saying how cute these pink straps would look with those purple cups over there," Carly lied. "Hey, so if you want a good strapless bra, maybe we should look over there. What color dress are you wearing?"

"Red," Sam replied. "So I should get a darkish one, right?"

"Right," Carly nodded. "And you could get some of those cool glow-in-the-dark clasps, and-"

Just then Sam's phone buzzed. She pulled it out of her pocket and checked her text messages.

"Oh, it's Cat," Sam said.

"Is everything okay?" Carly asked.

"Yeah, she just wanted me to get her a new pink bra," Sam replied. "Because we sort of ruined hers…lime Jell-O incident."

"Lime Jell-O?"

"Yeah," Sam said, laughing to herself. "We made this bet…man, it was so worth it, though."

"I bet," Carly said, plastering a smile onto her face.

…

"Whoa!" Freddie said later that evening as Sam stepped out into the living room, donning a dark red dress and black heels. "Sam, I-I-Oh, just come here."

He stepped over to his girlfriend and kissed her deeply.

"You like?" Sam grinned when they pulled apart.

"Absolutely," Freddie nodded.

"Yeah, that dress looks great on you," Carly commented.

"I picked it out!" Cat said proudly.

"We spent _six hours _at the mall the other day looking for this," Sam said. "So you better appreciate it, baby."

"Oh I do," Freddie said, still gawking at her.

"It's the same color as my hair," Cat giggled.

"Yes it is," Carly nodded, trying not to dwell on the fact that Sam complained whenever they would shop for dresses for more than thirty minutes back in Seattle.

"So what are you going to do while me and Freddie are out?" Sam asked Carly.

"I dunno," Carly shrugged. "Maybe I'll bake a cake or something."

"Hey, you should hang out with Cat," Sam suggested.  
"Oh yeah!" Cat replied. "We can raise the roof off this place!"

"Oh…yay!" Carly said lamely.

"We'll have so much fun!" Cat said happily, throwing her arms around Carly. "We'll watch movies and play freeze dance, and pop popcorn."

"Just a warning, she cheats at freeze dance," Sam told Carly, patting her shoulder.

"No I don't!" Cat exclaimed.

"Sam, we should probably get going if we're going to make our reservations," Freddie said, looking at his watch.

"Oh, right," Sam nodded. "Well, see you!"

"Bye!" Carly and Cat said as the couple hurried out the door.

"So what movie do you want to watch?" Cat asked Carly. "We have a ton of choices, except not _Ralph's Rambunctious Rainbow_, because Sam fed that one to a dog named Ralph. She said it was ironic…"

"Um, anything you want is fine," Carly said politely.

"Kay kay!" Cat said. "It will be a surprise!"

"Great," Carly replied, sitting down on the couch.

She had to admit that she liked Cat. She seemed sweet and nice and all, but Carly couldn't help feeling a certain…resentment towards the redhead. Seeing her and Sam together…it was almost like watching _her _and Sam, back when they were living in Seattle and were seemingly inseparable. She had always thought to her and Sam's friendship was everlasting; that no one would ever be able to replace the other in their lives. But the more Carly thought about it, the more it seemed evident that Cat was becoming just as important to Sam as she was…if not more.

….

"-And then when I was thirteen, my Nona bought me a bike," Cat told Carly as the girls sat on the couch, watching their third movie of the night. "But I never got to use it, because it was stolen by some Kindergarten thugs. But then she bought me _another _bike when I turned sixteen, and this one-"

"We're back!" Sam announced as her and Freddie walked through the door.

"Hey," Carly smiled. "How was your date?"

"Well Sam spilled hot sauce down our waiter's shirt, but other than that, it was perfect," Freddie replied.

"He brought me chicken instead of steak!" Sam exclaimed.

"But you shouldn't have poured hot sauce down his shirt," Cat told her just as Carly had opened her mouth to scold her. "That's sort of mean."

"Whatever," Sam said, kicking off her shoes. "So did you and Carly have a good time?"

"Yeah! I was tell her my life story!" Cat nodded. "I was up to the part about my bikes."

"Thrilling," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Anyway, it's almost two in the morning, I'm beat. I think I'm going to-"

Just then Cat's phone dinged.

"Bee-boop!" Cat said, pulling her phone out of her pocket as Carly and Freddie gave her strange looks. "Oh no!"

"What?" Sam frowned.

"Dice got his foot stuck in some new shoe he bought from his guy," Cat said. "They were supposed to make him bounce really high, but they just wound up trapping his foot. He needs help getting it off."

"Ugh, fine," Sam moaned. "Let's go help him." She turned to Carly and Freddie. "We'll be back in a sec, okay?"

"Yup," Freddie said as the two teens ran off. He sat down next to Carly. "Man, I don't know how I'm going to be able to go back home tomorrow. I don't think I can go another four months not being with Sam. When we were on our date tonight, it was the best feeling in the entire world; it was just what I needed."

"Well, I'm glad you guys enjoyed yourself," Carly sighed.

"You okay?" Freddie frowned.

"I guess," Carly mumbled.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"It's just…I thought coming here, the three of us being together again…it would be just like old times," Carly explained.

"It is, though," Freddie pointed out.

"No, it's just like old times for you and Sam," Carly said. "She didn't replace _you_."

"Hold on," Freddie said, wrinkling his brow. "You think Sam replaced you? With Cat?"

"Come on, you can tell they're already best friends," Carly said miserably. "They live together, they started their own business together…this chick even managed to make Sam keep up with her online school _and _improve her behavior towards children."

"Carly, that's ridiculous," Freddie told her. "_You're _Sam's best friend. Her and Cat are really close, sure, but that doesn't mean she likes Cat more. You're _Sam and Carly_, no two friends are closer than you guys."

"I thought so too," Carly said. "But now…"

"So why don't you talk to Sam?" Freddie suggested. "Tell her how you're feeling."

"No, I don't want to make her feel bad or anything," Carly said.

"Carly, I'm dating _Sam_," Freddie reminded her. "If I can persuade her to talk about her feelings from time to time, I can definitely get_ you _to."

Carly gave a small chuckle. "Maybe," she said.

…

The next morning, Carly woke up fairly early. She looked over at Sam, who was fast asleep next to her, and at Cat, who was curled up in her own bed across the room. She didn't think she could go back to sleep, so she quietly stepped out the bed and headed out of the bedroom into the kitchen, where she could see Freddie sleeping on the sofa. She took a banana from the fruit bowl and then headed out to the back patio, sitting down on one of the chairs out there.

She ate her banana, deep in thought, as she watched the sun begin to rise. She didn't even notice the back door open again, or Sam stepping out to join her.

"Why are you up so early?" Sam yawned, snapping Carly back to reality.

"Oh," Carly said. "I couldn't sleep…why are you up early? Has Cat talked you into doing early morning yoga like _I _always wanted to do, but couldn't because you wouldn't come with me?"

"Um, no, Cat screams in her sleep sometimes," Sam frowned.

"Oh," Carly mumbled.

"Hey," Sam said, sitting down next to Carly. "What's wrong? Do-Do you not like Cat or something?"

"Huh? Of course I do," Carly said quickly. "Why wouldn't I? She seems nice."

"Yeah, but it just seems that you haven't really been your usual Carly self around her," Sam shrugged.

"Sorry," Carly sighed.

"You know," Sam said. "We might've been apart for four months, but I can still tell when something's bugging you."

"It's stupid," Carly said.

"Can't be any more stupid than my banjo music obsession that you got me through sophomore year," Sam pointed out. "So spill."

"Alright," Carly conceded. "I just…I feel replaced, okay!"

Sam blinked. "Replaced?"

"I know I can't really complain," Carly sighed. "I mean, if I hadn't jetted of to Italy, you would've never come down to L.A. and we'd still be up in Seattle doing iCarly with you practically living on my couch. But I just-You're my best friend, Sam, but now you have Cat, and-and you still have Freddie, and you have this great apartment with an awesome babysitting service, and-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Sam cut her off. "Back up there, Carls. You think I _replaced _you with Cat?"

"Sure seems like it," Carly mumbled.

"Carly," Sam said softly. "I-I could _never _replace you. You're my best friend; you're practically my _sister_."

"But if you and Cat are already this close after only four months…it's only a matter of time before you'll be saying that about her and not me," Carly whispered.

Sam shook her head. "There's no way. Look, Cat's great. She's fun, she's cool, she's a great roommate and friend, but she's not you, Carls. She doesn't like staying up late watching reruns of ninety's shows, she's about fifty times more girly than you, she's _horrible _with sarcasm, and her favorite letter, get ready for this, is _Q_."

"Q?" Carly repeated, a small smile forming on her face.

"She thinks its pointless little tail is _cute_," Sam cringed.

"Oh God," Carly said.

"Uh-huh," Sam nodded. "And, also, Cat's always busy with her school stuff too. She goes to some performing arts place where she has a bunch of friends who she hangs out with on the weekends and after school when we don't have plans. I mean, Cat and I are really, really good friends, and I'm glad I found her here, but Sam and Cat? They'll never be any match for Sam and Carly."

"You mean that?" Carly smiled.

"You want me to ankle swear on it?" Sam grinned.

"Okay, that's it, you're getting a hug," Carly laughed, throwing her arms around the blonde.

"Ow! Ow! Kind of losing feeling in my sides," Sam winced.

"Sorry," Carly said, releasing her best friend.

"I think Italy's made you stronger, kid," Sam commented, massaging her side.

"Maybe," Carly chuckled.

"Oh, and by the way," Sam said, rummaging in her pocket. "You didn't think you'd get to leave L.A. without spending some quality time with your best friend, did you? Here they are!" She pulled out two tickets.

"What are these?" Carly asked.

"Well, you know how _America Sings_ is filmed here in L.A.?" Sam said.

"Yeah…"

"Well Dice managed to get me two tickets for a complete tour of the studio, _plus _a chance to meet all the judges and last year's winner-"

"Corbin Okeechobee?" Carly gasped.

"Uh-huh!"

"Oh my God!" Carly squealed. "We can get his autograph and touch his hair!"

"I know, so let's move!" Sam laughed.

…

"-And we got restraining orders, but I'm totally okay with that," Carly said several hours later as she lugged her bags by the front door.

"I still don't see the appeal of that show," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Well, you lack culture," Sam said, leaning up to kiss him. She wrapped his arms around his neck. "Do you really need to leave now? Can't you guys stay for another few hours?"

"I wish," Freddie sighed. "But my mom's going to be home tonight, and I need to make sure I'm back before her. She thinks I spent the weekend ironing my pants."

"Yeah, and my flight back to Italy is leaving tomorrow morning from Seattle," Carly said.

"Oh," Sam sighed. "Well, I'm glad you guys came down, still. Even if it was just for the weekend. I promised my mom I'd come home around Christmas time…she can't smash a television on her own. You're coming back for Christmas, right Carls?"

"I wouldn't miss Spencer's magnetic tree for anything," Carly grinned.

"Good, so at least we'll see each other again a few months," Freddie said.

"I know," Sam said, giving him another kiss. "But I'll still miss you guys."

"I'll miss you too, baby. So, _so _much," Freddie said.

"Hey, I'll make sure to send you postcards," Carly said. "You know, so we can keep our hatred of certain alphabet letters alive."

Sam laughed, hugging her best friend. "Take care of yourself, Carls."

"You too," Carly said. "Stay blonde."

"Stay brune," Sam grinned.

"I love you, Sam" Freddie said, planting one last kiss on his girlfriend's lips. "And I'll start my countdown to Christmas now." He turned to Cat. "Nice meeting you. Thanks for letting us stay."

"You're welcome," Cat replied.

"Yeah," Carly said earnestly. "You were a great host. And hey, if you're ever in Florence…give me a call."

"Oh! We could eat gelato!" Cat said excitedly. "It was my brother's favorite, but now he's not allowed to have it anymore because he-"

"So say hey to Spencer and Gib for me," Sam cut her off.

"Will do," Carly laughed.


	361. Chapter 361

**AN-Hey, Guest…um, I don't really know why I use the word 'upset' as a synonym for sad a lot in this story, lol. I just always considered the word to mean 'not your usual self' in terms of how you're feeling, not necessarily mad. **

….

_Butter_

"Ugh, Carls, I see the light," Sam moaned, lying on the Shay's sofa.

"Well then _maybe _next time we go to the lobster shack, you won't take the endless crab leg buffet as a personal challenge," Carly said, rolling her eyes as she brought her best friend a glass of water.

"I set a record," Sam said weakly. "It was worth it."

"Right," Carly nodded.

"Hola chicas," Freddie said, letting himself into the apartment. His smile faltered when he saw his girlfriend clutching her stomach in pain. "Sam? You alright, baby?"

"She's fine," Carly assured him. "She's feeling the after effects of eating five pounds of crab legs in under twenty minutes. Spencer took us to get dinner since we helped him finish his sculpture, and, well, this is the result."

"Hey, crab legs are semi-healthy, at least," Sam mumbled. "People always say seafood's good for you."

"Sure," Carly agreed. "But I think that goes out the door when you pour two cups of melted butter on everything."

"Well, I hope you feel better by tomorrow," Freddie said, sitting down next to Sam. "Because I have the best day ever planned for us. We're going to go see the new _Karate Lad _movie that you've been dying to see, we're going to get some of those Fat Cookies and enjoy them at our favorite romantic spot in the park, and we're going to eat dinner with my mom, and then we'll go look at those new vicious fish the pet store got in, and-"

"Hold on, back up there, nub," Sam frowned, slowly sitting up. "Did you say we're having dinner with your _mom?_"

"Oh boy," Carly sighed.

"Well, Sam, she-she wants to get to know you better," Freddie explained. "We've been dating for a year, and I don't think you two have ever had a legitimate conversation before."

"Um, your mom _hates _me," Sam pointed out. "And for the record, we've had legitimate conversations before. They usually revolve around her screaming at me for trying to yank her baby boy away from her, but-"

"Come on, baby, she doesn't _hate _you," Freddie said.

Sam gave him a look.

"Alright, she sort of does," Freddie admitted. "But that's why this dinner's so important! Once she actually sits down and has pleasant conversation with you, she'll see just how great you really are!"

Sam scoffed. "Yeah, right."

Freddie looked at Carly pleadingly.

"Er, um, Sam," Carly said. "Maybe Freddie has a point."

"Carly!"

"Well, I just think that it's a good idea for you to try and improve your relationship with Mrs. Benson, since you and Freddie have been dating this long," Carly said. "You can't keep considering your boyfriend's mom as just the crazy lady who likes things to be really, _really _clean. And who knows? If she sees that you're making an effort, she might try and be a little nicer to you too."

"Thank you, Carly," Freddie smiled.

"Traitor," Sam mumbled.

"Please, Sam? Just one hour at my place, having dinner with my mom?" Freddie begged.

Sam sighed. "What are we having?"

"Well, Sunday's my mom usually cooks broiled zucchini with a squash glaze-"

"You've got to be kidding me!" Sam exclaimed.

"Well, just fill up before you go over," Carly suggested.

"And afterwards, I promise, we'll go down to the cupcake shop and get you some real food," Freddie said. "So what do you say? For me?"

Sam rolled her eyes. "Okay! I'll have dinner with you and your mom!"

"Thanks, Sam," Freddie said, giving her a quick kiss. "You really are the best, you know that?"

…

"Alright," Freddie said the next day as him and Sam walked back up to his apartment. "Just remember; no talking about anything violent, disgusting, illegal or high in trans fat. And make sure you chew with your mouth closed and keep your elbows off the table. Don't talk about us making out or sneaking out after curfew, and please, whatever you do, don't tell her about your prison record."

"Okay, okay," Sam said as they reached his door. "Jeez, you sure you don't want to go across the hall and borrow Carly for the night?"

"Sam, I'm sorry," Freddie said. "I-I know I'm asking a lot of you, and that it's not really your thing, but I just want my mom to see what a great girlfriend you are."

"Alright, I'll try and behave," Sam told him.

"I know you will," Freddie said. "Oh, and shoes off."

"You're really pushing it, aren't you?" Sam mumbled, but she kicked off her shoes and set them against the hall wall was Freddie pushed open his apartment door. The second she stepped inside, Sam was hit with smells so putrid that they could only be coming from foods that were good for you.

"Mom?" Freddie called, leading Sam into the kitchen. "Mom, Sam's here."

"Oh," Marissa said, pulling a tray out of the oven. She turned to look at Sam, pursing her lips. "How…lovely."

"Hi, Mrs. Benson," Sam said, plastering a smile onto her face. "Wow, dinner sure smells good."

"Thank you," Mrs. Benson snipped, placing some rolls in a basket.

"Mom," Freddie sighed. "Please be nice."

"I am being nice, Fredward," Marissa said. "Just because my only son would rather spend time with a delinquent than the woman who gave him life doesn't mean I won't remember my manners."

"Mom!"

"Dinner's ready," Mrs. Benson said, ignoring her son's comment. "Please disinfect your hands and sit down at the table."

"So," Freddie whispered, grabbing the large bottle of hand sanitizer from the counter. "This is going well so far…"

"Yeah, your mom looks ready to hug me," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Which, by the way, I'm _not _okay with. Ever."

"Just don't take anything she says personally," Freddie told her.

"The zucchini is getting cold!" Marissa yelled from the dining room.

"You owe me," Sam mumbled as the couple headed over to the table.

"Hey, you made rolls," Freddie said, sitting down next to his girlfriend. "You like rolls, Sam."

"These aren't rolls, Freddie," Mrs. Benson frowned. "I'm shocked that you would insinuate that I would serve such fattening food at my dinner table. These are corn fluffers."

"Corn fluffers?" Sam repeated. "Um, what?"

"We combine corn, cauliflower flakes and cucumber and mush them together with rice into a roll form."

"Oh…yum," Sam said, trying not grimace.

"So lets dig in!" Freddie said quickly.

For several moments, the only sound at the table was the clinking of silverware against plates, and Freddie was definitely feeling the weight of the tension.

"Um, so Sam and I were working of some iCarly stuff the other day," Freddie said. "And Spencer told us this funny joke about-"

"Samantha, ladies must hold their utensils as if they are cutting into the softest of silks," Marissa interrupted, looking over at Sam.

"What?" Sam frowned. "I'm not cutting silk…even though I think I'd rather be eating that," she added under her breath.

"You're supposed to hold your silverware daintily," Marissa said, clearly frustrated. "You don't grip it like some wild animal! We use a fork and knife to help us eat food, not saw into hunks of wood!"

"I thought you promised me no rhymes!" Freddie hissed.

"How am I supposed to hold my silverware _daintily _with these weird cloths wrapped around them?" Sam snapped, earning her a look from her boyfriend. "Er…ma'am."

"Those are hand guards, so we won't get blisters!"

"Who gets blisters from a _fork_?" Sam scoffed.

"Freddie happens to have very feminine hands!" Marissa exclaimed.

"So this is a migraine," Freddie sighed, massaging his temples. "Interesting."

Sam looked over at Freddie, who gave her an encouraging nod, and she held her tongue and went back to her plate.

"Um, great-great dinner, mom," Freddie said after a few more minutes of complete silence. "Is this a new squash glaze recipe?"

"I'm glad you noticed, Freddie," Marissa smiled. "I took out that teaspoon of sugar my _Victories for Vegies _cookbook recommends. It just proves that you don't need nasty chemicals or sugars to make a quality meal! Now, Samantha, maybe if you tried to eat a more nutritionally balanced diet, you'd be less inclined to act out in…hoodlum ways."

"Um, mom, she-she actually prefers to be called _Sam_," Freddie said. "Not Samantha."

"Ah, so even your name needs to be butchered," Marissa nodded.

"Hey!" Sam said, narrowing her eyes as she slammed her fork down. "What do you think-"

"So let's talk about our plans for the week, huh?" Freddie interjected quickly. "Instead of starting something that would cause the pounding in my head to intensify. Mom, why don't you start?"

"Well," Marissa said, still glaring across the table at her son's blonde girlfriend. "I have an appointment with my therapist on Monday, then on Wednesday I'm meeting with my Mother's Against Pop Music group, and then Friday I'm taking Freddie to have his fingernails filed down at my nail salon-"

"Wait, mom, I told you I'm busy Friday," Freddie frowned. "Remember? I'm going to hang out at Gibby's and watch the entire _Galaxy Wars _trilogy."

"Fredward Benson!" Marissa groaned. "I can't believe that you'd chose robots and spaceships over spending a little quality time with your mother!"

"Didn't you go over to Gib's and watch those movies _last _week?" Sam pointed out.

"Yeah, but his mom bought him the Director's Cut DVD pack with a whole ninety-two seconds of added features on it," Freddie grinned. "It's going to be like watching an entirely different film!"

"That's ninety-two more seconds of mind-destroying garbage being shoved into your impressionable mind!" Marissa cried. "This is why I locked the sci-fi channel!"

"Dude, ninety-two more seconds of weird space chiz isn't going to do anything to help that movie," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"I still don't see what you see in that movie," Marissa sighed, shaking her head.

"Seriously, it's just a bunch of Nug Nug things running around while some guy chases them with a light up sword," Sam nodded.

"Oh, that Nug Nug," Marissa cringed. "What a ridiculous name!"

"I know, and he has that stupid pet that looks like a dog but isn't a dog because they're in another galaxy and don't have normal things," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "It doesn't make any sense! Nothing in that movie does!"

"And yet it rots young boys' minds," Marissa said sadly. "Oh, Sam, I see you're out of soy milk. Come into the kitchen and I'll get you a refill."

"Oh cool, thanks," Sam said, getting up.

"What-What just happened here?" Freddie frowned, utterly confused, as he watched his mother and girlfriend head off into the kitchen together, insulting Proton Cruisers and Sky Nauts.

….

"Hey! How'd it go?" Carly asked anxiously later that evening as Sam and Freddie let themselves into her home.

"Not that bad," Sam said.

"They bonded over their hatred for _Galaxy Wars_," Freddie mumbled darkly.

"No way, you and Mrs. Benson bonded?" Carly gasped, jumping up to hug her friend. "Sam! Oh my God, that's great, I'm so proud of you! So are you guys all buddy-buddy now? Does she consider you to be the daughter she wanted but didn't get because she got landed with a boy? Oh! You guys should have a brunch date, and then go shopping, or-"

"Easy there, Carlotta," Sam laughed. "Me and Crazy aren't BFF's. Nowhere near that, actually."

"But-But Freddie just said-"

"Eh, we talked about how annoying Freddie's _Galaxy Wars _obsession is, yeah," Sam shrugged. "She's still insane. But, I will say, she did seem a little less…resentful about the fact that I'm dating her son afterwards."

"Well, I guess that's progress," Carly sighed.

"Which is all I can ask for," Freddie said, putting his arm around Sam.

"Oh, I almost forgot, someone owes me cupcakes," Sam smirked. "Because right now, the only thing in my stomach is zucchini and soy milk, which sort of tastes better than normal milk…"

"Then let's get you some cupcakes," Freddie chuckled.

"Let me just go grab my purse, I left it in the studio," Sam said.

"Okay," Freddie nodded as Sam raced up the steps. "And I'll call Gibby and tell him I can't make our movie night Friday."

"Why not?" Carly asked.

"Because my mom and girlfriend are both harassing me about it!" Freddie exclaimed. "I may be an avid _Galaxy Wars _fanatic, but I'm not suicidal!"


	362. Chapter 362

_Bundle_

Sam threw down her bag on her and Freddie's bed and began rummaging through it. She had to be quick, Freddie would be home in just a few minutes…

"Come on, come on," Sam mumbled. "Yes!"

She pulled out the thin, white box she had been looking for and hurriedly tore it open, pulling out the pregnancy test that had been housed inside.

"Alright," Sam said to herself, reading the instructions. "I just pee on this…easy enough, I guess."

She went into the bathroom, locking the door behind her. Once she had…_prepared _the test, she sat down on the edge of the bathtub and waited, knowing very well how long this five minutes was going to last.

She hadn't told anyone she thought she was pregnant yet. She had only begun to suspect it last week herself. She had woken up a few mornings feeling sick and groggy, she had been late, plus she felt…different.

Her and Freddie had been married almost three years, and both of them agreed that they wanted to be parents, but they hadn't officially begun trying yet. Sam knew Freddie would be excited, though. He was so good with Spencer's kids, after all.

Sam had never been good with children, yet the idea of her and Freddie's baby growing inside of her made her feel amazing. She placed a hand on her stomach, wondering what it would feel like to feel the gentle kick of her unborn child.

She was going to be a good mom; she was determined to make sure of that. She never exactly thought her mom was a horrible mother, but there was definitely much to be improved on. She wouldn't feed her baby black coffee just to get some funny videos or make him or her sit in tattoo parlors for hours as she inked up her entire back to look like Uncle Jessie from _Full House _because he was, apparently, the hottest guy around.

It was a given that Freddie would be a perfect dad. Even without having her own father to compare him to, she knew that her child was the luckiest kid in the world to get to have someone like him. She could just imagine Freddie holding a small bundle of blankets in his arm or teaching their child to read before he or she even turned three because he'd want their kid to be so advanced.

She wondered what it would be like. To hold her child for the first time, to teach them their first words, to help them take those first steps…

It was if Sam's brain had suddenly gone on overdrive, as thousands of that penetrated her mind. Would the baby be a boy or a girl? What would they name it? Would he or she look more like her or Freddie? Would the child be feisty like her? Or more calm like Freddie? Would he or she-

Just then the timer on Sam's Pearphone went off; five minutes were up. Still euphoric from all the images circling her mind, she looked down on the test, and then nearly dropped it.

It was negative. There was a tiny blue minus sign in the middle of the stick. She was not pregnant. Her and Freddie weren't going to have a baby.

Sam shook her head. It had never occurred to her that the test would be negative; she had bought the test more so to have proof to show Freddie than to confirm anything to herself. She had been so sure, and at that moment, Sam remembered why she had always been careful to never get her hopes up. About anything. Because it always wound up making her feel like this.

_How can I be upset_? Sam thought miserably by herself. _I can't be upset about what I never had. _

But her emotions didn't seem to want to listen to her as she felt her eyes growing wet with tears. She kept staring down at the test, cursing herself for jumping to conclusions. So she had been sick a few times this week; it was probably from the new ice cream flavor she had been eating, Caramel Beef Nut. So she was late, it wasn't the first time that had happened. And there were hundreds of reasons she could've been feeling different lately. Stress at work, the new pillows her and Freddie had gotten for their bed…

She wiped her eyes, still clutching the test. _Pull yourself together, you're still a Puckett, even if your last name's Benson now,_ she told herself firmly. She washed her face and then stepped out of the bathroom back into her and Freddie's adjoined bedroom. No sooner had she done so, though, did the bedroom door open and Freddie walked in.

"Hey," he said brightly. "Man, you would never believe the traffic over by Marshall Square, it was-" he stopped suddenly, catching sight of his wife's red eyes. "Sam? You-You okay?"

"Um, yeah," Sam nodded. "I just-"

Freddie looked down at Sam's hand, which she just realized was still holding the test.

"What's that?" he frowned.

"Nothing," Sam mumbled, making to toss it in the wastebasket, but Freddie gently took her hand. His eyes widened a bit when he saw what it was, but then looked back up at Sam, who seemed to be on the verge of tears again.

"Oh, baby," he said softly, pulling her into his arms, instantly understanding. "It's okay-"

"I know it's okay," Sam said shakily, burying her face in the crook of his neck. "It's not like we were trying or anything, but-but I was so _sure_, and I kept thinking about it, and I guess…I guess I started convincing myself that I was definitely pregnant, and I-I just started getting all excited about having a baby and getting to finally start a family, but then I took that test and it said that I _wasn't _pregnant, and it just felt like I had everything taken away from me, but I _didn't _because I-I never had it in the first place, and-and-"

Freddie cut her off by placing a kiss on her lips, tasting the saltiness of her tears as they rolled down her face.

"Sam," he said softly. "I-I didn't know you wanted a baby right now, this badly."

"I didn't think I was ready for one either," Sam mumbled. "I figured we'd wait a few more years. But then I thought that we'd be getting a baby soon for sure, and-and suddenly I just felt so ready. Raising a baby with you didn't seem so scary anymore, but I guess-I guess that's just not going to happen."

Freddie sat down on the edge of their bed, patting the space next to him for Sam.

"Baby," he said, lacing his fingers through hers. "I know how you must feel right now-"

"I know, I know, I need to stop moping" Sam sighed. "But I still-"

"You have every right to mope, Sam," Freddie told her. "Thinking that we were going to have a baby…that's huge news. That's _great_ news. Even though we never really sat down and said we were going to officially start trying, it still would've been the best news we've ever gotten, and then to have that snatched away from you, even if you only had your heart set on it for a few days…that's devastating."

"Yeah," Sam said heavily. "I just kept thinking about us being parents, how that would've been…"

"Well, Sam," Freddie said slowly. "I mean, just because you aren't pregnant now, doesn't mean it's never going to happen. We both know we want to be parents."

"I know," Sam said, giving him a small smile.

"And when you do get pregnant, and have our child, I know you're going to be a fantastic mother," Freddie told her. "Because you know what? You wouldn't be this upset right now if you didn't want a baby. You already have so much love ready to give it."

"You'd be such a good dad too," Sam whispered. "Any kid we have will be real lucky to have you as a father."

Freddie kissed her temple. "You know," Freddie said. "Maybe this is a sign that we're ready to really start trying."

"You serious?" Sam asked, her eyes shining.

"I've never been more serious about anything in my life," Freddie said. He brought his lips down to hers again. "I love you Sam, and I'm going to love our child, whenever we have one."


	363. Chapter 363

_Prison_

"That was way too long of a car trip," Carly moaned as her, Spencer, Sam and Freddie dragged their feet into stadium, where that years webicon was being held.

"Tell me about it," Sam nodded. "It was so boring."  
Carly glared at her.

"What?" Sam frowned.

"You can't complain about being bored when you entertained yourself with your boyfriend's lips the whole ride!" she snapped.

Sam and Freddie exchanged embarrassed looks.

"It wasn't the whole time," Freddie mumbled.

"Oh, look! There's the _Medieval Mayhem_ section!" Spencer said excitedly, adjusting the tip of his jousting spear.

"The what section?" Sam said.

"It's his new online obsession," Carly explained. "It's some dumb game where everyone tries to take over some kingdom from an ogre or something."

"Um, it happens to be the greatest MMORPG to hit the Internet since _War of Warlords_," Spencer defended. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go talk to some jesters."

"Where do we check in for iCarly?" Freddie asked as Spencer ran off.

"Um, over there, at that desk I think," Carly said, nodding over to a large countertop at the other end of the entrance. The three teens headed over, where a man was waiting for them.

"You guys are iCarly, right?" he asked.

"Yup, that's us," Carly smiled. "We're all set for our Q&A session."

"Great, I'm your liaison" the man smiled. "I'll just go grab your VIP passes and then I'll take you to your conference room."

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Sam asked as the man disappeared. "I mean, last time this just turned into one big fanwar."

"I know, but the people in charge here promised that weren't going to let in anybody who was involved in that last year," Carly assured her. "And they're also not letting anyone in with Seddie or Creddie t-shirts, posters, signs, or anything else. This time webicon is going to be strictly about iCarly for us."

"Good, because I promised my mom I wouldn't have any more cop trouble, and if any of those Creddie fans start with me about dating Freddie, they're going to be in for some of Mama's fist," Sam said.

"Aw," Freddie chuckled, putting his arm around her.

"I'm telling you, there's nothing to worry about this time," Carly said.

"Alright," their liaison said, coming back with three passes. "Let me get you guys to your conference room so you can set up. Oh, but make sure to stay close, though. There are some extreme iCarly fans we'll be passing."

"What?" Sam exclaimed.  
"Um, I'm sorry," Carly said. "But, I thought the webicon directors were going to make sure we just had a calm Q&A session this time, no crazy super fans."

"Yeah, we don't want to deal with another fan war," Freddie nodded.

"Relax," the liaison chuckled. "These fans aren't Seddiers or Creddiers. They just really, _really _like your web show."

"Oh," Carly said. "Well, that-that's fine then. Great, actually."

"So if you'll just follow me then," the liaison said.

The three teens complied as they followed the man out of the entrance into the heart of the stadium.

"Holy smokes, it's iCarly!" the suddenly head someone squeal, and they turned around to see a mass of people all screaming at the top of their lungs at the sight of them.

"Oh man," Sam said. "There's got to be like, four hundred people there!"

"Four hundred and eighty three," the liaison said. "But only fifty have tickets for the Q&A session."

"Well, that's good," Freddie said. "Because it'd be a little hard to try and answer everyone's question in this-Ah!"

Freddie had too busy speaking that he didn't notice how close he was getting to gated off section of fans, and was suddenly grabbed by group of screaming girls.

"Freddie we love you!"

"Freddie, will you marry me?"

"Freddie, you're the hottest guy on the Internet!"

"Oh my God! He got mobbed by girls again!" Carly exclaimed.

"Yeah, hopefully that lame shirt he's wearing will get ripped," Sam shrugged. "Hey, so where do you think they're hiding the Fat Shakes here?"

"Aren't you going to go save your boyfriend?" Carly asked.

"Why? That takes _effort_," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"So you don't care that he's literally being torn apart by a sea of hormonal girls who'd love nothing more than to be Mrs. Freddie Benson?" Carly frowned.

"They're all freaks," Sam said. "It's fine."

"Freddie, go out with me!"

"Freddie, I'd be your perfect girlfriend!"

"Freddie, we'd be so cute together!"

Sam's smug smile suddenly faltered.

"Is it still fine?" Carly asked knowingly.

"Nope!" Sam said, starting towards the crowd. She quickly spotted Freddie's plaid collar and his poor brown-haired head bobbing up and down.

"Move!" she bellowed, shoving her way into the crowd. She grabbed Freddie's shoulders and yanked him out of the mob, much to the displeasure of all the girls.

"It's like a prison riot in there!" Freddie gasped as Sam pulled him back over to Carly and their liaison. "I-I think one of them stole my wallet!"

"Good, you deserve it!" Sam frowned. "That's what you get for diving into pool of girls!"

"I didn't dive in, I was forced in!" Freddie defended. "You think I _enjoyed _being tampered with like a piece of meat?"

"Yeah, well, just don't get used to it," Sam mumbled.

"Aw, are you jealous baby?" Freddie chuckled cockily.

Suddenly a pink sock came soaring through the air and landed on Freddie's shoulder.

"Freddie! Breathe on my sock!" the girl who threw it yelled. "My feet need you!"

"Yeah, I'm real jealous of those spazes," Sam said.

"You know," Carly said thoughtfully. "This is the second crazy mob of girls that has attacked Freddie…Where's our mob of dudes?"

"Carls, every dude in here looks like he hasn't seen day light in ten years!" Sam scoffed. "You want to be mobbed by _them_?"

"Bro, come on! We're gonna miss the start of the jousting tournament at the _Medieval Mayhem _station!" a tall, muscular man said, rushing past the teens.

"I'm coming, I'm coming!" the man's equally attractive friend said, hurrying after him.

"You were saying?" Carly grinned.

"Freddie, I love you!" came another shriek from the sea of females, causing Sam's fists to clench.

Suddenly, one of the girls broke out of the gated off area and ran over to Freddie.

"Freddie!" she squealed, pushing an old water bottle under her nose. "Can you sign this? Please? _Please_?"

"Um, okay," Freddie nodded, clearly trying to hide his discomfort. "Wow, a water bottle…you know, I have some paper in my bag if you'd rather I sign that."

"Oh no, I spent an hour rooting through that garbage can out front after I watched you throw it out," the girl said at once. "I could never part with this."

"You were _watching him_?" Sam frowned.

"Okay, something tells me we'll be making a few phone calls to the cops later today," Carly whispered to her best friend.

"Not to rush you, but we need to get set up in the conference room," the liaison said as the girl rushed back into the crowd, holding up the water bottle triumphantly.

"Oh, right," Carly nodded. "Sorry.  
"I think I dislocated my shoulder in that swarm," Freddie mumbled, holding his hand out for Sam as they began to follow the liaison away from the chaos.

"Um, hey, actually, I-I'm gonna run to the bathroom," Sam said. "I'll meet up with you guys, in a few."

….

"Where _is _she?" Carly groaned, frustrated, as she paced anxiously behind the curtain that separated her and Freddie from the audience that was filling up the conference room.

"I don't know!" Freddie said. "I've called her, I texted her…I hope she didn't get lost."

"She's probably strung out on Fat Shakes," Carly mumbled. She poked her head out from behind the curtain to get a peek at their audience. "Oh man, the place is full. That means we have to start soon!"

"Maybe we can stall," Freddie said, looking out from the curtain as well. "And then one of us can go and try and find-hey. Do-Do you notice anything about the audience?"

"No," Carly frowned. "Why? They seem like a normal bunch of guys. Or well, normal for guys that camped out in front of the stadium for days to get into Webicon ahead of everyone else."

"Yeah, exactly, they're all _guys_," Freddie nodded. "There's not one girl in that audience."

"Whoa!" Carly exclaimed, seeing that this was true. "You're right! But…I don't understand. What happened to all those screaming girls that attacked you? They were at the head of the line to see us."

"I have no idea," Freddie said.

"Well, at least I kind of got my mob of boys now," Carly said. "But that doesn't help with the fact that Sam's gone AWOL! I swear, if she misses this, I'm going to-"

"Hey, Fat Shakes for everyone!" Sam said brightly, hurrying over to the two, handing them each a beverage.

"Where were you this whole time?" Freddie asked his girlfriend.

"I went to the bathroom and then got these," Sam said, sipping her shake.

"It took you over an hour to do that?" Carly asked suspiciously.

"There was a long line for the Fat Shakes; they're in demand!" Sam pointed out.

"You know, these are pretty good," Freddie said, tasting his Fat Shake. "Thanks, baby."

"No problem," Sam said sweetly, leaning up to give him a kiss.

"Okay you guys, are you ready to go on in five minutes?" the liaison asked, coming over to the teens.

"Now we are," Carly nodded.

"Great," he said. "Oh, and just so you know, you'll probably have a long wait trying to get out of here after you finish up."

"Why?" Freddie asked.

"Security's freaking out," the liaison sighed. "There was some big scene about a half-hour ago near here. Apparently there was suddenly this huge cloud of red smoke around where all those screaming girls were earlier, and when it cleared away, all of the girls' shoes were glued to the floor."

"What?" Carly exclaimed. "How did that happen?"

"Who knows," he shrugged. "But the fire department's on their way over to help them get unstuck, but in the meantime, they lost their seats in here. It says in the fine print on their Webicon tickets that in the event that one's shoes get stuck to the floor inexplicably, they are still not exempt from our 'no refund' policy."

"Oh, how…smart," Freddie said.

"I'll go get ready to announce you guys," the liaison said, heading out on stage.

Carly and Freddie turned towards Sam.

"Sucks about their shoes, huh?" Sam said innocently, finishing the last of her Fat Shake. "But hey, maybe since they can't really move for the next two-to-six hours, they'll have time to think twice about mobbing people's boyfriends." She looked at her empty cup. "I'll go throw this away."

"So," Carly sighed, crossing her arms as Sam headed over to the trashcan. "Do we _want _to know?"

"I have a feeling we don't," Freddie grinned.

"Why are you all perky?" Carly frowned.

"Because I was right," he said triumphantly. "She was jealous."

"You're such a boy," Carly said, rolling her eyes.


	364. Chapter 364

**AN-So this is a chapter to 346, when Freddie realizes that it was because Sam saw him kiss Carly in iGoodbye that she left Seattle. Now, in chapters like this, I know I usually wind up making Seddie get back together or have Freddie rush to L.A. to find Sam, but I decided to try and make this one a little different in that aspect, and I hope you enjoy it!**

…

_Horn_

Sam sat at a small table at the truck stop she was currently at. She had been driving her motorcycle for nearly five hours and she was exhausted. Hopefully the coffee and burger she had ordered would perk her up. If not, she supposed that she would have to try and find a cheap motel to stay at for the night.

She pulled out her phone and looked up a map. It seemed that she was on route to L.A…that seemed like a good place for her to start her seemingly endless journey. She'd spend some time there, maybe see some celebrities, and then head off to wherever the wind took her next.

Her phone buzzed, and she saw she had gotten yet another text message from Freddie. She quickly canceled out of it. She wasn't ready to talk to him. She didn't know if she ever would be. She wondered why he was calling her. Had he realized that she had left? Or was he still under the impression that he would see her in school tomorrow?

Her phone buzzed again. And again. And then it rang, his name and picture flashing across her phone screen.

Sam moaned, as she pressed the ignore button, realizing that each time it was getting harder and harder to resist the temptation of responding to him. As much as she wanted to get away from him, a part of her wanted nothing more than to hear his voice.

_Pathetic_, Sam thought to herself, taking a bite of a French fry. _I don't need that nub in my life. I don't need to sit there and listen to him whine about how his precious, lovely Carly left him. _

But then a face chat request popped up on her screen, and Sam's fingered hovered above the ignore button. This would be the ultimate test of her will. If she could turn away the chance to actually see Freddie face-to-face, or rather, screen-to-screen, then she was truly done with him. She would be able to officially block him out of her life. Yet, it seemed that even though she was only looking at them through a picture, his big, brown eyes could still manage to break her, and she found herself slowly hitting the accept button.

Freddie's face popped up on the screen. He looked frantic and worried.

"Sam!" he exclaimed, sounding shocked that she had actually answered him. "Sam, where are you?"

"I don't know," Sam said honestly. "But wherever it is, it sure has good burgers."

"You left," he said. He wasn't accusing her. He was simply stating a fact.

"Yeah," Sam nodded slowly. "I-I did. I, um, I didn't think you'd notice so soon."

"I went to your house a few hours ago," he mumbled. "And-And saw that you weren't there. And then I remembered you had that bike, and-and I put two and two together."

"Oh," Sam sighed.

"Sam, you need to come back," Freddie said firmly. "You can't just leave Seattle."

"Why not? Carly left the country in just a few hours," she pointed out.

"That was different, she was with her dad," Freddie said. "You-You're all alone."

"I like it that way," she shrugged, trying hard to keep up her brave front and not let him know how much that realization hurt. She _was _alone now, wasn't she?

"You can't do this," he said weakly. "You need to come back home."

"Why?" Sam demanded. "Why do I need to come back home? So I can go to school? Carly's not there to force me to, anymore. To do iCarly? Nope, that's over too. To see my best friend? Well she's gone too."

"What-What about me?" Freddie asked softly.

Sam looked down at her lap. "What about you?"

"Wasn't I worth staying for? Aren't _I _your friend?"

Sam didn't answer.

"Sam?"

"Look, Carly's starting a new chapter in her life," Sam said heavily. "I can too. And so can you. Now that you don't have to do all that work for iCarly, why don't you start working on that software programing you've been talking about doing for months? Maybe you can be one of those genius kids who becomes a millionaire because you created some new virus tracking thing or something."

"There's a difference between starting a new chapter in your life and just running away from your life!" Freddie told her.

"I didn't run away!" Sam retorted.

"Yes you did!" Freddie exclaimed, anger abruptly flooding his voice. "You couldn't stand that your life got uprooted and that things weren't going to be the same as they always were, so you ran. You didn't want to stay and face things; you took the easy way out!"

"Well so what?" Sam said harshly. "Why would you care anyway?"

Freddie looked taken aback, and then his expression softened. "Sam…you know about this kiss, don't you?"

_How could he have known? _Sam thought. _Did he see me standing outside the studio?_

"Sam?" Freddie said again.

"I-Yeah," Sam slowly admitted. "I-I saw her kiss you…congratulations."

"Congratulations?"

"You finally got her, the girl of your dreams," she said, giving him a small smile.

"That kiss meant nothing," Freddie said firmly. "Nothing. And she's not the girl of my dreams."

"You kissed her back, though," Sam said.

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean that I'm in love with Carly again or anything."

"I don't care if-"

"Is that why you left?" Freddie asked softly.

_What is he a mind reader or something? _Sam thought.

"Not-Not completely," she said honestly. _Heck, _she thought_. What do I have to lose? I'm a good three hundred miles away from him. _

"So it was _part _of the reason then?" he said, looking just a tiny bit guilty.

"Look," Sam said. "If Carly hadn't gone to Italy, and I had seen the kiss, I wouldn't have left. If Carly had gone to Italy, but I hadn't seen the kiss, I wouldn't have left either. It was both of those things. Together."

"But, do-do you really think leaving Seattle for who knows where is going to help you deal with them?" Freddie asked.

"Maybe," Sam shrugged. "But, you know, I've always wanted to take a motorcycle trip…now's my chance."

Freddie sighed. "Well do you have a helmet?"

"Huh?" Sam frowned.

"A helmet," Freddie repeated. "You're at least wearing one, right?"

Sam couldn't help but laugh. Even now, Freddie Benson would always be safety freak. His mom had done a good job of ensuring that.

"Yes," she said, rolling her eyes. "I'm wearing a helmet. Don't you see my helmet hair?"

"Your hair looks perfect," Freddie said, and Sam hoped that he couldn't tell that he was blushing through the phone screen.

"Where are you even heading?" Freddie asked Sam heavily.

"California…probably L.A," Sam said. "At least that's the route I'm on. After that, I'm not sure."

"What are you going to do there?"

"I dunno, have some fun," Sam said.

Freddie nodded, and then took a deep breath. "Sam…I need to ask you something."

"What?"

"Why-Why were you so upset about seeing the kiss?" he asked. "Was-Was it because…you know…you-you still have feelings? For me?"

_No_, Sam thought to herself firmly. _He's not getting that out of me. _Freddie had already caused enough damage by even making her admit that she had seen the kiss in the first place. And three hundred miles away or not, there was no way that he was tearing down any more of her walls.

_But he said that kiss with Carly didn't mean anything, _she told herself. _And if he isn't into Carly still, maybe…_

_Maybe nothing, _the stronger, more rational voice inside her said. _Just because he doesn't love Carly, doesn't mean he loves you. Besides, you know it's going to hurt just as much the next time you see him kiss another girl. Save yourself the aggravation, Puckett. _

"I-I have to go," Sam said quickly. "Some dude out in the parking lot is blaring his horn for me to move my motorcycle. I've been parked in a ten minute spot for almost half and hour."

"Wait," Freddie said. He knew that she wasn't going to answer the question if he asked again, and it would probably just wind up pushing her away even more, so he conceded. "Just…stay safe, okay? You know you can call me. Anytime."

Sam grinned. "Thanks."

"Will you at least text me or something when you get to L.A?" he asked. "So I know you got there?"

"We'll see," Sam said. She tried to take in everything about him. From his eyes to the freckle right above his left ear. Because who knew when she would get to see his face again. If she was going to start new, she at least wanted to have his face imprinted in her memory.

Freddie opened his mouth, struggling under the weight of everything he wanted to say. "Bye," he said."

"See you," Sam said.

Their eyes locked for one more second and then Sam quickly hit the end call button. She stuffed the rest of the burger in her mouth, took one last swig of coffee and then hurried out back to her bike.

She supposed she should've felt a sense of closure; talking to Freddie and admitting why she left. But she didn't. She just felt empty, and hoped that whatever she found in L.A. would fill that void.

Meanwhile, three hundred miles away, back in Seattle, Freddie slowly dropped his phone down on his lap. "Sam," he sighed. "Sam…"

…

**AN-So if you haven't seen the newest Sam&Cat yet…don't read this. Anyway, I am kind of pissed that apparently we aren't getting big scene where Freddie rushed to L.A. to try and bring Sam back to him like I've been hoping for since the show started because he knows she's there and talks to her there! I mean, yeah, I'm glad there was finally SOME mention of Freddie on the show, but still. I'm still holding out for a Nathen Kress cameo or something, though. **


	365. Chapter 365

_Executive_

"Baby, are you sure you're going to be alright?" Sam asked as she zipped up her suitcase. "I mean, I can always stay home and-"

"What? No! That's insane," Freddie said. "Sam, you _deserve _this girls weekend with Carly."

"But you've never been alone with the kids for an entire weekend," Sam pointed out.

"They're my own kids, I think I'll be fine," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "It's not like I'm watching a pack of wild wolves or something."  
"I know, but they're a lot to handle," Sam said. "Jason's got his robotics club tournament tomorrow, Ashton's got her Sunshine Scouts meeting, Emma has that soccer game and Tyler's got a play date with that weird kid who looks like chipmunk-"

"I've got it," Freddie said, picking up her suitcase. "I can handle all that. You just worry about relaxing, okay?

"But what if something happens and I'm not-"

"Nothing's going to happen," Freddie promised her.

"But what if-"

"Sam, as your husband, I'm making the executive decision for you to go to this spa resort with Carly and have the best weekend of your life," Freddie said firmly.

Sam gave him a small smile. "Since when do you get to make executive decisions around here?"

"Since you decided to refuse to have a good time without your children," Freddie said, placing a quick kiss on her lips. "Now come on, your plane leaves soon, and you need to meet Carly still."

"Well…okay," Sam nodded as her and Freddie started out of their bedroom downstairs. "But you call me if you can't handle them."

"I will, but that won't happen," Freddie assured her.

"And make sure that they all go to bed at decent hours," Sam said.

"Got it."

"And make sure they clean their plates at dinner. And don't forget to-"

"Believe it or not, Sam, I have had experience with these guys," Freddie said as they reached the living room, where the four Benson children were sitting, watching T.V. He grabbed the remote and turned the television off.

"Hey!" nine-year old Emma exclaimed.

"Come say goodbye to mom," Freddie said. "She's leaving her spa weekend."

"You guys make sure you behave, okay?" Sam said, kissing the top of Jason's head and giving the twins a hug. "Because if I find out you didn't, you'll be dealing with me, not daddy, kapeesh?"

"I'll miss you, mommy," five-year old Tyler said sweetly.

"Aw, I'll miss you too," Sam smiled, scooping him up in her arms.

"Alright, now get out of here," Freddie said, giving her one last long kiss. "Go on, have fun! We'll be perfectly fine right here, won't we guys?"

His four children were silent.

"Thanks for the support," he mumbled.

"Just don't destroy my kids," Sam sighed.

"_Our _kids," Freddie corrected.

"Maybe," Sam grinned, giving him another quick kiss.

"Ha, ha," Freddie said dryly.

"Alright, bye guys," Sam said, picking up her suitcase.

"Bye mom," the kids called after her as she went out the front door.

"So!" Freddie said, clapping his hands together. "The weekend is ours! What sort of adventures should we have, huh? What sort of ruckus should we stir up?"

"Ruckus?" Jason scoffed.

"Um, we-we sort of just want to watch T.V.," Ashton said.

"T.V.?" Freddie repeated. "So no crazy, wacky shenanigans? Come on, you guys, good old dad is in charge! This is the opportunity of a lifetime!"

"Can you take us skydiving?" Emma asked hopefully.

"Um, well…no," Freddie said slowly. "But hey, I happen to have a pretty trilling DVD _about _skydiving we could watch."

"We're good," Jason said quickly, turning the television back on.

"Fine," Freddie conceded. "Have your stupid T.V."

…

"Dinner is served," Freddie said, sliding a plate of spaghetti tacos onto the table. "See, I bet you thought only your Uncle Spencer could come up with these, but I happen to be quite the master chef when it comes to preparing amusing meals."

"It's just spaghetti in a taco shell," Emma pointed out as her, Ashton and Jason gathered around the table.

"No sass at the dinner table," Freddie said. "And where's Tyler?"

"In his room I think," Jason said. "Dad? Can I stay up late and watch MMA fights?"

"No, because I have to drive you to your robotics club tournament at six in the morning," Freddie said.

"You said you were going to be fun," Jason mumbled.

"I am fun! I'm the coolest dad there is!" Freddie defended. "How about…How about you stay up for _two _fights, and then you go to bed?"

"Okay," Jason agreed. "Thanks dad!"

"Daddy? Can I try on mommy's make-up?" Ashton asked. "You'd be really fun then!"

"Um…I'm gonna go get Tyler," Freddie said quickly. "You guys eat up."

Freddie hurried upstairs to his youngest son's room.

"Ty?" he said, opening the door. "Dinner time. Come on, I made spaghetti tacos, your favorite!"

He looked over at his son's racecar bed where he was laying.

"Daddy," the five-year old moaned. "I don't feel good."

"You don't?" Freddie frowned, sitting down on the edge of the bed. "What's wrong?"

"My tummy hurts," he mumbled.

Freddie felt his forehead. "Oh man, I think you have a fever too. Alright, let's get some medicine in you." He picked his son up, but then caught sight of his slightly green face, and quickly grabbed a bucket and handed it to him. "Here, just in case…"

He went back stairs to the kitchen and set Tyler down on the counter while he rummaged through the cabinet where they kept the medicine.

"Daddy? Why's Tyler green?" Emma asked.

"He's got a little stomach flu, sweetie," Freddie explained, pulling down a bottle of pink medication. "Alright, Tyler, hopefully after a spoonful of this, you'll be back to-"

Just then Tyler gave a mighty grunt and vomited all over the kitchen floor.

"Ew!" the other three kids exclaimed.

"That was what the bucket was for," Freddie said under his breath.

"Daddy?" Tyler said weakly. "I threw up."

"Yes, yes I can see that, thank you," Freddie said, trying not be too grossed out at the moment. "Okay, Jason, girls, go finish eating your dinner in the living room. Tyler, come here, I'll get you cleaned up…"

He picked his son up again, holding him at arms length to avoid getting any _residue _on himself. Sam always dealt with the kids when they were sick like this because to be perfectly honest, he was no good with vomit. He was already starting to feel sick himself just at the scent of it.

_This is going to be a long weekend,_ Freddie thought to himself as he carried Tyler into the bathroom. _Thank God it's just Tyler that's sick though…One puking kid I can handle. _

…

"Jason?" Freddie yawned early the next morning, poking his head into the thirteen-year old boy's bedroom. He was completely exhausted from staying up all night with Tyler. "Jason, wake up. You have your robotics tournament to get to."

"Ugh," Jason moaned, stirring slightly in his bed. "Oh….Dad? Dad, I feel sick."

_Oh no. No!_ Freddie thought desperately as he hurried over and placed his hand on Jason's forehead, realizing it was just as hot as Tyler's was last night.

"Am I dying? I think I am," Jason mumbled groggily.

"You're not dying," Freddie sighed. "You must've caught what Tyler had last night."

"Stupid Tyler," Jason groaned.

"Well, I guess you're going to miss your robotics tournament," Freddie said. "There's no way you can go now."

"But I want to go," Jason whined.

"Sorry, Jason, you're staying in bed," Freddie said. "I'll go get some medicine and soup for you."

_Great, now that's two sick_, Freddie thought miserably as he left Jason's room. _That's half my kids!_

Part of him was of course less than pleased about this because it meant he'd be run ragged taking care of his two sons on his own, but the other part of him was upset because this meant that his plans of spending some quality time with the four children were ruined. He had actually been looking forward to this weekend to finally try and show his kids that he could be more than just their dorky dad. Oh well…maybe he could at least spend a little time with the girls at some point.

But just as he passed the twins room door, he heard a loud moan from inside.

Somewhat reluctantly, he pushed open their door, seeing them both sitting in their beds, Ashton with her head stuck in her wastebasket and Emma clutching her stomach.

"Well isn't this typical," Freddie sighed.

…

"Daddy! My head hurts!" Emma moaned as Freddie brought in two trays of soups for his daughters.

"And I feel tired," Ashton yawned.

"You need rest then, Ash," Freddie said. "And Emma, I just gave you some medicine for your head. You're going to have to wait a few more hours until I give you more."

"But I want more now," Emma said.

"I know you do, sweetie, but you can't," Freddie sighed. "Just try and get some sleep like your sister, and maybe you'll feel better."

"I can't sleep, she snores," Emma told him.

"No I don't!" Ashton pouted. "Daddy! Tell her I don't!"

"You do!" Emma said.

"Hey! The more you guys fight, the sicker you're going to feel!" Freddie said firmly. "Now both of you get some sleep. I don't care if somebody's snoring or not!"

And with that Freddie left the room, still hearing the bickering as he closed the door.

"Oh man," Freddie sighed, massaging his temples. "They're the ones sick and I'm the one suffering."

"Dad?" he heard a weak voice from Jason's room.

Freddie let out another sigh before turning and heading into the room. "Yeah buddy?"

"Dad, I see the light," Jason said from his bed.

Freddie resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "Jason," he said. "You have a stomach virus, not the measles. You're going to be fine after a few days of bed rest and medicine."

"Could-Could I have some juice?" Jason asked softly, ignoring his father's comment.

"Sure," Freddie said, about to leave the room.

"With a bendy straw?"

"Fine, I'll put a bendy straw in it," Freddie said.

He walked down the hall to Tyler's room and opened the door. "Hey," he said, poking his head in. "Do you want any-Tyler!"

"What?" Tyler asked, looking up from his toy racecars that he was racing around his room.

"Why aren't you in bed?"

"Because I'm bored," Tyler said.

"But you need to take it easy, especially since you were up half the night throwing up your stomach," Freddie said. He picked up the five-year old and placed him back in bed, tucking him in. "There. Now you stay there and relax. I'm going to get your brother some juice. Do you want any? Or would rather have some more soup or-"

Suddenly he spotted a wrapper underneath his son's pillow, and picked it up.

"A candy bar wrapper?" Freddie exclaimed. "Tyler!"

"I was hungry," Tyler said, slowly clutching his stomach.

"Candy is the worst thing for you to be eating right now," Freddie said. "Right now you need plain, bland foods that won't upset your stomach anymore. Now when did you eat this?"

"Five minutes ago," Tyler groaned. "Daddy? I think I'm going to-"

"Bucket!" Freddie said quickly, snatching up the bucket that was sitting on his nightstand and shoving it at his son. "In the bucket this time, _please_!"

….

"Mama's home!" Sam announced loudly, bursting through the front door, dropping her suitcase and holding out her arms. Then she frowned and looked over at her husband, who was slouched down on the couch. "Hey! Where's my stampede of children tackling me to the ground telling me how much they missed me?"

"Drugged and in their beds upstairs," Freddie mumbled.

"What?"

"You planned this, didn't you?" Freddie said, narrowing his eyes.

"Planned what?" Sam asked, walking over to him and sitting down next to him.

"You did something to make sure that they all got sick this weekend when I was in charge, didn't you?"

"They're sick?" Sam frowned. "What? Why didn't you call me?"

"Because I'm stubborn, okay?" Freddie snapped.

"Aw, I'm sorry baby," Sam said, giving him a quick kiss. "But how are they? What did they have?"

"Stomach viruses," Freddie mumbled. "Tyler got it first, and then he gave it to everyone else. And they're fine, just tired now; I think they got the puking part out of their systems last night. But do you realize how _terrible _our kids are when they're sick? The twins fight fifty times more than usual because they're stuck in the same room all day, Tyler seems to think that being sick is the perfect time to run around and stuff his face with candy, and Jason's probably upstairs right now writing his will."

"Didn't you do that the last time you were sick?" Sam pointed out.  
"I had pneumonia!"

"You had a _cold_," Sam smirked.

"And that attitude's exactly the reason why I left my limited edition 1964 Trudgemaster model to Gibby and not you," Freddie said, getting to his feet.

"Where are you going?" Sam asked.

"Well, see, after dealing with four sick kids all weekend, it was sort of inevitable that I get sick too," Freddie said. "So I'm going to collapse into bed and try not pass out."

"Wait, _you're _sick now?" Sam frowned.

"Oh yeah," Freddie said. "So, baby, do you think you could bring me up some soup in a little bit? Oh, and can you get me the thick winter blanket? I have the chills."

Sam rolled her eyes as she watched her husband climb upstairs. "I should've never left that spa," she mumbled.


	366. Chapter 366

_Snake_

"Oh come on, it's not going to be that bad," Carly said as her and her fourteen-year old daughter, Clarissa, walked into the Benson's house.

"It's an overnight camping trip in the woods," Clarissa pointed out. "It's going to be _terrible_."

"Tell me about it," Ashton said, walking into the kitchen. "Mom? Do we really have to go?"

"Yup," Sam said, stuffing two brown bags with sandwiches.

"But it's the woods!" Ashton moaned.

"You've been listening to whining all morning too?" Carly said to Sam, rolling her eyes.

"Hey, I've got two kids complaining," Sam said.

"I'm not complaining," Emma said, joining the others. "I'm actually sort of excited to-"

"Emma! Will you take the stink bombs out of your pocket?" Sam exclaimed. "For the millionth time, you can't bring them! You've already got two strikes against you this semester, and one more stunt will get you suspended!"

"Oh come on, I won't get caught!" Emma groaned, emptying her pockets. "What else am I supposed to do on a lame camping trip? Look at nature?"

"Ah, so we're still on the whole 'I hate camping' rant?" Freddie asked, coming into the kitchen, ten-year old Tyler at his heels.

"You guys, you should be thrilled," Carly said. "This will be one of the best trips of your high school experience! Think of all the memories you'll form, and all the interesting things you'll learn!"

"You hate camping more than these three combined," Sam commented, amused.

"Yeah, they asked her to chaperone at the PTA meeting, and she said her cat was getting surgery," Clarissa mumbled.

"You don't have a cat," Freddie said.

"Yes, but the PTA ladies don't know that!" Carly hissed.

"I want to go camping," Tyler said. "It sounds cool!"

"Well, in a few years you'll be in high school, going on this same trip," Sam told him.

"But I want to go now!" Tyler pouted.

"Hey, I know, that could be our family vacation this year!" Freddie grinned. "Yeah…a Benson family camp out! We could rent an RV and go deep into the woods and-"

"No!" Sam, Emma, and Ashton said loudly.

…

"This is the life," Sam smiled happily that evening as her and Freddie clinked their wine glasses together, his arm wrapped around her.

"We've got the whole house to ourselves," Freddie said, kissing the top of his wife's head. "One kid's at college, two are on a school trip, and one's at a sleepover…do you realize how _rare _this is?"

"I know," Sam nodded.

"We can do anything we want tonight," Freddie continued. "We can go out dancing, we can chill out in the hot tub, we can just stay here by the fire and talk without being interrupted."

"Yeah," Sam said thoughtfully. "Or…we can actually go to bed early and get a whole twelve hours sleep before we need to pick the kids back up?"

"I'm liking that idea," Freddie chuckled.

"But," Sam said as the couple got to their feet. "I'm not _that _tired. You think you still have some energy in you for a certain _activity_."

"Baby, I will _never _be too tired for that," Freddie said, giving her a deep kiss, and then surprising her by scooping her up bridal style to carry her upstairs.

…..

A few hours later, Sam and Freddie were both fast asleep in their bed. Suddenly, Sam's phone on her nightstand began to ring, waking them from their slumber.

"Ugh," Sam moaned, slowly opening her eyes as Freddie groggily turned on the lamp on his bedside table. "What?"

She grabbed her phone, seeing a number that she didn't recognize.

"Alright, these stupid telemarketers are in for it this time," she snapped. "Waking me up at two in the morning…Hello?"

"Hello," a voice on the other end said. "Is this Mrs. Benson?"

"Yeah," Sam mumbled, struggling to keep her eyes open. "Who's this?"

"I'm Mrs. Cox, one of the teachers who chaperoned the Ridgeway High School's camping trip," the woman said.

_What did Emma do now?_ Sam thought.

"I'm calling about your daughter," Mrs. Cox continued. "I'm-"

"Look, I'm sorry for whatever Emma did," Sam said, holding back a yawn. "But can't it wait-"

"No, I'm calling about your other daughter, Ashton," Mrs. Cox interrupted.

"Ashton?" Sam repeated. Ashton never got in trouble.

"I'm very sorry, but she's just been rushed to the hospital," Mrs. Cox told her.

"What?" Sam exclaimed, suddenly wide-awake. Freddie, who had been slowly falling back to sleep on her other side jerked back up at his wife's voice.

"What?" Freddie frowned.

"What happened?" Sam asked anxiously. "Is she okay? What did she-?"

"According to her sister, she woke up a few minutes ago to use the restroom," the teacher explained. "And when she was walking out of her cabin, she was bitten by a snake."

"But-But was it poisonous?" Sam asked. "Is she going to be okay?"

"We don't know, but the ambulance should be arriving at the Seattle Medical Center in a few moments," the teacher replied. "Her sister and another chaperone rode along with her."

"Okay, we'll be right there," Sam said, already getting out bed.  
"Sam, what's going on?" Freddie asked, confused.

"Ashton's in the hospital," Sam said quickly, pulling a pair of shoes.

"The hospital?" Freddie cried, jumping out of bed. "Why?"

"She got bit by a snake."

"Well was it poisonous?"

"Poisonous enough for her to be rushed to the hospital!" Sam snapped. "Now come on, will you?"

"I'm ready," Freddie said, sliding on his sneakers and grabbing his car keys from the dresser.

….

"Emma," Freddie said as him and Sam rushed into the hospital, spotting their other daughter sitting in the waiting area. "Emma, how is she?"

"I don't know," Emma said shakily as Freddie pulled her into a hug, seeing how scared she looked. "I woke up because I heard her get out of bed and she said she was going outside to the cabin with the bathrooms, and when she opened the door she screamed and said that something bit her."

"But did she seem…bad?" Sam asked. "Was she just afraid because the snake bit her and it hurt? Or did it seem worse?"

"Her-Her ankle got really swollen really quickly," Emma told her. "And then she said…she said she was having trouble breathing, and in the ambulance ride, they-they had to hook her up to something."

"Aw jeez," Sam mumbled, sinking into one of the chairs.

"Where-Where's the teacher that came here with you?" Freddie asked.

"She's talking to a doctor over there," Emma said, nodding over to a woman at the front desk.

Sam and Freddie hurried over to her.

"Excuse me," Freddie said as the woman turned around. "We're Ashton's parents."

"Oh good," the woman said, relieved.

"Are you her doctor?" Sam asked the man in the white coat who she had been talking to.

"Yes, one of them," the man nodded, holding out his hand for her. "I'm Dr. Borris."

"I'll leave you two to talk," the teacher said.

"So she got bit by a snake," Freddie said. "But how bad is it? Is her leg just-just going to be sore for a little bit?"

"No, I'm afraid not," the doctor said heavily. "The snake was poisonous."

"But-But there weren't supposed to be any poisonous wildlife in that part of the woods," Sam frowned. "That's what the permission slip we signed said-"

"The snake most likely wasn't native to those parts," the doctor explained. "What we see a lot of times is people buying these exotic snakes illegally and the releasing them into the wild, far from their natural habitats, once they get too hard to handle."

"Well, is she going to be all right?" Freddie asked. "I mean, she-she got here in time, didn't she?"

"She got here in time for us to be able to administer an antidote, yes," the doctor nodded.

"So then she'll be fine," Sam said slowly. "Right?"

"I-I can't give you a definite answer on that," the doctor said. "Not for at least another few hours. This variety of poison is tricky. The antidote should help her, but I can't tell you if it's completely counteracting the poison until-"

"Well then give her something else!" Sam yelled.

"Anything else would just aggravate her condition," the doctor explained calmly. "Right now her body's doing its best to beat out the poison. Her body temperature has sky rocketed and she's drifting in and out of consciousness."

"Where is she?" Freddie asked weakly. "You have to at least let us see her."

"She's up in room 305," he told him. "I can take you up there, or you can-"

"Emma!" Sam called over her shoulder, already heading towards the stairs. "Em, let's go!"

The family reached the third floor of the hospital and spotted 305 near a nurse's station. Sam quickly burst through the door, followed by Freddie and Emma.

"Oh, my poor baby," Sam said, seeing her daughter laying on the hospital bed. She was sleeping, and there was an IV bag with a yellowish liquid connected on one of the veins on her arm. Sam could see a heavy bandage around her right ankle that was sticking out from under her covers.

"She's burning up," Freddie commented, kissing her forehead. As her father kissed her, Ashton began to stir slightly.

"Mmm," she mumbled.

"Sweetie, are you awake?" Sam whispered, sitting down on the chair by her bed.

"Where-" Ashton said softly, still not opening her eyes.

"Where's what, baby?" Freddie asked, confused.

"What's she saying?" Sam asked her husband.

"I don't know, maybe-"

"She wants to know where she is," Emma said, still standing by the door, looking at her twin from across the room. She slowly walked over and sat down next to her mother. "You're in the hospital, Ash."

"Why am I-" Ashton began, but then after another second, she was out again.

Emma looked up at Sam. "Did the doctor say she was going to be okay?"

"Um, he said-he said he's not sure right now," Sam said gently, gripping Ashton's hand.

"Oh," Emma whispered, looking down at her lap, and Sam could see that she had tears in her eyes.  
Freddie walked over and put an arm around her. Both him and Sam knew that despite the girls' constant bickering and fighting, that they really did love each other. They were best friends. If anything happened to Ashton…Emma would be lost.

The family sat in the room for nearly two hours, watching Ashton, who kept muttering occasional phrases before passing out again.

"Alright," Dr. Borris said, walking into the room, followed by two nurses. "I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to ask you all to leave. I need to see if the antidote has made any progress."

"Well how long's that going to take?" Freddie asked.

"At least an hour," the doctor replied. "You can wait down in the waiting area. I'll come down with you with news as soon as I have it."

Reluctantly, the family left Ashton and retreated back to the waiting area, where they sat silently. The silence was broken, though, by Sam's phone ringing.

"It's Carly," she said, looking down at the screen. "Why's she calling at four in the morning?"

"Clarissa probably called her and told her about Ashton," Freddie pointed out.

"Oh…right," Sam nodded, picking up her phone. "Hello?"

"Finally!" Carly exclaimed on the other end. "I've been trying to get you for two hours almost!"

"I must not have had signal," she mumbled.

"How's Ashton?" Carly asked. "Clarissa called me…She said she got bit by a snake and had to be rushed off to the hospital?"

"Yeah," Sam sighed. "It was-It was poisonous."

"Oh my God!" Carly gasped.

"They gave her this antidote thing, but the doctor said they don't know if it's working against the poison yet or not, and she seems really out of it…She has a fever and can't even stay awake for more than a few seconds…"

"Do-Do you want me to-"

"No," Sam said at once. "Um, Carls, thanks and everything, but this is a-"

"Family thing," Carly finished for her. "I understand. But I'm still here for you, if you need anything."

And then the family went back to stone silence for close to another two hours before Dr. Borris appeared again.

Sam and Freddie jumped to their feet.

"I have good news," the doctor said before either of them could open their mouths. "The antidote is working against the poison."

"Thank God," Freddie said, sighing in relief.

"It's almost out of her system, because it was administered in time," the doctor said. "But she's still going to have to let her body recover for at least a week."

"But she'll be alright?" Sam asked, desperate for his confirmation.

"Yes," the doctor nodded. "She's going to be alright. She's going to have to stay here for a few more days, but she'll make a full recovery. She's starting to stay lucid longer, so you'll be able to talk to her. You can go back up to see her if you want."

"Thank you," Freddie said earnestly.

The family rushed back up to room 305, where to their relief, they saw Ashton had her eyes open.

"Mom? Dad?" she mumbled. "What happened?"

"You don't remember?" Freddie asked as Sam hugged her.

"Not really," she said.

"You got bit by a snake, genius," Emma said.

"I got bit by a snake?" Ashton exclaimed.

"Easy, Ashton," Sam said.

"I hate snakes," Ashton moaned groggily. "They're gross."

"Yeah, well, can't really blame you any more," Sam said, stroking her daughter's hair and giving her a small smile.

"Hey, Emma?" Ashton frowned, lifting her head up off of her pillow. "Why are your eyes red?"

"They're not!" Emma said quickly.  
"Were your crying?"

"No!"

"You were, weren't you?"

"Mom, make her stop!" Emma cried.

"You were crying for me!"

"I'll make _you _cry!"

"Admit it, you love me," Ashton said, giving her sister a weak smile.

"So… I think she's feeling better now, right?" Freddie said, smiling down at Sam.


	367. Chapter 367

_Spine_

"Sam?" Carly frowned, looking up from her textbook she was reading at her desk at her blonde roommate, who was loudly popping her gum as she listened to her Pearpod. "Sam!"

But of course Sam couldn't hear her over the music blaring into her ears, so with a groan of frustration, Carly got up and headed over to her best friend and yanked her headphones out.

"Hey!" Sam exclaimed indignantly. "What'd you do that for?"

"Because I'm trying to study, but all I hear is your music and gum popping!" Carly said.

"You've been studying all night, take a break," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"No, the exam's tomorrow and I still have one more chapter to go over!" Carly snapped. "And in case you've forgotten…you're in this class too!"

"So I'll wing it," Sam shrugged.

"Sam, this is college now," Carly sighed. "You can't just wing it anymore, you need to study! Come on, we can pull an all-nighter together. It will be fun! We can order pizza and get some espresso shots."

"Fine," Sam mumbled.

"-And we can pop popcorn and order those special cookies from that bakery that delivers, and-wait. Did you just agree to study?" Carly frowned. "I haven't even got to the meat part of my bribe!"

"Let's just do this, okay," Sam said, grabbing her textbook from under her bed.

Carly gave her a strange look. "Okay, Puckett," she said, crossing her arms. "What's wrong?"

"What makes you think something's wrong?"

"Because it always takes me at _least _a good ten minutes to persuade you to do anything school-related," Carly said. "You never cave on my first try."

"Well…this exam's important, like you said," Sam shrugged.

"Who are you and what did you do with Sam?" Carly asked.

"Carls, jeesh, why is it such a shock that I'm studying?" Sam asked, a bit annoyed.

"It's just I've never seen you this…willing," Carly said.

"Well now I am!" Sam said.

"Okay," Carly conceded. "That's great then. I'm proud of you. But if you need to talk about-"

"I miss Freddie, okay?" Sam blurted out. "There. Happy?"

"Well Sam, of course you miss Freddie," Carly chuckled. "He's your boyfriend, and he's a million miles away at MIT."

"But I miss him a _lot_," Sam moaned. "I mean, I know I miss him all the time, but it's like lately he's all I can think about."

"Have you talked to him lately?"

"Not since the beginning of the week," Sam replied. "He has some big test this week too, and I didn't want to distract him."

"Oh, Sam, you're not a distraction to him," Carly said gently. "He loves you. He'd drop whatever he's doing to talk to you. It's sweet that you want him to focus on his exam, but if you feel this awful then just pick up the dang phone and call him! The only reason he hasn't called you already is probably because I mentioned we have that huge sociology test tomorrow and he didn't want to distract _you_."

"You really don't think he'll mind if I call him?" Sam asked softly.

"Not one bit," Carly smiled, tossing Sam her phone. "Go ahead…you know you want to."

Sam chuckled. "Thanks, Shay."

"Why don't I go study in the lounge for a little bit?" Carly said. "So you can have some privacy. But we're still on for that all-nighter, just so you know. Consider this your first break."

"I get more than one, though, right?"

"We'll see," Carly smirked, heading out of the room.

Sam quickly dialed her boyfriend's phone number.

Freddie picked up on the fifth ring.

"Hello?" He sounded exhausted.

"Hey, baby," Sam said. "How's the studying going for that big test you have later this week?"

"It was actually today," Freddie mumbled on the other end. "I just walked out of the examination room a few minutes ago."

"Oh, really? Well how'd it go?" Sam asked. "Did you rock that test like you did to every single one you took back at Ridgeway? I bet you did. You probably-"

"I don't think I did well on it, Sam," Freddie sighed.

Sam frowned. "Hey," she said. "Don't say that. I'm sure you did fine. You're probably just second-guessing yourself right now. Wait till your professor gets your grade back to you. Then you'll-"

"I'm not second-guessing myself," Freddie said miserably. "But I _did _have to do a lot of guessing on the actual exam. I swear, out of the fifty questions on that thing, I think I knew like, eighteen."

"Was-Was it multiple choice?" Sam asked. "Because maybe even if you guessed, you still-"

"It wasn't multiple choice; they were all written response," Freddie told her.

"Oh," Sam said lamely.  
"I just…I just don't know what happened," Freddie sighed. "I studied! A lot! I don't think I left my dorm room for the entire weekend just to prepare for that thing. But still, when I looked at those questions, my mind just blew a blank."

"You were probably just stressed," Sam reasoned. "I mean, this was your first college exam, and it's at _MIT_, for crying out loud!"

"But this exam counts for like, thirty percent of my grade," Freddie said. "If I want to even _pass _the class, I'm going to have to get close to perfect scores on every other exam I take!"

"Well baby, you can do that," Sam said. "You're Freddie Benson!"

"Yeah, Freddie Benson the test-flunker," Freddie muttered darkly.

Sam sighed. She knew how horrible Freddie must've been feeling. School was so important for him. She could brush a failed exam off her back like nothing, but as far as she could remember, the closest to failing Freddie had ever come was a B+.

"You're not a test-flunker," Sam said firmly. "Baby, you're the smartest dude I know."

"Maybe back at Ridgeway, but here at MIT I'm probably one of the dumb ones," Freddie said.

"Nope," Sam said simply. "There's no way I'm going to believe that."

"But I-"

"So you _might've _done bad on _one _test," Sam cut him off. "Big deal! Everyone does bad once in awhile. That doesn't make you any less smart. And you're not dumb; even compared to any of those MIT nerds. Do you think any of _them _single-handedly kept one of the best web shows in the history of the Internet online for _five years_? Did any of them get special awards for accidently creating some device that fixes some weird eye problem? Did any of them get an invitation from the Pear Company to attend some huge app meeting over the summer? Baby, you're still _so_ smart. One test isn't going to change that."

"W-Wow," Freddie said weakly. "Sam, I-That was some speech."

"Well you're talking to the girl who just happened to ace her public speaking test last week," Sam grinned. "And it was completely _winged_. Remind me to bring that up to Carly later if she ever tries to use her 'you can't wing stuff in college' chiz again."

"She's not entirely wrong about that," Freddie chuckled. "College _does _require actual studying. But hey, thanks for that little pep talk, baby. I-I really needed that."

"And I mean it," Sam said. "You're a genius, Fredhead. Sure, it's annoying most of the times, but I _occasionally _think it's cute."

"Well how sweet," Freddie laughed. "But speaking of studying and everything, are you ready for that big sociology test you and Carly have tomorrow?"

"I sort of have seven chapters to read still," Sam admitted. "But me and Carly are going to pull an all-nighter, so maybe I'll manage to get some stuff read."

"You'll be fine," Freddie assured her.

"And if not, I'm used to failing things," Sam mumbled, looking down at her lap. "It won't bother me as much as it bothers you. So don't worry about me."

"Sam, you won't fail," Freddie said. "You're smart too. I mean, you got yourself into Washington State, didn't you? When you apply yourself, no one can beat you at anything. Even a test. Just focus and you'll ace it."

"Well I don't know about _acing _it…" Sam said.

"You'll do fine," Freddie said firmly. "And if I was with you right now, I'd-"

"-Be making out with me?" Sam suggested.

"I was going to say helping you study, but I like that too," Freddie said.

"Well, I wish you _were _here, even it was just to help me study," Sam said heavily.

"Me too," Freddie said. "I love you so much, Sam, and it kills me that I can't see you every day."  
Sam smiled as those three words managed to make her spine tingle even across the country. "Two more months until we're all back home for Thanksgiving, though."

"Believe me, I've been counting down the days since I got here," Freddie said. "Anyway, not that I don't love talking to you, but you really should get back to studying. And I'm going to get some food since I haven't eaten in almost two days."

"Two days?!"

"I'll call you tomorrow, to find out how your exam went," Freddie told her.

"Alright," Sam sighed. "I love you. Make sure you eat something, though, okay? Two days without food…that's disgraceful!"

"I will," Freddie said. "And I love you too. Oh, and thanks for, you know, cheering me up. It's impossible for me to stay down about much of anything when I get to talk to you."

…..

**AN-Hey, thanks so much for all the great support you guys all give this story! I really appreciate it and it's part of the reason I love writing and have kept this story going for so long, so again, big thanks to all of you out there for sending me awesome ideas for these oneshots and taking the time to read/review them. And hey there Julius thanks so much for your opinion:) To answer your question, no I have not given up on Seddie, which is one of the other reasons I've kept this story going, lol. I understand if you're not as into this story as you used to be; that's totally cool! And if you want to try a Seddie story that's more engrossing for you, Fanfiction's a big site, I'm sure you can find something more 'readable'. However, please don't feel forced to keep reading this if you don't like it. Just don't read it; I don't want you to feel like I'm 'feeding' this story to you. You are perfectly welcome to move on from it. With that being said, though, I love writing; it's one of my favorite past times, and I happen to be quite happy with it, so I'm sorry, but I will not 'quit writing forever', lol. I assure you, I put a lot of effort into every story I put up here. So with all do respect, if you decide to go find something else to read, I wish you luck and hope you find something you enjoy:) Again, I love writing this story and I thank everyone from the bottom of my heart for all the help and support you've given it!**


	368. Chapter 368

**AN-Hey, so this oneshot is actually a sort of iCarly/Sam&Cat/Victorious crossover. It's sort of a sequel to chapter 343, where Freddie visited Sam in LA and they wound up having a double date with Beck and Jade. I've included another oneshot after this in case you don't like Sam&Cat or Victorious. Hope you enjoy, and I tried my best to keep everyone in character, but like I've said before, I don't really write Bade fics, so I just did what I could:) And thanks for the support, everyone!**

…**..**

_Powder_

"Ha! Look at that doctor dig into that dude's shoulder," Jade West laughed.

"I know, look at all that puss!" Sam grinned. "Oh! I knew that doctor should've worn his goggles. Now his eye is full of shoulder puss."

"I wonder what shoulder puss feels like in your eye," Jade said thoughtfully. "I bet it hurts…a lot. Lucky guy…"

"Hey!" Cat said brightly, walking into her and Sam's shared apartment. "Guess what I just saw this dog doing out in the-Oh my God! Shoulder puss!"

"Yeah, isn't it cool?" Sam said.

"No!" Cat cried, shielding her eyes, which in turn caused her to trip over Sam's backpack and tumble over the couch onto Sam and Jade's laps.

"You have ten seconds to get off of my lap," Jade said, clenching her teeth.

"Well can you tell me when the ten seconds start?" Cat asked.

"Off!" Jade screamed.

"Okay!" Cat said, scrambling to her feet. "What are you guys watching anyway? This doesn't look like a light comedic sitcom."

"It's the surgery channel," Sam told her. "Hey, if I ever need surgery, how do you think I can get on here?"

"Why would you want the whole world to see your surgery?" Cat frowned. "That seems icky."  
"Exactly!" Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Oh! And now you can see part of his shoulder blade!" Jade said, turning the volume up.

"My stomach's making that weird feeling again," Cat said, placing a hand on her abdomen.

"Well get a bucket," Sam said.

"So Jade," Cat said, ignoring Sam's comment. "Did you come over here to work on out skit for Sikowitz's class?"

"No," Jade scoffed.

"But we need to finish it before-"

"Oh calm down, we can just get Robbie to do the whole thing for us," Jade said.

"I don't know…" Cat frowned.

"Hey! Look! They're going to show this dude's nose job tomorrow!" Sam said, looking at the television. "We have to watch that!"

"But Sam, tomorrow you and I are going to the toy store to pick out some things for the kids to play with when we baby sit," Cat reminded her.

"Yeah…that doesn't seem like something I would agree to," Sam said.

"But I asked you last night in our room," Cat said. "I said, 'Sam, let's go to the toy store tomorrow', and you said 'Yeah, that sounds like a lot of fun'."

"Cat," Sam moaned. "I wasn't talking to you! Didn't you see the phone pressed against my ear? I was talking to Freddie! He was telling me when I go back up to Seattle for Thanksgiving next month, we'd go to our favorite restaurant, Pinis."

"So no toy store?" Cat asked.

"No!"

"Oh sweet, extreme plastic surgeries is on now," Jade said. "I haven's seen this in ages."

"Yeah, I used to force Freddie to watch it with me back in Seattle," Sam said. "But he'd always wind up getting sick halfway through."

"No way! So does Beck!" Jade said.

"You make your boyfriends suffer through this too?" Cat asked, gagging as she watched a woman with a large mole that looked like George Washington prepare for surgery. "That's worse than the girl my brother dated who made him wash his hair with mayonnaise."

"What?" Sam frowned.

"It actually made his hair shinier though," Cat continued. "But then he got reminded of this dog catcher who used to chase him who _smelled_ like mayonnaise and he ran away and my parents had to call his special doctor to find him again. He was hiding in-"

"Hey Cat?" Jade cut her off.

"What?"

"Stop talking before I take your sparkly pink glue stick and glue your lips shut."

Cat gasped and quickly covered her mouth.

"It's always funny to see Freddie get all squeamish when we watch this," Sam said, smiling to herself. "Man he hates it so much."

"It always makes Beck miserable," Jade nodded happily.

"Um, you guys?" Cat asked, her voice muffled because she was still covering her mouth with her hands. "Can I ask you something?"

"For the last time, no," Sam sighed. "Your pet fish isn't going to swim back into the toilet. He was _dead _when you flushed him. He's not swimming anywhere."

"No, not that," Cat said.

"Then what?" Sam moaned.

"Well," Cat began. "I was just wondering…what do you guys see in Beck and Freddie?"

"What?" Jade frowned.

"You know," Cat said. "I know you guys like them and everything, but it seems like you like…_bothering _them a lot. Sam, you always call Freddie names and make fun of him, and Jade, you always yell at Beck."

"So?" Sam snapped defensively.

"Yeah, so?" Jade nodded. "Who made you the relationship police?"

"Hey, that's the online dating site my Nona used to use!" Cat grinned. "She got matched up with this baker who hacked her Getflix account and ordered this movie about a talking koala bear who-"

"Hey, isn't it today your stuffed kangaroo's birthday?" Sam said.

"What? No!" Cat said. "It's not the eighteenth."

"Um, yes it is," Sam lied quickly.

Cat gasped. "Shut the French toast! It is? I forgot? Oh no! I didn't get Powder a card or anything!"

"Who names a kangaroo Powder?" Jade asked.

"Oh, see, when I was nine, my mom and I were eating _chowder_, and my brother thought he was a kangaroo, and-"

"Cat! The card!" Sam interrupted.

"Oh, right!" Cat cried, grabbing her purse. "I'll go buy Powder a card, and you guys bake him a cake, okay? And-And we'll just pretend that this whole thing is a surprise party so he won't be mad at me for not saying anything to him when I was putting on his bow tie this morning!"

"Sounds like a plan, now go," Sam said.

"I'm on it!" Cat yelled, running out of the apartment.

"Yeah…" Jade said as Cat slammed the door behind her. "We're not baking a cake."

"Shoosh no," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "But sometimes that chick can-"

"Irritate you in ways that make you want to stab something?" Jade finished.

"I-I was going to say she could be stressful," Sam said. "But that works too. And what was she talking about? Saying we're always mean to our boyfriends?"

"Well you can't just be nice to them all the time!" Jade snapped.  
"Yeah, we need to let them know who's in charge!" Sam nodded. "That doesn't mean we don't see good things in them…occasionally. It's just funner to bug the living chiz out of them."

"Yeah! I'm not gonna sit there and gush over Beck's unnaturally shiny hair like most girls," Jade said. "And he _deserves _to be yelled at most of the time! You know he didn't even tell me his was Canadian?"

"Well Freddie practically _begs _for me to make fun of him," Sam said. "He always goes on and on about _Galaxy Wars _and computers and homework. What am I supposed to do? _Not _call him a nerd?" she shook her head. "That's just impossible!"

The two girls were silent for a few minutes, both watching as the plastic surgeon on the T.V. began to cut into the oddly shaped mole.

"I mean," Sam mumbled. "I guess I _do _sort of like when he act nerdy sometimes. It's sort of cute…but that doesn't mean I'm not allowed to give him a hard time about it! If I was all sweet to him when he did his dork stuff, he'd-"

"-Rub it in your face all the time," Jade nodded. "_Exactly_."

"We have reputations!" Sam exclaimed.

"Yeah, like when I yell at Beck for being all calm every stupid minute of his life," Jade told her. "It's annoying sometimes, but there's some times when it's _not exactly_ the most excruciating thing in the world. But if I _say_ that, then the next thing I know, I lose my intimidation factor and I become as bad as Cat!"

"And if I start being all goo-goo eyed and letting everyone know how much I like looking at Freddie's muscles, I'm not the tough chick anymore," Sam said. "I'm just the chick who likes drooling over his because I can't use my own! I'll become a Carly!"

"What's a Carly?" Jade asked.

"She's my best friend from Seattle," Sam said quickly. "But the point is that we don't not like the things we give the guys a hard time about…we just don't want to let them get too cocky."

"It's either harassment or scissors shoved in their car seats," Jade added. "We've got to keep them in line somehow."

"Well duh," Sam nodded. "Oh! Look! Her mole started squirting yellow stuff!"

"Ha! Bet that chick's rich husband's gonna have to pay extra for that!" Jade laughed. "Turn it up more, I think I hear her screaming something about maggots…"


	369. Chapter 369

_Ski_

"Hey Spencer," Freddie said brightly, letting himself into the Shay's apartment.

"What's up, Freddo?" Spencer greeted him, looking up from the sculpture he was working on.

"What's that?" Freddie asked, looking at Spencer's work.

"No idea," Spencer said.

"So then how are you going to sell it?" Freddie frowned.

"That's the beauty of it; I already have!" Spencer grinned. "See, I met this dude at the Armenian Deli who I started chatting up about Seattle duck problem, and it turns out his granddaughter's sister-in-law's boyfriend's uncle's step niece is having a birthday party soon and she's a big fan of abstract art. So he paid me four hundred dollars to make her an abstract sculpture. I call it: The Sculpture of Many Colors and Odors."

"Odors?" Freddie repeated.

"Yeah, it's scented too!" Spencer said excitedly. "Go on, sniff my sculpture!"

"I'll pass," Freddie chuckled. "Hey, are Carly and Sam upstairs though? We need to get some things ready for iCarly."

"Yeah, they're both up there," Spencer nodded.

"Cool, thanks!" Freddie said, hurrying upstairs. He reached the hallway that led right to the iCarly studio, and was just about to go inside, when he heard Carly and Sam's voice's drifting out through the half-open door.

"You need to talk to him, Sam," Carly said firmly, and Freddie stopped in his tracks.

"I know," Sam sighed. "But you know it's going to be hard."

"Freddie can handle it; he's a big boy," Carly reasoned.

_What can I handle_? Freddie frowned, wondering what Carly and his girlfriend could possibly be talking about.

"I know but still," Sam said.

"Well do you want this or not?" Carly asked.

"Of course I do! But it doesn't make this part anymore easy," Sam mumbled.

_Doesn't make what easy? _Freddie asked himself, holding his breath to make sure he heard every word the two girls were saying.

"Well it's what's going to be best for you and Freddie," Carly said. "Even if it is a little awkward at first. I mean, it's what you have to do."

_I don't like the sound of this_, Freddie thought.

"Yeah, you're right," Sam said. "But I just wish there was another way."

"It will be worth it in the end," Carly assured her. "Your relationship with Freddie isn't what it used to be. Both of you have grown up a lot since you began dating. It's natural for this sort of thing to come up, and everyone just needs to learn to live with it. And that includes-"

"Alright," Sam conceded. "I-I'll talk to him tomorrow."

_Wait a minute…_Freddie thought slowly to himself, his eyes widening. _It almost sounds like…Is she…Is she talking about breaking up with me? Oh man…No! No! I don't want that!_

But the more he thought about what he had just heard, the more sense it made. Carly was obviously trying to get Sam to bring up an uncomfortable issue with him, Carly said that their relationship wasn't what it used to be…

_She's going to break up with me_, Freddie concluded sadly to himself, feeling as if the entire world around him was shattering. And then quickly, so that Sam and Carly wouldn't know he had heard them, he raced back out of the hall and downstairs.

"It won't be that bad," Carly continued, sitting down next to her best friend on a beanbag chair. "And like I said, it's gonna be so worth it! Think about it, a ski trip with your boyfriend!"  
"_If _he can convince him mom once I tell him about it," Sam reminded her. "Which is never going to happen."

"Oh, you never know, Mrs. Benson could surprise you," Carly said. "I told you, you and Freddie aren't the same couple you used to be. You guys are so much closer now, she should realize that and let him go with you."

"Yeah, otherwise I'm gonna be stuck up at that ski lodge with my mom and _her _boyfriend," Sam shuddered.

….

"Wait, how do you _know _Sam's gonna dump you?" Gibby frowned as him and Freddie sat down at the Groovy Smoothie later that day.

"For the millionth time, I _heard _her talking to Carly about it!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Okay, easy there, just trying to keep my facts straight," Gibby said, scribbling something down in a notepad.

"What are you writing down?" Freddie asked.

"Oh, well, I started writing a journal," Gibby said. "So I like to make sure I get down every detail of my day so that way in two hundred years, when the people are craving more Gibby, but can't have me because I'm dead, they can still experience my thrilling life!"

"Don't write about my relationship problems in your journal!" Freddie yelled.

"Fine," Gibby shrugged. "I'll just write about your snippy attitude."

"Will you help me or not?" Freddie moaned.

"Dude, come on, if Sam's going to break up with you, all you have to do is make sure that doesn't happen," Gibby said, rolling his eyes. "Duh."

"Really? Well that's helpful, because I was planning on dressing up like a sugar plum fairy!"

"Well I don't see what that would do, but if you want to borrow some sparkly tights-"

"Gibby!"

"Alright," Gibby said. "Well why do you think Sam's breaking up with you?"

"I-I don't know," Freddie said truthfully. "I thought our relationship was fine. Great, even."

"Maybe it's because of your tacky shirts," Gibby suggested, adjusting the collar of his Hawaiian flower print shirt. "The way your pronounce 'during', your weird hair, your unsymmetrical eyebrows, your-"

"Are you done?" Freddie snapped.

"Almost," Gibby said. "Your abnormal head shape, your dandruff problem-"

"I don't have a dandruff problem!"

"Hey, don't get all defensive with _me_," Gibby said. "I'm not the one breaking up with you."

"But what do I _do_?" Freddie asked. "I don't want to break up with Sam! I can't go back to being single and alone!"

"Hey," Gibby grinned, putting an arm around Freddie's shoulders. "Don't worry about it. You're in good hands. Let Gibby take care of everything."

…..

"I'm not sure about this," Freddie said as him and Gibby walked into the school the next morning.

"Come on, have I ever steered you wrong?" Gibby pointed out.

"Where would you like me to begin?"

"Dude, trust me, there's no way Sam's going to dump you if you just stick to our plan," Gibby said. "Now look, there she is with Carly over by their lockers. Go get her!"

"Alright," Freddie said, taking a deep breath.

He slowly walked over towards the girls, who were talking and laughing as they put books into their lockers.

"H-Hey!" Freddie said, pulling on the biggest grin he could muster.

"Hey, Freddie," Carly smiled.  
"Hey, Fredbug," Sam said, turning to her boyfriend, "Listen, I need to-Whoa! Is that _cologne_ you're wearing?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded, trying not to choke over the fumes of the cologne he had borrowed from Gibby. "You like it?"

"I'll let you know when my nose starts working again," Sam coughed.

"Um, I'll leave you two to…talk," Carly said, closing her locker and walking off, leaving the couple alone.

"Right," Sam said, still dizzy over the sent of the cologne. "Anyway, baby, I-"

"Wait!" Freddie said, digging in his backpack and pulling out a large bouquet of flowers. "These are for you."

"Aw, you bought me flowers?" Sam smiled.

"These aren't just flowers," Freddie grinned, reaching over to the bouquet and pressing a button that Sam just noticed on one of the leaves. Loud music began blaring from the flowers, causing everyone within twenty feet of the couple to look over and stare. "They're musical flowers!"

"Oh, that-that's…new," Sam said, her cheeks reddening as she noticed just how many people were staring at them. "Now how do you get them to stop?"

"You can't stop the music of love-"

"Freddie!"

"Okay, okay," Freddie said quickly, pushing the button again.

"Why'd you get me musical-" Sam began.

"Are you from Tennessee?" Freddie interrupted her.

"_What_?"

"Because you're the only _ten I see_," Freddie said. "Get it?"

"What's wrong with you?" Sam frowned.

"Did it hurt?" Freddie asked, now visibly sweating.

"Huh?"

"When-When you fell from-"

"Okay, what is going on?" Sam demanded. "Why are you soaked in cologne, giving me weird flowers and pulling the lamest, cheesiest pick-up lines of all time?"

"I-I-" Freddie stuttered.

_Oh forget it_, he surrendered. _I should've never listened to Gibby with all this_.

"Look, Sam," he sighed. "I-I just couldn't give us up without putting in _some _effort to keep us going."

"Give us up?" Sam repeated. "Why would we-"

"I just love you so much, which is going to make me seem even more pathetic in a few more minutes, once you break up with me," Freddie continued.

Sam's eyes widened.

"But when I found out that you wanted this, I-I felt heartbroken, and-"

"Wait a minute," Sam said. "You think I'm breaking up with you? Why?"

"You don't have to try and protect me anymore," Freddie said heavily. "I heard you and Carly yesterday in the studio talking about it."

"Oh, baby, I wasn't-"

"And-And I realize that the tighter I hold onto you, the harder you're going to pull away," Freddie went on. "And that I need to let you go. I really do get that. But I just need to know if there's _anything-_"

"Freddie! I'm not breaking up with you!" Sam blurted out.

Freddie blinked. "What? You-You're not?"

"No," Sam grinned. "I'm not."

"Well then," Freddie said, taking this news in. "That-that's _fantastic_!" He threw his arms around his girlfriend and placed a deep kiss on her lips.

"Is that why you're acting like a complete loser with the cologne and pick-up lines?" Sam asked.

"Well when I thought you were gonna dump me, I panicked!" Freddie defended. "I went to Gibby and-"

"Gibby?" Sam laughed. "Man, you must've been _desperate_."

"Tell me about it," Freddie mumbled. "But, wait a minute. If you aren't going to break up with me…then what's the big thing you need to talk to me about?"

"Well," Sam said slowly. "My-My mom's dating this dude that owns a timeshare at a ski lodge. We're going down to Colorado next week to stay there, and-and she said that I could invite you to come…if you want. I just think that it'd be a lot of fun, especially since our relationship is going so great."

"That's what you wanted to talk to me about?" Freddie smiled. "Baby! Of _course _I want to go with you! A trip to a ski lodge with my beautiful girlfriend? I couldn't think of anything I'd want to do more! Why would you think this would be awkward and hard to bring up?"

"It wasn't _you _I was worried about convincing to go," Sam said. "You do realize who your mother is, right?"

"Oh," Freddie said, his smile faltering. "Right…I have to ask my crazy, over-protective mother. Well, that's gonna go well."

"Well, Carly said she might surprise you," Sam said. "But I wouldn't hold out for that. Or maybe Spencer can talk to her? Or I can clean my mom up and your mom can talk with _her _since she'll be there with us."

"I promise," Freddie said, leaning down to kiss her again. "That I will try as hard as I can to get her to agree, okay?"

"Okay," Sam smiled. "Maybe you can threaten to stop going to your mother-son Pilates classes."

"You _know _about those?!"

"You can't hide things from Mama," Sam smirked.

"I should've know," Freddie chuckled. He put his arm around her. "Hey…I'm glad you didn't break up with me."

Sam squeezed his hand. "You don't have to worry about that, baby. You've sort of grown on me."


	370. Chapter 370

**AN-So in this chapter, Sam and Freddie aren't dating, and they don't get back together. It's just supposed to show that even though they're broken up, there's still a lot of chemistry between them. Hope you like it!**

…

_Rhythm_

"Unbelievable," Sam said, shaking her head as she looked through the box of nail polish that Carly kept under her bed. "The girl owns forty different shades of pink, but she doesn't own one bottle of black!"

"There are not forty shades of pink," Freddie said, looking up from the Pearpad he was playing on the love seat in Carly's room.

"Um, let's see," Sam said, looking through the box. "There's hot pink, tickle-me-pink, coral pink, neon pink, playful pink-oh _God_."

"That's a lot of pink," Freddie chuckled.

"And there's no way any of it is going on _my _nails," Sam said, continuing to search. "Hmm…I could probably work blue…or red."

"Since when do you even wear nail polish anyway?" Freddie asked, amused. "Didn't you say it makes your meat taste funny?"

"Well that shows you how bored I am," Sam smirked, deciding on a light blue shade and going over to sit on the pink sofa next the love seat. "Carly's out living it up in Yakima, and I'm stuck here painting my fingernails…baby blue. Hey, why do they call it baby blue? Babies aren't blue. Shouldn't you use 'baby' to describe a gross fleshy color? Or here's a better question, why do they have to use 'baby' at all? It just confuses _everyone_. And since when is pink ticklish? And-"

"Yeah, you must be _really _bored," Freddie said, rolling his eyes as he watched Sam take off her shoes and set to work painting her toes. "If you're sitting here debating colors."

"Ha, ha," Sam said dryly. "Hey, why are you hanging out in Carly's room anyway? Isn't crazy going to be calling in the secret service to come looking for you soon? I mean it _is _almost nine o'clock."

"My mom happens to be working the graveyard shift at the hospital tonight," Freddie said happily. "Which means until five A.M., I am a free agent."

"And again, you're spending your night in a teenage girl's room playing Fortress Runner," Sam pointed out.

"Well there's nothing else to do," Freddie moaned. "Spencer's with Carly in Yakima, Gibby's at Guppy's dance recital in Olympia, T-Bo's having a melt down over orange peels-"

"Which leaves you with me," Sam grinned.

"Yeah, well, seems like _you're _having a wild Saturday night," Freddie said. "You're painting your nails baby blue."

"Do you want me to start my color rant again?"  
"No I do not."

"Good, then can it," Sam said. "I need to concentrate."

"You need to concentrate on painting your nails?" Freddie asked. "You don't even try concentrating when you're taking a math test."

"Math is stupid," Sam said simply.

"Well as vice president of the school's math club, I thank you for that," Freddie said, tossing his Pearpad down.

"There's a math _club_?" Sam exclaimed. "And Principal Franklin wouldn't let me start a Numchuck enthusiast club?"

"Ha!" Freddie said triumphantly.

"Yeah, real smart, insult the girl who knows enough about Numchucks to start a club," Sam mumbled. She sighed as she finished up her nails. "Well…now I'm bored again."

"Then what do you want to do?" Freddie asked.

"Nothing."

"Do you _hear _yourself?" Freddie chuckled.

"Hey," Sam said, grinning. "Wanna prank Carly?"

"You want to prank your best friend?"

"Oh come on, it won't be a _mean _prank," Sam said. "Just something to entertain us for a few hours. I mean, it's her own fault for leaving us while she jetted off to take car of her granddad's toe thing."

"What kind of prank do you have in mind?" Freddie asked slowly.

"Atta boy, Benson!" Sam said happily. She looked around the room, her eyes stopping at Carly's closet. "Oh yeah…Carly's _shoes_."

"Whoa, her _shoes_?" Freddie repeated, his eyes growing wide. "Carly's shoes are like her _children. _I'm pretty sure she's even _named _some of them!"

"Exactly, that's what's going to make this so funny," Sam said, hurrying over to Carly's computerized closet.

"Make what funny?" Freddie asked, getting up and joining her at the closet.

Sam entered in Carly's password on the digital alarm and slid the door open. She grabbed a pair of black boots. "We're going to switch every pair of shoes in here with a pair of Spencer's."

"Oh my God, no way!" Freddie laughed. "She'll _freak_."

"I know!" Sam said, tossing him the boots. "Alright, this is probably going to be an hour long task…Carly's a shoe chick. There's got to be at _least _thirty-seven pairs of shoes in here. Grab as many as you can, but do _not _scuff any of them. You may be a total nub, but even you don't deserve Carly's shoe wrath."

As Sam predicted, it took the two close to an hour to move all of Carly's shoes into Spencer's closet and put all of his pairs in hers.

"Well, we did it," Freddie said, staring at Carly's closet, which was now filled with Spencer's old sneakers.

"I can't wait to see the look on Carly's face," Sam said. "She's going to open her closet and BAM! Boy shoes!"

"Worse, Spencer shoes," Freddie grinned.

Sam laughed.

"We done good, Puckett," Freddie said happily.

"Shoosh yeah we did, Benson," Sam said, smiling at him. "You know, who knew you could actually be helpful with a prank."

"I've pulled pranks before!"  
"Yeah, yeah, with the raisins at Boy's Camp," Sam said, rolling her eyes playfully. "You're a crazy, crazy punk."

"Well I learned from the from the best," Freddie said, putting an arm around his blonde best friend.

Sam chuckled and looked up at him.

Suddenly, a silence fell over the two teens as they simply took a minute to stare into the others eyes. Finally, Freddie broke the silence as he awkwardly removed his arm from around Sam and Sam cleared her throat.

"So," Sam said. "Um…now that we pranked Carly…you up for a round or _Rhythm Riot_ on the Game Sphere?"

"Sure," Freddie shrugged. "Even though you've never beaten me at that game."

"Excuse me," Sam frowned. "I've beaten you _several _times."

"You have not!"

"You can't play that game to save your life!" Sam exclaimed. "You have no musical skills!"

"It's a video game, Sam! I don't need music skill!"

"So you admit you have no skill?"

"I admit nothing!"

…

"Three things of hand sanitizer!" Carly ranted as she dragged her suitcase back up to her room the next evening, having just returned from Yakima. "And I can still smell Granddad's feet on my hands!"

"Why were you touching your Granddad's feet?" Freddie frowned.

"Because Spencer refused to, and the doctor said he needed regular foot massages to speed his toe healing process!" Carly snapped.

"So why didn't you wear gloves or something?" Sam asked as the three entered Carly's room.

"Oh, I did," Carly said. "_Two _pairs! They didn't do a dang thing!"

"Aw, cheer up, just because your hands smell like elderly feet, doesn't mean you have to be all crotchety," Freddie said.

Sam laughed. "Crotchety."

"Yeah, I know," Freddie grinned.

"Children," Carly mumbled, rolling her eyes.

"Hey, why don't we hit the smoothie?" Sam suggested. "You can't be crotchety-mad! I said mad…You can't be mad sipping a smoothie!"

"Well, okay," Carly nodded. "But these shoes are sort of pinching my feet; I've had them on all day. Let me just get a pair of sandals and then we can go."

"Oh man," Freddie whispered as Carly started towards her closet. "She's gonna see!"

"I know!" Sam said, snickering.

"What are you guys saying?" Carly asked, looking over her shoulder as she typed in the code to get into her closet.

"Nothing," Sam said quickly.

Carly shrugged and pressed the final button on her lock screen, causing the door to start to slide open.

"She's gonna freak!" Freddie said softly, looking at Sam's face, which was etched with excitement and anticipation.

"Should I go with my gold sandals?" Carly asked as the door fully opened. "Or my silver ones. Or maybe my-Oh my God!"

"She freaked!" Sam said, bursting out in laughter.'

"Yeah she did!" Freddie nodded, shaking as well.

"What-What happened?" Carly exclaimed, holding up one of Spencer's sneakers. "Where are all my shoes?"

"You mean that pair of sneakers with the gum on the bottoms doesn't belong to you?" Sam asked innocently.

"Wonder what it's doing in your closet then," Freddie grinned.

"Why are these all Spencer's shoes? Where are my babies?" Carly demanded. "Where are Roberta and Cynthia and Maya? What's happening? What-" she narrowed her eyes at her best friends, who could barely stand straight from all their laughter. "Oh you didn't."

"We got you good!" Sam said, holding onto Freddie's shoulder for support as she continued to guffaw.

"She was all like…Ah!" Freddie sniggered, clutching his sides. "And then she was all like…_Roberta_!"

"This was priceless!" Sam cried.

"Hilarious!"

"You two are insane!" Carly exclaimed. "Insane and nutty!"

"Do you want us to leave now so you can scream into a pillow?" Sam asked, her face still red from laughed.

"Yeah, that'd be fantastic, thanks!" Carly snapped.

"Oh man, that was better than I imagined!" Freddie said to Sam as they left the room. He gave her a high-five.

"I wish we caught that on video," Sam said.

"Oh, but we did," Freddie said, pulling his Pearphone out of his pocket.

"No way!"

"What kind of tech nerd doesn't capture the best prank ever on video?" Freddie grinned. "Hey, we should probably give Carly some space for a little bit until she becomes less-"

"-Crotchety?"

"Yeah," Freddie chuckled. "Wanna go watch the video down at the smoothie?"

"Oh yeah, and T-Bo's selling pot pies on sticks!" Sam nodded. "Mama loves pot pies."

As the teens raced down the stairs, they met Spencer by the front door, wearing a pair of heels that were clearly a good four sizes too small on him.

"I think there's been a mistake," he said simply.


	371. Chapter 371

_Priest_

"Hey Princess Puckett," Freddie grinned, walking into Carly and Sam's shared apartment with Gibby at his heels. He leaned down to give his fiancé, who was laying on the sofa with a bowl of popcorn, a quick kiss.

"You won't be able to call her that much longer," Carly pointed out. "Soon it will be Princess Benson."

Sam grinned, moving over to make room for Freddie next to her. "So did you guys order the pizza?"

"Yeah, it's on the way," Freddie nodded, wrapping his arms around her.

"Hey, by the way, I invited a friend over here," Gibby said.

Sam frowned. "Since when do you have other friends?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Exactly what it sounds like…" Sam said. "That you don't have other friends. You're lucky you somehow roped us into your life. And anyway, you can't just invite total strangers to our apartment! That's totally-"

"Now, now," Carly cut her off. "Gibby's allowed to have other friends. I think it's great that you're bringing someone new into our little circle of pals, Gib. Now, tell me, this friend of yours…does he happen to be a cute, single dude?"

"You are unbelievable, Shay," Freddie chuckled.

"Well with all this wedding talk going on, I'm starting to feel lonely!" Carly defended.

"Oh, speaking of the wedding," Freddie said, turning to Sam. "I found-"

"No! No!" Sam said quickly, covering her ears with her hands. "No wedding talk tonight, remember! I just spent six hours with Carly looking at wedding dresses, and I'm exhausted! I just want to watch a movie, eat some pizza, and not think about flower arrangements or dresses or any of the other stuff that stresses me out."

"Fine," Freddie shrugged. "I guess I _won't _tell you how I managed to get Father McGarthy, the world's fattest priest, to officially marry us."

"Whoa, are you serious?" Sam exclaimed. "My idol's gonna be at my wedding?"

"I can't say, you don't want to talk about wedding stuff," Freddie said. He gave her a quick peck on the lips. "But yeah, he's gonna be there."

"Oh my God! I love you, baby!" Sam cried, attacking Freddie's lips with her own.

"Man…I hope your friend's cute, Gib," Carly sighed, watching her two best friend begin their make out session.

Just then there was a knock at the door, pulling Sam and Freddie back into reality.

"Oh! That's Ruben!" Gibby said excitedly, running to the door.

"Ruben?" Freddie repeated. "Ruben…why does that name ring a bell?"

"Isn't a Ruben a sandwich?" Carly asked.

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "But Fredward's right. I feel like we met a Ruben that was a friend of Gibby's before, I just can't remember when."

"You know, I think you guys are right," Carly said. "Maybe it was at his sixteenth birthday party, or-Wait! I remember! It was back when we were thirteen!"

"Okay, so you remember something from ten years ago now, but you couldn't remember to buy me more bacon yesterday?" Sam frowned.

"When did we meet him when we were thirteen?" Freddie asked.

"Well, if it's the same Ruben…" Carly said. "It was back when we first started doing iCarly. And Gibby was all depressed-"

"That must've been before he started taking that special medicine," Sam chuckled.

"-He was depressed because he wanted to ask out some girl," Carly continued. "So we did that-"

"-Dating game," Freddie nodded. "Yeah, I remember that. But there was no Ruben there."

"No, but Gibby screwed up the dating game and wound up on a date with me, so _you _went on the date with us with the girl _he _liked, and I made Sam come with us-"

"-With his weird friend Ruben!" Sam gasped. "Holy chiz that's right! Man, I forgot all about that! That dude was a basket case, though. Remember? He kept saying the weirdest stuff."

"Eh, he's an adult now, maybe he's not _that _weird anymore," Freddie reasoned. "Just be nice to him, though, Sam."

"Why do I-?"

"Sam," Freddie said, raising an eyebrow.

"Fine," Sam conceded.

"Hey, you guys," Gibby said, walking back into the room, accompanied by a tall, very handsome blonde boy. "This is my old pal Ruben. He used to go to school with us, but then he moved to Australia."

"Hi!" Carly grinned, jumping to her feet and holding out a hand. "I'm Carly. We met briefly when we were thirteen. Wow, you've got quite a tan there, and-"

"Down, girl,' Sam said, yanking her best friend back down on the couch.

"Hey, nice to see you again," Freddie said, shaking Ruben's hand. "I'm Freddie-"

"Oh yeah, I remember you," Ruben grinned. "You were the scrawny dude!"

"Sure," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Hey, you talk normal now," Sam pointed out. "I remember back when we first met you _no one _could understand anything that came out of your mouth."

"What are you talking about?" Gibby frowned. "Do you know how many late night phone calls me and this guy used to have, Sam? But then he moved to Australia where the time's all backwards and I had to settle for talking to Freddie."

"Yeah, that's not offensive," Freddie mumbled.

"Wait, Sam? I remember you!" Ruben said, giving Sam a hug, which caught her off guard. "Yeah! We went on a date…then you made me cry."

"Um, that-that wasn't a date," Sam said quickly. "That was my best friend getting even with me for making her help me rub lotion all over my chicken pox covered mother."

"Speaking of dating," Carly said, getting back to her feet. "I bet a handsome dude like you has a girlfriend, right?"

"No, I'm single," Ruben said, still staring at Sam.

"Oh! Well then-"

"Hey, Ruben, why don't we tell these guys our cool knock-knock joke?" Gibby interrupted. "My sides are still hurting from when you told it to me on the phone the other day."

"Maybe later," Ruben said, sitting down next to Sam. "Wow, you have really pretty hair."

"Um…thanks," Sam said, giving him a strange look.

Freddie, who had his arm draped around Sam's shoulders, frowned, but said nothing.

"No, I mean it's really beautiful," Ruben said, taking a golden lock and twirling it in his fingers. "And soft…like an angels."

"Yeah, well…conditioner," Sam said awkwardly, quickly pulling her hair out of his grasp.

"Um, so," Freddie said, clapping his hands together. "Who's ready to watch the movie? It's a good one, Sam picked it out. It's supposed to be really scary."

"I love scary movies," Ruben said, moving a bit closer to Sam. "Hey, if you get scared-"

"I don't get scared," Sam said firmly. "But _something's _starting to make me _annoyed-_"

"Um, Gibby, why don't you take a seat," Freddie said, signaling for Gibby to sit in between Sam and Ruben.

"Okay," Gibby shrugged, plopping down in the nearby recliner.

"No, Gibby!" Freddie hissed. "I meant-"

"That's okay, I'll just take this spot then," Carly said, sitting in between Ruben and Sam, and Freddie sighed in relief. "So, Ruben, tell me about Australia-"

….

About an hour later, the five adults were watching their movie as they ate their pizza and popcorn.

"Okay, I'm so lost," Carly said. "Why is the killer hiding in the vending machine?"

"Because he's trying to figure out how he can get the amulet!" Sam said, reaching for the bowl of popcorn on Carly's lap. The second she did, Ruben, who had been watching her out of the corner of his eyes, reached into the bowl too, so that their hands met.

Freddie noticed this, and he felt his fists clench. Who did this guy think he was? Ever since he got here, he had been blatantly hitting on Sam! He kept saying how hot she looked, he was practically holding her hand in the popcorn bowl and he had even begun flexing his muscles, trying to get her attention!

"Gibby," Freddie said hotly, getting to his feet. "Can I have a word with you in the kitchen?"

"Why?" Gibby frowned.

"Just come on!" Freddie hissed, grabbing his wrist and pulling him into the other room.

"What?" Gibby said. "I was getting into that movie!"

"Will you do something about Ruben?" Freddie said angrily.

"You see it too?" Gibby sighed.

"Yes!"

"Look, I told him when I invited him over that he couldn't hog all the popcorn," Gibby said. "But that guy's got a problem. He's probably eating just as much as Sam!"

"No, Gibby!" Freddie exclaimed. "I meant do something about him flirting with my fiancé!"

"Sam?"

"No, my _other _fiancé!" Freddie snapped.

"You have _two _fiancés?" Gibby gasped. "Dude, not cool. I don't think Sam would be okay with-"

"I don't have two fiancés!" Freddie cried, frustrated.

"Well I sure hope not," Carly said, joining the two in the kitchen.

"Carly!" Freddie said. "What's going on? I thought you were into Ruben! Why aren't you trying to couple up with him? Huh?"

"I tried," Carly shrugged, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge. "But he doesn't seem interested."

"Oh, so now all of the sudden you're just the type of girl who gives up when a hot guy doesn't seem into you? You're Carly Shay! You never give up!"

"Okay, thanks for making me sound completely desperate," Carly frowned. "Why are you freaking out?"

"Because Ruben's in there all flirty with Sam," Freddie moaned. "And it's starting to really bug me."

"Ah," Carly nodded.

"So who's this other fiancé?" Gibby asked.

"Gibby!"

"Well, thanks for leaving me in there with creepy," Sam said, coming into the kitchen. "Can you control your friend, Gib?"

"See, he _has_ been flirting with her!" Freddie said, putting his arm around Sam. Then he looked down at her. "Wait, if you noticed he was flirting with you, why haven't you shut him down yet?!"

"Because _somebody _made me promise to be nice!" Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Oh since when do you listen to me?" Freddie scoffed.

"So are you telling me that you _want _me to be mean and rude to this guy?" Sam asked.

"More than ever, baby," Freddie nodded.

"Hey, did we move the party to the kitchen?" Ruben asked. "Wow, Sam, those jeans fit you better than-"

"I've got this," Sam whispered to Freddie. She stepped over to Ruben and cleared her throat. "Ruben? You're horseradish village is more vuldacious than forty rat blobs who can't tell their tinglecrops from the bellmags and have less ostriciousy than a can of whipped corn on a hot day in Nantucket."

Gibby gasped.

Ruben's grin faltered. "W-What? You mean that?"

"Every word," Sam said.

"Oh my God! I feel like I was just punched by a puppy!" Ruben sobbed, turned to run out of the apartment.

"Ruben!" Gibby called after his friend starting after him. "Wait!" He turned to Sam and narrowed his eyes. "You _never _bring up a man's horseradish village. Or his tinglecrops!"

"Wow," Carly said. "Guess he's not completely over his…strangeness."

"What did you _say _to him?" Freddie asked, amused.

"No idea," Sam shrugged. "But hey, if it worked last time…"

"That's my fiancé," Freddie chuckled, pulling Sam into a deep kiss.

"So," Carly said. "Are we gonna get back to that movie? Or should we go see if Ruben's okay?"

Freddie and Sam exchanged quick looks.

"I mean, that movie was just starting to get pretty suspenseful…" Freddie said.

"We wouldn't want to miss the dumb chick accidently making out with the killer, now would we?" Sam asked.

"Well can we at least rewind it?" Carly asked. "Because I'm still so lost."

….

**AN-Hey, so tomorrow morning I'm heading back up to college, so that means that these daily updates are going to be stopping soon. I actually have some oneshots already finished and ready to be posted, so I'll keep putting those up, but once those are gone, updates will be less frequent. I'll try to have something up at least once a week, though. But my actual classes don't start for another week and a half (I have to move up really early for part of an organization I'm in) so I hopefully won't be too busy and can some writing done before I get weighed down by classes. Thanks so much for keeping up with this story and supporting it! And if you have anymore requests, feel free to send them in!**


	372. Chapter 372

_Icon_

"You guys have no idea how much I need this night in," Carly sighed, carrying a bowl of popcorn out to the couch in the Shay's living room. "This week has really been tough for me. I didn't do too hot on my Physics test, I got detention for texting in Brigg's class, Spencer shrunk my favorite sweatshirt in the wash and-"

She stopped, catching sight of her two best friends caught up in a heavy make-out session. She rolled her eyes.

"You guys?" Carly sighed. "You guys!"

"Oh, you finished making the popcorn?" Sam asked, pulling away from Freddie. "Sweet."

"Are you guys going to make out through the whole movie?" Carly asked, setting the popcorn down on the coffee table as she sat down next to Sam. "You know, like you do every other time we watch something together."

"You okay Carls?" Freddie asked, sensing her tone.

"Yeah," Carly mumbled. "Sorry. I just-I just really want to enjoy a night with my best friends tonight and that _is _sort of hard to do when their lips are glued to each other's."

"Oh, right," Sam said, blushing slightly. "Well, don't worry about that, kid. Tonight is _our _night; all three of us."

"Exactly," Freddie nodded.

"Thanks, I really appreciate that," Carly smiled, grabbing the remote to start the movie.

Carly was sitting, perfectly content, for close half-an-hour, enjoying the comedy she had selected earlier that day.

"This movie's hilarious," she chuckled, popping a few popcorn kernels into her mouth. "I forgot how funny Jim-"

She turned over to her best friends, who were lips were once again pressed against the others.

"Hey!" Carly exclaimed.

"Huh? What?" Freddie sputtered as they quickly pulled apart.

"You told me that you weren't going to just sit around and make out tonight!" Carly said, exasperated.

"We-We didn't mean to," Sam said quickly. "We just sort of…We kind of-"

"Yeah, whatever," Carly said, shaking her head. "Now can we get back to the movie, please?"

"Absolutely," Freddie nodded.

Another twenty minutes had passed, and Carly was once again immersed in the film.

"Wow, how do you think the editors got the monkey to look that real," Carly said. "Do you think it was some new software, Freddie? Or maybe-Oh come on!"

"Sorry!" Sam exclaimed, dethatching her lips from Freddie's . "It-It was an accident!"  
"How was it an accident?" Carly snapped. "Did your lips just gravitate towards each other?"

"Um…yes?" Freddie lied lamely.

"You guys," Carly sighed, pausing the movie. "I-I know you two are a couple and have _those feelings_ and love kissing each other every chance you get, and I think that's great but I thought tonight was going to be like old times, you know, back when we were all just friends. Do you have any idea how awkward and unneeded it makes me feel to see you guys just ignore me so you can make out?"

"Okay," Sam nodded. "We got it. We promise this time, we're done kissing."

"We're all yours for the rest of the night," Freddie agreed.

"Aw," Carly smiled. "You guys really are the best.

She un-paused the movie, and popped some more popcorn into her mouth.

Things were going great for almost the rest of the movie. The three teens laughed together and Carly was thrilled to realize that it _did _almost feel like old times. She _was_ happy that Sam and Freddie had begun dating; she knew they were perfect for each other, and she thought their relationship was adorable…most of the time. But there still were times when she felt like a third wheel.

"Oh man," Carly grinned, finishing up the last of her popcorn towards the end of the film. "I don't think I've ever laughed this hard in my life. I mean, a penguin, a caveman, _and _a pop icon? How do you even go wrong with-"

But suddenly, she began to choke as an unpopped popcorn kernel got caught in her throat. She began gagging, waiting for one of her friends to help her out, but after a few seconds, she realized that something was off, and she turned to see that in fact, Sam and Freddie had resumed their 'activity' again and were completely oblivious to her situation.

She continued to gag louder, hoping that they would hear her, but they seemed far too caught up to notice anything around them.

Carly quickly grabbed a couch cushion and hurled it at the couple, which luckily drew them back to reality.

"Hey!" Freddie said indignantly, massaging the side of his head where the pillow had hit him. "That hurt! Hey, Carls? What's wrong with you?"

"Are you choking or something?" Sam frowned.

Carly narrowed her eyes at the blonde.

"I'll take that as a yes," Sam said. She quickly got to her feet and began hitting Carly's back hard, and a few seconds later, the kernel dislodged itself from Carly's throat.

"I-I almost choked!" Carly gasped, glaring at Sam and Freddie. "Because you two were too busy smooching to notice your best friend dying!"

"We're sorry-" Freddie started.

"Oh, save it!" Carly snapped. "It's clear that you two would rather just smash your lips together than spend two hours watching a movie with me! I wanted one night with my best friends, who are always spending time with each other now, and I couldn't even get that!"

"Carly, we-" Sam began, but Carly had already begun stomping upstairs.

"Were are you going?" Freddie called after her.  
"To take a bubble bath!" Carly yelled. "Because that's what lonely girls do when they realize they're best friendless!"

"Man," Sam sighed as Carly disappeared. "She's really wazzed off."

"I can't say I blame her," Freddie mumbled. "I mean…we _have _been sort of treating her like a third wheel lately. It's not fair."

"I know," Sam nodded. "She _is _still our best friend…Even though we haven't been treating her like one."

"What are we going to do?" Freddie asked. "We have to make things right."

"Well," Sam said slowly. "I _may _have an idea."

….

The next day, Carly sat alone in the iCarly studio, working on some homework, still fuming about the previous night.

Just then, the studio door opened and Sam and Freddie sheepishly walked in.

"Hey," Sam said, giving her best friend a small smile.

"Hello," Carly said coldly. "Can I help you two?"

"Um, here," Freddie said, pulling a DVD out of his bag and handing it to her.

"What's this?" Carly frowned.

"The best looking romantic comedy we could find at the store," Sam replied.

"Romantic comedy?" Carly repeated.

"Your favorite," Freddie nodded. "We, um, we thought you might want to watch it."

"Oh, great, thanks," Carly said. "I'll go pop it in downstairs and you two can knock yourselves out up here!"

"No, we-we want to watch it together," Sam said.

"Oh, like how you agreed to watch a movie with me last night but wound up playing tonsil hockey?"

"We swear, we're not going to kiss each other at all during the movie," Freddie said.

"Yeah," Carly scoffed. "Like I haven't heard _that _before."

"No, it's going to be true this time," Sam said. "We made sure of that."

"How?" Carly asked suspiciously.

"Well, since my mom wasn't home," Freddie explained. "Sam and I just spent the morning at my place making out. For a _long _time. We broke our record."

"So?" Carly snapped. "What's that going to do? That just means your lips are all warmed up and ready!"

"Oh on the contraire, Carls," Sam smirked. "Our lips are worn out."

"Huh?"

"Don't you see how chapped our lips are now?" Freddie grinned, pointing at his own very red and chapped lips. "They hurt like crazy!"

"Yeah, I couldn't even finish the bag of chips I was eating!" Sam nodded. "I had to throw the bag away!"

"How long did you two _kiss_?" Carly asked, looking at their practically destroyed lips.

"You probably don't want to know," Sam said. "But the point is that there is no way we can kiss now for at least a day without feeling excruciating pain."

"Wow," Carly said softly. "That-That was really-"

"Wait, there's more," Freddie cut her off. "As sort of extra insurance…"

"I ate three pounds of garlic," Sam said proudly. "And Fredward at two containers of pickled sardines."

"_That's _what that smell was?" Carly gasped, covering her nose. "I thought Spencer was giving his garbage sculpture another go!"

"Nope, that's all us, kid," Sam said. "So between our chapped lips and terrible breath, there's no chance of us kissing each other while the three of us go down to enjoy this movie. Or well, enjoy it as much as I can for a romantic comedy."

"You guys," Carly said, her face breaking out into a smile as she threw her arms around them. "That is the sweetest thing you have ever done for me. Thank you. And-And I know I was a little…dramatic last night, but-"

"Hey, you were right, we were sort of…ignoring you," Freddie said. "And we're sorry. We really are. Sam and I are going to try and work on that."

"That means a lot," Carly said sincerely. "So come on! Let's go pop this sucker in! Oh, and um, no offense or anything, but I think I'm gonna sit on the chair down in the living room. I love you both and all, but your breath really stinks."


	373. Chapter 373

**AN-Hey, this is a sequel to chapter 351, where Ashton got her heart broken when her boyfriend cheated on her and Sam said she'd make a call to Uncle Carmine to take care of it.**

…

_Poker_

"-And he never even saw it coming," Sam's Uncle Carmine laughed as he sat on Sam and Freddie's couch.

"Ha! What a moron!" Sam grinned. "Who doesn't check their back seat for wasps nest, right baby?"

"Well…now I will," Freddie said, chuckling nervously.

"I'm so glad you made parole, Uncle Carmine," Sam said happily.

"So am I, my cell mate was starting to get under my skin," Carmine told her. "Guy was a computer hacker…I had to listen to him ramble on and on about computers day in and day out! Do you have any idea how annoying that is?"

"I have a pretty good idea," Sam said, looking over at Freddie.

"So where are the kids?" Carmine asked, clapping his hands together. "I want to see them!"

"Well, Jason's actually still down at Cal Tech," Sam said. "And Tyler won't be home until around dinner time because he has baseball practice right after school, but the twins should be here any minute…"

Sure enough, right on cue, Emma and Ashton walked into the house, along with Emma's boyfriend, Quincy.

"Whoa!" Ashton exclaimed, catching sight of Carmine. "Uncle Carmine!"

"No way!" Emma grinned as her and her sister ran over to their uncle and throwing their arms around him.

"There are my girls!" Carmine said, getting to his feet.

"So did you make parole?" Emma asked excitedly. "Do you have any cool prison stories for me? Did you bring brass knuckles?"

"They don't hug _me _when they come home from school," Freddie mumbled. "They don't even acknowledge me!"

"You're their dad; they see you every day," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "They see Uncle Carmine _maybe _twice a year."

"Wait, wait, wait," Carmine said, looking over at Quincy, who was standing nervously watching the scene. "Who's this guy?"

"Oh, this is my boyfriend, Quincy," Emma said.

"Yeah, you know that weird dude you met a few times, Gibby?" Sam nodded. "Well, that's one of his sons."

"Um, d-delightful to meet you, sir," Quincy squeaked, feeling very anxious, as he had heard several stories about this man from the twins. Freddie couldn't help but smile as he realized how much Quincy's scared expression matched the same one he had worn when he met Uncle Carmine for the first time so many years ago with Sam.

"Ah, the boyfriend," Carmine said, stepping towards Quincy, who gulped. "The BF…Tell me, boy, do you plan on _hurting _that sweet, innocent little girl over there?"

"Pfft, Emma sweet?" Ashton chuckled.

"No!" Quincy said at once. "No, I-I-"

"Because I can make people _disappear_," Carmine said in a scary whisper. "I can do make things happen that would make a pretty boy like you wet his pants. Like what I just got through doing to that other punk."

"What other punk?" Emma asked.

"Yeah," Ashton frowned. "What other-"

"Hey, Uncle Carmine? Didn't you say that you picked up some things for the girls?" Sam said quickly.

"Oh, right!" Carmine said. "They're out in the back of my truck. I bought you girls some real nice stuff with my poker winnings. Come and get them. You come too, pretty boy. I'm not through with you."

"Um…he's not gonna hurt Quincy is he?" Freddie asked slowly.

"Nah, he won't," Sam assured him. "He'll just scare him and tell him to treat Emma right."

"I did that already," Freddie pointed out. "I think I had Quincy pretty scared myself."

"Yeah, okay," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "But I think a guy who just did what he did to that Jessie kid for cheating on Ashton is a _little_ more intimidating than you."

"I will say, I enjoyed that," Freddie grinned. "Serves that little punk right, hurting Ashton like that. It made the whole 'putting a wasp nests in a guy's car' thing look tame."

"I know," Sam chuckled. "I wish I could see the look on that dumb kid's face…He made Ashton all depressed for a good week; he needed to suffer."

"Well I'd say my virus I sent him did a pretty good job of that," Freddie said proudly.

"Aw, baby," Sam smiled, leaning up to kiss him. "It's so cute when you think you're tough."

…..

"Your uncle's not really gonna stab me all over is he?" Quincy asked as he paced up and down in the twins' room later that night.

"Nah," Ashton said, looking up from her textbook. "My mom wouldn't let him do _that_. He might just mess up your face a little bit if you ever do something."

"But I'm not!" Quincy exclaimed. "I told him that a million times, and he still kept threatening me!"

"I know, it was really funny," Emma said, playing on her laptop.

"Well I'm glad you get your jollies from my misery!" Quincy snapped.

"Jollies?" Emma repeated.

"Dude, stop repeating everything you hear your dad say," Ashton said, turning back to her homework. "And do you know how to do the math homework? I got most of it, but this last problem sort of has me-"

"Whoa!" Emma said, looking at her laptop screen. "Come check out this video someone from school just posted online!"

"What video?" Quincy asked as him and Ashton went over and huddled around the laptop. "Kid Gets Attacked By Mimes?"

"Hey," Ashton frowned. "Is that kid getting attacked by the mimes…_Jessie_?"

"Your ex-boyfriend?" Quincy asked.

"No, Jessie the Hot Dog!" Emma said, rolling her eyes. "Yes her ex-boyfriend. Wow, this is _great_!"

The three teens watched the video, where Jessie was chased hopelessly by a group of mimes, all hurling tomatoes and sardines at him while Jessie screamed in terror. The best part was when one of the mimes finally caught him and pulled out a live ferret and put it in Jessie's pants.

"Okay, this is officially the best thing I've ever seen," Ashton said happily. "Look how freaked out he is! I've got to send this to Clarissa."

"What was a group of mimes doing in Seattle though?" Quincy asked.

"What? Mimes can't come see the Space Needle?" Emma shrugged.

"It is sort of weird," Ashton said. "Funny, yeah, but weird. I mean, why would the mimes just target Jessie and-no!"

"What?" Emma frowned.

"_That's _why Uncle Carmine was visiting us today!" Ashton said.

"_This _is what he does to people?" Quincy exclaimed. "I'd rather take the stabbing! This looks horrible!"

"Oh man up," Emma said. "Do you plan on cheating on me?"

"What? No!"

"Well then Uncle Carmine won't bother you," Emma said. "So stop freaking out! And Ash, you don't know for sure he did this. It would be _awesome _if he did, but-"

"I'm gonna go ask mom," Ashton said slowly.

"Fine," Emma said. "And we'll stay here and watch this video five million more times."

"You're just gonna make out," Ashton said, rolling her eyes.

"Yeah, probably," Emma shrugged. "So get out."

Ashton hurried downstairs, where her mom was busy cooking meatloaf for dinner.

"Hey mom," Ashton said. "Um, where's Uncle Carmine? Isn't he staying for dinner?"

"Yeah, but he decided to go with your dad to pick Tyler up from practice," Sam replied.

"Oh, I bet dad was happy about that…"

"Nah, he was completely miserable," Sam smirked. "So what's up kid?"

"Um, well, Emma just found this video online," Ashton started. "Of-Of Jessie sort of getting attacked by mimes…"

"Uh-huh," Sam said, avoiding her daughter's gaze as she slid the meatloaf in the oven.

"Yeah, and-and I was just sort of wondering…did-did Uncle Carmine have anything to do with it?" Ashton asked.

Sam sighed. "Okay, yes. Your Uncle Carmine found out about what happened between you and Jessie, and he decided he wanted to teach Jessie a lesson himself. So he arranged for some of his old prison buddies to dress up like mimes and freak him out a little…And stuff a ferret down his pants."

"Why'd he do that?" Ashton asked.

"Because, sweetie, he loves you," Sam said. "He didn't like thinking of how hurt you were when Jessie…you know. He's protective of his family."

"He sure has Quincy freaked out," Ashton grinned. "But he'll never hurt Emma, so he won't have to worry…And I guess the whole mime thing was sort of nice, well, _really _nice. Not for Jessie, but you know what I mean."

"I know," Sam chuckled. "And you know, your _dad_ may not be as…resourceful as Uncle Carmine, but he _did _send Jessie a pretty nasty virus a few days ago."

"That was _him_?" Ashton laughed. "He was complaining about that in school the other day! Apparently he lost his entire hard drive with all his stupid games and all his papers for school on it! He was so angry!"

"Well that was the work of you dad," Sam said.

"Wow, who knew dad would do something like that," Ashton said.

"You'd be surprised what he'd do for you guys," Sam smiled. "He loves you all more than anything."


	374. Chapter 374

_Chips_

"So has your mom calmed down yet about this whole thing?" Carly asked Freddie.

"No, she's still dead set against me moving all the way to Massachusetts," Freddie sighed. "This morning I caught her trying to throw one of my suitcases out the window."

"Guppy did that to me one time because he was jealous that our dad was taking me on a fishing trip and not him," Gibby said. "I just got the last of my underwear out of the tree…"

"Well, I know your mom's not exactly the most sane person at any time," Spencer said. "But you've got to admit, Massachusetts _is _pretty far from Seattle."

"I know," Freddie nodded. "But it's _MIT_!"

"Yeah, and we're all really proud that you got in there," Carly smiled. "But you know, if you want to change your mind right now at the last minute and come to Washington State with Sam, Gibby and me…"

"Believe me, that's very tempting," Freddie grinned.

"Nah," Carly said. "I was just kidding. Going to MIT has been your dream pretty much your whole life, and you deserve to go."

Suddenly Gibby threw his arms around Freddie. "Oh man…here comes the waterworks," he sniffed.

"Gib, just because I'm leaving you guys doesn't mean we're not going to stay buds," Freddie assured him. "I promise, I'll call you and Carly and Spencer and Sam all the time."

"Hey, where _is _Sam?" Spencer asked, starting to clean up some of the scattered paper plates and plastic cups that littered the apartment. "She didn't come to Freddie's going away party, did she?"

"No, I have no idea where she is," Carly frowned. "She knew the party was starting around eight, and she was actually supposed to come by earlier and-"

"Yo yo," Sam said, letting herself into the apartment. She looked around. "So…some party."

"You missed the party!" Carly exclaimed. "Everyone left about an hour ago."

"Oh, well, I fell asleep," Sam shrugged. She turned to Freddie. "So, Fredwash, you excited to finally get away from your mentally unstable mother?"

"Um, yeah, a little," Freddie nodded. "I mean I'll miss her, but-"

"Hey, while you're in Massachusetts you should check out the Worlds Longest Shoelace," Sam cut him off. "Man, that thing's supposed to be over four hundred yards!"

"I'll be sure to check it out," Freddie said.

"Who would wear a four hundred yard shoelace?" Gibby asked.

"You don't _wear _it, Gibwad," Sam snapped. "You look at it and _admire_ it."

"Um, so-so Freddie," Carly said. "What time are you supposed to be at the airport tonight?"

"Well my plane leave at two in the morning, so I should probably start leaving for the airport in a few minutes," Freddie said slowly.

"Oh!" Carly mumbled, giving Freddie a big hug. "I'm going to miss you so much. It's going to be weird not having iCarly's technical producer across the hall telling me stories about his batty mom and the latest Pear Company news that I really don't care about."

"I'll miss you too, Carls," Freddie said, hugging her back.

"Okay, you've had your turn!" Gibby exclaimed, shoving Carly out of the way so he could hug Freddie again. "Oh, I promised myself I'd be strong!"

"Take care of yourself, kid," Spencer said, giving Freddie a quick hug too. "And if you decide you want to spruce up your dorm room with something like, oh, I dunno, a wacky sculpture-"

"I'll know who to call," Freddie finished.

And then everyone turned to Sam, who was sitting on the Shay's couch, looking down at her lap at a bowl of chips.

"Well, um," Sam said awkwardly, clearing her throat. "Have-Have a good fight." She made no effort to get up and hug him as the others did.

"Thanks," Freddie said, giving her a small smile.  
"Try not to choke on the airline peanuts," Sam continued. "And, um, don't geek up MIT too much…"

"I'll try," Freddie chuckled.

"Yeah, well," Sam mumbled. "Bye then, I guess."

Carly looked up at Freddie and she could see hurt in his eyes, but he pulled on a fake grin.

"Bye," he echoed. He turned back to the others. "Well, I guess I should go get my mom so I can try and get her to stop sobbing hysterically for twenty minutes to drive me to the airport."

"We'll come with you," Carly said quickly. "We-We'll walk you down."

"Okay," Freddie nodded. "I-I'd like that."

Carly looked back at Sam as her and the others began to head out the door and across the hall.

"Sam?" she asked softly. "Are you coming?"

"Nah, Mama's stomach's grumbling and these chips have my name on them," Sam said simply.

Carly opened her mouth to argue and insist that Sam come with them, but then realized that her best friend was probably one of the most stubborn girls in Seattle, and if she didn't want to do something, it was no use trying to force her. So she instead closed the door behind her, leaving Sam alone in the apartment.

Once she was sure the others were gone, Sam pushed away the chips. She didn't feel like eating at all; her stomach felt so twisted that she almost wondered if she'd ever be able to eat again.

So this was it. Freddie was leaving her. In a couple hours he would be boarding his plane that would take him across the country to his fancy college where he'd start a new life. He'd meet new friends and maybe even find himself a new girlfriend…

Sam hugged her knees, feeling as if she had just been slapped in the face and punched in the gut. She didn't think it would hurt this much…She knew seeing Freddie leave would be painful. That's why she made sure not to attend Carly's little going away party for him. It would just be rubbing it in her face that soon he'd be gone.

Sam knew the others were going to miss Freddie a lot, but she knew none of them could understand what she was feeling now. They were all losing a friend, but she…she was losing the boy she loved…the boy who she loved but who didn't know it because she was too scared to tell him.

They had broken up over a year ago, and Sam had regretted it shortly after. But no one could know that. No, all they could know was that tough-girl Sam Puckett had broken the stupid nub's heart and felt nothing but relief from the ended relationship. They couldn't know that she still stayed up some nights re-reading the old love emails he had sent her or would sometimes walk slightly behind him just so she could have an excuse to stare at him without anyone realizing.

_Maybe this is a good thing_, Sam thought to herself. _Maybe with him so far away my feelings for him will start to go away and I can stop feeling so sucky…_

But as she felt a few tears escape her eyes and roll down her cheeks, she knew in her heart that that was far from true.

She would always be in love with Freddie Benson.

…..

"So how's the campus?" Carly asked about a week later during a web chat with Freddie.

"It's awesome, Carls," Freddie told her. "It's a little empty, though, since it's summer, but I'm sure once the fall semester starts up, it will be more busy."

"Well how are your classes?" Carly questioned.

"Are they hard?" Gibby asked.  
"Gibby!" Carly exclaimed. "He's studying computer programing at MIT! Of course his classes are hard!"

"Well _sorry_," Gibby frowned. "Maybe I was just trying to make conversation."

"Yeah, the classes are real hard," Freddie chuckled. "They're a lot of work, but they're really interesting."

"Well I'm glad you like them," Carly smiled. "Have you met any new friends yet though?"

"A few," Freddie shrugged. "My roommate seems nice, but I haven't really gotten a chance to talk to him too much because I think he's still a little freaked out about the safety drills my mom made him do with me when I moved in…But I joined a study group, and the kids there seem pretty nice."

"Good, but don't you go starting up anymore hit web shows with any of them," Carly said jokingly.

"Don't worry," Freddie assured her. "My heart belongs with iCarly. Hey, you guys? Is-Is Sam there?"

"Oh, um, no," Carly said slowly. "She-She isn't. I told her that we were going to web chat with you today, but she never responded to my text…I'm sorry, Freddie."

"Hey, it's cool," Freddie said quickly, trying to mask his disappointment. "Um, but, I-I need to start reading class now. I'll talk to you later."

"Okay, bye," Carly said.

"Wait!" Gibby exclaimed. "How's the soap situation at MIT?"

"The soap?" Freddie repeated.  
"Yeah, is it bar? Liquid? Foam?" Gibby asked. "Or do they have those little flake things?"

"Why do you care about MIT's soap?" Carly cried, exasperated.

"Because," Gibby said. "Maybe I'll transfer there one day, and I'd like to know what kind of soap I have waiting for me there."

"Yeah, like you're getting into MIT," Carly chuckled, rolling her eyes.

"I've really got to start reading," Freddie said. "But I'll look into the soap for you Gib."

"See, _that's _supportive," Gibby said to Carly.

"Have fun with your reading," Carly sighed. She made to cancel out of the chat window, but instead of clicking the exit button, she accidently hit the minimize button without realizing it, so that when she got up and stepped away from her computer, the webcam was still blinking and on…

"Hey, what do you mean I couldn't get into MIT?" Gibby asked, getting to his feet as well.

"Oh," Carly said, sitting down on her bed. "Um, just-just that Massachusetts has a really-um-they have a no rubber head policy. Yeah, so-so if you went there, you couldn't bring your Gibby head."  
"What?" Gibby exclaimed. "Well, I'm never going _there_! Hey, did Spencer restock on the pudding?"

"Yeah, there should be some more in there," Carly nodded.

"Gibby!" Gibby cheered happily, hurrying out of the room.

Carly sighed as she laid down on her bed, picking up her Pearpad.

She was starting to get a little worried about Sam. She hadn't seen her since the night Freddie left, and even then she had disappeared by the time she had come back up from walking Freddie down. Except for a few short texts here and there, it literally seemed like Sam had gone into exile.

"Hey," Sam herself said suddenly, bursting into Carly's room. "You up for some shopping, Carlotta? My mom's dating a rich banker this week and I have his credit cards, so we can have some real fun."

"Um, maybe later," Carly said. "You-You know you just missed Freddie. We were web chatting with him."

"Oh, too bad," Sam shrugged. "Anyway, we should hit Build-A-Bra because I got barbecue sauce all over my fancy glow-in-the-dark bra, and-"

"Sam, what's going on?" Carly cut her off.

"What do you mean?" Sam frowned. "You know I always eat rib without a shirt and-"

"No, not with that!" Carly said. "I mean…with Freddie."

"What about Freddie?" Sam asked.

"Well, have-have you talked to him at all since he left for MIT?" Carly questioned. "Have you called him or texted or emailed or _anything_?"

"I retweeted something of his the other night," Sam said. "Why? What's the big deal?"

"It's just, well, I-I know you and Freddie never really had a traditional friendship," Carly began. "But I just…I just thought you were still really close. But you barely even said goodbye to him the night he left and you haven't even really contacted him at college even though he's been there for a week. Do you not miss him?"

"I-I do," Sam mumbled.

"Well you're not showing it," Carly said. "I mean, Freddie's been our friend for years, and now we're probably not going to see him in person until we're all back here for Thanksgiving or Christmas in a few months. I just don't get how you can be so…blah, about him leaving and-"

"Well I didn't _want _him to leave!" Sam exclaimed. "I didn't want him to move across the country; I wanted him to go to Washington State with us, or even University of Washington or _somewhere _that wasn't a gazillion miles away! But, well, the-the nub's been wanting to go to MIT since before he could talk…"

"Oh, Sam, I knew you missed him," Carly smiled. "I knew you had a heart…but why didn't you say anything?"

"I'm not good with goodbyes, okay?" Sam snapped.

"But still, you have Gibby and Spencer and me," Carly told her. "We all miss Freddie just as much as you. We know how you're-"

"No you don't," Sam mumbled.

"Huh?" Carly frowned.

"You three don't know how I'm feeling at all!" Sam said, anger suddenly flooding her voice.  
"What do you mean? Of course we do!" Carly said. "Freddie was our friend too, who we loved, and not getting to have him around all the time's going to be hard on all of us-"

"Well I'm _in _love with him, okay!" Sam said loudly.

Carly blinked, taken aback. "W-What?" she stammered. "You-You still…You're-"

"Yes," Sam moaned, falling down onto the couch, across from Carly's still open laptop. "I'm still in love with him. That's-that's why I didn't want to say goodbye. Because if I did, then-then I probably would've lost it."

"But Sam," Carly said gently, sitting down next to her. "Why didn't you ever _tell _Freddie that? He might've-"

"It wouldn't have made any difference," Sam said heavily. "He wouldn't have stayed."

"But you could've maybe done something long distance," Carly reasoned. "Or-Or who knows, maybe Freddie_ would've _stayed for you-"

"No, he wouldn't have," Sam said firmly. "And long distance relationships only work in the movies…And anyway, for him to have even agreed to a long distance relationship, he'd-he'd have had to felt the same way about me, which, let's face it, is about as likely as _me_ getting into MIT."

"Sam, I-I know you're not the type of girl to put your feelings out there," Carly said softly. "But-But don't you _see_, you have to sometimes! If you're in love with Freddie, you need to tell him."

"Why?" Sam said harshly. "So I can just get rejected and have _closure_?"

"Why do you keep thinking that Freddie would reject you?" Carly inquired. "You guys _did _date before."

"Yeah, I know, and we broke up!" Sam snapped. "We broke up because we were too different and he couldn't deal with my _abnormalness_! So what makes you think that it would work out a second time? I'm not like you, Carly. I can't just bat my eyelashes and curl my hair and flirt my butt off and have guys swarm me! He wouldn't want to get back together with me because I'm still too…me! This isn't some stupid romance movie where I could've told him I was in love with him right before he got on that plane and have him run back to me and spin me in his arms as he kissed me stupid and told me he loved me back and was going to stay with me! You want to know what would've happened? I'd tell him, he'd look at me like I was an _idiot_ and then mumble that he didn't think it would work out between us again, got on the plane, flown to Massachusetts and then whenever we did see each other again, he'd look at me like I was some _freak_!"

"Well then what are you going to do if you don't tell him, huh?" Carly demanded. "Just sit here in Washington and let your feelings drive you crazy?"

"I can fall out of love with him," Sam said, not meeting her best friend's gaze. "Just-Just give it some time and-"

"Sam," Carly said gently, putting her arms around her. "You know that's not true."

Sam didn't respond. She didn't think she could.

…..

Freddie walked back into his dorm room. He had decided to take a quick shower after talking to Carly and Gibby on the webcam to try and clear his mind before he sat down to do his work.

He hadn't heard from Sam since he had gotten to MIT. He felt hurt. Weren't him and Sam friends? Yeah, they had dated and broken up, but that didn't mean they didn't still care about each other, did it? He still _loved _her. He had meant it when he said it, did she only say it back to try and spare him the humiliation. Part of him wanted to call her; to demand to know why she was being so…cold, towards him.

But this was Sam Puckett he was talking about, did he _really _expect her to give him tons of hugs and gush about how much she was going to miss him like Carly?

Still, though, he thought their relationship was strong enough to at least warrant _one _hug and a quick 'I'll miss you'.

Ever since he had gotten here, he had been thinking of that blonde-headed demon, and even though he was upset at her less-than-warm goodbye, he _missed her_. A lot. At times it felt as though he missed her the most; it was strange not having someone snickering at how he color coded his schedule with highlighters or looking over and not seeing her fast asleep in her desk during class, with her blonde curls falling over her face and her cute nose scrunching up as she dreamed of bacon and ribs…

Just as he was picturing that image, though, he realized he heard voices. He looked back over at his desk and saw that his webcam was still on, and there on the screen was Sam and Carly.

_Did Carly forget to turn off the webcam_? Freddie frowned. But seeing Sam again, even if it was only through a tiny computer screen, made Freddie's feel a familiar warmth.

Neither girl seemed to realize that Freddie could see them and hear them. It seemed as if they were fighting…Freddie sat down at his desk, torn between the moral dilemma of letting Carly know she had left the webcam on, or taking this chance to see what they were fighting about.

And then Freddie heard his name, and he knew there was no chance of him missing this opportunity.

"What do you mean? Of course we do!" he heard Carly say. "Freddie was our friend too, who we loved, and not getting to have him around all the time's going to be hard on all of us-"

"Well I'm _in _love with him, okay!" Sam said loudly.

Freddie's eyes widened. Had he heard that right? Was that true?

"I'm still in love with him. That's-that's why I didn't want to say goodbye. Because if I did, then-then I probably would've lost it," he heard Sam mumbled as he watched her sit down on the couch in Carly's room, giving him a perfect view of the sincerity of her words reflecting in her blue eyes.

Sam loved him? She was _in _love with him?

_Oh my God_, Freddie thought to himself. _She-But she-she still loves me! But-Why-why didn't she tell me sooner? _

Freddie tried to wrap his head around this new information. So that's why Sam had been so distant with him. Not because she was glad he was gone and wanted him out of her life, but because she _loved _him and was crushed to see him leave.

How could he have missed this? But then he remembered that he didn't pick up on Sam's feelings the first time either. The girl truly was a master at hiding her emotions.

But what did he do now? He of course wanted to call Sam and discuss this, but then he remembered that he wasn't supposed to be hearing any of this. He couldn't just ignore this though! Sam Puckett was still in love with him.

And then the big question came into his head. Was he still in love with her?

Truthfully, he had given their relationship thoughts back home Would they ever get back together? Did she miss him as much as he missed her? But he was never one to take a risk, which may have been why he had avoided asking Sam about this himself when he was still in Seattle.

_Sam_, Freddie thought, churning his teeth in confusion. _Why couldn't you just talk to me? Because then…then we could've been-_

"Well then what are you going to do if you don't tell him, huh?" Carly's voice said forcefully, bringing him out of his thoughts. "Just sit here in Washington and let your feelings drive you crazy?"

"I can fall out of love with him," Sam said, and Freddie's heart skipped a beat. "Just-Just give it some time and-"

"Sam," Carly said, putting her arms around her. "You know that's not true."

Freddie quickly turned his webcam off, because he didn't think he could take any more of this. He was so confused and his heart was racing and his palms were sweating.

"Sam," he whispered to his empty room. "I-I'm still in love with you too."

But he was in Massachusetts, and she was in Seattle. He was not supposed to know any of what he had just heard, and even if he did decide to bring this up to Sam, he knew for a fact that her walls would be up in a second and she'd deny everything.

So what did he do? He went to his bed and collapsed into it. What _could _he do? He may be at a top notch school, but he still felt totally clueless.


	375. Chapter 375

_Wool_

"Hey," Carly said to Spencer as her, Sam and Freddie walked into the Shay's apartment after school.

"Hey," Spencer said brightly, looking up from the game of Pac-Rat he was playing on his Pearpad. "Guess who's only ten thousand points away from beating his high score!"

"This is all you did today, isn't it?" Sam frowned.

"No! I got the mail!" Spencer defended, nodding over at the pile of envelopes on the coffee table. "So how was school today you little teeny boppers?"

"Well, you'll be an uncle soon," Carly said simply, heading into the kitchen for a snack.

"What?" Spencer exclaimed, dropping his Pearpad as he jumped to his feet. "You-No! You're not-What? Okay, someone start talking fast!"

"In a week, right?" Freddie said.

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "Which is sort of unlucky, because I have a trig test at the end of next week that I'll need to be studying for, but with the baby-"

"What is going on?" Spencer demanded loudly. "Huh? I need an explanation _now _while I still have feeling in my legs!"

"Calm down, we're talking about _robotic _babies," Sam told him.

"Yeah, for health class," Carly explained. "Everyone gets partnered up to raise an imaginary baby together for a week."

"Oh," Spencer said, falling back down onto the couch, relieved. "Hey, you know, I had to do that project too in high school. Except then we used potatoes instead of robot babies."

"Because robots didn't exist back in the stone age?" Sam smirked.

"Did she just call me old?" Spencer gasped.

"So how'd you do with your potato baby?" Freddie asked.

"Oh, well, I got a D- because I accidently might've cooked him into tater tots," Spencer replied sheepishly.

"Nice," Sam grinned.

"Well these babies are going to be a lot harder to take care of than a potato," Carly said. "They're programed to be almost exactly like real babies. They cry, you have to change them and feed them…it's supposed to show us how hard it is to take care of kids."

"I still stay this is a stupid project," Sam mumbled. "And to make it all even worse, I got stuck with a stupid partner…"

"Who's your partner?" Spencer asked.

"Me," Freddie sighed, rolling his eyes.

"Really?" Spencer said. "So you two have to take care of an imaginary baby for a week? Like, you know, parents?"

"Yup," Freddie said glumly.

"Clearly it's the universe's way of punishing me for eating that burger in front of those baby cows at the petting zoo," Sam said.

"Oh come on," Carly said. "You guys don't have it bad at all. Me on the other hand…"

"Who's _your _partner?" Spencer asked.

"Gibby," Carly muttered.

"Ha!" Spencer laughed.

"It's not funny!" Carly snapped. "I was trying to catch the eye of the cute boy a few desks down from me, but I was completely side swept by stupid Olivia Gonzales who flipped her stupid perfect hair and wooed him in! So Mr. Copland put me with Gibby instead."

"At least you know Gibby will probably at least do _some _work!" Freddie pointed out. He turned to Sam. "I'm serious, Sam. You better pull your weight with this project. I'm not going to be the one who's stuck taking care of this baby all the time."

"Oh boo-hoo," Sam said. "Like you have anything better to do."

"I happen to have plenty of things I need to do!" Freddie retorted. "I have AV club, math club, young businessmen's club, _homework_, something you've never done in your life-"

"Well maybe I will be the one taking care of the stupid robot kid the whole time," Sam said, cracking her knuckles. "Because _you're _about to be on a very painful trip to the hospital!"

"Yeah, violence is always the answer…that's a great lesson to be teaching the kid!" Freddie snapped.

"It's better than _you _nerding him up!"

"Well excuse me for being an intellectual!"

"Don't you mean intedorkual?"

"Well, at least I've got plenty of experience dealing with _children_," Carly said, watching her two best friends fight. She took a deep breath. "You guys? You guys, will you please just-No, Sam! Don't put that down his pants!"

….

"So for the next week," the teens health teacher, Mr. Copland, said as he walked around the classroom with a giant box of robotic babies. "You and your partner are responsible for your fake child. You are to treat it as if it was a real baby!"

"But it's not," Sam pointed out.

"No sass, Puckett, or you and Benson will be receiving an automatic F!" the teacher said harshly.

"Sam, please!" Freddie hissed.

"Aw, are you afraid of a little F?" Sam grinned.  
"I will pay you ten bucks to stop talking!" Freddie begged.

"Twenty or I'll scream."

"Fine!" He fished out his wallet and crammed a twenty dollar bill into her hand.

"Oh man, isn't this exciting?" Gibby said, shaking Carly's shoulder. "We're getting our first ever box baby! This is just as exciting as when I got my fist Lettuce Field doll when I was a kid…"

"Why were you playing with dolls?" Carly asked slowly.

"Wow, really Carls?" Gibby frowned. "I thought you were a little more progressive than that. Try not to pass on your closed mind to our box baby."

"You can't pass anything on to a robotic baby," Carly said, exasperated as Mr. Copland approached their desks. "It's not real!"

"Congratulations," Mr. Copland said dryly, dropping one of the robotic babies onto Carly's lap. "It's a girl."

"A girl?" Carly repeated, perking up as she held the doll in her arms. "Aw! She's so tiny and cute!"

"Hey, wouldn't it be kind of cool to get a girl too?" Freddie said. "Then she could go on play dates with Carls and Gib's baby, and-"

"For the millionth time, they're _robot_ babies!" Sam moaned. "They can't have play dates! All they can do is cry at random times and _somehow_ pee in a diaper; it can't even understand English! So don't try and be all baby-crazy with this thing when-"

"Alright, Puckett, Benson," Mr. Copland said, finally stopping off at their desks. He pulled out the last robotic baby from the box and thrust it at Sam. "You get a boy."

"Whoa, this thing is…is kind of…real-looking," Sam frowned, examining the baby. "He almost looks…cute."

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "I mean, I know he _is _a robot and all, but I wonder if this is what it feels like when you have a _real _baby…seeing him for the first time. It must be really magical and-"

Just then a loud cry emitted from the baby. Sam quickly tossed him to Freddie, who, luckily, caught him just in time. "Your turn!" she said.

…..

"Oh my God," Carly moaned, gently bouncing her robotic baby on her shoulder. "Please stop crying little Gwendela. You've been screaming into my ear ever since I brought you home from school yesterday and I think I'm about to go deaf."

"Hey, can you control that baby?" Spencer yawned, coming out of his room. "It's eleven thirty on a Saturday; people are trying to sleep."

Carly glared at her brother. "Do you think I _enjoy _hearing this thing cry? I swear, it must have faulty wiring or something because there is no way it should be this loud."

"Well where's Gibby?"

"I don't know!" she exclaimed. "He _was _supposed to have Gwendela spend the night with him yesterday, but his cat almost clawed off her head, so now I'm stuck with it!"

"Gwendela?" Spencer chuckled.

"It's a classy name!" Carly snapped.

"Alright, jeesh," Spencer conceded. "Man, you're in a mood."

"Sorry," Carly sighed. "I'm just so tired, and I can't figure out how to get her to stop crying and I haven't even gotten a chance to take a shower so my hairs all greasy and I can already feel a stress pimple forming on my chin, and-"

"Aw, there, there," Spencer said, awkwardly patting his sister on her back. "If it makes you feel any better, when I was taking care of my potato, I was so stressed I missed three straight episodes of Adolescent Power Penguins."

Just then the apartment door opened and Sam and Freddie walked in with their own robotic baby.

"Wow, Carls, you look terrible," Sam commented.

"Thanks!" Carly said miserably. "Wait, how come your baby isn't screaming?"

"Because we just fed and changed him before we came over," Freddie said. "Oh, and now we need to burp him…"

"On it," Sam said, placing the baby over her shoulder and gently patting its back.

Carly frowned. "Um…what?"

"What?" Freddie asked.

"Nothing," Carly said quickly. "It's just I-I sort of figured at this point you two would be killing each other or something over this project."

"It's actually not as bad as I thought," Sam admitted.

"Didn't you have to wake up a million times to take care of the baby?" Carly asked.

"Only twice," Sam replied. "See, since my mom's off in Vegas and Fredwad's mom's taking care of her sister's growth or something, he just crashed downstairs on my couch last night, so he woke up half the time, and I handled the other half."

"It was actually a very efficient system," Freddie added.

"Well that's fantastic," Carly mumbled bitterly. "But do you guys have any idea what I should do with this screaming kid here? I changed her, I fed her-"

"You're holding her wrong," Sam said, handing her own baby back to Freddie and heading into the kitchen. "You're supposed to hold him like Fredbutt's doing right now."

"I-oh," Carly said, quickly repositioning her baby, and the crying ceased almost immediately. "How'd you guys know to do that?"

"We just figured it out," Sam shrugged.

"Well, at least Gwendela finally stopped crying," Carly sighed.

"Gwendela?" Freddie repeated, trying hard not laugh.

"Well what's your kid named?" Carly demanded.

"Nothing yet," Sam said.

"You guys haven't named your baby yet?" Carly said. "You need to do that by Monday, you know. Why don't you try to figure it out now?"

"Yeah, that's actually not a bad idea," Freddie agreed. "I'm getting sort of sick of just calling the baby 'him'."

"Yeah, I've got nothing to do now," Sam said, stuffing her sandwich she just made into her mouth.

"You should try ," Carly suggested. "That's where Gibby and I found Gwendela's name. Of course, Gibby _did _want to name her Girlby…"

"Alright, let's do this," Sam said, taking the baby back from Freddie and setting him on her lap. Just then a loud cry emitted from Gwendela.

"Again?" Carly exclaimed. "Now what?"

She grabbed one of the fake bottles their teacher had given them and placed it in the baby's mouth.

"Alright, you ready to get named?" Sam asked her and Freddie's baby.

"What happened to 'it's a robot baby, it doesn't understand English'?" Freddie asked, amused.

"Oh shut up-I mean, be quiet…please," Sam said.

Carly gave her a strange look.

"Well you can't say 'shut up' in front of a baby!" Sam whispered, and Carly couldn't help but laugh when Sam covered the baby's plastic ears as she replied.

"Here we go," Freddie said, typing away on the computer on the kitchen counter. "Here's a list of boy names…What do you think of…Kyle?"

"Eh, no," Sam said. "He doesn't look like a Kyle."

"Yeah, you're right," Freddie agreed, looking down at the baby. "How about…Peter?"

"Nah, kids will call him Peter Pan when he gets older," Sam said.

"Oh, smart, we wouldn't want that," Freddie nodded. "That could hurt his self-esteem."

"Um, you-you guys know that this baby isn't exactly going to get older, right?" Carly pointed out, but her two best friends couldn't seem to hear her.

"Hey, I like Liam," Sam said, looking at the screen.

"I don't know," Freddie said thoughtfully. "I sort of like Henry."

"No, I knew a Henry in Juvie," Sam said. "He almost bit though the bars on his cell."

"Mark then?" Freddie suggested.

"Too common," Sam said. "He's my kid; he needs a spunky name."

"Well he's my kid too," Freddie pointed out. "He needs a sort of…calm name too."

"Well read out more names then," Sam sighed. "And hurry, because we're taking him to the park soon, remember?"

"Oh, right," Freddie said. "Okay, Daniel, Cameron, Jason, Frank, Kurt, William, Rider, Lionel, Brent, Tyler, Raymond, Tucker, Victor, Mathew-"

"Mathew?" Sam repeated.

"You like that one?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah," Sam smiled. "Do you?"

"It's a pretty great name," Freddie agreed. He picked up the baby from Sam's lap. "Do you want to be named Mathew little guy?"

"Of course he does, he's totally a Mathew!" Sam chuckled. "So do you want to go to the park now, Mathew? Oh, Fredward! We should take him to the lake to watch the ducks!"

"Yeah, let's just go back to my place really quick and get him a scarf or wool hat something," Freddie said. "It's a little nippy outside."

"Oh, true, he doesn't need to be catching a cold," Sam nodded.

"Yes…because that's possible," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"We'll see you guys later," Freddie said as him and Sam headed out of the apartment.

"Okay…bye," Carly said. Once they left, she turned to Spencer, who was sitting on the couch. "Alright, you saw that, right?"

"Um, how they're totally in sync as fake parents?" Spencer said. "Yeah, that was pretty obvious. Well, maybe not to them…"

"I mean, if I didn't know any better, I'd think they were actually taking care of their own, real child," Carly said. "This is just so…weird. I've never seen Sam this into a school project. Plus she's horrible at taking care of other things! Don't you remember her hamster-"

"Ah! No!" Spencer cried. "My heart still breaks when I hear that story!"

"To think," Carly sighed, sitting down next to Spencer. "Yesterday they were at each others throats. Give them a baby and suddenly they're the happiest people in the world."

"I remember how happy my potato made me," Spencer said happily.

"And then you ate him," Carly chuckled.

"Hey, he tasted good!" Spencer defended.

Suddenly, Gwendela began to cry again.

"Alright, that's it!" Carly snapped, getting to her feet. "I'm dropping this thing off at Gibby's. I'll bring his stupid cat back here if I have to!"

…

At last, the week was over, and the next day, the teens would be handing back in their robotic babies.

"Thank God this week is done," Carly said, rocking little Gwendela in her arms.

"Aw, you didn't have fun taking care of the baby?" Spencer asked.

"Well, I mean, it was sort of nice…the few times she stopped crying," Carly said. "But there's no way I'm ready for a real baby now. Not at all."

"Huh, I like this project," Spencer said approvingly.

"Yeah, well, Sam and Freddie over there are messes," Carly said softly, nodding over to her two best friends who were sitting on the couch, looking through pictures of them and Mathew throughout the week on Freddie's phone.

"Oh, and here's when we took him to the Groovy Smoothie and got him smashed sweet potato," Freddie said, scrolling though his phone.

"He really liked that," Sam said sadly. "Hey, there's when we took him on the carousel in the mall!"

"He enjoyed himself, didn't he," Freddie sighed. "Man, I'm going miss having little Mathew around."

"Yeah," Sam mumbled. "Hey! I got it! Tomorrow in class, I'll steal Mr. Copland's glasses so when he comes to collect Mathew, he won't notice when we _actually _hand back in a loaf of bread!"

"Sam, it-it's time to let him go," Freddie said gently, patting her shoulder.

"But we've had so little time together!" Sam pointed out.

"Well, we'll always have the memories," Freddie said as he continued to flip through the pictures.

"Unbelievable," Carly said, shaking her head. "Do they honestly not hear themselves?"

"This is so bizarre," Spencer agreed. "I've never seen the two of them like this. They weren't even this nice to each other when they were dating!"

"And you know the second that baby goes back, they'll be back to their usual selves," Carly said.

"What are you two going on about over there?" Sam asked.

"Oh, just commenting on what cute little parents you two have been this past week," Carly chuckled.

"What do you mean?" Freddie frowned.

"Come on, you guys have been acting like-like an actual family," Spencer said.

"We have not!" Sam defended.

"Yeah, in case you forgot, Carly, this is what we were supposed to be doing, for a _grade_," Freddie said.

"So you guys went on that nice little picnic with your robot baby just for an A?" Carly asked, amused.

"He has a _name_!" Sam snapped.

"Yeah, we don't call Gwendela a robot!" Freddie agreed.

"Not helping your argument," Carly grinned.


	376. Chapter 376

**AN-So back in the chapter where Freddie died, (ch355) Sam put a love letter she wrote but never gave him on his grave. I got a request to make her give him that letter earlier. I thought the oneshot actually worked better with just another love letter, though, but I hope you still enjoy it!**

…

_Stars_

"Well, baby, we made it," Freddie smiled, putting his arm around his girlfriend. "One year together."

"Who would've thought," Sam grinned, resting her head on his shoulder.

"Everyone probably thought we would've murdered each by now," Freddie said.

"Yeah, well, we've had a few close calls," Sam chuckled.

"But we always manage to work things out," Freddie said.

The couple was sitting out on Freddie's fire escape, looking up at the stars. They had just gotten back from their special date, and since his mother wasn't home, Freddie was taking advantage to the opportunity to keep Sam around as long as he could.

"Would you have ever imagined having a one-year anniversary with me five years ago?" Sam asked softly.

"Well would you have imagined having one with _me_?" Freddie pointed out.

Sam gave him a small smile. "Nah…I guess if someone told me that I'd fall madly in love with your nubby self, I would've punched them silly."

"And I probably would've passed out if someone told me that I'd fall madly in love with a certain blonde-headed demon," Freddie said. He placed a gentle kiss on Sam's lips. "But I'm sure glad I did."

Sam squeezed his hand. "Thanks for tonight, by the way, baby. It was great. Good food, fancy show…"  
"Anything for you," Freddie said. "Oh, and I have one more thing for you."

"What?" Sam asked as Freddie dug into his pocket. He pulled out a small box and opened it up to reveal a beautiful silver necklace with a tiny purple heart.

"Whoa," Sam said softly, staring at the jewelry. "Freddie, you-you didn't have to get me that. It probably cost you a fortune. And-And you just spent all that money on the dinner and tickets for the show-"

"Sam, don't worry about that," Freddie said, stringing the necklace around her neck.

"But-But I didn't get you anything," Sam whispered, playing with the tiny charm in her fingers.

"Sam, you've given me enough tonight just by being with me," Freddie said, wrapping both arms around her.

Sam laughed. "You don't hear yourself when you talk, do you? How can you handle being _that cheesy_?"

"Do you want me to stop?" Freddie smirked knowingly.

"Mmm, maybe tomorrow," Sam said, leaning her chin up to kiss him.

"You know," Freddie said, taking in the moment. "I know we're going to have a lot more anniversaries together, baby. I love you so much; you have really just-just made my life so perfect."

Sam blushed and stared back up at the stars, enjoying the feel of her boyfriend's arms around her. "I love you too," she said. Then she turned around and looked right at him. "Hey, actually, you know…I-I do have something for you."

"Sam, you don't have to-"

"I already have it, so just shut up and take it," Sam said firmly, and then quickly kissing the tip of his nose so he would know she didn't mean that. She reached into her purse and pulled out an envelope. She looked at for a few seconds, holding it tightly in her hands, and then she handed it to Freddie. "Here."

"What is it?" Freddie asked, starting to open the envelope.

"No, don't-don't open it now," Sam said. "Wait until tonight, after I leave."

"Why?" Freddie questioned.

"Just do it," Sam said. "For me?"

"Okay," Freddie said. "For you."

…..

"I wish my mom wasn't on her way back up," Freddie sighed as him and Sam stood outside the Shay's door later that evening.

"I know," Sam smiled as the couple shared on last kiss. "But we both know if Crazy found me at your place at two in the morning, she'd never let you out of her sight again."

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "I'll see you tomorrow morning, though."

"More like afternoon," Sam smirked. "Carly's probably waiting for me inside and isn't going to let me sleep until she pumps every detail of our date out of me."

"Of course," Freddie chuckled.

Just then they heard footsteps coming from around the corner of the hallway.

"That's her," Freddie whispered.

"Bye," Sam said, quickly opening the Shay's door.

"Bye Princess Puckett," Freddie replied, hurrying back into his own home.

Sure enough, a few seconds later, his mother came through the door.

"Fredward Benson!" she exclaimed, catching sight of her teenage son. "What do you think you're doing up at this hour? A growing boy needs sleep! You have a ten o'clock bedtime for a reason!"

"Well maybe if you didn't wake me up twice a night for your insane fire drills," Freddie mumbled under his breath.

Marissa gasped. "Sass from my little Freddikins? What has that no good Puckett done to you?"

"I'm not sassing," Freddie said quickly, rolling his eyes. "I'm going to bed now. Good night."

"I'll be in shortly to tuck you in!"  
"No!" Freddie frowned.

He retreated back to his bedroom and kicked off his shoes. It really had been the perfect night. Well, other than his mother's little episode back there, but that was practically inevitable. He was just about to pull of his jeans and put on some sweats when he felt the envelope Sam had given him in his pocket. He pulled it out, wondering what it could possibly contain that Sam didn't want him to see in front of him.

Freddie sat down on his bed and carefully opened the envelope. A single sheet of lined paper fell out, and Freddie instantly spotted Sam's less-than-neat handwriting on it.

_Freddie_, it read. _I don't know if I'm ever going to give this to you, but if you're reading this, that means I did. Or you were snooping around in my room, in which case, you have exactly three seconds to put this back before I pound your face in. _

_This is a love letter. I've never actually written one of these things before, so if it sucks, it's not my fault. So here it goes…_

_I love you. I guess I sort of have to start with that, don't I? Well, anyway, it's true. I know I don't exactly scream it out loud like you do for me, but that doesn't mean I don't still feel it. Carly always claims she falls in love with boys every other week, but I know that it's not the same as what I feel for you. I know I bug the chiz out of you, but if I didn't have you around, I think I'd be lost. You make me feel so special all the time, even when I don't deserve it. You're the best boyfriend there is out there, and just thinking about how your mine makes me all smiley and giggly…it's sickening sometimes. We've been together for a year now, and it has been the best year of my life. Every day, you told me I was beautiful. Every day you'd listen to me rant about something. Every single day you've held my and kissed me and made me realize how lucky I am. I love you, Freddie. So, so much. I hope you know that._

Freddie reread the letter again, his face absolutely beaming. This letter was the best thing he had ever gotten. He had always known Sam loved him. She said it on those rare occasions when they were completely alone and there was no risk of anyone around finding out that Sam Puckett actually had feelings. But to have this letter, to know that she actually took the time to put this together for him…it was something else.

He placed the letter down on his nightstand and pulled out his phone. He saw he had one new text message from Sam.

_Did you read it yet_? Sam's message read.

Freddie grinned. _Yeah_, he typed back. _You have no idea how much that meant to me Sam. Thank you. _

After another minute, he got another response back from her.

_You're not the only one who knows how to be cheesy, Benson. _


	377. Chapter 377

**AN-So this is another Sam&Cat /iCarly crossover, but this time Sam and Cat are heading back to Seattle!**

…**.**

_Spaghetti_

"Alright!" Sam cheered happily as she parked her motorcycle in front of Bushwell Plaza. "Here we are!"

"Finally!" Cat exclaimed, jumping off the back of the bike and taking off her helmet. "I need to pee!"

"You peed half an hour ago at that gas station," Sam pointed out.

"Well who made you the boss of my bladder?" Cat said snippily.

"I don't think that's a real job," Sam said.

"Well I'm sorry! I get sassy when I need to pee!" Cat said, starting to bounce up and down.

"Alright, alright, you can use Spencer's bathroom," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Come on, let's go before you explode."

"I don't want to explode!" Cat gasped.

The two girls hurried into the lobby.

"Hey! Why are you running in my lobby?" Lewbert screamed. Cat, not used to the doorman's behavior, shrieked and jumped behind Sam.

"And why are you back?" Lewbert yelled, realizing that the blonde in his lobby was none other than Sam. "I thought I finally got rid of you!"

"Can it, warty," Sam snapped.

"Why's his wart so big?" Cat whispered as they headed towards the stairs, ignoring Lewbert's shouts.

"I dunno, stress I think," Sam shrugged.

"It sort of looks like a surveillance camera," Cat mumbled. "Maybe he's a spy."

"Thank you!" Sam exclaimed.

When the girls reached apartment 8C, Sam didn't even bother to knock before barging in.

"Mama's back!" Sam announced.

"Hey, Sam!" Spencer grinned, hugging his little sister's best friend. "Good to see you again. Glad you decided to rough it up back here in old Seattle for Christmas."

"Eh, I couldn't stay away that long," Sam chuckled. "Oh, and this is Cat, my roommate from L.A. I told you about. Cat, this is Carly's older brother, Spencer."

"Hi," Spencer said, holding is hand out to the redhead.

"I gotta pee!" Cat said urgently, shaking his hand.

"Oh," Spencer said, quickly jerking his hand away. "Um, bathroom's right around that corner over there."

"Yay, thank you!" Cat cried, running back to where he indicated.

"Well, she seems…normal," Spencer commented.

"Says the man with the face on his stomach," Sam said knowingly, yanking up Spencer's t-shirt to reveal what looked like a very well drawn face.

"Uncle Belly Button's perfectly normal!" Spencer defended. "Oh! Remind me later to show you this new trick he does with a marshmallow and bubble gum!"

"Um, there's no way I'm missing that," Sam smirked.

"So how's L.A?" Spencer asked.

"Fun," Sam replied. "Babysitting is a lot of work and all, but it's not too bad."

"And how's the Sterling holding up?"

"Made it all the way down here with no problems," Sam said, high-fiving him.

"Sweet!" Spencer said.

"Hey, where's everyone else?" Sam asked. "I thought Carly would at least be here by now."

"She is," Spencer told her. "But her plane got in really late last night, so she's upstairs in her room sleeping. Gibby's on his way over, he just had to drop his cat off at opera lessons or something, and Freddie's across the hall with his mom, but he should actually be over here in a few-"

Right on cue, the apartment door opened again and Freddie came in.

"Sam!" he cried, spotting his girlfriend across the room and running over to her, pulling her into a deep kiss.

"Okay, _that _I did not miss," Spencer cringed. "Hey! People with eyes in the room here!"

"Oh come on, I haven't seen her in almost three months," Freddie said, not taking his eyes off of Sam.

"Yeah, we've got a lot of time to make up for," Sam said, lacing her arms around his neck.

"How was your ride down here?" Freddie asked her. "Did everything go good?"

"Yeah, besides making a million bathroom stops for Cat," Sam shrugged.

"Hey! Hey!" Cat yelled, running out of the bathroom. "You have purple toilet water in there!"

"Yeah, isn't it great?" Spencer nodded, pleased to see someone finally appreciate his colorful toilet water.

"Why don't we have purple toilet water?" Cat asked Sam sadly.

"Because who knows _what _you would do with that," Sam said, shuddering.

"Hey, Cat," Freddie smiled.

"Hi, Freddie," Cat replied.

"See, I told Carly purple toilet water was a necessity," Spencer said, still beaming. "Now our guests are entertained while they-"

"Gibby!" Gibby said loudly, entering the apartment.

"Where?" Cat asked, looking around.

"W-What?" Gibby frowned, staring at Cat.

"Ignore her, Gib, she's loopy off of toilet water," Sam said, giving Gibby a quick hug.

"But she ruined my entrance," Gibby mumbled. "Whoever she is."

"Gib, this is Sam's roommate from L.A. that's staying in Seattle for a few days with her," Freddie explained.

"Yeah, Cat," Sam nodded. "Remember? I told you about how her and I started a babysitting service?"

"Babysitting service?" Gibby repeated. "Oh, I thought you said _Bambie_ sitting. You know, like with Bambie dolls. I even brought you my Malibu Mindy doll to take care of." He pulled a doll out of the bag he was carrying and handed it to Sam. "Now, on Monday's you need to make sure she sits out in the sun for at least three hours because there's this pageant coming up, and-"

"Yeah, not happening," Sam said, getting ready to throw the doll in the nearby trashcan, but Cat quickly grabbed it from Sam's hands.

"No!" she exclaimed. "I'm not going to let you hurt another doll! Northridge Nancy is still having plastic surgery done."

"You have a Northridge Nancy?" Gibby gasped. "Shut up! Does she have the new accessories they've been advertising?"

Cat stared at him.

"Um…do you speak English?" Gibby asked slowly.

"Cat?" Sam said, shaking her shoulder. "Um, he's sort of talking to you."

"Well how can I answer him if he told me to shut up?" Cat whispered.

"Okay, that's it, I'm steaming some zucchinis," Gibby said, stepping into the kitchen.

"He seems stupid," Cat giggled.

"I'm not going to comment on that," Sam said, leaning up to give Freddie another kiss. "I missed you, baby."

"I've missed you too," Freddie said, hugging her tightly.

"Yeah, I'll say," Spencer scoffed. "Every stinking day after he gets home from school, I have to listen to five straight hours of 'I wonder what Sam's doing right now'. 'I wonder if I should call her again'. 'Do you think she's thinking of me right now?' It's like a teen soap opera in here!"

"Hey, I listen to your problems with that mail lady," Freddie pointed out. "Who, by the way, is in the process of filling out a restraining order against you, so if I were you, I'd-"

"What's going on here?" Carly demanded, coming downstairs, rushing over to Sam. "My best friend is just chilling down here and no one has the decency to _tell _me?"

"Well Spencer said you were asleep after your flight!" Sam grinned as the two threw their arms around each other. "We didn't want to wake you, kid!"

"Please, you know I wouldn't have cared," Carly chuckled. "But oh my God! You're here! You're really here in Seattle again, and I'm here, and Freddie and Gibby are here and it's just like old times!"

"Hey!" Gibby said indignantly from the kitchen. "I _happened _to have gotten a new haircut!"

"Okay…" Carly said, giving him a strange look. "So it's like old times except for Gibby's new hair."

"Thank you," Gibby said, satisfied, as he turned back to his zucchinis.

Carly turned to Cat. "Hey, Cat! How are you?"

"I'm good," Cat said. "Do you know your bathroom has purple toilet water?"

"Ugh, you bought more of that dye?" Carly moaned, looking at her older brother.

"Um, do you not see the joy in this young girls face?" Spencer asked, putting his hands on Cat's shoulders. "If my purple toilet water can do this to even just one slightly peculiar teenage girl, then I feel my job is done."

"Isn't Purple Toilet Water a band?" Freddie asked.

"If it isn't, it should be," Sam nodded. She put her hands on her stomach. "Okay people, I've been all happy and huggy for a solid ten minutes. Now where's Mama's food?"

"Oh, right," Spencer said, running over to the fridge. "I made a whole batch of spaghetti tacos last night."

"Whoo!" Sam cheered.

"They're made with some special spaghetti I brought back from Italy and gave him," Carly grinned.

"Wow," Freddie commented, looking at the tray Spencer sat down on the table. "Those look amazing, Spence."

"Anyone want some zucchini on theirs?" Gibby asked.

"No one wants your zucchini," Sam said, grabbing a spaghetti taco and biting into it. "Oh man, my taste buds are on fire! This so beats the gas station food I've been living off of for the past twelve hours!"

"Wait," Cat said, clutching her head, confused. "What's going on? Why is there _spaghetti _in the taco shells? You can't put Italian pasta in a Mexican corn shell! What is this madness-"

"Shut up and eat," Sam said simply, shoving a spaghetti taco in Cat's mouth.

"Mmm!" Cat said, chewing. "Yay for wacky, creative food!"

"That's chick's not right in the head," Gibby mumbled to Sam and Freddie, sprinkling chocolate chips on his zucchini.

After everyone had helped themselves to plenty of spaghetti tacos, Sam was helping Carly make some lemonade.

"So the babysitting service still good?" Carly asked.

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "We have a lot more kids now, though, so it's crazier, but also more money for my fried chicken."

"You and your chicken," Carly chuckled.

"Is Italy still amazing?" Sam asked.

"Oh yeah," Carly said happily. "And I think I'm real close to having this cute guy in my history class ask me out!"

"Alright, Carls," Sam laughed. "But, um, how much longer do you think you're going to stay there?"

"Probably through graduation," Carly sighed. "I've already sent in a few applications for colleges back here. Washington state, NYU, a few private colleges all around…"

"Well at least I'll have my best friend back in the same continent," Sam said.

"Well we need to take advantage of being back in Seattle together while we can," Carly said, placing the pitcher of lemonade in the fridge.

"Definitely," Sam agreed. "But we _are_ having one of our famous sleepovers tonight…"

"I've got the cookie dough and cheesy movies all ready to go," Carly grinned.

"Thanks again for letting me and Cat stay tonight," Sam said. "Once my mom gets back from her tattoo guy in Olympia, we'll stay at my place."

"Come on, you know I don't mind," Carly said. "I wish you guys would be staying here longer. But I guess you should spend some time with your mom too."

"Eh, it's my mom," Sam said. "We'll spend one day together and we'll be good. You know even if I'm staying there I'll be practically living here anyway."

"True," Carly laughed. She looked at her Pearphone. "Oh, it's officially sleepover time! Time to jammie it up!"

"Sweet!" Sam grinned. She turned to Cat, who was playing Chutes and Spiders, a board game Spencer had invented, in the living room with the guys. "Cat! You ready to see one of our sleepovers?"

"Ooh, yeah!" Cat nodded, getting to her feet.

"Lucky," Gibby mumbled. "You know how hard it is to get an invite to those?"

"We _are_ pretty exclusive," Carly smirked as the three girls ran up to Carly's room.

"Hey, I need to use your hairbrush really quick," Sam said as Carly opened the door to her room. "I think I still have helmet hair and-"

"Oh my God!" Cat squealed, making Carly and Sam jump as the redhead ran around Carly's very girly room. "This is the coolest room ever! It's so pink and pretty and pink!"

"Aw, thanks," Carly said. "Spencer's actually the one who-"

"Look at the little boat on the coffee table!" Cat yelled, ignoring Carly's comment. "I love boats! And look at the funny pillows on the bed! And look at-whoa! An ice cream chair! Look! I'm sitting on ice cream!"

"Just like that time at the sushi place," Sam chuckled.

"That made my butt cold," Cat said softly.

"This is going to be so much fun," Carly said, grabbing a pair of pajamas from her drawer. "I can't wait!"

"Me neither, kid," Sam said. "But, um, hey, I think I'm gonna run downstairs to just say goodnight to Freddie really quick before he goes back home."

"Okay," Carly nodded.

"Holy gumdrops, candy heart seats!" Cat exclaimed as Sam left the room.

Sam headed downstairs and laced her arms around Freddie's neck from behind the couch.

"Hey," Freddie smiled, kissing her. "I was getting worried. I thought you were ditching me without even giving me a goodnight kiss."

"Never," Sam chuckled.

"Ugh!" Gibby and Spencer moaned.

"Let's go out in the hall," Sam said, thumping Gibby and Spencer's head as she passed them, hand in hand with her boyfriend.

Once in the hall, Sam wasted no time pressing her lips to Freddie's, who readily reciprocated. After a few moments, though, when they were forced to pull away in order to replenish their lungs.

"I'm sorry we didn't really get to spend that much time together today," Sam whispered as Freddie wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Baby, it's fine," Freddie assured her. "We have the rest of the week together. You and Carly need this sleepover."

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "I just wish I could stay here a little longer."

"I know," Freddie mumbled, hugging her tightly. "I-I really wish you could too."

"You alright?" Sam asked, looking up at him.

"Y-Yeah," Freddie sighed. "It's just…now that I think about it…a week isn't that long, is it?"

"No," Sam agreed, resting her head on his shoulder. "It's not."

"I mean, don't-don't get me wrong," Freddie said quickly. "I'm happy that you've got this great business and life down in L.A. now. But sometimes…sometimes it's _hard _Sam. It's hard having you so far away all the time. It's like Seattle's empty without you."

"You still have Gib and Spencer," Sam reminded him.

"It's still not the same," Freddie said, playing with the ends of her hair.  
"Well, in a few months, you'll be leaving Seattle too," Sam pointed out. "For college, once you figure out where you're going."

"That still doesn't help the fact that you won't be there with me," Freddie said softly.

Sam stood on her toes and gently kissed him. "Hey, wanna hear some big news?"

"Big news?"

"A couple of weeks ago," Sam said. "Cat and I were talking, we were thinking that next year…next year we open up an official daycare center. You know, like in a building and not out of our living room."

"Really?" Freddie grinned. "Sam, baby, that-that's fantastic! I'm so proud of you, I really am."

"Thanks," Sam said. "It's sort of exciting…this is going to be like our actual _careers _now, not just some afterschool gig."

"You guys are going to do great," Freddie said firmly. "And-And even if that means it's going to be a little harder for _us_, I promise that we'll make it work, because Sam, I love you so much. Being away from you like this has really made me realize just how important you are to me."

"I love you too," Sam said, her eyes sparkling. "Oh, and there's more."

"What?"

"Well, it was Cat's idea, really," Sam told him. "She's the one who pointed it out to me…"

"What is it?" Freddie asked.

"Okay," Sam said. "When Cat and I were talking about getting an official place, we were looking at what we had saved, and it is a _lot_. We put that twelve-year old, Dice, in charge of our savings, and that kid is _good _with money. We can literally afford to go anywhere we want in the country next year."

"That's so impressive," Freddie said. "It really is. It's-"

"Baby, I don't think you're following," Sam said. "We can go _anywhere_."

"Yeah?"

"Ugh, come on! Use your head!" Sam said playfully, swatting his shoulder.

"Sam, I'm really not getting where you're going with this," Freddie said.

"Well, since we don't have to stay in L.A.," Sam said slowly. "Cat suggested that we wait to buy a place until after _you _figure out where you're going to college. That way _we _can get a place there, and you and I wouldn't be apart all the time."

"Wait," Freddie said, his eyes widening. "You're saying you'd come with me to wherever I go to college?"

"Uh-huh," Sam said, beaming. "I mean, everywhere has kids, that's all we need!"

"I-I-That's-That'd be perfect, Sam," Freddie said. "I'd love that. Being about to see you in person and not over a webcam…but-but is that what you want?"

Sam nodded. "Freddie, I hate being away from you too. A lot. There are some days in L.A. where I almost want to get on my motorcycle and just drive up to see you for one night. That's why Cat suggested this. She said she knows how much I miss you."

Freddie smiled. "She's a real good friend then."

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "She is. Although she's probably trying to stuff all of Carly's room in her bag to take back to L.A. with us right now…"

"You should get back to them," Freddie told her. "I need to get back home too in a few minutes. It's almost my curfew."

"Wow," Sam said, checking the time on her phone. "You get to stay out until ten now?"

"I wore my mom down," Freddie chuckled, giving Sam one last long kiss. "I'll see you tomorrow, baby. I have the perfect date night all planned for us."

"Can't wait," Sam said, blushing as she turned to go back into the apartment.


	378. Chapter 378

_Shirt_

"Freddie, did you finish editing the last of Super Bra last night?" Carly asked.

"Uh-huh," Freddie nodded, looking up from his Pearbook he was typing on in a beanbag chair up in the iCarly studio.

"And Sam, you picked up the kitty litter, right?" Carly asked. "Sam? Sam?"

"Baby, wake up," Freddie said, gently shaking the shoulder of his girlfriend, who was napping in the beanbag chair next to him.

"Huh, what?" Sam sputtered, her eyes flying open.

"The kitty litter," Carly repeated, somewhat amused. "Did you pick it up?"

"Oh, yeah," Sam nodded. "It's in that bag over there."

"Perfect," Carly said. "I'm trying to make sure we have everything now because tonight we're going to be busy studying for our trig test."

"Oh, right," Freddie said. "We're studying together here?"

"Is your mom home?" Carly asked.

"Yes."

"Then yup, here works," Carly nodded.

"I can't believe you two study for a test a whole week in advance," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"You _could _study with us," Freddie pointed out.

"Aw, baby, that's so cute that you think that's going to happen," Sam smiled, leaning over to give him a quick kiss.

"Nice try, Freddie," Carly sighed. "Anyway, just tell me where you put Gibby's pilot shirt for tomorrow night and then we'll be all set."

"You never told me I was supposed to pick up the pilot shirt," Freddie frowned. "You were supposed to do it."

"Um…no I wasn't," Carly said. "And I _did _tell you that you needed to pick it up from the dry cleaners."

"No," Freddie said, giving a small, awkward chuckle. "You did not, Carls."

"Freddie, I'm pretty sure I remember specifically telling you this," Carly said, pulling on a strained smile. "I said 'Freddie, pick up the pilot's shirt from the dry cleaners'."

"No, I'm _positive _that you said 'Freddie, pick_ing_ up the pilot's shirt from the dry cleaners'. As in, _you _were on your way to do it."

"Well, why wouldn't I have just said, 'Freddie, don't worry about picking up the pilot's shirt because I'm going to do it myself,'?" Carly asked.

"Don't ask me," Freddie shrugged. "You said it."

"No, I didn't!" Carly said again, her voice rising slightly.

"Um…" Sam said, frowning at the odd scene that was unraveling in front of her. "You guys-"

"Carly, if you forgot to pick up the shirt, then just admit it," Freddie said, getting to his feet. "There's no need to try and pass the blame around to me."

"You're the one who forgot to pick up the shirt!" Carly exclaimed.

"You forgot!" Freddie snapped. "Just like you forgot to pick up the chocolate chips for last week's web show!"

Carly gasped. "Well maybe I forgot because I was so busy trying to reedit the credits on the Idiot Farm Girl bit to look less stupid!"

"How dare you insult my editing!" Freddie cried. "Besides, there wasn't much I could do with that video because I spent all my time trying to blotch out a pimple on _someone's _nose!"

"It was a bug bite!"

"Sure!"

"Hey, guys, what's going on here?" Sam asked, standing up. "Because I'm sort of confused and-"

"Well," Carly said, throwing her hands up in the air. "We might as well cancel the show for tomorrow night since we don't have that shirt!"

"Yeah, and be sure to let all the viewers know it's _your fault_!" Freddie said loudly.

"That's it!" Carly snapped, glaring at Freddie. "I'm out of here!"

"Me too!" Freddie said angrily, storming out of the studio behind Carly, leaving Sam alone.

"Well," Sam said to the empty studio. "This is new…"

…

Sam walked into the Shay's apartment next day and spotted Spencer, working on a sculpture.

"I'm sculpting, I'm sculpting things, sculpting things for people to see," Spencer sung quietly to himself.

"Hey, Spence," Sam sighed, flopping down on the couch.

"Oh, hey kid," Spencer said. "What's up?"

"Well, Carly and Freddie are pretty much killing me," Sam said, massaging her temples.

"Um, they're killing _you_," Spencer frowned.

"Yeah, they're in a big fight," Sam explained. "And since Carly's my best friend and Frednub's my boyfriend, I'm stuck in the middle."

"Wow," Spencer said slowly. "That's…weird."

"I know, right?" Sam nodded. "This isn't supposed to happen! It's supposed to be me and Freddie fighting, with Carly as our mediator, that's how its always been!" And the few times me and Carly have fought, Freddie was our mediator!"

"So why don't you be the mediator?" Spencer asked.

"Have you _met _me?" Sam frowned. "Do you know how I tell people to solve their problems? I tell them to fight it out in the Octagon!"

"Yeah, that wouldn't end well," Spencer said. "Freddie and Carly don't know how to fight."

"I'm telling you, this is all backwards," Sam said.

"What are they even fighting about anyway?" Spencer asked.

"I don't know, something about who was supposed to pick up a shirt from the dry cleaners," Sam sighed. "We needed it for iCarly tonight, but since they canceled the show…"

"Well why didn't they just run down to the cleaners today and get the shirt?"

"Because, don't you remember? The dry cleaners guy hates us," Sam said. "Because Gibby insulted his mustache. So whenever we bring in our costumes and stuff to be cleaned, we have to make sure we get them the second they're done otherwise the dude gives them away to hobos."

"Ah," Spencer nodded.

"All I know is I can't take this stress," Sam said, getting to her feet. "I'm the one who always causes the tension in the little group! I'm not used to being the one the tension is inflicted _on_!"

"Where are you going?" Spencer questioned.

"To suck down my stress with a smoothie!"

…

Sam sat down in the Groovy Smoothie, sipping her Blueberry Blitz.

"Hey, Puckett!" T-Bo said, coming over to her table. "Wanna buy a garlic bulb?"

"No," Sam said. "Unless I can use it to make you go away."

"Are you implying I'm a vampire?" T-Bo frowned.

"Gee, aren't you smart?" Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"What's up with you? Why you sitting here all along?" T-Bo asked. "Where's Carly and Benson?"

"I dunno, but they're driving me nuts," Sam sighed. "They're fighting."

"_They're _fighting?"

"I know, crazy," Sam sighed. "But yeah, and I'm stuck in the middle. It's been awful. Today at lunch it was the most awkward half-hour of my life. They kept talking only to me. I barely had a chance to finish my extra-ham sandwich. It almost made me glad that Principal Franklin never took my suggestion for a one hour lunch period."

Just then the door of the Groovy Smoothie dinged and Freddie walked in.

"Hey baby," Freddie smiled, sitting down next to Sam. He looked up at T-Bo. "Um, is that a stick of garlic bulbs?"

"Yes," T-Bo snapped. "You got a problem with garlic?"

"No, it just doesn't seem like something you'd sell in a smoothie shop," Freddie said.

"Snob!" T-Bo shouted, heading back towards the counter.

"So what are you doing here?" Freddie asked.

"Just wanted a smoothie," Sam shrugged. "So, um, baby? Did-Did you happen to have a chance to make up with Carly yet?"

"Who said I was making up with her?" Freddie frowned.

"Ugh, please, this is stupid!" Sam said. "I'm the ones who's supposed to get into immature fights, not you guys! What's going on here!"

"Look, I'll be happy to accept an apology from Carly, if she chooses to give me on," Freddie said simply. "But since I did nothing wrong, I don't see the need to go to her and beg for forgiveness."

"Come on, she's one of your best friends," Sam said. "So you two had a little…disagreement? Who cares! You two have been buds for years, and if you guys let a stupid shirt get in the way of that, you're idiots, and-and do you _hear _me know? I never sound this logical!"

"Sam, this is about my pride," Freddie said firmly. "I'm not going to apologize for something-"

The door of the shop suddenly opened again, and in walked Carly.

"Hey, Sam," Carly said pleasantly. She narrowed eyes when she caught sight of Freddie. "What are _you _doing here?"

"Having smoothies with my girlfriend, is that a crime?" Freddie said coldly. "What are _you _doing here?"

"Having smoothies with my _best friend_," Carly snapped, sitting down on Sam's other side.

"Guys, forget about the stupid shirt already!" Sam exclaimed.

"You know, best friend totally trumps boyfriend," Carly said smugly to Freddie, ignoring Sam's comment.

"In what universe?" Freddie scoffed. "Sam totally sides with me in this, don't you, baby? You know Carly never asked me to pick up any shirt."

"Oh, you're not going to fall for that 'baby' chiz are you?" Carly said, moving closer to Sam. "We're practically sisters! We shared toothbrushes once!"

"I'm not picking sides!" Sam said firmly. "Come on, don't do this! I'm not picking between my boyfriend and my best friend over an argument about a dang shirt!"

"It's not even just about the shirt," Freddie said, crossing his arms. "It's about Carly always thinking she's right."

"_I _always think I'm right?" Carly laughed. "You always think you're right! Doesn't he, Sam?"

"Sam, you know that's not true," Freddie said. "Let's get out of here, baby, I'll go buy you some Churros!"

"No, let's go to Build-A-Bra!" Carly said, grabbing Sam's wrist.

"Okay, that's it, you're both _insane_!" Sam said loudly, kicking away her chair as she got to her feet. "And for your information, you both always think you're right! Neither of you ever admit when you're wrong about something! It's _annoying_! And you know what else? You're both acting like-like _me_! Yeah, that's right! And there's only room for one Sam Puckett in a group, so you two better stop acting immature and stubborn and leave that to me because I can't take it!"

And with that she stormed out of the Groovy Smoothie, leaving a very confused Carly and Freddie behind.

…

The next day at school, Sam stood at her locker, waiting for the small microwave inside it to finish warming up her Food Pocket.

Just as the microwave finished, Carly and Freddie walked slowly around the corner and stopped next to Sam.

"H-Hey," Carly said.

Sam didn't reply as she pulled her snack out of her locker. She simply glared at them.

"Listen, baby," Freddie sighed. "We wanted to apologize for the way we acted yesterday…it wasn't fair to try and put you in the middle of things."

"Yeah, it was our fight, not yours," Carly agreed. "You shouldn't have had to choose between your boyfriend and best friend. And you were right, we were acting stupid. I mean, we got crazy over a stupid shirt, and like you said, neither one of us likes admitting we're wrong, so I guess we just got a little…hotheaded."

"But we're truly sorry, Sam," Freddie said. "And-And Carly and I talked yesterday after you left, and we made up."

"So things are good again," Carly said, giving her a small smile. "Aren't you happy?"

"Sam?" Freddie frowned. "Did you hear us?"

"Um, y-yeah," Sam nodded slowly. "Just…not really used to being on the receiving end on one of these speeches. It's…it's something."

"So do you forgive us?" Carly chuckled.

Sam rolled her eyes. "I'd be sort of a hypocrite if I didn't. How many fights of mine have you guys helped fix?"

"Aw," Carly said happily, holding out her arms. "So do this mean we can-"

"No!" Sam said firmly. "No group hug!"

"Fine," Carly sighed.

"Oh, and I almost forgot about this," Sam said, unzipping her backpack and tossing the two of them a blue pilot's shirt.

"Whoa, you got the shirt?" Freddie said, examining the piece of clothing.

"Mama knows how to get things done," Sam said proudly.

"Well how'd you get it?" Carly asked. "The dry cleaner guy gives our stuff away to hobos if we don't pick it up right away."

"I know," Sam nodded. "But yesterday when I was walking home after the Groovy Smoothie, I saw a hobo wearing this, so I traded him my snow cone for it."

"Isn't my girlfriend the best?" Freddie said, putting an around Sam.

"Yes," Sam grinned. "I am. Now I'm gonna go have some fun out in the teacher's parking lot. I feel like I've been too reasonable and logical lately."

"So you're solution is to trash teachers' cars?" Carly frowned.

"It's the solution to everything," Sam shrugged, grabbing a can of spray paint from her locker. "Later!"

As she ran off, with Carly and Freddie right behind her, voicing their protests, she smiled to herself.

_Back to normal_, she thought. _At last. _


	379. Chapter 379

_Pajamas_

Sam's eyes flew open as she was woken from her peaceful sleep by the blaring of the alarm clock on her bedside table. She slammed it forcefully with her fist, burying her face into her pillow trying to some how muster up the energy to leave her warm bed.

Suddenly, she felt a pair of strong arms snake around her waist and picked her head up and looked over to see her husband, Freddie, slowly opening his eyes.

"Morning," he said softly, pulling her closer to him.

"Morning, baby," Sam smiled, giving him a quick peck on the lips.

Even though Sam and Freddie had been married for a little over three months, Sam still couldn't get used to the overpowering sensation of waking up next to him every day. As much as she hated mornings, he actually managed to make them bearable for her.

"You still tired?" Freddie asked, knowingly, stroking her tangled curls.

"Duh," Sam grinned. "It's seven in the morning."

She yawned as she slowly sat up and got to her feet.

"Maybe we shouldn't have stayed up so late last night," Freddie said, getting out of bed as well.

"You didn't enjoy yourself?" Sam smirked, grabbing her work clothes from the closet and tossing them on the bed. "Because if I recall…"

"Of course I enjoyed myself, baby, how could I _not_?" Freddie said, his eyes shining.

"Better," Sam said approvingly. "But now we get to go off to another fun day of work."

She made to start peeling her pajamas off so she could get changed for the day, but Freddie quickly grabbed her hand.

"Wait, Sam," Freddie said thoughtfully. "What if we…what if we both played hooky today?"

Sam gave him a strange look. "Um…did I just hear that right? _You_, Mr. Perfect Attendance all throughout high school, want to skip work?"

"It could be fun," Freddie said, grinning. "We could just hang around here in our pajamas all day and just relax together."

"Hey, you don't have to convince _me_," Sam said. "You know I'm always down for keeping my pajamas on as long as possible."

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "I know. And you know what else? You look absolutely stunning in them."

Sam rolled her eyes. "Where'd you pick that one up? Husband school?"

"Husband school?" Freddie repeated, amused. "Yeah, that's a thing."

…..

An hour later, after Sam and Freddie had called in sick at their jobs, they were laying in bed, eating the delicious breakfast of Belgian waffles and bacon that Freddie had prepared.

"Wow, breakfast in bed," Sam said, biting into a piece of bacon. "You know how to play hooky _good_ Benson."

"Thank you, _Benson_," Freddie chuckled, kissing the tip of his wife's nose.

"This is the life," Sam sighed, resting her head on his shoulder. "Laying in bed in our pajamas all day…"

"Well, hopefully there will be parts of the day when the pajamas _aren't _on," Freddie said, raising an eyebrow suggestively.

"We'll see," Sam smirked. "Although after these _amazing _waffles, you're getting there."

Freddie laughed and kissed her again. "I love you, Sam. Even if we do just lounge around in our pajamas all day, it's still perfect because I'm with you. I love having you as my wife."

"You're not too shabby of a husband either," Sam grinned, kissing him back, cuddling closer to him. "Hey, baby?"

"Yeah?"

"What's been your favorite thing so far?" Sam asked.

"What do you mean?"

"What's been your favorite thing about being married so far?" Sam asked.

"Hmm," Freddie said, pursing his lips in thoughts. "Just one?"

"Nub," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Okay, okay, I've got it," Freddie said. He took a deep breath. "My favorite part about being married so far is getting to wake up every morning and see the most beautiful woman by my side sleeping so peacefully."

Sam blushed and looked down at her lap. "Really?" she whispered.

"I'll never get tired of it," Freddie said truthfully. He kissed the top of her head. "Hey? What about you? What do you like the best so far?"

"What? I'm supposed to top _that _answer?"

"It's not a contest," Freddie said. "I just want to hear it."

"Okay…" Sam said thoughtfully. "Let's see…um…oh! I've got it! My favorite part of being married so far is …finally having someone to spend the entire day in pajamas with who I love being with."

"Aw," Freddie grinned. "That's so sweet, Sam."

Sam smirked as she swiped off a bit of whipped cream from her waffle and smeared it across Freddie's face.

"Yup, saw that coming," Freddie sighed.

"Good," Sam said, laughing.

Freddie reached for a napkin, but Sam quickly stopped him.

"I've got it," she said, leaning down and kissing the spot on his face with whipped cream.


	380. Chapter 380

_Laundry_

"Come on," Sam moaned, dragging a sack of laundry down the stairs of her and Freddie's home. "Why's this thing so heavy?"

"Hey, hey!" Carly said brightly, letting herself in. When she caught sight of best friend lugging a heavy sack down the stairs, her smile faltered. "Um, Sam? What's in that bag?"

"Laundry," Sam mumbled, finally succeeding in getting the sack down the steps.

"Oh thank God," Carly said, breathing in relief. "What are you doing with a sack of laundry, though?"

"I'm gonna wash some clothes," Sam replied, heading into the laundry room.

"You?" Carly frowned.

"Yes," Sam said, raising an eyebrow. "Why? Is that a problem?"

"No, no," Carly said quickly. "It's just, I thought Freddie did your guys' laundry."

"He _used _to," Sam corrected her. "But now I'm taking over."

"Why? Did you lose a bet?"

"No!" Sam said indignantly. "Jeesh, why is so wrong for me to be doing laundry?"

"Because you're _you_," Carly chuckled. "You hate housework. Have you ever done a load of laundry before in your _life_?"

"Could you stop being a downer?" Sam snapped.

"Sam, you're my best friend," Carly said firmly. "I know you better than anyone, and I know there has to be a dang good reason for you to be willingly doing laundry."

"Fine!" Sam conceded. "I-I'm doing it to shut Freddie's mom up!"

"Laundry's going to shut that woman up?" Carly scoffed. "How?"

"Well, lately she's been coming over, you know, being her usual obnoxious self," Sam explained, beginning to unload the sack of clothes. "And she keeps making all these comments. '_Why is my Freddikins unloading the dishwasher on his own?' 'Why is my poor son vacuuming while his wife sits around eating ham?' 'Why is my precious baby not being treated right by his wife?'_"

"Oh, I-I can see how that can get to a person," Carly said. "But come on, Sam, you're a great wife for Freddie!"

"I know," Sam mumbled. "But, I just want her to stop making all these snide remarks about how pathetic I am, especially since I'm not allowed to hit her. And last week she came over and decided to the laundry on her own since Freddie was at work, and the whole time she kept rubbing it in my face!"

"Oh," Carly nodded. "So now you're doing your own laundry to show her up?"

"That's right," Sam said proudly, measuring out several cups of laundry detergent. "Besides, if she can do it, how hard can it be?"

"Um, Sam?" Carly frowned.

"What?"

"You put the dirty clothes in the dryer instead of the washer."

….

"Hey, baby?" Freddie called, entering his home a few moments later. "You home?"

"Y-Yeah!" Sam called back. "I'll be right there!"

"Word of advice," Freddie said, hanging up his jacket by the door. "Never, _ever _go fish food shopping with Gibby. He's way too particular about what his stupid goldfish eats. I don't know who's worse. Spencer, who has to be reminded to keep his gold fish in water if he's going to insist on walking it, or Gibby, who goes and orders a thirty gallon tank for one little-Sam?"

Sam came into the room, dripping wet with a few stray soap bubbles in her hair. "Hey, so, um, you-you had fun shopping with Gibby?"

"Baby, what happened?" Freddie asked, unable to hold back a laugh.

"Nothing," Sam said. "I-I fell asleep and I woke up like this."

"You smell like someone dumped an entire container of fabric softener on you," Freddie commented.

"That's my _perfume_," Sam snapped.

"And you have a dryer sheet stuck to your shoulder," Freddie continued. He smiled as he leaned down to kiss his wife. "Baby, you weren't-you weren't doing _laundry_, were you?"

"Why does everyone think that's so shocking?" Sam groaned.

"Wait, you were?" Freddie said. "Sam, that's great! I'm so happy you're starting to do laundry. I mean, not that I minded doing it before, but I think splitting the housework more between us will really strengthen our marriage."

"Oh don't go all Dr. Phyllis on me," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I did it so your mom would stop bugging the living chiz out of me."

"Oh, well, um, I-I guess that works," Freddie said.

"Yeah, I-I just wanted her to stop thinking I was a terrible wife, making you do everything," Sam sighed.

"Hey, Sam, that's not true at all," Freddie said firmly. "You're the best wife there is, and I love you so much! And you do a lot around here. You're an amazing cook, you kill all the bugs for me, you do yard work…"

"Yeah, but you do way more," Sam mumbled. "And your mom always says-"

"Who cares what she says?"

Sam looked up at him. "Whoa. You-You've never said that before."

"Baby, you and I both know she's _very _overbearing," Freddie said. "And she says things that are way out of line sometimes. I'm sorry she made you feel like you weren't a good wife. But you are, you really are. Even if you made me kill my own disgusting, terrifying spider the other night…"

Sam smiled. "So you think I'm a good wife?"

"You're the best one around," Freddie said.

"Well, hang onto that thought," Sam said slowly. "Because I sort of turned all your clothes pink."


	381. Chapter 381

_Training_

Freddie Benson sat happily on his couch, his feet propped up on his coffee, which was one of the few pleasures he allowed himself when his mother was away on her Aggressive Parenting conventions. He was eating a bowl of fruit not in sauce form and watching a set of fencing training DVDs he had borrowed from Spencer. It was definitely a good day for him; in fact, the only thing that could make it better would be-

"Yo, yo," Sam said happily, letting herself into her boyfriend's apartment.

"Hey," Freddie grinned, quickly pausing his DVD so he could properly greet his girlfriend. "What are you doing here baby? I was just about to call you."

"Well, Carly went to get her nails done, and we both know there's no way I'd step place in one of those salons," Sam said. "So I thought I'd stop by and visit you since Crazy's gone."

"Sweet," Freddie said. "Come watch this fencing documentary with me!"

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Really? You want to watch a documentary with your girlfriend on one of the few days when we have an empty apartment."

"Well what else is there to-" Freddie began, but then he caught sight of Sam's suggestive smirk. "Oh…"

"You thinking what I'm thinking?" Sam asked, happy to see he was catching on.

"I think I am," Freddie said, leaning down to kiss her deeply. "An epic round of Meat Golf?"

"I brought the meat," Sam smiled.

…. …..

"Well Benson, here we are again," Sam said smugly, leaning on her golf club. "Two hours of Meat Golf and as usual, I'm crushing you."

"There's still time for me to come back," Freddie said.

"After my five straight hole-in-one's?" Sam smirked. "Not likely." She began looking around the apartment at a bunch of strange looking devices that were set out on a nearby table. "Hey, baby? What's this?"

She held up an odd looking speaker.

"Oh, that's just one of my mom's latest gizmos," Freddie sighed. "It's some sort of alarm that's supposed to go off twice a day randomly while she's away."

"Why?"

"Because that's when I'm supposed to check my leg hair for ticks," Freddie said, rolling his eye.

"Oh my God," Sam laughed. "Have you done it yet?"

"No, and I'm not going to," Freddie snapped. "Now shush so I can make this shot!"

"I'm telling you, Fredweirdo, you might as well give up," Sam said, walking back over to Freddie as he prepared his shot.

"Yeah, yeah," Freddie mumbled. He swung his club back, but at that second the alarm went off, emitting a loud blaring siren sound that caught Freddie by surprise, causing the club to swing out of his hands.

"Ow!" Sam cried.

"Sam!" Freddie exclaimed, realizing too late that the golf club had hit Sam square in the face. She had fallen to her knees and was clutching her face in her hands. "Baby, baby I'm so sorry! Let me see, are you okay!"

"No! My face is on fire!" Sam yelled. She moved her hands away for a second and Freddie almost gagged at the sight of the pool of blood pouring from her nose.

"Okay, Sam, I-I think we need to get you to the hospital," Freddie said, trying to stay calm as he helped her to her feet.

"No! No hospitals!" Sam said, wincing as she felt the pain shooting though her nose.

"You need to go! I-I think your nose might be broken," Freddie explained.

"Broken?" Sam shouted.

"Come on, we'll go get Spencer to drive us," Freddie said, grabbing a towel from the counter and giving it to Sam to use to soak up some of the blood.

"They're gonna take off my nose!" Sam moaned.

"Not sure that's possible," Freddie said, quickly leading Sam out of the apartment. "You're going to be fine baby. I'm so sorry, though, Sam, this is all my fault. And-And it might not be broken, but let's just get you checked out to-to be sure."

"I won Meat Golf," Sam said weakly though the pain.

"Of course you did," Freddie nodded. "Of course you did."

….

"Sam, really, you can't even tell," Freddie said four hours later as the couple entered Freddie's apartment again.

"What do you mean you can't tell?" Sam snapped, pointing to the large metal plate that was covering her broken nose and half her face. "I look like a freak!"

"Um, well a-a _sexy _freak," Freddie said.

"And I have to go to school like this?" Sam moaned, looking at her reflection in the mirror. "Everyone's going to stare!"

"Sam, no they won't," Freddie assured her.

"Yes they will, I would!" Sam moaned.

"I'm still really sorry," Freddie said, wrapping his arms around her. "This is all my fault."

"No, it's your mom's fault for buying that stupid alarm!" Sam said hotly. She slumped down on the couch. "Baby, there's no way I'm going to school tomorrow."

"You can't skip school," Freddie said gently, sitting down next to her.

"Yes I can."  
"Sam, come on, you're not the type of girl who cares what other people think," Freddie said.

Sam mumbled something Freddie couldn't make out.

"What?"

"I-I care a little," Sam whispered.

Freddie gave her a small smile. "Sam…"

"It's stupid, I know," Sam sighed.

"No it's not, not at all," Freddie said. "Everyone's a little self-conscious. I mean, I know I would be if I had to go to school with a huge metal cast thing taped to my face."

"Not helping," Sam said.

"Look, people are going to stare, yes, you're right," Freddie said. "And-And it probably _will_ feel a little awkward for you. But you just need to ignore that and walk through those halls with the same confidence you have every other day. Once people realize that you're not embarrassed, they won't look at you like you should be."

"You really think so?"

"I do," Freddie nodded.

Sam smiled. "You know, I'd kiss you right now if that wouldn't hurt my face."

"I'll take a rain check then," Freddie chuckled.

"And, you know," Sam continued, checking out her reflection in her phone screen. "I sort of look like that killer from that one movie with the clowns…I can have some fun with this. You think I could freak Gibby out? Oh! That'd be so cool! You distract him and I'll hide in his closet and scare the snot out of him! This is going to be awesome!"


	382. Chapter 382

_Ivy_

"Dude, you know what I was thinking about in the shower today?" Spencer asked, sitting down on his couch next to Freddie.

"Um…showering?" Freddie guessed.

"I was thinking about a way to make smoothies even better," Spencer said, ignoring Freddie's comment. "So I know you put milk and yogurt in them to make them all thick and creamy, but what if you used_ ice cream _instead? It would be even thicker and creamier! It would be delicious! We could call them Ice Cream Smoothies! You think I should tell T-Bo about this and work out some sort of deal with him with this or should I start my own rival restaurant and-"

"Spence," Freddie sighed. "They already have smoothies made from ice cream. They're called _milkshakes_."

"W-What?" Spencer frowned. "You're joking."

"You've drank milkshakes before," Freddie pointed out.

"Yeah, but-but these will be fruity," Spencer said lamely. "And they'll be called Ice Cream Smoothies instead-instead of milkshakes, and-and-Oh! Forget about it!"

"Where are you going?" Freddie asked as Spencer got to his feet and headed to the door.

"To get a milkshake, or an Ice Cream Smoothie," Spencer said. "Or-Or-I don't know anymore! I'm so confused!"

"Oh-_kay_," Freddie said, rolling his eyes as Spencer shut the door behind him. A few minutes later, though, the door opened again and Carly and Sam walked in.

"Hey, where were you guys?" Freddie asked as Sam sat down next to him and gave him a quick kiss.

"We were at the mall with Wendy," Sam replied.

"Yes, where I had to _beg _the two of them not to pour bottles of dish soap into the fountain," Carly sighed, shrugging off her jacket. "Unsuccessfully, I might add."

"It was awesome," Sam grinned. "There was so much soap bubbles that the annoying guy who always tries to spray everyone with cologne got lost for ten whole minutes!"

"Why were you at the mall?" Freddie asked, rolling his eyes.

"Oh, Wendy needed a dress," Carly said. "You know she's going on her fourth date with Brad this weekend."

"Really? They're still together?" Freddie asked. "Huh."

"Why huh?" Carly frowned.

"You know, I just never really saw them as a couple," Freddie shrugged.

"Yeah," Sam agreed. "I mean, I'm happy _she's_ all happy now, but I just don't see how they're a couple. She's cool and spunky and he's all dorky."

"Yeah, it's a weird mix," Freddie said, putting his arm around Sam.

Carly blinked. "You-You're not serious, are you?"  
"What?" Sam asked.

"Come on, Brad and Wendy are just like you and Freddie!" Carly exclaimed. "How could you not see that? Wendy's into doing…_questionable _things, like you, Sam, and Brad's super into technology and other geeky stuff, like Freddie!"

"Okay, Carls, I think you're a little delusional," Sam chuckled. "Freddie and I are nothing like Brad and Wendy."

"Yes you are!" Carly said, exasperated.

"No, Brad's just a good friend of mine, and Wendy's a good friend of you and Sam," Freddie said.

"Yeah, and besides, they're sort of, what's the word?" Sam said. "Oh, yeah, _dysfunctional_."

"And you and Freddie are a _normal _couple?" Carly scoffed. "Last week I literally had to referee a fight between you guys about who invented the swing set!"

"It wasn't a fight, it was a discussion," Freddie corrected.

"Yeah, a discussion," Sam agreed. She stood up. "Come on, Fredwad. We're gonna miss that movie, and I wanna stop by my place real quick and grab my purse so I can sneak ribs into the theatre."

"Sam, you can't bring ribs in there again! You spilled barbecue sauce all over an usher last time!" Freddie said, hurrying after his girlfriend.

"I'm bringing my ribs!" Sam said loudly. "_And _fried chicken!"

"No! Sam, this is going to wind up being like the boat show last month!" Freddie groaned.

"Yeah, normal," Carly said, shaking her head as the couple disappeared.

…

"-And that's why that movie was the best thing ever produced," Sam was telling Freddie the next morning as the couple stood by Sam and Carly's lockers.

"No way, it was totally lame!" Freddie said as Carly came around the corner and joined them. "Carls, don't you think a movie about fighting, talking aardvarks is stupid?"

"It was the greatest thing we've laid eyes on!" Sam defended.

"Children, it's eight o'clock in the morning, I can't handle your fights right now," Carly said, opening her locker. "Or, as you would call them, _discussions_."

"Are you still bitter because we don't think we're anything like Wendy and Brad?" Freddie asked.

"Carls, just face it, we're completely different couples," Sam said.

"Why can't you two just open your eyes and see how much you guys have in common with them?" Carly asked. "I mean, it could be good for you guys to have some couple friends! Which is why _I _took the initiative to arrange a little double date for you guys at my place tonight."

"A double date?" Freddie repeated. "Carly!"

"What's the big deal?" Carly shrugged.

"We're not a dysfunctional couple like them!" Sam said.

"Well then fine," Carly said. "Then just have a nice dinner with your friends who happen to have a lot in common with you."

"I think you need a boyfriend," Sam mumbled. "You have way too much time on your hands."

"Thanks!" Carly said, crossing her arms. "Remember that little comment, Puckett, when you don't get second helpings of dinner tonight!"

…..

"Alright, pasta's cooking, garlic bread's in the oven…" Carly said, hurrying around the kitchen.

"Hey, what's going on?" Spencer asked, dragging his feet out of his bedroom, looking thoroughly depressed.

"I'm making dinner for Sam and Freddie's double date with Brad and Wendy," Carly explained. "Why do you look so glum?"

"People look glum after their ideas for Ice Cream Smoothies get shut down!" Spencer snapped.

"Ice Cream Smoothies?" Carly repeated. "Aren't those just milkshakes?"

"Yes! Yes, everyone _loves _milkshakes!" Spencer exclaimed. "Man, this is worse than the time I got poison ivy all over my-"

"Please stop talking," Carly said.

Just then the apartment door opened and Sam and Freddie came in.

"I don't care, Fredward, apples are nothing compared to oranges!" Sam said.

"Apples are way better than oranges!" Freddie retorted. "You don't have to peel an apple to eat it if you don't want to. If you want an orange, you gotta yank the dang peel off it first!"

"But then you're stuck with an apple core!"

"Better than a pile of orange peels!"

Sam gave a small chuckle.

"What?" Freddie said.

"Orange peels," Sam grinned. "Remember that _Girly Cow_ episode we watched the other day? The dog's name was Orange Peel because he only ate things that were orange?"

"I don't think I remember too much of that episode because we were too busy doing _other _things," Freddie chuckled, leaning down to kiss her.

"Yes, yes, we get it, you're an adorable couple," Carly said, hurrying over to her best friends and grabbing their wrists to lead them over to the table she had all set up. "You guys pumped for your double date?"

"Yeah, but this isn't going to prove anything," Freddie said.

"Yeah, we're not like Wendy and Brad," Sam said.

There was a knock at the door, and Carly smiled happily. "Yay, there here!" She ran to let the other couple in.

"Hey you guys!" Carly said, letting Brad and Wendy in. "Glad you can make it."

"Thanks for having us," Brad said politely.

"Just a quick question we need you to answer, though," Wendy said, shoving her coat at Brad to hang up. "Which fruit do you think is better? A banana or a watermelon?"

"Um…what?" Carly frowned.

"Wendy, there's not even an argument to make about this," Brad said, shaking his head. "Everyone knows that watermelons are the superior fruit!"

"Bananas are way better than watermelons!" Wendy argued. "To eat a watermelon you have to cut it and deseed it before you can do anything! With a banana you just peel the dang thing and you're good to go!"

"But banana peels are so dangerous," Freddie pointed out.

"Thank you!" Brad said, grinning at Freddie.

"Yeah, and so is a watermelon," Sam spoke up. "You think a banana has ever flattened anyone?"

"Thank you," Wendy said, high-fiving Sam.

"Oh come on, you know watermelons are so much better," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "That why we eat it on the Fourth of July; they're our nation's fruit!"

"People eat bananas all year long!" Sam said. "And they're one of the funniest fruits out there! Do you know how many banana jokes there are out there?"

"Oh, yeah," Brad said, chuckling. "I do like my banana jokes. There was this one I used to love when I was a kid…What do you call two banana peels?"

"A pair of slippers!" Freddie exclaimed. "I read that joke in my family friendly, toddler appropriate joke book my mom bought me a few weeks ago!"

"That's so lame," Wendy said, rolling her eyes as Brad put an arm around her.

"Totally," Sam agreed as Freddie took her hand in his. "Hey, I'm starved. Let's eat."

"Wow," Spencer said softly as the couples sat down at the table. "It's like their Sam and Freddie clones!"

"I know, right?" Carly said. "At least _somebody _sees that!"

…..

The double date went very well. The couples chatted pleasantly throughout the meal, except for a brief period where Sam and Wendy decided it was necessary to toss meatballs at their respective boyfriends. And all the while Carly beamed as she watched the four teens interact, confident that soon Sam and Freddie would have to admit that she was right about their similarities with Brad and Wendy.

"-And so then Ms. Briggs totally freaks out on me over the spray paint, and before I know it, I'm back in detention," Wendy said during desert as the couples chowed down on some strawberry shortcake.

"Sweetie, I thought you promised you weren't going to pull any more spray painting stunts," Brad sighed.

"I didn't…sort of," Wendy said. "Ms. Briggs was just on the jank today."

"Yeah, she was in a bad mood today," Sam agreed. "But that may have been because of the little hamster incident with her car…"

"No way, you did that?" Wendy laughed.

"Sam, no! You said you weren't going to put rodents in teachers' cars anymore!" Freddie moaned.

"Yeah, but you made me look at computers for three hours at the Pear Store the other day so I feel like I deserved this," Sam shrugged.

"Ugh, Brad made me look at processors the other day," Wendy said. "It was like-"

"-Being slowly tortured to death," Sam finished for her. "Believe me, I know the feeling."

"Come on, you know you had fun taking all those pictures on the computers in there," Freddie said to Sam, smiling at her from across the table.

"Hey, we did that same thing a few weeks ago," Brad said. "We should all go there together sometime and take some group pics to set as the backgrounds on all the computers."

"Definitely," Sam nodded.

"Oh, wow, Brad, it's getting late," Wendy said, looking at her watch. "I need to get home soon before my brother steals my last blueberry muffin."

"Okay," Brad said, rolling his eyes, getting up from the table. He turned to Carly. "This was a really great dinner, Carly. Thanks again for having us over. And thanks for hanging out with us, Sam and Freddie."

"No problem," Freddie smiled.

"See you tomorrow in detention," Sam added to Wendy.

"Bye!" Carly called as the couple headed out of the apartment. Once the door closed behind them, she spun back around to look at Sam and Freddie.

"Well…" she said, beaming. "Who was totally right?"

"What are you talking about?" Freddie frowned.

"You cannot still be denying that those two are pretty much your couple twins," Carly said, crossing her arms.

"Carls, I don't know how you got this idea in your head, but you need to let it go," Sam said. "They're a different type of couple. They're crazy and dysfunctional, and Fredbag and I are-"

"Hey, Sam!" Freddie said, examining his shortcake. "You took all my whipped cream from my shortcake!"

"So?" Sam shrugged. "You know I like whipped cream."

"So you can't just take mine!"

"I sort of did, baby," Sam smirked.

"Oh yeah?" Freddie said, grabbing his cake and smearing it right in Sam's face. "That's what I think of that!"

Sam quickly grabbed her own slice of cake and hurled it at Freddie. "Hey! No on throws cake at Mama!"

"That's it, come here Puckett!" Freddie exclaimed, grabbing Sam around the waist and pulling her towards him so that he was able to smush another piece of cake into her hair.

"Gross!" Sam laughed. "You know, you're lucky you look so hot covered in cake, otherwise I'd be killing you right now."

"You look pretty hot covered in cake too," Freddie grinned, leaning down to kiss her deeply.

"Okay, that does it, I'm out of here," Carly announced, grabbing her bag and heading out the door.

"Where are you going?" Sam asked as her and Freddie pulled away.

"To find me a boyfriend so I don't have to stress myself out over you two anymore," Carly said. "Later!"


	383. Chapter 383

_Internet_

"Dude, will you stop with the pacing?" Sam moaned as Freddie kept walking in front of the T.V. "I'm trying to watch a show, here!"

"Oh, well it's so nice that my girlfriend can enjoy herself when I'm about to meet my death!" Freddie snapped.

"Oh come on, don't be dramatic," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Sam," Carly sighed from the kitchen, where she was pouring herself some iced tea. "What did we say about being respectful of your boyfriend's feelings?"

"Well he's being a Drama Queen!" Sam defended. "Even you have to admit that!"

"Well how am I supposed to act when I have _hours _left to live?" Freddie exclaimed.

"Baby, for the millionth time, you're going to be fine," Sam said. "You're not having brain surgery or anything."

"Doctors are going to be going through my head and putting tubes in my ear!" Freddie cried.

"Well then maybe you should stop getting ear infections," Sam shrugged.

"You see this?" Freddie said, turning to Carly.

"Well Freddie, maybe you _are_ being a little…paranoid," Carly said slowly.

"Ha! She sides with me!" Sam said triumphantly.

"I still say being supportive is something that you need to work on," Carly said. "But, um, Freddie…it _is _a routine procedure."

"It's surgery!" Freddie pointed out. "Why am I the only one who seems to understand this? Huh?"

"Because you're the only one who's psycho," Sam said, getting to her feet to give him a peck on the lips. "Come on, Fredbear, it's not that big of a deal. Little kids have this done to them all the time! They get tiny tubes shoved up their ears, and then they stop getting ear infections. Easy. You're not even conscious during it!"

"Seriously, Freddie, you're going to be fine," Carly said, patting his shoulder. "And we'll be right there waiting for you when you get out of surgery."

"Well, there _is _this MMA fight that's on around two-" Sam began.

"We'll be there," Carly repeated firmly. "No matter what violent television show is on!"

Just then the Shay's apartment door burst open and Marissa Benson stormed in.

"Freddie! There you are!" she said. "What do you think you're doing over here? You have an extremely dangerous surgery tomorrow! We need to get you well rested and pumped with antibiotics to even give you a fighting chance on that operating table! Oh, I can't believe my poor baby's going to be cut into."

"Mrs. Benson, Freddie and you don't have anything to worry about," Carly said. "The doctors at the hospital have done this procedure a million times and-"

"Quiet, Sassy Skirt!" Marissa snapped.

"Wow, aren't you on the jank," Sam mumbled.

"Excuse me, but at least I'm not the one who caused my Freddikin's condition!" Marissa said, glaring at Sam.

"How did I cause him to have ten thousand ear infections?" Sam frowned.

"Because you refuse to let me sanitize you before you enter our home!" Marissa said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Sam opened her mouth to respond, but Carly quickly elbowed her in the ribs before she could do so.

"Come on," Marissa said, grabbing Freddie's wrist.

"See, _this _is concern!" Freddie called over his shoulder as he was dragged out by his mother.

"Then date her!" Sam smirked.

"You know, we can't really blame Freddie too much for his weird fear of hospitals," Carly said as they door closed again. "I mean, he did grow up with Mrs. Benson…"

"Eh, he'll get over it," Sam said.

"Sam," Carly said seriously. "Freddie _is _your boyfriend. Don't you think you should be just a tiny bit more understanding. He's obviously freaked out."

"Ugh, why is everyone on my case about this?" Sam moaned. "You want me to buy him a smoothie or something for after his stupid surgery? Fine!"

"I just think that it would be, you know, _nice_, if Freddie thought that you were concerned about him during his surgery," Carly shrugged. "I know it's not a big deal or anything, but I think he'd really appreciate it."

"I'm concerned about how paranoid he is," Sam mumbled, rolling his eyes.

….

"Hey, look!" Spencer said, running back into the hospital waiting room, where, Sam, Carly, and Mrs. Benson were sitting, waiting for Freddie's surgery to be done. He held up two Jell-O cups. "They just left these unattended in the cafeteria! I have six stuffed in my pockets!"

"Why?" Carly frowned. "We have that stuff at home."

"But this is hospital brand," Spencer pointed out. "It's different!"

"How?" Carly asked, amused.

"It's…cleaner?" Spencer said lamely.

"Will you two please stop discussing sugary foods?" Marissa snapped, gripping her handbag tightly.

"Um, Mrs. Benson, you okay there?" Spencer asked.

"No, I'm not okay, dummy!" she retorted. "My precious baby boy is being tampered with!"

"Did she just call me a dummy?" Spencer frowned.

"Oh, all this stress is making my rash come back," Marissa sighed, getting to her feet. "I'll be back after I apply a few precautionary layers of ointment to it."

"Wow, she's a basket case!" Spencer said as Mrs. Benson hurried off to the restrooms.

"Well what else did you expect?" Carly sighed. "I'm just surprised she hasn't tried to use her status as a nurse here to try and run back to the operating room, right Sam. Sam?"

She turned to look at her best friend, who was silently sitting in her chair, fiddling with her thumbs.

"Yo, Puckett?" Carly said, gently shaking her shoulder. "You with us?"

"Huh, oh, yeah," Sam nodded.

"You okay?" Spencer asked.

"Yeah," Sam mumbled.

"Sam…" Carly said knowingly.

"It's just," Sam sighed. "I was looking around on the Internet a little last night, about this little surgery thing Freddie's having, and I sort of saw some things…"

"What things?" Carly questioned.

"Well like how about 98 percent of people who get this done are perfectly fine but then there are like two percent who have to stay in the hospital after because of infections or something," Sam said. "What if…what if Freddie's part of that two percent? And he had to get anesthesia too. What if something went wrong with that and he just doesn't wake up? Or what if the doctor messes something up? Or what if they find something else wrong with him while they're in there? Or what if-"

"Whoa, whoa, Sam, calm down!" Carly said to the now anxious blonde. "None of that is going to happen."

"What if it does?" Sam demanded. "Then what? Huh? Didn't they say this was only supposed to take three hours? Its been three hours, fourteen minutes and thirty-eight seconds already! Something must be wrong, otherwise they wouldn't be taking so long, right?"

"Sam, nothing's wrong," Carly assured her. "Look, I know how much you love Freddie, and how much you would hate it if something happened, but it's like you've been saying this whole time; this procedure's totally safe and-"

"Oh what do I know!" Sam snapped. "Am I a doctor? No! So if I want to freak out about this, then I'm going to-"

"Is this Fredward Benson's party?" a young nurse asked, approaching the group.

"Yeah, is he okay?" Sam replied at once, jumping to her feet.

"He just woke up and has been asking for someone named Sam," the nurse nodded. "So if you three are ready, I can-"

But Sam was already running past her towards the hallway where the hospital rooms were. She searched until she found the door with her boyfriend's name on it and then burst in.

"Sam!" Freddie said from his hospital bed. "Hey, I'm glad you-"

But Sam had already rushed over to the bed and thrown her arms around him and pressed her lips to his passionately.

"Hey to you too," Freddie grinned when the couple pulled apart.

"How are you feeling?" Sam asked.

"I feel fine, Sam," Freddie told her. "I think you were right about me overreacting earlier. This really was no big deal."

"Well do you feel dizzy at all?" Sam asked. "Hungry? Thirsty? Does anything hurt? Did the doctors look like they had a clue what they were doing? Did-"

"Jeez, Sam, I think you nearly took out a nurse's cart running back here," Spencer commented as him and Carly finally reached the room.

"Seriously," Carly said, clutching her side as she caught her breath. "You feel okay, Freddie?"

"Perfect," Freddie smiled as Sam hopped up onto the bed next to him. He wrapped his arms around her.

"You sure?" Sam asked.

"Positive," Freddie nodded. "And what happened to this being a tiny little surgery? You're sure freaking out a lot."

"Just enjoy it while it lasts," Sam said, giving him another quick kiss.

Suddenly, though, the hospital room door slammed open and Mrs. Benson came running in.

"Why did no one come tell me that my Freddie was finally awake?" she exclaimed, hurrying over to the bed and flinging her arms around her son, pushing Sam out of the way in the process.

"Mom! Mom! Can't breathe!" Freddie gasped.

"Don't you worry, I'm going to double up on my germ annihilation in the apartment," Marissa said. She turned to look at Sam, who was getting to her feet. "This is what a boy needs, Samantha. Someone who _cares_ about him. Someone who doesn't brush off a horrible, horrible surgery!"

Sam opened her mouth to respond, but Spencer beat her to it.

"Mrs. Benson," he frowned. "Sam cares about Freddie a lot. You should've seen her when you left for the bathroom a few minutes ago; she was so scared for Freddie; I've never seen her like that before. She loves him so much, and she was sitting in that waiting room trying to hold herself together even though this was such a small surgery."

"You were really that worried?" Freddie asked softly.

Sam gave a small shrug. "Maybe a little…"

"Yeah, Mrs. Benson, I really don't think it's fair of you to say that Sam doesn't care about Freddie like that," Carly agreed. "And I know you and her don't really see eye to eye on well, anything, but this is the one thing you have in common with each other: caring about Freddie. So don't you think you should use that and try to grow closer to each other?"

Sam and Mrs. Benson stared at each other for a moment, and then, slowly, Mrs. Benson moved a tiny bit on the bed to make room for Sam to sit as well.

Sam gave a small nod and sat down next to her and Freddie took her hand.


	384. Chapter 384

**AN-Hey, so this chapter is sort of a sequel to chapter 367, where Carly and Sam were preparing for a test in college and Sam talked to Freddie about his exam over a web chat. **

…**.**

_Crown_

"Oh man, oh man, oh man," Carly mumbled as she nervously paced back and forth in her and Sam's shared dorm room.

"What are you freaking out about?" Sam asked, looking up from her Pearpad.

"The grades from our first Sociology test are going to be posted in five minutes," Carly replied.

"Yeah…and?"

"Sam, that was our first college exam ever!" Carly pointed out. "How we do on it is going to determine for the rest of our time here! Plus, it counts as thirty percent of our overall Sociology grade, _and _if we did well on it, it could put us on Professor Dankum's good side for the rest of the semester."

"He smells weird, I don't want to be on any side of him," Sam said.

Just then her Pearpad beeped and a chat window popped up.

"Oh, it's Freddie!" Sam said excitedly, pushing the accept button. Her boyfriend's face popped up on her Pearpad. "Hey, baby!"

"Hey Princess," Freddie smiled. "What's up?"

"Nothing, just watching Carly have a panic attack," Sam said. "It's a real raging Friday night."

"Four minutes!" Carly announced, ignoring her friend's comment.

"Four minutes until what?" Freddie frowned.

"Until our Sociology teacher puts up our grades from our first exam," Sam explained.

"Oh wow, that's pretty big," Freddie said.

"It's just a test," Sam shrugged.

"Well how do you think you did on it?" Freddie asked.

"I didn't stick gum on it like I did in high school," Sam said proudly.

"That's…good," Freddie said.

"Yeah, I guess," Sam nodded. "But come on, baby, both of us know that I'm not going to do any better on tests here in college than I did in high school. I just hope I passed it."

"You probably did fine, Sam," Freddie said. "You're so much smarter than you give yourself credit for, I keep telling you that."

"Dude, I'm not going to suddenly become a genius," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I'm not like you and Carly."

"But you studied for this exam, didn't you?"

"Sort of, the night before," Sam mumbled. "I read the chapters and stuff…"

"Well there you go, that's more than you ever did for any other test," Freddie pointed out.

"Oh my God!" Carly exclaimed. "It's time! The grades are up!"

"Keep your pants on, Carls," Sam said, rolling her eyes as Carly dove for her computer.

"No way!" Carly grinned. "I got an 88!"

"Nice job, kid," Sam said, high fiving her. "Told you, you had nothing to worry about."

"Congratulations, Carls," Freddie said from the Pearpad.

"Thanks," Carly said, still beaming. "I'll have to call Spencer later and tell him." She glanced over to Sam. "Um, Sam? You-You want to check too?"

"Not particularly," Sam sighed, grabbing Carly's laptop. "But I know if I don't, you two will keep hounding me until I do…"

"Hey, Sam, the important thing to remember here is that you actually studied for this," Freddie said as he watched Sam type a few things onto Carly's laptop. "Which is definitely a step in the right direction for you. Don't worry too much about the actual grade that-"

"Holy chiz!" Sam cried, nearly dropping the laptop as she covered her mouth with her hands in shock. "I got a 91!"

"Sam!" Carly squealed, throwing her arms around her. "That's an A! I'm so proud of you! You got an A on your first college exam ever! Do you know what this means?"

"That I can sleep through the rest of the lectures for this class now?" Sam suggested.

"I was going to say that you were on your way to getting a really good GPA at the end of the semester," Carly sighed.

Sam rolled her eyes. "One step at a time, Carls."

She looked back down at her Pearpad at her boyfriend's smiling face.

"Sam…that's incredible," Freddie said. "I wish I was there right now to celebrate this with you."

"You get A's all the time," Sam mumbled, her cheeks reddening a bit. "It's one test."

"Sam, baby, come on, just because you didn't get the best grades in high school doesn't mean that it has to be the same way in college," Freddie told her. "You just proved that you can do this. This is amazing, you deserve a crown or something."

"Let's go out and celebrate!" Carly said excitedly.

"Yeah, go have fun, Sam, you really earned it," Freddie nodded.

"You guys are acting like I won a Nole Prize," Sam said.

"Um, it-it's Nobel," Carly corrected. "But who cares? You just aced this test, Puckett, now get pumped!"

"Fine, we'll go out tonight," Sam sighed, rolling her eyes.

"Yay, let me just go take a quick shower first," Carly smiled.

"You know," Sam said to Freddie as Carly ran out of the room. "Don't be expecting A's from me all the time now."

"As long as you do your best," Freddie replied.

"We'll see," Sam smirked.

"Come on, you can't tell me it doesn't feel real good right now, knowing you did so well," Freddie said knowingly.

"I guess it does feel sort of…different to be on this side of the curve," Sam admitted.

"Exactly," Freddie nodded.

"Yeah well, I better start getting all dolled up since Carly's dragging me out," Sam said. "And by dolled up, I mean I'm gonna spend an hour eating beef jerky while I attempt to paint my nails."

"Of course," Freddie grinned. "Well, I'll let you go then. I love you."

"Love you too," Sam replied.

"And you know how proud I am of you, right?"

Sam gave him a small smile. "You know how nubbish you are, right?"


	385. Chapter 385

**AN-Hey, so this oneshot is a little on the rated T side I'd say, just because the content's a tad bit more mature than what most of these oneshots are. Hope you like it still!**

_Race_

"You know the best thing about having an apartment?" Carly asked, coming into the living room of her and Sam's shared apartment. "Not having to share a shower with a whole dorm of girls. I'm sorry, but forty girls to three showers? That's just torture as far as I'm concerned."

"Huh? Oh, um, yeah," Sam nodded, looking over at her from the couch.

"And I mean, this apartment is just so great," Carly continued. "It's really close to campus, so we can still get to our classes quickly, it's not too expensive, and it's _huge_. I'm telling you Sam, we're really cut out for this life."

"Yeah," Sam mumbled.

"Hey, so after my Anthropology class, I was going to run and get some Chinese food for dinner," Carly continued, clearly in too good of a mood to notice her roommate's less-than-enthusiastic behavior. "That good for you?"

"Sure," Sam said.

"Awesome," Carly said happily, pulling on her jacket. "I'll see you later then!"

Sam waited until the apartment door slammed shut before she leaned back in her seat, covering her face in her hands and letting out a long sigh.

She felt so jealous of Carly right now. Right now her biggest worry was getting to that Anthropology class on time. Her, on the other hand, had much bigger things on her mind…

She slowly reached into her back pocket and pulled out the small pregnancy test that she had taken just that morning, the little pink plus sign starting up at her.

It was the fifth test she had taken in a matter of two days, and it had yielded the same results as all the rest. It looked like it was official.

She was pregnant.

She could feel the tears welling up in her eyes, and she didn't even know if they were from the hormones that she knew were currently running crazy through her body or if they were from her actual emotions.

How could this have happened?

Well, that was easy. She knew exactly _how _this had happened. And when too.

Freddie had come to visit her from MIT about a month ago, and after not seeing each other for far too long, they wasted no time in picking up where they had left off during his last visit…

They had been so careful though. And it wasn't as if this was their first time; they both knew what they were doing, and Sam had been so sure that with all the percussions they had taken that there could be no chance of this happening. It hadn't even crossed her mind…

But yet here she was. She was barely twenty, just starting her third year in college, had no job and no money, and was pregnant with her and Freddie's child.

Freddie…He still didn't know.

Sam wiped her eyes on her sleeve.

_The sooner I do this, the better_, she decided firmly, grabbing her laptop from the coffee table and setting up her webcam. _Maybe after I actually tell someone I won't feel so horrible._

She wondered how Freddie would take the news…He would be freaked out, obviously. She was too. She was freaked out, shocked, scared, and a whole flood of other emotions when she had taken her first test yesterday. She just hoped he wouldn't be mad at her…

She pulled up the web chat window and a few seconds later Freddie's beaming face appeared on her computer screen.

"Sam!" he said happily. "I was just about to send you a chat request!"

"Oh," Sam nodded. "Well, um, guess-guess I saved you some time then. Um, baby? Listen, I-I need to-"

"Guess what?" Freddie cut her off, still smiling widely.

"What?"

"I just heard back from this amazing internship program I applied for a few months back," Freddie told her. "The one with the Pear Company! In just six months I will be spending ten weeks working with some of the top software developers there working on all these new updates and all sorts of cool tech stuff!"

"W-Wow," Sam said, pulling on a smile as she felt her heart sink. "That's-That's-"

"Oh, and there's more," Freddie continued. "My old professor from last semester was so impressed with my work in his class that he's going to make me a TA for his class! Can you believe that? Usually only graduate students get to do stuff like that, and he offered the position to _me _a junior in my undergrad!"

_He's going to hate me_, Sam thought to herself, looking at Freddie's excited face. _There's no way he's going to want to deal with me and a baby now. Not with all of this stuff he has going for him._

"Baby, this is going to be my year, I can feel it," Freddie said, grinning.

"I'm really proud of you," Sam said shakily, trying not to break down once again. "I-I really-g-good job-"

"Sam?" Freddie frowned as Sam began to cry for the second time in less than ten minutes. "Sam? What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Sam sniffed as tears continued to flow from her eyes. "I-I'm fine."

"Sam…" Freddie said knowingly, his voice full of concern. "Please, you know you can talk to me."

"You'll hate me," Sam whispered.

Freddie blinked. "Sam," he said firmly. "There's no way I could ever hate you. Now _please_, tell me what's going on. I can help you. Whatever it is I'm sure isn't so bad that-"

"I'm pregnant," she said softly.

Freddie's mouth dropped, and for a moment, he stayed absolutely silent.

"You-You're-" Freddie finally managed to stutter. "I-But-Um, w-what?"

"I'm pregnant," Sam said again.

"I-Oh-w-what-oh…oh…uh-" Freddie said weakly, his eyes widening. "But-But-Are you-Are you _sure_? I mean, Sam, there-there's a chance that this is just a mistake, right? I mean, pregnancy tests and all those things aren't exactly entirely accurate all the time, so maybe-"

"I took five tests," Sam told him. "And they all were positive. I'm really pregnant."

"O-Oh," Freddie said simply, looking as though he was just slapped in the face.

"Freddie, I'm so sorry," Sam said, still crying. "I'm so sorry. I know that-"

"Sam, don't-don't be sorry," Freddie said, still looking shocked. "It-It takes _two_ people to make a baby…"

"I know, but…this can't be what you were expecting when you saw my web chat," Sam mumbled.

"N-No," Freddie admitted. "But, um, S-Sam…how-how did this-I-We used a-and you were on the-are you really, _really _sure?"

"Yes," Sam nodded. "I'm positive, Freddie."

"Ah," Freddie said softly.

"Look…I'm sorry I just laid all this on you," Sam said after another silence fell between them. "I know having this, um, _discussion_ via webcam isn't exactly something we planned. But, um, just-just don't worry about it right now. Just focus on all your stuff going on at MIT right now and I'll worry about this. I-I guess I'll tell Carly later today, and then I should probably go see a doctor or something, right? And-And then I don't know, but I'll figure it out, and-"

"Sam, I'm not going to just leave you all the way across the country pregnant with our child while I sit down here at school," Freddie cut her off. "Absolutely not. I'm going to be there for you. Through all of this. Listen, if I sit in coach, I can probably get a flight out to Washington in a few hours, and then I-I'll just crash in your place again until I can find somewhere else. And-And well, maybe I can get a job without a full college degree that will be able to support you and the baby, or I can try and get a temporary job while I take some classes at a community college or something, or maybe I can-"

"Dude, no, this is exactly what I _didn't _want to happen," Sam moaned. "You're going to race back up here and leave all of those great things you've got going for you at MIT just because I screwed up-"

"Sam, this isn't just on you!" Freddie said. "How do you think you _got _pregnant? This is on me too! This is my baby too! I'm not going to be some guy that just leaves you alone to deal with this! I _love _you. Nothing can ever change that. Things are going to be…different, now, but that doesn't mean we can't get through them."

"It doesn't mean you have to be the one to drop everything to take care of us either!" Sam retorted. "I don't want you to have to give up everything you've worked for! You've dreamed of getting into MIT since you were a toddler! And you've worked so hard these past years to make sure you were amazing there! You've got everything going for you and I don't want to be the one who yanks it all away from you!"

"Well what about you?" Freddie pointed out. "Huh? You think you can handle this on your own? You've worked hard too, Sam. You've done _well _in college. You're telling me you'd be perfectly okay with just forgetting about all the hard work _you've _put in at Washington State?"

"I-I don't-I'd get over it," Sam told him.

"Sam, you always do this," Freddie said gently. "You never want to admit that you need help. You can't do everything for yourself. And this time…you're not the only one in the equation."

"I-I just don't even know what to do," Sam whispered. "I'm scared, Freddie. I don't want to do this on my own, but-but you can't just throw everything aside because of this."

"Sam, when will you get it?" Freddie asked. "As much as I love MIT and everything it has done for me, it comes second to you. _You're _the most important thing in my life. And-And I know that we didn't plan for this. We're not ready for a baby. But…well, we-we've just got to…accept this."

"I know," Sam said. "But I'm still scared."

"I'm scared too," Freddie said. "Terrified, actually."

"We're not ready, like you said," Sam said, grabbing a few tissues. "We're only twenty. Neither of us have jobs, we don't know how to raise a baby…what do we do?"

"I don't know," Freddie said truthfully. "I-I really don't. But I promise you, I'm going to be there for you."

Those words definitely made Sam feel a little better; knowing that Freddie wasn't furious and going to leave her for messing up his life. Still, though, she felt far from okay.

"How are we going to do this?" she asked again. "How can we…How can we have a baby?"

"Well, Sam, we-we are adults now," Freddie reasoned, but Sam could tell by his face that he wasn't buying what he was saying himself. "It's not like we're two kids in high school. We're twenty, and-"

"-And we barely know any more about the real world than we did when we were sixteen," Sam said. "We don't have any money of our own. Your mom pays for your dorm at MIT, Carly's dad pays for this apartment, I have a bunch of loans just to pay for my books and stuff."

"I told you, maybe I can find a job or something," Freddie said. "It's going to probably be hard the first few years, but once we get everything settled in a few years… And-And maybe our parents will help us out some."

"My mom can barely afford to pay for herself," Sam reminded him. "And don't you think that _your _mom is going to be ready to kill us once she hears about this?"

"Maybe at first," Freddie agreed. "But I sort of think once she wraps her mind around the fact that she's going to be a grandma, she'll be on board."

Sam gave a small chuckled.

"I guess I can look for a job too," she added. "I think I saw a sign in the college bookstore the other day that said it was hiring. I'll have to deal with people, but I can suck it up."

"You don't have to-"

"Freddie, I'm not going to let you do everything!" Sam said firmly.

"Well, I'm still coming down there," Freddie said. "Tonight."

"Okay," Sam nodded, happy that she would at least be seeing him soon. "But seriously, baby, don't get in your head that you have to give up MIT. I-I can always move up there and figure out what to do there too."

"We'll get through this," Freddie said gently. "I promise. We'll get through this together."


	386. Chapter 386

**AN-Really sorry I haven't updated in awhile. I've just been really busy with classes and everything. But considering I'm sort of sick and can't do anything this weekend, hopefully I'll be able to catch up on my writing a little. Anyway, this chapter is a sequel to chapter 369, where Sam asked Freddie to go on a ski trip with her and her mom. **

…**.**

_Psychiatrist_

"So what did you tell your mom again?" Sam asked as Freddie helped her cram a few pairs of boots into her suitcase in her bedroom.

"That I was going on a school-sponsored trip with the Young Men Against Bacterial Infections club she thinks I'm a part of," Freddie said proudly. "So that I can learn about all the dangers of an unreliable laundry detergent. But little does she know that for the next three days, I am going to be having the time of my life enjoying a ski trip with my wonderful girlfriend."

"How awesome is this going to be?" Sam grinned, standing on her toes to give him a quick kiss.

"Very," Freddie chuckled. "Your mom's seriously the best for agreeing to let you bring me along to this ski lodge. See, at least with _your _mom, we don't have to worry about her freaking out on us about us being together this weekend. She'll let us be, unlike my mom, who would probably sew my gloves to hers'."

"At least you wouldn't have to remind your mom that bathing suits in the hot tub at lodge aren't _optional_," Sam pointed out. "But yeah, I guess you're right. She won't care _what_ we do down there."

"Sam!" the couple suddenly heard Pam Puckett call from downstairs.

"What?" Sam yelled back, not realizing how close she was to her boyfriend's ear.

"Down here, now!"

"Ugh, she probably got her foot stuck in another jar," Sam moaned, rolling her eyes.

"You want me to help?" Freddie asked.

"No, you just stay up here and try to figure out how many of my Fat Cakes you can jam into my bag," Sam replied. "I'll be back in a minute."

Sam headed downstairs into the cluttered living room of the Puckett house.

"What?" Sam asked her mom. "I thought we weren't leaving for the lodge for another hour."

"Just sit and give me a second," Pam said, looking through a pile on the coffee table. "Now where did I put it…ah-ha!"

"Wait," Sam frowned. "Is that a _book_?"

"And a darn good sausage plate too," Pam said as she opened up the book she had just found, a grease stain visible on the cover.

"Why are _you _reading a book?" Sam asked, confused. "Do you even know how to read?"

"Hey! Who do you think read through all your Juvie forms?" Pam said indignantly.

"_Oh_-kay," Sam said, shaking her head, deciding it was best not to question her mother's odd behavior. "Well, if you aren't going to make me pull your foot out of a jar, I'm just gonna go back up to Freddie, and-"

"Not so fast!" Pam barked as Sam made to get up. "Benson's the whole reason for this little chit-chat."

"What are you talking about? What did Freddie do?" Sam asked. "And hey! Is that-That's a _parenting _book?"

"Yeah, I got it at a garage sale back when you and Melanie were younger," Pam said, still flipping through the book. "But then Melanie started getting accepted into all these top-notch preschools and winning awards, so I figured I didn't need it since she was doing so well and you were probably going to wind up just like her. Man was _I _wrong about that."

"Thanks," Sam said spitefully. "But don't you think six months before I turn eighteen is a _little _late to be breaking that thing out?"

"Here's that chapter!" Pam said finally, ignoring her daughter's last comment. "Alright, kid, now that you've gone and found yourself a hot piece of guy-"

"You've _got _to be kidding me," Sam mumbled, rolling her eyes.

"-And you've obviously got _those feelings-_"

"Are we really doing this?" Sam cut her off. "Look, I don't know what sort of 'happy pills' your psychiatrist has you loaded up on right now, but I'm just gonna go finish getting packed-"

"No one's packing anything until you and I get a few things straight for this weekend," Pam said.

Sam frowned. Her mother actually seemed sort of…firm and authoritative right now, two things Pam Puckett generally wasn't. When it came to parenting, she was more on the "relaxed" side.

"Um…like what?" Sam asked. "Don't worry, Freddie and I won't stop you from talking up rich skiers there on vacation. We'll just do our own thing together and-"

"Will you pipe down and let me parent here?" Pam snapped, looking down at the book in her hands. "Alright, rule number one!"

"_Rules_?" Sam repeated.

"You and Muscle Boy have an midnight curfew this trip," Pam said, again, ignoring Sam's comment.

"Midnight?" Sam exclaimed. "But there's supposed to be this haunted ski trail I was going to drag Freddie to! It won't be scary if we go _before _midnight."

"Rule number two!" Pam continued. "Sleeping arrangements: I get one bed, you _or _Hunky get the second bed. Not both of you, _one _of you."

"Well there's no way I'm sleeping on the couch," Sam muttered. "But why do you have to be so-"

"Rule number three!" Pam went on. "If I find out that you and Arm Boy-"

"Ugh! Just call him _Freddie_, will you?" Sam cringed.

"-If I find out that either of you _do _anything on this trip, you're-you're what's that word for when you discipline your kid? Oh right, grounded," Pam said.

"What? Since when do you care what me and Freddie do?" Sam cried.

"Because I know what happens on ski trips!" Pam said. "And I'm not about to have my kid making mistakes like I did! Well, other than the whole 'jail thing'."

"But-But this is stupid!" Sam argued loudly. "You can't just decide to ruin this trip for us!"

"Yeah I can, I'm a parent!" Pam said, thumping her chest triumphantly.

"Barely," Sam mumbled as she turned to head back upstairs and into her room where Freddie was trying to jam a box of Fat Cakes into her suitcase.

"Sam, maybe you should take out some of these hot sauce bottles," Freddie said. "Or the ham."

"No, I'll just take out one of these stupid scarves," Sam said hotly, shoving him aside so she could attend to her suitcase.

"Um, you okay?" Freddie asked, sensing Sam's tone.

"No," Sam snapped. "My mom decided to pick _now _to become a concerned parent and has basically destroyed this trip now."

"Wait, she's not going to let me come with you guys?" Freddie asked.

"No, you can still come," Sam sighed. "But she's not letting us go out after midnight, _you _have to sleep on the uncomfortable couch instead of sharing a bed with me, and she'll probably come up with a million more stupid rules on the way up there. Can you believe her?"

"Wait, _that's _how you think your mom's ruining this trip?" Freddie asked, amused. "Sam, that's not ruining it."

"What do you mean?" Sam snapped. "She's being all-all-and she's-"

"She's _parenting_?" Freddie suggested. "Baby, isn't that a _good _thing? I mean, you've been saying for ages how you've sort of wanted your mom to show she cares a little more?"

"I've _never _said that," Sam said, crossing her arms.

"Well you say it without saying it," Freddie reasoned. "You know, in the way you talk about your mom sometimes."

"I say it without saying it?" Sam repeated. "See, _this _is why people call you the chick in this relationship. Look, can't you just be wazzed off with me about my mom being completely bonkers right now?"

"Sam, she's actually not being that unreasonable," Freddie said gently. "I mean, she's letting us spend time together, so long as we're back in by midnight, and I have no problem sleeping on the couch. Come on, you know that if this was _my _mom we were talking about, and we _somehow _got her to agree to let us go on this trip together with her, she'd want to be with us every second. See, at least with your mom, she's giving us some freedom."

"Are you _defending _her?"

"Sam, she's obviously being stricter with you right now because she cares about you," Freddie said, taking her hand. "And you've got to admit, even though your mom has always cared about you, it's refreshing to see her show it."

"But did she _have _to pick this week to start?" Sam groaned.

"Hey, we'll still have fun," Freddie smiled, wrapping his arms around her. "We're still gonna go skiing, and sit by the fireplace and drink hot chocolate, and relax in the hot tub…"

"You're just happy this means I can't drag you to that haunted ski trail," Sam pointed out.

"Maybe," Freddie grinned.

…..

"I'm the champion!" Sam laughed a few days later as her and Freddie ran back to the ski lodge where they were staying along with Sam's mom. It was near midnight, and the couple had just finished enjoying their last day at the lodge before they would be returning home to Seattle. "Face it, Benson, I _destroyed _you in that snowball fight."

"Yeah, and you destroyed almost every bone in my body too," Freddie winced, massaging his shoulder.

Sam laughed and leaned up to give him a quick kiss. "You'll live."

"Your sympathy's always nice," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"I'm really gonna miss it here," Sam sighed, looking out at the slopes.

"We can come again," Freddie reminded her.

"Yeah, I'm holding you to that," Sam chuckled.

"And see, I told you this would be a fun trip," Freddie continued. "Your mom didn't ruin it for us."

"Yeah, yeah," Sam said.

"Speaking of which, we should get inside," Freddie said, looking at his watch. "It's already 12:15. Besides, I'm freezing, since _somebody _took my scarf and threw it at a ski instructor!"

"He almost ran over the Fat Cake that fell out of my pocket!" Sam defended. "What was I supposed to do? _Thank _him?"

The couple walked into the lodge, where Pam Puckett was sitting on the couch, clipping her toenails into a teacup.

"Um, h-hey Mrs. Puckett," Freddie said, trying to seem to grossed out by his girlfriend's mother's activity.

"Shh! Don't ruin my concentration!" Pam hissed, getting ready to clip her last toenail. "I've had a perfect record so far, and I don't need to mess it up now…"

She clipped the toenail and it flew right into the teacup.

"Yeah! Ten for ten! Whoo!" Pam cheered.

"Um, well, c-congratulations," Freddie said, looking as though he might throw up. "Er, I-I think I'm gonna go take a shower and try to erase this whole thing from my memory."

"That boy needs a stronger stomach," Pam commented as Sam kicked off her boots.

"Pfft, no kidding," Sam agreed, sitting down next to her. She looked down at her lap. "Um, sorry Freddie and I got back a little after midnight. We sort of lost track of time and-"

"Eh, don't worry about it," Pam shrugged.

"Oh," Sam nodded. "Thanks." And then she let out a sigh. "Um, so, I-I guess I'm sort of, you know…s-s-sorry, about giving you hard time about everything before we left for this trip. You didn't ruin it. Freddie and I actually enjoyed it."

"Well you better make the most of the few hours you two have here before we leave tomorrow because due to a certain incident at the buffet, the lodge has decided to ban us from coming back here for the next five years," Pam replied.

"Wait, is that why it was closed for dinner?" Sam frowned. "What did you _do_?"

"You know the drill, kid. I can't tell you anything until after I clear it up with my lawyer first."

"Right," Sam chuckled. She cleared her throat. "Um, anyway, I-um, thanks. You know, for-for being sort of…motherly, this trip."

"Had to make up for lost time, didn't I?" Pam pointed out, looking through her teacup of toenails. "Hey, there's only nine in here! Where's my tenth toenail?"

Sam laughed and gave her mother the first hug the two had exchanged in quite some time.


	387. Chapter 387

**AN-This oneshot takes place after iStage an Intervention, when Freddie sent Sam the fake text message from Gary Wolf.**

…**.**

_Fan_

How could this day get any better?

Fourteen-year old Freddie Benson had a spring in his step and a wide smile etched on his face as he hopped off the bus that he had taken from Bushwell Plaza to the nearby mall.

His mom had actually allowed him to take public transportation without accompanying him and trying to tie his wrist to her child leach, Carly had given him the most _perfect _smile just one hour ago, _and _it seemed as if he had finally one-upped Sam Puckett, the tormentor of his life.

He still couldn't believe he had managed to get even with Sam for trying to make it seem as though he was really cursed by some lame old chain email. Really, it was a bit pathetic when you thought about it. How could anybody actually buy into a curse like that? Sam should've known that Freddie would figure out her little ploy sooner or later.

But his revenge, on the other hand, was nothing short of genius. He had craftily hacked into Gary Wolf's phone all the way from his apartment and sent Sam a fake text claiming that Gary wanted to meet her at the mall.

"She's gonna get it good," Freddie chuckled to himself as he walked into the mall. "She's gonna be so mad…"

Freddie walked past the many shops and various kiosks, craning his neck in search of the blonde. He finally spotted her sitting alone at a small table in the food court, impatiently tapping her foot.

_Man, I wonder how she'll react when she figures out Gary isn't going to show up, _Freddie thought triumphantly to himself. _She'll probably break that table in half…Hopefully she won't break any of Gary's bones tomorrow at school, but still, if she can take out that guy too, that will just-_

Suddenly a loud, laughing group walked past Freddie into the food court and Freddie's eyes widened when he saw that Gary Wolf was leading the pack and that they were all heading right towards Sam.

It looked like things _could _get better.

Silently congratulating himself, Freddie quickly snuck through the food court and ducked behind a potted plant a few feet away from Sam's table.

As Gary's group drew nearer, Sam looked up and grinned.

"Hey, Gary!" she called just as the group walked past the table.

Gary stopped and turned around to look at her, clearly not realizing he had just zoomed past her.

"Oh, um, hey," he replied. "It's Sam, right?"

"Er, yeah," Sam said. "Anyway, how are you?"

"Good," Gary said slowly, a bit confused.

"Oh, well…great," Sam smiled. "So, um, what-what do you want to do? I never really pinned you as a guy who liked to hang out at the mall. I mean, um, it-it's totally cool that you do, and I mean hey, there's plenty to do-"

"Sorry, but what are you talking about?" Gary frowned.

"You-You sent me a text saying that you wanted to hang out at the mall," Sam replied. "I mean…you-you _did _text me that, didn't you?"

_This is it_! Freddie thought to himself from behind the potted plant. _You, Freddie Benson, are a __**genius**__!_

"Um, I didn't text you," Gary said awkwardly. "Er, sorry, but I think you've made a mistake or something."

"Oh," Sam said quickly, her face falling. "Well, um, c-cool, that's just-Well then I should get going. I'm pretty busy anyway, and I was just gonna-"

"Hey, wait a minute, you're from iCarly, aren't you?" one of Gary's friends spoke up.

"Yeah, why?" Sam shrugged.

"Well you're friends with Carly Shay then, aren't you?" the boy said. "Do you think you could set me up with her? Huh? Do you?"

"Dude, not cool!" Gary exclaimed, thumping his friend's head. "You know I was planning on asking out Shay next week!"

"What? I told you I wanted to ask her out!" Gary's second friend pointed out.

"Well too bad, I'm asking her out," Gary said firmly.

"No, I called dibs!"

"I stomped your dibs!"

"You can't stomp dibs!"

"Um, Carly's actually getting surgery in France next week so she can't really date," Sam said, grabbing her bag. "But, um…later."

"And that's how Benson's get event," Freddie said to himself, getting to his feet as he watched the back of Sam's head disappear out of the food court. "Maybe from now on, Sam will be a little more wise about who she messes with."

And so Freddie purchased himself a celebratory churro and then exited the mall and headed over to the bus stop, feeling as though he was walking on air.

Just as he was approaching the concrete bench where the bus would be arriving in seven minutes, though, he spotted a familiar figure sitting, blonde hair blowing in the wind.

Sam had her head bowed and was staring down at her lap, wearing an expression that Freddie had never seen on her.

She looked…hurt.

She wasn't crying, though any person could tell that at that moment, Sam wasn't too far off from doing so.

And then suddenly, Freddie didn't feel as though he had just pulled off the greatest revenge scheme of his life. He felt as if he had done the lowest, cruelest, thing of his life.

_What did I do_? Freddie thought, stopping in his tracks. Did he really just do this to Sam? Sure, Sam made his life…_difficult_ at times, caused him physical pain at least twice a week, and had at least five-dozen different manipulations of his name, but at the same time…had he gone too far? After all, he couldn't remember looking like Sam did right now after any of the stunts she pulled on _him_. He was mostly overcome with annoyance; he never actually felt _sad_.

Taking a deep breath, Freddie stepped towards the bench.

"Um, Sam?"

Sam's head jerked up and looked over at him.

"What?" Sam snapped, surprised. "Oh, it's _you_. What are you doing here, Benson? Come to buy a little puzzle for you and your whackjob mom to put together tonight?"

"Um…" Freddie began hesitantly. He never actually had too many conversations with Sam that didn't involve some sort of insult or physical harassment. "You okay?"

"Huh? What are you talking about," Sam scoffed, trying to act completely natural. "Of course I'm okay, why _wouldn't _I be okay?"

"Well, you-you sort of looked a little…upset," Freddie said slowly, careful to keep a safe distance between him and the blonde at this point.

"Oh, yeah, well, I-I came here because…because I heard there was a sale at Meats on a Stick," Sam said lamely. "And then when I got there, they only had tofu left, which doesn't even count as meat, because-"

_Even for a world-class liar that sounded totally pathetic_, Freddie thought to himself as he took a deep breath. "I saw what happened in the food court, Sam."

Sam stopped midsentence and stared at him. "W-What? Nothing happened in the food court."

"Yes, something did," Freddie said. "With you and Gary Wolf…I-I saw the whole thing, and, um…it-it was sort of harsh."

Sam quickly shifted her gaze away from his. "I-I already forgot all about that. It was just a stupid mistake and I don't even care and-and why don't you just mind your own business anyway, Fred_gut_. What were you even doing spying on me anyway? Your lucky there's a security camera right here or I swear, you'd be-"

"Listen!" Freddie said firmly, shocked at his own bravery. Not many people interrupted Sam Puckett and lived to tell the tale. "Um, I just…I just wanted to say…Gary Wolf is sort of a jerk anyway, you know."

"Pfft," Sam scoffed, rolling her eyes. "Anyone's a jerk to you if they like Carly. You just think he's jerky because you don't want him to scoop up your precious, sweet, little Carly and-"

"That's not why I think he's jerky," Freddie said simply. "I man have never been a huge fan of Gary in the first place, but I think anyone who made you feel as bad as you felt just a few minutes ago is pretty jerky."

Sam blinked, utterly confused. "Um…"

"Yeah," Freddie said, recognizing Sam's lack of words as the equivalent of a 'thank-you' for any other person. He cleared his throat. "Well, um…you taking the bus home?"

"Er, yeah," Sam nodded, still eyeing Freddie oddly. "Um, are-are you?"

"Yeah."

"Well then…I guess it wouldn't be _too _awful to have you wait for it with me," Sam said, giving him a small smile, moving over to make room for him on the bench.

Freddie grinned and sat down next to her.

"Thanks," Sam mumbled under her breath, and Freddie had the suspicion that he wasn't supposed to hear what she had just uttered, so he remained silent.

…**..**

**AN-So with this chapter, I really tried to play out the Seddie relationship like how they were in the beginning of the second season of iCarly, where they weren't nearly as close as they were towards the later seasons, but still getting a little closer. Hope you enjoyed it!**


	388. Chapter 388

**AN-Hey everyone, sorry that I haven't updated in forever. It's been crazy hectic up at school. But now I'm home for a few days for Thanksgiving so hopefully I'll be able to catch up a little. Anyway, this chapter is a sequel for chapter 374, where, like in Zoey 101, Sam winds up accidently confessing her love for Freddie over a webcam and Freddie overhears her. Hope you enjoy!**

…**..**

_Rumor_

"Well," Spencer said indignantly as he stormed back into his apartment, slamming the door behind him. "I can never go back to Bed Bath and Bewilderment!"

"Huh?" Carly frowned, looking up from the sofa where she was sitting.

"Yeah, I spent three hours trying to find you that orange beanbag chair you wanted for your dorm room in the fall, and I kept going back to this display stand for a slushie maker to get free samples they were handing out," Spencer explained. "So obviously I had to pee really badly soon."

"Of course," Carly nodded. "And the problem is…?"

"I went to the bathroom, and _just _as I was about to unzip," Spencer told her. "This _clown_ comes out of one of the stalls and _terrified _me!"

"A clown?" Carly repeated.

"Yes!"

"Why was a clown in the men's bathroom at Bed Bath and Bewilderment?" Carly asked, confused.

"I didn't stop to ask!"

"Right," Carly sighed, getting to her feet.

"So, anything more exciting than a ferocious clown happen here while I was out?" Spencer asked, tossing aside his car keys and plopping down on the nearby chair.

"Well, sort of," Carly started.

"Wait, there aren't any clowns _here_?" Spencer asked, his eyes widening.

"Oh will you cool it with the clowns?" Carly snapped.

"We'll see if you see that if you go to empty your bladder and have your biggest childhood fear come to life," Spencer mumbled indignantly.

"I was actually web chatting with Freddie a few hours ago," Carly explained, ignoring her older brother's comment.

"Oh yeah, how's he doing up at MIT?" Spencer asked.

"Um, good," Carly said. "Gibby and I asked him about his classes and his roommate and being away from home and all that stuff…"

"Gibby and you?" Spencer repeated. "You mean Sam didn't come? Wow, I thought she'd be at least a little upset that Freddie left, but I guess she really-"

"Sam's still in love with Freddie!" Carly blurted out, covering her mouth with her hands the second the words left her.

"What?" Spencer exclaimed, jumping up. "No way! Give me the deets!"

"No, no I can't, I promised Sam I wouldn't tell anyone about this," Carly said quickly.

"Please?" Spencer begged. "I live for this teen drama!"

"Well…okay, I guess," Carly conceded. "Besides, it's not like you have anyone to tell this to anyway."

"Exactly!" Spencer agreed. "Wait…what?"

"Well, see, she came by today after Gib and I finished talking with Freddie," Carly told him. "And I started talking to her about how she's been acting since Freddie left, and how she barely said goodbye to him, and she-she said that she didn't want to say goodbye because she knew it would make it harder because she's still in love with him!"

"Oh man, so what are you going to do?" Spencer asked.

"Me? What do you mean?" Carly replied. "I told you, I promised Sam I wouldn't repeat _any _of this. I can't go back on my word to my best friend! I'm pushing it talking to _you _about all of this."

"Come on, Carly," Spencer said knowingly. "How long do you think you can hold out knowing your best friend is still in love with your other best friend without doing anything to try and manipulate the situation?"

"Are you implying that I'm _meddlesome_?" Carly asked, offended.

"Pfft, yes," Spencer nodded.

"Well you're wrong," Carly said, crossing her arms. "Because I'm not going to do anything about it…Even though it's _totally _ridiculous that Sam won't just _tell _Freddie she has feelings for him. I mean, she'd feel so much better and Freddie wouldn't think Sam's just ignoring him because she doesn't care and everyone would be happier…Oh man, this is gonna be hard."

Just then there was a knock at the door and Gibby let himself in.

"Hey," he said, walking into the living room. "You guys know that there's a family of squirrels outside your apartment that are _very _aggressive with their acorns?"

"What's up, Gib?" Carly asked.

"Oh, I left my phone up in your room from when we were talking to Freddie earlier," Gibby explained. "You care if I go grab it?"

"Sure, go ahead," Carly sighed.

"Hold on," Spencer said as Gibby disappeared upstairs. "I'm still confused. Why _didn't_ Sam just tell Freddie how she felt before he left?"

"Because she's difficult, that's why!" Carly snapped. "She's so convinced that Freddie wouldn't have felt the same way and she would've just embarrassed herself. But I've been telling Sam for _years _that she just needs to learn how to deal with her emotions better and she'd be in such a better place! But no! No one ever wants to listen to Carly!"

"But do _you _think Freddie would've felt the same way?" Spencer asked.

"I-I don't know," Carly answered truthfully. "I mean, they were a pretty cute couple when they were together last year. You know, when they weren't waking me up at two in the morning to referee fights. And there have been a few times after they've broken up when I thought they had a moment or something, but then they'd find some reason to fight and ruin it."

"Man, I leave my phone for a few hours and I get over fifty texts from my masseuse telling me about his ferret," Gibby said, returning downstairs.

"Your masseuse has a ferret?" Spencer inquired.

"Yes…I thought I made that clear," Gibby said. He turned to Carly. "Hey, you know you left your webcam on, by the way."

"Huh? No I didn't," Carly said. "I turned it off after we finished talking to Freddie, remember."

"But the little light's on," Gibby told her.

"Oh, really?" Carly frowned. "Huh. Well I guess maybe I could've just minimized the chat window instead of closing it down. Oh well, it's no big deal. It's not like anything exciting has happened in-Oh no!"

"What?" Spencer asked, concerned.

"Um, Spence…do-do you think that if I left my webcam on…Freddie would've been able to see and hear everything going on in there?" Carly asked.

"Yeah, sure," Spencer shrugged. "If he never turned his webcam off either. Why?"

"Um, well, do you remember that _thing _I just told you a certain someone told me in confidentiality?" Carly continued

"Hey guys, when you talk all secretive like that, it makes it sort of hard for me to follow what's going on," Gibby said.

"That's the point!" Carly hissed. She turned back to her brother. "Well, do you?"

"Yeah," Spencer nodded slowly. "So?"

"Well if my webcam was on and _Freddie's _webcam was on, then it is possible that he…you know,"

"Still not following here, Carls," Spencer said.

Carly let out a frustrated groan. "Spencer! If my webcam was on and Freddie happened to have left _his _webcam on too, then he could've heard the entire conversation me and Sam had!"

"Ohhhh, now I get it," Spencer nodded. "Wow, that's _really _not good."

"You think?" Carly moaned. "Oh man, Sam is going to be so mad at me!"

"Well, come on," Spencer reasoned, putting a hand on his younger sister's shoulder. "What are the odds that you _and _Freddie were stupid enough to leave your webcams on? I'm sure Freddie turned his off right after you talked to him and he didn't hear anything you and Sam talked about."

"Well…Freddie is really good about making sure he shuts everything off on his computer," Carly said slowly. "He doesn't like to waste battery life…Yeah, you know, you're probably right, Spence."

"Exactly," Spencer said. "Nothing to worry about."

"So are we just really going to sit here and not fill me in on any of this?" Gibby asked, crossing his arms.

"Yeah, pretty much," Carly replied. She started towards the stairs.

"Where are you going?" Spencer asked.

"To turn my webcam off for good this time," Carly replied.

She headed back up to her bedroom and sat down at her laptop and saw that Gibby was in fact correct; she had only minimized her chat window. She was just about to quit out of it when suddenly an unfamiliar boy's face popped up.

"Whoa!" the stranger said. "You're hot!"

"Um…thanks, weird computer boy who I don't know," Carly frowned. "Um, who are you and why can I see you on my computer screen?"

"Because clearly we are destined to be together, my sweet, beautiful angel," the boy replied.

"Alright, too creepy!" Carly said firmly. "You have three seconds to tell me what's up before I, um, call the computer cops!"

"My roommate left his web camera on," the boy explained, still looking at Carly like a lovesick puppy.

Carly's eyes widened. "What? Wait, oh no…You-You're roommate's Freddie, isn't it?"

"Correct, and he is quite lucky to know an individual as lovely as-"

"Can it, will you?" Carly yelled. "Um, okay, look. Has Freddie been in the room recently?"

_He said he had to study right before we stopped talking earlier,_ Carly thought to herself. _So maybe he went to the library or something and didn't hear anything!_

"He was until a few hours ago," the boy shrugged. "When I came back in. He was throwing some stuff into a suitcase and told me he had to make an emergency trip back home to Seattle. Something about taking to someone."

"No!" Carly exclaimed, jumping up. "No! No! No! He _did _hear!"

"You seem stressed," the boy said. "Perhaps you'd like to fly out here and I can soothe you with some calming music and a back rub-"

"Oh man!" Carly muttered, quickly shutting out of the chat window. "What am I going to do? Freddie heard Sam confess her love for him! Sam's going to flip out! "

…

Sam was laying on her couch in her living room, tossing popcorn into the air and catching it with ease in her mouth.

She didn't feel like doing much of anything else. She still didn't know if telling Carly her feelings about Freddie earlier that day was a good idea. Yes, Carly was her best friend, but Carly also had a history of letting things slip in an effort to try and manipulate situations.

_Carly wouldn't tell Freddie anything_, Sam reassured herself. _She'd know better._

She sighed. She thought it would be easier by now not to have that pain inside of her when she thought about Freddie for even a second. He had been gone for a week now, and she still felt as though someone had ripped a piece of her away.

Just then there was a short knock on her door and a second later, Carly appeared, letting herself inside.

"Hey," Carly said, not meeting Sam's gaze for some reason.

"Hey," Sam replied, sitting up.

"Um, so, how are you doing?" Carly asked.

Sam frowned. "Fine?"

"Oh, well…good," Carly smiled. "Anyway, listen…about what we talked about earlier-"

"Carls, no, I don't want to bring it up again," Sam said at once. "I get that you're trying to help me out here and all, but I really don't want you to. I still have some feelings for Freddie, sure, but soon I'll forget all about that nub and everything can get back to normal, and he'll never have to know anything about this."

"Yeah, um, about that," Carly said sheepishly, looking down at her feet.

"What?"

"Well, um, how-how mad would you be if say, hypothetically, Freddie _did _find out about this?" Carly asked.

Sam narrowed her eyes. "You remember that time Gibby dropped my bacon wrapped corn dog in the mud and I poured a bottle of hot sauce down his pants?"

"Vaguely, yes."

"I'd be ten times madder if _that _happened," Sam replied.

"Oh."

"Why?" Sam asked. "I mean, he's not going to find out, right?"

"Well…" Carly said slowly. "There-There may be a small chance-"

"Oh my God!" Sam yelled. "You _told _Freddie? He _knows_? Carly! How could you? Why do you always have to do this? You always go and try and meddle in other people's lives and you wind up messing everything up! I told you that I just wanted to forget about this and you _still _went and told Freddie everything anyway?"

"I didn't tell Freddie!" Carly said quickly.  
"Oh," Sam said, lowering her voice. "So he _doesn't _know then?"

"Well, no, Sam, he-he still does know what you said."

"Carly! You just said-"

"I _didn't _tell him," Carly explained. "Look, when we were in my room and you and I were talking…I-I sort of left my webcam on by accident."

"What?" Sam said, looking confused.

"I left my webcam on from when I was talking to Freddie earlier," Carly sighed. "I thought I closed it, by I really just minimized it. And it turns out Freddie didn't turn off his webcam either and he heard us talking."

"No," Sam moaned, sliding down in her seat. "No, no, no. He actually knows now? What the heck am I supposed to do? Okay, maybe-maybe you can talk to him and tell him…tell him I was rehearsing for a play or something! Or tell him I just ate some bad ketchup again and I was delusional! Or tell him I-"

"Sam," Carly said gently. "Freddie….Freddie's coming back to Seattle. He already left MIT."

Sam felt her stomach clench. "He's coming back home?" she whispered.

Carly nodded. "Sam, I'm so sorry. I-I didn't mean for any of this to happen, you've got to believe me. But-But if Freddie dropped everything to come back home and see you because of what you said, don't you think that there's a _chance _that maybe he, you know, feels the same way about you? Maybe this was actually a good thing."

Sam shook her head. "Or maybe the nub couldn't pass up a chance to turn me down in person."

"Sam, Freddie wouldn't do that," Carly said.

"What am I supposed to do?" Sam asked softly.

Carly put an arm around her. "Well, you're going to have to talk to him."

"No! Not that!" Sam groaned. "I hate talking!"

"Well what else is there for you to do?" Carly pointed out. "You can't just say 'Hey Freddie, I know you just flew across the country and everything, but let's not have any sort of discussion about this and we'll just pretend it never happened'?"

"Sounds like a plan to me," Sam said.

"No! No plan!" Carly exclaimed. "I wasn't being serious!"

"Well I'm not going to-"

Suddenly there was a knock at the door.

"It's probably that weird guy my mom's dating from the animal shelter," Sam said, rolling her eyes as she approached the front door. "He always leaves his dog's medication here."

"Well give the creep his pooch pills and then let's calmly and _rationally_ decide what we're going to do," Carly said. "Now, I still say."

"Carly, no!" Sam said firmly, opening the door. "This isn't a 'we' situation. I'll figure out how to fix all of this _on my own_. I don't need you trying to-"

Sam's words suddenly halted as she saw who was standing in her doorway. It wasn't her mom's boyfriend.

It was Freddie Benson.

"Um, hi," Freddie said.

"What-What are you-When did you?-Why-Um, I mean…shouldn't you be at MIT...nub?" Sam said lamely.

"Can I talk to you?" Freddie asked, not waiting to be invited inside as he stepped into the house.

"Freddie?" Carly frowned as she caught sight of her friend. "You're back already? Your roommate told me you were coming here, but I didn't think it would be so quick."

"I paid a few people ahead of me at the ticket line to let me cut them so I managed to get an earlier flight," Freddie explained. He turned back to Sam. "Can we talk?"

"Yeah…no," Sam said, not making eye contact. "I have to see my parole officer in twenty minutes and he hates it when I'm late, and well, he's not the guy I should be pissing off, so I need to run-"

"Sam," Carly said, giving her a look. "You meet with your parole officer on Thursdays. It's Monday."

"My meeting date got changed!" Sam hissed.

"It did not!"

"Carly, I appreciate the help, but I really want to talk to Sam alone," Freddie said.

Carly nodded. "Okay." She picked up her bag. "Sam, um, you know where to find me. If-If you wanna talk about anything. Okay?"

"We'll see," Sam mumbled, less than pleased with her best friend at the moment.

Sam and Freddie were silent until Carly closed the door behind her. Then Freddie took a deep breath.

"So about what I heard-"

_He really doesn't beat around the bush, _Sam thought to herself, somewhat impressed. _MIT must've been good for him so far_…

"You shouldn't have come back because of that," Sam said. "You-You didn't hear right."

"So you didn't say you were still in love with me then?" Freddie asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No, that-that's completely stupid, of course I didn't," Sam said quickly. "I-I said…um…I still loved…"

What had happened to her normally perfect lying skills? Sam Puckett was infamous for being able to pull out a grade A lie in under ten seconds for any high pressure situation you could think of. But somehow, staring in Freddie's dark, chocolate eyes, her talents seemed to flee her.

And Freddie saw right through her.

"Sam," he began. "Why didn't you tell me while I was still in Seattle? You know, to my face and not over a webcam?"

Sam merely gave him a shrug in response.

Freddie looked down at his feet. "So, um, how long?"

Sam looked up at him. "How long what?"

"How long have you-have you felt this way?"

Sam pursed her lips. "None of your business."

"What do you mean none of my business?" Freddie said, exasperated. "It _is _my business. I'm sort of a big part in this whole situation."

If Sam had ever needed more argument to back up her philosophy of stuffing down any feelings besides 'hungry' and 'tired' and 'mad' until you forgot all about them, this was it. She went against everything she believed in and spoke about her own feelings, and look where it landed her. She needed to kick this in the butt.

"Alright," Sam said heavily. "You really want to know?"

"I do."

_I'll just get it all out, and then we'll forget about it and pretend it never happened_, Sam decided. It seemed like her only option at this point. Freddie clearly wasn't going to let her rest until she did so.

"I-I never stopped," Sam said so softly that Freddie could barely hear her. "Ever since we broke up…until, well, when you heard it."

Freddie blinked. "Really?"

Sam glanced at him. "You shocked?"

"S-Sort of," Freddie said, looking quite confused. "Only because, um, well…okay, if you were so in love with me, why did you totally ignore me before I left? Huh? You barely even said goodbye, Sam!"

The confusion in his voice was replaced by anger, and Sam was a little taken aback. But she held her ground.

"Because what difference would it have made, huh?" Sam snapped. "It's just like I told Carly. If I would've told you, you would've still gone to MIT and left me here in Seattle and everything would be _weird_ and-and it was just better to ignore it. _I _know how to deal with this chiz. _I _don't have to do that 'feelings' junk. _I _know how-"

"How do you know that?" Freddie asked suddenly, interrupting her rant.

Sam glared at him. "How do I know what?"

"How do you know I still would've gone to MIT if you told me?"

Sam scoffed. "Please. I've seen pictures of you from elementary school dressed as a geeky MIT graduate for Halloween. You wouldn't give up going there for anything."

"Maybe I would've…for you," Freddie said.

"Ha."

"I'm serious," Freddie said. "Do you know-Do you know how much I secretly hoped after I got my acceptance letter that you would do _something_, say _something_."

"Why?" Sam asked. "Would you have _honestly_ stayed?"

Freddie didn't reply.

"Exactly," Sam nodded. "So why would I have-"

"I think I would've," Freddie said slowly.

Sam shut her mouth, flabbergasted at what Freddie had just said.

"If I knew before I left," Freddie continued. "Even one day before…Sam, I would've stayed."

"To mock me and make up for all the chiz I've done to you?"

"No," Freddie said simply. "Because I feel the same way."

Sam took a step back. "No you don't."

"Yes, I do," Freddie said, his voice a bit stronger. "And do you know what? I've never stopped either. I told you I loved you that night in the elevator…and I never stopped. So it looks like the two of us have just been dancing around each other for the past year when really, we could've…"

Sam crossed her arms over her chest. "Yeah," she said quietly.

The two were silent for several moments, both letting what the other just revealed fully sink in.

"Well," Sam finally said, breaking the silence. "You-You do sort of need to go back, don't you?"

Freddie sighed. "Yeah, I mean, I-I've already started there and I have exams-"

"Right, so, there you go, my point's proven," Sam said. She was surprised to feel that she almost felt worse now, after learning about Freddie's feelings. Maybe knowing that if she hadn't been so dang stupid, things could've worked out. Now she was stuck with that knowledge, and would be forced to wonder what could've been.

"No," Freddie said gently. "Your point's not proven. Come on, Sam, this is stupid. We both just admitted that we still have feelings for each other-"

"But _you're _about to fly back across the country," Sam reminded him.

"I am," Freddie agreed. "But why does that have to play such a big factor here?"

Sam gave him a look. "What are you saying?"

"I know you and I are both pretty stubborn," Freddie said. "But…But are we really let us stop something that we know could be_ great_? So I have to go back to MIT and you're staying here. So what? We can make this work."

"Are you saying…you want to like, you know, get back together?" Sam asked cautiously, hardly daring to believe what was happening.

"We can do long distance," Freddie suggested. "With cell phones and the Internet, it's actually not too hard anymore if you think about it. And we can see each other during school breaks and the holidays and maybe some weekends I can fly back home and if you get that car you've been saving up for we can-"

Sam cut him off by pressing her lips against his forcefully, capturing Freddie in one of the best kisses he had ever experienced.

When they finally pulled apart, Sam gave him a small grin. "You talk too much."

"Sorry," Freddie chuckled. "So what do you say?"

Sam pretended to consider the proposal for a moment, though inside she was practically screaming 'yes!'.

"I guess we can try it out," she said, trying to sound nonchalant. "But you'd better be ready to overnight me my ham. Just because you're across the country doesn't mean you're off the hook with that, nub."

"Of course," Freddie laughed.

Sam laughed to as Freddie wrapped his arms around her.

"So," Sam said, looking up at him. "What time do you need to be back at MIT?"

"I need to catch a plane back in a few hours; I have an early class tomorrow," Freddie said sadly.

"Hmm, a couple hours," Sam said, lacing her arms around his neck. "I think we can work with that."


	389. Chapter 389

**AN-So this chapter is a sequel to chapter 375, where Sam and Freddie had to take care of a robot baby for a class. It's actually not too much of a sequel, but it refers back to that chapter. **

…

_Drug_

"Why did we have to leave Battle of Panthatar reenactment early to come to a drug store?" Gibby moaned as him and Freddie walked into the small store.

"Because," Freddie said simply. "I need to pick up chocolate, tuna, jelly beans, popcorn and peanut butter. Oh, and nausea medicine too."

"What?" Gibby frowned, confused. "What are you going to do with all of that?"

"_I _won't be doing anything with them," Freddie replied. "They're for Sam. She texted me saying she wanted them, so now I'm buying them for her."

"You're whipped," Gibby mumbled. "You never listen to _my_ text messages."

"For the millionth time, Gib, trying to catch that beaver is a bad idea!" Freddie said. "And I'm not whipped."

"Dude," Gibby said, raising an eyebrow.

"Okay, fine. I'm whipped," Freddie conceded. "But Sam's seven months pregnant and as her husband, I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure she's as comfortable as possible until our baby comes. And besides, she's about twenty times scarier now that she's all hormonal. Last night I thought she was going to make some poor telemarketer cry."

"Your baby better be pretty dang cute to make up for missing that battle," Gibby said as Freddie began to place the unusual items in his basket.

"Thanks for the support," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Hey, maybe while we're here, I'll pick up some diapers for Guppy's new pet monkey," Gibby said as the two men passed the diaper aisle.

"I thought Guppy's pet monkey ran away to join the circus," Freddie pointed out.

"Nah, that was his hermit crab," Gibby explained. "He got the monkey to fill the void in his heart. Alright, let's see here…which diapers look good?"

He picked up two packages. "Huh. This is sort of confusing. Did you know there's more than one size of diapers?"

"What?" Freddie frowned. He looked down at the packages. "Oh. I guess there is…Well, that makes sense. Babies grow…"

"Which size do you think would be good for a monkey?" Gibby asked.

"I don't know, maybe the smallest? Or the medium ones? Or how big are the biggest ones?" Freddie asked.

"Well what about these?" Gibby asked, holding up a new package. "These are for the nighttime. What the heck does that mean? Do they glow in the dark?"

"No, of course not," Freddie said.

"Then what do they do?"

"I-I don't know," Freddie said slowly. "Maybe they…sing lullabies?"

"Hey, these say they're have elastic sides," Gibby continued, looking through the rest of the diaper shelf. "What does that do? And do the ones down here with the clown pictures on them seem too creepy for a monkey? Or what about-"

"I don't know, okay?" Freddie suddenly exclaimed loudly, making Gibby drop the diaper packages he was holding in surprise. "I don't know anything about these dang diapers, okay? I don't know which ones you get for a monkey or a clown or a _baby_! What kind of moron doesn't know how to pick out diapers? Huh? Gibby, do you realize that if I can't even do _this _that I'm going to be a terrible father once Sam has our baby? Huh? Do you?"

"Okay…I'm sensing a little tension," Gibby said. "So just help me pick out my monkey diapers and then you can tell me what's bothering you."

"I just _did_!"

"Oh," Gibby said. "I must've zoned out. Can you go over it again?"

"Ah!" Freddie cried out in frustration, quickly shoving his basket into Gibby's arms and storming out of the store.

…..

"I'm telling you Carls, I don't think I can wait another two months for this kid to come," Sam said, shifting in her seat on her couch, trying to get comfortable as she held her Pearphone. "Do you know how many times I've peed today? Sixteen. And it's only noon."

"Oh come on, I'm sure it's not that bad," Carly said on the other line.

"Pfft," Sam scoffed. "My back feels like it's on fire, my feet look like balloons, I feel like I'm about to vomit but I'm sill _so hungry_, and I actually popped the buttons on my favorite shirt today because I'm huge. Trust me, Carly, pregnancy's no picnic."

"Well…just think," Carly said, trying to cheer up her best friend. "All that will be totally worth it when you finally hold that little baby for the first time in a couple months."

"Yeah," Sam said, showing a small smile. "I'm looking forward to that. And you know, there is another plus side to this pregnancy thing. I've got Freddie in the palm of my hand. I can get him to do whatever I want!"

"You've always been able to do that," Carly chuckled.

"Only to an extent," Sam said. "Believe it or not, the nub _does _have a backbone every once in awhile. But now I can wake up at four in the morning wanting fried chicken and I'll have it by four-thirty. It's a sweet deal. And just a little while ago I texted him asking for a bunch of snacks and he left that stupid _Galaxy Wars _convention he was at to get them for me!"

"Just promise you won't abuse your husband too much," Carly said.

"No promises," Sam grinned. "Oh, did I ever tell you about what T-Bo was telling me about the-"

But just then the front door of the house swung open and Freddie stormed in. "Sam! Sam! I am completely lost and I'm completely in over my head and I don't know how to do anything!"

"Uh, Carls…I'll have to call you back," Sam said slowly. "Freddie's being weird."

"Sam, what do I do? Huh?" Freddie asked, sitting down next to his wife.

"You can _start _by telling me what you're talking about," Sam said. "And hey, did you pick up my snacks?"  
"Snacks? Snacks!" Freddie exclaimed, his eyes widening. "Oh man, I forgot all about the snacks! I can't even do that right! Good job, Benson. Way to mess _that _up too!"

"It's okay," Sam said, concerned about her husband's behavior. "Baby…Are you okay?"

"Me? Oh yeah, I'm fine," Freddie said. "Except for the fact that I'm going to be a father in two months and don't even know what diapers to buy for a monkey!"

"You-You want to back up there?" Sam asked.

"Sam, how-how are we going to do this?" Freddie asked. "I-I don't know the first thing about babies. I can't be responsible for one!"

"Hey," Sam said, sitting up. "What are you talking about? You know about babies."

"No, I don't!" Freddie said. "I don't know what they like or what to do when they cry or how to feed them or any of that stuff! I've never taken care of one before! And now I'm supposed to have one of my _own_? Sam, I'm going to screw this kid up so bad."

"Freddie, you're just getting a little freaked out because the due date's getting closer," Sam said calmly. "Trust me, you'll be fine."

"No I won't! I'm going to let you and this baby down and-"

"Okay, Benson," Sam said firmly, getting to her feet. "First of all, you will _never _let me down. And I _know _you'd never let our baby down."

"But I-"

"And second," Sam continued. "You're not a complete moron, you know, despite how you're acting now. You can figure out how to take care of a baby. Tons of people do it. Yeah, it seems hard, and it _is _hard, but you learn. It's just some sort of natural instinct, I guess."

"I don't know," Freddie sighed. "I guess I'm just…scared. Sam, this is a _baby_."

"Really? Because I thought the thing growing inside of me was a watermelon," Sam said, placing a hand on her swollen abdomen.

"You know what I mean," Freddie mumbled.

Sam sat back down next to him and rested her head on his shoulders. His hands instinctively wrapped around her, pulling her closer.

"You don't think I'm scared too?" she whispered.

Freddie looked down at her. "You? But you've never said anything-"

"No," Sam agreed. "But sometimes in the middle of the night, after the eighth time I have to wake up and pee, I just lay in bed for a little bit an think…am I really good enough to be a mom?"

"Baby, of course you are," Freddie said at once.

"I dunno, I'm not exactly the most responsible person on the planet," Sam pointed out. "Or the most nurturing. I mean, Spencer once asked me to hold his guanine pig and I dropped it in a bowl of potato salad."

"I remember that," Freddie said, letting out a small chuckle.

"That potato salad still tasted pretty good," Sam said. "Anyway, but then I remember that one project back in high school."

"Project?" Freddie repeated.

"That one in health class," Sam explained. "Where we had to take care of those robot babies for a week."

"Oh, right," Freddie nodded.

"You remember how awesome we did?" Sam asked. "That was one of my few A's."

"Yeah, I remember," Freddie nodded. "But Sam, no offense, but that was just a project. It wasn't a real baby."

"I know," Sam said. "And a real baby's obviously harder. But don't you also remember how much everyone else struggled with that project? Carly and Gibby both almost had melt downs, Wendy replaced the batteries in her baby with mozzarella sticks and Rip Off Rodney sold his on the Internet. But we did real good, baby. And I always wondered how we managed to pull that off. And then I realized…it was because it was _us_."

"I'm not following," Freddie said.

"If we were paired with anybody else for that project, we both probably would've had just as hard a time as everyone else," Sam told him. "But it was something about taking care of that little robot baby together that really made it seem…doable." She gripped her husband's hand. "We're a team, Freddie. A good one. We're Sam and Freddie. We're completely dysfunctional, yes, but we're _amazing _together. If I was having this baby with anybody else, I'd probably be _terrified _right now and I wouldn't think that there was any way that I could do this. But I'm not with anybody else. I'm with you. I know that we'll do this because we're going to be together during it. We'll raise this baby together and yeah, it will be hard, but well do it."

Freddie sat in complete silence in awe for nearly five minutes after that.

"Wow," he finally managed to say. "I read that some women get pregnancy brain and go completely loopy, but it looks like you become a motivational speaker or something."

"Another point for hormones," Sam shrugged.

"Sam," Freddie said, hugging his wife tight. "I love you. And I love our unborn baby. And you're right. We're going to do this together, and _that's _what's going to make us succeed."

"Exactly," Sam said, leaning up to give him a kiss. He kissed her back passionately. When the two broke apart, Freddie ran his fingers through her hair.  
"I love you," he said again.

"I love you too," Sam said. "But Fredbutt? You're gonna need to go back out and get me those snacks."


	390. Chapter 390

**AN-Well, hopefully tonight's episode of Sam&Cat will be a good one because after a VERY sad game between University of Florida and Florida State, I need some cheering up…Anyway, as with all the Seddie kid chapters, there is another chapter uploaded with this! Enjoy and Go Gators!**

…**.**

_Cane_

"Maybe we should go with the blue," Freddie said, scrunching his brow in deep concentration as he looked down at wallpaper samples. "Oh, but then what _shade _of blue? There are just too many choices here."

"Can you just _pick _one?" Sam moaned. "For the love of ham, Fredward! We're picking out wallpaper for our bathroom! You know, the place where people go and-"

"Hey, any room deserves to look nice," Freddie defended as his and Sam's fifteen-year old daughters walked into the living room. "Emma? Ashton? Which wallpaper sample do you like best for the upstairs bathroom?"

"Don't care," Emma said simply as Sam snickered.

"Hmm, I like the blue," Ashton replied thoughtfully. "But then you have to decide what shade to go with…"

"Exactly my dilemma!" Freddie said. "At least somebody here understands."

"Well there you go, Ashton can take my place in this whole decision making thing," Sam said.

"Um…no thanks," Ashton said quickly. "But do you think maybe Emma and I could have a few bucks for the movies?"

"Didn't you just get your allowance?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah, but Ashton donated most of it to some charity thing at school and I bought this giant jawbreaker the size of my head," Emma explained. "So now we're both broke again."

"Well maybe that will teach you to start saving a little bit every week like I've been telling you," Freddie said. "When I was your age I took three dollars from my eight dollar allowance every month and put into my savings account and you know what? When I got to college I had a whole ninety-two dollars for me to enjoy."

"Yeah, and he went crazy and bought a new laptop case," Sam grinned.

"A _pleather _laptop case, thank you," Freddie said. He turned back to the twins. "Now girls, I'm sorry, but you can't just expect money from us whenever you want to go do something fun. You're fifteen now, and that means you should be responsible enough to budget your savings wisely and-"

"We will next time, daddy," Ashton said sweetly. "We promise."

"Yeah," Emma nodded. "We'll do that lame budget thing. But we love you so much daddy."

"I-well…okay," Freddie conceded, pulling out his wallet and handing a few bills to each of the girls. "But this is the last time, okay?"

"Okay!" the twins chimed happily.

"That was pathetic," Sam whispered to her husband.

"Hey, I think I really got through to them," Freddie replied.

"So we'll be home before dinner," Ashton told her parents. "Clarissa's going to be here in a few minutes and then we're just gonna go pick up Quincy and-"

"Wait, what?" Emma frowned. "Quincy's coming? I thought it was just gonna be me, you and Clarissa."

"No, Quincy called last night and I invited him," Ashton shrugged. "Anyway, after the movie we're gonna grab some ice cream so I can bring you back a cone of that chocolate fudge swirl that you like, mom, and-"

"Um, actually, I don't think I'm gonna go," Emma said slowly.

"Why not?" Sam asked.

"I just remembered I have to do some homework," Emma mumbled.

"It's Friday," Sam said. "You have all weekend for that. Why don't you go have fun with your friends?"

"Nah, I don't feel like it," Emma said, heading towards the stairs. "I'm just gonna do my homework."

"Okay, well, Clarissa's going to be here any second," Ashton said as her sister headed upstairs. "I'm just gonna wait for her outside. I'll see you guys later."

"Wow," Freddie said as Ashton headed out the door. "I'm impressed with Emma. Putting her homework before fun…Good for her."

"You idiot!" Sam snapped, thumping the back of his head. "She's not staying home because she wants to do homework!"

"Ow!" Freddie hissed, massaging the back of his head. "Well then why _is _she staying home?"

"Duh, because Quincy's gonna be there," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"So?" Freddie frowned.

"So? Dude!" Sam exclaimed. "Come on! They broke up like, three weeks ago!"

"Yeah, and I thought they were friends still," Freddie pointed out.

"They are, but that doesn't mean she's ready to spend two hours with him in a movie theatre," Sam said. "I mean she obviously still likes him-"

"What? Pfft, no way," Freddie scoffed.

"You're a moron," Sam said. "Anybody could tell you that. I know, Ashton knows, Carly knows…Pretty much everybody has figured it out besides Quincy. And well, apparently you."

"Are you sure?" Freddie frowned.

"Positive," Sam nodded.

"Wait, so are they gonna get back together?" Freddie asked.

"How am I supposed to know? That's up to them," Sam said, getting to her feet.

"Where are you going?"

"I have to pick Tyler up from baseball practice and since I just spent an entire hour looking at wallpaper samples with you, I think I earned myself a swing past the deep-fried chocolate place on the way."

…

"Hey, you missed a really good movie," Ashton said later that evening as she entered her and Emma's room.

"No movie that you and Clarissa pick out qualifies as 'good'," Emma said. "All you two like are chick flics and romantic comedies."

"Actually, we didn't pick the movie," Ashton replied, tossing her purse on her bag. "Quincy did. We wound up seeing some action movie."

"An action movie?" Emma repeated. "_What_? Quincy _hates _action movies. I've been trying to get him to see one forever!"

"Well he said that he wanted to give them a shot," Ashton said. "Because apparently he's after some girl now who loves them."

Emma jumped to her feet. "A girl?"

"Yeah, that's all he talked about today," Ashton nodded. "It was sort of getting annoying. Me and Clarissa started to block it out after the second hour."

"What girl is it?" Emma asked.

"He wouldn't say," Ashton told her. "But she sounds like Quincy's total opposite, if you ask me. Hey, you okay?"

"Huh? Yeah," Emma said quickly. "Yeah I'm fine."

….

"I really wish the school would stop serving us themed lunches," Clarissa said later on that week as the four teens sat in the Ridgeway cafeteria. "I mean what's this theme supposed to even be?"

"I think they were going for an early St. Patrick's Day thing," Ashton grimaced, examining the green meatloaf on her plate. "This is gross. How can they expect anyone to eat this?"

"Hey, meat is meat," Emma shrugged, digging into her own lunch.

"You're insane," Ashton said.

"You gonna eat yours?" Emma asked.

"Take it," her sister replied, sliding her tray over.

"Do either of you know where Quincy is?" Clarissa asked. "He's usually the first one here."

"How should I know? I'm not his keeper," Emma snapped, almost defensively.

"Here he comes now," Ashton said, spotting the boy making his way through the crowd of students.

"Hey," Quincy said, pulling out his bag lunch. He looked at Emma's tray. "Is that green meatloaf?"

"Yup," Emma nodded, stuffing another forkful in her mouth.

"Uh-huh," Quincy commented.

"So are you gonna hit the smoothie with us after school?" Clarissa asked Quincy. "I think T-Bo has some new flavors to try."

"Oh sorry, can't today," Quincy said, biting into his sandwich. "I'm a little busy."

"Busy?" Ashton repeated. "With what?"

"Well, you know how I was telling you about that girl the other day at the movies?" Quincy asked.

Emma nearly choked on her meatloaf.

"The one you wouldn't shut up about?" Clarissa smiled. "Yeah, we remember her."

"Well, I was thinking…I was gonna maybe ask her out," Quincy said.

"Whoa, no way!" Ashton grinned. "That's awesome! So can you finally tell us who this mystery girl is?"

"Nope," Quincy said firmly. "Not just yet."

"Ugh, why not?" Clarissa moaned. "Wait, do we know her? Is that why you can't tell us who she is?"

"Maybe…" Quincy said.

"Oh my God, I bet it's Chelsea Fruglehorn," Ashton squealed.

"The girl who smells like the inside of a knee pad?" Emma smirked.

"She doesn't smell that bad any more," Clarissa reasoned. She turned back to Quincy. "So is it her?"

"I'm not going to say anything," Quincy said. "But I really need a fool-proof way to ask this girl out. See, she's really special and I don't want to ask her out like some lame old chump."

"You are lame," Emma mumbled, though no one seemed to hear her.

"Well what are you going to do?" Ashton asked.

"I was thinking…I'm going to invite her out to couple's peak tonight," Quincy said, blushing a little.

"Oh! That romantic spot in the part near my house?" Clarissa gasped. "That's perfect, Quince!"

"I think I've got it all planned out," Quincy said. "I'm going to set up this really nice picnic dinner with calming music playing in the background. I'll have a box of those super fancy chocolates ready to give her and then I'll have name spelled out in rose petals."

"Aw!" Ashton and Clarissa smiled as Emma tried to keep a straight face.

"And at just the right moment, I'll ask her to be my girlfriend," Quincy continued.

"Okay, that is too cute," Clarissa said.

"Seriously," Ashton agreed. "Whoever this girl is, she's real lucky, Quincy."

…..

"What are you two up to?" Emma asked later that afternoon, walking up to her bedroom, covered in sweat from her track practice.

"Just going through last year's yearbook trying to figure out which girl Quincy's gonna be asking out," Ashton replied, looking up from where her and Clarissa were sitting on her bed. "Oh, do you think it's Cassie Peters?"

"Nah, I don't think so," Clarissa replied. "I really think it's Hannah Muffler."

"Are you guys still on this?" Emma groaned. She just wanted to forget about this already, but it seemed like her sister and best friend weren't about to let that happen.

"Maybe it's Dianna Jefferson," Ashton suggested, ignoring Emma's comment. "She's cute."

"So is Meghan Marks," Clarissa added.

"What difference does it make?" Emma snapped. "Whoever it is will probably just reject him anyway. Quincy's a total loser."

"You didn't reject him," Ashton reminded her, her eyes sparkling.

"Yeah, well…I should've!" Emma said vehemently. "Because-Because dating Quincy Gibson was one of the worst experiences of my life!"

And with that she stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind her.

…

Emma had told her parents she was going for a walk, and somehow her feet had led her to the nearby park in between her house and Clarissa's.

Emma walked through the grass, angrily kicking along a small rock. Why did everyone have to make such a big deal about Quincy and this new, stupid girl who was probably just _so _ugly and weird? Didn't they know how much harder they were making it for her to try not to care? She was trying desperately to pretend that she was completely over the fact that her and Quincy had dated, but even she knew that this wasn't even slightly true. As much as she'd like to deny it, she still had feelings for her nubby friend, and she _hated _that.

As she continued through the park, she suddenly caught sight of something weird a few yards in front of her. She squinted her eyes and saw that she was staring out at Couple's Peak. It was then that she remembered that this was the spot where Quincy was supposed to be meeting this secret girl of his. And without stopping to think anything through rationally, Emma darted towards the peak. She didn't see Quincy there, but she had to see for herself just what he had planned for this girl.

The girl who wasn't her.

It truly was an amazing set up. Quincy had certainly outdone himself. There were candles and a picnic basket spread out on the peak, and she spotted Quincy's Pearpod hooked up to a small speaker, playing romantic music.

"Wow," Emma whispered. She couldn't believe Quincy had done all of this. He must really like this girl. After all, he had never done anything like this for her when they were dating.

And right as that thought crossed her mind, she felt a few tears welling up in her eyes, but she quickly squeezed her eyes shut to stop them from falling.

She wondered where Quincy was. He probably ran to get a few more things for his date, or maybe he was already on his way to pick up this girl now. But she knew she should get out of the park soon before Quincy saw her and asked what she was doing.

Just as she was about to turn and run back in the other direction, she spotted a ton of rose petals lying a little ways from the blanket.

_He was going to write out her name in rose petals_, Emma recalled. She could find out right now who this girl was.

But then again, did she really want to? Did she really want to see who it was that managed to win over what she knew she had been stupid enough to let go?  
It seemed as if her body had already answered that question as her legs began to lead her over to the petals on their own.

She took a deep breath, bracing herself for whatever it was that was going to be written. She looked down.

In the grass, written beautifully with red rose petals, was the name: Emma.

"Emma?" Emma whispered, confused. Why had Quincy have written out her name in rose petals? Unless…Unless that meant…

"I knew I could count on you to come," a voice behind her suddenly said. She spun around and saw Quincy standing at the picnic blanket, smiling at her.

"What's going on?" Emma asked, stepping over to him. "I-Why'd you write out my name over there? I thought you were writing out the name of the girl who you wanted to ask to be your girlfriend."

Quincy didn't reply, he just kept smiling.

"Dude, what's going on?" Emma repeated. "What happened to that great plan of yours?"

"It worked," Quincy replied. "At least, I hope it did."

"Huh?"

"My plan was for the girl who I want, more than anyone else, to be my girlfriend to come here and make me the happiest guy around," Quincy told her softly, stepping closer to her. "And well, I have her here."

"No you don't," Emma mumbled. "I'm the only one-wait. Do you-Do you mean-?"

Quincy nodded. "It's been you all along."

"Me?" Emma whispered.

"You," Quincy said.

"You're kidding."

"I've never been more serious about anything in my life," Quincy said. "I really regret us breaking up, Emma. It was the worst mistake of my life. I've missed you."

_I missed you too_, Emma said in her head, but her pride kept her from speaking those words aloud. Even though she could already feel her cheeks flushing and her heart racing, she was still not going to give in and act like a lovesick chick like her sister.

"Yeah, well…" Emma shrugged. "I guess it's been, you know, less fun since we broke up."

"Definitely," Quincy agreed. "Which is why I really hope that you make the second part of my plan work."

"The second part?"

"The part where I ask you if you want to be my girlfriend again," Quincy said patiently.

_Yes_! Emma screamed inside, but she contained her enthusiasm. "Hmm," she said thoughtfully. "I guess that would mean _you'd _be my boyfriend again."

"I think that's how it would work," Quincy replied.

"You still nubby and weird?"

"As nubby and weird as I've always been."

"I see," Emma nodded. "Well then, in that case…"

She stepped towards him, closing off the small between the two of them as she pressed her lips to his. "It's a yes," she said whispered when they pulled apart.

….

"Alright, the day is finally here!" Freddie said that evening, walking into his kitchen with Gibby behind him. "The Sci-Fi Network is airing all three of the _Galaxy Wars _films with an entire forty-nine seconds of never-before-seen footage _plus _behind the scenes extras."

"It's the greatest day ever," Gibby grinned, resting the large cane he was holding against the table.

"Um, Gib?" Carly frowned, looking up from the pizza she was helping Sam make by the stove. "Why do you have a cane?"

"I thought it would make me look all sophisticated," Gibby said.

"Yeah, it didn't work," Sam said. "You still look like a total loser."

"Well!" Gibby said indignantly.

"So where's Emma?" Freddie asked his wife. "Since Jason's down at college, she's the only one in this family who I can count on to enjoy the experience with me."

"She went for a walk," Sam replied. "But she should be back any-"

Right on cue, Emma burst into the kitchen from the back door.

"Perfect timing, Em," Freddie said happily. "You ready for the _Galaxy Wars _marathon?"

"Oh yeah, I'm gonna have to take a rain check," Emma said. "Quincy's taking me out to Pini's. I'm just gonna go change out of my track clothes real quick and then I'm out of here."

"Pini's?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah, it's a pretty good date place isn't it?" Emma shrugged. "Anyway, I'll be back later!"

"Did she just say date?" Carly gasped as Emma ran upstairs. "Oh my God!"

"Holy chiz!" Sam grinned. "That must mean-"

"-That her and Quincy finally got back together!" Carly squealed, hugging her best friend.

"Alright!" Gibby cheered, pumping his fist in the air.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Freddie said. "What just happened?"

"Aren't you happy?" Carly asked him. "Emma and Quincy are finally a couple again!"

"Yeah, I gathered that…but I thought they were broken up," Freddie said.

"Duh," Sam said. "Which is why we said they got _back _together."

"Oh," Freddie sighed, not too thrilled that his little girl was once again in the dating scene, even if it was with his best friend's son.

"I've got to say, I didn't think Quincy would move out with that plan so quickly," Carly commented. "We helped him with it what? Two weeks ago?"

"Wait, you _planned _for them to get back together?" Freddie exclaimed. "Carly!"

"Oh calm down, Sam was in on it too," Carly said.

"Sam!"

"Well…Gibby helped too," Sam said.

"It was a lot of fun," Gibby nodded.

"So-So everyone was in on this except me?" Freddie said.

"Yeah, even Ashton and Clarissa were in on it," Carly commented.

"It was Sam's idea not to tell you," Gibby said.

"What?" Freddie cried, turning to his wife.

"Oh come on," Sam said. "You wouldn't want to do anything to encourage Emma to date."

"That's totally…true," Freddie said.

"Exactly, baby," Sam smiled, putting an arm around him. "But now she's happy and that's the important thing."

"I guess," Freddie mumbled. "Well, now that Emma's busy tonight…you want to take her place in the _Galaxy Wars _marathon?"

"Absolutely not."


	391. Chapter 391

_Jazz_

"Isn't senior year supposed to be the best year of high school?" Freddie asked bitterly as him and Gibby entered the Shay's apartment. "Isn't it supposed to be the year you look back on and think about all the good times you had?"

"Rough day?" Spencer asked, looking up from the sculpture he was working on.

"It's this stupid prom," Freddie moaned, flopping down on the couch. "It's way more stressful than I thought it would be."

"Prom?" Spencer frowned. "What's so stressful about that?"

"Everything!" Freddie exclaimed. "Who even invented prom? Huh? It's just a way to get everyone's blood pressure up!"

"Um, I know I went to high school awhile ago, but isn't the hardest part about prom finding a date?" Spencer pointed out. "You and Sam have been together for almost a year; you've _had _a date for this thing for forever!"

"He still hasn't asked her yet," Gibby said.

"What?" Spencer cried. "Dude! You haven't asked your girlfriend to prom yet? It's in two weeks!"

"I know," Freddie moaned. "But it's hard!"

"Hard? How hard is it to say, 'Hey, Sam. Do you want to go to prom with me?'" Spencer scoffed.

"Well clearly things were a lot easier back in your day because now you can' t just _ask _a girl to prom," Freddie snapped. "You have to make a whole production out of it. It's got to be fancy and jazzy. You've got to write it out on in flowers on her car windshield or ask live over the morning announcements. Even though Sam and I have been dating for eleven months and it's implied that we _are _going together, I still have to find the perfect way to ask her."

"Ah," Spencer nodded understandingly. "Well do you have any ideas?"

"Not really," Freddie mumbled.

"I suggested training one hundred doves to spell 'Prom?' out in the sky," Gibby said. "But Freddie says that idea is too extravagant."

"It is!" Freddie defended. "Besides, where would I even find one hundred doves?"

" , duh," Gibby replied, rolling his eyes.

"No, doves are my fourth scariest bird," Spencer said thoughtfully. "I've got it! What are your feelings on interpretive dancers?"

"I'm telling you, he should go with the idea I was telling him about earlier," Gibby said. "With the ukulele and the rolling pin!"

"How about this!" Spencer said excitedly. "He hires a clown to follow Sam around and-"

"Oh forget it," Freddie said, getting to his feet, Spencer and Gibby still tossing ideas around. "I'm going home to maybe try and come up with something in peace and quite."

…..

"I can't figure out what color dress I want," Carly sighed, flipping through fashion magazines on her bed.

"I thought you said you wanted a blue one," Sam said, looking up from her phone.

"I did, but then I think maybe a pale pink would be a good choice. Or a dark red. Or maybe white. You have any ideas for yourself?"

"Nope."  
"Why am I not surprised," Carly said, shaking her head. "You need to find one, Sam. You should ask Freddie if he already picked out a tie so you can coordinate."

Sam shrugged.

"We still need to figure out what we're doing with our hair," Carly continued. "Oh, and I was thinking the morning of prom we go and get our nails done at that fancy new salon that just opened up next to El Guapo Taco."

"Whatever," Sam said simply.

Carly frowned. "What's up, Puckett? You don't seem too prom ready. You know it's only two weeks away."

"I know," Sam said, falling back on Carly's bed.

"So what's the problem?" Carly asked.

"It's stupid," Sam mumbled.

"Sam, that's what best friends are for!" Carly said. "To listen to each other's stupid problems. Now spill."

"It's just," Sam began. "Is it weird that Freddie hasn't asked me to prom?"

"Huh?" Carly said. "You mean he hasn't asked you at all?"

"No," Sam said, shaking her head. "I mean, obviously I'm going with him. We _are_ dating. I guess it's sort of just implied. But still…I sort of wanted him to just _ask_. I thought it would be sort of cool. Is that bad?"

"No way!" Carly said at once. "It doesn't matter if you're _married_, you still have to ask your date to prom officially! I can't believe Freddie hasn't done that yet! Wait until I give him a piece of my-"

"No, Carls!" Sam said quickly, sitting up. "Don't say anything to him, okay?"

"But why can't I-"

"Just don't," Sam said firmly. "It's not a big deal. I mean, maybe…maybe Freddie doesn't _want _to go to prom at all and that's why he hasn't asked."

"I don't know…" Carly said.

"It will be fine," Sam told her. "Don't worry about it."

…..

The night of prom drew nearer and Freddie still hadn't figured out the perfect way to ask Sam yet. He felt bad; he hoped she didn't think that he just assumed they were going together since they were dating. He _was_ going to ask her; he just wanted to do it right…

"Okay Sam," Carly said after school that day, meeting her best friend at their lockers. "You're coming dress shopping with me tonight. Even though your boyfriend is being _stupid_, you both still have tickets, so you're going to go and look stunning in an amazing dress. You can punish Freddie later for not asking you yet."

"I'm not gonna punish him," Sam said, shoving a half-finished sub into her locker.

"You're not?"

"No," Sam said heavily, closing her locker door. "I mean, there really wasn't any reason for him to _officially _ask me. Like we've been saying; obviously him and I are going together. He shouldn't have to go through the trouble."

Just then a girl standing at the row of lockers across from Carly and Sam let out a shriek as several roses fell from her locker as she opened it. All the roses had a tiny slip of paper tied to their stems that read 'Prom?'

"Billy finally asked me to prom!" the girl squealed happily.

"S-See," Sam said weakly. "That's not anything special. Who'd want to have five pounds of flowers fall on them anyway?"

Carly patted Sam's shoulder. "If you need to talk-"

"Talk about what?" Sam said reflexively, swinging her backpack over her shoulder. "I'll see you around Carls. Later!"

…

Every Friday after school, Sam and Freddie would always go to the Groovy Smoothie together. Today the couple wasn't all too talkative, though. Sam was sipping on her smoothie as Freddie fiddled with a loose string on his shirt.

"Okay," Sam finally said, breaking the silence. "I'm gonna just come out and ask here: Are we going to prom?"

Freddie blinked, caught off guard by this question.

"I-Um-"

"This is totally stupid, I know," Sam sighed. "I mean, we're obviously gonna go with each other, right? You have a ticket, I have a ticket, we're _dating_. But are you actually gonna _ask _me?"

"I-Well-"

"Actually, you know what?" Sam said, her voice slowly rising. "It _isn't _stupid. Why haven't you asked me yet, Benson? You can't just _assume _I'm going to prom with you! You don't get a free pass out of asking me just because I'm your girlfriend! So what the chiz are you waiting for? Prom's in less than a week!"

"I know, I know!" Freddie said. "I'm sorry, Sam. I-I know I have to ask you. It's just…well it's hard, okay?"

"How hard is it to ask a simple question?" Sam snapped, taking a long sip of her smoothie.

"Oh come on, you know I can't _just _ask," Freddie said. "I have to do it in some big way that will top everyone else so far."

"What?" Sam frowned, her voice softening. "Baby? Is _that _what's been taking you so long?"

"I really wanted to ask you in the perfect way," Freddie said heavily. "But you know me; I'm not creative."

"Freddie," Sam said, giving him a small smile. "I don't care about you asking me to prom in the most dramatic, over-the-top way possible. I just want to go to prom with _you_. You could write it out on the back of an old napkin for all I care, so long as you _ask_."

Freddie took her hand and squeezed it. "You really aren't mad that your boyfriend didn't ask you to prom with one hundred white doves?"

"I probably would've beaten you up if you did something as cheesy as that," Sam grinned. "Seriously, Fredward, you're probably one of the most romantic guys at school. You do stuff for me all the time. Like a few months ago when you put that necklace in my bag of pork rinds with that five-page love note. You don't need to be fancy when you ask me to prom."

"Well I wish I had know that earlier," Freddie chuckled as Sam continued to gulp down her smoothie. "Because it sure would've saved me a few stressful weeks."

"How lame," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Only a total nub would obsess over something like that for that long."

"True," Freddie agreed. "And while I couldn't exactly come up with the perfect way to ask you to prom, I did manage something…"

"What are you talking about?" Sam inquired, still sipping her beverage. "What did you-"

She stopped suddenly as she heard something rattling in her now-empty smoothie cup. Giving her boyfriend a quizzical look, she took off the lid and saw a small, smoothie-covered purple ball. She picked it, noting that it appeared hollow.

"It opens," Freddie told her, his eyes sparkling.

Sam spotted a small hinge on the size of the ball and she opened it up. Inside was a small slip of fancy, old parchment with the word 'Prom?' written out in fancy calligraphy.

"It's not much," Freddie said. "But I really wanted to ask you today. And I walked by this little store in the mall yesterday that-"

"Hey," Sam interrupted him. She leaned over and gave him a kiss on his lips. "It's a yes," she whispered when she pulled apart.


	392. Chapter 392

_Attention _

"And _that_ answers the popular question of whether a Gibby is smarter than an aardvark," Carly grinned into the camera during yet another iCarly web session.

"The answer is no!" Gibby said happily.

"As if it wasn't already obvious," Sam added.

"And unfortunately, that's all we have for tonight," Carly said. "So until next week, make sure all your pancakes are forty-one decimeters in diameter-"

"-And donate your old socks to the President of Laundry," Sam finished.

"And we're clear," Freddie said, stepping over to his tech cart to turn off his equipment. "Nice show tonight."  
"Thanks," Carly said brightly.

"I'm hungry," Sam said simply, heading towards the door. "That box of Food Pockets still in your freezer?"

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "But there's only one left and Freddie already called dibs on it, so-"

But Sam had already sprinted out the door.

"Oh man!" Freddie moaned, quickly placing down his camera. "She's gonna eat my Food Pocket! Sam! Sam!"

"I told Spencer he should've bought that second box of Food Pockets," Carly sighed as Freddie ran out of the room after the blonde.

"Yes!" Gibby cheered suddenly, looking down at his phone.

"What?" Carly inquired, turning towards the boy.

"My mom put new sheets on my bed!" Gibby explained excitedly. "I've got to get home and see how they look with my special Gibby Pillowcases!"  
"What are Gibby pillow-" Carly began, but Gibby was already on his way downstairs. Carly shook her head. She definitely had some…_unusual _friends. She was just about to make her way downstairs to join them when suddenly something caught her attention out of the corner of her eyes.

Freddie's backpack was lying on the floor of the studio near the beanbag chairs. It was half open on its side and a few of his notebooks had spilled out.

Figuring her and Sam probably knocked it over during the web show, Carly bent down to clean up the mess. As she was sliding the notebooks back into the bag, though, she spotted a small bounded book. She picked it up and examined it.

_Hang on_, Carly thought slowly to herself. _Is this…is this Freddie's journal?_

Carly knew that Freddie kept a journal. His mother had let that slip about a year ago in front of her and Sam. Sam, of course, had mocked him relentlessly about it, saying how it was totally lame and that only girls wrote down their feelings. And while Carly had done her best to bring peace to the situation, Sam would still sometimes bring up the journal to get one over on Freddie.

Neither girl had even actually _seen _the journal, though. That is, until right now.

_Okay Carly, put it back_, Carly told herself, staring down at the small book. _You know you can't read Freddie's journal. That's completely inappropriate! It's an invasion of privacy, it's dishonest, it crosses so many lines, it-it…Oh heck! One page can't hurt!_

Carly looked over her shoulder to make sure that the close was clear before opening the book.

_I don't know how much longer I can take this_, she read. _I wish I could tell her how in love I am with her, but I know it wouldn't end well. If I were to tell her, she would only turn me down. I just wish I didn't have to see her almost everyday; it makes it so much harder for me to try and ignore these feelings. But then sometimes I get the crazy idea that maybe, just maybe, she COULD feel the same way about me-_

"Freddie's in love?" Carly whispered, closing the book, her eyes wide. "With a girl he sees everyday…Oh no. Oh no, oh _no_!"

_I shouldn't have read this_, Carly thought miserable. _Because now I know that Freddie is still in love with me. Aw man! What do I do? I don't want to hurt his feelings, but I have to let him that we'll always just be friends. Dang it! Why'd I have to go snooping!_

"Well," Freddie said suddenly, walking back into the studio. Carly quickly crammed his journal back into his backpack as she jumped to her feet. Luckily, Freddie didn't seem to notice what she had been ding. "Sam got the Food Pocket and is now downstairs devouring it like a wild animal."

"Oh, um, that's nice," Carly said offhandedly.

"Well I wouldn't say it's nice for the empty feeling in my stomach," Freddie mumbled.

_What do I do?_ Carly thought to herself. _Do I just ignore this and let Freddie keep this up? No. I need to tell him. It will be best for everyone if I'm just blunt with him now so he can move on and not dwell on this. _

"Um, Freddie?" Carly said slowly. "Can I talk to you?"

"Sure," Freddie shrugged. "What's up?"

"Well, you-you know how you keep a journal?"

"Ugh, are _you _going to start ripping on me for that too?" Freddie moaned. "I swear, I wish my mom could've just kept her mouth shut about that and-"

"I'm not going to rip on you," Carly said quickly.

"Oh," Freddie said. "Well okay then. What about the journal?"

"Okay…don't get mad at me," Carly began. "But, well…I-I may have sort of…read one page of it."

Freddie blinked. "What?"

"I'm sorry! But I was picking up your backpack over there and it was just staring up at me!" Carly said. "And I know I shouldn't have read it but I couldn't help myself."

Freddie sighed. "Well…okay. I guess it's not too big of a deal. I mean, better you read something from it then Sam, right? Besides, most of that stuff in there is just _Galaxy Wars _doodles."

"Um, see…that's not what I read in there," Carly said. "I actually read the part where you talked about…where you talked about being in love."

Freddie did a double take. "You read _what_?!"

"I'm sorry!" Carly said again. "But-But-"

"How could you, Carly?" Freddie exclaimed. "That was _private_!"

"I thought you weren't mad at me!" Carly said.

"That's when I thought you just saw the doodles!"

"Okay, Freddie," Carly sighed. "Let's just both agree that I was in the wrong here. But we do sort of need to talk about what I read-"

"Nope. No way," Freddie said firmly. "Let's just drop it."

"Freddie, this isn't exactly something I can forget about," Carly said. "It's something the two of us need to discuss."

"_We _don't need to discuss anything," Freddie said.

"Come on," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "I think we're both mature enough to deal with this like adults."

"Carly, it's really none of your business," Freddie told her.

"None of my business?" Carly repeated. "I think it is too my business. It involves me, after all."

"Huh?" Freddie frowned, looking confused.

"Freddie, I know that it sucks when the person you have feelings for doesn't return how you feel," Carly started. "But-But I thought you were over your feelings for me. I thought that you realized that the two of us were best off just staying friends. Yes, we did have that little…er, _thing _a few years ago when you saved me from that taco truck, but didn't you-"

"Carly," Freddie cut her off. "You've got this all wrong."

"No Freddie, just listen," Carly said. "I'm sorry, but I just don't love you the same way that you love me. You're one of my closest friends, and I love you like a brother, but romantically, I-"

"Carly!" Freddie said again. "I'm not in love with you."

"What?" Carly said. "I read it in your journal, Freddie. You don't have to hide it anymore."

"You only read that I said I was in love with someone," Freddie sighed.

"Exactly," Carly nodded.

"But I didn't say it was with you."

Carly blinked. "Wait…you're in love with someone else? Who?"

"Don't do this," Freddie moaned.

"Just tell me," Carly pleaded. "Do I at least know her? Maybe I can help you out!"

"No!" Freddie said quickly. "I-I'm not going to tell her. It wouldn't work out. And I'm not going to tell _you _who she is either. So you can just-"

"Hang on," Carly said slowly, everything beginning to click in her head. "You wrote that you see this girl everyday…If it's not me, then it has to be…Oh my God!"

"Carly…" Freddie said warningly. "Don't-"

"You're in love with Sam!" Carly exclaimed.

"Shh!" Freddie hissed.

"Well am I right?" Carly pressed.

"N-No," Freddie said weakly, not making eye contact.

"I am, aren't I?" Carly said, putting her hands on her hips knowingly.

"I-Okay, yes," Freddie conceded. "I-I think I'm in love with Sam."

"Wow," Carly said. "That's so-I mean, that's great an all. It's just you and Sam seem like such an…unusual couple."

"I know. I told you; it would never work," Freddie said heavily, walking over to his tech cart.

"I didn't say that," Carly said. "It's just, well, you and Sam have been at it for years. But hey, love-hate relationships can work! In fact, I think they're sort of cute."

"You're just saying that," Freddie mumbled, fiddling with his laptop.

"No I'm not," Carly said sincerely. "Look. You need to talk to Sam. I know she loves making fun of you and all, but she's not heartless. She wouldn't tease you about this or-"

"Yes she would," Freddie said. "Which is why, for the millionth time, I'm not going to talk her."

"Freddie-"

"And you have to promise me you won't say anything to her either," Freddie said.

"But can't I just-"

"Carly, promise me," Freddie said firmly.

Carly sighed. "Okay," she nodded. "I won't talk to her about this. But I still really think you should do it yourself. It won't be as bad as your expecting it. Besides, if you really love her, you're going to drive yourself crazy by keeping everything bottled up."

"I'll be fine," Freddie said. He grabbed his backpack from the floor and headed towards the studio door.

"Where are you going?" Carly asked.

"Home," Freddie said. "I sort of want to be alone right now."

"Okay," Carly said understandingly.

Just as Freddie was about to exit the studio, Sam walked in, chewing her Food Pocket with her mouth open.

"You sure missed out on this, Benson," Sam smirked. "This is one good Food Pocket. But hey, Spencer claims he was saving this Food Pocket for his pre-sculpting snack, so he ran to the store to get another box, so you still have a chance. If I don't devour all those too."

"I'm not hungry," Freddie said simply, walking past her.

"Wow, someone woke up on the wrong side of the nub train," Sam chuckled, walking over to Carly.

"He-He's not feeling to great," Carly shrugged.

"Really?" Sam said. "Why? Did they push back the release of that new _Galaxy Wars _movie?"

"No, he-he's a little upset about…something," Carly told her.

Sam frowned. "Is he okay?"

Carly noted the concern in her voice. She knew how rare it was for Sam to be genuinely worried about someone.

_I know I'm right_, Carly thought to herself, studying her best friend's face. _All Freddie has to do is talk to Sam. I know Sam wouldn't reject him; he's afraid for nothing. If he would just man up, he could actually gets what he wants here…_

"Carly," Sam said, snapping Carly out of her thoughts. "Is Freddie okay?"

_I could tell Sam, _Carly told herself. _And then __**she**__ could talk to Freddie. That would end this whole thing and make them both happy. But I promised Freddie…But it would be so easy and it's what's best for both of them…_

"Carly?" Sam said again. "You still with us?"

"Huh, oh…right," Carly said. She took a deep breath. "Yeah. Freddie's okay. He's just stressed about a test he has coming up."

Sam's concerned face faltered and she rolled her eyes. "Typical."

"Y-Yeah," Carly said, pulling on a fake smile. "Typical."


	393. Chapter 393

**AN-So I got a request to do a chapter where Ashton dates that kid who she was seeing in chapter 131, Neil, who was extremely dorky and a huge fan of **_**Galaxy Wars, **_**which automatically made Freddie approve of him. Enjoy!**

…**.**

_Cow_

"Okay, so here's what we're gonna do," Sam said, sipping her coffee at the kitchen table as she scrolled through her laptop. "We go see the fourteenth annual Super Extreme Monster Truck Stunt Show, we get dinner at The Golden Cow Supreme Steak Shack, and then we finish the night off at El Guapo Taco, where I can get the five-pound desert taco."

"Sam," Freddie sighed, rolling her eyes. "Don't you think that's a little much?"

"Hey!" Sam snapped. "You picked what we did on our last date! Did I complain when you dragged me to the stupid locomotive museum?"

"Yes! Non-stop!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Then maybe you should start setting a better example," Sam said firmly.

"But wouldn't you rather do something more…romantic?" Freddie asked.

"Monster trucks are romantic," Sam said.

Freddie put his hands up in defeat, knowing from twenty years of marriage that arguing this with his wife was going to get him nowhere but a spot down on the couch that night. "Fine," he conceded. "That will be our date."

"Thank you," Sam said, satisfied. "Besides…I'm sure you'll find the part _after _the date very romantic."

"Oh will I?" Freddie smirked.

"Yeah," Sam smiled, leaning over and giving him a kiss on his lips.

"Ugh! Will you leave me alone already?" came the voice of Sam and Freddie's fifteen-year old daughter, Emma, as she stormed into the kitchen, breaking the couple apart.

"Why are you being so difficult?" Emma's twin sister, Ashton, retorted, following Emma to the fridge.

"Alright, what's going on now?" Sam asked, pulling apart from her husband.

"Emma's being completely unreasonable!" Ashton said, putting her hands on her hips, glaring at her sister as she grabbed a soda from the fridge.

"You're the one being unreasonable," Emma said, sipping her beverage.

"Emma, why do you think your sister is being unreasonable?" Freddie sighed.

"Because she wants to tag along on my date with Quincy tomorrow night!" Emma replied.

"I don't want to tag along!" Ashton said. "I said I wanted to have a double date with you guys!"

"Same thing!"

"Well Quincy said he's on board for it!"

"Quincy doesn't make the decisions!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Sam said, breaking up the argument. "Ashton, who do you have a date with?"

"Yeah, since when are you seeing anybody?" Freddie frowned.

"Well, um," Ashton began nervously. "I sort of…I kind of-"

"Her and that dorky Neil kid got back together," Emma finished for her.

"Really?" Freddie said excitedly. "Well that's great sweetie! I loved Neil; he really reminded me of me at that age…"

"A total nerd?" Emma asked, and Sam tried hard not to laugh.

"When did you guys get back together?" Freddie asked, ignoring Sam and Emma.

"We haven't exactly officially gotten back together," Ashton explained. "We just agreed to go out and have dinner together and see where we go from there. But I want it to go well, which is why I want to go on a double date with Em and Quincy. It would be a lot less awkward and we'd be more likely to, you know, get back together."

"I see," Freddie nodded. "Well in that case…Emma, let your sister go on a double date with you or your grounded."

"What?" Emma cried. "That's so not fair!"

"Hey, if this is what it takes to make sure Ashton doesn't date anymore stupid jocks or pretty boys, then so be it," Freddie said.

"Mom!" Emma said, turning towards Sam.

"Listen, I'm not going to hear the end of this until this happens, so just go with it, will you?" Sam told her daughter.

"Fine!" Emma groaned. "I'll go on a dang double date with Ashton."

"It will be fun," Ashton smiled at her sister. "Oh! We should go shopping for some cute dresses to wear!"

"How about no?" Emma said firmly, stomping out of the kitchen.

"Finally, Ashton's back with a boy I approve of," Freddie said happily as Ashton followed Emma out.

"Man, that Neil kid was an even bigger dork than Quincy is," Sam said.

"I know!" Freddie grinned. "Isn't this great?"

….

"Okay, so let's go over this one more time," Ashton said to Quincy and Emma as they waited outside Pini's. "You guys are going to help take away all of the awkwardness of a first date so that way me and Neil can just focus on getting back together, okay?"

"Will you stop freaking out already?" Emma said to her twin.

"Ashton, everything will be fine," Quincy assured her, putting his arm around Emma. "We'll make sure everything goes great tonight."

"Thanks Quincy," Ashton smiled. "At least _one _of you is being supportive."

"Hey, I'll be supportive," Emma said. "Just don't drag me on your dates. Do you realize what I'm missing being here right now? The first look interviews from the new _Galaxy Wars _movie that comes out next month! They're showing them on the Sci-Fi channel tonight at eight an I'm gonna be stuck here! You better hope dad remembers to record it for me."

"It won't be that bad," Quincy said.

"You better hope not," Emma mumbled. "Where is Neil anyway?"

"His mom's dropping him off here," Ashton replied. "Because he's coming from debate club practice."

"Oh my God," Emma said shaking her head. "Well can he at least speed it up? I'm starving!"

"Here," Quincy said, pulling a chocolate bar out of his jacket pocket and handing it to his girlfriend. "I brought this just in case there was a wait."

"You're the best," Emma smiled, taking the candy bar.

"See, _this _is why I wanted you two to come here tonight," Ashton said. "You two are a great couple! Think of this as you guys passing your dating wisdom down to less experience couples. Just-Oh! There's his mom's car!"

A van pulled up in front of the restaurant and a small boy with large classes hopped out.

"Bye mom!" Neil said, waving as the van sped away.

"Just please me nice," Ashton whispered as Neil approached. "_Emma_."

"We'll see," Emma shrugged.

"Hi you guys!" Neil said happily.

"Hey Neil," Ashton smiled, giving him a quick hug. "You know my sister, Emma, and her boyfriend, Quincy, right?"

"Of course," Neil nodded. "In fact I think it was Emma who took my cherry Freezie-Pop last week."

"You what?" Ashton hissed, turning to her sister.

"Well you took the last Freezie-Pop at home," Emma defended. "I was hungry!"

"She's really sorry," Ashton said quickly. "Aren't you, Em?"

"Apparently," Emma said.

"So, um, why don't we go inside and see if our table's ready?" Quincy suggested.

"Good idea," Neil nodded. "You know, I heard Pini's is quite famous for its lasagna."

"Yeah, it's really good," Ashton said. "You'll love it, Neil."

….

An hour later, the four teens were sitting in their booth, all digging into their lasagna.

"-And then I pushed Quincy into the skateboarder," Emma said, smiling at the memory.

"I broke my foot," Quincy chuckled.

"And I got grounded for a month," Emma finished.

"Um…wow," Neil said. "That's an, um, interesting story."

"Yeah," Ashton nodded. "Interesting."

"Well, I'm going to run to the restroom real quick," Neil said, standing up from the table.

"Okay," Ashton said sweetly. She waited until Neil was out of sight before turning to Emma and Quincy. "What the heck are you guys doing?"

"What?" Quincy frowned.

"We're being a delightful couple, just like you asked," Emma said.

"No, you two are being a-a-whackjob couple!" Ashton snapped. "All we've heard are stories about Quincy being pushed into things by Emma or Quincy selling Emma's things online to get back at her for something!"

"Look, I thought you wanted us here tonight to keep this date from being awkward," Quincy pointed out. "And there haven't been any awkward silences or lulls."

"Yes, but you're freaking Neil out!" Ashton said. "Besides, the poor guy hasn't even had much of a chance to talk about anything."

"Not our fault he's totally boring," Emma shrugged, grabbing a breadstick and some Parmesan cheese.

"He's not boring," Ashton said. "Just give him a chance, okay? I appreciate you guys coming here tonight, I really do, but how about you guys tone down your…craziness and focus on making Neil feel included, okay? I like him a lot, and he's a lot better than any of those other guys I've dated. I want to get back together with him, and for that to happen this date has _got _to go well."

"Alright," Quincy nodded. "We'll try to include Neil more."

"Thank you," Ashton said.

"I swear, you owe me big time for this," Emma said as Neil came back to the table.

Quincy cleared his throat as Neil sat down again.

"So, um, Neil," Quincy began. "You-You have any hobbies?"

"Certainly," Neil replied. "I'm very into debate. Oh, and I do enjoy making models of 1950's comedians out of paper mache."

"Really? I'm actually into pottery," Quincy said. "In fact I'm president of the pottery club at school."

"Yeah, _tell _people that," Emma mumbled, earning her a kick under the table from Ashton.

"Maybe you should go to a pottery club meeting with Quincy next week, Neil," Ashton suggested. "They meet every Wednesday after school."

"Well it does sound like fun," Neil said. "But unfortunately this Wednesday I have a commitment. See, the debate team is having a mock tournament to prepare us for our real tournament at the end of the month."

"Oh," Ashton said. "That sounds cool."

Emma rolled her eyes. "Yeah, cool…"

"What's your mock tournament about?" Quincy asked.

"Oh, it's a bit of a fun topic," Neil chuckled. "See, I'll be debating from the point of view of the Red Sky Nauts about the issue of phaser control and my opponent will be debating from the point of view of the Blue Sky Nauts."

"Sky Nauts?" Ashton repeated. "Aren't those things from _Galaxy Wars_?"

"Yes, it's not an _actual_ debate topic," Neil nodded. "We're just using it as a way to warm up."

"Wait," Emma frowned, setting her fork down. "Why would you argue from the point of the Red Sky Nauts about phaser control? Everyone knows that the Blue Sky Nauts are totally right about that."

"I'm afraid I'll have to disagree," Neil said. "After all, it was the Blue Sky Nauts ban of any gamma ray firing devices that sent the Panthatar government into turmoil after the fall of Emperor Gongmaton."

"Please!" Emma said. "The whole reason the war between Princess Ablogata and Nug Nug's army was the over possession of Proton Firerers and Carbon Phasers by the Red Sky Nauts!"

"Um…okay," Quincy frowned. "So clearly you two both are really big fans of-"

"Oh come on," Neil said. "Siding with the Blue Sky Nauts on an issue like phaser control is like saying Lou Groundrunner was fit to run the Galactic Congress."

"He was better than Quan Mengo!"

"Quan Mengo was twice the leader Lou would ever be!"

"Okay, so, um-"Ashton began.

"Quan Mengo single-handedly destroyed half of the population on the planet Romolton!" Emma retorted.

"Which isn't nearly as bad as the mess Lou stirred up during his little Proton Cruiser chase through the Luptinian Galaxy!"

"You know," Quincy said to Ashton as Emma and Neil continued their debate. "You _did _sort of ask for this…"

"I know," Ashton sighed. "And believe me, I regret it."

…..

"You cheated!" Sam said angrily, throwing her Monopoly piece angrily onto the floor.

"How did I cheat?" Freddie asked, amused.

"I don't know, but you cheated," Sam snapped, crossing her arms. "Didn't he, Tyler?"

"Can I just go to bed?" the eleven-year old yawned.

"Sure," Sam sighed.

"You know, it would be nice to play a family game that didn't end in you throwing something," Freddie commented, cleaning up the game.

"We'll see," Sam said as the front door opened and the twins came in.

"Hey!" Freddie said brightly. "How'd the double date go?"

"Horrible," Ashton said. "I am never going on another double date with Emma again."

"Did it not go well?" Sam frowned.

"I had fun," Emma smiled.

"Wait, wait, wait," Freddie said. "So does this mean that Neil is done? Dang it!"

"No, Neil and I are going on another date this weekend, by _ourselves_," Ashton said, glaring at her sister. "We're going to get ice cream."

"Oh, well, okay," Freddie said. "But then what was wrong with the date?"

"Eh, she's exaggerating," Emma said.

"I am not!" Ashton exclaimed. "You totally hogged my date!"

"Huh?" Sam said, confused.

"I didn't hog your date," Emma said, rolling her eyes. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go stuff my face with marshmallows because I swear, Pini's made their portions smaller. Oh, and I'm joining the debate team, by the way."

"What?" Freddie said as Emma headed into the kitchen.

"And I have to go online and look up useless _Galaxy Wars _trivia," Ashton mumbled.

"Um…are you as lost as I am?" Sam asked Freddie as Ashton climbed up the stairs to her room.

"Uh-huh," Freddie nodded slowly.

"Well Benson," Sam sighed. "Looks like we've finally reached the point where teenage shenanigans no longer make sense to us."

"I think I reached that point five years ago when Jason tried to start his own parakeet messaging system," Freddie said, shaking his head.

"Yeah well, teenagers are weird," Sam said. "We weren't that bad, were we?"

"No way," Freddie said.


	394. Chapter 394

_Selling_

Carly Shay walked down the stairs into the kitchen, about to make herself breakfast to start her day. She stopped in her tracks, though, when she reached the foot of the steps and spotted Freddie standing at her kitchen sink, shaving.

"Um…what?" Carly frowned.

"Oh, morning Carls," Freddie said, looking over at her. "Spencer bought some orange juice for breakfast."

"Okay," Carly said. "But why are you shaving in my kitchen?"

"Oh," Freddie sighed. "See, my mom decided razors were too dangerous for us to keep in our apartment anymore, so I had to sneak over here to shave this morning. And Spencer's been in his bathroom for over an hour now, so I figured this was my best option."

"Ah," Carly nodded, grabbing a banana from the fruit bowl on the counter. "Well alright then. Anyway, you ready to finish up the last few skits for iCarly tonight? Sam should be here soon, and then we can-"

Right on cue, Sam walked into the apartment.

"Hey, hey," she said, heading into the kitchen.

"Hey," Freddie smiled at his girlfriend.

"Why are you shaving in the middle of the kitchen?" Sam grinned, giving Freddie a quick kiss on his lips, getting a bit of shaving cream on her nose in the process.

"My mom," Freddie explained simply, wiping the cream off of Sam's nose.

"Hi to you too, Sam," Carly said, rolling her eyes as she watched her two best friends with a somewhat amused look.

"Oh, hey Carly," Sam said, pulling away from Freddie. "What's up?"

"Well, like I was just telling Freddie before you got here," Carly said. "We need to finish rehearsing the rest of the iCarly skits for the show tonight. Did you pick up the bread pans we needed?"

"Oh…you said _bread pans_?" Sam asked. "That makes more sense…See, I thought you said _bed _pans, so I had to go to this retirement home and-"

"Okay, do _not _want to hear this," Carly said quickly, grabbing her keys. "Let's go run to the store to pick up the right pans, and then we can go by the retirement home and apologize."

….

"Great show tonight, you guys," Spencer said later that evening as him, Gibby, Carly, Sam and Freddie sat around the coffee table in the living room, digging into a pizza. "Real funny stuff. I loved it when you guys set Gibby's shoes on fire."

"That wasn't exactly planned," Carly said slowly.

"Yeah! And you guys owe me a new pair of socks," Gibby said indignantly.

"Please, those things were hideous," Sam said from the couch, where Freddie had her arm around her.

"They were my special Christmas socks!" Gibby defended.

"Who wears Christmas socks?" Sam scoffed.

"Okay," T-Bo said suddenly, letting himself into the apartment. "Mrs. Benson is too crazy."

"Dude, she's always been crazy," Freddie pointed out.

"Did she take your razors too?" Carly asked.

"Yes!" T-Bo exclaimed, sitting down next to Spencer and helping himself to a slice of pizza. "Now I have to ask for new razors for Christmas instead of the fancy heated mittens I told my grandma I wanted."

"Whoa, they make heated mittens?" Spencer gasped.

"Yup, you can buy three pairs for twenty dollars at ," T-Bo nodded.

"Sweet!"

"Hey, maybe we should get a pair for granddad," Carly said to her brother. "I mean, Christmas is only ten days away and we still don't have a gift for him."

"Whoa, Christmas is ten days away?" Freddie frowned. "I thought it was further away than that."

"Aw man, I totally lost track of time," Sam moaned. "I was supposed to order my mom some fancy toenail clippers weeks ago!"

"Aw! And I was supposed to get something for that English girl at the donut shop," Spencer said.

"You're dating her?" Freddie asked.

"No! That's why I was getting her a gift!" Spencer said. "It's called 'wooing her in'."

"And I still need to find something for Guppy," Gibby said. "But that kid is so hard to buy for. He doesn't have any soap preferences, he can't pull off the color green…"

"Hey," Carly said, crossing her arms. "Let's not get stressed out, you guys. It's Christmas time! It's supposed to be _happy_. You know what? I have a fun little idea. Why don't we have a sort of secret Santa thing with the six of us?"

"Secret Santa?" Gibby repeated. "What's that?"

"You never heard of Secret Santa?" Spencer frowned.

"Listen," Gibby said. "I don't know much about the whole 'Santa' thing. The guy always freaked me out when I was a kid. Big fat guy breaking into your house in the middle of the night? That's some scary stuff!"

"It's just a game," Carly explained. "We all put our names in a bowl and then you pick someone and you buy them a present. And you can't tell anyone who you got until we get together to exchange the gifts."

"That sounds fun," Freddie said.

"Yeah, I haven't had enough friends to secret Santa in years!" T-Bo said excitedly.

"Great," Carly grinned, grabbing a bowl and a pad of paper from the counter and heading back to the group. She wrote down all their names on slips of paper and tossed them into the bowl.

"Okay, here you go," Carly said, handing the dish to Spencer. "Pick a name. Oh, isn't this so exciting?"

"Tons of fun," Sam smirked as Spencer passed the disk to T-Bo.

"Can you improve your attitude?" Carly asked, rolling her eyes.

"That's what I ask her every day," Freddie chuckled, taking the dish from Gibby.

"Hey, watch it, nub," Sam snapped. She grabbed the bowl from her boyfriend and took the last piece of paper.

"So is everybody fine with doing the gift exchange next weekend?" Carly asked. "On Christmas Eve."

"Yeah, I don't have any plans," Spencer shrugged.

"What a surprise," Sam said.

"Hey!"

"Okay then, we'll meet in a week," Carly said happily.

"You know, I think this whole thing was just a plan to give you an excuse to do more Christmas shopping," Sam said knowingly.

"Maybe," Carly said.

Sam laughed as she unfolded the piece of paper and looked down on the name written on it: Freddie.

She did a little cheer inside her head; she had been hoping she'd get Freddie.

But then her joy was quickly replaced by the pounding question of what exactly to get her boyfriend. This was her and Freddie's first Christmas together as a couple, and she didn't want to screw it up. She knew she was going to have to find him the perfect present. She had to start right away.

"Hey, where are you going?" Freddie asked as Sam quickly got to her feet.

"Um, home," Sam said, grabbing her jacket. "I forgot that I need to give Frothy his rabies medicine." She gave Freddie a quick kiss. "I'll see you guys later."

"Bye," Freddie said, watching as his girlfriend rushed out of the apartment. Once the door had closed behind her, Freddie looked down at his own piece of paper and unfolded it to see who he would be buying a gift for.

The sheet of paper read Sam.

_Alright_! Freddie thought to himself. _But what am I supposed to get Sam? Oh man, this is our first Christmas as a couple; I've got to get her an amazing gift! _

"Where are _you _going now?" Carly frowned as Freddie jumped up and headed towards the front door.

"Um, I-I think I heard my mom's whistle," Freddie said. "Gotta go!"

He flew out the door and slammed it shut behind him. If he was going to find Sam the perfect present, he was going to have to start now.

…..

"Sam, no, you cannot send Melanie a box of taco shells for Christmas," Carly sighed as her and Sam walked through the packed mall. "She's your sister; you have to buy her a real present."

"Hey! Tacos are delicious," Sam defended.

"Melanie hates tacos," Carly reminded her.

"Not my problem," Sam shrugged.

"Look," Carly said. "How about this? We'll go to the jewelry store and buy her a cute pair of earrings or something, okay?"

"Fine," Sam sighed. "But can we at least stop by the food court?" She dug into her bag and pulled out her beloved giant fork. "I brought my big fork with me!"

"No! No snacking," Carly said firmly. "You need to finish your Christmas shopping. You still need to get something for your grandma, your Aunt Maggie, your cousin Blake-"

"Okay, okay!" Sam conceded, shoving her fork back into her bag.

Just then the girls walked past the large comic book shop.

_Wait, _Sam told herself, looking back at the shop. _That place is full of all sorts of nubby things Freddie would want for Christmas!_

"Hey, um, Carls?" Sam asked. "Do you think maybe _you _could hit the jewelry store and pick something up for Melanie? I was thinking I could maybe go to the lotion place and grab something for my Aunt Maggie's rash, and that's all the way on the other end of the mall. Besides, you're taste is more like Melanie's anyway."

"Well…I guess that would save us time," Carly said thoughtfully. "Okay, I'll meet you back here in an hour."

"Good deal," Sam said. She waited until Carly was well out of sight before turning around and darting into the comic shop.

"Whoa!" a scrawny looking boy near the sales bin said as Sam entered the shop. "Look! A real live girl!"

"Watch it, or I'll be the last girl you ever see," Sam said, raising a fist warningly.

The boy gulped and Sam smiled triumphantly as she headed over the counter where the store's owner was working.

"Um, hey," Sam said. "So I'm looking for a gift for someone and I don't know anything about all this geek chiz-"

"Excuse me, this merchandise is not 'geek chiz'," the owner snapped. "Everything in this store is an authentic collectible!"

"Yeah…okay," Sam said, resisting the urge to smack this man. "Can you just show me some things that a dude who has way too big of a _Galaxy Wars _obsession would want?"

"Well, if you're shopping for a _Galaxy Wars _fan," the owner said. "Then you've come to the right place. We've got a one-of-a-kind Nug Nug helmet-"

"Nah, he's already got some sort of Nug Nug head," Sam said.

"We have a Sky Naut battle ray."

"Eh, I don't think he likes the Sky Nauts that much," Sam shrugged. She looked down at the glass display case in front of the man. A golden rod caught her attention.

"Hey, what's that gold thing?" Sam asked.

"Oh, that's a brand new piece," the man told her. "It's the golden Light Sword handle that gave Lou Groundrunner the strength to fight off the Dronotrons in Episode III."

"Hey, I think Freddie actually has that light stick thingy," Sam said, remembering seeing the prop in Freddie's bedroom and making fun on it. "Yeah…Oh! And he said that he was looking for some special golden handle thing to go with it but he could never find it!"

"That's because this baby is one of the rarest pieces in the _Galaxy Wars _franchise," the owner said. "They don't even sell them over the Internet anymore."

"It's perfect," Sam said. "Completely lame and stupid, but perfect. I'll take it."

"Great," the owner said. "That will be nine hundred and forty-one dollars."

"Nine hundred forty-one?" Sam exclaimed.

"Plus tax," the owner added.

"I don't have that!" Sam said, setting her bag on the counter and pulling out her wallet. "I have…thirty-three dollars and half a peanut crunch bar."

"Then you don't have this gem," the owner said firmly.

"Listen," Sam sighed. "I _need _to get that handle thing. Isn't there any way you could sell it to me for thirty-three. I-I'll work here for the rest of the week! You guys have to be swamped with all the holiday shoppers."

"No, we don't have many customers," the owner said simply.

"That's because you have the worst prices, genius!" Sam snapped. "Um, okay, well…what if I give you free advertising on ? It could boost your businesses."

"I don't advertise on websites that aren't centered around MMORPG's," the owner told her.

"Come on!" Sam said angrily, pounding her fist on the counter. "There's no way that thing is worth almost a grand!"

"My prices are the fairest in all of Seattle!" the man retorted. "And if you don't have the money, then you don't have the Golden Handle of Panthatar!"

"Fine!" Sam snapped. "Whatever!" She made to grab her bag and storm out, but in the process, her giant fork fell out and landed on the counter.

"Whoa!" the owner said, looking down at the oversized utensil. "That's the biggest fork I've seen in my life."

"Huh? Oh, yeah. I know," Sam mumbled.

"In fact," the man said, studying the object intently. "It's exactly what I've been looking for as the finishing touch for my Acrytic Giant costume for the War of Warlords convention next month."

"Cool," Sam spat. "I'm sure you'll be the most giant geek there." She turned to walk out of the store.

"Wait," the owner called after her. "Okay, how about this? I make you a trade for the Golden Handle of Panthatar?"

"A trade?" Sam repeated curiously. "What kind of trade?"

"I'll give you the handle," the owner told her. "If you'll give me your giant fork."

"My giant fork?" Sam exclaimed. She looked down at the utensil in her hand. It was probably one of her favorite possessions. She brought it almost everywhere she went, just in case a meal broke out. It always promised her large portions of ham, steak, roast beef, _anything_. Just the idea of parting with it made her feel sickened.

But then she thought of how Freddie's face would light up when she would give him that handle…

"I-Okay," Sam sighed. "Deal."

…

"Gib, we've been at the mall for over three hours now," Freddie moaned as him and Gibby tried to avoid colliding with the many bustling shoppers. "Just go buy your cat a Christmas present from the pet store like a normal person!"

"No way," Gibby said stubbornly. "That's so impersonal. Hey, do you think he'd like a calendar?"

Freddie rolled his eyes. Gibby may be one of his best friends, but he definitely didn't understand what went on in his head sometimes. But this shopping trip was taking far too long; he had things to do! Mainly finding a present for Sam…

_You know what_, Freddie told himself as Gibby perused a Mexican desert calendar at a small kiosk. _I'm at the mall, I might as well take advantage of that and try and find Sam something here_.

"Um, Gib, I'm gonna run over to Placemat Paradise and see if I can find something my mom would like," Freddie said. "I'll meet you by the corndog stand in an hour."

"Huh? Oh, okay," Gibby nodded, looking up from his calendar.

Freddie began to walk past the many stores, racking his brain for gift ideas.

"Perfume?" Freddie said to himself, walking past a fragrance store. "No, Sam's not into that stuff. Jewelry? Maybe, but I don't know if she'd love that as much as something else…"

Then he walked past a huge novelty store that specialized in odd, unusual items. It was the perfect place to find something Sam would enjoy.

"Let's see," Freddie mumbled, looking through the shelves of merchandise. "Half of these things would probably be used to cause me bodily harm, so we'll stay away from those…Maybe she'd like beanbag massage chair? Nah, her mom ruined her last beanbag chair by taking a nap in it wearing her bikini…"

"Hey, you looking for something?" a cashier asked from behind the glass counter.

"Yes," Freddie said. "I'm trying to find a present for my girlfriend."

"You're getting a gift for your girlfriend at a novelty shop?" the woman frowned.

"She's really into this stuff!" Freddie defended. "Look, do you guys have anything really…special?"

"Hmm," the woman said thoughtfully. "Well, this just came in today." She reached down and pulled out a jar filled with green slime and what looked like an eyeball.

"Um…what is that?" Freddie asked, cringing.

"It's Charles Dingo's eyeball!" the woman said. "See, about a year ago, the Dingo channel was having some financial trouble, so they had to sell Charles Dingo's frozen head, and this is one of his actual eyeballs we managed to get!"

"Wow, that's real, er, nice," Freddie said, trying not to gag. "But Sam's not a fan of the Dingo channel. But we're definitely on the right track with the grossness level here. What else do you have?"

"We have a custom made talking yo-yo that speaks Spanish," the woman told him.

"Nah, anything else?"

"Well, we just got in a shipment of celebrity teeth," the woman said, pointing to a row of molars stored in the glass counter.

"Hmm, maybe that will work," Freddie said, studying the different options.

"Well while you make up your mind," the cashier said, pulling out a large case and a lunchbox. "I'm going to eat. There's so many dang customers in here today that I have to work though my lunch break!"

She typed in a long code onto the security system on the case and opened it up to reveal a giant spoon.

"Whoa!" Freddie said. "That's a huge spoon."

"I know, I got it from the Internet," the woman nodded.

"You know," Freddie said slowly, staring at the spoon case. "My girlfriend actually has a giant fork just about that size. Man, she loves that thing. And she doesn't really have any place to put it. She usually just stashes it in her purse, but she's always complaining about how scuffed up and dirty it gets in there. Plus she's worried that it will fall out or someone will take it. That case would be great for her. Do you sell them here?"

"Nope," the woman replied, taking out her laptop.

"Oh, well, do you know where you got your case then?" Freddie asked.

"Japan," she told him. "But they don't make these babies anymore."

"What?" Freddie moaned. "Come on! This is the perfect gift for Sam! Um, listen? Would you be willing to maybe sell me your case? I can pay you…" he pulled out his wallet and quickly counted his cash. "Two hundred and fifteen dollars."

"No deal," the woman said firmly, typing onto her laptop. "Now if you aren't planning on buying anything right now, I'm just going to check and see if I won my online auction."

"Okay," Freddie sighed. "I guess I'll just-"

"Aw man!" the woman said angrily, looking at her computer screen. "I lost! Stupid CheesyTies29 outbid me! Dang it, now I'll never find another Lou Groundrunner Light Sword."

"Oh yeah, those things are hard to find," Freddie nodded. "I remember it took me over a year to track down mine."

"Wait," the cashier said slowly. "Are you saying you actually _own _a Lou Groundrunner Light Sword?"

"Yes I do," Freddie said proudly. "That baby's handing right above my bed."

"Holy chiz! You're probably the only person in Seattle with one of those things!" the cashier gasped. "Listen, how about we make a little deal about this case that you want?"

"What kind of deal?" Freddie asked, interested.

"I'll give you this case, completely free of charge," the woman told him. "If you give me that Lou Groundrunner Light Sword."

"My Light Sword?" Freddie exclaimed.

That Light Sword was his favorite _Galaxy Wars _collectible. He had blown all his savings on it and spent an entire weekend building a special shelf above his bed for it to rest on. He couldn't dream of giving it up.

But he knew Sam would absolutely love that case for her beloved giant fork. And he desperately wanted to make their first Christmas together as a couple a special one.

"So do we have a deal?" the cashier asked.

"Alright," Freddie said heavily. "You've got it."

…..

"You know, sometimes I think I like Christmas Eve more than Christmas itself," Carly said happily, setting down a tray full of hot cocoa mugs on the coffee table. "Sitting around with friends and family, drinking hot chocolate, watching cheesy holiday movies, eating Christmas cookies…"  
"Yeah, but on Christmas you get _presents_," Sam reminded her, grabbing a mug. "And everyone knows that the best part of any holiday."

"Way to kill the moment," Carly sighed. "But speaking of presents…is everyone ready to exchange secret Santa gifts?"

"Yup!" T-Bo nodded. "Oh man, this is better my old college teddy bear fights!"

"Alright, I'll go first," Carly smiled, pulling out a small wrapped box. "I picked T-Bo."

"Ha! And I'm first!" T-Bo said excitedly, taking the present. He unwrapped the box and opened it up to reveal a pair of earplugs.

"Earplugs?" T-Bo frowned.

"Industrial strength earplugs," Carly explained. "I got them for you because I know how horrible it is to wake up twice a night to Mrs. Benson's fire drills. Now you can sleep through all her sirens and yelling."

"What? No way!" T-Bo explained. "This is fantastic! Now I can finally get my beauty sleep again. All these fire drills have really been taking a toll on my silky skin."

"Maybe I should invest in a pair of those," Freddie chuckled.

"Me next!" Spencer said, jumping up and pulling out a gift bag from behind the couch. "I had my wonderful little sister, Carly!"

"Aw," Carly grinned. She opened up the bag and pulled out a black pair of studded boats. "Whoa! These are so cute!"

"You mean you found a pair of boats that she _doesn't _already own?" Sam laughed.

"Hey, I don't have that many pairs," Carly defended.

"Please, you have more pairs of boats than my cat," Gibby said. "And he has four feet!"

"Well I love these, Spencer," Carly said, hugging her brother. "So thank you."

"Anytime, kid," Spencer said.

"Okay, looks like I'm up," Gibby said. He tossed Spencer a package.

"Alright!" Spencer cheered, tearing off the wrapping paper like a young child. "It's…fire retardant underwear?"

"Yeah, I figured if anyone could use that, it would be you," Gibby nodded.

"Have you actually set your underwear on fire before?" Freddie frowned.

"No!" Spencer snapped.

"Well you did come pretty close that one time," Carly pointed out. "When you were trying to-"

"Hey! We're not speaking about that!" Spencer hissed.

"That's messed up, man," T-Bo said, shaking his head as he pulled out his own present and handed it to Gibby.

Gibby opened up the gift bag and pulled out a large cup. "Wow…it's a…cup," Gibby said.

"A special Jamaican cup!" T-Bo said. "That's top of the line plastic! You know how expensive plastic like that is?"

"Thirty-six bucks," Freddie mumbled darkly.

"Plus," T-Bo continued. "Every time you bring that to the Groovy Smoothie, you get four percent off your purchase."

"Shut up, no way!" Gibby gasped.

"True chiz," T-Bo nodded.

"Think of the savings!" Gibby exclaimed.

"Yeah, I'm sure you'll save a ton," Carly said slowly. "Okay, well, since only Sam and Freddie are left now, I guess they picked each other's names."

"Huh, what are the odds of _that_?" Spencer commented.

"Let's just do this," Sam said, trying not to look excited about seeing the look on Freddie's face when he opened his present. She pulled out her gift and handed to Freddie. Freddie handed her a large wrapped box.

"Why don't you guys open them at the same time?" Carly suggested.

"Fine with me," Freddie shrugged.

"Me too," Sam agreed. "On the count of three…One, two, three!"

The couple pulled the paper off of their presents.

"Whoa," Freddie breathed, staring down at the golden handle in his hand. "Is this the Golden Handle of Panthatar?"

"Uh-huh," Sam grinned.

"Oh my God," Freddie said. "Sam, this is one of the rarest pieces of _Galaxy Wars _paraphernalia."

"I've heard," Sam mumbled.

Freddie looked down at the handle. It would look great on his Lou Groundrunner Light Sword! And then he remembered that he no longer owned that prop…

Sam examined her own gift from Freddie.

"Is it some sort of safe?" she asked.

"Not just a safe," Freddie said. "It has one of the highest-tech security systems ever installed on it. I programmed it to respond only to your voice and I put in a special security code. Here, let me show you."  
He quickly typed in the code onto the keypad on the front of the case and opened it up. "It's for your giant fork, baby! I know how much you love that thing, and I want you to be able keep it safe."

"Freddie, this is amazing!" Sam exclaimed. "Now I can keep people's grimy hand off of my-"

But then she remembered that her precious fork was currently in the possession of the comic book store owner.

"What's wrong?" Freddie frowned, noticing Sam's smile flickering.

"N-Nothing," Sam said quickly. "I love this." She leaned over and kissed him. "So do you like your fancy handle thing?"

"It's-It's great," Freddie said. "But hey, why don't you see how your fork looks in the case?"

"Maybe later," Sam said. "I really want to see what your Light Sword thingy looks with that handle on."

"Since when do you want to see my _Galaxy Wars _stuff?"

"Since now!"

"First let me see your fork in the case, baby," Freddie said.

"After you show me the Light Sword."

Freddie took a deep breath. Knowing his girlfriend, he wasn't going to get anywhere in this argument until he told Sam what really happened to his Light Sword.

"Okay, look, baby, don't get mad," Freddie began.

"You don't like it?" Sam asked, her face dropping.

"No!" Freddie said. "I-I love this. It's the best Christmas present I've ever gotten. But, well, I-I sort of had to trade my Lou Groundrunner Light Sword to get you that case for your fork."

"What? You _traded _that Light Sword?" Spencer exclaimed, his eyes widening. "Dude! That's a one-of-a-kind collectable!"

"You-You gave up your lame _Galaxy Wars _toy to get me my present?" Sam whispered.

"I just wanted to get you something perfect," Freddie sighed.

To his surprise, Sam began to laugh.

"What?" Freddie said. "What's so funny."

"Baby," Sam said, smiling at him. "I had to trade my giant fork to get you that handle."

"You traded your fork?" Carly frowned, nearly choking on her hot chocolate. "Sam! You take better care of that thing then you do yourself!"

"Sam…you gave up that fork?" Freddie said, hardly daring to believe her gesture.

Sam shrugged. "I wanted to make sure you got the best Christmas present ever."

Freddie chuckled. "Hey," he said. "I already have the best Christmas present I could ever ask for. You. You're all I want, Sam."

"Okay!" Spencer said loudly, getting to his feet. "I'm going to go try out my new underwear before I gag from all the teen romance going on out here."

"Yeah, like the thought of you in your underwear isn't enough to make anyone gag," Sam smirked.

"Hey!"


	395. Chapter 395

_Riot_

"I still can't believe you and Freddie have been together for ten months," Carly smiled, helping Sam with the clasp of a silver necklace.

"Me neither," Sam said honestly, staring at her dolled up reflection in the mirror in Carly's bedroom, where her best friend was helping her prepare for her date.

"So," Carly said. "Where's Freddie taking you on this big date?"

"He's taking me to the aquarium," Sam said.

"The aquarium?" Carly repeated. "Wow, talk about an unusual date."

"I know," Sam nodded. "We usually just go out for dinner or a movie on our dates. I was totally shocked when he told me we were gonna do this instead."

"Well I think it's sweet that your boyfriend is being spontaneous," Carly said. "I just wish I had someone to take me on cute dates like that."

"Hey, come on kid, you're hot!" Sam said. "And for your information, you had a date just last week!"

"Yes, and he wound up spilling marinara sauce all over me before I could even get to know him," Carly said.

"That's horrible," Sam cringed.

"I know!"

"What a total waste of marinara sauce," Sam said, shaking her head in disgust.  
"Yeah, _that _was the problem," Carly scoffed. "Not the giant stain on my brand new white dress! But hey, have fun tonight, okay? And I want details the second you get back."

"Will do," Sam promised. "You know, I haven't been to an aquarium in years. Not since I got banned from one when I was seven."

"Banned?" Carly frowned. "Why'd you get banned?"

"Oh, see, I really wanted to see if I could get the clown fish to-"

"You know what? I don't think I want to know," Carly said quickly.

…

"You know, baby," Sam said as her and Freddie walked through the aquarium, looking at the many types of fish. "You may be sort of lame. And a dork. And totally nubbish. And a-"

"Are you going somewhere with this?" Freddie asked, rolling his eyes.

"But you still know how to pull off a pretty awesome ten-month anniversary date," Sam grinned, leaning up to kiss him.

"You really like it?" Freddie asked.

"Duh," Sam nodded. "Going to an aquarium is a lot better than just going to some snooty restaurant…But hey, there _is _still gonna be food at some point tonight, right?"

"Sam, I've been with you for ten months," Freddie said. "Do you really think I'd plan a date and not include food? There's a small café across the street from here I figured we could stop by."

"Nice," Sam said approvingly. "So do you know when feeding time is at the shark tanks? I really want to-"

"Whoa!" said a voice suddenly behind the couple.

Sam and Freddie turned around and saw two girls.

"Um…hello," Freddie said, not recognizing the girls.

"You're Sam and Freddie from iCarly!" the first girl squealed.

"Oh, yeah," Sam shrugged. She never exactly loved being recognized on a normal day, but tonight she found it especially annoying, since her and Freddie were on a date. But she bit her tongue.

"Is Carly here too?" the second girl ask.

"Um, no, she's-" Freddie began. "She's-"

"Wait," the first girl said slowly, looking down at Sam and Freddie's hands, which the couple just realized were still entwined. "Are-Are you guys here on a _date_?"

Sam and Freddie hadn't announced their relationship on iCarly yet. They both decided they wanted to wait at least a year before doing so, to give them a chance to enjoy each other with having to deal with any crazy fans.

Sam and Freddie exchanged quick glanced.

"Okay, yes," Freddie nodded. "But see, we'd really appreciate it if you girls would-"

"Oh no!" the second girl cried. "Does that mean Creddie is dead?"

"No!" the first girl moaned. "Creddie was such a perfect couple!"  
"Freddie? Don't you know how happy you could be with Carly?"

"Creddie rules!"

"You've _got _to be kidding me," Sam mumbled.

"I'm perfectly happy with Sam, thank you very much," Freddie said firmly, narrowing his eyes. "Now if you'll excuse us, we're going to go see the shark exhibit."

"But what about Creddie?" one of the girls yelled after them as they turned to walk away.

"Creddie for the win!"

"Wow," Sam said as the girls cries faded away. "Guess this place doesn't have a no nut case policy."

"You okay?" Freddie asked her.

"Huh? Why wouldn't I be okay?"

"You know," Freddie said. "Because those girls were sort of…"

"Dude, I don't care what those lame iCarly fans say," Sam said. "I mean we see stuff on the website every week about how in love you are with Carly because you laughed at something she said."

"Okay," Freddie nodded.

The couple made their way over to the shark tanks.

"Man, those things are huge," Sam commented, watching the large sharks swimming around.

"I know," Freddie agreed, putting his arm around her. "Hey, do you think they-"

"Okay, Freddie, hear us out," the two Creddie fans said, rushing up to the couple out of nowhere.

"We get that you may be a little confused right now," the first girl said.

"But we know that if you look deep down into your heart, you'll realize that Carly really is the only girl for you," the second girl finished.

Sam felt her fist clench. She knew Freddie would probably be upset with her if she knocked those two girls out in the middle of their date, but it was getting pretty hard to resist the temptation.

"I'm not confused about anything," Freddie said, trying to keep his cool. "I don't have feelings for Carly, so I'm not going to date Carly. I'm in love with Sam, so I'll _continue _to date _her_."

"But Freddie, Carly's such a better pick for you," the first girl said. "We know you'd be so much happier with-"

"Let's get out of here," Sam muttered, grabbing Freddie's hand. She shoved past the two girls, hard, and led her boyfriend out of the aquarium.

"Sam," Freddie said, watching as Sam stormed out onto the sidewalk. "Sam, I know that those two girls were totally out of line. But don't let what they said get to you. None of it's true."

"I know that!" Sam snapped, turning away from him.

"Then why are you getting so upset?  
"I'm not upset!"

"Baby," Freddie said gently, pushing back a strand of her hair. "You can talk to me. You know that right?"

Sam sighed and looked down at her shoes. "Do you ever, you know, think about it?"

"Think about what?" Freddie frowned.

"What it would be like if you wound up with Carly instead of me," she whispered.

Freddie shook his head. "No."

"Come on, not even once?" Sam scoffed.

"No, I've never had a reason to," Freddie said honestly.

"You never thought about what it would be like to have Carly Shay as your girlfriend?" Sam said, her voice filled with disbelief.

"Okay, maybe when I was thirteen," Freddie shrugged. "But you know those weren't real feeling back then."

"I know," Sam said, shaking her head. "Sorry…"

"But do you know what?" Freddie continued, taking her hands in his. "If I wound up with Carly instead of you, my life would be so different. I'd never have anyone to argue with about movies because Carly would always let me pick what I wanted to see. I would've never experienced how amazing bacon-wrapped ribs are because Carly would never even come close to those things. I would've never landed a seat on the debate team this year because I wouldn't have gotten so much practice arguing. My life would've been so…simple. But now with you, there's never a dull second. You keep me on my toes. And I absolutely _love _that. And you. I don't care if I get bombarded by a riot of Creddie fans telling me how _perfect _I'd be with Carly; I know that my life couldn't get any more perfect than it is right now."

Sam smiled and kissed him. "No one's ever told me anything like that before."

"I'll tell you that every day if you want me to," Freddie said.

Sam chuckled. "Let's not get carried away," she said. "I may wind up puking from all the gushiness."

"Fair enough," Freddie laughed. "Now do you want to go back inside? I think they're going to dump the shark chum into the tanks in a few minutes."

"Shoosh yeah!" Sam nodded. "Let's go, Benson!"

"After all," Freddie grinned. "What's a ten-month anniversary without watching sharks viciously tear into fish guts?"


	396. Chapter 396

_Railroad_

"Okay, Sam, I've finished packing all of Jason's things," Freddie said, coming into his and Sam's bedroom, where Sam was playing with their three-year old son on their bed. "I called and confirmed our reservations at the hotel, filled up the car with gas for the trip, made sure that Carly had her spare key so she could bring in our mail while we're away. Did you pack all of _your _stuff?"

"Huh?" Sam asked, looking up. "Oh, no. I'll get to it tomorrow."

"We _leave _tomorrow, Sam!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Oh calm down," Sam said. "I'll do it…eventually."

"Tomorrow's vacation day!" Jason said excitedly, jumping up and down on the bed.

"That's right," Freddie nodded, scooping the toddler up in his arms. "But you know what? We can't go on vacation tomorrow if mommy doesn't pack."

Jason gasped and turned to Sam. "Mommy! Pack!"

Sam glared at Freddie. "That was a low blow, Benson."

"Hey, I didn't do anything," Freddie smirked triumphantly. "I'm not saying you _have _to pack right now. But if you want disappoint poor, excited little Jason, then-"

"Oh can it!" Sam snapped, getting up and heading to her closet to pull out her suitcase.

"Alrighty then," Freddie said happily. "Come on, Jason. Let's leave mommy alone so she can pack for tomorrow."

"Vacation!" Jason cheered excitedly. "Vacation! Vacation! Yay!"

…

"How much longer?"

"I told you," Freddie sighed, gripping the steering wheel. "At least another hour."

"An _hour_? That's forever!"

"Sam, you're acting worse than Jason," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Well I'm _bored_," Sam moaned. "I knew you should've let me drive. We would've been there by now!"

"Yeah, and we would've probably had 500 dollars worth of speeding fines too," Freddie chuckled.

"Watch it, nub," Sam warned.

"Come on, baby, don't get all mad during our first family vacation with Jason," Freddie said.

Sam looked back at her sleeping son in the backseat of the car.

"Fine," she conceded. "I'll _try _not to get mad about your insanely slow driving."

"Thank you," Freddie said. "You know, this is _our_ first vacation in awhile too. We haven't gone anywhere since the year before Jason was born."

"Oh yeah," Sam nodded. "We went to Italy."

"That was nice," Freddie smiled. "Real romantic."

"Yeah, well, I doubt we can spend this vacation laying in bed all day drinking fancy wine and watching movies," Sam pointed out.

"Probably wouldn't work out too well with a three-year old running around," Freddie chuckled. "But it's still gonna be fun."

"I know," Sam said. "Jason's really going to love the beach house we're staying at. And we can take him to that boardwalk with all the cool games and rides. Oh, and we've _got _to take him to that crab leg shack. They're supposed to have the best seafood on the planet. And I bet there's a lot of ice cream shops around there. And they probably have churros! And-"

"Sam, calm down, you'll get your food," Freddie said, amused. "But we should also check out the history of the place too."

"History?" Sam repeated in a disgusted tone.

"Yeah," Freddie said. "Those small little beach towns are filled with history. We can check out some of the rock formations, go to the ship museum, tour the lighthouse, learn about the tide pools. Oh, and there's supposed to be an old railroad just outside the town we can visit!"

"In case you didn't know, nub, vacations are supposed to be fun," Sam said. "Not _educational_."

"Education can be fun."

"Yeah, sure, and root canals can be painless," Sam mumbled.

"Look, let's just do everything, okay?" Freddie said. "We'll be here for the whole weekend. We can go to the boardwalk for you and we'll do the educational things for me."

"Fine," Sam conceded. "We'll _compromise_. You happy?"

"Thrilled," Freddie said, satisfied.

…..

"Isn't this a cool place, Jason?" Freddie asked the next morning, opening the blinds of the window in the beach house him and Sam had rented for the weekend. It had a perfect view of the white sand and crystal blue waves.

"Yeah!" Jason nodded, pressing his nose against the window. "Can I make a sandcastle?"

"Sure, we'll be at the beach for a couple hours, you'll have time," Freddie nodded. "And then we get to a fun museum before stopping at the boardwalk."

"My sandcastle's gonna be big," Jason said, ignoring his father. "And I'm gonna be the king of it."

"You guys ready?" Sam asked, coming into the room wearing a pair of shorts and a bright red bikini top.

"Well don't you look good," Freddie smirked, walking over to his wife and giving her a kiss.

"Try not to drool, Fredwad," Sam grinned, grabbing a tank top from her beach bag on the counter and pulling it on. "So how about this? We stay at the beach for two hours, grab lunch at the crab shack before going to your stupid museum. Then we can stop at the boardwalk afterwards so I can go on the giant roller costar there, and then we'll drive by that railroad on our way back here."

"Sounds good to me," Freddie nodded.

"Beach time?" Jason asked, looking up at his parents.

"Yes, Jason," Sam laughed, taking the three-year olds hand. "It's beach time."

Freddie opened the sliding glass door in the living room and him, Sam and Jason stepped out onto the beach.

The family found a spot where the sun was shining down and laid out their towels.

"You want to go into the ocean, Jason?" Freddie asked.

"No," Jason said, pulling out his bucket and shovel Sam had packed for him. "I want to build a sandcastle."

"Okay," Sam nodded, sitting down on her towel so she could keep an eye on her son. "You need any help?"

"No," Jason shook his head. "I want to build it all on my own."

"If you insist," Sam said.

"Look at this cool brochure I printed off from the Internet about that ship museum," Freddie said, sitting down next to Sam and Jason began to build. "It's supposed to have four flours, forty-six show rooms and a gift shop where you can buy your own captain's hat."

"What would you do with a captain's hat?" Sam asked.

"You know, wear it when I race remote control boats with Gibby and Spencer," Freddie shrugged.

"Well I can't wait for the board walk tonight," Sam said. "That roller costar, the Skull Bruiser, is supposed to have the steepest drops in the country! Plus they say you're upside down for almost the entire ride!"

"Wow…I think I'll definitely sit that one out then," Freddie said.

"Wimp," Sam smirked.

…..

Two hours later, Sam and Freddie were quite ready to leave the beach. True, they both enjoyed being out in the sea air, but they were both excited to move onto their respective activities.

"Okay Jason, time to go," Sam said, getting up off her towel.

"No," Jason frowned. "I'm still building my sandcastle!"

"Jason, you've been building for two hours," Freddie said. "Don't you want to go to a nice museum now?"

"No," Jason said firmly. "My castle has to be bigger!"

"See, even he knows that museum was a lame idea," Sam said. "Jason wants to go to the boardwalk, don't you sweetie?"

"No, I want to stay at the beach!" Jason said. "I love the beach!"

Sam and Freddie looked at each other.

"Okay," Sam told him. "We'll stay."

"Just for one more hour," Freddie said. "And then you have to say bye-bye to the beach."

…

"Hey!" Carly grinned Sunday evening, as Sam, Freddie and Jason walked back into their home. "How was the vacation?"

"I built the biggest sandcastle ever, Aunt Carly!" Jason said excitedly. "Show her, mommy!"

"Yup, he built a pretty big one," Sam said, pulling out her Pearphone and showing Carly the picture she took of it.

"Whoa, this is even better than the sandcastle Uncle Spencer made that won first place in his big sandcastle building contest," Carly said.

"Jason, why don't you bring your bag upstairs and start unpacking your souvenirs," Freddie said.

"Okay!" Jason said, hurrying up to his bedroom.

"Did you guys have fun?" Carly asked.

"Yeah," Sam nodded.

"Well what'd you do?" Carly asked. "I bet you rode that Skull Bruiser ride at the boardwalk a million times, Sam."

"Actually, we never even made it to the boardwalk," Sam sighed.

"Or my ship museum," Freddie added.

"Why not?" Carly frowned. "You were gone for a whole weekend; didn't you have time?"

"Oh we had time," Sam said. "But we also had a three-year old who was very set on staying at the beach until he finished building his masterpiece of a sandcastle."

"We couldn't get him to leave," Freddie said. "Thank God the place we were staying at was on the beach or we probably would've had to sleep out on the sand."

"Aw," Carly chuckled. "That's kind of cute."

"Yeah, tell that to my sunburned back," Freddie winced.

"Yeah, and my neck is scorched," Sam said. "But besides from that…hanging out at the beach this whole weekend wasn't _too _horrible."

"I _did _get a lot of pictures for the Benson Family Album I'm starting," Freddie agreed.

"Oh God," Sam mumbled, rolling her eyes.


	397. Chapter 397

_Fix_

"So then you sprinkle the chocolate chips over the pepperoni slices," Sam explained, taking a handful of chocolate chips and pouring it onto her pizza. "Then you top this baby off with canned ham, animal crackers and tortilla chips. And voilà! You have a Sam Puckett Original Pizza."

"She used to put graham crackers on it before she thought of the animal crackers," Cat said. "Wait, Sam! You forgot the whipped cream!"

"Oh, good catch, Cat," Sam said, grabbing the can of whipped cream and spraying it all over the snack.

"Wow, baby, that looks so…appetizing," Freddie said, holding back a grimace as he watched his girlfriend chow down.

"That's nothing," Carly chuckled, taking a slice of plain cheese pizza. "When we were in the fifth grade, Sam used to make this one sandwich with ham, bacon, strawberry syrup, ketchup and cheese balls."

"Ew," Cat giggled.

"Oh yeah, the Sam Supreme," Sam grinned.

"You have the _strangest _eating habits," Freddie said, putting an arm around her.

"Well you'll have to learn to deal with them, nub," Sam smirked.

"I guess I will," Freddie chuckled, giving her a quick kiss.

Sam and Cat had come to Seattle from L.A. earlier that week to visit Carly and Freddie and take a break from the hustle and bustle of the babysitting service.

"So what do you guys want to do tonight?" Carly asked. "We could watch a movie or something."

"Yeah! I brought my favorite DVD with me!" Cat exclaimed, grabbing her bag and pulling out a DVD case with a giraffe on it.

"No!" Sam said loudly. "Not that stupid giraffe movie again!"

"But I love the giraffe!"

"You put on that giraffe movie and you see what happens to your little purple giraffe," Sam said.

Cat squeaked and covered her mouth with her hands.

"So…no movie then," Carly said slowly. "Hey, I have an idea! I have a ton of old magazines up in my room. Wouldn't it be fun to take all of those little quizzes in the back of them?"

"I love those!" Cat cried. "They're so accurate. One time I took a quiz that told me that I was going to find my soul creature behind a dumpster and it would give me back the purse that my brother stole for his 'experiment'."

"Was it _right_?" Sam frowned.

"Not completely, but I found half a cheese sandwich behind the dumpster, so it was kind of right," Cat replied.

The other three stared blankly at her.

"My soul animal is a monkey. Monkeys love cheese sandwiches!" Cat said as if it was obvious.

"They do not," Sam said, amused.

"Do too! Haven't you ever wondered why all the fancy cheese I buy always goes missing at our place?"

"Um…okay, so about those quizzes?" Sam said quickly, turning back to Carly.

Carly let out a small laugh. "I'll go run upstairs and grab them."

"Well, hopefully no one will ask what I did this Saturday night," Freddie said as Carly hurried up the steps. "Otherwise I'll have to say I spent the night taking quizzes out of fashion magazines."

"You could just say you spent Saturday with your hot girlfriend," Sam smirked, thumping the back of his head.

"Hmm, that _does _sound slightly less-lame," Freddie grinned.

"Yeah, and it's not like you need to _add _anymore lameness to yourself, baby," Sam said.

"Hey, Sam?" Cat asked. "How come you always insult Freddie when you're together, but when we're back in L.A. you always say how much you miss him and say how great he is?"

"_Cat_!" Sam hissed as Freddie grinned triumphantly. "What part of the phrase 'this doesn't leave the apartment' do you not understand? You're not supposed to _repeat _what I say about the nub!"

"Oh, I thought you said 'this doesn't leave _an_ apartment," Cat said. "I thought I was allowed to say it because we're in this apartment."

"Why would I say _an _apartment?" Sam exclaimed. "That doesn't even make any sense!"

"You're the one who said it," Cat shrugged.

"I didn't say it!"

"Sam, calm down," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "It's not that big of a deal. So you apparently swoon over me while you're in L.A-"

"Watch it, Fredbug," Sam warned him.

"Alright, I'm back!" Carly said cheerfully, coming back into the room with an armful of magazines. "Which quiz should we take first?"

"Whichever one floats your boat, kid," Sam said.

"Hey, this one seems interesting," Carly said, flipping through the pages of one of the magazines. "It's a quiz to see how well you know one of your friends. Why don't Cat and I take it to see how well we know Sam? That would be pretty cool, don't you think, Cat?"

"Yeah!" Cat nodded.

"Hey, what about me?" Freddie frowned. "Don't I at least get to be included in these quizzes?"

"This is for girls only," Carly explained. "You would need to take this quiz right here: How well does your guy know you? And you'd obviously get them all right. They're all stupid questions like what's Sam's favorite color and when her birthday is. Besides, we need someone to ask the questions for Cat and I."

"Okay," Freddie sighed, taking the magazine from Carly.

"It's not like you'd be doing anything else right now," Sam said, smiling up at her boyfriend.

"Insult me all you want, Puckett, Cat already told me how much you _love _me," Freddie said simply.

"Wait, what?" Carly frowned.

"Can we get on with the test?" Sam snapped as Carly handed Cat a pad of paper and a pen.

"Okay, okay," Freddie said. "Question number one, what is Sam's biggest fear?"

"Pfft, easy," Carly chuckled, scribbling down her answer.

"Alright, question two," Freddie continued. "If Sam could have any animal in the world as a pet, what would it be?"

"Wow, and this test was supposed to be super hard," Carly said, shaking her head as her and Cat wrote their responses.

"Number three," Freddie said. "What is Sam's favorite _legal _hobby?"

"It does not say legal," Sam scoffed, looking over Freddie's shoulder.

"I know, but I don't think it's a good idea to have your _questionable _hobbies written down on paper," Freddie said. "Could leave a trail."

"Aw, baby, I've trained you well," Sam grinned.

"Can we get on with the test please?" Carly asked just as Sam was about kiss Freddie. "We all know you're a young couple in love and blah, blah, blah."

"Fine," Freddie sighed. "Question four: What is Sam's absolute favorite food? And for the record, 'all of them' is not an acceptable answer."

"It's accurate, though," Sam shrugged.

"And the last question," Freddie announced, ignoring Sam's comment. "Who is Sam's celebrity crush?"

"Done," Carly said, tossing her pad of paper to Freddie. "That was a piece of cake."

"You done Cat?" Freddie asked.

"Uh-huh," Cat said brightly, handing her paper to Freddie.

"Okay, and now Sam will answer these questions herself, and I'll check and see if you got them right," Freddie explained. "Okay Sam, what is your biggest fear?"

"Hmm, my biggest fear is…accidently locking my motorcycle keys in a pickle jar and not being able to get them out."

"What?" Freddie frowned. "Has that _happened_?"

"Maybe," Sam said.

"Alrighty then," Freddie said, shaking his head. "Let's see if Cat and Carly got that. Carly put…finding one of Gibby's back hairs in your food."

"Oh, that was a close second," Sam said, giving a visible shudder.

"Why do you not have normal fears?" Freddie asked, amused. "Like spiders or sharks or something? Anyway, Cat put…losing your motorcycle keys in a pickle jar."

"Boo-yah!" Cat said excitedly, pumping her fist in the air. "Hey, if you ever lose your keys in there again, Sam, we can always do what we did last time to get them out."

"Oh yeah," Sam laughed. "But I don't think Dice would forgive us this time. I still owe him a new toothbrush and a pack of gummy worms."

"But-But don't you remember how scarred you were when you found three of Gibby's back hairs in your potato salad last year?" Carly frowned. "You didn't eat for almost five hours after that!"

"Trust me, Carls, that's nowhere near the horror of thinking you'll never get to ride your motorcycle because the keys for it are slowly soaking away in brine," Sam said.

"Um, alright, question two," Freddie said quickly. "Sam, if you could have any animal, what would it be?"

"Easy," Sam replied at once. "A hippopotamus."

"And let's see what Carly said," Freddie said, looking through the papers. "She said a pig."

"Yeah, haven't you always talked about starting a pig farm so you could always have a supply of bacon and ham and sausage?" Carly said.

"I know, but how am I supposed to eat the pigs after living with them?" Sam pointed out. "That could totally ruin my love of meat!"

"And we wouldn't want that," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Well, Cat got this question right too. She put hippopotamus."

"He-he, isn't that fun to say?" Cat asked happily. "_Hippopotamus_. Hip-po-pot-a-mus. Hip-Hip-Hippo! Hip-"

"Enough hipping!" Sam said, throwing a pillow at the redhead.

"Onto the next question," Freddie went on. "Baby, what's your favorite hobby?"

"Guess I'm gonna have to go with speed texting," Sam answered.

"Speed texting?" Carly exclaimed. "What the heck is that?"

"Oh see, it's actually this really cool competition thing that-"

"Yay! I got that one right!" Cat cheered.

"So moving on," Freddie said as Carly pursed her lips. "You're favorite food, Sam?"

"Cat's Nona's meatballs," Sam answered at once. "Man, I _knew _I should've brought more of those up here with me!"

"But-But what about Fat Cakes?" Carly asked. "I've seen you practically _burry_ yourself in those things!"

"Yeah, but those meatballs…" Sam said dreamily. "They've got a ton of flavor, just like Fat Cakes do, but more meaty and saucy."

"Well, um, Cat got that one too," Freddie said. "So now the last question! Who is your celebrity crush?"

"Oh! That one guy who used to be on _That's a Drag_," Sam said. "Philip Grey!"

"Philip Grey?" Freddie scoffed. "That guy's stupid."

"Jealous?" Sam smirked.

"No!" Freddie said. "Not even a little."

"Sure," Sam chuckled. "So did either of them get that one right?"

"Let's see…Cat did," Freddie nodded. "Carly put-"

"Luke Anderson," Carly finished for him. "You know, the drummer from Cuddlefish! I though you were totally into him! You used to have his picture in your locker and everything."

"Yeah, but then he grew that weird beard thing," Sam cringed. "Totally ruined it for me."

"Well, looks like Cat wins that round," Freddie said.

"Yeah! Whoo!" Cat cried, jumping up and wrapping her arms around Sam. "Roommate power!"

"I told you I was never going to say that," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "And what did we agree about the hugging?"

"You said five times a year, and I've only done it three times," Cat said.

"Fine," Sam sighed, hugging the girl back.

"Um, I-I think I'm going to run back up to my room and grab a blanket," Carly mumbled. "It's a little chilly down here."

"Well now that that's done," Freddie said as Sam and Cat pulled away. "What are we going to do next? Oh! How about I go get my chess set from across the hall and we have a tournament."

"Is chess the one with the ladders and slides?" Cat asked.

"No!" Sam said. She turned back to Freddie. "And even if that sounded _remotely _entertaining, Carly and I have a whole season of _America Sings _to catch up on."

"Ugh, I hate that show," Freddie moaned.

"We know, that's why we're watching it tonight," Sam replied simply.

"My brother tried to get on that show when he was sixteen," Cat spoke up. "But he knocked over all of the judges' Moca Cola and tried to get them to sniff his rash."

"Your brother sounds really…interesting," Freddie commented.

"No, he's just weird," Cat giggled.

"Hey, what's taking Carly so long?" Sam frowned. "She's been up there for five minutes. I thought she was just grabbing a blanket."

"I dunno," Freddie shrugged. "She probably stopped at the bathroom or something."

Sam bit her lip. "Maybe..." Then she lowered her voice so only Freddie could hear her. "Hey, was it just me, or did Carly seem a little…off during that whole quiz thing?"

"Actually, yeah, it looked like she was upset about something," Freddie nodded. "Should we go up and see if she's okay?"

"Yeah," Sam said. She looked over at Cat. "Hey Cat, Fredweiner and I are gonna run upstairs for a second. We'll be back in a sec."

"Kay kay!" Cat chirped.

Sam and Freddie left Cat and headed upstairs to Carly's room.

Carly was sitting on her bed, her chin in her hand, playing with her phone, looking very distracted.

"Carls?" Sam said as her and Freddie walked in.

"Huh? Oh, um, I-I'm coming down," Carly said, jumping to her feet and grabbing a blanket off of her bed.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Sam asked.

"Nothing," Carly said quickly.

"Come on, Carly, you seemed a little…upset down there," Freddie said.

"Yeah, so what's eating you, kid?" Sam asked.

"Look, it's nothing," Carly sighed. "It's stupid."

"Carly, I once tried to chug an entire Super Slurp from the gas station in under thirty seconds," Sam reminded her. "_Nothing_ is stupider than that. So spill."

"Guys, seriously, it's nothing," Carly said, plastering a smile on her face.

"Shay…" Sam said knowingly.

"Okay, okay!" Carly said. "I just…I've lost my best friend status, okay?"

Sam and Freddie exchanged confused glances.

"What are you talking about?" Freddie frowned.

"Come on, you saw it down there," Carly sighed, sitting back down on her bed. "Cat totally annihilated me on that best friend quiz. She knew everything about Sam and I couldn't even answer one question."

"Wait, is _that _why you're wazzed off?" Sam laughed. "Dude! That's crazy!"

"It's not crazy!" Carly snapped. "I-I just didn't know that you and Cat were _that _close. I thought that you and I were still each others' best friend."

"You're still my best friend," Sam said.

"Not a very good one," Carly muttered.

"Carly, please," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Just because Cat beat you at one stupid magazine quiz doesn't make her my best friend. Sure, Cat and I are pretty close because we're roommates and we have that babysitting gig back in L.A. and yes, we're good friends, but she didn't replace you."

"But she knows practically everything about you after barely a year," Carly pointed out. "It's only a matter of time before she pushes me out."

"Carls, Cat doesn't know everything about me," Sam scoffed. "First of all, she _still _gets my last name wrong. She insists that it's Puckle. _You _knew how to spell my last name before I did!"

"Didn't you two meet in like the third grade?" Freddie asked.

"It's a tricky name, okay?" Sam defended. She turned back to Carly. "Look, Cat knows about things in my life _now_. She doesn't know anything about what I was like in high school or before iCarly or back in the third grade when _we_ met. She doesn't know the important stuff. She doesn't know how I used to practically live here because I would always fight with my mom. She doesn't know that I've never even met my dad. She doesn't know I almost had to repeat the sixth grade or that I used to be a pageant girl or that I like to sing sometimes. That's stuff only a best friend would know."

"You know," Freddie said, sitting down next to the girls. "That test was kind of stupid. It only tested how well you knew Sam based on recent things. And you guys _have _been apart for a year. I bet if Sam took that same test about Carly with some girl she became friends with in Italy, the same thing would've happened."

"It's true," Sam nodded. "Heck, I brought you three pints of this _amazing _ice cream my friend, Dice, got from some guy in a back alley only to find out that you only eat _gelato _now. And you grew out your bangs even though you said you would _never _let that happen after your seventh grade picture day disaster and this morning I come downstairs and I see you underneath the kitchen sink fixing a pipe! Since when does Carly Shay know how to do _anything _with tools?"

"The plumbing was pretty bad in Italy," Carly mumbled. "I _had _to learn."

"See, you guys both don't know _everything _that's happened to each other the past year," Freddie said. "But that's only because you have been living in different countries! You're still best friends even if you don't know a few extra details. Besides, you have this whole week to catch up. I'm sure by the time Sam's ready to go back to L.A. and Carly's on her way back to Italy, you two will know every detail of each other's lives just like before."

Carly looked at Sam. "Your boyfriend may have a point."

"Jeez, Carls, don't tell him that, it'll go to his head," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

Carly laughed.

"So you feel better now?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "It's just sort of weird, you know? Not hanging out with each other every day."

"I know," Sam agreed. "But hey, at least no one steals the food out of your fridge."

"True," Carly said. "And at least now no one stomps all over your fun, illegal ideas."

"That's right," Sam chuckled.

The two girls were silent for a moment, and then they both simultaneously threw their arms around each other.

"I missed you, Sam," Carly said.

"I missed you too, Carls," Sam replied.

Carly looked up over Sam's shoulder at Freddie. "Well? What are you waiting for, boy? Come here!"

Freddie grinned and put his arms around both of the girls, joining their embrace.


	398. Chapter 398

_Project_

"Hey guys! Come look at some of these old Christmas pictures I found down in the basement," Spencer said as Carly and Freddie entered the apartment.

"Oh, I want to see," Carly grinned, running over to her brother.

"See, here's me when I was eight sitting on Santa's lap at the mall," Spencer said, showing the two teens the photo. "Wasn't I precious?"

"What was that red gunk all over your face?" Freddie frowned.

"Not sure," Spencer said.

"Half of the old pictures we have of Spencer have him covered in _something_," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Aw! This one is of me when I was six on Christmas morning. Look at me unwrapping my Bambie Palace."

"Real cute, Carls," Freddie chuckled.

"Hey, you should see if your mom has some old Christmas pictures of you," Carly suggested. "I'd want to see them."

"Nah," Freddie said. "Most of those pictures involve my mom frantically grabbing my new toys and sanitizing them."

"Wow, your mom was a nutter even back then," Spencer said.

"Yes she was," Freddie agreed. "Anyway, you guys care if I start putting up some Christmas decorations over here? It's Christmas Eve, after all."

"Um, sure, but what decorations do you have?" Carly asked as she watched Freddie unzip his backpack and pull out a small cardboard box. "We already have that magnet tree and wreaths and Spencer's reindeer sculpture up."

"I know, but I just want to hang some of this stuff up," Freddie said, opening the box to reveal a few green plants.

"Is that mistletoe?" Spencer asked.

"Yup," Freddie nodded.

"Okay, I get it," Carly smiled, shaking her head. "You want to put that stuff up everywhere so you and Sam will have an excuse to make-out the whole night tonight."

"Not exactly," Freddie said. "See…I have sort of this plan, and I'm gonna need your help."

"What sort of plan?" Carly asked suspiciously.

"Well," Freddie said, taking a deep breath. "Since me and Sam are about to graduate from college in the spring, I figured it was the perfect time for me to…for me to-"

Carly gasped. "Oh my God! Are you going to-?"

Freddie nodded and reached into his pocket and pulled out a small velvet box. He opened it up to reveal a beautiful, sparkling diamond ring. "I'm going to ask her to marry me."

Carly squealed and threw her arms around him. "Oh, Freddie! I'm so happy for you guys!"

"Yeah man, congratulations," Spencer said, patting his shoulder.

"Thanks, but Sam _does _need to say yes first," Freddie pointed out.

"She will," Carly assured him. "She loves you."

"I love her too," Freddie said softly. "Which is why I want everything to go well tonight."

"What do you need us to do?" Spencer asked.

"Not that much," Freddie said. "Here's what I was thinking…"

….

"I can't believe this!" Sam exclaimed later that evening as her and Carly walked up the stairs to Spencer's apartment.

"Sam, calm down, it's not that big of a deal," Carly said.

"Not a big deal?" Sam repeated. "Carly, we are down in Seattle on a _relaxing, winter vacation_. The last thing I want to see when I check my email is a syllabus for a class I'm not even going to be in for another month!"

"The professor just wants you to be prepared," Carly reasoned.

"It's Christmas Eve!" Sam cried. "Man, I am _so _glad we graduate in the spring. I'm done with school. I can't wait to never open another textbook again."

"You don't open your textbooks now," Carly reminded her, digging in her pockets. "Oh, shoot. I think I forgot my key."

"It's cool, I'll just pick the lock," Sam said, grabbing a pin from her bag and kneeling down by the keyhole to get to work. "Anyway, I just think it's stupid that any professor would think we'd want to see anything about classes after we just finished up a semester."

She heard a click, signifying the door had unlocked. "There you go," she said, getting to her feet. "Door's unlocked and-Carly?"

It appeared that her best friend, who _had _been standing behind her, had suddenly vanished.

"Carly?" Sam frowned, looking around, but the brunette girl was nowhere in sight.

_Weird, _Sam thought to herself. _Maybe she left something in her car and went back down to grab it._

Sam opened the door to the Shay's apartment, expecting to see Spencer lounging around in his fancy elf pajamas. Instead, though, she was greeted by the sight of her boyfriend of five years standing in the middle of the living room.

"Um…what's going on?" Sam asked, looking around the apartment. All the lights were off and several candles lit the place up. A plate of her favorite Christmas cookies and a mug of hot chocolate were sitting on the coffee table. She looked up at the ceiling and saw four bushels of mistletoe hanging in a circle with a fifth bushel in the center.

"I just wanted to give you an early Christmas present," Freddie said, gently putting his arms around her and kissing her.

"Well okay," Sam smiled once they pulled apart. "What is it?"

"Patience, baby," Freddie told her, his eyes sparkling. "You realize that this will be our fifth Christmas together?"

"Oh yeah," Sam nodded. "Crazy, huh?"

"Definitely," Freddie agreed, giving her another kiss. He took her hands and led her under the first bushel of mistletoe. "You remember our first Christmas together? It was our senior year of high school, and we had just started going out. Neither of us knew what to get each other."

"I remember," Sam grinned. "Didn't we wind up trading our most prized possessions to try and get each other the perfect present?"

"Only to find out that what we got each was pretty much useless without them," Freddie laughed. He leaned down and kissed her deeply. "It was a pretty good Christmas still, though."

"Definitely," Sam nodded.

Freddie led her under the second bushel of mistletoe. "And do you remember our second Christmas? You and I just finished our first semester of college and we were completely broke."

"So we decided to make each other homemade presents," Sam finished for him.

"And you made me a clay pot and plastered it with all of the ticket stubs from the movies we saw together," Freddie said. "You know I still have that."

"Well I still have the collage you made me with all the pictures you insisted on taking of us," Sam replied. "And I'm guessing since we're standing under yet another thing of mistletoe…"

She stood on her toes and kissed him.

"I see you're catching on," Freddie said as they moved onto the third bushel. "And do you remember our third Christmas together?"

"Oh God," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Was that the one you made us spend with your mom?"

"Uh-huh," Freddie nodded. "Carly and Spencer were visiting their Dad in Alaska, so we didn't have any excuse not to. And of course, my mom was obnoxious."

"No chiz," Sam said. "All she did was criticize my hair and my clothes and say I wasn't ladylike enough for you."

"And you didn't throw anything at her," Freddie said proudly. "Not even once. I know how hard that was for you, baby. But after spending that day together, my mom _did _start to like you a _little _more."

"Well yippee," Sam mumbled, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

Freddie chuckled as he placed another kiss on her lips.

"And I know you remember our Christmas last year," Freddie said, leading Sam underneath the fourth bushel. "We planned a big ski trip, just the two of us. We were going to spend Christmas in a cozy little cabin with a warm fire and no interruptions."

"Yeah, that was the plan," Sam smirked. "Too bad it didn't happen."

"We wound up getting lost on the way to the cabin and spent four hours trudging through the snow after the car ran out of gas, freezing our butts off," Freddie said. "Only to find out that we had been going in circles the entire time."

"And there was a gas station about a mile away from us," Sam added.

"And as sucky as that Christmas was," Freddie continued. "It really showed me that you and I…we can get through anything."

"Yeah," Sam said softly. "Even though you almost cried at one point that night."

"You're never going to let me forget that, are you?" Freddie asked, rolling his eyes.

"Nope," Sam said, kissing him passionately.

Freddie reluctantly pulled away after a moment and led Sam underneath the fifth and final bushel of mistletoe.

"And now we're on our fifth Christmas together," he whispered. "And even though Christmas isn't until tomorrow, I already know that it's going to be an amazing one, because I'll be spending it with you. You can make every second, every day, every _year _we're together amazing, Sam, because you're you. You're the most beautiful, breath-taking, _wonderful _girl I could ever imagine. I don't know how I managed to wind up with someone like you, but I'm so glad I did. I can't wait to spend this Christmas with you, and the next one, and the one after that. I want to celebrate every Christmas with you. I want to celebrate every birthday, Thanksgiving, Fourth of July, Halloween, Groundhog Day…_everything_, with you. I don't want to spend a day without you, baby. I don't know what I would do if you weren't in my life because you _are _my life. I love you so much."

"I-I love you too," Sam said softly, her cheeks blushing furiously.

Freddie smiled at her before slowly getting down on one knee.

Sam's eyes grew wide and she covered her mouth with her hand. "Freddie?"

Freddie pulled out the velvet box from his pocket and opened it up to her, the diamond ring glistening in the candlelight. "Samantha Joy Puckett?" he asked. "Will you marry me?"

Sam stared down at the scene for a moment, completely overcome by the flood of emotions rushing through her. It took her a moment to gather herself enough to respond.

"Yes," she nodded, tears streaming down her face. "Yes, yes I'll marry you!"

Freddie's face broke out in the biggest grin he had ever grinned and quickly got to his feet and slid the ring onto her finger.

Sam wrapped her arms around his neck as Freddie swept her off her feet, kissing her full on the lips, knowing that there was no way he could ever be happier than he was now.

"She said yes!" a voice at the front door suddenly screamed, and the couple turned around to see Spencer and Carly standing at the doorway, beaming.

"Were you listening at the door?" Freddie asked knowingly.

"Duh!" Spencer exclaimed.

"Congratulations, you guys!" Carly said, hurrying over to her two best friends and giving them a hug. "I'm so happy for you two."

"Wait, did you guys know about this?" Sam asked.

"Freddie asked me to keep you out of here this afternoon," Carly explained. "So I took you shopping while him and Spencer worked on this little…project. Man, you have no idea how hard it was to keep this whole thing a secret."

"Yeah, you're pretty awful on keeping quiet about these things," Sam agreed.

"But now that you know…" Carly went on. "We can start the wedding planning process!"

"Oh boy…" Sam said, exchanging looks with Freddie.


	399. Chapter 399

_Dummy_

"Sam! You're adding too much barbecue sauce!" Freddie exclaimed as he watched his wife prepare chicken for their barbecue.

"It's called giving it flavor," Sam said. "No one wants to eat bland chicken like _you _make."

"My chicken is _fine_, isn't it girls?" Freddie defended.

"You're chicken tastes funny, daddy," seven-year old Emma replied.

"Mommy's tastes better," Ashton nodded.

The girls were sitting at the kitchen table, playing a computer game on Sam's laptop with Clarissa and Quincy. Carly and Gibby were at the Benson's house for lunch and were currently on the patio helping set the table out there.

"Boom!" Sam said triumphantly.

"But I still think that's way too much sauce, Sam," Freddie said. "Wouldn't it be nice to actually _taste _the chicken and not just the sauce?"

"Will you stop criticizing my food?"

"I'm not criticizing, I'm just-"

"Guys," Carly said, coming into the kitchen. "You realize that Gibby and I can hear you clear from outside. Don't you think after thirteen years of marriage, you should be a little better at communicating _without _yelling?"

"Well he's being stupid with the chicken!" Sam snapped.

"Mommy! Stupid's a bad word!" Ashton gasped.

"Yes, it is," Freddie said, smiling at his wife victoriously. "Now what do you think she should do to make up for that, Ash?"

"She should say sorry," Ashton said proudly.

"Well, you heard her," Freddie said, beaming. "Do you have anything to say to be, Samantha?"

Sam glared at him but bit her tongue. "Sorry for calling you stupid," she muttered.

"Thank you," Freddie said. "I accept your apology."

"You just wait until I have you alone," Sam mumbled under her breath.

"You two are really something," Carly said, shaking her head at the couple.

"Hey, you guys," Gibby said, joining everybody in the kitchen. "Guess what I just saw out in the backyard? These two squirrels started chasing each other around, and then one squirrel jumped on the other squirrel and-"

"Hey!" Carly exclaimed, swatting Gibby's shoulder. "There are _children_ here!"

"Oh, right," Gibby nodded.

"What did the squirrels do, dad?" Quincy asked.

"Were they wrestling?" Emma asked.

"Um, yeah sweetie," Sam nodded. "That's exactly what they were doing."

"So is the grill warmed up for this chicken?" Freddie asked Gibby. "Although I don't know if you can call it chicken anymore with the amount of sauce Sam put on it."

"You are _asking _for it, aren't you?" Sam frowned.

"Sam, please don't murder your husband tonight," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"We'll see," Sam said simply, grabbing the chicken and heading out to the patio.

"You're gonna get it tonight, man," Gibby said as Carly followed Sam out of the kitchen.

"Yup," Freddie sighed. "You'd think I'd have learned by now."

Him and Gibby headed out of the kitchen out of the girls, leaving the four children alone at the table.

"Emma, you've been hogging the game all day," Ashton moaned. "Give me, Clarissa and Quincy a turn!"

"But you guys aren't good at this game," Emma said.

"Yes we are!" Clarissa pouted.

"We're supposed to take turns, Emma," Quincy said.

"It's still my turn," Emma replied.

"You better start sharing, Emma," Ashton said. "Or I'm going to tell mommy and daddy on you."

"You're a tattletale," Emma frowned. She paused the game and pushed the laptop over to her sister, in the process accidently hitting Sam's favorite's list and causing the first site on the list to pop up.

"Hey! What happened to the game?" Ashton asked.

"You got rid of it, Emma," Quincy said. "And you brought us to a weird website…iCarly."

"That's my mom's name!" Clarissa said.

"Look Clarissa, that girl on the computer looks like your mom too," Emma said.

"And those two look like your mom and dad," Quincy said.

"And that guy looks like your dad, Quincy," Ashton said.

"What are you guys doing?" eleven-year old Jason asked, walking into the kitchen.

"Jason, look!" Emma said. "We found mommy and daddy on the computer. And Aunt Carly and Uncle Gibby too."

"Yeah, look!" Clarissa said.

"Come on, you probably just found people that _look _like them," Jason said. "What would they be doing on the Internet. Pfft, seven-year olds."

"Look!" Ashton insisted.

"Fine, I'll look, just to prove to you that those aren't our-oh hey, they _are _our parents."

"Told you," Emma said.

"What kind of website is this?" Jason asked curiously. "Looks pretty cool. It has some great graphics. I wonder what kind of programming whoever made this used."

"Hey, you guys, lunch is almost ready," Sam said, coming back into the kitchen with three-year old Tyler on her hip.

"Mommy, look!" Ashton said. "You're on the computer!"

"Huh?" Sam frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"My dad's on here too," Quincy said.

"And my mom," Clarissa added.

Sam leaned over to get a better look at the screen.

"Whoa, no way," she laughed. "You guys found this?"

"What's iCarly?" Jason asked.

"It was a web show," Sam explained. "That me, your dad, Aunt Carly and Uncle Gibby used to do when we were younger."

"Cool!" Emma said.

"Hey, you guys!" Sam called out onto the patio. "Come in here!"

"What's up?" Carly asked, entering the kitchen, Freddie and Gibby at her heels.

"Look what the kids found," Sam said.

"iCarly?" Freddie said, looking at the laptop. "Wow, I haven't been on this site in years."

"Oh yeah, that show was a lot of fun," Gibby nodded.

"I can't believe you guys found this," Carly smiled.

"You're on the computer!" Tyler said, pulling on Sam's hair.

"That's right," Sam nodded, wincing as she wrestled her hair out of the toddler's hand.

"You guys want to see some of the videos we used to make?" Freddie asked, taking Tyler from his wife.

"Yeah!" the kids all nodded.

"Oh, I remember this one," Carly said, scrolling through the video list. She pressed the play button and enlarged the screen.

A teenage Carly, dressed up like a farm girl, entered the screen, looking completely scatterbrained.

"_Wow," she said dumbly, looking around the scene. "I think I'm lost. I wonder if I should ask for directions that here sody stand!" _

"Mommy, you sound funny," Clarissa giggled.

"_Hiiiii," Carly said back on the computer screen. "Are you a wizard?" _

"_What the-Are you insane there, missy?" Sam, who was dressed up as a cowboy. "Do I look like any sort of dang blasted wizard you've ever seen?" _

"_If I was a wizard, I would make a wish for some bubblegum," Carly smiled stupidly. _

"_You dummy, wizards don't grant wishes!" Sam the cowboy exclaimed. "You done be thinking about a genie!" _

"_I have a cousin Jean," Carly said. "She's stupid." _

"_Excuse me," a teenage Gibby said suddenly, stepping into the scene wearing a long robe and a fake silver beard. "I am a wizard looking to buy a beverage before heading back home to work on my potions and spells and other magical activities." _

"Nice costume, dad," Quincy grinned.

"I know, I look pretty good in it," Gibby said.

"_Whoa," Carly the farm girl gasped. "Are you a wizard?" _

"_Yes, I think I did just say that, yes," Gibby nodded. _

"_Can you give me some bubblegum?" Carly asked. _

"_Well…I suppose I can provide for your gum chewing needs," Gibby the wizard shrugged. He pulled out a magic wand and waved it in the air. _

_A flash appeared across the screen and a second later, Carly's hair was covered in a pink goop. _

The kids all began laughing.

"_Oh no!" Carly the farm girl shrieked. "What's in my hair?" _

"_Your bubblegum," Gibby replied. _

"_You moron!" Sam snapped, smacking Gibby in the head. "She didn't ask for you to put that sugary snack in her there hair! What kind of messed up wizard are you, boy?" _

"_Oh, sorry, did you want some bubblegum too?" Gibby asked, pulling out his wand again. _

"_No!" Sam yelled. "I don't want any-"_

_But Gibby had already waved his wand and another flash appeared on the screen, and a second later, Sam's hair was covered with bubblegum, just like Carly's. _

"_Well, okay," Carly said, turning to the camera. "That was another segment of The Idiot Farm Girl." _

"_Technical effects brought to you by our awkward and nerdy tech producer Fredwart Benson," Sam said, pressing a button on her blue remote, causing a chorus of 'boos' to sound. _

"_Very funny, Sam…jerk," Freddie's voice said lamely. _

"_Wow, what an insult," Sam smirked, her voice dripping in sarcasm. _

"_Well excuse me for not being as profound in those as you!" _

"_I don't know what profound means!" _

"_Yeah, surprise, surprise." _

"_Are you calling me dumb, nub?" _

"_Maybe I am, Puckett!" _

"_That's it!" Sam snapped, throwing down her remote and starting towards Freddie. _

"_Sam, no! Not my-ow!" _

"That was funny!" Quincy said.

"Yeah!" Clarissa agreed.

"Did you beat up daddy, mommy?" Emma asked.

"Um, well…not-not really-" Sam started.

"How come you called mommy dumb?" Ashton asked Freddie.

"Well, see, I-I didn't exactly mean-" Freddie began.

"Look, this was made before your mommy and daddy started dating," Carly explained quickly. "But they still didn't mean what they said on that video. They just got into a few arguments back then. Of course, they still argue about the stupidest things…but we all know that they love each other very, very much."

"Yes, we do," Freddie nodded, leaning down to kiss his wife.

"Yuck!" Tyler cringed, covering his eyes.

"Can we see more videos?" Jason asked.

"Sure," Sam nodded. "Hey, we should show them some of our random debates!"

"Oh, don't forget The Jitters!" Gibby added.

"And that skit that we sent in for the web awards in Japan!" Carly said.

"I think we're gonna be here awhile," Freddie laughed.


	400. Chapter 400

**AN-400 chapters, whoo! I can't believe it. Thanks for everyone who has kept up with this story after so many chapters, you all are the best!**

**Also, this chapter takes place after iSaved Your Life, only in this version, Sam never told Freddie he was Carly's bacon, so they never broke up in the episode.**

…

_Refrain_

"Ow, ow, _ow_!" Gibby exclaimed indignantly as Sam and Carly pulled wax strips off his back. "That hurts!"

"Um, well, okay!" Carly said, looking at the camera Freddie had pointed at her and Sam. "Clearly waxing Gibby's back with industrial strength wax was _not _a good idea!"

"Too bad, his back really needed waxed," Sam cringed.

"Anyway, that's all we have for you tonight," Carly smiled. "So until next week-"

"Try not frame any chipmunks," Sam finished.

"And we're clear," Freddie said, turning off his camera. "Great job, you guys."

"Hey, great job on the camera too," Carly grinned, hurrying over to her boyfriend and kissing the tip of his nose.

Sam rolled her eyes but bit her tongue.

"Thanks," Freddie smiled.

"Oh, and guess what?" Carly said excitedly. "I got us reservations at Petrozini's for tomorrow night for our two week anniversary!"

"Oh," Freddie said. "W-Wow, that sounds…great. But I thought we were going out for dinner tonight."

"So? We can go two nights in a row, can't we?" Carly shrugged. "Hey, and tonight after dinner, I was thinking we could go to the pier and sit and watch the stars for a little bit. Doesn't that sound romantic?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "Real romantic."

"Hey!" Gibby frowned, pulling the last of the wax strips off his back. "I thought you and I were supposed to go bowling tonight, Freddie."

"Oh, right, I-I completely forgot," Freddie said.

"Well, can't you guys go this weekend?" Carly asked.

"Yeah, this weekend we can go, Gib," Freddie said.

"No, because this weekend won't be the big bowling tournament with a cash prize and a pass for unlimited nachos from the snack bar!" Gibby said.

"Whoa, free nachos?" Sam said. "I'm in."

"Great, you can go with Sam, and me and Freddie can go on our date," Carly said happily. "Everyone wins!" She turned back to Freddie. "And I even bought you the cutest tie to wear to dinner tonight. Come on, it's in my room. I'll show you."

She took Freddie's hand and led him out of the studio.

"Wow," Gibby said the second the couple left. "They are _obnoxious_."

"Gibby," Sam said, putting her hand on the boy's shoulder. "I think that's the smartest thing I've ever heard come out of your mouth."

…..

"See, isn't this better than some lame bowling tournament?" Carly asked Freddie that evening as the couple sat at their booth at a small bistro.

"Oh…yeah," Freddie said, plastering a smile on his face as he tried not to think about defending his record at the bowling alley for most strikes in a single game. "So much better."

"I can't believe we've actually been a couple for two whole weeks," Carly sighed, staring across the table at Freddie. "Hasn't it been amazing?"

"Real amazing," Freddie grinned. "I just wish I had a time machine so I could see the look on younger me's face when I told him I was actually dating Carly Shay."

Carly laughed as she took a bite of her salad. "Hey, anyway," she said. "I was thinking tomorrow before Petrozini's we spend the whole day together. You know, for our anniversary. We could go get coffee and cinnamon buns, take a walk through the park, go shopping at the mall, grab some sandwiches for lunch, maybe stop off at a movie and _not _watch the movie."

Freddie chuckled. "Wow, that does sound…fun."

"Great, so it's a date!" Carly said happily. She got to her feet. "I'm just going to run to the bathroom. I'll be right back!" She leaned down and kissed him before hurrying off towards the restroom.

Freddie leaned back in his seat, deep in thought. He was a little confused. Him and Carly had been a couple for two weeks; ever since he had pushed her out of the path of an out-of-control taco truck. Initially, he had been thrilled. Heck, he had been dreaming of being Carly's boyfriend since he met her back in the fifth grade! But somehow, the experience wasn't quite what he imagined it.

He wasn't exactly miserable, yet he didn't feel those proverbial sparks and fireworks that everyone said you felt when you were with the person you cared most about. In fact, there were sometimes when being with Carly as a couple felt downright…awkward.

And then there was the fact that she seemed to suddenly want to spend every waking second with him. He liked Carly, but sometimes he _did _need his own space.

And of course, Freddie couldn't help but wonder from time to time _why _Carly was suddenly head over heels for him. Hadn't she spent years constantly telling him that they were only ever going to be friends? Had she really had such a sudden change of heart?

_I wonder if it had anything to do with me saving her from that taco truck,_ Freddie thought slowly to himself. _Is that what got her to finally be in to me? Nah, that's ridiculous. And you know what, Fredward Benson? You need to snap out of this! You are actually dating __**Carly Shay**__, and all you're worrying about is missing a bowling tournament with Gibby? Pull it together!_

"I'm back!" Carly announced, returning to the booth. "Did you miss me?"

"Er…duh," Freddie said, smiling weakly.

"Hey while I was in the bathroom, I heard this girl talking on the phone to her boyfriend about couple's paddleboat lessons. We should totally check that out this weekend! After we go strawberry picking, of course, and we-"

_She's the girl of your dreams_, Freddie told himself firmly. _You should be __**enjoying **__all of these activities. Every single one of the hundreds of things that she insists on doing together…_

Still, though, Freddie couldn't help but wonder if this reality was actually what he had always been dreaming of.

…

"Victory nachos always taste the best," Gibby said as he dug into his winnings that evening at the bowling alley.

"All nachos are the best nachos," Sam said firmly. "And you have no right to call them victory nachos, Mr. Three-Straight-Gutter-Balls! You're lucky _I _managed to get those strikes and get us the win."

"Yeah, since when do you bowl?" Gibby asked.

"Mama can do anything if free food is the prize," Sam told him. She looked down at Gibby's feet. "And will you take those gross bowling shoes off already? We're nowhere near the lanes anymore."

"No way!" Gibby objected. "I paid six bucks to rent these things and I'm going to wear them until the last second."

"Couldn't you have at least worn socks with them?" Sam cringed. "I can smell your feet stinking in them from here!"

"And ruin the experience of bowling shoes?" Gibby scoffed.

"How is that ruining-Never mind," Sam sighed. "Man…this is probably one of my lowest Friday nights ever. I'm at a bowling alley with _you _because my best friend is off being all gushy with her new boyfriend."

"Hey, you think _I _like those two dating?" Gibby said. "Carly's stolen Freddie away from me! You know what's chilling in my fridge right now? Two root beers. After we finished bowling tonight Freddie and I were going to go back to my place and watch_ Galaxy Wars _with my cat!"

"Yeah well, you know what Carly and I usually do on Friday nights?" Sam said. "Stuff our faces with junk food and watch stupid movies!"

"But you're stuffing your face with junk food right now," Gibby pointed out.

"Gibby!" Sam snapped. She grabbed his soda and took a swig of it. "I mean those two are the _worst _couple I've ever seen! Carly's totally clingy and Freddie's just being a pushover and doing whatever she wants to do! Besides, don't you think it's sort of…weird, that Freddie's been chasing Carly for years now and Carly's _always _turned him down until now? Right after he saved her life."

"Yeah? And?" Gibby frowned, confused.

"Come on," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "You know how they say girls always go for the 'hero'."

"I'm still not following," Gibby said.

"Ugh, never mind!" Sam groaned. "Just go get me another soda."

"Kay-kay," Gibby nodded, getting to his feet.

Sam crossed her arms across her body, stuffing another chip into her mouth. She still couldn't believe that Carly and Freddie were actually a couple now. When Carly had told her two weeks ago, Sam literally had to use all her strength to try and act happy for her. In reality, though, she felt as though Carly had kicked her in the stomach.

Hard.

She hated the two of them together, but she knew if she didn't act supportive of the relationship, it would just create more problems. So whenever they two would kiss in front of her, Sam would just look away, trying to refrain from gagging. When Carly would practically sit on Freddie's lap while they were planning iCarly stuff, Sam would stuff her clenched fists in her pockets. And when they would walk through the halls of the school, hand-in-hand, Sam would let her frustration vent by slamming the nearest kid into a locker before storming off in another direction.

She didn't know what she hated about their relationship the most. The fact that she always felt like a third-wheel now, having Carly give her death glares when she would poke fun at Freddie, the pang of jealousy she got whenever she was near them…

_Jealousy_? Sam thought to herself, nearly choking on her nachos. _I am not jealous of them! Who cares if they __**insist **__on being a couple. I'm just wazzed off because they're probably the most nauseating, obnoxious, overly-romantic couple I've ever seen in my life! __**And **__it's obvious that Carly's just still stuck in her love-struck hero faze. The second she's over it, she'll toss Freddie to the curve, and he'll be single again…Not that that matters. _

"Here's your soda," Gibby said, handing her a cup. "Hey, since Freddie ditched me, you want to watch _Galaxy Wars _with me and my cat?"

"Dude," Sam said, shaking her head. "I will _never _be that desperate."

"So what? I'm just supposed to watch the movie alone with my cat?" Gibby frowned. "Come on! I need a third person there because things between him and I have been tense lately…Ever since I used his scratching post to-"

"Goodbye, Gibby," Sam said, getting to her feet and walking away.

…..

A few days later, Sam was heading over to the Shay's apartment. She opened the front door without knocking and saw Freddie sitting on the couch.

"'Sup, Benson?" Sam asked, tossing her jacket onto the floor by the coat rack.

"Oh, hey Puckett," Freddie said.

"Where's your little girlfriend?" Sam asked. "Did she finally get tired of looking at your face?"

"No," Freddie snapped. "Carly happens to _love _looking at my face. And for your information she's upstairs getting ready to go ice skating."

"You guys are going ice skating?" Sam frowned. _Thanks for the invite_.

"Yeah," Freddie sighed.

"Wait…I thought you didn't even know how to ice skate," Sam pointed out. "Doesn't your mom have some weird thing against you standing on frozen bodies of liquids?"

"She does, and I don't know how," Freddie mumbled. "But Carly really wants to go…"

"Dude," Sam said, sitting down on the couch next to him. "You do realize that you're in this relationship too. You don't _have _to do every little thing Carly wants to do. Stand up for yourself!"

"No, I don't want to argue with her," Freddie said. "You know Carly hates it when she gets into arguments."

"Yeah, she can't exactly stand her ground," Sam agreed. "She just breaks into tears instead of arguing back."

"Exactly," Freddie said. "Which I'd sort of like to avoid…Even if it _does _result in me breaking my leg. Again."

"Oh, your mom will have a melt down if that happens again," Sam chuckled.

"Probably," Freddie agreed.

Sam looked down at her lap. "Well…I'm gonna go up and see Carly real quick before you two leave."

"Okay," Freddie nodded.

Sam headed up the stairs to Carly's bedroom.

"Hey, Shay," she said, letting herself in.  
"Oh, hey Sam," Carly smiled. "Perfect timing. Which coat do you think I should wear ice-skating? The light pink or the dark pink?"

"Um…the dark," Sam said without even really looking. "I never knew you liked ice skating."

"It's a good date activity," Carly shrugged.

"Yeah, but didn't you guys just go roller skating yesterday?" Sam pointed out.

"Well…yeah," Carly said lamely. She sighed and threw the coats onto her bed. "Listen, Sam? Can I talk to you about something?"

"Sure kid, what's up?" Sam asked.

"You have to promise me that you won't let this leave this room, okay?"

"Promise," Sam said quickly. "Now what's bugging you?"

"It's just, dating Freddie…" Carly began. "It's not really like any other relationship I've been in."

Sam frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I mean when I usually go out with a guy," Carly said. "There's at least a tiny spark there, even if it's only for the first date. I'll usually get that sense of excitement and, I dunno, I've always liked that. But with Freddie, there's just no excitement or spark there. That's why I keep trying to pull off all these crazy dates with him. But nothing's working!"

"So…are you saying you _don't _like Freddie?" Sam asked slowly, trying not to get her hopes up.

"I-I don't know," Carly said heavily. "I don't think I do, but Freddie's one of my best friends; I can't break up with him, I'll break his heart! But I also don't want to lead him on if there's nothing there, either. Do you think I should talk to him?"

"Yes," Sam said quickly. So quickly that Carly gave her an odd look.

"I just mean…it will be better for everyone if you just get it over with, won't it?" Sam said.

Carly nodded. "You're right. If I don't feel anything during our date today, I'm going to have to break up with him. I just hope he doesn't take it too hard…"

….

Later that evening, Sam sat alone at the Groovy Smoothie, sipping her smoothie as she absentmindedly played on her phone.

She almost didn't notice when the door of the store opened and Freddie walked in.

"Oh…didn't think you'd be here," Freddie said when he spotted her.

"Am I not allowed to get a smoothie at nine o'clock at night?" Sam asked, rolling her eyes.

"Care if I join you?" Freddie asked.

Sam shrugged and Freddie sat down.

"So where's Carly?" Sam asked.

"I think she went back to her place," Freddie replied.

"You think?"

"Come on, I'm sure she told you," Freddie said.

"Told me what?" Sam asked curiously.

Freddie took a deep breath. "Her and I sort of…broke up."

Sam blinked. _Whoa, she did it_, she thought to herself, trying to contain her excitement about the news.

"Oh," Sam said. "Well um…that's…something."

"Yeah, something," Freddie echoed.

Sam sighed. She may have bullied Freddie frequently from the day that they met, but she wasn't heartless. She wasn't going to kick him while he was down.

"Hey," Sam said. "I'm sure it wasn't _totally _you. And, um, I bet Carly didn't exactly feel _good _breaking up with you. So, you know, don't-don't feel too down. What's that thing they say about fish in the sea? You'll find another chick who isn't repulsed by you eventually."

_Or if you look right in front of you_, Sam thought to herself. She frowned. Where did _that _come from. She shook her head. T-Bo must've put some bad fruit into her smoothie.

Freddie gave her a strange look. "Carly didn't break up with me."

"But you just said-"

"We sort of broke up with each other," Freddie explained. "It was mutual."

"Mutual?"

"Yeah," Freddie said. "After we skated around the ice skating rink a few times, we sat down and well, I think we both had the same idea."

"Wait," Sam said slowly. "Are you telling me that _you _wanted to break up with Carly? The girl you've been chasing like a puppy since…forever?"

"Let's just say dating her wasn't all that I thought it would be," Freddie said, giving her a small smile. "Don't get me wrong. Carly's a great girl, but going out with her was sort of like…going out with my sister. We just didn't hit it off that way. It felt so forced."

"So are you two cool?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, we're still cool," Freddie nodded. "We're better off as friends anyway."

"And, um, you aren't…upset?" Sam asked. "You're not gonna be all bummed out an annoying for the next week are you, nub?"

Freddie laughed. "No. I'm actually surprised. I thought breaking up with Carly would make me feel at least a little sad. But I feel fine. Great, even."

"Good," Sam said.

"Good?" Freddie repeated, raising an eyebrow. "Did I just hear that right? Was Sam Puckett actually _concerned _about my feelings?"

"No!" Sam snapped. "I just wanted to make sure you weren't super depressed so I can tease you about that huge wet stain you have on your jeans from falling down on the ice a million times guilt free."


	401. Chapter 401

_Rainbow_

"Where the heck are Sam and Freddie?" Carly asked as she paced back and forth in Spencer's apartment.

"I don't know," Spencer shrugged, looking up from the game of headbands he was playing with Gibby. "You live with Sam. Why didn't she just come over here with you?"

"She slept over at Freddie's. Again," Carly sighed.

"Well can we just eat already?" Gibby asked. "I'm starving! The pizza's been here for an hour already."

"No, we can't eat until Sam and Freddie are here too," Carly said firmly. "The plan was for all of us to sit down and drink hot cocoa and eat pizza while we watch the finale of _America Sings_ which, by the way, starts in about ten minutes! I swear, if they make me miss seeing that girl with the rainbow hair lose to Tate Awning…"

"Just _call _them and ask where they are," Spencer said, rolling her eyes. "Jeez, you're acting like a crazy person. Alright, Gibby, am I a fairy godmother?"

"No," Gibby said. "Am I a churro?"

"Dude!" Spencer exclaimed. "I said you float in water! Churros don't float!"

"Oh, they don't?" Gibby snapped. "Then explain to me why last night while I was in the bathtub-"

"Gibby!" Carly snapped. She looked at her phone again. "Ugh! They were supposed to be here an hour ago. You know, I expect _Sam _to be late, but you would think Freddie would manage to get them to places on time!"

"Pfft, come on," Spencer chuckled. "Freddie's punctuality has gone down hill ever since he started dating Sam."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Carly sighed. "You remember that little mantra he used to have in high school? Before him and Sam got together? Early is on time, on time is late, and late is unacceptable."

"Yeah, and now he doesn't even get to movies with enough time to watch the previews," Spencer agreed.

"You know what's sort of funny though," Spencer pointed out. "Freddie's punctuality may have gone down hill a little, but Sam's gotten a little better with it."

"Hey, that's true," Carly agreed. "You know I only had to wait an extra five minutes for her to pick me up from the car place the other day? I told her I needed her there to drive me home at twelve, and I didn't expect her until at _least _twelve thirty. But there she was."

"Man, that's sort of weird, don't you think?" Spencer said. "The way they rubbed off on each other."

"Hmm, I guess you have a point," Carly agreed. "They've been together for five years and Freddie has become a little more…_Sammish_. And Sam's become a tiny bit more Freddieish."

"I don't think those are real words," Gibby frowned.

"Oh, that reminds me!" Spencer said. "The other day when Freddie and I were at the mall, there was a guy dressed up as a wiener handing out free wiener nugget samples And guess who went back for thirds?"

Carly gasped. "But that totally goes against Freddie's strict one-per-customer policy on free samples!"

"I know!"

"Wow," Gibby said, crossing his arms. "Way to invite _me _to the mall."

"Yeah, well, wait to you hear what Sam did the other night at our apartment," Carly told her brother. "We were doing our nails and some of the red nail polish spilled on the kitchen table, and she _cleaned it up_!"

"Without being asked or bribed?" Spencer asked, his eyes widening.

"Uh-huh!"  
"Wow…" Spencer said, shaking his head. "They've really corrupted each other, haven't they?"

"Totally," Carly chuckled. "I wonder if that's what happens to all couples when they're together for so long."

"Too bad none of _us _have been in a relationship that long to compare," Spencer said.

"Yes…thanks for that," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Well, I guess they still are a pretty cute couple. Actually, I think they're one of the best couple's I've ever seen."

"They _are _great together," Spencer agreed.

"Sam _does _hurt me less when Freddie's around," Gibby nodded.

Just then, the front door of the apartment opened and Sam and Freddie entered, hand-in-hand.

"Finally!" Carly exclaimed, jumping to her feet. "Where were you guys? You were supposed to be an hour ago for _America Sings_!"

"Relax, Carls, the show doesn't start for another three minutes," Freddie shrugged.

"Yeah," Sam nodded, hanging up her coat on the coat rack instead of simply tossing it on the floor like she used to. "Besides, Fredgut and I were sort of…busy."

"Making out and losing track of time doesn't count as a liable excuse," Carly said, planting her hands on her hips.

"We weren't making out!" Freddie defended.

"All of the time…" Sam finished lamely. "But, um, we-we do have to tell you all something."

"What's up?" Spencer asked.

"Is this about my new cologne?" Gibby sighed. "Man, I _knew _I should've stuck to the bottle with the mountains on it!"

"No one cares about your cologne," Freddie said, shaking his head.

"Well!" Gibby said indignantly.  
"Alright, what are you going to tell us?" Carly asked. "And could you please tell us within the next two minutes before the show starts?"

Sam and Freddie exchanged quick glances before Sam slowly held her hand out, revealing a beautiful, simple diamond ring.

Carly's jaw dropped and Spencer's pants fell to the floor. "No way!" the siblings both exclaimed.

"Hey, nice ring," Gibby said. "Now what were you going to tell us?"

"You idiot!" Sam said, thumping the back of his head. "That ring means we're getting married! _That's _what we were going to tell you!"

"Oh my God, oh my God," Carly squealed, throwing her arms around Sam. "Okay, forget _America Sings_, you have to tell me everything. How did he do it? Was it romantic? Did you cry?"

"No!" Sam answered.

"Pfft, yes," Freddie chuckled. "I had to wait for her to stop before she actually said yes."

"Can it, nub!"

"Hey, congratulations, you guys," Spencer said. "You know…I've seen a lot of marriages in my day-"

"Just not your own, right?" Gibby said.

"Gibby!" Spencer snapped. "Anyway…I just wanted to say that you guys have one of the strongest relationships I've seen. You really are a great couple. I know you two really will last forever."  
"Spence…you don't have to give a cheesy speech until the actual wedding," Sam said, hugging the man.

"I'm just too emotional right now!" Spencer said, pulling Freddie into the hug as well. "I had to get it out!"


	402. Chapter 402

**Hey, this oneshot is a sequel to chapter 385, where Sam found out she was pregnant while and Freddie were in college.**

…

_Input_

Sam wiped her mouth as she slowly got up from the bathroom floor. This had been the fourth morning in a row that she had thrown up her entire stomach before she even had breakfast.

Morning sickness really wasn't one of the funner sides of pregnancy.

Sam quickly washed her face and headed out to the kitchen, where Carly was happily pouring herself a bowl of cereal.

"Morning!" she said brightly as Sam sat down at the table. "I made some coffee. You want some?"  
"Sure," Sam nodded. "Wait, no! No, I don't want any."

"You sure?" Carly asked. "You were up pretty late last night finishing your paper, which, by the way, I _told _you should've been done this weekend. Aren't you tired?"

"I just…don't want caffeine right now," Sam mumbled.

"Okay," Carly shrugged. "Well, I'm going to head to campus soon. I want to study for my exam at the library. You want to come?"

"No," Sam replied. "Freddie's going to be here soon."

"What?" Carly exclaimed. "Freddie's coming over and you didn't even tell me?"

"Sorry, must've slipped my mind," Sam said.

Carly stared at her best friend. "Hey…are you doing okay?"

"What do you mean?" Sam frowned.

"I mean…you've been acting different," Carly said. "I just want to make sure you're okay."

_Well I'm broke, pregnant, and don't know the first thing about taking care of kids_, Sam thought to herself. _I don't think that qualifies as okay. _

But Sam plastered a smile onto her face. "Yeah, I'm fine Carls. Just stressed from that stupid paper I had to write last night."

"Oh," Carly nodded. "Well, at least you got it out of the way. It was for that government class you're in, right? You know Sam, you're doing really well in there. I'm proud of you. I hear it's not an easy class but you're totally on track for an A!"

_Too bad I'll probably have to drop out of it before I get the A_, Sam thought miserably.

"Well, I want to get a seat at the library before all the spots are taken," Carly said, looking at her watch. "It's bound to be packed; midterms _are _right around the corner. I'll see you later. Oh, and tell Freddie I said hey! I can't wait to see him again; I can't believe it's been a whole month since he's visited."

Once Carly was out the door, Sam jumped to her feet and headed to the fridge and pulled out a jar of pickles. It was the only thing she was hungry for.

As she ate, she began to pace back and forth, deep in thought.

What was she even going to do once Freddie got here? Sure, she desperately wanted her boyfriend near her, but seeing him wasn't going to completely solve this problem. She would still be pregnant when he arrived, after all.

She was jostled from her thoughts by a loud knock at the door. She rushed to open it and before Freddie hardly had a chance to look at her properly, she threw herself into his arms.

"Sam," was all he said before she lost it and began crying into his shoulder.

Freddie wrapped his arms around her, not saying a word.

The couple stood there for a moment before they finally pulled apart.

"Sorry," Sam mumbled, wiping her eyes. "Stupid hormones."

"You don't have to apologize, baby," Freddie said gently. "How are you feeling?"

Sam shrugged. "Scared?"

"Yeah, well," Freddie sighed. "So am I. But I meant are you feeling sick? Have you been eating well? Have you seen a doctor yet?"

"My morning sickness kicked in, unfortunately," Sam told him heavily. "I've been eating sort of well, I guess…I had a salad yesterday. And-And I went to the doctor's yesterday."  
She reached into her pocket and pulled out a folded sonogram and handed it to Freddie. "There it is. That's our baby."

Freddie stared down at the sonogram photo. "Wow," he breathed.

"It's not very big yet," Sam continued, sitting down on the couch. "The doctor told me it's about the size of a peanut right now. He couldn't even tell me if it was a boy or a girl."

"Yeah, you can't tell the gender until around the end of the first trimester," Freddie said. "I-I read up on some stuff during the plane ride."

"Ah," Sam nodded. "Maybe I should do that too…"

She took a deep breath. "We need to figure this out, Freddie. Soon."

"I know," Freddie said. "And look, I was thinking…I know you already told me you don't want me to, but I really do think the best thing for us if for me to move back here and-"

"No," Sam said firmly.

"But Sam-"

"You're not going to give up graduating from one of the best schools in the country!" Sam exclaimed. "Do you know how sorry you'll be if you do that?"

"And how many times do I have to tell you I'm not going to leave you to have this child by yourself!" Freddie said loudly. "You can't raise a baby by yourself, Sam!"

"Who says we're even going to keep it, huh?" Sam snapped.

Freddie stared at her. "What?"

"Maybe…maybe we could put the kid up for adoption," Sam said softly.

"Adoption?" Freddie repeated.

"Don't pretend the thought hasn't crossed your mind," Sam whispered. "Think about it. We're both broke. We don't have jobs and we don't know the first thing about taking care of a baby! How are we supposed to handle this?"

"Okay," Freddie said heavily. "If-If that's really want to do…I guess I can't stop you. But…_is _that what you want to do?"

Sam sighed. "I-I don't know. I thought it was. But then when I went to the doctor and I saw the baby inside of me…I don't know anymore."

"That's okay," Freddie said gently. "Look…we have time. We'll look into adoption."

"Freddie?" Sam asked. "If-If we decide to keep the baby…how will we afford it? I'm serious. That doctor's trip the other day alone wiped me out."

"We-We'll figure it out," Freddie said.

"Come on," Sam said. "You didn't fly all the way over here just to tell me we'll figure everything out. We need to _actually _figure stuff out now."

"I know," Freddie mumbled. "But there's just so much to figure out. I-I don't even know where to start."

"Let's just pick one thing and we'll start from there," Sam said.

"Okay," Freddie agreed. "How about we figure out…what we're going to do for money? That's probably the biggest thing right now. Because even if we do give this baby up for adoption…hospital bills aren't cheap."

"I applied for a job at the bookstore the other day," Sam said softly. "And-And I think a few places are hiring in the food court."

"And…a lot of students at MIT have jobs as tech assistants," Freddie said. "I'm going to try and see if I can get a position. You do all the work over the phone; you just have to help customers who call with problems with their laptops and stuff. It doesn't pay a lot, but…it's better than nothing."

"Yeah…better than nothing," Sam echoed. She rested her head on Freddie's shoulder. "Have you told anybody yet?"

"No," Freddie replied. "I-I didn't think you'd want me to. Besides, the only person I'd have to tell is my mom, and I really didn't want to deal with her criticizing input. Have you told anyone?"

Sam shook her head. "Not even Carly. But I think I may need to soon…She said something this morning about me acting different. I just wonder how she'll react."

"Carly's our best friend," Freddie told her, gently playing with the ends of her blonde hair. "She's practically your sister. I'm sure she'll be supportive."

"I hope so," Sam said. She sat up and leaned over to give her boyfriend a soft kiss. "Listen…I don't want to tell her tonight. Do you think that maybe we could, you know, just spend tonight in my room so we don't have to see her? She knows you're coming, but she'll also know not to barge into my room if the door's closed."

"Whatever you want," Freddie nodded.

Sam put her head back on his shoulder. "I'm really scared," she said for the second time that morning.

Freddie wrapped his arms around her. "So am I."

….

As per Sam's request, the couple spent the entire evening in Sam's bedroom. They talked well into the night; about the baby, about their lives and what they were going to do. Freddie was still insistent on moving back to Washington to be with Sam throughout the pregnancy, but Sam was still firmly against it. Sam proposed that _she _could drop out of school if she needed to, but Freddie told her that was completely unfair; that she had worked so hard to get where she was and it would devastate him if he had to see her give it up.

By the time they finally fell asleep, they still hadn't solved any of their problems, yet Sam awoke feeling better than she had all week.

She looked over at Freddie and saw him begin to stir next to her.

"Morning," she whispered when he opened his eyes.

"Morning," Freddie smiled. He leaned over and kissed her.

"Well," Sam sighed. "Last night wasn't exactly productive, was it? We didn't get anywhere. We're just as lost as we were when you got here."

Freddie didn't reply.

"This is the most confusing thing ever," Sam moaned. "I swear, it's like-"

She stopped talking suddenly and jumped up from the bed and rushed into the adjoining bathroom.

"Sam?" Freddie frowned, his voice full of concern. He hurried after her and saw Sam hunched over the toilet, vomiting.

"You okay?" he asked, pulling back her hair.

"I'm fine," Sam mumbled, taking a deep breath. "It's just morning sickness."

She got to her feet and sat down on the edge of the bathtub.

"Freddie?" she whispered.

"Yeah?"

"I-I know this is crazy," Sam said. "But…I don't know if I'd want to put this baby up for adoption."

"But…But yesterday you said-"

"I know what I said yesterday," Sam said. "And I still think it would make the most sense to give this baby up. But…It's growing in me. It's _our _baby. It will always be our baby. And I know we're young and we have no money and we're both in school and it's totally stupid to even be bringing this up-"

"It's not stupid," Freddie said at once. "I-I don't know how I'd feel about having a stranger raise my child either. But…we do have to think about what would be best for this baby. If-If we can't provide for it-"

"I know," Sam nodded.

Freddie put a hand on her knee. "Baby, I know you said you wanted to get everything figured out now, but-but this is one thing we can't rush a decision on. We can figure out how we're going to get money to cover the hospital bills and what we're going to do about school right now, but this decision we can't make on a whim. We need more time. Let's both really consider it, okay? Let's see how we do making the money and we'll see how supportive our parents are and if they'll help us out. That way we'll have a much better idea of how our situation will be. If we realize that there's no way we can take care of this baby…we'll-we'll arrange for a family that we like to adopt it. And if we think we're in a position to be able to totally provide for it…well, we'll do it."

Sam showed a small smile. "I think I like that idea."

"I'm glad," Freddie said, kissing the top of her head.

"You know," Sam said. "I think I smell waffles cooking in the kitchen…which means Carly's up."

"Oh," Freddie said. "Does that mean…are we going to tell her?"

Sam squeezed his hand. "No use putting it off anymore."

And so slowly, the couple headed out to the kitchen, hand in hand.

"Wow, look who finally decided to come and say hi!" Carly grinned the second she saw Freddie. She ran over to him. "Dude, I haven't seen you in like, a month!"

"I've missed you too, Carls," Freddie said, giving her a quick hug.

"I hope you two enjoyed totally ignoring me last night," Carly said playfully.

"Sorry," Sam said. "We-We were both pretty tired. So we went to bed early."

"Uh-huh, and I'm sure you both just _slept_ in your room all night," Carly grinned knowingly. "But whatever, let's all hang out today! It can be just like old times."

_It's never going to be just like old times_, Sam thought to herself. She looked up at Freddie, who nodded.

"Um, actually, Carly," Freddie said, taking a deep breath. "Sam and I really can't just hang out today. We have a lot to discuss."

"Discuss?" Carly frowned. "Is everything okay?"

Sam slowly shook her head. "Um, actually Carls, no. No, it's not."

"What's wrong?" Carly asked softly. "Are you guys okay? Did-Did something happen?"

"We're okay," Freddie said. "Well…sort of."

"You guys are scaring me now," Carly said. "What's going on?"

Sam sighed. "I'm pregnant, Carly."

Carly blinked. "W-What?"

"Sam's pregnant," Freddie repeated. "That's…that's sort of why I came down here this weekend."

"Oh my God," Carly breathed. "I don't believe…come here."

She ran over to her friends and threw her arms around both of them.

For a moment, the three of them simply stayed like that. Finally, they pulled apart.

"Well, um, congratulations," Carly said lamely.

Sam chuckled. "Thanks, but um, we're not exactly celebrating right now. We didn't plan for this. At all."

"Oh," Carly said. "Well…do you need anything? I'm here for you guys, you know that, right? If you need anything, all you have to do is ask."

"We appreciate it, Carls," Freddie said. "We really do. But right now…we don't know what we need. We have no idea what we're going to do. Sam and I have a lot to figure out right now."

"Of course," Carly nodded. "Why-Why don't I leave you two alone then?"

"You don't have to do that, Carly," Sam said quickly.

"It's fine, you two need to talk, and I don't want to get in the way," Carly said. "We-We can order a pizza tonight, maybe. After you guys have some time to discuss things."

Sam smiled. "We'd like that."

"Right, well…I guess I'll go hang out around campus then," Carly said. She grabbed her bag and threw it over her shoulder. She looked back at her two friends. "Just remember, you guys. I'm here for you. No matter what."

"Thanks," Freddie said sincerely. "You have no idea how much we needed to hear that."


	403. Chapter 403

_Wound_

"-And next on iCarly," Sam grinned as her and Carly held up a large bag of flower petals.

"We're going to try and grow our own Gibby Blossom!" Carly said.

"I picked the name!" Gibby, who was sitting in a large tub of fertilizer, said proudly.

"Special shout-out to our nubby tech-producer, Fredwardo, for going to the gardening store with him mom as he does every weekend to pick up the supplies for this skit," Sam added.

"I do not go to the gardening store with my mom every weekend," Freddie said, turning the camera onto himself. "Carly and Sam made me get the supplies and my mom _happened _to have a coupon, so I went with her this _one time_!"

"And it was the highlight of his whole weekend," Sam smirked.

"Don't let their constant, pointless fighting confuse you," Carly sighed, pointing the camera at herself. "They really still are a happy couple. Believe me. I have to walk in on them making out at least once a day."

"Well learn to knock," Sam mumbled.

"It's my house!" Carly said, amused. "Anyway, onto our Gibby Blossom! First, we need to-"

Suddenly, Sam's phone began to ring loudly in her pocket.

"You were supposed to turn your phone off, baby," Freddie sighed.

"Yeah, like I'll ever do that," Sam said.

"Um…are you really answering your phone in the middle of our show?" Carly asked, still smiling at the camera.

"Just a sec," Sam said, putting her Pearphone up to her ear. "Hello? Yeah…wait. What?"

Sam quickly headed out of the studio, leaving a very confused Carly, Freddie and Gibby behind.

"Um, well it looks like I've been abandoned," Carly said brightly.

"Sam's meat shipment probably arrived," Freddie chuckled.

"But no worries," Carly said. "You'll still get to see what Gibby would look like as a flower!"

"Um, guys? Can we hurry this up?" Gibby asked. "I'm starting to get dirt in places dirt should never be."

…..

Sam didn't return to the show. When Carly finally ended it on her own, nearly half-an-hour had passed.

"Where the heck did she go?" Carly asked, slightly annoyed. "She knows she can't just run out in the middle of a show! Where'd she go?"

"How should I know?" Freddie asked.

"You're her boyfriend!" Carly snapped. "It's your job to know."

"Come on, you know Sam," Freddie smiled. "She probably wound up falling asleep downstairs on your couch."

"Then let's go down and wake her up so I can yell at her properly," Carly said, though Freddie could tell she wasn't really mad.

"You coming, Gib?" Freddie asked.

"Nah, I have to finish shaking the dirt out of my underwear," Gibby said, unbuckling his belt.

"Whoa! Wait till we leave!" Carly exclaimed.

"Prudes," Gibby mumbled.

Carly and Freddie stepped out of the studio. They were surprised, though, to see Spencer leaning against the wall in the hallway outside.

"Hey," Carly said to her brother. "What are you doing? You know you could've come in and watched us do the show if you wanted to."

"Is Sam downstairs?" Freddie asked. "She ran off in the middle of one of our skits."

"Um, guys?" Spencer said in a serious tone that he so rarely took. "Is Sam okay?"

"Huh?" Carly frowned. "What do you mean? Of course she's okay."

"Why?" Freddie asked, concerned.

"Because," Spencer replied. "She-She seemed upset about something a little while ago. I was downstairs working on a sculpture when she came down, talking on her phone, and she just rushed out. I-I think she was crying."

"What?" Freddie demanded. "What-What was she crying for?"

"I don't know, I thought you guys would know what was up," Spencer said.

"Well where'd she go?" Carly asked.

Spencer shook his head. "I-I don't know. I called after her but she just ignored me."

"Come on," Freddie said. "We've got to find her."

"Let's go," Carly nodded as the two teens hurried downstairs.

…..

Carly and Freddie searched all around for Sam. She wasn't at the Groovy Smoothie, Tub of Chicken or El Guapo Taco.

Finally, the two decided to try Sam's house. She didn't go there often, but as they had run out of restaurants to search for her…

"I'm worried," Freddie said as him and Carly walked up Sam's driveway. "Why won't she answer her phone? What could've happened?"

He wanted nothing more at the moment to hold his girlfriend and fix whatever it was that was hurting her at the moment. He still couldn't believe that Spencer had said she was crying…

"I don't know," Carly said, knocking on Sam's door. "But I really hope she's okay."

Freddie knocked on the door as well. Harder. "Sam!" he called. "Sam, it's us! If you're in there, please open up!"

"Oh…where else would she be?" Carly moaned. "Do you think maybe you could track her phone again?"

"I could," Freddie nodded. "But we'd have to go back to your place to do it. I have to do it from an actual computer. I just wish she'd answer her phone so we'd at least know if she was okay."

"Hey!" a voice said from behind them suddenly. "Who are you?"

Carly and Freddie spun around to see a dark haired girl coming up the driveway.

"Who are you?" the girl repeated. "You cops?"

"Um, no," Freddie said. "We're looking for the girl who lives here. Sam Puckett."

"Hey, wait a minute," Carly said, staring at the girl. "I've met you before! You're Sam's cousin, aren't you? Um…Chloe?"

The girl nodded. "Yeah…oh, right. You're Sam's friend, aren't you?"

"Yes," Carly said. "And this is her boyfriend, Freddie. Freddie, I met Chloe a few years ago when Sam invited me to her Uncle's parole party."

"Hi," Freddie said quickly. "Listen, do you know where Sam is? Apparently she's really upset about something and we just want to find her to make sure she's okay."

Chloe frowned. "You don't know?"

"Know what?" Carly asked.

"I guess that's not too surprising," Chloe continued. "It just happened…I only found out from my mom a few minutes ago and I just wanted to make sure Sam was doing okay…which she probably isn't."

"What happened?" Freddie asked urgently.

Chloe sighed. "Her mom just died."

Freddie and Carly's jaw dropped.

"W-What?" Carly whispered.

"Apparently she was in a pretty bad car crash," Chloe explained. "And, well…she didn't make it.

"Oh my God…" Freddie mumbled. He pounded on the front door harder. He needed to see Sam now.

"Don't break down the door," Chloe said, pushing Freddie out of the way. "I'll pick the lock for you. You guys can go in before me. Sam probably needs you guys more than me right now anyway."

Chloe kneeled down by the lock and in such a manner that only a Puckett could manage, she had the door unlocked in a matter of seconds.

Freddie didn't even pause to thank her. The second the door was open, Freddie bolted into the house, Carly at his feet. He headed straight to Sam's room. The door was closed, but he could hear muffled cries coming from within.

Slowly, he pushed open the door.

Sam was siting on her bed, her face completely tearstained. She was hugging an old pillow and didn't even look up when Freddie and Carly entered her room.

"Sam…" was all Freddie could muster before he rushed over to her bed and wrapped his arms around her.

Sam didn't question how he had gotten into the house or if he knew what had happened. She just continued to cry as he held her.

Carly stood by the door. She wanted to comfort her best friend as well, but right now she knew that Sam needed Freddie more than her. So Carly waited patiently as she watched Freddie work his magic.

…..

Carly and Freddie stayed the night at Sam's house. Sam barely spoke to them, though. She kept getting calls from family members, asking her where she was or if they needed them to come over. She said no. She wanted to be left alone right now.

Sam cried herself to sleep around ten o'clock. Freddie and Carly grabbed a few pillows and blanket from the couch downstairs and each set themselves up a bed in her room.

Freddie was awoken a few hours later, and when he opened his eyes, he saw Sam stepping over Carly and heading out of the room.

Without even thinking, Freddie got up and followed her.

She went down to the kitchen and sat down at the table, not even bothering to turn on the light.

"Sam?" Freddie said softly, getting her attention.

She turned around and looked at him.

"Did I wake you up?" Sam asked softly, her voice cracking.

"No," Freddie said, sitting down next to her. "How are you feeling?"

Sam shrugged.

"Do you want me to make you something to eat?"

"I'm not hungry," Sam mumbled. "Besides, there's nothing to eat here…she never goes to the store."

She looked down at her lap. "Or I guess…she never _went _to the store."

And with that she broke down again and Freddie pulled her closer to him.

"It's okay," Freddie said, rubbing her back.

"It's _not _okay!" Sam snapped. "My mom's dead, Freddie! What am I even supposed to do now?"

Freddie didn't answer.

"What do I do?" Sam asked again, her voice softer. "I'm all alone now."

"You're not alone, Sam," Freddie told her. "You have me. And Carly. And the rest of your family. They'll be here for you. We all will."

"It's not going to be the same."

"No," Freddie agreed heavily. "It's-It's not. Things will be different, baby. But like I said, you'll have us to get you through them."

"I just want her back," Sam whispered. "I know I always complained about her and we got into stupid fights at least once a week…but she-"

"She's your mom," Freddie finished for her. "And she'll always be your mom. Just remember that."

"I just hate this," Sam mumbled, pulling her legs up to her chest. "I hate feeling all sad…She used to always say Puckett's never _ever_ cry, and I'm here acting like some pathetic wimp bawling my eyes out."

"You're not a pathetic wimp," Freddie said firmly. "No one expects you to be a stone. Anyone in your position right now would feel the same way. This is a big loss for you; it's normal to cry. I'd be worried if you didn't cry."

Sam didn't reply, but Freddie could see a few tears falling onto her old hoodie she was wearing.

So for the second time that night, Freddie held her tight against him, wishing he could do more as he watched his girlfriend shake with cries.

…..

Pam's funeral was three days later. Freddie never realized just how large Sam's family was. Sure, he'd always hear stories about an uncle or a cousin, but the funeral home seemed to be jam packed with Pucketts.

Freddie didn't want to leave Sam's side at all, but he knew that she needed time to be with her family as well.

Melanie had flown in from her boarding school two days earlier and he saw that her and Sam were huddled together in a corner, talking amongst themselves.

"Hey," Carly said, coming over to Freddie. "There sure are a ton of Pucketts."

"Yeah," Freddie nodded.

"Where's Sam?"

"Over there, with Melanie," Freddie replied. "I didn't want to intrude on them."

"They need each other right now," Carly agreed. "Anyway…Spencer and I were talking last night and-and he agreed that if Sam's willing…she should come live with us. I mean, I-I don't know if she has anywhere else to go. I'm sure she could go stay with one of her relatives, but most of them had to work out special arrangements with their prisons to come here today. And then a lot of them live out of state, so Sam would have to move away, and I don't want that."

"Me neither," Freddie said at once.

"And Melanie has her boarding school to go back to," Carly continued. "And…Sam kind of lives at my place now anyway. Besides, we only have a few months of high school left."

"I think she'll really appreciate that, Carls," Freddie smiled. He looked back over towards the corner where Melanie and Sam were still standing.

"You want to go over, don't you?" Carly asked knowingly.

Freddie nodded. Sam just looked so…empty. All he wanted to do was rush over to her and comfort her.

"Come on," Carly said gently.

The two walked over to the twins.

"How are you guys doing?" Carly asked when they reached them.

Melanie managed a small smile. "We're okay."

Sam didn't reply.

"I think it's great that your whole family was able to come," Freddie said.

"Yeah, funerals are great gathering places," Sam said dryly.

"I didn't mean-"

"It's fine," she mumbled.

"Um, I-I'm gonna go see if our grandmother got everything sorted out with her lawyer before coming here," Melanie said. She turned to Sam. "I'll be back in a sec, okay?"

"Okay," Sam nodded.

Once Melanie left, Freddie put an arm around Sam. "You two seem like you're getting along pretty well."

Sam shrugged. "I guess...Hey, um, do you guys want to go outside for a little bit? I'm sort of sick of everyone coming up to me and telling me how sorry they are."

"Sure," Carly replied.

The trio quickly snuck out a nearby exit that led to the parking lot. Not even caring that she was wearing a brand new dress, Sam sat right down on the asphalt. Freddie and Carly sat down on either side of her.

"I want this to be over," Sam sighed. "The only funeral I've ever been to was that one we crashed to try and get that coconut cream pie recipe…they really suck."

"It's almost done," Freddie told her, squeezing her hand. "Just another hour."

Sam looked down at the ground. "Carly?"

"Yeah?"

"What's it like?"

Carly gave her best friend a confused look. "What's what like?"

"Not having a mom," Sam whispered. "Your mom died too…so does it always feel this awful?"

"Sam, I-I don't really know," Carly answered honestly. "I don't really remember that. I was only two. I never got a chance to really know her."

"Oh," Sam said. "Right…"

"But you know what?" Carly told her. "At least you got that chance. I mean, I guess in some ways it was easier for me, not remembering anything about my mom, but it's also really sad. I have no memories of her. You have seventeen years of memories of you and your mom, Sam. I know it must hurt so much right now, but years from now, you'll still have those memories to look back on."

Sam looked up and gave Carly the first genuine smile she had shown in days. "Thanks, Carls."

Carly gave her a hug. "Of course."

Sam let out a deep breath. "Well…I guess I should go back in there. Melanie's probably looking for me."

"I'll go find her," Carly said, getting to her feet. "Why don't you take a few more minutes out here?"

"Okay," Sam agreed.

Carly dusted off her dress as she headed back into the funeral home, leaving Freddie and Sam alone.

Sam began to trace small circles on the back of Freddie's palm. Freddie kissed the top of her head.

"She's right you know," Freddie said. "This pain you're feeling right now…it's not going to last forever. It may come once in awhile, but eventually when you think of your mom, you won't think about today, at her funeral. You'll think about all the times you two stayed up late watching the surgery channel together or your 'shopping trips' or the time when she packed you a 'C' battery for lunch."

Sam rested her head on his shoulder. "How long you think that's going to take?"

"I don't know," Freddie replied truthfully. "But you'll get there baby…You'll get there. And I'll be here for you the whole way."


	404. Chapter 404

**AN-Hey, sorry I haven't updated in awhile. But I actually just got a chance to see the Sam and Cat reunion special, and all I can say is…FINALLY MY SEDDIE DREAMS WEREN'T CRUSHED BY DAN SCHNIEDER! True, we didn't exactly get to see them get back together, but he definitely confirmed that Seddie is NOT over, which is what I really wanted. Plus he **_**did **_**tweet hints about a sequel, so you never know…**

**Anyway, this oneshot is sort of iOMG…but with the roles switched. Hope you enjoy. **

…**..**

_Beginner_

"So when Freddie gets here we can ask him if he'd be able to work his special effect magic to make it look like Gibby's on fire during our next Idiot Farm Girl skit," Carly said as her and Sam sat at the Shay's kitchen table, planning out the next iCarly.

"Or we can set him on fire for real and save the nub the trouble," Sam suggested.

"Sam," Carly sighed. "What did we say about controlling our violent thoughts?"

"Fine," Sam moaned. "We don't have to set Gibby on fire."

"Good girl," Carly said approvingly.

"Dude, where's Fredward anyway?" Sam asked. "He was supposed to be here twenty minutes ago. This is totally unprofessional; he's _never _allowed to say anything about me sleeping through rehearsal again."

"Relax, I'm sure he just got tied up at home," Carly said. "His mom probably bombarded him with a tick bath or something."

"Something's wrong with that woman," Sam said simply. "Hey, do you have anymore of that ham that Spencer got from the hobo at the street fair left? I'm starving."

"Yeah, I think," Carly nodded. "It's in the-"

"Hey, sorry I'm late," Freddie said, sweaty and out of breath.

"Dude, why do you smell like a locker room?" Sam asked, gagging.

"Because I _happened _to be working out at the gym," Freddie replied.

"Pfft, what gym would let you in?" Sam smirked. "I didn't know they made five pound dumbbell sets."

"I can bench more than five pounds," Freddie snapped.

"Guys, behave," Carly said, rolling her eyes. She turned to Freddie. "But seriously…I never knew you went to the gym."

"Well since my mom's work schedule got switched around a few months ago, my weekday afternoons are no longer booked with puzzles, knitting and scrapbooking…so I figured, why not? Just don't let my mom know, she'll freak out," Freddie told her.

"We wont," Carly assured him. "I think it's cool that you're starting to work out."

"You do?" Freddie said.

"Sure," Carly nodded. "Just try and not be like Spencer. He always joins gyms for a week and then spends the next six months 'recovering' by eating donuts on our couch."

"Smart man," Sam grinned.

"Trust me, I won't do that," Freddie said.

"That's what they all say," Sam teased in a singsong voice.

"Not when I'm getting results like this," Freddie retorted, pulling off his jacket, flexing his newly developed muscles.

Carly nearly choked on her drink she had been sipping. "Whoa! When did you get _those_?"

"I told you, I've been going for awhile," Freddie said, still proudly showing off. "You just haven't noticed because it's winter and my mom won't let me leave the house without at least three jackets on."

"Well," Carly chuckled. "Good work. Looks like our little tech producer grew up, Sam."

"Eh, so the dork has to buy bigger shirts now," Sam shrugged. "Big whoop. Until he can beat_ Mama _in arm wrestling he'll always be our scrawny little computer monkey." She grinned as she pinched his cheek.

"Ow!" Freddie said indignantly.

"Alright you guys, let's just finish planning out the next iCarly," Carly said, hoping to avoid yet another argument between the two. "We need to get everything done before this weekend, remember? We'll be too busy during the lock-in to work on it."

"Oh right, that's _this _weekend," Freddie nodded, sitting down at the table.

"Exactly," Carly said. "And this time, Sam, could you at least _try _and refrain from drawing _things _on Gibby's forehead."

"No promises," Sam said.

…..

"-And that's it for tonight's iCarly!" Carly said as her and Sam wiped off their mustard-covered hands.

"Where we learned that stray cats do _not _like to be bathed with mustard!" Sam grinned.

"So tune in next week, where we see what happens when we try to clean a hedgehog with ketchup," Carly said.

"And mayonnaise!" Sam added.

"If Sam doesn't eat all of it first…again!" Carly chuckled.

"I probably will," Sam said honestly.

"And we're clear," Freddie announced. "Hey, you guys were both really funny tonight. Good job."

"Thanks," Carly and Sam said simultaneously.

"I mean _really _good stuff," Freddie continued. "Probably our best show to date."

"You really think?" Carly asked.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded.

"Aw man," Sam moaned, looking at her phone. "I completely forgot I was supposed to go to the store and get the mice I needed for my semester project, and now the dang pet store's closed!"

"Sam, you said you had everything you needed!" Carly groaned.

"Well you know I'm irresponsible!" Sam fired back. "Ugh, I can't believe Mr. Howard said I can't work with you on this stupid thing."

"Because he knows that when we work together, _I _do all the work," Carly said, planting her hands on her hips.

"Hey, I made us snacks the whole time you worked on our history project last month," Sam pointed out.

"You _ate _all of them!" Carly exclaimed.

"Hey, you know, I don't have a partner either," Freddie spoke up.

"Aren't you working with Gibby?" Sam said.

"No, Gibby's working with me, remember?" Carly told her.

"Oh…gross," Sam said.

"So, if you want," Freddie continued. "You can work with me."

Carly and Sam gave him strange looks.

"Um, you want _me _to work with you?" Sam asked hesitantly.

"Sure, it would be better than spending the entire lock-in working by myself," Freddie shrugged.

"Dude, aren't you making some dumb computer app?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, Mood Face," Freddie nodded. "It can tell someone's mood just by them looking into the screen."

"Well I know _nothing _about that dumb tech stuff," Sam told him.

"Eh, I have most of the work done anyway," Freddie said. "I really just need people to help me test it out."

"Um…okay," Sam said. "That's less work for me."

"You sure you're up for this, Freddie?" Carly asked. "Sam's not exactly famous for pulling her own weight on group projects."

Sam looked at her.

"Oh you know I love you," Carly smiled, rolling her eyes.

"It's fine, Carly," Freddie chuckled. "Like I said, most of the work's done."

"Well okay,' Carly said. "Just so long as you know what you're getting into…"

…

Three days later, at the Ridgeway High School lock-in, Sam leaned over Freddie's tech cart, looking at what he had done on the app so far. It was pretty impressive, to say the least.

_Ha, I'm so guaranteed an A!_ Sam thought triumphantly.

Freddie had asked her to start preparing the app for test runs while he ran off to get his camera and a few cables from the AV club supply closet.

_Maybe I should actually do that…_Sam thought to herself. Freddie _was _doing most of the work, after all.

"Hey!" a voice said brightly behind her, and Sam turned around to see Carly walking into the room.

"Oh, hey, Carls," Sam greeted her friend. "How goes the project?"

"Not bad, right now Gibby's seeing how Spencer reacts to Helium," Carly explained. "How are you guys doing? You're actually working, right Sam?"

"Well I'm trying!" Sam snapped. "I don't know how to do this app stuff! I told him that!"

"Well you know, I think it was really nice of Freddie to offer to let you work with him on this project," Carly said firmly. "So the least you can do is not make him do every little thing, okay?"

"Relax, I'll help…sort of," Sam promised.

"Well where is Freddie anyway?" Carly asked rolling her eyes.

"He's-" Sam began, but she was cut off as Freddie came back into the room, his arms full with his camera and mountains of cords.

"Okay, I got my camera, three auxiliary cords, my USB, and some freshly baked brownies," Freddie announced as Sam helped him with the equipment.

"Oh, mind if I steal a brownie?" Carly asked, smiling.

"Sure, go for it," Freddie nodded, handing the container to Carly.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Sam said quickly, snatching the container away before her best friend could take a desert.

"What?" Freddie frowned.

"These aren't those weird health brownies your mom makes that you always try to get rid of with us, are they?" Sam asked, giving the container a suspicious sniff.

"No, they're real, chocolately brownies," Freddie said. "No spinach, beets, or squash."

"Then eat one," Sam smirked.

"Fine," Freddie shrugged, picking up a brownie and placing it into his mouth. "See? No gagging. Help yourself to the rest if you want."

"Don't have to tell me twice," Sam said, digging in.

"Well, I have to get back to my project," Carly said. "You know, before Gibby kills my brother. Later!"

"Bye, Carly!" Freddie called after her.

"Okay," Sam sighed as Carly left. "What else do I have to do?"

"Here, why don't you just test the app out on me?" Freddie asked. "We've already tested it out on you and nine other girls, so we need one more guy to make it even for each gender."

"Yeah, I guess you can qualify as a guy for the sake of this project," Sam grinned.

Freddie rolled his eyes, but said nothing.

"So what do I do?" Sam asked.

"Just press the sync button on the Pearpad," Freddie told her, sitting down in front of the camera. "This app is designed to be able to be used by someone with even a beginner's knowledge in technology."

"You calling me stupid?" Sam frowned.

"No, just press the button," Freddie sighed.

"Alright, alright," Sam said, pressing the button. She watched as the app started to run and hundred of expressions flashed onto the screen. After about a moment, the screen blinked and underneath the photo of Freddie's face read 'In Love'.

Sam blinked as she stared at Freddie's apparent mood. _In love_? she thought to herself. _Who is the nub in love with?_

But the answer to that question came almost instantly to her. After all, there was only one girl who Freddie had continually proclaimed his love for since meeting her: Carly Shay. Still, though, Sam was a little shocked. She thought that Freddie's crush on Carly had died down at least a little since then. He no longer spent his days looking at his peephole across the hall at her apartment or followed her around like a puppy, after all.

"So what did my mood show up as?" Freddie asked, getting to his feet.

"Um…" Sam said lamely. "It-It didn't read."

"It was inconclusive?" Freddie frowned. "Weird."

"Yeah…I'm gonna go find some ham," Sam said quickly, deleting Freddie's mood test and jolting out of the room.

This was pretty interesting chiz…As Sam walked through the hallways of the school, Sam wondered whether or not she should tell Carly. They were best friends and had an unspoken obligation to share this sort of information, yet she couldn't help feel that that would wind up creating more problems. Carly would freak out and she would probably have to go and confront Freddie and there be all sorts of feelings involved…Still, though, it wasn't often she found out something like this. Part of her _did _want to share it with someone…

She turned the corner and saw Gibby taking a drink from a water fountain.

_He'll do_, Sam shrugged as she approached the boy.

"Hey, Gib," Sam said, slapping him on the back.

"No, Sam!" Gibby yelled, clutching his forehead. "Not again!"

"I'm not going to draw anything on your forehead," Sam snapped. "Calm down!"

"I can't calm down! I still have flashbacks to those pictures you put on the Internet!"

"Do you want to know some _information_ about Freddie or not?" Sam asked, slightly annoyed.

"Information?" Gibby repeated.

"You know how Freddie made that Mood Face App for our project?" Sam said.

Gibby nodded. "Yeah. So?"

"Well, he made me test it on him," Sam said slowly. "And guess what his mood was?"

"I dunno…green?"

"What? Gibby!" Sam exclaimed, thumping him on the back of his head. "In love! His mood was _in love_."

"Huh, that's weird," Gibby said. "Who's he in love with?"

"Duh? Who do you think?" Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Carly."

"Shut up!" Gibby gasped. "I thought he was over her."

"So did I," Sam said. "I thought once they sort of dated after he saved her life, he realized how awkward and weird and stupid and annoying and obnoxious and sickening they were together. But I guess this kind of makes sense…He's been showing off his muscles from the gym lately, and the other day he willingly went to the mall with us and didn't complain when Carly spent three hours in Glitter Gloss…Oh, and I bet he agreed to let me work on this project with him to impress her with his niceness or something. Dang…I thought this chiz was over!"

"Yeah, they were an awful couple," Gibby nodded. "So how are we going to get them together?"

"Huh?" Sam frowned. "You just said-"

"I know, but if Carly gets together with Freddie before this lock-in is done, I might be able to have a few seconds of peace," Gibby said. "Have you ever worked with her before? She's a nightmare! She's bossy and controlling."

"Yeah, why do you think I never do any work when we're together," Sam smirked. "But she's your problem now. I'm not hooking those two up."

"What? Why?" Gibby moaned.

"Because," Sam said. "It's totally lame."

"But-But what if they're really happy together and we never get bossed around by either of them again?" Gibby asked.

"No!" Sam said firmly.

"What if I…I give you my gift certificate to Tub of Chicken I just got for my birthday?" Gibby offered.

Sam pondered this for a moment. "How much is it worth?"

"Fifty bucks."

Sam sighed in defeat. "Fine!" she said. "But you're doing all the work, got it?"

"Okay," Gibby agreed.

Just then, Carly came around the corner. "Gibby!" she said loudly. "What are you doing? I told you to go get some more baking powder and vanilla for our project. We need to finish three more trials by midnight tonight if we're going to stick to my schedule!"

"You see what I mean?" Gibby hissed to Sam as Carly grabbed his wrist and pulled him away.

….

Freddie leaned against his locker, looking through some old text messages. He had gotten restless waiting for Sam to come back into the room, so he decided to take a break as well.

"Hey," Gibby said, grinning from ear to ear as he walked over to Freddie.

"Oh, hey Gib," Freddie replied, putting his phone away. "Have you seen Sam by chance? She left to find some ham but she never came back, and I want to see if she can 'persuade' a few more people to get tested with the app so we can-"

"Hey, I don't really care about that, so shut up for a sec," Gibby said.

"Um, alright," Freddie frowned.

"So," Gibby said, placing a hand on Freddie's shoulder. "I heard."

"Hear what?" Freddie asked, giving the boy a strange look.

"That you're smitten with a certain lady friend of ours," Gibby said, beaming.

"Did you just say smitten?"

"Dude, this is fantastic!" Gibby said, ignoring Freddie's comment. "If you get together with her, I can have the rest of the night to finally have some Gibby time! Do you know how badly my toenails need a trim?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Freddie said quickly. "_What _are you talking about?"

"You're in love with Carly!" Gibby exclaimed.

Freddie's eyes widened. "Um, _no _I'm not."

"Yes you are," Gibby said, crossing his arms. "Sam told me that when she tested your Mood App thingy on you, it showed that you were_ in love_."

"S-So?" Freddie said, a bit uncomfortable. "That doesn't mean I'm in love. It's a stupid computer app."

"That _you _made!"

"Gibby, you're ridiculous," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "I'm not in love with Carly. Now I'm going to go back and try to do some work on my project."

"Wait, no!" Gibby called after him. "What about my toenails!"

"What about your toenails?" Sam asked, coming around the corner just as Freddie disappeared.

"Freddie's being difficult," Gibby explained. "And I can't take all this stress Carly's putting on me, I just can't!"

"You didn't get Freddie to admit he was in love?" Sam asked.

"No!"

"Too bad," Sam shrugged.

"Wait," Gibby said thoughtfully, grabbing Sam's hand.

Sam quickly yanked her hand away and slapped Gibby in the face, but he didn't seem to notice.

"This isn't over," Gibby said. "We can still get this to work and my night will be saved."

"No, you tried, can you just forget about it?" Sam groaned. "Seriously, you're turning into a Carly right now. I should've never told you."

"Just help me with this one thing," Freddie pleaded.

"No, this is just stupid," Sam said firmly. "I'm done. If you must hook them up, do it on your own. Oh, and I'm keeping the Tub of Chicken certificate."

"You can't just stomp all over our deal like that!" Gibby exclaimed.

"Watch me!" Sam retorted as she walked away, leaving Gibby alone in the hallway.

….

"Okay, just a few more adjustments and then…bam!" Freddie said triumphantly, stepping back from his computer. "Looks like this app is all done."

"Sweet!" Sam grinned. "So can I find a corner and fall asleep now?"

"Sure," Freddie chuckled. "I'm just gonna put one or two more finishing touches on the-"

"Ow, Gibby! What are we doing?" Carly snapped as her and Gibby suddenly burst into the room. "We have to work on our project! We just left Spencer in there with level 11 stink gas!"

"Oh my God…" Sam mumbled to herself.

"Just sit for a sec," Gibby said, pushing Carly over next to Freddie.

"I don't seem like such a bad partner now, do I?" Sam smirked at her best friend.

"Compared to him, you're a walk in the park," Carly sighed.

"Gibby, what are you doing?" Freddie asked, confused.

"Attention, everyone!" Gibby said loudly, causing the other students in the room to stop and turn towards him. "There has been a gas leak in this room only. So we need everyone to file out immediately."  
"A gas leak?" Freddie frowned as the panicked students began to rush out of the room. "How could there be a gas leak? This isn't the chemistry lab or anything."

"Yeah, where's the gas coming from?" Carly asked.

"Um, nowhere, I-I didn't say gas leak," Gibby said quickly.

"_Yes_, you did," Freddie nodded. "Now let's go, we need to get out of here."

"No, no, you and Carly are, um, safe from the gas," Gibby said lamely.

"How are we safe from the gas when everyone else isn't?" Carly asked, confused.

Sam rolled eyes. "Should've thought this out more, dude," she said under her breath.

"Gibby…" Freddie started, slowly catching onto what his friend was initiating. "Don't-"

"Well, we'll leave you two to discuss the gas," Gibby said, grabbing Sam's arm and pulling her out the door with him. He poked his head back in and dimmed the lights. "Oh, I'm not coming back," he added.

"Um, has Gibby completely lost it?" Carly asked Freddie as Gibby closed the door.

"Pretty much," Freddie sighed.

….

"See, now this is the life," Gibby said happily, filing his toenails as he sat in front of the controlled sensory stimulus chamber Spencer was currently trapped in. "Having time to do a little maintenance on your feet…"

"Dude! I'm starving!" Spencer exclaimed, pounding on the glass. "Give me some food!"

"Oh, sorry, Carly's supposed to do that," Gibby said simply.

"Well find her!"

"No," Gibby said. "I'm finally getting the me time I deserve! You can't just take a Gibby's Gibby time away! It's totally-"

"Gibby!" a voice behind the teen suddenly cried. "What are you doing?"

Gibby turned around and saw Carly and Freddie entering the room.

"What-What are you guys doing here?" Gibby asked, jumping to his feet.

"There was no gas leak," Carly replied, oblivious to the set-up that had just taken place. "Now what are you doing? You were supposed to see how Spencer reacts to the hot sauce in his chowder at eleven thirty and it's almost midnight! Oh, we're going to have to work through our two o'clock break to make up for this."

"What?" Gibby gasped.

"Yeah, but first can I talk to Gibby for a minute?" Freddie said, crossing his arms. "Or maybe more than a minute?"

"Just be quick," Carly sighed. "With any luck, we can be back on track by five in the morning."

"Five in the-" Gibby exclaimed as Freddie pulled him away.

"Dude," Freddie said firmly, crossing his arms. "That wasn't cool."

"What wasn't cool?" Gibby asked lamely.

"You just faked that gas leak to get me alone with Carly!" Freddie hissed.

"Well yeah," Gibby nodded. "And way to go, man. You screwed it up! You didn't get together with her and now she's going to make me stay up all night."

"I don't want to get together with Carly!" Freddie moaned, frustrated.

"Oh come on," Gibby said. "Your app said you were in love."

"For the millionth time, I don't love Carly!"

"But you've been acting different," Gibby pointed out.

Freddie looked down at his shoes. "No I haven't…"

"Yeah you have," Gibby nodded. "You joined a gym, you tag along with Sam and Carly wherever they go, even to Glitter Gloss, you let Sam work with you on this project to impress Carly."

Freddie didn't reply.

"Look," Gibby said, patting his shoulder. "I just want to have a few hours to myself tonight."  
Freddie shrugged his friend's hand off. "Then hide in the men's room."

And with that he turned and stormed out of the room.

"Men's room…" Gibby repeated thoughtfully. "Huh…that could work too."

…

Freddie sighed as he leaned against the wall of the building outside in the Ridgeway patio. Tonight really hadn't turned out the way he had planned at all…Stupid Gibby.

Suddenly, he heard the back door open up and Sam walked outside.

"Hey," she said.

"What?" Freddie sighed. "Gibby sent you to find me?"

"No," Sam replied simply.

"Oh, so you don't know that we got into a fight?"

"Oh, I know that," Sam said. "But he never told me to come find you."

"Well good," Freddie mumbled.

"But," Sam said. "The moron's not exactly barking up the wrong tree."

"Oh come on!" Freddie cried. "You too?"

"I mean, I know I always teased you and said how Carly would never ever love you," Sam said heavily. "But…you don't have to just assume I'm right."

"For the last time, I don't love Carly!" Freddie yelled.

"Sure," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "You keep bragging about going to the gym, you want to tag along with us wherever we go, even to the girlies places that even I don't want to go to, you're letting me slap my name on your project just to impress her…"

"That doesn't mean I love her," Freddie muttered.

"Well you hate me," Sam shrugged.

"I never said I hate you," Freddie said softly.

Sam laughed. "Ha! Yes you have! We tell each other we hate the other at least five times a day!"

Freddie got to his feet. "Can you just leave?"

"Fine," Sam conceded. "I'll leave."

"Thank you."  
"But first-"

"Ugh!"

"Look," Sam said, her voice serious. "I know it's kind of scary to talk to someone about _those feelings_. You don't want them to reject you and have it be all uncomfortable and chiz. But…you can do it. Just think about how much less sucky you'll feel if-"

And then, out of nowhere, she was cut off as Freddie grabbed her shoulders and crashed his lips to her.

Sam's eyes widened in shock, but she didn't pull away…

Finally, after about eight seconds, Freddie stepped back, his face clearly showing how alarmed he was at his own actions.

"Um…" Sam started, not sure of what to say.

"S-Sorry," Freddie stammered.

"It's cool," Sam said, still completely off guard.

It seemed like she had been quite wrong. Freddie was in love, but it looked like it wasn't with Carly Shay.


	405. Chapter 405

**AN-Takes place during iSpeed Date**

_Police_

Sam stood on Gibby's front porch for a moment, still in shock over what she had just witnessed. Gibby had a _girlfriend_? An attractive one, nonetheless. What was going on in the world?

She shook her head. Well, at least she knew that his rejecting her earlier wasn't anything personal. Still though…who would've ever thought _Gibby _was actually capable of dating?

_Wait till Carly and Freddie hear __**this**__…_Sam smirked. She looked at her phone. There was only about an hour left of the dance; by the time she got to the school, it would be over. She knew that Carly had said something about going to the Groovy Smoothie after the dance. She would just meet them there.

She set off towards the popular hangout, all the way cursing herself for listening to Carly and wearing a skirt and heels. She knew she should've gone with her usual school dance attire of jeans and sneakers.

When she finally reached the Groovy Smoothie, she almost turned around; the place looked deserted. But then she noticed two figures near the back of the store. That had to be Carly and Freddie.

And she was right. Very right, unfortunately.

When Sam stepped inside, her two best friends didn't even notice her. Sam's eyes widened and for the second time that night she felt a wave of complete surprise rush over her.

Carly and Freddie were in each others arms, slow dancing to the music playing throughout the restaurant.

For a moment, Sam stood still, thousands of thoughts circling in her head.

Where were their dates?  
Why weren't they simply talking and laughing over smoothies like she had expected?

Why did they look so happy?

That last thought hit Sam the hardest. Carly and Freddie really did look like they were thoroughly enjoying themselves at the moment. So, not sure of what else to do in her current situation, Sam slowly turned and left the Groovy Smoothie.

She could've caught the last bus of the night to take her back to her house, but for some reason, Sam felt a sudden desire to walk. She hugged her jacket close to her body as she started off into the night, replaying the scene from the restaurant over and over in her head.

She arrived back to her empty house a short while later and immediately kicked off her heels as she flung herself down on her sofa.

_**Why **__were they dancing together like that? _Sam asked herself for what must have been the hundredth time. _That wasn't a fast, fun dance between friends. That was…romantic. What the heck happened at that dance? Did they… hook up?_

Just then, Sam felt her stomach tighten and she frowned. _No, that's impossible. The nub might be crazy for Carly, but Carly's not into Freddie…right?_

But then again, Carly was willingly dancing with him…

Sam let out a loud groan as she threw a couch cushion across the room. Tonight was supposed to be about her getting to shovel down ten pounds of brownies fresh from the PTA at the lame school dance; not having to deal with all this.

Sam sat up and frowned.

"Wait a minute…" she said slowly to herself. "What's the big deal about this? So those two are dancing all close together…that just means that hopefully Carly will completely forget about me ditching the dance! Yeah…and-and Freddie will be all distracted and will finally lay off Gibby rejecting me at school…this could be a good thing."

Yet, even as those words left her mouth, Sam couldn't bring herself to _truly _believe them.

_So are they…a couple now? _Sam thought to herself, looking down at her lap, squeezing her hands together. _Did they just decide to start going out at the dance? _

The idea of her two friends dating made Sam feel like punching one of the few non-broken items in her living room. She knew what would happen…Heck, they couldn't have coupled up more than an hour before she walked into the Groovy Smoothie earlier, and they were already ignoring her and pushing her out of their picture. If this kept up, they would completely degrade her to a third-wheel.

She needed to have Carly as her best friend; she didn't want to be tossed aside! Where would she crash nearly every night? Where would she get her meat fixes from? Who would keep her out of trouble?

Strangely, though, as much as it bothered her to think about Carly in the apparent new relationship, thinking about Freddie in it was almost just as painful…if not _more_.

_That nub's going to be obnoxious with Carly_, Sam thought. _Drooling over her, holding her hand all the time, bringing her flowers and taking her on dates and kissing her…_

Suddenly Sam's phone rang and she looked down at her cell screen and saw that it was Carly calling her.

Sam stared at the phone for a moment. Was she about to hear all about how she was swept off her feet by Freddie tonight?

Part of her didn't want to answer, in fear that that was true. But she _did _want some answers…So taking a deep breath, Sam answered the phone.

"Hey," Sam said, trying to sound normal.

"Hey, Sam, where the heck were you tonight?" Carly asked on the other line. "You didn't come to the dance! I thought you agreed to try to talk Gibby into going with you again. What happened? Did you shove another taco down a police officer's pants? Because-"

"I didn't shove anything down a cop's pants," Sam told her. "And I-I did go talk to Gibby. But he had, um, other plans. Listen, what-"

"Well, you didn't miss to much at the dance," Carly sighed. "It was kind of a dud."

"A dud?" Sam repeated.

"Yeah," Carly replied. "My date sort of…sucked. All he knew how to do was talk about himself! I didn't even get in two words the entire night. Plus that Magic Malika chick Freddie wound up taking did some fancy trick and made the hem of my new skirt catch on fire. It's totally ruined!"

"Too bad," Sam said. "But did anything else happen?"

"Hmmm, no," Carly said simply. "After the dance finished up, Freddie and I went to the Groovy Smoothie with our dates like we said we would, but we wound up getting frustrated with them, so we just hung out by ourselves for a little bit. His mom actually just picked us up ten minutes ago. She's now across the hall trying to fore him to take some weird oatmeal bath. Pretty crazy, right?"

"Sure," Sam said dismissively, wondering why on earth Carly hadn't brought up the fact that her and Freddie were slow dancing at the Groovy Smoothie. "So did anything-"

"You know, I don't think this night was a total bust, though," Carly interrupted. "At the dance, I think I sort of hit it off with Matt Newman from history class. You know, one of my first choices for the dance. Him and I kept winding up at the punch bowl at the same time tonight and we talked for a little bit. We have a lot in common."

"Matt Newman?" Sam frowned.

"Yeah, plus the girl that he went with apparently is a friend of his sister's," Carly said. "They went as friends, which means he's available! Do you want to hit the mall tomorrow to help me find a cute new outfit to wear when I see him at school on Monday?"

"Um, sure," Sam said slowly. "Hey, um, how-how's Freddie doing?"

"I dunno, good I guess," Carly said simply. "You know, other than the oatmeal bath. Why?"

"No reason," Sam said at once. "Just-Just wanted to see if he made it out of his first school dance without his mom as his date."

"Believe me, I think he would've rather have her than Magic Malika by the end of the night," Carly chuckled. "Poor guy. Well, Spencer's been in our storage unit for awhile now, so I'm gonna go run down and make sure he didn't get stuck to anything again. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah, see you," Sam nodded.

She hung up the phone and slid it back into her pocket.

Carly didn't even mention the dance to her, and she was trying to woo in Matt Newman?

_They're not dating…_Sam thought to herself, relief rushing over her. _Their dance…it __**was**__ just friendly._

Sam was beyond thrilled at this news. There would be no changes, no third wheel…everything was going to stay the same. Sam got up from the couch and headed into the kitchen, grabbing a bag of chips and shoving a handful into her mouth.

Tonight might have been a false alarm, but one thing was for sure, she did _not _like the idea of Carly and Freddie getting together. It irked her in a way that she couldn't describe. She wanted to keep telling herself that it was just the far of being the third wheel in the group that made her feel this way, but something deep inside of her kept telling her there was something else that was causing these feelings. Something that she couldn't even begin to explain. Not even to herself.


	406. Chapter 406

**AN-Hey, this oneshot is a little more on the serious side than the rest of them. But if that's not your thing, I uploaded another chapter after this one:) **

…

_Fool_

"And see, now you just enter the information from your last paycheck here," Freddie said, typing in a few items onto Carly's laptop. "And viola! You're already halfway done with your taxes. It's easy."

"Well thanks for making me seem like an idiot for spending eight hours trying to figure this chiz out," Carly mumbled. "I swear, I should've never gotten this stupid idea to do my own taxes this year. I never had any problems when we just forked everything over to an accountant."

"But Carls, I've been telling you this for _years_," Freddie said. "You get such a sense of accomplishment from doing your own taxes. Why give some stuffy old accountant that pleasure?"

"How has Sam managed to live with you for the past twenty-five years without strangling you?" Carly asked, rolling her eyes playfully.

"Ha, ha," Freddie said dryly just as his wife entered their kitchen, talking on her Pearphone.

"Ashton, no. That's not what I said," Sam said, frustrated as she yanked open the refrigerator door and grabbed a root beer. "You're putting words in my mouth!"

"Oh jeez," Freddie sighed.

"Is everything okay?" Carly asked, concerned.

"I don't know," Freddie said, shaking his head as Sam chugged the entire root beer in five seconds flat. "But Sam only drinks that quickly when she's _real _upset."

"All I said was that you _may_ be rushing things a little bit!" Sam continued. "_Maybe_. I didn't say your boyfriend was a total loser!"

"Ah…another boyfriend fight," Freddie mumbled.

"Oh that's right, Clarissa told me Ashton started seeing a new guy," Carly said. "What was his name…Roger?"

"Robert," Freddie corrected darkly.

"Do you not like him?" Carly asked knowingly.

"Nope," Freddie said at once.

"Yeah, well, you've never liked any guy that dates one of the twins," Carly grinned.

"This guy's on the top of my list," Freddie said. "I _really _don't like him."

"Ashton, you've been dating the guy for three weeks!" Sam exclaimed. "All I'm saying is you shouldn't be changing your whole life just to make him happy! I-Ugh!"

She pulled her phone away from her ear and slammed it down on the counter. "She hung up on me!"

"What's going on?" Freddie asked as Sam grabbed a bag of chips from the cabinet and angrily sat down with him and Carly at the table.

"Besides from my blood pressure _sky rocketing?_" Sam snapped.

"Breathe, baby," Freddie said.

"Man, I haven't seen you this wound up since you thought they were getting rid of Fat Cakes," Carly commented.

"Yeah, well, Ashton's doing a good job of recreating that now isn't she?" Sam mumbled.

"Is she okay?" Freddie asked.

"I don't know, she might've hit her head and lost _all _her common sense," Sam said. "You know here and that stupid Robert jerk are moving in together?"

"What?" Freddie cried. "They haven't even dated for a month!"

"Uh-huh," Sam nodded. "And here's the worst part. You know how she's been doing so amazing down at college for the past two years?"

"Yeah," Carly said. "Isn't she going to graduate early next semester and start that great internship with some fashion company?"

"Not anymore!" Sam fumed. "She withdrew for the semester because _Robert _wants to move across the state away from the university and she's not going to miss _that _opportunity!"

"You're kidding," Freddie groaned, rubbing his temples. "She's leaving school? Just to live with that loser!"

"Yes! And when I told her that I thought she should think about this more, she went insane and said that I wasn't _supporting_ her and that I just wanted to control her life!" Sam said. "I swear, this kid is being more difficult now than she ever was when she actually lived here. And the worst part is I can't force her to listen to me anymore!"

"I'm going to kill this guy," Freddie said heavily. "He's wrecking my daughter's life!"

"No chiz!" Sam agreed.

"Um, okay you both seem like you're about to hit something," Carly said, getting to her feet. "Maybe I should leave you two to discuss this."

"Yeah…thanks," Sam sighed, running her fingers through her hair.

The couple waited until Carly had left before they turned back to each other.

"What are we going to do?" Freddie asked.

"I don't know," Sam said softly. "I don't like this guy. He seems so…controlling. You know it wasn't Ashton's idea for her to withdraw from school. I don't want her hanging around him anymore, but when I even _suggest _that she might've made a mistake with him, Ashton winds up getting mad at _me_."

"Well she's twenty," Freddie mumbled. "She-She's an adult. We can't tell her what to do anymore…Even though that would make this all _way _easier."

The two were silent for a moment.

"We need to at least be careful and make sure we don't push Ashton away," Sam said finally.

"I know," Freddie nodded. "We need to let her know that we support her, even though we don't…_agree _with what she's doing right now. Listen, why don't we have the two of them over for dinner? Ashton's supposed to come back up here to grab a few boxes of her old stuff from the attic this weekend anyway, so why don't we just tell her to invite Robert so we can get to know him?"

"We've already met him," Sam pointed out. "When we went down to California to visit Ashton when they first started dating three weeks ago. Don't you remember? She was supposed to spend the day with us but then _Robert _told her that she needed to spend the day with him instead."

"I know," Freddie said, gritting his teeth at the memory. "But it's like you said, we don't want to push Ashton away. At least if we make an effort, she'll feel more supported."

Sam sighed as she pushed the now-empty bag of chips away. "Fine. But this is only for Ashton."

….

"Remember Sam, be _nice_," Freddie said as he set the dining room table. "Don't jump down her throat when they get here."

"I _will _be nice," Sam snapped as she finished preparing a large bowl of potatoes. "Tyler! Go put this on the table!"

"Alright, alright," the sixteen-year old said, taking the bowl from his mother. "Jeez, you're in a mood."

"Tyler, if you know what's good for you, you'll lay off," Freddie sighed as Sam turned back to the stove, where she began stirring a pot of vegetables in a rich cheese sauce; Ashton's favorite.

"When are they getting here? They said they'd be here by six," Sam said. "It's six twenty."

"I'm sure they just hit traffic," Freddie assured her. "Don't get so worked up about-"

Just then there was a knock at the door.

Freddie hurried over and opened up the front door, revealing his daughter and a tall, muscular man.

"Hi dad," Ashton smiled, stepping into the house.  
"Hey sweetheart," Freddie said, giving her a hug. "I've missed you a lot."

"Me too," Ashton said.

The man behind her cleared his throat impatiently.

"Oh, um, dad," Ashton said, taking the man's hand. "You remember Robert, right? I think you met him briefly a few weeks ago when you came to visit."

"Yeah, briefly," Freddie said, plastering a fake smile on his face. "Before your parents, who drove twelve hours to see you, were left in the dust…Nice to officially meet you, Robert."

"You too, Mr. Benson," Robert said, shaking Freddie's outstretched hand.

Freddie looked back over at Ashton. He could tell that something was different about her. She didn't have her usual beaming smile and her brown eyes weren't shining like they always had.

"Right," Freddie said, quickly releasing Robert's hand. "Well, dinner's ready and your mom and brother are in the kitchen, Ashton."

"Okay," Ashton nodded, still holding Robert's hand as she led him into the kitchen.

Freddie took a deep breath as he followed the couple. He just wanted to get through this night.

"Hi, Ty," Ashton said, greeting her younger brother.

"Hey," Tyler said, giving her a quick hug. He eyed Robert uneasily, undoubtedly having heard his parents discussing him at some point, but said nothing.

Ashton looked over at Sam, who was standing by the stove still.

"Hey mom," Ashton said simply.

"Hey Ash," Sam said, though she was glaring at Robert.

"Um, thanks for having Robert and I over for dinner," Ashton said.

"Yeah, well, we've missed _you_," Sam said.

"You know, I was looking at the weather report for tonight and it looks like it's going to rain," Freddie said as everybody began to sit down around the table. "It might be a good idea if you two just spent the night here instead of trying to make it back all the way to California."

"I'd like that-" Ashton began, but she was cut off quickly by her boyfriend.

"That's okay," Robert said firmly. "We really only have time to stay for dinner. Then we need to go."

Ashton looked down at her lap. "Thanks though," she mumbled.

Freddie bit his tongue as Sam sat down next to him.

"So Ashton," Sam said as everybody began to help themselves. "I made those vegetables that you used to love. You know, with the special cheese sauce and everything."

"Oh," Ashton said, glancing over at Robert. "Um, actually…I-I think I'm going to pass on those."

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"

"Yeah," Ashton nodded. "I've been trying to watch my figure, so I started this new diet and I've been staying away from fatty sauces."

"Ashton, what are you talking about? You don't need to watch your figure," Freddie said.

"Well, it never hurts to start a healthier diet," Robert shrugged, putting his arm around Ashton. "Right hon?"

"Right," Ashton said with what both Sam and Freddie could tell was a strained smile.

"Okay," Sam said, trying to keep herself from throwing something at Robert. "That's _fine_."

"Whoa, babe, slow down on those potatoes," Robert said as Ashton started to pile her plate. "You had that bagel this morning, remember?"

"Believe it or not, it's _normal _for people to eat more than three hundred calories a day," Tyler said coldly.

Sam hid a proud smile behind her napkin.

"I'm just trying to make sure that Ashton treats herself right," Robert said, narrowing his eyes.

"Weird…She somehow managed to do that before _you _came along," Tyler spat.

"Tyler, stop," Ashton whispered.

"Tyler, enough," Freddie said firmly.

Tyler started to open his mouth to argue, but thought better of it and went back to his plate.

The five finished dinner in silence. Once the table was cleared, Robert got to his feet.

"Well, this was fun, Mr. and Mrs. Benson," he said. "We'll have to do this again sometime, but we need to head back. Babe, go grab whatever junk you were supposed to get and let's go."

"Hold on," Sam said, standing up as well. "Why the rush?"

"Mom, he's right, we-we should get going," Ashton said quickly.

"You really drove all the way here to barely eat anything and then leave?" Sam said, crossing her arms.

"If you guys are planning on going all the way back to California," Freddie said as Ashton was about to speak. "You're going to need to get some gas first. Robert, why don't you go fill up the car and give Ashton a few minutes to get the stuff she came to pick up?"

"I can get gas on the way back," Robert replied.

Freddie pulled out his walled and handed a few bills to him. "Consider it my treat."

Robert reluctantly took the money. "Okay," he finally agreed. He looked over at Ashton. "I'll be back in twenty."

"Bye," Ashton said, giving him a quick kiss. "I'll miss you."

Sam waited until she heard the front door close behind him before turning to her daughter.

"Ashton-" she began.

"Mom, don't!" Ashton moaned.

"What are you _doing_?" Sam exclaimed. "This guy is horrible for you!"

"I happen to _love _him!" Ashton retorted.

"You've known him for a month!" Sam cried. "And in that month you've stopped eating, you've withdrawn from school and decided to move away from everybody!"

"You're just mad that for once you're not controlling my life!"

"Well I _should _be controlling it because right now you're doing a pretty good job of screwing it up!" Sam yelled.

"Sam, stop," Freddie said, stepping in between the two.

"This is why I didn't even want to come here!" Ashton frowned, close to tears. "Because all _she _wants to do is criticize my relationship!"

"Relationship?" Sam scoffed. "You don't have a relationship! You have-"

"She's worried about you," Freddie said to Ashton, cutting Sam off. "And so am I. Sweetheart…I-I don't know how I feel about Robert."

"What's wrong with him?" Ashton asked harshly.

"You mean besides the fact that he made you leave school and won't stop pressuring you about what you eat?" Freddie said.

"He didn't make me leave school," Ashton snapped. "I withdrew for a _semester_. It's not like I dropped out! I just want to see how I like living in the real world."

"Oh, so _Robert _had nothing to do with it?" Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Stop talking about him like that!"

"Ashton, you were so happy in college," Freddie said slowly. "You were making straight A's, you had that great internship lined up, you were going to graduate early…"

"So now you're saying I'm throwing my future away just because I want to be with a boy I _love_?" Ashton frowned, crossing her arms.

"I'm not saying that," Freddie said, taking a deep breath.

"I am," Sam mumbled under her breath.

"Robert _loves _me," Ashton said firmly. "That's why he cares about what I eat. He wants me to be healthy. Excuse me for not being like _you _mom and shoveling anything that's deep fried into my mouth."

"Ashton-" Freddie began.

"And you know, you didn't give _Emma _a hard time at _all _when she moved in with Quincy last year," Ashton pointed out. "And you didn't say a word when Jason and Eileen moved in together."

"Jason and Eileen are engaged," Freddie said. "And Emma and Quincy have been together since high school. Plus Quincy's a gentleman and-"

"Oh, so now my boyfriend's not a gentleman like Emma's?" Ashton snapped.

"Ashton, open your eyes, will you!" Sam exclaimed. "Robert's _changed _you! He's not a good guy, I can _tell_! He's _controlling_. He tells you where to go, what to eat…Ashton…" she suddenly lowered her voice. "Does he do anything else?"

Ashton narrowed her eyes. "How dare you accuse Robert of that?"

"Ashton," Freddie said, his voice suddenly shaking. "We _love _you. _We_ do. Your mom and dad. We don't want you to get hurt or-"

Just then Robert walked into the kitchen.

"I filled up the car," he announced. "Now come on Ashton, let's go. We're already behind schedule."

"Yeah, let's leave," Ashton said cruelly, giving her parents one last glare. "I'll send for my things."

….

Two weeks had passed since Ashton and Robert's visit, and she still hadn't said one word to her parents. Sam and Freddie tried calling her, but were continually met with her voicemail. They asked Jason and Tyler to try calling her as well, but they got the same results. Clarissa and Quincy tried, but no matter how many times they tried, they couldn't get a hold of her. Even Emma seemed to have been cut out of Ashton's life.

"-And Quincy and I are thinking of driving down to California tomorrow and tracking her down so she'll be forced to talk to us," Emma told her father over the phone late one night. "What the heck happened with her?"

"I'm not sure," Freddie sighed.

"All I know is that if I ever get my hands on that stupid Robert freak, I'm gonna let him have it," Emma said. "I knew I didn't like him."

"None of us do, Em," Freddie said heavily. "Now it's late. I know you have early classes tomorrow so get some sleep and try not to worry about your sister."

"Yeah," Emma mumbled. "G'night."

Freddie hung up the phone and leaned back against the couch. Him and Sam had talked about possibly going down to California themselves to talk to Ashton, though he knew that if they were to do that, it would likely just result in another fight. But him and Sam were getting desperate. They wanted to at least _hear _from Ashton to know if she was alright. He was close to calling the cops at this point.

He looked down at his watch. It really _was_ late. Sam was already upstairs; she had said she was going to sleep a few hours ago, but he knew she was probably laying in their bed, just as worried as he was.

Slowly, he got to his feet and started for the stairs. Just as he stepped onto the first step, though, he heard a soft knock at the door.

_It's past midnight_, Freddie frowned. _Who would come over this late?_

Freddie headed back to the front door and looked through the peephole.

"Oh man," Freddie breathed, quickly opening up. "Ash…"

He pulled his daughter into his arms at once, though not before seeing a sight that made his heart shatter. Ashton's face was bruised and her lip was swollen and she had tears streaming from her face.

"Ashton," Freddie said gently, sitting her down on the couch, still hugging her tightly. "What-What happened-Did he-"

"We got in a fight," Ashton squeaked, her voice shaking. "And-And I didn't know where else to go, so I drove here and-"

"Okay, it's okay," Freddie said, rubbing her back like he used to when she was younger.

"He wanted me to get all dressed up and go out with him to pick up his suit from the dry cleaners," Ashton said, still crying. "But it was late…and I was tired and I didn't feel well. I told him I would go with him later, but he said I had to go do it now. And then he just…lost it. All of the sudden. He started hitting me…"

Freddie felt his blood boil. How dare someone do this to his daughter? How dare someone hurt her like this.

And then he felt a surge of guilt…why hadn't he forced Ashton to stay at home that night she had come home for dinner? He should've done a better job of protecting his baby girl.

"I'm sorry," Ashton whispered, burying her head in Freddie's shoulder.

"No, sweetie, you didn't do anything," Freddie said.

"I didn't listen," Ashton mumbled. "I was stupid…I should've-"

"Hey, listen," Freddie said firmly. "You didn't do anything, Ashton. You understand me? You didn't do anything wrong. You're not stupid; you're far from stupid. Right now, you're not even going to give that-that _monster _another thought. We're going to get you cleaned up and then you're going to stay here as long as you need, okay?"

A fresh batch of tears began to fall from Ashton's eyes. "He has all my stuff…I shouldn't have moved in there with him…He has my credit cards and all my clothes and-"

"We'll replace them," Freddie said at once. "You're not going back there."

"Freddie? What's going on?" Sam asked, coming downstairs. "I heard-"

Ashton looked up at her mother, who was standing at the foot of the stairs and let out a soft sob.

Sam didn't say anything as she quickly rushed over to her and wrapped her arms around her.

"You were right, mom," Ashton sniffed.

"Shh," Sam said, shaking her head. "Don't."

Ashton sat with her parents until the sun began to rise. Then Sam slowly helped her to her feet and went with her upstairs to help her get cleaned up.

….

Sam and Freddie wasted no time in pressing charges against Robert. Frankly both of them, especially Sam, would've loved to take the law into their own hands and serve him their own justice, though.

Emma, Jason and Tyler were ready to kill Robert as well, though they channeled their rage into helping Ashton, especially Emma.

Sam and Freddie managed to convince Ashton to move back in with them, at least until she could get back on her feet. And even though Ashton wanted everyone to stop fussing over her and treating her as if she were fragile, she reluctantly agreed that she needed her parents right now.

"Hey," Sam said a few weeks later as her and Freddie stepped into Emma and Ashton's old bedroom, where Ashton was currently staying. "Whatcha up to?"

"Nothing," Ashton sighed, shutting her laptop. "I was just trying to find an Internship or something to start up again when I go back to school next semester."

"Any luck?" Freddie asked.

"I found a couple of places," Ashton shrugged. "None as good as the place I gave up last semester, though. I guess I really blew that…"

"Hey, you'll find something," Sam said encouragingly.

"Maybe," Ashton mumbled. "Although I haven't exactly been good at finding decent things lately."

"Sweetheart," Freddie said, putting a comforting arm around her. "You've _got _to stop blaming yourself for this. It wasn't your fault."

"Everybody keeps telling me that," Ashton said, shaking her head. "But I still can't help but think…I should've known Robert was no good. God, I was such a fool. He always go so angry over stupid things…I mean, I've read all about this sort of thing in my Psychology books at school. I should've-"

"Don't worry about what your should've done," Sam said firmly. "Focus on now."

"I know, I know," Ashton said. "But…_why_ did I fall for him?"

"People like him…they draw you in," Sam said gently. "They know how to act."

"I guess I was just desperate," Ashton sighed. "I-I just wanted someone to be with. Pretty stupid."

"Everyone feels that way sometimes," Freddie said.

"No, not everyone," Ashton said miserably. "You and mom never did. You got married practically right out of high school. And Jason's getting married soon and he's only four years older than me and him and Eileen have been together since high school too. And it's only a matter of time before Emma and Quincy tie the knot. It's like I'm the only one who hasn't fallen head-over-heels in love yet. I guess…I guess that's why I let myself fall for Robert. He said he loved me and I thought I could force myself to love him. But, well, he obviously lied about that."

"But who says you have to be in love right now?" Sam pointed out. "You're _twenty_,"

"The same age you and daddy were when you got married," Ashton said softly.

Sam and Freddie exchanged looks.

"Ashton, I-I know it might be hard," Freddie said. "But-But you don't have to find your perfect match right away."

"But you and-"

"So be different," Freddie said. "I know you, Ashton. I know you have much bigger dreams than just getting married as soon as possible. You want to finish college and start your own fashion company. You want to go to Europe. You want to learn to Scuba Dive and take your painting further…You have so much ahead of you."

"I just don't want to be alone," Ashton whispered.

"Ashton, you're never going to be alone," Sam said. "You'll always have me and your dad. And Emma and your brothers. And Clarissa. And you're a beautiful girl. I don't think you realize that. You don't think you get guys attention? You don't have to settle for someone who's not good enough for you. You'll find someone, someone who wouldn't even _dream _of hurting you. But it doesn't have to be right now."

Ashton didn't reply.

Sam gave her a shoulder a small squeeze. "I'm gonna run to the store, okay? You want anything?"

"Whatever you buy is fine," Ashton said quietly. "Thanks mom."  
Sam gave her warm smile before leaving the room, leaving her and Freddie.

"Hey," Freddie said, kissing the top of your head. "You're going to get through this, okay? I'm so proud of you for coming this far already."

"You make me sound like some big hero," Ashton mumbled.

"That's because you are one," Freddie said. "Sweetie…I wish more than anything I could go back and keep what happened to you from happening. You didn't deserve it; no one does. But it happened and I know you're going to get past it because you're one of the strongest women I know. I meant what I said earlier; you _do _have so much ahead of you. This isn't going to change that."

Ashton rested her head on her father's shoulder. "I love you, daddy."

Freddie hugged her tight. "I love you too."


	407. Chapter 407

_Belt_

"That's it! The woman's crazy!" Freddie announced angrily, storming into the Shay's apartment.

"Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if we _locked _that door," Spencer that thoughtfully.

"What happened?" Carly sighed, looking up from the homework she had been working on in the kitchen with Gibby.

"My mom has _lost _it!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Well to be fair, she never really had it, did she?" Gibby pointed out.

"Says the guy who I just had to yell at for trying to make his own moisturizer out of peanut butter," Carly smirked. She turned back to Freddie. "What's going on with your mom?"

"She's just on my case," Freddie sighed. "She claims that ever since I started dating Sam, I've gotten a 'delinquent attitude'."

"Have you?" Spencer asked.

"No!" Freddie replied. "But she thinks every time I don't want to go along with her to one of her Aggressive Parenting meetings or object to a tick bath I'm _sassing _her. So today, when I told her that I didn't _need _to wear some industrial strength belt she got on sale from some catalogue, she starting going on and on about how her sweet little boy has been _tainted _by Sam."

"What color was the belt?" Gibby asked.  
"What?" Freddie frowned.

"Well I'm just saying maybe you should've rethought wearing that one, because the one your wearing now is a little bit of an eyesore, dude," Gibby said.

"Okay, so your mom overreacted about you not wearing some belt," Carly said before Freddie could reply. "Big deal. You should be used to that by now. I mean, we're talking about the woman who wouldn't let you go on the sixth grade trip to the water park because she couldn't find you a swimsuit that 'properly covered your ankles'."

"I know," Freddie said. "But, well, this time my mom overreacted a little more than usual."

"What do you mean?" Spencer questioned.

"You see," Freddie said heavily. "Since my mom's now so convinced that Sam's made me into some sort of rebel, she-she-she's making me take dance lessons!"

Carly, Spencer and Gibby all burst out laughing.

"It's not funny!" Freddie snapped.

"Yeah…it's a little funny," Carly grinned.

"Wait, why _dance _lessons?" Spencer asked.

"I don't know," Freddie said miserably. "I guess because she thinks it will teach discipline or something. I just wish I could get out of it, but she says I have to finish the course she signed me up for at the community center or she's going to take back my nature channel privileges."

"Wow, you really have an _interesting _life," Carly said.

"So what are you going to do?" Gibby asked.

"I dunno," Freddie shrugged. "I guess I'm going to have to do the dance lessons. I'm too far into _Elephant Diaries _to risk no seeing the finale."

"Hey, maybe it won't be so bad," Spencer said encouragingly. "You'll get some exercise…and you'll have an excuse to wear tights."

"Thanks," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Look, guys, can you just promise me you won't tell Sam about this?"

"Why not?" Carly asked. "She's your _girlfriend_."

"Yes, but she's still _Sam_," Freddie pointed out. "And she's never going to let me live this down."

"Fine," Carly conceded. "But I don't feel right about lying to my best friend."

"It's not a lie," Freddie said. "Just don't say anything and-"

"Hey, hey," Sam said, coming into the apartment.

"Um, hey," Freddie said quickly. "What-What are you doing here?"

"Don't we have iCarly rehearsal today?" Sam frowned.

"Oh, right," Freddie nodding, giving a nervous laugh.

"You okay?" Sam asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, I'm great!" Freddie said with a bit too much enthusiasm. "Peachy!"

"You're being weird," Sam said.

"Eh, it's just because his mom is making him take dance lessons," Gibby said.

"Gibby!" Freddie cried. "I told you not to say anything!"

"Oh was that starting now?" Gibby frowned. "Sorry, my bad."

"You're taking _dance _lessons?" Sam said, looking as though Christmas had come early.

"Fine, yes," Freddie conceded. "My mom's making me."

"Oh my God…this is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me," Sam said, beaming.

"Sam, please don't harass your boyfriend," Carly sighed.

"Come on, this is gold!" Sam said. "So are you going to wear a leotard, Fredward? Are you going to dance to Swan Lake? Oh! Are you going to wear a pretty bow in your hair?"

"You know _some _girlfriends would be _supportive _about this!" Freddie said bitterly.

"Yeah, some would," Sam said, giving him a quick kiss. "So seriously, when do I get to see you dance?"

"Never," Freddie said firmly. "I may have to take these stupid dance lessons, but that doesn't mean anybody has to _see _me dance."

"Oh come on," Sam said. "Don't be a baby. You really think it'll be so bad if I see you dance?"

"Absolutely!"

"What if I promise to only laugh a little?"

"No!"

"Ugh, you're so frustrating!"

"Welcome to my life!"

"Maybe it _is_ time to start locking that door," Carly whispered to Spencer as they watched the couple continue to fight.

…..

"Unbelievable!" Freddie's dance teacher at the community center yelled angrily a few days later as Freddie fell once again onto the gymnasium floor. "I have been in the dance instructing business for thirty years and I have _never _met someone as uncoordinated as you!"

"Well maybe if I could try dancing somewhere without such slippery floors-" Freddie began, wincing as he got back onto his feet.

"No, no, don't you _dare _blame the floors for your inadequacies!" the dance teacher snapped. "Oh, I knew I should've never left Broadway to come back to this nothing town, but mother just _had _to get sick and drag me back here to take care of her!"

And with that the teacher turned on his heel and stormed out of the gymnasium, still fuming under his breath.

Freddie sighed. He knew he wouldn't be any good at dancing. He hoped his mom was pleased about the amount of humiliation she was currently heaping on her son.

"Wow," a voice suddenly said behind him. "That was…something."

Freddie spun around and saw Sam standing at the gymnasium entrance, a smug expression on her face.

"What-What are you doing here?" Freddie frowned. "How'd you figure out this is where my dance lessons were?"

"It really wasn't all too hard, baby," Sam said, walking towards him. "You know Mama has her ways."

"So what, you're here to make fun of me?" Freddie sighed. "I know I have no dancing skills."

Sam gave him a small smile and held out her hands for him. "Here."

"What are you doing?" Freddie asked curiously, taking his girlfriend's hands.

"Helping your clumsy butt learn how to dance," Sam replied. "Don't look at your feet when you move, for starters."

"But then I'll just trip over them," Freddie said.

"No you wont, trust me," Sam said. "Just relax."

"But what if-" Freddie began, but Sam cut him off with a short kiss.

"Come on," she said. "Just try it."

"I-Okay," Freddie conceded, unable to argue with her after that.

Freddie slowly began moving his feet, willing himself not to look down. Instead he simply focused on Sam.

"Hey!" he said after a few moments. "I'm not tripping! I'm actually doing pretty good!"

"Well let's not get carried away," Sam said. "But yeah…you don't look like a bear doing the hula anymore, so that's something. Oh, and don't hold your arms like that, it's throwing off your balance. And don't slouch!"

"Man, you know a lot about dance," Freddie commented.

"Hey, I _did _use to dance you know," Sam reminded him. "It was the only part of pageants I liked."

"You know, I never asked," Freddie said. "Why'd you stop?"

"I dunno," Sam shrugged. "I guess-I guess I just figured I couldn't be _tough _and a pretty little dancer…I was worried about my rep."

"You ever miss it?" Freddie asked.

"Sometimes I guess," Sam shrugged. "But you're never allowed to repeat that, got it?"

"I won't," Freddie chuckled. "But if you miss it…maybe you should start it up again."

"Nah, it's too late for that," Sam said.

"No it's not," Freddie said, extending his hand to her. "Sam Puckett…will you have this dance with me?"

Sam face broke out into a wide grin. "You sound like some dude straight out of a chick flick right now." But she took his hand anyway.

"I'll apologize now for all the times I'll be stepping on your feet," Freddie said as the couple began to move.

"I'll live," Sam smiled.


	408. Chapter 408

_Irritation_

"So see, then I figured out if I just adjusted the white balance and recalibrated the microphone system, the problem would be solved," Freddie said proudly as the trio sat at their usual table in the Groovy Smoothie.

"Wow, um, good job," Carly said politely, pulling on a smile even though she had been hopelessly bored throughout the entire tale.

"Yeah, your nubby tech skills really saved the day, didn't they?" Sam smirked, her voice dripping in sarcasm. "What would the AV club have done without an adjusted white balance?"

"You know, keep up the snide remarks about the white balance and I _may _conveniently forget to adjust for _you _during iCarly," Freddie snapped. "We'll see who's laughing with magenta skin!"

"Big threats coming from an AV doof," Sam said.

"Hey! The AV club is the sixth largest club at Ridgeway High School!" Freddie defended.

"I swear, it's like we're back in the eight grade," Carly sighed, massaging her temples. "In case you two have forgotten, we're _seniors_ now. Must you still argue like children? I mean come on! You two even _dated_."

"Ugh, don't bring that up," Sam moaned. "I'm still not fully recovered."

"Yeah, I was close to blocking that out, Carls," Freddie cringed.

"Unbelievable," Carly sighed, sipping the last of her smoothie. "I've never seen two people who have been friends for most of their lives act like such-such _hooligans_."

"Hey, there's only one hooligan at this table," Freddie said. "And she's sucking down her fourth smoothie. You know, Sam, you still owe me ten bucks from the pizza we all ordered last night. How can you afford to buy so many smoothies when you claimed you had no money?"

"I can't afford them," Sam said simply. She pulled Freddie's wallet out of her pocket and tossed it to him. "You, on the other hand…"

"You stole my wallet?" Freddie exclaimed indignantly.

"Just be happy she actually gave it back this time," Carly said.

"She stole fifty bucks!"

"Tough," Sam said, standing up and finishing her last smoothie. "Now come on, there's an MMA fight starting in ten minutes that I'm not about to miss."

"You can't just steal people's wallets, Sam," Freddie fumed as the teens walked out of the Groovy Smoothie. "I can file charges!"

"No you can't," Sam said, walking down the sidewalk. "Now move it! If I miss this fight because of you, Fredgrab…"

"If you're so worried about missing the fight, just call Spencer and ask him to record the start of it for you," Carly suggested.

"Nah, it's just not the same," Sam said, looking back at her best friend as she approached an intersection. "You don't get the same suspense that you do watching it live. It's like you're-"

"Sam!" Freddie suddenly shouting, rushing over to her and pulling her back just as she was about to cross into the intersection.

"What are you-" Sam began, but then she saw a large ice cream truck speed past, narrowly avoiding hitting her. Had Freddie not pulled her back, it would've…

Freddie, who had sped to catch up to Sam right before he grabbed her, lost his balance just as he pulled Sam back onto the sidewalk, causing him to fall, hard, into the street.

Thankfully, the ice cream truck had just passed, and Freddie wasn't hit. Still, though, he hit the street with much force.

"Freddie!" Carly and Sam yelled out as they ran over to him.

"Are you okay?" Carly gasped, kneeling down next to him.

"Ow!" Freddie winced, massaging his shoulder. He had ripped the sleeve of his shirt and the girls could see that he had a pretty serious wound.

"Dude! You could've gotten hit!" Sam cried. "What were you _thinking_?"

"We need to get you cleaned up," Carly said as her and Sam helped Freddie to his feet. "That cut on your shoulder looks real bad…Oh! And you hit your head too! Maybe we should take you to the emergency room-"

"No," Freddie said quickly, still cringing in pain as he limped back onto the sidewalk. "No, that will just worry my mom. I don't think anything broke…I'll just get her first aid kit and take care of it."

"Are you sure?" Carly asked, concerned.

"Yeah," Freddie said, trying not to look at the blood running down his arm.

"Okay, well, let's get you back home then," Carly said, helping Freddie start walking. "You need to sit down."

Sam said nothing as she followed behind the two. She couldn't believe it…

Freddie Benson had just saved her life.

…..

"Don't use that stuff!"

"Freddie, I have to!" Carly said. "Do you want to get an infection?"

"But that stuff stings," Freddie moaned.

"You are eighteen years old," Carly said, rolling her eyes as she held up a bottle of antibacterial spray. "You're telling me you can't handle some boo-boo spray?"

"No one likes that stuff!" Freddie argued.

Carly sighed and turned to Sam, who was sitting silently at the Shay's kitchen table, watching the scene.

"Sam, can you help me out here?" Carly asked.

"Um…okay," Sam said, walking over to the two. She took a deep breath and tried to tell herself that the weird feeling that was taking over the pit of her stomach was from the shock of almost getting run over, not from the fact that Freddie had been sitting in the kitchen shirtless for the past half-hour while Carly tended to his injuries.

"Tell me about that dumb white balance thing again," Sam said to Freddie.

"What?" Freddie frowned.

"Come on, you're always so willing to talk about it," Sam said. "So talk."

"Well, um, it's a pretty important feature on most cameras that makes sure that things show up the right color in pictures and videos," Freddie began, still giving Sam a weird look. "See, it takes into account light temperature and-ow!"

While he had been distracted talking to Sam, Carly took the opportunity to spray the boo-boo spray all over Freddie's arm.

"See, not that bad," Carly said, satisfied.

"Um, _very _bad!" Freddie cried.

"I'm going to grab some more bandages from the bathroom," Carly said, ignoring Carly's comment. "And then I think it might be a good idea for us to try and figure out a way for us to cover up that bump on your head before your mom sees and flips out."

"Good idea," Freddie said as Carly headed out of the kitchen, leaving Sam and him alone.

"So," Freddie said, clearing his throat. "I-I guess you wound up missing your fight…"

"Whatever, I bet it wasn't even that good," Sam mumbled.

"But you said-"

"Hey, so, um," Sam said awkwardly. "Thanks…I guess. For, you know, saving me."

"Oh, no-no problem," Freddie said.

Sam looked up at him. "Why'd you do it though?"

Freddie gave her a confused look. "What do you mean?"

"Why'd you save me?" Sam asked. "Look at you, you got hurt pretty bad."

"Well what was I supposed to do?" Freddie frowned. "Just _let _you get hit by that ice cream truck?"

Sam shrugged. "I just never thought you'd rush to save _me _like that. Carly was one thing…"

"Why's me saving Carly three years ago so different from me saving you now?" Freddie asked.

"Well, you know…because it's _me_," Sam said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "We're Sam and Freddie. We annoy each other and throw insults. We don't save each other!"

"Would you have let the ice cream truck hit me?" Freddie questioned.

Sam rolled her eyes. "Well no, I _guess _not, but-"

"Hey, you and I both know that no matter how much we annoy each other, we're still friends," Freddie said, giving her his signature smirk. "At then end of the day…I'd save you from _any _ice cream truck that was about to run you over."

Sam gave him a small smile. "Right back at you, nub."

She picked up the boo-boo spray Carly had left on the counter and sprayed it on Freddie's wound.

"Ow!" Freddie yelled.

"Hmm, I like this stuff," Sam said, looking down at the bottle approvingly. "I'll have to hang onto it…"

…..

Two weeks had passed since Freddie had saved Sam. Most of his injuries had heeled, though not before his mom noticed them. Freddie told her that he had fell coming back from the puzzle shop, but that didn't stop her from ordering him to bed rest for three whole days.

"I like this movie, it has everything," Carly said one afternoon as the three teens sat on the Shay's couch. "Hot guys, funny jokes, hot guys…"

"Yeah, everything you could ever want in a movie," Freddie said less-than-enthusiastically. "Can't we watch something else?"

"Seriously, hot guys can only do so much for this lame movie," Sam said. She got to her feet. "I need food. You want anything, Carls?"

"No, I'm good," Carly replied, not taking her eyes off the television.

Sam shook her head and was about to head into the kitchen when suddenly she turned back around.

"Um, do-do you want anything, Freddie?"

"Huh?" Freddie said, caught off guard. Sam never offered to get him anything.

"Do you want anything?" she repeated.

"Oh, um, a soda would be nice," Freddie said.

"Okay, well…I'll get you one," Sam said lamely.  
She headed to the kitchen, mentally kicking herself for her behavior.

Ever since Freddie had saved her life, she couldn't help herself from being…nice to the boy. She knew what was going on, though. It was the same thing that happened with Carly and Freddie; the hero complex. She liked what Freddie did for her, she didn't like Freddie himself. Not _that _way at least. Still though, she was ready for the phase to pass. The butterflies in her stomach and sweaty palms were beginning to irritate her.

"I wonder if there's a sequel for this movie," Carly said, coming into the kitchen with Sam.

"I thought you were watching," Sam said, grabbing a soda from the fridge.

"DVD player broke," Carly replied, nodding back over to the living room, where Freddie was busily toying around with the device.

"Ah," Sam said. She grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl and bit into it. "Hey, um, Carly?"

"What's up?" Carly asked.

"You remember when Freddie saved you from the taco truck?"

"Sure," Carly nodded. "Why?"

"Well, um, how long did you have that hero thing going?" Sam questioned. "You know, where you thought you loved Freddie because he saved you, but you actually loved what he did for you?"

"Oh, I dunno, maybe a week?" Carly said. "Wow…I haven't thought about that in awhile."

"Okay, a week," Sam said softly, more to herself. More than a week had already passed, but maybe she was just slower with this than Carly was.

"Yeah, thinking back, though, I guess I should've realized I didn't actually like Freddie," Carly said. "I mean how awkward was that?"

"Yeah, real awkward," Sam mumbled.

"Besides, we didn't have that romantic connection that I've gotten with other guys," Carly said. "Like Griffin…even if that was short lived."

"What are you talking about?" Sam frowned.

"I was just so goo-goo eyed that he saved me that I didn't realize what was missing," Carly explained. "I didn't get those butterflies in my stomach, I didn't feel my heart race, and when we kissed…nothing."

"Well maybe you _did _feel those things but you just forgot about them!" Sam said, almost defensively.

"No…I don't think so," Carly replied, giving her a weird look. "Um, are you okay, Sam? You look sort of-"

"Well, I can't fix this," Freddie announced, joining the girls in the kitchen. "Real shame."

"You probably barely tried," Carly said, giving him a knowing look.

"I turned it off and on again," Freddie said. "That's all I've got."

"Says the guy who took apart an entire computer and put it back together just for fun," Carly said. Just then, her phone buzzed.

"Who texted?" Sam asked.

"Spencer," Carly sighed. "He locked his car keys in his car again…I've got to go run his spare set over."

"Isn't this the third time he's done that this month?" Freddie asked.

"Your point? It's Spencer," Carly said. She grabbed her jacket from the coat rack and hurried out the front door.

Sam looked down at her feet. She really didn't want to be alone with Freddie right now…

"You have any other DVDs you wanna watch?" Freddie asked her.

"I thought you said you couldn't fix the DVD player," Sam said.

"I may have just said that to get out of watching another second of that _horrible _movie," Freddie said, his eyes twinkling.

Sam laughed. "Yeah, I guess we could-" Suddenly she caught herself. Watching a movie with Freddie right now probably wouldn't be a smart move. Who knew what she would wind up doing now that Carly had left.

"Um, actually, I don't feel like a movie right now," Sam said.

"Okay," Freddie shrugged. "Well, do you want to-"

"I think I'm just gonna go home," Sam said quickly, grabbing her bag. "I forgot to feed Frothy…"

"Sam," Freddie said as she started towards the door. "Sam…are you okay?"

"What?" Sam said, trying to laugh his comment off. "Duh, of course I'm okay. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Look, I think I know what this is about," Freddie said.

"What _what's _about?" Sam said, crossing her arms.

"Ever since the whole incident with the ice cream truck, you've been, well, nicer to me," Freddie said. "You've barely insulted me, you haven't hit me, and you've _actually_ paid me back all the money you owed me."

"So?" Sam snapped.

"So," Freddie said calmly. "I remember the last time you suddenly became all nice to me."

Sam played with the hem of her shirt nervously. Was he talking about the lock-in?

"Get over yourself," she said with as much conviction as she could muster. "It's not like that this time…Look," she sighed. "You should remember how this chiz goes down from the last time. You saved my life, clearly hanging around with Carly has made her hero fascination rub off a little on me, so anything that I may or may not be feeling towards you right now is just because I sort of liked how you didn't let me get flattened by that ice cream truck. They're not _real _feelings so don't start thinking I've lost my mind again, got it, Benson? Because I _haven't_."

Freddie blinked as Sam finished her ran. The two were silent for a moment.

"Well then," Freddie finally said. "I-Okay."

"Okay," Sam echoed. She turned back to the door. "Now I'm outta here for real. Tell Carly-"

"So I guess if you haven't lost your mind this time," Freddie cut her off. "I guess that means…I have."

Sam spun back around. "What?"

"Look, you-you aren't the only one who has been dealing with weird feelings since the ice cream truck thing," Freddie said slowly.

"What are you talking about?" Sam asked, though her voice was softer this time.

"Sam, when I pulled you back from the truck," Freddie sighed. "I-I realized how close I was to losing you. For good. And that scared me, not just because I was about to lose one of my best friends, but because I would've never gotten a chance to-to…I guess what I'm trying to say is that I realized how much you mean to me, and that if anything happened to you…I would've been devastated. I-I didn't feel this way after I saved Carly. I'm glad I saved her, but…it wasn't the same."

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Alright, listen nub. I'm not good at reading into big speeches. What are you saying? Because all your stupid words just confused the chiz out of me and-"

She was interrupted as Freddie pressed his lips onto hers, kissing her for the first time in over a year. She quickly responded to the kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck.

The two stayed that way for several moments until both of them finally broke apart to catch their breath.

"Did you understand _that_?" Freddie asked.

Sam smirked. "I think I got the message."


	409. Chapter 409

**AN-Hey everyone, this request is actually an alternative ending to iStart a Fan War. Hope you enjoy!**

…

_Security_

"Well that was fun," Carly said bitterly as her, Freddie and Sam were ushered out of the intense fan war that they had unintentionally started.

"If only someone had suggested we _didn't _go to this nut convention," Sam said. "Oh, wait…"

"Not the time, Sam," Carly sighed bitterly. "My love life is _ruined_! All because Adam thinks I'm actually _into _Freddie! Could this day get any worse?"

"Well it looks like your brother's over there in some weird War or Warlords fight," Freddie said.

"Ugh!" Carly moaned. "We are _never _coming back to Webicon. It's just been-"

"Hey, Carly?" a voice behind the teens suddenly said. The three turned around to see none other than Adam himself jogging over to them.

"Adam!" Carly said excitedly. "What-What are you doing here? I thought you left! I mean, not that I'm not thrilled to see you. I am! It's just-"

"I-I wanted to talk to you," Adam said. "And set the record straight once and for all. Are you or are you not in love with Freddie like half of those crazy fans were saying?"

"No!" Carly said right away. "No, not at _all_, not even a little. It's _Freddie_, Adam. Me being in love with him like everyone was saying in there is about as likely as-as as one of those War of Warlords nerds over there having an actual job!"

"Um, isn't that one in the blue your brother?" Adam frowned.

"Yes, but he just stays in our apartment and sculpts things out of butter wearing his pajamas all day," Carly said quickly. "But trust me, there's no way I'm in love with Freddie."

Freddie raised an eyebrow, but said nothing.

"Oh," Adam said. "Well, um, good. I was getting worried there. I thought I had missed my shot."

"Oh no," Carly said, flipping her hair flirtatiously, causing Sam to roll her eyes. "You didn't miss _any _shot. Hey, now that we're finally away from all those annoying Creddie fans, how about you and I go look around here for a little bit. You know, just the two of us. You did drive all the way here, after all."

"I think I'd like that," Adam smiled. "You know they have these Fat Shake things here…"

"Unbelievable!" Sam exclaimed as she watched Adam and Carly walk off, not giving her or Freddie another glance. "She just _ditched _us! _And _she's going to get Fat Shakes and didn't even offer to buy me one!"

"Yeah, well," Freddie sighed, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall. "What can you do?

"And now," Sam continued. "We're going to be stuck here for the rest of the day because she's our ride home! There's not even anything entertaining to do at this nerd festival!"

She angrily kicked a nearby potted plant and slid down against the wall and onto the floor. She looked up at Freddie, who seemed to be in his own world.

"What's up with _you_?" Sam asked. "Mad because they sold out of _Galaxy Wars _pocket protectors?"

"No," Freddie retorted.

"Well then stop moping and help me figure out a way to keep me from dying of boredom until Carly finishes drooling over Adam," Sam snapped. "Jeez…Carly gets to hang around some hot guy and I wind up with you. Yeah, _that's _fair."

"Yes, we _all _know I'm _nothing_ compared to Adam, alright?" Freddie said defensively. "Must _you _rub it in too?"

"What are you talking about?" Sam asked.

"Nothing," Freddie mumbled, looking down at his feet. "Forget it."  
"No, no," Sam said, stepping closer to him. "This actually sounds mildly interesting. And since it concerns _you_, you know I'm _real _desperate entertainment."

Freddie rolled his eyes. "Thanks."

"Seriously, dude, why so pouty?" Sam asked. "I thought a dork like you would be more than willing to spend time in a place like this."

"Just drop it, okay?" Freddie said.

"Wait a minute…" Sam said slowly. "I know what this is about…You're mad that your precious Carly is running off with some guy who's not you."  
Freddie didn't respond.

"Well, I take back what I said about this being _interesting_," Sam said, shaking her head. "This is the same chiz that's been happening since the sixth grade. When will you get it through your head? Just because you're in love with Carly-"

"I'm not mad because Carly's with Adam right now," Freddie cut her off. "And I'm not in love with her…anymore."  
Sam scoffed in disbelief.

"But that doesn't mean hearing her so…_opposed _to the _idea _of us together made me feel all tingly inside," Freddie said heavily, shoving his hands in his pockets. "I mean, I get that she doesn't like me _that _way. And you know what? I'm fine with that...now. But did she really have to say there'd be _no possible way_ she'd even consider dating me? Am I _that _unattractive?"

Sam opened her mouth, her mind bursting of possible insults to throw back at that comment. But then she noticed Freddie's face. He looked genuinely upset about this. She sighed. She may enjoy causing people pain, but she did avoid kicking people when they were down.  
Even when it came to Freddie.

"Well…come on," Sam said, trying her best to sound somewhat supportive. "She didn't _actually _mean that. She was just trying to make sure Adam knew that she was free so that _he _would ask her out."

"She sounded pretty serious," Freddie pointed out. "I guess it's no shock though…Girls have never actually acted as though I _was _attractive. Well, other than ones with unhealthy obsessions with magic tricks and ones trying to start rival web shows."

"Don't forget Nora," Sam added. "And Mandy."

"Great," Freddie sighed. "I'll add psychos to the list."

"Dude," Sam said. "Aren't you forgetting that Carly _did _go out with you?"

"That doesn't count," Freddie replied. "She was just in love with the fact that I saved her life."

"Oh…" Sam nodded. "Right. Well, um…okay. So Carly doesn't want to date you at _all, _big deal! You know the kind of guys Carly goes for! Stupid ones with weird hair and Pee-Wee baby obsessions."

"She goes for popular guys that all girls like," Freddie said. "And I guess she considers me _far _from that category."

"Well I've been telling you that for years," Sam said, trying to ease his mood.

"I guess you were right then," Freddie said miserably. "I'm just an unattractive nerd that no girl would ever want to date."

Sam sighed. "Hey," she said. "How do you think _I _feel?"

Freddie gave her a strange look. "You?"

"Sure," Sam shrugged. "Carly may go for the super jocky, popular guys who are _morons_ but insanely hot…but at least they go for her back. I mean, when Adam first transferred to our school last month…_I _sort of thought he was a good looking hunk of boy."

"You did?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah," Sam admitted. "But before I even got to say two words to him, he spotted Carly. And, well, I guess now the rest is history. Just know that you're not the only one who knows what it feels to be completely over looked."

Freddie gave her a small smile. "Wow, Sam. That was actually…_not _mean of you."

"I'm still in a real good mood from that Fat Shake," Sam said, punching him lightly in the arm.

Freddie chuckled.

The two were silent for a moment, until Freddie finally spoke again.

"You know what? This is stupid," he said. "So Carly said I'm not her type. Like I said, I'm over her."

"Are you really?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, I am," Freddie said honestly. "Despite what those Creddie fans seem to think in there. But you know what else? _Carly_ isn't my type either."

"Really?" Sam said. "Because I sort of remember you describing her as your perfect woman back in the eight grade."

"Please, I also though Nug Nug could take the Blue Sky Nauts in a Proton Cruiser battle," Freddie scoffed. "I was young. I didn't know anything. Carly will always be one of my best friends, but she's just a little too…prissy for me. She worried about whether her outfit is perfect or if her make-up looks just right…stuff that just doesn't really matter to me. She's not really good at just going with the flow."

"Neither are you," Sam laughed. "You have schedules for every second of your day!"

"I know," Freddie agreed. "So why would I want someone who's just like me? I get on my own nerves sometimes. I couldn't deal with two."

"Yeah," Sam grinned. "That is a lot of nubbiness to deal with."

"I guess I sort of want someone who's…different," Freddie continued. "Who knows how to have fun and be spontaneous. Someone like-"

"Hey, look!" a loud voice suddenly shouted, causing Sam and Freddie to spin around. There was a crowd of about twenty Seddie shippers standing behind them. "Sam and Freddie are together! All by themselves."

"Aw jeez," Sam moaned. "This place has _got _to get better security."

"Look at how close Sam's shoulder is to Freddie's shoulder!" another voice exclaimed. "They're practically making out!"

"And look! Freddie's _clearly _staring at the tiny freckle above Sam's ear!" another voice yelled.

"And Sam's hand is less than three feet away from Freddie's!"

"We've got to get out of here," Freddie sighed.

"How?" Sam asked as the fans began to get closer. "We're surrounded!"

"Well," Freddie said. "There's only one thing left to do then."

"What?"

"Run!"


	410. Chapter 410

**AN-I know I already did a sort of sequel to iStage an Intervention, after Freddie makes Sam think Garry Wolf texted her, but this one is set WAY in the future. Enjoy!**

…

_Genius_

"Alright, I packed up your towels and bed sheets in this box," Carly said, closing up a large cardboard box. "DVDs and excessively violent video games are in here…I have some of your shoes in this box and the rest in another one down in the storage unit and your winter clothes are-Sam!"

"Huh? What?" Sam said quickly as her and Freddie pulled apart from each other.

"Are you _really _going to make me pack up all your stuff for you while you just sit here making out with your fiancé?" Carly exclaimed.

"Um…would you mind?" Sam asked.

"Ugh, you two are unbelievable," Carly said, shaking her head. "Good thing you're getting married in three weeks."

"Two weeks and five days, actually," Freddie corrected her, planting a small kiss on the tip of Sam's nose. "I've been counting down the days."

"Wow, that was so mushy I think _I _even vomited," Carly said. "Seriously, you guys, not that I don't _love _watching your public displays of affection, but we need to get the rest of Sam's stuff packed up so you'll be all set to move into your fancy new house after the wedding."

"Wow, was sharing an apartment with me for four years really that bad?" Sam smirked. "You're that eager to get rid of me?"

"Hey, you know I'll practically be living at your new place," Carly smiled. She sat down next to another box. "Here, just help me go through this box of your old stuff from the storage space downstairs and I'll let you two resume your little activities."

"Fine," Sam moaned as her and Freddie got off the couch to join Carly on the floor. "What is all this stuff anyway? I don't remember any of it."

"Looks like stuff from high school," Freddie said, holding up an old Biology book with a suspicious orange stain on the cover.

"Oh yeah," Carly said, pulling out a notebook and flipping through it. "Here are all your drawings of Ms. Briggs getting attacked by hyenas."

"Oh! Give me those!" Sam said, grabbing the notebook.

"You're going to keep those?" Freddie asked.

"Shoosh yeah!" Sam nodded. "That's four years of serious doodles! You know how I hard I worked to make sure I didn't get caught?"

"I'm sure you're very proud," Freddie chuckled.

"Whoa! No way!" Carly gasped, pulling out a thick hard-covered book. "This is one of our old yearbooks!"

"Really?" Sam said. "I forgot I actually bought that. Or did I just steal it from some nub…?"

"That nub would be _me_," Freddie said, pointing to his name, which was written in gold stenciling at the bottom of the book.

"Oh…" Sam said lamely. "Well, good thing we're getting married and all of your stuff becomes _our _stuff, so no harm done!"

"Yeah, yeah," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"This is from the ninth grade," Carly said, opening up the book and turning the pages. "Wow, look how young everyone looked. Here's Wendy, back before she got those highlights. Here's that stupid French girl _after _she got that terrible nose job…Oh! And here's Gibby! Well, actually, Gibby still looks pretty…Gibby in this picture. Oh, and _gross. _Here's that stupid Gary Wolf kid."

"Aw man, he looks stupider in this picture than he did in person," Sam said.

"Hold on," Freddie said, looking at the picture. "Gary Wolf…wasn't he one of those really popular guys that had girls flocking around him all the time?"

"Yup," Carly said darkly. "What's your point?"

"Well, while I'm pleased to see your hatred for him," Freddie said. "Didn't you two used to be all _in love_ with him?"

"Oh, I'm sorry," Sam said coldly. "Would you like me to start gushing over him?"

"No," Freddie said quickly.

"Besides," Carly said. "He may have been hot, but that guy was a straight-up jerk!"

"Pfft, don't have to remind _me_," Sam mumbled.

"Wait…what'd he do?" Freddie asked eagerly. "Did he steal candy from a child? Did he attack the elderly? I _knew _Mr. Pretty Boy wasn't all that he was talked up to be!"

"Don't you remember?" Carly said. "It was back in the ninth grade. Gary _Scumbag_ Wolf texted Sam telling her that he wanted to hang out with her at the mall. You know, like, just the two of them? And do you know what happened? He totally stood her up!"

"Well look who's laughing now," Sam smirked. "Last I heard, Gary's now working as a janitor at Ridgeway and lost half his teeth and hair, while _I'm _sitting here, still totally hot."

"I'll say," Freddie grinned.

"I still can't believe that jerk had the nerve to act like he didn't even remember texting you about that either," Carly said, shaking her head. "The nerve!"

"Seriously!" Sam agreed.

"Um, well…actually," Freddie said slowly. "He-He may not have been acting about that."

"Huh?" Carly frowned.

"What do you mean?" Sam asked.

"Well," Freddie chuckled. "See, right before you got that text from Ruben telling you to meet him at the mall…do you remember that prank you pulled on me? You made me believe that I got _Consuela's Revenge_ for not forwarding that chain email? You took apart my bike, you put a red sock in my washing machine, you shorted out my laptop…"

"Oh yeah," Sam grinned. "Some of my best work, if I do say so myself."

"Actually, I managed to figure out it was you all along," Freddie said proudly. "And I decided to get even with you."

"What? You never got even with me," Sam scoffed.

"Yes I did," Freddie grinned. "Gary never sent you that text, Sam."

"What are you talking about?" Sam said, confused. "It came from his phone number."

"It showed up that way because I hacked his phone," Freddie explained. "But I sent that text message so that you would go down to the mall and wait for him like some nub!"

Carly and Sam exchanged looks.

"Wait…_you're _the reason Sam thought she got stood up at the mall?" Carly frowned.

"Pretty impressive for a tech doof, right?" Freddie grinned.

Sam got to her feet and then, without saying anything, went into her bedroom, slamming the door behind her.

"Um…did I miss something?" Freddie asked slowly. "Why's she upset? Is she okay?"

"No she is not okay!" Carly snapped. "She just found out she's two weeks and five days away from marrying a total-total jerk-face!"

"Jerk face?" Freddie repeated.

"Yes! That's you, genius!"

"What did I do?"

"What did you do? You cannot be seriously asking that," Carly said. "I can't believe you would send her that fake text message from Gary!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Freddie said. "That was, like, ten years ago! Am I really being punished for something that happened _ten years ago_?"

"Well it's not like you ever came clean about it," Carly said, crossing her arms. "Besides, ten years ago or not, it was still _mean_."

"Mean?" Freddie laughed. "Are we forgetting all the things Sam has done to me over the years? She's put hot sauce in my boxers, dyed my hair pink, replaced my Galaxy Wars DVDs with salami-"

"Okay," Carly sighed. "So Sam's hasn't exactly been an angel to you in the past…But that whole Gary thing really hurt her. And not in the same way hot sauce in your boxers can hurt. Although I imagine that can't be too pleasant…"

"What do you mean?" Freddie asked.

"You remember how Sam used to be with guys," Carly said. "Right?"

"I've tried to push every guy Sam was with before me out of my memory," Freddie said.

Carly rolled her eyes. "Well, back in the ninth grade, and most of high school, actually, she was always really nervous around them. She'd never want to ask them out or talk to them or anything because she was afraid they would reject her because she wasn't exactly the girliest girl in school. And so when she thought Gary stood her up, she thought it was because she wasn't good enough for a guy like him."

"Why would she think she wasn't good enough just because she _thought _one guy stood her up?" Freddie asked. "Sam's amazing! She's beautiful and funny and talented-"

"Well you and I know that's true," Carly said. "But no girl thinks that about herself after something like that. It took Sam forever to realize that she's so much better than what she used to give herself credit for…You know, she plays it tough, but self-esteem really isn't her strong suit."

Freddie sighed. "Well…now I really _do _feel like a jerk-face."

Carly patted him on the shoulder. "Hey, it's like you said, it _was_ a long time ago. But, um, if I were you, I'd get in there and see my fiancé's doing."

"Oh, right," Freddie nodded, quickly getting to his feet. He headed over to Sam's bedroom door, taking a deep breath before knocking and opening up the door.

Sam was sitting on her bed, hitting a bull's-eye she had right above her dresser with rubber bands from a homemade slingshot

"Hey," Freddie said.

Sam looked over at him. "What?"

Freddie sat down next to her. "You haven't used that slingshot in years," he commented.

Sam didn't reply as she fired the device yet again, sending another can sailing from her dresser.

"Look, Sam," Freddie said heavily. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize," Sam mumbled, setting the slingshot down. "It was a million years ago…and it was stupid. You were just getting me back."

"I-I didn't know how much it would hurt you," Freddie said honestly. "Really, I-I just wanted to get even about that whole Consuela's Revenge thing. I was just some dumb fourteen-year old kid who didn't even stop to think about what I was doing."

"Whatever, like I said, it's done now," Sam said.

"Baby, it obviously still bothers you if you got this upset-"

"I'm not upset!" Sam snapped, jumping to her feet and walking across the room to the window. She stared out for a few moments.

Freddie slowly got up and stood behind her, not saying a word.

"It's not like I should've expected Gary Wolf, one of the most popular guys at school back then, to like me anyway," Sam mumbled. "I wasn't exactly a guy's dream girl then…or now even."

"Well that's definitely not true," Freddie said at once. "Because I haven't been able to _stop _dreaming about you for years now."

He could see Sam's cheeks visibly redden, but she said nothing.

"Even back then, I don't think you realize how amazing you were," Freddie said, gently wrapping his arms around her waist. "Sure, you were loud and violent, but you definitely caught a lot of guys attention."

"You're just saying that because you're trying to make me feel better," Sam said.

"No," Freddie said. "A lot of guys liked you."

"They liked Carly."

"No, they liked _you_," Freddie told her. "You remember Paul Kensington?"

"Who?" Sam frowned.

"The kid in the AV club who used to always wear two different socks to school," Freddie replied.

"Oh…yeah. So?"

"Well, he liked you a _lot_," Freddie said. "He used to always ask me to set you two up. But then I saw him eating a low fat Fat Cake and knew you wouldn't be able to deal with him."  
Sam gave a small smile. "He really liked me?"

Freddie nodded. "And then there was William Turner, that guy on the baseball team. He was in my biology class in the tenth grade and I used to see him doodling your name in his notebook."

"Really?"

"Uh-huh."

Sam looked down at her feet. "You know I wouldn't have dated either of those guys…they weren't my type."

"I'm glad," Freddie chuckled playfully. He leaned down and gave her a soft kiss on her lips. "I'm really sorry for what I did back then. I didn't mean for you to get hurt. Please know that, Sam. And I don't want you to ever feel like you were every anything less than perfect, even back then. Gary Wolf was a moron for passing up someone as beautiful and amazing as you. But I'm so glad he did. Because now I have you in my life, about to marry me, and I couldn't be happier."

"I wouldn't have _married _Garry," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "There's only one guy who I'd ever wear a fancy white dress for all day, and it's you."

"And I'm the luckiest guy around because of that," Freddie said, kissing her again. "I love you so much, Sam."

"I love you too," Sam whispered back.


	411. Chapter 411

**AN-This takes place after #KillerTunaJump**, **I know there's a bunch of these out there, but I couldn't help it! Besides, I've been getting a few requests, so here it is. Speaking of requests, I'm still taking them! I'm actually almost caught up, so if you have any new ones, please don't hesitate to send them to me!**

…

_Nickname_

Sam let out an audible groan as she stared at her closet, which she had been standing in front of for the last half-hour.

"I can't believe I have nothing to wear!" Sam moaned.

"What are you talking about?" Cat asked, looking up from her laptop on her side of the room. "You have tons of clothes!"

"Yeah, but nothing that seems right for me to wear tonight," Sam pointed out.

"What's tonight?" Cat asked.

"I _told _you," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Freddie gets out of the hospital tonight."

"Oh…I don't get it," Cat said.

"Come on, you know him and I agreed to hang out when he got released," Sam told her.

"Well haven't you hung out a million times before back in Seattle?" Cat shrugged. "Can't you just wear what you would wear back then?"

"Ugh, this is _different_!" Sam explained. "This isn't just a 'hang out'. It's a _hang out_."

"I still don't get it," Cat said. "Wait, sometimes my brother liked to _hang out_ with the voices in his head…is that the same thing?"

"No!" Sam said, frustrated. "We're going to hang out, but, well, we-we may be hanging out as _more _than friends. You get what I'm saying?"

"But I thought you and Freddie weren't boyfriend and girlfriend anymore," Cat frowned.

"Yeah, we broke up," Sam sighed. "But…I dunno, we've been texting a lot while he's been in the hospital, and he _did _come all the way down and-and I don't know, okay! That's why tonight's so important! I'll figure out what the heck is going on and get the nub to pay for dinner at the same time."

"Well why can't you just _ask _Freddie if it's a date?" Cat asked innocently. "That way you'll know."  
Sam laughed. "Yeah, sure. Like I can just ask Fredifer if we're going out on a date. Real funny, Cat."

"I don't think I told a joke…" Cat said slowly.

"Look, I can't just ask Freddie if we're going on a date," Sam said. "It's just-It's just not how we do stuff."

"Why not?" Cat asked.

"Because, we-we're not really _normal _friends," Sam admitted. "We have a system. I hit him, he acts like a nub, I steal his food…That's how its been for years."

"That's a weird system," Cat said.

"Nah, it works fine for Fredlump and me," Sam smiled.

"But…friends are supposed to be nice to each other," Cat pointed out. "Not hit each other."

"It's just how our relationship is," Sam shrugged. "Now help me figure out what I'm wearing for this date that's not a date but could be leading to date in the future, okay?"

"I can't, my head hurts now," Cat said, shaking her head as she got up and headed out of the room.

"Ugh! Thanks for nothing!" Sam yelled after her.

She fell back on her bed. Her and Freddie were supposed to be meeting in an hour, and at the rate she was going, she was going to have to go out in her pajamas.

Suddenly, Sam sat up.

"Carly!" she exclaimed, grabbing her laptop. Of course…why hadn't she thought of this earlier? This situation wasn't something Cat could help her out with. Sam loved the hopelessly stupid red head, but there were some things only a best friend could be trusted to handle.

Quickly pulling up a chat window, Sam turned on her webcam and waited for Carly's face to appear.

"Sam?"

"Hey Carls," Sam grinned as Carly's groggy face appeared on her screen.

"Sam, it's three in the morning here," Carly yawned, slowly sitting up. "Are you okay?"

"Oh, yeah, sorry kid, forgot Italy's in a different time zone," Sam said.

"It's okay, I don't have school tomorrow, I'll just sleep in," Carly said. "So what's going on?"

"I sort of need some help," Sam explained.

"Did you get arrested again?" Carly groaned.

"No, _mother_," Sam smirked. "It's-It's about a boy."

"Oh!" Carly gasped, suddenly wide-awake. "You met someone in L.A? What's he like? Is he cute? What's his name?"

"Um, well, you-you sort of know all the answers to those questions," Sam said. "The boy, um, is Freddie."

"Freddie?" Carly repeated in shock. "What? But-But he's not in L.A!"

"Er, yeah, he kind of is," Sam replied. "He's getting out of the hospital today and-"

"The hospital?" Carly repeated. "Is he okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, he's fine," Sam said dismissively. "Just some broken bones, a possible phobia of tuna…Anyway, him and I agreed to 'hang out' after he's released today and the thing is…"

"You don't know if he wants to hang out or 'hang out'," Carly nodded understandingly. "Gottcha."

"I mean…he _did _fly all the way down here when he thought I got hit by a Sports Utility Vehicle," Sam sighed.

"Um…I feel like there's some backstory I'm missing here," Carly frowned.

"-And he seemed kind of peeved off when I kissed Robbie," Sam continued, ignoring her friend.

"Robbie?"

"I just don't know what to do," Sam moaned.

"Look," Carly said comfortingly. "I get how confusing this all must be for you. You and Freddie never exactly had a _traditional _relationship."

"That's what I've been saying!" Sam said, relieved to finally be talking to someone who understood her and Freddie's past.

"Between your love-hate friendship and you guys actually dating…it's a lot to process," Carly continued. "Honestly, Sam, I think I'd be just as lost as you if I was in your position."

"Great, so what should I do?" Sam asked.

"Well, do you remember that lock-in last year?" Carly said. "Where you, you know, kissed Freddie out of the blue?"

"I mean, that's not something you can really forget," Sam mumbled.

"Well, that was one of the first times you actually _listened _to your emotions," Carly pointed out. "And look how that turned out!"

"I was locked in a mental hospital for three days, Carls," Sam reminded her, rolling her eyes.

"Okay, yes," Carly agreed. "But after…you and Freddie got together! Don't you see? Sometimes if you just listen to your heart-"

"Ugh, I think me not being around you all the time anymore has made you even more of a daffodil," Sam cringed.

"-If you listen to your heart, things _may _just work out for you," Carly finished.

Sam didn't reply.

"Sam, you want this to be more than a 'hang out', don't you?" Carly said softly.

Sam gave her a small nod. "A little bit."

"Well then, you know what you need to do," Carly said. "Now...do you know what you're going to wear yet?"

"Um, no, not really," Sam admitted.

"That's okay, we'll figure it out," Carly assured her. "When are you meeting Freddie?"

"In about forty-five minutes," Sam replied.

"Forty-five-Sam!" Carly gasped. "That's practically no time at all! Okay, let's not waste any more time. Move this laptop to your closet _now _so I can see what I'm working with."

"I've missed you, kid," Sam grinned.

….

Freddie parked his car in front of Sam's building, sighing as he turned off the engine. Well, this was it.

He had just been released from the hospital a few short hours ago, and though his jaw was still sore and he could faintly feel the sting of the bite marks from the tuna up and down his body, his physical injuries had very little to do with how nervous he was feeling right now.

All Sam had said to him that day in the hospital was that they should 'hang out'. But what exactly did 'hang out' mean for him and Sam? Back in Seattle, it would mean meeting up at the Shay's apartment to help Spencer out with his latest sculpture or listen to Carly drone on about her latest crush. Now it was just the two of them…

They had hung out alone before, of course. But then they began going out, and after they broke up, well, neither of them seemed too eager for one-on-one time.

But after thinking for almost twenty-four hours that Sam was hurt, and that he hadn't been there for him…he realized something. Something that had been floating around in his head since the night both Carly and Sam left Seattle.

He loved Sam Puckett.

But he could love her all he wanted to…that didn't mean she would feel the same way.

She _had _seemed upset when she thought he was into Cat, but that didn't necessarily mean she was in _love _with him (he had gotten hopeful when she had told Cat he was the only boy she ever loved, though apparently that was just an exaggeration).

And since there was no way he could _ask _Sam if this was a date or not (the very thought made him laugh), and since he was the always-ready Freddie Benson, he had decided to prepare for anything.

Whether this was a date, a hang out between old friends, or anything else, he was set for it. He was wearing one of his standard button down shirts, but if he saw Sam was dressed for a date, he had a dinner jacket in his back seat. He had flowers hidden back there as well, but also a bag of bacon to present Sam with in a 'friendly' manner. He had reservations at local sandwich place _and _an elegant restaurant.

There was no way he was going to mess this up.

"Alright, Benson," Freddie said to himself. "You can do this. You aren't going out with a stranger, you're going out with _Sam_. Sure, she's caused you an insurmountable amount of bruises, welts, wounds, and other various traumas, but she's still Sam. You're either going to hang out with her as a friend tonight, which is something you've been missing for months, or you'll hang out with her as _more _than friends, which is something you've missed even more."

And with that, Freddie got out of the car and slowly walked towards Sam's door. He took a deep breath before knocking, praying his legs wouldn't give out from underneath him.

A few seconds later, Cat opened the door. "Hi!" she said brightly.

"Hey Cat," Freddie said politely. "Is Sam here? Her and I are, um, we're getting lunch."

"Yeah, she's here," Cat nodded, letting him into the apartment.

"Cool," Freddie said. "So, um, what are you up to?"

"Nothing, just trying to figure out a way to boil water without any heat," Cat smiled happily.

"Isn't that a little…impossible?" Freddie frowned.

"Oh no, not if you use the right water," Cat replied.

"But it's still-you know what, never mind," Freddie said.

"Hey Cat, you know why there's a jar of green olives in the-oh…" Sam had just walked into the room and caught sight of Freddie. "You're here."

"Yeah, you know, I like to be on time," Freddie said. He looked at what she was wearing and cursed in his head. He couldn't tell if she was dressed for a date or not. She looked nice, but it was still impossible to tell what she thought of their outing.

"Yeah, that was always one of your dorky habits," Sam smirked.

"Well excuse me for not showing up to iCarly rehearsals twenty minutes late," Freddie chuckled.

"That was, like, five times at the _most_!"

"Try fifty!"

"At least I never-"

"Guys, stop!" Cat shrieked, covering her ears with her hands. "No fighting! I thought you were friends!"

"We weren't fighting," Sam said, giving Cat a strange look. "We were just having a normal conversation."

"Normal?" Cat sputtered. "That wasn't normal! That was-Aw, forget it! I'm going to go boil this water in our room!"

"Um, there's no stove in there," Sam called after her.

"Exactly!"

"So…she must be interesting to live with," Freddie commented.

"You get used to her," Sam shrugged, grabbing her purse. "Now come on, Fredwad, Mama's starving."  
Freddie smiled at the sound of his old nickname as he followed Sam out of the apartment.

"Okay," Freddie said, unlocking his car. "Where do you want to eat?"

"Um…I don't know," Sam said. "Where do _you _want to eat. I'm up for anything. We could go somewhere chill, foreign, fancy, quick…food's food to me."

"Well, um, I don't really know if I'm in the mood for _sandwiches_ or some fifty dollar salad…" Freddie said. "So I'll just leave it up to you."

"No, no," Sam said quickly. "We're already using the money I stole from your wallet to pay, you pick where we go."

"But you know more about the restaurants around here," Freddie pointed out. "So wouldn't it make more sense to-"

"Freddie," Sam suddenly sighed, cutting him off. "What are we doing?"

"Um…sitting in a car?"

"No, I mean with this," Sam said, looking down at her lap. She took a deep breath. "So is this a date or are we hanging out as friends?"  
Freddie blinked, taken aback at Sam's bluntness. At least she had finally asked the question that had been on his mind for so long now.

"I mean, not that I _care_," Sam continued. "I just wanted to clear it all up so I can enjoy my free food in peace and-"

"Okay, Sam," Freddie said, cutting her off. "The truth is…I've been wondering the same thing."

"You have?" she asked softly.

"I have," he nodded. "And, well…do _you _want it to be a date?"

Sam gave him a look. "I asked you the question first."

Freddie sighed. She had been the brave one and put her feelings out there the night at the lock-in. Now was his turn.

"Ever since you left," Freddie told her. "I-I've _missed_ you. And I realized, I still love you, Sam. I don't think I ever stopped. But you were in L.A., I was in Seattle…But now we're both here and-and yes. Yes, I-I do want this to be a date."

Sam stared back at him, not saying a word.

"But if you want us to just hang out today as friends, that's fine," Freddie said quickly. "I-I can handle that. I just don't want to make you feel uncomfortable or-"

He was interrupted as Sam crashed her lips to his, lacing her arms around his neck.

Freddie eagerly responded, deepening the kiss as he ran his fingers through her hair.

When the two finally pulled apart, they stared into the other's eyes, slightly out of breath.

"That was-" Freddie whispered, a bit shocked.

"_Very _nice," Sam grinned. "Good work."

"Thanks," Freddie chuckled. "You too."


	412. Chapter 412

_Stiff_

"So your mom _actually_ got banned from the gas station for-"

"Yup," Sam sighed. "And she had to have a meeting with her parole officer."

"Wow," Carly chuckled. "You're mom really knows how to keep things interesting."

"Nah, she's just insane," Sam said as Freddie walked into the Shay's apartment.

"Hey," he said brightly. "Guess whose mom got stuck working a double shift at work and won't be home until midnight tonight?"

"Aw, so does this mean you can skip your evening tick bath, baby?" Sam smirked.

"Shoosh yeah I can," Freddie nodded, clearly missing the sarcasm in his girlfriend's voice. "_And _I can eat food not filled with beets and zucchini tonight too!"

"Congratulations," Carly laughed.

"And," Freddie continued, sitting down next to Sam. "Since I have an empty apartment tonight, I was thinking you and I could, you know…"

"Hmm, I think I see what you're saying," Sam said, rolling her eyes as she leaned over to give him a quick kiss.

"And that's my cue to get up," Carly said, getting up off the couch and heading into the kitchen. "You guys want some popcorn?"

"Sure," the couple said simultaneously.

"So, what have you been up to today?" Freddie asked as Sam grabbed the remote from the coffee table and turned on the T.V.

"Oh you know, I slept until noon, ate a bucket of chicken, took a nap and wound up here," Sam said. "Oh, and my mom almost got arrested again, so I had _that _to deal with."

"Oh man, I'm sorry baby," Freddie frowned. "What'd she do?"

"You don't want to know," Sam said. "Let's just say you may not want to go to the gas station down the street for awhile…or ever again."

"Thanks for the warning," Freddie said, cringing slightly. "Anyway, so you want to come over around eight tonight?"

"How about nine?" Sam said. "I, um, have a thing to do at eight."

"A thing?" Freddie said. "What sort of thing?"

"Oh yeah," Carly nodded, coming back over with a bowl of popcorn. "Today's the day that you-"

"Shhh!" Sam hissed.

"Today's the day that you, um, buy a soda?" Carly finished lamely.

"Is everything okay?" Freddie asked, concerned.

"Yeah, yeah, everything's fine," Sam sighed. "And since _Carly _spilled the beans-"

"Come on, it's not that big of a deal," Carly defended. "He would've found out anyway."

"You don't know if anything's gonna happen!"

"Oh stop being so pessimistic,"

"I don't even know what that means!"

"Um, is anyone going to explain what's going on?" Freddie asked.

Sam took a deep breath. "Okay, tonight at eight o'clock, I sort of have an interview."

"An interview?" Freddie repeated. "Like for a _job_?"

"Um, sort of," Sam nodded. "It's-It's for a spot at this preforming arts college next year. After I graduate high school."

"Performing arts?" Freddie said slowly. "I-I didn't even know you were into that stuff."

"Yeah, well, I like acting and doing all that creative stuff for iCarly," Sam shrugged. "So I figured…why not? But it's not like it matters. The place is super competitive and I probably won't even get in."

"Sam, don't say that," Carly said. "You already made some huge progress by just _getting _this interview. I mean, back when you applied six moths ago, there were _thousands _of peoples trying to get in, and from that only _fifty _got interviews."

"Wait, you applied for this place six months ago?" Freddie said. "How come I'm just finding out about this now? Heck, you never even _talked _about being interested in this sort of thing."

"I didn't think it was important," Sam shrugged. "And I probably just got this interview because of iCarly…once they meet me, they won't be interested anymore."

"Come on, you're going to do great!" Carly assured her. "I mean, you've been going over your monologue for weeks, you have that video of you dancing at the beauty pageant to show, you sound _amazing _singing that song you've been practicing-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Freddie cut her off. "Sam! You can _sing_?"

"A little," Sam mumbled.

"Pfft, she's insanely good," Carly said.

"You okay?" Sam asked, looking at Freddie's expression.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Freddie said. "It's just…I can't believe I didn't know this…We've been dating for over a year and I didn't know you were interested in going into the performing arts or that you had this interview or that you could sing…"

"Hey, it's no big deal," Sam said firmly.

"It just seems like this is a big part of your life," Freddie replied. "I-I wish I could've been able to help you out applying or preparing for the interview."

"I-I'm sure Sam didn't mean to _not _tell you," Carly said quickly.

"Yeah, and hey, if for some reason I _do _get past this first interview, there's a second interview, you can help me with that one," Sam said, patting his shoulder.

Freddie didn't reply.

"Alright, Sam, you should probably start getting ready," Carly said, looking at her phone. "You only have an hour before you're meeting this guy."

"Oh, right," Sam said, getting to her feet. She leaned down and gave Freddie a quick kiss.

"Come on, don't be all glum," Sam said. "Just remember, when I come back, we have an empty apartment all to ourselves."

"I'm not glum," Freddie sighed. "Good luck on your interview, Sam. You deserve this."

Sam showed a small smile. "Thanks."

Freddie watched Sam and Carly head upstairs, both chatting eagerly about the interview. He couldn't believe that he didn't know such an important thing about Sam. He thought as boyfriend and girlfriend, they knew each other pretty well.

Maybe he was wrong.

….

"Hey, are you cooking ham?" Sam asked excitedly later that evening as she let herself into the Benson's apartment. "Mama knows her meat fumes, I could smell it getting off the elevator."

"Yeah, I thought you'd like to eat something after your interview," Freddie said, greeting her with a kiss. "How'd it go?"

Sam shrugged. "I don't know. I guess I'll see in a week when I find out if I got a second interview. So where's this ham?"

"In here," Freddie said, leading her into the kitchen. "But before we eat…I thought maybe we could do something?"

"What?" Sam said suspiciously. Everybody knew better than to prolong her ham-time.

But then again, Freddie was the exception to so many of her rules.

"Okay," Freddie said, sitting down at the table. "Sam, today I-I can't believe it was the first time I found out that you had _any _interest in going into a future with performing arts and-"

"Oh jeez, are you _still _on this?" Sam moaned, rolling her eyes. "Look, I'm _sorry _I didn't tell you. There, happy?"

"I'm not mad at you or anything," Freddie replied calmly. "It just…it really opened my eyes. I love you so much Sam."

"And I love you too," Sam said. "But I don't get why you're freaking out about-"

"I get that couples aren't ever going to know every tiny detail about each other," Freddie continued. "And I'm okay with that. There's obviously some things that you share with only Carly, and there are some things I share with Spencer or Gibby. But we should be sharing the _important _things with each other. I trust you and I hope you trust me enough to tell me these things. So how about you and I play a game?"

"A game?" Sam repeated.

"I'll go first," Freddie said. "I'll tell you one thing that you think is important for you to know about me, and then you go."

"This doesn't sound like a fun game," Sam said.

"I just-I just want us to feel comfortable sharing these things with each other," Freddie said softly. "I plan on being with you for a long time, Sam, and for any relationship to work, there needs to be that level of trust."

Sam looked down at her lap and slowly nodded. "Okay," she finally agreed.

"Thank you," Freddie said. "Ask me a question you've wanted to know the answer to for a long time."

Sam was silent for a moment before finally taking a deep breath. "Are you completely over Carly?"

Freddie blinked. "What?"

"You're the one who wanted to do this," Sam whispered. "So answer the question."  
"Sam, I-Yes," Freddie said. "Yes, of course I'm over her. I've been over her for years. Did you really not know that?"

"Sometimes it just seems like you'd be better off with her," Sam said, not meeting his gaze. "She's nicer, sweeter, smarter, prettier-"

"None of that is true," Freddie said. "I love Carly, but she's almost like my sister. She's a great friend and I'm glad I have her and Spencer across the hall from me, but I'm not _in _love with her. I never really was. I've only been in love once, and I still am. With you."

Sam looked up. "You mean that?"

Freddie nodded. "Sam, you're beautiful. You're funny and smart and-and _perfect_."

Sam cheeks blushed crimson. "Alright…your turn."

Freddie thought for a moment. "When did you first become interested in going into a performing arts program?"

"You're really stuck on that one," Sam chuckled. "I dunno…I guess I've always liked it. I may have hated all those dumb beauty pageants because of the frilly dresses and stupid girls, but I always had fun being on stage. But, you know, most tough girls aren't into that sort of thing, so I always tried to keep it quiet. I only sing in the shower and act on iCarly."

"Why didn't you ever say anything to me? After we started dating?"

Sam shrugged. "I didn't want you to think I was any less tough."

Freddie laughed. "Baby, you could skip into school in the girliest dress alive, throwing flower petals and gushing about the color pink, and you'd still be the toughest girl I know."

"Yeah, well," Sam chuckled. "Don't count on that happening anytime soon. So is it my turn again?"

"Yeah, ask away," Freddie said.

"Why do you always speak Spanish randomly?"

"Oh," Freddie said. "Well I-"

"Nah, I don't want waste my question on that," Sam interrupted. "Okay…what has been the scariest moment of your life?"

"Easy," Freddie said, catching Sam off guard. She though he would've had to think about that one for awhile. "You remember a few years ago, when you and Carly were fighting and both wound up on that window washer all the way at the top of the building and almost fell?"

"That's kind of a hard thing to forget," Sam said.

"Well…that was it."

"_That _was your scariest moment?" Sam frowned. "Why?"

"Because I almost lost you," Freddie said simply.

"We-We weren't even dating then," Sam pointed out.

"Didn't mean I still didn't care about you," Freddie said. "Whether I lose you as a friend or as the love of my life…it would be the scariest moment for me."  
Sam rolled her eyes. "You sure you didn't make up this game so you could be extra mushy?"

"Ha, ha," Freddie said. "My turn…tell me about your dad?"

Sam's expression suddenly changed. "What?"

"I mean, I know he left your mom," Freddie said. "But you've never said anything more about that. What was he like before he left? Was he nice? Do you still talk to him?"  
Sam didn't reply.

"I mean, I don't even know his name," Freddie continued. "It's just weird that-Sam?"

He looked at his girlfriend and noticed the corners of her eyes were wet and she had silent tears streaming down her cheeks. Her shoulders had stiffened and she looked like she wanted nothing more than to be anywhere else.

"I'm sorry," Freddie said at once. "I-I-you don't have to answer that. I shouldn't have asked. That was too far."

"It's okay," Sam said shakily. She looked up at him. "I've never told anyone about him…not even Carly. But I want to tell you."

"Are you sure?" Freddie asked gently. "You don't have to."

Sam nodded. "His name was Daniel. Him and my mom went to high school together. I-I never knew why he left. I thought we were a happy family. Back when he was still around, my mom was normal. Or, well, normal for her. We used to do the family picture thing, go on vacations, go out to restaurants…I remember when me and Melanie were little, we would wait by the door when it got dark to tackle my dad when he came home from work. He would always play with us and tuck us into bed."

"That sounds nice," Freddie said.

"It was," Sam agreed. She sighed. "And then…I don't really know what happened. But soon he started coming home later and later. He brought weird people over to our house all the time and he started acting differently. He stopped playing with me and Melanie, and he'd always yell at us and my mom. And then…And then there was that one day, when he said he was going to go pick up a gallon of milk and, well, he never came back."

"Oh, Sam," Freddie said, putting his arms around him.

"He never even said bye," Sam said, resting her head on Freddie's shoulder. "He just left. My mom always told us he turned into a loser and that we were better off without him, but sometimes I still miss him. And I don't know why, because I hate him so much for leaving."

"He was your dad," Freddie said. "He shouldn't have left. A parent shouldn't ever abandon their child willingly like that."

"But he did," Sam sniffed. "He just walked out. And I'll never know why."

Freddie continued to hold her for a few moments.

"I'll never leave you, you know," he finally said.

Sam looked up at him.

"I promise," Freddie told her. "I love you. You'll never have to worry about me leaving, no matter what happens."

Sam laced her fingers through his. "I know that…"

"Let's stop now," Freddie said. "And eat some ham. I'm sorry I forced that out of you."

Sam shook her head. "I liked this…But you're a dead man if one tiny detail ever leaves this apartment."

"I wouldn't dream of it," Freddie assured her.

"Good," Sam said, wiping her eyes. "Now go get Mama her big fork…I have a ham to devour."


	413. Chapter 413

**AN-This is a sequel to ch392, where Carly finds out Freddie is still in love with Sam after she reads his journal. **

…

_Ability_

It had been one week since Carly had read Freddie's journal and caused Freddie to confess his lingering feelings for Sam. And ever since, Freddie had been more distant than Carly had ever seen him. He only came over to the apartment when they needed to do iCarly stuff, and even then, he wasn't the same Freddie who would constantly make _Galaxy Wars _references or drone on and on about tech news neither her nor Sam cared about.

Freddie had told her he would be fine, but Carly knew that he was far from that.

That afternoon, the three teens were up in the iCarly studio, working on planning for their upcoming show the next week.

"Okay, I think we should practice the alien cruise bit first," Carly said as Freddie fiddled on his laptop and Sam played on her phone. "And then work on finishing up that pet luau skit and our piece where Gibby has the ability to read minds."

She looked from Sam to Carly, neither responding.

"Um…guys?"

"Huh, oh, sure," Freddie nodded, still not meeting her gaze as he grabbed his camera. "I'm ready when you two are."

"You ready Sam?" Carly asked, turning to her best friend. "Sam?"

"Huh? I didn't do it!" Sam said, snapping her neck up.

"We have to rehearse," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "So if you could _please _put your phone down for two seconds that would be great. Who have you been texting all this time anyway?"

"You know that guy on the wrestling team? Joshua Hunter?" Sam asked, getting to her feet.

"Yeah…" Carly nodded. "What about him?"

"Today him and I had to work together during biology," Sam said, grinning. "And while we were supposed to be dissecting a frog or something, we were talking and he kept making all these really funny jokes. At the end of class we wound up swapping numbers and he seems like a pretty cool guy."  
Carly could see Freddie stiffen up out of the corner of her eye.

_Oh man_, Carly thought to herself. _Poor Freddie…_

"Wow," Carly said, plastering on a fake smile. "That-That's really nice."

"Yeah, I thought he would be just another jerky jock, but he's so sweet too," Sam continued. "_And _since he's on the wrestling team, he's actually a decent opponent to have at arm wrestling! Guess how long it took me to beat him? Almost ten seconds! No one's ever lasted that long against me!"

Carly looked over her shoulder at Freddie, who was staring at his shoes. Suddenly, taking a deep breath, he walked back over to his tech cart and set his camera back down.

"Freddie?" Carly asked gently. "You-You okay?"

"Fine," Freddie mumbled. "I-I just remembered I left a casserole in the oven at home…I need to go check on it."

"Dude, you have to film us!" Sam said, but Freddie was already out of the studio.

"Okay, what's been up his butt lately?" Sam asked. "He's been all mopey for the past week. It's getting annoying."  
_Don't say anything_, Carly told herself firmly. _You promised Freddie_!

"He, just, um, might have a lot on his plate," Carly said lamely.

"Whatever," Sam shrugged. "Anyway, since it looks like we're not doing any iCarly stuff without Fredwad, you care if I head out too? I want to send Josh a picture of Frothy, since he said that his cat was way more disgusting than mine. Once he gets a look at Frothy's weird growth and three legs, he's not going to have any argument."

"I-Sure," Carly nodded. "But, um, Sam?"

"Yeah?" Sam asked, grabbing her bag.

Carly sighed. "Just…Please try not to talk about Joshua in front of Freddie too much, okay?"

Sam frowned. "Why?"

"It's just…please just try not to," Carly said. "Please."

"Does Freddie not like Josh or something?" Sam asked. "I didn't know they even knew each other."

"I don't know if they do or not," Carly said. "But-But-Look, I can't say anything more."

"Carls, what's going on?" Sam asked. "Wait, is that why Freddie left? Because I was talking about Josh?"

"It _may _have been a factor," Carly said sheepishly.

"But that's ridiculous!" Sam said. "Why would Freddie get all wazzed off about that?"

_Please just use your head, Sam_, Carly begged internally. _Figure it out so I don't have to tell you._

"Well, he's being stupid," Sam scoffed. "Josh never did anything to him! Fredlump is probably just upset because Josh talked Principal Franklin into giving him that good locker by the water fountain that Freddie's been trying to switch into for years. How dumb can that nub-"

"It's not about the dang locker!" Carly exclaimed, catching herself by surprise.

Sam gave Carly a strange look. "Um, okay. Then what is it?"

"Sam…_think_," Carly said. "How would you feel if Freddie was suddenly all flirty with some new girl?"

"I'm not following," Sam said, confused.

_Keep your mouth shut, Carly_, Carly told herself. _Don't say it. Don't say-_

"Freddie's still in love with you!" Carly blurted out.

Sam blinked, staring back at Carly, astounded.

"_What_?"

"I-I wasn't supposed to say anything to you," Carly slowly admitted. "Freddie made me promise. I found out by accident last week."

"He- He still loves me?"

"Yes," Carly sighed. "He never got over you. But he was afraid to tell you; he was afraid you'd laugh at him and reject him. That's why he didn't tell you. And I guess today, hearing that you had apparently moved on…that was all he could take."

Sam was silent.

"Don't tease him," Carly said. "He's _really _upset about this. I haven't seen him so sad since…ever."

"Do you think he went back to his apartment?" Sam asked after a moment.

"Huh?"

"Freddie," Sam said. "Think that's where he is?"

"Well, yeah, probably," Carly nodded. "But why do you-"

Sam didn't hear her, though, as she ran out of the studio.

…

Freddie lay alone in his bed, staring up at the ceiling, trying to ignore the panging feeling in his gut.

Why'd Sam have to go and flaunt her new boy around like that? Didn't she know how that made him want to punch something?

No, of course she wouldn't know that. Because he had never said anything to her, had he?

Maybe he should've listened to Carly and said _something_. Maybe then he wouldn't feel so defeated.

Suddenly, there was a knock on his bedroom door and a second later Sam stepped in.

Freddie jolted up. "What are you doing here?"  
Sam shrugged, walking slowly over to his shelf of _Galaxy Wars _collectables. "Thought you had a casserole in the oven."

"I…ate it," Freddie lied miserably. "Now why are you here? Don't you have John or Joshua or _somebody _to text?"  
Sam turned around, leaning against the wall across from his bed. "I don't like Joshua."

Freddie frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"I mean I like him, sure," Sam shrugged. "But I'd never be able to see myself actually _with _him."

"Oh…" Freddie said, a little confused as to why she was suddenly telling him all this. "Well, um, okay. I-I didn't care or anything, but-"

Sam sat down slowly on the edge of his bed, raising an eyebrow.

Freddie sighed. "Carly told you, didn't she?"

"Yeah," Sam said softly. "That you were still in-"

"Great," Freddie mumbled.

"Don't be mad at her, she's Carly, she tried as hard as she could not to tell me," Sam said. "She practically exploded when she finally couldn't hold it in anymore."

"I figured it was only a matter of time," Freddie said, trying hard to avoid her eyes.

Sam was silent for a moment, before finally opening her mouth. "Did you really think I would make fun of you for it?"

Freddie shrugged. "I thought that's what we did. We torment each other. It's our thing."

"Yeah, about stupid things," Sam said. "Like your crazy mom, your nerdy _Galaxy Wars _chiz, your hair-"

"Not helping!"

"But not about serious chiz," Sam continued. "I mean, after all, _you _could've embarrassed me live on iCarly last year at the mental hospital. But you didn't."

Freddie didn't reply.

"I wouldn't have teased you or anything," Sam said softly. "Believe me, I know what it feels like to like a person and be afraid to tell them."

"I just…we said we were over each other," Freddie said.

"We never said that," Sam said simply.

"Huh?"

"When we broke up," Sam said. "We said we weren't ready yet, that we wanted to eventually give each other another shot, and that we loved each other. Not that we were over each other."

_She's right, _Freddie realized.

"I just-I didn't know-" Freddie muttered.

Sam gently set her hand down on top of his, causing him to finally look up at her blue eyes.

"You know," she said softly. "Maybe if you were to tell me what you told Carly…you'd be surprised at the response you get."

Freddie could hardly believe his ears. Sam wasn't flat-out rejecting him? Maybe Carly telling her wasn't a horrible thing after all.

Swallowing, Freddie slowly opened his mouth. "I-I still love you, Sam," he said shakily. "I really do. I-I want us to be together again. It's been killing me not having you with me as my girlfriend."

Sam gave him a small smile. "See? Was that so hard?"

"Well?" Freddie asked.

"Hmmm," Sam said thoughtfully. "You want us to get back together again? I dunno…I'll have to think about that."

"What? You said-"

"Calm down, Fredifer, I was kidding," Sam chuckled, squeezing his hand. "Yes. I want to get back together too."

"You-You're really saying yes to me this time?"

"Did I not just say that?" Sam asked, rolling her eyes. "I thought you were the smart one in this relationship."

Freddie laughed, suddenly feeling more elated than he had been in weeks.

"Wow," Freddie said, hardly daring to believe his luck. "I-You-Thank you."

"Thank you?" Sam repeated. "Wow, you're a little rusty at this. You and I just got back together, we're alone in your room, and all you're doing is _thanking _me?"

"Oh, right," Freddie said, leaning over to her, slowly pressing his lips to hers, feeling the electricity surge within his body. Her lips felt so familiar, it was as though he had never left. His hands wrapped around her, knowing just wear to fall, and he felt the amazing sensation of her wrapping her own arms around his neck, just like she used to.

He'd have to remember to thank Carly.

Later, of course. Right now, he had more important things to do.


	414. Chapter 414

_Preference_

"Okay, girls," Sam said, sitting down in front of her twin thirteen-year old daughters. "You know why we're here."

"No…" Emma frowned.

"You just told us to come down here two seconds ago," Ashton said. "We have no idea why we're here."

"Oh, right," Sam said. "Well, since you guys turned thirteen last week and have officially become teenagers and young women and blah, blah, blah, I think it's important for the three of us to talk about some important things you might need to know about in the future."

"Oh my God," Emma moaned. "_Please _tell me you're not gonna start having _The Talk_ with us."

"You gave us the lowdown last year, remember?" Ashton said. "Changing body, hormones… please don't make us go through that again."

"What? No, gross, there's no way _I _would do that again," Sam cringed. "No, today I'm actually going to give you _useful _information."

"What kind of information?" Ashton asked curiously.

"Well," Sam said. "Like I said, you guys are thirteen now. And I know you guys are starting to get to that age where you're starting to get interested in boys-"

"Starting?" Emma scoffed. "Ashton's been boy crazy since she could talk."

"I have not been boy crazy," Ashton snapped. "I just happen to think they're cute sometimes…most of the time."

"Right…" Sam frowned. "Anyway, well now boys your age are at that stage where they're not going to always be stupid and immature all the time…most of the time, sure, but they're also going to start going after _you _now."

"Finally," Ashton grinned.

"Your poor dad," Sam mumbled under her breath, rolling her eyes. "As I was saying…your both very attractive, obviously _my _genes at work; boys are going to notice you. Unfortunately, that _also _means that they sometimes won't know when to back it up and take 'no' for an answer. Which is why we're here today."

"What do you mean?" Emma asked curiously.

"Here," Sam said, grabbing the bag next to her. "Take a sock."

"A sock?" Ashton repeated.

"Yes, a sock, take one," Sam said.

"And Quincy says _his _parents are weird," Emma muttered.

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that," Sam said. "Now, the sock alone isn't going to be much help against pushy guys. _But_, with a bit of _butter _inside-"

"_Butter_?" Ashton exclaimed. "Ew! You want us to put butter in the socks?"

"My personal preference is hard butter," Sam said simply, pulling out a few sticks of butter. "Much harder than the other stuff."

Giving their mother questioning glances, the twins stuffed their socks with the sticks of butter.

"And viola!" Sam said proudly. "You both now have your very own butter socks!"

"What good is a butter socks?" Ashton asked.

"Yeah, these things aren't going to do anything," Emma said.

"Oh really?" Sam smirked. She looked around the room and spotted the ugly vase her mother-in-law had given the family last Christmas. "Go get me that vase grandma got us last year."

Emma got up and brought the vase over to Sam, setting it down on the coffee table.

"Now watch and learn," Sam said. With one mighty swing, she brought the butter sock down hard on the vase, reducing it to nothing more than tiny shards of glass.

"Whoa!" the twins said simultaneously.

"Impressive, right?" Sam said.

"Totally," Ashton nodded.

"But it wouldn't work on a person, would it?" Emma asked.

"Oh, no?" Sam said, raising an eyebrow. "Just watch…Hey, Freddie!" she called into the kitchen, where she knew her husband was preparing dinner. "Can you come in here for a sec, baby?"

"What is it?" Freddie asked, coming into the living room, obviously not knowing the fate that awaited him. "By the way, did something break in here? I thought I just heard a crash or something, but I'm not sure that-Ow!"

Sam had slung her butter sock into his arm, causing him to topple down onto the floor.

"Sam!" he exclaimed indignantly. "What was that for?"

"What was what for?" Sam smiled innocently as Freddie scrambled to his feet, the twins laughing hysterically from the couch.

"You _assaulted _me with your butter sock!" Freddie sputtered. "In front of Emma and Ashton!"

"Well I was showing them how to use the butter sock," Sam explained. "They needed a demonstration!"

"You're showing them-No!" Freddie frowned. "I don't want my kids to be violent! You can't just show them that it's okay to physically brutalize people with socks full of butter! That completely goes against everything I believe in as a parent and I-"

"Relax, Fredwad, I'm showing them how to use it so they can teach any pushy guys they meet a lesson," Sam said.

"I-Oh," Freddie said. "So…they're just gonna use it on guys to get them to leave them alone?"

"Yes, baby," Sam said, patting his back. "But if you'd rather I stop-"

"No! No, teach them!" Freddie said. He turned to the twins. "And you two…if _any _guys starts _flirting _or _talking _or even _looking _at you, you get that butter sock out!"

"Only if he's not cute," Ashton said.

"Or if he smells weird," Emma said.

"Yeah, after all, dad, it would be hard to get a date if we just start hitting _every _guy we meet with the butter sock, right?" Ashton pointed out.

"That's the point!"

"Look, girls, just use it if a guy is making you feel uncomfortable and he won't leave you alone _after _you ask him to, okay?" Sam said.

"What about me?" Freddie demanded. "What if _I _don't feel comfortable?"

"Dude, you're not comfortable with boys even acknowledging their presence," Sam said.

"Can I go try this out outside?" Emma asked, looking down at her own butter sock in her hands.

"Sure, just don't break anything," Sam nodded.

"I'm gonna tell Quincy to come over," Emma grinned. "He owes me five bucks, and now I'm _definitely _gonna get it back."

"Great," Freddie said as the girls ran outside. "Now Gibby's gonna start yelling about hospital bills again."


	415. Chapter 415

**AN-This chapter is a sequel to chapter 402, where Sam and Freddie realize they're having a baby while they're in college. **

…**..**

_Sunshine_

"Will you _stop_ that? You're not supposed to be doing any sort of physically daunting tasks, you know," Freddie said, jumping to his feet as he watched Sam, who was currently eight-months pregnant, try and lift a heavy box that was sitting in the middle of her and Carly's shared living room. "Here, let me do it."

"It's not heavy," Sam snapped, though stepping back to let Freddie lift the box. "It's just a bunch of my old textbooks I'm selling online. Figure I can make a few bucks from them."

"You don't need them anymore?" Freddie frowned.

"Nope," Sam said simply, sitting down on the sofa. "It's not like I'm going to be finishing college or anything, remember?"

Last semester, Sam had taken a temporary hiatus from her classes at the University of Washington. With her condition, she knew it was going to be very hard to keep up, especially since she wasn't exactly a natural student in the first place.

"Baby," Freddie sighed, sitting down next to her. "We've been over this. You can go back to school after you have this baby."

"With _what _money?" Sam said bitterly. "Every penny I've made has been funneled into this kid. It's not like that's gonna stop once it's born."

Freddie didn't reply. He felt guilty, sometimes, that Sam had dropped out of college while he was still currently enrolled at MIT. True, his grades had taken a definite hit with him flying out to Seattle every other weekend and working twenty hours a week as over-the-phone tech support, but he still had the chance to go, and thankfully, with him taking courses over the past summer, he was set to graduate early at the end of the semester.

"This is what everyone expected, though, isn't it?" Sam sighed. "They probably all just thought it would happen in high school."

"Sam," Freddie said gently. "It-It's not too late…I know we decided on-"

Sam shook her head.

It had been one of the toughest decisions her and Freddie had ever had to make in their lives; whether to keep this baby or give it up for adoption.

Both of them knew they clearly weren't ready to be parents.

Freddie had dreamed of getting a developing job at the Pear Company for years, and he was closer than ever, and Sam was actually hoping to go to law school after she graduated.

They were both young. They were adults, yes, but that didn't mean they were ready for the responsibility of raising another life all on their own. Sam barely knew how to do her own laundry and Freddie had almost burned down the kitchen the last time he tried to cook.

And then of course they were both broke, one of the side effects of choosing to further their education after high school.

It seemed like the easiest decision, to give their child up for adoption, and that's what Sam and Freddie had decided to do five months ago.

But then they went to Sam's doctor, and they saw their child's small figure appear on the ultrasound monitor and heard its heart beat from within Sam. And suddenly, neither of them cared how hard it would be or about how much they would have to sacrifice.

This was their child that they had created together, and they couldn't bear to be separated from it.

"No," Sam said firmly. "I'm not giving up my baby." She slowly reached into her pocket and pulled out an envelope. "I got paid today…It's not as much as my last check, because I had to take off to go to the doctors a couple weeks ago, but, well, I'll add it to the pile."

"We're doing good, baby," Freddie said, taking the envelope. "We have the crib bought, the changing table's almost paid for, we found a bunch of clothes at the second hand shop, plus with everything Carly's bought for this kid…we're not completely in the red, you know."

"Just wait until our first bill from the new apartment comes in," Sam mumbled. "Then you won't be saying that."

Freddie bit his lip nervously. He knew Sam was right.

Since the couple obviously couldn't live in the small, two-bedroom apartment Carly and Sam currently shared, they had started to look for a new place. They found a reasonable place in the same building, though, only a few floors down. They weren't moving in until after Freddie graduated and moved back to Washington permanently next month. Even with everything the two of them were making working and saving, though, they both knew the apartment wasn't going to be cheap. Carly's father paid for the one her and Sam shared now, but Sam knew exactly how much the rent was, and it almost caused her physical pain.

"Look," Freddie said, trying to make Sam feel better. "Once I graduate and have a degree from MIT, I'll be able to find a decent job. Maybe even a really good job. I can make more money so paying for everything won't be such an issue anymore. I mean, it's not like we're in the worst position for this; things could be worse. This could've happened when we were in high school, or neither of us could've found jobs, or our parents could've disowned us…we're twenty, Sam. That's not exactly the youngest age anybody's ever had a baby at."

"So what? You think this is going to be _easy_?" Sam said, narrowing her eyes.

"No, of course not," Freddie said quickly. "But I just think we've both been dwelling on the negative too much and-"

"Well _sorry _for being realistic!" Sam snapped, getting to her feet. "Maybe you don't realize how stressful this whole thing is since _you're _not the one carrying our baby around!"

"How can you say that?" Freddie retorted, his voice rising. "You think I'm not stressed? I get _maybe _three hours of sleep a night! I'm barely passing my classes right now and I have to spend half of my days on the phone with _idiots _to try and make some cash!"

"Did _you _have a bunch of people staring at you your last day of classes, whispering behind your back when you could barely fit into your seat to take your final exam because you were six months pregnant?" Sam yelled loudly. "Do _you_ feel like you're about to puke every ten minutes? Do _you_ have to work at some disgusting restaurant where you're on your extremely swollen feet for eight hours a shift? Huh?"

"Sam…" Freddie said, trying to calm himself down before he said something he knew he'd regret. "Sam, please. Let's-Let's just stop. I think we're both trying to outdo one another on the pity scale, and that's ridiculous. Obviously this has been hard on _both _of us, but if we just talk-"

"_You _can talk to yourself," Sam said coldly, turning around and heading to her bedroom.

Freddie sighed as he heard her door slam behind her.

Honestly, he was used to this. He knew that this late in the pregnancy, Sam's mood swings would be getting worse. He just wished he knew what to do about them.

Suddenly, he heard the front door to the apartment open and Carly walked in.

"Hey," Carly said brightly. "I thought I heard you come in last night, but I needed to get to sleep for my morning classes today. Where's Sam?"

"In her room," Freddie said heavily as Carly set her bag down.

"Is she asleep?"

"No," Freddie said. "We had a fight."

"Oh," Carly frowned. "I'm sorry. Sam's had a rough week. He morning sickness was really bad, her boss made her work an extra shift, and, um, she got her LSAT scores back."

"Her LSAT scores?" Freddie repeated. "Sam took the LSAT?"

"Yeah," Carly said. "She took it awhile ago…back when you guys were planning on giving the baby up for adoption. She just found out the scores had been posted online."

"Did she do bad or something?" Freddie asked.

"No," Carly said. "That's just it…She did _really _good. Her scores were in the top twenty percent from our university. She-She could've pretty much gotten into any law school she wanted with them."

"Oh man," Freddie mumbled. "And now she can't go…poor Sam."

"I think she was more upset than she let on," Carly told him.

"Yeah," Freddie sighed. "I'm gonna go talk to her."

"Want me to leave you two alone?" Carly asked. "I can go back out if you want me to."

"No, you just got home," Freddie said. "Besides, this _is _your place too. I'll talk to her in her room."

Freddie walked back to Sam's door and knocked twice before pushing the door open.

Sam was lying on her bed, staring up at the ceiling. She had one hand rested on her swollen abdomen, gently rubbing circles on it.

"Sam?" Freddie said softly.

Sam looked over at him, slowly sitting up. "Sorry," she sighed. "For yelling at you…stupid hormones."

"It's okay," Freddie said, sitting down next to her. He put an arm around her shoulders as he leaned down to give her a short kiss. "Carly, um, told me you found out your LSAT scores…I'm really proud of you, Sam."

"It's not like they're gonna do me any good," Sam mumbled.

"Sam, I really wish you would stop thinking your life is over," Freddie said gently. "It's not. Tons of people go back to school after they have a kid. It's _doable_. It may be challenging, but you definitely know how to rise to the occasion."

Sam looked down at her lap. "I guess I've been kind of…_snappy_ lately. And-And you've been so nice to me still."

"Of course, I love you," Freddie said, kissing her again. "And you have a right to be snappy. You're carrying our child."

Sam gave him a small smile.

"But-But I do have to ask you this," Freddie said slowly. "Do you regret deciding to keep this baby?"

Sam looked up at him, her blue eyes sparkling.

"No," she whispered. "I know I've been complaining about how hard everything is going to be, but-but it's gonna be worth it, right? We're going to have a baby. He or she is going to be our very own."

"Yeah," Freddie smiled, placing his hand on her stomach on top of hers.

She gave a small wince.

"You okay?" Freddie asked, concerned.

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "The baby's just been moving around like crazy in there the past few days. Anyway…you were right before. We've been being too pessimistic. You're about to graduate from MIT, you'll get a good job with no problem. And once the baby starts preschool, I can start going back to school. And our parents have been helping us…your mom agreed to pay for all the medical bills, my mom-well, she bought us some baby clothes. And we have the apartment all ready to move into when you graduate! We're actually gonna be a tiny little family."

Freddie chuckled. "Hey, speaking of the apartment…I got bored on the plane ride here last night so I started playing around on my Pearpad…"

He reached for the device that was lying on Sam's bedside table and hit a few buttons.

"Look," he said. "I made a rough design of the baby's room."

Sam took the Pearpad from him, staring at the image on the screen.

"I remembered the room dimensions and just went from there," Freddie explained. "I thought we could put the crib by the window, so the baby will get plenty of sunshine and be able to look outside. And we could the changing table here, next to that rocking chair we found at that garage sale last month. And I thought we could paint the room yellow, since we don't know if it's a boy or a girl."

"It's amazing," Sam breathed. "The baby will love it."

"I figure I can paint it next weekend when I come down," Freddie said. "Hopefully I'll be able to squeeze in some time to study for my finals then too…"

"Well why don't you just do it after your exams," Sam suggested. "I mean, the baby isn't due for another week after that, so you should have plenty of time to-ow!"

"What's wrong?" Freddie asked as Sam gripped her sheets in pain.

"I don't know," Sam said. "Maybe I've been laying down too long…sometimes during the night my back starts to hurt and I have to get up and walk it off."

"Here, let me help you up," Freddie said, taking Sam's hand as she struggled to her feet. "You feel any better?"

"Not really," Sam said. "The doctor told me it's normal to start to feel all crampy the last month, but I didn't think it would be this-Ah!"

She gripped Freddie's hand tightly.

"Do you want me to call the doctor?" Freddie asked. "Maybe there's something we can do to make the pain go away at least a little."

"No, I can handle it," Sam said, slightly out of breath. "I'm not gonna go crying to my doctor about a little-"

Suddenly, she stopped talking and her eyes grew wide as she felt something wet run down her leg.

"What is it?" Freddie asked.

"I-I think my water just broke," Sam whispered.

"What?" Freddie exclaimed. "But-But you still have another month! Are you sure?"

"Positive," Sam gasped as she gripped Freddie's hand again as she felt a contraction ripple through her body. "Freddie, I'm going to have the baby. Now!"

"Okay, okay, don't panic," Freddie said, though feeling more terrified than he had been in his whole life. "Let's get you to the hospital and-"

"Ow!" Sam yelled, almost losing her balance. "Ow, ow, ow!"

"Carly!" Freddie called as he held Sam steady herself. "Carly! Help!"

"What's going on?" Carly asked, rushing into the room.

"Sam's in labor," Freddie told her. "Can you drive us to the hospital? Now?"

"Y-Yeah, of course," Carly nodded. "But are you sure? I thought the baby wasn't due until-"

"Will everybody stop asking me if I'm sure?" Sam said loudly. "Trust me, you _know _when another _person _is coming out of you!"

"Alright, let's go," Carly said, helping Freddie guide Sam out of the room. "Let me just go grab my keys."  
"Freddie?" Sam said quietly. "I'm scared."

"I know," Freddie said. "So am I. But just remember, you can do this, Sam. I love you so much."

…

"I _hate _you!" Sam screamed two hours later in the delivery room, her face dripping with sweat as she clenched Freddie's hand. "You did this to me!"

"Sam, baby, it's almost over," Freddie said, trying not to think about how many broken bones he probably had in his hand. He looked over to the doctor at the foot of Sam's bed. "It _is _almost over, right?"

"Next few pushes should do it," the doctor said.

"I'm so proud of you, Sam," Freddie said, stroking her damp blonde hair.

"It hurts so much," Sam moaned.

"I know, but you're almost there," Freddie said. "Just think about-"

"Ah!" Sam yelled as she felt another contraction.

"Okay, Sam, I need you to push as hard as you can," the doctor told her.

Sam nodded, and Freddie could tell she was in so much pain as she pushed with all her might.

"Why is this taking so long," Sam gasped once the contraction had run its course.

"Alright, Sam, this next one has to be it," the doctor said. "The baby's crowning. Mr. Benson, would you like to see?"

"Yeah," Freddie said, anxious to catch his first real glace of his child. Upon looking, though, Freddie felt queasy…there was a _lot _going on down there.

"Not all fathers can handle it," the doctor said as Freddie quickly retreated back to the head of the bed.

"No," Freddie mumbled. "I guess not…"

"I feel another contraction," Sam cringed, taking Freddie's hand again.

"Alright, this is it," the doctor told her. "Push harder than you ever had before. After that…you can see your baby."

Sam looked up at Freddie, who gave her a comforting smile. "You can do it, Sam," he whispered.

Sam pushed hard, feeling pain worse than anything she could've eve imagined. Still, though, she did not let up, and just when she thought she was going to pass out from the pain…a small cry filled the delivery room.

"Oh my God," Freddie whispered, craning his neck to see his and Sam's newborn child. "Wow…"

"Congratulations," the doctor said as a nurse stepped over to begin cleaning up the crying baby. "It's a girl."

Sam, still trying to catch her breath, smiled. "We have a daughter," she said to Freddie.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "We do. I love you so much, Sam. You did so good."

"Did I hurt your hand?" Sam asked.

"Don't worry about that," Freddie chuckled, ignoring the numb feeling in his left hand.

"Would you like to see your daughter?" the nurse asked kindly, coming over to the couple with a small pink bundle in her arms.

Sam nodded eagerly, holding out her arms.

She looked down at her daughter for the first time, her dark brown eyes staring up at her.

"Hi," Sam whispered, feeling as though she might cry. "Hi, sweetie. I'm your mommy."

"She's beautiful," Freddie said softly.

"I know, she is," Sam said.

And suddenly, all the fear and hesitations and worries Sam had seemed to disappear as she held her daughter. She looked up at Freddie. "You want to hold her?"

"Duh," Freddie grinned, holding out his arms.

Sam carefully transferred the infant go Freddie. "Make sure you have her head supported," she told him. "And watch her hands. And don't-"

"I have her," Freddie assured her. He smiled down at his daughter, feeling tears well up in his eyes.

"Hi," he said softly. "I'm your daddy. I already love you so much, honey. You're just so…perfect."

"Do you two have a name picked out?" the doctor asked, coming back over to the couple.

Sam and Freddie exchanged glances. For months, they had been narrowing down names, trying to figure out the perfect one. Finally, they had picked the perfect name for a daughter and a perfect name for a son.

"Yeah," Sam replied. "Her name is Carla. Carla Rose Benson."

"I'll go have the desk staff get that name on the birth certificate then," the doctor said. "And again, congratulations."

"I can't believe we have a baby," Sam said as Freddie handed Carla back to her.

"Me neither," Freddie said.

"Freddie?" Sam said, her voice soft.

"What is it, baby?" Freddie asked.

"Thank you," she said shakily.

"For what?" Freddie questioned, confused.

"For being there during this whole thing," Sam said. "I know how much you gave up."

"I gave up just as much as you did," Freddie told her.

"I know, but-but you could've easily left," Sam said. "A lot of other guys would've…but not you."

"I love you," Freddie said earnestly. "I would never leave you. And I'm never going to leave Carla either. You two are my world now."

…**.**

**AN-In case anybody was wondering, the baby Sam and Freddie had was obviously not Jason, their first child in all my other oneshots and stories. This chapter, as well as the other two chapters in this saga involving their pregnancy in college, were completely unrelated to the rest of my stories with the couple having kids. **


	416. Chapter 416

_Scattering_

"I can't believe this is happening to me! What have I done to deserve this?"  
"Sam, calm down," Carly said, rolling her eyes as her best friend moaned on her couch. "It's not that big of a deal."

"It's a huge deal!"

"So the cable's out," Carly said, walking over and sitting down next to her. "Who cares?"

"The cable _and _the Wi-Fi," Sam said bitterly.

"Wait…the Wi-Fi's out too?" Carly frowned.

"Now it's a big deal, isn't it?" Sam smirked triumphantly as the front door of the Shay's apartment slammed open.

"The cable's gone!" Freddie announced as him and Gibby stormed in. "_And _the Wi-Fi!"

"I can't live like this!" Gibby said, his voice slightly panicked.

"See, _that's _how you're supposed to react in the middle of a tragedy, Carls," Sam said.

"Wait, your cable and Internet are out too?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah," Carly sighed. "It must be something going on throughout the whole building."

"Aw man," Freddie groaned. "What are we supposed to do now?"

"Yeah, all that's left to do is read a book or something," Gibby shuddered.

Sam threw a pillow at him. "Don't you dare say that!"

"Guys, relax, we're not pathetic losers totally dependent on technology to have fun," Carly said.

"Um…we kind of are," Freddie pointed out.

"Well then you know what?" Carly said. "We're gonna change that. Come on, we're four best friends-"

"Um…let's use that word less loosely," Sam said, looking from Gibby to Freddie.

Freddie rolled his eyes. "Yes, please."

"We _are _four best friends," Carly continued, giving Sam and Freddie warning glances. "And we have the apartment to ourselves. I say we order a pizza, change into our pajamas and sit around and enjoy each other's company."

"How are you supposed to order a pizza with no Internet?" Gibby asked.

"You _can _call, you know," Carly said, pulling out her Pearphone.

"What? No way, shut up!" Gibby grinned. "You mean I can actually _talk _to guys making my pizzas?"

"Yes…" Sam said, giving him a strange look.

"Alright, I have to experience this for myself," Gibby said, snatching Carly's phone from her. "I have a lot to say to these people…"

….

An hour later, the iCarly clan was happily sitting around the coffee table, enjoying their pizza.

"You know," Gibby said, taking a bite out of one of his slices. "I think I like eating my pizza a lot more when I personally know who made it. I just hope everything get's fixed with Mario's health insurance plan."

"See, _this _is why your cat ran away," Sam said, finishing off another box. "He wanted to get away from your rambling!"

Gibby gasped.

"Sam, be nice," Carly sighed.

"She doesn't know the meaning of the word," Freddie said, earning him a punch in the shoulder from Sam.

"Hey, I know what we can do," Carly said excitedly. "Let's play Truth or Dare!"

"Um…are we nine?" Sam frowned.

"Yeah, isn't that game for kids?" Freddie agreed.

"No!" Carly said indignantly. "It' will be fun."

"I'm a little unclear about the rules of Truth or Dare," Gibby said. "At what point do I win?"

"Nobody wins," Carly said. "It's just a game people play to pass the time and have a good time. Trust me, you guys will love it. I'll even go first."

"Fine," Sam sighed, knowing her best friend wouldn't be giving this up anytime soon. "Truth or Dare, Carly?"

"Hmmm…truth," Carly grinned.

"What was the _real _reason you broke up with Bobby Smathers?" Sam asked.

"That boy she dated last month?" Freddie questioned. "For, like, three hours?"

"Yup," Sam nodded. "You said that he had bad breath…but let's hear the _actual _thing."

"He-He did have bad breath," Carly said, blushing.

"Okay," Sam shrugged. "But I know you wouldn't break up with a guy after only three hours because of _that_. Besides, you probably smelt his breath before you asked him out."

"Fine," Carly conceded. "I broke up with Bobby because…because he was too dumb, okay! Him and I were talking after school that day, and in the same sentence, he said he thought buses were just giant sports cars and that milk could be used as a substitute for mouthwash!"

"I guess that would explain the bad breath," Freddie chuckled.

"You broke up with Bobby because he was dumb?" Sam smirked. "Why didn't you just tell us _that_?"

"Because I didn't want you all to think I was shallow," Carly explained.

"But you liked Court even though he was a moron," Sam reminded her. "A very _hot _moron, but-"

"Exactly, court's hotness outweighed his stupidity…at the beginning," Carly said. "Bobby was cute, but not cute enough for me to have to put up with that. Shallow, right?"

"Ummmm…" Sam said playfully.

"You're not shallow, Carls," Freddie said.

"Thank you," Carly said.

"I mean," Freddie continued. "Sometimes it's hard to date someone who thinks that The Declaration of Independence was written by _George W. Bush_." He turned to stare at Sam.

"What's that supposed mean?" Sam snapped.

"Nothing," Freddie said. "Except maybe it would've been nice to have gone out on a date while we were still together and have been able to carry on a conversation that didn't involve _you _thinking dinosaurs went extinct during the American Revolution!"

Sam narrowed her eyes at him, but didn't say anything.

"Well it wound up working out for Bobby," Carly said. "He's dating that new girl now. You know, the one who tried to eat her Fat Cake with the wrapper still on."

"Hey, sometimes you just forget about the wrapper, okay!" Gibby defended.

"Sure," Carly chuckled. "Alright, Gib, it's your turn. Truth or Dare?"

"Truth," Gibby said.

"Ugh, this is why this game is never any fun," Sam said. "Everyone always picks 'truth' and I never get to dare anyone to stick their hand in a-"

"Can we try and keep this game at a family-friendly level, please?" Carly cut her off. She turned back to Gibby. "So while we're on the subject of relationships…What's the grossest thing Tasha has ever done while you two have been together?"

"Are you even still dating Tasha?" Freddie asked.

"Of course," Gibby nodded. "We have Fondue Falafel nights every Wednesday."

"Just answer the question so we can get this game over with," Sam said.

"Hmmm, the _grossest_ thing?" Gibby said thoughtfully. "Oh, I got it! Last week when we went to the movies, Tasha ordered popcorn with the low-sodium butter."

The three teens stared back at him.

"-And?" Carly finally said.

"Oh, that's it," Gibby said. "Pretty gross, right?"

"What's so bad about that?" Sam asked.

"Have you ever _tried _the low-sodium butter?" Gibby cringed. "It's disgusting! Plus it made her hands all oily. Do you have any idea what it's like to try and hold hands with a chick who has oily hands? I had just gotten a manicure!"

"No," Freddie chuckled. "But I _do _know what it's like to try and hold hands with a girl who has bacon grease all over her hands because she couldn't eat the bacon _politely _like a _person_."

Sam said nothing back, but gave him a dark glare.

"Okay, it's Freddie's turn next," Carly said, moving the game along. "Gibby, ask him the question."  
"Truth or Dare?"

"Well I don't want to have to put my hand in anything, so I'm gonna stick with truth," Freddie said.

"What is your favorite type of duck marinade?"

"What?" Freddie frowned.

"Dude, what kind of 'truth' is that?" Carly asked.

"Well I'm curious," Gibby said. "See, I like a nice tangy marinade for my duck, but sometimes I get a little adventurous and try an orange one or maybe one with some ginger and-"

"You're supposed to ask him something like 'what's the most embarrassing that's ever happened to you' or 'what's your biggest secret'," Carly said. "Things like that."

"Fine," Gibby said. "What's your most embarrassing moment?"

"Easy," Freddie laughed. "It was six months ago, back when Sam and I were still dating. I had taken her to a nice restaurant, and we were waiting for our salads to come, but I guess _Sam _couldn't be patient enough, so when she saw our waiter walking around without our food, she reached across the table, picked up a roll, and _pegged _it at the poor guy. The waiter wound up falling back into the fountain, which caused this huge splash and five of the tables wound up soaking wet! It was _humiliating_!"

"Um…well okay then," Carly said. "Sam, it's your turn. Freddie, ask her-"

"I don't want to play anymore," Sam said, getting to her feet.

"What? Why?" Carly asked.

"Because it's a _stupid_ game, and I don't want to sit around here and bore my brains out with it!" Sam snapped. She turned to head upstairs. "Call me when the T.V. comes back!"

"Wow, what's with her?" Gibby asked as Sam stormed upstairs, scattering the empty pizza boxes as she left.

"Who knows?" Freddie shrugged.

"Who knows?" Carly frowned, turning towards Freddie. "_You _should know!"

"Excuse me?"

"Why was everything that came out of your mouth during this whole game about her?" Carly demanded. "All I heard was '_Oh, Sam doesn't know who wrote the Declaration of Independence_, _'Sam had bacon grease on her hands', 'Sam assaulted a waiter with bread_!'"

"What's that have to do with anything?" Freddie asked.

"You were kind of a jerk, you know," Gibby said.

"Dude!"

"All you did was attack her!" Carly said. "And for once, she didn't even do anything to you! So you get upstairs and you apologize to her so that we can all get on with our game!"

"But I-"

"I said go, mister!" Carly said firmly, leaving no room for argument.

"Fine," Freddie sighed, getting up. "This is why we need technology…"

Freddie headed upstairs to the iCarly studio where, as he guessed, Sam was sitting on one of the beanbag chairs.

"Hey," he said, entering the studio. "You realize Carly's never gonna let you hear the end of it if you don't come down and finish her game."

"She'll get over it," Sam shrugged.

Suddenly, Freddie caught sight of her face.

She wasn't crying or anything, but it lacked it's usual spark.

And then it hit him. Gibby was right. He _had _been a jerk down there, and he hadn't even realized it.

"Um, listen," he started. "If anything I said down there made you upset or-"

"Truth or Dare?" Sam said, cutting him off.

"Uh, what?"

"Truth or Dare," she repeated.

"Truth," Freddie responded, slightly confused.

Sam took a deep breath. "Even though we broke up…do you regret that month we dated?"

"No, of-of course not," Freddie said at once. "Why would you think I would've regretted it?"

"Did you _hear _yourself down there?" Sam asked. "All you could talk about was how dumb I was, or how gross I was, or how embarrassing I was to be around."

Freddie sighed. "I didn't mean any of that, Sam."

"You wouldn't have said it if you didn't mean it," Sam said simply. "I'm not going to hurt you about it or anything. I just wanted to know."

"And I told you," Freddie said truthfully. "I don't regret dating you."

"Then why could you only say negative things about it tonight, huh?" Sam demanded.

Freddie looked down at his feet. "Because sometimes that's the only way that I can justify us breaking up."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean…if I only focus on all the good times we had dating, which were most of them…then I just wind up getting depressed," Freddie mumbled. "And I keep asking myself why I let that happen."

Sam didn't reply.

"It sometimes makes it easier to cope, you know," Freddie shrugged.

"Does it work?" Sam whispered.

"Sometimes," Freddie admitted. "But usually not. Because for every rough time we had dating, there were a dozen more great times that I just wind up thinking about."

Sam gave him a small smile. "Yeah…we had fun."

"Yeah," Freddie agreed. "We did…Look, um, I'm really sorry if I made you feel upset tonight. Even if you don't know who wrote the Declaration of Independence or you got bacon grease on your hands or you threw a roll at our waiter…you were the best girlfriend I ever had."

"You've only dated like, three girls in your nubby life," Sam smirked.

"Rub it in, will you?" Freddie chuckled.

"Yeah, well, it's not like I've had that many guys to compare _you _with," Sam said. "But out of my three…you were probably the best too."

Freddie grinned. "Well thanks."

"Don't let that go to your head though," Sam said.

The two were silent for a few moments.

"You remember what we said when we broke up?" Freddie said softly. "About giving us another try some day?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "I do."

"Do you think we'll ever get back together someday then?" Freddie asked.

Sam gave a small laugh. "Yeah…someday, I think we will. Do you?"

"I don't think it," Freddie said. "I know it."

"Well then what are we supposed to do in the meantime?" Sam asked.

Freddie scooted closer to her. "I think what hurt us the first time around was that we both tried to make our relationship something it could never be. I tried to make you more normal-"

"-And I tried to make you more abnormal," Sam said. "Yeah…that didn't work out too well."

"No, not really," Freddie said.

"We tried to mirror Carly's relationships," Sam commented. "Instead of creating our own. You and I weren't a normal couple. But we were a good one."

"Definitely."

"Maybe we should've just been more of ourselves," Sam said.

"Maybe," Freddie said sadly.

"Well," Sam said, looking at him. "Whenever we _do _decide to get back together…at least we'll know what to do different this time."

"Yeah," Freddie said. He looked down at his lap. "I still love you."

Sam looked into his eyes. "I still love you too."


	417. Chapter 417

_Stumbling _

Sam cringed as she heard a loud crash coming from her kitchen.

"That's it!" Sam yelled, leaving the stain on the carpet she had been trying to scrub out and heading into the kitchen, where her three children were running around screaming. "Everyone's going to time-out! What did you break?"

"It was an accident," three-year old Ashton said as Sam spotted several broken plates on the floor.

"Emma and Ashton did it," seven-year old Jason said. "I just tried to stop them."

"Sure you did," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "And Emma, _what _is all over you?"

"Chocolate syrup!" Emma said happily, licking the corners of her mouth as she smeared more of the gooey liquid on her new, white shirt.

"Emma!" Sam groaned. "Why would you dump half a bottle of chocolate syrup all over you?"

"I was hungry."

"She's dirty, mommy," Ashton announced.

"Yes, I can _see _that," Sam said, trying to keep her patience. "Okay, Emma, let's go get you in the tub, and Jason and Ashton, you two just-"

"Let's play tag!" Jason yelled suddenly.

"No!" Sam said. "No one's playing-"

"Yay! Tag!" the twins exclaimed, jumping up and down.

"I'm it!" Emma said. "I'm gonna catch you!"

"Ahhhhh!" Ashton shrieked, running out of the kitchen, knocking over the pitcher of iced tea that had been sitting on the table.

"Hey!" Sam yelled as Emma and Jason ran after her. "Hey! No running in the-Ugh!"

She looked around at the mess in the kitchen.

"Just _had _to have kids, didn't I?" Sam said, shaking her head.

She heard a car in the driveway, and she looked out the window, relieved to see her husband's car pulling in.

"Finally," Sam breathed.

The front door of the Benson's house opened and Freddie walked in, still in his work clothes.

"Daddy!" the three kids shouted, stopping their game and running towards him, nearly knocking him over.

"Hey guys," Freddie smiled. "I could hear you all the second I turned onto the street."

"Yeah, they've been real loud today," Sam mumbled as she walked over to Freddie, giving him a quick kiss. "And hyper and rowdy and insane and-"

"Er, Emma?" Freddie frowned, noticing a huge chocolate stain on his shirt from the spot his daughter had just hugged him. "Why are you all sticky."

"I wanted to eat all the chocolate syrup, so I dumped it on my head!" Emma said proudly.

"Oh…" Freddie said, looking around the living room, where tiny, chocolate-covered footprints could be seen.

"Yeah, this is what I've been dealing with all day," Sam sighed, picking Emma up, not even caring about the chocolate that now covered her own clothes. "I'm gonna go give her a bath. Can you keep an eye on the other two?"

"Alright," Freddie nodded as Sam headed back towards the bathroom.

"Daddy, I'm making a picture!" Ashton said, grabbing Freddie's hand and pulling him to the coffee table.

"Oh really?" Freddie said.

"Look!" Ashton said, thrusting a large sheet of construction paper into hands.

A shower of glitter fell onto Freddie's lap and onto the carpet.

"Ashton," Freddie sighed. "You know you're only supposed to use glitter if mommy or daddy is working with you. Now you made a mess."

"You don't like my picture, daddy?" Ashton pouted, tears forming in the corners of her eyes.

"What? Yes! Of course I do, sweetie," Freddie said quickly. "I was just saying that _next _time-"

"Hey dad, look!" Jason said, running over to his father, carrying Freddie's beloved miniature replica of a Proton Cruiser from _Galaxy Wars_.

"Jason!" Freddie exclaimed. "Is that my Proton Cruiser? You know you aren't supposed to touch any of my _Galaxy Wars _stuff from that shelf in my office!"

"But look," Jason said. "I figured out how to make it-whoa!"

Jason had stumbled over one of the twins' shoes lying in the middle of the floor, letting go of the Proton Cruiser in the process, sending it crashing to the floor.

"You broke daddy's toy!" Ashton gasped. "You're in trouble!"

"Er, sorry dad," Jason said.

"I-I-" Freddie stammered, looking at the remains of his beloved prop.

"What _else _broke out here?" Sam asked, returning to the room, her entire upper-body dripping wet from giving a squirming three-year old a bath.

"Daddy's toy," Ashton said.

"Oh," Sam shrugged. "I mean…how sad."

"Yeah, wait until they break something of _yours_," Freddie mumbled darkly.

"Way ahead of you, baby," Sam said, pulling out her Pearphone that now had a cracked screen. "They took care of this during lunch."

"Guess we're even then," Freddie said.

"Um, do I even want to know why you are covered in pink glitter?" Sam frowned.

"Nope," Freddie said. "No, you do not."

…

The next morning, when Freddie's alarm went off, he buried his face in his pillow, too tired to move.

"How can it be morning already?" he moaned, turning off the alarm as he slowly sat up. "I feel like I just laid down, don't you? Sam?"

He looked over at his wife's side of the bed only to find it empty.

Before he even had a chance to wonder where she was, though, he heard a loud gagging sound coming from the bathroom.

"Sam?" he called, getting out of bed. "You okay?"

"No," Sam mumbled as he poked his head into the bathroom to see her kneeling by the toilet. "I think I'm sick. I must've caught a stomach virus or something, I just threw up."

Freddie silently cursed. A sick Sam meant he was going to have to handle the three kids on his own today. He didn't want to seem insensitive, but he really needed her.

"Want me to get you anything?" Freddie asked.

"No," Sam said, wiping her mouth. "I'll feel better after I shower…I'm already starting to feel better."

"Kids get to you yesterday?" Freddie asked knowingly.

"They're nightmares," Sam said. "I love them and everything, but they're-"

"I know," Freddie said. "But no one ever said three kids under the age of eight would be easy."

"Nope," Sam agreed. "But speaking of the kids, they're probably up and running around already. Can you go start breakfast while I get ready?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded, helping her to her feet. "Though I'm a little afraid to see what's waiting for me out there…"

Sam waited until Freddie closed the door behind her before she walked over to the medicine cabinet and pulled out the small package she had bought the day before.

This wasn't the first morning she woke up sick; Freddie was just usually already downstairs by the time she would come rushing into the bathroom.

She looked down at the pregnancy test in her hands, taking a deep breath. She didn't even want to know what she was going to do if it wound up being positive. Her and Freddie were already at their rope's end with three kids…how could they expect to survive a fourth?

…

"Well, congratulations, Mrs. Benson," the doctor said later that day as Sam stared at the monitor by her bedside. "It looks like you're a little over six weeks pregnant."

"You-You're sure?" Sam asked slowly.

"Very," the doctor nodded.

"Oh," Sam said, feeling completely dazed. "Oh."

After taking the pregnancy test that morning and having it show up positive, Sam decided to get professional confirmation.

"Everything looks very good here," the doctor continued, continuing to look at the ultrasound. "All you need to do is start taking the prenatal vitamins I'll prescribe to you in a moment and get plenty of rest."

"Yeah…rest isn't really something I can get a whole lot of right now," Sam said.

"Well just try and take it as easy as possible," the doctor told her. "But of course, I'm talking to an old pro at this, aren't I? You've been through this before with your other three kids. You know exactly what to expect."

"Uh-huh," Sam nodded, still staring at the monitor.

"I'll go get you that prescription," the doctor smiled. "And some pictures from the ultrasound. I'm sure you're very excited and can't wait to start telling everyone the great news."

….

Sam returned home shortly after, the news she had just received still circling around in her mind.  
She couldn't believe she was pregnant _again_. How were her and Freddie going to handle four children in the house?

She walked through her front door, where Carly was so busy chasing around the twins she didn't even notice her come in.

"Emma! Or are you Ashton?" Carly said, slightly out of breath. "Well, whoever you are, you can't play with your mom's lipstick like that! She's gonna flip out! You better hope I can get this all cleaned up before she comes home and-"

"Relax, Carls," Sam said, causing her best friend to spin around in surprise. "I've seen worse."  
"Oh thank God you're back," Carly breathed. "I mean…they were a _delight_ while you were gone."

"Yeah, sure," Sam scoffed.

"Mom, can I go try and find fossils in the backyard?" Jason asked, running into the room with a shovel.

"Whatever," Sam sighed.

"Um, didn't you guys just plant a bunch of expensive plants out there?" Carly frowned as Jason ran outside.

"I don't even care," Sam said. "If it will keep him busy for an hour…"

"You okay?" Carly asked.

"Huh? Yeah, I'm fine," Sam nodded. "Why?"

"You just look a little tired and out of it," Carly shrugged.

Sam laughed. "Carly, Carly, Carly…You have _one _kid. Trust me, this is the normal look when you have three."

"Ah," Carly nodded understandingly. "Well, I should get going. If you need to babysit again, give me a week to recover and I'll be here."

"Thanks," Sam grinned.

As Carly left, Sam's focus wandered back to that fourth child growing inside of her.

Obviously, her and Freddie loved their children more than anything else in the world; that was never a question. Despite how destructive and rambunctious they could be, they were still their kids.

But her and Freddie hadn't discussed having a _fourth _child. They certainly hadn't been planning on having one _now_. If they ever were going to try for another child, Sam figured they'd at least wait until the twins were in second or third grade.

But now they didn't have a chance to plan. They were having another baby whether they were ready or not.

Sam looked down at her flat stomach, placing a hand where she knew the baby rested.

"I love you, you know," Sam whispered. "Even if you act as crazy and out-of-control as your brother and sisters.

….

"Well," Freddie said bitterly, slamming the front door of the house closed later that night as he tossed his briefcase aside. "_That _was a bad day."

"What happened, baby?" Sam asked, turning off her T.V. show.

Freddie came home late a few nights a week, this being one of them, so the kids were already asleep.

"You know how I had that huge presentation today?" Freddie sighed.

"Yeah," Sam nodded.

"Well, about half-an-hour before I had to give it in front of all my bosses," Freddie said irritably. "I go to upload it from my USB onto the server, and guess what I find?  
"What?"

"One of the kids must've decided it would be fun to decorate my USB," Freddie said, pulling the small device out of his pocket and tossing it to Sam.

Sam looked down and saw the USB was covered with stickers, dry glue, and paint.

"Oh…" Sam said. "Did-Did it still work?"

"Barely!" Freddie said. "Luckily I was able to get my presentation off of it, but I wound up being five minutes late to my meeting and my bosses were pissed!"

"I'm sorry," Sam said, rubbing his shoulder. "I'll talk to the kids about not touching your stuff…again."

"These kids are going to give me gray hair before I turn forty," Freddie mumbled. "I can't wait until they're out of this stage of destroying everything they put their hands on."

Sam frowned. "Come on…they don't destroy _everything_."

"No?" Freddie said. "In the last twenty-four hours, your phone wound up cracked, my Proton Cruiser replica was smashed to smithereens, the bathroom wall looks like a box of crayons threw up on it, our rug has a giant grape juice stain on it, and now my USB is ruined."

"Yeah…" Sam said slowly. "But, they didn't mean to do any of that. They're just kids."

"I know," Freddie sighed. "Still, though, I don't know how three kids can be so much work."

Sam didn't say anything. Freddie wasn't exactly setting her up for the perfect moment for her to tell him that she was pregnant.

"I mean, I thought the kids were supposed to get _easier _as they got older," Freddie continued. "But it looks like ours are doing the complete opposite."

Sam looked down at her lap. _He's going to flip out when I tell him_, Sam thought sadly. _He's not going to be thrilled like when I told him I was pregnant with Jason or the twins…_

"Sam?" Freddie said, looking over at his wife. "Sam, you okay?"

"Fine," Sam mumbled, quickly getting to her feet. "Just tired. I'm going to bed."

"Wait, Sam-" Freddie started, but Sam had already made her way up the steps.

She went into her and Freddie's bedroom and lay down on their bed, burying her face in her pillow.

She didn't know how she was going to tell Freddie the news now…He was already at his capacity with three kids. He seemed dead set against adding any more to the equation.

Perhaps it was the exhaustion of finding out about the pregnancy, or the pregnancy itself, but Sam felt her eyelids grow heavy soon after she hit the pillow. She was passed out by the Freddie came up a few moments later to talk to her.

….

The next morning, Sam slowly opened her eyes, feeling the weight of yesterday still pressing on her. She made to sit up, but the second she shifted, her husband next to her jolted up as well.

"Good, you're up," he yawned.

"Did I wake you?" Sam mumbled.

"No," Freddie said. "I couldn't really sleep…Baby, what was bothering you last night? I came up after you but you were already asleep by the time I got up here."

Sam didn't respond.

"Come on, you can talk to me," Freddie smiled, taking her hand. "We _have _been married for eight years."

Sam took a deep breath, looking right into his eyes. "Okay," she said. "But first, just…just promise me you'll try not to get mad, okay?"

Freddie frowned. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah," Sam sighed.

"Are the kids okay?" Freddie asked.

"Yes, yes, they're fine," Sam said quickly.

"Then what is it?" Freddie asked.

Sam gripped his hand tightly. "Freddie, I'm pregnant."

Freddie's eyes widened. "Wh-What?"

"I'm pregnant," Sam said again. She looked down at her lap. "We're going to have four kids."

Freddie continued to stare at her, not saying a word.

"I found out yesterday," Sam continued. "I took a pregnancy test…and then I went to the doctor's. That's why I was sick yesterday morning. I've been getting morning sickness for the past couple of weeks, but I thought I was just catching something."

Still, Freddie simply stared at her, flabbergasted.

Sam reached over to the drawer of her bedside table and pulled out the picture from her ultrasound the previous day.

"Here," she said, handing it to Freddie. "That's our baby…You know during the first visit, the baby doesn't look like a baby, just like a little peanut, but there it is…"

Freddie took the picture, staring hard at it.

Finally, Sam lost her patience. "Okay, can you _say _something?"

"You-We're really going to have another baby?" Freddie said, his voice shaky.

"Uh-huh," Sam whispered. "I-I know we hadn't planned on having another kid, but, um, I guess it just happened."

"Yeah," Freddie said softly.

"You're mad," Sam said quietly. "Aren't you?"

"What?" Freddie said, finally snapping out of his daze. "No! Sam, of course I'm not mad, why would you think that?"

"Because," Sam sighed. "Last night you were going on about how we're barely handling the kids now and how into everything they've been lately, and now I'm telling you that we're adding a fourth kid to that, and-"

"I didn't mean-Come here," Freddie said, wrapping his arms around Sam, kissing her. "I didn't mean it like that. I was just stressed from my meeting. Look, we both know that Jason and Emma and Ashton are a handful. But they're our kids, and they're pretty amazing, aren't they? They may destroy our house, give us practically no time to ourselves and never let us sleep in past nine, but they're three of the best things that have happened to us in our lives. And they _do _do more than just drive us crazy. Jason makes us all though books about dinosaurs or space or, my personal favorite, _Galaxy Wars_."

"Yeah," Sam grinned. "Try not to nub up this kid, okay?"

"And the twins have been so cute putting on those little plays for us during dinner lately," Freddie said.

"They have," Sam agreed.

"So we'll have one more Crazy Benson to add to our group," Freddie said. "We'll manage. I just hope that poor baby is ready for the family waiting for him or her."

"So you're really excited?" Sam asked.

"I am," Freddie said earnestly. "We've been so lucky to have three children together, I can't wait for the fourth."

Sam beamed up at him. "I can't wait either."

Just then the door of the couple's bedroom burst open and the three Benson children came rushing in.

"Wake up!" Emma said happily, bouncing onto the bed into her father's lap.

"Aw, five more minutes?" Freddie joked, kissing the top of his daughter's blonde head.

"We made you guys breakfast because you were taking so long," Jason said, setting a tray down on his parents' bread with very burnt toast and at least half-a-cup of butter.

"I made the toast!" Ashton said proudly.

"Wow, this looks…delicious," Sam said, trying not to gag on the smell. "Thanks so much, you guys."

"Yeah, your mom and I can't wait to eat this later," Freddie said. He looked over at his wife, his eyes sparkling. "And while you guys are here…mommy and daddy have some exciting news."

"You do?" Jason asked. "What is it?"

Sam took Ashton into her lap and put her arm around Jason. "Well you guys, it looks like you three are going to get a new baby brother or sister soon."

The three kids gasped.

"Another baby!" Ashton exclaimed. "Where is it?"

"It's growing inside of me," Sam explained, rubbing her stomach. "Just like you all did."

"Ick," Emma cringed. "Did you eat it?"

"No," Sam said, smacking Freddie's shoulder as he laughed. "All babies grow inside their mom's stomachs."

"Really?" Emma said in disbelief.

"Really," Sam nodded. "Jason, you remember when I was pregnant with the twins, right? You remember how they grew in there, right?"

"Yeah, you got really fat, mom," Jason said.

"Gee, thanks," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"But how did this baby get in there?" Jason asked.

"Um…" Freddie said slowly. "What-What do you mean?"

"How do babies get inside a mom's stomach if that's where they all grow?" Jason asked curiously.

"Yeah, how do they?" Ashton asked.

"Yeah, if mommy didn't eat the baby, how could it be in her tummy?" Emma questioned.

"I, well, um-" Freddie stammered. "See, that's actually a complicated process that we'll discuss when you're _much _older. Right Sam?"

"Well, I'm gonna go shower," Sam said, getting to her feet. She gave Freddie one last kiss. "Have fun with them, baby."

"What? Hey! Don't leave me with their questions!" Freddie said as Sam headed off into the bathroom. "Sam! Sam, come back here!"


	418. Chapter 418

_Fever_

"Alright, you two, if you could tear lips away from each others for two seconds, that would be _fantastic_!" Carly said loudly, slamming the door closed as she stormed into her apartment. "I have a real problem here!"

"We weren't even kissing," Freddie frowned, looking up from his Pearbook on the sofa while Sam was in the kitchen, making herself a snack.

"Sorry, force of habit," Carly said.

"What's your big problem, kid?" Sam asked.

"Well, I met a guy," Carly sighed.

"Tragic," Sam smirked, sitting down next to her boyfriend.

"I met him down at the Groovy Smoothie," Carly explained. "And he was _so _cute. So I 'accidently' dropped by book bag next to his table while I was walking by, and we actually got to talking. His name is Deke and he goes to Briarwood."

"Fancy," Freddie commented.

"I know," Carly said dreamily. "But he just kept going on and on about all these great accomplishments he has. He got a perfect score on his SAT's, he speaks three languages, he plays the trombone and clarinet, he's a male model _and_ a competitive figure skater!"

"Nice," Sam said approvingly. "Way to go, Carly."

"No, not way to go Carly!" Carly snapped. "Because I blew any chance of a relationship with him!"

"How?" Freddie questioned.

"Well," Carly said heavily. "All this time when he was listing off everything he's ever done, I was just sitting there realizing how _little _I've done!"

"Um, I didn't realize staring in a web show that gets over a million views a week was nothing," Sam pointed out.

"Please, like Deke would've had time to have ever watched an episode of iCarly," Carly scoffed. "He's too busy for the Internet!"

"I still don't understand how you ruined your chance for a relationship with him," Freddie said.

"Well, see, I, um, _may _have told him something a little untrue about me to make me seem more…successful," Carly said.

"What'd you tell him?" Sam grinned.

Carly mumbled something under her breath.

"What?" Freddie said. "We didn't hear what you-"

"I told him I was a competitive figure skater too, okay?" Carly exclaimed.

Sam and Freddie both looked at each other and then burst out laughing.

"It's not funny!"

"_Why _would you tell this guy you are a competitive figure skater?" Freddie chuckled.

"I don't know, I freaked!" Carly defended. "He was just sitting there all beautiful and talented!"

"Okay, okay, so you made up some story about you being a figure skater," Sam said. "That's not the _worst _thing that could've happened. So long as he never actually sees you skate, there's no problem."

"Yeah…" Carly said lamely. "About that…The two of us sort of have a date this weekend at the ice rink."

Sam and Freddie burst out laughing again.

"Will you two stop doing that?"

"Well, I can't help you there, Carls," Sam said. "So should I get the cookie dough ready for our boy-hating party that's sure to be coming up soon?"

"Gee, thanks for the support," Carly said.

"Sorry," Freddie said, still smiling. "But I don't exactly know how to help you on this one either, Carls, other than to tell you to just tell the guy the truth about you lying and hope for the best."

"That chiz never works," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"I was _trying _to be positive, Sam," Freddie sighed.

"She's right," Carly said.

"Ha!" Sam cheered triumphantly.

"Which is why-" Carly said.

"Oh-no," Freddie frowned.

"-The three of us are going to the ice rink tomorrow morning at six!"

"The ice rink?" Freddie repeated.

"Six in the _morning_?" Sam exclaimed.

"Well maybe I can learn a few tricks and jumps tomorrow so during my date, I don't look like a complete fool," Carly reasoned.

"Carly, you can't even take two steps on the ice without falling down," Sam said, shaking her head.

"Eh, I'll learn," Carly shrugged. "How hard can it be?"

…..

"Okay, this is hard," Carly cringed as she fell onto the ice for the tenth time the next morning.

"Are you okay?" Freddie yawned. Him and Sam hadn't even put their skates on yet; they were standing by the rink as they watched their best friend.

"Yeah," Carly said, wiping off the shades of ice from her jacket. "I can't believe all those skaters on T.V. make this look so easy. I'm never gonna get the hang of this."

"Well, um, I think you lasted _ten _seconds this time until you fell," Freddie offered helpfully. "Right, Sam? Sam?"

He gently elbowed his girlfriend in the ribs, waking her up as she began to doze off.

"What?" she moaned. "It's six in the morning…I didn't even know they _had _a six in the morning. I should still be in bed."

"Sam," Carly sighed. "I-I know you're really tired and everything, but…I need you! I've seen you skate, and you're so good! You know how to do all those jumps and twirls and everything!"

"I didn't know you could skate," Freddie commented.

"Only when I'm _awake_," Sam mumbled. "And Carly, no offense or anything, but you're _very _far away from being able to do any tricks out on the ice."

"Wait, how long have you been able to skate?" Freddie asked.

"Since you were four, right?" Carly replied.

"Yeah," Sam said, rubbing her eyes sleepily.

"You never told me that," Freddie said.

"Well I don't anymore," Sam explained. "Remember when I was twelve and I broke my ankle? I had to stop skating after that. But I _was_ good…"

"You were awesome," Carly said. "And you still are! You totally remember how to do all your old moves and everything! You got first in almost every competition you skated in!"

"Why haven't _I _ever gotten to see you skate?" Freddie asked. "I'm the boyfriend!"

"And how many times have we invited you to come skating with us when Spencer takes us here?" Sam pointed out. "It's not my fault your mom thinks you'll get a rash from the rental skates."

"Okay, I know I'm never going to learn how to do all those cool tricks you know how to do," Carly said to Sam. "But can't you at least _please _teach me to skate around for more than ten seconds without falling so I don't look like a _complete _idiot on my date?"

"You want me to _move _before the sun's even up?" Sam groaned.

"Please?" Carly said, giving her best friend a pleading look.

"Ugh! Fine!" Sam conceded. "I'll skate!"

"Yes!" Freddie cheered.

"Why are you so happy, nub?" Sam demanded.

"I'm already ahead of all those AV guys by just _having _a girlfriend," Freddie grinned, pulling out his phone and turning on the video camera. "Now I'm on a whole different level then him because you can also skate!"

"You videotape this and you'll wind up with a wedgie so painful you won't be able to even cry," Sam said, thumping the back of his head as she started to put her skates on.

"Okay, no camera," Freddie said quickly, putting his phone away.

"You're the best!" Carly said to Sam. "I swear, when me and Deke have our first child together, you're totally gonna be the godmother!"

"Let's just finish up so I can go back to bed," Sam said as the two girls stepped out onto the ice.

Freddie leaned against the wall of the rink, watching as his girlfriend took a few effortless glides on the ice as Carly tried to find her balance.

She really seemed at home on the ice, with her long, blonde hair flying behind her as she skated around. She did a small spin before skating back to Carly.

"Okay, let's see what you got," Sam said. "Just try and move your feet without worrying about falling down."

"Oh, is that all I have to do?" Carly snapped as she almost fell backwards.

"Don't shuffle your feet," Sam told her. "Move them out like _this_. It helps your balance."

"Okay…" Carly said slowly, correcting her feet. "Hey, that _does _help."

"Yeah, and don't look down at your feet," Sam told her. "Look _up_, or your gonna wind up crashing into people."

"Wow, I'm doing it!" Carly exclaimed, moving along slowly, yet steadily. "Holy chiz, I can skate! I can-whoa!"

She suddenly tripped and landed flat on the ice.

"You were saying?" Sam smirked, helping her friend up.

"Guess I got too carried away there, huh?"

"You did better," Sam reasoned. She turned to look back at her boyfriend. "Fredwad, how long did she stay up this time?"

"Huh? Oh, um…" Truthfully, he had not been watching Carly at all. His focus had been solely on Sam. "Probably about a minute."

"A minute?" Carly repeated excitedly.

"Nice," Sam said, high-fiving her. "You ready to try again?"

"Yeah, just give me a minute to go try and get the ice shavings out of my pants," Carly winced as she headed over to exit the rink.

As Carly went off towards the restrooms, Sam took the opportunity to skate around some more, making one impressive jump before skating back over to Freddie.

"Wow," Freddie said, astounded as Sam met him at the wall. "You _are _really good. You're-You're-"

"Thanks," Sam laughed, rolling her eyes.

"So you used to actually compete in skating?" Freddie asked. "Up until you were twelve? I _knew _you when you were twelve!"

"Yeah, and notice I didn't hang around Carly's apartment after school everyday like I do now," Sam pointed out. "After school I would come here and practice for a million hours a day."

"Did you like it?"

"Well yeah, I didn't have too much I was good at, so it was nice to be the star of something," Sam shrugged. "And I liked beating people and seeing them cry when I took first place away from them."

"Of course," Freddie chuckled.

"When I was little, I used to think I would go to the Olympics or something some day," Sam said. "But then I broke that ankle, and well…"

"You could've wound up in the Olympics, baby," Freddie said supportively.

Sam gave him a small smile. "Nah, I don't think I would've really liked it. Skating was fun and all, but I don't know if I was ever ready to give it that much dedication. Besides, if I had kept up with skating, I would've never had time for iCarly, and then we wouldn't have become frienimies, and then best friends, and then boyfriend and girlfriend."

"Well then I'm very happy you broke your ankle," Freddie said playfully, leaning over the wall to kiss her.

"Thanks," Sam blushed. She cleared her throat. "So nub…you gonna give the ice a chance?"

"You want _me _to skate?" Freddie scoffed. "Yeah, right."

"Come on, you can't be worse than Carly," Sam pointed out. "Because let's face it, she's better off calling that Deke guy and telling him she's sick with a fever or something this weekend."

"You realize if I come home covered in ice and bruises my mom's gonna hate you," Freddie said, though putting on his skates anyway.

"She already hates me," Sam shrugged. "So what harm can it do?"

"Good point," Freddie said, slowly stepping onto the ice. "Um…I've never done this before."

"Would you like me to hold you hand?" Sam grinned.

"Yes please."

"See, it's not that bad," Sam said as the couple skated around the rink. "You're not gonna get an ice rash or whatever it is your mom's worried about."

"Ha, ha," Freddie said dryly. He turned his head to look at Sam. "Hey, why don't you show me your favorite trick?"

"You really want to see that?" Sam asked.

"Of course."

"Okay," Sam shrugged. "I used to be really good at it, but I'm probably a little rusty. This jump used to always win me any competition I was in."

As she skated off, Freddie simply marveled at the sight of her.

This was one of the things he loved the most about her. She could be one of the loudest, most aggressive people he knew, but she was also _the_ most graceful, artistic…_perfect_ girl he knew too. And only he got to see this side of her.

She'd give any guy a double-fist dance straight to the face, but there were so few people who'd she skate around with holding hands, and he was one of them, and that was one of the best feelings he could fathom.


	419. Chapter 419

_Publishing_

"Do we really have to do this?" Sam moaned as her and Freddie walked into the lobby of Bushwell Plaza. "Can't we just send her a postcard or something?"

"Sam, it's my mom," Freddie said. "We have to tell her in person. It'll be fine, trust me."

"Freddie, she doesn't like me," Sam sighed. "She's not going to be 'fine' with us getting married."

"She will, I promise, baby," Freddie assured her. "Look, we've been engaged for over a month without telling her. Carly's going to start pushing us to send out our wedding invitations soon now, so we pretty much _have _to tell her."  
"She'll figure it out when she gets her invitation then."

"Yeah, and then she'll probably pass out from shock," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "That's no better than your first idea of just publishing the announcement on the cover of her _Aggressive Parenting _magazine! Come on, we're both adults, we're in love, we're getting married. It's simple. She'll realize that this is just the next step for us."

"But she doesn't even know we've been living together for the past year," Sam pointed out.

"Yeah, and, um, it's probably best to leave that out," Freddie said. "But I think she'll be happy for us."

"I dunno," Sam said. "We could always turn around now and go out for a couple of steaks."

"We can get dinner after we tell my mom," Freddie said. "And who knows, maybe she'll be so excited for us she'll want to tag along and join us!"

"Now you're just being naïve," Sam said.

"It'll be fine," Freddie said again, leaning down to give her a kiss. "Trust me."

The couple took the elevator up to the eighth floor and walked down the hall to apartment 8D.

"Last chance to run," Sam said as Freddie knocked.

"Sam…" Freddie said warningly as the door opened up.

"Freddie!" Marissa exclaimed, throwing her arms around her son, nearly knocking him to the ground. "Oh, I've missed you so much! I haven't seen you in _ages_."

"We got lunch last week mom, remember?" Freddie smiled as they pulled apart.

"Yes, that's when I realized I, your mother who carried you for eleven months, had been reduced to nothing more than a weekly obligation," Marissa snipped. She then noticed Sam standing awkwardly behind Freddie.

"Oh," she said, he smile dropping. "You brought _Samantha_. How lovely."

"Yeah mom," Freddie said brightly, taking Sam's hand, clearly missing his mother's tone. "I thought it would be nice for the three of us to hang out this afternoon. Me and Sam have some pretty big news to tell you. Right, Sam?"

"Er, right," Sam nodded. "Hi, Mrs. Benson."

"Samantha," Marissa greeted her simply as the couple entered the apartment. "Shoes off!"

"I can already feel her excitement," Sam mumbled under her breath.

"So mom, how's work at the hospital been?" Freddie asked, sitting down on the plastic-covered sofa.

"I've seen _eight _cases of head lice this past week," Marissa said, shaking her head. "There must be an outbreak in Seattle. Freddie, before you leave today, I'm going to scrub you head with a special shampoo I got from Protectivepoos . com!"

"Um…no thanks, mom," Freddie said as Sam tried not to laugh about the name of the website. "I actually just washed my hair this morning."

Marissa gasped. "What _happened _to you, Freddie? You never used to defy me like this! But we know who did this to you, isn't that right, _Samantha_?"

"Fine, fine, I'll use the special shampoo!" Freddie said quickly before a fight could break out between his mom and fiancé. "Anyway, like I said earlier, Sam and I have some really big news to tell you."

"Are you moving back into your own room?" Marissa gasped excitedly. "Oh, Freddie! I can't _wait _to have you-"

"No, mom," Freddie said, trying hard not to roll his eyes. "That's not what I was going to tell you at all."

He took Sam's hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "Mom," he began. "Sam and I are going to get married. We're engaged!"  
Marissa nearly dropped the cup of tea in her hand.

"You-You-You're _what_?"

"We're getting married," Freddie repeated. "Isn't that exciting? We just picked a date for the wedding last night, actually. It's going to be on October fifteenth, probably in the afternoon. We're thinking of having it at the Parker-Nichols hotel, or maybe somewhere a little more fancy. We're not sure about that yet, but we have time to-"

"You two can't get _married_!" Marissa exclaimed, cutting her son off.

Freddie frowned. "Um…yes we can."

"No, you can't marry her, Freddie!" Marissa cried, apparently forgetting that Sam was still in the room.

"Mom, I love Sam," Freddie said firmly. "So I _am _going to marry her."

"Did she pressure you into this?" Marissa demanded. "You just got that big promotion at work, who's to say she doesn't just want to marry you for all the money you'll be earning?"

Sam looked down at her lap. Even _she _hadn't expected Marissa to react this way.

"That's not even _close _to true!" Freddie snapped, his voice raising. "Sam didn't pressure me into anything. _I _proposed to _her_! It had nothing to do with me getting a promotion! We're getting married because we're in love, and that's that!"

"Don't you see how much she's changed you?" Marissa said. "You never used to raise your voice to me! She's nothing but bad news for you, Freddie. If you marry her she's just going to ruin you even more!"

That was all Sam could take.

Without a word, she quickly got up off the couch and rushed to the door. Freddie could see she had tears forming in the corners of her eyes.

"Sam, wait-" Freddie started, but the door had already slammed shut. He turned back to his mother. "Look what you did!"

"Freddie, as your mother, I have to put my foot down when I see you making rash decisions about-"

"Marrying Sam isn't a rash decision!" Freddie yelled. "I've wanted to marry her for years! But I waited until we both finished college and got settled in our jobs! I spent weeks finding her the perfect engagement ring and planning the perfect way to ask her to marry me! When she said yes, I had never been happier!"

"But Freddie," Marissa sighed. "She's-She's a hoodlum!"

"She's perfect," Freddie said firmly. "She's not the same girl who used to get arrested every other weekend back when we were thirteen. She grew up. Sure, she still has a spark in her, but that's what I _love_. She has a great job at a television studio and she hasn't gotten arrested _once _in the past ten years."

"Yes, but-"

"Sam's the love of my life," Freddie said. "And I _am _going to marry her. Nothing you say or do is going to stop that. If you choose not to accept that, then, well, I guess you can choose not to come to our wedding or-or be involved in our lives anymore."  
"Freddie!" Marissa gasped. "I'm your _mother_!"

"And Sam's going to be my wife," Freddie said. "I love you, mom, but I'm marrying Sam. I hope you decide to accept that, I really do. But I don't need your approval about who I choose to spend the rest of my life with."

He turned to leave the apartment and find Sam, but before he did, he turned and looked over his shoulder.

"You know, Sam was afraid to even tell you we were engaged," he said. "But I told her that you'd put aside your differences with her and just be happy for us. Looks like I was wrong."

He turned back to the door, but his mother suddenly spoke.

"Wait, Freddie…" she sighed.

"Yes?"

"Are you absolutely _certain _that you love Samantha?" Marissa asked, her voice defeated.

"More certain than I've been about anything in my life," Freddie nodded.

"And nothing I say will ever change that, will it?" Marissa questioned.

Freddie shook his head. "No. It won't."

Marissa pursed her lips and put her hands on her hips. "Will you please bring her back here then?"

"Are you going to verbally assault her again?" Freddie asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No," Marissa sighed. "If this is how it's going to be…then I _suppose _I should get to know my future daughter-in-law a little bit better."

Freddie gave her a small smile. "Thanks mom."

…

Freddie found Sam in the lobby of the building, leaning against a wall in a hidden corner.

"Can we go now?" Sam asked when Freddie approached her, her voice shaky. "I told you your mom wasn't going to be happy. She clearly hates me and thinks I'm no good for her precious son."

"She was wrong to say those things, baby," Freddie said gently, pulling her into his embrace. "And I'm sorry she did. You're perfect for me. You know that, right?"

"Let's just go," Sam sniffed.

"Sam," Freddie said, hugging her tightly. "I-I talked to her. I told her that if she couldn't learn to accept the fact that we were getting married, then she wasn't going to be involved in our lives anymore. Simple as that."

"You said that to her?" Sam said softly, looking up at him.

"Yes," Freddie replied. "I did."

"I don't want you to cut your mom out of your life for me," Sam mumbled.

"I don't want her to make you feel like she did just now either," Freddie said. "But…after I said that, she agreed to talk to you."

Sam frowned. "What? You want me to go back up there?"

"It's your choice," Freddie said. "If you want to go now, we can go. But I do think she really wants to apologize to you."

Sam sighed. "You're killing me here, Benson."

"So what do you want to do?"

Sam bit the corner of her lip. "Fine," she finally said. "But if she starts any of that again, I'm leaving."

"And I'll be right behind you," Freddie agreed. He took her hand. "Come on, let's go see her."

The couple went back up to the eighth floor. Freddie gave Sam one quick kiss before opening up the door of his mother's apartment again.

"Okay, mom," Freddie said. "Here's Sam. You wanted to say something to her?"

Marissa crossed her arms.

"Congratulations on your engagement," she said, barely making eye contact with Sam.

"Isn't there _more _you'd like to say to her?" Freddie asked. "You know, something along the lines of an _apology_?"

Marissa sighed. "I'm _sorry _if anything I said to you earlier may have been considered _offensive_."

Sam said nothing.

"Go on…" Freddie said.

She pursed her lips, and then, somewhat reluctantly, said, "I know you and I have had our differences, but, well, Freddie really does seem to love you, so-so you must have _some _good traits deep down. And, well," she took a deep breath. "I look forward to having you in our family."

Freddie smiled, satisfied at his mother's apology. He turned to Sam. "Sam? Um, would-would _you _like to say anything?"

Sam looked at him, and could tell by the expression on his face that he wasn't going to give this up. So swallowing every smart comment she wanted to hurl at this woman, she plastered on a fake smile. "Thank you."

Freddie knew better than to push the two any further. The only thing he could now hope for was for them to at least grow a little closer over time. But, well, for now at least he had made a little progress.


	420. Chapter 420

_Wedding_

"Come on, guys, we just need one more thing for iCarly this week," Carly said as her, Sam, Freddie and Gibby sat around the Shay's kitchen table.

"I got it," Gibby said. "We take wiener dog…"

"Yeah?" Sam said.

"And teach him Spanish," Gibby finished proudly.

"Ugh! Why are you so stupid?" Sam moaned.

"Hey! Freddie! She called me stupid?" Gibby gasped.

"What do you want me to do about that?" Freddie asked.

"She's your girlfriend! Can't you tell her to stop?"

"Yeah, like that would work," Freddie laughed.

"Gibby, we can't teach a wiener dog to speak Spanish," Carly sighed.

"Well, if we could just go back to my idea of bringing in two mimes to fight in a vat of bacon fat…" Sam said.

"No!" Carly and Freddie said firmly.

"See," Gibby said triumphantly to Sam. "Doesn't feel good when people spit all over your ideas, does it?"

"It also won't feel good when my _fist _makes contact with your _face_," Sam snapped.

"Wow, someone's _extra _feisty today," Carly commented.

"She's mad that they sold out of tickets for the big MMA fight coming to Seattle this weekend," Freddie explained.

"This was going to be the fight of the century!" Sam moaned. "And now I'll have to watch on Spencer's pay-per-view like some chump!"

"It'll still be good, baby," Freddie said, putting an arm around her.

"No, it's going to be worse than that time Gibby made us all watch that video of his cat getting a shot at the vet's!"

"Hey! That was a big moment for him!" Gibby defended.

"Sam, I really think watching the fight on T.V. will be just as entertaining as watching it live at the ring," Freddie sighed, reaching into his pocket. "But…if you _insist _on going to the match…these might help."

He handed her two slips of paper.

"Holy chiz!" Sam exclaimed. "These are tickets for this weekend!"

"Yeah they are," Freddie beamed. "I thought you and I could go, you know, like a date night."

"Oh my God, you're the best!" Sam grinned, throwing her arms around her boyfriend.

"Alright, that's very touching an all," Carly said, smiling at the couple. "But we _do _still need to figure out that last bit for iCarly. So can you guys try to hold off on the make-out session for just a little bit?"

"Fine," Freddie nodded, pulling away from Sam. "Why don't we maybe try-"

"You guys!" Spencer exclaimed suddenly, bursting into the room. "I have the best news ever!"

"Oh, did that thing on your back go away?" Gibby asked.

"Um, no, it's actually getting bigger, thank you," Spencer frowned. "But seriously! I found you the perfect guy to do something totally cool on iCarly this week!"

"Really?" Carly said. "That's perfect, we were just trying to figure out one more thing for the show."

"Who's the guy?" Sam asked.

"Well, I was at that fancy bakery near the pet store," Spencer explained. "Sampling wedding cakes-"

"Why, you're not getting married," Freddie pointed out. "You're not even in a relationship."

"I just wanted the cake, okay?" Spencer snapped. "Anyway, while I was sampling the cakes, I met this guy who, get this, is a real-life hypnotist!"

"A hypnotist?" Carly repeated. "Come on, Spencer, you know there's no such thing as hypnosis."

"There is too!" Spencer retorted. "So I got to talking with this guy, and it turns out he's gonna be in Seattle until the end of the week, and he said he loves doing performances, so I asked him if he'd want to be on your show and he said _yes_!"

"Whoa, you think this guy could hypnotize _me_?" Gibby asked. "I've always wanted to be hypnotized."

"Why?" Carly frowned.

"It's on my bucket list," Gibby shrugged.

"Spence, you can't really believe that people can be hypnotized," Freddie said.

"Yeah, I once tried to hypnotize my mom into giving up spaghetti straps, but it didn't work, and now our entire neighborhood has to suffer," Sam said.

"But he says he's the real deal!" Spencer said.

"You know, even if this hypnotist guy is just a fake, it would still be kind of fun to do an iCarly bit about hypnosis," Carly reasoned. "Maybe we could have the guy on anyway, and if it winds up tanking then we just pretend that was the plan the whole time."

"Well if it means this planning session is done, then sure," Sam agreed. "Bring on the hypnotist." She turned back to Freddie. "So…wanna go make out now?"

"I thought you'd never ask," Freddie smirked as the couple got to their feet and ran out of the apartment.

…

"So where is this guy?" Sam asked, digging into a bag of pork rinds as the teens waited in the iCarly studio.

"Yeah, the show starts in ten minutes," Freddie nodded, fiddling with his camera.

"Spencer said he'd be here in time for the show," Carly said. "Gibby, you ready to be hypnotized?"

"So ready," Gibby said. "This is gonna be great!"

"Hey, you guys, guess who's here…" Spencer said, coming into the studio with an older gentleman. "It's Gordon Kazam! The Hypnotist!"

"That's right, it's me!" Gordon said. "Ready to show the Internet my powers!"

"Er…right," Carly smiled politely. "Nice to meet you Mr.…. Kazam?"

"Thanks for agreeing to be on the show," Freddie said. "We really appreciate it."

"Anytime, anytime," Mr. Kazam said.

"Mr. Kazam, it is an _honor_ to meet you," Gibby said, rushing over to the man. "And I cannot _wait _to be hypnotized by someone of your-"

"Oh…I didn't know I would be hypnotizing _this _fellow," Gordon frowned.

"Yeah, it's sort of been a dream of his," Carly said.

"A dream?" Gordon repeated.

"Yeah, he's not exactly 'right in the head'," Sam said.

"Hmmmm," Gordon sighed thoughtfully.

"Is there a problem?" Freddie asked.

"Well, I did have my best trick prepared for the show," he said slowly. "But I need _two _people for it. And I was hoping I could demonstrate it with the two lovely young ladies."

"Us?" Carly said.

"You want to hypnotize us?" Sam asked.

"Sure do!" Gordon replied.

"Wait, wait, wait," Gibby said. "What about me?"

"You up for it?" Carly asked Sam, ignoring Gibby's comment.

"Eh, why not," Sam shrugged.

"Super!" Gordon grinned.

"But Mr. Kazam, you-you _are _still going to hypnotize _me _right?" Gibby asked.

"Eh, we'll see kid," Gordon said dismissively.

"Guys, show starts in thirty seconds," Freddie announced, tossing Sam her blue remote.

"But I wore my new kakis," Gibby said. "And-And I put on a fresh pair of socks! And I even had my underwear-"

"In five, four, three, two…" Freddie said, waving a hushing hand at Gibby.

"Happy National Buy Sam a Ham Day!" Sam said, jumping in front of the camera with Carly. "Please send all hams to Bushwell Plaza with a bottle of barbecue sauce!"

"She's kidding, there's no ham holiday!" Carly laughed.

"Yet…" Sam said. "I'm still waiting on a response from the representative at the Board of Holidays."

"We have a real treat for you iCarly viewers tonight," Carly continued. "My brother Spencer arranged for an actual hypnotist to be on iCarly tonight!"

Sam pushed the applause button on her remote.

"So come on out here, Gordon Kazam!" Carly grinned.

"Hello, Internet!" Gordon said, waving at the camera. "Er, they _can _see me, right?"

"Yes, they can see you," Carly chuckled. "So Gordon, why don't you tell our viewers what sort of hypnosis trick you'll be showing them tonight?"

"Well, it's my very favorite!" Gordon explained. "I am going to make Carly and Sam here _switch brains_!"

Freddie held back the desire to roll his eyes. He couldn't believe people actually bought this stuff. But then again, this _was _the Internet.

"Whoa! Maybe I'll have a chance of passing chemistry then!" Sam joked for the audience.

"So how do you make us switch minds?" Carly asked.

"Here, have a seat," Gordon said, gesturing for the two girls to sit down in the conveniently placed chairs. He pulled out an odd pendulum. "Just relax your minds, and I'll take care of the rest."

"Oh boy," Freddie mumbled under his breath.

"You are both getting very sleepy," Gordon began, swinging his pendulum in front of the girls. "Very, very sleepy. You fill your eyelids growing heavy. It's okay to let them close."

Carly and Sam both closed their eyes. Freddie really had to admire their acting skills; they were making it seem like they actually were falling into Gordon's trance.

"You are both drifting off, very peacefully," Gordon continued. "You're becoming very open to outside suggestions. Now, Carly, you are going to push away your own persona and take on the persona of Sam. You will do this when I say 'Bird', okay?"

"Bird…" Carly mumbled sleepily, not opening her eyes.

"And Sam," Gordon went on. "You will also push away your own persona and replace it with Carly's. You will do this when I say 'Yo-Yo', okay?"

"Yo-yo," Sam muttered.

"On the count of three," Gordon said. "You will both wake up. One, two…Three!"

Carly and Sam's eyes bolted open. If Freddie didn't know better, he might _actually _be a little freaked out right now.

The girls were simply staring out in front of them now, completely spaced out.

"Now here's the fun part," Gordon said to the camera. He cleared his throat. "Bird!"

Suddenly, Carly snapped out of her daze.

"You feel like Sam, Carly?" Freddie smirked, pointing the camera at her.

"Can you get that thing out of my face, Frednub?" Carly snapped. "And what did you do with my pork rinds?"

_Nice acting, Carls,_ Freddie smiled to himself.

"And now…yo-yo!" Gordon said loudly.

Sam snapped out of her daze as well. She looked down at her shoes. "Ugh," she said, her voice sounding girlier than usual. "Why are my shoe laces so _dirty_? I really should get them cleaned. Oh! Or maybe I can just buy some new ones! I think the mall is having a sale on sandals this weekend!"

"Wow," Freddie chuckled. "That's pretty impressive."

"The art of hypnosis, my friend," Gordon said, his eyes sparkling.

_Sure_…Freddie thought to himself.

"Ugh, can you stop rambling about shoes?" Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Guys, if you two would like to 'take back your personas' now, we have to finish the show," Freddie said. "Next we're doing the bit with Gibby and the flaming, extra-spicy hot sauce."

"Hot sauce?" Sam frowned. "Couldn't Gibby get hurt with that?"

"Who cares?" Carly scoffed.

"Um…" Freddie frowned, unsure of why the girls were dragging this out so long. He turned the camera onto himself. "While we get this whole thing sorted out, please enjoy this prerecorded video of a snail and an earthworm slithering around an old guy's foot."

He clicked a few buttons on his tech cart and then set down the camera.

"You guys, very funny and all, but we need to move on to our next segment," Freddie said, walking over to Carly and Sam.

"You're not the boss of us," Carly snapped. "Go back to your camera, tech monkey."

"Don't call him a tech monkey," Sam said. "He's a very important part of the show."

"Um…what?" Freddie frowned. "You guys, you can stop acting now."

"Oh, they're not acting son, that's real hypnotism right there," Gordon said proudly.

"N-No way, it can't be," Freddie said.

"Oh darn, I think I chipped a nail during the show," Sam said.

"Who cares about a fingernail? My pork rinds are still missing!" Carly said.

Freddie groaned and turned back to Gordon. "Fine, fine, whatever. Clearly they're dead set on playing along on this little charade. So can you please 'unhypnotize' them so we can get back to our show?"

"Very well," Gordon conceded. "I'll just-"

Suddenly, his phone began to ring. He reached into his pocket and answered.

"Hello? Yes. You don't say? Well I'll be right there!" he hung up and stuffed his phone back away.

"Sorry kid," he said, heading for the door. "My ex-wife wants to meet me for fro-yo!"

"Wait!" Freddie frowned. "You have to fix them! You can't just leave them like this."

"I'll be back tomorrow morning!" Gordon called as he ran out of the studio. "Don't worry, they'll be fine!"

"Well that's just _fantastic_," Freddie sighed. He looked back at Carly and Sam. "Come on…you two can't really be hypnotized."

"Hey, since we ended the show early, we have time to go to the mall now," Sam said. "I need to pick up some more lip gloss from Pucker Up."

"You hate lip gloss," Freddie pointed out.

"Oh, and I need to buy some fireworks," Carly said. "I have some 'plans' for Ms. Briggs' car."

"This is starting to really freak me out, guys," Freddie said. "This has gone on far enough. Will you start acting normal again!"

"Oh, and right next to the fireworks store is that novelty coffee mug shop with the cute cashier," Sam grinned. "Maybe if I really work my flirt, he'll ask me out!"

"Whoa!" Freddie exclaimed. "You can't flirt with coffee mug guys!"

"Why not?" Sam asked innocently. "He has the _cutest _eyes."

"Because _we're _dating!" Freddie cried.

Carly let out a loud laugh. "Who would date a doof like you?"

"Sam, _tell _her we're dating," Freddie said.

"Well, Freddie…I-You know I love you as a _friend_," Sam told him.

"_What_?" Freddie yelled.

"Come on, we're just friends," Sam smiled at him. "Buds, pals…"

"We are _not _just friends!" Freddie said. "We're quite _more _than just friends! We made out for like, three hours this morning!"

"Are-Are you sure that was _me_?" Sam said gently.

"And not just your pillow?" Carly smirked.

"Sam!" Freddie said. "We've been dating for eight months! We love each other!"

"Yes, as-"

"Not as friends!" Freddie groaned. "As boyfriend and girlfriend!"

"Dude, this is getting pathetic," Carly said.

"We have tickets for that big MMA fight this weekend!" Freddie continued, ignoring Carly's comment. "We're going there on a _date_."

"Why would I go to an MMA fight?" Sam cringed. "Especially on a date. Fighting's not romantic."

"Whoa…you got MMA tickets?" Carly said. "What are you waiting for, Fredwad, hand them over!"

"Okay, this is-this is _insane_!" Freddie yelled. "There is no way you two really switched brains!"

"Freddie, calm down, there's no need to yell," Sam said. "Look, why don't you come to the mall with us and-"

"Why, so I can watch my girlfriend hit on every guy that she sees?" Freddie spat.

"Okay…maybe the mall isn't a good idea," Sam said slowly. "I know, let's just go watch a movie together. Oh! There's a new romantic comedy I've been dying to see!"

"Romantic comedy? You hate romantic comedies!" Freddie cried, exasperated.

"Ugh, can't we watch an action flick?" Carly asked. "Or some horror movie with lots of guts?"

"And _you _nearly throw up at the sight of blood in _any _movie!" Freddie exclaimed. "This is just _too _weird!"

"The only one weird here is _you_," Carly snapped.

"We'll order pizza," Sam told him. "Maybe you're just acting…_off_ because you're hungry. Want to split a thin crust tomato basil pizza?"

"Yeah, split a pizza with her, because there's no way you're getting _any _of my Meat Slam pie," Carly said firmly.

"Ah! I can't take this!" Freddie said, turning and leaving the studio, shaking his head and mumbling something about 'dumb hypnosis' under his breath.

…..

"Whoa, you look _terrible_," Spencer said, coming into his living room the next morning, spotting Freddie slumped on the couch as the girls at breakfast in the kitchen.

"Yeah, thanks!" Freddie snapped. "Do you know what I've had to _deal _with? Where were you all day yesterday anyway? You dropped off that hypnotist and then you left."

"Oh yeah, Socko and I spent the day collecting old banjos from the junkyard," Spencer explained. "For my banjo sculpture."

"A banjo sculpture?" Carly repeated. "Dude, that sounds lame."

Spencer gasped.

"I'm sure it'll turn out just fine," Sam smiled at him. "You're a great artist."

"What-What-" Spencer stammered, looking at Freddie with a confused expression.

"Yeah, see what your little friend Gordon Kazam did to them?" Freddie said. "He swapped their brains! Carly's acting like Sam and Sam's acting like Carly!"

"Oh, you mean my hypnotist fan who's a _fake_?" Spencer said triumphantly. "This _proves _hypnosis is real!"

"No!" Freddie retorted. "He-He-They're just-"

"Sorry, I can't hear over all the _hypnosis _in the air!" Spencer smirked.

"Look, you can gloat later, okay?" Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Gordon's going to be here any minute to fix them. Thank God, because this has been a _nightmare_!"

"It's been that bad?" Spencer asked.

"Yes! My girlfriend doesn't even know she's my girlfriend!" Freddie exclaimed. "And she's acting all _nice _and _sweet_ and _girly _and I hate it! I just want Sam back! And I want Carly back too! I don't like her when she's mean! You know she poured a gallon of chocolate milk on me this morning to wake me up?"

"Aw man, that's rough," Spencer frowned.

"I know!"

"I was really looking forward to having some chocolate milk."

Before Freddie could reply, there was a knock at the door.

"Finally!" Freddie sighed in relief as he went to answer the door. He opened it up and let in Gordon Kazam.

"Alright, what's the problem?" Gordon asked, stepping inside.

"The _problem_ is Carly and Sam's brains are still switched!" Freddie yelled. "Now I've got an abusive best friend and a girlfriend who doesn't think she's dating me!"

"Wait…you're dating that blonde one?" Gordon frowned. "Isn't she a bit out of your league?"

"Very!" Freddie snapped. "Now will you just fix them?"

"Okay, okay," Gordon said.

"Mr. Kazam?" Sam frowned. "What are you doing back here?"

"Yeah, and why are you wearing that gross tie?" Carly asked, popping a piece of bacon into her mouth.

"You see?" Freddie said.

"Well girls, I just wanted to finish up that trick I showed you yesterday," Gordon said. "Is that okay with you?"

"Sure," Sam smiled.

"Why not," Carly shrugged. "I've got nothing better to do."

"Okay," Gordon said as the girls sat down, pulling out his pendulum. "Let's get started then."

He began to swing the pendulum again. "You both are getting very sleepy…you're feeling very relaxed and open to my suggestions."

"Whoa, this is so cool!" Spencer grinned. "A real hypnosis in my kitchen!"

Freddie rolled his eyes but said nothing.

"Now Carly, on the count of three, you will push out Sam's persona and take back your own," Gordon said. "And Sam, on the count of three you will also push out Carly's persona and take back your own. Yes?"

"Yes…" both girls said sleepily.

"Good," Gordon said. "Now…one, two, three!"

Both girls started awake, blinking as though they had just woken up.

"Did it work?" Freddie asked anxiously. "Do you need to try again? Maybe you should-"

"_What _are you blabbing about, Fredward?" Sam said.

"Sam!" Freddie grinned, throwing his arms around her. "You're back!"

"Aw," Carly smiled at her friends. "That's sweet."  
"Carly!" Freddie exclaimed, hugging her as well. "Yes, you're both back to normal!"

"Dude, seriously, what did your mom but in your fiber-enriched oatmeal this morning?" Sam asked.

"Hold on," Freddie said, turning back to Sam. "Sam…what are you doing this weekend?"

"What are you talking about?" Sam said. "I thought we were going out to the MMA fight. You know, for our date night."

"Yes! You know you're dating me again!"

"Okay, you've officially gone insane," Sam said.

"Sam, be nice," Carly said. Then she frowned. "Um…why does my hair smell like bacon?"

"Yeah…and why the heck am I wearing a _dress_?" Sam asked, looking down at her apparel.

"Freddie, what's going on?" Carly questioned.

"Oh, it's a _long _story," Freddie said. "A very long, stressful story."


	421. Chapter 421

**AN-So this oneshot is actually based on the Drake and Josh episode Josh is done, where Josh basically pushes Drake out of his life. Also, this oneshot focuses more on Sam and Freddie's friendship instead of their romantic relationship. Enjoy!**

…**..**

_Billion_

"Alright, here it is!" Freddie announced proudly, holding up a small packet of papers. "My official application for the Pear Company's Young Developers and Technology Enthusiast Camp!"

"That sounds _awful_," Spencer said from his living room, looking into the kitchen where Freddie was sitting at the table.

"No, this camp is _amazing_," Freddie said. "If I get in, I can get sneak peeks at the latest Pear products, learn from some of the top software developers in the _country_, and even get a cool T-shirt autographed by the CEO of the Pear Company!"

"Wow, pretty impressive," Spencer said.

"Yeah, I just really hope I get picked to go," Freddie said. "I'm going to mail this application tomorrow and then I'll find out in two to four weeks."

"Isn't it kind of weird that a camp all about _technology _would have you send in an application the old fashioned way instead of by email?" Spencer frowned. "It's a billion times easier!"

"I guess," Freddie shrugged. "But hey, at least now I finally have an excuse to use my fancy _Galaxy Wars _stamps."

"Oh! Speaking of _Galaxy Wars_, guess who just found a Lou Groundrunner pillowcase at the Pottery Barn!" Spencer said excitedly.

"Whoa, no way, that's so cool!" Freddie said.

"It's on my pillow now," Spencer said. "Come on, I'll show you!"

"Alright!" Freddie grinned, flowing Spencer into his bedroom.

Just as Freddie and Spencer disappeared, though, the door to the apartment opened and Carly and Sam walked in.

"I can't believe you're on your third slushie," Carly said as Sam gulped her beverage happily.

"Mama loves her sugary drinks," Sam said as the two headed into the kitchen.

"You know, maybe _this _is why you're so hyper all the time," Carly said, rolling her eyes as she grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge.

"Hey, do you guys still have that honey glazed ham in the fridge?" Sam asked, setting down her slushie on the table, right next to Freddie's application.

"No," Carly replied. "Spencer gave the rest of it to a cute puppy outside the building last night."

"Dang it!" Sam exclaimed, slamming her fist down on the table, accidently sending her slushie spilling.

"Nicely done," Carly said.

"It's Spencer's fault," Sam mumbled. "Who gives perfectly good ham to a dog?"

"Hey, what did you spill that on?" Carly frowned, spotting the cherry syrup soaked papers on the table.

"I dunno," Sam shrugged, picking up the packet. "Young Developers? Oh, this must be Frednub's."

"Oh no!" Carly said. "I hope it wasn't important."

"Who cares?" Sam scoffed as Spencer and Freddie came back out of the bedroom.

"Hey…what happened over there?" Freddie frowned as he rushed over to the table. "Was that-My application! What happened?"

"It got in the way of my slushie," Sam said simply. She turned to Spencer. "You gave my ham away to a _dog_?"

"You-You spilled cherry slushie all over my _application_?" Freddie cried.

"Oh calm down," Sam said. "Just redo it."

"I can't just redo it!" Freddie exclaimed. "It took me weeks to complete. It had letters of recommendation from three teachers and the owner of the Pear Store here, I can't get extra copies of those! I can't send this in at all, it's completely ruined!"

"You're overreacting," Sam said. "It was just a dumb application, it's not like it was anything important."

"It was _very_ important!" Freddie yelled, taking everybody, even Sam, by surprise. "I wanted to go to this camp more than anything, and you can't even have the _decency _to apologize for destroying my application! But you know what, I shouldn't be surprised, this is so typical of you, Sam! All you do is destroy everything important to me and then act like it's no big deal. But I'm not going to put up with it anymore! I'm done!"

"What do you mean you're done?" Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"I mean from this point on, I'm not going be involved with you at all!" Freddie said. He turned to Carly. "I will continue to do iCarly, because I know it's important to you, Carly, and I don't want to let the show down. But other than that, Sam's not going to be involved in my life anymore."

"Freddie-" Carly started, but the boy had already turned and headed out of the apartment.

"Alright, well now I need to go back down to the quickie mart and buy another slushie," Sam said as the door slammed shut.

"Um…Sam? Are you okay?" Carly asked.

"Yeah, why?" Sam questioned.

"Well, um, it just seems like Freddie was really mad," Carly said. "And-And that whole cutting you out of his life thing…"

"Pfft, the nub isn't serious about that," Sam laughed. "He's just got his NugNug boxers in a knot. He'll go home, take a relaxing tick bath and forget about this whole thing by tomorrow morning."

"I dunno, he seemed pretty serious to me," Carly said. "Maybe you should go talk to him."  
"No!" Sam said. "There's no way I would go crawling over to Fredwad's. Trust me, he'll be over this in no time. He needs me in his life way more than I need his nerdy butt."

…..

The next morning at the high school, Freddie happily walked over to Carly's locker.

"Morning!" he said brightly.

"Wow, someone's in a better mood than yesterday," Carly commented.

"You know, I just woke up this morning and felt like I had years of stress lifted from my shoulder," Freddie told her.

"Right…" Carly nodded. "Anyway, did you figure out what you're going to do about your application? I feel bad that it got destroyed. Maybe today after school I can help you try and fix it up or call those teachers who wrote those recommendation letters and see if they saved a copy or-"

"No need," Freddie said. "I already took care of it. Surprisingly everyone was really understanding and is willing to give me another copy of the letters. I can resend the application tonight!"

"Oh, well that's great," Carly said. "Now you can-"

Just then Sam came around the corner, a wad of papers in her hand.

"Dude!" she said to Freddie. "You never emailed me the answers to the science homework last night! All I have to turn in now is a blank diagram of how photosynthesis works!"

"Sorry, but I told you, I'm not going to be doing any of that anymore," Freddie said simply, crossing his arms. "It's not my responsibility to get _your _homework assignments done."

"You always email me the answers to the homework!" Sam pointed out. "Now seriously, hand over your answers before the bell rings."

"No," Freddie answered calmly. He turned to Carly. "I'll see you at lunch, Carls."

"What was _that _about?" Sam frowned as Freddie left.

"I told you, he seemed pretty upset about yesterday," Carly replied. "I think he meant what he said. You really need to go-"

"No," Sam said firmly. "If Fredward wants to play this little game, fine. But he better watch out, because Mama always wins."

…..

"So then, while I was at the Groovy Smoothie, T-Bo gave me two smoothies for the price of one!" Freddie said a few days later as him and Gibby stood outside Ridgeway after school.

"Wow, really?" Gibby said. "Why? T-Bo's totally stingy. The other day he charged me fifty cents for taking an extra napkin!"

"I dunno, he just said I seemed like I was in a really good mood, and it was good for his business if his customers look happy," Freddie shrugged.

"You know, you _have _been in a good mood lately," Gibby observed. "What's up?"

"Oh you know, I just feel like I have a lot less…tension," Freddie replied. "It's like I-"

"Yo, Fredwad," Sam said, coming over to the boys. "You ready?"

"Ready for what?" Gibby asked.

"Every Thursday we go down to the Italian restaurant, pick up a bucket of meatballs and play a few rounds of meat golf while we wait for Carly to get out of her student government meetings," Sam explained. She turned back to Freddie. "So you ready or what?"

"I made plans with Gibby today," Freddie said. "Plans where I won't have metal golf clubs swung at my head."

"What? Dude, cool it already with this 'I'm done' thing," Sam said. "It's been like, three days."

"I told you, I'm done for good," Freddie shrugged.

"Come on, you're being dramatic," Sam said. "You're so-"

"Sam!"

The teens turned around to see principal Franklin marching towards them.

"Um…Ted?" Sam said slowly.

"Do you have any idea why Ms. Briggs car has three dozen eggs thrown at it?" Principal Franklin asked, crossing his arms.

"Um, no," Sam said. "Maybe she has some rogue chicken mad at her?"

"Why would a chicken get revenge on someone by pelting its unborn babies at their car?" Gibby frowned.  
"Gibby!" Sam snapped.

"Alright, Ms. Puckett, you know the drill, detention for a week starting now," Principal Franklin sighed.

"What? I didn't do it!" Sam exclaimed. "I've been out here with Gibby and Freddie for the past twenty minutes! There's no way I could've been the one to egg her car."

"Mr. Benson?" Principal Franklin said to Freddie. "Is that true?"

Freddie looked Sam right in the eye. "No, sir," he said. "She just got here a few minutes ago, and I did see three egg cartons in her locker earlier."

"Benson!" Sam yelled. "What-What-You _always _cover for me!"

"Used to," Freddie said. "Not anymore."

"Let's go, Sam," Principal Franklin said. "Or you'll get an extra day added."

Sam gave Freddie one last glare before following the principal back into the school.

"Fine, you know what? I don't need you either!" Sam yelled over her shoulder. "We both know that you'll come back to me way before I need you!"

"Wow," Gibby said as Sam and Principal Franklin went back inside. "You okay man?"

"Yeah," Freddie said, still starting at the spot where Sam had been. "Yeah, I'm fine."

…..

The next day Freddie stood in the iCarly studio, playing with his laptop, getting ready to start the show. Carly had to run off for a few minutes to take a phone call from her granddad, and Sam still had not arrived yet, even through the show started in three minutes.

"I'm here, I'm here," Sam said, bursting into the studio. "I almost forgot because _somebody _didn't send me a reminder text message like they always do!"

"That's not my job," Freddie said, not looking up from his computer.

Sam gave him an irritated face before walking over to the small table in front of the tech cart that had a bunch of bottles filled with different colored liquids sat.

"What are these for?" Sam asked.

"The show," Freddie replied bluntly.

"What bit are we doing with these?"

"We switched the toothbrush skit with Fun With Science at the rehearsal yesterday," Freddie said.

"Well I had detention then thanks to somebody not covering for me!" Sam snapped. "And you always send me what I miss when I don't show up for rehearsal. I don't know this bit!"

Freddie shrugged and didn't respond.

"Ugh! Fine, keep up this stupid game, I don't even care," Sam said. "Where's Carly?"

"Okay, okay, let's start the show!" Carly said, running back into the studio.

"Your granddad okay?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah, he just couldn't figure out how to update his Cookie Crumble app on his Pearpad," Carly sighed. She turned to Sam. "Remember, for the opening Fun With Science bit, you pour the red liquid into the green liquid to get it to make the cool looking smoke rings, got it? Don't mix the purple and orange or the blue and yellow, because we have no idea what that will do."  
"Wait…what?" Sam frowned, but Freddie had already begun counting down.

"In five, four, three, two…"

"Hi I'm Carly!" Carly grinned at the camera.

"And I'm Sam!" Sam smiled. "And this is…"

"iCarly!"

"So we know we usually try to keep education out of our iCarly fun," Carly began.

"A tradition I don't understand why we're not keeping," Sam mumbled.

"But today," Carly continued. "We're going to show you the science can actually be pretty cool. So we got these chemicals from our school's science club and we're gonna show you how they can be used to make some pretty awesome smoke rings!"

"Maybe…" Sam said, slowly picking up two bottles, trying to remember which colors Carly told her to mix. She picked up a purple and blue bottle and poured them together, hoping for the best.

The second the colors combined, though, they began fizzling and spilling out onto Sam's hand, causing an odd tingling sensation.

"Whoa! Sam!" Carly cried, turning to her best friend. "What happened?"

"I don't know!" Sam exclaimed, her hand really hurting now.

Freddie set down his camera, looking genuinely concerned.

"You combined the wrong colors!" Carly told her, taking the bottles.

"Well I didn't know what I was doing!" Sam yelled. "No one told me what was going on!"

"Well then maybe someone should've shown up for rehearsal yesterday!" Freddie said.

"Fine!" Sam said, her voice shaking as she stormed towards the door of the studio, her hand still dripping with the chemicals. "Fine! I give up! You win, Freddie! Clearly I need you in my life more than you need me! I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry I messed up your application and I'm sorry I always ruin everything for you and I'm sorry for-for everything okay! I'm-I'm just sorry!"

Freddie blinked, caught completely of guard.

"I'm sorry," Sam mumbled again.

"Sam-" Carly started, but Sam had already ran out of the studio. She turned to Freddie. "Um, Freddie? You-You gonna go after her?"

Freddie sighed and picked up the camera. "Let's finish the show."

….

Sam sat outside Bushwell Plaza, hanging up her Pearphone. She had tried fifteen times to call her mom to pick her up, but it seemed like the Singles Casino Night Mixer she was attending was more important to her.

She looked down at her hand. Most of the tingling had died down now and she didn't think there was going to be any serious side affects to her little accident.

She sighed. She didn't think it would be so hard not having Freddie in her life anymore…but things seemed to be going much more smoothly for him than for her.

Suddenly, she heard footsteps behind her. She looked over her shoulder and saw Freddie coming towards her carrying two golf clubs.

"Hey," he grinned.

"What are you doing here?" Sam asked, confused.

"You ready to putt some meat, Puckett?" Freddie asked, pulling out a bucket of meatballs.

"What are you doing?" Sam frowned.

"Well I'm _about _to win a game of meat golf," Freddie told her, handing her a club.

Sam stared at him and he smiled back at her.

And at that moment, Sam knew they were good again.

"I don't know what you're thinking, Benson," Sam smirked, standing up. "But there's no way you're gonna win against Mama."

"We'll see," Freddie said. He dropped one giant meatball on the ground and prepared to putt.

"Wait, Benson?" Sam said.

"Yeah?"  
She took a deep breath and stepped towards him, hugging him.

"And that never happened, got it?" she said, pulling away from him after a few seconds.

"Sure," Freddie chuckled.


	422. Chapter 422

_Strength_

"So I don't think I get this movie," Carly frowned as her and Freddie sat on the Shay's couch. "Is the butler the thief who stole the diamonds from the widow's dog's trust fund, or is she the hero who stopped the maid from stealing the emerald encrusted flea collar?"

"Neither, the butler's only role in the movie so far has been serving lemonade to the pool boy who tricked the chef into hiding the sapphires in the cookie jar," Freddie replied

"Okay, how are you possibly following this movie?" Carly asked. "It makes absolutely no sense!"

"I'm dating Sam," Freddie smirked. "Confusing is my specialty."

"Well, I'm giving up," Carly said, getting to her feet and heading over to the computer on the kitchen counter.

"You're never going to find out who switched the gold nuggets with chicken nuggets," Freddie told her.

"I'll live," Carly said, rolling her eyes as she logged onto her email.

"You know, I don't think I entirely trust that doorman," Freddie said. "He seems very fishy. And he _was_ the last person to see the tennis star's medallion…"

"Hey," Carly said, looking at the computer screen. "Check out this email I got from those people who hosted the Web Awards a few years ago in Japan."

"They emailed you?" Freddie asked, pausing the movie and joining Carly at the computer.

"I just said that!" Carly said, shaking her head. "Anyway, here's what they emailed me. 'Dear Carly, Sam and Freddie, because of your current standing as one of the most viewed web pages in the entertainment category, we would like to cordially invite you to the first ever Web Talent Contest.'"

"Web talent contest?" Freddie frowned. "What's that?"

"Well maybe if I could keep _reading_…" Carly said.

"Oh, sorry."

"As I was saying, 'The Web Talent Contest will include competitors from over one hundred popular web shows from all across the country competing a talent that one individual from each show enters. The winner of the contest will not only be awarded with the fame and pride of being the most talented person on the web, but will receive a check for ten thousand dollars to further enhance their web show.'"

"Ten thousand dollars?" Freddie repeated, his eyes widening. "That's insane! We could afford to get new lenses for the cameras and maybe a new editing bay! Oh, and maybe even-"

"Dude, we haven't even won yet," Carly said. "Don't get your hopes up. Besides, are we even going to do this? I mean there are some pretty tough competitors. There's that girl who can jump rope while playing the clarinet, the man who spell any word backwards, the twins who can talk to hamsters…"

"So, we can win this!" Freddie said. "Where's the competition?"

"Um, California," Carly said.

"That's not far away at all," Freddie reasoned.

"Well…we need to at least ask Sam first," Carly said.

Right one cue, the apartment door opened and Sam walked in.

"Hey, baby? You wanna go to California?" Freddie asked.

"Um…yes?" Sam said, confused.

"Boom! She said yes, we're in!" Freddie said triumphantly.

"Why's Fredhead acting all weird?" Sam asked.

"There's some big talent competition for a bunch of people with web shows," Carly explained. "And there's a ten thousand dollar prize that he wants to use to buy a bunch of tech stuff."

"What? You can win ten thousand dollars just by winning a stupid talent show?" Sam exclaimed. "No way! We have to do this!"

"That's what I've been saying!" Freddie said, wrapping an arm around his girlfriend.

"Think of all the fireworks we could buy!" Sam said. "And the chicken wing platters!"

"Guys, come on, what we even do for a talent competition?" Carly asked.

"I dunno," Sam shrugged. "You can just-"

"Hold on, _me_?" Carly frowned. "Why do I have to be the one to compete? You're the ex-pageant girl!"

"Yes, emphasis on the _ex_," Sam said. "Come on, kid, you're talented! Plus I don't want to have to put on the fancy dress and do my make-up. But you live for that stuff!"

"I guess it would finally give me an excuse to wear that cute pink dress in the back of my closet," Carly said thoughtfully. "But what would my talent be?"

"I dunno, just sing a song," Sam shrugged.

"Yeah, maybe that one you sung at that weird wedding we went to in Wisconsin," Freddie suggested.

"Where the groom peed his pants?" Carly cringed.

"Uh-huh."

Carly sighed. "Fine, I'll represent iCarly in the Web Talent Show."

"Yes!" Sam and Freddie cheered, high fiving each other. "Ten thousand dollars here we come!"

Carly shook her head. "You two are made for each other."  
….

"Okay, Carly, I've carefully analyzed the competition and you have two main opponents you need to watch out for," Freddie said a few days later in the iCarly studio.

"I thought there were over one hundred opponents," Carly pointed out.

"Yeah, but you're gonna crush most of them," Sam told her. "There's one guy whose talent is seeing how many crayons he can shove in his mouth…actually that one's pretty impressive. His record is one full sixty-four box!"

"You'll beat the crayon boy, Carly, don't worry," Freddie assured her. "But as I was saying, the two people you need to look out for are also singing. Now, I don't want to freak you out, but one girl has already professionally recorded her song and the other sang back up for Mariah Carey when she was only eight."

"What?" Carly exclaimed. "There's no way I can win against people like that! I only sing in the shower and at tacky weddings!"

"Come on, kid, don't be intimidated," Sam said. "You can out-sing those two. You just need to focus on the prize. Ten thousand big ones! Think of all the cool stuff we can buy for the show! We can get a giant trampoline, or a baby lion! Oh, I know! We can order five hundred live crabs, put them in a wooden crate and tell Gibby that there's a peanut butter sandwich at the bottom-"

"Or we could spend the money on practical improvements for the show," Freddie said. "We can finally afford to switch to high-definition picture! And I could get some better lighting in here, because sometimes when we shoot, you guys turn out a little…pasty."

"Excuse me?" Sam said, raising an eyebrow.

"I mean pasty in the sexiest way possible of course," Freddie added quickly.

"Uh-huh," Sam said, swatting his shoulder. She turned back to Carly. "Okay, time to run through the song again."

"Can't we take a break?" Carly moaned. "I've sang it five hundred times already."

"One more time and then we can finally go shoe shopping to find those heels to match your dress," Sam grinned.

"Okay, okay, I'll sing!" Carly said. "I can't believe you're bribing me with shoes…that's low, you guys."

"Hey, whatever gets the job done," Freddie said. "And gets us that new Tosha Solar camera."

"And water skis," Sam added.

….

"Wow, this place is huge!" Spencer observed as him and the iCarly gang walked into the giant theatre where the talent competition was being held.

"Yeah, filled with Internet freaks about to lose and go home crying," Sam grinned.

"That's the attitude we want, baby," Freddie said, giving her a quick kiss. He turned to Carly. "Let's get you back to the dressing rooms so we can start prepping you."

"I'll go get a seat," Spencer said.

"Alright Carly, just remember to look right out at the judges," Sam said as the three headed back to the dressing rooms.

"And make sure you hit that high note at the end," Freddie told her.

"And don't-"

"Guys!" Carly said loudly. Or rather, she tried to say, for her voice came out shaky and raspy.

"Um…what's wrong with your voice?" Freddie frowned.

"I-I don't know," Carly said.

"Well fix it!" Sam exclaimed. "You need to be on stage singing in an hour!"

"I think I lost my voice," Carly said, her voice still sounding roughly like a cat in a blender. "Maybe because _some _people made me sing a billion times on the trip over here!"

"Oh man," Freddie sighed. "Now what are we gonna do? We're not going to get that ten thousand dollars for my deluxe memory chip _and _we're gonna look like idiots for dropping out of the competition an hour before we were supposed to perform."

"Dang it! I really wanted nine hundred pounds of marshmallows," Sam sighed.

"Nine hundred pounds of-never mind," Carly said. "Look, I'm _sorry _my voice was destroyed by certain friends of mine exploiting it, but we don't have to drop out. Sam, just go sing in my place."

"Ugh, I don't want to wear your frilly dress!" Sam moaned.

"Well then you can kiss your marshmallow dreams goodbye," Carly said. "You know all the words, it's either you do this or we go home losers."

"Fine, whatever," Sam conceded. "But I'm gonna need some ribs…and barbecue sauce."

"Okay, okay, we'll get them for you," Carly said. "Just go start getting ready. I'll be back there in a sec to help you."

"Wait, what just happened?" Freddie frowned as Sam grabbed the dress from Carly and headed over to a changing room. "Sam's going to sing in your place? Carly are you sure about this?"

"What's the big deal? Did you want to sing?" Carly asked.

"No," Freddie said. "But, um, it's just…Sam…Is she really ready to go sing on stage in front of a bunch of people."

"Just as ready as I was," Carly shrugged.

"But Sam…She-She-"

"Freddie…" Carly said slowly, a smile creeping onto her face. "Are you saying you don't have confidence that your girlfriend can pull this off?"

"No!" Freddie said quickly. "But it's just-"

"Wait," Carly said. "Have you heard Sam sing before?"

"I've heard rap, sure," Freddie shrugged. "But she can't just go out there and rap the song you were gonna-"

"No, have you ever heard her _sing _before?" Carly asked. "Like what I was going to do out on stage."

"Well, no," Freddie said.

"Well I have," Carly said. "She's really good. She has a great voice."

"Huh?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah, I asked her once if she wanted to sing on iCarly or something and she laughed and spit out the pudding she was eating," Carly recalled.

"Sam can _sing_?" Freddie exclaimed. "Like actually sing?"

"Uh-huh," Carly nodded. "You never knew?"

"No!"

"Well she's really shy about these things," Carly reasoned. "The only reason I know is because one night during a sleepover we were goofing around playing karaoke. But trust me, Sam has just as good a chance of winning this thing as I did. Who knows, maybe she'll do better than I would've."

"Okay, I have the dress on," Sam said, coming out of the changing room, dawning Carly's light pink gown. "Where are my ribs?"

"Baby, you _sing_?" Freddie said, still in disbelief.

"Yeah, I guess," Sam shrugged. "A little."

"You're amazing," Carly assured her, helping her zip up the back of the dress.

"Why have you never sung for me?" Freddie asked.

"Because that's a whole level of mushiness I don't need to get to," Sam snapped.

"You couldn't have at least hummed me a tune?"

"Freddie relax, you'll hear her sing in a few minutes," Carly said. "Now I'm gonna go try and find some ribs here. Freddie, help Sam warm up."

"You mad?" Sam asked as Carly rushed away.

Freddie sighed. "No. I mean…you _do _look pretty hot in that dress."

Sam rolled her eyes, leaning up to kiss him.

"Well, you know what, this is a great turn of events," Freddie said. "I can't wait to hear you sing now. You know all the words, right?"

Sam nodded, looking at her reflection in the mirror.

"Good, and it's like you were telling Carly, eye-contact with the judges is really important. You want to connect with them."

"Okay," Sam said, and Freddie noticed that her voice was missing its usual Sam Puckett spark.

"What's the matter?" Freddie asked.

Sam shrugged. "Nothing."  
"Sam…"

"I've just never sang in front of a group of people this big before, okay?" Sam snapped. "I've danced back in my pageant days, sure, but I never did anything with singing before."

"But Carly said you were really good," Freddie told her.

"Carly's also my best friend, it's sort of against the rules for her to say I suck," Sam pointed out. "What if somebody else thinks I sound like-like a rooster crowing or something?"

"No one will think that," Freddie assured her.

"How do you know? You've never heard me!"

"Sam, you're just getting the pre-performance jitters," Freddie told her.

"Why'd Carly have to go and lose her voice?" Sam moaned. "This is why I wanted _her _to perform in the first place!"

"Sam, you perform live on the web in front of a million people," Freddie told her, putting his hands on her shoulders. "And you never crack under the pressure."  
"I can't see _those_ people," Sam pointed out.

"So then pretend that everybody else in the audience is gone too!" Freddie said.

"That doesn't work, Fredwad!"

"It will if you just believe it will," Freddie said. "And Carly and I will stand right in the wings if you want. If you start to feel nervous, you can just look over at us. Carly's your best friend and she'll support you no matter what. And I, well, I love you."

Sam said nothing.

"Think of all the dangerous things you can buy for iCarly if you win," Freddie said. "All the things that will probably wind up causing me pain."

Sam chuckled. "I did have my eye on a mechanical bull…"

"Then think of me tied to that mechanical bull, screaming for my life," Freddie said.

Sam smiled. "You always know just what to say, Fredward."

…

"Okay, I think Sam's next," Carly said as her and Freddie stood anxiously in the wings of the stage.

"Yeah, she's going out now!" Freddie said, watching as Sam walked out.

"You excited?" Carly asked knowingly.

Freddie nodded; he couldn't wait to hear Sam sing.

The background music began and Sam slowly picked up the microphone on stage. She looked over at the wings at Carly and Freddie who both gave her reassuring smiles.

And then, when Sam opened her mouth and began to sing, it was like Freddie's whole world had stopped.

She sounded _amazing_! He couldn't believe that the beautiful girl who was out on stage singing like an angel was actually his girlfriend.

"Pretty good, isn't she?" Carly smiled.

"She's-She's-" Freddie stammered, unable to find the words.

"Alright lover boy, put those eyes back in their sockets," Carly grinned.

Freddie stood there, absolutely enamored by the sound of Sam's voice the entire length of the song. When she finished, he cheered as loudly as he could, though he could barely hear himself over the massive applause of the audience.

"Oh my God, Sam!" Carly exclaimed as her best friend walked off stage. "You are so good! Did you hear all that applause? Everyone totally loved you!"

"Good, so can I get out of this dress now?" Sam asked.

"S-Sam," Freddie said, wrapping his arms around her. "Sam, you were fantastic!"

"I was off on a couple of notes," Sam sighed.

"No way, you sang perfectly," Freddie said firmly.

"Oh hey, that guy who speed paints sad clowns is on now," Carly said, looking back on stage. "Oh…that's sort of creepy."

"Well, that's the cue for me go grab the rest of my ribs," Sam said.

"Please don't get barbecue sauce on my dress," Carly sighed.

"We'll see!" Sam called over her shoulder.

…..

"I can't believe you only came in second, Sam," Carly said later that day after the talent show as the group stood back in the dressing room, cleaning up all their things.

"Yeah, you were robbed, baby," Freddie nodded.

"Eh, the crayon guy deserved the win," Sam shrugged, setting down her silver trophy. "Seventy-six crayons stuffed into his mouth…genius. Besides, we _did _get the second place prize. Five thousand bucks!"

"Yeah, we _can _buy a few new HDMI cords with that," Freddie smiled.

"_Or _a giant hamster ball," Sam said.

"Okay, well, while you two argue about that, I'm gonna go make sure Spencer's ready with the car," Carly said. "Congrats again, Sam."

"You know, I hope the crayons that guy used were non-toxic," Freddie said. "Or that's going to be one awkward phone call to poison control later today."

"I doubt crayon poisoning is a real thing," Sam said. She stepped closer to Freddie. "Hey…Frednub?"

"What's up?"

Sam bit the corner of her lip as she handed Freddie a wrinkled sheet of paper.

"What's this?" Freddie asked.

"You know how, um, it's our one-year anniversary next month?"

"Of course," Freddie nodded.

"Well, um, that's your gift I've been working on," Sam told him.

"This sheet of paper?"

"No!" Sam said, taking the paper and folding it out. "It's a song I've been writing for you, idiot!"

"Wait, you wrote me a song?" Freddie said.

"Yeah, I've been working on it for weeks," Sam said. "And it's almost done. But, um, I just wanted to let you know that I wasn't planning on never singing for you or anything. I was going to surprise you on our anniversary with this song. Well, I still am. I'm not gonna think of a new present _now_. So just act surprised, okay?"

"Wow, Sam, I-I-"

"Kind of sucks that it won't be that big of a surprise anymore though," Sam said.

"Hey," Freddie said. "It's still going to be the best present ever. You know, when I'm surprised with it next month."


	423. Chapter 423

**AN-This oneshot is actually a little similar to one I posted a couple days ago, where Freddie said he was done with Sam. In this one, though, the couple is dating.**

…

_Guilt_

"What if I dressed him up as Herbert Hoover, and we name the skit Ducks Dressed as Past Presidents?" Gibby said as Carly painted her nails and Sam lazily swung her butter sock in her hand.

"That sounds like the stupidest idea ever," Sam said simply.

"Yeah, um I don't think kids would even know who Herbert Hoover is," Carly said. "Actually, I'm surprised _you _even know who he is."

"What? I can't be educated about European rulers?" Gibby frowned.  
"There we go," Carly smiled.

"Well how come Freddie's lame idea got to be on the show last week?" Gibby asked. "Tech Time with Freddie? My duck idea is at least entertaining!"  
"Because we had a vote about it during our last meeting," Carly sighed. "And since Sam and Freddie are dating, Sam actually voted for it, and I was overpowered."

"Eh, I had to vote for it, the nub already had a rough day," Sam shrugged.

"Why?" Carly asked.

"He, um, got in a fight with his mom," Sam said. "It was actually kind of funny."

"What did they fight about?"

"Well, his mom had bought him these weird tick resistant boxers-"

"They make those?" Carly smirked.

"Either that or Mrs. Benson paid someone to make them specially," Sam shrugged. "Anyway, he said he was never going to wear them, she went crazy, long story short, she wound up going into his room and throwing away all his old underwear and replaced it with the tick boxers, so now he has no choice _but _to wear them."

"Wow," Carly said. "That's, um-"

"Humiliating, isn't it?" Sam grinned. "It's almost as bad as last week when he almost cried because his mom ruined his NugNug action figure by putting it in disinfectant."

Carly and Gibby laughed loudly. Just then, the door to the Shay's apartment opened and Freddie walked in.

"Hey," he said brightly. "Who's ready to shoot a little iCarly?"

"We still need to figure out one more idea," Carly told him.

"Oh, what about another Tech Time with-"

"No!" Sam said firmly. "I'm not getting suckered into that again."

"Gibby suggested another duck bit," Carly said. "But-"

"Oh man, no more ducks!" Freddie moaned. "The last one almost bit me in a _very _inappropriate place!"

"We're not bringing in any ducks, baby," Sam told him.

"Yeah, so don't get your anti-tick boxers in a knot," Gibby said, making him and Carly laugh.

"How-How did you know-Sam!"

"Um…it was a lucky guess?" Sam said lamely.

"Oh come on, it's not a big deal," Carly said quickly. "We all know your mom's crazy, it's not like this is surprising to anyone."

"You still weren't supposed to tell people," Freddie sighed, sitting down next to Sam.

"Don't be so sensitive," Sam said, giving him a quick kiss.

"Yeah, there's no need to cry about it," Gibby said. "It's not like you mom put another action figure in disinfectant."

"You told them I _cried_?" Freddie exclaimed, jumping up.

"Do you not know how to keep your mouth shut, Gibby?" Sam snapped.

"Wait, Sam?" Freddie said slowly. "Why are you telling everyone all the things that I've told you in confidence?"

"It's not that big of a deal," Sam said.

"It is to me," Freddie said seriously, causing Sam to drop her grin. "I tell you things that I'm not comfortable letting anybody else know…and you just go and tell them anyway? What else have you told them that I asked you keep secret?"

"Freddie, come on, they're our friends," Sam reasoned.

"And you're my girlfriend," Freddie replied. "I-I thought I could trust you to keep some things between just us. But I don't know what else I've said to you that you just turn around and blast to everybody."

"I-I don't tell them _important _things," Sam said. "Just funny stuff."

"How am I supposed to know that now?" Freddie said.

"Freddie," Sam sighed. "Don't-"

"I've got to go," Freddie said, turning towards the door.

"Where are you going?" Sam asked.

"For a walk, I need to think," Freddie said. He looked back at Sam. "And be alone."

Sam stood still as the apartment door closed behind him.

"Um, Sam?" Carly said gently. "You okay?"

"Y-Yeah," Sam nodded. She turned and headed towards the stairs.

Carly sighed. "She's not okay."

"So…would this be a bad time to bring up my duck idea again?" Gibby asked.

"Gibby!"

…

Freddie sat alone at a table at the Groovy Smoothie the next day, playing with the straw of his smoothie distractedly. He almost didn't notice Carly enter the restaurant and sit down at his table.

"Hey," Carly smiled at him.

"Oh, hi," Freddie replied.

"So," Carly said hesitantly. "How are you feeling? You know, after yesterday?"

Freddie shrugged.

"You're not still mad at Sam, are you?"

"I don't know," Freddie said. "It's just, we've been dating for awhile now, and I've started to feel really comfortable telling her all these things I've never been able to tell another person before. But then I find out she just goes and tells them to everybody. It's like she doesn't care about the trust I put in our relationship."

"Well, it's not entirely her fault," Carly said. "Sometimes I _do _prod her a little bit to tell me stuff."

"But that doesn't make it okay," Freddie said.

"Come on," Carly reasoned. "You still love her."

"I do," Freddie agreed. "But that doesn't change the fact that she didn't care enough to not talk about what I say to her when we're alone."

"Well, if it makes any difference, Sam's been pretty upset since you left yesterday," Carly told him. "I think she feels guilty about your fight."

"It wasn't much of a fight," Freddie said simply.

"Well either way, she's not exactly her usual loud, crazy self," Carly said, getting to her feet. "Oh, and are you still up for shooting iCarly tonight? I compromised with Gibby and told him he could dress his cat up like an old president instead of a wild duck."

"Yeah, I'll be there," Freddie assured her.

…

"So is your cat ready, Gib?" Carly asked that evening as the teens prepared in the iCarly studio.

"Yeah, he's just in the back working on his act," Gibby said. "Boy…they really know how to make you proud, don't they?"

"Yeah…" Carly frowned. "Well, once Sam gets here I guess we can go ahead and start."  
Right on cue, Sam came into the studio. She stopped at Freddie's tech cart.

"Um, hi," she said softly.

"Hi," Freddie replied, barely making eye contact with her.

Sam sighed and headed over to Carly.

Carly could almost feel her heart break for her best friend.

"Are you ready to start?" Carly asked Freddie.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded, picking up his camera. "In five, four, three, two…"

"Hey there, Internet!" Carly said happily. "I'm Carly!"

"And I'm Sam!" Sam echoed. "And this is…"

"iCarly!"

"We have a really great show for you all tonight," Carly smiled at the camera. "Gibby's cat will be making an appearance-"

Sam pushed the 'boo' button on her remote.

"Hey!" Gibby yelled indignantly from behind the tech cart where he was standing.

"But before we get to any of that," Carly said, looking at Sam. "Sam would like to say something."

Giving her best friend a reassuring smile, Carly headed over to Freddie.

"This isn't in the script," Freddie whispered to her.

"Just watch," Carly told him.

"Um, so you all know me and iCarly's tech producer Freddie have been going out for awhile," Sam began looking a little hesitant. "Nine months, two weeks and five days, to be exact."

"What is she-" Freddie started, but Carly quickly hushed him.

"So, um, since we're going out, me and Freddie obviously tell each other things that we wouldn't tell anybody else," Sam continued. "And that is actually one of my favorite parts of dating him, that he trusts me enough to tell me that stuff. But, um, I kind of screwed up with that. Sometimes I tell the things that Freddie tells me in private to other people, and I didn't think it's that big of a deal. But Freddie does, and until recently, I didn't realize how much faith he had to have had in our relationship in the first place to tell me these things."

She looked right at her boyfriend "Freddie, I'm really, really sorry I betrayed your trust by telling people things that you told me you didn't want anyone else to know. It was wrong of me, and I shouldn't have done it. But, um, since there's really no way for me to ever go back and _not _say anything, I guess I'll do the next best thing. I told your secrets that you told only me, so I'll tell everyone the things I told only you."

She took a deep breath. "Until I was nine years old, I couldn't sleep with the lights off because I was terrified of the dark, and then I had to have a little night light on in my room until I was thirteen."  
Behind him, Freddie heard Gibby snicker, but he simply stood there, shocked.

"My mom used to pretend I was an orphan she adopted from a made up country to use me to get dates with social workers," Sam continued. "The reason why I hate being called Samantha and will hit anybody who calls me that instead of Sam is because-"

"Here, take this," Freddie said, thrusting the camera into Carly's hands and running out to Sam.

"Sam…what are you doing?" he asked softly.

"Making us even," Sam said. "I-I hate having you mad at me like this."

"But, Sam," Freddie said. "You-You only told my secrets to Carly and Gibby…You just told yours to the entire Internet."

Sam shrugged. "I don't care."

"Wow," Freddie whispered, stepping closer to her. "That-That was really-Come here."

He closed the small gap between them and wrapped his arms around her, leaning down to kiss her.

"Aw, isn't that sweet?" Carly smiled, turning the camera onto herself. "Now, before any Seddiers start to go wild, please enjoy this prerecorded video of a baby laughing so hard he falls down."

She quickly pressed a button on Freddie's laptop before setting the camera down.

"So are you guys good again?" she asked as the couple pulled apart.

Freddie nodded, still not taking his eyes off Sam. "Yeah, we're good."

"I really am sorry," Sam whispered.

"I know," Freddie said. "And I appreciate what you just did. It means a lot to me. But I feel bad that now everyone knows you used to be afraid of the dark."

"Eh, I can teach anyone who has something to say about it a lesson or two," Sam shrugged. She craned her neck up to give him another kiss. "Listen, from now on I promise that anything you say to me in confidence, no matter what it is, will never get told to anybody. Ever."

"Thank you," Freddie said earnestly. "And I promise that you can tell me anything too without worrying I'll repeat it."

"Okay, great, you two are happy," Gibby said. "Can I bring out my cat now?"

"Um actually Gib, this wound up taking longer than I thought," Carly said. "We're going to have to cut out your cat bit."

"What?" Gibby exclaimed. "But he was so excited he! He actually ate breakfast with me this morning!"

"Get over it," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Your cat has no talent, just like you."

"At least I didn't have to sleep with a nightlight until I was-ow!"

Sam had chucked her remote right into Gibby's stomach.

"You, um, sort of had that coming," Carly said, helping him up.


	424. Chapter 424

**AN-Just to be on the safe side, I'm gonna go ahead and say this oneshot is rated T. This one focuses more on Tyler, since he does seem to get a little neglected in these oneshots. I have another one about him that should be up either tomorrow or the next day. Hope you like it!**

…

_Tab_

"I'm gonna kill him."

"Sam," Freddie sighed. "Calm down."

"No!" Sam snapped. "I will _not _calm down! It's three in the morning and Tyler still isn't back yet."

"It's, um, actually two-fifteen," Freddie said lamely.

"Who cares?" Sam exclaimed. "His curfew was over an hour ago! _And _he's not picking up his cellphone. I swear, when he gets his sorry butt back here…"

"Well maybe he lost track of time," Freddie reasoned.

"Are you _kidding _me here?" Sam frowned. "Since when are you the laid back parent? Anytime Emma or Ashton were five minutes late coming home you were down here ready to chew them out!"

"Well I-"

"Oh I know what it is," Sam said, crossing her arms. "You're _glad _your son is out there partying it up because _you _never got to do that in high school, right?"

"No!" Freddie said. "I am not glad he's out there partying it up with the popular kids…but-but-"

"Save it," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

Just then they heard a key in the front door and a second later their sixteen-year old son walked in.

"Oh, look who's back!" Sam yelled, glaring at the boy who towered over her now.

"Um…hi?" Tyler said.

"Hi? _Hi_?" Sam exclaimed. "_That's _what you say after you come home over an hour late?"

"Oh…about that," Tyler said. "See, I was _about _to leave the party, but then, um, I got to talking to this girl, and she was _really _hot. And she asked me if I wanted to make-out for awhile. What was I supposed to do?"

"Say no!"

"Mom, please, she was practically a model," Tyler said. "You don't say no when an almost-model wants to make-out with you."  
"You do when you have a curfew!"

"I've been meaning to talk to you about that," Tyler replied. "See…this one in the morning thing isn't working out for me. How about we extend that to three?"

"To three? Are you-Freddie!" Sam cried, turning to her husband who, until that moment, had been trying hard to stay out of this. "Deal with him! I want him grounded, something taken away from him, and-and-ugh! Just punish him! I'm going to bed before I wind up punching the wall."

Freddie sighed as Sam stormed up the steps.

"Um…is mom mad at me or something?" Tyler asked.

"Okay Ty," Freddie said. "Here's the thing…you _did _miss curfew."

"Dad, no other kid my age has a curfew anymore," Tyler moaned.

"Right, so all your friend's parents just let them run wild all night long?" Freddie said, raising an eyebrow. "And I know for a fact that Kirby and Huey have the same curfew as you. And I never have to hear your Uncle Gibby complaining that his kids don't obey it."

"That's because their dad is easier to trick," Tyler said. "They always just change the time on his watch before they go out."  
"Um…I'll pretend I didn't hear that," Freddie said. "Look, your mom gets worried when you don't come home on time."

"I'm only an hour late," Tyler said.

"And do you know what was going on in your mom's head for that hour?" Freddie said. "And mine? I get that you're young and popular and like to have fun, but _please _next time get home when you're supposed to."

"Fine," Tyler conceded. "Whatever."

…..

"So I don't get how they get the cream _in _the cupcake," Gibby's fifteen-year old son, Huey said, taking a bite into his cream filled cupcake. "It's got to be pretty hard, right?"

"There's a machine, genius," Tyler said.

"What's the machine do?"

"I don't know!" Tyler snapped.

"Why are you all peeved off?" Gibby's other son, seventeen-year old Kirby asked.

"My mom flipped out that I got home late last weekend from that party the basketball team threw for making it to regionals," Tyler sighed. "She grounded me from going out tonight."

"But tonight's Leslie Ford's party!" Huey exclaimed. "The hot cheerleader's! Her parent's are in Olympia so this party's bound to be huge!"

"Don't rub it in," Tyler said darkly as the front door to the Benson house opened.

"What's up baby bro?" Emma said, walking into the room.

"Aren't you supposed to be in college?" Tyler asked.

"It's called a long weekend," Emma said, thumping the back of his head. "Hi to you too."

"Mom and dad never said you were coming home," Tyler said.

"Because I'm surprising them," Emma said. She turned to Huey and Kirby. "Quincy's home too, by the way. I just dropped him off at your place."

"Awesome! That means mom and dad will break out the good trout for dinner tonight!" Huey grinned.

"Yeah, you're weird…" Emma frowned. She looked back at her younger brother. "Why so bummed, kid?"

"I'm grounded," Tyler sighed.

"Oh yeah, mom told me about that," Emma chuckled. "She was _pissed_."

"Well now I have to miss the biggest party of the year," Tyler said.

"Dude, you're so stupid," Emma said, rolling her eyes.

"Why?" Tyler asked, confused.

"Come on, you're sixteen years old, you're telling me you still haven't figured out how to work mom and dad?" Emma said, shaking her head. "Listen, _mom's _the one mad at you. Not dad. I talked to him yesterday and he's not bothered at all that you missed curfew. Which is _totally _unfair, because whenever I came home late I got lectured for hours…but whatever."

"I'm still not getting what you're saying," Tyler said.

"Just guilt dad into letting you go to the party," Emma said. "Dad's easy to win over."

"Yeah for you," Tyler scoffed. "All you and Ash ever have to do is bat your little eyelashes and say 'Please daddy?'"

"Alright fine, have fun staying home tonight," Emma shrugged.

"Hey did I hear someone at the door?" Freddie asked as him and Sam came into the room. "Who was-Emma!"

"Hi!" Emma said brightly, hugging her parents.

"What are you doing here?" Sam asked as she greeted her daughter.

"We have a four day weekend at school, so Quince and I decided why not drive back home and surprise our parents," Emma explained.

"Well we're so glad you're here, sweetie," Freddie said.

"Yeah, this is great," Sam agreed. "Wait, this is perfect, actually. You busy today?"

"I mean I have finals in a few weeks," Emma said.

Her and her mother waited a moment before both bursting into laughter.

"Good one, Em," Sam grinned while Freddie rolled his eyes. "But seriously, I have this coupon for the spa that expires today. I got it from winning that chicken wing eating contest last month."

"You want to go to the _spa_?" Freddie smirked.

"They have Peruvian mud baths there!" Sam defended.

"You mean we could sit in fancy mud?" Emma asked. "Sweet!"

"Yeah, I was gonna break down and ask Carly if she wanted to go with me, but now that you're here I'll just go with you," Sam said. "This way I won't get forced to sit through facials and salt rubs or whatever other weird chiz they have there."

"Done!" Emma said.

"Good," Sam said. "Go grab your swimsuit and let's go."

"Have fun you two," Freddie said. "And hey, I'll have some Meat Slam pizzas waiting for you guys when you get home."

"Dude, now's your chance," Kirby whispered to Tyler as Sam and Emma left. "Ask your dad about letting you go to the party."

"I don't know…" Tyler said slowly.

"Come on, you know who's going to be at that party?" Huey said. "Leslie Ford!"

"Yes," Tyler frowned. "Obviously. It's at her house!"

"Exactly," Huey grinned.

"Look, just go ask your dad," Kirby urged him. "What harm will it do to _ask_. The worse he could do is say no."

Tyler sighed. "Yeah…okay. Hang on."

He got to his feet and headed over to his father who had gone into the kitchen.

"Hey, dad," Tyler said. "Great that Emma's home, isn't it?"

"Yeah, it is," Freddie agreed. "Too bad Jason and Ashton aren't here, though. It would be great to have everyone together again. But I guess that's what happens when your kids grow up. They get their own lives and-"

"Yeah, yeah, that's real sad," Tyler said quickly before his father got sidetracked. "Listen, I wanted to ask you something."

"Shoot," Freddie said.

"Well, um, see…there's this party tonight," Tyler began. "At the head cheerleader's house. It's supposed to be huge. Everyone's going to be there."  
"Ty," Freddie sighed. "You're grounded. I'm sorry."  
"But dad, hear me out," Tyler said. "If I don't go to that party…I'm ruined!"

"How exactly would you be _ruined_?" Freddie asked, amused.

"I'm a first string football player," Tyler said. "But see, to maintain my spot on first string, I need to keep up my social standing as well. No one wants an unpopular football player; that's crazy!"

"Your argument skills amaze me," Freddie said, his voice dripping in sarcasm.

"And if I don't go to this party, my popularity is shot," Tyler continued, ignoring his father's comment. "Which means I'll go down to second string. Which means that when college scouts start coming to my games next year, they won't get a chance to see me play, and then they won't recruit me, and then I'll be out of a scholarship opportunity and you and mom will never get rid of me! So see, I'm not asking to go to this party for fun. I'm asking to go for the sake of my _future_."

"You are _definitely _your mom's son," Freddie said, shaking his head.

"Dad, please?" Tyler sighed. "It's just a harmless party."  
Freddie bit his lip. Sam would have a cow if she knew he was even remotely considering letting Tyler go out tonight. But then again…she did make a valid point last week when she said that Freddie sort of liked the fact that his son was so popular. His son was getting to live the life that his own mother would've never let him live. He had never gotten invited to parties every weekend or had cheerleaders practically throwing themselves at him. He didn't want to ruin that for Tyler. But Sam _had _grounded him. He knew he should stand by his wife's decision.

_Wait…Sam's not going to be here tonight_, Freddie thought to himself. _She has to take care of her mom all night after she gets back from getting another wart removed and will be all hopped up on loopy gas. She won't be back home until at least midnight tonight! She would never know…_

"Okay," Freddie said finally. "This is the deal. You either take it or leave it. No negotiating. You can go to the party-"

"What? Yes! Dad, you're the-"

"_But_ you are home by twelve on the dot, do you hear me?" Freddie said firmly. "Not twelve thirty, not twelve fifteen, not even twelve-o-five. Twelve. You got it?"

"Yeah, totally, no worries," Tyler said.

"And do _not _mention this to your mom," Freddie said. "Ever."

"Please, I'm not suicidal," Tyler grinned.

…

"He's so dead," Freddie said, pacing back and forth in the living room later that evening. It was ten past twelve and Tyler still had not returned from his party. Sam wasn't back yet either, but it was only a matter of time.

He flung himself down on the couch, looking around at his empty house.

Him and Emma had actually had a pretty good evening. After Sam had left to go take care of her mom, him and her had watched _Galaxy Wars_ for awhile, but then she went to go say hello to Quincy's parents, and Freddie knew she wouldn't be back for quite some time.

Just then he heard a car door slam outside and he bolted to peak out the window, praying it was Tyler.

His heart sank when he saw Sam walking up the driveway.

_I should've never let him go_, Freddie cursed himself. _Sam is going to murder me…_

"My mother's crazier than ever!" Sam announced as she let herself into the house.

"H-Hey baby," Freddie said. "Rough day?"

"All that stress I got rid of at that mud bath with Emma just came right back," Sam said. "I didn't think she could get any weirder, but she proved me wrong."

"What happened?" Freddie asked.

"Let's see, she tried to convince the delivery man that brought her prescriptions to marry her, she yelled at the cat for looking at her too long, she tried to boil an egg in the microwave…the list just goes on and on."

"She's just hoped up on meds from her wart removal surgery," Freddie told her.

"Next time I'm making Melanie fly up to take care of her," Sam mumbled. She collapsed onto the couch. "Emma over at Gibby's?"

"Uh-huh," Freddie said. "But her and I had a nice _Galaxy Wars _marathon, so that was fun."

"Good," Sam smiled. "And where's Ty?"

"Um…" Freddie said slowly. "He's-"

"Probably up moping in his room because he's grounded," Sam said, shaking her head.

"Um…okay," Freddie said lamely.

"Well hopefully he learned his lesson," Sam yawned. "Anyway, I'm exhausted. I think I'm gonna head to bed. You coming?"

"Um, I think I'll stay up a little while longer," Freddie said. "You know, maybe start working on our taxes."

"They're not due for another six months," Sam frowned.

"Well you know how I like to keep tabs on all our finances," Freddie said. "Just to make sure we're not about to plummet into bankruptcy."

"Whatever," Sam shrugged. "Night baby."

"Night," Freddie replied.

_Okay Tyler, you'd better get your butt home soon, or_-

Just as Sam had disappeared upstairs, the front door opened again and Emma walked in.

"Hey," she whispered.

"Hey," Freddie sighed.

"Is mom up?" Emma asked.

"Um, no," Freddie frowned. "Why?"

"Oh, you'll see," Emma said turning back to front step outside the door. "Get in here!"

"Who are you-Oh you've got to be _kidding_ me."

Emma dragged in her younger brother into the house. Tyler stumbled in, laughing happily.

"Dad!" he said, throwing his arms around his father. "Wow, it's you!"

"Is he _drunk_?" Freddie asked Emma as Tyler fell back onto the couch.

"Yeah," Emma nodded. "Me and Quincy just picked him up from some party. Luckily he had enough sense to call me to come and get him. Quincy's taking home his brothers, they're just as bad as he is."

"Okay, Tyler, you're _more _than grounded now!" Freddie hissed, trying to keep his voice down so Sam wouldn't hear. "I was _nice _and let you go out when you weren't supposed to and _this _is how you repay me?"

"You have really brown eyes, dad," Tyler laughed. "They look like pools of mud."

"Ugh!"

"Well, I'd rather not be down here when mom chews his head off," Emma said. "Give me the highlights tomorrow though. Night, daddy!"

"Wait, help me get him-" Freddie started, but Emma had already gone upstairs.

"Alright Tyler, get up please," Freddie said, trying to be patient.

"But I'm so comfy," Tyler replied.

"Tyler…" Freddie said. "You're already grounded for the rest of your life. Don't-"

"I forgot all about my Meat Slam pizza in the fridge," Freddie suddenly heard Sam say, coming down the stairs. "I'm just gonna grab a slice before-Tyler?"

"Mom!" Tyler exclaimed. "What's up?"

"Sam, um, I know this looks bad," Freddie said. "But, um-"

"What's going on here?" Sam asked slowly.

"Um-"

"Mom, are my thumbs the same size?" Tyler asked, holding up his hands. "Once feels bigger…"

"Oh my God, he's drunk!" Sam said, turning to Freddie. "He was at that party! You let him go out!"

"He-He makes really convincing arguments, okay!" Freddie defended. "And I didn't know there was going to be drinking! I thought they would just dance and play spin the bottle and charades and-"

"What kind of parties have _you _been to?" Sam frowned. "Wait…did he _drive _home?"

"No, he called Emma to pick him up," Freddie said quickly.

"At least he had _some _sense," Sam mumbled. She turned back to her son. "Alright Tyler, let's go, time for bed. Sleep this off and I'll deal with you when you're coherent enough to understand my yelling."

She took Tyler's arm and helped him to his feet and started for the stairs with him.

Freddie blinked. He had been expecting much worse. Sam seemed pretty…_calm _about this whole thing. He knew she would rip Tyler apart tomorrow, but right now she seemed to be handling the situation pretty well.

He went upstairs after the two of them and went into his and Sam's bedroom. Sam joined him a few moments later.

"You never get to give me the 'united front' lecture again," Sam said.

"I'm sorry," Freddie sighed. "I just wanted him to have fun."

"Since when have you been the fun parent?" Sam scoffed. "_I'm _the fun parent, and you're the geeky dad."

"I just can't believe I let our son get drunk at some party," Freddie said heavily. "What kind of parent am I? This is just so unbelievable…we never had these problems with the other three."

"Um…yeah," Sam said lamely.

Freddie looked up at her. "What?"

"Nothing," Sam said quickly.

"Why aren't you more mad?" Freddie asked slowly. "Last week you were _fuming _when Tyler was an hour late coming home and this week he shows up drunk and you're fine."

"I'm not _fine_," Sam said. "I'll yell at him tomorrow. Jeez, calm down, Fredwad."

"Sam," Freddie said, knowing the expression on his wife's face. "What are you hiding?"

Sam sighed. "Okay…but before I tell you…just keep in mind that the statue of limitations for you to be mad about everything is way past."

"What is 'everything'?" Freddie frowned.

Sam took a deep breath. "I'm not exactly _new _to this situation."

"What do you mean?" Freddie asked, confused.

"You-You know how you said we never had this problem with the other three?" Sam said sheepishly. "Um, well, that's sort of not entirely true…"

"What?" Freddie exclaimed. "Jason and the twins never did this!"

"Y-Yeah," Sam said. "They kind of did. And I knew you'd probably overreact, so-so I just never mentioned it to you."

"Wait," Freddie said, closing his eyes. "You're telling me Jason and the twins came home drunk and I never even knew about it? My kids were hoodlums and I never was informed?!"

"They were not hoodlums," Sam said. "They did it _once_, I handled it, they never did it again."

"Oh my blood pressure," Freddie said, sitting down on the bed. "How-When-"

"When Jason was seventeen," Sam sighed. "He called me to pick him up from some party because he had too much to drink."

"Jason's our _good _one!" Freddie cried.

"I picked him up from some party the _robotics_ club threw, I think he still qualifies as our good one," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "But you were asleep by the time we got home. The next morning I talked to him, I grounded him, and he never did that again."

"What about the twins?" Freddie asked shakily.

"You remember that weekend when Ashton was sixteen that she suddenly became _very _helpful and washed both our cars, cleaned out the garage and organized the attic?" Sam said. "Well that's because her and Clarissa decided to indulge themselves on Carly's wine collection while she was out of town and that was my punishment."

"Nooo," Freddie moaned. "What about Emma?"

"You sure you want me to tell you?" Sam asked.  
"I need to hear," Freddie nodded. "Lay it on me."

"Well when she was seventeen her soccer team decided a good way for them to celebrate winning their biggest match of the year was to drink a bunch of beers that one of her teammate's sisters bought for them," Sam said. "Which is why that weekend she mowed the lawn and painted the basement."

"Oh my God…" Freddie said. "Our children went wild."

"No they didn't," Sam said. "They were stupid, sure, but they were still good kids. And Tyler's still a good kid too. He's gonna give us gray hair by the time he graduates, but he's still good. We'll talk to him tomorrow and we _will _punish him, but he's still the sweet kid who almost cries at the end of any movie where a dog died."

"Yeah," Freddie sighed. "I guess. But when you say we're punishing him-"

"Oh, we'll pull out our best stuff," Sam assured him. "My car needs waxing and the rain gutters need cleaning for starters. And he's going to be missing the next _several _parties."

"Good," Freddie said approvingly. He laid back on the bed. "Teenagers are the worst."

"Thanks for the update," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I had no idea."


	425. Chapter 425

_Popping_

"Carly! Carly, get down here!"

"What?" Carly asked, coming downstairs to where he brother was standing in the middle of the living room. "I was cleaning out my closet."

"Sam's _broken_!" Spencer hissed. "Look!"

He pointed over to the kitchen table, where Sam was working away on her laptop, scribbling every now and then into a notebook.

"She's not _broken_," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "She's doing _homework_."

"Exactly!" Spencer exclaimed. "Sam doesn't do homework!"

"Yes she does," Carly chuckled walking into the kitchen and looking over her best friend's shoulder. "When her boyfriend guilts her into doing it, right Sam?"

"Freddie's a nub," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"How'd he guilt you into doing your homework?" Spencer asked.

"He started giving me a lecture about my 'future' and my 'work-ethic" and blah, blah, blah," Sam mumbled. "This was the only way to shut him up."

"You know, I've been giving you the same lectures for _years_," Carly pointed out. "And you never once listened to me."

"Yeah, well I'm not dating _you,"_ Sam said. "Freddie also said if I finish all my homework for the week he'd take me out La Palace de Amor."

"_You _want to go to the cheesiest romantic restaurant in Seattle?" Carly frowned.

"Pfft, have you _had _their steaks? It's like eating a little piece of heaven," Sam said.

Just then the Shay's door opened up and Freddie walked in. "Hello good people," he said brightly. "What goes on?"

"We're just discussing how you got Sam to do homework for once," Carly replied. "You must have a real gift."

"Yeah, of being annoying," Sam mumbled.

"Thanks baby," Freddie said, leaning down to give her a kiss.

"Ugh! No swapping of teenage spit in my kitchen!" Spencer cringed. "It's where I come to think sometimes!"

"How goes the homework?" Freddie asked, ignoring Spencer's comment.

"Stupid," Sam said. "You better be prepared to buy me six steaks when I finish."

"What assignment are you on now?" Freddie asked.

"I'm writing my dumb paper on the signing of the Declaration of Independence," Sam replied. "I'm almost done, thank God, because I can't _stand _reading about this boring history chiz."

"Hmm, it looks good," Freddie said, looking at the screen. "But, um, Sam? The Declaration was signed in Philadelphia, not Boston."

"What? Yes it was," Sam said. "They signed it and then they all had a tea party."

"The Boston Tea Party wasn't an actual tea party, and it happened _before _the Declaration was even written," Freddie explained. "It was one of the many events that really fueled the Declaration's creation, but-"

"Here, I'll _show _you," Sam said, pulling up a search engine and typing in the question quickly. "You'll see that the-oh."

"See, it says it was signed on July 4th, 1776 in _Philadelphia_," Freddie said.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Sam said, fixing her paper.

"You're also going to need to change the margins," Freddie said. "Mr. Howard prefers .95 inch margins, not one inch. And your font size really should be smaller. And-"

"Would _you _like to write this for me Mr. Perfect?" Sam snapped.

"No," Freddie said quickly. "I just want to make sure that you get everything done right so you can get a good grade."

"Well I can do it on my own, you know," Sam said. "Keep your brain to yourself."

She yanked the flash drive that had been plugged into her computer out.

"Um, you know you're not supposed to just yank those things out," Freddie said. "You need to properly eject them or you can risk losing data."  
Sam glared at him.

"Or I could keep my mouth shut," Freddie added.

"I'm gonna go run to the copy store to print this," Sam said. "My mom broke our printer."

"How?" Spencer asked.

"She hit it with a hammer."

"Ah."

"Well, I'm gonna go upstairs and work on some updates for the iCarly page," Freddie said. "If you need anything-"

"Goodbye, nub," Sam said.

Freddie shook his head as he headed upstairs.

"You see what I'm dealing with?" Sam said as her boyfriend disappeared. "It's always '_Sam, you're doing it wrong_', '_Sam, Canada's a real country'_, _'Sam, don't yank your flash drive out_'."  
"Hey, what just popped up on your computer?" Carly asked.

"Huh? What are you-Uh-oh."

"What is it?" Spencer asked.

"Due to improper removal, any unsaved data on your flash drive may have been lost," Sam read.

"Your report!" Carly exclaimed. "Did it get lost?"

"I don't know," Sam said, quickly plugging her flash drive back in. "Come on, be there, history report…Don't do this to-No! It's gone!"

"Oh no!" Carly gasped.

"Are you sure?" Spencer asked.

"Yes, it's gone!" Sam snapped. "Ugh! Now what do I do?"  
"When's the paper due?" Carly asked.

"Tomorrow!" Sam moaned.

"Oh."

"I can't believe this! I finally do my homework and it disappears!" Sam said. "This is clearly the universe's way of telling me I shouldn't have done it. That paper's due in…fifteen hours and I have nothing to show for it!"

"Well maybe you can-"

"I got it!" Sam suddenly said, her face lighting up. "You can recover documents from your computer!"

"That's right!" Spencer said. "Wait…how?"

"It's some trick Freddie showed me awhile ago," Sam said, pushing a few buttons on her keyboard. "I just…ugh! I can't remember how to do it!"

"I'll go get Freddie and ask him," Carly said, starting for the stairs.

"Don't you dare, Shay!" Sam snapped, causing Carly to stop in her tracks. "I am _not _crawling to Freddie just so he can be right about something else. He doesn't get the satisfaction."

"But Sam, you need your paper," Carly reasoned.

"I'll remember," Sam said. "Maybe it's on this menu…no."

"There's like, a thousand different button combinations it could be," Spencer pointed out. "You're never going to get it."

"Then-Then-I'll rewrite the dang paper!" Sam said firmly.

"It's six pages!" Carly frowned. "Doing it the first time took you three full days."

"Well I'll type faster!" Sam said.

"At least ask Freddie to help you rewrite it then; history is one of his best subjects," Carly said.

"They're all his best subjects!" Sam exclaimed. "And there's no way I'm doing this with his help."

…

Six hours later, was sitting slumped down at her kitchen table, her eyes barely staying open as she stared at the two pages she had done of her report.

"Okay…just four more pages," Sam sighed, downing her last sip of espresso. "You can do this, Puckett. You can-Ugh, no I can't!"

Suddenly there was a knock at her door.

"It's open!" Sam called, figuring her mother had forgotten her keys yet again.

Instead, though, came the pleasant voice of her boyfriend.

"Hey," he smiled at her. He set a large smoothie down in front of her. "I thought you could use a pick-me-up after finally finishing up your big paper. You know, I'm really proud of you, Sam. I know you'll get a good grade on it because you worked harder on it than you have with anything in your whole life."  
Sam narrowed her eyes. "Rub it in, will you?"

"Um…what?" Freddie frowned, confused.

"Okay, Benson, this is how this is gonna work," Sam said firmly. "You're not going to make any snide remarks, you're not gonna gloat, you're not even gonna crack a smile. Got it?"

"Got _what_?" Freddie asked.

Sam took a deep breath. "When I '_improperly removed my flash drive_', I, um, sort of lost my entire paper! And I know you showed me how to recover lost documents but you know I wasn't paying attention and now I can't figure it out and I've been sitting here for the past six hours trying to rewrite my paper but my brain is fried! So sit your nerdy butt down and pull up my paper and keep your dang mouth shut!"

Freddie's face broke into a grin. "Well _sure _I'll help you out, baby."

"Yeah, you won't be thinking this is so funny when I'm popping a few of your teeth out," Sam mumbled as Freddie sat down at her computer. She watched as Freddie pressed a few keys.

"There you go," Freddie said almost instantly. "Now would you like me to show you _again _how to recover documents?"

"No, but I would like to dump this smoothie down your shirt."

"Wait, why did you spend six hours trying to rewrite your paper instead of just calling me over in the first place?" Freddie asked.

"Because I don't need Mr. Perfect coming to my rescue," Sam said.

"I'm not Mr. Perfect," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Yeah, you kind of are," Sam said.

"Come on, we both know I'm a total nerd, I'm awkward in social situations and I have a crazy mother who likes to ruin any joy I might find," Freddie said.

"You also get straight A's, are in a million clubs, all the teachers love you…" Sam added.

"And you're funny, outgoing, tough and don't let anybody stand in your way of doing anything," Freddie said. "You know, to me, Sam, _you're _Ms. Perfect."

"I'm nowhere _near _perfect," Sam scoffed.

"You are to me," Freddie said simply.

Sam stared at him. "I-I am?"

"Of course," Freddie said.

"But I'm messy and loud and mean," Sam said. "And I have to be bribed with steak to do my homework and I have a permanent seat in detention and I-"

"Sam," Freddie said. "There's nothing you can ever say to make me think you're anything less than perfect."

Sam smiled, her cheeks blushing furiously. "No one's ever told me I was perfect before."

"You are," Freddie said, stepping closer to her. "And don't you ever, even for a second, think you're not."


	426. Chapter 426

_Ward_

"Sam, give me a second, I can't remember so many barbecue sauce flavors," Freddie said through his phone, trying to find a pen and paper in his glove compartment as he sat in his parked car.

"It's only six!" Sam said on the other line. "Jeez, your memory has been going downhill ever since you hit forty, nub."

"Thanks," Freddie said, rolling his eye as he grabbed a pen. "Of course _I'm _the one who remembers to empty the trash every week…Okay, let's see, you want classic, tangy, sweet, smoked, hickory and _what _was the last one?"

"Mr. Meaty's Secret Recipe," Sam replied. "I have a feeling it's enriched with ham bits or something."

"Got it," Freddie said, scribbling it down. "I'll make sure I get them for you when I pick up the chicken."

"How long are you gonna be?" Sam asked

"Depends when Tyler's football practice finally lets out," Freddie said. "I thought I was supposed to pick him up at six. It's almost six-thirty!"

"Yeah, those practices always run late," Sam said. "I would always have to wait forever for Emma to finish up with her track ones."

"Well I guess I'll see you whenever I get home then," Freddie sighed. "Love you."

"Love you too."

Freddie hung up his phone and leaned back in his seat. He had been parked outside the high school for nearly half and hour and he was now wishing he had at least brought his Pearpad to entertain himself with.

Finally, though, he spotted his and Sam's fourteen-year old son coming towards the car.

"Hi dad," Tyler said, sliding into the passenger's seat.

"Hey, why'd practice run late?" Freddie asked.

"Coach made us run laps," Tyler replied. "He says we need to be in peak physical form for our big game next week."

"Ah," Freddie nodded. "Well we just need to stop by the chicken place to pick up dinner before we head home."  
"Good, I'm starving," Tyler said.

Freddie chuckled to himself. All of his kids had certainly inherited Sam's appetite.

For a few moments, Freddie drove in silence. As he pulled into the parking lot of the chicken restaurant, though, he looked over at his son and noticed he was staring out the window, deep in thought.

"You okay, Ty?" Freddie asked.

"Oh, yeah," Tyler nodded.

"You sure?" Freddie frowned. "You know, you _can _talk to me. I'm your dad."

Tyler shrugged.

"Okay," Freddie sighed, deciding to drop the subject. "I guess we'll just-"

"Dad? When was the first time you asked a girl out?"

Freddie blinked. "Um…I-I'm not sure. When I was thirteen a girl asked _me _out, but she wasn't so much as interested in _me _as she was in trying to steal our web show. I guess the first girl I actually asked out was your mom. But, um, I guess she technically asked me out too. The first time, that is. She kissed me one night at school and then we dated and then we broke up. But the _second _time _I _asked her out."

"Oh," Tyler said.

"Wait…Tyler, do you want to ask a girl out?" Freddie questioned his son.

"Well, maybe," Tyler conceded. "See, there's this girl in my Algebra class. Her name is Kaley."

"And you like this Kaley?" Freddie grinned.

"I don't know," Tyler mumbled, his face reddening. "She's really pretty. And she laughs at my jokes a lot. And she has a really cute nose."

"Sounds like you like her," Freddie said.

Tyler didn't respond.

"I mean it's a normal thing, for you to start liking girls," Freddie continued. "You remember when we had that talk two years ago? About-"

"Ugh! Can we not?" Tyler cringed.

"Well Tyler, if you really like this girl, then you should ask her out," Freddie said.

"But I don't know how!" Tyler groaned.

"Come on," Freddie smiled. "It's not that hard."

"You only asked out one girl!" Tyler pointed out. "Mom."

"And I married her, didn't I?" Freddie said.

"So I have to marry Kaley?"

"No!" Freddie said quickly. "No, you don't have to marry anyone for a _long _time. But believe it or not, I know _how _to ask a girl out. I just fell in love with your mom and I never needed to ask out another girl."

"So then what do I do?" Tyler asked.

"Well have you ever talked to this girl before?"

"Yeah, all the time, I told you, we have Algebra together," Tyler nodded. "And Geography and English too."

"So then just go up to her and start talking to like you normally would," Freddie told him. "And then maybe, oh, I don't know, ask he if she wants to hang out with you one weekend to get ice cream or see a movie. Just the two of you."

"That doesn't seem so hard," Tyler said.

"Nah, the hardest part is getting the nerve to do it," Freddie replied. "It took me almost a month to ask your mom out after we broke up the first time."

"But what if Kaley says no?"

Freddie squeezed his son's shoulder. "Well then, you learn to move on. I'm not gonna lie, it's not fun to be turned down, but you'll never know what might happen unless you go for it."

"That's such a 'dad' answer," Tyler said, rolling his eyes.

"Sorry," Freddie said. "That's all I got."

…..

"Yes! I'm starving!" Sam said happily as Freddie and Tyler returned home with the chicken. "Did you get my barbecue sauce?"

"Yep, all six of them," Freddie said. "Who has the bad memory now?"

"Congratulations, nub," Sam smiled, giving her husband a quick kiss. "Now let's eat. Can you set the table, Tyler?"

"In a minute!" Tyler called over his shoulder as he ran upstairs.

"Where's he going?" Sam frowned.

"Oh I don't, know, maybe to call _someone_," Freddie beamed.

"What?"

"Oh, nothing," Freddie said.

"Dude…" Sam sighed.

"Okay, okay, I'll tell you," Freddie said. "It's actually pretty cute…our little guy's growing up."  
"Can you get on with it?" Sam snapped.

"Tyler has a crush," Freddie whispered. "On a girl named Kaley."

Sam gasped. "What?"

"Yeah, me and him had a nice little father-son chat," Freddie nodded. "He told me about how he likes her a lot and that he wants to ask her out. Like on a date."

"Oh my God…" Sam grinned. "That's so sweet!"

"I know," Freddie agreed.

"So what'd you tell him to do?" Sam asked.

"Oh, I told him to ask her to do something just the two of them," Freddie replied. "You know, like get ice cream or something."  
"Wait…" Sam said, her smile faltering. "You told him to ask her out then?"

"Well…yeah," Freddie nodded.

"Dude!" Sam hissed, swatting him on the shoulder. "Not cool!"

"Ow! What did I do?"

"You're letting Tyler date!"

"He's fourteen, I thought that was the age we agreed to let the kids start dating," Freddie pointed out. "I _tried _to move it up to thirty when the twins wanted to date but you told me I was being _unreasonable_."

"But Tyler's my last kid, you can't make him grow up this quick!" Sam snapped.

"Well Sam, you can't just not let him grow up," Freddie said, amused.

"Watch me," Sam said.

"He's fourteen, it's probably gonna be three or four dates before he even works up enough courage to hold a girl's hand," Freddie said. "He's not gonna go elope or anything."

Sam didn't reply.

"Hey, he's just growing up, not leaving you," Freddie told her, wrapping his arms around her.

"I know," Sam sighed. "It's just…it seems like yesterday he was trying to make some special shampoo to ward off cooties. Now he's going off and dating girls. I mean, it was sad when Jason started getting interested in girls and when the twins started dating, but I kept telling myself at least I had Tyler left. And now he's going off…"

"You can always have another kid," Freddie joked.

"Funny," Sam smirked. "If we have another kid, _you're _carrying it for the nine months."

….

"Where's dad?" Tyler yelled, running into the house the next day after school. "Is he home?"

"He's at work still," Sam said, looking up from the laundry she was folding. "What's up?"

"I asked out a girl!" Tyler said proudly.

"Oh, Kaley?" Sam asked.

"How'd you know her name?" Tyler frowned.

"Your dad's not exactly _good _at keeping secrets," Sam smiled. "But come, sit, tell me. So you asked her out? What'd she say?"

"She said yes!" Tyler grinned.

"Wow, congratulations, Ty," Sam said, trying to hide her sadness about the fact that it looked like her baby was officially growing up. "So where are you two gonna go?"

"The movies," Tyler replied. "We're gonna go on Saturday. Is that okay?"

"Yeah, that's fine," Sam nodded. "Do you need a ride?"

"I was gonna ask dad to drive us," Tyler said. "I can't wait to tell him! Oh, I have to call Kirby and Huey and tell them!"

Sam watched as her youngest child ran upstairs and let out a long sigh.

Yup, he really was growing up. Whether she liked it or not.

….

"Make sure he has money," Sam said to Freddie on the Saturday of Tyler's date. "And make sure he doesn't see anything rated R. And make sure-"

"Sam, relax, it'll be fine," Freddie assured her.

"Alright, let's go, I told Kaley we'd pick her up at six, dad," Tyler said, running downstairs wearing a new button down shirt and jeans.

"Whoa, did you empty an entire bottle of cologne on yourself?" Sam coughed.

"Dad told me to borrow some of his!" Tyler said.

"I said to use a couple of sprays," Freddie said. "Go try and wash some of that off before we go. You don't want to give Kaley an Asthma attack."

"Poor kid, he really has no clue what he's doing," Sam chuckled. She turned to Freddie. "Hey…take a picture of them, will you?"

"Why?" Freddie asked.

"I want to see the girl!" Sam said. "I at least get to know who he's dating, don't I?"

"I'll try to sneak a pic," Freddie smiled.

"And remember, the movie's supposed to end at eight thirty so pick them up on time," Sam told him. "And-And make sure his shoes are tied before he gets out of the car. I swear, that kid must have a gift for getting his laces untied. I don't want him to trip or something tonight. That would devastate him…"

Freddie looked at his wife and noticed that she looked almost like she did when they sent Jason and the twins off to college.

Tyler really was their last kid. And as tough of a front as Sam still liked to put up, Freddie knew that when the time came when Tyler really would grow up completely, she would be a mess.

"Okay, I scrubbed off the cologne," Tyler said, returning downstairs. "Can I go now?"

"Well I'm not about to gag on the scent, so I think you're good," Freddie told him.

"Have fun, okay sweetie?" Sam smiled.

"I will," Tyler said. "Come on dad, we have to go get Kaley!"

"Okay," Freddie said. "Let's-Oh no."

"What?" Tyler frowned as Freddie looked down at his phone.

"I just got a text from my boss," Freddie said. "I have to run into work for a couple hours. Now."

"But you have to take me and Kaley to the movies!" Tyler moaned.

"Well your mom can take you, right Sam?" Freddie pointed out.

"Um, yeah, I'm not doing anything," Sam nodded.

"Well then come on, mom, let's go. I can't be late!" Tyler said.

"Tell me everything tonight," Freddie said to Tyler.

"I will!"

"Why's your boss calling you in on a Saturday?" Sam asked Freddie. "That's kind of jerky of him."

"Yeah, well, that's what bosses do," Freddie shrugged.

…..

"I _love _dating girls!" Tyler announced a couple hours later as him and Sam walked back into the house.

"So you had fun then?" Freddie grinned, turning off the T.V.

"Oh yeah," Tyler grinned. "You know, dad, I thought dating was gonna be hard, the way you talked about it, but I'm so good at it!"

"You-You weren't nervous?" Freddie frowned.

"No way! Get this, when I walked her up to her house from mom's car, I even got to kiss her!" Tyler said. "On the lips! For three whole seconds."

"Oh…" Freddie said. "Well, um, glad you had a good time."

"Look what you created," Sam said, sitting down next to Freddie as Tyler ran upstairs.

"Well what kid isn't awkward and weird during his first date?" Freddie defended. "I didn't know he'd be so good at this!"

"Wonder where he got it from," Sam said. "Neither of us had too much experience when we were his age."  
"Who knows," Freddie shrugged.

"So," Sam said. "How was work?"

"Huh?" Freddie said, confused. "What do you-Oh, yeah, work. Yeah, that was…pleasant."

"Cut the act, Fredwad, I know you made up that whole text message thing," Sam said.

"You-You do?"

"Yeah," Sam smiled. "You lied so I could take Tyler on his first date."

"Well, I-I took Jason on his," Freddie pointed out. "And Emma. I was ahead two to one."

Sam rolled her eyes, leaning over to kiss him.

"Thanks," she whispered. "I needed that."


	427. Chapter 427

_Negative_

"Well, now I can never look at clowns the same way!" Freddie announced as him and Sam walked into the Shay's apartment.

"Why?" Carly frowned.

"Sam forced me to see _Revenge of Killer Clowns Two,_" Freddie shuddered.

"It was a good movie!" Sam defended. "Besides, I conveniently timed that third make-out session so you wouldn't have to see Bobo chop that green-haired clown's head off."

"Aw," Freddie smiled. "Thanks."

"I can't believe you made him see a horror movie," Carly said, rolling her eyes as the two sat down on the couch.

"It's better than that stupid movie she took me to last week with the two leprechauns who thought the presidents stole their gold," Freddie said.

"That movie was hilarious!" Sam defended.

"It made no sense!" Freddie scoffed.

"Exactly!"

"You picked the movie you guys saw for your date night two weeks in a row?" Carly said.

"I always pick," Sam shrugged. "I have better taste."

"You do not!" Freddie said. "That crab restaurant you made us go to last week practically gave me food poisoning! I don't think a food inspector had ever stepped foot into that place!"

"Well you didn't want to go to that barbecue place I love!" Sam said.

"I always leave smelling like ribs!"

"And that's a problem _why_?"

"Well, guys, if I could step in…" Carly said, breaking up the couple's argument.

"What is it?" Sam sighed, knowing that her best friend was going to step in no matter what she said.

"Well, I couldn't help but notice that it seems lately whatever you guys do is _Sam's _choice," Carly pointed out.

"_Very _good observation, Carls," Freddie smirked, raising an eyebrow at his girlfriend.

"Well like I said, I have better taste," Sam snapped.

"I'm just saying maybe it would be nice if _sometimes _Freddie picked what you guys do on your dates and stuff," Carly said. "You know, maybe you could do some stuff he likes."  
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, you already _tried _this, Carly," Sam said. "And we broke up!"

"Yeah, maybe that isn't such a good idea," Freddie agreed.

"Well that was when you had only been together a couple of weeks," Carly reasoned. "You were both still new to the relationship thing. It was stupid to think you could do something as advanced as partake in the other's activities at that stage. But now you've been back together for almost six months. You're a more experienced _wiser _couple. I think you can handle it. Besides, if this relationship is going to continue, you can't just keep doing what only Sam wants."  
"Dang it, Carly! I had a good ride going there!" Sam groaned.

"Well…couldn't we give it a try?" Freddie asked Sam. "Maybe?"

Sam turned to him. "I-I _guess _it's only fair that you get to do something you really want to on a date. You're the one paying, after all. But I'm not doing another train club meeting!"

…..

"Well, whatever you're planning on doing tonight better not be fancy," Sam said, walking into the Benson's apartment wearing her usual jeans and boots. "Because I'm not changing."

"What your wearing is fine," Freddie assured her, giving her a quick kiss. "You look just as beautiful as ever. Besides, tonight, we're not even leaving the apartment."

"Um, please tell me your batty mother is working late then," Sam frowned.

"Yes," Freddie chuckled. "She's working the graveyard shift at the hospital. She won't be back until at least two in the morning."

"Okay then, sweet!" Sam grinned, flopping down on the plastic covered sofa. "So what are we doing?"

"Well, you said you didn't want to go to a train club meeting," Freddie said, setting a box down on the coffee table. "So I thought I could bring the train club meting to us!"

He opened the box to reveal a model train kit.

"You want to build trains?" Sam asked.

"Uh-huh," Freddie nodded happily. "This is a 1896 Steel Rover. Back in the day, it used to carry materials such as wood, cattle, and wool to states via the newly constructed railway system that had been created as a result of such a giant population expansion. And of course its first trip was on-"

"Ugh! Can't you be a normal guy and just want to make-out all night?" Sam groaned.

"This is my most difficult model to build," Freddie said excitedly, ignoring Sam's comment as he began to take out all the pieces. "But with the two of us working on it, I think we can be done in six hours. Tops."

"Can't we at least turn the T.V. on?" Sam asked.

"And ruin the train building experience? No way!" Freddie said. "Oh, and I brought us official Training Bros hats to wear while we-"

"I'm not wearing that hat," Sam said firmly.

….

Several hours later, the couple was still working on the train. As much as Sam hated to admit it, building the model really wasn't as horrible as she thought it was going to be. It was actually quite relaxing, just sitting there with Freddie as she carefully painted the body of the train.

"Hey," Freddie said as he gently set down one of the train's rivets. "Thanks for doing this with me."

"You do my chiz all the time," Sam smiled. "Besides…I've had worse Friday nights."

"I'm just really impressed," Freddie said. "I sort of thought you'd have a negative attitude about doing this with me the whole time. I'm glad you like this."

"I'm still never going to one of your train meetings ever again," Sam smirked.

"That's fine, there's actually a strict no girl policy," Freddie told her. "Mainly because most of the guys in that club have never _talked _to a girl…"

"Hey," Sam said thoughtfully. "Freddie? Why are you so into trains?"

"What do you mean?" Freddie asked.

"Well I mean you're obsessed with computers and the Pear Company, you geek out over any new tech equipment you see and I'm pretty sure you've memorized the entire screenplay for _Galaxy Wars_," Sam said. "Trains just seem a little, you know, old fashioned compared to all that."

"I guess," Freddie agreed. "But I still like them. I used to make these all the time when I was little."

"Really?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "When I was five, my dad got me my first model train set for my birthday and we stayed up all night building it. And then, after that, on the first of every month we'd get a new model and work on it for that entire month."

"You never told me that," Sam said. "That actually sounds sort of cool."

"It was," Freddie said.

"Do you still build trains with your dad?" Sam asked.

"Nah," Freddie sighed. "I only get to see him _maybe _once a year since him and my mom divorced. And when I do see him he doesn't seem too interested in building trains anymore. So I figured I'd might as well join the Training Bros so I could at least build a couple models."

"Aw," Sam frowned. "Why don't you just tell your dad that you still want to build these models together?"

"I don't want to waste his time," Freddie shrugged. "Besides, when I do see him we have a good time anyway. Last time I saw him we went fishing."

"I thought you hated fishing," Sam pointed out.

"Eh, once I got past the gross smell of the dock, it was okay," Freddie said. "Hey, while the paint on this baby dries, want to help me set up a track for us to test it out on?"

Sam nodded, leaning over to kiss him. "Yeah, let's do it."

"Awesome," Freddie grinned. "Let me just go get the tracks."

"Um, Fredwad?" Sam said as Freddie got to his feet.

"Yeah?"

"You-You never finished telling me about this train," Sam said. "What were you saying about it before? Something about its first trip?"

Freddie smiled. "Its first trip was completed in 1897 from Mississippi to Georgia. It took fourteen hours and carried over nine tons of cargo…"


	428. Chapter 428

**AN-So I know there have been a couple of oneshots involving Sam doing something to hurt her relationship with Freddie and having to fix it, but then I got a request to write a oneshot about **_**Freddie **_**messing up with Sam, so here it is.**

…**.**

_Shop_

"You know, I like Mr. Borris and everything, but he really does know how to make an entire class want to go to sleep," Carly said as her, Sam and Freddie stood by the girls' lockers after school. "I mean, I get that the Great Depression wasn't really the _funnest _time in history, but couldn't he at least show a little enthusiasm?"

"See, at this point, I've just come to _expect _to be put to sleep by any teacher I have," Sam said. "That way I'm not disappointed."

"That could also be why you have a C in three classes," Freddie pointed out.

"I know, pretty good, right?" Sam grinned at her boyfriend.

"Well, I need some caffeine to wake up from that class now," Carly yawned. "You guys want to hit that cute little coffee shop on the way home?"

"Can't, I have an AV club meeting," Freddie said. "We're gonna finally pick on our T-shirt design. We're deciding between whether or not to keep the abbreviation or if we should spell out audio visual."

"That's a real tough call," Carly frowned.

"I know!" Freddie nodded, clearly not hearing Carly's sarcasm. "Anyway, I'll see you guys tonight."

"Have fun at your geek club," Sam smiled, leaning up to give him a quick kiss.

"Aw, he's like a happy little nerd," Carly chuckled as Freddie ran off.

"Yeah, it's precious," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Anyway, let's go get caffeinated, Carlota. There's a huge _Boogie Bear_ marathon on tonight and I don't want to fall asleep through it."

"Alright, let's hit it!" Carly said happily, closing her locker door.

The girls began walking to the exit of the school.

"Oh man!" Sam said suddenly, stopping in her tracks.

"What's wrong?" Carly frowned.

"I still have Freddie's keys for his apartment," Sam said, fishing into her pocket and pulling out a silver key.

"Why'd you have his key?" Carly asked.

"Remember, I forgot my backpack at his apartment this morning and I ran back up with his key to get it while you and him waited in the lobby?" Sam said.

"Oh, right," Carly nodded.

"I'm gonna go run and give him the key so he can get into his place after his meeting," Sam said. "I'll meet you in the parking lot."  
Sam turned the corner, heading for the classroom at the end of the corridor where she knew the AV club met.

The door to the classroom was open, and before Sam even reached the doorway, she could hear the excited chatter of the club drifting out into the hallway.

_Why is my boyfriend such a doof_? Sam thought. _Although I guess he's one of the more attractive doofs._

"Oh man, can you believe the graphics on this new scene that leaked from the new _Galaxy Wars _movie?" she heard one of the AV club members say.

"Yeah, I can't wait to see it on the big screen though during the actual movie," came another voice, which she instantly recognized as Freddie's. "I can't believe it comes out this weekend!"

Sam rolled her eyes as she stepped into the classroom. Leave it to the nerdiest club in school to be talking about the nerdiest movie.

When she walked into the classroom, the group of AV students was all crowded around someone's laptop, no doubt re-watching that _Galaxy Wars _clip they had just been talking about. They were so engrossed that no one even noticed she walked in, as their backs were all facing her.

"Speaking of the movie, you're coming to see it with us opening night, right Freddie?" another AV boy said.

"Nah," Freddie sighed. "I can't. Sam's gonna get mad if I ditch her to go to the movies with you guys. I don't want to deal with _that_."

"Aw man, your girlfriend's such a downer!" the boy groaned.

Sam frowned, but said nothing. She wanted to hear this out…

"Yeah, she's kind of bossy too," another AV boy agreed. "Who tries to stand in the way of _Galaxy Wars_? That's just plain rude!"

"Yeah, well," Freddie chuckled. "Sam's not exactly the _nicest _person out there, is she?"

Sam felt as though she had been slapped as she heard her boyfriend say those words. Is that really what he thought about her? That she was some bossy, rude, _mean _girlfriend? It had to be, didn't it, if that's what he said about her when she wasn't there.

She cleared her throat loudly and the AV club spun around, finally noticing her. Freddie's eyes grew wide.

"Sam!" he said, knowing at once by the look on her face that she had heard what he had just said. "I-I-"

"You forgot your key," Sam mumbled, tossing the key over to him before turning to run out of the room.

…

"Carly!" Freddie said, bursting into the Shay's apartment. "Is Sam here?"

"No," Carly frowned, looking up from her textbook. "She completely ditched me after school! She told me to wait for her while she went to give you your key but then she never came back. She should be here soon, though, we're rehearsing for iCarly in an hour."

"Ugh!" Freddie groaned. He had really screwed up this time.

"What's wrong?" Carly asked. "Hey, I thought you didn't get out of your AV club meeting for another half-hour."

"I left early," Freddie sighed.

"How come?"

"I-I may have made a _slight _mistake in, um, my choice of words," Freddie said lamely. "Look, I just need to find Sam. Do you have any idea where she would-"

Just then the apartment door opened and Sam walked in.

"Sam!" Freddie exclaimed. "I was looking all over for you!"

"Hi, Carly," Sam said, not even looking over at her boyfriend.

Freddie tried not to cringe at the iciness of her voice.

"Sam, listen, can we talk about-"

"You said what you had to say, what else is there to talk about," Sam said simply, still not looking at Freddie. "You ready to rehearse, Carly?"

"Um…" Carly said slowly, very confused.

"Sam, I-I didn't mean what I said back there," Freddie said desperately.

"You sure sounded like you did," Sam said.

"Um, we-we can rehearse later tonight," Carly said quickly. "You two clearly need to talk…alone. I'll just be upstairs in my room doing my homework."

Carly grabbed her book and headed upstairs, leaving the couple alone.

"Sam, please, I know what you heard me say sounded really bad," Freddie said. "And-And it was…but I didn't mean it."  
"Then why'd you say it?" Sam asked softly.

"Well…I-I was just talking with the guys," Freddie shrugged. "Besides, you weren't going to let me see that movie this weekend anyway."

"When did I ever say that?" Sam snapped.

"I-I just-never mind," Freddie said. "Baby, I'm sorry. I really am. You-You know I don't think you're bossy or mean or anything. I love you."

"Yet you're so convinced I'd keep you from seeing your all time favorite movie," Sam pointed out.

"Sam-"

"I know I'm not exactly the _nicest _person out there," Sam said, looking down at her feet. "But I was trying…for you."

Freddie said nothing.

"But-But I guess I'm still not _normal _enough for you," Sam continued. "Maybe…maybe you should've gotten back together with Carly, not me. I'm sure you wouldn't have been calling _her_ mean and bossy."

Those words hit Freddie like a ton of bricks. Had he really hurt Sam that much?

"I-I don't want to be with Carly," Freddie stammered. "I want to be with _you_."

"Yeah, you really know how to show it," Sam scoffed. She turned to head out the door. Before she stepped out of the apartment, though, she turned and reached into her bag, tossing two stubs of paper at him. "Here…take one of your AV friends."

"Sam, please don't go-" Freddie started, but Sam had already slammed the door shut.

Letting out a deep breath, Freddie looked at the stubs she had tossed them, and he felt even worse.

The stubs were pre-ordered movie tickets for the midnight screening of the _Galaxy Wars _movie.

…..

"So…I take it that your talk with Sam didn't go too well?" Carly asked an hour later, coming downstairs.

Freddie was sitting on the couch, staring at the ticket stubs wearing a sad expression.

"No," Freddie sighed. "I really screwed up."

"Yeah…" Carly nodded.

"You know what happened?"

"Sam texted me," Carly said. "So you were really talking to your AV buddies about her being so mean and bossy?"

"I didn't mean it!" Freddie groaned. "I-I was-I didn't want to make a big scene during the meeting."

"So you didn't want to defend your girlfriend?"

"I did want to-I just-Ugh!"

"Freddie, I know you care about Sam," Carly said.

"Well can you tell _her _that?" Freddie mumbled.

"Um…I don't think it would be the same coming from me," Carly said.

"Did you know she had bought me these?" Freddie asked heavily, showing Carly the movie tickets.

"Yeah," Carly nodded gently. "Her and I waited outside the movie theatre for three hours last weekend. Some of those fans were a little…weird."

"She was really going to go with me to the movie?" Freddie asked. "She hates _Galaxy Wars._"  
"But she loves you," Carly said firmly. "I think what hurt her the most when she heard you saying those things is that's what she kind of feared the most about _herself._ She-She sometimes doesn't think she's as good of a girlfriend as you are a boyfriend."  
"She says that to you?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah," Carly said softly.

"But that's ridiculous," Freddie said firmly. "She's a great girlfriend."

"I know she is," Carly said. "But I'm not the one you need to be telling that to."

…..

The next morning Sam walked into the school and headed to her locker, trying not to think about what happened with Freddie yesterday. But unfortunately, that was that had been on her mind.

"Sam!"

She turned around to see Freddie himself running towards her.

"What?" Sam asked, trying not to stare into his dark brown eyes.

"Sam, I-I'm so sorry about what I said in the AV club yesterday," Freddie said. "None of it was true. I-I was stupid to say it in the first place. I was just trying to fit in with my friends, but you know what? If they're going to have the nerve to say one thing about you, they're not my friends. You mean more to me than any of those guys in the AV club."

Sam didn't reply.

"And to show you how sorry I am…come here," Freddie said, slowly taking her hand. He was thankful that she didn't snap it away.

He led her into the same classroom where the AV club meeting had been held the previous day. When they walked in, the rest of the club was already waiting.

"What are we doing?" Sam whispered.

"You'll see," Freddie smiled.

"Why'd you call this emergency meeting?" one of the AV students asked Freddie. "And why'd you bring _her_? I don't feel like getting hit this early in the morning!"

"I called this meeting because I have an announcement to make," Freddie said, clearing his throat. "Yesterday, I-I said some things about my girlfriend, Sam, that were completely untrue. Things like how she's not the nicest person and that she's super bossy."

"Yeah, _untrue_," one of the students scoffed.

"Yes, untrue," Freddie said, narrowing his eyes at the student. "There was no excuse for me saying them and I wish I could take them back. But I can't. I _can _show you all and Sam what my _real _feelings about her are, though."

"What are you-" Sam started.

"I love you more than I've ever loved anybody else in the whole world, Sam," Freddie said, cutting her off. "And-And you really _are _the best girlfriend any guy could wish for. You're the only person I can think of who would stay up for hours to listen to me vent about my crazy mom at three in the morning. You spent your special ham money on a new digital camera for me. You sat with me almost all day and encouraged me to send in my MIT application when I was afraid I wouldn't get in. You can make even the worst day I'm having better just by holding my hand and smiling. You're not bossy, you're strong-minded and determined to get what you want, and that's one of your best qualities. It's how managed to get us a table at my favorite restaurant on my birthday without any reservations. You're not mean, you're misunderstood. People don't realize how hard it is for you to trust people when all your life you've been surrounded by people who've shattered your trust."

Freddie turned to the rest of the AV club, who was staring at him in awe.

"And I know I've ignored anything you guys have had to say about Sam until now, but from now on, if you have a problem with Sam, keep it to yourself, otherwise as President of the AV club, you can find yourself a new afterschool activity."

"Wow…" one of the AV boys said softly. "If-If someone from this club can get a girlfriend who's as good as he says she is…there's still hope for all of us!"

The rest of the club began to cheer.

"Um, okay, not-not quite the reaction I was expecting, but this works," Freddie said.

"Hey, is this meeting done?" another AV boy asked. "I'm gonna go try and find a girlfriend who would bully a waiter into getting me reservations at my favorite restaurant!"

"Um, sure," Freddie frowned.

Sam and Freddie stepped back as the club ran out of the room.

"Maybe I should post a public service announcement warning the girls of the school to be on look out the next few days," Freddie said. He shook his head as he turned back to Sam. "Sam, what I just said…_that's _how I feel about you."

Sam gave him a small smile. "So you don't think I'm some horrible monster girlfriend?"

"The only monsterish thing about you is your appetite," Freddie chuckled. "Which I happen to find pretty dang impressive. So-So you _do _know I never meant any of those things I said the other day, right?"  
Sam stepped closer to him as he wrapped his arms around her. "Yeah…I know."


	429. Chapter 429

_Tape_

Sam and Freddie were both peacefully sleeping in their bed, Freddie's arm draped around Sam's waist and Sam's hand on top of his. They were both deep in their slumber, letting the wonders of sleep take over their bodies as they drifted through their dreams…

Suddenly, the couple was jerked out of their restful sleep by a loud cry that emitted from the small baby monitor on Sam's bedside table.

"Nooo," Sam moaned, slowly turning over on her side to shake Freddie's shoulder. "Freddie…your turn."

"Sam, please, can't you take this shift?" Freddie begged. "I have work in morning."

"So do I, genius, my maternity leave's up."

"Oh…right," Freddie yawned as he sat up. "Fine, fine, I'll go get him."

"Good boy," Sam mumbled sleepily as she curled back up under the covers.

Freddie dragged his feet into his and Sam's newborn son's nursery. The four-month old infant was lying in his crib bawling his eyes out.

"Hey, Jason," Freddie smiled, scooping the baby out of the crib into his arms. "You need to be changed? Alright, daddy's got you."

Freddie stifled another yawn as he set Jason down on his changing table and quickly changed his diaper. Jason continued to cry the whole time and Freddie let out a soft sigh.

"You hungry?" Freddie asked, gently rubbing small circles on his son's back. "Come on, let's get you a bottle."

Freddie headed downstairs to the kitchen and opened the fridge, only to find that there was no prepared bottles. He supposed it slipped both his and Sam's mind; they were so tired lately it was a wonder they managed to remember their own names.

He closed the fridge and looked inside the pantry for more formula mixes, but it looked like they were out of that too.

"It's okay, it's okay," Freddie cooed Jason, gently bouncing the infant up and down in his arms. "You'll get fed, buddy. You really _are _your mom's son…"

Freddie went back upstairs, Jason still crying the whole way.

"Dude…not cool," Sam mumbled as she was awoken for the second time in ten minutes as Freddie walked into the bedroom. "I said it was _your _turn."

"He's hungry," Freddie told her, sitting down on the bed.

"So feed him."

"We're out of formula," Freddie replied. "He needs to be nursed."

"So nurse him."

"Sam…" Freddie sighed.

"Alright, fine, give him to me," Sam said as she sat up. "Hi sweetie…sorry daddy's being all nubby tonight."

"I'm not being nubby," Freddie said as Sam began to nurse their son. "I'm just tired."

"Really? Because I have no clue what that feels like," Sam smirked.

"You know," Freddie said as he rubbed his eyes. "I always knew being a parent wouldn't exactly do wonders for our sleep, but I didn't know we'd be this exhausted all the time. When's he supposed to start sleeping through the night again?"

"Around six months, according to the doctor," Sam said. "Okay…I think he's full. Now _you _can put him back in his crib and-"

Jason let out another loud cry, cutting his mother off.

"Jason, what's wrong? You just ate, you're supposed to fall back asleep," Sam sighed. "That's one on mommy's best skills!"

"I already changed him, so it's not that," Freddie said. "I don't know what's bothering him. I guess he's just being cranky."

"Come on, Jason, you need to go back to sleep so mommy and daddy can go back to sleep," Sam said, patting the infant's back. "It's two in the morning."

"I don't think he cares," Freddie said. "Maybe if we put him back in his crib with his special blankie he'll feel tired."

"Good idea," Sam said as she kicked back her covers. The couple went back into the nursery and Sam carefully laid Jason down in his crib, covering him with his favorite blanket.

Still, though, the cries did not stop.

"You think maybe he's sick or something?" Sam asked, surrendering to her son after five minutes and picking him back up.

"He doesn't have a fever," Freddie said, feeling Jason's forehead. "And his nose isn't running or anything. Here, let me check his diaper again."  
Sam passed him Jason.

"Nope, he's still dry," Freddie said, defeated. "I don't know what else it could be. He just doesn't want to sleep."

"Give him twenty years, then he'll be begging," Sam mumbled darkly. "Hey! Didn't your mom bring over some old tape she used to play for you when you were a baby? She said it helped you fall asleep. We could play it for Jason!"

"Yeah, one problem, it's a _tape_," Freddie said. "We don't have a tape player. Our technology is actually from _this _century."

"We have an old one in the attic," Sam told him. "In that box of junk my mom bought us from some garage sale. Go get it!"

"I don't want to go into the attic!" Freddie frowned.

"Ugh! Why not?"

"There's spiders in there…"

"Do you want to listen to your son cry all night?" Sam snapped.

"No, but I-Fine!" Freddie conceded. "But you owe me for this!"

"We'll see," Sam smirked as she took Jason back from Freddie as he headed out of the room. She looked down at the small child in her arms. "Why don't you want to sleep, Jason? It's fun! This is the only part of your life where you're actually _supposed _to sleep all day long. Well, I guess you get to do that when you're like, ninety, but then you're all wrinkled…But you should take advantage of being a baby, you know, sweetie. You get to just-"

"Ahhh!" she suddenly heard her husband scream. A loud crash shortly followed.

"What happened?" Sam asked, rushing out into the hall, where Freddie was lying on the floor at the foot of the stairs that led to the attic, a box spilled out next to him.

"I saw a _spider_!" Freddie winced, slowly getting to his feet. "We need to call a bug guy…"

"Whimp," Sam chuckled, grabbing the tape player. "Where's that tape your mom brought over?"

"In my dresser drawer," Freddie replied. "Here, we can play it in our room."

The coupled retreated back to their bedroom and Sam set up the tape player while Freddie got out the old cassette.

"Alright Jason, this is the music grandma used to play daddy when he was a baby like you," Freddie said, inserting the tape in the player. "You'll see how relaxing and soothing it is and you'll fall asleep in no time."  
Sam hit the play button and at once soft, calming classical music began to play.

"Your mom may be insane, but this music does seem like I would put anybody to sleep," Sam yawned, feeling her own eyelids grow heavy. She looked down at Jason, who was still fussing in her arm. "Or almost anyone…"

"Give it a few more minutes, he may take some time to get drowsy," Freddie said.

But nearly twenty minutes had passed and Jason was still very much awake and boisterous.

"I don't get it, _why _isn't he falling asleep?" Sam moaned. "Do you think he has diaper rash?"

"No, he was fine when I changed him," Freddie pointed out as he paused the tape. "Try nursing him again."

"I tried while the tape was playing and he's not hungry!" Sam replied. "I can't believe we have to be up in four hours and Jason's still not sleeping."

"Hey, Jason always falls asleep when we take him on car rides!" Freddie said. "Let's just put him in the car and drive around the block a few times and maybe that will calm him down."

"I'll try anything at this point," Sam sighed.

The couple threw on some shoes and descended downstairs. Freddie grabbed his car keys and led Sam and Jason out to the driveway.

After fastening Jason into his car seat, Sam slid into the passenger seat. "This better work…I don't have the energy to try anything else."

"Me neither," Freddie said as he backed out of the driveway. "Right now I just want to be in our warm bed."

Sam rested her head against the window, still hearing her son crying in the backseat. "Who knew a four-month old could cry for so long…He must have some amazing lungs."

"No kidding," Freddie said.

As the couple circled around the block, it seemed like this idea might just work. Jason's cries were slowly beginning to fade away, and by the time Freddie had finished his third trip around the block, Jason was fast asleep.

"Yes!" Freddie whispered as he pulled back into the Benson's driveway. "He's finally asleep!"

"We can get a whole three hours of sleep now," Sam said softly. "Man, I'm gonna wind up falling asleep my first day back at work."

The second Freddie took his key out of the car's ignition, though, Jason's eyes flew open and he began to scream again.

"You've got to be kidding me," Sam groaned. "We were so close!"

"Nothing's going to work," Freddie sighed. "He just doesn't want to sleep…ever!"

The couple brought Jason back into the house, collapsing onto the couch.

"Jason, are you mad at us or something?" Sam asked as Freddie tried to gently rock him in his arms. "We're sorry for whatever we did, just please go to sleep!"

"That's not gonna work," Freddie said heavily. "I think we're just gonna have to accept that we've become prisoners to an infant."

…

Sam slowly opened her eyes several hours later, not even remembering falling asleep. She looked over at Freddie, who was fast asleep on the couch next to her. She was surprised to see Jason asleep in his arms as well.

She took a moment to take in the sight of the two people she loved more than anyone looking so peaceful before her eyes drifted to the clock above the fireplace.

"Chiz! Freddie!" Sam exclaimed, shaking Freddie's shoulder as she gently took Jason from his arms. "It's almost eleven! We're late for work!"

"Oh no!" Freddie gasped, his eyes flying open. "We overslept? We overslept!"

"We need to go get ready really quick before we take Jason over to Spencer's for him to babysit," Sam said.

"Yeah…" Freddie nodded. "So we can go to work…"

The couple exchanged looks.

"You know…we could always play hookey," Sam said slowly. "I mean what's one more day of maternity leave?"

"I do have a lot of vacation days to use up…" Freddie said thoughtfully.

"Wanna go back to sleep?" Sam asked knowingly.

"Yes _please_."


	430. Chapter 430

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 424, where Tyler came back home drunk one night. **

…**..**

_Mass_

"Well, look who's finally up," Sam said as Tyler walked into the kitchen, still wearing the clothes he had on the night before.

"My head hurts," Tyler mumbled, collapsing into one of the kitchen chairs.

"It's called a hangover," Sam said as she handed him a cup of black coffee and two Aspirins. "Here."

She watched as her son took a sip of the coffee. "Well I hope you had fun last night, because you're not going to be going out for awhile."

"Yeah, yeah, I figured," Tyler mumbled.

"Tyler," Sam sighed. "Why would you be stupid enough to drink?"

"Can I take a rain check on this lecture?" Tyler groaned. "I told you my head hurts."

"Good!" Sam said. "Maybe you'll think of that next time you decide to be an idiot."

"Come on, mom, everyone was drinking at that party," Tyler said. "Huey and Kirby probably had more to drink than I did!"

"Well that's up to their parents to deal with," Sam said.

"It's not that big of a deal," Tyler said. "And I didn't even drive home. I was _responsible _and called Emma to pick me up! Don't I at least get credit for that?"

"That was very smart of you, Tyler, and I'm glad you called your sister to come get you," Sam sighed. "But the point is you were still drinking."

"Mom, I told you, _everyone_ was drinking!" Tyler said. "What was I supposed to do?"

"Oh, I don't know, maybe you could've used your own brain and made your own decisions instead of just doing what everyone else was doing," Sam said, crossing her arms. "Look, Ty, I _know_ your dad and I raised you better than to be someone who just goes along with what people tell him to do."

"God, I just wanted to try it," Tyler mumbled. "It's not like Jason never did it! Or Emma! Or Ashton!"

"And they all got the same talk you're getting now," Sam said firmly. "Listen, I was in high school before-"

"Yeah, a million years ago…"

"You're not helping yourself here, kid," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "As I was _saying_…I was in high school before. I know that parties don't just have Seven Minutes in Heaven anymore. But you need to be _responsible_ and know where to draw the line. I get that you like to have fun. I get that you were probably pressured into drinking last night, but _you _need to know when to say _no _to something that you _know _isn't okay for you to be doing."

"Alright, alright, I won't drink anymore!" Tyler snapped. "Jeez, why do you have to be on my case all the time?"  
"Because, Tyler, you happen to be my son and I love you," Sam said. "What would've happened last night if you had a few more drinks and the little bit of sense that told you to call Emma to pick you up left you? What if you _had _wound up driving home and you got into an accident and got seriously hurt? You wouldn't be playing football anymore, that's for sure. You probably wouldn't be able to move for a month. What if you would've gotten into a _worse _accident and gotten yourself _killed_? Do you know what it would've been like for your dad and me to wake up to some police officer knocking at our door to tell us that our youngest child was _dead_?"

Tyler didn't respond.

"Okay…I don't mean to scare you," Sam sighed. "But answer me this, Tyler. Last night when you were drinking…did you have _more _fun than you usually do when you're at a party?"

Tyler slowly shook his head. "No," he admitted. "Not really. I sort of felt dizzy and sick the whole time. Plus everybody else was really drunk too so nobody was even making sense anymore."

Sam nodded. "So you didn't enjoy it?"

"Not as much as I thought I would've," Tyler said heavily. "Especially not when I have to wake up feeling like a dumbbell dropped on my head."  
Sam smiled. "Good. I hope that means _next _time you'll think about that."

Tyler nodded.

"But…I'm also not an idiot," Sam said. "I can only tell you not to do stuff for a couple more years. Soon you'll be off to college and out there doing your own thing…I want you to know that your dad and I both trust you to make those good decisions. _But _I also want you to know that if you ever do find that you've maybe gotten yourself into a situation that you _can _come to us, okay? Believe me, we'd be a lot less upset about having to pick you up somewhere than if you wound up getting hurt."

Tyler gave his mom a small smile. "Okay. Thanks, mom."

Sam patted his shoulder. "Alright, finish that coffee quickly. You have a lot of work to do."

"It's Saturday," Tyler frowned. "What do I have to do?"

"Your punishment, of course," Sam smiled. "What? You didn't think you were gonna get off that easy, did you? Let's see, I think I'll have you start by cleaning out the shed in the backyard. Careful, though, I think I saw some massive spiders. And when you finish with that the garage door needs a fresh coat of paint and then the front yard needed to be weeded. Oh, and I think your dad's train display case needs to be polished. That one will take you awhile, you know how picky he is with that."

"So I'm gonna be doing chores all day?" Tyler exclaimed.

"That's right," Sam said brightly. "So you better get started."


	431. Chapter 431

_Astronomy _

"I wonder who thought of the S'more," Gibby said thoughtfully, sticking a large marshmallow on a stick and placing it into the roaring fire him, Carly, Spencer, Sam and Freddie were sitting around. "I mean, who just thought 'Hey, let me stick this marshmallow between two graham crackers and add some chocolate'?"

"I dunno, but they're a genius," Sam said as she took a bite out of her fifth s'more, wiping her chocolate covered finger's on her boyfriend's jeans. Freddie hardly seemed to notice, though, for he was staring up at the sky.

"Maybe that means _I _can think of the next great camping snack too!" Gibby said excitedly. "How do you guys feel about J'mores?"

"What are J'mores?" Carly frowned.

"They sound French," Spencer commented.

"It's Jell-O and chocolate and graham crackers!" Gibby said. "Sounds good, right?"

"Um…maybe you should go back to the drawing board," Carly chuckled as she leaned back in her chair. "You know, this is nice. The five of us taking the weekend to go on a relaxing camping trip together."

"Yeah," Spencer said, grabbing the binoculars around his neck and peering through them. "Especially since it's prime beavcoon season!"

"Hey," Sam said, shaking Freddie's shoulder. "What are you staring up at?"

"I told you," Freddie said. "Tonight's supposed to be that big meteor shower!"

The other four groaned.

"What?" Freddie frowned.

"You've been talking about this lame meteor shower for weeks," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "It's not that big of a deal. It's just a bunch of rocks falling from the sky."

"It's one of the rarest meteor showers in the world!" Freddie pointed out.

"So that means you can probably catch the highlights of it online," Carly replied.

"But we're _here _out in the woods on a camping trip!" Freddie exclaimed. "Why wouldn't we want to watch it live?"

"Because it's at three in the morning!" Gibby scoffed. "You know if I don't get my eight hours I get those puffy bags under my eyes, and I didn't bring my special moisturizer so there's _no _way I can mess with my sleep cycle."

"Besides, we're gonna be all worn out from our beavcoon hunt!" Spencer said excitedly.

"Spence, we've already done this, there's no beavcoons," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Is too!"

"I can't believe you guys don't want to see one of the greatest phenomenons in the whole field of astronomy," Freddie said.

"Baby, to you it may be one of the greatest phenomenons, but to us, it's just you geeking out as usual," Sam told him.

"Look, maybe if it was at a normal hour we'd be more willing to see it," Carly said gently. "But three in the morning _is _kind of in the middle of the night. _And _we'd have to hike for two miles just to get to the spot to see it."

"You woke up at three last month for that huge sale at Glitter Gloss!" Freddie snapped.

"Yes, and I got some cute new jeans out of that," Carly said. "If shoes are gonna fall from the sky, I'll wake up for that no problem."

"Well _I'm _going to watch the meteor shower," Freddie said firmly. "Even if I have to myself."

…..

Sam lay in her small bed in the RV the group had taken into the woods with them. She knew it must be very late, but she still couldn't fall asleep.

Suddenly she heard something shift from the back of the RV and she saw a figure walking past her in the dark.

_I guess the nub was serious about watching that meteor shower by herself_, Sam thought, looking at her phone to see that it was supposed to start in forty-five minutes. _Well I hope the nub has fun freezing his butt off out there. _

She rolled over onto her side, trying to fall back asleep. But it was no use.

_He really has been looking forward to seeing this meteor shower for weeks, _Sam thought. _And he __**does **__always do stuff he doesn't want to do for me…and he's not exactly an outdoorsy guy…he would never survive a two mile hike on his own. If he wound up getting lost or hurt, I'd never hear the end of it from his mom._

And so with that, Sam sat up and quickly shoved her shoes on and grabbed her jacket.

"Freddie!" Sam hissed, spotting her boyfriend's retreating figure.

Freddie spun around. "Sam? Did I wake you?"

"Nah," Sam said as she caught up with him. "I couldn't sleep."

"Wait…" Freddie said slowly. "Does this mean…are you going to watch the meteor shower with me?"

"Well if I don't, you'll just wind up getting lost or running back to the RV because you spotted a spider or something," Sam said. "You just better hope this meteor shower lives up to your hype."

"It will, don't worry!" Freddie said as he took her hand. "Especially when we watch it from the spot I found. It has the perfect view."

The couple walked along the path through the woods for nearly twenty minutes before they reached a clearing.

"I'm really glad you came with me, Sam," Freddie said as he laid out a blanket on the ground.

Sam smiled, giving him a quick kiss. "I guess there are worst things a boyfriend can do than guilt his girlfriend into watching a rare meteor shower."

"It should be really impressive," Freddie said, wrapping his arms around her as she leaned against him. "You know…I actually didn't really want the others to come. I sort of wanted this to be something just the two of us did."

"I guess it is kind of nice being out here without Gibby rambling on about who knows what or Spencer trying to spot a beavcoon," Sam agreed. "So how much longer until this thing starts?"

"Should be about ten more minutes," Freddie said. "You know…if you like this, we could always go stargazing some other time or something. I have a pretty great view from my fire escape back home."

"So now you're stuck on stars and chiz?" Sam chuckled.

"I've always liked stars," Freddie said. "I've just never had someone I felt close enough to share that with. I think they're really romantic. In fact, I-I've sort of saw myself, you know, when I fell in love with a girl, proposing to her under the stars."

Sam smiled. "That sounds nice." She leaned further into Freddie's embrace. She really was glad she decided to come out with Freddie tonight. As much as she loved her tough-girl persona, she liked being able to have someone like him to be able to put her walls down with. It was one of the many reasons she loved him.

"You know," Freddie said softly, lacing his fingers with hers. "I-I know we're both only seventeen and all, but when I think about things like that…like who I'm going to marry and who I want to have a family with and who I want to grow old with…I always think of you."  
Sam felt her heart skip as she looked up into his dark eyes. "You really want to marry me?"

"I do," Freddie said earnestly. "One day. I know we're nowhere near ready now. But when the time comes…after college and we really start our lives…there's no one else who I could even imagine me marrying."

Sam blinked, feeling the tears in her eyes. "I want to marry you too," Sam whispered, squeezing his hand. "One day."

Freddie leaned down and kissed her passionately, Sam reciprocating at once.

The two stayed together for several minutes until they finally pulled apart when they heard an alarm going off on Freddie's phone.

"Oh, this is it!" Freddie said, pointing to the night sky. "It should be starting any second!"

Sure enough, a few short seconds later the sky was full of beautiful silver streaks flying through the air.

"Wow," Sam breathed, mesmerized by the scene.

The two watched the shower in silence until a few moments later when it stopped.

"They're never very long," Freddie told her.

Sam put her hand in his. "It was amazing."


	432. Chapter 432

_Printout_

"Alright class, your homework tonight will be to finish up the last fourteen chapters of _Pride and Prejudice_," Sam, Freddie and Carly's English teacher, Ms. Mims, said as she passed back the classes last test. "Be ready to discuss it and don't be surprised if there is a pop quiz thrown in there at some point during the class."

"Fourteen more chapters?" Carly whispered to Freddie. "I'm going to be up all night reading again!"

"I know," Freddie said softly. "Plus this book is so hard to understand in the first place! It takes double the time just to know what they're saying!"

"Ms. Shay," Ms. Mims said, placing Carly's test on her desk.

"Aw man," Carly moaned, seeing the red C on her paper.

"Mr. Benson," the teacher said, placing Freddie's test in front of him.

"There goes my grade point average," Freddie said sadly, staring down at his own C.

"I just hope Sam at least passed," Carly whispered, looking across the classroom at her best friend. Sam was looking down, doodling something in her notebook.

"Oh yeah," Freddie sighed. "There's no way she's going to have fourteen chapters read by tomorrow."

"Has she even _started _the book?" Carly asked.

"How would I know?"  
"She's your girlfriend!"

"She's your best friend!" Freddie hissed.

Suddenly, the bell rang and the class jumped out of their seats.

"Remember to read, everyone!" Ms. Mims said loudly. "Oh, Ms. Puckett? If I could talk to you for a few moments."

"Oh jeez," Freddie sighed. He tried to flash his girlfriend and encouraging smile as he walked out of the classroom but she didn't seem to see it.

"Well, looks like I'll be spending all night trying to finish this book," Carly said sadly. "And you heard her; we might have a pop quiz on this book too! You see, _this _is why people just read the highlights of these books online!"

"Too bad Ms. Mims purposely makes her quizzes so those won't help," Freddie said. "Man, poor Sam…Mims is probably chewing her out right now about her test grade."

"You know, I was thinking," Carly said. "This is our senior year; if Sam doesn't pass this class, she won't graduate with us! I think it would be a good idea if you and I started maybe trying to help her out."

"You're right," Freddie agreed. "How about after school today, you and I finish our own reading as quickly as possible then we'll go over to Sam's house and help her?"

"Deal," Carly nodded. "Oh! There Sam is now!"

"Hey, baby," Freddie smiled as Sam reached them, giving her a quick kiss. "Don't worry about Ms. Mims. She's insane."

"Oh…yeah," Sam nodded. "She's-she's something. Hey, why are we all just standing around here? Mama's starved, let's get to the cafeteria; it's lunchtime!"

"Yes, and we'd hate to keep you from your fish sticks," Carly chuckled. "Oh, Sam?"

"Yeah?"

"Um, I-I was thinking that maybe it would be a cool idea if we sort of practiced for our class discussion on _Pride and Prejudice _tomorrow," Carly said. "How about we all come over to my place after school today, read the fourteen chapters and discuss?"

Sam rolled her eyes. "Sounds real fun, Carls, but I'm gonna pass on that. Now come on, let's get to the fish sticks before they run out of tartar sauce!"

"Nice try," Freddie said under his breath to Carly as they followed Sam into the cafeteria.

"Thanks," Carly sighed.

…..

"Well, I officially have turned my brain to goo trying to understand what's going on in this book," Freddie announced later that evening, coming into the Shay's apartment.

"I just finished," Carly said. "And all I got from that book was that it's tough having that many sisters."

"There's no way I'm going to survive any pop quiz Ms. Mims throws at us," Freddie said.

"What are you guys so down about?" Spencer asked from the kitchen, where he was pouring himself a cup of juice.

"We just finished _Pride and Prejudice_," Carly said.

"Oh, is that the book with all the pride?" Spencer questioned.

"Yes…thanks for your input," Carly smirked. "Mr. C plus English student."

"C minus!" Spencer snapped, retreating into his bedroom with his juice.

"So," Carly said. "Any word on how far Sam is?"

"I just got off the phone with her," Freddie said. "I suggested that she come over and read with me and she laughed and told me there was some killer teddy bear movie on."

"Great," Carly moaned.

"Look, it's already past eleven," Freddie said. "Let's just meet up with Sam tomorrow before school and try and cram enough into her brain so she can at least not _fail _this quiz tomorrow."

"Deal," Carly nodded.

….

The next morning, Sam was leaning against her locker, enjoying a donut, when Carly and Freddie approached her.

"Hey," Freddie said, giving her a quick kiss.

"Hey," Sam smiled. "You missed a great movie last night. This teddy bear totally terrorized this whole town and no one even thought to lock down the stuffed animals!"

"Crazy…" Carly said. "You know what else is crazy? The overall theme of _Pride and Prejudice."_

"Huh?" Sam frowned.

"Oh yeah," Freddie nodded. "The effect of class and reputation on love…really makes you think. Just like the use of Mr. Darcy's estate as a symbol of his character."

"Speaking of Mr. Darcy, have you ever met such fellow?" Carly nodded. "Don't you think it was heroic how he rescued the youngest sister from disgracing their entire family?"

"What's wrong with you guys?" Sam asked.

"Nothing," Carly said quickly. "We just really _loved _doing all that reading Ms. Mims assigned to us. Maybe it would be a good idea to, you know, keep some of the things we just discussed in the back of your mind so when Ms. Mims gives us that quiz you can maybe, oh, I don't know, use them."

"Huh?"

"Oh look, there's the bell," Freddie said as the first bell rang through the halls. "Time for class! Come on, baby, we wouldn't want to be late for calculus."  
"I'm not in your calculus class," Sam pointed out, giving Freddie a strange look. "Seriously, what is _up _with you two?"

"Shouldn't we be asking ourselves what was up with Elizabeth Bennett?" Carly asked. "What with all her prejudice? It totally conflicted with Mr. Darcy's pride!"

"And I'm out," Sam said, shaking her head as she turned away. "Call me when you two are done being weird."

"Well," Carly sighed as Sam headed off to her first class. "That backfired."

"I guess we'll just have to pray for a miracle when she takes that quiz," Freddie said.

….

"Overall, I was very disappointed with how you did on our last _Pride and Prejudice _exam," Ms. Mims said a few days later as she once again passed out papers to the class. "I know I'm a tough teacher, but I still expected to see better grades than what I did. There was only one A in this entire class."

"Aw man," Carly moaned as she received her own exam. "Another C?"

"I've never gotten two C's in a row," Freddie sighed, looking down at his own paper.

"Many of you will really need to get your act together as we dive into _One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest_," Ms. Mims said. "I expect you to have chapters 1-5 of the book read and ready to thoroughly discuss by tomorrow's class. You are dismissed. Ms. Puckett? A word, please."

"She must have failed this exam too," Carly said sadly as her and Freddie filed out of the classroom. "This is ridiculous. I can't just let my friend not pass a class she needs to graduate!"

"You think I want to see my girlfriend to have to retake senior English our last summer before we go off to college?" Freddie hissed. "You know what, tonight I'm going to make _sure _Sam does her reading and knows these five chapters inside and out! I'll chuck her remote right out her window if I have to!"

….

"Sam, come on, just come over to my place so we can study for English," Freddie sighed as he talked to his girlfriend over the phone that evening. "_Please_."

"I'll come over to make-out," Sam said simply.

"We'll make-out after!"

"I don't want to sit around reading some book on your mom's plastic covered couch," Sam said. "I can do that here…after I watch this thing on T.V about this guy who can lick his eyeballs…"

"Sam, you need to read!" Freddie exclaimed. "Ms. Mims is one of the toughest and strictest teachers at the school and you _need _to pass her class so you can graduate!"

"Oh don't get your tick-resistant panties in a knot," Sam scoffed. "Chill out."

"I will not chill out until you promise me that you'll read all the-"

"Yeah, yeah, I've got to go, they're showing the guy grooming his eyelashes with his tongue now," Sam said, cutting him off. "Love you…Whoa! His tongue is huge!"

Freddie let out a groan of frustration as he hung up the phone. Why did his girlfriend have to be so difficult?

He shook his head as he grabbed his jacket. Well, one way or another, Sam was going to pass that class. If she wasn't going to cooperate with him, it looked like he was going to have to _make_ her cooperate.

…..

Freddie knocked on Sam's door, tapping his foot impatiently.

"I know you're home, Sam!" he called, knocking on the door again. "Open up!"

But after several minutes there was still no answer.

"You've got to be kidding me," Freddie sighed. He looked around the house and saw a light coming out of the window he knew was in Sam's bedroom.

"You're killing me here, Puckett," Freddie said, rolling his eyes as he started towards the window. He peered through and saw that Sam was indeed home. She was lying on her bed and Freddie at once saw why she hadn't answered the door; she had her headphones in. But what surprised Freddie the most, though, was that Sam wasn't just lying on her bed; she was also reading!

"What the-That's a book!" Freddie exclaimed. "And there's no pictures! She's _reading_!"

Suddenly Sam looked up from her book, clearly sensing that she was being watched.

"Uh-oh," Freddie frowned as Sam got up off her bed and opened up her window.  
"You know you _can _knock," Sam said as she leaned out her window.

"I-I did," Freddie said quickly. "You didn't answer."

"Oh, well I had music on," Sam shrugged. "So what do want, Fredwad? I thought you were too busy with your precious homework to hang out tonight."

"I-I just wanted to-I was just coming over here to make sure _you _were doing your homework," Freddie said as he took Sam's hand to climb in through her window.

"Thanks _mom_," Sam said, crossing her arms.

"Well I-Carly and I were worried that you weren't taking this class seriously," Freddie said. "And you need to pass it to graduate…But I can see that you were actually reading."

"Yeah, I _do _know how to," Sam said.

"Well good then," Freddie said. "I'm glad you decided to start doing your assignments. So do you need any help understanding the plot? The characterizations? Themes? Do you get the importance of-Hey! This isn't _One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest_!"

He picked up the book Sam had been reading and stared at the cover. "It's…_The Jungle_?"

"Hey, good to know you can read too," Sam smirked, grabbing her book back.

"Sam, why would you be reading this book when you have to get through five chapters of another book for class?" Freddie asked. "Baby, this is important!"

"I already _finished _the other book!" Sam snapped.

"Huh?"

"I finished it this weekend," Sam mumbled.

"Ms. Mims just gave us the book today," Freddie frowned. "How could you have finished it this weekend?"

"She gave me a copy early," Sam shrugged.

"Why?"

"Because," Sam said. "She wanted to know if I thought it was a good book so she could decide if she should assign it to the class to read. I thought it was pretty decent so that's why she's starting it."

"Wait, why is she-since when-huh?" Freddie stammered, confused. "Why is Ms. Mims taking book suggestions from _you_."

"What? A teacher isn't allowed to talk to me without giving me a detention?" Sam asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No," Freddie said. "It's just…well…you're not exactly the type of student that a teacher would go to for that sort of thing…that's something you would think she'd ask someone like Carly or me for."

"Except you and Carly keep getting C's in her class and I have an A in that class," Sam pointed out.

"You have an _A_?" Freddie cried. "_How_?"

"Thanks," Sam said coldly.

"I-I didn't mean _how_," Freddie said quickly. "I just meant…_how_. I mean you mislabeled at least fifteen states on our map printouts in history, you sleep through chemistry, you almost made your trig teacher cry…"

"So I can't have one subject I'm good at?" Sam frowned. "I _like _to read. It's homework you can do lying down! And I like to write. After our first essay at the beginning of the year, Ms. Mims held me back after class and told me I-I was really talented and my work was some of the best she's seen in years. She always gives me books to read that she thinks I would like. It's the first time a teacher has ever thought of me as something other than the troublemaker or slacker."

"Why didn't you ever say how well you were doing?" Freddie asked softly, still in shock. "I would've been thrilled for you."

"I guess I liked just keeping it to myself," Sam shrugged. "Besides, based on how little faith you and Carly had in me, you probably wouldn't have believed it anyway."

"I'm sorry," Freddie said. "I-I guess we did sort of assume the worst of you. And that wasn't fair of us."

"It's fine," Sam mumbled. "Just…don't make a big deal out of it to Carly. I don't want her freaking out over it."

"I won't," Freddie promised. He looked down at the book in Sam's hand. "So is that the next book we'll be reading?"

"Maybe," Sam smiled. "It's really good so far."

"Well," Freddie said, sitting down on her bed. "If you want to take a break from reading…I-I sort of do need a little help understanding those chapters we needed to have done for tomorrow. I read them, but I think I missed a lot. You mind maybe tutoring me?"

"You want _me_ to tutor _you_?" Sam asked.

"Yup," Freddie nodded seriously. "I'm struggling in that class and I think I could use someone who knows the material like you do to help me out."  
Sam rolled her eyes as she sat down next to him. "Fine. Let's get to work, Benson."


	433. Chapter 433

_Leak_

"So," Carly smiled as she sat down on the couch next to Sam and Freddie, who were happily staring into one another's eyes. "How has your first week back together been?"

"Pretty amazing," Freddie said, not looking away from Sam.

"Aw," Sam grinned.

"I'm so happy you two managed to get back together again," Carly said. "Just promise me you won't blow off any iCarly rehearsals like last time."

"Don't worry," Freddie chuckled. "We won't."

"Yeah, we know how to do this couple thing better this time," Sam told her. "Since we've had prior experience."

"You know," Carly said. "I never got a straight answer from either of you…why did you two break up last time anyway?"

"Ugh, do we really have to bring that up?" Sam asked, grabbing a handful of popcorn from the coffee table. "That was six months ago."

"Yeah," Freddie agreed. "Besides, like you said, we're back together now. Does it matter?"

"Well wouldn't you guys like to avoid making whatever mistake it was that broke you apart last time?" Carly pointed out. "Besides, we're all friends here."

"Yeah, and we're hanging out like friends do, watching a movie" Sam said. "Why do you want to ruin it by bringing up that?"

"I'm not trying to ruin our movie night," Carly frowned. "I'm just curious. You guys are my best friends…if there's something I can do to make sure that you guys don't-"

"We're fine!" Sam said loudly, causing both Carly and Freddie to give small jumps of surprise.

"Well if you're so fine I don't see what the big deal is about you telling me why you two broke up in the first place."

"The big deal is that it's really none of your business," Sam said. Her voice was calm, but she spoke with vindication.

"Um, Carly," Freddie said slowly. "Our breakup just really isn't a subject we want to discuss."

"Don't you remember that deal we made back in sophomore year?" Carly said, ignoring Freddie's comment. "About telling each other _everything_?"

"Oh come on," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "That was years ago! Besides, that was a stupid deal to make in the first place."

"How was it a stupid deal?" Carly frowned.

"Because there's no way that anybody tells anybody _everything_!" Sam said.

"Oh," Carly said, her voice rising slightly. "So you're telling me that you don't think that your _best friend _is someone you should tell everything to?"

"Um, guys?" Freddie frowned. "This atmosphere seems to be getting kind of _yelly_. Maybe we want to-"

"Oh like _you _tell me everything?" Sam snapped.

"Who wants some more popcorn?" Freddie asked, trying to diffuse the forthcoming argument. "It sure is _delicious_!"

"I do tell you everything!" Carly defended. "I happen to trust my best friend."

"Really?" Sam said, getting to her feet and crossing her arms. "You tell me _everything_?"

"Um, so you ready to watch that movie now?" Freddie said uncomfortably. "Guys?"

"Yes!" Carly said firmly, also getting to her feet then.

"Alight then," Sam said. "Since you seem to want to bring up ancient history so bad…that night of the Saddie Hawkins dance, you said that after your dates left you at the Groovy Smoothie, you and Freddie just went home, right?"

"Right," Carly shrugged. "So?"

"So you never thought to even mention the fact that you two finished off the night by having a _very _cozy slow dance together?" Sam said smugly. "That was only a few weeks after you found out that Freddie and I kissed and gave us that whole secrets speech! And that night you gave us the secrets speech I _told _you how I was still confused about my kiss with Freddie and how I didn't exactly _hate _him anymore!"

"I-I didn't know that you telling me you didn't hate him anymore was you telling me you had feelings for Freddie!" Carly exclaimed. "And-And how did you know about us dancing?"

"I saw you," Sam said coldly.

Carly blinked. "You saw us?"

"I came to meet up with your guys after I left Gibby's," Sam said. "And you were all wrapped around each other dancing."

"But-Sam, that was nothing," Carly said quickly. "We just both wanted to have one nice dance that night."

"Yeah, it didn't mean anything," Freddie said quickly.

"It meant something to me," Sam mumbled as she turned to leave the apartment, slamming the door behind her.

"Freddie, I-I'm sorry," Carly said. "I didn't mean for that to happen…"  
"Carly," Freddie sighed. "There-There's actually a reason we don't want to discuss why we broke up with anyone…especially with you. I really wish you could just respect that. I get that you want to help us, but you're not."

Carly nodded but didn't say anything.

"I'm gonna go try and find her," Freddie said.

"Tell her-tell her I'm sorry when you do," Carly sighed. "I just feel terrible now…I can't believe she saw us dancing that night. I should've told her, I-I don't know why I didn't."

"Because it's like Sam said," Freddie told her. "Sometimes you just want to keep some things to yourself."

And with that he rushed out of the apartment.

…..

Freddie instantly knew where Sam would be; out on his fire escape, leaning against the railing and looking down at the city as she always did when she was upset about something.

"Hey," Freddie said, climbing through the window. "Listen, Carly's really sorry. I don't think she meant for you guys to get into a fight or anything."

Sam shrugged. "Sometimes she just digs and digs and _digs _into something and can't let it go."

Freddie nodded as he stood next to her. "Yeah…that's one of her flaws, I guess."

The two were silent for a moment.

"Sam," Freddie finally said. "About that dance…I'm sorry we never told you. But it was just a friendly dance. It never meant anything."

"You guys _did_ start going out a few months after," Sam pointed out.

"But not because of that dance," Freddie said firmly. "It was because of that whole taco truck thing…and it never felt real."

"I know," Sam sighed.

"Did you really have feelings for me when you saw us dancing?" Freddie asked softly.

"I didn't exactly _like _you then," Sam told him. "But when we brought up the kiss again it made me think about how-how nice it was…and then I couldn't _stop _thinking about it and I didn't know if that was normal. That night we told Carly we kissed, after Spencer finally untied us from those chairs the pant prisoners put in, me and Carly were up in her room and she asked me a bunch more questions about the kiss and-and I told her that I _did _like it and that I didn't think I hated you anymore. I know that wasn't exactly me telling her I was in love with you or anything, but-but it still hurt when I saw her dancing with you like that."

"I'm so sorry," Freddie said, gently stroking her shoulder.

"Don't be sorry," Sam mumbled. "I know you two didn't mean anything with it. I'm over it. It's just…Carly doesn't get to give me her whole speech about telling me everything when she doesn't follow through herself. But I'm okay with her not telling me everything. I don't get why she needs to know everything about _our _relationship."

"Well, think about it," Freddie said slowly. "The three of us have been best friends for forever. And now you and me are a couple and we do a lot of thing just the two of us…without her. Maybe her badgering us about every detail of our relationship is just her way of trying to feel included."

Sam didn't say anything.

"She's your best friend, Sam," Freddie said. "I know she needs to learn when to step back, but never _meant _to hurt you."

"I know," Sam whispered. She gripped Freddie's hand. "I just don't want her to know that the reason we broke up last time was because of what she said…that would devastate her. And I'm just worried that one day she's going to badger me into letting that leak. That's why I left back there…I knew if she kept pushing the issue I'd tell her _she _was the reason we broke up."

"I don't want her to find out about that either," Freddie agreed. "She doesn't even know that we heard what she said that night. She just thought she was talking to Spencer and that Jenna girl." He looked into her eyes.

"Um, while we're on the subject of that…I just want to talk to you about something."

"What?" Sam frowned.

"I think we need to make an agreement," Freddie said. "Obviously, we're not the most _traditional _couple out there. People are going to think we're crazy for dating and that we're not right for each other and that we don't belong together."

"Yeah, the iCarly site is already fired up with comments from the Creddie fans saying how we're too different to be in a relationship," Sam sighed.

"There's no changing how different we are," Freddie told her. "But I just want us to promise each other that _if _for some reason we-we break up…it's going to be because it's what we honestly feel is right. Not because people keep telling us we're not supposed to be with each other."

Sam nodded. "Okay."

"I don't think we'll have that problem, though," Freddie said softly, leaning down to give her a quick kiss. "After all, we already broke up…yet here we are again."

"I guess we can't get enough of each other," Sam smirked, leaning up to give him another kiss.

…

Sam and Freddie returned to the Shay's apartment an hour later. Carly was anxiously pacing in the living room.

"Sam, I-I'm sorry," Carly said at once. "I didn't mean to keep going on and on like that. Your break up with Freddie is between you and him. If you don't feel comfortable talking about it…that's fine."

Sam nodded. "It's okay."

"Obviously you and Freddie are going to have things that go on between you that you want to _keep _between you," Carly continued. "I-I don't want you two to have to tell those things to anybody but each other. That's not fair to you."

"We appreciate that," Freddie smiled.

"Yeah," Sam agreed. "But come on, kid, you know I'll still tell you _plenty_. You _are _my best friend, after all. I need to have someone to talk about the important stuff that Fredward doesn't understand."

"Of course," Carly laughed as she stepped over to hug the blonde.


	434. Chapter 434

**AN-So in chapter 424, Sam mentioned that Emma had gotten drunk with her friends one time, but Freddie never knew about it. Well, this is that scene, but in this chapter, Freddie DOES know about it. Enjoy!**

…**.**

_Rack_

"You know, I feel like we haven't gotten a chance to have any alone time in forever," Freddie smiled as he wrapped his arms around his wife as they cuddled together on their living room couch.

"Well we should fix that," Sam grinned, kissing him. "Why don't we do this more often? Just chill out together? It's so relaxing."

"I know," Freddie nodded. "I guess we'll have to make up for lost time…"

He leaned down to kiss her passionately, running his fingers through her hair.

"Ew! Get a room, will you?"

Sam and Freddie sighed as they pulled away and turned towards their thirteen-year old son, Tyler, who was cringing behind them.

"And _that's_ why we don't do this more often," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Can we help you, Tyler?" Freddie asked.

"I'm bored," Tyler said simply.

"So you have to interrupt your dad and I?" Sam said.

"Well you guys were being gross," Tyler said, making a face.

"Don't you have homework or something?" Freddie snapped.

"I finished it," Tyler replied. He looked over at Sam. "Mom? Can you come out to the backyard with me and throw around the football?"

"Fine," Sam conceded, getting to her feet.

"Whoa, why don't you ever ask _me _to play catch with you?" Freddie frowned. "That's like, the definition of father-son bonding time!"

"Mom throws better," Tyler shrugged.

"It's true," Sam smirked, giving Freddie one last quick kiss. "Besides, you need to go pick up Emma soon. She's at her friend's house right now but she needs to be back by six because she promised to help me with dinner tonight."

"Alright," Freddie agreed. "But just know, Tyler, I _do _happen to have a pretty wicked arm on me. I _can _throw."

"Of course you can," Sam said in a patronizing voice. "Whatever you say, baby."

…..

Freddie parked his car outside Emma's friend's house, checking his watch. While he was out, he wanted to swing by the comic book shop and pick up Gibby's birthday present; a first-edition _Galaxy Wars _novel.

"Alright, Emma, let's go," Freddie said, texting his daughter that he was out front. "The store closes in twenty minutes."

Five minutes had passed, though, and Emma still had not come out to the car.

"Well, looks like it's time to pull out the embarrassing dad role," Freddie sighed, getting out the car. He knew Emma would probably be mad that he had gone up to the door to get her, but he needed to get to that comic book store.

He rang the doorbell of the house and waited for a few moments before a woman about his and Sam's age answered.

"Hi," Freddie smiled, recognizing the woman from a few of Emma's soccer games. "Um, I'm Emma's father, and-"

"Oh, Mr. Benson, this will save me a phone call," the woman said.

"You were going to call me?" Freddie frowned. "Why? Is everything okay?"

"No," the woman sighed. "I'm afraid there's been a…situation."

"Is Emma okay?" Freddie asked, worried.

"She's…well, I suppose it will depend on your definition of 'okay," the woman said slowly. "She's not hurt."

"What happened then?"

"Well while I was still at work, my daughter, Sharron, your daughter and a few more girls from the soccer team were all hanging out in my basement," the woman explained. "I came home a few minutes ago and, well…."

She took a deep breath. "They've all been drinking beer."

"Beer?" Freddie repeated. "Are you _serious_?"

"My older daughter must've bought it for them," the woman said heavily. "I'll of course be having a word with her…I'm very sorry, I didn't think they would do such a thing."

"Y-Yeah," Freddie said slowly, still trying to wrap his head around the fact that his daughter had been caught drinking. "Neither would I."

"I'm in the middle of calling all their parents to come pick them up," the woman continued, opening the door wider so Freddie could step inside. "Emma's right through here."

Freddie followed the woman into the living room, where he immediately spotted Emma sitting on the couch with five other girls, giggling.

"Emma," the woman said, causing the girls to fall silent. "Your father's here."

"Daddy…hi!" Emma said, her words slightly slurred.

"Let's go, Emma," Freddie said firmly, trying to stay calm until they at least returned to his car.

Emma slowly got to her feet, stumbling a bit as she walked towards her father.

Freddie quickly grabbed her shoulder to balance her as he turned back to the woman. "I'm really sorry about this…I-I have no idea why she would-"

"I understand, I'm just as shocked in my own children," the woman nodded.

"Her mom and I will deal with her when I get her home," Freddie assured her. He looked back down at Emma. "You're in some serious trouble, young lady."

"Why?" Emma asked, confused.

Freddie shook his head. "Come on."

…

When Freddie and Emma returned home, Emma had stopped giggling finally, but she was still unable to walk in a straight line. She nearly knocked over the coat rack as they entered the house and Freddie guided her over to the armchair where she at once fell back.

"Stay here," Freddie said sternly.

"Okay…" Emma said in a dazed voice.

Freddie quickly headed out to the backyard where Sam was still playing catch with Tyler.

"Sam?" he called out to her. "Can you come in here, please?"

"I swear, I didn't do that to your _War of Warlords _sword," Sam said at once. "It must've been…a burglar."

"Sam, I really need you," Freddie said, and Sam could tell by his face that this was something serious.

"Keep working on your throws, Ty, I'll be back in a sec," Sam said, tossing the football back to Tyler as she went inside. "What's up?"

"Emma's drunk."

"_What_?"

"Her and her little soccer friends got ahold of some beer while they were hanging out," Freddie said, his voice almost shaking.

"Is she okay?" Sam asked.

"Go see for yourself," Freddie told her, nodding over to the living room.

Sam hurried into the room where Emma was still slumped in the armchair.

"Hi mom," Emma slurred.

"Oh jeez," Sam sighed, looking over her daughter. "She's out of it."

"Well she can get back _into _it while I yell at her!" Freddie snapped. "Emma! What were you _thinking_?"

"Ow," Emma frowned, covering her ears. "That's loud."

"You're darn right it's loud!" Freddie yelled. "You're seventeen! You shouldn't be drinking beers! This is unbelievable! I don't even know where to-"

"Okay, Freddie, calm down," Sam said to her husband. "Don't yell at her right now."

"Don't yell-Sam! She's drunk!" Freddie exclaimed. "What am I _supposed _to do? High-five her?"

"Yell at her when she's sobered up," Sam said. "You're not going to get anywhere with her right now. Look…you're obviously all riled up-"

"Clearly!"

"Go-Go cool off somewhere," Sam told him. "Please. Let me get her cleaned up and then when she's coherent enough we'll talk to her."

"You can talk to her," Freddie scoffed. "I'm yelling."

….

"Jeez, Emma's so lazy," Ashton said a couple hours later as Sam set dinner on the table. "She's upstairs sleeping; it's seven o'clock!"

"She was…" Sam started, but then spotted Tyler sitting in his seat. "D-R-U-N-K."

"Emma got drunk?" Tyler gasped.

"Oh right…you can spell," Sam frowned.  
"No way!" Ashton grinned. "How much trouble is she in? Is she grounded?"

"Try not to sound so happy," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Where's dad?" Tyler asked.

"Out in the garage watching T.V.," Sam replied. "He-He's had a rough day, don't bother him."

"I'm here," Freddie mumbled, coming into the kitchen.

"You okay?" Sam asked softly.

"My baby girl is now chugging beers behind my back, so sure, I'm just peachy," Freddie replied.

Sam sighed as she sat down. She knew Freddie was going to take awhile to get over this.

…..

Later that night, Freddie laid wide-awake in his and Sam's bed. He still couldn't believe that his daughter, his little girl, had been drunk. Hadn't it been just yesterday when she had been sitting in the living room playing with Bambie dolls with Ashton? How had they gotten here?

He looked over at Sam, who was fast asleep. At least she seemed to be handling the situation better than him.

Suddenly he heard a loud gagging noise from the bathroom across the hall.

He slowly got out of bed and headed out to investigate.

Emma was sitting on the tile floor next to the toilet, vomiting her guts out.

Freddie sighed. As mad as he was at her, she was still his daughter…

"Here," Freddie mumbled, walking over to her and pulling her long, blonde hair back.

Emma looked up at her father. "Thanks…"

Freddie nodded, grabbing a washcloth from the cabinet and running under the sink. He handed it to Emma. "Wipe off your face, Em."

"I'm sorry, daddy," Emma sniffed as she took the washcloth.

Freddie sat down at the edge of the tub, but didn't say anything.

"I just wanted to try it out," Emma whispered.

"But why?" Freddie asked. "You knew you weren't supposed to."

"I didn't want to be the _only one _who was too chicken to try it," Emma said.

"Well…you certainly tried it," Freddie said heavily. "Now how was it?"

"I didn't even like the taste," Emma replied. "It was bitter and gross. And now I feel like I'm dying."

"Good," Freddie said. "Maybe that means you won't think of doing that for a _long _time."

"I won't," Emma said softly, looking down at her lap. "Daddy? Are you mad at me?"

"Very," Freddie at once.

"Oh."

Freddie sighed. "Come here, sweetie."

He wrapped his arms around her. "You made a big mistake," he told her. "I'm disappointed in you."

"I know," Emma said sadly.

Freddie kissed the top of her head. "But no matter what mistakes you make, just know…I'll always love you, okay?"

"I love you too," Emma said.

Freddie gave her a small smile. "You need to get some water in you; your body's dehydrated."

"Okay," Emma said, slowly getting to her feet. "Um, daddy?"

"Yeah?"

"How much trouble am I going to be in?"

"A lot," Freddie told her. "But I'm going to let your mom handle your punishment…she's a lot better in that field than me."


	435. Chapter 435

_Funeral _

Sam yawned as she rubbed her eyes, dragging her feet to her front door where someone had been knocking for the past several minutes.

Ready to chew out any deliveryman who thought waking up at nine on a Sunday morning was acceptable, Sam opened the door, only to find Carly standing there instead.

"Oh hey," Sam mumbled, still not fully awake. "What's up?"

"Oh Sam," Carly said, throwing her arms around the blonde. "I heard the news. I'm so sorry and I'm here for you to try and take your mind off of things."

"What?" Sam frowned.

"I heard you and Freddie broke up last night," Carly said.

"Oh yeah," Sam nodded. "Right."

"Well I have my entire get-over-a-guy kit right here," Carly said, holding up a large bag. "I have cookie dough, chocolate chips, frosting, cheesy movies and, well…I know you and Freddie are both my friends and I shouldn't be taking sides, but I have a few pictures of Freddie in here and a pair of scissors. I'll just look the other way and you can do whatever you want with those."

"Carly, that's sweet and all, but I'm fine," Sam told her. "I don't need a get-over-a-guy kit…although you can leave the junk food."

"Sam, come on, aren't you even the tiniest bit upset about the break-up?" Carly asked.

"No," Sam shrugged. "I mean it's too bad, I guess. I'll have to go back to buying my own smoothies or sneaking money from Freddie's wallet again, but other than that…"

"You guys dated for a month," Carly pointed out.

"I know."

"That's the longest relationship you've ever had."

"It just wasn't working out," Sam told her. "We were too different. After all…we wouldn't want to force anything that wasn't meant to be."

"Huh?" Carly said.

"Nothing," Sam said quickly.

"So…you're not the least bit upset?" Carly said, raising an eyebrow.

"No," Sam said simply. "Wait, how do you know we even broke up? It was less than twelve hours ago."

"I ran into Freddie," Carly said. "He came over to borrow an egg for his mother's vegetable omelet this morning."

"Oh," Sam nodded. "Um, well how was he?"

"He said he was fine, just like you," Carly replied.

"Good," Sam said, turning around. "That's-That's nice…"

"So, um, why'd you two break up?" Carly asked.

"I told you, we were just too different," Sam said firmly. "Don't worry, though. It wasn't a bad break-up or anything. It was mutual. Just…don't let that get out, okay? I can't have people know that. If anyone asks I broke up with him."

"So are you and Freddie, you know, cool?" Carly frowned.

"Yeah, as cool as we ever were," Sam said. "If you're concerned about it being awkward an all between the three of us, don't be. It's just gonna go back to the way things always were with the three of us before Freddie and started dating."

"Well maybe you should take a little time to just, you know, let yourself feel sad," Carly suggested.

"But I don't feel sad!" Sam told her.

Carly gave her a knowing look. "Sam…"

"So let's get started on this cookie dough," Sam said, grabbing the bag from her. "I haven't had breakfast yet, so this is perfect."

…..

Carly stood by her locker the next morning, piling books into her bag. She hadn't spoken to Sam since the prior morning and she hadn't seen Freddie in awhile either. She really wished she could believe what both of them had said about them being fine. But they had been so happy together! She wondered why they had even broken up in the first place.

"Hola, Carlotta!" Freddie said brightly, turning to corner and coming over to her, two lattes in his hand.

"Hey," Carly replied. "How you feeling?"

"Um, good?" Freddie said, giving her a strange look. "Why? Oh…Carly I _told_ you, I'm fine about the break up."

"You know, it's _okay _for you feel upset about it," Carly said.

"I know it is, but I'm _not_," he replied firmly.

"Okay," Carly conceded. "Why do you have two lattes, by the way?"

"It's Monday," Freddie shrugged. "I always bring Sam a latte when it's Monday so she actually stays awake during her first class. It's history, she finds it boring enough without being all sleepy and-oh. I-I only did this while we were dating, didn't I?"

Carly nodded.

"Oh, well, honest mistake," Freddie said, quickly pulling a smile onto his face. "Hey, kid, here you go. Have a latte!"

"Gee, thanks!" the random student who Freddie had thrust the extra coffee cup at said.

Carly bit her tongue. This boy was clearly _not _fine.

"What's up, people?" Sam said a moment later, joining her two friends. Carly saw out of the corner of her eye as Sam approached them that she made the slightest move towards Freddie, no doubt to give him the usual morning kiss they used to share just a few days ago.

Luckily, she stopped herself.

"Hey," Freddie said pleasantly. Almost too pleasantly, Carly noted.

"Hey," Sam said, her voice sounding just as fake as Freddie's. "You stop for coffee?"

"I did."

"Good choice…I-I hear coffee's nice in the morning," Sam said lamely.

Carly leaned back against her locker. They were going to kill her.

…..

"So are we going to do the bit with the clown funeral before or after the bit where Gibby brushes his teeth with hot sauce?" Carly asked as the trio sat in the iCarly studio a few days later, planning out their next web show.

"Before would probably be best," Freddie said, noting a few things down in his notebook.

"Do we need anymore hot sauce?" Sam asked. "I have a ton at home. My mom's dating this new guy who bought her six three-gallon containers of the stuff for their first date."

"Why hot sauce?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah, that's weird, even for the guys your mom dates," Carly agreed.

"I don't know, I try and stay out of her love life," Sam said. "So you need anymore?"

"We could use some," Carly nodded.

"And did we ever decide about doing the Random Dancing with Noodles bit?" Freddie questioned.

"I thought we were gonna do it first thing," Sam said.

"Oh, right," Freddie said. "Let me just change that in my notes…Aw man, my pen ran out. Sam, you have an extra pen?"

"Yeah," Sam said, rifling through her nearby backpack and pulling out another pen. She tossed it over to him. "There you go, baby."

Carly and Freddie both looked at her.

"Um…" Freddie said, a bit unsure of how to react to Sam using one of their old couple's terms.

"I-I mean…" Sam said quickly, he face visibly reddening. "I meant to say…there you go, you baby…Because he's a baby for crying about his stupid pen running out. What a nub, right?"

"Well, I-I think that's all we needed to do for rehearsal today," Carly said, sensing the awkward tension that had suddenly filled the room. "We can finish everything else up tomorrow."

"Okay," Freddie said, quickly putting his notebook away. He walked over to Sam and handed her the pen back. As their fingers briefly brushed against each other, Freddie suddenly felt his heart beat quicken. Just like it used to when they held hands when they were dating…

"Thanks," Sam said, avoiding his eyes as she took the pen back from him.

"I've got to go," Freddie said, grabbing his laptop. "My-My mom needs me home…It's puzzle time…"

He rushed out of the studio and the Shay's apartment, leaning against the outside wall as he tried to calm himself down.

He sighed as he looked down at the ground. Their break up may have been mutual, but it looked like it would still take some time for him to get over it.


	436. Chapter 436

_Estimate_

"You know, I know you said those shoes we saw back there wouldn't really go with anything you have," Carly said to Sam as the girls, Freddie and Gibby walked through the mall. "But those jeans at Glitter Gloss would match perfectly with them, _and _they were fifty percent off. Plus they would look totally awesome on you!"

"So should I go back and get the shoes and pants?" Sam asked.

"No!" Freddie and Gibby both moaned at once.

"What's up with you two?" Carly frowned.

"That store is back all the way at the other end of the mall!" Freddie exclaimed. "We've been walking around all day!"

"Yeah, do you know what that does for my bunion problem?" Gibby nodded.

"No one wants to hear you complain about your weird feet issues!" Sam snapped.

"Guys, I thought you said you _wanted_ to come to the mall today," Carly said. "You didn't have to come."

"We thought we were going to be here for an hour!" Freddie defended. "Or two, tops!"

"That was your mistake," Sam smirked. "The mall is an all day activity with Carly."

"Look, if you don't want to come back to the shoe store and Glitter Gloss with Sam and I, why don't you two just find a bench and sit around like the slugs you are," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Slugs?" Gibby gasped, offended. "I don't think I like Shopping Carly!"

"Fine, we'll go sit and you guys go buy shoes and pants and the whole rest of the mall!" Freddie said.

"Good choice, later!" Sam said, grabbing Carly's bags and shoving them and her own into Freddie's arms.

"Wait, no I don't want to carry around your-" Freddie started but Carly and Sam had already turned and headed off.

"We should've stayed home, right?" Gibby said.

"We're very stupid people, Gib," Freddie sighed. "Come on, let's go to the food court or something."

"Sweet, we can get churros!" Gibby cheered.

The two headed through the crowd until the reached the mall's large food court and grabbed the first empty table they saw.

"I really wish Carly wasn't our ride back home, we're gonna be here for at least six more hours," Freddie said. "Which sucks for me, I still need to think of _something _to do my semester project on."

"Hey, want to be partners for that?" Gibby asked.

"Um, Gib, don't take this the wrong way," Freddie said slowly. "But when it comes to projects, you, um, you're not-"

"Oh, I get it," Gibby smiled. "Don't worry, bro. I'd hate to work with someone who would overshadow me too."

"Yeah…right," Freddie nodded. "Anyway, I'm really behind on this project. I just got my laptop back from being repaired."

"What was wrong with it?" Gibby asked.

"Remember? That moron _Court _that Carly and Sam hired to be iCarly's intern spilled bagged lemonade all over it!" Freddie replied. "It took the Pear store two weeks to get it fixed. Plus the stupid extended warranty doesn't cover damage from liquids so I'm also out five hundred bucks too!"

"Bagged lemonade…that sure is something," Gibby chuckled. "So what are we gonna do while we're stuck at the mall? Hey, can we go get matching T-shirts with our faces on them?"  
"Absolutely not," Freddie said firmly. He looked around the food court. "Hey, I think they put in a few new arcade games over by the fountain. Wanna go play Pac Rat or something?"

"Sure," Gibby agreed.

"I think I have a few quarters," Freddie said as the two walked over to the games.

"Hey, look at this one!" Gibby said, nodding over at a large pink game system. "It's a Love Calculating Machine!"

"What? Pfft, those things don't work," Freddie scoffed. "Come on, if we're gonna waste our money, let's at least blow up a few alien space ships."

"Hang on, I want to try this out," Gibby said, fishing a quarter out of his pocket and depositing it into the machine. "It says you just enter two people's names and it will tell you how 'Love Compatible' they are. I want to test out me and Tasha."

"Gibby, you can't honestly think a mall arcade game can tell you how compatible you are with a person," Freddie said, shaking his head. "Besides, are you and Tasha even dating anymore?"

"We're not exclusive," Gibby shrugged. "Hey! It says we're seventy-five percent compatible!"

"Very nice," Freddie said boredly.

"Why don't you try, dude?" Gibby suggested.

"Because _I'm _not going to waste my money to support some machine designed to sucker people out of their quarters and give them false hopes about their love lives!" Freddie said.

"Fine, I'll try for you, since you're being a downer," Gibby said, getting out another quarter. "Let's see…we'll put in Fredward Benson and…Carly Shay!"

"Gibby, this is ridiculous," Freddie sighed. "It's stupid and-"

"Tough break man, you only got a nineteen percent with her," Gibby said.

"I think I'll live," Freddie said, crossing his arms.

"Well since you didn't have any luck with Carly…" Gibby said, depositing another quarter into the machine. "Maybe you'll have better luck with Sam."

"What? Dude, now you're just being crazy," Freddie laughed. "If I got a nineteen percent with Carly, I'll probably wind up getting a negative fifty with _Sam_."

"Whoa!" Gibby grinned. "You two got a ninety-eight!"

"A ninety-eight?" Freddie frowned, looking at the machine. "Well that just _proves _this machine is full of garbage. How could Sam and I be ninety-eight percent compatible. We _hate _each other. And we have, like, _nothing _in common. We are _not _compatible!"

"Wow, you're getting pretty defensive for a guy who thinks this machine's a joke," Gibby grinned.

"It _is _a joke!" Freddie snapped. "You can't tell how compatible two people are by just putting their names into some cheap machine! The relationship between two people is complex and based on so many different factors. Moods, emotions, ages, how long the people know each other. You know what? _I _could make a device that would be a better indicator of how someone feels about another person that this hunk of junk! You know what? I _will _do that. That's what my semester project will be! I'll make an-an _app _that can tell how a person feels. You know…I can probably make it so it can tell you _any _emotion a person is feeling…facial features are the prime indicator of emotions, after all. I can make an app that will take a person's picture, analyze it and compare it to a database I'll compile and boom! It will tell you how you're feeling!"

"You just said how a person feels is 'complex' and blah, blah, blah," Gibby pointed out.

"Obviously this won't be one hundred percent," Freddie replied. "Think of it more as an…estimate. But it sure will be a heck of a lot more accurate than this _Love Machine_. Me and Sam ninety-eight percent compatible…ha! _My _app would never make such an absurd conclusion."

"I don't know, man, I could see you two together," Gibby said.

"What?" Freddie exclaimed. "Gibby, please, your mind has clearly been diluted by this stupid thing. Come on, let's go to the exercise shop. I need some new weights. Did I tell you? I can bench almost 180 now."

"Is that a lot?"

"Yes!" Freddie snapped. "And you know what? In a few weeks, if I keep it up, I might be able to last three whole seconds against Sam in an arm wrestling match."

"Whoa…no one's lasted three seconds with her before!" Gibby said.

"I know," Freddie grinned. "So come on, the store's right there."

"Hey," Gibby said, looking over his shoulder as the boys walked away from the game. "What's that kiosk over there? Whoa! I think they make replicas of your _head _over there! Can we go check it out?"

"No, Gib," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

…

**AN-So in case you couldn't tell, this is a prequel to iOMG. Hope you liked it!**


	437. Chapter 437

_Success_

"So you excited?" Carly grinned as her and Sam leaned against their lockers one morning. "You're birthday's in four days!"

"Eh, I have one every year," Sam shrugged.

"But Sam, you're going to be _eighteen_!" Carly pointed out. "You're officially an adult."

"Yeah, that's pretty cool," Sam admitted. "And since I'll be an adult, I won't have to listen to Briggs or Howard anymore! I'm never going to do another homework assignment in my life!"

"Um, it doesn't exactly work that way, Sam," Carly frowned. "You _do _still have another month until we graduate. Until then you still kind of have to listen to adults. Remember when Freddie tried to use the eighteen card on his mom last month to try and get a later curfew?"

"Oh yeah," Sam chuckled. "She wound up locking him in his room for a week."

"Speaking of Freddie," Carly said, raising an eyebrow. "Do you know what he's doing for your birthday?"

"Nah, he hasn't said anything yet," Sam replied.

"Well whatever it is, I'm sure it's going to be super romantic," Carly told her.

"Yeah, the nub's mushy like that," Sam sighed, though a small blush crept onto her face.

"Morning," Freddie yawned, coming around the corner.

"Whoa, you look exhausted," Carly said as Sam gave him a quick kiss.

"Were you up all night again?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "I fell asleep around six and then I had to wake up an hour later to come here."

"Why are not sleeping?" Carly questioned.

"He's doing his application for that Young Brilliant Minds scholarship," Sam explained.

"Yeah, it's this huge scholarship that they only reward five people with in the whole country," Freddie said. "If you get it, your entire college tuition is paid for, _plus _you get to go on a free trip to D.C. to meet the president. The thing is, since it's such a prestigious scholarship, the application is intense. I have to write four essays, fill out ten pages of questions, complete a perfect resume, get letters of recommendation _and _prep for a phone interview…it's really stressful. Plus it's due next week so I'm running out of time."

"Eh, you'll be fine," Sam assured him. "You're the biggest nerd I know."

"Thanks," Freddie smiled. "I just hope the scholarship people think so."

"Are you almost done with the application?" Carly asked.

"I still have two essays to write," Freddie sighed. "Plus I have to fluff up my resume a little more. A couple more all nighters should do it."

"Come on, baby, you need to at least sleep a little," Sam reasoned. "Especially since you're doing something so boring. The only reason _I _ever stay up all night is to watch _World's Worst Cooking Fiascos_. One time they had this chef who accidently served up part of his thumb in the chicken parmesan!"

"Aw Sam!" Carly moaned. "I was going to have that for dinner tonight! Now all I'll be able to think about is finding Spencer's thumb in it!"

"I'll take it off your hands," Sam offered.

"Well I'm gonna go grab a soda before I head to class," Freddie yawned. "Maybe the caffeine will wake me up. I'll see you girls at lunch."

"Bye," Sam said as Freddie went off to the vending machines.

"I hope he gets that scholarship," Carly said. "I've never seen him work so hard on something."

"I know," Sam agreed. "But he's smart, he's got this in the bag."

"True," Carly nodded. "Anyway, back to your birthday…How about we have some people over to my place? We can get food, cake…ham. It will be a party, so I'll be happy, and it will also be low key, so you'll be happy."

"Okay," Sam nodded. "As long as you break out the good honey glazed ham."

"Only the best," Carly laughed.

….

"So the party should be over by midnight," Carly told Spencer as she slid a giant ham out of the oven on the day of Sam's birthday. "So don't come home until after then."

"Why can't I stay for Sam's party?" Spencer frowned. "I'm a hoot!"

"This is a party of teens," Carly said.

"So?"

"Ugh, we _seriously _need to find you some friends your own age," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"So where is Sam?" Spencer asked, ignoring his sister's comment.

"Probably with Freddie," Carly told him. "I can't wait to hear what he did for her birthday. I told him to be over here by eight, though, so if his plan went over, he'll hopefully just finish it up tomorrow with her."

"What did he do for her?"

"I don't know," Carly shrugged. "But you know Freddie. He probably bought her a bouquet of her favorite flowers, took her on a romantic picnic at their special spot in the park and got her some piece of fancy jewelry."

"Aw," Spencer said.

"I know, they really are cute," Carly said. "Nauseating at times, but cute."

"Hey, hey!" Sam said happily, letting herself into the apartment.

"Happy birthday!" Carly exclaimed, running over to her best friend and wrapping her arms around her. "I can't believe you're officially an adult!"

"Yeah, you'll see how awful it is," Spencer said, giving Sam a hug as well. "Happy birthday, kid. Your present is drying upstairs, so don't go upstairs!"

"Thanks," Sam grinned.

"Everyone will be here in an hour," Carly said. "And since I know you won't be able to wait until then to start eating, I made you a pre-party ham."

"What? Carls, you're the best!"

"I know," Carly laughed. "I have your present in the kitchen too."

"Awesome, that's my favorite part of my birthday," Sam said excitedly. "Hopefully it beats what my mom got me. She bought me a gallon of hot mustard."

"Oh…" Carly frowned.

"It's better than any other birthday present she's gotten me," Sam shrugged. "Besides, I made a mean sandwich with it today."

"Well, I promise my present is better than hot mustard," Carly assured her. "But I don't know if it will beat whatever Freddie got you…Spill, what did he do with you today? Was it romantic? Did he make you feel like a princess?"

"Um, I, um, actually haven't seen him yet today," Sam said slowly.

"What?" Carly exclaimed. "But it's your birthday!"

"Yeah, well, he's busy with that scholarship thing," Sam said quickly. "But he's coming here tonight, right?"

"I told him we're having a party at eight and he said he'd be here," Carly nodded.

"Great, so I'll see him then," Sam said. "So let me see that ham, Shay."

…..

"Sam?" Carly said later that evening as the party began to dwindle down.

"Yeah?" Sam asked, looking up from her piece of cake. "Oh, hey Carls. Great party! You invited my detention crew!"  
"Yeah, well, I know you like them," Carly said. "But, um, are you okay?"

"It's my eighteenth birthday and my best friend just threw me the best party ever," Sam said. "Of course I'm okay!"

Carly bit the corner of her lip. "Maybe-Maybe I should try knocking on Freddie's door again."

"No, don't do that," Sam said. "He was busy."

"He's your boyfriend and he hasn't acknowledged one of the biggest birthdays of your life!" Carly exclaimed. "He hasn't called you or even _texted _you _and _he didn't come to your party! And now it's almost midnight. You're day's practically up!"

"It's just a birthday," Sam mumbled. "I'll have one again next year."

"But Freddie should've been here with you," Carly said. "I don't care how many applications he had to do. You're his girlfriend."

"Carls, it's fine," Sam said. "But, um, I-I think I'm gonna head home now. I ate too much cake…Thanks for the party though. It was the best."

"You sure you don't want to sleep over here?"

"Nah," Sam sighed. "I should go home. I think I forgot to feed Frothy."

"Oh, well, okay," Carly nodded.

"Hey, thanks again," Sam smiled. "And when Spence comes back, tell him I said thanks for the Boogie Bear sculpture. When my cousin Lou makes parole next weekend I'll bring him over to help me get it home."

"Okay," Carly said, giving Sam one last hug. "Call me if you need to talk."

Carly watched as Sam headed out of the apartment. She couldn't believe Freddie! What kind of boyfriend didn't even send his girlfriend a text message on her birthday?

Silently fuming, Carly began to clean up the mess from the party. A few moments later, though, the front door opened and Freddie walked in looking tired, yet happy.

"Well, it's done!" Freddie said. "It took every ounce of energy I had, but I finished my scholarship application! All four essays and million questions are _done._"

"Well isn't that _swell_?" Carly snapped, narrowing her eyes.

"Oh, sorry I couldn't make your party," Freddie said. "I just needed to get that application in. But how was it? Did you make it hobo themed again?"

"It wasn't a hobo party," Carly told him coldly.

"Oh…" Freddie frowned, a little taken back by Carly's tone. "Well did you have fun?"

"Yes, I had lots of fun!" Carly exclaimed. "And I'm sure Sam would've too!"

"Where is Sam?" Freddie asked. "Is she still here?"

"No! She left! I can't believe you, Freddie Benson!"

"Okay, _what _is your deal?" Freddie frowned.

Carly crossed her arms. "Really? What is _my _deal?"

"Yes!"

"Freddie," Carly asked in a harsh voice. "What day is today?"

"Um…Friday?" Freddie replied lamely.

"Just Friday?"

"Carly, will you just tell me what's got you so mad at me?" Freddie moaned.

"What's the date?" Carly demanded.

"What?"

"The date," Carly repeated. "What's today's date?"

"Well for the next eight minutes until midnight it's April 17th," Freddie answered. "Now what does that have to do with-No! No, no, no, _no_!"

"Oh, did you remember?" Carly snapped.

"Today's Sam's birthday!"

"Yeah, it is!" Carly yelled, thumping the back of his head. "And you couldn't even step away from your precious application to wish her a happy birthday! How could you forget your girlfriend's birthday?"

"I didn't forget! I-I knew it was coming up!" Freddie defended. "I had it all planned out! I was going to take her out for a romantic dinner, we were going to go to the fair and I was going to win her the biggest teddy bear there and when she wasn't looking, I was going to slip a beautiful and _very _expensive necklace around it! It was perfect! I-I can't believe I lost track of time! I'm such an idiot!"  
"Yeah, no kidding," Carly scoffed.

"Okay, I have…seven minutes until midnight when Sam's birthday is officially over," Freddie said, panicked. "I-I can't take her out for dinner…all the restaurants are closed. So is the fair…I can give her the necklace I got her still! I just need to sprint to her house!"

"Sam lives almost ten minutes away," Carly pointed out.

"I'll make it!" Freddie cried as he turned and raced out of the door.

….

Sam sat on her bed, leaning against the pillows. She looked at her phone. It was 11:59, and she still hadn't heard a word from Freddie.

She tossed her Pearphone aside. She knew she told Carly she didn't care that Freddie had apparently forgot her birthday since he was busy with that scholarship application, but she was in fact very hurt. Was some scholarship really more important to Freddie than her?

But then again, she didn't want to look like someone who threw a fit because someone didn't fuss over her birthday.

Suddenly, she heard pounding on her front door.

She quickly got up out of bed and looked through the peephole of the door, spotting Freddie on her front step, dripping sweat and out of breath.

"Dude, are you okay?" Sam asked, opening the door.

"No-I'm so-I didn't mean-it's your-" Freddie gasped.

"Sit down before you pass out," Sam said, helping Freddie over to a chair. She grabbed a bottle of water and tossed it to him.

"Sam," Freddie finally managed after gulping down half the water. "I am _so _sorry I forgot about your birthday today."

Sam shrugged as she sat down in the chair next to him. "You've been busy," she mumbled.

"That doesn't matter," Freddie said at once. "I-I can't believe I let myself get so involved in that stupid scholarship application that I actually forgot one of the most important birthdays of your life."

"Yeah, well…" Sam mumbled. "That scholarship was important."

"But I still shouldn't have let that get in the way of us celebrating your birthday together," Freddie told her. "That was unforgivable of me. I'm so sorry."

Sam didn't reply.

"Um, can you yell at me or something now?" Freddie asked, confused at Sam's lack of response. This was the girl who threw his cell phone in the toilet for changing the channel on her, after all.

"Look, you obviously cared a lot about that scholarship," Sam said. "We can just celebrate my birthday tomorrow."

"But-"

"Hopefully you'll at least get that scholarship," Sam said.

"Sam," Freddie sighed. "I-I screwed up. Like _really _screwed up. Why aren't you more mad at me?"

Sam looked down at her lap. "Because," she said. "I-I guess I just need to get used to this if we're gonna stay together. I mean, you've always been super successful. And now that we're about to graduate you've really about to hit your peak. You already got accepted into MIT, you have that summer internship at the Pear Company and now you'll probably get this scholarship. I just have to deal with the fact that my boyfriend's gonna be busy being some big shot."

"What? Sam, no, that's crazy," Freddie said. "I don't care how successful I am in my life, I never want you to think that I would put any of that stuff above you. Listen, today was a mistake. It was completely my fault and I was a _moron_. But I never, not even for a second, thought that scholarship was more important than you. Nothing is. If someone came up to me and gave me the choice between going to MIT and having you in my life, I'd pick you in a second. I never want you to feel like you're on the back burner in my life. I love you."

Sam gave him a small smile. "You'd actually give up MIT for me?"

"Absolutely. And that scholarship. And my internship. Anything."  
"Well thanks," Sam chuckled. "But you know you don't have to."

"But just know…I would," Freddie said, stepping closer to her to and leaning down to kiss her. When the couple broke apart, Freddie rested his hands on her waist. "Hey, I hope you're ready to have the best day-after-your-birthday celebration ever tomorrow."

"Can't wait," Sam smirked.

"But I want to give you part of your birthday present now," Freddie continued. "There's a catch though…"

"Catch?" Sam repeated.

"You only get it," Freddie told her. "If you yell at me like I deserve. I'm your _boyfriend_ and I didn't even call to wish you a happy birthday! What kind of guy does that?"

"You want me to yell at you?" Sam said, raising an eyebrow.

"I deserve it," Freddie said simply.

Sam rolled her eyes, holding back a grin. "Fine…but you asked for it." She cleared her throat. "Benson! I cannot _believe _you forgot my birthday! My _birthday_! It's one day out of the stupid year and you couldn't even put down your dang application to get me a piece of cake? What kind of jerk are you, huh? I should hit you so hard you wake up on my _next _birthday! You're such a _nub_!"

"Wow," Freddie said, blinking as he massaged his ears. "That was…something."  
"Felt good," Sam smirked. "Now…I was promised a present?"

"Right," Freddie chuckled. "Close your eyes."

Sam complied and Freddie reached into his pocket and pulled out a golden chain and gently placed it around her neck.

"You can open them," Freddie said, and Sam's eyes flew open.

"What is-Oh…" Sam whispered, looking down at the necklace. On the chain was a simple heart charm. "It's beautiful."

"Turn it around," Freddie smiled.

Sam turned the charm around to see a tiny engraving.

"Sam, you will always have my heart. Love, your Nub," she read. She looked up at Freddie. "Thank you."

"I hate that I'm giving it to you a day late," Freddie said.

"I don't care," Sam said at once, lacing her arms around his neck and kissing him senseless.


	438. Chapter 438

_Timetable_

"Alright, I dropped Emma off at soccer, Ashton off at cheerleading, and nearly had a heart attack while I let Jason take the car around the block a few times," Freddie said, collapsing into the kitchen table next to Sam and seven-year old Tyler. "My parenting is done for today."

"Could you not complain in here?" Sam asked, looking up from the workbook she had been writing something in with Tyler. "Some of us have been working on third grade math for three hours."

"I don't want to do anymore math, mom!" Tyler moaned.

"Well neither do I, but your teacher's insane and assigned you ten pages of multiplication facts, so you're just gonna have to deal with it," Sam said. "Okay, try this one. Five times two?"

"I dunno."

"Yes, you do," Sam said, trying hard to keep her patience. "We just went over your fives timetable. You had it memorized!"

"I forgot it," Tyler told her.

"How? It was two minutes ago!" Sam exclaimed.

"Okay," Freddie said, sensing Sam's frustration. "How about you and I do a trade, Sam?"

"What sort of trade?" Sam asked.

"I'll take over the homework if you pick up Emma and Ashton," Freddie said. "_And _you have to give Jason his driving lesson for the next two weeks."

"One week," Sam said.

"Done," Freddie said.

"Why don't you like doing my homework with me, mommy?" Tyler asked.

"Aw, sweetie, it's not you," Sam smiled, kissing the top of his head. "But mommy never even did her own homework. Daddy's the nerd in the family, he'll be more help than me."

"Thanks," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"I guess I should run to the store and grab _something _for dinner tonight," Sam sighed, getting to her feet. "Oh, and I need to pick up index cards for Jason's project too."

"And don't forget that it's our turn to bring snacks for Emma's soccer team next week," Freddie added.

"Oh yeah," Sam nodded. "I guess I have to grab those too…Hey, wanna switch back? I'll do the homework if you do these stupid errands?"

"Nice try," Freddie grinned.

…

"We woke up at six to get the kids ready for school," Sam yawned as she fell into bed later that night. "And we're going to bed now at…two. You realize we've been going for _twenty _hours today?"

"How is that different than any other day?" Freddie pointed out.

"Kids really take it out of you," Sam sighed. "We need a break."

"Yeah, okay," Freddie scoffed.

"I can dream," Sam smirked.

"Well at least our anniversary is in five days," Freddie said. "_That's _the day we can get a break."

"Oh yeah," Sam nodded. "Dinner, movie…plus I was gonna surprise you, but I can't wait. Last week I went to the camping supply store and bought an inflatable mattress. After the movie, you and I are going to go to that romantic beach, lay on this amazingly comfy mattress under the stars and take the best nap you and I have ever taken."

"We get to _nap_?" Freddie grinned. "Baby, you have just gotten me the best anniversary present ever."

"Don't you forget it," Sam chuckled. She leaned over and gave her husband a quick kiss. "Night Frednub, see you in four hours."

…..

"Okay, guys, in case you forgot…" Jason said the morning of Sam and Freddie's anniversary. "Today is mom and dad's anniversary."

"I thought they had one of those last year," Tyler said.

"They have one every year, Tyler," Ashton explained. "On the day that they got married. It's super romantic."

"More like super cheesy," Emma cringed.

"Alright, alright, can you three can it?" Jason said. "Let's just compare all our gifts for them to make sure we didn't get them the same thing."

The three stared back blankly at their older brother.

"Oh come on!" Jason exclaimed. "You guys didn't even get mom and dad anything? Wow, I am _disgusted_. These are out _parents_. They give us everything and you three can't even pull it together on their one day?"

"It slipped my mind!" Ashton defended. "This is the first year Emma and I aren't young enough to get by with a homemade gift!"

"I still can, right?" Tyler asked.

"Pitiful," Jason said, shaking his head.

"Oh what did _you _get them, Mr. Perfect?" Emma snapped.

"_I _got them a fancy box of chocolates," Jason said proudly, walking over to his desk and holding up a large box. "There's coconut ones for dad and caramel ones for mom. At least they have _one _child who's capable of thinking of people other than himself. You guys really should learn from me."

Emma stood up and grabbed to box from Jason and opened it, revealing a pile of wrappers.

"It's empty!" Emma pointed out.

"I-Oh…" Jason said lamely. "Oh right…I-I got hungry one night."

"Now what was it you were saying?" Ashton smirked.

"Okay, now's not the time to point fingers," Jason said quickly. "We all need to work together to figure out what we're going to get mom and dad. They said they were leaving for their date at six and would be home by midnight. We have until they get home tonight to plan something big."

"I can make them a card," Tyler offered.

"That's a start…you still have the cuteness factor working for you," Jason said thoughtfully. "What else?"

"Hey, I know!" Ashton said. "I've got the _perfect _idea."

"What?" Emma asked.

"Remember when me, you and Clarissa were looking at clips from mom and dad's old web show?" Ashton said. "iCarly?"

"Yeah," Emma nodded. "So?"

"Well we saw all these clips that mom and dad were really special to them," Ashton explained. "Like that part when mom told the entire Internet she had never kissed anybody to get everyone to stop making fun of dad and they wound up having their first kiss because of that?"

"Oh yeah!" Emma said. "And we saw the night mom and dad got together at that mental hospital!"

"And when dad proposed to mom during their reunion webcast!" Ashton added. "What if the four of us make mom and dad a video of us reenacting those moments for them? It's easy, cheap, and _adorable_. Plus we'll have the thoughtfulness thing going."

"You know…" Jason said slowly. "That actually might work."

"Emma, Tyler and I can do the acting," Ashton continued excitedly. "And Jason, you can do the editing stuff on your computer!"

"Alright, let's do it!" Jason said.

…..

"And we're off!" Sam beamed as her and Freddie closed their front door behind them. They had just said goodbye to their kids and left Jason in charge so they could set out on their sixteenth anniversary dinner.

"Finally," Freddie agreed, leaning down to kiss his wife passionately. "Tonight is just about you and me. We don't have any kids with us."

"Yeah, what was with them all day?" Sam asked. "They were down in the basement all afternoon."

"Who knows, but no one broke any bones and I didn't hear any crashes, so in my book, that's fine," Freddie said, taking Sam's hand as he walked her to his car. He opened the passenger side door for her. "In you go, Mrs. Benson."

"Oh, aren't we a gentleman?" Sam laughed.

"Anything for my beautiful wife," Freddie replied. He closed her door and hurried over to the driver side, hopping into the vehicle. "Alright, first stop is Pini's for some delicious lasagna."

"Can't wait," Sam said, rubbing her stomach. "I've been thinking about that lasagna for weeks."

"Then let's get going," Freddie said, putting his key in the ignition. As he twisted it, though, the car engine gave a loud sputter.

"Um…what was that?" Sam frowned.

"No, no, no!" Freddie moaned, turning the key again but getting the same result. "The engine won't start!"

"Why not?"

"I don't know," Freddie sighed. "Because the universe hates us?"

"Let's just take my car," Sam said.

"We can't," Freddie told her.

"What do you mean?"

"Sam, I'm parked right behind your car right now," Freddie pointed out. "You can't get out of the driveway. Maybe we can call a tow truck to bring my car to the shop so that way we _can _use your car."

"Well do it!"

"I'm doing it, hang on!" Freddie said, pulling his cellphone out of his pocket. He quickly dialed the nearby towing service and began tapping his fingers impatiently on the steering wheel.

"Hello, you have reached Leslie's Towing Service," a voice finally said on the other line.

"Yes! Hi, I have a towing emergency," Freddie said. "My car won't start and my wife and I-"

"-Currently, we are completely scheduled for the rest of the night," the automated voice continued. "We are unable to offer any towing services for the rest of the evening. Please call back tomorrow for service. Thank you."

"Aw man!" Freddie groaned.

"So what are we going to do?" Sam asked.

"I don't know," Freddie sighed. "Carly's out of town so we can't borrow her car, Gibby's working tonight, Spencer's car has a flat tire from his little experiment…I-I hate to say it, but I think we're trapped in here."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Sam nodded sadly.

"I'm sorry, baby," Freddie said.

"It's not your fault," Sam told him. "I was just looking forward to getting to spend our anniversary together. You know, _alone_."

"I know," Freddie said. "I was too. But we can go out tomorrow night."  
"No we can't," Sam told him. "I'm driving Ashton to Olympia for that cheer competition and you have to take Tyler to his baseball practice."

"Oh…yeah," Freddie said heavily.

Sam gave him a small smile and gently kissed his cheek. "We'll get to it though, okay?"

Freddie nodded. "Okay."

The couple slowly headed into the house once again.

"Well, what do we do for the rest of the night?" Sam asked.

"I think there's some left over Chinese food in the fridge, if Emma hasn't gotten to it yet," Freddie said.

"Mom? Dad? What are you doing home?" Ashton asked, coming downstairs. "I thought you left for your date."

"Car trouble," Freddie explained. "We're stuck staying home for the night."

"Wait, this is perfect!" Ashton exclaimed.

"Not my initial reaction…" Sam stated.

"We can give you your anniversary present now!" Ashton said excitedly. "We just finished it!"

"You guys got us a present?" Freddie said. "You didn't have to do-"

"Jason! Emma! Tyler!" Ashton called upstairs. "Mom and dad are back! Bring down the stuff!"

"What stuff?" Sam asked, confused.

"Happy anniversary!" Tyler said, running over to his parents and giving them a homemade card. "I made this for you!"

"Aw, you did?" Sam grinned, taking the card and showing it to Freddie. "Wow, we love it."

"Happy anniversary, mom and dad," Jason said, coming down with the twins, his laptop in hand.

"Yeah, happy anniversary!" the twins echoed.

"We're sorry your car wouldn't start," Ashton said. "But hopefully our present will make you feel better. We worked on it all day."

"Oh, so that's what you guys were doing?" Sam smirked.

"It's a video," Jason explained, setting his laptop down on the coffee table. "We made it for you."

"Wow…you used that new editing software I showed you, didn't you?" Freddie observed proudly.

"Uh-huh," Jason nodded.

"The video is about you guys when you were younger," Emma told her parents. "We watched a bunch of old iCarly clips and found the ones that you guys had always told us were special to you and we reenacted them for you."  
"Seriously?" Sam smiled. "You guys, that was so great of you!"

"We know," Tyler said, earning him a thump on the head from Ashton.

"And since you guys didn't get to go out," Jason told them. "We'll let you guys have the downstairs to yourself for tonight. We'll stay up in our rooms."

"Wow, Sam, who knew our kids were such good gift givers?" Freddie chuckled.

"Just don't be too gross and mushy," Emma told them. "We _are _upstairs."

"Don't worry, kid," Sam laughed.

"Thanks, you guys," Freddie said. "Your mom and I are real lucky to have four kids like you."

….

"Let's watch it again," Sam said later that evening as her and Freddie sat together on the sofa.

"That will be the third time," Freddie pointed out.

"I don't care," Sam said, nuzzling in closer to Freddie. "This is the best gift they've ever given us."

"It is," Freddie agreed, planting a soft kiss on her lips before pushing the play button on the laptop.

Emma and Tyler popped up on screen, playing Sam and Freddie when they were fourteen and Sam revealed to the Internet that she had never kissed anyone, just like Freddie.

"Emma and Ashton really look just like you," Freddie commented.

"Tyler looks exactly like you, too," Sam nodded. "Jason looks the most like both of us, don't you think?"

"Yeah," Freddie chuckled as the couple continued to watch the video. The scene changed to when Sam admitted to liking Freddie at Troubled Waters.

"How many years ago was all this?" Sam whispered.

"Probably close to twenty," Freddie said. "Really makes you feel old, huh?"

"We've been stuck with each other for awhile, haven't we?" Sam grinned.

"Like you haven't enjoyed it," Freddie smirked.

"Yeah, it's been alright," Sam replied, craning her neck up to kiss him. "I love you."

"Love you too," Freddie said softly. "Hey, here's when you tied me to the wedgie bounce thing when we were fifteen."

"Oh yeah, one of personal favorites," Sam said. "I still can't believe this…we have the _best _kids."

"We really do," Freddie nodded. "They're a handful and they can be insane at times…"

"But they're ours," Sam smiled.


	439. Chapter 439

**AN-This is a sequel to ch432, where Freddie found out that Sam was really good at English.**

…**..**

_Jungle_

"Wow, you really know your stuff, Sam," Freddie said as him and Sam sat on his couch flipping through the latest book they had been assigned in English class, _The Jungle_. "I actually _get _what's going on in this book!"

"Yeah, it's really depressing," Sam nodded. "We could watch a movie or something now if you want to cheer up."

"Hang on, I just want to review this last chapter," Freddie told her. "You know, with your help, Sam, I think I'll be able to bring my grade up to a B+! I mean it will ruin my straight A plan, but it was better than what I would've gotten without you."

"Don't you forget it," Sam grinned.

"Hey, baby?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah?"

"I've been wondering," Freddie said, closing his book. "How long have you been into this kind of stuff. Reading and writing, I mean."

"Oh, I dunno," Sam shrugged. "I guess I started liking real books and not just _Boogie Bear _when we made that bet back in eighth grade that I couldn't finish _The Penny Catcher. _You remember that?"

"Yeah, I do," Freddie chuckled. "That was years ago, though."

"Uh-huh, congrats on finding me a legal hobby," Sam smirked. "And I've always sort of liked writing. When I was little I used to write little stories about this pig named Dave. And then my mom started dating a Dave and I had to stop because her Dave was even more disgusting than I made the pig."

"Based on the guys your mom dates, I'd believe it," Freddie laughed. He put his arm around her. "So you think you'll major in English or Literature or something in college next year?"

Sam shrugged. "I dunno."

"You don't know?" Freddie frowned. "But Sam, you're so good at this stuff!"

"Yeah, I like reading because it's fun," Sam said. "I don't know if I want some stuffy old professor ruining the fun of reading by giving me a billion papers and exams about it."

"Well I think you should seriously consider it," Freddie said. "You have a real gift. Oh! That reminds me!"

He grabbed his backpack and began rifling through it.

"What are you looking for?" Sam frowned.

"This!" Freddie replied, pulling out a sheet of paper. "It's a scholarship competition. See, all you need to do is write a ten-page essay about a fictional character in a classic literature work and you can earn a chance to attend some giant poetry seminar this summer. You'd probably get to meet lots of famous authors and make some connections!"

"I don't want to write a ten-page paper," Sam said.

"Why not? You like to write!" Freddie pointed out.

"Yeah, about things _I _want to write about," Sam told him. "I write for _me_. I don't want to force something out just to win a contest."

"But Sam, you're so good at it!" Freddie said. "It would be stupid for you to just waste your skills and never show them to the world."

Sam crossed her arms. "Why?"

"Well…because," Freddie said simply. "What's the point of being good at something if you're not going to do something with it?"  
Sam narrowed her eyes. "You know, this is why I didn't want to tell you about this. I like reading because it's fun for _me._ I like to write because it makes _me _feel good. I don't want to have a million other people looking down at my work picking it apart and telling me it's not good enough!"

"Sam, I'm just saying, it would be nice for you to be able to be proud of what you can do," Freddie said.

Sam shook her head, getting to her feet. "I am proud of how well I do in English…I guess you aren't, though."

And with that she quickly turned and headed out of the apartment.

"Wait…Sam!" Freddie called after her.

But she had already left.

Freddie sighed. Why had she been all worked up? All he had done was try to be supportive of her! Wasn't that what boyfriends were supposed to do? Why wouldn't she want to actually _do _something with her knack for English? She could be the next big author! Or she could become a prestigious literature professor at a high-end university!

He shook his head. "She finally found something she's really good at," he said to himself. "Why would she just throw that away?"

Sighing again, Freddie headed out of the apartment and into the Shay's apartment. Carly and Spencer were out of town visiting a friend of their dad's, but he knew Sam would be there.

Sure enough, when he went up to the iCarly studio, he found Sam sitting on one of the beanbag chairs.

Taking a deep breath, Freddie stepped into the studio and sat down next to her.

"Well, um, I'm sorry for whatever I did," Freddie said.

Sam rolled her eyes. "Ha."

"Sam, I'm sorry, but I don't get why you're mad," Freddie said. "All I want for you to do is actually make something out of this talent you have. I mean I _wish _I was as good at English as you are."

"I just don't want to dedicate my whole life to it, okay?" Sam snapped. "Jeez, why can't you accept that?"

"But you love it!" Freddie exclaimed. "You're supposed to find that one thing that you're passionate about and go with it! Why wouldn't you want to spend your life doing something that you're good at and that you enjoy so much?"

"Because what happens when I fail, huh?" Sam yelled.

Freddie frowned. "What do you mean? You're not going to fail. You have the highest grade in our English class right now!"

"But what about when I get to college next year?" Sam pointed out. "And my professor tells me my writing style is all wrong? Or when I have to read some book that makes no sense to me? Or when I try and publish a book and every publisher rejects it?"

Suddenly, Freddie understood.

"Sam," he said gently. "I-I get it. It's scary to think about failure. But no matter how good someone is at something, their going to make a mistake at some point. You just have to get past that. If a professor doesn't like your writing style, ask him to help you make it even better. If you don't understand a book, re-read it. And if a publisher rejects a story you write, you just find another publisher. That's just something that everyone has to face at some point."

"Not you," Sam said softly. "I've never seen you mess up once when it comes to computers."

Freddie gave her a small smile. "Oh yeah? You remember last month when I told you and Carly Neville had sent us a virus that made the iCarly site shut down for almost an entire day?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded.

"Well, I-I made that up," Freddie admitted. "I shut down the site by mistake. I was trying to update our video page and somehow wound up messing everything up."

"For real?" Sam frowned.

"For real," Freddie confirmed. He gripped Sam's hand. "Baby, look. If you don't want to pursue this, that's your choice. But don't let your own fears hold you back."

Sam nodded, looking into his eyes. "Okay."

Freddie kissed her gently.

"I have always wanted to write a book," Sam whispered.

"Then do it," Freddie told her. "I know you can."


	440. Chapter 440

_Baffle_

"You guys sure you can handle all the kids at the arcade?" Sam asked her husband as he put on his jacket.

"Yeah, you guys are gonna have eight kids with you," Carly pointed out.

"Gibby and I will be fine," Freddie said. "Besides, they'll practically watch themselves. Emma, Ashton, Quincy and Clarissa will be together the whole time and Tyler, Huey and Kirby will keep each other busy."

"What about Jason?" Sam pointed out.

"He's fourteen! He doesn't need to be watched," Freddie assured her. "Besides, he'll probably want to spend time with his old man at the pool table."

"Yeah, because _that's _every teenager's dream," Sam mumbled, rolling her eyes.

"We ready to go? The kids are all in the cars," Gibby said. "I have four in mine, five in yours."

"Yeah, I'm ready," Freddie nodded.

"This is gonna be so much fun!" Gibby said excitedly. "I'm gonna take down some little kids at air hockey!"

"You suck at air hockey, I beat you all the time," Sam frowned.

"Yeah, I know, that's why we didn't invite you," Gibby said, earning him a slap on the arm from Sam.

"What are you guys gonna do while we're gone?" Freddie asked.

"We're going to the mall," Carly said. "Where, for once, we won't have to deal with begging to go into every toy store we pass."

"I wanted to stay home and sleep," Sam said. "But she promised me churros…who am I to resist one of Mexico's finest delicacies?"

"We should be home around dinner time," Freddie said, giving his wife a quick kissed. "We'll pick up some pizzas on the way back."

"Cool, thanks," Sam said. "Have fun, nub."

"Call us if you need help with the kids!" Carly yelled after the men as they headed out the door.

"Alright, well if we're gonna do the mall, let's move," Sam said. "I want to get at least a quick nap in before they get back."

"Okay, let me just find my coupon for Schneider's Secret," Carly said, rummaging through her bag. "It's for half off a bra."

"Oh, I think I got that same coupon with my catalogue," Sam said. "I could use it too. Where'd I put it, though…?"

She looked through the stack of magazines on the coffee table and on the counter, but the catalogue was nowhere to be seen.

"I could've sworn I put it here," Sam frowned. "I just got it a few days ago."

"Did you bring it upstairs?" Carly suggested.

"I don't think so," Sam replied. "Hang on, I'll go check. I could've brought it up to the bedroom."

She headed upstairs and into her and Freddie's room, but the catalogue wasn't in there either.

"Ugh! The one time I decide to go shopping and I can't even get a cheap bra out of it," Sam moaned as she walked out of her room down the hall.

She passed by Jason's room, where the door was halfway open, and saw the lights were left on.

Rolling her eyes at her son's carelessness, Sam stepped into the room and flicked the switch off. Right as she was about to leave, though, she spotted a magazine sitting on Jason's bed.

At first glance, she had thought it was one of his science magazines he loved to read, but Sam then quickly realized that the cover of the magazine looked very familiar…

"What the-There's my catalogue," Sam frowned, walking over to the bed and grabbing it, a baffled expression on her face. "What is it doing in here?"

"Hey, did you find it?" Carly asked, joining Sam in the room.

"Yeah, it was in here," Sam nodded. "Weird, right? Why would it be-"

And suddenly, Sam connected the dots. "Oh my God! Jason took my magazine and was drooling over the half-naked models in it!"

"Wow," Carly chuckled.

"It's not funny, Shay!" Sam snapped. "He's way to young to be looking at this sort of stuff! He's a _kid_."

"He's fourteen," Carly shrugged. "Isn't that the age when boy start getting interested in girls and girls in bikinis and girls in-"

"No!" Sam retorted. "Not my kid! I can't believe this! Oh he is _grounded_."

"But he didn't even do anything," Carly said, somewhat amused.

"Oh be quiet," Sam mumbled, rolling up the catalogue in her hand angrily.

…..

"Look what I won, mommy!" six-year old Tyler exclaimed as him, Freddie and the rest of his siblings came back into the house later that afternoon. He was holding a giant stuffed dog wearing a fire hat.

"Wow, that thing is huge!" Sam grinned, scooping up her youngest son in her arms. "Good job, I bet you had to win a lot of tickets to get this guy."

"I may have helped him out a little," Freddie chuckled.

"Mom, look at this candy bar I got!" Emma said excitedly, holding up a slab of chocolate that was bigger than her face. "I can't wait to eat it all."

"You'll share it," Sam said firmly. "Mama _loves _nougat."

"You should've seen me at Skee Ball, mom, I was on _fire_!" Ashton said. "Can we go back to that arcade soon?"

"Sure, if your mom takes you," Freddie said, holding his stomach. "I think I got sick from that root beer pizza they had there."

"They had root beer pizza?" Sam repeated. "And you didn't bring me back any?"

"Sam, if I had brought you back any of that stuff, it would've disintegrated by now," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

Sam turned to Jason. "What about you?" Sam asked him. "Did you have fun?"

"I guess," Jason shrugged. "I'm going up to my room!"

Sam frowned as she watched her son run upstairs.

"Hey…baby?" Sam said as the twins and Tyler ran into the living room to watch T.V.

"Yeah?" Freddie replied, popping a few antacids into his mouth. "What's up?"

"Has Jason been acting…different?" Sam asked, crossing her arms.

"Um, what do you mean?" Freddie asked.

"I mean I found _this _in his room today!" Sam hissed, thrusting the Schneider's Secret catalogue at him. "He was going through it a gawking at the girls in there!"

"Really?" Freddie chuckled.

Sam narrowed her eyes. "Dude! Not funny!"

"Well Sam, he's a teenager now," Freddie shrugged. "You know, puberty and all."

"So what?" Sam snapped. "He's not allowed to be looking at this kind of stuff!"

"Okay, I'll go talk to him," Freddie said. "I'll tell him it's not right for him to drool over women like this. It's degrading and inappropriate and-"

"Just tell him to-to-ugh! I don't know!" Sam groaned.

"Sam, it's not that big a deal," Freddie told her. "Boys Jason's age do this sort of thing all the time. I remember when I was fourteen I took this _Beach Sports _magazine from Spencer and hid it my room and would just sort of look at it from time to time."

"Oh, so you like ogling girls in tiny bikinis?" Sam frowned, punching his shoulder hard.

"Ow!" Freddie exclaimed. "I was _fourteen_! We weren't even dating!"

"You're still a jerk," Sam mumbled darkly.

"Look, Sam, what do you want me to do?" Freddie asked. "I told you, I'll talk to Jason. You keep the magazine. What else is there?"

Sam didn't reply.

"Oh…" Freddie said slowly. "I get it now."

"What do you get?" Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"You're not so upset about Jason looking at the magazine," Freddie said, a smile creeping onto his face. "You're upset that he's growing up."

"Can it, Benson," Sam retorted. "That's ridiculous! I'm not one of those crazy, clingy moms who can't let go of her kid! Maybe you're confusing me with your _own _mother!"

"I don't know…" Freddie grinned. "You're acting almost exactly the way my mom did when she found that _Beach Sports _magazine in my room. I think she had that exact same expression…"

"Yeah, well…shut up!" Sam replied lamely.

"Baby, he has to grow up at some point," Freddie told her, squeezing her shoulder gently.

"I know," Sam sighed. "But does he have to make it so _obvious_? If I hadn't found that catalogue in his room I could've had at least another six months of getting to believe he was still a kid."

"Sorry," Freddie said, kissing her cheek. "I know it's rough."


	441. Chapter 441

_Insistence _

"Well, _that's _a new all time low for my dating career," Carly said bitterly as she stormed into her apartment, tossing her coat and bag onto the nearby chair.

"Your date with Troy didn't go well?" Sam frowned, pausing the movie she had been watching.

"It went _horrible_!" Carly replied. "Troy is practically the epitome of a disgusting boy. He talked with his mouth full the entire time at the restaurant, he must've burped at least a dozen times _and_ he called me _dude_."

"Huh…maybe I should've gone on that date," Sam smirked.

"You want me to set you up?" Carly asked.

"Nah," Sam sighed. "Mama's flying solo for now."

"But it's been six months since you've been on a date," Carly pointed out.

"Thanks, I've been keeping track too," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"I just think it would be good for you to maybe start seeing some new guys," Carly shrugged. "I mean I think it's good that you waited for a few months after you and Freddie broke up, since we all see each other so often, it could've gotten pretty weird, but I think a decent amount of time has passed now."  
"I'm not staying single just to not hurt that nub's feelings," Sam snapped. "I just like not having to deal with all the late-night phone calls and the hand holding and the uncomfortable dresses."

"Well okay," Carly conceded, sitting down next to her best friend. "I guess I have to end it with Troy, though. I just don't like breaking up with guys, it's so sad. Hey, what did you say to Freddie when you broke up with him? I could use some pointers."

"Um, I-I just told him we were better off as friends," Sam mumbled.

"Well I don't want to stay friends with this guy," Carly cringed. "But I guess maybe I can just say that to make him feel better…did Freddie take it well?"

"Yeah, he-he was fine," Sam said, looking down at her lap.

"So you really just told Freddie you wanted to just be friends and that was why you were breaking up with him?" Carly continued. "You didn't give him any reasons?"

Sam didn't reply.

"You know…you never did tell me _why _you and Freddie didn't work out," Carly said thoughtfully.

"I just told you, I wanted to just be friends with him," Sam said.

"Well what made you realize that?" Carly said. "I mean you don't wake up one morning and just say 'I don't like my boyfriend romantically anymore, I want to just be friends'. There has to be more of a backstory. So spill, Puckett."

"We-I don't want to talk about it," Sam mumbled.

"Come on, Sam, I'm your best friend," Carly smiled. "You can tell me. Was it because you didn't like all the geeky clubs he was in? Did his mom get to you?"

"Carly, please stop," Sam moaned. "I don't want to-"

"Did he just annoy you or something?" Carly asked. "I mean, that could've led you to wanting to break up with him and-"

"We broke up because of you, okay?" Sam finally snapped.

Carly blinked. "Because-Because of _me_?"

"Never mind," Sam said quickly. "Don't worry about it."

"How am I not supposed to worry about it?" Carly frowned. "I-I really made you guys break up? How? I-I didn't think I did anything…what did I do?"

Sam sighed. "You didn't exactly do it on purpose. Do you remember the night Spencer and that Jenna chick broke up?"

"Yeah," Carly nodded slowly.

"Well, um, you know how you gave them that whole speech about how they were forcing a relationship because of some tiny connection that they had and their relationship was unnatural and weird?" Sam continued.

"Yes, I remember," Carly said. "But what does that have to do with you and Freddie?"

"Freddie and I were standing at the top of the stairs the whole time," Sam admitted. "We-We heard every word. You might have been talking to Spencer and Jenna, but it was pretty obvious you might as well have been talking to us."

"That-That's why you broke up?" Carly said softly.

"You made a good point," Carly said heavily. "Our relationship was just weird…we fought a lot, we were completely different-"

"But you guys were a much better couple than Spencer and Jenna!" Carly exclaimed. "You _loved _each other."

Sam shrugged. "Didn't change how incompatible we were. So that night we decided to break up. It-It was actually mutual…I didn't exactly dump him like I said."

"I can't believe this…" Carly mumbled. "I made you guys break up with that speech?"

"Hey, don't feel guilty, kid," Sam said, giving her a small smile. "It-It was for the best."

Carly said nothing.

"I'm gonna run down to the lobby," Sam told her, getting to her feet. "I ordered a pizza a while ago and I just got a text that it's here."

"Sam, I-I'm really sorry," Carly whispered.

"Pfft, don't be," Sam said, pulling a grin onto her face. "You probably did us a favor."

Carly sighed as she watched Sam run out of the apartment.

_I can't believe I broke them up_, Carly thought sadly. _I made a huge mistake…_


	442. Chapter 442

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 317, where Sam got beat up by Dana after Sam broke up the Smash Party in iRescue Carly.**

…**.**

_Daytime_

"I sort of like this," Sam smirked as Freddie handed her a bottle of root hear while she laid on the sofa. "You waiting on me hand and foot."

"Well the doctor said you need to stay off your feet for a few days," Freddie shrugged, sitting down next to her. "Besides, how is this different from any normal day?"

"True," Sam agreed as she took a sip of her drink.

"So how you feeling?" Freddie asked.

"I'm fine," Sam scoffed. "Dana's punch is nothing compared to mine."

"She still hit you pretty hard," Freddie pointed out, gently placing an ice bag on a large bruise on her arm. "I'm just glad she's going off to jail. I can't believe she jumped you like that just for ruining her party."

"Yeah, well, the chick's crazy," Sam said, picking up her cellphone that had been buzzing.

"Who texted?" Freddie asked.

"Just one of my other prison friends," Sam sighed. "Dana's out of the hospital and apparently she's out on bail until her actual court hearing."

"What? How could they let her just run free like that?" Freddie exclaimed. "She attacked you!"

"Dude, chill, people make bail all the time, it's a thing," Sam told him.

"I just don't want her to hurt you again," Freddie said.

"Do you think you're dating some whimp like Carly?" Sam scoffed. "I can fight way better than Dana. The only reason she got a punch on me last time was because she had a bunch of other people holding me down for her."

"I dunno, I still don't like it…" Freddie said. "Just make sure you don't go looking for trouble."

"I won't," Sam said, avoiding her boyfriend's eyes.

Freddie frowned. "Sam?"

"What?" Sam asked, somewhat defensively.

"You _won't _go looking for Dana, will you?"

"You've seen me fight, I don't know why you're so paranoid," Sam snapped.

"Can you please just look me in the eye and tell me you won't see Dana," Freddie asked.

Sam sighed. "I-Look, there's this sort of…tradition among my old Juvie friends."

"Tradition?" Freddie repeated, not liking how this was sounding.

"When they're waiting to hear how bad their sentence is, the person meets face-to-face with whoever got them in the trouble in the first place," Sam told him.

"So you _are _going to meet her!" Freddie exclaimed.

"I have to!" Sam said. "If I don't…all the cred I still have left goes down the drain!"

"Who cares about your cred, Sam, you can get _hurt_!"

"For the last time, I can fight!" Sam argued. "These fights always bring a lot of people to watch…Dana won't be able to bring her little gang behind her to help her fight me or she'll just look weak in front of everyone."

"I don't want you doing this!" Freddie said firmly.

Sam narrowed her eyes. "You don't get to tell me what I can and can't do."

"So you're actually going to go through with this fight?" Freddie asked, crossing his arms. "When you know how I feel about it?"

"I already told them I'd be there," Sam said simply. "Tomorrow night in that alley behind El Guapo Taco."

"Sam, you're barely healed up!" Freddie told her. "_Please _don't do this."

"I'm doing it," Sam said. "Whether you like it or not."

"Yeah, well," Freddie said harshly, getting to his feet and heading to the door. "I don't."

And with that he left the house, slamming the door behind him.

…

Freddie didn't sleep at all that night, and the entire day he felt more nervous and anxious than he ever had before.

He didn't want to see Sam get into a fight. He knew she would probably beat that Dana chick, but what if she didn't? What if she got hurt even worse than last time.

He loved Sam, but he hated how stubborn she could be at times.

As daytime turned into nighttime, Freddie kept taking out his phone, about to call Sam. But every time he reminded himself that there was no way he was going to talk Sam out of this.

And so, still feeling overwhelming concern for his girlfriend, Freddie grabbed his keys, told his mom he was going out to buy soy milk, and headed into the night.

…..

When he arrived at the parking lot of El Taco Guapo, Freddie took a moment to look around and quickly realized this was by far the sketchiest environment he had ever been in. He spotted the alley that Sam had told him the fight was going to take place in and set off.

He could already hear laughs and screams and he braced himself for the worst as he turned into the alley.

A group of about ten teenagers stood there, all looking as though they had come out of Freddie's nightmares.

"Hey, we have a late-comer!" a large man that was nearly twice the size of Freddie jeered as Freddie stepped into the light of the single street lamp.

"Who's he?" another man demanded. "You know him, Dana?"

"Yeah, I know him!" Dana said as she stepped out from behind a tall girl. She glared at Freddie, and Freddie saw she looked even more menacing than she did at the Smash Party where he had last seen her. "That's Puckett's little boyfriend!"

"Pfft, even her dating choices have gone soft!" the tall girl laughed.

Freddie suddenly realized Sam was nowhere to be seen…Had she actually decided to _listen _to him and not show up.

"I-I don't want any trouble," Freddie said quickly. "I was just looking for Sam and-"

"Yeah, where _is _your little girlfriend?" Dana interrupted. "Is she too much of a goody two shoes to show up for a fight now?"

"She chickened out!" another girl from the crowd called out. "How pathetic!"

"Typical Puckett," Dana said, shaking her head as she stepped closer to Freddie. "She leaves the Juvie life behind and she forgets who she is."

"I-I'm just gonna go now if Sam's not here," Freddie said lamely, beginning to back away.

"No, stay, you just got here," Dana smirked, grabbing Freddie's arm and dragging him back forcefully. "After all, I came here looking for a fight. And since your precious girlfriend couldn't bother to show up, it looks like I'll just have to settle for _you_."

And with that she shoved Freddie hard onto the cold ground.

Freddie winced as his body hit the concrete. He looked up at Dana, who was laughing cruelly above him. He made to get up, but she shoved him back down again, this time causing his arm to scrape badly against the ground.

"Hey!" came a voice behind him all of the sudden.

He turned his head and saw Sam coming into the alley.

"Wow, look who finally decided to show up," said Dana as Sam rushed over to Freddie and helped him to his feet.

"Why'd you hit him?" Sam demanded. "You're supposed to fight _me_."

"Oh don't worry, I saved some for you too," Dana grinned as she thrust her fist at Sam.

Sam was quicker though. She caught Dana's fist and within a split of a second, she had her flipped laying on the ground where Freddie had just been. Sam looked around at the rest of the crowd.

"You all want some too?"

They all backed away slowly, Dana included.

"Then scram!" Sam yelled, and the teens went running.

Once she was sure everyone was gone, Sam turned to Freddie. "What are you doing here?"

"I was here to make sure _you _didn't get hurt!" Freddie said.

"Yeah but now you're hurt," Sam said softly, looking at his bleeding arm.

Freddie shrugged. "It's just a scratch. Nothing compared to what they did to you the other day."

Sam sighed. "Dana's not exactly the nicest girl…is she?"  
"I've gathered that," Freddie said sarcastically.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "I'm fine."

Sam looked at her feet. "Look…I was thinking. I shouldn't have gotten so mad at you because you didn't want me to come to this fight. You were just looking out for me…"

"Sam, I just love you so much," Freddie told her. "I-I don't want you to get hurt. Ever."

"I know," Sam whispered, gently taking his hand. "I don't want you to ever get hurt either. Next time I get pushed into a fight…I'm not doing it. No matter how much of my cred I lose."

"Well I'd say by the way you flipped Dana, your cred is pretty safe," Freddie grinned.

"Aw, thanks," Sam chuckled, standing on her toes to kiss him.

"Hey, since we're already at El Guapo Taco, wanna go get some tacos?" Freddie said once they broke apart.

"I thought you'd never ask," Sam smiled.


	443. Chapter 443

**AN-This is a sequel chapter 352, where the gang finds out that Sam is afraid of the ocean. Enjoy! Also, I just put a new story up, The Ten Year Gap. Be sure to check it out!**

…**.**

_Follow_

"-And that's how you get mustard stains off of cats!" Carly said into the camera as her and Sam did their weekly iCarly web show.

"Because there's nothing a cat hates more than mustard," Sam added.

"Next," Carly continued. "We're going to have our goofy pal, Gibby, show you how to deal with a crabby tarantula!"

Freddie moved the camera to show Gibby standing nervously next to a large cage with a single tarantula in it.

"You guys…I don't feel comfortable with this!" Gibby said.

"Well too bad, you're doing it," Sam said simply.

"Gib, we promise, that thing's totally harmless," Carly assured him. "Remember what we told you during rehearsal? Just don't put your fingers near its mouth and you'll be fine."

"I don't even know where its mouth _is_!" Gibby exclaimed.

"Just hurry up and do it so we can finish up the show," Sam said impatiently.

"I'm scared!" Gibby moaned.

"Oh come on!" Sam snapped. "What kind of moron is afraid of a spider?"

"It's better than being afraid of the ocean like _you _are," Gibby retorted.

At his words, Sam's eyes grew wide and Carly quickly looked towards Freddie for help.

"_What _did you say?" Sam yelled, lunging towards Gibby and tackling him to the ground. "You weren't ever supposed to repeat that you stupid lump of cat hair!"

"Ow! She's breaking my face!" Gibby screamed.

"Um, while we try and save Gibby's face, please enjoy this prerecorded video of a gopher at a child's tea party," Freddie said quickly, turning the camera onto himself. He pressed a few keys on the keyboard before setting the camera down and rushing over to where his girlfriend was currently trying to connect her fist with Gibby's nose.

"Sam! Sam, get off him!" Freddie said, attempting to grab Sam's arm.

"Sam, enough! You're gonna send him the emergency room again!" Carly yelled. "If he goes there for the second time this month, his mom's gonna start forbidding him to do the show with us!"

"He told the whole Internet I'm afraid of the ocean!" Sam screamed as Freddie finally managed to get her off Gibby.

"It was an accident!" Gibby defended.

"How could you do that, Gibby?" Freddie frowned.

"Well Gibby's can't keep secrets!" Gibby pointed out. "Why do you think my application for spy camp got rejected?"

"Okay, Sam…calm down," Carly said. "You look like you're about to kill something."

"I'm gonna kill Gibby if Fredwad would let go of me!" Sam snapped.

"No! I can't get killed today, it's a Thursday!" Gibby cried.

"Sam, it's not that big of a deal," Carly said quickly. "No one cares that you're afraid of the ocean."

"Yes they do!" Sam retorted. "I'm probably the laughing stalk of the Internet now!"

"Now that's a little extreme, don't you think?" Freddie said, rolling his eyes as he headed to the computer. "I bet right now as we speak, our comment boards are blowing up with people talking about their own fears and being supportive and-oh."

"What?" Sam frowned.

"Nothing," Freddie said, slamming his laptop close. "Hey, why don't we just end the show early and go out for ribs? I'm starving and-"

Sam grabbed the laptop from him and opened it up.

"'Who is afraid of the ocean?" she read from the comment board. "What does she think is gonna happen? A strain of sea weed might attack her?'"

"Oh…that was kind of rude," Carly said.

"'I always thought Sam Puckett was the toughest girl on the web," Sam continued. "'But I guess I can go find some four-year old to give that title to now.' You see? I _told _you it was embarrassing! Now everyone knows and I'm gonna be mocked forever!"

"Sam-" Freddie started, never seeing her so upset before.

But Sam shoved the laptop back into his arms and ran out of the room.

Freddie made to follow her, but he knew that she probably wanted to alone right now.

"Gibby!" Freddie moaned, turning back to his friend. "Why'd you have to do that? You knew she didn't want people to know about that!"  
"It slipped, I swear!" Gibby said.

"He didn't mean to," Carly sighed. "But now we know who we can't trust with secrets."

"Who?" Gibby asked.  
"You!"

"Man, these comments are getting worse," Freddie said, looking at the computer screen. "Poor Sam…I feel terrible."

"Well what are we going to do?" Carly asked. "We can't go back and have Gibby unsay what he did."

"No…" Freddie said thoughtfully. "Take the camera, Carly. I have an idea."

"What are you doing?" Carly asked, picking up the camera and pointing it at Freddie.

"You'll see," Freddie said.

"Okay," Carly said reluctantly. "In five, four, three, two, one!"

"No, you don't say-Hey there iCarly," Freddie said to the camera. "Well…a few minutes ago you just heard live on the web that the brave and mighty Sam Puckett is afraid of the ocean. Yeah…that's pretty embarrassing. It's just water, right? Well so what? Everybody is afraid of something stupid, Sam's no different. So all you people online right now, saying mean things about her and making fun of her better lay off, because I'm sure all of you are afraid of something a whole lot more embarrassing than the ocean...including me. Yeah, that's right…I, Freddie Benson, am the _king _of being afraid of stuff. I'm afraid of thunderstorms still. I'm also afraid of caterpillars and centipedes. And peacocks…ugh. Don't get me _started _on those. So if you want to pick on someone, pick on me. Unless you want _me _to personally send you a virus that will leave you without the Internet for weeks. Um…that's it. You can turn off the camera now, Carls. No! Not that button!"

He grabbed the camera himself and turned it off.

"Aw, Freddie!" Carly smiled. "That was so romantic! But, you do know that you're probably gonna get torn apart now."

"It's okay," Freddie said. "It's worth it."

"Hey, you think Sam won't try to kill me now?" Gibby asked.

"Um, you still might want to give witness protection a call," Carly told him.

…..

An hour later, Freddie headed out to his fireplace where, sure enough, his girlfriend was sitting.

"Hey," he smiled, sitting down next to her.

"Hey," she said softly, moving over so he could sit next to her.

"Look," Freddie said. "I think you have Gibby really scared for his life right now, so maybe if you could cut him a little bit of slack-"

"Relax, I'm not gonna go after him anymore," Sam told him. "I mean, I don't have to…not after what you did."

"Oh, you saw that?" Freddie smiled.

"You told the whole Internet your stupid fears so they would stop laughing at mine," Sam said. "I can't believe you did that."

"Eh, I'm already known as a geeky nub," Freddie shrugged. "It didn't hurt my reputation too much…Although I have gotten a few emails that could've been kinder."

Sam took his hand. "Thanks, baby."

"Anytime," Freddie said, kissing her temple. "Besides, someone once did the same thing for me a few years back."

Sam chuckled. "And we wound up at the same place, didn't we?"

"I believe so," Freddie nodded. He leaned down and kissed her gently for eight seconds.

"Hate you," he grinned when he pulled away.

Sam laughed. "Hate you too."


	444. Chapter 444

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 412, where Freddie found out Sam had an interview to try and get into an elite preforming arts college. **

…**.**

_Go_

"Remember, be sure to say hello and ask the interview how his day has been when he calls," Freddie said as Sam ran a brush through her hair. "And no rude comments about anything about him!"

"I know, I'm not an idiot," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Maybe I should take another look at your resume," Freddie said, pacing back and forth in Sam's room nervously. "And you can send him another copy before he calls and tells you whether you got into that school or not."

"No, it's fine," Sam said.

"Remember to bring up that time you helped with the Ginger Fox performance when he calls!" Freddie added. "That shows that you've made connections in the Biz."

"The 'Biz'?" Sam frowned.

"It's short for show business," Freddie said quickly. "Now, maybe you should have a song prepared or something."

"Why? They've already decided if I got in or not," Sam pointed out. "They're just calling to tell me."

"But that would make you stand out!"

"It would make me look _stupid_," Sam said. "Seriously, baby, chill. You're more freaked out than I am right now."

"I just want you do get in," Freddie said. "I mean I know you will, but I'm anxious I guess."

"Well don't be, you're just making me more nervous," Sam told him. She looked at her phone. "Okay, he-he's supposed to call any minute now."

"I'm sure it's gonna be with good news," Freddie said supportively.

Sam shook her head. "I-I stammered on a few lines during my monologue at my interview. And I think I was off key at some points during my song…"

"I'm sure a lot of the people they interviewed made little mistakes like that," Freddie reasoned. "It shouldn't stop you from getting in."

"Ugh! You don't get it, they'll reject me for any little thing they saw wrong with me!" Sam moaned. "If they didn't think I was perfect and fabulous, they won't let me in! I mean, it was a long shot just getting that interview in the first place."

"You earned that interview because you're fantastic at performing," Freddie said firmly. "And you deserve a spot in this school."

"That doesn't mean I'll get it," Sam sighed.

"Then that's their loss," Freddie said simply. "You'll find somebody else who actually appreciates your talent. Trust me, Sam, you're going to do great things. Whether it's with this school or some other school or on your own."

Sam gave him a small smile. "Yeah, I'm sure the fact that we're dating has nothing to do with you saying that."  
"Well it has something to do with me doing this," Freddie smirked, leaning down to give her a quick kiss. "But I'm serious. You don't give yourself credit for how amazing you really are."

"Well I guess we'll found out how amazing I am once I get that call," Sam mumbled. "I wish they would just hurry up and-"

Suddenly her phone began to ring.

"Oh my God, it's him!" Sam gasped. "Shh! Be quiet!  
"I wasn't talking," Freddie pointed out.

"Hello?" Sam answered, her voice sounding so sweet and un-Sam like that Freddie almost thought someone else was talking. "Hi, yes, this is Samantha Puckett. How are you today?"

_Wow, she can really sell it when she needs to_, Freddie observed.

"I'm good, thank you," Sam said, looking physically pained by having to sound so charming. "Yes…yes…oh. Okay," her face suddenly dropped. "Yes, I understand. Okay, well thanks for calling. Bye."

"Sam?" Freddie asked gently as Sam tossed her phone down. "You okay?"

"Um, yeah," Sam mumbled. "Yeah, I'm…whatever."  
"I told you," Freddie sighed. "You'll go to another school. If these people couldn't see how talented and gifted in performance you really are, then they don't deserve to-"

"Dude," Sam said, a grin creeping onto her face. "I got in."

"They don't deserve to-what?" Freddie frowned. "You got in? You got in! I-Sam! Come here!"

He wrapped his arms around her, sweeping her off her feet as he spun her around before kissing her passionately.

"I got in!" Sam repeated when they pulled apart. "They told me they thought I could really make it!"

"Well duh!" Freddie exclaimed. "I'm so proud of you, baby. This is huge! This is _lobster _huge. Come on, I'm taking you out. We're gonna celebrate tonight."

"Wait, let me get dressed," Sam laughed. "I'm just wearing sweatpants."

"Who cares? You look beautiful and you just got yourself into one of the best performing arts colleges in the country," Freddie said. "So you're entitled to wear whatever you want while chowing down on fifty dollar lobsters."

"Whoa, you're really breaking out that boy wallet, aren't you?" Sam said.

"It's worth it," Freddie said, kissing her again. "Totally worth it."


	445. Chapter 445

**AN-This one is rated T :)**

…**..**

_Contrary_

"Wait 'till you try these brownies, Sam, you're gonna have to hold onto your taste buds," Freddie grinned, sliding a tray into the oven.

"I'm not putting one of those disgusting health brownies anywhere near my mouth," Sam said simply, flipping through a magazine.

"They're gonna taste like any normal, unhealthy brownie," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Dad made brownies?" thirteen-year old Tyler exclaimed, running into the kitchen.

"Ha! At least someone's excited for them!" Freddie said proudly. "You know what, Ty? You can have the first brownie when these come out of the oven."

"Tell him what you put in them," Sam smirked.

"Sam, stop trying to-"

"What's in them, dad?" Tyler asked.

"Well…" Freddie said slowly. "There's flour, some cocoa powder, an egg…cooked spinach, sugar-"

"You put spinach in the brownies?" Tyler yelled. "What kind of monster does that?"

"Thanks, Sam," Freddie said as Tyler ran out of the room, still making gagging noises.

"It's your own fault for corrupting brownies," Sam shrugged, getting to her feet. "Good thing I have some real brownies stored upstairs."

"Real brownies…ha!" Freddie scoffed as his wife left the kitchen. "She'll see, these brownies are going to taste delicious and she'll be begging me to have some. Contrary to popular belief, not everything that's tasty has to be bad for you."  
He opened the oven door, eager to get a scent of his creation.

Once the scent hit his nose, though, he nearly passed out.

"Ugh! Those smell horrible!" Freddie frowned. "Stupid health recipe!"

He closed the oven door and headed over to the medicine cabinet to find some nausea medicine for the churning feeling he now felt in his stomach.

When he opened the cabinet, a small, circular item fell out.

"What's this?" Freddie said to himself, picking it up. He saw that the item had tiny little pills in it, and once he got a closer look at it, he realized it was birth control.

_Weird, I thought Sam kept this in our bathroom,_ Freddie said. _Guess she moved it._

"Now _these _are brownies, Frednub," Sam said, returning with a box of spinach-free brownies. "Do us all a favor and keep your precious vegetables in your salads."

"It was a good idea, you know," Freddie said. "Don't I at least get credit for that?"

Sam gave him a quick kiss. "Nope."

"Just give me a brownie," Freddie mumbled, taking one from his wife.

"What's in your hand?" Sam asked, looking at the birth control container still in Freddie's hand.

"Oh, this fell out of the cabinet," Freddie said. "Why'd you move it down here? You take it right before you go to bed, so wouldn't it make more sense to have it up in our bathroom."

Sam looked confused for a second before her eyes suddenly grew wide. "Um…okay, baby? I-I guess this is a sign that it's time for you to find out. Just-Just take another brownie before I tell you something that really doesn't need to blown out of proportion, but you'll probably do just that."

"What are you talking about?" Freddie asked. "I don't care where you store your birth control. You're the one taking it. As long as you can remember to come down here every night I don't really-Wait…are you-Sam, you're pregnant!"

"What?" Sam exclaimed.

"That's why you moved this down here, you don't need it anymore!" Freddie beamed. "Wow, Sam…this is great! We're gonna have another baby!"  
"No," Sam said. "We're not."

"You know, I _thought _you've been acting funny these last few days," Freddie grinned. "You've been moody and, well, I didn't want to say anything, but you've looked a little bloated and-"

Sam shoved him hard, cutting him off. "I am _not _pregnant!"

"Oh," Freddie said, looking like a deer in headlights. "Well then, um, have I told you how thin you looked lately?"

"Nice try, nub," Sam snapped.

"Well if you're not pregnant," Freddie said, massaging the spot on his hip where Sam had shoved him into the counter. "Then what is that I'm apparently about to find out-"

Suddenly Freddie grew silent as he stared down at the ring of birth control in his hand. On the side of the package was a small sticker from the pharmacy. But it wasn't Sam's name that was on it. The sticker read Emma Benson.

"No!" Freddie yelled. "No, no, no! What the-Since when-Why-"

"Sit down, breathe," Sam said, guiding her flabbergasted husband to the kitchen table. "Deep breaths, baby, deep breaths."

"Sam…" Freddie said, trying to keep his voice level. "Would you mind explaining to me why our seventeen-year old daughter is taking _birth control_?"

"Um, why don't you try and control that little tick your eye's doing right now first," Sam said.

"Why is Emma on birth control?" Freddie asked again, his voice shaking.

Sam sighed. "Look, she's seventeen. Her and Quincy have been dating for almost two years. It-It's normal to expect them to start feeling urges-"

"No!" Freddie yelled. "No urges! She's too young for _urges_!"

"Calm down!" Sam said. "You're face is turning really red, Freddie."

"Why-You knew about this?" Freddie hissed.

"She asked me if she could start taking it," Sam admitted.

"So you knew our daughter was having sex and you didn't stop it?"

"Freddie, seriously, _calm down_," Sam said. "I talked to Emma. Like _really _talked to her when she came to me about this. I explained to her that she needs to be responsible and make sure she's ready for any decision she makes, and that she needs to be careful, but that we trusted her-"

"Oh you practically gave her permission!"

"I didn't give her permission!" Sam said. "But you know teenagers. If she came to me and told me she wanted to start taking birth control and I told her no and that she wasn't allowed to have sex, you think she would've listened? No! She would've done it anyway without birth control. Would you rather her be on birth control or have her come to us pregnant? Huh? Are you ready to be a grandpa? You think Emma and Quincy are ready to be parents?"

"I-No!" Freddie groaned. "But she still shouldn't be having sex! She's just a little girl! _My _little girl."

"She's seventeen," Sam said gently. "She's growing up."

Freddie said nothing.

"You know how much her and Quincy love each other," Sam said. "And you know Quincy isn't the type of guy who would pressure her into anything she isn't ready for. And when I talked to her, she said she didn't even know if her and Quincy were going to _have _sex yet, but she wanted to be ready in case they did. You see, she was responsible to at least plan in advance."

Freddie still didn't say anything.

"I'm _glad _Emma felt comfortable enough to come and talk to me about this," Sam continued. "Because if she didn't, like I said, they probably would've wound up doing it anyway. Shouldn't you be happy that our kids and us have a relationship where they can come to us about this kind of thing."

"She didn't come to me," Freddie pointed out.

"Dude," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "You're her _dad_. How awkward would it have been for both of you to have that conversation?"

_Good point_, Freddie thought to himself.

"I should've told you earlier," Sam sighed. "But I knew you'd overreact. I know how protective you are of the twins and that you still like to think of them as your little girls, but-"

"I don't want her doing…_that _kind of stuff yet!" Freddie said.

"She may not even be doing anything! I told you, she just wanted to start taking birth control to be ready!"

Freddie shook his head. "I don't like this Sam. Not one bit."

….

Later that evening, Freddie was still fuming as he came downstairs. He couldn't believe his daughter was even _thinking _about sex…He had half a mind to go over to Gibby's house and teach Quincy a lesson! And the fact that Sam _knew _and wasn't trying to stop it…

He went into the living room, where Emma herself was sitting on the sofa, flipping through the channels.

Freddie pursed his lips. What happened to her thinking boys were disgusting and practically running out the room whenever him and Sam would so much as _kiss_.

"What?" Emma said, looking over at her father.

"I-Nothing," Freddie said heavily. "Or actually…we need to talk."

"Why?" Emma frowned.

"Emma…sweetie," Freddie sighed. "I-I know you're seventeen now. You're not a little girl anymore…you're a young woman. And-And I just want to let you know that-that I trust you, okay? As much as I would love to control your life and make every decision for you…I know I can't do that. I trust that you'll always do what you think is right and-and make wise decisions for yourself."

"Um…okay?" Emma said, giving her father a strange look as the doorbell rang. "Oh! That's Quincy. Bye, dad, I'll see you tonight."

"You-You're going out with Quincy tonight?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah, that's okay, right?"

"I guess," Freddie mumbled as Emma ran to the door.

She opened it up, revealing Quincy standing on the front step with a bouquet of flowers. "Hey," he smiled at Emma, handing her the flowers. "I got you these."

"Aw," Emma grinned. "How come?"

"Because," Quincy shrugged. He leaned down and gave her a quick kiss. "You ready to go?"

"Yeah," Emma said, her eyes sparkling. "Let's go."

Freddie dug his fingers into the couch cushion, using all his willpower not to go grab Emma's hand and lock her away in her room for the rest of her life.

Sometimes, trusting your kids was the scariest thing you could do.


	446. Chapter 446

_Pose_

"See, now what I don't understand is why this train didn't just go _around _the hill," Gibby said, shaking his head as he flipped through the children's book he was reading. "It would've saved him so much effort!"

"Because it's trying to teach kids to work through barriers in life," Freddie said. "And to never give up."

"But shouldn't we be teaching kids to find the solution that requires them to use the least amount of energy?" Gibby frowned.

"Gib, kids are lazy enough nowadays," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Don't ruin one of the few stories that actually still motivates them. I mean, we don't want to end up with a generation of Sams, right Sam?"

"And she fell asleep," Freddie smiled, looking down at his girlfriend, who was resting her head on his shoulder, deep in her slumber.

"You know, it is getting sort of late…" Carly yawned. "I'm pretty tired myself…Yup, pretty tired."

"You trying to politely kick Gib and I out?" Freddie asked knowingly.

"Well yeah," Carly admitted.

"Alright, I need to get some sleep anyway," Freddie said. "I need to wake up early so I can ship that DVD of our best iCarly clips to that Teen Web Awards competition."

"Oh yeah," Carly nodded. "You know, I like web competitions that don't require us flying across the world on questionable planes full of possums."

"_I _wasn't invited to that!" Gibby said indignantly. "I could've checked some species off of my possum explorer's guide list!"

"Um, you-you weren't exactly relevant back then," Carly told him.

"It is pretty easy for us, just having to send in this DVD to compete," Freddie said, getting to his feet and heading over to his tech cart. "Hey…where is the DVD? I thought it was here."

"I thought so too," Carly frowned. "That's where Sam was supposed to put it."

"Sam," Freddie said, shaking her shoulder. "Sam, wake up."

"What?" Sam moaned. "Go away, Fredifer, I'm sleeping!"

"Where's the DVD of our iCarly skits I'm supposed to bring to the post office to send tomorrow morning?" Freddie asked.

"I put it on your stupid tech cart like you said to," Sam mumbled, closing her eyes again.

"Um, no you didn't," Freddie said. "Because if you did, it would be there. Which it's not."

"Yes it is!"

"Sam, I just looked," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Well then your eyes are as defective as your brain," Sam said simply.

"You know, your tech cart is a little cluttered," Carly pointed out. "Maybe if you got rid of some of that stuff-"

"Get rid of-How dare you!" Freddie gasped. "That _stuff _is valuable!"

"It's junk," Sam said, her eyes still closed. "Maybe that's why you can't find the DVD that I _did _put over there. If you got rid of some of that junk you'd find it in no time."

"Says the girl who can't find any of her textbooks because her room is filled with food wrappers."

"Watch it…" Sam warned.

"Look, it's late, and if I don't get to bed soon, I'm gonna turn into Crabby Carly," Carly said. "Just come over here tomorrow and clean off your tech cart and I'm sure you'll find the DVD. And if not, Sam will personally remake it."

"What?" Sam exclaimed, her eyes flying open.

"Fine," Freddie said, satisfied. He leaned down to give Sam a quick kiss. She kissed him back, but still glaring at him.

"Let's go, Gib," Freddie said.

"Seriously, I would've been such a better train than this chump," Gibby said, closing his copy of _The Little Engine That Could _andshaking his head as he followed Freddie out of the studio.

"Can you believe the nerve of that nub?" Sam said as the boys closed the door behind them. "Accusing me of not putting the DVD where it was supposed to go. I should've kicked his dorky butt into Canada!"

"Wow…it's so nice how sweet you are to your boyfriend," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"He deserves it," Sam said, rifling through her bag to find the sweatpants she had brought over to sleep in. "He should no better than to-uh-oh."

She pulled out the DVD of iCarly clips.

"So you _didn't _put it on the tech cart," Carly said.

"Well I thought I did!" Sam defended. "And then I-Oh I know, I got distracted by this funny video Wendy sent me of an elephant running after a congressman."

"Well just go run across the hall and give Freddie the DVD," Carly shrugged.

"No!" Sam said firmly. "He doesn't get to be right!"

"But he was right," Carly frowned.

"Well he doesn't get to know that!" Sam snapped. She went over to the cart and placed the DVD underneath several loose cords. "There. Now when he comes over tomorrow he'll think it was there all along, like I said, and he'll have to admit _I _was right."

"I'm too tired to point out how wrong this is," Carly said, shaking her head. "But just know…it's wrong."

…..

"Alright, I guess I'll humor Sam and look again for this DVD, but I know it's not here," Freddie said the next morning as him and Gibby walked into the studio. "And of course, I'll be the one who winds up redoing the DVD because Sam will bat her eyes and do that one thing with her tongue-"

"Ugh!" Gibby cringed. "I just had my Fiber-O's!"

"I can't believe she called this stuff junk," Freddie said, ignoring Gibby's comment. "Who would call a 64 gigabyte external hard drive junk?"

"Hey man, I just want to go to the Pottery Barrel," Gibby said.

"We will, after I have the DVD to send at the post office," Freddie said, moving a few items around. "You know, this tech cart is like a child to me. And what kind of parent just throws away parts of their child? A _sick _parent, that's what kind. Seriously, without half this stuff, iCarly just wouldn't-Ah!"

"What?" Gibby gasped, startled. "Is it a spider? Kill it!"

"No," Freddie said, slowly picking up the DVD. "I-I found the DVD."

"Oh," Gibby shrugged. "Well then I guess Sam was right after all."  
"Gibby!" Freddie snapped. He stared back down at the DVD. "Oh man…this is bad. This is _real _bad."

"Why? You have the DVD, now we can go to Pottery Barrel," Gibby pointed out.

"No, don't you realize what this means?" Freddie said. "If Sam finds out she was right all along, I'll never hear the end of it! I'll be hearing about this until I'm ninety!"

"But she was right," Gibby replied.

"Well she's not going to know that!" Freddie said. He took a deep breath and broke the disk in half.

"What did you do that for?" Gibby yelled.

"I'm destroying the evidence," Freddie said. "Trust me, it's for the best."

"But now I'm gonna have to wait for you to make a new DVD before we can go to Potter Barrel!" Gibby moaned. "They're gonna be all out of glow-in-the-dark bath mats by the time we get there!"

"You can go without me," Freddie said. "Just promise me, Gibby, _Sam never finds out about this_."

….

About an hour later, Freddie was sitting in the Shay's kitchen, working on the DVD when Sam came downstairs.

"Hey," she said pleasantly.

"Morning," Freddie said as she leaned down and kissed him.

"So," Sam said, grabbing a bottle of orange juice. "Did you look through your tech cart again this morning for that DVD?"

"Yup," Freddie said simply. "I did."

"Uh-huh…and did you find it?"

"Nope," Freddie said, causing Sam to almost choke on her orange juice.

"What do you mean?" Sam exclaimed.

"I mean you must've misplaced it, baby, because I took everything off that cart and I still couldn't find it," Freddie replied. "But don't worry, I started redoing the DVD myself."

_That's impossible, I __**just **__put that DVD there last night! _Sam thought to herself.

Letting out a groan of frustration, Sam ran back up to the studio and looked underneath the cords she had placed the DVD under the previous night.

"What the-where is it?" Sam frowned. "It was right there and-oh…"

Slowly, Sam began to connect the dots. Freddie must've done the exact same thing she did in order to keep _her _from being right.

She had to admit, she was mildly impressed. She couldn't even tell Freddie she knew he moved it because she would have to admit that she put the DVD there after he left last night and wind up proving she had been wrong in the first place

"Okay," Sam said slowly. "If that's how he wants to play...He'll learn the hard way, though, you can't beat Mama."

All she had to do was make a _new _DVD, pretend it was the original, hide it back on the tech cart, and she'd be ahead again. Freddie wouldn't be able to say that he had taken the original, after all, without admitting defeat.

Sam smirked as she grabbed her laptop to set off to work. Freddie might be smart, but when it came to things like this, _she _was the genius.

…

"Sam? What are you doing?" Carly frowned, walking into her room a few hours later, seeing Sam frantically typing away on her laptop.

"Trying to make a new DVD, but it's so dang hard!" Sam exclaimed.

"But I thought you put the original DVD on Freddie's tech cart," Carly said. "You know, in your quest to prove you were right…when you were wrong."

"Well that nub got the same idea and must've got rid of the DVD to show that he was right because he thought _he _had been wrong!" Sam replied.

"Okay…I thought you two had a confusing relationship before, but this is ridiculous!" Carly said, shaking her head.

"This is gonna be great," Sam said, apparently not hearing her best friend. "I'm gonna put this new DVD back on Freddie's cart and then I'll make sure I'm there when he discovers it! He won't be able to do a dang thing without admitting he was wrong all along! Ha!"

"So you and Freddie have spent pretty much the entire day working on this DVD just to prove one another wrong…" Carly observed. "You realize all of the more productive things you could've been doing with this time? You could've gone shopping or done some homework or did yoga with me!"

"You don't do yoga," Sam scoffed.

"Well I started today, and I'm pretty good at that laying-on-the-floor pose!" Carly snapped.

"Yes! I'm done!" Sam said triumphantly, taking the disk out of her computer. "And now to plant this baby on his cart again."

"You and Freddie make absolutely no sense!" Carly called after Sam as she ran out of the bedroom.

"That's why you love us!" Sam smirked.

"Yeah, yeah," Carly smiled.

….

Sam ran up to the studio, quickly placing the new DVD under the some papers.

She then ran to the top of the stairs. "Frednub! Come up here!"

"No, I'm working on this DVD still because _somebody _lost the original copy!" he yelled back.

"Come on, my tongue is bored and I wanna make-out," Sam said, knowing that would get him.

Sure enough, Freddie was upstairs three seconds later.

"Oh, I thought you were working?" Sam grinned.

"I needed a break," Freddie said simply, wrapping his arms around her.

"Hold on, in here," Sam said, opening the door to the studio and leading her boyfriend inside, conveniently stopping by the tech cart. She put her arms around her neck, standing on her toes to kiss him deeply.

The two stayed like that for several moments, and just when Sam figured Freddie was distracted enough, she suddenly pulled away.

"You okay?" Freddie asked, his face flushed.

"Yeah," Sam said sweetly. "Hey, what's that thing on your tech cart there?"

"On my tech cart?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah, underneath those papers," Sam nodded. "It looks like some sort of DVD."

Freddie picked up the papers, revealing the DVD Sam had just placed.

His eyes grew wide.

_How did that get there? _he thought frantically. _I destroyed it! There's no way it could've gotten-Oh! Oh…She made a new copy! __**That's **__what she was doing up here all day! I can't believe her! Well, she's not winning that easily…_

"Hey, it's the DVD!" Freddie said. "Wow, this saves me time finishing up the new copy downstairs."

"Yeah, I guess it does," Sam said, her eyes sparkling. "So is there anything you would like to say?"

"Yeah, I should go find Carly and thank her for finding this," Freddie said. "She must've found it somewhere earlier today and put it here for me. Wasn't that considerate of her?"  
Sam's smile fell. "_Or_," she said. "It was here all along like I _said_."

"No, I don't think so," Freddie said brightly. "I mean I did search this entire cart. My twenty-twenty vision is something I pride myself on, so I doubt I missed it."

"Well you _did_," Sam frowned. "Because that DVD was here the entire time!"

"No it wasn't!" Freddie retorted. "I know for a fact when I came in here and looked this morning, there was no DVD under those cords!"

"You're just being-" Sam started, but then she paused. "Wait…you just found the DVD under those papers…Why would you say anything about those cords?"

"I-I-I didn't," Freddie said lamely. "I just-"

"Boom!" Sam yelled victoriously, jumping up in the air. "Ha! I win! You had to have found that DVD here this morning and then destroyed it to prove you were right! Well not today, nub, because _I _was right. You're gonna have to wake up earlier than that to try and outsmart Sam Puckett!"

"Fine, fine, you win!" Freddie snapped. "Now can you please just be an adult and not brag about it?"

"Nah, I'm feeling pretty braggy," Sam said happily as she continued to dance around.

"Hold on…" Freddie said slowly. "You must've known all along that the DVD was under those cords since you were so quick to point that out…If you knew they were there, why didn't you just say something last night and proved me wrong on the spot?"

"I-I was tired," Sam said quickly.

"No," Freddie said, a smile creeping onto his face. "You knew exactly where on the cart the DVD was because you must've put it there last night after you realized that _you _were wrong! Ha! I win! Boom, baby!"

"Okay, okay, whatever!" Sam said, crossing her arms. "Now be an adult like you said and shut your mouth."  
"Nah, I'm feeling pretty braggy," Freddie smirked. "I win, I win, I _win!"  
_"The only thing you'd ever win is a game show to find out who was the biggest freak in America!" Sam snapped.

"Aw, baby, are you feeling a little bitter because you _lost_?"

"Shut up!"

"Sounds like something a _loser _would say."

"Dude…you're this close to getting a Texas Wedgie."

"Fine, I'll stop," Freddie conceded. "Now that I had my little gloating session, I'm willing to put this behind us and forget all about it. Now would you like to come with me to the post office to send in this DVD once and for all? We can get some churros after…"

Sam rolled her eyes. "Okay…I guess."

"Great," Freddie smiled, reaching into this pocket for his wallet. "I actually have these coupons for some churros. Two for one…Now where did I put my wallet…Wait, Sam! You took my wallet!"

But Sam was already running down the stairs, laughing.


	447. Chapter 447

**AN-This chapter is rated T too :)**

…

_Goody_

"So let's let the girl's night festivities begin!" Carly said happily as her and Sam sat up in her room. "We have cheesy movies, nail polish, cookie dough, and tons of fashion magazine."

"Oh goody…" Sam said, her voice dripping in sarcasm. "You sure this isn't Carly Night?"

"Come on, this is the one night I've finally been able to drag you away from Freddie," Carly said. "Can't you improve your attitude?"

"Sorry, I can only act so excited for nail polish," Sam replied.

"Which movie should we watch first?" Carly asked, ignoring Sam's comment. "The one where the girl tries to get over her ex-boyfriend by staring her own garlic business, or the one where the girl is actually dating a set of identical twins, but doesn't realize?"

"I don't know," Sam sighed. "They both sound horrible."

"Sam!" Carly moaned, frustrated. "If you didn't want to hang out tonight, you should've just said so!"

"I do!" Sam said quickly. "It's just…listen, could-could we actually skip to the, um, _girl talk _part of the night?"

"You hate girl talk," Carly frowned.

"Well…I sort of have something on my mind," Sam admitted.

"Oh! Okay!" Carly said excitedly, tossing the movies aside. "Well then spill! What's up? Is it about you and Freddie?"

"Um…sort of," Sam nodded.

Carly let out a gasp. "Are you guys okay?"

"Yeah, we're fine," Sam said. "We're really good, actually. That's sort of the problem."  
"Huh?" Carly said, confused. "What do you mean?"

"I mean…you know we've been dating for like, ten months now, right?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," Carly nodded.

"It's just…well, don't repeat this, but I really love him," Sam said heavily.

"Well duh!" Carly laughed. "Anybody could see that, you guys are adorable together! I'm still not seeing the problem, though."

"I mean…Freddie and I spend a ton of time together and everything," Sam said. "And we probably make-out like, five or six times a day-"

"I'd say ten," Carly said.

"Same thing," Sam said dismissively. "Anyway, we, you know, make-out a lot, but-but that's all we do. And-And I just think, well, I really think, I-I want to go further with him."

Carly's eyes widened. "You-You mean…_further_."

"Yes, Carly, as in _sex_," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"I-Wow," Carly said.

"Yeah," Sam said, her cheeks slightly reddening. "I just don't know how to bring it up to Freddie. I know guys are usually the eager ones in the relationship when it comes to that, but you know Freddie. He likes taking things slow and being reasonable and blah, blah, blah."

"Yeah, that-that does sound like him," Carly nodded.

"So what do I do?" Sam asked. "I mean, you haven't ever…you know?"

"No," Carly said. "I'm still trying to find a date to a prom, after all. But, um…well, I guess if I was in your situation, I-I'd talk to Freddie."

"Ugh! You weren't supposed to say that!" Sam moaned.

"Well Sam, it's kind of something that would require _both _of you," Carly pointed out.

"But it's gonna be so awkward," Sam said. "And-And…what if he doesn't want to?"

"Well then at least he knows you're ready, so he'll let you know when _he's_ ready then," Carly said. "But he might be just as ready as you! That's why you need to talk to him."

"Yeah…I guess I can't get out of that," Sam sighed. She rested her chin on top of her knees. "But what if…never mind."

"No, tell me," Carly said.

"What if…what if I'm really bad at it?" Sam mumbled under her breath. "I mean…I don't have experience."

Carly laughed. "Well neither does Freddie! I mean, I can't exactly give you any pointers, but I think that once you and Freddie, you know…_start_, it will just sort of…come to you. It will probably won't be like something out of the movies the first time, but that's what's special about it!"

Sam grinned. "You really think so?"

"Sure," Carly nodded. "Everyone has to start out with no experience at some point, right?"

"Yeah…that's true," Sam said. "Okay, I-I guess I can talk to Freddie tomorrow."

"Great, let me know how it goes," Carly said. "But, um, you don't have to give me the _whole _story."

…..

The next evening, Sam knocked on Freddie's door, feeling nervous, anxious, and a little bit excited.

"Hey," Freddie smiled, opening up a few seconds later, wasting no time in pulling Sam into his arms, kissing her deeply.

"Hey yourself," Sam smirked when they finally pulled away, resting her head on his chest.

"Good news," Freddie said, his hands still wrapped around her waist. "My mom is working a double shift at the hospital tonight. We have the apartment to ourselves until tomorrow afternoon."

"Awesome," Sam said, craning her neck up to kiss him again. "It will be much more relaxing around here without Crazy trying to sterilize me every five minutes."

Freddie chuckled. "Hey, wait here, I picked up some Fat Cakes for us to have."

"You mean for _me _to have," Sam corrected.

"It was worth a try," Freddie sighed, retreating into the kitchen.

Sam bit the corner of her lip, trying to work up the nerve to talk to Freddie. She really wasn't good at this sort of stuff…

"So, um, Freddie?" Sam said, joining her boyfriend in the kitchen. "I, um…I wanted to sort of talk to you about something."

"Oh," Freddie said. "Well…that's a coincidence. I, um, actually wanted to talk to you about something tonight too."

"Oh!" Sam said. "Well…go ahead. What's up?"

"No, you can go first," Freddie said quickly. "You were about to anyway."

"No, that's okay," Sam said, happy to get an excuse to postpone this. "Go ahead."

"I-Alright," Freddie conceded. "It's…here, come sit down."

He led Sam to the kitchen table.

"Is everything okay?" Sam frowned.

"What? Yeah!" Freddie nodded. "Yeah, it's-it's nothing like that. I just…look, Sam, you know I love you, right? More than anything in this world."

"I know," Sam smiled.

"And-And these past ten months and sixteen days of us dating have been…incredible. I wouldn't trade them for anything."

"Um…where are you going with this?" Sam asked slowly. "Because this kind of sounds like a break-up speech…"

"No!" Freddie exclaimed at once. "No, I'm not breaking up with you, Sam! I just…look, this is a little…_awkward _to bring up. I just want to let you know how much I love you because-because I want you to know I _really _love you. And-And I think we're really going to spend the rest of our lives together. And, you know, when-when a guy _really _loves a girl, he-he gets _those _feelings. And-And I-I don't want to pressure you into anything, but I just want to let you know, that-that I think maybe it would be a good idea for us to _discuss _possibly taking our relationship to _that level_ at some point in the future."

Sam raised an eyebrow and then, not being able to help herself, began laughing.

"Obviously I don't want us to do anything until you're completely ready," Freddie said quickly. "I don't care _how _long you want to wait. But I just want to put it out there that-"

"Baby," Sam said, taking his hands. "That's-That's exactly what I wanted to talk to _you _about!"

"You-Really?"

"Yes," Sam nodded. "I-I feel ready too. I love you so much…"

"You have no idea how happy I am to hear you say that," Freddie said, kissing her again.

Sam smiled into his lips, feeling her heart race. "You said your mom wouldn't be back until tomorrow?" she whispered into his ear when they pulled apart.

"That's right," Freddie said, his voice heavy with lust.

"Then why don't we head into your room?" Sam said, wrapping her arms around his neck.

Freddie nodded eagerly. "I'm liking the sound of that."


	448. Chapter 448

_Sticky_

Sam lay on her couch in her living room, flipping through channels as she watched Frothy wrestle with an old pillow across the room.

She heard her front door open and her mother stepped in.

"Yo," Pam Puckett greeter her daughter, tossing her jacket onto the floor. "Aw Frothy! That's the pillow the hot truck driver left here, it was still sticky from his special beard goop!"

Sam rolled her eyes at her mother's comment. "We're out of food," she said.

"Fine, I'll order take-out," Pam said, sitting down next to Sam. "Hey, shouldn't you be out with Benson? It's Friday night."

"His mom is making him spend the night knitting with her," Sam replied.

"Pfft, who still knits?" Pam scoffed.

"Apparently her," Sam shrugged.

"So," Pam continued. "You and Muscles have been together, what, a month?"

"A year," Sam corrected, not at all surprised her mother didn't know that.

"A year…" Pam repeated. "Huh, that's a long time."

"Yup."

"Hey," Pam said a bit awkwardly. "Here's a crazy idea…why don't you bring the guy over here tomorrow night?"

"What?" Sam frowned.

"Yeah, you know, for dinner," Pam said.

"Um…why?"

"What? A mom can't have her kid's boyfriend over for a meal?" Pam defended.

"Normal mom's can, sure," Sam said slowly. "You, on the other hand…"

"You go over to his house for dinner all the time!" Pam pointed out.

"Well yeah," Sam smirked. "Because his mom's crazy and uses those dinners as a chance to interrogate me to make sure I'm not hurting her precious son. Since when do you care about the guys I date?"

"Just invite him to dinner tomorrow or you're grounded!" Pam said firmly.

"Do you even know _how _to ground someone?" Sam said.

"Do it or I'm ordering you vegetable pizza instead of your Meat Slam!"

"Fine, okay, jeez!" Sam surrendered. "I'll tell him he's eating dinner here tomorrow."

"Good," Pam said proudly. "I'll even cook."

"Guess I should tell him to have poison control on speed dial too…" Sam mumbled under her breath.

…

"Your mom wants to have me over for dinner?" Freddie frowned

"Yeah," Sam sighed as her and Freddie sat with Carly in the Shay's apartment the next day. "I know, it's weird. So just come over and humor her."

"Sam, it's not weird," Freddie said. "I think it's nice your mom's making an effort to get more involved in your life."

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "I mean has she even _talked _to Freddie since you two started dating last year?"

"Once," Freddie replied. "I came to pick up Sam one night and she asked for my personal opinion on her new bikini." He gave a visible shudder.

"My mom was probably forced to read those parenting magazines they have in her plastic surgeon's waiting room," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "You know, I bet she forgets all about this tonight. We'll probably be waiting all night for her to get home tonight."

"Sam, maybe she's just trying to be a better parent," Carly said. "She might've realized that you'll be an adult soon and she wants to try and create some of those nice mother-daughter memories before it's too late."

"Yeah," Freddie agreed. "I for one am looking forward to tonight. What are we having for dinner?"

"Well the last time my mom cooked a meal was in 1997, so if there's no leftovers from then still in our fridge, I have no idea," Sam shrugged.

"Um…sounds good," Freddie cringed.

…

"You know," Sam said, coming into her kitchen later that evening, where her mom was stirring a pot on the stove. "It might help if you turn the stove _on_."

"Well these things are tricky," Pam defended.

"What are you even cooking?" Sam asked, afraid to hear the answer.

"Chili," Pam replied.

"Since when do you know how to cook _chili_?" Sam asked.

"Since now!" Pam snapped. "Now where's Benson? This stuff is almost ready."

"He's on his way," Sam replied. "He should be here any-"

The doorbell rang, cutting her off.

"There, he's here," Sam said. "Keep your pants on."

She hurried to the door and opened it up, finding Freddie at her front step, holding a bouquet of flowers.

"Aw, you bought me flowers?" Sam grinned as the two exchanged a quick kiss.

"No, these aren't for you," Freddie said. "They're for your _mom _as a thank you for having me over tonight."

"You've got to be kidding me," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Mmm, do I smell chili?" Freddie asked pleasantly, stepping into the house.

"Yeah, hopefully it doesn't kill us," Sam said darkly.

"Baby," Freddie sighed. "Can't you just try to have a positive attitude about tonight? Your mom's doing a nice thing here."

"Yeah, well, I've known my mom a _little _longer than you," Sam said. "Her nice things usually end pretty badly. Like when I was six, during the only teacher-parent night she ever came to, she wound up taking a nap on the mats in the back of the classroom and then tried to go out with the janitor. And when I was eight she decided it would be nice to take me to the movies. Only she _left _me there! For six hours! The only good part about that day was all the gummy bears people kept buying me because they felt sorry for me! Trust me, Freddie, she'll mess this up somehow."

"Give her a chance," Freddie said gently. "She's still trying now, isn't she?"

Sam didn't reply.

"Jeez, how long does it take to get the dang door?" Pam said, coming out of the kitchen. She slapped Freddie's back, causing him to loose his balance slightly. "Hey there, Muscle Boy."

"Um, hello Mrs. Puckett," Freddie said. He handed her the flowers. "Thanks for having me over."

"Wow, you should take a few pages out of his book on how to treat a mom, Sammy," Pam said, taking the flowers. "Come on, dinner's ready. I even broke out the good plastic bowls."

"See, she broke out the good plastic bowls," Freddie said to Sam. "It's going to be _fine_."

"We'll see," Sam mumbled.

….

As the three ate dinner, Sam kept waiting for her mother to somehow mess the evening up. Whether it would be her breaking out her razor and shaving her armpits at the table or her giving a vivid recollection of her latest wart removal, Sam was preparing herself for it.

But the humiliation never occurred. The entire meal, Pam Puckett was pleasant and well-behaved.

She asked Freddie about himself, about school, and what he planned to do when he graduated. She was genuinely trying to get to know Freddie better.

This was the hardest her mother had tried to get to know anything about something that was important to Sam.

"This pudding is amazing," Freddie said during desert.

"Fresh from the store," Pam replied. "So you were saying you're going to MIT next Fall? What's that, some sort of mall?"

"Um, no, it's a university," Freddie explained. "In Massachusetts."

"One of the best universities in the country," Sam added.

"Huh, guess you really are as smart as Sam says," Pam said approvingly.

"Aw, you brag about me to your mom?" Freddie said to Sam.

"Just eat your pudding, nub," Sam said.

"Isn't Massachusetts far away from here?" Pam asked. "Like around Florida?"

"Um, it's a _bit _north of Florida," Freddie explained.

"It's where Boston is," Sam replied. "You know, where you got arrested for trying to make that turkey-"

"Oh yeah…" Pam said thoughtfully. "I remember that."

"What did you do to that turkey?" Freddie whispered to Sam.

"If I told you, you'd probably puke up that pudding," Sam smirked.

…

That night, Sam took a deep breath before walking into her mom's bedroom.

"What's up, kid?" Pam asked, looking up from filing her toenails.

"I, um, just wanted to say, um, thanks for having Freddie over tonight," Sam said, looking at her feet. "I'm glad you got to know him a little better. Tonight was actually a lot of fun."

"Hey, how come you never told me Muscles was leaving to go across the country?" Pam asked.

"Oh, I-I dunno," Sam shrugged. "It never came up."

"Well you're still staying in Washington, aren't you?"

"Yeah, me and Carly already have our dorm picked out at Washington State, remember?" Sam said.

"Yeah, I remember," Pam nodded. She looked up at her daughter. "You gonna miss him?"

Sam frowned. "I-I guess…I-I haven't really thought about it too much…I figured I would deal with it when it happens."

Pam nodded. "Well, from what I could tell tonight, that boy loves you a lot. I know I'm no expert in relationships, but for what it's worth…I think you guys will last."

Sam smiled. "Thanks mom."


	449. Chapter 449

_Company_

"Come on, please?"

"No!"

"This will be the last time, I swear."

"We both know that's not true."

"Please? It's not that big a deal," Sam said.

"No," Freddie said firmly. "That's my final answer, Sam."

"Ugh!" Sam moaned, slumping down in her chair in the couple's history class. "Unbelievable! What kind of boyfriend doesn't let his girlfriend copy his homework?"

"The kind of boyfriend who's trying to teach his girlfriend the importance of taking responsibility for her own work," Freddie replied simply. "Especially since she's going off to college in a few months."

"Come on baby, if I don't turn in another homework assignment, I'm gonna fail for sure," Sam said. "Please, just this one last time? For me?"

"I-Fine," Freddie said, unable to resist those words. He thrust his worksheet over onto her desk. "But I'm serious, Sam. You're doing your own homework from now on!"

"Okay," Sam agreed, smiling triumphantly as she quickly jotted down the answers onto her own blank worksheet.

"I thought you and Carly were working on history homework last night anyway," Freddie said. "Why didn't you just do this _then_."

"We _were _gonna do homework," Sam said. "But then you called and asked if I wanted to come over."

"You could've told me _no_," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Yeah, but we wound up having a pretty good time, didn't we," Sam smirked. "Especially since your batty mom wasn't there."

"True," Freddie chuckled. "But next time, if you're actually about to do your homework, we can hold off the make-out session until you finish."

"Really? 'Cause your tongue was pretty anxious," Sam said, handing Freddie his homework back just as their teacher walked into the room.

"Shh!" Freddie hissed, his face reddening.

"Okay class," the teacher said just as the bell rang. "If everybody could pass up their homework, we'll begin our lecture on the Industrial Revolution. Now, who knows some of the direct consequences of-?"

"Excuse me, Mr. Peters?" Principal Franklin said, popping his head into the classroom all of the sudden. "Sorry to interrupt, but I need to speak to Mr. Benson."

"Can't it wait until after class?" Mr. Peters asked. "He's going to miss my thrilling lecture!"

"Unfortunately no, this can't wait," Principal Franklin.

Freddie, looking rather confused, slowly got out of his seat.

"Bring your things, Freddie," the principal said.

"You're in _trouble_," Sam said jokingly under her breath as Freddie gathered his books.

"How? I didn't do anything?" Freddie whispered back as he headed out of the classroom with Principal Franklin.

Once her boyfriend left, Mr. Peters cleared her throat and started up his lecture again.

Sam rested her head on her desk, feeling her eyelids begin to droop.

_Well, at least now I can get some sleep without Frednub waking me up and making me pay attention_, she figured.

….

"Can you believe I got a _B_ on my French project?" Carly exclaimed after the class period had ended, and her and Sam met by their lockers. "A B!"

"Hey, I'd love a B in French," Sam said, grabbing a Fat Cake from her locker.

"But I spent three straight weeks carefully constructing that model of the Eifel Tower out of toothpicks!" Carly said angrily. "You know how hard it was keeping that thing safe when I live with the biggest fire-hazard around?"

"Should've done what I did and just turned in a package of French cheese," Sam said. "I got a C and didn't have to do any work!"

"You know, it amazes me how well you'd actually do in school if you just _tried_," Carly said, rolling her eyes.  
"Save me the 'potential' speech, Carls," Sam said. "Freddie gives it to me once a week."

"Hey, where is Freddie anyway?" Sam asked. "Didn't you guys just have class together?"

"Yeah, but Franklin came and called him out right at the beginning," Sam said.

"How come?"

"I dunno," Sam shrugged. "He probably got some award for AV club or something."

"Oh, well then I guess he'll be in a good mood while we film iCarly all day," Carly said. "We're really behind. We need to get all our prerecorded stuff done today for the show tomorrow."

"Oh, I was supposed to pick up a litter box for that, wasn't I?" Sam frowned.  
"Sam!" Carly moaned.

"Well I was busy, I forgot!" Sam defended.

"Hey guys, did you know they finally put two-ply toilet paper in the men's room?" Gibby said, joining the two girls. "Finally! What kind of savages can survive with that single-ply stuff?"

"Hey Gib, you're bringing your cat's litter box to iCarly rehearsal today," Sam said.

"Yes!" Gibby cheered, throwing his hands in the air.

"See," Sam said to Carly. "Problem solved."

…

"Okay, what could Principal Franklin be doing with Freddie that made him disappear all day at school?" Carly asked later that day as the two girls walked down the hall to the Shay's apartment.

"I told you, I'm gonna chalk it up to aliens," Sam said simply.

"Aliens?" Carly repeated, amused. "Shouldn't you be a little more concerned if you think your boyfriend got abducted by aliens?"

"No, because how cool would it be to be the girlfriend of a guy who's been in an alien spaceship?" Sam grinned.

"Yes…that's every girl's dream," Carly chuckled as she unlocked her front door.

When they walked into the apartment, they were surprised to see Spencer sitting on the couch, as though he had been waiting for him.

"Hey," Carly said brightly, hanging up her jacket.

"Hey," Spencer replied heavily, getting to his feet.

Both girls were taken aback by the seriousness of his voice.

"What's up?" Carly frowned.

"I need to talk to you both," Spencer sighed.

"Why?" Sam asked.

"Today," Spencer started. "Today…Mrs. Benson died today, guys."

Carly gasped, covering her mouth with her hands, and Sam's eyes grew wide.

"No," Sam whispered.

_That's why Freddie was called out of class_, she realized.

"Oh my God," Carly said, tears forming in her eyes as Spencer put an arm around her. "What-What happened?"

"She got into a car accident on her way to the health foods store," Spencer explained. "Someone ran a red light and crashed right into her."

"Where's Freddie?" Sam asked at once.

"I think he's across the hall," Spencer replied. "I saw him come home right after I found out, and I tried to talk to him, but he ignored me and locked his door."

Sam didn't reply as she turned and ran out of the apartment. She knocked on Freddie's door.

"Freddie!" she said loudly, jiggling the doorknob to find it was indeed locked. "Freddie, it's me! Open up!"

But Freddie didn't come, so Sam quickly took her trusty bobby pin out of her pocket and picked the lock in record time.

Once she got the door open, Sam headed right to the back of the apartment to Freddie's room.

His door was open, and as she slowly stepped into the room, she saw him lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling.

His face was tearstained and she saw that the knuckles on his right hand were bleeding.

She saw a massive hole in the plaster of the wall right above his bed.

"Freddie?" she said gently, sitting down next to him. "I'm so sorry…"

Freddie gave her a small nod.

"Are you…How are you doing?" she asked.

Freddie shrugged. "How exactly am I supposed to be doing, Sam?"

Sam was momentarily stung by the coldness of his words, but she knew she couldn't even imagine the pain Freddie must feeling right now.

"Right…that was a stupid question," Sam said. She sighed, putting her arms around him. "I know you can't be doing too well…"

Freddie didn't reply.

"Let me see your hand," Sam said softly, taking his wounded hand. "We should probably get some ice on that."

"It's fine," Freddie said, snatching his hand away.

"I just-"

"Look, I get that you're trying to be the supportive girlfriend and all right now, but I don't really want company right now," Freddie said, not looking at Sam.

Sam blinked. "I-Okay," she nodded, slowly getting to her feet. "I understand…I guess I'll just leave you alone then. Call me, okay? When you think you're ready to talk. I really want to help you get through this."

She turned to leave, but before she made it out the door, Freddie sighed.

"No, don't go…I'm sorry."  
"Don't be sorry," Sam said. "You have a right to want to be alone right now."

"I-I don't want to be alone," Freddie mumbled. "Can you…stay with me? Please?"

"Of course," Sam said, returning to the bed, wrapping her arms around him. He rested his head on her shoulder, and Sam felt a few tears fall onto her skin.

The two stayed like this for several hours, neither saying a word.

Finally, once the sky had grown darker, Freddie spoke.

"I never even thought about this happening," he said quietly. "I mean, I knew it would eventually happen…I just figured she would be really old and I'd be older too, you know?"

Sam nodded.

"I just can't believe it happened so suddenly," Freddie said, his voice cracked and shaken. "She-She was here when I woke up this morning and when I left for school…she even texted me saying she was picking up an eggplant loaf for dinner."

"It shouldn't have happened like this," Sam told him. "Not now."

Freddie shook his head. "And-And the worst part is…I didn't even get to say goodbye."

Sam felt her own heart sink as fresh tears began flowing from Freddie's eyes. "I didn't even get to tell her I loved her, or-or that she was a good mom, or-or anything. You know what the last thing I said to her was?"

"Don't do this to yourself," Sam said, stroking his back. "Don't-"

"This morning she said she wanted me to stay in with her tonight and work on a new puzzle she picked up," Freddie told her. "And I said no way, because I'm too old for that stuff now and I didn't want to keep doing those stupid puzzle nights with her. _That's _the last thing I said to her. What kind of son am I?"

"She knew you didn't mean that," Sam said at once. "She knew how much you loved her."

She passed Freddie a tissue.

"I-I just wanted to say goodbye," Freddie said, wiping his face. "And now I'll never get to."

Sam didn't know what to say to comfort him, so she simply hugged him tightly and allowed him to continue to cry into her shoulder.

…..

Freddie fell asleep a little after midnight. Sam watched his chest fall and rise, wishing she could do something to make her boyfriend feel even the slightest bit better.

But she knew there was nothing she could do except be right here for him.

She slowly got off the bed and went into his bathroom, opening up the first aid kit that sat on the counter.

Sam felt a pang of sadness thinking about how well stocked Mrs. Benson had kept it.

Even though the two had had their disagreements, Sam knew she was going to miss the woman.

She grabbed a bandage and returned to the bed, tenderly wrapping Freddie's hand without waking him.

She then retreated into the kitchen, knowing it had been at least twelve hours since Freddie had eaten anything.

She opened the fridge, overwhelmed by all the odd-looking health foods that were housed in it. She didn't know how to cook any of those, so she simply grabbed a few eggs and headed to the stove.

Once she had a large plate made for Freddie, she set it on the table. She would wait until Freddie woke up and then warm it up again for him.

She didn't have to wait, though, for a few moments later, as she was cleaning the frying pan, Freddie shuffled out into the kitchen.

"I thought you were asleep," Sam said, taking his hand and leading him to the table where his eggs were waiting for him.

"I woke up," Freddie said simply.

"Eat these," Sam said, handing him a fork.

"Thanks," Freddie mumbled, putting a little bit in his mouth. "And, um, thanks for the bandage."

"No problem," Sam said sitting down next to him.

"You're not eating," Freddie commented.

"Don't worry about me," Sam told him.

She waited a few moments before opening her mouth.

"Do you know what's going to happen? I mean, you're not eighteen yet…they won't let you stay here without a parent."

"I know," Freddie said softly. "My-My dad's gonna come here. He's going to move in until we finish high school."

"Oh," Sam nodded, knowing that Freddie didn't have a close relationship with his father.

"He's supposed to be here tomorrow," Freddie said.

"Well…at least you won't have to move," Sam said, trying to think positively.

"I guess," Freddie said darkly.

Sam took his good hand. "Hey…I just wanted to tell you…I know your mom and I…we didn't exactly…we-we didn't see eye to eye. But I _will_ miss her. She was a good mom to you…and that's what I liked most about her. She really made you into a great guy."

Freddie gave her hand a small squeeze. "Thanks, Sam," he whispered. "I really needed to hear that."


	450. Chapter 450

_Hat_

Freddie struggled to keep his mind on whatever it was Ms. Briggs was lecturing about in his English class, knowing if he didn't start performing back up to his usual standards in her class, his title of valedictorian when he graduated next year was sure to be lost.

Yet the only thing he seemed able to focus on was the blonde in the desk in front of him.

He knew back when him and Sam began dating, more than three months ago, that he'd probably have some trouble concentrating with her in front of him, but what guy _could_ focus on grammar and short stories with his girlfriend mere inches away from him anyway?

Now that they had broken up, though, he was getting frustrated with himself that he continued to allow her to take over his mind for this one-hour period every.

Well, every hour, really. It wasn't as though Sam Puckett just magically left his mind after class. Thoughts of her circulated his head almost every waking minute.

Freddie let out a soft sigh, trying to listen to what was being said about some author and some 'turn-of-the-century-novel', but he knew it was hopeless.

Freddie knew there was no use denying the fact that the blonde in front of him still held his heart. From the second they decided they were going to break up two months and sixteen days ago in that elevator, he knew he didn't want to give her up.

But he did, because that was the best thing to do, right? They were so different and fought more than any couple should. Yet…they had said they'd try again some day. Freddie just wished that day would hurry up and get here.

Suddenly, Freddie noticed that Sam didn't seem to be paying attention to Ms. Briggs either, though that was hardly a surprise. What was a surprise, however, was that she was passing tiny slips of paper back and forth with the boy she was sitting next to.

Freddie turned his gaze towards this boy, Shawn Lawrence. He was the new kid, having transferred from some school in Kentucky a few weeks ago, but that's all Freddie really knew about him.

When Ms. Briggs looked away to write something on the board, Sam quickly turned in her seat to pass Shawn another note.

That's when Freddie caught sight of her face. Her cheeks were red, and she was giving Shawn her signature smirk, and her eyes were sparkling.

Shawn smiled back at her, quickly reading the note, and giving a quiet laugh before scribbling down his response.

_Her and I used to write notes,_ Freddie thought to himself sadly, still staring at Sam's beautiful expression. _And I'd pretend it annoyed me because I was trying to learn, but…but I loved it when we did that. _

He watched as Sam read Shawn's response, laughing almost loud enough to draw attention from Briggs, and Freddie's heart sank.

_Well she's not writing notes with you anymore_, Freddie told himself, begging his mind to block out what was happening in front of him. He might have clung on to those words in the elevator, the 'We'll try it again' and the 'I love you', but to Sam, those words seemed to have faded. _She's moved on_.

…..

"-And he skateboards! He was once in a commercial doing some fancy skate trick when he was a kid! How cool is that?" Sam said excitedly a few days later as her and Carly sat in Carly's bedroom. "And he has an autographed poster from the creator of _Girly Cow_!"

"Wow, this Shawn sounds pretty cool," Carly grinned.

"He is," Sam nodded.

"And it sounds like you really like him," Carly said knowingly.

Sam blushed slightly. "Yeah…That's what I wanted to tell you. He…He asked me to get coffee with him tomorrow!"

"What?" Carly exclaimed. "He asked you out?"

"For coffee," Sam repeated. "Nothing to get too crazy about."

"Please, everyone knows getting coffee is practically a first date," Carly said.

"Well…okay, it's a date," Sam smiled.

"Oh my God, Sam!" Carly squealed, throwing her arms around her best friend. "This is amazing! I'm so happy for you!"

"Thanks," Sam said, hugging Carly back.

"We have to figure out what you're gonna wear," Carly said. "I have this cute new top you can borrow! Oh, and you can wear those boots with the cool laces you have! Oh, and more importantly…when am I gonna meet this guy?"

Sam face suddenly fell. "I dunno…he goes to school with us, remember? Just…just find him there."

"Well why don't you have him pick you up for your date here?" Carly said. "That way you don't risk Frothy attacking him like he did to your mailman this morning."

"That mailman was asking for it," Sam mumbled. "But, um…I don't think having him come around here is the best idea."

"Why not?" Carly frowned. "You don't want me to meet him?"

"It's not you I don't want to meet him," Sam sighed. "It's…"

"Oh," Carly said, suddenly understanding. "You don't want him to run into Freddie."

"Yeah, it would just be weird, wouldn't it?" Sam nodded. "With us having dated and all."

"I-I guess it would be a little weird," Carly agreed.

"I mean, aren't you supposed to wait awhile before you start dating again if you stay friends with your ex?" Sam continued.

"I think you're supposed to wait until both people are over the break-up," Carly said. "Um, are-are you over the break-up?"

"I-I think so," Sam said slowly, though Carly noticed her best friend didn't meet her gaze.

"Well what about Freddie?" Carly asked. "Do you think he's over it?"

"I don't know," Sam sighed. "It's not like we talk about that…"

"Right," Carly nodded. "Well…you can't exactly cancel your date with Shawn anyway. But, well, I know you don't want to have Freddie meet Shawn, but maybe that's what would be best. Even if Freddie _isn't _over the break-up, I think he'd appreciate it more if you were honest and didn't hide this from him instead of sneaking behind his back."

"I guess…I guess that makes sense," Sam said thoughtfully. "I mean…Shawn is in the same English class as me and Freddie…he'd find out eventually. Maybe…Shawn has been wanting to come see us do iCarly, actually. Should I invite him over next time we do the show?"

"Yeah, that's a good idea," Carly agreed.

…..

A few days later, on the day the teens did their iCarly web show, Carly sat up in the studio, gluing feathers onto a hat that they would be using later that evening.

Just then the studio door opened and Freddie walked in carrying a large bag.

"Hey," Carly greeted him. "What's that?"

"The green screen for tonight," Freddie explained. "I figured I'd get it set up now."  
"Oh, okay," Carly nodded. She watched her friend begin to pull out several poles from the bag before taking a deep breath. "Hey, Freddie?"

"Yeah?" Freddie asked, looking up from the green screen. "What's up?"

"Um, I need to talk to you about something," Carly said, getting to her feet and approaching Freddie. "Something kind of important."  
"Is everything okay?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah," she nodded quickly. "It's just…I just wanted to let you know that-that Sam's bringing someone to watch the show tonight. A guy…who she has kind of gone out on a few dates with."

To Carly's surprise, this news didn't seem to shock Freddie. He just slowly nodded, as though he had been expecting this. "It's Shawn, isn't it?"

"You-You knew?"

"I figured it was only a matter of time," Freddie mumbled, stepping away from the screen and walking over to his tech cart. "I have English with them…"

"Oh," Carly said softly.

"So-So they've gone out now?" Freddie asked.

"Just for coffee," Carly replied. "And last night they went to the movies…"

_And they had their first kiss then too_, Carly added silently, remembering Sam's joyful phone call last night. But she didn't have the heart to tell Freddie that. Not after seeing his face right now.

"So-So are they like, officially dating now?" Freddie asked, not looking at Carly.

"I wouldn't say officially," Carly said.

"But they're getting there, right?"

"I-It looks that way, yeah," Carly said honestly, knowing how Freddie hated it when people tried to sugarcoat things for him.

"Right," Freddie said after a moment. "Well…okay then."

"If-If it helps, she was pretty nervous to bring him here tonight because she didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable," Carly told him. "She-She did think of you."

Freddie shrugged. "Okay."

Carly frowned. "Freddie? Are you-Are you okay with this? With Sam dating someone else?"

Freddie stared at her. "You want the honest answer?"  
Carly nodded.

"No, I'm not," Freddie told her heavily. "I-I don't know, I thought we were going to get back together. But, well, clearly she's moved on."

"Oh, Freddie," Carly said softly.

"But, well, I-I'm not the one who's dating this Shawn guy, so I don't have to be okay with it," Freddie said. "So…So if Sam wants to date him…That's her choice."

Carly squeezed his shoulder supportively. "You never know what's going to happen with this. Just because Sam's dating another guy doesn't mean she's gonna marry him or anything. For all we know, they might break up next week."

_But you don't see what she's like when she's around him_, Freddie thought to himself.

He knew Carly was only trying to make him feel better, though, so he nodded.

"Maybe."

…..

"Okay, so we'll do the pirate bit right after we show the fake movie trailer for _Captain Canada_," Carly said a few hours later, as Freddie made a few last minute adjustments with the green screen. "And then we can do the Random Dancing with Blueberries bit after-"

She was cut off as Sam walked into the studio, a tall, handsome boy at her heels. Their hands were intertwined, but Sam quickly let go once she stepped inside.

"Hi!" Carly said brightly. "You must be Shawn."

"Yeah," Shawn smiled politely, holding out a hand for Carly.

"Shawn this is my best friend, Carly," Sam introduced.

"Nice to finally meet you, I've heard a lot about you from Sam," Carly said.

"You too," Shawn replied.

"He's _cute_," Carly whispered to Sam. "Nice work!"

"Thanks," Sam grinned. She looked over at Freddie, who had stopped working on the green screen and was staring at her and Shawn. "Um…Shawn? This-This is Freddie. Freddie, um, this is Shawn."

"Hi," Shawn said, extending his hand to Freddie.

Freddie had told himself he was going to be okay with this. Whether he liked it or not, he was going to at least pretend he wasn't bothered by Sam dating this guy. But as he stared at the hand in front of him, he suddenly wanted to do nothing more than bat it away and slug Shawn in his perfectly straight nose.

But then he caught sight of Sam's face, looking at him, almost as if she was pleading him to do this for her.

And so, even though it was one of the hardest things he had ever done in his life, Freddie shook Shawn's hand. "Hi," he said back.

"You're in our English class, aren't you?" Shawn said.

"Um, yeah-yeah I am," Freddie replied.

"Guys, we need to start the show in a few seconds," Carly said, hoping to diffuse some of the tension that was in the room.

"Yeah, um, Shawn why don't you sit over there by the door?" Sam said.

"Sure," Shawn said brightly, stepping away from Freddie.

As Sam went in front of the camera with Carly, she looked back at Freddie, giving him a look that 'Thank you'.

…

"-And we're clear," Freddie said after the web show, setting his camera down.

"Sorry about your shirt," Carly said, looking at her best friend's paint-stained t-shirt. "I thought I had the lid of that paint jar screwed on."

"It's fine," Sam shrugged. "Can I borrow a new shirt, though?"

"Yeah, I think that steakhouse we're going to has a No Paint policy," Shawn chuckled.

"Yeah, come on, let's go find you something," Carly said, leading Sam out of the studio.

As the girls left, Freddie suddenly became painfully aware that him and Shawn were now left alone.

He looked over at the boy, feeling so much hatred and jealousy towards him. But then he thought back to how Sam looked when she was with him…

Freddie loved Sam. He knew there was no getting around that…But-But if you loved someone, weren't you supposed to do whatever you could to make them happy? Even if it meant sacrificing your own happiness at times?

So with all the strength he could muster, he walked over to Shawn.

"Hey, Shawn. I-I was wondering if I could have a word with you?"

"Look man," Shawn sighed. "I-I think I know what this is about."

"You-You do?" Freddie frowned.

"I heard around school that you and Sam used to, you know, date," Shawn said. "And I just wanted to let you know…I don't mean to make things awkward for you. Trust me, I know what it feels like to see your ex dating someone new. So-So I understand if you totally hate my guts right now."

_It would be a lot easier to hate him if he was a jerk_, Freddie thought. _But he just __**has **__to be a nice guy_.

"Right, well, um, that-that wasn't exactly what I wanted to tell you," Freddie said. He looked down at his feet. "Sam…Sam's not a normal girl. She's really complex. She-She seems really tough on the surface, but deep down she's really sensitive and _can _hurt. She-She also claims that she hates it when you call her beautiful or compliment her, but she really does love it. She also isn't exactly the most affectionate person in public, but just know that-that doesn't mean she doesn't care. And when you take her out…don't be stingy. She's really worth every penny. And she loves to laugh, so…so try and make her laugh as much as possible. Basically, what-what I'm saying is…take care of her, okay?"

Shawn smiled at him. "I will…don't worry."

"Hey, Shawn, you ready to go?" Sam asked, poking her head back into the studio, wearing a new, paint-free shirt.

"Yeah," Shawn said, giving Freddie a friendly wave. "See you in class tomorrow."

Sam gave him a small smile. "Bye nub," she said softly before turning and following Shawn.

Freddie let out a sad sigh as he leaned against his tech cart.

"Do all the things I should've done with her, Shawn," he said to himself. "When she was mine."


	451. Chapter 451

_Finance_

"Okay," Freddie said tiredly one evening as him and Sam sat at their kitchen table in front of his laptop, going through the family's finances. "If we move another five hundred into each of the kid's college funds…that puts our savings _here_…but then we have to take out for our bills this month, and then we have to pay for the oil changes for both our cars and for the window Tyler broke playing football in the yard, which _really _puts our savings…_here_? That can't be right."

"What?" Sam yawned.

"Our savings is a lot lower than it should be," Freddie frowned. "There must be some mistake. Let me look at our credit card statements again."

"Can't we just do this tomorrow?" Sam moaned. "It's late and I'm exhausted!"

"It's not like you're helping," Freddie mumbled under his breath as he scrolled through the statements. "Ah-ha! I found the problem. Why is there this huge charge from some ticket website?"

"Oh, last week while you were on that business trip, I took the kids to an MMA fight," Sam said.

"What? Sam, the tickets for that match were like, quadruple the normal price!" Freddie pointed out. "Why would you think it was okay to spend that kind of money?"

"It's no big deal, I wanted to have some fun with them," Sam shrugged. "We still have plenty in our savings."

"But what if there's some kind of emergency and we _need _that money you spent on those tickets?" Freddie said. "You know I worked really hard after Tyler was born to draw up a budget for us to make sure we were always financially set!"

"And we're still fine with our money," Sam said. "We'll just spend a little less this month or something, it's not that big of a deal."

"It is a big deal," Freddie said. "I mean this isn't the first time you've done this, Sam."

"What are you talking about?"

"I mean you always go and do this!" Freddie said. "You spend money and don't ever think about our savings. Last month you made us go over our budget and the month before that you did too! And probably the month before _that_!"

"Last month the only reason we went over was because I had to bail my mom out of jail," Sam said, narrowing her eyes. "Sorry for not letting my mom rot in a cell just to stay inside your precious budget."

"But we would've been fine even with paying that bail fee if you hadn't gone and spent all that money on yours stupid novelty catalogue!" Freddie snapped. "I swear…it's like you just _look _for ways to waste my money."

Sam raised an eyebrow. "_Your _money? I have a job too! I make money for us too!"

"You only work part-time," Freddie mumbled. "From home. I'm the one busting my butt everyday at work."

"Well you know what? I don't have a choice but to work from home part-time because I'm the one who looks after the kids all day!" Sam hissed. "I drive them everywhere, make sure their homework gets done, I cook for them and _you_! You think it's easy even _trying _to work from home when you have a four-year old hanging on your arm all day long?"

"Sam, all I'm saying is that-"

"I know what you're saying," Sam said darkly. "You think you do more around here so you should get to control all our money. You think I just sit around all day watching T.V. and stuffing my face with junk food figuring out how much of _your _money I can spend."

"That's not what I said," Freddie frowned. "You're putting words in my mouth."

"No I'm not," Sam said, getting to her feet. "You came in loud and clear."

…..

That night Freddie slept down on the sofa, knowing Sam was probably still fuming up in their bedroom.

When he woke up the next morning and went into the kitchen, the kids and Sam were already awake. Sam was at the stove making breakfast, and she didn't even look over at Freddie.

"Morning, daddy!" Ashton said brightly. "How come you were sleeping on the couch?"

"I, um, fell asleep watching T.V.," Freddie lied, not wanting to alarm his eight-year old with his and Sam's fight.

"Guys come on, you're gonna be late for school," Sam said, handing the kids their lunches. "And wouldn't be a shame if I failed at the one easy job I do and got you there after bell," she added under her breath so only Freddie heard her.

"Sam," Freddie sighed. "Can we-"

"You should go or you'll be late too," Sam said. "And wouldn't that be the end of the world? You know, since you're the glue that holds this family together."

Freddie sighed as Sam and the kids left.

_She's overreacting_, Freddie thought to himself. _All I said last night was that she needs to watch what she spends. I mean she would be pissed if it was the other way around and I was the one spending all her money._

And then suddenly, Freddie heard himself.

"I-I guess…I guess I did sort of imply that I thought I was more important than her," Freddie said slowly. "Because I make more money than her…But-But she…she. Ugh, she's right. I acted like a total jerk last night, making it seem like she has it so easy."

Truthfully, he knew how hard it must be to stay with the kids all day long. He loved his four children more than anything in the world, but they could be nightmares sometimes! Jason constantly destroyed parts of his room entertaining himself with his own science experiments, the twins could argue back forth with each other for _hours _and Tyler didn't seem to know the meaning of the words 'sit still'. Freddie didn't doubt that if they were to really tally their hours of labor per week that Sam would trump him by far.

He shook his heads. He really wished he hadn't said what he did to Sam last night. He didn't think he was any better than her, and he hoped she realized that he only said what he did out of the heat of the moment.

…

"Okay Tyler," Sam said, walking into the kitchen later that afternoon with the four-year old in her arms. "Since I can't leave you alone without you getting into something, you're just gonna have to sit in here with me while I work. Got it?"

"Mommy, I'm bored," Tyler moaned as Sam set him in a chair at the table, where she had her computer set up.

"Well you should've thought of that before you decided to scribble all over the wall!" Sam said.

"I'm hungry!"

"I'll make you lunch in a little while," Sam said, typing away at her computer, knowing if she didn't get her script edits in by the end of the day her boss would kill her. "Just please _sit _while mommy finishes this up."

Suddenly she heard the back door open and Freddie walked in, carrying a bouquet of flowers.

"Hi daddy!" Tyler said as Sam simply pursed her lips. "Play with me!"

"I can't right now, Ty, daddy has to get back to work soon," Freddie said, rustling his son's hair. "I just wanted to talk to mommy. Can you go watch T.V. for a little bit?"

Freddie waited until Tyler ran out of the room before her handed the flowers to Sam. "I, um, got you these."

"You sure we can afford those?" Sam asked coldly. "After all, I'm constantly screwing up the budget."

"Sam, I'm sorry," Freddie sighed.

"Sure you are."

"I was wrong to say that you-you waste all my money," Freddie said. "We're married. There's no 'my money' or 'your money'. It's 'ours'. And-And even if I made a million dollars more than you do, I-I don't want you to ever think you're not as important as I am. Heck if it wasn't for you, I couldn't do anything! You take care of the kids all day, _plus_ work, plus you do everything around the house…I'd never be able to do all that."

"No," Sam mumbled. "You probably wouldn't…"

"I-I just wanted to let you know, that…I didn't really mean those things I said last night," Freddie continued. "You know I'd never think I was better than you. I just…said it."

Sam shrugged. "Whatever, let's just forget about it, okay?"

"No, I don't want to forget about it until you know how valuable I really do think you are," Freddie said. He pulled out his Pearpad. "So today at work I made a little chart…"

"A chart?" Sam scoffed. "What's a chart got to do with anything?"

"Just listen," Freddie said quickly, pulling up a bar graph. "Okay, you see this blue bar? That's me. It shows how much I make."

"Yes, I get it, you make more than me," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Maybe according to our paychecks," Freddie explained. "But here, look at this red bar…that's you. If we add up what you make from working part time, what you _would_ make if you were paid for childcare if you worked for a daycare service times four kids, _plus _you would make if you were paid for housekeeping, you would out-earn me by a long shot!"

Sam stared at the graph. "Wow," she said softly.

"You see?" Freddie said. "Sam, without you, this place would fall apart."

Sam gave him a small smile. "Yeah…it kind of would, wouldn't it?"

"Totally," Freddie agreed. "Now do you see? I-I _know_ I'm not more important than you. The whole point of a marriage is to go through our life _together_, not worrying about if one of us is doing more than the other."

Sam nodded. "Yeah…I-I guess that _was _somewhere in our wedding vows."

"But, um, maybe I can start to ease up on our budget," Freddie said. "We're fine with our finances. It wouldn't kill me to be a little bit more flexible."

"And-And maybe I could try and cut back on what I order online from those stupid novelty stores," Sam said slowly. "I mean, I guess it wouldn't hurt to have a little extra cash to put away for the kids' college funds."

"We'll _both _work on those things," Freddie said. "Deal?"

"Deal," Sam nodded.

"So…are we good?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah," Sam smirked, finally taking the flowers from Freddie. "We're good."


	452. Chapter 452

_Maximum_

"I can't believe this! It's like the world hates me!"

"Emma, you're being dramatic," Sam said, rolling her eyes as her and Freddie helped their daughter into her bed. "You have a sprained ankle, not the plague."

"Yeah honey, you just need to rest for a few days," Freddie said. "I figured you'd be pretty pumped about getting to stay in bed; it's usually a giant battle to get you up."

"But it's the middle of track season!" Emma moaned. "I'm gonna miss the big race next week!"

"The doctor said you should be fine by then, as long as you stay off your feet," Sam told her. "So don't move around and you'll still get to compete."

"This is all stupid Ashton's fault," Emma mumbled. "I tripped over _her _shoe. This is why I need my own room! I can't live with all her junk in here!"

"You have just as much junk in this room as she does," Freddie said.

"Well my junk hasn't almost killed her!" Emma exclaimed. "Yet…"

"Okay, just relax, don't plot to kill your sister," Sam said. "Your dad and I will be downstairs, so if you need anything, all you have to do is yell and we'll come up here and-"

Just then there was a knock at the bedroom door and Sam and Freddie turned around to see Quincy standing in the doorway.

"Ashton let me up," Quincy told them as he stepped into the room. "I came over to see how she's doing."

"My ankle feels like it's gonna fall off," Emma said, crossing her arms.

"She's real peachy," Sam said, her voice dripping in sarcasm. She turned back to Freddie. "Well, if Quincy's up here, we're off the clock for a few hours. Let's go downstairs and watch T.V. or something before we have to start running up here every ten minutes."

"Okay," Freddie agreed. Before he left the room, though, he turned back to the two teens.

"This door stays _open_. Got it?"

"Got it," Quincy said quickly.

Once Sam and Freddie left he sat down next to Emma. "So it really hurts?"

"What do you think?" Emma snapped. "It's sprained!"

"Well, lucky for you, I brought you some stuff to take your mind off of the pain," Quincy said brightly, ignoring his girlfriend's tone. "I have season 2 of _Stupid Mall Cop Accidents_ on DVD, a giant bag of Fudge Rocks, a few cans of that iced tea you like and this funny looking magazine I saw at the store that rates the most awkward looking clowns from around the country."

Emma's expression lightened. "Wow…you really know your stuff."

"You think I don't know you well enough to know what would make you feel better?" Quincy grinned, leaning down to give her a quick kiss. "Wanna watch that DVD now?"

"Later," Emma said, moving over on her bed. "Just…lay here with me."

"Um," Quincy frowned, looking over his shoulder at the open door. "Your dad will _murder _me."

"We're just laying together, moron," Emma said, rolling her eyes. "What happened to all that stuff you said about wanting me to be more 'romantic'? This is as much romance and mushy junk as you're gonna get out of me!"

"Fine, but if your dad kills me, I'm blaming you," Quincy said, laying down next to her, putting his arm around her. "So Ashton told me the doctor said you only need to stay off your ankle for a maximum of three or four days. That's good news right."

"I still might have to miss my track meet next week," Emma said miserably. "It's gonna take awhile for me to get back up to where I was…"

"Well then you still have more meets," Quincy shrugged. "It won't do you any harm to miss one. Everyone needs a break every now and then anyway."

"No, I really needed to run at _this _meet," Emma sighed.

"Why?" Quincy asked.

"Because," Emma mumbled. "I-Okay, I didn't want to say anything, but…my coach told me that there were a few college scouts coming to this meet to watch me run. If-If they liked me they might've offered me a scholarship for next year."

"Whoa, Emma! That's huge!" Quincy grinned.

"I know it's huge! And that's why I didn't want to say anything," Emma said. "Especially not to my parents. They'd freak out and that would just wind up freaking me out, and-and if I didn't wind up getting any scholarships or anything, they'd be disappointed."

"I'm sure they wouldn't," Quincy said.

"Yeah they would," Emma said heavily. "I mean…they pretty much already know I'm not gonna wind up being as successful as Ashton after high school. She gets better grades, she does all these clubs…sports was the one thing I had over her. And if I can't even make that work…what do I have?"

"You have a lot," Quincy said at once. "You're funny, you're brave, you're-"

"None of that stuff's gonna do me any good when I'm trying to get into college," Emma pointed out. "Face it. If I can't I can't get this track scholarship, I'm doomed."

"You're not doomed," Quincy said firmly. "You're only doomed if you keep thinking like that. Look, even if you don't get to run next week, there will be other scouts. You're one of the best runners in the state, probably the country. Do you really think you're only going to attract a _few _scouts. Trust me, you'll have offers coming out your ears. But even without track, you could still get yourself into college or do whatever else you wanted with your life. You're one of the most driven, determined people I know. If you want to do something, you're _going _to do it."

Emma looked up at him. "You really think that? You actually think I could get into college without sports if I had to?"

"Absolutely," Quincy nodded. "As long as you tell yourself you're gonna do it."

Emma looked down at her lap. "Well…thanks. No one's ever told me that before."

Quincy smiled at her, giving her another kiss.

"Hey," Emma whispered, grinning as they pulled apart. "I think my dad's gonna be downstairs for awhile…wanna close the door?"

"Okay," Quincy agreed, getting up and walking across the door to very quietly close the door.

The second the door shut, though, they heard Freddie's voice all the way from downstairs.

"I said that door stayed _open!_ Don't make me come up there!"

"How did he _do _that?" Quincy asked, amazed as he quickly opened the door.

"Who knows," Emma sighed.


	453. Chapter 453

_Syndrome_

"I wish you were coming with me," Sam said as she closed her suitcase.

"So do I," Freddie nodded. "But I couldn't get off of work. I really tried, though, baby."

"I know you did," Sam said, giving him a small smile as she sat down on their bed next to him. "But I'm only gonna be gone two days."

"I'll still miss you," Freddie smirked, wrapping his arms around his wife. "Why'd your mom have to get arrested all the way in Vermont?"

"I dunno, I think she's really trying to say she's been arrested in all fifty states," Sam sighed. "I bet the next place we get a phone call from is Alaska."

"Well have fun," Freddie said. "Try and keep your mom from trying to marry another prison officer again."

"I'll do my best," Sam chuckled. "So what are you gonna do here? You have the place to yourself."

"I dunno, I guess I'll relax, maybe have a _Galaxy Wars _marathon," Freddie said.

"Gross," Sam cringed. "Yeah, you should do that while you have the chance, because we maybe be married now, but there's still no chance that's happening while _I'm _around."

"What time's your flight again?" Freddie asked, rolling his eyes.

"Six," Sam replied. "Which means I need to be at the airport in two hours."

"Two hours…" Freddie said thoughtfully. "Well, since you _are _gonna be gone for two days, maybe we should use this time to, you know, get a few things off our chest."

"Hmm, maybe," Sam grinned, leaning up to kiss him. "You know…I'm _really _gonna miss you."

"Tell me about it," Freddie said, holding his wife tightly as he continued to kiss her passionately.

…..

"Alright," Freddie said to himself a few hours later as he walked back into the Benson home after dropping Sam off at the airport. "Time to get this _Galaxy Wars _marathon underway. Hey…you know, I could order a pizza right now and actually get to eat some. You know what? This might not be as bad as I expected."

So Freddie sat down on the couch, put his feet on the coffee table, ordered himself a pineapple pizza, a delicacy that Sam wouldn't even let cross the threshold of the house, and grabbed the remote to begin a relaxing night of Proton Cruisers and Sky Nauts.

A little after midnight, though, just after he finished his third movie and ate the last slice of pizza, Freddie felt his eyelids growing heavy, and knowing he needed to be at work early the next morning, he decided to call it a night.

He headed up to his bedroom, kicked off his shoes and slid into bed.

The second his head hit the pillow, though, he realized how big and empty the bed suddenly felt with only one person in it.

He let out a small sigh as he turned to his side. Even though it had been nice to have some time to himself to relax and unwind, he was starting to really miss his wife. It felt strange not to exchange their normal good night kiss and drift off to sleep with her in his arms.

Him and Sam had been married for six months, and before that, they had lived with each other for over a year.

_Wow, _Freddie thought to himself as he stared off into the darkness. _This is the first night we've been apart in almost two years_.

Freddie closed his eyes shut, trying to block out this foreign feeling to get some sleep, but it seemed almost as if he had developed insomnia.

He sat up, fluffed his pillow and laid back down, but that did absolutely nothing.

"Come on," Freddie sighed. "I have to be up in six hours. I never have trouble falling asleep!"

He turned the lights back on and grabbed his Pearpad. Maybe messing around with a few apps would tire him out.

But even after several games of _Sugar Slam_, Freddie still felt wide awake.

He opened his drawer and pulled out the thick book on the dangers of dryer lint his mother had dropped off a few weeks ago after she claimed Sam was trying to kill him with her laundry skills that were apparently 'subpar'. But even after a chapter of that, Freddie didn't feel any sleepier, and he suddenly had a desire to never step foot in the laundry room again for fear of getting something called _Dryer's Death Syndrome. _

_This is ridiculous_, Freddie thought angrily. _I just want to sleep! Is that that too much to ask?_

He looked over at Sam's side of the bed, and he knew that if she was laying there with him, he'd have been fast asleep hours ago.

_Am I really some pathetic nub that can't fall asleep without his wife next to him? _Freddie thought, shaking his head as he checked the time, seeing that it was after four in the morning now. He sighed. _Looks like it._

…..

"Sam!"

"Hey!" Sam beamed as she stepped off her plane, running over to her husband and embracing him.

The couple shared a long kiss, each clearly missing the other's lips.

"Where's your mom?" Freddie asked, looking around for his eccentric mother-in-law. "Didn't you bail her out?"

"Yeah," Sam sighed. "But then we went out for breakfast this morning and she wound up hitting it off with the waiter, so she's staying in Vermont a little longer. You know, until that waiter realizes what he got himself into and runs like the rest of them. So how was your weekend? You like having the house to yourself?"

"It was…alright," Freddie said. "It was sort of lonely though. How was Vermont? Other than watching your mother chase down her newest guy, that is."

"Kind of boring," she admitted. "But I got a bunch of maple candy, at least. I'm ready to be back home, though."  
"Good," Freddie smiled, kissing her again. "And next time your mom needs to be bailed out of jail, I say we get Melanie to do it."

"I like the way you think," Sam grinned.


	454. Chapter 454

**AN-So this is sort of a prequel to chapter 445, where Freddie finds out Emma is on birth control.**

…**.**

_Contraception_

"How does Fredwad's stuff take up this much of our closet?" Sam mumbled, pushing her husband's clothes away from her half of their closet as she hung up some of her own clothes. "He's a boy! He has like, two shirts!"

She kicked a pair of his shoes out of the way. "I swear, he can't complain about my clothes being all over the floor when he takes up the whole dang closet!"

"Um, mom?"

Sam turned around to see her seventeen-year old daughter standing in her doorway.

"Oh, hey Emma," Sam said. "What's up?"

"Are you busy?" Emma asked.

"Nah, just cursing out your dad for claiming our closet as his," Sam said. "What do you need?"

"Um, could-could I talk to you?" Emma mumbled, her face red.

Sam frowned. "Sure," she said, sitting down on her bed and nodding for Emma to join her. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah…I guess," Emma sighed. "Um…well…"

"What is it, sweetie?" Sam asked, concerned. Emma was never one to have trouble saying what she wanted.

"I was wondering if, um, maybe…maybe I could…could I start…" and them Emma mumbled something under her breath that Sam couldn't make out.

"What?" Sam asked. "I didn't hear you."

Emma took a deep breath. "Can I start taking birth control?"

Sam's eyes widened. "Um…_what_?"

"Never mind," Emma said quickly. "Forget I-"

"No, come on," Sam said, holding her daughter's arm to keep her from leaving the room. "Why do you want to be on birth control? You-You and Quincy aren't…_doing _anything yet, are you?"

"I-No," Emma said slowly. "But, um, lately…lately I've kind of been thinking about it…"

_Aw jeez_, Sam thought to herself. She wasn't as overprotective of the girls as Freddie was, but it was still hard for her to think about her little girl in such an adult situation.

"Um, well…alright," Sam said, feeling a bit awkward, but knowing Emma must've felt ten times more embarrassed at that moment. "Um, it's good that you came to me…but you know that just because you and Quincy have been dating for awhile-"

"Two years," Emma corrected.

"Right…just because you and Quincy have been dating for two years, doesn't mean you _have _to…take this step," Sam said seriously. "Now, I'm not an idiot. I know if I just tell you right now that you aren't allowed to do anything more than kiss Quincy, you'll just do it behind my back. But I just want to let you know that this is something that _both _of you need to be completely ready for. It's a huge step to take."

"I know that," Emma said.

"Good," Sam said. "So, um, is this something you've discussed with Quincy?"

"No," Emma sighed.

"Well you _do _need to talk to him before you do anything," Sam said.

"I know," Emma mumbled. "I just wanted to be ready…in case we do decide we want to…you know."

Sam nodded. "Well…I guess that's very responsible of you. But like I said, whatever happens…I just want you to make sure you're ready. I mean, do _you _think you're ready for this, Emma?"

"I-I'm not entirely sure," Emma admitted. "I really love him…like _a lot_. And sometimes when I think about, um, doing that stuff with him, I feel ready, but then sometimes I get kind of nervous. You think I would be more sure after I talk to him?"

"Probably," Sam nodded. "But…seriously, promise me that you're going to be one hundred percent comfortable with any decision you make, Emma. Because if you wind up doing something, you know you can't go back and undo it. There's nothing wrong with waiting if you feel that's what's best for you."

"Okay," Emma said earnestly. "I promise."

"And with the birth control," Sam continued. "You do know it's not one hundred percent effective? It's important to use, obviously, but it's not indestructible. Just keep that in mind."

"I will," Emma said. "So, um, can-can I start taking it?"

Sam let out a soft sigh. "Yes. I'll take you in to the doctor's tomorrow and we can get you a prescription."

Emma smiled. "Thanks, mom."

Sam held out an arm for her. "Come here, kid."

She hugged her daughter tightly. "You grew up too fast…you know that?" she whispered.

Once Emma left, Sam stayed sitting in her spot, thinking about the conversation she had just had. She really was glad Emma chose to talk to her about this. She knew Emma never liked to bring up personal subjects, something she had no doubt picked up from her. Sam had never had any of these talks with her own mother. She remembered back when her and Freddie were dating and she was in the same position Emma was in right now, she had to go to some clinic on her own to get birth control.

And as much as she would love to keep her kids young and innocent forever, she knew that was completely out of the question.

_You did the right thing_, Sam told herself. _At least now…at least now you know she'll be safe if she decides to do anything. And-And it's not like she's thinking about doing this with a guy she's been with for a week. Her and Quincy __**have **__been together for two years…I guess I should've seen this coming awhile ago. _

Still, though, there was one thing Sam knew for certain; there was no way she was going to be telling Freddie about this.


	455. Chapter 455

_Congestion_

"Okay, I made you a batch of my world famous soup to help get this flu out of you," Carly said brightly, coming into Sam's bedroom with a tray in her arms.

"Oh…thanks, Carls," Sam said, pulling on a smile as she tried not to gag on the stench of the soup. "Looks great."

"Have you taken your medicine yet?" Carly asked, looking over at the bottle on Sam's bedside table.

"No, and I'm not gonna," Sam said firmly. "That stuff tastes disgusting!"

"Well then you're never going to get any better!" Carly said, rolling her eyes. "My special soup can only help you so much."

"I'm not putting any of that medicine junk down my throat," Sam said, crossing her arms stubbornly.

"You're acting like a child," Carly said. "You're twenty years old! Just take the dang medicine!"

"No!"  
"Sam, you have to!"

"No I don't!"

"Yes you do!"

"What is going on?" Freddie asked, walking into his and Sam's shared bedroom.

"Carly's trying to kill me with medicine," Sam mumbled.

"You mean you haven't taken any medicine yet?" Freddie frowned. "Baby, you have to or you won't get better!"

"That's exactly what I said!" Carly nodded. "Maybe _you'll _have better luck. She's _your_ girlfriend, after all."

"I'll try my best," Freddie chuckled.

"Feel better, Sam, and _take your medicine_!" Carly said. "I have to go work on my paper for my anthropology class, but I'll swing by later."

Freddie sat down on the couple's bed next to Sam, kissing her gently. He pressed a hand to her forehead. "You're still really warm. You feeling any better?"

"No," Sam mumbled. "I still feel like butt…The only good part was that I got to skip all my classes today."

"Well you should still be keeping up with your readings and the rest of your work," Freddie said. "Did you email your professors and explain that you're sick?"

"Don't start this lecture again," Sam moaned, grabbing a tissue and blowing her nose in it. "I feel sick enough."

"Then you need to take this stuff," Freddie said, picking up the medicine bottle. "Look, it says here it reduces fever, coughing, chest and sinus congestion and nausea. It's just what you need!"

"But it's so icky!" Sam groaned.

"Tell you what," Freddie said. "If you take this medicine, I'll go replace Carly's soup with my own special soup-from-the-can so you can actually keep it down."

Sam pursed her lips. She _was _hungry, and as much as she loved her best friend, she knew that soup would probably make her even sicker.

"Fine," Sam finally agreed.

"Thank you, Princess Puckett," Freddie smiled triumphantly, pouring the medicine and handing it to Sam. "Drink up."

Sam glared at him as she drank the medicine, almost gagging as she finished.

"There, now you'll see, you're gonna start to feel a lot better," Freddie assured her.

"Just go get me my soup," Sam snapped.

…..

Later that evening, the couple was still sitting in their bed. Sam was watching T.V. and Freddie was flipping through one of his textbooks.

Sam yawned and turned off the T.V.

"You going to sleep?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah, that medicine really made me drowsy," Sam nodded, giving a few coughs. "I hate being sick."

"I know," Freddie said, closing his book and putting an arm around her, kissing her deeply.

Sam responded at once, but after a few seconds, she pulled away quickly.

"What's wrong?" Freddie frowned.

"Nothing," Sam said. "But we should probably try and take a break from swapping spit…I don't want you to get sick."

"Baby, don't worry about me," Freddie chuckled. "You know I have a great immune system. I grew up in a house full of sterilizers and tick baths; I don't get sick!"

"I dunno, this is supposed to be pretty contagious," Sam said.

"Sam, I'll be fine," Freddie told her. "Besides, I'd rather get some dumb old flu than stay away from you any day."  
Sam smiled, her cheeks flushing. "Okay…come here, you nub."

…..

The next morning, Sam woke up feeling just as awful as she did yesterday.

_Stupid medicine didn't even do a dang thing_, Sam thought miserable, pulling her covers tighter to her body to try and block out the chills that were running through her.

_Looks like I at least get another day in bed_, Sam thought, wishing the aches in her body would begin to subside even a little.

Suddenly, just as she closed her eyes to try and drift off to sleep, she heard a loud fit of coughing from next to her.

She sat up and frowned, looking down at her boyfriend slowly beginning to stir.

"Ugh, I feel like I got hit by a bus," Freddie moaned, clutching his head.

"You okay?" Sam asked.

"Not really…I feel-I feel-"

"You're _sick_," Sam said, shaking her head. "Guess your amazing immune system met its match."

"Aw man!" Freddie moaned, falling back on his pillow. "I don't get sick!"

"Well, someone should've told your body that, 'cause trust me, Fredward, you _look_ sick," Sam smirked.

"Thanks," Freddie mumbled. "I can't believe this…I really needed to be in my programming class today! We were going over material for our exam next week!"

"I told you I was gonna get you sick," Sam said. She squeezed his hand. "I'm sorry, baby."

"It's not your fault…" Freddie sighed. "You _did _warn me."

"Yeah, but you're still sick now," Sam pointed out. "And I can't even take care of you like you did for me yesterday because _I'm _still sick."

"Well, then it looks like we're both just stuck in this bed then," Freddie smiled. "We'll have to take care of each other as best we can."

"Okay," Sam agreed. "I _guess _I can make it out the kitchen to grab us something for breakfast."

"I'll go grab us some more blankets too," Freddie said. "Because _somebody_ is hogging all of them right now."

"Get used to it, Fredrag," Sam said, pulling herself out of bed.

As she headed into the kitchen, Freddie couldn't help but smile to himself in spite of the sickly feeling that had taken over his body.

He supposed if he was going to have to spend the day sick in bed, having Sam right here with him would be the best way to do it.


	456. Chapter 456

_Installing_

"Ugh, this is the second week in a row we're not gonna be able to do iCarly because of that dumb virus some moron sent us!" Carly moaned as her, Sam and Freddie sat up in the iCarly studio.

"Yeah, haven't you figured out the problem yet, Fredbag?" Sam snapped. "What kind of computer nerd are you?"

"I'm working on it," Freddie said, typing away furiously at his laptop. "This virus is really complex…I've never seen anything like it."  
"Well stop ogling over it and get rid of it!" Sam hissed.

"I just said I'm _working _on it!" Freddie snapped. "I'd like to see _you _try and fix this."

"Guys, don't fight," Carly sighed. "Sam, Freddie's working as fast as he can. Freddie…work faster."

"I'm gonna try installing some new software I got from the AV club and see if that will do anything," Freddie said.

"Well when will _that _be done?" Sam asked.

"Probably four to six hours," Freddie answered.

"Unbelievable," Sam said, shaking her head. "The one thing you're supposed to be good at…"

"Freddie will get this solved," Carly said to Sam.

"Thank you, _Carly_," Freddie said, glaring at Sam.

"In the meantime, let's get out of his hair and go to the mall," Carly said to her best friend.

"I don't want to go to the mall," Sam said.

"Well then you can stay here and watch Freddie install his stuff," Carly shrugged.

"Fine, fine, I'll go," Sam conceded. She turned back to Freddie. "See what you've done, nub. Now I'm gonna have to spend five hours looking at shoes!"

"Have fun," Freddie smirked.

….

"We're back!" Carly announced later that afternoon as her and Sam returned to the Shay's apartment.

Freddie was sitting at the counter, still working on his laptop.

"Did you figure the virus out yet?" Sam asked impatiently, heading into the kitchen.

"No," Freddie sighed. "The software I installed was blocked by it. But I do have a bit of good news."

"What?" Carly asked.

"Well, I've been chatting with the guy who _sent _the virus," Freddie said. "And-"

"Wait, _what_?" Sam frowned. "You're _talking _to this guy?"

"After the software failed, I got a chat request from someone," Freddie explained. "And I opened it up and it turned out to be the virus's creator."

"Well what does he _want_?" Carly demanded. "Did you tell him to give us our web show back?"

"Yeah, but he's playing hardball here," Freddie said. "I'm trying to work something out with him right now."

"Tell him he better fix our website or I'll come find him and rearrange his face!" Sam yelled.

"That's just gonna make him stop talking to me," Freddie said. "I think I can get through to this guy…Us computer fanatics-"

"Nerds," Sam corrected.

"Us computer _fanatics_," Freddie said firmly, giving her a look. "Have a professional soft spot for each other. I'm sure if I just keep talking with him, he'll fix the website in no time."

"Just be careful," Carly told him. "Some of those Internet guys are pretty weird."

"Yeah, here's a prime example," Sam said, nodding over at Freddie.

….

As the day went on, Freddie continued to talk to the virus creator online.

"You still haven't made any progress convincing this guy to give us our website back?" Carly yawned, turning off the movie her and Sam had been watching.

"No," Freddie said. "But tomorrow everything should be fixed. Turns out this guy is from Seattle too. He wants to meet with me to have this conversation face-to-face."

"What?" Sam and Carly both exclaimed.

"Yeah, I'm gonna meet him tomorrow at that diner near the movie theatre," Freddie nodded.

"Freddie, you can't just meet some strange Internet dude!" Carly said. "Are you _insane_?"

"Well do you want our webpage back or not?" Freddie pointed out. "Look, this guy seems reasonable-"

"What reasonable guy sends a computer virus to a teen webpage in the first place?" Sam said.

"Yeah Freddie, I don't like the sound of this," Carly frowned.

"Come on, Carls, don't worry about this," Freddie said. "Look, we're meeting at a _public _place. Besides, I'll be the first to admit that that guys who can craft viruses this strong aren't exactly the most intimidating or threatening. I'll meet with him, maybe share an onion ring basket, and then get him to give us our webpage back."

"At least have me and Sam come with you," Carly said.

"No, I told you, I'll be _fine_," Freddie assured her. "And by this time tomorrow I'll have our webpage back up and running smooth as a-"

"You can't just meet some freak from the Internet all by yourself!" Sam spoke up loudly. "Are you _trying _to get yourself killed or something?"

Freddie rolled his eyes. "I'm not gonna get _killed_. This guy is a harmless virus creator. He probably lives at home with his mom and has a part-time job as a muffler salesman or something."

"_How _can you possibly know that?" Sam snapped. "For all you know he's five-hundred pounds and can squeeze you so hard your eyes pop out!"

"Well I have to fix this webpage, Sam!" Freddie said.

"So you're gonna risk getting beat up or _worse _by some Internet guy just so iCarly will get back up?" Sam said, crossing her arms.

"I _told _you, nothing bad is gonna happen," Freddie said. "Besides…why would _you _care if it did?"

Sam's face fell for a fraction of a second before she quickly recomposed herself.

"You know what? Since you seem so convinced that I don't care…I just _won't_! Go meet that Internet freak tomorrow! Do whatever you want!"

"I will," Freddie said firmly. "I _will_."

…..

Freddie sighed as he sat at the small table in the middle of the diner he was supposed to meet the creator of the virus.

_This guy was supposed to be here twenty minutes ago_, he thought to himself, sipping his soda. _Where __**is **__he?_

"Hey," a voice behind him said just as he was about to give up hope. "You Freddie Benson?"

"Yes," Freddie said, turning around. "I-Oh."  
The man standing behind him was not at all like who he was expecting. This man stood at least a foot-and-a-half above him and was easily two hundred pounds heavier.

"Are-Are you DestructO500?" Freddie asked somewhat nervously.

"That's me," the man sneered. "So you want me to fix that webpage of yours?"

"Well, yes, like-like I said, your virus, which is _very _impressive, by the way, seems to be giving us a bit of trouble," Freddie nodded. "So, um, if you could just tell me how to get rid of it, that would be great."

"Yeah, that would be great," the man nodded, and Freddie didn't like the way he was beginning to crack his knuckles. "Or, what would be even _greater_ would be me teaching you a lesson about trying to mess with _my _viruses."

"Um…well I think we have very different opinions of what 'great' entails," Freddie chuckled nervously. "So…what do you say? Can you take the virus off of our webpage? We-We'd really appreciate it."

"Hmmm," the man said, appearing to consider this for a moment. "No. I think I'll just do this."

And with that he shoved Freddie hard to the ground.

_Aw man_, Freddie thought as he winced in pain from the floor. _What happened to computer freaks being geeky and scrawny?_

…..

Sam shook her head as she stood outside the diner, looking in again and watching Freddie sitting alone at his table.

_I can't believe I even came here_, Sam thought to herself. _Why should've I? That nub thinks I don't care about him…I should've stayed at home and watched reruns all day. That would've showed him how much I cared all right._

_**But you do care**__, _the other voice in Sam's head reminded her. It was the same voice that had convinced her to come here in the first place. _**You care a lot…Even if he can't seem to see that.**_

Just then Sam saw a large man approach Freddie.

_Yeah, that's some harmless looking dude,_ Sam thought, rolling her eyes.

"Alright, Freddie," Sam whispered. "Just get him to fix that virus and get out of there…"

She watched the two talk for a few moments, Freddie appearing to grow more and more nervous as they went on.

And then, Sam's mouth dropped open as the man shoved Freddie to the ground.

Without even wasting a second, Sam raced into the diner. After all, there was only _one _person allowed to shove Freddie around.

"Hey!" Sam said loudly, causing the man to turn towards him, just as he was about to hit Freddie again. "Get your hands off of him!"

"Sam?" Freddie said in shock. "What are you _doing _here?"

"Ha? You brought this little girl as backup?" the man laughed. "What you think I won't hit you because you're a _girl _honey? Tough luck. You might be cute, but I hurt everybody equally."

He shoved Sam, causing her to fall to the floor and scrape her arm on the tile.

"Oh, you're _really _gonna wish you didn't do that," Sam said threateningly as she quickly got to her feet.

"I'm _so _scared," the man said, rolling his eyes. "What are you gonna do? Bat your eyelashes and-Ah!"

Sam had grabbed his arm and flipped him to the ground with such ease she might as well have been flipping a stuffed animal.

"Ow!" the man said indignantly. "That _hurt_!"

"Good!" Sam snapped, grabbing the man's collar and glaring at him. "Now you have ten seconds to tell _him _how to get rid of that virus before I hit you so hard you'll wake up not even knowing what your name is!"

"Okay, okay!" the man said, flinching at the sight of Sam's fist. He pulled out a slip of paper and handed it to Freddie. "Here, this is the access code you need to get rid of the virus. Just-Just don't hurt me anymore!"

"Now get out of here!" Sam said, releasing the man's shirt. "And if you ever send us another virus again, you'll find out what pain really is!"

"Sam," Freddie said slowly, getting to his feet as the man ran out of the diner. "You-You saved me. That guy was going to destroy me."

"Save it," Sam mumbled. "I did it so we could finally get our webpage back."

She turned and headed toward the door.

"Wait, Sam?" Freddie said, running after her. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Sam said, avoiding his eyes.

"Your elbow's bleeding," Freddie said softly, pulling a napkin out of his pocket and gently wiping her wound. "Seriously, what's wrong? You just saved the web show? Why aren't you rubbing that in my face?"

Sam rolled her eyes as she jerked her arm away from him. "Just leave it…After all, if I apparently don't care about you, why should you pretend to care about me?"

And with that she stormed off, leaving a very confused Freddie behind her.


	457. Chapter 457

_Hang_

"This is _so _unfair!" sixteen-year old Ashton exclaimed as she stormed into the Benson house after school one day.

"What is?" Sam asked, looking up from her computer she had been typing on.

"Valentine's Day is tomorrow!" Ashton snapped.

"What? It is?" Sam frowned. "Dang it! I knew I was forgetting something! Now I have to run out to the store and try and find something for your dad…Wait, I thought _you_ loved Valentine's Day."  
"I do!" Ashton said. "It's my favorite holiday! I love getting cute cards for people and wearing a new pink outfit and watching all the sweet T.V. specials. But _this _year is the first year in like, _ever_ that I'm dateless! Even when I was in kindergarten I had boys lining up to play tag with me on Valentine's Day!"  
Sam rolled her eyes. "Well honey, you'll just have to celebrate Valentine's Day like the rest of the single people in America. Buy yourself a box of chocolate and curl up in bed while you hate on everybody who _is _in a relationship!"

"Please mother, only losers do that," Ashton scoffed.

"Hey! That's how I spent some of my best Valentine's Days when I was in high school!" Sam defended.

"And what makes this whole thing even _worse_," Ashton continued, ignoring her mother's comment. "Is that _Emma, _the girl who has tried to write to D.C. to get this day off the calendar, has a date! Her and Quincy will get to have an adorable, romantic Valentine's Day while I'm stuck _here_."

"Aw, Ash," Sam said as her daughter sat down next to her. "I know it's probably a little weird seeing your sister in a relationship while you're not-"

"I'm not _jealous _or anything," Ashton mumbled.

"Um…okay," Sam said. "But sweetie, you know how happy she is with Quincy. Shouldn't you be _glad_ that your sister can enjoy Valentine's Day for once?"

"No," Ashton said darkly. "Because she doesn't even _appreciate _the holiday!"

"Hmm," Sam said, smiling knowingly. "You sure you're not even a tiny bit jealous right now?"

"No!"

"Well Ash, your sister is going to spend Valentine's Day with Quincy no matter what," Sam told her gently. "Now you can either mope about not having a date or you can try and still enjoy tomorrow. Why don't you and Clarissa hang out? She's not dating anybody either. You two can watch movies and do your nails and all that sleepover chiz you like to do. Wouldn't that be more fun than just pouting around?"

"You know what? This is _not _the time for a pep talk, mom," Ashton said, getting to her feet.

"Where are you going?" Sam asked as Ashton stomped off towards the stairs.

"To pout!"

…

"Happy Valentine's Day, baby," Freddie said, walking into the house and wrapping his arms around his wife.

"Happy Valentine's Day," Sam smiled, kissing him deeply.

"These are for you," Freddie said, handing her a large bouquet of roses.

"Aw," Sam grinned, taking them from him. Though she got them every year, she never got sick of them. "Thank you."

"Close your eyes now," Freddie said, his arms still wrapped around her. "Those flowers aren't _all _I have for you."

"Dude, the kids are right upstairs," Sam said.

"Not _that_," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Now come on, just close your eyes. For me?"

"You're not supposed to use that line on _me_," Sam chuckled, though she shut her eyes anyway.

She felt Freddie's arms leave her body and a few seconds later she felt him push her hair away from the back of her neck as he laced something cold and metallic around it.

She opened her eyes and looked down, letting out a soft gasp as she stared down at the beautiful diamond necklace. "Oh my God," she whispered. "Freddie, it-it's beautiful."

"Like you," Freddie said.

Sam threw her arms around her husband, kissing him again.

"What? I'm not gonna get punched for that cheesy line?" Freddie chuckled when they pulled apart.

"This is the one day of the year you can get away with that stuff, so you better get it all out of your system," Sam smirked. "Seriously though, baby, this-this is amazing. Thank you. Although…now I kind of feel bad about my gift for you."

"Don't worry about that, I don't need anything today other than you being here with me," Freddie said.

"Yeah, well, I got you this anyway," Sam said, handing him an envelope. "I-I spent all day at the mall today trying to find you something, but, well, I couldn't find anything I thought you'd like. So I got you that."

Freddie opened up the envelope and pulled out a small slip of paper. "This coupon entitles Freddie Benson to thirty minutes talking to his hot, sexy wife Sam about his stupid boring train obsession without any insults, sarcastic remarks, punches, or any other interruptions at all," he read. He looked at his wife. "Are you serious? You're gonna let me talk to you about trains without hitting me or calling them stupid?"

"I guess I am," Sam sighed.

"Okay, this is the best gift ever!" Freddie grinned, picking her up and spinning her around. "You're the best!"

"I know," Sam said. "Oh…" she lowered her voice. "While I was at the mall, I _did _get a few things from Build-A-Bra you might also like. So tonight, I'll give you part _two_ of your gift."

"Part-Part two?" Freddie whispered, his eyes widening.

"Yup," Sam grinned. "So if I were you, I wouldn't use that coupon tonight."

"I'm not a moron," Freddie chuckled as him and Sam sat down on the sofa, cuddling together. "So where is everybody?"

"Well Emma's getting ready for her date with Quincy," Sam said. "And Tyler's playing videogames upstairs. Oh Jason called today to tell me he needed to borrow fifty bucks to take Eileen out tonight. I swear, he's twenty years old and still thinks he can spend all our money."

"You gave him the money, didn't you?" Freddie said knowingly.

"Well…yes," Sam nodded. "But I told him it was the last time!"

"Sure," Freddie said. "What about Ashton? What's she up to tonight?"

"She's still upset that she doesn't have a Valentine's date," Sam sighed. "Poor kid."

"Eh, one Valentine's Day alone won't kill her," Freddie said. "Besides, I don't think I could handle having both girls out on dates on the same night. My heart's not as strong as it used to be you know."

"I think she's a little jealous that Emma has a serious boyfriend now," Sam continued. "I mean Emma has been spending a lot of time with Quincy lately."  
"Well, I'll say this again," Freddie said. "We wouldn't have any of these problems if we followed my No-Dating rule, now would we?"

"You're a nub," Sam said as she rested her head on Freddie's shoulder. "You know, I sort of wish we could've gone out tonight. It sucks that everybody else had their own Valentine's Day plans and couldn't watch Tyler for us."

"Yeah," Freddie sighed. "Hey…he _is _twelve. We left Jason and the twins home alone when they were his age. What's the worst that could happen if we left him here while we went out for dinner and a movie or something?"

"Mom! Dad!" Tyler said, running into the living room, his hands and shirt covered in dirt. "I just dug a giant ditch in the backyard! Come watch me do an awesome jump over it with my dirt bike!"

"No! Tyler you're gonna break your-" Sam yelled, but the boy had already run off back outside.

"Yeah, we're not leaving him alone until he's thirty," Freddie said as him and Sam quickly got up off the couch.

….

Ashton laid on her bed, rolling her eyes as she stared over at her twin, who was playing on her Pearpad, popping her bubble gum.

"Could you just spit that stuff out?" Ashton snapped as Emma popped her gum again.

"What's _your _problem?" Emma asked. "You've been on the jank all day."

"I don't have a problem," Ashton said defensively. "Excuse me for wishing the person I'm forced to share a room with wouldn't be so loud!"

"Pfft, I know why you're in such a bad mood," Emma grinned. "You're peeved off you don't have Valentine's date tonight."

"Shut up!" Ashton retorted.

"Hmm, it must suck having to spend this day all by yourself," Emma said brightly. "Good thing _I _have a date tonight. Try not to make too much of a mess up here tonight, Ash. You know, while you're busy being _alone_."

"Will you knock it off?"

"What?" Emma asked innocently, enjoying finally having a chance to be the one going out on this day instead of it being the other way around. "I was just saying how excited I am for my _date_ tonight. It's not my fault your jealous that I have a boyfriend and you don't."

Ashton rolled her eyes. "Then maybe you should actually start getting ready for your date."

"Eh, I have time," Emma shrugged, looking back down at her Pearpad. "Quincy isn't picking me up until six."  
"Yeah, and it's five-forty, genius," Ashton said. "Have you checked the clock?"  
"What?" Emma exclaimed, tossing her Pearpad aside as she checked her phone. "No! I set my alarm to go off at four! How am I supposed to get all dolled up in twenty minutes?"

"Ha, Valentine's Day amateur," Ashton chuckled as she watched her sister rush over to her closet.

"I don't even know what I'm wearing yet!" Emma moaned. "Ugh! This is just _great_!"

"Please, since when do you care what you wear?" Ashton pointed out. "Just throw something on like you always do."

"This was going to be my first fancy night out with Quincy!" Emma groaned. "I wanted it to be nice and special! He was taking me to a really expensive restaurant and then we were gonna go to this little outdoor theatre."

Ashton's expression lightened slightly as she continued to watch Emma tare apart her closet.

"Now our first Valentine's Day is gonna suck all because of me," Emma sighed. "As usual, I messed everything up."

"Well, um if-if you want, you can borrow the dress I bought last month to wear tonight," Ashton offered, going to her own closet and pulling out a light blue dress. "You know, when-when I thought I would have a date."

"You never let me borrow your clothes though," Emma frowned.

"Yeah, well, as long as you promise not to get food on it, I guess it's okay," Ashton shrugged. "I mean…it _is _your first Valentine's Day with Quincy."

"Oh, well, thanks," Emma said. She looked up at her sister. "Um, sorry for making fun of you earlier for not having a date tonight."

"Eh, I deserve it, I've done it to you every other Valentine's Day, " Ashton pointed out. She cleared her throat. "So, um, I-I can put a few quick curls in your hair if you want? And I'm good at doing make-up fast. Here, sit down and I'll start your eyeliner while we wait for the curler to heat up."

"Not too much of that gunk, okay?" Emma said as Ashton grabbed her make-up bag. "I don't want to look like a clown."

"You won't," Ashton promised.

She rifled through the bag, looking for the right shade to use on her sister.

"So," she said. "You-You excited for tonight?"

"Yeah," Emma said softly. "I've never had a boyfriend on Valentine's Day before…Not like you."

"You and Quincy have been together eight months though," Ashton pointed out. "Trust me…I-I'd trade those short little relationships I pull together on Valentine's Day for what you and Quincy have any day."

"Really?"

"If you want to know the truth, I-I guess I _am _a little jealous of you guys," Ashton admitted, applying some blush to Emma's cheeks. "Seeing you guys spending all your time together, being all cute and everything. I mean…I'm happy for you guys. But I just wish I could find a guy who loves me as much as Quincy loves you."

Emma frowned. "You-You really think he loves me?"

Ashton nodded, smiling. "Duh. He's crazy for you, Em."

She could see her sister's cheeks reddening even through the blush.

"Thanks for helping me get ready," Emma said to Ashton. "You really saved me big time."

"Just have a good time with Quincy tonight," Ashton told her.


	458. Chapter 458

_Wrist_

"Hey, Freddie!" Carly said brightly, letting Freddie into her and Sam's shared apartment. "I didn't know you were coming over."

"I thought I'd be spontaneous and surprise Sam with an impromptu date," Freddie chuckled. "Speaking of dates…are you going out? You're all dressed up."

"Nah, I'm going with Spencer to a wedding," Carly explained. "One of our dad's friend's daughter's is getting married."

"Oh, well have fun," Freddie said.

"Thanks," Carly said, grabbing her purse. "Sam's in her room I think."  
As Carly left the apartment, Freddie headed back to Sam's bedroom and knocked on her door.

"What?" she called.

"Hey," Freddie said, letting himself in, spotting his girlfriend sitting on her bed.

"Hey," Sam said. "What are you doing here?"

"What? A guy can't spend a Friday night with his girlfriend?" Freddie smirked, sitting down next to her and kissing her. "Come on, let's go out. We can go get dinner."

"Um, actually, I-I don't think I'm really in the mood to go out," Sam said softly.

Freddie frowned. "Why not? In the five years we've been dating, you've never turned down dinner before. Especially when I'm buying."

"I just want to stay in, okay?" Sam told him. "Can we just order in or something?"

"Sure," Freddie said. "But what's the matter, baby?"

"Nothing," Sam mumbled, but Freddie knew better.

"Come on, something's bothering you," Freddie said. "You can tell me, Sam."

"It's nothing, okay?" Sam said firmly.

"Okay," Freddie nodded.

"Sorry," Sam sighed. "I-I'm glad you came. I didn't exactly want to spend tonight alone anyway. But-But could we please just relax and watch a movie or something?"

"Of course," Freddie said. "Whatever you want."

"Thanks," Sam said, giving him a small smile as she leaned up to kiss him again. "You're the best."

"Nah, I think that'd be you," Freddie chuckled, kissing her again.

…..

Later that evening, Sam and Freddie were sitting in the living room, watching a movie. Sam was sitting in Freddie's lap, and Freddie was playing with the ends of her long curls.

He wasn't paying too much attention to the movie, though. He kept looking at Sam's face, and he could tell she was still preoccupied by whatever had been on her mind earlier that she didn't want to talk about. She was biting the corner of her lip and her left eyebrow was slightly raised; things she always did when she was deep in thought.

As much as Freddie wanted to ask Sam what it was that was troubling her, he knew she didn't like to be nagged. It would be much better to wait. It may take her some time, but she always did wind up confiding in him about her problems.

"Hey," she suddenly said softly, grabbing the remote and pausing the movie. "Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, what's up?" Freddie asked.

"First promise me that you'll answer this question completely unbiased," Sam said. "Just-Just pretend we're not dating for the next minute."

"Sam, what is it?" Freddie questioned, curious.

Sam took a deep breath. "Compared to other girls out there…am I on the attractive or unattractive side?"

Freddie frowned. "Huh?"

"Just pretend I'm some girl you saw on the street," Sam said. "Would you think I'm pretty? Or would you think I'm…icky looking."

"Sam, of course I think you're pretty," Freddie said. "You're beautiful."

"I told you not to answer like my boyfriend," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Seriously, if we weren't dating, what would you think?"

"Exactly that," Freddie said seriously. "Baby, even if I wasn't dating you and had no idea who you were…I'd still think you were as beautiful as I do now."

Sam sighed. "I think I've just got you brainwashed really well."

"No," Freddie said. "Sam? Why are you asking this anyway?"

Sam shook her head. "Never mind. Let's get back to the movie."

"Wait, Sam," Freddie said, gently grabbing her wrist to keep her from picking up the remote. "Sam…seriously, please tell me why you're suddenly concerned about this."  
Sam looked down at her feet. "It's dumb."

"I don't care."

"Fine," Sam slowly agreed. "I-I went to go visit Carly at work today, you know, over at her magazine studio. And when I was waiting for her at her office, all these other fashion writers and models were just all huddled together…staring at me. And whispering. And then…and then I heard one of them say they couldn't understand how someone like _Carly _would ever be friends with someone like me; that I don't look like I should even be setting _foot _in a fashion magazine studio."

"Oh, Sam," Freddie said. "That's crazy."

"I know, it's stupid, I _told_ you," Sam mumbled. "I shouldn't care what other people think and _blah, blah, blah_."

"It's not stupid for you to feel hurt by that," Freddie told her. "I mean, as untrue as it was, I-I know it couldn't have felt good to hear. Heck, everybody feels hurt when they hear stuff like that being said about them, even if they know it's not true. But you _do _know those girls weren't right; they were just being morons. I mean if they're just sitting around judging every person who walking into that studio, they clearly don't have anything better to do at work. You do know you're _stunning_, right?"

Sam shrugged. "Whatever. Like I said, you're brainwashed from hanging around me too much."

"No, Sam!" Freddie said, a little more forcefully than he had intended. "It's not just because I'm your boyfriend that I'm saying that. You really _are _beautiful. I-I really wish you could see that."

"I mean…I know I'm not _ugly_," Sam said slowly. "But…come on, Freddie, you've got to notice that there are _much _prettier girls out there. Look at Carly!"

"Yeah, sure, Carly's pretty," Freddie agreed. "And so are you!"

"I'm average," Sam said, sliding off his lap and getting to her feet. "My hair's not straight and shiny-"

"It's golden and curly," Freddie said, also standing up. "Something I'm sure a lot of girls would kill for."

"I don't have those 'sexy eyes' you see on those mascara commercials," Sam mumbled. "My eyelashes are so dinky and short they might as well not be there."

"You have the bluest eyes anyone could ever imagine," Freddie said. "You wouldn't _want_ to hide them behind six-inch eyelashes."

"I'm not super thin or tall like some girls."

"You have curves," Freddie said. "Which, _trust me_, is what most guys want. Seriously, Sam, why are you letting what a couple of idiot girls down at Carly's magazine studio get to you so much?"

"I-I don't know," Sam admitted. "It's-I guess it's just a stupid girl thing. Sometimes…sometimes you just have those days when you feel…ugly, okay? I dunno, maybe it's hormones or some chiz like that."

"Oh…yeah, I-I guess that is true," Freddie nodded slowly. "Now that I think about it, I remember my mom freaking out about things like this when I lived with her in high school."

"Wow, thanks for comparing me to your mother," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "I feel so much better now."

"Look, Sam, I-I know you may not always think so, but you really are beautiful," Freddie said. "Breath-taking even. And…I guess I could be considered a little biased, you know, because I'm your boyfriend, but-but just know that's really how I feel."

Sam gave him a small smile as she stepped closer to him, giving him a small kiss. "Thanks. I guess you're really the only one who I actually do care about impressing anyway…"

"You impress me by just being you," Freddie whispered.

He took her hands in his.

"You make me loose my breath just by the way you smile," Freddie told her. "I've never seen anybody smile like you…"

Sam blushed. "Yeah, well…Carly _does _drag me to the dentist twice a month."

"And your eyes are gorgeous," Freddie continued. "I swear, I wish I could look at them for hours sometimes."

"That sounds pretty boring," Sam chuckled.

"And your laugh sounds like something you'd only hear in your dreams," Freddie said. "I love when I can get you to laugh, just so I can hear it."

Sam smirked. "It's hard not to laugh when you can be so nubby sometimes."

"Sam, you really are perfect," Freddie said, squeezing her hands lightly. "There isn't a thing about you that I'd ever want to change."

Sam didn't reply as she just stared up at him lovingly.

"Although…actually," Freddie said thoughtfully. "Maybe…maybe there is one thing I'd change about you."

"What?" Sam frowned.

Freddie smiled at her, leaning down to kiss her again. "Your finger," he said softly. "Your ring finger…it kind of seems a little…bare."

"Huh?" Sam said, confused. "What do you-Oh my God…"

Freddie had lowered himself on one knee, pulling a small velvet box out of his pocket. He opened it up to reveal a shining diamond ring.

"Samantha Joy Puckett," he said as Sam covered her mouth with her hand. "I've never felt the way I do when I'm with you around anybody else. I wake up thinking about you, I go to work thinking about you, and I go to bed still thinking about you. You've become such an important part of my life that I can't imagine living any of it without you in it. I love you so much…you really are the most beautiful, perfect woman I could even begin to imagine. So Sam? Will you do me the honor of marrying me?"

Sam, who now had tears in her eyes, quickly nodded her head. "Yes," she said. "Yes! Yes, I'll marry you!"

Freddie's face broke into a huge smile as he slid the ring onto her finger. He got back up to his feet and pulled her into his arms, kissing her deeply.


	459. Chapter 459

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 449, where Mrs. Benson dies.**

…

_Priority_

"Hey, do you guys think Freddie will like this wreath I made for his mom?" Spencer asked Sam and Carly, holding up a large, beautiful wreath. Unlike most of his artwork, this piece lacked the usual wacky colors and crazy theme. It was simple, made up of many white roses.

"It looks nice," Carly nodded.

"Yeah," Sam agreed. "He'll love it, Spence."

It had been two days since Mrs. Benson had passed away, and Sam had been making supporting Freddie her priority. She had spent almost every minute with him, doing her best to help him through this difficult time.

"Where _is_ Freddie?" Carly asked Sam softly.

"With his dad," Sam replied. "He came in late last night."

"Well that's good," Carly said. "He should be with him right now."

"He hasn't seen him in almost three years," Sam told her. "They're not very close."

"Oh," Carly frowned. "Well-Well maybe his dad will take this as an opportunity to get a better relationship with Freddie."

"Hopefully," Sam nodded.

Just then she felt her phone buzz, and she saw she had a text from Freddie.

_**Can you come over?**_ she read on her screen.

_**On my way**_, she instantly replied.

"I need to go," Sam said to Carly and Spencer. "Freddie's back."

"Tell him we're here if he needs us," Carly said.

Sam left the Shay's apartment and knocked on Freddie's door across the hall.

"Hey," he said, letting her in. "That was fast."

"I was at Carly's," Sam explained. "Is-Is your dad here?"

"Yeah," Freddie mumbled. "He's back in the guest room getting set up. We just got back from getting lunch."

"How is he?" Sam asked.

Freddie shrugged. "I dunno. I wasn't really in the mood for talking. Usually when I see my dad he tries to make up for not seeing me too often. You can tell he's still trying to do that. He tried to take me to the Pear Store after we ate to get me a new laptop, but I told him I just wanted to come home."

"Well he's trying," Sam said.

"Now's not the time for him to be trying to make up for not seeing me in three years with presents," Freddie said.

"Freddie," came a voice down the hall. "Freddie, I'm about to run out and-Oh, hello."

Sam stared at the tall man in front of her. She could instantly tell he was Freddie's father; the two looked very similar.

"Um, dad," Freddie said, clearing his throat. "This-This is Sam. My girlfriend."

"Nice to meet you, Sam," Freddie's father said, shaking her hand.

"You too, Mr. Benson," Sam said.

"You can call me Robert," he told her. He turned to Freddie. "Okay, son, I'm going to go to the funeral home now to make the final arrangements for Saturday. You want anything while I'm out?"

"No," Freddie said at once.

"Alright, well, I'll be back in a few hours," Robert said. "Call if you need me."

Freddie sat down on the plastic covered couch as his father shut the door behind him. "He's taking care of all the funeral stuff," Freddie said to Sam.

"That's nice of him," Sam said.

"There really wasn't any other choice; I don't have the money to pay for it," Freddie shrugged.

Sam sat down next to him. "Try and give him a chance, okay?"

"It's hard to give him a chance when we both know if my mom wasn't dead he probably would've gone another year without swinging by," Freddie said darkly.

Sam squeezed his hand. "He's your dad. You know you love him."  
Freddie didn't reply.

"So, um, I-I have all your schoolwork that you asked me to get you from today," Sam said. "I'll go put in your room later. All your teachers said to take your time with it."

"I'll work on it tonight," Freddie said.

"No, baby, you don't need to worry about it now," Sam said. "At least wait until Saturday, after the funeral."

"I sort of want to take my mind _off _the funeral," Freddie said, leaning back on the couch, shifting in his seat a little bit.

"Well…why don't you come over to my place then?" Sam suggested. "You can take your mind off of stuff and it will give your dad some more time to keep planning everything here."

"Okay," Freddie agreed. "Yeah…that'd be nice. I sort of want to get away from here for a little bit anyway."

"Good," Sam smiled. "We'll go there tonight."

"Man, this stupid couch is so uncomfortable with this plastic wrap," Freddie said, shifting in his seat again. "I wish I could take it off…"

As he said that, he slowly frowned. "Oh…I-I guess I can now, can't I?"

Sam said nothing as she hugged him tightly, letting him cry into her shoulder.

….

"I hate funerals," Sam mumbled to Carly that Saturday as the girls stood off in a corner at the funeral home.

"Me too," Carly sighed. "But we're here for Freddie. You know Sam, I think it's great the way you've been helping him out. It really shows how your relationship has grown."

"Thanks," Sam said, giving her best friend a small smile. "I just wish Freddie didn't have to go through this right now."

"I know," Carly agreed. "But he's pretty lucky to have you at his side the whole time. Anyway, I need to go find Spencer. I'll talk to you in a little bit."  
As Carly left, Sam looked over at Freddie, who was talking to his grandparents. She was about to go get some water when suddenly Freddie's father approached her.

"Hi," he said kindly. "You have a minute?"

"Um, sure," Sam nodded. "What is it?"

"I just wanted to thank you for all you've done for my son these last few days," Robert told her. "You've really been there for him. Without you, he probably wouldn't have gotten out of bed some days."

"It's nothing," Sam shrugged. "He'd-He'd do the same for me."

"You know he really loves you," Robert continued. "Whenever I get a chance to speak with him on the phone, you're all he talks about."

Sam smiled. "Really?"

"Yeah," Robert sighed. "I know Freddie and I aren't exactly close…And I suppose that's my fault. After his mom and I split up, I should've made more of an effort to see him. But even I can tell you guys are going to last."

Sam didn't reply.

"I wish I hadn't waited until now to come back into Freddie's life," Robert said slowly. "He's leaving for college soon…he's all grown up." He took a deep breath and looked down at Sam. "Can I ask you to do me a favor?"

"Um, okay," Sam said hesitantly.  
"Promise me that you'll always be there for my son," Robert whispered. "He needs a girl like you in his life. Especially when I've been gone for so long."

Sam nodded. "I'll always be there for him," she assured him. "I love him."

….

"Thanks for staying the whole time with me," Freddie said to Sam as the last of the funeral guests finally cleared out.

"Of course," Sam said, taking his hand. She kissed his cheek gently. "You feeling okay?"

"I-I guess I feel better than I did earlier," Freddie said. "Must be that closure thing."

"Maybe," Sam nodded.

"Hey," Freddie said. "What-What were you and my dad talking about earlier? I saw you two over in the back of the room."

"He told me that he thinks we're gonna last," Sam told him.

Freddie smiled. "Well, I guess that's one thing he got right."

"He really wants to be a part of your life," Sam said softly. "He loves you."

Freddie nodded. "Yeah…I-I guess if I've learned anything this week, it's that I should try and spend time with him while I still can."

He put an arm around Sam. "Seriously Sam, you-you've been amazing through this whole thing."

"Come on, it was nothing," Sam said. "What kind of girlfriend would just leave her boyfriend to deal with this on his own?"

"Well, either way," Freddie said, hugging her tightly. "I couldn't have gotten through this without you. Thank you, Sam."


	460. Chapter 460

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 450, where Sam begins dating a new guy.**

…**.**

_Particular_

Freddie Benson stifled a yawn as he flipped through channels on the Shay's television.

This certainly wasn't the ideal way for a teenage boy to spend a Friday night, but he didn't have many other options.

Carly and Spencer were visiting their granddad in Yakima, Gibby was out enjoying his dream job as the new Pini's men's room attendant and his mother was the whole reason he was over in the Shay's empty apartment in the first place, for she had just bought a new tick vacuum and was eager to test it out.

And then there was Sam, who was out with Shawn.

It still broke Freddie's heart any time he thought about him with her. They had been together a little over a month now and he knew they'd probably be together much longer than that.

_Why'd she have to move on_? Freddie thought miserably to himself. _Why couldn't we have made it work again? Why-Why'd I let her go in the first place?_

Freddie believed that this whole thing would be a lot easier for him to handle if he could at least find _some _reason to hate that stupid Shawn guy. But he had to admit it; Shawn was a pretty great guy. He treated Sam with respect, just like she deserved. He held doors open for her, he carried her books for her, he found any excuse to buy her flowers, and he even wrote her love poems. Plus, as if that wasn't bad enough, he was nice to him too! He didn't rub it in his face that he was now dating his ex-girlfriend; in fact, he always seemed to make sure to keep any affection between him and Sam to a minimum when Freddie was around.

_At least she's happy_, Freddie reminded himself. _That's all that counts…that's all I want. _

Freddie turned off the T.V. suddenly wanting nothing more than to just curl up in his own bed and to try and forget all about Sam and Shawn, and how much fun they must be having right now on their date.

Just as he was about to get to his feet, thought, the apartment door opened and Sam walked in, wearing a dark blue dress that hugged her body perfectly.

Freddie's stomach began to do flip-flops at once.

"Oh, hey," Sam said, surprised to see him. "What are you doing here?"

"I was just watching T.V.," Freddie replied. "I was about to go back home though."

Sam nodded. "Um, Carly here?"

"No, she's in Yakima, remember?"  
"Oh," Sam mumbled. "That's right."

"Why are _you _here?" Freddie asked, looking at his watch. "It's not even ten yet. I thought you were out with Shawn."

"Yeah, I was," Sam sighed.

"Your date ended early?"

"I guess you can say that," Sam shrugged. "Breaking up _does _tend to bring dates to a close."

Freddie's eyes widened. "What? You-You broke up?"

Sam nodded.

Freddie's first instinct was to jump up in the air for joy. Shawn was out of the picture now, and Sam was single again!

But the look on her face kept his feet firmly on the ground.

"I-I'm sorry," Freddie said as she kicked her heels off. "Are you okay?"

"I guess," Sam replied. She looked up at Freddie. "And since you were probably wondering…he dumped _me_."

"I-I wasn't-" Freddie stammered.

"Relax, it's okay," Sam told him, collapsing onto the couch.

"Well, um, Shawn-Shawn's a jerk anyway," Freddie said, sitting back down next to her.

"Nah," Sam sighed. "He was a good guy…Is. He's not dead or anything. Besides, it wasn't exactly a bad break-up. He was really nice about it."

_Of course he was_, Freddie thought rolling his eyes internally.

"And we're gonna stay friends. I'm just confused," Sam continued. "I thought we were really good, you know? We weren't fighting or anything-"

_Like we used to when we were dating_, Freddie said to himself.

"-So why'd he end it?" Sam said. "Was it me?"

"No," Freddie said at once. "Of course not. You're-You're amazing, Sam."

As the words left his mouth, Freddie realized how awkward that must've sounded, but Sam just gave him a small smile. "I am, aren't I?"

"Um, well, I-I know I'm not Carly," Freddie said after a moment. "But, um, it-if you want, you can spend the rest of the night here with me. I can try and do all those 'break-up activities' girls like. We can eat junk food, watch cheesy movies…I think I'll have to draw the line at painting nails, but-"

"There's no way we're painting nails," Sam scoffed. "Or watching cheesy movies. But I wouldn't say no to some junk food."

"Do you ever?" Freddie chuckled. "I think I saw some brownies in the fridge. Hopefully Spencer wasn't planning on eating them."

He went into the kitchen to grab the brownies.

_Why would Shawn break up with her? _Freddie asked himself as he looked over his shoulder back at Sam. _I thought he was really into her…_

Freddie returned to the couch with Sam, handing her the tray of brownies.

"I think there's nuts in these," Freddie told her as she began to dig in. "Maybe walnuts or peanuts or something…If you don't like these there's some mix in the cabinet I can fix up for us."

"Dude, it's fine, I'm not too particular with my brownies," Sam assured him, stuffing on in her mouth.

"So, um, are you sure you're alright?" Freddie asked gently. "I-I know you really liked this guy."

"Yeah," Sam said softly. "I did. And I always figured if we broke up I'd be upset about it, but-but I actually feel fine. Not great, but…I'll be okay."

"I can send him a virus if you want."

"No, don't do that," Sam grinned. "I told you, he was really nice. It's not like he did it through a text or something. It's just…well, he did say something that I didn't really get during the break-up speech."

"What?" Freddie asked.

"He told me that even though he _did _really like me, he knew it wasn't fair to me to stay together," Sam said. "Because he knew that no matter what, he couldn't give me the same love that someone else could give me, and that I'd be much happier with that person than I ever could with him."

Freddie blinked. "He-He said that?"

"Weird, right?" Sam said. "It's like he was telling me to go find someone who liked me more than he did."

"Yeah," Freddie nodded slowly. "Weird."

_You know_, Freddie thought as he watched Sam devour another brownie. _Maybe that Shawn kid isn't half bad._

…

That Monday at school, Freddie stood by his locker, flipping through a few binders as he placed them in his bag.

"Freddie?"

Freddie turned around to see Shawn standing behind him.

"Oh, um, hey," Freddie said, unsure of what to say to him. "I-I heard you and Sam broke up."

"Yeah," Shawn sighed. "That's what I wanted to talk to you about. Is she, you know, okay? I-I tried to be as nice as possible, I really did."

"She's fine," Freddie told him. He closed his locker.

"Good," Shawn said, relieved. "I didn't want to hurt her."

"Shawn," Freddie said slowly. "Why _did _you break up with her? I know you liked her."

Shawn smiled. "Yeah, I liked her a lot. She's probably one of the funniest, most original girls I've ever dated. I had a lot of fun with her. But that was the problem."

"Huh?"

"I just really, really _liked_ her," Shawn said. "I-I knew I wasn't in love with her. And I knew she wasn't in love with me either."

Freddie simply stared at him.

"You guys belong together," Shawn continued. "I-I just don't want to stay in the way of that. You're in love with Sam. And she may not realize it herself, but I think she's in love with you too."

_Who __**is **__this guy_? Freddie thought flabbergasted.

"Maybe one day I'll find a girl who I love like you love Sam," Shawn shrugged. "But for now…it would be wrong to stay with her when I know I could never give her what you could."

"Sam and I already broke up," Freddie said slowly.

Shawn gave him a small smile. "Then you must realize how much you need her back then, right?"

Freddie shook his head. "Okay, can you read minds or something?"

Shawn chuckled. "Nah, I grew up with five older sisters though, and I had no choice but to sit and watch way too many romance movies when my parents would make them watch me. I picked up a thing or two."

"I'll say," Freddie mumbled.

"Look, go get Sam back," Shawn told him.

Freddie sighed. "Um, listen Shawn, it was really nice of you to break up with her for me, but-but I just don't know if it would work out again between us. I guess you already know that _I _still have feelings for her, but she's clearly moved on. She went out with you after all."

"Yeah, and you know what I noticed?" Shawn said. "As much as she would smile when we went out, it was never the same smile she gave when you were around. Somehow she always managed to work you into our conversations and-and when we would kiss…I could tell she didn't feel anything. No matter what she would say. Maybe…maybe her dating me was just a way for her to try and forget about you. But I don't think she ever managed to do that."  
Freddie was silent for a few moments.

"You do what you want, okay?" Shawn said. "I can't force you to do anything."

Freddie took a deep breath. "You know, Shawn. I-I have a feeling you and I could be pretty good friends."

Shawn smirked. "Yeah, well, maybe some time we can hang out and watch some movie that doesn't have two people almost kissing on the cover. I've been meaning to start that _Galaxy Wars _series though, you know if it's any good?"

"I've heard it's alright," Freddie laughed. "Um, anyway…I should go. Um, thanks a lot, Shawn. You've really helped me out."

…..

That day after school, Sam was sitting up in Carly's bedroom, attempting to do her math homework as she promised Carly before she had run out to pick up Spencer from the junkyard.

"Stupid trig, when am I ever gonna use this?" Sam mumbled to herself as she flipped through her textbook.

Just then there was a soft knock at the door and Freddie walked into the bedroom.

"Perfect timing, nub!" Sam said. "I promised Carly I'd have this homework done by the time she got back, but that's not happening. Let me copy yours?"

"Um, Sam?" Freddie said, ignoring her question as he sat down on the sofa next to her.

"What?" Sam frowned.

Freddie took a deep breath. "You remember the other night, when-when you and Shawn broke up? You told me what he said to you…about-about him knowing he couldn't love you the same way he knew someone else could?"

"Yeah, so?" Sam shrugged. "It made no sense."

"Actually…it did," Freddie said.

"Wait, you know what he meant?" Sam asked.

Freddie nodded.

"Well what did he mean? Was it some sort of dumb boy code?"

"No," Freddie replied. "It-It wasn't. And I-I don't want to have to tell you exactly what it means…I-I want you to see if you can figure it out on your own."

"What? Come on, Benson," Sam moaned. "I've already done three math problems. I'm done using my brain today."

"Come on, you can do it," Freddie said. "Just try."

"Fine," Sam finally conceded. "Let's see…he said he couldn't give me the same love someone else could…so what? He was just saying he didn't love me. Believe it or not I gathered that. That's why we broke up."

"Think harder," Freddie said, praying Sam would piece together. "There's more."

"Ugh," Sam sighed, rolling her eyes. "What else is there? He-Okay, he said someone else could love me more. Well what's special about that? That just means he thinks I'll find some other guy."

"Um, try-try to think more specifically," Freddie said, looking down at his lap.

"Specifically?" Sam repeated. "Wait, was Shawn talking about a specific _person _who loved me more than he could?"

Freddie didn't reply.

"Well…how could he know that?" Sam asked, furrowing her brow in thought. "Besides…nobody's in love with me…are they?"

Freddie took a deep breath. "Really?"

"Huh?"

"No one's ever said they loved you?" Freddie asked. "Not even one person."

Suddenly, Sam's eyes widened. "Wait…it-it's not…it's you?"

"Yeah," Freddie slowly nodded. "It's me."

"But-what?"

"I didn't tell Shawn to break up with you or anything, I swear," Freddie said quickly. "He-He talked to me today. He said that he could tell how in love I still was with you, and well, that-that's true. And he said he knew he could never love you like I love you, so…"

"You still love me?" Sam whispered.

"Yeah," Freddie sighed. "Sam, I-I thought we were gonna get back together. Isn't that what we said? But now I guess you've moved on…I mean, you're already back on the dating field after all."

"You love me?" Sam said again. "Like…_love_ me?"

"Um, again…yes," Freddie said.

Sam looked down, her cheeks flushing. "I thought…never mind."

"No, what is it?"

"Nothing."

"Tell me."

"Fine," Sam said. "I-I thought you might've forgotten about that."

"You thought I forgot I told you I loved you?" Freddie frowned. "Sam, that's ridiculous. I've probably thought about it every day."

"Well, it's just…you just said it. I thought we were gonna get back together too," Sam said. "But you never-you never did anything!"

"What?" Freddie exclaimed.

"Yeah, I _wanted _us to get back together you nub!" Sam snapped, her voice rising. "Didn't you notice how dang _normal _I was acting? I only got detention like, four times since we broke up, the only time I talked to any cop was when Gibby made Carly and me spend five hours down at the police station about his lost cat, and I haven't hit you or sent you to the emergency room _once_!"

"So you wanted us to get back together?" Freddie said. "And you're blaming _me _for us not doing that? You're the one who went out with Shawn!"

"Yeah, because you weren't getting up off your butt to take me out again!" Sam pointed out. "So I figured I better get back in the dating game! And you know what? Shawn didn't make stupid jokes like you, he didn't give lectures about the history of every place we hung out at and he didn't kiss as good as you either!"

"Wait, really?"

"Yes!" Sam exclaimed. "You've ruined other guys for me, Benson! Because if I can't even feel _close _to how I felt with you with a guy like Shawn, what hope do I have?"

"Well then…" Freddie said slowly. "It looks like you'll just have to get back together with me."

"Yeah, well, I guess I have to!" Sam said loudly. "Because it looks like I'm gonna be in love with you for the rest of my dang life!"

"Well right back at you!" Freddie said, a bit confused at what was happened. "So I guess we're a couple again!"

"I guess we are!"

"Then we should probably kiss!"

"Yeah, we better!" Sam said, grabbing his shoulders and crashing her lips to his.

Freddie quickly wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer.

_How have I been able to function without this for so long? _Freddie thought to himself as he deepened the kiss.

"Okay Sam!" Carly suddenly said, letting herself back in her bedroom. "How's that homework coming-Oh my God!"

The couple didn't even to seem to notice Carly as they continued to kiss on another passionately.

"So…that homework's not gonna get done, is it?" Carly said, though a small smile appeared on her face.


	461. Chapter 461

**AN-So this oneshot is similar to chapter 460, where Sam began dating a new guy, only in this chapter, the roles are swapped. Hope you enjoy!**

…**..**

_Girlfriend_

"Sam!" Carly said loudly, looking over at her best friend, who was fast asleep on her couch. "Sam!"

"Oh come on!" Freddie moaned as he slid a batch of cupcakes into the oven. "She's not even helping us? Although I guess I shouldn't be surprised…"

"Oh no," Carly said, grabbing a banana from the fruit bowl. "It's her fault we have to bake ten dozen cupcakes; she's helping!"

And with that she chucked the banana right at Sam, snapping the blonde out of her slumber.

"Nice throw, Carls," Freddie chuckled, impressed.

"Thank you, I went to the gym with Spencer once last month," Carly said proudly.

"What was that for?" Sam demanded.

"Come help us bake all these cupcakes!" Carly said. "We only have three dozen made and they need to be done for Ms. Brigg's nephew's bar mitzvah by six!"

"Ugh, why can't you and Fredweird just keep doing it?" Sam moaned.

"Because it's your fault we're stuck making these in the first place!" Freddie exclaimed. "You were the one who put superglue on Ms. Brigg's seat!"

"Yeah, you're lucky she gave you the choice to bake all these cupcakes instead of just giving you a detention," Carly said. "One more of those and you'll be suspended! Now get your butt over here and frost these cupcakes."  
"Fine," Sam conceded, joining the other two in the kitchen.

"There," Carly said happily, turning back to the batter she was making. "Now with the _three _of us helping, we'll be done in no time."

"Yeah, we're actually making pretty good time," Freddie agreed. "If we keep up this pace-"

Suddenly his phone buzzed and he quickly set down his tray of cupcakes and pulled his Pearphone out from his pocket.

"Oh! I-I actually need to run," Freddie said, looking at his screen.

"What?" Carly frowned.

"Dude! You can't just leave!" Sam said. "Now I'm gonna have to even more work in here!"

"You guys will be fine," Freddie assured them.

"Where are you even going?" Carly asked.

"Probably out with his mom to pick up some more tick-resistant tighty-whities," Sam smirked.

"Ha, ha," Freddie said dryly.

"Well, it looks like it's just us," Carly said to Sam as Freddie hurried out of the apartment. "Come on, Sam, let's finish this up."

"I wonder what the nub is up to?" Sam said as she began to frost some of the finished cupcakes. "Hey, he ran out on rehearsal yesterday too, didn't he?"

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "Now that you mention it, he _has_ seemed busy lately. The last time he's run out in the middle of something we were doing was back when you two were dating and would leave me to finish whatever it was we were doing on my own so you two could make out!"

Sam smirked. "That happened like, _once_."

"Try once a day!"

"Well clearly Freddie isn't running off to make out with me, thank God," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "So he probably has some lame _Galaxy Wars_ convention to go to."

"I dunno, but I wish he would've at least helped us for a little while longer," Carly shrugged. "Because with just the two of us, it's going to take that much longer to get all these cupcakes-Sam! Get that frosting out of your mouth!"

….

"So did you and Sam finish all the cupcakes yesterday?" Freddie asked as him and Carly sat up in the studio the next day, working on homework.

"Yeah, barely," Carly nodded. "And then we had to wait for Socko to bring over his truck for us to use to get all those cupcakes over to Ms. Briggs. You know, I don't think I ever want to even _look _at another cupcake again."

"Sorry to run out on you guys," Freddie said. "I wish I could've done more to help."

"It's fine," Carly said. "But is everything okay? You've been running out a lot lately."

"What? Of course I'm fine," Freddie said.

"Well then what are you doing when you go?" Carly asked.

"Um…nothing?" Freddie said lamely.

Carly raised an eyebrow. "You ran out of the apartment yesterday pretty quickly for nothing."

"Look, I-I'm sorry I've been sort of flakey these last few days," Freddie said. "But I've just been…busy. And, um, I want to tell you about it, but now's not really the best time."

"Huh?" Carly frowned, confused. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine," Freddie chuckled, looking down at his phone again. "Actually…I do sort of need to go…"

"Freddie-"

"I-I just need to make sure of a few things before I let you know what-what's been going on, but just trust me, okay?" Freddie said.

"Did you join the Mafia or something? What is going on?" Carly asked, but Freddie already left the studio.

_Okay, __**what **__is up with that boy? _Carly thought to herself as she closed her textbook and started down the stairs after him. _He's acting weirder than Gibby did that time his mom switched his toothpaste brand._

"Hey, why was Freddie in such a rush?" Spencer asked as Carly came down into the living room. "He almost knocked down my raisin sculpture!"

"I don't know, he's been-raisin sculpture?" she looked at the large tower Spencer was constructing with small boxes of raisins.

"Yeah, the Dorfmans' are paying me to make them this baby to take with them to that raisin festival they go to every year," Spencer explained.

"Paying you?" Carly repeated. "They're our cousins. Shouldn't you be doing this for free?"

"Yeah, but…they're weird," Spencer shrugged. "Anyway, Freddie came rushing through here and almost knocked this whole thing down! I've spent three hours on this!"

"I don't know what's up with him, he's been acting really weird lately," Carly sighed. "He's been missing iCarly rehearsals, he's bailing on me and Sam…"

"Sounds like the Mafia," Spencer said.

"Right?" Carly exclaimed. She shook her head. "Well, I'm gonna go find out what's up with him."

"Okay, I'll be here, working on my raisin sculpture," Spencer said as Carly headed out the door and across the hall.

"Okay, Freddie!" Carly said, knocking at the Benson's door. "What is going on that is making you all-oh."

The Benson door had suddenly opened and Freddie stepped out.

Only he wasn't alone; a small, pretty-looking redhead was at his side, and Carly saw that they were holding hands.

"Um…hi," Carly said awkwardly.

"Hi!" the girl said brightly. She turned to Freddie. "Is this a friend of yours, Freddie?"

"Um, yeah, um, this is Carly," Freddie mumbled, looking slightly uncomfortable. "Carly, this-this is Annabelle."

"Nice to meet you, Carly," Annabelle smiled politely, releasing Freddie's hand to shake Carly's.

"You-You too," Carly said, very confused. "Um, well…Freddie, I can see you have company…I guess I'll just go back home and…sit."

"Hold on," Freddie sighed. He turned to Annabelle. "Would you mind waiting out here for a few minutes? I just need to talk to Carly about something really quick."

"Sure, no problem," Annabelle replied. "But remember, the movie starts in forty-five minutes."

"Don't worry, we'll make it," Freddie assured her as he opened up the Shay's door and led Carly inside.

The second the door closed, Carly opened her mouth.

"Who is she?"

"I told you, her name is Annabelle," Freddie replied.

"Are-Is she-Are you going _out _with her?"

Freddie took a deep breath. "I guess…sort of," he admitted. "Her mom is a nurse at the hospital with my mom. My mom and her mom got to talking and a couple weeks ago they set us up on this blind date thing."

"So you _are _going out then?" Carly said. "Why-Why didn't you say anything?"

"Because," Freddie said. "Nothing's official between us yet…We've gotten dinner a few times and gone to the movies and hung out at my place. I-I didn't want to say anything to you and just to have us fall apart in a few weeks anyway."

"Oh," Carly said slowly. "I-I guess that sort of makes sense…"

"And, well, um," Freddie continued, looking down at his feet. "I-I also didn't want Sam to, um, find out I'm starting to see people…"

Carly nodded. "Yeah…I guess…I guess that was smart of you. It would be a little awkward. You guys just broke up about two months ago. But, um, do you like this girl?"

Freddie's cheeks reddened slightly. "Yeah…I think I do. She's nice, she's sweet, she's funny, she's always interested in what I have to say, she's really smart…she's great."

Carly didn't say anything. She was torn right now. As much as she wanted to be happy for Freddie, she also couldn't help but think of her other best friend, who might have a different reaction to finding out Freddie was seeing a new girl.

Since their break-up, Sam didn't talk too much about her and Freddie's relationship. Whenever Carly would bring it up, she'd either make some crack about it or she'd change the subject completely.

_Maybe Sam would be okay with this_, Carly thought. _Or maybe…maybe she'd be really hurt…_

"Just-Just please don't tell Sam about this," Freddie said, snapping Carly out of her thoughts. "Please?"

"Well Freddie, she needs to find out eventually," Carly said. "She's noticed how weird you've been acting lately too. She's not an idiot; she'll figure it on her own soon enough."

"I know, and-and I'll tell her," Freddie said. "Soon. But I just don't know how to bring it up. I mean, is it too soon for us to be dating new people? Will she feel jealous? Will she be mean to Annabelle?"

"I think you need to talk to Sam," Carly said firmly. "That's the only way you'll figure those things out."

"Okay," Freddie sighed. "I guess…Maybe I can talk to her in study hall tomorrow. That will give me time to figure out what to say."

"Right," Carly agreed. She looked up at Freddie. "I mean…you really think you've moved on and are ready to date this new girl?"

She could've sworn Freddie's face dropped at those words, but he quickly recovered. "I-Yeah," he nodded. "I've moved on…It was bound to happen at some point right?"

Carly didn't say anything.

"Just…please don't mention this to Sam," Freddie said again, opening the apartment door.

As he stepped back into the hallway, though, his eyes widened as he saw Annabelle standing by his door, talking to none other than Sam.

"I-Sam?" Freddie frowned, his heart beating out of his chest from nerves. "What-What are you doing here?"

Sam gave a small shrug, for once not having any witty comment or insult to swing at him. "I was just talking with your date," she said simply.

"Yeah, isn't this nice? I got to meet both your friends today?" Annabelle smiled. "Sam was just telling me that the popcorn at the movie theatre is really good, we should get some when while we're there!"

"Oh, um, yeah," Freddie said, trying to look at Sam's expression, but she seemed to be avoiding his gaze.

"You guys should get going," Sam said. "There's a lot of traffic." She finally looked up at Freddie. "And I know how you hate it when you miss the previews."

"We'd better hurry then," Annabelle said, taking Freddie's hand again. "Bye Sam, bye Carly. Great meeting you both!"

As Freddie and Annabelle hurried off down the hall, Freddie cast one last look at Sam before turning the corner.

"Sam?" Carly said softly from the doorway. "Are-Are you okay?"

Sam didn't reply as she stared off where Freddie and Annabelle had been standing.

"Sam?"

"Huh? What?" Sam said, turning back to Carly.

"I asked if you were okay."

"Yeah?" Sam frowned. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Do you want to talk about this?" Carly asked gently.

"What's there to talk about?" Sam asked a bit too cheerfully. "Hey, I'll text you later. I need to get back home."

"But you just got here," Carly pointed out. "Don't you want to come over?"

"Yeah, but, um, I forgot to feed Frothy, so…I kind of need to do that," Sam said quickly. "You know, so he doesn't starve. I'll see you later."

Carly watched her best friend run off as she sadly crossed her arms over her chest.

"She's not okay," Carly whispered. "_She _didn't move on yet."

…

Later that evening, Sam had found her way back to the Shay's apartment. She had waited until she knew Carly and Spencer had left to go visit the Dorfmans before coming back over and picking the lock.

She knew if she were to have hung around Carly all day, she'd want to talk about Freddie's new little 'friend', and she definitely did not have the strength for that.

Honestly, Sam was beginning to suspect something like this was going on. All the texts and the secret outings…though she had hoped she had been wrong.

But it turned out this was the one time she managed to get something right.

"Why is he dating again?" Sam whispered to herself, hugging her knees to her chest as she stared blankly at the T.V., not really paying attention to what was on the screen. "Did he really get over me that fast?"

Sam sighed as she flipped through the channels, still deep in thought.

She supposed she should've seen this coming. True, her and Freddie _did _make a sort of agreement that they would give their relationship another try, and while _she _had been planning on following through with that promise, she should've realized that after two whole months of nothing from Freddie, he had clearly decided that them getting back together was just something he simply didn't want.

She hugged her knees tighter to her chest.

"So he's moved on," Sam said to herself. "Well…good for him! There aren't many girls out there who'd want to date his loser butt, so he should be grateful he's managed to find someone besides_me_who doesn't seem repulsed by him!"

_Actually, _the voice in her head told her. _Freddie's not the dork he used to be…he's hot. You know a lot of girls are probably after him…and you still wish you were the one girl who __**did **__have him._

"Well…at least anybody with eyes could see _I'm _ten times prettier than that stupid _Annabelle _chick," Sam scoffed. "He really downgraded there."

_She was beautiful_, the voice countered. _And you know it…Besides, she also seemed really sweet and nice and…__**normal**__. Things you can never be._

Sam turned off the T.V., angrily tossing the remote down as she got to her feet.

Why did Freddie have to go and do this? Why did he have to go get some new girlfriend and flaunt her all around when it had only been a couple months since they broke up! Even if they weren't dating, weren't they still _friends? _How could he do that to her?

_You know what_? the second, more aggressive voice in Sam's mind said as she furiously paced back and forth in the kitchen. _I should go over and beat some sense into that jerk's head! I should teach him a lesson! He thinks he can just forget about what __**we**__ had with some snooty little redhead? He thinks he can just tell me he __**loves **__me and then rub this chick in my face? No! Sam Puckett doesn't take that from __**anybody**__, not even him!_

Sam stopped facing, anger still coursing through her veins.

She knew she could get back at Freddie. It wouldn't be that hard. She could easily beat him up in three seconds flat, or…or, she could sabotage whatever relationship it was that he had with that Annabelle chick.

Sam knew she was a mastermind when it came to this sort of thing. All she'd have to do was mess up a few dates, get them to start fighting and _bam_, Annabelle would be out of the picture, as she should be.

It would be _so _easy.

And then, as the gears in Sam's brain began turning, an image came to her mind…

_Freddie would be crushed if I did that to him, _Sam thought slowly. _He-He'd probably hate me…Especially if he really likes this girl._

"I can't do that do him," Sam said softly, the anger in her subsiding. "I-I'd lose him as a friend too then."

And suddenly a flood of realization hit her.

This was how it was going to be now. Freddie was over her, that much was clear. There was no use getting angry or trying to sabotage him.

But while there was no way to change the fact that Freddie seemed to have fallen out of love with her…that didn't mean she still didn't love him.

And if she loved him…why would she want to hurt him like that?

Just then she heard the front door open and Freddie himself walked in.

"Oh, um, hey," Freddie said, clearly surprised to see her there. "I-I thought maybe Carly and Spencer were back."

"No," Sam said heavily, turning her back towards him. "They're spending the night at their cousins, Spencer's car broke down."

"Ah," Freddie said.

He was silent for a moment before her cleared his throat. "Sam? About-About today-"

"How was the movie?" Sam asked, slowly turning back towards him. "Was it any good?"

"Um, yeah, it-it was good," Freddie said. "But, um…about Annabelle-"

"She seems nice," Sam said softly. "Where'd you meet her?"

"My-My mom works with her mom," Freddie replied.

Sam nodded. "Well then…at least you know your mom will approve of her."

"Sam," Freddie sighed, stepping closer to her. "Are-Are you okay with me seeing her?"

Sam shrugged. "Doesn't matter. You can't break up with a girl you like because someone's not okay with her."

"Yeah, but…you know, we-we used-"

"Yes, Freddie, we dated," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "And then we broke up. But if nobody started dating again after a break-up, what would happen?"

"But it's not weird for you?" Freddie asked.

"Do you really like her?" Sam asked, not daring to look at him.

"We just started going out-"

"But do you like her?" Sam asked again.

Freddie sighed. "Yeah," he said gently. "I really like her."

"Well then," Sam said simply. "I think it would be stupid if you stopped seeing her."

"And you'll be okay?"

Sam looked up into his eyes, which were full of concern.

She gave him a small smile. "I'll be fine."

….

Several days had passed since Sam and Freddie's talk. Sam didn't bring it up again, and neither did Freddie.

And though Sam had vowed not to step in the way of his and Annabelle's relationship, she did have to bite her tongue and clench her fists once and awhile when he would bring her around.

"Alright, who's ready for a little iCarly?" Sam asked, walking into the Shay's apartment.

"We're getting ready up in the studio," Freddie said, and Sam's heart did the smallest of drops when she saw Annabelle in the kitchen with him. "Carly's just making a few last edits."

"Oh," Sam nodded. "Okay."

"I'm making some iced tea," Annabelle smiled. "Do you want any?"

"No, I'm good," Sam said quickly.

"Hang on, Carly just texted me, she needs me to set up the green screen," Freddie said, looking at his phone. He turned to Annabelle. "Would you mind bringing my iced tea upstairs when you're finished?"

"No problem," Annabelle said. "Go help Carly."

Sam watched Freddie run upstairs as she headed into the kitchen to grab a snack.

"You sure you don't want any iced tea?" Annabelle asked her as she took an orange from the fridge. "I don't mean to brag, but I make it _really _good."

_I don't want __**anything **__from you_, Sam thought. But she used every ounce of her self control to pull a smile onto her face.

"No thanks, I'm actually not that thirsty."

"Okay," Annabelle nodded as she set a few glasses on a tray to bring upstairs. "Well, I'll save you a glass if you change your mind."

Sam watched as she picked up the tray and started towards the stairs.

"Annabelle!" Sam suddenly said.

Annabelle turned around. "Yeah?"

Sam had so many things she wanted to say to this girl.

_How dare you be dating Freddie?_

_Why do you think you can just invite yourself over here to watch us do iCarly?_

_Why did you have to come into the picture in the first place?_

But she thought of Freddie, and she swallowed all those words.

"Freddie-Freddie really loves lemon in his iced tea," Sam told her. "It's his favorite."

"Oh," Annabelle said. "Well then maybe I should add some to his?"

_Well aren't you smart_? Sam thought, internally rolling her eyes. _I thought I was telling you to add an elephant to the drink!_

"Yeah, that's a good idea," Sam said carefully. "I'll help you out."


	462. Chapter 462

_Neglect_

"Well, Sam might be in detention right now, but on the positive side, this is the first time she's been in all month," Freddie said as him and Carly walked into the Shay's apartment.

"Yeah, that's a record for her," Carly agreed. "And she'll be out in time for you two to watch that movie you wanted on the nature channel about the squirrels."

"I've been looking forward to that for weeks," Freddie grinned.

"Um, why?" Carly chuckled.

"Because it seems that whenever Sam and I go out to the park to just sit or have a picnic or whatever, we get surrounded by squirrels!" Freddie explained. "So I suggested that we watch this movie to see if we can figure out why they're so attracted to us so our dates can stop being ruined."

"Aw, that _is _cute," Carly smiled. "Weird…but cute."

"I also managed to sneak some real, unhealthy, full of sugar cupcakes into my place," Freddie said. "Chocolate cream, Sam's favorite."

"Your mom would flip if she knew you got those," Carly commented.

"Eh, it's worth it," Freddie shrugged. "It's for Sam."

….

Later that evening, Carly was sitting in her living room, working on a homework assignment. Spencer was hanging out with Socko at the junkyard and she figured Sam and Freddie were still across the hall at Freddie's, so it looked like she had the evening alone.

Just then, though, the apartment door opened up and Freddie walked in, carrying a box of cupcakes.

"Hey," he said. "Eat some of these cupcakes. I need to get rid of them before my mom comes home in a few hours."

"You mean Sam didn't inhale that whole box?" Carly smirked, helping herself to a cupcake.

"Nah, Sam couldn't make it," Freddie sighed.

"Aw, why not?" Carly frowned. "I thought you guys were watching that squirrel movie."

"So did I, but she called me a little while ago and told me she couldn't make it," Freddie explained. "Apparently one guy from her little detention crew had ring-side tickets to some boxing match so she asked if we could reschedule. I'm recording the movie now and we'll just watch it some other time."

"Oh, well, I'm sorry," Carly said. "I know you were looking forward to spending the night with her."

"It's fine," Freddie shrugged. "She's been wanting to go to a boxing match for months. Getting cupcakes past my mom is one thing, but if she ever found out I went somewhere where guys are paid to beat each other up, she'd never let me leave the apartment again."

"True," Carly agreed. "Well, I guess it's good Sam got it out of her system then. Although she did miss out on some _delicious _cupcakes. How can your mom ban something so good?"

"Please, my mom bans anything that could bring joy to people," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Anyway, I'll just leave these here. Can you try and save at least a few for Sam?"

"Sure," Carly nodded. "I'm sure she'll appreciate that."

…..

The next day at school, Carly stood by her and Sam's locker, waiting for her best friend. Sure enough, a few moments later, Sam came around the corner with a guy Carly recognized as a regular in after-school detention.

"Hey, Carls," Sam said brightly. "You know Joe, right?"

"Um…sure," Carly nodded. "Hi there, Joe."

"'Sup?" Joe replied.

"Joe and I were just talking about the _amazing _boxing match that him and I went to last night," Sam said. "It was crazy!"

"Yeah, Freddie mentioned you were going," Carly said. "I'm glad you had fun."

"We're gonna go see that other match tonight too, right?" Joe said to Sam. "I heard they're bringing in a new guy who can hit so hard he can take out at least five teeth a punch!"

"That's so cool!" Sam grinned. "We're definitely gonna go."

"Um, Sam?" Carly said. "I thought you and Freddie usually got tacos at El Taco Guapo on Wednesday nights."

"Oh," Sam frowned. "Yeah…well, I-I'm sure Freddie won't mind rescheduling. He was cool last night when I went to the match."

"But this is going to be twice in a row you've canceled on hi," Carly pointed out.

"Well, um…" Sam said slowly as Freddie himself came around the corner.

"Hey!" he said brightly, giving Sam a quick kiss. "I missed you last night. Did you have a good time at the match?"

"Yeah, it was great," Sam replied.

"There was so much punching; it was the best!" Joe said excitedly.

"Oh…hey there Joe," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Um, anyway, baby?" Sam said. "I know tonight we usually go and get tacos, but, um, there's another match tonight and it's supposed to be _really _insane. Would you mind if maybe we, um, skipped El Taco Guapo tonight so I could go with Joe? You should see the seats he has; you can see all the action!"

"Oh," Freddie said. "Well, um…yeah. Sure. We get tacos every week, you'll probably never get another chance to see this match. Have fun tonight."

"Thanks, you're the best!" Sam smiled, giving him another kiss.

…..

A few days later, Carly and Spencer were sitting in the living room watching T.V.

"You know, I don't think I get the whole point of this show," Spencer said. "They just lock all these celebrities in a house and don't let them leave? Isn't that kidnapping?"

"No," Carly said. "It's not kidnapping if it's on national T.V."

"But Ryan Seacrest seems pretty miserable," Spencer pointed out. "I think they should let him out of the house."

"Nah, if they let him out then there won't be anymore drama between Jessica Simpson and that chick from all the peanut butter commercials," Carly said. "They'll keep him on for awhile."

"Yeah but-"

Spencer was interrupted, though, by the front door slamming open and Freddie running in excitedly.

"Guess what?" he exclaimed.

"What?" Carly asked, muting the television. "Did your mom agree to let you start wearing open-toed shoes?"

"Nope," Freddie said, still beaming. "I just got accepted to be an intern at the Pear Store this summer! For three months they're going to teach me all about the latest Pear technology and at the end, they'll even let me fly to headquarters for two days to meet the Pear president!"

"Oh my God! That's amazing!" Carly grinned, hugging him. "I forgot today was the day you found out about that!"

"Congratulations," Spencer said, high-fiving him. "Hey, see if you can see if they can make some nice fire retardant Pear phone cases."

"Hey, where's Sam?" Carly frowned. "I thought you wanted her there when you got the decision."

"Yeah, but, um, she-she's at some MMA exhibit," Freddie mumbled. "With Joe. I-I called her though and she said she'd try and get here as fast as she can."

"Oh…" Carly frowned, noticing Freddie's sad expression. "Well, um, I'll sure she'll be here any minute."

"Yeah," Freddie said, pulling a smile on his face. "She will."

…..

It was close to four hours later when Sam finally did arrive, though.

"Hey!" she said, letting herself into the apartment with a large smoothie in hand. "Congratulations, baby!"

"Thanks," Freddie smiled as she wrapped her arms around him.

"Here, I got you this," Sam said, handing him the smoothie. "Blueberry Splat; your favorite! And I only took five sips of it! The rest is all yours."

"Aw, you've never left me more than half a smoothie before," Freddie chuckled.

Carly got to her feet and headed over to Sam. "Hey, Sam? Do you think you could come upstairs with me really quick? I, um, need some help with something."

"Sure," Sam nodded, giving Freddie a quick kiss. "Seriously, good job, Fredward."

Sam followed Carly up to her room.

"Alright, what do you need help with?" Sam asked. "This isn't another lip-gloss emergency, is it?"

"Sam," Carly said seriously. "Why have you been spending so much time with Joe lately?"

"Huh?" Sam frowned. "What do you mean? I'm not spending that much time with him."

"You kind of are," Carly nodded. "You go to all these fights with him, you hang out after detention with him…I-I think it's starting to hurt Freddie a little."

"What? Why?" Sam said.

"Because," Carly explained. "It's like you're neglecting _him_. You're canceling your dates with him, you change your plans with him, and today Freddie really wanted you to be there when he found out the news about this internship and you were busy with Joe again."

"But-I-Joe's just a friend," Sam said. "I've known him for years; we've had detention together since the ninth grade. Besides, he _has _a girlfriend. She's just in Juvie right now…"

"I don't think Freddie thinks you're interested in this Joe guy," Carly said. "He _does_ know how much you love him. But think about it, how would you feel if Freddie all of the sudden wanted to spend all his with some new girl. Even if he wasn't romantically interested in her, wouldn't it be kind of weird that he seemed to put spending time with her above spending time with you, his girlfriend?"

Sam didn't reply.

"I-I know you probably didn't mean to hurt Freddie," Carly said gently. "But maybe it would be nice if you started telling _Joe _you can't do some things with him, instead of Freddie."

"I wouldn't rather spend time with Joe than Freddie," Sam said softly.

"I know, but…_show _Freddie that," Carly told her. "It will make him feel a lot better."

Sam nodded. "Joe and I were supposed to go and throw eggs at old people in the mall parking lot tonight, but-but I think I want to stay here and celebrate with Freddie."

"He'll like that," Carly smiled. "Why don't you go take him and do something he wants to do?"

"He-He has been saying he wants to go to that new museum that opened up," Sam said thoughtfully. "I can take him out there…I guess this internship's big enough for me to sufferer through a million boring exhibits."

"That's the spirit," Carly chuckled.

So the girls headed back downstairs where Freddie was still sipping his smoothie.

"Okay, Fredwardo, grab your jacket," Sam said, taking his hand. "We're going out to celebrate."

"Really?" Freddie said.

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "And since you went and got such an impressive, but totally nerdy, internship, we're gonna go to the museum."

"The museum?" Freddie repeated. "You mean I can actually see the new Ancient Egypt exhibit?"

"Yeah," Sam said, kissing him. "Let's go. Tonight is _your _night."


	463. Chapter 463

**AN-This chapter is a sequel to chapter 456, where Sam beats up the guy who gave iCarly a virus when Freddie was in trouble, even after he said she didn't care about him.**

**Also, I'm loving all the requests I've been getting! If you have any at all, please send them to me!**

…

_Carrot_

Carly nervously paced back in forth in her kitchen, nibbling on carrots covered in whipped cream; her favorite snack for when she was feeling anxious.

"Whoa, what's up with you?" Spencer asked, coming out of his bedroom.

"Freddie's meeting up with the guy who gave our site a virus today," Carly explained. "And I'm just worried that this guy is gonna wind up being a little rougher than Freddie suspects."

"Wait…Freddie went to go meet some weird guy on the Internet by himself?" Spencer frowned. "That's really dangerous! Why would he do something like that?"

"He says that computer nerds like them have some sort of mutual respect for each other," Carly sighed. "I just hope he's right."

And then, right on cue, Freddie opened the door and let himself in.

"Are you okay?" Carly asked at once, rushing over to him. "Did you get that guy to fix our site?"

"I'm fine, Carls," Freddie assured her. "And iCarly is virus-free once again."

"That's great!" Carly smiled. "I was pretty worried, actually, that the guy was gonna give you a hard time. I guess you were right about him, though."

"Er, actually…I was wrong. He-He was sort of a jerk," Freddie explained. "He didn't want to meet up with me to fix the virus. He just wanted to give me a hard time."

"But-But you said the virus was gone now," Carly pointed out.

"It is," Freddie said. "But, well…that's only because Sam showed up and _made _the guy tell me how to get rid of it."

"Sam showed up?" Carly said, surprised.

"I know, weird," Freddie nodded. "But the important thing is iCarly is now up and running."

"So where is Sam?" Carly asked. "Did she come over with you? Now that iCarly is back up, we should start making up for lost time and get some new stuff up for our viewers."

Freddie's face suddenly fell. "No, she didn't come over here with me…actually, she seemed kind of…off after everything."  
"Off?" Carly repeated.

"Yeah," Freddie said. "You see, the guy was stupid enough to push Sam before she gave the guy what he deserved. And so after he ran out crying, I asked her if she was okay and told her how great she was with the jerk, and she said…she told me not to pretend I cared about her when I seemed so sure she didn't care about me."

Carly gave him a strange look. "She said that?"

"Uh-huh," Freddie nodded. "Is everything okay with her? Do you know what she meant by that?"

"No," Carly said. "But I'll talk to her tonight and see if I can get anything out of her. In the meantime, we need to get her and Gibby over here so we can start filming and-"

Before she could finish her sentence, though, the front door opened again and Sam came in.

"Hey," she said brightly to Carly, not even glancing in Freddie's direction.

"Perfect timing, I was just about to text you," Carly said.

"Yeah, I figured we'd be doing some iCarly chiz now that we can broadcast again," Sam said. "I just saw Gib down in the lobby. He was doing something to Lewbert's potted cactus, but then he said he'd be right up."

"What was he doing?" Carly frowned.  
"I did _not _want to know."

"Well, I'm gonna go grab that box of props out of my room, and you two can meet me in the studio," Carly said. "There's ham in the fridge, Sam."

"On it!" Sam replied, starting towards the fridge as Carly headed upstairs.

Freddie watched her, confused by her change in behavior since they left the diner.

"Hey," Freddie said as Sam grabbed the plate of ham from the fridge. "Are you okay?"

"Why wouldn't I be okay?" Sam asked simply, not even bothering to look up at him.

"Well because you seemed upset when you left the diner," Freddie said. "How's your arm? My mom has that huge first aid kit across the hall if you need it."

"I don't," Sam said. "It was barely a scratch."

"It was bleeding pretty badly."

"I'm fine!" Sam snapped.

"Okay, _what _is with you?" Freddie asked.

Sam shook her head. "Nothing," she mumbled as she grabbed the ham plate and headed upstairs without saying another word to him.

…..

The teens spent the entire afternoon filming for their web show. And though Sam seemed just as energetic and spunky as she always did for iCarly, Freddie noticed that whenever she would look at him, her eyes would grow cold.

_What's going on? _Freddie asked himself as he continued to film the girls. _Sam's never exactly Mother Teresa around me, but this is kind of harsh, even for __**her**__._

"Alright, well I think we have enough done for tonight," Carly said as her and Sam finished their latest installment of the Idiot Farm Girl. "I think by tomorrow night we should be able to do the show. We'll have to do some serious tweeting since it won't be on our normal night, but I think we owe it to our fans. You guys all good with that?"

"Yeah, I can do the show tomorrow," Sam nodded.

"Works for me," Freddie said.

"Fine," Gibby sighed. "I guess this will be another week I don't get to go to my yoga class!"

"Carly!" the suddenly heard Spencer yell from downstairs. "Carly! I need help!"

"With what?" Carly called down.

"I'm stuck to the table again!"

"Ugh!" Carly moaned, rolling her eyes. "I swear, the dude can get stuck to _anything_. I better help him up."

"You need help?" Freddie asked.

"Nah, I've done this _way _too many times before," Carly said. "All I need is some cooking oil and a spatula."

"Poor spatula," Sam cringed.

"Well, since I'm missing yoga, I better go home and call my carpool to tell them I can't make it," Gibby said, following Carly out of the studio. "You know…I really could've used some inner peace this week. My mom told Guppy he didn't have to take his 'special vitamins' anymore and now the kid's jumping all over the place!"

Once him and Carly left, Sam and Freddie were left alone.

"We got some great footage today," Freddie said, attempting to start up a conversation. "I'm sure it will make up for us being off the web for so long."

"Yeah…real funny stuff," Sam said coolly, looking down at her phone.

"Hey, while Carly unsticks Spencer, why don't we run down to the Groovy Smoothie and grab some smoothies to celebrate?" Freddie asked. "My treat. You did sort of get that guy to tell me how to get rid of the virus, after all."  
"No thanks," Sam said. "I don't want a smoothie."

Freddie frowned. "You don't want a _free _smoothie?"

"Nope," Sam replied.

"Okay, Puckett, that's it!" Freddie said, setting his camera down as he stepped over to her. "Something's clearly going on! I mean you blow me off at the diner, you barely even talked to me all during rehearsal and now you're refusing smoothies? Are you mad at me or something?"

"I'm not mad at you," Sam said simply. "You keep saying I don't care about you, so this is it. This is me not caring about you."

"Huh?" Freddie said, confused. "What do you mean?"

"I mean if you're gonna keep thinking that after everything, after seven years of friendship and even a month of us _dating _that I don't care about you, then I'm not gonna waste my time caring at all," Sam said firmly. She turned to leave, but Freddie stopped her.

"Sam, wait, I-Why do you think I don't think you care about me?" Freddie asked.

"You've said it," Sam replied. "A _lot_. Even just the other day, you said I wouldn't have cared if you got beaten up by that virus guy! You said it when we were trapped at Nora's house, too! And you say it when we're just hanging out, or when we're doing iCarly, or-or whenever!"  
Freddie blinked. "But-But Sam," he said softly. "I-I don't actually mean it when I say that. I'm just saying things in the heat of the moment! You know people say things they don't mean all the time."

"Do they?" Sam said, looking at her feet. "So was what you said that night in the elevator…when you said you love me…was that just in the heat of the moment too?"

"No!" Freddie said at once. "No, I-I meant _that_. But-"

"How am I supposed to know what you mean and what you don't mean then?" Sam asked softly.

And with that, she left the studio, and Freddie was too flabbergasted by what she had said to even stop her.


	464. Chapter 464

_Toast_

"Hey mom?" sixteen-year old Ashton frowned, looking up at her mother as her and Clarissa worked on their homework on the kitchen table. "What are you doing?"

"What do you mean?" Sam asked, placing several pieces of bread into the toaster oven. "What's it look like I'm doing? I'm making toast!"

"Yes…why?"

"Your dad and I have this little bet going," Sam explained.

"Oh jeez," Ashton sighed, knowing all too well how this was most likely going to end.

"What sort of bet involves toast?" Clarissa asked.

"Clarissa!" Ashton hissed. "Haven't you been around here long enough to know to never ask about _what _kind of stuff my parents come up with?"

"I'm glad you asked, Clarissa," Sam smiled, ignoring her daughter's comment. "You see, Freddie claims that those new flowers he had planted out in our front yard are gonna '_beautify our home'_ and '_liven up the neighborhood_', but _I _say they're just gonna attract a bunch of bugs and birds and things. So we agreed that by the end of the week, if no pests are attracted to them, I have to spend an afternoon at the Pear Store with him. But if we do get a bunch of pests in our yard, _he _has to massage my feet for the rest of the month."

"I still don't get what the toast is for," Clarissa said.

"Oh, I'm gonna crush all this up and sprinkle the crumbs all around the flowers tonight," Sam replied.

"But wouldn't that _make _bugs and birds come into your yard?"

"Exactly," Sam grinned. "My feet are gonna feel so nice by the end of this month…"

"You see what I have to put up with?" Ashton said, rolling her eyes. "You have it so easy…your parents are _normal._"

"Hey Ash?" Emma said, coming into the kitchen. "Is it cool if I take our car tonight? Quincy and I are going out and his car has a flat."

"Yeah, I wasn't going out anyway," Ashton nodded.

"Why not?" Sam asked. "It's Saturday night."

"Yeah, but we have a huge calculus test coming up, so Clarissa and I are staying in this weekend to study," Ashton replied.

"I thought your calculus test wasn't until next week," Sam said.

"I know, we're already behind my ten-day exam prep strategy, so we need to catch up!" Ashton said.

Sam smirked. "Did you get anything from my genes besides your looks?"

"She just wants to get the highest grade in the class," Clarissa said.

"Yeah," Ashton nodded. "That stupid nerd Alex McDougle thinks he's smarter than me just because he got one point higher on our last exam. But this time I'm gonna destroy him so I can rub it in his stupid face."

"Aw, there it is," Sam chuckled. She turned to Emma. "Where are you and Quincy going?"

"That cool new sushi restaurant," Emma said. "They let your own fish out of this giant aquarium and they make your sushi from it!"

"Wouldn't it be kind of sad to eat a fish you've seen swimming around all happy?" Clarissa pointed out.

"Well I'm not gonna _name_ it," Emma said. Just then, she let out a soft wince and grabbed her side.

"You okay?" Sam asked, concerned.

"Yeah," Emma said, quickly recovering. "I think I just got bruised yesterday during my soccer game."

"Are you sure?" Sam asked. "Want me to take a look at it?"

"Nah, I can handle a little pain, mom," Emma said.

"Well…okay," Sam said. "But if it's still hurting you tomorrow, I'm taking you to the doctor to have it looked at."

"Oh, Emma, good, you didn't leave yet," Freddie said, joining the four in the kitchen. "Tonight when you go to Quincy's, try and look around and see if you can find my Robots vs. Cowboys DVD. Gibby borrowed it and _claimed_ he gave it back, but I think he's hoarding it over there somewhere and-Hey! Sam, what are you doing?"

"Nothing," Sam said, quickly stepping in front of the toast.

"You're making toast!" Freddie exclaimed. "I _knew _it! You're trying to sabotage my flowers so you won't have to go to the Pear Store with me!"

"No!" Sam scoffed. "I'm just really hungry for toast!"

"Saboteur!"

"I don't even know what that means!"

"Well you know what?" Freddie said firmly. "I'm gonna sit right here and _watch_ you eat every last piece of toast you have there!"

"You're such a _nub_!"

"-And I'm out of here," Emma said, rolling her eyes at her parents as she headed out of the house.

…

"I've never had sushi before," Quincy said as him and Emma sat in their booth at the restaurant.

"Really?" Emma said, trying to ignore the pain in her side that seemed to have intensified since she left her house. "I thought your dad loved the stuff."

"He does, but he has this really weird way of eating it that creeps me out," Quincy said, shuddering. "But I figured this place was too cool for me not to give it a try."

"Yeah, well you should try some of the special soy sauce," Emma said, trying to sit up straight even though she was now beginning to feel very nauseous and her head was hurting in addition to the pain that was shooting through her side. "I-I heard it's really good."

"Em, are you okay?" Quincy asked, noticing something very off with his girlfriend.

"Yeah, I'm fine!" Emma said, though she felt far from it. "I-I'm still just a little bruised up from my soccer game yesterday."

"Are you sure?" Quincy frowned. "You seem sort of pale…that doesn't seem like it would be from your soccer game."

"Stop insulting my complexion and can we just enjoy our sushi?" Emma snapped.

"Okay, okay," Quincy said quickly. "So anyway, my parents are going to one of my mom's old modeling friend's parties tomorrow and Huey and Kirby both have school projects they're working on at the library, so my place is gonna be empty. I was thinking you and I could hang out and maybe chill out and watch movies all day. And you know, _not _watch the movie at times…"

"Yeah, that sounds fun," Emma nodded. "We can-Ow!"

She suddenly grabbed her side, unable to stifle a cry at the pain that was now radiating there.

"Okay, something's wrong," Quincy said firmly, sliding over closer to her. "Emma, what's hurting you?"

"My-My side," Emma said, no longer able to hide the pain she was in. "I think it's just bruised from soccer, like I told you."

"Emma, if it was just a bruise you wouldn't be hurting like this," Quincy said. "Besides, did you even hit your side yesterday? I was watching your game and I thought the only place you got hurt was your arm when some girl shoved into you."

"Well what else could this be from?" Emma pointed out.

"Wait a minute…" Quincy said slowly. "Your side has been hurting you since yesterday?"

"Uh-huh," Emma nodded, still wincing.

"And it's only that side? Your other side feels fine?"

"Yes!" Emma gasped.

Quincy gently placed a hand on her forehead. "You have a fever, Em."

"Well that's _fantastic_!" Emma groaned. "Look, I'll be fine. I just want to eat some sushi and have a fun night tonight, okay?"

"No, Emma, we're going to the hospital," Quincy said, getting to his feet and taking Emma's hand to help her up as well.

"What? No! That's stupid!" Emma said. "I told you, I'll be-"

"You will _not _be fine, you have appendicitis!" Quincy cut her off. "We need to get you to the emergency room so that they can take out your appendix before you get sicker."

"Take out my appendix?" Emma repeated, her eyes growing wide. "Are you _crazy_? Nobody's cutting anything out of me!"

"Baby, if they don't take out your appendix, you're going to get really sick," Quincy told her. "Give me your car keys. I'll drive to the hospital and I'll have your parents meet us there."

"I _hate _hospitals!" Emma said, her voice shaking.

"I know," Quincy said softly as he helped her out of the restaurant. "But I'll stay with you as long as I can. And-And you won't even be awake when they take your appendix out, so you won't feel a thing!"

"They knock me out?!"

"Just-Just for a little bit," Quincy said. "Trust me, Emma, you'll be okay."

He gave her hand a reassuring squeeze.

"Will you be there when I wake up?" Emma asked, clutching her side again.

"I promise, I'll be right there," Quincy nodded.

…

"Over here!" Quincy said in the hospital waiting room as he saw Sam and Freddie rush in.

"How is she?" Freddie asked at once.

"She's getting her appendix out right now," Quincy told them. "They said she should be fine. It's a pretty quick procedure."

"I _knew _she wasn't okay," Sam said, shaking her head. "I should've made her stay home."

"It's not your fault," Freddie told her. "She seemed fine when she left. And she's gonna be okay. Ashton had her appendix out when she was nine, and you had yours out when you around this age."

He turned back to Quincy. "Thanks for calling us, Quince. And thanks for getting Emma here too."

"No problem," Quincy said. "I didn't even have to pay for parking; I still had my voucher from when I had to drive my dad here a couple days ago because he sprained his ankle trying to act out some scene from a robot and cowboy movie."

"I _knew _Gibby still had my DVD!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Excuse me," a nurse interrupted, coming over to Sam and Freddie. "Are you Emma Benson's parents?"

"Yeah," Sam said. "Is she okay? Did anything happen?"

"Your daughter's fine," the nurse assured her. "The surgery went very well and Emma's appendix was removed without a problem. She's still under anesthesia, but she should be waking up within the hour."

"Can we go in and sit with her?" Freddie asked.

"Of course," the nurse nodded. "She's in room 513."

"Um, would-would you guys mind if I came up with you?" Quincy asked. "I sort of promised Emma I'd be there when she woke up."

Freddie smiled. "Yeah, come on up, Quincy."

…

"Mmm," Emma mumbled sleepily as she slowly opened her eyes about an hour later.

"Hey sweetie," Sam said, stroking the top of her head. "How you feeling?"

"Tired," Emma said, sitting up. "Am I in the hospital?"

"Yup, and you're officially appendix-free," Freddie told her. "Congratulations."

"See," Quincy said, sitting down at the foot of her bed, giving her a small smile. "I told you you'd be fine."

"Yeah, yeah," Emma said, rolling her eyes. "I just wish I could've waited until _after _I got to eat some sushi before my appendix decided it had to come out. I'm starving."

"The doctor said you had to wait an hour before you ate anything," Sam told her. "But your dad and I are gonna go pick you up some food. The sushi place is closed right now, but would a burger and fries hit the spot?"

"It always does," Emma smirked.

"Alright, we'll be back soon," Freddie said, kissing the top of Emma's head. "Quincy will keep you company."

Quincy waited until Sam and Freddie had left before scooting closer to Emma. "You feel any different without an appendix?"

"Maybe a little," Emma chuckled. She looked down at her lap. "Sorry I ruined our date night."

"Em, you didn't ruin our date night," Quincy said, rolling his eyes. "I'm just glad you're not in pain anymore."

Emma's cheeks blushed. "I could've handled the pain…it-it didn't hurt that much."  
"You were practically in tears," Quincy said.

"No I wasn't!"

"If you say so," Quincy said, leaning down to kiss her. "I'm just glad you're okay now, though. I love you too much to see you hurt."

Emma smiled up at him. "I love you too…Hey, what's in that jar over there?"  
"Oh, I think that's your appendix," Quincy cringed. "That's so gross. Why would they just leave that there?"

"It's so cool!" Emma exclaimed. "Bring it over here so I can see it!"

"No! I don't want to touch it!"

"It's in a _jar_!"

"I don't care, it's still gross!" Quincy said. "There's no way I'm touching that thing."

Emma raised an eyebrow. "Dude…"

"Fine!" Quincy conceded, grabbing the jar and handing it to his girlfriend, trying not to gag. "Here!"

"Thank you, Quincy," Emma said sweetly. "I love you even more now. Hey, look! It jiggles when I shake it!"


	465. Chapter 465

_Distinction_

Freddie Benson happily sat on his couch, free from the distinct plastic cover he was so used to, his feet propped up on his coffee table, something that would've resulted in his mother exploding at him back when he lived with her.

Freddie had moved out of his mother's home a few months ago, and he was loving every minute of having his own place. He loved the freedom to come and go without having to answer at least five dozen questions even though, as he had constantly told his mother, he was an adult now. He loved not having to sign a contract ever night before getting in the shower saying he 'double pooed' and he loved being able to have normal, edible foods in his kitchen, having all his television channels unlocked and, well, everything.

Just then, he heard a knock at his door, and he quickly jumped to his feet.

There was one thing that he loved most of all about having his own place, and it looked like she had just arrived.

Sure enough, when Freddie opened the door, Sam was standing outside, looking stunning as usual

"Hey," he smiled, letting her into the apartment.

"Hey," she replied, wasting no time in pressing her lips to his.

_I'm never gonna get tired of being able to do this without having to be worried about being sprayed with disinfectant_, Freddie thought to himself as he continued to kiss Sam.

It really was a great life here.

"So what's the plan for tonight?" Freddie asked when the couple finally pulled apart.

"I dunno," Sam shrugged. "I figured we'd just stay in and do whatever."

"Okay," Freddie agreed. "I'll order us a pizza and we can just relax in front of the T.V."

"Sounds like the perfect night," Sam chuckled, kissing him again. "Let me just go change out of these clothes. I came from work and if we're gonna laze around all night, I need to be dressed for the part. My sweats were around here somewhere…"

"They're in my room, next to your hair dryer," Freddie told her.

"Oh yeah, be back in a sec," Sam said, heading back to the bedroom.

Ever since Freddie had gotten his own place, Sam had practically made the apartment her own too. His bathroom was filled with her shampoos and his counter was littered with random tubes of make-up. His drawers had at least half her wardrobe in them and his living room had various MMA magazines strewn about it.

But strangely enough, this didn't bother Freddie in the slightest. Even when he would almost trip on one of Sam's boots getting up to get a drink in the middle of the night, he sort of liked how Sam seemed to be so comfortable in his home.

"I see you got some new sheets on your bed," Sam said, returning to the room, now wearing her favorite sweatpants and one of his old t-shirts that reached her knees. "Finally outgrow your Proton Cruiser ones?"

"I figured now that I have my own place, I needed some more adult-appropriate sheets," Freddie said. "But don't worry, I still have the Proton Cruiser ones to use too."

"Once a nub, always a nub," Sam said, rolling her eyes as she wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him once again. "So…wanna break in those new sheets later?"

"Yes please," Freddie laughed. "So does that mean you're sleeping over?"

"The sweatpants are on, baby, I'm staying," Sam said firmly.

"Good," Freddie said, hugging her tightly.

"Hey, it's almost seven," Sam said, looking at the clock on the wall. "The finale of _Battle of the Game Show Hosts _is on!"

"Oh, awesome!" Freddie said as the couple quickly sat down on the couch and turned on their favorite show. "I think Alex Trebeck is really gonna give it to Bob Barker during the Wheel of Misfortune tournament."

"Oh man, I've been thinking about that all day!" Sam said excitedly, curling up on Freddie's lap. "How awesome would it be to see those two fight?"

"Extremely awesome," Freddie agreed.

As the two sat and watched their show, Freddie marveled at how unbelievable this sensation still was; being able to hold Sam in his arms and exchange kisses during commercials, uninterrupted by anyone. Even when they would go over to her and Carly's shared apartment, they still had to deal with Carly walking in on them from time to time.

When the show finally ended, Freddie turned off the T.V., and Sam snuggled closer to him, resting her head on his chest. "Well…nobody saw Regis Philbin coming from behind and winning that whole thing. I never knew he could be so vicious."

"Yeah, poor Pat, I hope his shoulder gets better soon," Freddie nodded. "Hey, I have a surprise…"

"Oh…is it edible?" Sam asked as Freddie headed into the kitchen.

"Yes, baby, it's edible," Freddie smiled, rolling his eyes.

He opened the fridge and grabbed a large white box. "I picked these up after work today for us to have."

"You didn't even know I was coming over here tonight," Sam pointed out.

Freddie laughed. "I figured the odds were on my side. You spend at least four or five nights a week here."

"True," Sam said as Freddie sat back down and opened the box to reveal a dozen chocolate covered strawberries.

"Whoa! I love chocolate covered strawberries!" Sam said, grabbing two in her hand.

"You like chocolate covered anything," Freddie reminded her, taking a strawberry for himself and taking a bite.

"Yes I do," Sam said proudly. She looked over at her boyfriend. "Aw, baby. You have a little chocolate on your face."

"I do?"

"Yeah, here, I'll get it for you," Sam said, leaning over and quickly connecting her lips to his.

After several minutes, the couple broke apart, both gasping for breath.

"There was no chocolate on my face, was there?" Freddie smirked.

"You'll never know," Sam said simply.

"Sam Puckett," Freddie said, shaking his head. "That is probably the oldest, _cheesiest_ move in the book…I'm impressed."

"Well when you have a boyfriend who lives for that sort of stuff, you pick up a few things," Sam shrugged, smiling as Freddie shifted her onto his lap. "God…I love this."

"What?" Freddie asked.

"You having your own place," she said. "It's so much nicer not having to worry about Carly or your mom bursting in."

"Yeah, it is," Freddie nodded. "Remember that time a few months ago when my mom came home from work early and caught us making out on her couch?"

"Oh yeah…she flipped," Sam chuckled. "She made you take five tick baths that night. I guess she thinks I give you ticks or something."

"Nah, you're completely tick free," Freddie smiled.

"Thank you," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "But that wasn't nearly as bad as the other night when you and I were over at my place and Carly burst into my bedroom just as were about to-"

"Oh God," Freddie mumbled. "I don't think I've ever been more humiliated. I'll never be able to look Carly in the eye again."

"Eh, it _was_ super awkward, but Carly knows all couples do it," Sam shrugged. "So she saw us watching old Ashley Blake movies…the cable was out and those were the only DVDs we could find!"

"Well, at least here we can watch anything we want and nobody's gonna burst in," Freddie smiled.

"Yup," Sam grinned, kissing him again. "This is the best."

"Hey, um, Sam?" Freddie said slowly when the broke apart. "I-I've actually been meaning to bring something up to you. About me having my own place now and stuff…"

Sam's face suddenly fell. "Oh…yeah, I guess I know what this is about then."

"You do?" Freddie said.

"Yeah, I-I'm sorry I've sort left all my junk here lately," Sam sighed. "I-I can bring some stuff back to my place tomorrow."

"What? No!" Freddie said quickly. "Sam, I don't care that your stuff is here. In fact…I sort of like it. It makes this place feel more homey."  
"Really?" Sam frowned. "You don't care that I have a bunch of junk in your bathroom or that your fridge is filled with my snacks?"

"No," Freddie said. "In fact…what I was _going _to say…how would you feel about maybe moving in here with me?"

Sam blinked. "You want me to move in here?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "We've been dating for awhile now, after all."

"I know," Sam said slowly. "But isn't this like, a huge step?"

"Sure," Freddie agreed. "But you practically live here now anyway, and I love it!"

"Yeah, I love it too," Sam said. "But I've always still had my own place."

"Look, if you don't feel ready for this, that's fine," Freddie told her. "I really enjoy having you here all the time, but if you think we should maybe hold off on this, than we will."  
Sam looked up at him. "You know what? I want to do it."

"You-You do?"

"Yeah," Sam replied. "I love you…Moving in here just feels so-so-"

"Right?" Freddie finished for her.

"Yeah," Sam said softly.

"I couldn't agree more," Freddie said.

"So?" Sam said slowly. "Is that it then? Am I moved in?"

"Well you should probably get the rest of your stuff from yours and Carly's apartment," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "But that can wait until tomorrow."

"Good," Sam said, lacing her arms around his neck. "Because I think it's time we moved this into your bedroom."

"_Our _bedroom," Freddie corrected, quickly getting to his feet and lifting Sam in his arms bride style.

…**..**

**AN-Anyone remember which old Nick show Ashley Blake is from?**


	466. Chapter 466

**AN- So ladyjames, guest, DannySamLover20, Darksun187, Zetay121, and HOAlover9698 all knew the Ashley Blake movies were from Drake and Josh:)**

…

_Crime_

Freddie walked through the mall, trying to find the new herbal tea store his mother had sent him to so he could pick up some of the soothing tea leaves that she had read in her _Aggressive Parenting _magazine kept teenage boys from acting so 'icky'.

Freddie knew these tea leaves were just another plan for her to somehow get him to break up with Sam, and Freddie figured it was better to humor her and get the tea leaves than to have her go on about how dating Sam had turned him into a rebellious hoodlum.

Freddie spotted the tea store and was just about to go inside when he suddenly spotted a familiar blonde walking into the music store next door.

Freddie grinned, glad to find that this mall trip wasn't going to be a total waste; maybe him and Sam could hang out here for a little while before he had to get back home to his crazy mother.

Freddie hurried into the music store, planning on surprising on his girlfriend. As he entered the shop, though, he found that _he _was the one who was surprised.

Sam was looking through CD's, laughing along with some new guy Freddie had never seen before!

_Who's he_? Freddie thought, quickly stepping behind a shelf so he could continue to watch the two.

"Whoa, this one looks cool," the guy said to Sam, showing her a CD. "We should get it and listen to it tonight while we hang out on my boat."

_He has a __**boat**__? _Freddie frowned.

"Yeah, let's do it," Sam nodded. "Oh, and my mom's dating the owner of the Purple Lobster, so he can hook us up with some fancy crab legs for us to have while we're sailing."

_They're going sailing? _Freddie thought to himself. _Why's Sam going sailing with this guy?_

"This is gonna be totally sick tonight," the boy said excitedly. "Hey, Sam, I thought you had a boyfriend now, what was his name…Eddie?"

"Freddie," Sam corrected. "What about him?"

"Well do you think he'd want to come out on the boat with us?" the boy asked.

"Nah, Frednub gets sea sick real easily," Sam shrugged. "And I think he's busy with his mom tonight."

"Oh, okay," the boy nodded.  
"Besides, I wanna hang out just the two of us," Sam said. "It's been way too long since we've been able to have any fun together."

_Wait…what fun are they talking about? _Freddie thought anxiously.

"Too true, Sammy," the boy chuckled.

Freddie didn't think he could stand to hear anymore, so making sure Sam was still distracted, he ran out of the store.

_Why is Sam hanging out with some new guy behind my back_? Freddie thought. _I can't believe she's going sailing with some guy, who calls her __**Sammy**__, and didn't even want me to come along._

Freddie sat down at a nearby bench, feeling completely disheartened.

_Although…Sam did tell me just the other day how badly she wanted to rent a boat and sail around the pier together, _Freddie reminded himself. _And I told her I didn't want to because I always feel sick on the water…_

Freddie bit the corner of his lip thoughtfully. Maybe…maybe this was his wake-up call. Maybe he needed to stop playing it so safe in his relationship with Sam and try to put in some extra effort to make sure Sam really was having the time of her life when she was around him so she wouldn't need to run off with stupid boat boys.

_Time to step up your game, Benson_, Freddie told himself.

…

"Hey, hey!" Sam said brightly later that evening as she let herself into the Shay's apartment, the boy who had been with her earlier at the CD store right behind her.

"Hey!" Carly said, looking up from the sculpture she was helping Spencer with. "Who-Who's your friend?"

Sam rolled her eyes. "Will, this is my best friend Carly and her weird brother, Spencer. Guys, this is my cousin Will."

"Wow, you have _really_ nice hair," Spencer commented.

"Um…thanks?" Will frowned.

"Oh I remember you telling my about Will!" Carly grinned, definitely noticing that he was on the attractive side. "He's your cousin who has his own band."

"Yup," Sam nodded. Then she leaned closer and whispered in Carly's ear, "And he has a girlfriend back home so down girl."

"Sorry," Carly said softly.

"Anyway, Will and I are gonna go sailing tonight," Sam continued. "And we're gonna have distance spitting contest!"

"How…nice," Carly cringed. "Is Freddie going with you guys?"

"Nah, he doesn't like boats," Sam replied. "Too bad, because I really wanted him to meet Will. But I guess that can wait until tomorrow. I told Will he could watch us do iCarly."

"Yeah, I love that show," Will grinned. "When I'm waiting for my mom at the tattoo parlor, I always watch old clips."

"Wow, you two really are related," Carly chuckled. "Well, have fun spitting on your boat."

"Oh, we will," Sam beamed.

…..

The next day at school, Sam was leaning against her locker, entertaining herself by playing on her phone as she waited for Carly and Freddie.

"Morning, baby!" Freddie said brightly, turning the corner with a large, flat box in his hands.

"Morning," Sam smiled, giving him a quick kiss. "What is that? Some project?"

"Nope, these are for you," Freddie said, handing her the box. "They're those fancy Belgian chocolates they sell at the foreign deserts store. You know, the ones you've been dying to try."

"Whoa, no way!" Sam exclaimed, opening up the box to reveal at least fifty chocolates. "These are supposed to be incredible. But…why'd you get them for me? You always say they're way too overpriced."

"I just want you to get to experience the most you can," Freddie shrugged.

"What do you mean?" Sam frowned.

"Nothing," Freddie said quickly. "So…do you like the chocolates?"

"Yeah, of course!" Sam nodded. "Thank you."

She popped one in her mouth. "Oh my God…these are the best chocolates I've ever had. They're even better than those poison Persian ones that Missy chick tried to kill me with. Want one?"

"You're offering me food?" Freddie smirked.

"Well you bought them," Sam pointed out. "Now take one before I change my mind."

"Hmm, these are pretty good," Freddie agreed, taking a chocolate as he tried not to thing about the three-figure price he paid for them. "Oh, and guess what you and I are going to do after iCarly tonight."

"What?" Sam asked.

"I'm taking us to that indoor skydiving place you've always wanted to go to," Freddie grinned.

"Holy chiz, are you serious?" Sam exclaimed.

"Uh-huh!"

"Okay, what's going on?" Sam asked. "You're buying me fancy chocolates and now you're taking me indoor skydiving? It's-It's not our anniversary for another month and a half, right?"

"Relax, Sam, I just want to have a good time with you, that's all," Freddie said.

"Oh, well…okay," Sam said. "I can't wait for tonight then. But I thought you were afraid of heights."

"Yeah, well, I've got to live a little, right?" Freddie laughed nervously.

….

"Okay, I've found four cases of those giant fans they use for indoor skydiving malfunctioning and resulting in fractured thumbs!" Freddie said, frantically looking at his laptop screen.

"How would you fracture your thumb skydiving?" Gibby frowned.

"I don't know!" Freddie snapped. "But its happened! Oh man…my poor thumbs."

"Dude, if you're so scared of indoor skydiving, why don't you just tell Sam?" Carly asked. "She'll understand. I'm sure she wouldn't mind if you just watched while she went."

"No…I'm gonna go with her," Freddie said firmly.

Just then the studio door opened and Sam and Will walked in.

"Hey!" Sam said. "Oh Freddie! I want you to meet Will. He's my-"

"Yeah, yeah, hi _Will_," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Um, you okay?" Sam frowned.

"Yup!" Freddie said, giving her a quick kiss. "And I have some good news, baby. You know how you said you've always wanted to go rock climbing? Well, I have us a two hour slot booked at the rock gym for tomorrow afternoon."

"Wow, really?" Sam smiled. "But I thought you always said you thought rock climbing was too dangerous. Even if it is just in a gym. And don't you think you'll be a little tired from skydiving tonight?"

"Oh don't worry about _me_," Freddie told her, still glaring at Will. "I love doing these things with you!"

…..

"Alright," the skydiving instructor said later that evening as Sam and Freddie got into their gear. "Bob down there's gonna turn on the fan in a few minutes. So when you hear the bell ring, you're gonna go to the end of the ledge and jump."

"Sweet," Sam said excitedly.

"We just _jump_?" Freddie frowned.

"Uh-huh," the instructor nodded. "Any other questions."

"Yes…how many _thumb _injuries have you seen here?" Freddie asked.

"None," the instructor replied, and Freddie breathed a sigh of relief. "But we did have a guy break his nose here last week."

"What?"

"But I'm sure you'll be fine," the instructor said quickly. "Remember, listen for the bell."

"Oh man, this is gonna be _insane_!" Sam said, practically bouncing with anticipation. "You ready, baby?"

"Um, yeah," Freddie said weakly, looking over the ledge at the fan at the bottom, trying not to think about how far up they were.

"This has got to be one of our best dates ever," Sam continued, beaming. "But I still can't believe _you_ wanted to come skydiving."

"What? You think I'm just some boring old boyfriend who can't show my girlfriend a good time and take her to do fun things?" Freddie scoffed. "Please. I am _ready _to do this…Even though I can already feel a nosebleed coming from being up this high."

"Alright! The fan's turning on!" they heard the instructor yell. "You'll be clear to jump in a few minutes!"

"It's just…you've always been uneasy with heights," Sam said. "But if you really want to do this…I think it's great!"

"Yeah, well, I-I _want _to," Freddie said. As scared as he was right now, he'd rather be doing this with Sam instead of having her do it with that Will kid. Who knew, if she realized how much more fun she had with Will than him, she might want to trade boyfriends soon.

Sam looked at him for a moment. "You're really scared," she said softly.

"No I'm not!" Freddie said at once. "Baby, I want to do this with you."

"No, you don't," Sam said knowingly. "I can tell how freaked out you are. Your heart's probably pounding out of your chest!"  
"That's-That's just from being around someone as hot as you," Freddie said lamely.

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Dude. What is going on? Why have you been arranging for us to do all these crazy things together? First it's skydiving, tomorrow it's rock climbing. What's next? Kayaking down Niagara Falls?"

"Well you like this stuff!" Freddie said.

"Yes, _I _do," Sam nodded. "Not you."

"You're clear to jump!" they heard the instructor yell as a loud bell sounded. "Go whenever you're ready!"

"Come on," Freddie said firmly, stepping over to the ledge, trying not to look down. "Let's-Let's do this."

"No," Sam said, taking his hand. "I'm not jumping and neither are you until you tell me what's going on."

"Nothing's going on."

"I'm not buying that."

"Sam-"

"Freddie…"

"Alright!" Freddie conceded. "I-I don't want you to get bored with me and leave me for someone who you'll have more fun with."  
Sam stared blankly at him. "What do you mean? I'm not going to leave you. We have plenty of fun together!"

"No, we just watch movies or get dinner or hang out at Carly's place," Freddie said. "I-I never do anything new and exciting with you. I mean…isn't that why you went sailing with that Will kid and not me?"

Sam frowned. "Um…what?"

"I-I sort of overheard you talking to him about it yesterday at the mall," Freddie admitted. "You were all happy to go with him because I never took you because I was afraid I'd get boat sick. You want to spend time with guys who can keep up with you. Not nerdy nubs like me."

To his surprise, Sam let out a small laugh. "Are you jealous of Will?"

"Well…okay, _yes_, I am!" Freddie admitted. "How do you think it makes me feel that my girlfriend had to find random guys to do adventurous stuff with?"

"Baby?" Sam said. "Will's not a random guy. He's my cousin. You know, one of the few family members I have who haven't resorted to a life of crime yet."

"What-What now?"

"Yeah, I tried to introduce you to him today, but you were being all weird," Sam nodded. "He's staying with me and my mom for a few days. See, him and I used to be really close when we were kids, but then his mom stole my mom's ex-boyfriend and they didn't talk to each other for years. But now they're good again, so that's why Will's here. We haven't gotten to hang out or see each other in years, and he's really good at sailing, so that's why I wanted to go out on the boat with him last night. Besides, I didn't want you to get sick out there."

"Oh…" Freddie said, feeling like a major idiot. "Well then…that makes sense."

"You don't really think I'd pick some guy who likes doing crazy things like me over you, do you?" Sam asked. "I mean, I need _somebody _to keep my feet on the ground. If the two of us start doing risky things, we're not gonna even make it to graduation."

"No, I-I guess not," Freddie chuckled. "So you really don't mind that we don't go out and go boating or scuba diving or anything?"

"I wouldn't trade or Saturday night movie marathons for any crazy stunt in the world," Sam smiled, giving him a quick kiss. "Anyway, I don't want you to go skydiving right now if you're gonna freak yourself out. You can go sit and wait. I'll only go for a few minutes, and then we can go grab some ice cream or something."

"You know what…" Freddie said slowly, stepping back to the ledge. "I'm gonna do this."  
"But I just-"

"I'm not doing it for you," Freddie said, smiling at her. "I'm gonna do it for me."

Sam nodded, stepping onto the ledge with him. "Alright then…let's do this."


	467. Chapter 467

_Paragraph_

Sixteen-year old Quincy stood by his locker at the high school, carefully holding his latest creation from the pottery club. He had spent the last three weeks making an exquisite mug for Emma, and he couldn't wait to see her face when he gave it to her.

"Hey, Quincy," Clarissa said, coming over to him. "I didn't know you were still here. School ended two hours ago."

"Pottery club," he explained. "And since I'm here, I figured I'd wait for Emma's track practice to finish. What about you? Why are you still here?"

"The twins drove me to school today, I had no choice _but _to wait for Emma's track practice and Ashton's cheer practice to finish," she replied. "But I wound up having a bunch of student government stuff to do anyway, so it worked out perfectly. I just need to go drop off these papers in the office, and then do you wanna go wait for them out in the parking lot?"

"Sure," Quincy nodded. "Wait…why don't I just come to the office with you?"

"Because," Clarissa hissed. "It's after hours and I'm the only student in school who has been trusted with the office key and I won't besmear that honor by parading my friends around in there!"

"Besmear?" Quincy smirked. "I think I saw that word on my dad's Word-A-Day calendar."

"Just wait here and I'll be back in a sec," Clarissa told him.

"Alright," Quincy shrugged.

As Clarissa ran off to the office, Quincy leaned against his locker and pulled out his phone.

A few minutes later though, he heard voices coming from the other end of the hall where the locker rooms were. He looked up and smiled as he spotted his girlfriend, Emma, coming out, still wearing her track uniform.

He was just about to call out to her when suddenly a boy he recognized from the boys' track team came out of the guys' locker room.

He frowned as he saw the two step closer to each other, both smiling and laughing, almost as if they were…_flirting_.

_What-What's going on? _Quincy thought to himself. _Who is this guy and what is he doing with __**my **__girlfriend's hand on his shoulder like that?_

Quincy knew Emma would never cheat on him, he trusted her, after all. But still, he was a little uneasy about how close she was getting with this track boy. Even though this boy was clearly much stronger and tougher than him, he suddenly wanted nothing more than to run over and punch him in the face. He was feeling…jealous.

Quincy had never thought of himself as the jealous type, but the more he watched his girlfriend down the hall, the more jealous he felt. And…slightly hurt.

_Why would Emma be getting so flirty and close to some random guy when it took her almost two months to hold my hand in public? _Quincy thought sadly.

Suddenly, he didn't think he could watch the scene any longer. So with one last sad glance over his shoulder, Quincy slowly walked out of the school.

…..

"Oh my God! I had the best day of my entire life!" Ashton said happily as her and Emma walked into their kitchen later that day. "I think I'm in love."  
"Really? Again?" Sam said, looking up from her sandwich. "Weren't you in love just the other week with the guy from the ice cream shop?"

"Ugh, Travis?" Ashton cringed. "Please, he was gross."

"Um, Ash?" Sam frowned, looking at the track clothes she was currently wearing. "Why are you wearing Emma's track uniform?"

"Because she spilled milk on her cheerleading uniform at lunch," Emma explained. "So I was _nice _and let her borrow that for her practice."

"Yeah," Ashton said, looking down at her outfit. "Actually, this is pretty comfy. If only it wasn't such an ugly color, I might invest in one."

"It's not supposed to be fashionable, it's supposed to help you run!" Emma said, rolling her eyes. She turned to Sam. "You see what you make me share a room with?"

"So who's this guy, Ashton?" Sam asked, ignoring Emma's comment.

"He's a guy from the track team," Ashton smiled. "His name is Matt. He's so cute _and _him and I were talking and we found out we're both huge _War of Warlords _fans!"

"Ew, only geeks and nerds like that game," Emma said.

"Hey, your dad happens to be a huge fan of that game," Sam said.

"Yes," Emma nodded. "Your point?"

"Eh, fair enough," Sam shrugged. "So Ash, you think you really like this guy?"

"Yes, weren't you listening? I'm in _love_!"

"You can't be in love with someone you met an hour ago," Sam sighed.

"Who's in love?" Freddie asked, coming into the kitchen.

"Me, I just met my future husband on the track team!" Ashton said, beaming.

"Oh jeez…this again?" Freddie groaned, grabbing a bottle of antacids from the medicine cabinet.

"I have to go call Clarissa," Ashton said brightly. "See you guys later."

"Well…now the chest pains are gonna start up again," Freddie sighed.

"See, aren't you glad you have one daughter who isn't boy crazy and falling in and out of love every week?" Emma smiled up at her dad. "Don't I deserve twenty bucks for that?"

"What?" Freddie frowned. "That doesn't even make any sense!"

"Eh, I figured it was worth a try," Emma shrugged.

…

"Wow, so you really have a date with this Matt guy already?" Clarissa said as she sat up in the twins' bedroom a few days later. "You move fast, Ash."

"Yup, we're gonna get pizza and then go to the batting cages," Ashton smiled.

"You don't even know how to hit a baseball," Emma pointed out. "Why would you want to go to the batting cages?"

"Because Matt really wanted to go," Ashton shrugged. "Besides, how hard could it be?"

"Man I wish I could go on this date and see you make a fool of yourself," Emma smirked. "But I can't. Quincy's coming over to help me with my history paper. You know, the five paragraph essay about the Gold Rush."

"Um, Em?" Clarissa frowned. "That's a five _page_ essay."

"And it's due tomorrow morning," Ashton added. "You mean you haven't even _started _it? Boy, you're in trouble."

"Oh just go on your date so you can get pelted with baseballs!" Emma snapped.

"Good thing Quincy's so good at history," Clarissa pointed out. "He'll help you get that essay finished in no time."

"Hopefully," Emma said. "Although…Has Quincy been acting sort of weird to you guys?"

"What do you mean?" Ashton said.

"I mean, for the past few days, he's seemed really bothered by something, but I don't know what it is," Emma said. "Like yesterday I told him we should go hang out at that new shopping plaza this weekend and he just shrugged me off! And today when I actually _complimented _his shirt, he didn't even say anything!"

"Did you do something?" Clarissa asked.

"No, I-I don't think so," Emma replied. "I mean I did steal his corndog…but that was like, a week ago. Besides, he's used to me stealing his food."

"Well then just ask him what's up," Ashton said. "It's probably nothing, he might just be having a rough week."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Emma nodded.

"Anyway, Matt is gonna be here in two hours to pick me up," Ashton said excitedly. "So come on, help me pick out my outfit!"

….

"Dude, come on!" Sam said as she waited impatiently by the front door. "Our reservations are in twenty minutes!"

"Sam, I highly doubt they're gonna give away our table at Bucky's Wing Spot," Freddie said. "Besides, I wanna meet Ashton's 'future husband' and scare him just enough to make sure that no wedding happens for another thirty or forty years."

"Okay, baby, I mean this in the nicest way possible, but you're not that intimidating," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "You're not gonna scare some guy on the track team."

"Oh Sam," Freddie chuckled. "Sam, Sam, Sam…You see, over the years, I've learned that today, guys aren't so afraid of getting beat up by their girlfriend's fathers as they are of losing something much, much worse. Sure, some dads can scare off their daughter's loser boyfriends with giant muscles and brass knuckles, but _I _can send them a virus so powerful it will ruin their technology for months."

Just then there was a knock at the door.

"Ah, there this _Matt_ is now," Freddie said. "Let him in, Sam."

"Poor kid, he just thought he was coming to pick up a girl for a date," Sam said. "He didn't know he was gonna come face-to-face with a nut job."

She opened the door and the boy from the track team walked in.

"Hi, I'm Matt," the boy said to Sam. "You must be Ashton's mom."

"Yeah, nice to meet you," Sam said. "Ashton should be down in a few minutes, she's just finishing getting ready."

"Yes, Matt, but while we wait," Freddie said, crossing his arm. "Let's have a quick chat…What kind of computer do you have?"

"Oh my God…" Sam mumbled.

"Um, a Pearbook Pro," Matt frowned.

"Ah, very nice," Freddie nodded. "Now tell me…do you like this Pearbook Pro?"

"Well, yeah," Matt replied. "I have all my music, videos and personal photos on it."

"Interesting," Freddie said. "Now Matt, you look like a nice young man-"

"Thank you, sir."

"-But if you try any funny business with my daughter, or hurt her, or do anything to make her unhappy," Freddie continued. "Let's just say…I hope you're one of the few people who know how to work the cloud so you can recover what you can of your files."

"W-What?" Matt said.

"Alright, you freaked him out enough, let's _go,_" Sam said. "I want my wings!"

"Um, actually, Mrs. Benson? Do-Do you have a bathroom I could use?" Matt asked.

"Sure," Sam said. "That door right there."

"You see?" Freddie said proudly as Matt ran off to the bathroom. "I scared him so bad that his bladder couldn't even handle it."

"Do you hear yourself?" Sam asked, shaking her head. "Let's just go eat."

She opened the door again, only to find Quincy standing outside in mid-knock.

"Oh, hey Quince," Sam said. "Emma's upstairs."

"You okay, Quincy?" Freddie asked, noticing the boy seemed to a little down in the dumps.

"Oh, um, yeah," Quincy nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine."

"But you-"

"You heard the kid, he's _fine_," Sam said, grabbing her husband's hand. "Now let's move! If I don't get my wings, you're gonna be sorry, nub."

Just as her parents ran out of the house, Emma came downstairs.

"Hey," Emma smiled, heading over to Quincy to give him a quick kiss. "Ready to help me write my essay? Apparently it has to be five pages, not five paragraphs, but I'm thinking if I just use a really big font, it will work out."

"Yeah…smart thinking," Quincy nodded, trying his best to pull a smile on his face.

But Emma saw right through that. "Okay, Quince, what's up with you?"  
"What do you mean? Nothing's up with me," Quincy replied.

"Dude, you've been acting all mopey lately," Emma pointed out. "So what's bugging you? Are you stressed or are your parents bugging you?"

"No," Quincy sighed.

"Well then what is it?" Emma frowned. "Is-Is it something I did?"

Quincy didn't reply.

"I is, isn't it?" Emma said softly. "Look, Quincy, if I did something, can you at least tell me what it is so I can-"

"Okay!" Quincy cut her off. "I-I saw you flirting with some guy on the track team the other day!"

Emma gave him a confused look. "Huh?"

"I-I know I don't get to control who you talk to, and-and obviously I don't care if you have guy friends," Quincy said. "But-But Emma, you were just so flirty with him! I mean, maybe you didn't mean to be, maybe you just thought you were being friendly, but-but it still kind of bothered me! I mean isn't it just common courtesy that if you're in a relationship, you don't flirt with other people? I thought we loved each other, Emma. Do you know how jealous it made me feel to see you all cozy with some other guy."

"Quincy, I don't know what you're talking about," Emma said, completely lost. "I was never flirting with any of the track guys."

"I saw you," Quincy sighed. "The other day at school. You guys must've just finished up practice because you were both still wearing your uniforms and everything."

"Okay, seriously, I have no idea what you thought you saw, but I wasn't flirting with anybody," Emma said. "I love you! Why would I want to talk up some track guy? Most of them get all moody around me anyway because I can beat most of them! I mean, maybe you saw me talking about our next meet with one of them or something, but I-"

Just then Matt came back out from the bathroom.

"Oh, hey Emma," he said.

"Hey Matt," Emma replied.

"You see! That's him!" Quincy said, pointing at Matt. "That's the guy you were flirting with!"

"Excuse me?" Matt frowned.

"Oh excuse yourself, Pretty Boy!" Quincy snapped. "Why don't you try hitting on someone else's girlfriend."

"Pretty Boy?" Emma scoffed. "First of all, if you're gonna insult someone, let's try and think of a better insult than-"

"Oh, Matt, hi!" Ashton suddenly said, coming downstairs. "You ready to go on our date?"

"Um, yeah, I am," Matt nodded, giving Quincy a strange look.

"Wait…why's Ashton going out with him?" Quincy frowned.

"Oh, by the way, Em, I put your track uniform back in your gym bag," Ashton told Emma as she took Matt's hand. "Thanks again for letting me borrow it."

"She-She borrowed your track uniform?" Quincy said slowly. "Oh…so I must've seen…okay, the pieces are starting to fit together now."

"Oh my God!" Emma exclaimed as Ashton and Matt left. "I can't believe you! You saw _Ashton _flirting with Matt and you thought she was _me_?"

"I-I was pretty far away," Quincy said lamely. "And-And my contacts were a little fuzzy."

"I'm your _girlfriend_ and you can't tell me apart from my _sister_?" Emma yelled, swatting his shoulder. "I can't _believe _you!"

"Ow!" Quincy cringed. "Okay, I-I deserve this-"

"You better believe you deserve it!" Emma snapped. "So you can only tell me and Ashton apart by our _clothes_? So what, if I start wearing dresses all the time will you think I'm her?"  
"No!" Quincy said quickly. "I can always tell you guys apart when you're within _normal_ distance! But-But you were so far away, and-and you know the lighting at the school, sucks. Someone should really do something about that; maybe we can have Clarissa bring it up at the next student government meeting and-"

"Cool it with the lights!" Emma cut him off.

"Alright, I'm sorry," Quincy said. "I-I was a complete idiot. I should've known you wouldn't be all over some guy. And-And I'm sorry I mixed up you and Ashton. But come on! You guys are _really _identical, even for twins! You guys can even trick your parents sometimes!"

Emma shrugged. "Just my dad," she mumbled.

"I'm sorry," Quincy said again. "I just…I dunno, I panicked. When you think you see your girlfriend flirting with some other guy, you don't think things through."

Emma sighed. "Yeah, well…I guess…I guess it was an honest mistake. You're still gonna pay for thinking I'd be all girly and flirty like Ashton, but we'll worry about that later."

"I guess I had that coming," Quincy chuckled.

"Yeah, well, you just better hope you do a good job helping me with this essay," Emma smirked. "Maybe I'll be more forgiving then. So…you-you were really jealous when you thought it was me flirting with Matt?"

Quincy grinned. "Very."

"Hmm," Emma said. "You know, that whole little scene you had with Matt back there was…kind of attractive."

"Was it?"

"It was," Emma said. "Hey, now that Ashton left, we have the place to ourselves…wanna maybe start my history essay a little later?"

"Absolutely."


	468. Chapter 468

_Dialog_

"-And then the fire sprinklers went on and emus started eating the baseball caps," Spencer said to Sam and Carly one afternoon in the Shay's apartment. "So the SWAT team had to be called in which of course caused the lemurs to freak out and start throwing breadsticks everywhere."

"So…I'm gonna assume there's not going to be a second date with that Danielle girl," Carly said.

"No, she already changed her number and started the restraining order," Spencer sighed.

"Eh, don't worry, my mom's gotten plenty of restraining orders," Sam told him, looking up from her Pearpad. "There's always a loophole in them somewhere."

"Oh yeah, you're mom is good at finding loopholes in legal documents," Carly nodded. "Hey, anyway, are you and Freddie doing anything tonight?"

"Yeah, actually my cousin just got a new job as a busboy at that new lobster place, so we managed to get a table," Sam said. "You wanna come with?"

"You want me to go on your date with Freddie?" Carly frowned. "Wait, I'm not gonna have to referee fights, am I?"

"Nah, Freddie and went out last night, so this can just be dinner with three friends," Sam chuckled. "Although Frednub better know he's still paying for me…"

"Well alright," Carly smiled. "Sounds fun."

"Just make sure there's no emus in the parking lot," Spencer said, shuddering slightly.

"Hey! Look at this!" Sam suddenly exclaimed, holding up her Pearpad. "You know that show on the Horror Channel that goes all around the world collecting super creepy things like shrunken heads and voodoo dolls?"

"Yes, you've forced me to watch it a few times," Carly nodded.

"Well they're going on tour to show all the stuff they've found, and they're coming to Seattle next Saturday!" Sam said. "I _have_ to go! I can get a picture with the bat with three wings!"

"Wait," Carly said. "Isn't next Saturday Freddie's formal end-of-the-year dinner with the AV club? I thought you he wanted you to go with him as his date."

"Oh crab, you're right!" Sam moaned. "Stupid AV club, they always mess everything up!"

"Sorry," Carly said. "Well, maybe you can see the very end of the tour after the dinner."

"It won't be the same," Sam mumbled. "You know what? I'm going to that exhibit…"

"You can't just cancel on Freddie," Carly said.

"I'm not gonna cancel, Freddie's gonna let me go," Sam said, a sly smile sneaking onto her face. "You see, Carly, this past year of being in a relationship has taught me something."

"Oh jeez," Carly sighed.

"It's all about give and take," Sam continued. "It all comes down to something I like to call, The Relationship Vault."

"The Relationship Vault?" Carly repeated.

"Yeah, see, if I want Freddie to willingly let me skip his AV club dinner to go the exhibit, I just need to do something equally nice for him before," Sam explained. "That way I'll have something in the vault to use when I bring up the exhibit."

"Um…so you're saying you actually keep track of the nice things you do for Freddie so that you can use them for your benefit later?" Carly frowned.

"Duh, that's what being in a relationship is all about," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Now I just need to think of something that would get me enough in the vault to get me to that exhibit…"

"I feel like I should give some big moral speech here," Carly said, shaking her head.

"Ah-ha! I found something perfect!" Sam said triumphantly as she scrolled through her Pearpad. "There's some big silent film festival tomorrow night in the park, and one of Freddie's favorite directors is gonna be showing some of his films there! He'll love it and I'll be super board! He'll _have _to let me blow off this dinner!"

"Sam," Carly started. "Do you really think that's fair to just-"

She was interrupted, though, as Freddie came into the apartment

"Hey," he said. "I just heard this weird story on the news about this guy who almost shut down the zoo while he was out on a date."

"It wasn't my fault!" Spencer yelled, getting to his feet and stomping off towards his room. "That reptile house was _dark_!"

"Do I wanna know?" Freddie frowned, coming to sit down next to Sam.

"No you do not," Carly said as the couple exchanged a quick kiss.

"Hey, baby I have a surprise for you," Sam grinned as Freddie put his arm around her.

"It's not gonna hurt, is it?" Freddie asked reluctantly.

"No," Sam assured him. "You know that director you really like? Paul Gisso?"

"Yeah, that guy's a genius with a camera," Freddie nodded. "What about him?"

"Well tomorrow night he's going to be at the silent film festival in the park," Sam said. "I thought you and I could go there and see some of his stuff."

"What?" Freddie exclaimed. "Baby, that'd be great! You really want to go?"

"Yeah, it'd be…_fun_," Sam nodded.

"Wow, I can't wait to meet him," Freddie said. "I could have him autograph my video camera!"

"Yeah, that will be so cool," Sam said, a strained smile on her face. "_So _cool."

…..

The next night, Sam struggled to keep her eyes open as her and Freddie sat on a blanket in the park, watching the silent film on the screen in front of them.

_How can this movie go on for three hours without any talking? _Sam thought, trying to contain a yawn. _All this movie has is a bunch of people sitting around looking off into the distance! Where's the car chase? The zombies? The killer gorilla?_

Finally, the ending credits flashed onto the screen, and Sam quickly pulled herself together and clapped along with the rest of the audience.

"Wow," Freddie said, clearly still moved by the film. "How amazing was that? Did you see the characterizations? The inner conflicts? The use of light in place of dialog to convey the message of man's constant battle for answers?"

"Yeah, I _totally_ got all that," Sam said. "Well, now that the movie's over, I guess we should head home."  
"No, we're in luck, baby!" Freddie grinned. "They're about to show the sequel!"  
"The-The sequel?" Sam frowned.

"Yeah!" Freddie nodded. "So we get another three hours of pure captivation!"

"Oh…how nice," Sam said as the second film popped onto the screen.

"Shh! It's starting!" Freddie said.

"Why does it matter if I talk? There's no sound in the movie anyway!"

"It takes away from the simplicity!"

"Oy," Sam mumbled under her breath. "That three-winged bat better be worth this."

…..

"It was amazing, Carly, I still can't believe somebody could use symbolism in such a complex way," Freddie said later the next day as the teens sat up in the iCarly studio. "Right, baby?"

"Yeah…it was six _fun_ hours of symbolism," Sam said.

Carly chuckled. "Well at least you could understand what was going on. When I had to see that Russian flick with that Kyle guy, I was _completely_ lost."

"Yeah, I'm sure that was_ much _worse," Sam said, a hint of sarcasm in her voice. She turned to Freddie. "Anyway, Freddie? I actually have something to run by you."

"What is it?" Freddie asked.

"Well you know how your AV dinner is Saturday, right?"

"Of course, I have my fancy tie with the HDMI cords on it all ironed and ready to go," Freddie smiled.

"Yeah…well, as cool as that sounds," Sam said. "I-I was thinking…how about _you _go to that while _I _spend the evening looking at three-winged bats and mummified brains."

Freddie frowned. "What do you mean?"

"The _Totally Disgusting Collectors _show is coming on tour to Seattle," Sam explained. "And they'll only be here on Saturday. Come on, you know how much I love that show!"

"But-But you and I already made plans to go to my AV club's dinner," Freddie said slowly.

"So? You can still go," Sam shrugged. "It's not like you'll be the only guy there who doesn't have a date. Actually, if I go, you'll be the only guy _with _one."

"But I was really looking forward to you going with me," Freddie said. "And I thought you were even a little excited. They're gonna have steak, you know."

"Yeah, but…mummified brains!" Sam pointed out. "Come on, baby, I went to that film festival for you last night."

"Well yeah, and I really appreciate that," Freddie said. "But I-I'd still like it if you went to this dinner with me. It would-Wait…Sam? Did you only go to that film festival so that you could use it to get out of this dinner?"

"I…_no_," Sam said lamely.

Freddie raised an eyebrow.

"Well you had a good time!" Sam defended. "That should cancel out me not going to the dinner!"

"Um…I think I'm gonna go get some plum juice," Carly said, quickly heading to the door. "I think you guys need some alone time."

"Sam, look, if you wanna go to the exhibit, then go," Freddie sighed, as Carly left the studio. "I'm not in charge of you; I can't make you do anything. I just…I really wanted you to be there on one of the most special nights of the year for me."

"Well now you're just trying to make me feel guilty," Sam groaned.

"I'm not trying to make you feel anything," Freddie said simply. "You don't have to go to the dinner…like you said, I won't be the only guy with no date. But…just know, Sam, when I do things for you, I don't expect anything out of them except us having a good time together."

"Freddie-" Sam started, but Freddie had already turned and walked out of the studio.

…

"Wow, someone looks fancy," Spencer said as Freddie walked into the apartment a few days later wearing a suit.

"Thanks," Freddie said, giving him a small smile. "I'm about to head off to my AV club dinner."

"Is-Is Sam coming?" Carly asked.

"Nah, she's probably already at that exhibit thing, trying to sneak some shrunken heads home," Freddie sighed. "Oh well."

"I'm sorry, I know you were looking forward to going with her," Carly said.

"It's fine," Freddie shrugged. "It's no big deal."

Though Carly could tell by the look on his face that it _was_ a big deal to him.

Just then, as Freddie was about to turn and leave the apartment, the door opened again, and Sam walked in wearing a stunning black dress.

"Hey, good, you're all ready," Sam said to Freddie.

"What are you doing here?" Freddie asked. "I thought you were at the exhibit."

"Nope," Sam said simply. "I already have plans with you tonight."

"But Sam, the dinner's going to go on for a few hours," Freddie told her. "You'll probably miss the exhibit by the time it's over."

"Yeah, well, there will be other exhibits with gross things," Sam smiled. "This is your last year in the AV club before you graduate. You're never gonna get to do this again. I want to be there with you for it. Now come on, I wanna sit before my feet fall off from these heels."


	469. Chapter 469

_Characteristic_

"Wow, this is really a nice one," Spencer said as he sat in Freddie's kitchen, examining the diamond engagement ring Freddie had showed him.

"Thanks, I've been saving all year for it," Freddie said proudly. "You think Sam will like it?"

"Of course she will, dude," Spencer replied. "She loves you. She'll want to marry you whether you give her this ring or one from a gumball machine…but you should probably stick with this one."

"Yeah, I was planning on it," Freddie chuckled.

"So do you know how you're gonna do it?" Spencer asked.

"Yup!" Freddie said, opening his fridge and pulling out a large slice of chocolate cake. "This is the same type of cake Sam and I ordered on our first date. Tonight when she comes over, I'm gonna bring this out for desert. Only _this _slice won't only be filled with chocolate cream and frosting…"

He carefully placed the ring in the middle of the cake, making sure it was completely hidden.

"Ah, the old 'Hide the Ring in the Cake' trick," Spencer grinned. "Very clever."

"I figure what better way to propose than to couple it with one of Sam's favorite foods," Freddie said.

"Well good luck tonight," Spencer said. "Hey, I have some fancy candles you can borrow and try to set the mood if you want."

"Um, I'd rather not borrow anything flammable from you," Freddie frowned. "No offense, but that kind of seems like a bad omen."

"Come on, I'm getting better with the fire issue!" Spencer said. He pulled out his wallet. "Look, I used my hot glue gun today to fix the flap on my wallet, and nothing burst into flames! I'm telling you, I think that was just a phase that-oh jeez!"

The wallet suddenly burst into flames, and Freddie quickly grabbed the fire extinguisher, putting out the fire.

"How-How was that-That's not even _possible_!" Spencer exclaimed.

"I think you still have a bit of a fire issue," Freddie said.

….

"Okay…fancy music, check. Sam's favorite fried chicken, check. Candles that have never been tainted by Spencer, check. Alright, I-I think that's everything," Freddie said, looking around the kitchen that he had finally finished setting up for his big moment.

He tried to steady his nerves, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge. As he opened the fridge, he checked one last time to make sure that ring was perfectly hidden in the cake.

"I hope she says yes," Freddie mumbled to himself. He knew he wanted nothing more than to be Sam's husband; tonight had to go just right.

"Oh! I know what I need!" Freddie said. "That fancy new room freshener! It's tropical breeze, Sam's favorite. Now where did I put it…ugh, I think it's in my room somewhere."

He retreated into his bedroom to grab the spray, and no more than a few seconds had passed when Sam let herself into Freddie's apartment.

"Freddie?" she said, tossing her bag and coat on the floor next to the coatrack. "Yo, nub! You here?"

"Yeah! I'll be out in a sec, baby!" Freddie called from his bedroom. "Just wait there."

"Whatever," Sam shrugged, heading right into the kitchen. She had just finished a long day at work and she was starving.

She glanced at the table, about to reach for a piece of chicken from the platter, but she remembered how Freddie always liked her to wait for him before she started their meals together, so she turned to the fridge instead.

Freddie may not like it when she started the main course early, but he said nothing about snacking after all.

"Whoa, cake!" Sam grinned, pulling the cake slice out of the fridge. "I can't believe the dork was hiding this from me!"

She wasted no time in scooping up some frosting with her finger and licking it off.

"Oh yeah…that's good stuff," Sam said, closing her eyes in the sensation of it all. She grabbed a fork from the drawer and began to dig in, not slowing down as she devoured the cake in less than thirty seconds.

"Alright, I'm here," Freddie said, coming out of his room, deciding to forget the air freshener. "I hope you're hungry, Sam, because I have a ton of chicken here and a surprise for desert that I think you'll-"

As Freddie spotted the now empty cake plate in Sam's hands, he quickly fell silent.

"What's wrong?" Sam asked, tossing the plate into the sink as she came over and gave him a quick kiss.

"S-Sam?" Freddie said slowly. "Did-Was that cake the cake from-from my fridge?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah," Sam shrugged, sitting down at the table. "It was good."

"But-But that was our desert," Freddie said, still in shock.

"Oh, it was? Sorry, my bad," Sam said. "I was hungry and all stressed from work. See, my boss took out the coffee machine and-"

"Sam, did you eat that _entire _piece of cake?" Freddie asked, his eyes widening.

"What? Yeah," Sam nodded. "Look, if you want, I'll go out and get us some more cake for us to _share _after dinner if that will make you happy."

_Oh no_, Freddie thought to himself. _Please tell me this isn't happening!_

"Okay, um, baby?" Freddie said, trying to remain calm. "When you were eating the cake…did-did anything, um, fall out?"

"Fall out?" Sam repeated. "What are you talking about? What falls out of _cake_?"

"So you ate that _entire _piece?" Freddie said. "Like…all of it?"

"Yes! How is that so hard for you to understand?" Sam said, confused about Freddie's behavior.

"Oh man," Freddie moaned. "Oh man…this is _not _good."

"_What's_ not good?" Sam demanded.

"I-Sam, we sort of need to get you to the emergency room," Freddie said, quickly taking Sam's hand and helping her to her feet.

"The emergency room?" Sam exclaimed. "Why? Was that cake poison or something?"

"No!"

"Then why do I need to go to the emergency room?"

"I-I can't tell you, okay?" Freddie told her. "But-But just…come on!"

…..

When Sam and Freddie arrived at the emergency room, Sam was still questioning Freddie about _what _in the world was going on, and Freddie was still refusing to answer.

"Hi, um excuse me?" Freddie said to the nurse at the front desk. "My-My girlfriend needs to see a doctor?"

"Why?" the nurse asked.

"Yeah, _why_?" Sam snapped, now very irritated with Freddie. "_Why _was I dragged to a hospital when there's uneaten chicken waiting for me back at your place?"

"Um, Sam?" Freddie said. "Is that a Canadian Fat Cake vending machine over there?"

"What? Where?" Sam gasped, turning around.

"Look," Freddie said quickly, taking advantage of Sam's momentary distraction. "I was gonna propose to my girlfriend tonight. I put the ring in this piece of cake we were gonna have later tonight, but she _ate _the cake and the ring before I could make that happen!"

"So your girlfriend swallowed her own engagement ring?" the nurse said, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes!" Freddie hissed. "But I-I can't have her know about the ring yet! Not until I can properly propose and give her this nice little speech I had planned out and-"

"There's no Canadian Fat Cakes here!" Sam said, turning back towards Freddie. "Now stop making up chiz and _tell _me why you dragged me here!"

"Alright ma'am, I'm gonna need you to come back with me," the nurse said to Sam. "We're gonna take you back to Dr. Rallings…he's somewhat of an expert in this field."

"Expert in what field?" Sam frowned. "I'm not going to see any doctor until I know what's going on here and-"

"Look, Sam, I-I know how weird this must seem, but just trust me on this, okay?" Freddie said gently. "I-I promise I'll explain everything in a little bit. Just…do this for me, okay?"

"Ma'am? We need to get you back to Dr. Rallings now," the nurse said to Sam again.

"Trust me," Freddie said again.

Sam looked at him. "I-I Fine! But you have some _serious _explaining to do, Benson!"

As Freddie watched his girlfriend disappear with the nurse, he leaned against the wall, sighing heavily.

_Well, so far this night hasn't exactly turned out as I planned_, Freddie thought to himself.

…..

About an hour later, a doctor approached Freddie in the waiting room.

"Mr. Benson?"

"Hi, yes, that's me," Freddie said to the man in the white coat. "Did-Did you get my girlfriend's engagement ring out of her stomach?"

"Yes," the doctor nodded, pulling the diamond ring out of his pocket and holding it out towards Freddie. "We were able to get it out quite easily. We just had to give your girlfriend some prune juice and other substances to, er, speed the removal process along."

"Oh," Freddie said, staring at the ring hesitantly.

"We of course sanitized it heavily afterwards," the doctor assured him.

"Oh thank God," Freddie said, breathing a sigh of relief as he took the ring. "Thank you. I-I guess you don't see people coming in here with engagement rings stuck in them too often, do you?"

"You'd be surprised what you see as a doctor," the doctor replied. "Why just last week we had a man rushed in here with an oven mitt stuck in his-"

"Dr. Rallings? You're needed in the ICU," the nurse called over from the front desk.

"Ah, well, I need to be on my way," the doctor told Freddie. "Have a nice evening, Mr. Benson."

"Wait, can I go see Sam now?" Freddie asked.

"Yes, she's been asking for you," he nodded. "You might want to get in there quick…she seemed a bit, er, angry. She's in room 357."

"Great, thanks again," Freddie said.

He took the elevator up to the third floor. As he stood outside Sam's door, he slipped the ring into his pocket and took a deep breath before walking inside the room.

Sam was sitting in a hospital bed wearing a white gown, glaring at Freddie.

"Um..how-how are you doing?" Freddie said lamely.

"Alright, Benson, talk!" Sam said. "Why was I just forced to drink a bunch of gross juices? What is going on?"

"Um, well...see, Sam, it-it turns out…there was something in that cake you ate earlier," Freddie said slowly.

"What?" Sam exclaimed.

"I, um, put something in it that you weren't supposed to find until later," Freddie explained. "When we ate that cake _together. _But…" he let out a small chuckle. "I should've known you wouldn't wait for me to eat that cake. I mean, that's one of the things I love about you, Sam. You do what you want; you don't let anybody come in the way of what you want."

"What was in the cake?" Sam asked.

Freddie stepped closer to the bed, leaning down to kiss her before reaching back into his pocket and pulling out the engagement ring. "This."

Sam's eyes grew wide. "Is that…That's not…"

Freddie smiled as he lowered himself to one knee beside the hospital bed. "Sam…you're not like other girls. You're loud and blunt and _very _aggressive, whereas other girls wouldn't ever dream of eating an entire rack of ribs on their own or of flipping truck drivers with barely any effort. But that's what I love! You're your own person. I love never knowing what to expect when I'm around you. I can plan to go to a fancy restaurant with you and wind up at a monster truck rally, having the time of life. I could plan on taking you to see a movie and end up in Canada trying to find you the best maple syrup in the world. And I can plan on proposing to you with the old 'Ring in the Cake' trick only to have you swallow the ring as you _inhale _the cake. You keep me on my toes, and I couldn't imagine living a life where I wasn't constantly thrown off track. I want to spend the rest of my life with you doing the unexpected. Together. So Samantha Joy Puckett? Will you marry me?"

"I-You-I-" Sam stammered. "I-I _really _swallowed my engagement ring?"

"It was my own fault," Freddie chuckled. "Eating at high speeds is one of your most famous characteristics. So-So what do you say? Will you marry me?"

Sam's face broke out into a wide smile as she nodded her head. "Yes, nub. I'll marry you."  
Freddie jumped to his feet, sliding the ring onto her finger before wrapping his arms around her and kissing her passionately.

"Well," he said when they pulled apart. "I guess we'll always have a good story to tell now."

"Yeah," Sam laughed. "I think this would definitely be a good conversation starter at parties."

She looked down at the ring. "Wow…it's so beautiful baby."

"Like you," Freddie said.

Sam glanced back up at him. "But they like, _cleaned _this after they, you know, got it out of me, right?"

"Yes," Freddie nodded, rolling his eyes. "It's clean. Although maybe we should use my mom's sterilizing wipes on it too…There's hospital sterile, and then there's Marissa Benson sterile, after all."


	470. Chapter 470

**AN-This oneshot takes place after the Killer Tuna Sam & Cat special. It centers around the little link that PrincessIzz found in the episode. In iLove You, Freddie says that kissing Sam at the lock-in was 'fun'. And then at the end of the Sam & Cat episode, Sam says they would go have some 'fun' once Freddie gets out of the hospital.**

…**..**

_Accommodation_

"So just avoid heavy lifting, dangerous environments and roller-coaster for the next few days, and you'll be fine," the doctor told Freddie as he took off the last of his bandages. "Just try and accommodate for your injuries as best you can."

Sam, who was waiting by the end of his hospital bed, rolled her eyes. "Eh, he'll be okay. He doesn't have that exciting of a life anyway."

Freddie narrowed his eyes. "Ha, ha."

"Yes…he does look like a fairly boring fellow," the doctor nodded.

"Hey!" Freddie said indignantly. "That's not…Yeah, it's true."

"Well, if you feel any extreme pain, just give me a call, other than that, you shouldn't need to come back here," the doctor said.

"Okay, thanks," Freddie said as the doctor headed out of the room.

"Okay, Benson," Sam said, getting to her feet. "Ready to have some _fun_?"

"Yeah, I think so," Freddie said, wincing slightly as he stood up. "Just give me a minute to-ow!"

Sam had tossed a motorcycle helmet right at him, nearly causing him to topple back onto the bed as he caught it.

"Well come on, I don't have all day," Sam said.

"What's this helmet for?" Freddie asked.

"We're taking my motorcycle, duh," Sam replied.

"Your motorcycle-Sam!" Freddie exclaimed. "You heard the doctor! He said no dangerous environments!"

"Hence the _helmet_," Sam said. "And don't worry, nub, I'll drive carefully. I'll take the street with only three potholes for me jump over."

"You know, now that you're here in LA living on your own, you'd think you'd have gotten a little more responsible and cautious," Freddie said, shaking his head.

"Yeah, you would think that," Sam smiled. "Now you coming or not?"

"I'm coming," Freddie said. "Where are we going anywhere?"

"Well let's see…" Sam said thoughtfully as he walked through the hospital halls. "Your eighty bucks won't get us too far in LA…this city is crazy expensive. So unless you want to shell out more money, our options are Inside-Out-Burger, the beach, or my place. But keep in mind Cat has been up since six this morning trying to figure out how to get our toilet to flush backwards like they do in Australia, so it's kind of messy there."

"Er, the beach sounds nice," Freddie said.

"Good call," Sam said.

….

The two arrived at the beach a little while later, Freddie still feeling his heart racing from the motorcycle ride.

"I thought you said you'd drive _carefully_!" Freddie said, trying to catch his breath as he got off the bike.

"I did!" Sam said.

"You went through three stop signs and cut off two old ladies crossing the street in their wheelchairs!"

"Eh, I had the right of way," Sam shrugged.

"You had no such thing!"

"Oh quit being such a downer, we're at the beach!" Sam said. "I thought you wanted to have some fun."

"This does look like a nice beach," Freddie sighed.

"Then let's go, Fredgut!" Sam said, hurrying off towards the sand.

"Wait, Sam! I can't run that fast! I'm _injured _from your demon tuna fish still!"

"First of all, they weren't _my _fish, they were _Dice's_," Sam corrected. "And second of all…ugh, just come on. I haven't been to beach in almost six months!"

"Why? You live like, right there."

"Yeah, but I don't have time to lay around on the beach all day," Sam said. "I have to babysit, make sure Cat doesn't try and burn the apartment down, help Dice train his fighter friend, Goomer…and occasionally I _have _to do chiz for online school. I'm busy!"

"Alright well…what-what do you want to do?" Freddie asked.

Sam sighed as she saw Freddie wincing in pain.

_I guess the nub really __**is **__hurt_…

"Why don't we go sit down by the ocean?" Sam suggested. "You can rest for a little bit."

"But you said-"

"Eh, we'll go down to the boardwalk and play the lame games later or something," Sam shrugged. "Come on, let's go sit."

She walked slowly through the sand so Freddie could keep up.

"Thanks," Freddie said, flashing her a small smile as the two sat down.

"I can't kick a nub when he's down…even when that nub is you," Sam said. She looked over at his arm, still slung in a cast. "So…what do you think your mom's going to say when she sees you like this?"

"I'd rather not think about the explosion right now," Freddie said.

"How'd you manage to convince her to let you come down here in the first place anyway?" Sam asked.

"I told her I was coming here for the Teenage Boys Against Hooliganism and Disobedience club's annual conference that she thinks I'm apart of."

"Ah," Sam nodded. "So, she's still crazy as ever then?"

"Yeah," Freddie chuckled. "I think she's gotten even crazier…or I could just be saying that because with you and Carly gone now, I have to spend a lot more time with her at my place."

Sam looked down at her lap. "Yeah…sorry about that."

Freddie gave her a small smile as he looked out at the ocean. "It's okay…but I've really missed you, you know."

"What? You missed your daily wedgies and constant insults?" Sam scoffed.

"Sort of," Freddie admitted. "Seattle hasn't been the same without you, Sam."

"Well, you have Gibby and Spencer still," Sam reasoned.

"A person can only take so much Gibby," Freddie said. "And Spencer's great, but, well, I guess Carly leaving was the wake-up call he needed to start finally trying to make a few friends his own age. I still hang out with him, but he's not around as much as he used to be."

"Wait…" Sam said slowly. "Are you telling me Spencer Shay made _grown-up friends?_"

"I know, it's still weird to think about," Freddie nodded.

"Wow," Sam said softly. "Who would've thought…"

"Yeah," Freddie said.

Sam waited a moment, appreciating the silence between the two before she opened up her mouth again to ask about the thing that had been on her mind since she first found out Freddie was in LA. "So…you and Cat…."

"What about her?" Freddie frowned.

"She was flirting pretty hard there with you," she said simply.

"Well yeah, I guess," Freddie agreed. "But I thought you said that was just so she could get back at you for stealing her friend."

"I know," Sam replied. "But…um, she's still cute, right?"

"Um…sure, I guess," Freddie said, confused. "Why are you asking me that?"

"Did you, you know, like it?"

"Like what?" Freddie asked, confused.

"Her flirting with you," Sam said, looking anywhere but his gaze.

"What? No!" Freddie said. "I thought it was weird! But I was so focused on make sure you and your buttocks were okay that I just went with it! Ugh! And I said buttocks again!"

Sam smiled, glad to hear that Freddie was drawn in by Cat's innocently stupid charm.

"I still can't believe you fell for her little story about me and that sports utility vehicle," Sam said. "I knew you were gullible, but I think that's a new low for you."

"Well she said you were hurt, I didn't sit around asking questions!" Freddie defended.

Sam rolled her eyes. "Yeah, but I don't think buttocks can even _get _broken."

"Well I'm a tech nerd, not a doctor," Freddie pointed out.

Sam laughed as she looked down at the sand. "So…you-you were worried about me then?"

"Of course," Freddie said. "I care about you Sam…a lot. That's why I was so against you jumping those tuna. If something happened to you, I-I don't know what I would do."

Sam looked up at him. "Really?"

Freddie nodded. "Really."

"Well, um, thanks," Sam said. She cleared her throat. "And, um, if it means anything…I was pretty freaked out when I saw you fall into that tub of tuna. I-I don't want to see you get hurt either…unless I'm the cause of it."

Freddie rolled his eyes. "Thanks…that _does _mean a lot."

Sam moved a little closer to him. "Hey, well, even though you almost got eaten alive by crazed tuna fish…I'm still glad you're here."

"Me too…even though I'm probably never going to be able to eat a tuna fish sandwich without having some traumatic flashback," Freddie said. "Though I guess that's okay; my mom never buys the stuff anyway."

"Yeah…good thing," Sam said.

Another silence fell over the two.

"So…you and that Robbie guy," Freddie said after a few moments. "You're not…you were just trying get back at Cat for bringing me here to get back at _you _for stealing her other friend…right?"

"Oh yeah," Sam said at once. "Trust me…I washed my mouth out _real_ good after I kissed him."

"Good," Freddie said. "Because I have to say, after sharing a hospital room for almost a week with that kid…he's horrible."

"Right? I don't know what Cat sees in him, but she really does seem to like him," Sam said. "You realize that since he got out of the hospital two days ago, she's had him over nearly the whole time making him soup and heating his socks?"

"Weird," Freddie said. He glanced over at her. "Although…there _have _been stranger couples."

Sam grinned. "You mean_ us_?"

"Well yeah," Freddie nodded. "I mean we would be at each others throats fighting one minute, then making out the next, we had that Saturday night tradition of meat golf in the parking lot of Amazing Glaze, and we spent one whole day trying to figure out what exactly is _in_ canned ham."

"Oh yeah," Sam recalled. "We had some good times…weird times, but good ones too."

"We did," Freddie said, smiling at the memories. "It's too bad, though…"

"What is?"

"Um, never mind," Freddie said quickly.

"Dude, spit it out," Sam said firmly.

"Okay," Freddie sighed. "It's just too bad that, well, you live in LA now and I'm still in Seattle because-because now we'll never get to have our second chance at those good times like we planned, remember?"

Sam frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"You remember when we broke up? How we said one day we'd try it out again?" Freddie said heavily. "Well…we never got around to that, did we?"

"No," Sam said softly. "I guess we didn't…"

"And now I guess we'll never get to again," Freddie mumbled. He let out a deep breath. "Oh well, right? I guess it worked out for the best. I didn't exactly become any more abnormal."

"You were 'abnormal' enough to lie to your mom and rush down to LA because you thought I was run over," Sam pointed out. "Only to wind up being mauled by fish."

Freddie chuckled. "True."

Sam bit the corner of her lip. "Look…I-I may live in LA now, and you may still live in Seattle…but does that really have to be the end of it?"

"Huh?"

Sam moved even closer to him. "Just because we're not in the same state anymore, does that really mean we have to just forget any chance of _us _happening again? You said we were always a strange couple…but we were a pretty good one when we were together, even with all the fighting and differences."

"What are you saying?" Freddie asked slowly.

"I'm saying…If seeing you almost ripped apart by Razorback Tuna has taught me anything, it's that…I sort of need you around, Benson," Sam smirked. "Even if you're not in LA with me…I still need you because I-I…I still love you."

Freddie smiled. "Well if this whole thing has taught _me _anything, it's that…broken bones and eight dozen bits all over my body are nothing compared to what it's like not having you in my life anymore."

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Well…maybe we should fix that."

"How would we do that?"

"Oh, I don't know," Sam said. "Maybe…maybe like this."

And with that she leaned over, gently kissing Freddie.

The two stayed like that for several minutes, neither wanting to pull away from the other.

But unfortunately, the lack of oxygen forced them to break the kiss soon, and they pulled apart, both out of breath.

"W-Wow," Freddie managed to stammer. "That was…that was fun."

"It was, wasn't it?" Sam said.

"Yeah…just as much fun as we used to have," Freddie grinned.

Sam laughed. "Well…I know your doctor said no dangerous environments, but there's this really nice spot underneath the pier that's sort of hidden…Wanna go have some more 'fun' there?"

"Only a complete _idiot_ would say no to that," Freddie chuckled. "Let's go."

"Wait, dude, slow down," Sam said as Freddie jumped up. "Don't hurt yourself."

"Don't worry about me," Freddie assured her. "It's worth it."


	471. Chapter 471

**AN-This oneshot is actually not a request like all the rest, but I really wanted to write it. It's loosely based off of an old episode of one of my favorite sitcoms **_**Everybody Loves Raymond.**_

…..

_Comprehensive_

"Hey, Sam!" Carly said brightly, letting herself into the Benson's house.

"Hey, Carls," Sam yawned from the couch, where she was nursing her three-month old son, Jason. "What's up?"

"Nothing, I just thought I'd swing by," Carly replied. "Oh, and I stopped by that cute little baby boutique and picked up this cute new bib for Jason."

She opened up her bag and pulled out a blue big with a picture of a puppy digging on it. "See, it says 'I _dig _my mommy'. Get it, because of the dog?"

"Aw, thanks," Sam smiled as she began to put he bib on Jason. "I _dig _him too. Even if he does like to keep me up all night."

"Oh, cool, did you and Freddie go to Pottery Barrel?" Carly asked, spotting the large Pottery Barrel bag in the middle of the floor. "What'd you get? I heard they had some new fancy-"

"Don't. Touch. That. Bag!" Sam said firmly, startling Carly.

"What? Why?" Carly frowned. 'Oh, Sam! You didn't buy more Japanese fireworks. You have a _baby _in the house!"

"No I didn't buy fireworks," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "But that bag stays right where it is! It's a matter of pride!"

"Okay…I know I shouldn't ask what's going on, but I've had a pretty slow day, so why not?" Carly sighed. "_Why _can't I move the bag?"

"Because," Sam said. "It all started last week…Frenub's mom was watching Jason for us, so we decided to go to the mall. So we had a nice three-hour break of shopping and corndogs. But Freddie kept getting all whiny because I made him carry all the bags. He made way too big a deal out of it; it was only like, five bags. And so when we got home, while he was carrying the bags up to our room, he dropped this Pottery Barrel one. Now, at _first _I thought it was an accident and he'd come back and get it. But he _didn't_. And so I thought maybe he forgot about it. But for the past week he's bee blatantly walking past it and stepping over it. _And _last night I realized that nub actually went into the bag, got the sheets we bought, and put them on our bed! Do you realize what's happening?"

"The two most stubborn people are living under the same roof?" Carly suggested.

"No! Freddie's trying to rearrange our whole power order!" Sam exclaimed. "He wants _me _to pick up that bag! He thinks _he _can suddenly start calling the shots around here!"

"Oh come on, if Freddie carried all your bags at the mall, can't you just bring this one upstairs?" Carly said. "Isn't that fair?"

"Hey! I carried his _son _for _nine months_!" Sam pointed out. "You think I wouldn't have _loved _for him to carry Jason around for even a few minutes and have _him _deal with the heartburn and the back aches and the peeing ever ten minutes!"

"I-I don't think science is quite there yet," Carly said.

"Well I do all the real work around this place," Sam said. "I always cook for him and stay home with Jason and I even started doing his _laundry_. His _laundry_!"

"So you're just going to let this giant bag sit here until Freddie breaks down and picks it up?" Carly said in disbelief.  
"That's right," Sam smiled.

"You know…now I don't know why I'm so eager to get married," Carly said, shaking her head.

….

"Freddie? Freddie!"

"Huh, what?" Freddie stammered, snapping his eyes back open. "Oh, sorry Gib. Were you saying something?"

"I was _telling _you about this great new place I found to have your pants steamed," Gibby said indignantly. "What kind of man falls asleep in the middle of another man's trouser story?"

"Sorry," Freddie said again. "It's just having a baby really takes its toll on your sleep schedule; I'm surprised I can comprehend _anything _you say. I think I got three hours last night…and that's actually pretty good!"

"Yeah, you know, you do have some pretty gross-looking circles under your eyes," Gibby nodded.

Before Gibby could reply, Sam came into the room with Jason in her arms.

"Hey, baby," she said. "I need to run out and pick up some more diapers for Jason. You want me to bring him with me or are you gonna keep hanging out here?"

"I'll watch him," Freddie said, and Sam set the infant down in his lap. "We'll have fun together, won't we Jason?"

"Alright, I should be back in an hour," Sam said, giving her husband a quick kiss. "I'll pick up something for dinner while I'm out. Later, Gibwad."

Freddie waited until Sam had left before turning to Gibby. "Man, did you _see _that?"

"I know! How many times do I have to tell her it's pronounced _Gibby_?"

"No! Not that!" Freddie said. "Did you see how she just waltzed in here and totally ignored that Pottery Barrel bag?"  
"Oh yeah, you know, you should probably move that," Gibby said. "It's making the room a little unsightly. See, I watching some Oprah reruns the other day, and she said that clutter like that in a room can really-"

"Oh I am _not _moving it!" Freddie said. "Nope, no way! I'm sick of being the one who always has to move the bags!"

"What do you mean?" Gibby frowned.

"I mean our whole relationship, Sam's always been able to get me to do whatever she wants," Freddie said. "She gets me to make our bed every morning, she gets me to do all the vacuuming, she gets me to lug all her bags through the mall and throw out my back! Well you know what? The bus stops here!"

"Dude, you really _are _sleep deprived," Gibby said. "There's no bus."

"It's a metaphor!" Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "I means I'm putting my foot down and I'm not going to be a doormat for my wife anymore. I'm a father now; I can't let my son see my get pushed around by my wife, he'll think I'm a total whimp!"

"But you are a total whimp."

"Gibby!" Freddie snapped. He looked back at the bag. "It won't kill Sam to actually pick up a bag and bring it up to our room where it goes. I mean I love her, but she needs to start sharing the responsibility around here."

"But it's Sam," Gibby said. "You can't win anything against her."

"Oh yes I can!" Freddie said. "She's going to move that bag…and I'm gonna make sure of it. Give me one of your socks."

"What are you going to do?" Gibby asked as he kicked off his loafers.

"Just giving myself a little bit of an edge," Freddie grinned as he tried not to puke at the stench of Gibby's feet. "See, ever since she had Jason, her hormones are still a little wacky, and she still has a really strong sense of smell. If I plant this stink bomb in the bag, it will annoy her to no end and she'll _have _to move the bag if she wants to get rid of it."

"Hey, my socks only smell like that because I have a condition that makes my feet sweat more than usual," Gibby said.

"Well your abnormal feet have just helped me out a lot, Gib," Freddie said triumphantly as he dropped the sock into the bag.

….

"Okay, Jason, you're all fed and changed. Now don't you want to take a tiny little nap so mommy can sit down?" Sam said as she gently bounced the fussing infant in her arms. "Please?"

But the infant continued to cry as Sam walked into the living room.

"Well it was worth a try," Sam sighed. "At least I know you got my yelling skills. That will come in handy one-Ugh! What's that _smell_?"

She quickly checked Jason's diaper again. "No…Okay, what is that? It smells like two fish died in a sewer in the middle of July!"

She walked around the room, trying to find the scent. As she approached the Pottery Barrel bag, she was almost knocked off her feet by the stench, and she carefully knelt down and looked inside it.

"What is-This is Gibby's _sock_!" Sam exclaimed, pulling the source of smell out. "What is this doing in-Oh…that _nub_! He thinks _this _is gonna make him win! I grew up in the same house of my mom! I can _handle _disgusting smells! You know what, Jason? This means war. Daddy's going to learn that he can't win against mommy this easily…"

…

"Happy National _Galaxy Wars _day, baby!" Freddie said brightly a few days later, coming into the living room wearing his Nug Nug T-shirt.

"That's not even a real holiday," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"It's the twenty-year anniversary of the final movie release; it's a big day!" Freddie said. "And to celebrate I'm going to sit here on this couch, eat my special caramel corn and watch my entire DVD set of the trilogy. Today's gonna be a good day. It's gonna be-Hey! Where are my DVDs? They were here by the T.V. last night!"

"Hmm…interesting," Sam said, smiling to herself. "I wonder where they could've gone then."

"I don't think I moved them," Freddie frowned, beginning to look around the living room. "Where could they-"

He stopped in midsentence as he passed the Pottery Barrel bag and spotted the corner of the DVD case sticking out of it.

_Oh she __**didn't!**_ Freddie thought to himself as he quickly grabbed the case. He opened it up and found that the discs were missing.

Suddenly, he spotted a glimmer coming from something showing from underneath the bag.

Freddie's mouth fell open as he realized what his wife had done. She had put his discs underneath the bag. If he wanted to get them…he was going to have to _move _it.

"Did you find your DVDs, baby?" Sam asked sweetly from the couch.

"Alright, Sam, that tares it!" Freddie said, stomping back over to her. "You-You-Move that bag!"

"No way!" Sam said, getting to her feet. "You want your DVDs for your nubby holiday? You're gonna have to move it!"

"No, Sam! I move all the bags! It's _your _turn for once!"

"Not gonna happen!" Sam said, planting her hands on her hips.

"Oh you get over here and move it!" Freddie said, putting his hands around her and lifting her up, as she had done to him so many times when she was younger.

"Put me down, Benson!" Sam yelled, punching his arm. "I'm not moving that bag!"

"Yes you are, _Benson_!" Freddie said, struggling as Sam freed herself from his hold and quickly jumped on his back, toppling him to the ground.

"Pick up that bag!"

"No! You do it!"

"No! You-"

"_Enough_!"

Sam and Freddie untangled themselves and looked up to see Carly standing behind them, her arms crossed as she glared at them. "You two are _insane_!"

"She's the insane one!" Freddie snapped.

"I'm not the one who used Gibby's sock as a weapon!"

"You took my DVDs on the most important day of the year!"

"Stop!" Carly yelled again, causing Sam and Freddie to fall quiet. She stepped over to them and picked up the bag, causing both of them to gasp. "There! _I'm _moving this bag! Honestly, you two, if I didn't know any better, I'd think you were _children_! What sort of adults argue about moving a _bag_? Sam, you don't always have to be the one in control in this relationship. Freddie, you don't have to be so stubborn about your principles! You know, this behavior was ridiculous in high school, but now? You guys have a _baby_! Maybe you two should think about setting an example about how to act for Jason next time you get into one of your stupid little arguments!"

And with that she headed upstairs, still carrying the bag.

"Wow," Freddie sighed, helping Sam to her feet. "I-I guess she has a point…maybe we did get a little immature about the bag."

"Yeah, maybe a little," Sam agreed.

Freddie gave her a small smile. "I'm sorry."  
Sam smiled back. "Me too."

She leaned forward and gave him a quick kiss.

"Although…if you would've just moved the bag in the first place…" she said.

"Me?" Freddie exclaimed. "Why me? You have arms!"

"So do you!"

"You know what, Sam?"

"What, Frednub?"

"You're-ugh!"

"Ugh!"


	472. Chapter 472

**AN-This chapter is a sequel to chapter 404, where it told iOMG with the roles reversed. So this chapter is basically iLost My Mind with Sam and Freddie's roles reversed.**

…**.**

_Pope_

"Okay, _where _is Freddie?" Carly groaned as her and Sam sat up in the iCarly studio three days after the lock-in. "I haven't seen him in like…_days_!"

"Oh, um…I dunno," Sam mumbled, not meeting Carly's gaze. She hadn't told her best friend about Freddie's spontaneous kiss yet. Ever since Freddie ran off from the courtyard after the two pulled apart, she had been trying nonstop to get in contact with him. She had called him, texted him, emailed him…she had even picked the locks on his apartment door only to find his bedroom empty.

"He hasn't called you or anything about the project you were working on during the lock-in?" Carly asked.

Sam shook her head. "No…no, he-he hasn't."  
Carly gave her a strange look. "You okay, Sam? You look like something's bugging you."

"Huh? Nothing's bugging me," Sam said quickly.

"Sam…" Carly said knowingly. "I know you…something's bothering you. Come on, you can tell me."

Sam sighed. She knew once Carly got started on this sort of thing, there was no getting her to drop it. It'd be easier just to come clean now.

"Alright," Sam said slowly. "It's…I-I sort of know what's going on with Freddie."

"You do?" Carly said. "What is it? Wait…you didn't hurt him or anything during the lock-in, did you?"

"No!" Sam said. "_I _didn't do anything. Look, you know how him and I, well, mostly him, were working on making that emotion reading app?"

"Sure," Carly nodded.

"Well, I tested it out on him, and it showed his mood as 'in love'."

"What?" Carly exclaimed. "Freddie's in love? With _who_?"

"Well I _thought_ it was you," Sam replied. "You know, because he's always been chasing you around and everything."

"Oh man," Carly sighed. "He's still in love with me? _That's _why he's suddenly dropped off the face of the earth? Poor guy…I wish he'd come over so I could talk to him and let him off easy and-"

"He's not in love with you, Carly," Sam cut her off.

"Huh? Then who's he-"

"During the night, Freddie went out to the patio, and he was all mopey," Sam said. "I figured it was still because of the computer app thing and him being in love with you…So I decided since he was being so cool about me sort of slacking off during the project, I'd go try and cheer him up. But her-he…he kissed me!"

"He _kissed _you?" Carly gasped. "Oh my God!"

"I know," Sam nodded. "I was just talking and then he…did it."

"Well what does this mean?" Carly asked, going into full gossip mode. "Does he like you then? Do you like him back?"

"I don't know what it means!" Sam said. "Before I could say anything to him he just bolted! He didn't even grab his laptop or anything. Who knew the nub could run so fast…"

"Well what are you going to do?" Carly urged.

"I don't know!" Sam exclaimed. "How can I do anything where I don't even know where Fredwad _is_? It's not like I can just track him down and-Wait…wait, I think I know how we can find him."

"How?" Carly asked anxiously as Sam pulled out her phone and quickly began texting away.

"You know how Freddie has that secret debit card that his mom doesn't know about?" Sam said. "The one that's linked to the account where he's been putting his little eight-dollar-a-month allowance?"

"Yeah," Carly nodded. "So?"

"Well my cousin Mick knows how to track to someone's debit or credit card number with only their name and online account password and find where the last place it was used was," Sam explained.

"You know Freddie's online account password?" Carly frowned.

"Please, Freddie may be a tech genius but he picks the easiest passwords for things," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "He always uses 'WarlordsFan08' for everything. It's really-Yes! My cousin found a hit off his card!"

"That fast?" Carly said, impressed.

"He didn't get sent to prison for stealing two hundred grand from a senator for nothing," Sam smirked. "Alright, he said that the last place Freddie used his debit card was…The Dragon's Lair gaming lounge?"

"Isn't that the hangout spot for only super, _super _huge geeks?" Carly said. "Those kids from school who spend their lunchtime looking for errors in their math books even think that place is lame."

"Well, for _some_ reason Freddie decided to hide out there," Sam said. "Come on, if we get Spencer to drive us we can be there in ten minutes. My cousin said Freddie's transaction was only a couple minutes ago so we should be able to still catch him!"

"Alright, let's go!" Carly agreed.

…

"Okay…this is the _geekiest _place I've ever been in," Sam cringed as her and Carly stepped into the gaming lounge. "It's like the creators of _Galaxy Wars, _role-playing games, and _school_ got together and thought this place up."

"Sam, it's not that bad," Carly sighed as the girls stepped up to the counter.

"Whoa! Female specimens!" a boy standing by the cash register gasped, staring at Carly and Sam. "Our prayers to the overlords have been answered! Would either of you two care to accompany me on an online quest to slay the fiendish beast that guards the kumquat valley of Vindorga?"

"Okay…it's that bad," Carly said.

"Get lost!" Sam snapped, and the boy went scrambling back to his table.

"Here, let's ask that guy if he's seen Freddie," Carly said, nodding over at a worker behind the counter.

"Yo! Dude!" Sam said, catching the man's attention.

"Alright, well, I see our manners talk last week didn't sink in," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Whoa! Are you two lost?" the man asked, in shock from his new customers. "You're girls…and you're not gross looking."

"Can you just tell us if you saw this guy?" Sam asked, holding out her phone and showing him a picture of Freddie.

"Oh yeah…he's there at that back table," the man nodded. "Seriously, do you guys need a map or-"

"There he is!" Carly said, pointing to the back of the lounge. "Oh…Oh my-Oh."

"You've _got _to be kidding me," Sam mumbled as she started towards the table at the very back of the lounge, where she had spotted Freddie.

Freddie was sitting at a table with four other boys, all wearing cloaks and huddled around a board game.

"Okay, Freddie, your turn!" one of the boys said excitedly. "Roll a four or higher and you'll be able to get pass the ogres and be closer to rescuing the Grail of Gravitation. But roll anything lower and you'll be sent to the Forest of Fright."

"Wait! Let me calculate your exact odds for every situation!" another boy said as Freddie picked up the dice.

"No, that's okay," Freddie said. "I think I can-"

"What are you _doing_?" Sam demanded as her and Carly reached the table.

"Sam!" Freddie exclaimed, shocked to see her. "What-What are you-What are you doing here? How did you find me here?"

"Whoa…you know _girls_?" the first boy said, his jaw dropping as he stared up at Carly and Sam. "What are you, some kind of sorcerer?"

"Freddie, what are you doing here?" Carly frowned. "I mean I know you have your nerdy side, but this place is ridiculous! You're hanging out with total geeks! Um…no offense, you guys."

"Oh we're used to it!" the second boy said brightly.

"Yeah, not even _you _should be here!" Sam agreed. "And why aren't you answering any of my calls or texts? I've been trying to talk to you since the-"

"Don't say it!" Freddie hissed.

"Don't tell me what to do!" Sam snapped. "Now will you tell me _why _you-"

"No! Don't!" Freddie said, dropping his dice and covering his ears.

"Okay, I think you two need to have a little chat," Carly said, rolling her eyes at her best friends. "There's an empty booth over there next to the two guys making some sort of shield-looking thingy…Why don't you go sit over there and-"

"No, I'm staying right here to finish my Chambers and Challenges game," Freddie said. "I can't just abandon my quest for the Grail of Gravitation and-"

"_Go _talk with Sam!" Carly said firmly, her voice leaving no room for argument. "I'll take you place in this stupid game…again, um, no offense everyone."

"Whoa! A bosomed new member has joined our quest!" one of the boys said, shocked. "This should be enough to make me a level forty-five Chamber Master."

"Go!" Carly said again, pointing to the empty booth. "I'm sacrificing my sanity for you two…you better appreciate this!"

So with no choice, Sam and Freddie silently walked over to the booth and sat down.

Neither said anything for several minutes before Sam finally broke down.

"Why have you been hiding out _here _for the past three days?" she asked. "You're not as big a nerd as _these _guys. Even if your AV club and Math Team combined it still wouldn't be as bad as this place."

"Because," Freddie sighed. "You're the most obnoxious, aggressive, rude blonde-headed demon I've ever met."

"Well then why'd you kiss me?" she demanded.

"Because I-I like you…" Freddie mumbled, looking down.

"Huh?" Sam frowned. "So-So you _like _me…and you think I'm obnoxious and rude?"

"Now you see why I need to be here?" Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "I've lost my nerdy touch, and that's the only thing I've been able to hold to my name my whole life. I mean what kind of self-respecting nerd likes someone who doesn't know the difference between a gigabyte and a megahertz and thinks Proton Cruisers are a brand of bubble gum?"

"So you decide to move into the geekiest place on Earth?" Sam said.

"These are my people now," Freddie replied. "Clearly I've been spending too much time around regular people and its messed with my brain."

"Wait…are you saying that you kissed me because-because you think you're becoming _less _of a nerd?" Sam asked slowly

"Well obviously!" Freddie said. "I've been giving up watching _Galaxy Wars _commentary, I haven't played War of Warlords in weeks, I haven't updated my tech blog in forever…all because I've been busy thinking of, well…you!"

"Okay, okay…look," Sam said. "Even-Even though you kissed me that night in the lock-in…even-even if you might like me, I promise you…you're still just as big a nerd as you always were!"  
Freddie looked up at her. "You really mean that?"

"Shoosh yeah I do," Sam said. "Clearly I need to start telling you that even more if you're starting to doubt yourself. And here I was thinking I was doing a pretty good job of drilling that into your head all these years."

Freddie let out a small chuckle. "Yeah…you know what? You're right. Let's get out of here; if I never see another Chambers and Challenges game again, it will be too soon."

The two walked back over to Carly, where it looked like she was using all of her will power not to scream in horror as she sat with the other gamers."

"You know, my online medieval fortress has _quite _the moat-side view," one boy was saying to Carly. "Why don't I make you a nice little avatar and have you over for haggis?"

"Oh, um…my-my doctor actually told me to stay away from haggis," Carly laughed nervously. "But thanks for the-"

"Alright, Carls, let's get out of here," Sam said.

"Oh thank God," Carly, said, jumping up, relieved.

"Well, um, guys…" Freddie said to the gamers. "It's been a fun few days. But I need to leave now. Good luck moving into your mom's basement, Craig."

"Wait…you can't go," one boy frowned, standing up.

"What do you mean he can't go? He can do whatever he wants," Sam said. "And he _wants _to listen to us and get his stupid butt out of this loser barn!"

"He's our game maker; he can't just leave in the middle of a quest!" another boy said, jumping up as well.

"Guys, I'm sorry, but I can't stay here any longer," Freddie said. "I have a life to get back to and-"

"Don't say that!" a third boy gasped.

"Okay, seriously everyone, Freddie needs to leave," Carly said. "I'm sure your quests or whatever will be just fine without him. Come on, guys, let's go home and-"

"INITIATE PRISONER LOCKDOWN!" the first boy yelled.

"Initiate what?" Sam scoffed.

But at the boy's words, everybody in the lounge jumped up and stood in front of the door.

"What are you doing?" Freddie asked, confused. "Come on, let me leave."

"No can do," the second boy said, crossing his arms. "We're not going to let one of our own go out into the real world."

"But he has to!" Carly said. "We do iCarly in an hour!"  
"What's iCarly?" the second boy asked.

"It's a comedy web show," Freddie said. "And I'm the tech producer."

"_Comedy_?" the third boy cringed. "Who likes comedy web shows? Everybody knows science fiction and fantasy web shows are the only ones worth watching."

"Hey, I love iCarly!" somebody from the crowd shouted.

"Me too! I love the Bra Who Tells Ghost Stories!"

"Random Dancing is the best!"

"See? Even total geeks like iCarly," Sam said, stepping closer to the boys. "Now…you better let us go or I'm going to make everyone of you bleed all over those precious little cloaks you have on!"

"Sam, wait, you can't hurt them," Freddie said.

"Why not?"

"Because there's a police station right across from here!" he said, pointing out the window.

"Yeah, you're still on probation from the chili dog incident with the Mexican ambassador," Carly nodded. "You'll go back to Juvie if you're caught doing anything again!"

"Well then what are we gonna do?" Sam snapped.

"Okay, look," Freddie said to the boys. "If you're not going to let me leave, can we at least do iCarly from here?"

"Why should we?" the first boy said.

"Hey!"

The teens turned around to see a large boy carrying a staff step forward. "You let them do iCarly…or our peace treaty in Aliens and Asteroids is over."

"But-But that would mean my asteroid community would perish!" the boy stammered. "You wouldn't dare!"

"I've done worse and you know it…"

"I-Okay, fine!" the boy conceded. "You can do iCarly from here!"

…..

"Okay? You girls ready?" Freddie asked an hour later, pointing his camera at Carly and Sam.

"Yup!" Carly smiled.

"I'm about to puke from all the dorkiness in here, but sure," Sam shrugged.

"Alright," Freddie said. "Then in five, four, three, two…"

"Greetings browsers of the web!" Carly said happily. "Thanks for tuning into yet another installment of a wacky, pointless little web show we like to call-"

"iCarly!" both girls finished simultaneously.

"Now," Sam continued. "You might be wondering why we're not doing iCarly from our normal location. Well, the answer is quite simple…a bunch of pus-headed losers have trapped us in the geekiest place in Seattle and won't let us leave!"

"We're being held against our will!" Carly finished happily. "But no worries, you'll still get to enjoy iCarly tonight. We have some great stuff line up for you guys!"

"I'm going to make a meatball sculpture of the pope!" Sam said proudly.

"Yes…it will be a real treat," Carly said. "But first, we're gonna do something _else_."

"Something else?" Sam frowned, confused.

"What do you mean? We added something?" Freddie asked.

"Yes," Carly smiled. "Now you see, the _reason _we're currently being held prisoner by a bunch of geeks is because our tech producer _Freddie_, thinks that it's totally crazy for someone like him to like someone like Sam because he's, well, a little on the nerdy side and Sam's pretty much the total opposite."

"Carly?" Freddie said slowly. "What-What are you doing?"

"Shh!" Carly hushed him. "Anyway, since Freddie thinks him liking Sam is totally weird-"

"It _is_!" Freddie hissed.

"Let's here what you guys, the fans of iCarly have to say," Carly said, running over to Freddie's laptop. "Oh, we have our first viewer calling in. Alright, here's Bugjuice38!"

"Carly I don't think-" Sam started, but Carly pressed a few keys and a young teen's face popped up on the screen.

"Hi Bugjuice38!" Carly smiled.

"Hi!" the girl replied.

"So," Carly said. "Do _you _think it's weird for someone like Freddie to fall for someone like Sam?"

"No way!" the girl said. "Sam and Freddie would make an _awesome_ couple! They go together so well!"

"There you go!" Carly said triumphantly. "Thanks for chatting! Okay, next we have…GoopyGilbert."

She pressed a few more keys and a man took the girl's place on the screen.

"Hey there GopyGilbert," Carly said. "So do you think-"

"Seddie!" the man yelled loudly.

"So…you think Sam and Freddie _should _be together then?" Carly asked.

"Seddie!" the man nodded. "Seddie!"

"Well I think he made his point," Carly said. "Now let's hear from-"

"No! No more!" Freddie said firmly. "I don't care if people think it's not weird for me to fall for Sam. I know it is and-"

"Hey…let's take one more call," Sam said slowly. "Carly, take Fredwad's camera."

"What? No, Sam-" Freddie started, but Sam cut him off by taking his camera and handing it to Carly.

"You be nice," Carly warned.

Sam nodded as she stepped in front of the camera. "Um…hey there," she began. "So a lot of people have been talking about whether it makes sense for _Freddie _to like me. They've been talking about what _Freddie _feels. But no one's come to _me _yet…"

"We talked," Freddie mumbled.

"No, _you _talked while Carly was mauled by Chamber losers," Sam corrected. She looked back at the camera. "Sure, normally I say it doesn't matter how Freddie feels, but here I guess it _is _sort of important…but so is how I feel."

"Okay, this is enough!" Freddie said. "Just get it over with, Puckett! Just go ahead and turn me down live on the web! It wouldn't be the first time you did something to completely humiliate-"

He was cut off as Sam stepped over to him, grabbing his shoulders and kissing him deeply on the lips.

Gasps were heard around the lounge and Carly smiled happily at her two friends.

When Sam and Freddie pulled apart, Freddie gave her a questioning glance. "You-You mean that?"

"I do," Sam smiled. "We may be really different…but that's what works for both of us."

"Well…now what?" Freddie asked.

The two stared at each other for a moment before GoopyGilbert, who was still on the screen, let out a loud yell. "Seddie!"

Carly chuckled as she turned the camera to herself. "And…goodnight."


	473. Chapter 473

_Mechanics_

"Hey! Who drank all my eggnog?" Sam exclaimed, taking an empty carton from the fridge. "I told everybody in this house it was off limits!"

"Sorry, I got thirsty," seventeen-year old Emma said, coming into the kitchen. "Hey, are there anymore of those Christmas cookies left?"

"Oh, so you're going to finish those too?" Sam said, rolling her eyes as her daughter grabbed the plate of cookies from the counter.

"You know, you remember how I told you one day Karma would come around and get you back for eating all of _my _food when you were a kid?" Spencer said, looking up from the gingerbread house him, Carly, Clarissa and Ashton were working on at the table. "Well there it is! Revenge tastes pretty bitter, doesn't it?"

"Oh shut up!" Sam snapped.

"Okay, I think I finally got the last of this dang mistletoe down!" Freddie said, joining the others in the kitchen. "I swear, there must've been five pounds of this stuff hung around here."

"Hey! I spent an hour hanging that all up this morning," Carly said. "I thought it would look festive for the big Christmas Eve dinner tonight."

"Oh no, no, no," Freddie said, shaking his head. "I will _not_ have all this stuff around the house."  
"Wait, dad? You took all the mistletoe down?" Jason frowned as he came into the kitchen with everybody else. "Eileen is going to be here in an hour!"

"Yeah, and _Quincy _will be here any minute," Freddie said. "Do you want this stuff hanging around as an excuse for him and your little sister to be _kissing _all night?"

"Ugh, yeah, take that junk down," Jason cringed.

"You're insane," Sam said, shaking her head as she checked on the large ham in the oven.

"Don't worry baby, I saved some mistletoe for us," Freddie smiled.

"Oh lucky me," Sam smirked, rolling her eyes. She turned to Ashton at the table. "Ash? Did you and Emma clean out your room and set up the camping bed for Nicole? Melanie just texted me and said they'll be here soon."

"Yeah, it's all set up, mom," Ashton nodded. "I'm so glad Nicole's finally visiting again. She always brings the cutest outfits and lets me borrow them."

"And the pullout bed is all ready for us tonight too," Freddie told her.

"Okay," Sam said. "Though I don't know why _Melanie _and Cody can't sleep out there. It's our house!"

"Because they're our _guests _and it's the polite thing to do," Freddie said. "Now then, I need to get back outside."

"Why?" Clarissa asked. "It's snowing like crazy."

"He's trying to make sure our house has the best Christmas decorations this year," Ashton said, rolling her eyes. "He's been going crazy doing the lights and inflatable Santa's and all this other chiz."

"Wait! I wanna help!" Spencer said, jumping up.

"I thought you were making this gingerbread house with us," Carly pointed out.

"Yeah, but electrical stuff is so much more fun," Spencer said.

"That's the spirit!" Freddie said brightly. "Come on, I need to take another look at some of the mechanics on the singing snowman on the roof."

"You realize your house is going to be burned down any minute, right?" Carly said to Sam as Freddie and Spencer hurried outside.

"I'll go get the fire extinguisher ready," Sam sighed.

…..

"Sam!"

"Hey, Melanie," Sam said as her twin sister threw her arms around her. "Glad you could make it for Christmas…even if it does mean I have to spend the next week on the uncomfortable sofa bed."

"What was that?" Melanie asked.

"Nothing," Sam said quickly. "Hey Cody, hey Nicole."

"Hey, thanks for having us," Melanie's husband replied, giving Sam a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Yeah, I heard the shopping is _great _in Seattle this time of year," Melanie's twenty-year old daughter, Nicole nodded.

"Right?" Ashton grinned as her and Emma hugged their cousin. "We'll have to hit all the after-Christmas sales this weekend. Oh, and _where _did you get your hair done? I love it! And how's the modeling work been? Have you been in anymore magazines? Is it super fun? Do you get to keep all the clothes?"

"Jeez, let her breathe, you sound like some stupid groupie," Emma said.

"Nicole actually just found she's going to be featured in next month's _Swimsuit Monthly _issue," Melanie said proudly.

"Wow, that's…impressive," Sam said.

"Yes, it's lovely," Cody said, much less enthusiastically than his wife.

"Oh, it's no big deal," Nicole said modestly.

"So where's Freddie and the boys?" Melanie asked.

"Freddie's on the roof with Spencer trying to decorate every square inch of our chimney," Sam said. "And Jason and Tyler are…I dunno. Ashton, go get your brothers."

"Jason! Tyler! Get down here! Ashton yelled loudly.

"I meant go _find _them," Sam said. "Not break everyone's eardrums!"

"Well you should've been more specific then," Ashton shrugged.

"There my nephews are!" Melanie grinned as Jason and Tyler came downstairs.

"Hi, Aunt Melanie," the boys said as Melanie gave them each hugs.

"Alright, I have Christmas Eve presents for everyone to open before tomorrow morning," Melanie said excitedly.

"Really?" Tyler exclaimed. "You're the best, Aunt Melanie!"

"Hey, Nicole," Jason said. "You'll never guess what I found up in the attic last night…that old board game we used to play all the time when we were little!"

"No way, Candytopia?" Nicole grinned.

"Uh-huh!"

"Oh my God, we have to play that later!" Nicole laughed. "That was our favorite!"

"Jason, why don't you help these three bring their bags upstairs?" Sam said. "I need to get back in the kitchen and check on my ham."

"I'll be down to help you in a minute," Melanie said as Jason and Cody began to pick up all the suitcases. "I have a secret technique that can drain almost half the fat from any ham!"

"Yes…that's exactly what I want for Christmas," Sam mumbled as Melanie, Nicole, Cody and Jason started upstairs. "A healthy ham."

"I can't believe Jason!" Ashton said, crossing her arms. "He's stealing my cool cousin from me!"

"I'm pretty sure Nicole is his cousin too, genius," Emma pointed out.

"Yeah, but he doesn't appreciate her style and fashion wisdom like _I _do," Ashton pouted.

"Come on, Nicole and Jason used to hang out together all the time when she still lived in Seattle," Sam said. "They're really close."

"Not shopping close," Ashton muttered.

"Come on, come help me with the potatoes, Ash," Sam said. "They're your favorite."  
"Fine," Ashton sighed.

"Em, Tyler? Wanna help too?" Sam asked.

"Nope," both teens said at once.

"Of course," Sam nodded.

"Man, where _is _Quincy?" Emma said, flopping down on the couch next to Tyler.

"Can't you go two seconds without making out with your boyfriend?" Tyler cringed.

"Can't you go two seconds without looking like a moron?" Emma snapped.

Just then there was a knock at the door and Emma jumped to her feet.

"That must be them! It's about time!" Emma said, quickly opening the door.

Before she could even say a simple hello to her boyfriend, though, Quincy's younger brothers, Huey and Kirby, shoved their way in, almost toppling Emma over.

"Hey! Watch it, dorks!" Emma said.

"Yeah! Don't trample my girlfriend you two!" Quincy said as him and his parents came inside.

"Alright! I brought my special Christmas hash browns!" Gibby said happily.

"Christmas hash browns?" Emma repeated, confused.

"Don't ask," Quincy sighed.

"Where are your parents?" Tasha asked politely.

"My mom's in the kitchen with Ashton and Aunt Carly and my dad's on the roof," Emma replied.

"What? Freddie promised me if he ever went on the roof he'd call me!" Gibby gasped. "He knows I love roof bonding!"

He quickly shoved his plate of hash browns into his wife's arms before darting back outside.

"I thought you told me Clarissa and her mom spent all day today covering this place in mistletoe," Quincy said to Emma as Tasha headed into the kitchen.

"My dad took it all down," Emma told him. "But that's okay…we don't need some stupid plant to do this."

She stood on her toes and gave him a gentle kiss.

"Gross!" Tyler gagged.

"Get a room!" Kirby echoed.

"You guys are lucky it's Christmas and mom made me promise not to hurt any of you!" Emma said, glaring at the three boys. She turned back to Quincy. "Come on, let's go upstairs. I did manage to save _one _thing of mistletoe."

"Sweet," Quincy grinned as Emma took his hand and led him upstairs.

"Those two are disgusting," Tyler said as his sister and Quincy disappeared upstairs.

"Yeah, yeah sure," Huey said quickly. "Now where is she, dude?"

"Where's who?" Tyler frowned, confused.

"Your hot cousin, Nicole!" Kirby said. "We heard she's going to be in _Swimsuit Monthly_!"

"Oh, she's upstairs with Jason," Tyler said.

"Well tell her to come down! We've been waiting all day to come over and see her!" Huey said anxiously

"So you guys have been waiting all day to come hit on my _cousin_?" Tyler said. "You're both pathetic!"

"She's a model!" Kirby defended.

"Yeah, and so is your _mom_," Tyler smirked.  
"Ugh! Did you have to do that to us?" Huey groaned. "Now for the next week every time I see a model, all I'm going to be able to think about is my mom. Thanks a lot, Tyler! You know we try to forget that our mom is a…_that_!"

"Yeah! You know, the kids of models have it so hard," Kirby said. "Other guys get to drool over models all they want. But we get images of our moms when we do it!"

"Get over it," Tyler said. "Hey, my dad just shoveled our driveway. Wanna go try and do skate tricks outside?"

"Your driveway was _frozen_, we had to park on the street," Huey pointed out.

"Yes, which means we'll have less resistance for tricks," Tyler said as if it was obvious. "Now come on!"

"Okay," Huey and Kirby shrugged.

Just as Tyler opened his front door, though, he was met by Jason's girlfriend, Eileen, in mid-knock.

"Oh, hi Eileen," Tyler said. "Hey, did you bring pies from your parents shop?"

"Yup!" Eileen smiled.

"Did you bring the key lime?"

"Of course," Eileen chuckled. "Anyway, where's Jason?"

"Upstairs," Tyler replied.

"With the model," Huey mumbled enviously.

Eileen raised an eyebrow. "Um, what?"

"Yeah, he should be down soon, though," Tyler said. "We're going out to skate. See you, Eileen!"

"Um, okay…bye," Eileen said.

….

"You realize how uncomfortable that sofa bed is?" Sam said angrily as she tossed frozen rolls on a tray. "My back is going to be _killing _me."

"Well you can always come over and stay in our guest room," Carly offered as her and Clarissa and Tasha worked on the yams.

"Nah, Freddie won't go for that," Sam mumbled. "He's still going with this 'she's your sister and our guest' thing."

"I thought you were glad Melanie was coming to visit," Carly said.

"I am," Sam sighed. "But I want _my _bed. With my fluffy pillows and warm blanket and soft, non-springy mattress. You know, we should be kicking the kids out of their room and pushing them to sleep on that couch! Tyler's got the youngest back; I say he goes on the sofa bed and Freddie and I squeeze onto his bed."

"So you're going to push your child out of his own room?" Carly said, amused.

"It's called _parenting_," Sam corrected, opening one of the cabinet. "Alright! I had a bag of pork rinds in here. Where are they?"

"Emma finished them," Ashton replied.  
"What?" Sam exclaimed. "She ate the whole bag? That's it! I swear, living with that kid is like living with a-a-a-"

"A _you_?" Carly offered helpfully.

"Yes!" Sam nodded. "How did you put up with me eating all your food? It's the worst! I mean I buy myself fancy cream sodas, Emma drinks them. I get chocolate donuts, Emma eats them all. I get fried chicken and it's gone before it even gets to the table!"

"Well just send Jason and Nicole out to go get more pork rinds," Ashton mumbled. "You know, since they're best friends now."

"Ashton…cool it, I'm sure Nicole will go shopping with you while she's here," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "And take you to do model stuff. But let her and Jason spend some time together too and-"

"Hi, Mrs. Benson," Eileen said, coming into the kitchen. "Tyler let me in."

"Oh, hi Eileen," Sam smiled. "Glad you could come. Jason's upstairs right now, but I'll go get him for you."

"Yeah, he's upstairs probably getting to hear all about how the _Swimsuit Monthly _photo shoot was," Ashton said.

"Hey, Aunt Tasha, you were in that magazine too, weren't you?" Clarissa said.

"Oh yeah," Tasha nodded. "It was a lot of fun! I remember one time Gibby surprised me in the middle of the shoot and we-"

"Hey, it is Christmas Eve!" Sam said. "No one wants to hear that!"

"Um, so who-who's this model Jason's hanging out with?" Eileen asked, giving a weak chuckle.

"Oh, don't worry, it's just-" Sam started, but she was interrupted by Freddie calling to her from outside.

"Sam! Sam come look at my masterpiece of a roof!" Freddie said proudly.

"Ugh, let me go see the damage," Sam sighed. "Ashton, go get Jason and tell him Eileen is here."

"Fine," Ashton agreed. "Even though he stole my-"

"Just go!"

Sam headed outside, shivering as the cold wind wrapped around her body. "Alright, nub, let's see this before I get frostbite. Where are you?"

"I told you, on the roof!" Freddie called again, and Sam looked up to see her husband, Spencer and Gibby all standing on their now fully-decorated roof.

"What? So you put some more lights up?" Sam shrugged, clearly unimpressed.

"Oh, we did a lot more than put lights up!" Spencer said.

"Yeah, hold onto your socks, this is _awesome_," Gibby said. "_And _we got some roof bonding out of it."

"Er, yeah," Freddie said slowly. "Let me just plug this stuff in and then prepare to be amazed, baby!"

"I'd rather be warm!" Sam yelled back up. "Hurry it up so I can go back inside and-"

"Watch out, mom!" Tyler said, whizzing past her on his skateboard, crashing into a pile of snow. "Whoa! That was awesome!"

"Tyler!" Sam cried. "What are you _doing_?"

"We're just skating," the thirteen-year old replied, getting up and brushing the snow off himself.

"On the _frozen _driveway?" Sam exclaimed. "You three are going to break a leg or something!"

"But we're being careful," Huey said.

"Ha! Last week you three tried to tie your sleds to the back of my car while I was on my way to the grocery store," Sam scoffed. "You guys don't know the definition of careful!"

She looked back up at the roof. "Yo! Fredwad! Gibson! Weren't you paying attention to your kids up there? Why do I have to be the responsible one and tell them not to do stupid things? You know that goes against everything I believe in!"

"Huh? Oh…Tyler, stop doing…whatever it was you were doing," Freddie said quickly. "Okay, Sam, you ready? In five, four, three, two…ta-da!"

The roof suddenly lit up, giving life to one of the most remarkable light displays Sam had seen.

"Wow," she grinned. "That _is _pretty cool. And Spencer didn't set anything on fire!"

"I know! The fire department would be so proud!" Spencer said. "If they were still taking my calls…"

"Yeah, this really is impressive," Gibby said proudly. "See what a little roof bonding will do? I say we do this every weekend and-"

"Um…no, let's-let's not," Freddie said. "Hey, Sam? Why don't you go get Emma? She's the one who picked out these lights at the store; she should see them in action!"

"I think she's busy upstairs with Quincy," Sam replied.

"Wait, _what_?" Freddie yelped. "Busy doing _what_? Sam! Why are you letting our daughter upstairs by herself with her boyfriend?"

"Oh relax, I'm sure they're just making out," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"That does_ not _make me feel any better!" Freddie snapped.

"Dude, it's okay, I bought Quincy some new chapstick," Gibby assured him.

"I don't care about Quincy's chapped lips!" Freddie said. "I _care _about the fact that they're all over my daughter!"

"Hey, his lips aren't chapped! That's what the chapstick was for."

"Tyler! Kirby! Huey!" Freddie yelled down to the kids, ignoring Gibby's comment. "Go do your job as annoying little siblings and bug those two!"

"But we want to stay outside!" Tyler moaned.  
"Go annoy your sister and Quincy and I'll pay you each five bucks," Freddie said.

"Done!" Tyler said. "Come on, guys. We can go test out my new slingshot."

"You're the father-of-the-year, baby," Sam said, shaking her head. "Now will you three get down from there? Dinner's almost ready and I will _not _eat cold ham."

"Yeah, be down in a sec," Freddie said, heading towards the ladder. "Let me just try and steady this thing so I can-Ah!"

As he was starting down the ladder, his foot skipped a ring and he tumbled down into the snow.

"Whoa, Freddie! Are you alright?" Sam gasped, rushing over to her husband.

"Dude! You fell!" Spencer yelled, still on the roof.

"Yeah! I noticed!" Freddie snapped, wincing in pain as he slowly sat up. "Ah! My back!"

"Do you think you broke anything?" Sam asked, concerned.

"No," Freddie said, still cringing in pain. "I think I just threw out my back. Ah! Yup, the back's thrown out."

"Okay, here, let's get you inside and I'll get some ice for you," Sam said. "And some pain pills that-wait a minute…baby, this is great!"

"Well I'm glad you think so!" Freddie said as Gibby and Spencer jumped down from the ladder and joined the couple.

"No, I mean this is the perfect excuse for us to push Melanie and Cody onto the sofa bed while they're here!" Sam grinned. "You can't sleep on that contraption with a hurt back! Yes, Mama gets her own bed back! Aw, thank you for getting hurt, Fredward."

"Don't mention it," Freddie said bitterly as Spencer helped him to his feet. "Glad I could play a part in making sure you get a good nights rest while I spend the night withering in pain!"

"Oh man up, you'll be fine," Sam said, beginning to rub his back. "See, I'll give you a nice massage and you'll feel better. But still pretend your back hurts so Melanie and Cody won't have any choice but to give us the bed back."

"Hey, can I get a massage next?" Gibby asked. "I've been having a lot of tension between the vertebrae lately."

"I wouldn't touch your back with a ten-foot pole," Sam said simply. She turned back to Freddie. "Feel any better, baby?"

"Yeah, a little, actually," Freddie nodded. "If you could just go a little higher and-"

"Sam!" Carly said, sticking her head out the door. "Your ham's ready to come out of the oven!"

"Finally!" Sam said excitedly, quickly abandoning her husband's back. "Dinner time! Let's move, boys!"

"Wait, Sam I can't-ugh!" Freddie moaned as Sam ran inside.

"Well, at least you have us!" Spencer said brightly. "Don't worry, Fred-O. We'll help you inside."

"Yeah, the roof gang needs to stick together," Gibby nodded.

"Please, _never _call us that again," Freddie winced.

…

"Look at this beauty," Sam said as she slid the large ham out of the oven. "Man I can't wait to dig in."

"It looks good, Mrs. Benson," Eileen said. "It looks even better than this dish I saw on-"

"Hey, Eileen!" Jason said, coming into the kitchen with Nicole behind him. "I was wondering where you were."

"Oh," Eileen said, crossing her arms. "Too busy with your new model friend to realize I've been here for half-an-hour?"

"Model friend?" Jason frowned. "You mean Nicole?"

"Hi!" Nicole said to Eileen. "Are you Jason's girlfriend? It's so nice to meet you."

"Yeah, I bet," Eileen snapped.

"Huh?" Nicole said, confused.

"Wait, Eileen, I think you must be confused," Jason said. "See, Nicole is my-"

"No, no, you can be friends with as many models as you want," Eileen said coldly. "I wouldn't want to get in the way of your social life."

"Um, shouldn't you help Jason out?" Carly said to Sam as they watched Jason try and point out that Nicole was his cousin.

"Nah, this is pretty entertaining," Sam grinned as Freddie slowly shuffled into the kitchen.

"Chair, chair…I need a chair," Freddie said, lowering himself into his seat quickly. "Ah…that's better."

"What happened to you?" Carly asked.

"He fell off the roof," Spencer said simply.

"What?" Carly exclaimed.

"It was great, I'm gonna get to sleep so well tonight," Sam said happily.

"Yes, yes, that's _wonderful_," Freddie said. "Now where is everybody? My back feels like it got run over by a freight train and I just want to have a nice relaxing Christmas Eve meal without any stress and-"

"Dad!" Emma yelled, storming into the kitchen with Tyler, Kirby, Huey, and Quincy behind her. "You sent the Three Stooges up to my room to bug me and Quincy? What's your problem?"

"Hey, Quince? Did the new chapstick hold up?" Gibby asked his son.

"Gibby!" Freddie snapped.

"Hey, Nicole?" Ashton said, coming up to her cousin with Clarissa. "So I was thinking the day after Christmas, you, me and Clarissa could go to the mall and get our nails done. I'm sure you know all sorts of cool designs to get done. You know, once you're done spending time with Jason. I know you guys are really close and all, but-"

"Not that close!" Jason said quickly, catching sight of his girlfriend's face. "Or yeah, we're close, but she's my cousin!"

"Wait, she's your cousin?" Eileen frowned.

"Yes! That's what I've been trying to tell you!" Jason nodded. "See, now don't you feel better and not-Ow!"

Eileen swatted Jason's shoulder. "Well why did you let me think she was just some random model chick you were flirting with? Huh?"

"What? What are you talking about? That doesn't even make sense!" Jason exclaimed. "I just-"

"Son, just apologize and move on," Freddie sighed. "Trust me. It's the only option."

"Wow, everything smells good," Melanie said brightly, coming down with Cody. "Oh, Sam? I didn't realize how comfortable your bed is. It's so nice of you and Freddie to let us stay in it while we're here."

"Yeah…real nice," Sam said. "Freddie will talk to you about that after dinner."

"What? Why me?" Freddie hissed.  
"Okay! Everybody!" Sam yelled loudly, causing the previously chaotic kitchen to go silent. "Time to eat! So everybody sit down and shut up!"

"I call first dibs on the ham!" Emma said as everyone scrambled for his or her seats.

"Nice try, kid," Sam smirked, quickly grabbing the ham plate and helping herself to the largest piece. "But when it comes to ham, I always win."

"You know," Freddie said to Sam as everybody began to dig in. "I've got to say…this has been one of our more peaceful Christmas Eve dinners, don't you think?"

"Yeah," Sam agreed. "A lot better than last year when Gibby brought that armadillo over and it wound up-"

"Don't!" Freddie said quickly. "I never want to think about that again."


	474. Chapter 474

_Permission_

"Hey!" Carly said happily as Freddie opened the door and let her into his and Sam's home. "How goes it?"

"It goes good," Freddie smiled. "Thanks for babysitting. Hopefully Jason won't be too much trouble."

"Oh he's never any trouble," Carly said as the two-year old ran into the room with Sam behind him. "Hi Jason! You ready to have some fun with your Aunt Carly?"

"Fun!" Jason exclaimed as Freddie scooped him up.

"Yeah, I'm sure you guys will have a great time," Freddie said. "Anyway, Sam and I shouldn't be out too long, we'll be back by ten at the latest. Jason's already had his dinner and a bath. Just keep him entertained until eight, and then you can put him to bed."

"No bed!" Jason said firmly.

"Oh, yeah…Jason's in this stage where he doesn't like to _sleep_," Freddie added. "But you'll be fine. Just read to him and he'll knock out within an hour or so."

"Um, alright," Carly nodded. "Oh, I almost forgot. You know that sculpture Spencer just finished making for that new bakery that opened up in the mall? Well, the owners liked it so much that they gave him like, ten dozen free cupcakes. I have some right here for you guys, there's chocolate cream, there's vanilla, there's-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Get those cupcakes out of this house!" Sam cried as Carly pulled out a small box. "Jeez! What are you trying to do to me?"

"Sorry…I didn't know I needed your permission to bring cupcakes over," Carly said. "I thought you loved cupcakes!"

"Not tonight I don't!" Sam said.

"Okay, I'm confused."

"Well, you see, Carly," Freddie sighed. "The steakhouse we're going out to tonight has this…item-"

"It's a sixty-five ounce steak," Sam grinned. "Grilled to perfection with the best seasoning known to man."

"Sixty-five ounces?" Carly repeated, her eyes widening. "That's huge!"

"Yeah," Sam said dreamily. "It is. That's why I've been fasting all day; so I'll have room for it. And the restaurant has this policy where if someone orders it and can eat the entire thing in under an hour, they get it for free _and _their picture goes up on the Wall of Fame. You know what an _honor _that would be?"

"Yeah, it could go right up there on the list with that pie eating contest you won last year," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Thirty pies…that was a good day," Sam smiled.

"You know, you eat insane amounts of food, you had a _kid_ and you frown on any type of physical exercise," Carly frowned. "And I eat salads, never had anything growing inside me and work out twice a week and we can still share clothes…I think I'm doing something wrong here."

"Don't question her metabolism, it's one of the great mysteries of the world," Freddie chuckled.

"What can I say? It's a gift," Sam shrugged. "Anyway, only five people have ever eaten the entire steak, and no woman has even _attempted _it. Mommy's going to make history tonight, Jason!"

"Yay!" Jason smiled.

"Well you won't be making history if we miss our reservation," Freddie said, looking at his watch. "We only have twenty minutes to get there."

"Oh, right," Sam nodded, kissing the top of Jason's head. "Bye, sweetie. Be good for Aunt Carly."

"I good boy!" Jason said proudly.

"Make sure you show Aunt Carly that," Freddie said, setting his son down.

"Relax, go enjoy your massive steak," Carly said. "If it will even fit on your table, that is."

…..

"Alright, for the gentleman, we have the nine-ounce steak with a side of steamed broccoli," Sam and Freddie's waiter said, setting Freddie's small plate in front of him.

"Thank you," Freddie smiled.

"And for the lady, we have the sixty-five ounce 'monster' steak with a side of fries and onion rings," the waiter said, using both hands to lower the giant slab of meat onto the table.

"Oh…look at it!" Sam beamed, grabbing her knife and fork. "It's beautiful. Fredwad, take a picture. I need to remember this moment forever."

"Your hour to eat this entre starts now," the waiter said. "Enjoy."

"Okay, baby, I know you're, like, a champion eater, but there's no way even _you _are going to finish that," Freddie said as Sam began digging in.

"Oh _watch _me," Sam said with her mouth full. "Hey, pass the steak sauce, will you, nub? And don't criticize _my _food when you had to nerve to get a _vegetable _on the same plate as the best steak in Seattle!"

"Just make sure you keep track of your time," Freddie said. "And listen, Sam. I don't want you to feel discouraged if you can't finish this. I mean like you said, you're the first woman to even order this thing. That's a big step right there!"

"I'm going to finish this," Sam said firmly.

"Okay," Freddie said. "Whatever you say…"

…..

"Unbelievable!" Freddie said an hour later as Sam took her last bite of the steak. "You-You _finished _it!"

"Told you," Sam smirked triumphantly, licking up some leftover steak sauce from her plate. "Mama doesn't mess around with her steak! Hey, you gonna finish the rest of yours?"

"You're still hungry?" Freddie laughed, amused as he passed his wife his unfinished steak. "Amazing…baby, you're a _beast_! I don't think I've ever been prouder."

"Yeah, well," Sam said modestly as the couple's waiter came over.

"Wow, you-you really ate that whole steak?" he asked, stunned.

"Shoosh yeah she did," Freddie grinned. "I can't believe my wife is the first woman to eat an entire sixty-five ounce steak…It's like I'm married to a celebrity."

"Dude, calm down, you're acting like a moron," Sam said, though she was blushing.

"Wow, you know, I never thought I'd see a woman manage this," the waiter chuckled. "Most women that come in here are always so concerned with their appearances and get the little lean steaks with no fat or flavor."

"Pfft, she'd never do that," Freddie said. "Sam doesn't care about that stuff. Her motto is: 'More fat, more flavor.'"

"Well, it certainly is refreshing to see a woman who doesn't seem to care about figure," the waiter said, taking the plates out of the way.

"That's what I love about her," Freddie said.

"I'll have our manager come out to get your picture on the wall," the waiter told Sam. "Congratulations."

"Yeah, um, thanks," Sam mumbled, looking down at her lap.

"This is going to be something to tell the grandkids one day, isn't it?" Freddie said. "Seriously, Sam, you should be proud of yourself."

"Um, sure," Sam said softly. "I-I am."

…..

"So did she do it? Did Sam eat the entire steak?" Carly asked later that evening as Sam and Freddie walked back into their house.

"Yes she did!" Freddie said. "It was incredible; it was like I was watching DaVinci paint the Mona Lisa."

"Wow, Sam, congrats!" Carly grinned. "I guess this is one more food feat for you to add to the books."

"Yeah, it was real great," Sam said less-than enthusiastically. "Hey, is Jason still up?"

"Um, no, he went down about an hour ago," Carly said.

"I'm just gonna go check on him," Sam said heavily. "See you tomorrow, Carls,"

"Hey, Freddie, is she okay?" Carly frowned as Sam hurried upstairs.

"Um…I don't know," Freddie said. "I thought she'd be jumping up and down right about now. But ever since we left the restaurant she's been really quiet. Maybe she's just finally feeling how stuffed she must be. She ate over four pounds of steak, after all."

"Yeah, that could take its toll on you," Carly agreed. "Well, I should get home. I'll see you later."

"Will do, thanks again for watching Jason," Freddie said.

He waited until Carly had left before heading upstairs to his and Sam's bedroom, where Sam was standing by the dresser, taking out her earrings.

"So you think you'll ever tackle that steak again?" Freddie asked, coming up behind her and wrapping his arms around her. "I mean maybe in a few months you can go back. No one's ever eaten that whole thing twice, and-"

"Okay, I get it, I ate the whole steak!" Sam snapped. "Do we have to keep talking about it? Jeez!"

"Um, Sam? What's wrong?" Freddie asked, confused.

"Nothing!"

"No…something," Freddie said. "Seriously, you've been a little off since we left the restaurant. Are you starting to feel sick from the steak or something?"

"No! I'm fine, okay?" Sam said. "I'm just gonna go to bed."

"Wait, Sam, I'm really worried; what's bugging you?" Freddie asked. "You just ate the largest steak in the country! You should be thrilled!"

"Let's just forget about that, okay?" Sam sighed. "Come on let's get some sleep. Jason will be up at the crack of dawn wanting to play."

"No, I'm not going to sleep until you tell me what's wrong," Freddie said firmly.

Sam looked down at her feet. "It's nothing…really."

"If it's nothing, just tell me."

Sam bit the corner of her lip and let out a heavy sigh. "Fine…Do you think that…Does it bother you that-Do you think I need to start watching what I eat more?"

Freddie's eyes widened. "Huh?"

"I mean, come on, you heard that waiter; most girls barely eat any steak in that restaurant," Sam said. "And later everybody kept coming up to me and said how nice it was that I didn't seem to care about my figure."  
"Well…you don't, do you?" Freddie said slowly.

"God, Freddie! You're so _stupid_!" Sam groaned. "_Yes_ I care about my figure, okay? There, I said it!"

"But-But Sam…you look fine," Freddie said, still confused. "You're perfect."

"Yeah, now I look fine," Sam mumbled. "But what if one day I wake up and all those giant steaks and hams and Fat Cakes suddenly catch up to me? I mean it's amazing I'm not the size of a house now!"

"I-I never knew this bothered you so much, Sam," Freddie said softly. "Have-Have you always felt this way?"

"I-No," Sam said heavily. "It's just lately I keep hearing everybody tell me how lucky I am that I can eat whatever I want and how it's nice that I don't seem to care about how it affects me. But…I do care. I-I care about looking good for you. And-And I dunno, maybe it's time I actually put effort into that."

"Sam…that's crazy," Freddie said gently. "Who cares what people say? You should eat what you want. You love steak, so you ate a giant steak. How's that a crime?"

"Yeah but-"

"Sam, do you think I love you and I married you because you're thin?" Freddie frowned. "I didn't. I married you because you're the most perfect girl I've met. I'd think that if you were one hundred pounds or if you were five hundred pounds. And as for looking good for me…all you need to do is show me those amazing blue eyes and flash me that smile of yours and I you can't _get _anymore beautiful."

Sam gave him a small smile. "You-You really mean that? You don't think I need to watch what I eat or anything?"

"No," Freddie said. "You eat what you want to. If you want to eat a salad one day, eat a salad. If you want to eat fried chicken the next day, eat fried chicken."

Sam chuckled. "I _do _love fried chicken."

"I know you do," Freddie smiled, pulling her closer to him. He tilted her chin up and gave her a kiss as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Hey," he said when they pulled apart. "You know…watching you eat that giant steak tonight…it was kind of a turn on."

"_Really_?" Sam smirked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah," Freddie whispered, beginning to plant gentle kisses down her neck. "You looked _totally _sexy."

"Hmm," Sam laughed, taking Freddie's hands and leading them towards their bed. "Maybe we should do something about that then…"


	475. Chapter 475

_Admission_

"-And then my mom realized this guy has been stealing her special hot sauce packets from El Guapo Taco," Sam said as her, Carly and Freddie sat in the iCarly studio, sharing a large bowl of popcorn. "So she kicked him to the curb."

"Aw, your mom really liked that guy from the dry cleaners," Carly said, popping a few kernels into her mouth.

"Yeah, she was with this guy for what, a week?" Freddie nodded.

"I know, but it's cool, she already found a new guy," Sam said. "And he's actually been to college!"

"Wow, really?" Carly said.

"Well, sort of," Sam said. "He went to clown school for three weeks before dropping out to become one of those guys who polishes shoes at the airport."

"You know, your mom has the _weirdest _tastes in guys," Freddie commented.

Sam narrowed her eyes. "Your mom went out with _Lewbert_. I wouldn't be talking, Fredweiner!"

"I-Okay, good point," Freddie sighed as his phone dinged. "Oh! It's Rebecca!"

"Gibby's cousin?" Carly asked.

"Uh-huh, I've been texting her for the past two weeks," Freddie grinned. "And a couple nights ago we went out for pizza."

"Didn't you already try getting together with Gibby's cousin?" Sam frowned. "You know, that girl who was seven feet tall and crushed Carly's project and made her cry."

"I didn't cry!" Carly defended. "Sure, I was _upset _that the project I worked on for three weeks and spent a combined forty-seven hours on wound up in pieces and I wound up getting a B in that class, ruining my chance once again for straight A's…but I didn't _cry._"

"This is a different cousin," Freddie explained. "She just moved to Seattle from Minnesota and I've been helping her get acquainted with the city."

"Is she another giant?" Sam smirked.  
"_No_," Freddie said. "She happens to be a _normal _height _and _quite attractive."

"How come all of the girls in Gibby's family are cute, but the guys all look like, well…Gibby?" Carly questioned.

"I dunno, genetics?" Freddie shrugged. "Anyway, Rebecca is great. She's funny, she's hot, she's creative, she's hot-"

"You said hot twice," Carly pointed out.

"Well she's doubly hot!" Freddie said.

"So what? Is this poor chick your new little girlfriend?" Sam asked, cringing. "God, what goes on in some girls' heads?"

"Hey, you dated me," Freddie reminded her.

"Yes...and I've been having nightmares since," Sam said.

"Sam…" Carly sighed, rolling her eyes. She turned back to Freddie. "So, _is _this Rebecca your new girlfriend?"

"Well I wouldn't say we were _official _yet," Freddie said.

"Lucky her," Sam mumbled.

"But I'd say things are going pretty good between us," Freddie continued, shooting Sam a glare. He looked down at his phone. "Hey, she's actually outside the building now! I forgot I told her she could come over and hang out for awhile."

"Why don't you bring her up here?" Carly suggested. "I want to meet this girl."

"You do?" Freddie asked.

"Sure, if you think you guys might get serious, we'll meet her eventually anyway," Carly said.

"Okay, I'll go run down and get her," Freddie said.

Carly waited until Freddie had left the room before she turned to her best friend. "Okay, Sam. When Freddie brings this girl up, please be nice to her."  
"What? Who says I won't be nice?" Sam frowned.

Carly gave her a knowing look.

"Fine, I'll be nice," Sam mumbled.  
"Thank you, I'm sure Freddie will appreciate it," Carly said. "Speaking of Freddie though…you okay with this?"

"With what?" Sam asked, confused.

"You know, with him starting to see Gibby's cousin," Carly said.

"I mean it pains me to see some poor girl have to deal with that nub, but I'm not gonna lose sleep over her misery," Sam shrugged.

"No, I meant…come on, isn't it sort of weird to see Freddie with some other girl? You guys dated, after all."

"Carls, that was last year," Sam chuckled. "Freddie and I are both over each other. We're allowed to see other people."  
"Yeah, but still-"

"Carly, it would be weird to see Freddie out with some other girl if I still liked him or something," Sam said. "But I don't. So why should I care if he goes and dates some other girl? It doesn't bother me that-"

"Hey, guys," Freddie said, returning to the room with a girl at his heels. "I'd like you to meet Rebecca, Gibby's cousin."

Carly's eyes widened as she stared at Gibby's cousin. Rebecca was certainly shorter than Sabrina had been. In fact, she was more on the short side. She had curly blonde hair and had bright blue eyes. She was wearing a simple pair of jeans and a button down plaid shirt and had a small scowl on her face. Carly looked over at Sam, and then back at Rebecca.

Was it just her, or was it like she was looking at a set of clones?

"Hey," Rebecca said simply, nodding at Carly and Sam. She turned back to Freddie. "I thought you said we were going to hang out at your place. Or is your crazy mom there?"

"Oh, no, she-she's at work," Freddie said. "But I thought you could meet my friends Carly and Sam first."

"Hi," Carly said, finally getting over the shock of seeing Sam's look-alike standing in front of her. "I-I'm Carly. That's Sam."

"'Sup?" Sam said, not bothering to get up out of her beanbag chair.

"Cool," Rebecca said boredly. "Hey, you got a bathroom around here? I need to take a waz. I just drank a giant slushie before I got here."

"Oh, um, yeah," Carly nodded. "Right out that door and down the hall to your left."

"Got it," Rebecca said as she hurried out of the studio.

"She's really great, isn't she?" Freddie beamed once the door closed behind her.

"Um, sure," Carly said, walking over to Freddie. "But…don't you think she's a bit, well, _familiar_?"

"Familiar?" Freddie frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Come on, I can't be the only person who saw it!" Carly said, looking over at Sam. "Sam, tell him!"

"What? She seems okay," Sam shrugged. "I mean her senses can't all be in tact if she's dating Fredweirdo, but-"

"What? Sam! She's like a total-"

"Wait, wait, wait," Freddie said. "I think I know what you're talking about."

"Good," Carly said, sighing a breath of relief. "I thought you both were going crazy."

"Oh no, I saw it at first too," Freddie said.

"At first?" Carly frowned. "Freddie, I'm pretty sure this chick still looks exactly like-"

"Yeah, at first glance it _does _look like she has Gibby's nose," Freddie said. "And, I'm not gonna lie, that sort of freaked me out at first. But if you look closely you'll see it's not Gibby's nose at all!"

"Yes, it's not_ Gibby's _nose," Carly nodded. "It's-"

"Hey, you have really cool soap in your bathroom," Rebecca said, coming back into the studio. "It's shaped like bacon."

"Whoa! You used my special bacon soap?" Sam exclaimed, jumping to her feet. "I ordered that with Spencer's credit card from that funky soaps website!"

"Well they lathered my hands real nice," Rebecca said, stepping closer to Sam. "So watcha gonna do about it, Blondie?"

"Oh my God…what's happening?" Freddie frowned. "Carly, I-I think I'm scared."

"Oh, you wanna know what I'm going to do?" Sam said, crossing her arms. "I'm going to-"

"Sam, be nice!" Carly hissed warningly. "You promised!"

"But she used my bacon soap!" Sam defended. "Spencer unknowingly spent good money on that stuff!"

"Um, Rebecca, maybe we should go," Freddie said. "Er, bye guys. I'll see you at school tomorrow."

"Later," Rebecca said, giving Sam one last smirk over her shoulder as she followed Freddie out of the studio.  
"I can't believe her!" Sam exclaimed. "She touched my bacon soap! No one touches my bacon soap! I swear, when I get my hands on her-"

"You'll do nothing and be nice!" Carly said firmly. "Sam, you can't hurt her; Freddie really likes her."

"But she-"

"I know, I know, your bacon soap," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "But just try and forget about it. How about we focus on the fact that this Rebecca chick acts and looks exactly like-"

"I can't forget about my bacon soap, Carly!" Sam said. "Now I'm going to have to order more! Ugh, people can be so irritating sometimes!"

"Right…" Carly sighed. "Well, I guess I should go warn Spencer to hide his wallet then. Oh, and we should start working on our history project too. I'll bring up some snacks and then we can get started. What do you want?"

"Surprise me," Sam mumbled.

"Okay, back in a sec," Carly said.

As her best friend left the studio, Sam fell back into her beanbag chair and rested her chin on her knees.

She wasn't stupid; she had seen what Carly had. Freddie's new little girlfriend was exactly like her.

_What happened to him wanting someone more 'normal'_? Sam thought to herself. _I mean, if he's attracted to Rebecca, then-then I guess it wasn't my personality that Freddie couldn't deal with in our relationship…it was just me._

…..

"Okay…what's going on?" Carly said, rolling her eyes as she came downstairs to find her brother angrily hitting a wooden box with a sledgehammer. "I was trying to do some homework, but it's kind of hard to do trig problems with _this _happening below you. Are you working on a sculpture or something?"

"No!" Spencer frowned. "I'm unleashing my rage!"

"Oh. Well could you do that quieter then?"

"Do you want to know _why _I'm unleashing my rage?" Spencer said, dropping his sledgehammer.

"No, not particularly," Carly said.

"Well I'll tell you why!"

"I figured you would…"

"You know that new museum that opened up in Olympia?" Spencer said. "The one for new artists to display their work to the public?"

"Oh yeah, that place seems perfect for you!" Carly nodded. "Did you submit some of your sculptures to be displayed?"

"Yes! And they were all denied admission!" Spencer exclaimed. "All five of them!"

"Aw, Spence, I'm sorry," Carly said, giving her brother a hug.

"Thanks," Spencer sighed. "Anyway, what are you up to today, kiddo?"

"Nothing much, we're just gonna film so iCarly stuff," Carly replied. "Sam and Freddie are on their way now. Or, Freddie is. Sam may or may not still be asleep. But I'm gonna try and go get a few more problems done for my math homework. Can you send them up when they get here?"

"Yeah, no problem," Spencer said. "I'm just gonna go run and grab my good sledgehammer from under my bed."  
"How is it your 'good' sledgehammer?" Carly asked.  
"It hits better!"

"Ah," Carly chuckled. "Well have fun hitting you box."

"I will!"

As Carly disappeared upstairs and Spencer ran into his room, Freddie entered the apartment with none other than Rebecca behind him.

"I can't believe you've never seen an episode of iCarly," Freddie said. "You'll love it, Rebecca!"

"Don't tell me what I'll love," Rebecca said. "Hey, ham!"

She hurried over to the counter where a large ham was sitting.

"Um, I think that's Sam's ham," Freddie frowned. "See, the other day Sam helped Spencer with one of his sculptures, so he said he'd buy her a ham to make up for it and-"

"Eh, she'll get over it," Rebecca shrugged, helping herself to the meat.

"Rebecca, I really don't think that's a good idea," Freddie said. "Sam can be pretty possessive of her ham."

"What? You don't think I could take her in a fight?"

"Well I didn't say-"

"Whoa, this is _such _good ham!" Rebecca said. "I think it's honey glazed."

"I-I-I'm gonna run upstairs," Freddie said, not wanting to be around if Sam came in to find her ham being devoured. "Come on up when you're done eating."

"We'll see," Rebecca said, turning back to her ham.

"Okay, got my sledgehammer!" Spencer said brightly as Freddie went up to the studio. "Now I can really let this box have it!"

He looked over to the counter, where Rebecca's back was facing him as she continued to eat Sam's ham.

"Hey, Sam, Carly said for you to go up to the studio," Spencer said. "Oh, and does your mom have anymore of that special ointment? Because I'm getting this rash that-Holy snot, you're not Sam!"

Rebecca had turned around to face Spencer, her mouth full of ham.

"Who-Who are you?" Spencer frowned.

"Rebecca," Rebecca replied.

"Oh, right…Freddie's girlfriend," Spencer nodded. "Sorry, it's just that you look a lot like-"

"I smell ham!" Sam said suddenly, bursting into the room, her giant fork drawn. "Where is it? Where's my-"

She grew silent as she saw Rebecca standing over the precious meat, halfway through it.

"What are you doing?" Sam demanded, storming over. "That's my ham!"

"Yeah, and it's pretty good," Rebecca replied, licking her fingers.

"You are my ham?" Sam said, her voice dangerously quiet. "You _ate _my ham? YOU ATE MY HAM?"

"Maybe I should take this out of the room," Spencer said, quickly grabbing his sledgehammer and racing off towards his room.

"I didn't see your name on it," Rebecca replied coolly. "Besides, no one stands in the way of my ham."

"Your ham? What the-Who do you-Alright!" Sam snapped, stepping towards the other blonde. "What gives you the right to think you can just barge into other people's houses and eat their hams!"  
"But this isn't your house or your ham," Rebecca pointed out.

"That's it!" Sam yelled, making a grab for the girl.

"Sam! No!" Freddie said, rushing downstairs with Carly.

"Sam, don't hit her!" Carly exclaimed.

"But she ate my ham!"

"She ate your ham?" Carly frowned as Freddie went over to Rebecca.

"But look, there's till half left," Freddie reasoned.

"Not when I get done with it there won't be," Rebecca said. "Hey, there any barbecue sauce around here? I'll check the fridge."

"Sure girl I've known for one day, rummage through the fridge," Carly mumbled under her breath. She grabbed Freddie's armed and pulled him out of the kitchen. "Freddie! Why'd you let your girlfriend eat Sam's ham?"

"I didn't _let _her!" Freddie defended. "I told her to stop! But, well…she's a little stubborn."

"Look, Freddie, I get that you like this girl and everything, but-but-come on!" Carly said, exasperated. "She's loud, she's pushy, she eats other people's hams…don't you see what you're doing? I think you're trying to make up for something you don't have anymore with Rebecca."

"Make up for something? What do you mean?" Freddie frowned.

"I mean look at her!" Carly hissed, spinning him around to stare at Rebecca and Sam, who were glaring at each other over the ham. With the two of them standing so close, it was real easy to see how similar the girls look.

"What about her?" Freddie asked.

"I mean…ugh! Freddie! How can you be so clueless?"

"I think you've gone a little loopy, Carls," Freddie said. He walked back over to Rebecca. "Hey, um, Rebecca? Why don't I take you across the street to the deli to get you your own ham?"

"Cool," Rebecca grinned, stepping away from the half-eaten ham. She turned to Sam. "There, you can have the rest now."

"Sam put that fork down!" Carly said quickly as Sam made to grab her giant fork. She waited until Freddie and Rebecca had left the apartment to let go of her hand. "Okay, Sam, I realize-"

"I hate that chick!" Sam yelled, looking down at the remains of her ham. "I _hate _her! What kind of person just eats other people's food?"

"Yes…what kind of person?" Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Look, I don't like this girl too much either. But please, for Freddie, just try and be civil around her. I know it must be hard for you, especially when she seems so similar to-"

"It's not hard for me! I'll be civil! I don't care about her and Freddie!" Sam exclaimed.

"I never said you-"

"I don't care if Freddie buys her all the ham in the world or if he _marries _her or if they have a bunch of stupid little kids!" Sam continued. "I only care that she ate _my _ham! That's it!"

"Okay, but-"

"I going to take a bath and eat my ham in peace," Sam mumbled, grabbing the plate and heading upstairs.

"Sam, wait, I didn't mean-You eat ham in the bath?" Carly frowned.

"Hey, is it safe to come out now?" Spencer asked, poking his head into the living room as Sam stormed up the stairs.

"Yeah, for now," Carly sighed. "Did you meet Freddie's new girlfriend?"

"You mean Sam's clone?" Spencer said.

"Thank you!" Carly said. "I've tried pointing that out to Freddie but I think he's in denial. And poor Sam…I think this is hitting her harder than she thought it would. And, well, it doesn't help that Freddie _is _dating someone exactly like her who ate her ham."

"You think she'll be okay?" Spencer asked.

"I hope so," Carly said. "I guess it depends on how long this Rebecca girl sticks around. Hopefully Freddie will open his eyes soon."

…..

Sam stood at the counter of the Groovy Smoothie impatiently the next day, waiting for her smoothies.

She was still fuming about the events that had happened the previous day.

_I can't believe Freddie just let that stupid chick eat my ham…and then went to buy her more ham! When __**we**__ were dating it was like pulling teeth getting him to buy me the stuff!_

"Hey, what are you doing here?"

Sam turned around to see Freddie himself standing behind her.

"Oh…it's you," Sam said. "Carly and I are helping Spencer out with a sculpture and we got thirsty, so he gave me money to make a smoothie run. What are _you _doing here?"

But before he could answer, Sam caught sight of Rebecca sitting at a nearby table.

"Oh, I guess you're out on a little _date_."

"Um, yeah," Freddie said. "I had spent all morning making us a nice lunch at my place, but, well, Rebecca wanted a smoothie so…here we are."

"Well she sounds _delightful_," Sam said, her voice dripping in sarcasm just as Rebecca came over.

"Hey, Freddie?" she said. "I'm really thirsty. And hungry. Could you buy me _two _of those love smoothies and a large fries?"

Sam raised an eyebrow. _Wow, so he couldn't even buy me one of those things, and he buys this freak two?_

"Um, well, Rebecca," Freddie said, chuckling nervously. "See, those-those love smoothies are thirty-six bucks. If I get two of those _and _the fries, I'm spending almost eighty dollars."

Rebecca frowned. "What? So you don't think I'm worth it?"

"No!" Freddie said quickly. "I-I do. It's just I only brought enough money for _one _smoothie, and-"

"God, what kind of boyfriend can't even shell out a few extra bucks to buy his girlfriend the smoothies she wants?" Rebecca snapped.

Sam raised an eyebrow. _Wow…this girl is making __**me **__look like a saint. And that's saying something!_

"Rebecca, please, it's not that I-"

"You know, you're a pretty lousy boyfriend if you can't even take care of my smoothie needs!"

"Hey!" Sam said, unable to stop herself as she stepped closer to Rebecca. "You better watch who you call a lousy boyfriend!"

"Um, Sam-" Freddie started.

"Zip it, Fredwad!" Sam snapped. She turned back to Rebecca. "What is your _deal_?"

"My _deal_?" Rebecca scoffed.

"You can't just expect Freddie to drop eighty bucks on you for a _snack_!" Sam exclaimed. "He bought you a ham yesterday after you _devoured _mine!"

"If he's my boyfriend, then he has to buy me what I want," Rebecca said, crossing his arms.

"No he doesn't!" Sam said loudly. "You know, Freddie's a _good _boyfriend! Sure, he might be stingy sometimes, but he's nice and romantic and fun! I bet you don't even care that he probably already bought you flowers or that he always holds doors open for you or that if you even _mention _being cold, he'll give you his jacket in a second!"

"Please, like that's what any girl wants in a boyfriend," Rebecca said, rolling her eyes. "You know, if that's all this loser can offer, maybe I should just break up with him."

"Um, what now?" Freddie said.

"Well you know what? He breaks up with you first!" Sam retorted. "So there!"

"I-I do?" Freddie frowned.

"Well good! I was getting sick of the dorkiness anyway!" Rebecca snapped.

"Oh you don't even _deserve _his dorkiness!" Sam yelled.

"Whatever," Rebecca said, narrowing her eyes. "I'm out of here! I'll find some new guy who would gladly buy me all the gigantic smoothies I want!"

And with that she spun on her heel and stormed out of the Groovy Smoothie.

"Um, did I just break up with her?" Freddie asked, confused.

"Sorry," Sam sighed, calming down a bit now that Rebecca was gone. "I guess…I guess I just blew it for you with her."  
"Hey, actually…I think you did me a favor," Freddie said. "Rebecca was getting to be a little…a little much."

"A _little_?" Sam scoffed. "Dude, why did you even go out with her? She made me look like an angel!"

"I dunno, I guess I thought there was something about her…" Freddie shrugged. "But the more we hung out, the more I realized that thing I thought she had was just in my head."

"What did you think she had?" Sam asked.

Freddie shook his head. "I'm not really sure. There was just something missing. Anyway, you think Spencer could use and extra set of hands working on his sculpture?"

"Um, sure, probably," Sam nodded. "You wanna come help?"

"Yeah," Freddie smiled. "But first…I _did _sort of budget thirty-six dollars out of my savings to buy _one _love smoothie. I mean, what's the harm in getting one?"

"You're gonna drink that entire thing by yourself?" Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"No," Freddie said simply. "You're going to share it with me. I mean, we never _did _get to finish that one we started last year, right? And I'd rather share it with someone who I can actually tolerate instead of that Rebecca chick."

Sam smiled. "Okay. Come on, let's grab some seats."

Freddie and Sam headed to a nearby table.

"So," Freddie said. "You really think I was a good boyfriend?"

"Oh shut it, Freddinger!"


	476. Chapter 476

_Overview_

Freddie happily dried his hair as he stepped out of his shower and headed into his and Sam's shared bedroom.

Him and Sam had only been living together for a little over two weeks, but already Freddie knew this was the perfect arrangement for them. He absolutely loved having his girlfriend around all the time. He loved waking up next to her and seeing her blue eyes right before he went to bed every night. He loved never having to text her to tell her to come over anymore and not having to miss her after she would leave.

As Freddie grabbed a shirt from his closet (which was now much more crammed since Sam's entire wardrobe now hung there as well), he glanced over at the bed and saw that it was empty. Sam must've gotten up while he was in the bathroom.

He quickly threw his clothes on and headed out into the kitchen where his girlfriend was sitting at the table, still in her pajamas, picking at a bowl of cereal.

"Morning, baby!" Freddie said brightly, giving her a quick kiss before he walked over to the counter and switched on the coffee maker.

"God, could you be any louder?" Sam snapped.

Freddie frowned. "Um, sorry?"

"And this stupid cereal is disgusting!" Sam said, shoving the bowl away and getting to her feet. "Why do you buy the grossest chiz they have at the store?"

"I thought you liked that kind," Freddie said, a bit confused by Sam's behavior. "It has those little marshmallows."

"Well they're disgusting!" Sam said, heading to the fridge.

"Oh…um, there's bacon I bought yesterday," Freddie said. "Or I can make you some eggs. Or-"

"I don't want any of that!" Sam moaned.

"You don't want _bacon_?" Freddie said, shocked. "Wow, that's a first."

"What? I'm not allowed to not want bacon for once in my life?"

"No! I just-Well, what _do _you want?" Freddie said quickly.

"I don't know!" Sam exclaimed.

"You don't know?" Freddie repeated. "Okay…I'm going to have toast. Do you want me to make you some too? Or-"

"No! Jeez, Freddie! Not all of the word's problems can be solved by toast!" Sam yelled, slamming fridge door closed and storming out of the kitchen.

"Huh?" Freddie frowned. "Wait, Sam? Where are you going?"

"Back to bed!" Sam said over her shoulder. "Where nobody's going to annoy me with breakfast options!"

"I-_what_?" Freddie said as Sam retreated into the bedroom. "Okay…I'm _so _lost right now."

He followed Sam back into the bedroom and sat down at the foot of the bed. "Sam…you okay?"

"Why wouldn't I be okay?"

"Um…well, you-you seem a little-"

"A little _what_?" Sam demanded, narrowing her eyes.

"A little…upset about something," Freddie said reluctantly. "Is anything wrong?"

"No!"

"Alright," Freddie said quickly. "Just…If you need to talk-"

"Can you _go_?" Sam said. "I wanna get some more sleep. I-I don't feel well, okay?"

"Oh, you're sick?" Freddie said. "Well why didn't you just say so? What hurts? Your head? Your sinuses? You think you have a cold or the flu? Hmm…"

He felt her forehead. "Well you don't have a fever, but you are a little clammy-"

"Oh my God! _Why _are you still here?" Sam groaned.

"Why don't I bring you some orange juice and some cold medicine?" Freddie said. "I have this great stuff that can really get any bug out of you in twenty-four hours and have you right back up on your feet. You need some tissues too? Some more pillows? Extra blankets and-"

"I _need _for my nubby boyfriend to let me have some dang peace and quiet!" Sam snapped.

"I-Alright, alright," Freddie said. "But if you need anything, I'll be right out there in the living room-"

"_Go_!" Sam moaned. "Before I throw something at you!"

Freddie took that as his cue to leave, so he left the room, shutting the door behind her.

_Man…did __**she **__ever wake up on the wrong side of the bed_, Freddie thought to himself.

…

A few hours later, Freddie was sitting on the sofa, working on his laptop, when Sam came out of the bedroom, shuffling her feet as she came over to the couch and collapsing onto the cushions.

"Hey," Freddie smiled, closing his laptop. "You feeling any better?"

Sam didn't reply as she curled up and rested her head on the arm of the couch.

"Um…baby?"

"What?" Sam asked, grabbing the remote and scrolling through the couple's DVR.

"I-I made you some waffles," Freddie said cautiously. "You know, since you didn't eat breakfast."

"Oh, thanks," Sam said simply, though making no effort to get up and go into the kitchen. "Hey, where's that movie I recorded last week? The one with the dancing cat."

"Oh, I thought you watched it already," Freddie replied. "I deleted it."

"What?" Sam exclaimed, sitting up. "But I wanted to watch it again! I loved that movie! Why would you do that?"

"I-I'm sorry," Freddie said. "But I'm sure it will be on again and-"

"But that was my favorite movie!"

"You said it was just okay the first time you saw it, though," Freddie pointed out.

"But it was the best okayish movie I had ever seen!" Sam cried as she got up and headed into the kitchen where her plate of waffles was waiting for her.

"Sam, I'll re-record it for you," Freddie said.

"It won't be the same!" Sam snapped. "I can't believe you, Fredwad! That was the one thing that made me happy and you _destroyed _it!" She angrily picked up a bottle of chocolate syrup and proceeded to dump it onto her waffles.

"I wouldn't say I _destroyed _it," Freddie frowned. "I just-whoa."  
"What?" Sam said coolly as she began to eat her waffles, which were now smothered in chocolate.

"Um, isn't that a lot of chocolate sauce for two waffles?" Freddie said.

As soon as he said it, Freddie knew it was probably the stupidest thing he had ever said.

"What? First you delete my movie, now you won't let me eat my _waffles_?" Sam frowned.

"Sorry, I was just making an observation-"

"Well how _nice_!" Sam said hotly. "I'm so glad you can make your observations about my waffles!"

"Baby, what's going on?" Freddie asked. "I mean all day so far you've been cranky and irritable and-"

"I am _not _cranky!" Sam yelled. "Or irritable!"  
And with that she took her waffles and stomped off to the bedroom, slamming the door behind her.

…..

Later that afternoon, Freddie stood in front of the closed bedroom door, armed with a smoothie in his hand as he took a deep breath and opened up.

"Sam?" he said softly.

"What?" Sam mumbled, slowly stirring in the bed.

"You're still asleep?" Freddie asked, concerned.

"No, I'm just laying around," Sam groaned.

"You sure you're not sick then?"

"Yes."

Freddie spotted a half-eaten chocolate bar laying on his pillow. "Um, Sam? I thought we agreed on a no-eating-in-bed rule. You know, after you left that sandwich in here and it attracted a bunch of ants and I got bit all over my-"

"Dude…"

"Okay, okay, I'm stopping," Freddie said quickly. "But, um, I brought you a smoothie. I thought it might cheer you up…not that you haven't been perfectly cheerful though! You have! You've been great! Peachy even!"

"Aw, you brought me a smoothie?" Sam smiled, and Freddie breathed a sigh of relief as he found that Sam didn't seem to be on a rampage at this moment.

"Yeah, Kiwi-Splat; your favorite," Freddie said.

"Thanks," Sam said, sitting up. As she did, though, she let out a small wince of pain.

Freddie frowned. "Um, Sam?" he said as she took the beverage. "Not-Not to upset you or anything, but are you absolutely positive you're okay? I mean you look a little pale, you've been in bed all day, the only real food you've eaten is chocolate, and it kind of seems like you're in pain."  
Sam shook her head. "I'm not sick."

"Well…okay, I'm sorry, but I think we should maybe call a doctor," Freddie said.

Sam raised an eyebrow. "I _said _I'm fine…why can't you just _drop _it?"

"Because you're being all-and you look-and you seem-"

"Oh, I get it!" Sam said, flaring up again, and Freddie instantly cursed his stupidity. "So because for _one _day I'm not running around doing stuff with you and because I'm wearing old pajamas all day and because I'm not amused with your nubby chiz today I must be sick and I need to be looked at by some doctor?"

"Um, well, I-"

"Maybe you're the one who needs to see a doctor!" Sam yelled. "Because maybe he could figure out why you're such a-a-nub!"

Okay, well…" Freddie said, scrambling to his feet and feeling very scared. "Um, I-I can see you need some 'alone time'. Why don't I just run out and give you some privacy?"

"Oh _finally _you do something that doesn't make me want to kill you!" Sam said, laying back down.

….

Freddie sat at the Groovy Smoothie, sipping his second smoothie of the day as he boredly played on his phone.

_What is Sam's __**deal **__today? _he thought to himself. _I know she's never exactly been a basket of puppies, but this is a whole new level!_

"Hey, Freddie!"

Freddie looked up and saw Carly walking over to his table.

"Oh hey Carls, what are you doing here?" Freddie said, glad to have some company.

"Just thought I'd grab a snack before I head over to Spencer's to help him make our Granddad's birthday sculpture," Carly explained. "What about you? Don't you and Sam usually hang out on Saturdays? Especially now that you live together."

"Sam, well she…she's gone crazy, Carly!" Freddie said.

"What? What do you mean?" Carly asked.

"I mean ever since she woke up this morning she's been a nut!" Freddie exclaimed. "She's yelling at me for every little thing; she's lying in bed moaning but she won't let me call a doctor, and she must've eaten every crumb of chocolate in the apartment! I don't know what's going on! I think she might actually bite off my thumb or something tonight! I'm telling you, she's-Okay…why are you laughing?"

"Because!" Carly chuckled. "You're such an oblivious boy."

"Um…huh?"

"Freddie, Sam hasn't gone crazy," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Well then why has she been acting like she is?" Freddie demanded.

"Okay," Carly sighed. "You remember that health class we took back in the ninth grade?"  
"What? Yeah, but what's that got to do with anything?" Freddie frowned.

"Well, you remember that, er, _disturbing _slideshow they showed us that gave a very thorough overview of, um, _the female anatomy_?"

"I'm still not following, Carly," Freddie said.

"Ugh! _How _were you our valedictorian?" Carly said, exasperated. "Look, remember how you learned that there's this _thing _that all girls go through about once every thirty days? You know, that _thing _that made Gibby pass out when they began talking about it?"

"What thing?" Freddie asked, still confused. "I don't remember learning about any-Oh… You-You mean _that _thing?"

"There you go," Carly nodded. "See, sometimes when girls go through that, they get a little…hormonal and irritable. Plus you get cramps and you don't fit into your clothes and all you want is junk food."

"Ah," Freddie said weakly, feeling his face turning red. He felt just as awkward right now as he did when he was fourteen and sitting in that health class. "Well…what can I do for her? Is there like, I dunno, medicine?"

"No," Carly told him. "There's nothing you can do, really, other than be a supportive boyfriend."

"Oh," Freddie said. "Well…I guess this is just something I'll have to get used to then if I want to keep living with Sam, right? Even though she might kill me."

"Nah, she won't kill you," Carly assured him. "The worst is over after the first day."

"Oh thank God," Freddie said, breathing a sigh of relief.

…..

That evening Sam sat on her and Freddie's couch curled up as she watched reruns of old television shows. She was just about to change the channel when the front door opened up and Freddie walked in carrying a large bag.

"Hey," he said gently. "Glad to see you're up."

"Hey," Sam said softly. "Um, listen…about earlier, I'm sorry I-"

"Don't apologize," Freddie said, sitting down next to her and wrapping his arms around her as he kissed her temple. "Listen…I know you're kind of going through…_things_."

"Things?" Sam repeated.

"Yeah, um, Carly-Carly talked to me," Freddie nodded. "She explained why you were acting so-She explained why you were acting a tiny bit off today."

"Oh my God," Sam groaned. "She did? I'm going to kill her!"

"Sam, it's okay, it's nothing to be upset about," Freddie said. "It's a natural-"

"For the love of ham _please _stop talking," Sam said, burying her face in her arms.

"Er, right," Freddie nodded. "Anyway, I-I picked you up some things that I thought would maybe make you feel better."

Sam looked up. "What kind of things?"

"Well, um, I got you a _lot _of chocolate," Freddie said, pulling out several bags of chocolate. "The good kind that you love. And I got you these pills, they're supposed to help with cramps…and the lady at the store said to get you this foot massager thing. Oh, and here's some cream for your back, and some nausea medicine and some-"

"You-You got me all this?" Sam asked softly.

"Of course," Freddie nodded. "I want you to feel better."

Sam looked up at him. "Well I do…_now_." She leaned up and kissed him gently. "Thank you, baby."


	477. Chapter 477

**AN-This is a chapter to 463, where Sam told Freddie she wasn't going to waste her time caring about him if he was just going to keep saying that she didn't.**

…

_Damage_

For as long as Freddie could remember, it had always seemed as if Sam Puckett was immune to feelings. Sure, she laughed and got angry and all that, but he had never known her to be one who fall victim to anything like sadness or betrayal or heartbreak. After all, those were feelings for the rest of the population like him. Someone like Sam couldn't possibly be hurt, and certainly not by something as simple as _words._

But she had been; by _his _words.

It had been almost an hour since Sam left the studio, and Freddie still hadn't moved as her words echoed in his head.

He couldn't believe that _he_, the weak, nerdy, Freddie Benson, had had such an impact on the strong, tough Samantha Puckett.

Had him simply saying those words 'you don't care about me' really broke through her walls?

_I-I didn't mean it though_ he thought to himself. _I mean…just because I said she doesn't care about me doesn't mean I actually __**meant **__it!_

"_How am I supposed to know what you mean and what you don't mean?"_ Sam's voice replayed in his head.

Freddie sighed as he sat down in one of the beanbag chairs. The more he heard it, the more it slowly began to sink in. He remembered that night in the elevator, as he watched Sam slowly step out after they had decided to end their relationship. He remembered how scared and nervous he felt as he searched for those words to tell Sam how much she had meant to him and _still _meant to him, and how for those few seconds after he had said 'I love you' he was terrified that she would laugh at him.

But she hadn't; she had said it back.

Freddie had meant what he said that night, and it had taken all his courage to say it. It would've killed him to then hear Sam, months later, scoff at his words as if they had meant nothing to him. Yet that's what he had done to Sam. Sam, who had actually let him in for once, had had her feelings (that she did in fact have) thrust back at her as if they were worthless.

_Oh God…what have I done_? Freddie asked himself heavily.

And as he sat up there in the studio, Freddie realized it wasn't even just his saying she didn't care that have been breaking Sam down. Just a few short months ago he did nothing but insult her when she got a job at the Pear Store. Last week he made fun of her because she failed her Chemistry test. And the other day told her that her idea for an iCarly bit she had come up with was 'the stupidest thing he had ever heard'.

It was no wonder Sam had thought Freddie thought that he thought she didn't care and that he probably didn't care either; he had been wrecking everything that had been building up their relationship for years! He had managed to tare down not only what they had made from that month of dating, but from their years of friendship as well.

Freddie angrily punched the beanbag chair he was sitting in. How could he have screwed everything up this badly? And more importantly, how was he going to fix the damage?

…..

Sam sat alone in her house, the remote in her hand thought the television was off.

She couldn't believe she had actually walked away from Freddie like that; it had been the hardest thing she had ever done.

But it was for the best; she couldn't waste her energy caring about someone who didn't even think after she had actually told him she _loved _him that she didn't give two thoughts about him. After all, it was her caring for him that had caused her to feel this lousy in the first place.

_Maybe I should take after mom and date a new guy every week_, Sam thought miserably. _And never get close enough to them to feel this…icky. You know what? Me not caring about Fredwad for real is the best decision I've ever made! I don't need that nerd in my life. Now I can focus on __**important **__things; like distance spitting and Fat Cakes._

But even as Sam thought it, she knew this was going to be easier said than done. For even now, just an hour after she had announced her vow to truly not care, she still couldn't Freddie out of her head.

Just then she heard a knock at her door, which was strange, because it was getting late. Figuring it was her mom's latest man, Sam shuffled to the front door, prepared to see how disgusting this new guy would be, although the one she dated earlier that month with the eye patch, green hair and an odor that reminded her of a junkyard would be hard to beat.

She was shocked, though, to instead Freddie himself standing on her front porch.

"Um, hi," he said.

Sam frowned. "What are you doing here?"

"Sam, can we talk?" Freddie sighed.

"Why?" Sam shrugged. "I told you, I'm not going to waste my time caring about you anymore if you're not-"

"Well I still care about you!" Freddie cut her off, catching her off guard. "Look, Sam, I-I think it's fair to say that lately I've been, well I guess you could say…maybe I've been not-not the nicest-"

"You've been a real jerk," Sam said bluntly.

"Yes, um, jerk could work," Freddie nodded. "And I'm sorry for that. But Sam-"

"Why have you been like that?" Sam couldn't help but ask.

"I don't know," Freddie said honestly. " I guess…I guess I just didn't know how to act around you after we broke up. I mean were we supposed to be super nice to each other or did we act like we hated each other or did we go for that in between thing we've always had…I didn't know. And I still don't know."

"What do you mean?" Sam asked, her tone softening.

"Sam, listen, I don't know what will happen between us down the road," Freddie said. "Maybe we'll get back together again someday…or maybe we won't. But-But no matter what happens, I just want you to know that I _do _care about you. And I _do _love you. Whether I love you as my friend or my girlfriend or something more, I will _always _love you."

Sam simply stared at him.

"I shouldn't have said you don't care about me, and I'm sorry," Freddie said. "It was stupid of me. I-I know you care about me. Or, well, at least I hope you still do, even after everything I've done. You've done so much for me; you made Ms. Briggs's car alarm go off that day when I left my notebook in my locker so I wouldn't get in trouble for not having my homework, you 'persuaded' Mark Harris to let me be AV president instead of his unqualified brother, you-you've always been able to make me laugh, you keep me on my toes…I should've never taken all that for granted."

Sam took a deep breath. "Freddie…as hard as I could try, I don't think I could ever _not _care about you. But, um, don't go spreading that around. You know, I have that whole 'image' thing to protect."

"Oh, yeah," Freddie nodded. "Well, um…sorry. For everything."

"You've said sorry like, three times," Sam pointed out.

"Well I think I still have a few more 'sorrys' left to make up for how I've been," Freddie replied.

Sam gave him a small smile. "Hey…don't forget, I've done a few things too over the years."

"Yeah, well, you still didn't deserve how I've been treating you," Freddie told her. "And so for that I really am sorry."

Sam took a deep breath. "It's okay."

Freddie breathed a sigh of relief. "So we're good?"

"Yeah, if you start straightening up," Sam smirked.

"Deal," Freddie nodded.

The two stared at each other for a moment before Freddie held out his arms and Sam stepped forward into his hug.

"So," Sam said when they pulled apart. "How about we do something fun?"

"Fun?" Freddie repeated, raising an eyebrow. "What are you thinking, Puckett?"

"Wanna go to El Guapo Taco and try and amp up Meat Golf a little?" Sam grinned.

"Sam, you know Carly's been telling us how childish and immature that game is, and how we should stop acting like animals by putting around food in the parking lots of Mexican chain restaurants," Freddie said as he picked up the two bent golf clubs by the front door. "So let's go."


	478. Chapter 478

_Onion_

"-And boom! That's five games of Chinese checkers in a row I win!" Sam triumphantly to her husband as the couple sat at their kitchen table. "So you count that with the three games of Go Fish, one game of Monopoly and twelve games of tic-tac-toe, I am _officially _the gaming champion!"

"Yeah, yeah," Freddie mumbled as he began putting the board away. "Man, I wish the cable was back."

"Seriously," Sam sighed.

"So where are the kids? Shouldn't they be home from school by now?" Freddie asked, setting the game down on the counter.

"Nah, Tyler's carpool is taking him to his baseball practice and the girls are working on a project with a classmate. Actually though, one of us needs to go pick them up soon. Ashton texted me the address of the girl earlier."

"Oh okay, I'll go get them," Freddie said. "And on my way back I can even swing by the park and get Tyler."

"You just want an excuse to get out of the house so I can stop creaming you in all these games," Sam smirked.

"Well you cheated in those tic-tac-toe rounds!" Freddie defended.

"You can't cheat in tic-tac-toe," Sam said rolling her eyes.

"Well you did!" Freddie snapped just as his phone began to ring. He pulled it out of his pocket and looked down at the screen. "Oh, perfect timing, that's Emma probably telling me to come get her and Ashton."

He quickly answered. "Hi Em, I'm leaving the house now to come get you and your sister."

"Alright, well is mom coming?" Emma asked.

"Um, no, she's staying here to try and think up more ways to defile the classic game of tic-tac-toe," Freddie said. "Why?"

"Well this girl whose house we're at says her mom wants to meet both of Ashton and mine's parents," Emma explained.

"Um, really?"

"Yeah, she said her mom is really strict and will only let her hang out with people if she's met _both _their parents," Emma said. "And we need to work on this project tomorrow too, so we kind of need to see this chick again."

"Um, well, okay, I'll tell your mom," Freddie said. "I just think it's a little strange that-"

"Please, _strange _doesn't even begin to describe this girl," Emma scoffed. "She's a total loser and weirdo!"

"Please tell me you're saying this stuff out of earshot," Freddie sighed.

"I mean I can only imagine how much of a psycho her mom must be," Emma continued.

"Emma, be nice, you can't just insult people in their own homes!" Freddie said. "Your mom and I will be there soon."

"Alright, bye," Emma said, hanging up.

"Okay, Sam, you get to come with me to pick up the twins," Freddie said.

"Why?" Sam asked.

"I dunno, their classmate's mom wants to meet both of us," Freddie shrugged.

"Pfft, that's stupid," Sam said.

"Come on, I'm sure she's just trying to be a concerned parent," Freddie reasoned. "We like to meet the parents of the kids our children hang out with."

"Yeah, but we don't summon them both down like this," Sam pointed out.

"Just come on, " Freddie said.

….

"Alright, that's the house on the left I think," Sam said as her and Freddie drove down a street several blocks from their home.

"Got it," Freddie nodded, pulling into the driveway.

The two walked up to the front door and knocked.

"Hey…is that a chicken?" Sam frowned, looking at the corner of the front porch where a small hen was sitting on an old rocking chair.

"Well, I guess they have a pet then," Freddie said.

"That's not a pet, that's dinner," Sam mumbled.

A few moments later the front door opened and a lanky, awkward looking girl appeared in front of them.

"Um, hello," Freddie said politely. "We're Emma and Ashton's parents. They told us your mother wanted to meet us and-"

"Oh I know who you are!" the girl said excitedly. "Come in, come in, it's so nice of you to come."

"Well, er, thank you," Freddie said as him and Sam stepped into the house and spotting their daughters on the couch, both looking less-than-thrilled to be there at the moment.

"I'll go fetch mother," the girl said. "She'll be _so _delighted you're here."

"Er, great," Freddie said. "We're-we're real glad to meet her too…"

Once the girl had run out of the room, Sam turned to the twins. "Okay, _what _planet is that girl from?"

"Right?" Emma nodded.  
"Sam!" Freddie hissed.

"Dad, even I have to agree with them on this one," Ashton whispered. "Noreen is so weird! I mean at first I was sort of glad Ms. Kilwin paired me and Emma up with her because she was the new girl and I wanted to try and make her feel welcome, but ever since we got here she's been freaking me out! Her family has a pet hen that she treats like royalty, she keeps talking about clowns and she listens to those rectangular CD things."

"You mean _cassettes_?" Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Yeah, those," Ashton nodded.

"See? _Psycho_," Sam said.

"Okay, am I the only one here decent enough to _celebrate _people's differences instead of writing them off as _weird _or _psycho_?" Freddie frowned. "Girls, you need to learn that the world is made up of all sorts of people. You can't-"

"Here they are, mother," Noreen said, returning to the room. "All gathered as you requested."

"Wonderful!" they heard a voice say from the hall outside the living room. "Just wonderful. Now, with two-thirds of the original iCarlies here, I can finally get revenge!"

"iCarlies?" Freddie frowned.

"Revenge?" Sam said slowly. "What is going-No!"

Her and Freddie's widened in shock as Noreen's mother walked into the room, and they were faced with none other than Nora Dershlit.

"Hello iCarlies!" Nora said, beaming. "Long time no see, huh? Oh…giggle."

"What-What are you-Aren't you in _prison_?" Freddie exclaimed.

"Oh I was, Freddie, I was!" Nora grinned. "For five long, tiresome years!"

"Wait, is the girl who you told us trapped you guys and Aunt Carly in her basement when you were kids?" Ashton frowned.

"And then trapped you guys again a year later and tied Uncle Spencer to a wheel?" Emma asked.

"Yes!" Sam said, glaring at Nora. "Alright, Nora, I don't know what kind of sick, twisted stunt you're trying to pull, but we're out of here!"

"Yeah, let's go girls," Freddie said to the twins as they headed to the door. "You know, Nora, I have half a mind to call the police on you! It was one thing for you to try and play your little games back when we were younger, but now you're trying to bring our _kids _into it? That's just-Um, why's the door locked?"

He jiggled the doorknob again.

"Unlock it!" Sam hissed.

"Oh, you can't unlock that door, silly Sam," Nora chuckled. "It's locked with industrial locks that can't be picked, broken or destroyed in anyway. The only way out is with a key that I've hidden so well that it will never be found."

"Let's try the windows!" Sam said, running over to the window next to the door.

"Sam, it's no use," Freddie sighed. "It's probably made of-"

"Maxi-glass!" Nora said proudly as Sam tried unsuccessfully to break through the glass with a nearby chair.

"Mom? Dad? What's going on?" Ashton asked slowly.  
"Why did they lock us in?" Emma questioned.

"Because!" Nora said. "All I've ever wanted was to have _friends_! But because I was forced unfairly into prison, I was never given the opportunity to have any!"

"No, I think the reason you don't have any friends is because you're a psycho who locks people in her house!" Sam yelled.

"Silence!" Nora snapped. Then she returned to her happy demeanor. "Anyway, when I got out of prison, I made a vow that if I were to ever get married and have kids, I would make sure _they _had friends!"

"Nora, please, this is completely ridiculous!" Freddie reasoned. "You need to let us go right now and-wait…Are-Are you saying you're _married_?"

"Gross, what would marry _her_?" Sam cringed.

"Oh no, don't worry Freddie, I'm still _very _available," Nora said, flipping her hair in an attempt to look flirty. "For some reason, none of my several attempts at online dating worked out. No one ever clicked on my profile…"

"Gee, I wonder why," Sam scoffed.

"So I then decided to be a strong, independent, twenty-first century woman and adopt my own kid!" Nora said happily, putting her arm around Noreen.

"Er, well that's a very, um, inspirational story," Freddie said. "But I'm serious Nora, you better let me, Sam and our daughters go right now or-"

"Oh no," Nora said. "I'm afraid you all won't be leaving for quite some time. You see, despite all my efforts, poor Noreen also seems to have trouble making friends."

"It's true," Noreen nodded. "In my sixteen years, I've never had one person to call a 'pal' or 'buddy'. No one to have sleepovers with or gossip about boys or tell my deepest, darkest secrets to."

"Aw," Ashton said. "That's so sad."

"What? That's not sad!" Emma snapped. "Can't you tell Noreen and her mom are total lunatics!"

"Yeah, but they're friendless lunatics," Ashton shrugged.

"Oh jeez," Sam mumbled, rolling her eyes.

"But now I've finally solved the problem!" Nora said. "For both of us! By brining you here, my precious Noreen will finally have not one, but _two _friends, and I'll have my own friends as well! Oh, this is so great I think I might puke! Wait…I _know _I can control my vomit if I just-"

"Alright, Nora," Sam said, stepping closer to the woman as she swallowed a gag. "_This _is how it's going to work. You unlock the door and let Fredwad, the twins, and me go, or I'm going to beat you up so bad that you won't be able to tell whether you conscious or unconscious."

"Yeah! Get her mom!" Emma cheered.

"_Must _you act so excited about violence?" Freddie sighed.

"Duh, it's fun," Emma nodded.

"Sam, Sam, Sam," Nora said, shaking her head. "You're not going to hurt me."

"Wanna bet?" Sam said, raising her fist.

"Well if you hurt me, then I guess that means you don't care what happens to Carly!" Nora said quickly, and Sam lowered her fist at once.

"Carly?" Sam repeated.

"What did you do with Carly?" Freddie frowned.

"Oh, nothing," Nora smiled. "I just snuck into her house last night and planted a little device that would emit a special gas I developed in prison that would render her confused and delirious for up to two weeks at the press of a button connected to my cellphone!"

Sam crossed her arms. "You're bluffing."

"Am I? Are you willing to take that risk?"

"Sam…you know what Nora's capable of," Freddie said. "We can't chance that she's _not _bluffing. She could really hurt Carly! And Clarissa and Andy!"

"Well then how are we going to get out of here?" Sam asked. "What about Tyler? He's just sitting at baseball practice now all scared and alone because we're not going to be able to pick him up!"

"We'll think of something," Freddie assured her, putting a comforting arm around her. "We'll get out of this."

"No you won't!" Nora said. "Now then, time for us _friends _to all some fun!"

"Emma, Ashton! Come up to my room and see my neat doll collection!" Noreen said.

"We don't want to see your dolls," Emma said. "What teenager still plays with _dolls_?"

"Um, girls? Might I remind you what's going to happen if you _don't _behave?" Nora said.

"Hey, er, why doesn't Noreen bring her dolls down here and the girls can stay with us while we all hang out in this room?" Freddie suggested.

"Oh, I see what you're saying!" Nora said. "We should all be friends _together_! See, at least someone's on board! Noreen, you go bring the dolls. I'll go into the kitchen and cook up some tasty treats for us all. Oh, and in case you have any ideas, if you'll check your pockets, you'll all see that your cellphones were taken from you when I came down."

Sam, Freddie, Emma and Ashton all immediately felt their pockets, only to find them empty.

"How did she take our phones?" Ashton gasped.

"Oh it's just a little skill I picked up," Nora said. "In _prison_! Alright, you guys wait here while I go get the food. Like you have any choice…"

"Well, believe it or not, when I woke up this morning, I wasn't planning on being kidnapped!" Emma snapped.

"Look, we-we'll get out of this," Freddie said.

"How?" Sam demanded.

"Um…I don't know," Freddie admitted. "But we'll figure out something. I mean _someone _will notice something's up. Look, once Tyler realizes that we're not picking him up from baseball practice, hopefully he'll have enough sense to call Carly or someone! And then maybe they'll be able to piece together what happened to us!"

"So our fate is going to be determined by Tyler using common sense?" Ashton frowned. "That kid can't remember to take off his shoes before getting into the shower half the time!"

"She has a point," Sam nodded.

"Ugh! Why did you guys have to have such weird things happen to you when you were kids? Couldn't you just have been normal teenagers?" Emma moaned. "Now we're getting dragged into everything!"

"We'll get out of this!" Freddie said. "We just need to-"

"Alright, I've got our food!" Nora announced, returning to the room with a large tray. "We have dried cod topped with raw onions and pickled pig hooves!"

"Pickled pig hooves?" Sam repeated. "Wow, Nora…you've actually managed to find the one part of the pig I _won't _eat."

"I have the dolls!" Noreen said, coming back down with three dolls in her arms. She handed a blonde doll to each of the twins.

"Holy chiz! These things look just like us!" Ashton exclaimed, looking at the dolls which were in fact very close replicas of her and her sister.

"Okay, this is a whole new level of creepy now," Emma said. "Why do you have dolls that look just like us?"

"Because," Noreen grinned, holding up her own doll, which looked almost exactly like her. "I've been waiting for this for a long, long time. Now come on, _friends_. Let's go and have a nice tea party."

….

"Now this is a picture of me standing next to a cardboard cutout of Kelly Clarkson," Nora said as she flipped through a massive photo album. "Oh! And this is a picture of me standing next to a guy who looked like Ricky Martin…and here's-"

"We've been looking at your stupid pictures for three hours now!" Sam snapped. "Can you cool it?"

"Well!" Nora huffed, pulling out her cellphone. "It looks like _someone _forgot what would happen if _someone _didn't behave? Would you like to have a confused Carly on your hands for the next two week?"

"Fine, fine, we'll keep looking at the photo album," Freddie said quickly.

"Aw, see, why can't you be sweet like Freddie?" Nora said, rubbing Freddie's back, making Freddie squirm uncomfortably. "You know, Freddie, if you ever get tired of the rudeness…we can always become _more _than friends. You get what I'm saying? Huh? Huh? Oh, of course you do! Oh, it looks like we're running low on oyster juice! Noreen, come help me fetch some more."

"Coming, mother," Noreen said, setting down her doll and following her mother back into the kitchen.

As soon as the two left, the twins got up off the floor, throwing their dolls down as they stepped over to their parents.

"We hate this!" Emma snapped.

"Oh, and you dad and I are having the time of our lives here!" Sam said.

"She can't really keep us here forever, can she?" Ashton asked.

"No, I keep telling you," Freddie said. "We'll figure out a way to-I got it!"

"What do you got?" Sam asked.

"Well, see, I don't know if you've noticed, but Nora seems to kind of still have a thing for me."  
Sam rolled her eyes. "No, really?"

"Anyone could see, that, dad," Ashton said.

"Oh," Freddie said. "Well, anyway, why don't I distract Nora by maybe flirting with her a little, and the girls could keep Noreen distracted. Sam, that would leave you free to grab Nora's cellphone that would release that gas in Carly's house and she'd have no leverage over us anymore! And then you can, well, not that I'd ever encourage you to use violence, but in this case-"

"You want me to beat her up?" Sam grinned.

"Er, yeah, that would be great," Freddie nodded. "What do you guys think?"

"Let's do this!" Emma nodded. "I am _not _going to sit around here and play dolls forever."

"Yeah, we need to get out of here," Ashton nodded.

"Good," Freddie said. He turned to Sam. "Now, you won't be jealous or anything while I flirt with Nora?"

"Oh I'll try and hold myself together," Sam smirked. "Quick! She's coming!"

"Fresh oyster juice for all us _friends_!" Nora smiled, coming back into the room with a pitcher of gray liquid.

"Wow, mother, this is just as delightful as you said it would be," Noreen said. "Friends really do make everything better."

"Hey, um, Noreen?" Emma said. "Why-Why don't we change our dolls into those, er, nice dresses you have?"

"Yeah, it would be so fun to pretend these, um, dolls were going out to a party or the mall or something," Ashton nodded.  
"Why yes, that _does _sound like a hoot!" Noreen said. "You see! Everybody loves dolls if they give it a chance!"

"Aw, look at them, all cozy like pals," Nora said to Sam and Freddie.

"Yeah, real cozy," Freddie said. "Hey, Nora? I love that shirt on you. The color really brings out, um…your eyes."

"Really?" Nora said. "Thank you, Freddie, what a nice thing to say. I love your shirt too. It really shows those biceps."

"Oh, well, thanks," Freddie said, somewhat lamely. "Hey, um, if-if you want, you can, you know, _touch _my biceps."

Nora gasped. "I can?" Then she lowered her voice. "But what about Sam? Won't she get upset?"

"Oh who cares what _she _thinks," Freddie said. "She doesn't appreciate me or my biceps anyway. Not like you do, Nora."

_I'm about to puke_, Sam thought as she slowly inched towards Nora. _Being married all these years has made the nub lose the little bit of flirting skill he had!_

But just as Sam was about to grab Nora's cellphone that was sticking out of her back pocket, Nora suddenly spun around. "Ah-ha!"

"Nora! Wait! Feel the bicep!" Freddie cried.

"Well…isn't this a twist in events!" Nora said, scandalized. "My _friends _are trying to trick me?"

"I worked out yesterday! They're all firm!" Freddie tried again.

"Nora! Get it through your head!" Sam snapped. "We're not your friends! And our kids aren't friends with your whacko daughter either! This is the third time you've done this! When are you going to just accept that you're never going to-"

She was cut off, though, by the front door suddenly slamming down and none other than Quincy Gibson walking in.

"What the-" Nora exclaimed.

"Quincy?" Freddie frowned.

"Whoa! Quincy! How did you do that?" Emma gasped, rushing over to her boyfriend. "You're not strong!"

"Oh, um, that wasn't me," Quincy admitted. He looked over his shoulder as Gibby walked in over the rubble.

"Gibby!" he yelled menacingly.  
"Gib!" Freddie said. "You-How did you-Why are you-"

"Dude! Don't sit around asking questions, we're free!" Sam pointed out. "Let's get out of here and-"

"Nobody moves!" Nora yelled, holding up her cellphone. "Or Carly and her little family get the gas in their house!"

"What gas?" Gibby asked, confused. "Hey, who's the geeky girl in the glasses?"

"Oh, that's Nora's daughter, Noreen" Freddie said.

"Nora had a kid?" Gibby frowned, looking repulsed. "With, like, another person?"

"No, she adopted Noreen," Freddie replied.  
"Oh, right," Gibby nodded.  
"Now then!" Nora snapped. "Everybody is going to stay right where they are or Carly's house will be filled with-"

"Um, you guys all realize that Aunty Carly and all of them aren't home…right?" Quincy frowned.

Everybody turned to look at the boy.

"What are you talking about, Quince?" Freddie frowned.

"Yeah, why wouldn't she be home?" Ashton asked.

"Because they left for their vacation this morning," Quincy said as if it was obvious. "Remember? Clarissa wasn't even at school today."

"Oh…yeah," Emma nodded.

"What?" Sam exclaimed. "You girls knew this and you didn't say anything? We could've been out of here hours ago!"

"But aren't you the one who was supposed to water all of Carly's plants this afternoon?" Quincy said.

Sam blinked. "Oh…yeah."

"Wait, wait, wait," Freddie said, shaking his head. "You're telling me we've been stuck in this house for three hours because we didn't want to hurt Carly and her family…when they left for vacation this morning! _None_ of us remembered that important little detail?"

"Well Carly says a lot of things; I can't keep track of it all!" Sam defended.

"Yeah, and Clarissa always gets to go on cool field trips with student government, I figured that's where she was today," Emma shrugged.

"Wait…so if Aunt Cary and everybody aren't in any danger…why are we still here?" Ashton asked.  
Sam, Freddie, and Gibby exchanged look.

"Well," Freddie said, stepping towards the broken door. "Bye Nora!"

"See ya, Psycho!" Sam said as everybody headed out of the house.

"Later, freaks!" Emma said, taking Quincy's hand.

"But-But Wait!" Nora yelled. "Come back! We didn't even get to knit friendship scarves!"

"But what about my friends? Mother promised me friends!" Noreen said.

"Oh don't worry," Sam smirked. "Juvie's a great place to make friends. Prison…not so much. Tough break, Nora."

"Hey, is that oyster juice?" Gibby asked, looking over at the pitcher on the coffee table. He ran over and grabbed it, taking a long sip. "Ah! Yup, hits the spot."

….

"Wait, so tell me again how you guys figured out what happened?" Sam said later that evening as Gibby, Quincy, Tyler, Emma, Ashton, Freddie and her sat around the Benson's kitchen table, eating a pizza.

"Well I went to go pick up Huey from baseball practice," Quincy said. "And Tyler was still there and he said you guys hadn't shown up yet. So I waited with him, but after twenty minutes you guys still hadn't come. So I drove Tyler back here, but you guys weren't here either. I called Emma and Ashton but they didn't pick up. So I went over to my house and asked my dad if _he _knew where you guys were, and he said no. And then I remembered Emma telling me her and Ashton were working with that new girl, Noreen, at her house on our history project. So I looked up Noreen's address on our computer and when I did, a picture of her mom popped up, and my dad said that it was the crazy girl who kidnapped you guys when you were kids. So we drove over, my dad broke down the door and, well, you know the rest."

"Whoa…that was _smart_," Sam said, amazed. "I can't believe you're Gibby's kid."

"Yeah, well," Quincy grinned, taking the pitcher of oyster juice from his father and taking a large gulp. "What can I say?"

"Gross!" Emma cringed. "There's no way I'm kissing you with oyster juice breath."  
"Drink as much of that stuff as you like, Quincy," Freddie said. He turned back to Sam. "I just hope that this time, Nora stays locked up for good. And her crazy daughter. "

"The police said she'd be going away for a long time," Sam shrugged. "_And _my cousin Kelly was just put in the same prison Nora is going to last month. I might drop her a phone call and have her teach Nora a little lesson about kidnapping people…"

"What sort of lesson?" Gibby asked, confused.

"A painful one," Freddie chuckled.

"You mean like math or something?" Gibby frowned.

"Jeez," Freddie sighed. "Thank God Quincy has a normal brain."

"Somewhat normal," Emma mumbled, still watching Quincy happily chugging the oyster juice.


	479. Chapter 479

_Box_

"-And then I realized if I double knot the laces, my shoes don't come off and everything's just fine!" Gibby said as him and Freddie walked through the halls of Ridgeway after school one day. "Neat, huh?"

"Oh yeah…real neat," Freddie nodded, rolling his eyes.

"Hey, wanna come over to my place and help me go through my fan mail?" Gibby asked.

"Your fan mail?" Freddie frowned. "You get fan mail from iCarly viewers?"

"Oh no, it's just stuff I write to myself," Gibby explained. "And sometimes my mom throws in a few letters too. Boy, I tell you, there's nothing quite like laying back and reading you kind words about yourself."

"Um, I-I'm actually really busy," Freddie said. "I have a lot of homework. Maybe we can hang out tomorrow?"

"Oh, sure," Gibby nodded. "I can save the fan mail till then. Hey, this gives me time today to finally take the bubble bath I deserve! I have this new stuff that's supposed to prevent you from getting wrinkly in the water."

"Er, that's great Gib," Freddie said. "Well…later."

"Later," Gibby said, heading out of the school.

Freddie shook his head, continuing down the hall. As he went on his way, though, he slowed his steps as he passed by the set of lockers he used to stop at every day before and after school.

He smiled as he thought back to the days when Carly and Sam would've been there, Carly loading her book into her backpack as she reapplied her lip-gloss, and Sam grilling a steak with one of her locker appliances.

And then he would've come along and greeted them both and the three would begin talking about Spencer's latest antics or what iCarly bits to do on their next show.

But now Carly and Sam were both gone; Carly had flown across the globe to Italy with her father and Sam, well…he didn't know where she was.

And frankly, that was the hardest thing. As much as he missed Carly, at least he knew where she was. At least he had gotten to say goodbye. It was an abrupt and sudden goodbye, but it was a goodbye, nonetheless.

With Sam all he had gotten was a text that said '_I left_' after a whole week of him calling, emailing and going crazy trying to find her.

As he continued to stare at the lockers, he quickly realized how pathetic Sam would find him right now.

"_What? Are you that big of a nub that you can't even walk past a set of lockers without crying like the whimp you are?" _she'd scoff. _"So me and Carly are gone? Big deal! Man up and move on with your life!_"

Freddie couldn't help but smile as he started towards the parking lot where his mom was waiting for him. Yup, that's exactly what Sam would say…if she was here.

Which she wasn't.

….

"-And tomorrow we'll spend the entire evening looking at new drape patterns!" Marissa said happily as Freddie picked at the glazed eggplant loaf on his plate. "Won't that be fun, Freddie?"

Freddie forced himself to nod as he remembered a time his Friday nights weren't spent with his mother redecorating the apartment.

"Freddie, dear, why aren't you eating you eggplant loaf?" Marissa asked.

_Because it makes me want to gag,_ Freddie thought bitterly.

"I'm just not that hungry," Freddie said. "In fact, I think I'm going to go lie down and-"

"You're sick?" Marissa gasped. "Oh my gosh, I'll go get the rectal thermometer!"

"No, mom!" Freddie exclaimed. "I'm fine, really. I just had a long day at school, that's all. I promise, I'll eat the rest of this, er, delicious looking dinner in a little while."

He pushed his chair back and headed into his room.

"I'll be in to rub you stomach in a minute!"

"Mom!" Freddie groaned, slamming his door shut.

He flopped down on his bed and pulled out his cellphone. Like he had done on so many other nights, Freddie scrolled through his contacts, pulled up Sam's name, and pressed the phone to his ear, wondering if this time would finally be the time she answered.

But of course it wasn't.

Freddie wished that the one night she _did _call, he could've managed to get more out of her about where she was and if she was okay. But she had kept the phone call short and businesslike and Freddie hadn't even got a chance to tell her how much he missed her.

He could still remember every word of that minute and twenty-four second phone call…

He had been so excited when he saw her name flash on his screen that he had barely managed a cohesive greeting when he picked up…

…..

"_H-Hello? Sam? What-What are you-Where are you?" he said. _

"_Hey, you know that website Snorch?" Sam asked nonchalantly, as if she hadn't disappeared from Seattle without a trace three months earlier. _

"_I-What?" Freddie frowned, surprised at such a random inquiry. "Sam, where are you?"_

"_In front of a computer trying to figure some tech chiz out, but I'm not as nerdy as you, so I figured I'd give you a call," Sam said simply. "So you know Snorch?"_

"_But-what-"_

"_You know it or not?"_

"_I-Yes," Freddie said, still confused. "It's a babysitting review site, right?"_

"_Right," Sam said. "Anyway, would it be possible for you to trace where the comments on that site are coming from?"_

"_Well sure," Freddie replied. "You would just need to look up the IP addresses of those comments and from there you can pretty much determine the exact location of the computer they're coming from. But Sam, why do you need to-"_

"_And you can look IP addresses and junk?" she interrupted. _

"_Um, yeah, it's real easy," Freddie said. "But Sam where are you-"_

"_Can I email you the link to a thread of comments and have you text me where they're coming from then?" Sam asked. _

"_I-Yeah," Freddie replied. "But Sam, wait! Where are you? Are you okay-"_

"_Cool, thanks Freddison, gotta go," Sam said quickly. "Later, nub!"_

"_Sam wait!" Freddie said loudly. "Where the heck are-"_

_But the line had already gone dead._

….

Freddie wished more than anything that he'd have been able to keep her on the line for just a few more seconds. He had so many questions for her…

Where _was _she? Was she safe? And most importantly…_why _did she leave?

He knew Carly's departure had to have a lot to do with it. Those girls were like sisters, and though he knew Sam wouldn't want to stand in the way of Carly's happiness, she still had to be broken hearted when Carly announced she was leaving that night.

But was Carly really the only thing worth sticking around Seattle to her? What about Spencer and Gibby and _him_?

Did they mean nothing to her?

Freddie sighed, pulling up his pictures on his phone, scrolling to the last one he had ever taken with her. It was about a week before her and Carly had left, and the two of them were sitting at the Groovy Smoothie, combining their drinks to try and come up with a new flavor. And then T-Bo had come over and was extremely offended that the two of them had the nerve to try and upset his 'perfect smoothie recipes'.

Freddie continued to stare at the picture, wondering if they'd ever again get a chance to sip smoothies together or hang out or have him throw brutal insults his way.

He slowly sat up and poked his head out the door. He saw his mother had left the living room, probably to go into her own room to organize her disinfectant collection. So he decided to take advantage of her momentary absence and he rushed out of his room and hurried over across the hall and let himself into Spencer's apartment.

Spencer was standing in the middle of the living room, working on a sculpture that looked like a dog riding a unicycle.

"Hey, Spence," Freddie said.

"Oh, hey Freddie," Spencer replied pleasantly.

Since Carly left, Freddie noticed a definite change in Spencer. Sure, he was still the friendly artist across the hall, but he seemed to be missing a tiny bit of his childish spark.

"What are you making?" Freddie asked, sitting down on the couch.

"Oh, some vet wants this for his waiting room," Spencer explained. "I'm sort of supposed to have it done by tomorrow. I guess I should've started working on it sooner but, well, no one was here to make me."

Freddie nodded. "Well, you need any help?"

"You wanna paint the stand for me?" Spencer asked, handing Freddie a can of red paint.

"Sure," Freddie agreed. He kneeled down and began to work.

"So," Spencer said. "What have you been up to today? I saw your mom come home with drape patterns. She asked me to come help her pick some out for your living room, but I faked chest pains and ran in here.  
"Smart," Freddie chuckled. "She spent the last hour trying to get me to do that too. Maybe I should've taken Gibby up on his offer to read his fan mail."  
"Gibby gets fan mail?"  
"From himself,"

"Ah," Spencer nodded. He was silent for a moment. "So, any word from Sam yet?"

"No," Freddie sighed. "Not that I'm surprised at this point. What about you?"

"Well when Carly called earlier today while you were at school, I did ask about her," Spencer said. "And you were right…Carly _does _know where she is."

"So did she tell you?" Freddie asked anxiously.

"No, she-she said she promised Sam she wouldn't," Spencer said. "But she said Sam is safe and everything's okay and she's doing well."

"Sam really said she doesn't want us to know where she is?" Freddie frowned. "Why?"

"I don't know, probably because she knows we'd go find her and try and bring her back here," Spencer shrugged.

"Oh, right," Freddie mumbled.

Spencer stopped working on the sculpture. "You miss her a lot, don't you?"

"It's just…she just _left_," Freddie said weakly. "She just ran away. I never even got to say…I never got the chance to tell her I…I don't even know if I'll ever get to see her again."

Spencer sat down on the couch. "Hey, I know how you feel…I miss Carly more than I ever thought. And, well, even though I did get to say goodbye to her and I know I'll see her again at _some _point, it still feels so weird not having her here painting her nails at the kitchen table or laughing at me for _something_."

"I still can't believe they're both gone," Freddie said, shaking his head. "I mean it's been awhile now, you'd think we'd have gotten used to it."

"Yeah, well…maybe we will eventually," Spencer shrugged. He looked at his watch. "Aw man! I only have eight more hours to get this thing done before the vet's receptionist comes to pick it up! I've _got _to get better with deadlines. But there's been _Boy Meets World _marathons on every night this week! How am I supposed to get any work done when I'm busy being taught wisdom by Mr. Feeny?"

"Well if you want, I guess I can take over Carly's role of nagging you," Freddie grinned.

"Would you really?" Spencer asked.

"Sure, why not, it's not like I have anything better to do," Freddie shrugged. He looked over by the kitchen counter and saw a large box sitting on the floor. "Hey, what's that? Sculpture supplies?"

"Oh, no it's just some stuff Carly wants me to send to her," Spencer said. "Oh, wait, I meant to give you something…"

He stepped over the box and rummaged through it until he pulled out a giant fork.

Sam's giant fork.

"I found it while I was getting all this stuff for Carly," Spencer explained, handing Freddie the fork. "I guess Sam left it here. I figured you could have it. You can give it back to her someday."

"But Spencer, who knows if I'll ever see her again," Freddie said, staring down at the fork in his hand.

"I have a feeling you'll find a way," Spencer smiled.

…..

The next day, Freddie walked down the hall towards his apartment after school. Sam was still on his mind, as she so often was these days.

_I hope Spencer's right_, he thought to himself as he turned the corner in front of his door. _I hope I see her again…I don't think I can handle a life without Sam Puckett. _

And then, suddenly, his phone began to ring.

Figuring it was his mom demanding where he was, Freddie slowly pulled out his Pearphone and nearly dropped it when he got a look at the screen.

"Whoa…" he said softly. "Sam!"

…

**AN-That ending part is the bit we saw in Killer Tuna Jump, so we all know what happens after :) I got a request to just show how Spencer and Freddie were handling the girls' departures and I loved the idea because everybody knows that Carly's off in Italy and Sam is with Cat in L.A., but we never really got to find out how Spencer and Freddie and Gibby were during all that. I thought it was cool to think about how they felt after two important people in their lives both left in just one night. **


	480. Chapter 480

_Biochemistry_

"Hey, when did you two get here?" Carly asked, coming downstairs and seeing Sam and Freddie in her living room. "It's only ten in the morning…Sam, shouldn't you still be asleep?"

"Eh, my mom woke me up using her new elliptical machine," Sam said, looking up from the desktop computer she was seated at on the Shay's countertop.

"Your mom started working out?" Carly said. "That's great!"

"Oh, I didn't say she was working out," Sam said.

"Well what else would she be doing on an elliptical machine?" Carly frowned.

"Trust me, you don't want to know," Freddie said from the couch, where he was scrolling along on his Pearpad.

Carly shuddered. "So what are you two doing?"

"Fredwad and I decided we wanted to do something fun tonight for our thirteen-month anniversary next week," Sam said. "So we've been looking up cool things to do in Seattle all morning to try and find something."

"Oh," Carly nodded. "Well, I'd offer you guys some advice but some of us have never been in a relationship for thirteen months, so I have no idea what you would even _do _during a thirteen-month anniversary. You know, lately it just feels that I'll never find that one guy who I'll-"

"Hey, I found something!" Sam exclaimed, interrupting Carly.

"Sure, I wasn't just spilling out my soul," Carly shrugged.

"Me too!" Freddie said. "Baby, this one is amazing. How would you like to spend our anniversary at the new Museum of Culture and Phenomenons?"

Sam blinked. "_What_?"

"Look, it says here that this museum offers over three hundred exhibits that show all sorts of amazing things from countries all over the world!" Freddie said.

"Okay, _how _do you think that's actually something I would want to do after dating me for over a year?" Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"Well think about how much it would help us with our history project at school!" Freddie said.

"Again, what makes you think-"

"Alright, well let's hear _your _suggestion," Freddie said, crossing his arms.

"Okay, well you know that waterpark off that highway?" Sam asked. "The one with the 200 foot slide and wave pool that can cause waves higher than buildings?"

"You mean the waterpark that got shut down because it didn't meet the state's safety code?" Freddie said.

"Yeah!" Sam nodded. "Well good news…they're reopening! We can spend our anniversary plunging headfirst off of the country's tallest, craziest waterslides!"

"Sam, _you've _been dating _me _for thirteen months and seriously think I would want to spend our anniversary _dying_?"

"You wouldn't die…probably," Sam said. "And it beats a lousy museum!"

"It does not!" Freddie snapped. "Museums are educational and stimulating and _safe_!"

"This waterpark is fun and unique and _cool_!" Sam retorted.

"Guys, guys!" Carly said before any further argument could erupt. "Look, you guys need to decide _together_ where you want to go on your anniversary. You can't just keep arguing about it. If Sam doesn't want to go to the museum and Freddie doesn't want to go to the waterpark, then you need to just figure out a new place…wow, that was good advice. Too bad _I _don't have my own anniversary plans to use it on."

"Well I don't want to go anywhere other than that waterpark," Sam said stubbornly.

"Then I still want to go to the museum," Freddie said firmly.

"Well then you two better decide how to pick between the two," Carly said. "I guess you could flip a coin or draw straws or-"

"Or…" Sam said thoughtfully. "We could have a contest!"

"A contest?" Carly repeated

"Yeah, I like that contest idea," Freddie nodded. "What do you have in mind?"

"I'm thinking we sneak into the MMA arena, get some boxing gloves-"

"We are not going to fight, Sam!" Freddie said.

"Why, scared you'll lose?" Sam smirked.

"Yes!" Freddie exclaimed. "Why don't we just-Wait, I think I have an idea. Sam, you eat, what, roughly a million pounds of meat a week?"

"Where you going with this, Fredbutt?" Sam asked slowly.

"Well," Freddie said. "If you can go the whole week before our anniversary without eating a _bite _of meat…I'll go to the waterpark with you."

"What?" Sam cried. "Why do I have to give up meat? What about you?"

"Find something for me to give up for the week then," Freddie shrugged. "You know, if you can find a flaw in my character."

"Oh, you have your work cut out for you, Sam," Carly chuckled.

"I know," Sam beamed. "Where should I even begin?"

"Hey!" Freddie said indignantly.

"What about the his weird obsession with eating apples lately?" Carly suggested.

"Or his addiction to _Galaxy Wars_?" Sam said. "Or the weird way he says 'during'?"

"Okay, I say 'during' perfectly fine!" Freddie snapped.

"Or his lame shirts, those gross chai lattes he always gets, his stupid Spanish outbursts-"

"Do you have a _list_?" Freddie frowned.

"I got it!" Sam said, ignoring her boyfriend's comments. "You have to give up correcting people for a whole week!"

"Oh, that's a good one!" Carly nodded.  
"What? I do not correct people!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Dude…yes you do," Sam said. "Last week you corrected Mr. Whales at least a dozen times during math class. For no good reason!"  
"Well his method of finding the degrees in an angle on a triangle is completely absurd!" Freddie defended.

"And the other day you gave Spencer a whole lecture on why he was wrong about the paper towels he was buying," Carly pointed out.

"His were so flimsy!" Freddie said. "He'd have better luck wiping up spills with a grapefruit!"

"And remember that time you-"

"Okay, okay, I correct people once in awhile!" Freddie conceded. "But if I can last a whole week without doing that, we go to the museum for our anniversary. Sound fair, baby?"

Sam bit her lip. "Fine, I guess that's fair."

"Good," Freddie said, satisfied, holding out his hand. "Let's shake on it."

Sam stared at his hand for a moment before licking her own hand and shaking Freddie's.

"Strangely, that doesn't bother me as much as it used to," Freddie said. "Alright, well I guess now that that's settled, why don't we head down to the Groovy Smoothie?"

"Okay," Sam agreed. "You in, Carls?"

"Sure, Spencer used all the milk in his bath last night, so there's nothing here for me to eat for breakfast," Carly nodded.

"Oh wait, let me just grab some of that special bacon first," Sam said, starting towards the fridge.

"Um, Sam?" Freddie said. "Are you forgetting that bacon is a type of _meat_?"

"I-Oh," Sam frowned. "But-That starts _now_? Come on, can I just have one last piece of bacon? Please?"

"No!" Freddie said. "We had a deal, Sam, and it starts now! You eat that bacon and I win and we'll spend our anniversary at the museum learning all about-"

Sam cut him off as she pressed her lips to his.

"Please?" she said again sweetly, looking up at him. "For me?"

"I-Well alright," Freddie nodded, still in a daze from Sam's sneak attack. "We can start after you've had one last piece of bacon."

….

"I can't take this!" Sam snapped as she stormed into the studio a few days later. "I need ham! Steak! Meatballs!"

"Sam, it's only been four days," Carly pointed out.

"Four long, _long _days!" Sam moaned. "You know how much I want to sink my teeth into some fried chicken right now? Man, I don't know how much longer I can hold out. I'm gonna be stuck going to that stupid museum!"

"Come on, Freddie's just as much on the edge as you are," Carly reasoned. "I mean didn't you see him in school these past few days?"

"No, I've been too busy thinking about all the meat I haven't been eating!"

"Well him not being able to correct people has totally driven him insane," Carly said. "Today in our English class, Gibby confused _Frankenstein_ with _Dracula_ and I swear, _blood_ was coming out his ears from biting his tongue."  
"Sweet," Sam grinned. "I _knew _he's never be able to hold it together. But that doesn't help my meat cravings! If I don't get some soon, I'm going to explode! Do you know how many gross, disgusting salads I've eaten these past four days? More than I ever have my whole life!"

"Okay, well maybe you just need to think about something to take your mind off of meat," Carly suggested. "You can paint or do your homework or read a book-"

"_Or_," Sam said, a sly grin creeping onto her face. "I can _sabatoge _Freddie. I can tempt him to correct something so badly he'll cave in no time!"

"Sam," Carly sighed. "You guys agreed to have a nice, fair contest. You can't _try _and make Freddie lose on purpose. Do you think he would do that to you? Do you think _he'd _go and-"

She was interrupted as Freddie himself walked into the studio carrying a bucket of chicken.

"Afternoon, ladies," he said pleasantly as Sam tried not to jump up and grab that bucket of chicken. "Ready for a little iCarly action?"

"Okay, well, it looks like this nice, fair contest has turned dirty," Carly sighed.

"You-You hate _Tub of Chicken_!" Sam exclaimed, her mouth filling with saliva as she watched Freddie bite into a wing.

"Yeah, but I was just really wanting some of the best chicken in Seattle," Freddie said, waving the wing in front of Sam's face. "Hey, I bet if you kiss me…you can actually _taste _this delicious fried chicken."

"Y-Yeah," Sam said weakly. "I-I-bet you could-No! Nope, not happening, Fredward! I'm not losing this thing that easy!"

"Fine," Freddie smirked as Sam began to set up the green screen for the show. "But you know you'll give in way before me. Oh, hang on there Sam, you're setting up the screen wro-"

"What was that?" Sam asked, raising an eyebrow. "I'm setting up the screen _wrong_? Why Freddie, baby, that sounds like it would be a _correction_."

"I wonder what it's like to have _normal_ friends," Carly said, shaking her head.

"I know, and that's something I don't do," Freddie said. "I was just going to say you were setting up the screen…um, _perfectly_. It-It's _supposed _to tilt like that."

"I think I did it even better than you, don't you think?" Sam grinned.

"Oh…yes, much better," Freddie said, pulling on a strained smile.

"Let's just start the show," Carly said, rolling her eyes.

"Right, right," Freddie said quickly, tossing Sam her remote. "In five, four, three, two…"

"I'm Carly!" Carly said loudly.

"And I'm Sam!" Sam grinned. "And this is-"

"iCarly!"

"Tonight we're going to show you guys what happens when you fill a pair of boxers with grape jelly!" Carly said. "Spoiler alert, it gets _quite _sticky."

"But _first_," Sam cut in. "We're going to show you a video of Gibby getting surprised while cleaning out his cat's litter box."

"Um, Sam?" Freddie said. "We're not showing that video until _after-_"

"What? What were you saying?" Sam asked. "Surely you weren't _correcting _me, right? Because, if you were, it'd be a one-way ticket down the Spine Squeezer Slide O'Furry."

"No, never," Freddie said. "Um, Carly? Do-Do _you _have anything to say about Sam's new schedule that deviates from the old schedule that I spent over an hour figuring out?"

"Please leave me out of this," Carly sighed.

"Fine!" Freddie said, picking up his tub of chicken again. "Then while we show the video, I'll stand here and enjoy my greasy, succulent chicken!"

"Enjoy your chicken all you want!" Sam snapped. "And while you do, I'll just recite all forty-six states in alphabetical order! Let's see, first there's California, Delaware, Detroit, Mississippi-"

"Oh, I'm so _glad _you're taking up an interest in geography!" Freddie said, a small vein on his forehead throbbing. "That's so great…almost as great as this chicken! Mmmm, meat!"

Carly took the camera and pointed it at herself. "While Sam and Freddie continue this pointless and very sad episode, please enjoy this prerecorded video of Spencer trying to intelligently flirt with a biochemistry student at the library."

Once she pulled up the video, she stepped in between her friends, who both looked like they were about to explode.

"Guys!" she said loudly. "Look, I get that you're both trying to get your way for your anniversary, but this is getting a little out of hand! Shouldn't you go somewhere on your anniversary that you would _both _have fun at anyway? So why don't you forget this silly contest and-"

"You know what would go great with this chicken? Some ribs!" Freddie said, ignoring Carly's speech. "And I'm going to go get some!"

"And while you do, let me tell you about the proper way to back up a hard drive!" Sam said, storming off after him out of the iCarly studio. "Step 1: delete all your files and-"

"You guys!" Carly yelled after them. "Guys, we're in the middle of a show! You can't just leave me-and they're gone. Nice!"

….

"One day left, Sam," Freddie said on the day before the couple's anniversary. "There's no way you're gonna make it. I can practically see the dancing steak bones in your head."

"Please, like you can go another second without correcting anybody," Sam sneered. "Trust me, I've got this way more than you do."

"Maybe," Freddie said simply, reaching into his bag and pulling out a beef jerky stick. "Or maybe I'll just sit here and enjoy some smoked jerky."

Sam narrowed her eyes as she tried to ignore her growling stomach. She pulled out a sheet of paper. "Yeah, well…why don't I start an outline for that history project we're doing together? What was it on, the French Revolution? That was the war with the Indians and the cowboys, right?"

"You know what would taste even better than this beef jerky?" Freddie snapped, reaching into his bag again. "Pork rinds!"

Sam clenched her fists. "Well…Hey, I have an idea! For our project why don't we use finger puppets for the presentation instead of writing the twelve-page paper?"

"Oh look, I have ham!" Freddie yelled, grabbing another container from his bag. "Tasty, tasty ham!"

"What about writing our entire report in pink gel pen?" Sam cried. "That won't effect the final grade at all, will it?"

A silence befell the two, and for a moment, nobody moved. And then finally, at the same time, Sam and Freddie both screamed, "Give me that!"

Freddie yanked the paper Sam had been writing on out of her hands and Sam snatched Freddie's ham.

As Sam began devouring the meat, Freddie anxiously began crossing out and correcting Sam's work.

"_What _is going on in here?" Carly demanded, bursting in through the front door of the apartment. "I can here you two all the way down the hall!"

But Sam and Freddie paid her not attention as Sam continued to shovel the ham into her mouth and Freddie muttered corrections under his breath.

"Guys!" Carly said again. "You guys! Oh for crying out loud…"

She reached into her bag and pulled out a small whistle and blew it loudly, causing Sam and Freddie to both jump.

"What are you guys _doing_?" she exclaimed.

"Freddie lost the contest!" Sam announced, her mouth still filled. "I win!"

"You do not! You lost!" Freddie countered. "_I _win!"

"No you don't!"

"Well you sure don't!"

"Oh yes I do!"

"Please, I caved _after _you caved!"

"No! You caved _before-_"

"Enough!" Carly cried, silencing the two once again. "It was a _tie_! Both of you have completely_ lost it_ this week, so I'm calling it a tie!"

"But she-"

"He didn't-"

"A tie!" Carly said firmly. "Now, why don't you two act like _people _and pull yourselves away from your meat and your obsessive correcting and figure out what you're going to do for your anniversary. And nobody is going to any deadly waterparks or boring museums!"

"But-"

"Why can't-"

"Do it!" Carly yelled. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go take a bubble bath and try to relax! You know, most people can walk into their own homes without their blood pressure skyrocketing!"

Sam and Freddie watched Carly disappear upstairs.

"So…" Freddie said, looking over at his girlfriend. "Dinner and a movie then?"

"Why not?" Sam nodded. She took another bite of the ham. "Oh man, _how _did I survive for so long without this?"

"I don't know how my brain managed not to burst into flames," Freddie said, staring happily down at all the corrections he had made. "But, you know…I totally would've lasted longer than you if you hadn't been purposefully trying to make me lose."

"Yeah right! I would've lasted longer than you and you know it!" Sam smirked.

Freddie raised an eyebrow. "New contest?"

"You know it, baby."


	481. Chapter 481

_Salesman_

Eleven-year old Freddie Benson walked up the eight flights of stairs behind his mother. He was moving into his new home today after his mom had gotten a new job as a nurse at the local hospital.

"Now Freddie, I know you must be very, very scared to be moving into a new environment, but don't worry," his mother said. "I'm going to make sure no icky germs or bacteria finds its way into our new home."

"I'm not really that afraid of germs or anything, mom," Freddie said. "I'm more afraid of not making any friends here."  
Marissa gasped. "How can you say you're not afraid of germs? Haven't I raised you right?"

"But mom, they're so small and-"

"That's it, mister! I can see you're already rebelling here!" Marissa said firmly, unlocking apartment 8D. "You're getting a tick bath and then you and I are going to sit and do a nice puzzle!"

"Aw, mom!" Freddie groaned as he followed her into the apartment. "Not another tick bath!"

"Freddie!" Marissa squeaked. "_Again _with the sass? Maybe this isn't the right apartment building for us after all! Now you wait right here, mister, while I go run your bath!"

Freddie sighed as his mother hurried into the bathtub. His mom's overprotectiveness was beginning to get a little out of hand. But he figured it would stop after a few more years. After all, she couldn't hover over him when he was a teenager and force him to take tick baths forever. She'd back off eventually.

Freddie took advantage of his few moments of freedom and looked around the new apartment. It seemed nice, and he supposed it would look even better when all of the boxes that were scattered around were unpacked.

He turned towards the door and his eyes widened when he saw that it was still open a crack; his mom must've not closed it all the way!

This was the chance of a lifetime. Freddie quickly opened the door fully and stepped back out into the hall and looked around.

_I wonder if anyone my age lives here, _Freddie thought to himself. _Maybe I can finally meet some friends that my mom will let me hang out with and_-

"Spencer, I don't think dad will be too happy about you using his credit card to buy all these soda bottles," he suddenly heard a voice say from around the corner. "Why do we need all this soda for anyway?"

"I'm going to make a cool robot sculpture!" another voice said happily. "Wait till you see it; it will totally be worth it. Just, um, don't mention this when dad calls, Carly. And tell him I'm still doing great in law school!"

And right the two people turned down the hall, and Freddie saw who was talking.

One of them was a tall adult who was carrying a bunch of bags filled with soda liters, wearing a tie-dyed t-shirt. And standing next to him was a small brunette girl who looked to be about his age.

"But I don't want to lie to dad!" the girl said.

"Carly, Carly, Carly," the man chuckled. "Would I, the wise adult in charge of you, ask you to lie? Just don't say anything! That's not lying!"

"I don't think-" the girl began, but then she caught sight of Freddie. "Hi!" she said brightly.

"H-Hi," Freddie said.

"My name's Carly," the girl smiled. "Hey, are you our new neighbors?"

"Oh, um, yeah, I guess," Freddie nodded. "My name's Freddie."

"Nice to meet you, Freddie, this is Spencer, my older brother," Carly introduced.

"Hey there, Freddie," Spencer said, shaking the small boy's hand. "You're going to love living here. Well, except for our mean doorman…and elevator system is really weird, sometimes you just get random people stopping in the middle of your living room. Oh, and-"

"It's a great building!" Carly cut in quickly, elbowing her brother in the side. "Anyway, I'm so excited to finally have a friend in the building!"

_Did she just say I was a friend_? Freddie thought excitedly.

"I mean my best friend, Sam, comes over all the time, but now I have someone right across the hall too!" Carly said. "Freddie, why don't you come over to my place? You can help me and Spencer make this really cool sculpture that looks like a dinosaur and a-"

Just then Freddie's apartment door opened up his mother came out.

"Fredward Benson! _What _are you doing out in this hallway by yourself?" she exclaimed. "I leave you alone for two minutes to get your tick bath ready and you wander off! You could be kidnapped by salesmen or exposed to harmful viruses! You know you can't just-oh, hello," she said, looking over at Carly and Spencer.

"Um hi…you must be Freddie's mother," Spencer said slowly, looking at this woman as if she was from another planet.

"Yes, now who are you?" Marissa snapped.

"Oh, um, I'm Spencer," Spencer replied. "And me and my little sister Carly live across the hall from you guys."

"Oh, _splendid_!"

"I-I feel that was a little sarcastic," Spencer said, confused. "Um, anyway, Mrs.…Benson, is it? My little sister Carly just wanted to know if your son could come over and hang out for a little bit."

"Can I mom, please?" Freddie begged.

"Absolutely not," Marissa said firmly. "You're far too young to gallivant around with strangers! Now you come with me right now so I can give you a tick bath!"

"Tick bath?" Carly repeated.

"Gallivant?" Spencer frowned.

"But mom!" Freddie moaned. "I'm eleven years old! I think I can handle going across the hall and-"

"More sass?" Marissa gasped. "That's it, mister! I'm canceling the nature channel! You must be picking up this rebellious attitude from that show about the monkeys!"

"Look, Mrs. Benson, Freddie will be fine across the hall," Spencer said quickly. "I'll be there the whole time!"  
Marissa stared at his armful of soda bottles and colorful shirt and pursed her lips.

"You can even come over too!" Carly said. "Right, Spencer?"

"_What_? Oh, yeah, right," Spencer nodded. "Please, new neighbor who apparently gives her son tick baths…stay for dinner. I'm making my famous recipe!"

"Mom, please?" Freddie said again. "I promise I'll take a tick bath every day next week without complaining or anything!"

Marissa let out a long sigh. "Well…alright. I assume your home has been thoroughly disinfected within the last ten days?"

"Oh, yes…of course," Spencer nodded, opening his door.

Freddie could hardly believe his luck! He was going to get to hang out with someone other than his mom or weird cousins for once!

"Ah, what an…_interesting _home you have," Marissa cringed, looking around the apartment, which was filled with colors and odd looking sculptures; much nicer, in Freddie's opinion, than his own drab home.

"Come on, Freddie," Carly smiled, taking his hand as she led him over to the stairs. "Let me show you around!"

"Freddie! Careful on the stairs!" Marissa called after the two kids. "You don't want to fall and get a concussion!"

"Sorry about my mom," Freddie said as he followed Carly. "She's a little…weird."

"Don't worry about it," Carly chuckled. "Hey, you said you were eleven? I am too! Are you going to go to Ridgeway?"

"Yeah, I am," Freddie nodded.

"Awesome! I go there too!" Carly said, turning down a small hall and pushing open a glass door that led to a large, cluttered room. "You'll really like it."  
Freddie beamed. This girl was the nicest girl he had ever met! She had the prettiest hair he had ever seen too, and she smelled like watermelon.

_I think I really like this girl_, Freddie thought to himself. _In fact…I love her! Who wouldn't love someone as kind and sweet and pretty as Carly?_

"So this is sort of our everything room," Carly said as they stepped into the room. "Spencer stores his art supplies here, I do homework up here and me and my friend Sam watch T.V. and just chill out up here. Hey, you'll have to meet Sam, too! You'll _love _her."

_Not as much as I love you_, Freddie thought.

"So," he said quickly. "Where are your parents? Is Spencer just watching you until they get home?"

"No," Carly laughed. "Spencer's kind of like my parent…even though he's a little goofy. See, a couple years ago my dad's naval base got stationed overseas. So I live here with Spencer."

"Whoa…" Freddie said. "You're so lucky."

"Yeah, Spencer's the best," Carly nodded. "So, what do you like to do for fun?"

"I like computers," Freddie stuff. "And cameras. Oh, and _Galaxy Wars_. Do you like that stuff?"

"Um, well, no, not really," Carly admitted.

_That's okay, you're still perfect._

"But I'm sure we'll still be really good friends," Carly said. "Hey, why don't I show you some of the textbooks you'll be using at school so you can-"

"Carly!" Spencer called upstairs. "Sam just got here! She's on her way up!"

"Oh, perfect!" Carly smiled. "Now you can meet Sam!"

Freddie grinned excitedly. _Two _new friends? How could this day get any better?  
"Hey, Carls," a small blonde girl said, letting herself into the room. "Who's that crazy lady downstairs with Spencer? She's cleaning all your counters with this weird-who's that guy?"

She looked over at Freddie with a scowl on her face.

"Hi," Freddie said politely.

"Whatever," Sam snapped. She turned to Carly. "So who's the doof?"

"He's not a doof, Sam," Carly sighed. "This is Freddie. Him and his mom moved across the hall. He's going to be going to Ridgeway with us, isn't that cool?"

Sam cringed. "Cool? Carly, this kid looks like he doesn't even know the definition of the word cool."

"Yes I do!" Freddie said indignantly. How could the sweet, polite Carly be friends with someone who was such a-a-_mean_ person?

"Judging by your geeky shirt and lame shoes, I doubt it," Sam smirked.

"Sam!" Carly said firmly. "Be nice. Apologize to Freddie so we can all play a game or something while we wait for Spencer to finish cooking dinner."

"But he-"

"Sam…"

Sam sighed and turned back to Freddie. "Sorry…"

"Um, it's okay," Freddie mumbled.

"Good," Carly smiled. "Now I'm going to run up to my room to go get Monopoly. Spencer used all the game pieces and melted them because he got bored the other day, but we can use checkers pieces instead. Be back in a sec!"

As Carly ran out, Freddie couldn't help but stare at Sam.

_I wonder why she seems so mean_? he thought. _But oh well, at least Carly's not that way. Maybe one day her and I could get married! That would be the best! Man, being in love is awesome!_

"What are you looking at, nub?" Sam snapped.  
"What's a nub?" Freddie asked.

"What you are," Sam said simply. She plopped down on one of the beanbag chairs and pulled a bag of potato chips out of her backpack. "Man, I can't believe Carly would actually invite someone as dumb-looking as you up here. She's too nice sometimes…"

"Hey, um, Carly said we'd be eating dinner soon," Freddie said. "Maybe-Maybe you shouldn't be eating those chips."  
Sam stood back up and grabbed the collar of Freddie's shirt. "No one. Tells Sam Puckett. What to do. Got it?"

"Um, y-yes," Freddie gulped quickly. "Now let go of my shirt! You're getting crumbs all over it."

Sam rolled her eyes as she released him, causing him to stumble onto the floor.

"That was really rude of you, you know," Freddie said, straightening his collar.

"Who cares?" Sam shrugged. "I just hope Carly gets bored of you soon and kicks you to the curb."

"Carly's not going to get bored of me!" Freddie exclaimed. "Because I love her! In fact, one day, we're going to get _married_!"

"Oh, _are _you now?" Sam laughed. "No one would marry you if you were the last guy on earth."

"Hey!" Freddie frowned. "You're just a-a-bully!"

"Nice comeback," Sam said sarcastically, finishing up the last of her chips.

She quickly stepped over and shoved the bag down his pants.

"Ah! What did you do that for?" Freddie demanded. "Now I have crumbs where crumbs should never be!"

"Because it was fun," Sam shrugged. "I'm gonna go grab a soda."  
And with that she turned on her heel and headed out of the room.

As Freddie yanked the bag of chips out of his pants, he felt really steamed!

_That Sam Puckett is just a jerk! _he thought furiously. _Good think Carly's nothing like her. I mean it, I really don't like that Sam. I don't, I __**don't**_!

….

_Twelve years later_

"-And do you, Samantha Puckett, take Fredward Benson, to be your lawfully wedded husband? In sickness and in health? Till death do you part?"

Sam smiled across at Freddie. "I do."

"And do you, Fredward Benson, take Samantha Puckett to be your lawfully wedded wife? In sickness and in health? Till death do you part?"

"I do," Freddie beamed at Sam, feeling like the luckiest man alive. "I _do_."


	482. Chapter 482

_Clothing_

It was six in the morning in the Benson household. Sam and Freddie were both asleep, warm under their covers. Freddie, had a loose am hung over Sam's waist and Sam's face was buried in her pillow.

Both were so peaceful and in such a deep slumber that it seemed nothing could wake them…

"It's Christmas!" came a sudden loud yell as their bedroom door burst open and their eight-year old son, Tyler, jumped up onto his parents' bed.

"Tyler," Sam moaned, sitting up as Tyler hopped onto Freddie's lap, emitting a groan from her husband. "It's _six_."

"It's Christmas, mommy!" Tyler said in his sweetest voice that he knew very well his mother couldn't resist.

"Barely," Freddie yawned.

"Did Santa come? Did I get presents?" Tyler asked anxiously. "Do you think he got me rollerblades like I wanted?"

"I dunno," Freddie said. "But let's wait until your brother and sisters wake up before we go and-"

"It's Christmas!" twelve-year old Emma exclaimed, running into the bedroom with Ashton at her heels.

"Come on, it's time to open presents!" Ashton beamed.

"You remember the last Christmas we got to sleep in?" Sam asked Freddie.

"I think it was four kids ago," Freddie smirked.

"Alright, you guys win," Sam sighed, getting out of bed. "But someone's going to have to go wake up Jason. I don't want to start without him and-"

"People! Why are we still upstairs?" sixteen-year old Jason demanded, coming out of his bedroom. "We have piles of presents to unwrap! Let's _move _everyone!"

"Alright, alright," Freddie said, stepping in front of his children. "Now, we're not going to have a repeat of last year where everything was open and done with in under twenty minutes. So this year we're going to _calmly _go downstairs, your mother and I will make you breakfast and then we'll take our time opening the presents and-"

"Charge!" Sam yelled and the kids all cheered, shoving past Freddie as they sped downstairs.

"Ow! Sam!" Freddie said indignantly as Sam helped him up.

"Well you can't ruin Christmas by making it _organized_," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Now come on! Let's get down there so we can see them open their presents!"

"Okay, okay," Freddie sighed.

The couple hurried down to the living room where their four children were happily going through their gifts.

"Santa brought me a helmet!" Tyler said. "And kneepads and arm pads. But why would he bring me this stuff and no rollerblades? Whoa! Look at this new videogame!"

"I thought Santa _did _get him rollerblades?" Freddie whispered to Sam as Tyler carelessly tossed aside a few articles of clothing he had gotten.

"Nah, I wound up wrapping them up and putting them under the tree from us," Sam said quietly. "I figure why should Santa get all the credit when we're the ones who went out and bought the stuff."

"Ah, clever," Freddie chuckled.

"Oh my God! Look at this Pearpod I got!" Ashton cried happily.

"That was in _my _pile!" Emma said, grabbing the device from her sister. "It's my Pearpod."

"No way! I totally pulled it out of_ my _stocking!" Ashton retorted.

"No you didn't!"

"Yes I-"

"Girls, look, there's _another _Pearpod under all this wrapping paper," Freddie said quickly.

"Oh, cool!" Emma said, tossing the first Pearpod back to Ashton. "Hey Ashton, now we can download all those songs we have saved on our computer onto these!"

"Like Santa would be stupid enough to bring those two _more _things for them to fight over," Freddie mumbled to Sam.

"Jason! Look! I got a fencing stick like you and dad have!" Tyler said to his older brother. "Now I can come with you guys and fence, right?"

"Sure, if you don't annoy the chiz out of me," Jason grinned.

"I love these earrings," Ashton said.

"And this soccer ball is just what I wanted!" Emma said, tossing the ball into the air.

"Yes, Santa's amazing," Sam laughed. "But don't we want to open the other gifts now?"

"Yeah, let's see what we got each other," Freddie said.

"Oh! I want to give Emma my present first!" Ashton said, hopping up get her gift.

"Wait, I wanted to give Ashton her present first!" Emma said.

"Alright, just exchange your gifts at the same time," Sam said quickly before an argument could erupt.

The twins handed each other a box and tore the paper off their respective presents.

"Whoa!" Ashton gasped, holding up a small music box. "This is just like the music box you broke messing around on that mini-trampoline in our room last month."

"It _is _the music box I broke last month," Emma said. "I felt sort of bad that I broke it, so I looked on the web and found this place in the mall that fixes those sorts of things. So I took all my allowance and had it repaired."

"Aw, Sam, isn't that the sweetest thing you've ever heard?" Freddie whispered.

"Dude, can we have one Christmas where you don't cry about something?" Sam sighed.

"I can't help it! Our girls are angels!"

"Yeah, remember that next time they wake you up on your day off screaming at each other," Sam smirked.

"Emma, that's the nicest thing you've ever done," Ashton said softly.

"I _did _break it in the first place, remember?" Emma shrugged as she pulled her own gift out of the wrapping paper. "Hey! You got those new track shoes I've been wanting for forever! I've been looking everywhere for them; they're sold out in all the stores! How'd you get them?"

"I waited in a three hour line last week when the shoe store finally got a new shipment in," Ashton replied. "That's where I was when I told you I was studying with Clarissa."

The twins stared at each other for a moment before stepping towards each other and throwing their arms around the other.

"Okay…that was sweet," Sam admitted.

"I want to go next!" Tyler said, jumping up. "I want to give mom and dad their present from me!"

"You got us a present, honey?" Sam said, surprised.

"You didn't have to do that," Freddie said.

"Yes I did, everyone gets presents on Christmas, even if they're old and not a kid," Tyler said, handing his parents a flat box.

"Did he just call us old?" Sam asked Freddie.

"Let's not kill the moment," Freddie said as Sam began to tare off the wrapping paper.

"Aw!" Sam said, holding up the present. It was frame that Tyler had painted on his own with a picture of the whole family inside. "Tyler! This is the sweetest present ever!"

"Yeah, you made it yourself?" Freddie asked.

"Uh-huh!" he nodded proudly.

"Lucky…he's still little enough to get by with homemade presents," Emma mumbled under her breath.

"He better enjoy it while he can," Jason nodded.

"Alright, I'm next," Freddie said, picking up a small box from under the tree. "This one is for my beautiful wife; the mother of my four children; the woman who makes me feel like-"

"Ugh!" Ashton cringed. "There are _kids _here!"

Freddie rolled his eyes as he handed the box to Sam. "Here you go, baby. Hope you like it."

"Hmmm, little box? I wonder what _this _could be?" Sam said jokingly as she began to unwrap it. "You know, no offense or anything, but jewelry is sort of becoming a predictable thing with you, Frednub. I mean I love everything you get me, but I don't even have that much space left in my-Holy chiz!"

She pulled out two slips of paper from the small box. "These are tickets to see the final fight of this year's MMA tournament in New Mexico!"

"That's right," Freddie chuckled. "Next month you and I are going to take a kids-free vacation to see that fight and have a little _alone _time."

"What's alone time?" Tyler asked innocently.

"Something that's going to make us vomit in about three seconds," Emma said, clutching her stomach.

"You're the best," Sam smiled, giving him a quick peck on his lips. "And here I thought I had you beat with presents this year. Well, hopefully you still like what I got you. Here."

She grabbed her present to him and tossed it onto his lap.

After taking a moment to _neatly _take the wrapping paper, Freddie's mouth dropped open as he held up a thin piece of poster board.

"Sam," he said. "This-This looks like it's one of the original movie posters form _Galaxy Wars_."

"Well _duh_, because it _is_," Sam said. "And some dude named Paul Romero even signed it. I don't know who he is, but I think he's sort of important because-"

"Paul Romero signed this?" Freddie yelled. "Are you _serious_? Sam! He's the actor who plays Lou Groundrunner in all the films! He's like, the _essence _of _Galaxy Wars_!"

"Oh…well cool," Sam shrugged.

"Oh man, I need to get this framed," Freddie said, hugging his wife with one arm as he continued to hold to poster in his other. "This baby is going right above our bed."  
"Yeah, think again, nub," Sam said. She glanced over at Jason, who was sitting quietly between Tyler and the twins.

"Hey, Jason?" she said. "You've been pretty quiet this morning. What did you get in your stocking?"

"I didn't have a stocking," Jason replied.

"No stocking?" Tyler gasped. "Were you bad or something?"

"Why didn't Jason get a stocking?" Ashton asked.

"Yeah, he's too much of a goody-two-shoes to get into trouble," Emma nodded.

"Hmm," Freddie said thoughtfully. "That _is _weird. Maybe there was some sort of mix-up."

"No, his stocking's right here," Sam said, reaching across Freddie and picking up a seemingly empty stocking and tossing it at her oldest child. "There you go, Jason. See, it just got misplaced."

Jason frowned. "But it's empty."

"Is it?" Freddie said, raising an eyebrow. "Maybe you should, you know, reach down in there and check that out for sure."

"But it's pretty clear nothing's in here," Jason said, though he stuck his hand down into the stocking anyway. "The stocking's totally flat and-"

He suddenly stopped talking as he slowly pulled out a single key from the bottom of the stocking.

"A key?" Emma said. "What are you going to with a key?"

"Boy, you must've done something _really _bad this year," Tyler said.

"Maybe that key _goes _to something," Sam said, grinning. "_Something _that might be outside in the driveway…"

"No way…" Jason said, scrambling to his feet and running out to the driveway. "No, there's no way-Oh my God!"

The family ran outside after Jason where he was standing in front of a brand new car.

"I got a car?" Jason exclaimed. "I got a car! I got a _car_!"

He ran over to his parents and hugged them both. "Thank you guys so much! You're the best parents _ever_!"  
"Why are you thanking _them_?" Tyler said. "The key was in your stocking so that means it was from Santa."

"Well then thank you, _Santa_," Jason beamed, rustling his little brother's hair. "Hey, mom? Dad? Can I take this for a test run?"

"Sure, it's your car," Sam nodded. "Just be careful."  
"I want to come!" Tyler said. "Can I come with you Jason?"

"Us too!" Ashton said as Emma nodded.

"Fine, you all can come," Jason said, rolling his eyes. "But wipe your feet! I don't want my car to get dirty!"

"Hurry back," Freddie said. "We still have more presents to unwrap and then your mom's making her famous cinnamon rolls. Fresh from the tube."

"I'll just go around the block," Jason assured him. "Seriously, you guys are the best! I'll never ask for anything ever again."

"Sure, we'll see how long that lasts," Sam chuckled.

Sam and Freddie watched Jason back out of the driveway and begin to drive down the street.

"Told you he'd freak out," Sam said, looking up at Freddie.

"Obviously, what sixteen-year old kid wouldn't freak out about getting a new car?" Freddie pointed out. He put his arm around Sam. "He deserves it. He's a good kid."

"I know," Sam said, resting her head on his shoulder. "But you know now all the others are going to be wanting cars too."

"Oh jeez," Freddie sighed. "Maybe we should've thought this through more."


	483. Chapter 483

_Topic_

"Emma! For the _millionth _time; study!" Sam exclaimed as she argued with her sixteen-year old daughter. "You have a math test in three days and if you don't do well on it you're going to have to take the class again _next _year, which means you're not going to graduate with the rest of your class!"

"Mom, come on, just let me take a little study break," Emma begged.

"Break?" Sam yelled. "To get a break you actually have to do some _work _first!"

"I've studied!"

"Yeah, _how_?" Sam snapped. "Your math book has been downstairs this entire weekend!"

"Oh…" Emma said lamely.

"Emma, are you not getting how important it is for you to pass this class?" Sam said loudly. "You've gotten D's on your last three tests! If you don't get at least a B on this one, you're in real trouble! I'm serious, you're not leaving this house or getting your phone or your laptop back until after this test!"

"Ugh!" Emma moaned. "Since when did you turn into the parent that sucks the fun out of everything?"

"Since now!" Sam replied. "Now go _study_! Your dad will be home in an hour to help you, and you have a sister, a best friend and a boyfriend who are all doing _fine _in the class. You have all the tools you need. Now _go_!"

Emma stormed back out to the other room, where Quincy, Ashton, and Quincy were all sitting and studying.

"Wow, you made _mom _yell at you about school," Ashton smirked as Emma sat down next to Quincy. "That's something. Usually it's dad you have to worry about."

"Emma, come on, we'll help you study," Clarissa said, pulling her long, brown hair back. "What topics do you need help with?"

"I dunno, the ones with numbers?" Emma sighed.

"See," Quincy said. "This is what happens when you sleep through class and-ow!"

Emma had reached over and punched him in the shoulder.

"Mom's right, Em," Ashton said. "You need to get a B on this test or you'll fail the class. You can do this stuff if you actually _focus_. So we'll start with the Law of Cosines and then move onto the Law of Sines. Okay?"  
"Whatever," Emma mumbled. "I'm too hungry to focus, though."

"Hmm, you know, the three of us have been working for over two hours now," Clarissa said, looking at her phone. "I think it's time for a smoothie break."

"Yeah, let's hit the Groovy smoothie and pick some up," Ashton nodded, getting to her feet as Sam walked into the room.

"Hey mom?" Ashton said. "Can I have some money to go pick up smoothies with Clarissa?"

"Sure," Sam said, reaching into her pocket and handing her some bills.

"What?" Emma frowned. "How come _she _gets a break?"

"Because _she's _been studying," Sam said simply.

"We'll bring you back one," Clarissa promised. "You coming, Quince?"

"Nah, I'll stay here with Emma and get her started studying," Quincy said, putting his arm around Emma. "Can you bring me back a Strawberry Zing?"

"Sure thing," Ashton smiled.

Once her and Clarissa left, Emma turned to Quincy. "Nice thinking. Now we can have some time to do _this_."

She leaned over, about to kiss him, but he pulled away quickly.

"No, Emma," he said. "We're going to _study_. You think I want you to fail math?"

"Come on! Math is totally unimportant anyway!" Emma argued. "When am I going to use trig in real life?"

"I don't know, but you're going to use a high school diploma in real life, and to get one of those, you need trig," Quincy said firmly. "So until this test is over, no kissing."

"Please? Like you're gonna last three whole days without kissing me," Emma said knowingly.

"Well, um…" Quincy said slowly, clearly having not thought this through entirely. "Okay, how about this? For every full hour of non-stop studying we do. We can take a break and talk or watch a stupid video online or-"

"Make-out?" Emma smirked.

"Make-out, sure," Quincy nodded. "Seriously, though, Em, let's get to work. Alright, let's do these practice problems and see how you do on those."

"Fine," Emma conceded, picking up her notebook. "Let's _study_."

…..

"Wow, I'm really impressed," Ashton said later that afternoon as Emma continued to work on math problems. "You've been studying for three hours, Emma. Keep this up and you'll ace that test."

"See, studying isn't that bad, is it?" Clarissa asked.

"I want to pull my brain out of my head and stomp on it with my soccer cleats," Emma said miserably.

"That's the spirit, Em," Quincy said, squeezing her shoulder gently.

"Oh, shoot, I forgot I was supposed to get home to help my mom clean out our shoe collection," Clarissa said, getting to her feet. "We both realized we have way to many so we're giving away our old ones to make more for new ones."

"Whoa, really?" Ashton said. "When you say you're 'giving away' your old shoes, do you mean-"

"Yes, you can come take what you want," Clarissa laughed.

"Sweet!" Ashton grinned, getting to her feet. "I'll drive us over."

"Good luck studying, you guys," Clarissa said to Emma and Quincy.

"Alright, well, that's the three-hour mark," Quincy said as the other girls left the house. "You've earned yourself a break."

"Finally," Emma said, slamming her book shut.

"You're gonna be really glad you're doing all this work when you take that test," Quincy promised her, giving her a quick kiss.

"Yeah, yeah," Emma said, rolling her eyes. "As long as I don't have to repeat this math class. Mickey Rollins had to repeat Algebra last year and people laughed at him the whole year."

"I don't think people were laughing at his repeating algebra so much as they were laughing at the weird stuffed parrot he insisted on keeping perched up on his shoulder," Quincy pointed out.

"Oh yeah," Emma smiled. "I forgot about that…yeah, I guess Mickey's weirdness was more the problem. Man, I can't believe I used to have a crush on him."

"Whoa, _what_?" Quincy frowned. "You had a crush on _Mickey_?"

"In like, the fourth grade, calm down," Emma said. "He sat next to me and he always gave me gum; it was totally innocent."

"Oh," Quincy nodded.

"Kinda sad that my first crush turned into such a loser," Emma sighed. "Oh well. I guess a lot of people look back on their first crushes and wonder what in the heck they were thinking, right?"

"Um, right," Quincy agreed.

"Hey," Emma said. "Who was your first crush? I mean you know mine now."

"Oh…you-we don't have to-so let's get back to trig!" Quincy said, giving a small chuckle.

"No way, I still have three minutes of break left," Emma frowned. "Come on, just tell me who your first crush was. It's no big deal. What, you think I'm gonna hunt down the girl and beat her up or something?"

"No," Quincy said.

"Then just tell me who she is."

"It doesn't matter; it was a long time ago," Quincy told her. "Why are we talking about this?"

"Because!" Emma said. "Dude, I don't know why you just won't tell me. It was probably some dumb girl from elementary school who doesn't even remember your name anymore.  
Quincy looked over at her. "You're not going to drop this, are you?"

"Nope."

"And you promise you won't get mad or anything?"

"What's there to get mad about?" Emma laughed. "It was a _crush_."

"Okay," Quincy nodded. He took a deep breath. "It was Ashton."

Emma blinked, but said nothing.

"So…um, wow, looks like five minutes are up!" Quincy said. "How about we get back to studying and-"

"Hold on," Emma said slowly. "You're telling me that you had a crush on _Ashton_? As in my identical twin sister Ashton?"

"Emma, like you said, it was no big deal," Quincy said quickly. "It was just a crush and-"

"When did you like her?" Emma asked softly.

"Emma…"

"When were you in love with my sister?" Emma snapped.

"I wasn't in love with her!" Quincy exclaimed. "It was in the fifth grade and-"

"The fifth grade? That was practically yesterday!"

"See, this is why I never wanted you to find out," Quincy sighed.

"Oh well _excuse me _for not being all happy and giddy finding out my boyfriend for almost a year used to love my sister!"

"I didn't love her!" Quincy cried. "I just thought she was really nice and pretty and I hung out with her all the time. Besides, it's not like she ever would've liked me back."  
"Right," Emma said, grabbing her textbook and notebook. "So you just had to settle for me."

"No!" Quincy said at once. "I didn't settle for you! Emma, me liking you has nothing to do with me having a tiny little crush on Ashton six years ago!"

"Just leave me alone," Emma mumbled, heading for the stairs.

"Emma, wait!" Quincy called after her, but Emma had already run up to her room and slammed the door shut.

….

Later that evening, Emma was laying on her bed, flipping through her math book, though still thinking about what Quincy had told her.

She couldn't believe he had liked Ashton when they were younger. Was she really just supposed to believe that he had moved on from her when he still saw her every day? And she _did _look just like her…did he ever pretend to himself that she was her sister when they were together?

"Hey, I got you some shoes from Clarissa's I thought you'd like," Ashton said, walking into their room. "They're those flat ones with the cool pattern."

"Whatever," Emma snapped.

She knew Ashton had no idea what had happened, but she could still be a little mad at her, right?

Ashton frowned. "You okay? You need some help with math?"

"No," Emma sighed. "I just kind of want to be by myself…you know, so I can study."

"Oh, okay," Ashton shrugged. "I'll go down and watch T.V. Hopefully dad won't try and force me to watch the sci-fi channel with him again…"

As Ashton left, Emma sighed. _I wonder what would've happened if Ashton would've liked Quincy too…would they have gotten together instead? Would I have been jealous of them?_

Just then her door swung open again and Sam walked in.

"Emma, how many times do I have to tell you? _Study!_" Sam said.

Emma held up her math book. "What's it look like I'm doing?"

"Oh…" Sam said. "Didn't expect that. Well, keep up the good work then, kid."

"Okay," Emma mumbled.

Sam turned back around. "You alright, sweetie?"

"Yes," Emma said, though not meeting her mother's gaze.

"Emma," Sam said, walking over to the bed and sitting down. "I didn't mean to stress you out about this test earlier. I just want you do to do good. But I'm sure you'll pull through. Just don't let the pressure-"

"I'm not upset about the math test mom," Emma admitted.

"Then what's bugging you, kiddo?" Sam asked, gently stroking her hair.

"Nothing," Emma said.

"No, nothing wouldn't have you all mopey like this," Sam said. "Come on, what's up?"

Emma looked up at Sam. "I just found out that Quincy used to have a crush on Ashton."

"Really?" Sam said, surprised.

"Yeah," Emma said darkly.

"So you're worried that he only started going out with _you _because he couldn't get her," Sam said knowingly.

Emma frowned. "Okay…can you read minds?"

Sam smiled. "Did you know that your dad used have a huge crush on your Aunt Carly?"

"Seriously?" Emma exclaimed.

"Yeah, it was real pathetic," Sam nodded. "He used to follow her around and told her he loved her at least five times a day. He was convinced they'd get married one day too. I think he even had names for their kids picked out…"

"Gross," Emma cringed.

"Tell me about it," Sam said. "They even dated for like, a week once."

"Really?"

"Uh-huh, after some big taco truck mishap, but then he realized he was her bacon and they broke up," Sam explained.

"What?"

"It's a long story…"

"But-But didn't you ever feel like-like…you know?"

"Like your dad settled for me because he couldn't get my best friend?" Sam finished. "Yeah, I did. When the two of us first started going out, it bothered me a lot. I always wondered if he'd be happier with Carly if she would actually agree to date him. And it's got to be even tougher for you; Ashton's your identical twin sister."

"Exactly!" Emma said. "How did you deal with that with you and dad and Aunt Carly?"

"Well one day I had a really bad day at school," Sam said. "I had failed a test, I got detention for something stupid and my locker crockpot malfunctioned and got clam chowder all over my backpack. So I had stormed home and was sitting around, hating the world, when your dad came over. He had gone out and picked up a container of my favorite ice cream, a bouquet of roses and the complete DVD set of _Girly Cow_. He stayed with me that whole night and made me feel like a princess even though he had so many other things he could've been doing. And that's when I realized how much he really loved me. He was dating me because he actually _cared _about me, not because I was some consolation prize for Carly."

"Oh," Emma said softly.

"You just need to let yourself trust that Quincy really _does _care about you," Sam said. "Do _you _think he'd have stuck around with you for a whole year, treating you the way he does, if he didn't?"

"I guess not," Emma admitted.

"Ashton was just a crush for him," Sam told her gently. "You're something more."

….

Several hours later, when Ashton had come up to go to bed and Emma way lying in her own bed, staring at the ceiling, she heard a tiny clinking noise against her window. Kicking back her covers, she walked over to investigate.

As she pushed back her curtains, Emma looked down into the yard and saw Quincy standing underneath her window. He mouthed '_come down_' and she nodded and quietly snuck downstairs and went out into the backyard.

"What are you doing here?" she asked. "It's two in the morning!"

"I couldn't sleep knowing you were upset with me," Quincy said. "So I snuck over here to talk to you."

"You didn't have to do that," Emma said. "You could've just waited until morning."

"No I couldn't have," Quincy said. "Listen, Em. I didn't start going out with you because of that whole thing with Ashton. I started going out with you because I had feelings, real feelings, for you. I never even thought about Ashton when we started going out, I swear."

Emma gave him a small smile. "I know."

"I love _you_," Quincy said. "And only you."

Emma's eyes widened. "You-You _love_ me?"

"Well…yeah," Quincy nodded.

Emma grinned and stood on her toes, kissing him gently. "I love you too."


	484. Chapter 484

_Wipe_

"I can't believe we've been dating for six months," Freddie smiled as him and Sam sat on his couch. "Six amazing, _perfect _months."

"And I can't believe you're still using those corny lines," Sam said, though she was blushing as Freddie kissed the tip of her nose. "Hey, what are we gonna do tonight? I mean, not that I've _minded _the past hour we've spent making out, but don't couples usually do something big on their six month anniversary?"

"I was thinking we could stay in and have a nice, relaxing evening," Freddie replied. "I bough all the ingredients I need to make the best chicken Parmesan, and I spent all morning making a cake for us. That way we can spend more time doing _this_…"

He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her passionately.

"Hmm," Sam smirked when they pulled apart. "I guess we _would _get some awkward stares if we did that in public all night. But, um…you-you said your mom was working late, right?"

"Yeah, why?" Freddie nodded.

"Because she _hates _me."

"Sam, she does not hate you," Freddie told her.

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Okay, maybe she _dislikes _you a little bit. That's just because she's a little jealous of the fact that I spend so much of my time with you now. It's a normal mom thing."

"No, she just hates me," Sam said. "I can't even hold your hand around her without her calling me a skunk bag or something, she rips on me for not being 'proper' all of the time and she always sprays me with that gross sanitizing chiz and she-"

"Alright, alright," Freddie sighed. "I get it. But Sam, she's working until two in the morning at the hospital. She's not going to ruin this night for us."

"Okay," Sam smiled, lacing her arms around his neck again.

The two deepened the kiss and were soon quite oblivious to anything happening around them. So when the apartment door opened and Marissa Benson stepped in, neither of them noticed until she let out a shrill scream.

"Ah! Get off of my precious baby, you delinquent!" She ran over to Sam and Freddie and pulled Freddie away from Sam.

"Mom!" Freddie exclaimed. "What are you doing? I thought you were working until two!"

"There was a mistake in the schedule," Marissa said. "And thank goodness there was! I can't believe this hooligan talked you into turning our home into a-a-"

"Mom, _I _invited Sam over!" Freddie said.

"Here, wipe off your lips with these disinfectant wipes," Marissa said, ignoring her son's comment as she pulled a container out of her purse. She glared over at Sam. "You don't know what sort of germs and bacteria she's breeding."

"Mom!" Freddie yelled.

"I still can't see why you insist on being around someone so…_disgusting_," Marissa cringed as she furiously wiped Freddie's face. "You could have much better choices, you're such a handsome boy. Or better yet you could date nobody and spend more time with me-"

"But I choose _Sam_," Freddie said firmly, looking over at his girlfriend who was staring down at her lap. "Because I love her and-"

"But she's not good enough for you!" Marissa cried. "She's just ruining you and making you-"

But before she could finish, Sam jumped off the couch and darted out the door.

"Sam!" Freddie yelled, quickly getting to his feet. He ducked his mom's wipes and ran after her.

She was leaning against Carly's door, and her eyes looked red, as though she was holding back tears.

"Baby, I'm so sorry," Freddie said. "I swear, I didn't think she'd be back."

"I _told _you she hated me!" Sam said shakily.

"Look, let's just forget about her," Freddie said. "We'll go out to dinner and-"

"Freddie!" they heard Marissa yelling from inside the apartment. "Get back in here so I can finish disinfecting you from all the filth that gutter girl got all over you!"

Sam looked down at her feet. "Freddie, I can't take this anymore."'

"I'll talk to her," Freddie said.

"It won't make a difference!" Sam said. "She's never going to like me and she's never going to be okay with you dating me! She's never going to stop this and I don't want to deal with it anymore; I can't stand that my boyfriend's mom has such a huge problem with me that she thinks I'm destroying her son!"

"Sam…" Freddie said softly. "What-What are you-"

"I'm sorry, but…maybe we should just give her what she wants," Sam said, a tear falling down her cheek. "She'll finally leave you alone and-and it will be the best for everyone."

"No," Freddie said, not believing what he was hearing. "Sam, I don't want us to break up over my mom's behavior!"

"If we stay together, things are just going to get really bad between you guys," Sam mumbled.

"But Sam!" Freddie said, feeling as though he had just been punched in the stomach. "I love you!"

"I love you too," Sam whispered, not meeting his gaze. "But…we just aren't going to work out with your mom so against us."

"But-But-" Freddie said weakly. But Sam had turned around and went into the Shay's apartment, leaving him all alone in the hallway.

_Did we just break up_? Freddie thought, a cold wave of grief rushing through his body.

He didn't want to not have Sam in his life; he was in love with her!

His legs feeling numb, Freddie slowly turned and walked back into his own apartment.

"I have a tick bath all ready for you," Marissa said sternly. "While you're in there I'm going to have to steam the couch and-"

"I'm not taking a tick bath!" Freddie yelled, feeling angrier than he could ever remember.

Marissa's eyes widened in shock.

"Do you have any idea what you just did?" he continued, his face turning red. "You messed up the single greatest thing in my life!"

"Freddie!" Marissa gasped. "What are you-"

"Sam just broke up with me because of you!" Freddie cried. "Because of the way you treated her! Because of the way you always make her feel terrible about herself when she doesn't even do anything to you! I _love _her, and you still can't respect her enough to even say one nice thing about her! You don't even care about what she means to _me_, your _son_!"

"Freddie, I-"

"I'm never going to forgive you for this," Freddie said coldly. "Ever."

And with that he stormed into his room, slamming the door hard behind him.

….

The next day, Sam woke up on the Shay's couch feeling as though a huge part of her was missing. She still couldn't believe she had broken up with Freddie; it was the hardest thing she had ever done. But she knew if they stayed together, Mrs. Benson wouldn't give either of them a moment's peace until the ended it.

So she had.

"Hey," she heard Carly said gently from the kitchen, coming over with a large plate of eggs and bacon. "You feeling any better?"

Sam had of course told Carly everything, and Carly had been doing her duty of a best friend during this dilemma most magnificently.

"Not really," Sam admitted, taking the plate but not eating.

"Sam, I'm sure you and Freddie will work things out," Carly said. "I mean he's not going to live with his mom forever. Next year when he move out for college maybe things will be easier for you guys."

"Carly, his mom is never going to like me," Sam sighed. "The woman's never even going to be able to _tolerate _me. If I stay with Freddie it's only going to wreck things between him and his mom and I don't want him to do that."

"But he loves you," Carly said.

"I love him too," Sam said softly. "And that's why I broke up with him."

….

Later that afternoon, Sam, Carly and Spencer were sitting out in the Shay's living room, watching T.V.

"Okay, this movie is probably the most terrifying thing I've seen in my whole life," Spencer said, flinching as a particularly scary scene flashed on the screen.

"Yeah," Sam said, lacking her usual enthusiasm for gory films. Carly gave her a sympathetic smile; she knew she was still hung up over the prior day's events.

"Why don't I got make us more popcorn?" Carly suggested. "And then we can-"

But just then there was a knock at the door and a second later Mrs. Benson herself stepped into the apartment.

"Hello," she said curtly to the three on the couch.

"Um…what-what are you doing here, Mrs. Benson?" Spencer asked, confused, since he had heard all about what happened the day before.

"Yeah, Freddie's not here," Carly said somewhat defensively.

"I would like," Marissa began, looking very strained. "I would like to…I would like to talk to…_her_."

She pointed at Sam.

"Me?" Sam frowned.

"Y-Yes," Marissa managed through her clenched teeth.

"Um…Sam?" Carly whispered to her best friend. "Are you okay with this?"

"Er, I-I guess," Sam said reluctantly.

"Well…alright," Carly said, getting to her feet. "Come on, Spence, let's go upstairs."

"But we're gonna miss the good stuff!" Spencer whined.

"Let's go," Carly said, rolling her eyes as she grabbed her brother's arm and dragged him up the steps.

Once they had left, Sam looked up at Mrs. Benson, not knowing what to expect.

"So," Marissa began, somewhat awkwardly. "You and my Freddie have…_decoupled_?"

"Um, well, yeah," Sam nodded. "Isn't that what you wanted for him?"

"Yes," Marissa said. "Or….I _did_. Until I saw what it did to him."

"Is he okay?" Sam asked, concerned.

"He's been moping in his room ever since you left yesterday," Marissa sighed. "He wouldn't even come out for my special tofu casserole!"

"Yeah, shocker," Sam mumbled under her breath."

"He's been depressed all day and won't do anything except look through old photographs of the two of you," Marissa continued, shaking her head. "I've tried everything! I've unlocked all the T.V. channels, even that _horrible _nature channel, I've offered to extend his bedtime and I even promised to let him start picking out his own underwear, but nothing's working! He only wants…" she let out a heavy sigh. "He only wants _you_."

Sam said nothing.

"As much as I want to believe that Freddie can be happy staying with me for the rest of his life, I realize now that-that he's the happiest when he's around you," Marissa said. "And I suppose that _is _what every mother wants for her son…even if it does kill her. So, for the sake of Freddie, I am, well…_sorry _for the things I've said to you in the past that may have been perceived in a less-than-positive way."

_Ha, it looked like she just had to swallow live worms_, Sam thought gleefully to herself.

"So I'm asking you now to _please _go and work things out with Freddie," Marissa said. "If you're the girl he says makes him feel happy, then…then I would…_like _for you two to be together."

Sam looked at her. "So you're not going to try and get him to break up with me anymore?"

"No, I suppose there's no use in that," Marissa sighed.

"And you're not going to spray that sanitizing chiz on me when I'm over at your place anymore?"

"N-No…"

"And you won't call me a horrible, delinquent gutter girl anymore?"

"No, I won't do any of that stuff anymore," Marissa groaned. "I'm sorry for all that. Just-Just go over and fix my Freddie! _Please_?"

Sam nodded. "Alright, I'll go. For Freddie."

"Thank you," Marissa said, still looking as though she had swallowed something sour.

Sam headed across the hall, still a little shocked at what had just happened. That had to have been really hard for Mrs. Benson, and while she did appreciate the gesture, she knew there was never any way the two of them would be close. At least for now, anyway. But she was concerned about Freddie. How bad was he to have his mother begging her to get back together with him?

Sam stepped into the apartment and went straight back to Freddie's room, knocking softly before pushing the door open.

Freddie was laying on his bed, still in his pajamas, eating a pint of ice cream as he scrolled through his Pearpad, looking through all of his and Sam's pictures. He didn't even look up when Sam cam in.

"Jeez, glad to see I'm the better looking half of this break-up," Sam said, causing his head to snap up.

"Sam!" he said, surprised. "What-What are you doing here."

"Your mom was right, you do look pathetic," Sam said, sitting down next to him on the bed.

"My mom?" Freddie frowned. "What were you doing talking to her?"  
"She came over and found me at Carly's," Sam explained. "She-She wanted to talk to me."

"Aw man, did she say _more _awful things to you?" Freddie moaned. "Sam, I'm so sorry. I-I can't even blame you for yesterday; you don't deserve to be treated that way by her and I swear, when she gets home, I'm-"

"She didn't say anything bad to me," Sam told him. "She actually…she apologized to me."

"Apologized?" Freddie repeated. "Are you-Are you _serious_?"

"I still have goose bumps from it," Sam nodded. "She-She told me she was sorry for how she's been treating me since we've started going out and that she wanted us to get back together. Because she said I made you happier than she's ever seen you."

"She said that?"

"Yeah," Sam said softly. "And she said she'd never treat me that way again."

"Unbelievable," Freddie said.

"I mean you _are _looking pretty lousy without me, nub," Sam smirked. "Ice cream, pajamas and pictures of us? Have a _little_ pride."

"I missed you," Freddie said simply. "I told you before, I love you."

"Yeah," Sam smiled, scooting closer to him. "I love you too. I mean ever though we've been broken up for less than twenty-four hours, I've kind of been going out of my mind missing you also."

"So-So with my mom promising to be, well, _decent_, towards you…does that mean that we're-are we-"

Sam leaned forward and kissed him. "That answer your question?"

"Oh thank God," Freddie said, wrapping his arms around her. "Because I think I was this close to going insane without you."

"Easy there, Fredweirdo," Sam laughed, hugging him back.

"Sorry," Freddie said, releasing her.

"Hey, you know," Sam said thoughtfully. "We never did get to celebrate our anniversary last night…"

"Yeah, you're right," Freddie said. "Us temporarily breaking up kind of put a damper in everything."

"Six months is a pretty important anniversary," Sam continued. "It would be a shame to waste it…"

"You wanna go out now and make up for last night's disaster?" Freddie grinned.

"Let's roll, baby," Sam said cheerfully, giving him another kiss before getting to her feet.


	485. Chapter 485

_Safe_

"Sam, relax, everything is _fine _here," Freddie said into his phone as he wiped up a huge puddle on the kitchen floor. "I _can _take care of our kids for one week by myself."

"Well how are they?" Sam asked on the other line. "Are Emma and Ashton fighting a lot? Is Tyler behaving himself? Is Jason helping you out with everything?"

"Oh yeah, the kids are all great," Freddie said. "They miss you, obviously, but they're perfectly all right. So you and Carly having fun at that writers convention your boss made you go to?"

"Tons," Sam said dryly. "I get to spend this whole week in meetings about all sorts of boring chiz that doesn't even apply to my job!"

"Think of it as a vacation," Freddie said. "Tell me it doesn't feel nice to have some time to yourself for once?"

"Yeah, it has been peaceful," Sam admitted. "But seriously, baby, let me know if the kids get to be too much and I'll see if I can weasel out of this and come home."

"Sam, stop worrying," Freddie said firmly. "I'm handling everything. Just focus on the convention and-"

"Dad!" nine-year old Tyler suddenly bust in crying, holding his bleeding his arm. "Dad, I fell off my bike!"

"What was that?" Sam asked.

"Um, just the T.V.!" Freddie said quickly. "Gotta go, Sam. Love you!"

He hung up his phone and rushed over to his son. "Ty, what happened?"

"I just told you!" Tyler cried. "I fell off my bike!"

"Okay, okay, let's get you cleaned up," Freddie said, lifting Tyler up and setting him on the counter. "Let's see…it's not too bad. We just need some boo-boo spray and a couple bandages and you'll be good as new."

"I hate the boo-boo spray," Tyler moaned.

"Hey, at least this stuff is the normal kind," Freddie pointed out, grabbing the bottle from the cabinet above the sink and spraying a bit on Tyler's wound. "Your grandma used to buy the industrial strength kind and use it on me if I even got a paper cut. See, that didn't hurt too much, did it?"

"No," Tyler sniffed as Freddie covered his cut with a bandage.

"There, you're all set," Freddie said. "Just be more careful next time."

"Mom always gives me ice cream when I get hurt," Tyler said shakily.

Freddie raised an eyebrow. "Does she now?"

"Um…yeah," Tyler nodded.

Freddie sighed. "Well alright. Let me get you some."

He headed over to the freezer and pulled out the ice cream container just as he heard the front door slam shut.

"You're unbelievable, Emma!" Ashton yelled, storming into the kitchen.

"I didn't even do anything!" Emma said.

"Yes you did! You ruined my whole life, that's what you did!"

"Girls, no fighting!" Freddie said firmly as his thirteen-year old daughters glared at each other. "Now, what's going on?"

"Nothing!" Emma said. "Ashton just blew up at me for no reason!"  
"I did not!" Ashton snapped. "At school, in the middle of lunch, I look over at Emma and I find out her and I are wearing the same _earrings_!"

"They're little gold balls!" Emma said. "Almost all the girls at school have them!"

"But you did it just to make me look like some dorky twin who has to do everything her sister does!" Ashton exclaimed. "My life is over! I hope you're happy!"

"I wore earrings!" Emma defended. "I didn't break your leg!"

"Ash," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "I'm sure Emma didn't mean to ruin your life when she chose her earrings today."

"Sure, take _her _side!" Ashton said, crossing her arms. "You always do! You love Emma more than me!"

"What? No I don't!" Freddie said. "I'm just saying that maybe you're overreacting a little bit about the-"

"Yeah, sure, I'm _always _the one who overreacts and Emma is always the innocent one, isn't she?" Ashton interrupted angrily.

"That's not what I'm saying at all!" Freddie frowned. "Ashton, I was just-"

"Well I'm going up to my room to change my earrings and to get away from all you people who just want to annoy me and make me miserable!"

"Um, what's wrong with her?" Freddie asked as Ashton stomped upstairs.

"I dunno, but do you _see _why I need my own room?" Emma said. "She's crazy."

"Alright, enough Emma," Freddie said. "Go start your homework. Jason should be back any minute now with the milk and then I can start making dinner. You're going to love this new potato recipe I found. It's made with this fancy type of onions and-"

"Hey, when's dinner? I'm starving," Jason said, coming in through the kitchen door. "Oh, are we having ice cream?"

"Jason, where's the milk I asked you to get?" Freddie frowned.

"Oh…about that," Jason said. "See, I was about to go get it. Then I remembered there was this sale at the Pear store, and I really needed a new case for my laptop so I figured I should be responsible with my time and go get the laptop case."

"Jason!" Freddie sighed. "I needed that milk to make dinner. Now we're just gonna have to order pizza. Sorry guys, I know you were all looking forward to trying my new recipe."

"Yeah…too bad," Emma said.

…

A few hours later, when Freddie returned with the pizza, he walked back into the kitchen with the boxes, where he saw Ashton sitting at the table, scowling as she did her homework.

"Ash, can you get the plates, please?" Freddie asked, setting the pizza boxes down. "And then call your brothers and sister and tell them the food is here?"

"God! Why do I always have to do everything?" Ashton exclaimed, closing her book shut.

"I asked you to do two little things," Freddie frowned.

"Why? Because you just _assume_ I have nothing better to do?"

"No…because you were the only one in the room," Freddie said, confused.

"Well now _you're _the only one in the room!" Ashton snapped as she gathered het things and stormed back upstairs.

"Ashton!" Freddie called after her. "Ashton! Get back here and-"

He heard her door slam loudly.

"Okay! Go to your room!" he said lamely.

"Sweet, pizza's here," Emma said as her and her brothers came into the kitchen, no doubt having smelled their favorite Meat Slam pie.

"Emma, is anything bothering Ashton?" Freddie asked as the kids began to dig in.

"I dunno," Emma shrugged simply. "I've been staying out of her way. She's scary when she's in these moods."

"Nothing's going on at school?" Freddie continued. "No problems with teachers or…_boys_?"

"Dad, you force me to live with her; I try to avoid her as much as possible at school," Emma told him. "If you're so concerned, _you _talk to her."

"No," Freddie mumbled. "She's a little…"

"Scary?" Jason finished.

"Hey, I've been married to your mom for eighteen years; I can deal with scary!" Freddie defended. "But not coming from my sweet baby girl…Something must really be bugging her."

"Or maybe she's just lost it," Emma said simply. "Hey, if you and mom move her to a mental hospital, I'll finally have my own room!"  
"Ashton's going to a mental hospital?" Tyler asked.

"No!" Freddie said firmly.

"Wasn't mom in a mental hospital once?" Jason asked.

"Well, yes," Freddie nodded. "But only because-"

"Mommy's crazy?" Tyler gasped.

"No! You're mom is not crazy!" Freddie said. "And neither is Ashton! Nobody is going to a mental hospital! Now everybody eat your pizza!"

…..

"Ash?" Freddie said, slowly stepping into the girls' bedroom later that night with a plate of pizza. "Honey, you didn't eat dinner."

"I'm not hungry," Ashton mumbled from her bed, where she was curled up.

"You sure? I ordered you a special veggie pizza," Freddie said. "No one else in this house is going to touch it so you better eat up before it goes bad."

"I'm not hungry, okay?" Ashton snapped.

"Sweetheart," Freddie sighed, sitting down on the foot of her bed. "What's going on? Why have you been in such a bad mood all day?"

"I haven't been in a bad mood!"

"Okay!" Freddie said quickly. "Well is there anything bothering you? Anything you want to talk to me about?"

"With you?" Ashton frowned. "_God_ no."

"Ashton, I'm your dad," Freddie said. "You can talk to me about anything, you know that."

"Ugh! Can you just leave?" Ashton moaned.

"Ashton, I just-"

"Dad! I don't want to talk to you!" Ashton exclaimed. "Jeez, can't you just get that?"

Freddie sighed. _So she looks like Sam __**and **__gets her stubbornness?_

"Fine," Freddie conceded. "But remember, Ashton, my door is always open if you want to talk and-"

"I don't."

"Well if you ever need anything-"

"_Goodbye_ dad."

Freddie shook his head as he stepped out of the room, closing the door behind him. "Teenagers suck."

….

"Jason!" Freddie yelled the next morning as he scrambled to get all the kids lunches packed. "You remember you have to pick Emma up from track practice after school, right?"

"Why do I have to chauffer my little sister around?" Jason moaned.

"Because I said so," Freddie said, piling eggs onto Tyler's plate. "I have to go to Tyler's parent-teacher conference after school."

"Dad, did you sign my permission slip for the eight-grade field trip yet?" Emma asked.

"No, give me it," Freddie said. "And where's Ashton? I might as well sign hers now too."

"She's still in bed," Emma replied.

"What?" Freddie cried. "We're leaving in five minutes!"

"She said she didn't feel well," Emma replied.

"She did?" Freddie frowned. "Is she sick?"

"I dunno," Emma shrugged. "She just told me she didn't want to go to school today."

"Alright, let me go talk to her," Freddie sighed. "You all eat your breakfast and get ready to go."

He headed upstairs to the twins' room and poked his head in.

"Ashton?" he said. "Emma said you weren't feeling well."

"I'm not," Ashton moaned from her bed, turning over onto her side.

"Well what's wrong?" Freddie asked, feeling her forehead. "You don't have a fever."

"I just feel…bad," Ashton said weakly. "Can I please stay home from school?"

"But sweetie, that would ruin your perfect attendance," Freddie pointed out. "I thought you were excited to try and get that award this year."

"I don't care about it anymore," Ashton mumbled. "I just want to stay in bed all day."

"Do you want me to take you to the doctor?"

"No!" Ashton said at once. "I just want to sleep. Please daddy?"

Freddie thought for a moment; Emma was the one who'd be most likely to fake sick to get out of school. And Ashton _had _been acting odd yesterday, maybe this was why.

"Okay," Freddie agreed. "You can stay home. I'm going to take the others to school and then I'll be right back. Call if you need anything."

"Okay," Ashton groaned, closing her eyes once again.

Once Freddie had returned from taking everybody to school, he went back upstairs to check on Ashton.

As he started down the hallway towards her room, though, he head soft whimpering sounds coming from inside.

"Ashton?" Freddie said, concerned as he stepped into the room and spotted his daughter crunched over in her bed. "Are you okay? What's the matter?"

"Nothing!" Ashton sniffed.

"Honey, you're _crying_," Freddie said gently. "Please tell me what's going on, I want to help you."

"No," Ashton mumbled. "It's-It's embarrassing."

"I'm sure it's not," Freddie said soothingly.

"Yes it is!"

"Ashton, you don't need to worry about anything being embarrassing," Freddie assured her. "I'm you dad. It's safe to tell me anything at all."

Ashton didn't reply.

"Is something going on at school?" Freddie tried. "Between you and Emma? Did you guys-"

"No, it's-it's nothing like that," Ashton said quietly, her face turning bright red.

"Well then what is it?" Freddie asked. "Because I need to know so I can help you and make sure you-"

Ashton muttered something under her breath.

"Er, can you say that again?" Freddie said. "I didn't quite catch it."

Ashton sighed and, avoiding her father's eyes, said very softly. "I started my period."

Freddie's eyes widened. He had_ not _been expecting _that_.

"Oh…" Freddie said lamely as Ashton's face turned ever redder, along with his own. "Well, um…okay, that-that makes sense, I guess."

"I wish mom was back," Ashton said, looking down.

"Yeah, I-I know you do," Freddie nodded. "I'm sure you'd much rather have her handling this. But hey, I can help you still. I, um, I'm not quite as good as your mother, but I took a health class in high school…you-you have, er, _stuff_, right?"

"I've sort of been using mom's stuff," Ashton told him. "But she's running out."

"Okay, well, I'll go buy you some more," Freddie said quickly, scrambling to his feet. "I can do that. And I suppose you must have a bunch of questions too. I mean your body is going through this whole thing and-"

"Yes, but I'm waiting for _mom _to get back for those," Ashton said firmly.

"Yeah, good call," Freddie agreed.

….

Freddie returned back to the house an hour later and headed back into the girls' room.

"Alright," Freddie said, handing Ashton a bag. "I picked you up a few things. I, well, I didn't know what sort of _stuff _to buy you, or what the differences were between everything, but the lady at the store told me to get you that kind, so I just sort of trusted her."

"Okay," Ashton nodded, still not making eye contact with her father.

"And, um, I got you some medicine that's supposed to help with cramps," Freddie continued. "And I got you some of the fancy chocolates your mom says makes her feel better."

"Oh," Ashton said. "That was nice…"

"You need anything else, honey?" Freddie asked, kissing the top of her head.

"No," Ashton replied quietly.

"Alright, well if you do…I'm right downstairs," Freddie told her.

"Okay," Ashton said.

Freddie made to leave the room.

"Thank you, daddy," Ashton said right before he left.

Freddie turned around and smiled. "Your welcome, Ash."

He went back down the stairs and collapsed onto the couch.

_You just had to pick this week to go off to a writer's convention, didn't you, Sam? _he thought to himself.


	486. Chapter 486

_Routine_

"Hey, you know what I've always wondered?" Carly said to Sam as the two of them lounged lazily on the Shay's couch, watching T.V. "Why do these celebrities agree to be dunked underwater for insane amounts of time? I mean, do they not care that they could drown?"

"Carls, these are all _washed up_ celebrities," Sam explained. "They're just happy to be back on television. They're probably all sick of their lame lives and routines and will do anything to get back in the spotlight."

"I guess," Carly nodded. "But still, it seems a little drastic to-"

"Well! My life's over!" Freddie announced, bursting into the apartment.

"Hello to you too," Carly said.

"Why's your life over, baby?" Sam asked.

"Because MIT started sending out acceptance emails three days ago and I still haven't heard anything," Freddie sighed, sitting down next to her as she put an arm around him. "Which means I probably didn't get in at all."

"Dude, that's ridiculous," Sam said supportively. "Of course you got in! You're crazy smart, you do all the tech stuff on iCarly, you got super high SAT scores-"

"Then why haven't they emailed me yet?" Freddie moaned.

"Maybe they're still sending out acceptances," Carly reasoned.

"But everybody else has heard back," Freddie sighed. "I really don't think I got in, you guys. Think about it; I would've heard by now. It makes no sense for them to send out everybody else's acceptance letters and just wait to send out mine."

"Maybe something happened with their system and there was some sort of delay," Sam suggested.

"Sam, this is MIT," Freddie scoffed. "They don't have tech errors!"

"Look, Freddie, I know you're bummed, and that's totally understandable," Carly said. "But you can't get yourself down like this. You _may _still get into the school. And if not, then you'll come to Washington State with Sam and me."

"Yeah, that wouldn't be so bad, would it?" Sam pointed out.

Freddie shrugged. "No, I guess not." He looked over at Sam. "I mean I'd be with you."

"See? Everything will work out," Carly promised him.

"Actually…I've been thinking about going to MIT next year that I really haven't given Washington State that much thought," Freddie said. "Being there with you guys would be great. Sam and I wouldn't have to deal with a long distance relationship, we could still keep up iCarly on a less-frequent schedule, I could come home more often…well, that isn't exactly a big plus. But hey, my mom would stop freaking out about how I'm leaving her!"

"See, even if you don't get into MIT, you're still going to be fine," Sam smiled, giving him a quick kiss. "Hey, if we all go there, maybe we can even get an apartment one year when we're done with dorms!"

"Oh yeah!" Carly nodded. "That would be fun! Of course we'd have to establish some _rules_…I don't want to be walking in on anything more than I'm already forced to when you two have your _own_ homes."

"Right," Freddie chuckled. "And with the three of us renting an apartment it wouldn't be too expensive!"

"We could get a dog!" Sam exclaimed. "And the two of you could take turns walking him!"

"The _three_ of us," Freddie corrected.

"Hey, since Washington State isn't too far, I bet Spencer wouldn't mind driving us up some cool sculptures," Carly added. "So we can spice the place up."

"And my cousin can get us furniture for practically nothing, so long as we don't ask questions," Sam nodded.

"You know, maybe me not getting into MIT was for the best," Freddie said thoughtfully.

…

The next day Freddie way lying in bed, fooling around with his laptop, when Sam came in.

"Hey," she smiled.

"Hey," Freddie replied, grinning as she sat down next to him. He kissed her and pulled her closer to him. "I thought you were hanging out with your mom today."

"I was, but after we went shopping for a little bit, she got a call from some zoo keeper she's been interested in and I told her we'd hang later," Sam shrugged. "So I thought I'd come over here."

"Great," Freddie said. "I was just thinking about you, actually. You know how we were talking about the three of us at Washington State yesterday?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded.  
"Well I realized that with us going to the same college, it's really going to strengthen our relationship," Freddie said. "So I was _thinking_…why don't we get a head start on that?"

"What do you mean?" Sam asked.

"I mean after graduation, why don't we take a weekend and go on a little road trip to check everything out," Freddie aid. "We could get to know the campus, find the best spots to eat, look at some of the classrooms…plus it would be our first trip together."

"Wow…" Sam said. "That would be amazing."

"I even found some places nearby we could stay Freddie said, opening his laptop back up. "There's this one place that-whoa."

"What is it?" Sam asked.

"I-I just got an email," Freddie said slowly. "From MIT…."

"Seriously?" Sam said. "Well what are you waiting for? Open it up!"

"It's probably the rejection email they finally got around to sending me," Freddie shrugged. "I mean Gibby got _his _this morning."

"Wait, Gibby applied to MIT?" Sam frowned.

"He thought it stood for Massachusetts Institute of Tea," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "I should just delete this."

"Well…you should still read it," Sam told him. "Maybe they told you to reapply some other time."

"I doubt it," Freddie sighed, opening the email anyway. "It's probably just-oh my God. Sam, I-I-I got in."

"What?" Sam exclaimed. "You got in? Oh my God! Baby, that's _fantastic_!"

She threw her arms around him and kissed him. "I'm so proud of you!"

"There was some error sending out acceptance letters," Freddie said. "Apparently only half of them got sent out on time."

"See, I told you," Sam smirked. "Now you can go to your dream school! You-You're going too MIT…"

As she said those words, it really seemed to hit her. Freddie would be leaving her now.

Freddie seemed to be having the same thoughts. "I could still decline them," he said.

"Why would you do that?" Sam frowned. "You've been wanting to go to MIT since you were ten."

"But Sam," he said. "I'd-I'd be so far from you. And we were just saying how perfect it would be if I went to Washington State with you and Carly. We'd get to spend all this time together and-"

"You can't give up MIT," Sam said softly.

"But I don't want to give you up either."  
Sam smiled up at him. "You're not giving me up just because you want to do something so important to you. Baby, go to MIT. I'll be here still. We'll visit and call and everything."

"But it won't be the same," Freddie sighed.

"No," Sam agreed. "But we'll make it work…And hey, now we have a new reason to take that road trip; it can be one of ways we make this summer incredible before we go off in different directions. We can go up to Washington State and then we can go to MIT and look around too. It will be fun! Hey, I heard there was a great French fry place in Massachusetts that we could go to!"

"Sam, you're really okay with me going to MIT?" Freddie said.

Sam nodded. "You need to go there; it's filled with nerds just like you."

"I bet none of _them _are lucky enough to have a girlfriend like you," Freddie beamed.

"No, probably not," Sam agreed. "Hey, we should go celebrate! I'll take you out to Petrozini's! Oh wait, I don't have money…"

"I'll pay," Freddie laughed. "Come on. If I'm going to MIT, we're going to make the most of the time we have left together."

…..

Later that evening, after her and Freddie had gone out to dinner, Sam let herself into Carly's apartment, where Carly was working on some homework.

"Hey," Carly said brightly. "Where have you been all day?"

"Freddie got into MIT," Sam said, flopping down next to her.

"No way!" Carly gasped. "That's great!"

"Yeah, he's pretty excited," Sam said, giving a small smile. "He's already talking about which classes he's going to take and everything."

"See, we told him he had nothing to worry about," Carly said. "He was just-hey, you okay?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded, sighing heavily. "It's just…It's really starting to sink in, you know, how far away Washington State and MIT are."

"Oh Sam," Carly said softly. "I'm sorry."

"I want him to go," Sam said firmly. "But…I'm gonna miss him."

"Of course you are, he'll miss you too," Carly said. "But he really wants this-"

"Yeah, I know," Sam said. "I just hope he knows he better come and visit. A lot."


	487. Chapter 487

_Still_

"Hey Spencer," Freddie said, letting himself into the man's apartment. "Carly and Sam here? They said we were hanging out here today."

"Yeah, they're upstairs," Spencer replied, looking up from his sculpture. "Hey, have I ever mentioned how great it is that you three still never leave and eat all my food even though you've all moved out and have your own places now?"

"Once or twice," Freddie nodded.

"What are you guys even doing here today?" Spencer asked.

"Carly's helping me and Sam figure out what color we want to paint our kitchen," Freddie said. "Sam wants red but I'm more of a blue guy…"

"Oh that's right, you guys moved in together," Spencer cringed. "Gross."

"It's not gross," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "Sam and I love each other so we decided to take the next step and start living together so that we could-"

"Stop! I don't want to hear about your guys' love life!" Spencer cried, covering his ears.

"Whatever," Freddie chuckled. "I'm gonna go up with the girls. I'll see you later, good luck with that bear sculpture."  
"It's a cow!" Spencer yelled indignantly.

Freddie headed up to the old iCarly studio, where the three still liked to gather, even though they were now in their early twenties.

The door was open, and as Freddie reached the top of the stairs, he could hear Sam and Carly's voices.

"I don't know how to tell him," he heard Sam say anxiously. "This is so big and unexpected…I don't know if he's ready for it. Heck, I don't know if I'm ready for it."

"Well Sam, you and Freddie will have to discuss this at some point," Carly said.

Freddie stopped in his tracks, listening intently. What was going on?  
"I know," Sam moaned. "But I'm just worried he-he won't react well. I mean this is huge news that I'll be throwing at him. It will change out lives."

"But Sam, it's-"

"What if he's not okay with it?" Sam said, slightly panicked. "What if-What if he's worried about the money? Or the space situation! Our apartment's sort of small; it's only big enough for the two of us."

_What in the world is she talking about? _Freddie frowned. _What would I not be okay with?_

"Or what if he's worried about what it will do to my body?" Sam continued. "I mean it's gonna be going through all these changes if I-."

"Sam, eventually Freddie _will _notice," Carly said. "Within a couple weeks it's really going to be really hard to hide."

_I'm lost_, Freddie said to himself. _What would involve an issue with money and the size of our apartment and Sam's body going through __**changes**__? And what did Carly mean that it would be hard tohide in a couple weeks? I mean it almost sounds like she's…oh-oh! Oh my God, she's not-No!_

"I can't believe I wasn't more careful," Sam sighed sadly. "Who knew one little mistake could make such a difference…"

_She is! _Freddie thought, his eyes growing wide. _There's no other explanation! Sam is…she's pregnant!_

It made sense. Sam was talking about money struggles and not having enough space in their apartment, and that would definitely apply to a baby. And of course her body _would_ be changing…

_Oh man…I-I can't believe-I'm going to be-Sam's __**pregnant**__?_

Freddie quickly turned around and ran back downstairs. He couldn't sit around and think about paint colors now. Not when he had just found out he was going to be a father…

"Hey, where are you going?" Spencer asked as Freddie returned to the living room, starting towards the door. "I thought you were picking a kitchen color."

"I can't focus on kitchens or colors or anything right now!" Freddie exclaimed. "My _life _is about to be turned upside down!"

"You mean like in that one movie where the actors found this switch that reversed the flow of gravity and-"

"No!" Freddie cried. "This is way more serious than a switch! It's like-like-I don't even know!"

And with that he stormed out of the apartment, leaving a very confused Spencer behind.

….

"I'm telling you, Carly, my life is over now," Sam moaned up in the studio, sinking into one of the beanbag chairs.

"Sam," Carly sighed. "Not that I'm not willing to be the supportive friend through this whole thing, but don't you think you're overreacting?"

"Overreacting?" Sam repeated. "Carly! This is _huge_!"

"It's Fat Cakes," Carly said simply.

"Eight _thousand _Fat Cakes," Sam moaned. "I can't believe you let me enter that online auction and use the money Freddie had saved to paint the kitchen!"

"Me?" Carly exclaimed. "I didn't know what you did until you already won the auction!"

"How am I going to get this money back?" Sam asked heavily. "And where am I even going to put all them? Can't I just store them at your place so Freddie won't notice them?"

"Sam, I can't have eight thousand Fat Cakes in my one bedroom apartment," Carly said. "Look, the shipment is being delivered in two weeks. That gives you two weeks to talk to Freddie about this. Just explain that you made a mistake and that you're sorry."

"He's gonna be all mad," Sam said. "I can't let him find out!"

"Well then eat them all before he finds out," Carly said, rolling her eyes. "Sure, it's eight thousand Fat Cakes, but you can finish that in, what, a couple days?"

"I told you, I can't eat them either!" Sam exclaimed. "If I could there'd be no problem here! But these aren't even normal Fat Cakes, they're the low-fat Fat Cakes! You know what low-fat does to my body. I get hives and rashes and my face puffs up like a balloon!"

"Well then you _have _to tell Freddie that you used the kitchen money and your apartment is going to be filled with Fat Cakes soon," Carly said firmly. "When he comes up here to look at paint samples, you just need to be honest with him. Hey, where _is _he anyway. I thought he was supposed to be here twenty minutes ago."

"Yeah, so did I," Sam nodded. "Oh well…if he doesn't come here then I guess I don't have to talk to him about this."

"Oh no, you're not getting out of it that easily," Carly said. "You _live _with him. You can tell him later tonight."  
"But can't I just-"

"Nope."

"What if I-"

"Uh-uh."

"How about I-"

"Absolutely not."

"Fine!" Sam conceded. "I'll talk to him! Jeez!"

…

That afternoon, Freddie paced anxiously back and forth in the small living room of his and Sam's apartment.

"I can't believe she's pregnant," Freddie mumbled. "What do we do? I-We're only twenty-two! We graduated from college only three months ago, we're still paying back loans, we both work weird hours at our jobs, our apartment only has one bedroom…"

He wondered how long Sam had known about this, and why she hadn't told him yet, when she clearly had talked to Carly about it.

"Aw man, she must be so scared," Freddie sighed. "And here I am freaking out when I'm not the one who's going to have to go through this pregnancy. Maybe this is why she hasn't told me yet…because she was afraid of me reacting exactly like this; only thinking about the negatives. I mean sure, I-I guess this baby wasn't exactly anything we _planned_, but it's happening and there's nothing we can do to change that. Maybe-Maybe it's not as bad as I think. If we start saving everything we make from work, we should be set for a little while. And-And I _am _close to that promotion at work thanks to my new app updating service. And we _did _want kids at some point. Sure, I planned on that being after we were married for a few years, but-but this could work too. And it's _our _baby…"

As he said those words, a smile crept onto his face. "It's mine and Sam's baby…we're going to be parents together. What could be better than that?

….

That night, Sam returned home to the apartment, greeted by the smell of her favorite meal cooking; ham.

"Hey," Sam said, walking into the kitchen where Freddie was busy cooking. "You made dinner?"

"Yup!" Freddie said, turning away from the pot he had been stirring and hurrying over to her. He wrapped his arms around and kissed her passionately. "God, you're beautiful," he said breathlessly when they pulled apart. "You really _are _practically glowing."

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Um…thank you?"

"The food will be done in a few minutes," Freddie told her. "But here, while we wait, I got you something."

"What?" Sam asked as Freddie pulled out a large paper bag.

"I found this at the mall," Freddie said, pulling out a stuffed bear. "I thought it seemed pretty cute."

"Er, yeah, it is I guess," Sam nodded. "But why did you buy me a teddy bear?"

"I figured it would be nice to have in a few months," Freddie smiled, kissing her again.

"Why?" Sam frowned, confused.

"Well…because," Freddie said. He took a deep breath. "Look, baby, I know this must be scary for you. It-It was hard for me to process too, at first, but I really think we'll be okay."  
"Um…huh?"

"I know we didn't plan for this, but it happened, and there must be a reason for that, right?" Freddie said. "We-We can start looking for a bigger place, we'll make a few budget cuts…we're strong enough to handle whatever comes our way, Sam, including this."

"What are you talking about?" Sam asked.

"Sam, it's alright, I know," Freddie said gently.

"You-You know?" Sam said, her eyes widening. "How?"

"I overheard you and Carly talking earlier," Freddie explained.

"Aw man," Sam moaned.

"Baby, I told you, we can handle it," Freddie said, stroking her cheek. "And don't be afraid. I know you're worried about money and how your body's going to be changing, but that's completely natural."

"I don't think my body will change too much if I just don't eat any of them," Sam shrugged. "I'll probably break down and eat a few, but hopefully that won't do anything too funky."

"Sam, you have to eat, you need your nutrients," Freddie told her. "We should take you to the doctors too. He can start you on some of those vitamins. But you seriously need to eat; I mean, you _do _have a little baby growing in you and-"

"What?" Sam exclaimed. "I have a _what _in me?"

"A baby," Freddie repeated slowly.

"No I don't!"

It was Freddie's turn to be confused. "Huh? But-But you're pregnant!"

Sam gasped. "_Excuse _me, nub? I am _not _pregnant!"

"But-But I heard you!" Freddie said. "You-You were talking to Carly about being worried about money and not having enough space and how your body was going to change from something!"

"Um…that-that was about something else," Sam said slowly. "Not about me being pregnant."

"So-So you're not pregnant?" Freddie said.

Sam shook her head. "Nope."

"I-Oh…" he said softly. "Oh, well, that's-that's good then."

"You okay?" Sam asked, noticing the crestfallen look on his face.

"Yeah," Freddie said quickly. "It's just…I-I was sorting getting used to the idea of us having a baby. I was starting to actually look forward to being a dad."

"Aw," Sam said, squeezing his shoulder. "We can still have a baby…someday."

Freddie sighed. "Yeah. Yeah, you're right. Someday you and I will have a cute little baby to raise together."

Sam smiled and gave him a short kiss. "I'm sorry."

"No, it's not your fault," Freddie shrugged. "Hey…if you weren't talking to Carly about being pregnant, then what _were _you talking about?"

"Oh…" Sam said, giving a nervous chuckle. "_That_. Well, um, you-you remember how you said we were strong enough to handle whatever comes our way?"

"Yes…" Freddie nodded.

"Well…_cling _to that," Sam said slowly.

"Sam…? What's going on?"

"I, er, sort of used the money we saved to paint the kitchen to win an auction for 8,000 Fat Cakes that I later found out were the low-fat kind that I can't eat, so now we have a huge shipment of them coming in two weeks," Sam said quickly.

"Sam!" Freddie cried. "How could you-why would you-_Sam_!"


	488. Chapter 488

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 468, where Sam gives up going to a exhibit from her favorite T.V. show to go with Freddie to his AV club's banquet. **

…

_Stereotype_

"This is gonna be so much fun," Freddie said excitedly as him and Sam walked down the hall towards the school's gymnasium. "You'll see, you'll have a good time tonight, baby."

"Yeah, I bet," Sam smirked. "Hanging out with Ridgeway's finest tech doofs and geeks. Hey, are we gonna get to take apart a camera and ogle at all the cool parts?"

"Cute," Freddie said, rolling his eyes. "You know, just because we're going to a banquet for the AV club, that doesn't mean it's going to be lame. The AV club isn't filled with your stereotypical nerds; these are really ambitious students who are just like any 'normal' person at this school."

"Freddie! You're here!" a gawky boy exclaimed happily, running out of the auditorium. "Just in time! The projector for the slideshow isn't working so we're taking turns taking it apart to try and find the problem; pretty neat huh?"

"Seriously?" Freddie grinned. "And I thought this night couldn't get any better."

"Whoa!" another boy said, poking his head into the hall. "Did you bring a _date_, Freddie?"

"Oh yeah," Freddie said, putting an arm around Sam. "This is my girlfriend, Sam. Sam, these are some of the AV guys, Buster and Craig."

"Sure…we'll say they qualify as guys," Sam said under her breath so Freddie wouldn't hear her.

"Dude!" the first boy said. "You realize you're the first person in the history of the AV banquet to bring a real date! You're going to be a legend!"

"Yeah, well," Freddie said modestly.

"So…I was promised _steak_," Sam said as the boys continued to stare at her as if she was an alien from another planet.

"Oh right, let's go," Freddie said. "I'll see you guys later!"

"Hey, Freddie? Can I take a picture with your girlfriend?" the second boy asked. "You know, to prove to everyone that I've socialized with a girl who wasn't my mom or sister?"

"Um…we're gonna pass on that," Freddie said quickly before Sam could say anything.

"So what was it you were saying about these guys being normal?" Sam said triumphantly.

"Yeah…that wasn't really helping my point," Freddie admitted. "But there _are _some normal people here. Like Brad! Hey, Brad!"

The couple walked over to Brad, who was standing by the drinks table.

"Hey Freddie, hey Sam," Brad greeted them. "How's it going?"

"You're here alone?" Sam asked, somewhat surprised that he hadn't managed to find a date.

"Yeah, I was so busy baking fudge with my great grandma for this banquet that I sort of forgot about that," Brad shrugged.

"Too bad," Freddie said. "But that's okay, you can just-"

"Wait," Sam cut him off. "Your fudge is here?"

"Oh yeah," Brad nodded. "Over at that table back there."

Sam's face lit up. "I'll be back."

Freddie chuckled as he watched Sam run across the room towards the fudge.

"You realize with Sam here, you're basically going to be a celebrity tonight," Brad said to Freddie. "Most of these AV guys have never even talked to a girl outside of a classroom."

"I know," Freddie said happily. "I'm finally popular. It's within the AV club, but it still counts, right?"

"Sure," Brad agreed.

"I'm just glad she came," Freddie said, smiling at her from across the room as she piled a good pound of fudge onto her plate. "She really is amazing. You see the way her hair is shining under those florescent lights? Breathtaking, isn't it?"

"She's really got you gone," Brad said, amused.

"She does," Freddie nodded. "But I love her anyway."

Brad playfully rolled his eyes. "Well, I should go make sure that group of guys by their laptops haven't gone into cardiac arrest from staring at her. Good thing I know CPR…"

Freddie had to admit he was absolutely loving all of the attention him and Sam were getting. Normally he'd be a little jealous about other guys gawking at Sam, but after all, these AV guys were probably afraid to even speak to her, let alone try anything, so what harm could they do.

"Hey, you gonna save any fudge for anybody else?" Freddie asked, joining Sam at the deserts table.

"Probably not," Sam said honestly, popping a piece in her mouth. She looked over at the group of boys staring at her. "God, they're pathetic."

"If they're making you uncomfortable, I'll tell them to stop," Freddie said.  
Sam shook her head. "Nah, it's fine."

"You sure?"

Sam gave him a small smile. "I _do _look really hot in this dress."

"I know, it's going to be hard for _me _not stare all night," Freddie said. "But I think they're going to start serving dinner now. Let's go sit."

"Alright," Sam nodded, stuffing the last of the fudge in her mouth. "There's a table right there."

"Oh, we're sitting at that big table on stage," Freddie told her, nodding over to the front of the gym.

"Really?" Sam said, somewhat impressed.

"Yeah, I'm the outgoing president of this club, I get perks," Freddie said, taking her hand and leading her up on stage.

"Wow, so you're like the head dork?"

"Basically, which would make _you_ the girlfriend of the head dork," Freddie laughed.

"Oh jeez," Sam said, shaking her head.

….

Although Sam hadn't expected to even be able to keep her eyes awake during the AV club banquet, she soon found herself having fun. Those doofs really knew how to make a good slideshow, and the food was unbelievable. Freddie was even awarded a special scholarship for all he had done for the club throughout his four years of high school, and Sam felt an incredible sense of pride as she watched her boyfriend shake hands with Principal Franklin and receive a shiny gold plaque.

And even though she kept rolling eyes as the AV guys stared and stammered nervously at her the whole night, she did find herself enjoying it a little. It was nice to actually be considered the 'hot chick' for once; the girl in the center of attention.

"Thanks for coming with me tonight," Freddie said that evening as they stood in front of the door later that evening. "I know you really wanted to go to that exhibit thing."

"I actually wasn't entirely miserable," Sam told him. "Plus it was your big night…I'm glad I went."

Freddie smiled. "It wouldn't have been the same without you there."

"Yeah, without me it would've been a total loser fest," Sam smirked.

Freddie rolled his eyes as he leaned over and kissed her. "I'll see you tomorrow, baby."

"Bye," Sam said, giving him one last hug before she retreated into the Shay's apartment.

"You're alive," Carly commented, looking up from the book she was reading. "I was getting worried; I thought you didn't survive the AV banquet. So how was it?"

"It wasn't as lame as I thought it would be," Sam shrugged, kicking off her shoes. "I think some steakhouse must've catered the whole thing; the food was _good_."

"Aw, so you and Freddie had a nice time?"

"Yeah, I guess," Sam nodded, trying not to seem _too _happy.

"See, aren't you glad you went after all?" Carly said. "I'm sure Freddie really appreciated having you there on such an important night for him."

"Yeah, I guess it was just as fun as seeing the three-winged bat would've been," Sam nodded.


	489. Chapter 489

_Sweet_

Freddie paced nervously back and forth in the waiting room of the hospital, little beads of anxious sweat trickling down his face.

"Dad, you're wearing a hole in the floor," Ashton said, though she was nervously tapping her own foot.

"Seriously, Freddie, you look like you're about to pass out," Carly said, getting up from her seat between Clarissa and Jason. "You want to sit down?"

"No," Freddie sighed. "I just wish I knew what was going on. Shouldn't we have heard something by now?"

"Freddie, Emma went into labor twenty minutes ago," Carly reminded him. "It _kind of _takes longer than that for anything to happen."

"How long _does _it take?" Tyler asked.

"It depends," Carly said. "Didn't it take Sam almost a whole day to have Jason?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "And Tyler was born in less than two…I just hope Emma's okay."

That afternoon, the Benson family, along with Quincy, Carly, and Clarissa, had gathered for a big dinner to celebrate Quincy and Emma coming to visit from their home in Oregon. Emma and Quincy had decided they wanted their baby to be born around all their friends and family in Seattle, so they were staying with Sam and Freddie for the time being. Emma, though, wound up going into labor in the middle of the dinner, two weeks before her due date, and the whole party had rushed her to the hospital.

Quincy was obviously back with Emma, and Emma had also asked Sam to be in the delivery room with her as well. She was scared, and she wanted her mother to be with her.

"We're here! Is there a baby yet? Am I a grandpa?" Gibby exclaimed, bursting into the waiting room with Tasha and his other sons, Huey and Kirby, at his heels.

"No," Freddie replied. "No baby yet."

"Well where's Emma then?" Gibby asked. "Tell her to speed things along!"

"She's in the delivery room!" Freddie frowned. "You know, _delivering_! Quincy and Sam are back there too."  
"What? How come Sam gets to be back there?"

"Because Emma wanted her to be with her," Freddie replied. "She's her mom."

"I'm Quincy's dad!" Gibby pointed out.

"No offense Gib, but I think Emma _kind of _needs Sam more than Quincy needs you right now," Freddie said.

"Aren't you and Sam excited?" Tasha asked. "We're all going to be grandparents."

"Wow, that makes you all really old, doesn't it?" Jason smirked.

"Yes, thank you, Jason," Freddie snapped.

"Oh come on, you're not old," Carly said. "You guys aren't even fifty yet."

"You're the one who almost had a breakdown last week because you thought you found a gray hair," Freddie grinned.

"Well that's serious! You know how I am with my hair!" Carly defended.

"Dad, Clarissa and I are going to the gift shop," Ashton told Freddie. "I want to see if I can find some flowers or something to bring in to Em when we finally get to see her."

"Alright," Freddie nodded.

"Hey, we're coming too," Tyler said as him, Huey and Kirby got up.

"Why would you guys want to come look in a hospital gift shop?" Clarissa asked.

"Hot student nurses, duh," Tyler said as if it were obvious.

"Jason," Freddie sighed as the five started down the hall to the gift shop. "Go keep an eye on your brother and make sure he doesn't do anything stupid."  
"Dad, he's eighteen, do I really need to babysit him?" Jason groaned.

"Absolutely," Freddie nodded.

"Fine," Jason conceded, getting up and following everybody else out of the waiting room.

"Hey, you realize we're going to be _co_-grandpas?" Gibby said to Freddie.

"Yes, Gibby, I realize that," Freddie nodded.

"Isn't that cool? I mean when the baby learns how to talk and it says 'grandpa' it could be talking to both of us at once!" Gibby said happily.

"So cool," Freddie mumbled.

"Hey, you guys think the baby will be a boy or a girl?" Carly asked.

"Oh I hope it's a girl," Tasha smiled. "I've always wanted a daughter, and a granddaughter would be almost like getting one!"

"I hope it's a boy," Gibby said.

"How come?" Carly questioned.

"Because _that _way they can name the little guy Gibby Jr.!"

"My grandson will _not _be named Gibby Jr.," Freddie said firmly. "I think Sam will throw a chair at you if that happens."

"What are you hoping for?" Carly said. "A grandson or a granddaughter?"

"Either way I'm fine," Freddie shrugged. He looked at his phone. "I wish I could at least know how she's doing back there."

"I'm sure she's fine," Carly assured him. "Sam would've been here to tell us by now if she wasn't."

"I know," Freddie nodded. "Still, I just can't stop worrying. I mean, even if she has this baby with no problems, is she ready for this? She's just a little girl, after all…"

"Freddie, she's twenty-two," Carly reminded him. "That's not exactly a child anymore. Besides, you and Sam were twenty-two too when you guys had Jason, and everything turned out fine."

"Yeah, I know she's an adult now and everything but I-I still can't help but-I still-"

"You think of her as your baby girl still, don't you?" Carly said knowingly.

"Well…yeah," Freddie nodded.

Carly squeezed his shoulder reassuringly. "She still is…just, now she's your grown-up baby girl. And her and Quincy will be just fine being parents."

"I know," Freddie nodded. "It's just…it seems like just yesterday I was pacing around waiting for _her _to be born."

"Time flies," Carly smiled.

"Yes it does," Freddie said heavily.

…

An hour later, once everybody had returned to the waiting room, Freddie still had not sat down once.

"Hey!" Gibby said suddenly, causing everybody in the room to look at him.

"What is it?" Freddie asked.  
"Do you guys think they call this place a waiting room because they send people in here to wait?"

Everybody let out a loud groan.

"Dad…don't be offended if I pretend I don't know you for the next few hours," Kirby said, shaking his head.

"Gibby, how could you have just realized this?" Carly frowned.

"What? I'm not a rocket scientist!" Gibby snapped. "How was I supposed to ever know that-"

"You guys!"

Everybody turned around as Sam rushed into the room.

"Sam!" Freddie said as she hurried over to the group. "How is she? Is she okay? Did everything-"

"Emma's fine, baby," Sam said, throwing her arms around him. "We're officially grandparents!"

Everyone cheered as Freddie hugged Sam tightly and Gibby and Tasha exchanged a quick kiss.

"So I'm an Aunt?" Ashton said excitedly.

"We're Uncles, dude!" Tyler said, high-fiving Jason.

"I can't believe this…I'm so happy for them," Freddie said, kissing Sam. "Wait, do we have a grandson or a granddaughter?"

"Granddaughter," Sam beamed. "You've got to see her! She's so tiny and precious and cute!"

"Well _can _we see her?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah, come on!" Sam nodded.

The party followed her back down a long hall and through a door into a small room.

Emma was lying on a hospital bed and Quincy was standing beside her, his arm around her as they both smiled down at a small bundle of blankets in her arms.

"You up for some visitors?" Sam asked from the doorway.

"Yeah!" Emma grinned as everyone gathered around her bed, trying to get a look at the newest addition to the family.

"Oh my God!" Ashton whispered, wiping a few tears from her eyes. "Look at her! She's perfect!"

"Yeah, she is," Quincy nodded.

"Congrats, you guys," Jason said.

"Thanks," Emma replied. She looked over at Clarissa and her sister. "By the way, all those things you've heard about this hurting more than anything in the world…they're right."

"You still did great, sweetie," Sam said, stroking her daughter's hair.

"Hey, I think she got my nose!" Gibby said excitedly.

"Aw, what a lucky girl," Tasha grinned.

"Clearly lucky is a relative term," Sam mumbled to Carly.

"Hey, do you have a name picked out?" Tyler asked.

"Gibby Jr. is still on the table," Gibby pointed out.

"Gibby, that sweet little girl doesn't deserve that!" Carly said.

"Er, sorry dad," Quincy said quickly. "But we already have a name picked out."  
"Well what is it?" Huey asked.

"Savannah," Emma said. "We had that name picked for a girl for a few months now."

"Cute," Sam commented. "Not too girly…I like it."

"Yeah," Emma nodded. She looked over at Freddie, who still hadn't said a word. "Dad? You-You okay?"

"Yeah," Freddie said softly, rubbing his eyes. "It's just…she's beautiful."

"Are you crying?" Sam smirked.

"It's the birth of my first grandchild, I have the right to cry, thank you!" Freddie pointed out.

Sam rolled her eyes playfully.

"You wanna hold her daddy?" Emma asked. "You know, when you stop crying and can see properly?"

The room, including Freddie, laughed.

"Of course I want to hold her," Freddie said as Sam handed him a tissue. He made his way over to the bed and Emma carefully transferred the newborn into his arms.

He looked down at her, feeling an overwhelming sense of emotions as she slowly opened her dark eyes.

"Hi there Savannah, I'm your grandpa," Freddie said softly. "Welcome to the world."


	490. Chapter 490

_Reluctance_

"Only twenty-two hours left of this torture!" Freddie announced, coming into the Shay's apartment, where Carly and Spencer were playing a game of slap jack.

"Torture?" Spencer frowned, jerking his hand away from the pile of cards as Carly made to slap it away from the jack that had just shown up. "Hey! Stop slapping my hand!"

"It's slap jack, what am I supposed to do?" Carly asked, amused.

"Not slap me!"

"Well then you lose!"

"Fine, I didn't want to play anyway!" Spencer pouted.

"You're the one who begged _me_ to play!"

"So what's this torture you're talking about?" Spencer asked Freddie, eager to change the subject.

"He's just talking about the fact that Sam's been out of town for the past weekend," Carly smirked, rolling her eyes.

"What? You don't miss her?" Freddie said.

"Of course I do, I'm just less pathetic about it," Carly replied.

"Oh yeah, I was wondering how that pork roast lasted so long in the fridge," Spencer said. "Where'd she go?"

"To Texas," Freddie mumbled. "Her and her mom went to visit her cousin and celebrate her release from prison."

"Yes, so he's had to go _two whole days _without making out with her," Carly said. "It's the end of the world."

"What'd you do? Borrow Sam's sarcasm before she left?" Freddie frowned.

"Dude, relax, Sam's coming home tomorrow," Carly said. "You can make it. When she gets back we'll all go get a pizza or something."

"Okay," Freddie sighed. "I just really miss her. This is the longest we've been apart since we've started dating. It's tough."

"Hey, who would've even invented a game like slap jack?" Spencer said. "Who'd _want _to be slapped?"

"Anyway…" Carly said, shaking her head at her brother. "Aren't you supposed to be over at Sam's now taking care of Frothy?"

"You mean that rabid _beast?_" Freddie said darkly. "I was about to head over there now. That's another reason I can't wait for Sam to be back; I can't stand taking care of that thing!"

"I know, Frothy is pretty…_difficult_," Carly nodded. "Before you two started dating I was always the one who had to take care of him."

"That thing is vicious!" Freddie exclaimed. "He scratches me, he jumps onto my arm, he hisses at me…he's _clearly_ Sam's cat."

"Well just remember, today's the last day you have to deal with him," Carly said.

"Thank God," Freddie said.

"Hey, maybe instead of slap jack, it was supposed to be _clap_ jack," Spencer said. "You know, when you draw a jack, everybody _claps_ for that person. Not brutally attacks them!"

"That's it!" Carly said. "From now on the only card game you're playing is solitaire!"

….

Later that afternoon, Freddie let himself into Sam's house, bracing himself for Frothy to come racing over to attack him.

Thankfully, though, the cat appeared to be occupied elsewhere in the house and Freddie figured he had at least a few pain-free minutes before Frothy found him.

He headed into the kitchen and filled Frothy's food dish, cleaned out the litter box and set our fresh water. Now all that was left was for him to give the feline his eardrops and then he could return home to mope about Sam's absence.

"Alright Frothy!" Freddie called throughout the house, stepping over a discarded bikini top (most likely Pam's) and he began his search. "Let's get this over with! Come here you crazy cat! Frothy!"

Freddie was a little confused now; Frothy always came out when he came over. "Frothy!" he said loudly again, looking around the living room. "I have to put your eardrops in! Frothy!"

Suddenly he spotted a white figure laying behind the couch.

"Oh good, you're asleep," Freddie said, stepping over to the cat. "Maybe it will be a little easier to get these drops in you."  
But as Freddie kneeled down by the cat, he realized that something wasn't right here;

Frothy didn't stir at all.

"Er, Frothy?" Freddie frowned. "Um…you-you okay there?"

Slowly, he reached out and touched him, letting out a small gasp of surprise when he felt how cold he was.

"Oh no…" Freddie said softly. "Oh no, no, no! Frothy! Frothy, don't do this to me!"

He gently shook the cat and even reluctantly rolled up his pant leg and placed his bare leg in front of him to try and bait him.

But nothing worked.

"Aw jeez," Freddie sighed.

Sam's precious cat was dead. He didn't know how Sam would react, but it sure wasn't going to be good.

…..

"Frothy's _dead_?" Carly exclaimed later that evening as Freddie paced anxiously in the living room.

"Yes, dead!" Freddie nodded. "As in no longer living!"

"Poor Sam," Carly said. "She loved Frothy…"

"I know," Freddie said heavily. "She'd going to be devastated when she finds out. And probably mad at me…"

"You didn't kill Frothy though," Carly pointed out.

"Yeah, but he died on _my _watch," Freddie said. "Plus you know Sam's never exactly rational when she's angry."

"I know," Carly nodded. "But I still don't think she'll blame you as long as you break it to her gently. You have all night to figure out what you're going to say to her before she comes home tomorrow and-"

"Hey, hey!" Sam suddenly cried, bursting in the front door.

"Sam?" Carly frowned. "What are you-You're back?"

"Yeah," Sam grinned. "My cousin actually wound up getting sent _back _to prison today for something involving a bottle of salad dressing and a receptionist, and that kind of cut the celebration short, so we got home earlier than expected."

She wrapped her arms around Freddie's neck and kissed. "Miss me, nub?" she smirked.

"Y-Yeah, of course," Freddie said.

"Well, um, glad you're back, Sam," Carly said, giving her best friend a quick hug. "But, er, why don't I give you and Freddie some time by yourself to, um, _talk _about things?"

"What sort of things do we-" Sam began, but Carly had already bolted upstairs.

_Thanks a lot, Carls_, Freddie thought to himself.

"What's with her?" Sam asked.

"Who knows," Freddie shrugged.

"Hey, how was Frothy while you took care of him?" Sam asked. "Oh, you should see the new collar I got him in Texas. It has all these little cowboy hats on it."

Freddie took a deep breath. "Sam…let's sit. I need to tell you something."

"What's wrong?" Sam asked, confused.

"Have-Have you been home yet?" Freddie questioned.

Sam shook her head. "No. I asked my mom to drop me right off here so I could see you and Carly."

"Okay," Freddie sighed. "That makes sense then…"

"What makes sense?" Sam frowned. "What-What's going on?"

Freddie reached for her hand and squeezed it gently. "Um, okay, baby? When-When I went over to your house today to, you know, feed Frothy and give him his eardrops, I found-he was-he was dead, Sam."

Sam's eyes widened. "W-What?"

"I'm sorry," Freddie said softly. "I just went in there and he was-"

"Well are you sure he wasn't just sleeping?" Sam demanded. "Sometimes after he eats a lot he just passes out and lazes around for a couple hours!"

"He wasn't asleep," Freddie told her.

Sam looked down at her feet. "Are you _positive_?"

"Positive," Freddie nodded. He put an arm around her. "I'm so sorry."

Sam didn't reply.

"Sam?" Freddie said slowly. "You-You okay?"

"I-Yeah, I'm fine," Sam said in a shaky voice.

Freddie reached over and wiped the few tears that had fallen onto her cheek. "No you're not."

Sam sniffed. "He-He was an old cat…he had to go at some point, right? I-I should've been expecting this."

"Sam, you loved Frothy," Freddie said. "It's okay for you to be sad about this."

Sam rested her head on his shoulder. "But he was just a cat."

Freddie gave her a knowing look. "Was he really?"

And at those words, more tears fell from Sam's eyes as she buried her face in the crook of his neck. "No."

Freddie held her tight as she cried, her tears soaking his shirt. "I had him for almost my whole life," she whispered. "My mom got him for me after-after my dad left us. I had him even before I knew Carly…he was my oldest friend. And now he's gone? And I didn't even get to say goodbye to him?"

"You can still say goodbye," Freddie told her. "And Frothy was a good cat; at least he'll always be remembered that way."  
"You hated him," Sam mumbled.

"You loved him," Freddie said simply. "And I love you…so for that reason, I could never hate him."


	491. Chapter 491

**AN-This is a sequel to chapter 445, where Freddie finds out Emma is on birth control.**

…**..**

_Relation_

Freddie sat on his couch, mindlessly flipping though channels on the T.V.

"Hey dude," Gibby said, letting himself into the Benson's home. "What's up?"

Freddie rolled his eyes. Honestly, Gibby was one of the last people he wanted to see right now. "Nothing," he said simply.

"Awesome," Gibby said, oblivious to Freddie's less-than-warm response. He sat down next to Freddie. "What are we watching?"

"I don't know," Freddie sighed. "Nothing good is on."

"I thought there was a _Galaxy Wars _marathon on," Gibby said.

"Well there isn't!" Freddie snapped.

"Okay." Gibby shrugged. "Let's just watch a game show or something.  
Freddie rolled his eyes as Gibby made himself at home. "Hey, look!" he said happily. "There's a new episode of _Extreme Fear Facers _on!"

"Uh-huh," Freddie mumbled, trying not to think about the fact that Gibby's son was the reason he felt so upset right now. As great of a kid as he knew Quincy was, that still didn't mean he had to jump up and down at the fact that him and his daughter were apparently getting so into their relationship that they were taking _those _steps.

"Hey, you know, we should try out for this show," Gibby said. "We could make matching T-shirts too! With our _faces _on them! What do you think, you in?"

"No, Gibby, we can't try out for a show that would probably kill us," Freddie said, rolling his eyes as he watched a man fall into a pit of very scary looking squids.

"Hmm, so even after over twenty years of friendship, you still get your jollies from squashing my dreams," Gibby said curtly. "Good to know. I'll just try out for this show with Tasha. _She _doesn't squash my dreams."

"I'm not squashing your dreams!" Freddie groaned. "Look, if you're going to get so uptight about this, why don't you just go watch this show at _your _place. I'm sure your T.V. picks up the channel too."

"Oh I can't go home," Gibby replied.

"Why not?" Freddie frowned.

"Because," Gibby said simply. "Emma and Quincy are there, and I decided to let them have the place to themselves."

"What?" Freddie exclaimed, jumping to his feet. "Gibby! How could you! You-You just-Gibby! Let's go! We're going over to your house right now and putting an end to that!"

"Dude, what's your problem?" Gibby asked. "You're eye's sort of starting to do an angry tick thing."

"I _am_ angry!" Freddie yelled. "Why would you leave them there at your house _alone_?"

"Well _I _didn't want to watch them suck face all day," Gibby cringed.

"Well they're gonna do a whole lot more than suck face now!"

"What do you mean?" Gibby asked, confused.

"What do you _think _I mean?" Freddie snapped. "What do you _think _two _dating_ teenagers all full of hormones are gonna do in an empty house?"

"I dunno, play cards or something?" Gibby shrugged.

"Are you _really _that naive?" Freddie cried.

"Wow," Gibby said, crossing his arms. "You know, man, words _hurt _sometimes!"

"Yeah, well you're lucky I don't _really _hurt you," Freddie said.

"Why? Did you find my diary?" Gibby gasped, his eyes widening. "I swear, I didn't mean it when I wrote-"

"No!" Freddie said.

"Then why are you all wazzed off at me?"

"Because!" Freddie said. "Because of _your _son, my daughter is now-she's thinking about-Ah! I can't even say it!"

"Whoa, your face is really red," Gibby commented. "It's like the color of-"

"Will you stop analyzing my face and focus?"  
"Focus on what? You haven't told me what's wrong yet," Gibby pointed out. "Jeez, when you get mad, you become forgetful."

Freddie took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down before he took a page out of Sam's book and found her butter sock. "Okay, Gibby, the other day, I found out that-that Emma's been-she's been taking birth control."

He looked at Gibby, expecting him to be at least a little surprised, but he didn't seem to bit shocked.

"What's that got to do with me or Quincy though?"

Freddie shook his head at his friend's ignorance. "Well why do you think she's _on _birth control in the first place?"

"I don't know, I'm not a doctor," Gibby shrugged.

"Well I'll tell you why!" Freddie said, his voice rising again. "She's on birth control because she's at least _thinking _about doing _things _with _your _son!"

"Things?" Gibby repeated. "What sort of things!"

"Gibby, I'm _begging _you," Freddie said. "Use your head for once in your life!"

"Hey! I use my head a lot!" Gibby said indignantly. "Just the other day when I was getting ice cream, I realized getting two scoops of ice cream was a better deal then getting one scoop! Now will you just tell me what sort of things you're talking about and-oh, wait, you don't mean _those _things, do you?"

"Yes I mean _those _things!" Freddie exclaimed.

"But teenagers don't do those sorts of things," Gibby frowned.  
"Oh what world do you live in?" Freddie scoffed, grabbing his keys and coat. "Now if you'll excuse me, _one _of us has to be a good parent and put a stop to this!"

…

A few moments later, Freddie arrived at Gibby's house.

"Can't believe Gibby would just leave two teenagers here alone!" Freddie muttered angrily as stormed up the driveway to the front door. "It's like he wants to see me explode or something!"

Quickly grabbing the spare key that Gibby kept under the mat, Freddie let himself into the house, prepared for the worst.

"Alright you two!" he yelled, bursting in. "You're both busted! You're-"

He fell silent, though, as he spotted Quincy and Emma sitting around the coffee table in the living room, playing cards.

"Um…hello," Quincy said slowly.

"Daddy? What are you doing here?" Emma frowned.

"I-I just-what are you doing?" Freddie said, dumbfounded.

"Playing Go Fish," Quincy replied. "See, we were watching T.V. earlier and this show came on that said girls are usually better at card games that boys, and _I _said it was total garbage, but Emma claimed it was true. So we decided to test the theory."

"And so far I'm right," Emma grinned. "We've been playing for almost an hour and I haven't lost yet."

"Probably because you're cheating," Quincy mumbled.

"So-Wait," Freddie said, confused. "You two have just been playing cards this whole time?"

"Well we took an iced tea break," Quincy said, holding up a glass.

"I-Okay then," Freddie said. "Er, great!"

"Why'd you come over, though?" Emma asked.

"I just-Never mind," Freddie said, pulling his wallet out of his pocket. "Look, why don't you guys go _out _and do something? My treat."

"Seriously?" Quincy said.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded, handing Emma a few bills. "Go to the mall, get lunch, do _something _out of this house."

"Okay," Emma said, choosing not question her father further. "Thanks, daddy."

"Yeah, thanks," Quincy said. "Hey, Em, wanna go play paintball?"

"Sure, I could go for beating you at something else," Emma smiled, taking his hand as they headed to the door. She looked over her shoulder. "Bye, dad. I'll be home for dinner."

As the couple left, Freddie stood in the middle of the living room, shaking his head.

"Unbelievable…they were just playing cards. Just like Gibby said…Dang it! He was _right_!"


	492. Chapter 492

_Hill_

"Sam? Sam, baby, wake up," Freddie said, gently nudging his girlfriend.

"It's too early!" Sam moaned, lifting her head from his shoulder. "Why'd you drag me out here?"

"It will be worth it," Freddie said, wrapping the blanket closer around the two of them as they sat on top of a small hill in the middle of the park.

"Why couldn't we wait until noon, when it's _normal _to be awake?" Sam yawned.

"Because, you can't watch a sunrise at _noon_," Freddie said, rolling his eyes.

"Yes you can," Sam mumbled. "It's called the Internet."

"You can't just watch a video of a sunrise and get the same experience," Freddie told her. "As much as I love computers, they can't compare to the real thing on this."

"But it's six in the morning!" Sam said.

"Well I told you that you should go to bed early," Freddie replied. "But you're the one who stayed up until three watching Japanese monster movies."

He handed her a cup of coffee. "Here, I picked this up for you; I figured you'd need it."

Sam took a sip. "Hey, you got my coffee order right."

"A large late with three shots of espresso, two pumps of hazelnut, three of vanilla and four of caramel with extra whipped cream and chocolate drizzle," Freddie recited proudly. "Took eight months of us dating, but I finally got it down."

"Well, maybe this will keep me awake," Sam sighed. "How much longer?"

"About ten minutes," Freddie answered. "Have you ever seen a sunrise before?"  
Sam shook her head. "I'm usually asleep like the rest of the world."

Freddie gave a small chuckle. "Well then I'm glad I get to be here with you for your first time."

"How many sunrises have _you_ seen?" Sam asked.

"A few," Freddie said. "I used to wake up and watch them with my dad before him and my mom divorced.

"Really?" Sam said softly.

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "He told me they were really romantic, so when I got older I should take the girl I loved to see one. So I did."

Sam smiled, suddenly less annoyed that Freddie had dragged her out here at the crack of dawn.

"You know, I kind of like how quiet it is right now," Sam said, looking around the empty park that was usually filled with the hustle of busy people. "No stupid joggers, no annoying kids…just us."

"I like it too," Freddie nodded. "Hey…can I ask you something?"

"What?"

"Well in our eight months that we've been together, have…has it been-have I-have you been happy?" Freddie said.

Sam stared up at him. "What do you mean?"

"Have I been, you know, a decent boyfriend?" Freddie asked, his face turning a little red.

"What are you talking about? Of course you have," Sam said, a little surprised at his apparent insecurity. "You've done everything in the boyfriend handbook. You buy me flowers, you take me out to nice restaurants, you tell me I'm pretty even when I've just rolled out of bed, you put up with my weird habits and, well, don't go spreading this around, but you're not a bad kisser."  
Freddie laughed. "Thanks…so you-you've really been happy during our relationship?"

"Well I wouldn't have woken up six hours early if you weren't a pretty amazing boyfriend, would I?" Sam smirked, leaning over to give him a quick kiss.

"Good," Freddie said, relieved. "I just wanted to make sure I've been making you feel happy…you deserve that, Sam."

"You make me feel like a princess," Sam whispered. "Which is sort of something I figured no guy would ever be able to do."

Freddie wrapped his arms around her. "Well you are a princess. You're my Princess Puckett. And I love you."

"Love you too," Sam said, resting her head on his chest. She looked up at the sky. "Hey…is that it? Is that the sunrise?"

"Yeah," Freddie nodded. "That's it…"

The couple silently stared at the scene, watching the orange and yellows and light pinks mix as the sun rose slowly into the sky.

"Whoa," Sam said. "That-That was…_beautiful_."

"I know," Freddie agreed. "Worth getting up this morning?"

Sam squeezed his hand. "Definitely."


	493. Chapter 493

_Margin_

"Why did we let Carly talk us into this?" Sam moaned as she pulled on her coat.

"Oh come on, it won't be that bad," Freddie said.

"It's the opera," Sam said. "It _has _to be bad. We're gonna be forced to sit through six hours of fat ladies singing!"

"Well you know how Carly gets when she has these ideas," Freddie reasoned. "She was going to force us into couple's opera night one way or another, so we might as well get it over with."

"You better hope they have a decent snack stand," Sam said. "If I'm gonna endure this, I need chili fries."

"Seriously doubt they'll be selling chili fries at one of the fanciest theatres in Washington," Freddie chuckled as the couple stepped into their living room where their four children were sitting.

"Alright guys, we're off," Sam said.

"Where are you going?" nine-year old Tyler asked.

"To a very boring place," Sam replied, kissing the top of his head. "Jason, you're in charge. There's pizza money in the kitchen."

"Got it," the seventeen-year old said, not looking away from the T.V.

"Emma, remember, you need to study for your English exam tomorrow," Freddie said. "So no T.V. tonight."  
"What?" Emma exclaimed. "But there's a new episode of _Outrageous Cheerleading Accidents _on tonight. Apparently some cheer captain forgot to calculate a margin of error for her squad's pyramid so the whole thing comes crashing down!"

"You can record it," Sam said. She turned to Ashton. "You're working on your science project tonight, right?"

"Yeah, my partner's coming over in a little," Ashton nodded.

"Good," she said. "Alright, you have our numbers. Call us if you need anything."

"Come on, we're gonna be late," Freddie said.

"Yeah…that'd be a _shame_," Sam mumbled under her breath as her and Freddie walked out the door.

Once Sam and Freddie were gone, Jason turned off the T.V. "Alright well, I'm starving. Tyler, go call and order the pizza."

"Why me?" Tyler frowned.

"Because I'm in charge," Jason said simply.

Muttering indignantly, Tyler headed into the kitchen.

"Hey, put the T.V. back on," Emma said. "I was getting into that show."

"Aren't you supposed to study?" Jason pointed out.

"Pfft, like I'm gonna do that," Emma scoffed.

"Um, yes you are, I'm not gonna get busted when _you _fail your test," Jason said.

"What? Come on!" Emma exclaimed. "Most kids are supposed to have fun when their older brothers are in charge. You're just as bad as mom and dad!"

"Yeah, sucks for you, doesn't it?" Jason said, kicking his feet up onto the coffee table. "Now beat it."

Giving her brother one last glare, Emma stormed upstairs.

Jason glanced over at Ashton. "So…I could really go for a soda right about now."

"You know, just because mom and dad left you in charge, doesn't mean you can boss us around," Ashton said. "You can't make me get you sodas!"

"Sure I can," Jason said. "Because if you _don't _mom and dad will find out who broke that lamp in their bedroom last month…"

"Ugh! You're the worst!" Ashton groaned, getting up and heading into the kitchen.

"And nothing diet!" Jason called after him, leaning back in his seat. "And mom and dad make this parenting stuff look hard…ha!"

…

An hour later, Jason was playing videogames in the living room when Ashton came in.  
"Hey, can you at least get your gross feet off the coffee table? My science partner's gonna be here any minute and we need to work in here."  
"Can't you guys go up to your room? I'm battling zombies here," Jason said.

"No, because Emma's up there actually studying," Ashton replied.

"Whatever," Jason sighed, moving his feet. "You two better not make too much noise, though, because I'm on a roll and-no! I died! How could I have died? I had the shield of severed heads?"

"Ha-ha," Ashton smirked.

"Oh shut up," Jason said, rolling his eyes as he tossed the controller down. "Well, I had to do homework anyway, now you can have the living room to yourself."

"Cool, thanks," Ashton said as Jason grabbed his backpack and headed into the kitchen just as the doorbell rang.

Ashton stepped over to the front door and opened up, revealing a tall boy with shaggy hair. "Hey there Ashton, looking good."

Ashton rolled her eyes. "Hi Mike. Come on, let's get this project over with."

When she had gotten paired up with Mike in class, she had been less-than-thrilled. Mike was known as the school's slime ball and Ashton wanted to get this project done as soon as possible.

"So," Ashton said, sitting down on the couch. "Mr. Dumphrey said that all we really needed to do for this project was look up some sort of natural phenomenon and make a slideshow about it. I figure it shouldn't take more than an hour."

"Sounds good," Mike said, sitting right next to Ashton, making their knees touch. "Hey, I'm liking the smell of your lip gloss…"

"Yeah, well, it's just some old junk I found in my jewelry box," Ashton said, scooting over. "Anyway, I was thinking we could do our project on volcanoes, so we can discuss tectonic plates and how they form-what are you doing?"

As she had been talking, Mike had slowly stretched his arms out so he had one arm around Ashton's shoulders.

"Just getting comfortable," he grinned. "Hey, it's a little bright in here…how about we dim the lights?"

"Um…no," Ashton frowned, pushing Mike's arm off of her. "Seriously, Mike, let's just focus and get this project done. Now how about you start finding some pictures for us to use and I'll start doing the research?"

"Okay, whatever you say," Mike said, pulling out his Pearpad.

Ashton shook her head as she opened up her laptop, determined to finish this project as soon as possible.

"Hey, did I leave my phone around here?" Jason asked, coming back into the room. "I was trying to call-oh, hey."  
He looked over at Mike.

"Mike, this is my older brother Jason," Ashton sighed, snatching her hand away from his, which was inching towards her. "Jason, this is Mike…my science partner."

"Okay, well, good luck with whatever your little project is on," Jason said, grabbing his phone as he headed back into the kitchen.

"I'm gonna need it," Ashton mumbled as Mike moved closer to her. She was already at the end of the couch so she had no more room to scoot away.

Just as Jason was about to enter the kitchen, he looked over his shoulder and saw this. He frowned and stopped in his tracks.

Maybe he'd stay in here for a moment…

"Mike, um, do you mind moving over a little?" Ashton asked. "I sort of have no room."

"That's okay, you can cuddle up next to me," Mike grinned.

"No, I don't _want _to cuddle next to you," Ashton said firmly. "I _want _us to get this project done so _you _can go home."

"Aw, Ashy, why are you so tense?" Mike said, leaning closer to her. "Maybe a little kiss will make you feel better."

"No!" Ashton said loudly. "Get away from me!"

"Okay!" Jason said loudly, causing Ashton and Mike to look over at him as he strode over. "We're done here."

He grabbed Mike's arm and began to pull him towards the door. "Time for you to go home, Mick or Mark or whatever your name was."

"It-It was Mi-" Mike stammered.

"Oh I don't care," Jason said, opening the front door. "Now, let me give you a piece of advice. If I were you, I'd stay away from my little sisters. I don't want you anywhere _near _either of them. You're clearly a scuzzy guy, and I don't like scuzzy guys. So if I find out you ever come near my sisters again or try anything with them, I'm going to make sure that you pay. Got it?"

"G-Got it," Mike nodded quickly.

"Great," Jason said brightly. "Bye now!"

"Wait-My Pearpad is in there still!" Mike said.

"We'll mail it to you," Jason said, slamming the door in the boy's face.

"Wow," Ashton said as Jason walked back over to her. "That was _awesome_! Did you see his stupid face? He was terrified."

"Yeah, well," Jason shrugged modestly. "What kind of older brother would just sit there while some jerk bugged his sister like that?"

"Thanks," Ashton smiled.

Jason put an arm around her. "Anytime."

"It sucks that I'm gonna have to wind up finishing this whole project on my own, though," Ashton sighed.

"Hey, I'll help you out," Jason said.

"Really? It's super boring," Ashton said.

"Eh, science is sort of my thing," Jason told her. "Come on, let's get started."

…

"We have to go back! That was the best thing ever!" Sam said excitedly later that evening as her and Freddie walked back into their home.

"Wow, who knew you'd wind up being such an opera fan," Freddie grinned as Sam kicked off her shoes.

"It was amazing!" Sam said. "The drama, the fighting, the yelling…it was almost like watching an MMA fight! Seriously, nub, when can we go back? Wanna go again this weekend?"

"I need time to let my eardrums heal," Freddie said as they couple walked into the living room. "I wonder if the kids are still awake. It's pretty late but-aw! Sam look!"

He nodded over to the sofa where Jason and Ashton were both fast asleep with Ashton's head was resting on Jason's shoulder.

"Aw, it's just like what they used to do when they were little," Sam whispered.

"Come on, let's go upstairs," Freddie said softly. "If we wake them they'll be back to their usual loud selves."

"Oh, right," Sam nodded, following her husband up the steps. "But for real, we should get those season passes for the theatre so we can always be up to date on all the operas that come here."

"I'm gonna kill Carly for this," Freddie mumbled, shaking his head.


	494. Chapter 494

_Ash_

"Sam, I can't bake any cookies if you sit there and eat all the cookie dough," Carly said, rolling her eyes as her best friend licking the mixing bowl she had been using.

"They taste better this way anyway," Sam shrugged.

"But I promised Spencer I'd bake him these cookies," Carly said. "You know he's had a rough week. First he got rejected by that cute girl at the junk yard, then Socko lost his lucky shoelaces, he set his lamp on fire and stained his new white shirt with the ashes, and then someone canceled on a sculpture order."

"So? It's not my fault his life's going lousy," Sam said.

"Just step away from the bowl," Carly said, swatting her away. "I want to get these in the oven before Freddie comes over to do iCarly with us."

Right on cue Freddie walked through the door with his laptop.

"Hey Carls," he said. He looked over at Sam. "Hello, _Sam_."

"Fredward," Sam said simply.

Carly frowned, confused. Usually the second Freddie walked through the door, Sam would be rushing over to greet him with a kiss that would most likely turn into a mini make-out session.

"We almost ready to start iCarly?" Freddie asked.

"Yeah, in a few minutes," Carly nodded.

"Alright, well I'll go get set up in the studio," Freddie said.

"Okay, I think Gibby's up there taking a nap, so try not to wake him. He get's crabby," Carly replied. She waited until Freddie disappeared before turning to Sam. "What was that about? Are you guys fighting?"

"Um…yeah," Sam mumbled.

"Well what happened?" Carly asked.

"I-It's nothing," Sam said quickly.

"It didn't seem like nothing," Carly said. "Come on, tell me, maybe I can help."

"Er, no, I-I don't think that's such a good idea," Sam said lamely.

"Sam," Carly sighed. "I'm your best friend. I'm not going to judge you or make you feel bad about anything that happened between you and Freddie. I just want to-"

"I _can't _tell you!" Sam exclaimed.

"What are you talking about? Sure you can," Carly said. "Just-"

"No, I mean I _really _can't tell you," Sam said. "I-I don't know what we're fighting about!"

"Huh?" Carly said. "How can you not know what you're fighting about?"

"I don't know!" Sam moaned. "We were talking online last night and we started fighting about _something _and then I went to bed and when I woke up I couldn't even remember what it was that we had been arguing about!"

"Oh my God…" Carly said, shaking her head. "You forgot an argument?"

"Yeah, I know!" Sam said. "I've been trying to figure out all morning what I'm supposed to be mad at him for!"

"You could _ask _him," Carly suggested.  
"Pfft, sure Carls, let me just go _ask _my boyfriend why I'm mad at him," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "He wouldn't use that as prime mocking material."

"Well Sam, if you forgot what you two were fighting about, it probably wasn't that big of a deal to begin with," Carly said. "So why don't you just go apologize for whatever it is that happened so you guys can move on and-"

"_Apologize_?" Sam scoffed. "Me? Are you _new_? He needs to apologize to _me_."

"But you don't even know what this whole thing is about!" Carly pointed out. "For all you know you could've been the one who was wrong in the first place!"

"That doesn't matter! I'm still not gonna be the one to apologize!"

"But-But-" Carly stammered, frustrated.

"This will just be like any of our other fights," Sam shrugged. "I'll wait a couple hours and soon Freddie will come and apologize and we'll be back to normal."

"_Normal _isn't exactly the word I'd use for you two," Carly mumbled.

….

Freddie headed into the iCarly studio, deep in thought.

It had almost killed him, giving Sam the cold shoulder like that and skipping their usual hello kiss, but he had to hold his ground.

He was mad at her, and he couldn't keep being the stepping mat in this relationship.

The problem was, though, that he didn't exactly know _why _he was supposed to be mad at her.

All he knew was last night while the two had been talking over their webcams they had had some sort of fight before they disconnected. He had gone to bed fuming but when he woke up this morning, he couldn't remember what their fight had been about at all.

But he _did _know that there was no way that he was going to admit that to Sam. For all he knew, this could be the one time in their relationship he had a chance at winning one of these arguments; he couldn't blow that just because of this one small detail.

_How could I have forgotten an entire fight? _Freddie thought to himself. _Think Benson! We were talking about weird dog names…then I think we moved on to how smart octopuses were…__**ugh! **__What was the argument about?_

He slammed the studio door shut, startling Gibby, who had been fast asleep on the beanbag chairs.

"What? I don't have anymore whipped cream!" Gibby yelled, jolting up. He looked over at Freddie. "Oh, it's you. Why'd you wake me up? I was napping!"

"Sorry, Gib," Freddie sighed. "I'm just a little on edge."

"Why? Did someone wake _you _up from a nap?"

"No," Freddie said. "It's just…me and Sam are having a little bit of a fight."

"So just apologize like you usually do," Gibby shrugged.

"No, not this time," Freddie said firmly. "This time I want _Sam _to come to _me_."

"Pfft, like she'd ever do that," Gibby said, rubbing his neck. "Aw man, I forgot to use my special pillow. Now I'm gonna have to see my chiropractor again."

"She will when she realizes that I'm _not_," Freddie said. "This could've been the one time where she was so totally, without a doubt, wrong that even _she _has to admit it!"

"What do you mean by 'it could've'?" Gibby asked.

"Well, er, I-I may have sort of forgotten what exactly we're arguing about," Freddie admitted.

Gibby burst out laughing. "That's the lamest thing I've ever heard!"

"Yeah, and getting your replica of your head stuck in the toilet last week was totally cool!" Freddie snapped, silencing Gibby's laughs right away.

"Hey! That was an accident!" Gibby defended. "I saw it work on the Internet!"

"I just…It just must've slipped my mind, that's all," Freddie said. "But that doesn't matter. I can still get an apology from Sam, even if I don't know what she should be apologizing for…"

…..

That afternoon, while the teens were filming iCarly bits, Sam and Freddie kept sneaking glances at one another.

Sam found herself really missing her and Freddie's usual interactions. It was weird not having him flash her a smile between takes or telling her how hot she looked in her costumes. It was especially hard because she _still _didn't know why it was that she was supposed to be mad at him; it was as though they were just cold shouldering each other for _nothing. _But Sam wasn't about to say anything…

Freddie was having a difficult time too.

More than anything, he wanted to just drop his stupid camera and run over to Sam and pull her into his arms.

They had never gone this long being mad at each other after an argument. Normally he'd have apologized by now and patched things up and they'd be back to their usual couple selves.

_Don't do it_, he willed himself, trying not think about how good Sam looked in her cowboy hat. _Not this time…Sooner or later Sam will come around_.

"Alright, I think we're done for today," Carly said a few hours later, putting down a stuffed squirrel they had been using as a prop. "You guys want to go grab a pizza or something now?"

"No," Freddie said, not looking at Sam. "I'm not hungry."

"Yeah, um, me neither," Sam mumbled.

Carly looked back and forth between them.

"Okay…" she said. She turned to Gibby. "Well do _you _want to go get something to eat?"

"Sure," Gibby said. "But I can't do pizza. I have an aerobics class tomorrow morning and I can't wear my stretchy pants if I'm all bloated."

Once Carly and Gibby left, Sam and Freddie stared awkwardly around the room, determined not to make eye contact.

Freddie stepped over to the green screen and began taking it down while Sam sat down on the beanbag chair and pulled out her phone.

She kept glancing over at him every time her turned his back to her, and whenever she would look down at her phone, he couldn't help but sneak a peek at her over his shoulder.

_God I hate this…_Freddie thought to himself. _Maybe I should just give it up. I mean, what if the reason we're mad at each other really __**is **__my fault and I __**should **__apologize. Maybe the longer I wait to do it, the more jerkish I'm being to her…_

_Ugh! I can't believe I've gone so being mad at him for something I don't even remember! _Sam thought angrily. _We haven't even kissed yet! We haven't gone this long without kissing in…forever! Maybe I should just suck it up and say I'm sorry. I mean, the nub always apologizes after all our stupid arguments when he was never really to blame; I should give him a break this one time. _

Sam and Freddie looked over at each other at the exact same moment, their eyes locking for the first time that whole afternoon.

For a moment, they simply stared at one another. Then, simultaneously, they both opened their mouths.

"I'm sorry!"

As they said those words, both of them felt as though a weight had been lifted off their chest as they rushed towards one another.

Freddie wrapped his arms around her tightly. "I'm sorry," he said again, finally feeling whole again as he held her. "I'm so sorry, baby, it was all my fault."

"No, it was mine," Sam said, hugging him back. "I was being stupid about, well, you know."

"No, Sam, _I _was being stupid," Freddie said. "I shouldn't have let this go on for so long. I can't stand us being mad like that."

"Me neither," Sam said. "But seriously, it was my fault. I should've just swallowed my pride for once and said I was sorry earlier so we didn't have to go through this."

Freddie sighed. "Um, Sam? I have a confession…I don't-I don't even know what were mad about this whole time. I-I remember arguing with you last night and then when I woke up this morning…I had nothing."

He expected Sam to laugh at him; to quickly jump on this chance to take back her apology and tell him exactly what it was that had happened last night that _did _in fact make this whole thing his fault.

But instead, her eyes widened. "What? You-You don't know what we were fighting about either?"

"I know, it's crazy," Freddie said. "But I-wait. What do you mean _either_?"

Sam gave him a small smile. "I-I sort of had no idea what we were fighting about this whole time either."

"What?" Freddie exclaimed.

"I had completely forgotten about it when I woke up this morning too," Sam explained. "But I didn't want to admit it…"

"I didn't want to admit it either!" Freddie said.

"Huh," Sam nodded slowly. "Well…I guess this has officially been the _dumbest _thing we've ever done."

"We spent the entire day literally being mad about _nothing_," Freddie said, shaking his head in disbelief.

"Carly's right…we _are _the most stubborn couple out there," Sam said.

"Yeah," Freddie agreed. "We really are…Hey, since we spent so long bing wazzed off at each other for something we can't even remember, how about we just forget about this and start making up for all the time we lost today."

"_That _sounds like a plan," Sam grinned, leaning up and kissing him.


	495. Chapter 495

_Coach_

"Can't your granddad take care of _himself_ after his knee surgery?" Sam moaned as she watched Carly pack up a small suitcase.

"He won't be able to walk," Carly pointed out. "And I'm just staying for the weekend. On Monday some nurse is coming in to help him."

"How'd Spencer get out of going?"

"He has some sculpture to finish by Sunday," Carly said, rolling his eyes. "Which he_ conveniently _let go until the last minute so he could use it as an excuse."

"Smart man," Sam grinned.

"Yeah, now I have to rub cream on his knee myself," Carly said, gagging a bit.

"Well what am _I _supposed to do here by myself?" Sam asked.

"You have a boyfriend," Carly shrugged. "Hang out with him."

Sam looked over at Carly's ice cream sandwich loveseat, where Freddie was intently playing a game on his laptop, oblivious to the girls' conversation.

"Yeah, I'm sure he'll be real entertaining," Sam scoffed.

"What's he doing?" Carly frowned.

"He's on some sort of _World of Warlords _streak," Sam sighed. "So he's been playing the game nonstop. Here, watch this."  
She cleared her throat. "Hey baby? Wanna go make-out?"

Freddie didn't look up from his screen.

"Wanna help me pick out a new bikini for the beach this summer?" Sam asked, again getting no response from Freddie.

"Wanna go to that train museum you've been begging to go to?"

Freddie was once again, completely silent, except for the small sounds coming from his computer.

"See?" Sam said, turning back to Carly. "Completely out of it."

"Wow," Carly chuckled. "He's gone."

"I can't believe you're sticking me here alone with my lame, zombie boyfriend," Sam sighed, flopping down on Carly's bed.

"Zombie?" Freddie said suddenly, finally looking up from the laptop.

"Oh, so you hear that but you don't hear my offers to go bikini shopping with you?" Sam smirked.

"Really?" Freddie said excitedly. "You're getting a new bikini?"

"Too late, nub," Sam said, thumping the back of his head. "Wipe the drool from your face."

"Since when are you so into _World of Warlords_?" Carly asked. "I mean I knew you were a geek when it came to that game, but you've never been this bad."  
"Since I finally found the perfect quest partner that can get me into the Valley of Torndant," Freddie said happily. "It's some girl from Australia. She's a level forty-six orc master."

"You see what I have to put up with?" Sam said, shaking her head.

"So you have a weekend alone with your girlfriend," Carly said slowly. "And you're going to spend it playing videogames?"

"Well what else would we do?" Freddie said, returning his attention to his game. "Yes! I got the Sword of Nettles!"

"I am so sorry," Carly said softly to Sam.

…..

"Alright Mr. Coffee Cup sculpture, one more layer of paint and you'll be all done," Spencer said, working on his sculpture in the living room the next day. "Wow, doing this whole thing in one day was a _latte _work. Ha! Get it? _Latte_?"

He looked around the empty apartment. "Dang it! Why is no one ever here for my good jokes?"

Just then the door opened and Freddie came in.

"Hey," Freddie greeted him. "Cool sculpture."

"Thanks," Spencer said. "I woke up at six to start it."

"Nice," Freddie nodded. "Anyway, is it cool if I hang out here today and do a little gaming on _War of Warlords_? My mom's giving me a hard time over at my place. She said this game is rotting my brain and giving me an inaccurate representation of medieval life."

"Yeah, sure," Spencer agreed. "When I finish this sculpture, I might log on and do a little gaming myself. My org's robe of sensibility was just upgraded!"

"Whoa! That's awesome!" Freddie grinned.

"I know!" Spencer said.  
"Well I'll see you later," Freddie said, starting for the stairs. "Hey, Sam is supposed to swing by later."

"Alright," Spencer said, turning back to his sculpture. "I'll send her up when she gets here."

When Freddie went upstairs, Spencer continued to work on his sculpture. About an hour later he had just finished the last touches and he stared proudly at his work.

"Done!" he said triumphantly. "And Carly said I should've started this weeks ago…ha!"

He took one last admiring look at the sculpture. "Okay, time for some good old _War of Warlords_! Hey, let me go see if Freddie wants to double up and go hunt in the Forest of Falsehood!"

He went up the steps to the iCarly studio. He was just about to open the door, though, when he heard Freddie's voice wafting down the hall as he talked to someone on his phone.

"I just don't know what to do anymore, Gib," Freddie sighed. "She's killing me! She's literally destroying me. Who would've ever thought that a girl could cause so many problems?"

Spencer frowned, pausing as he listened.

"I know I thought this would be a good thing," Freddie continued. "But it's just turning into one big nightmare. I may sound selfish, but I think I really need to end this relationship before it takes anymore of a toll on me."

_End a relationship? _Spencer thought curiously. _What is he talking about? What relationship is he-No! He can't be talking about his and Sam's relationship!_

"I mean already today she was supposed to meet me and she's late," Freddie said. "She's constantly taking my stuff, she _yells _at me for stupid things and she's completely irresponsible. I know she'll probably be heartbroken, but at this point, I don't care. I need to think about myself and what's best for me. And the thing that's best for me is getting out of this while I can."  
Spencer's eyes widened. Freddie _was _talking about breaking up with Sam! But-But how could he do that? He thought their relationship was going fine; was Freddie really that unhappy with it?"

_Oh no_, Spencer suddenly thought. _Sam…she's going to be crushed. She-She really loves Freddie_.

Slowly, so Freddie wouldn't know he had just heard his conversation, Spencer headed back downstairs and into his room.

What did he do now? He didn't want to see Sam get hurt. She was practically another little sister to him. She was going to be a wreck after Freddie did this to her…She was after the first time, after all, and that had been a _mutual _break-up. Spencer remembered how horrible he felt for her when he found her late that night in his living room…

…

_Spencer yawned as he shuffled out of his room for a cup of water. He was still thinking about Jenna. He supposed it was smart to end things with her; it __**was **__getting rather weird, dating someone who thought she was still your babysitter. _

_Still, she __**was**__ super hot…_

_As Spencer stepped out into the living room, though, he heard a soft sniffling noise and he saw that the T.V. was on, but no sound was coming from it. He looked over at the couch and was surprised to see Sam._

"_Sam?" he frowned. Normally when she stayed the night, she crashed up in Carly's room. _

_Sam spun her head around when she heard his voice, quickly wiping her eyes. "Oh…it's you. What are you doing up? It's three in the morning."_

"_Sam?" he said, his voice serious for once. "Were-Were you __**crying**__?"_

"_No!" Sam said a little too quickly. "No, I-I just-no."_

"_But your eyes are all red and you have tearstains all over your face," Spencer observed, glancing down at the box of tissues Sam had tried to hide behind a pillow. "Are you okay? Want me to go wake Carly?"_

_Sam shook her head. "No…"_

"_Want me to go get Freddie?" Spencer continued. "I'm sure he wouldn't mind coming over here. He'd want to know why his girlfriend was so upset."_

"_I'm not his girlfriend anymore," Sam mumbled, looking down at her lap. "We-We broke up."_

_Suddenly, Spencer understood exactly why she was crying. "What?" he said gently. "You guy-You really-You broke up?"_

"_Yeah," Sam whispered, her voice shaky. "A few hours ago. We-We decided we were too different to be in a relationship."_

"_Sam, I-I'm so sorry," Spencer said. "Er, are you sure you don't want me to go get Carly for you?"_

"_No, I-I'll tell her everything in the morning," Sam said. "I was just about to, um, go up and get some sleep anyway…sorry I woke you up."_

"_Sam?" Spencer said. "Are-Are you okay?"_

"_Yeah," Sam said at once. "Yeah, I'm fine. I just-I just…no."_

_And with that she had broken down, tears streaming down her face._

_So Spencer sat down next to her and put his arms around her and stayed with her the whole night. _

….

Spencer sighed. Was she going to be that devastated again? He couldn't stand to see Sam cry.

He suddenly felt a very strong surge of anger towards Freddie. He had always thought Freddie was a great kid, but now? Now he almost wanted to go back upstairs and teach him a lesson or two.

….

A few minutes after Spencer had gone into his room, Sam let herself into the apartment.

"Hey? Anyone here?" she called.

She looked around the empty living room, shrugged, and then headed up the studio where sure enough, Freddie was sitting on the beanbag chairs, playing his computer game.

"You gonna pause that long enough to at least _kiss _me?" Sam said, rolling her eyes as she sat down next to him.

"Hey," Freddie smiled, giving her a quick kiss. "Where were you? I thought you were gonna be here an hour ago."

"I stopped for some chicken," Sam said simply. "So how goes your stupid warlords?"

"Bad," Freddie sighed. "You remember that girl from Australia who I joined up with?"

"Sure," Sam nodded. "Well pretend I listen to you when you talk about this chiz."

"Well I _thought _she'd be a great gaming partner," Freddie said, ignoring Sam's comment. "But she sucks! She's been stealing my gold coins, she was late for our quest to take down the trolls and she just let me get shot with an arrow because she was busy picking apples form the tree of tranquility!"

"Aw, is your Internet chick not good enough for you anymore?" Sam smirked.

"No!" Freddie said. "She's horrible! I was just telling Gibby that I'll have to end our quest relationship before she winds up costing me my game status."  
"So then end it," Sam said.

"I can't! I don't know how to end an online quest relationship!" Freddie said. "Hey, you do it."

"Me?" Sam moaned.

"Yeah, come on, you're my girlfriend," Freddie said. "It's your job to end any quest relationships I get myself into. I would do it for you."

"Like I'd be caught anywhere near this game," Sam said, rolling her eyes as she snatched Freddie's laptop from him. "Fine, I'll do it. But I'm not responsible for any emotional damage I may cause her."

"Thanks, baby, you're the best," Freddie said, kissing her again. "Hey, how about I take a break from the game and the two of us go get some smoothies. My treat."

"You better believe it is," Sam said.

"Great," Freddie said. "Once you finish this, then we can-ugh!"

"What is it?" Sam asked, looking up as Freddie stared down at his phone.

"My mom," Freddie told her. "Apparently my sneakers didn't pass her weekly dirt inspection and now I have to go home and let her soak my feet in some weird chemicals."

"Wow," Sam chuckled.

"I'll be back in a little bit," Freddie said, shaking his head. "After my _feet _get abused."

"Have fun," Sam grinned.

After she finished sending the break-up letter to Freddie's Australian quest partner, Sam headed back downstairs and sat down on the couch. She grabbed the remote and turned on the television.

At that moment, Spencer came out of his bedroom. He spotted Sam sitting so happily on the couch, not a care in the world.

_I have to tell her_, he decided. _At least if I warn her, she won't be caught so off guard._

"Oh, hey Spence," Sam said, looking over her shoulder. "Hey, come watch this show. It's about some dude who has to coach his daughter's soccer team after he switches brains with a fish. It sounds so stupid it _has _to be good, right?"

"Um, Sam?" Spencer said heavily. "I need to talk to you about something."

Sam frowned. "Um…is this about me eating your special cupcakes? Because Carly didn't tell me they were yours until after-"

"No, it's not about that," Spencer said. "It's about you and Freddie."  
Sam gave him a confused look. "Me and Freddie? What about us?"

"It's-It's something I overheard," Spencer sighed, sitting down next to her.

"Well what is it?" Sam asked, turning off the T.V.

"Okay," Spencer said, taking a deep breath. "Before I do…just know that even though Carly's not here right now, I'm still here and I'll help you get through this."  
"Dude, you're freaking me out," Sam said. "What's going on? Is he okay?"

"_He's _just fine," Spencer muttered darkly. "It's just-Freddie…he-he-he's going to break up with you!"

Sam's eyes widened. "W-What?" she said softly.

"I didn't want you to be caught off guard," Spencer explained gently. "But I overheard him talking about doing it."

"But-But I thought we were doing pretty good," Sam said, her eyes already growing wet. "We've been back together for six months…he seemed happy!"

"I know," Spencer said.

"Are-Are you _sure _he's breaking up with me?" Sam asked desperately.

"Yeah," Spencer said, putting an arm around her. "I'm so sorry, Sam. I know how much you loved him."

"I-I just-I don't understand," Sam mumbled. "I was upstairs with him five minutes ago and he seemed normal! We were even about to go get smoothies…oh jeez, you think he was gonna break up with me then?"

Spencer handed her a tissue. "I'm sorry," he said again. "Do you need anything? Food? Ice cream? Light-up socks?"

"No," Sam said weakly. "I-I just…I'm gonna go upstairs. I sort of want to be alone. Um, thanks for telling me, I guess."

"Sam, you sure you don't want me to get you anything?" Spencer asked, his heart shattering at the look on her face.

She shook her head. "No…"

_I'm gonna murder Freddie_, Spencer thought as he watched Sam go upstairs. _How could he do this to her? How could he just break her heart and-_

"Well good news," Freddie said, bursting in through the front door. "I managed to talk my mom out of the foot cleaning! Now we can-Oh, hey Spence. I thought Sam would be down here by now. She still upstairs?"

"Yes!" Spencer snapped. "She is!"

"Um…okay," Freddie frowned. "Well then I'll just go up there and-"

"No! You've done enough!" Spencer said firmly.

"Huh? What are you talking about?" Freddie asked. "Why are you acting all weird?"

"Because," Spencer said, crossing his arms. "I, unlike you, care about Sam's feelings!"

"What do you mean I don't care about her feelings?" Freddie said, confused. "Of course I care about her feelings; I _love _her."  
"Sure you do," Spencer scoffed. "That's why you don't care about stomping all over her heart. I should stomp all over your face!"

"Dude!" Freddie exclaimed. He had never seen Spencer so angry. "_What _are you talking about? How am I stomping all over her heart? I was just about to buy her a smoothie!"

"Oh I see, you were going to buy her a _smoothie_!" Spencer jeered. "That would make up for _everything _wouldn't it?"

"Make up for _what_?"

"Well let me tell you something, mister!" Spencer continued. "You can't just buy a girl a smoothie and then break up with her! Especially not Sam! Don't you care about how hurt she's going to be? How sad and-"  
"Break up with her?" Freddie repeated. "Okay, _what _are you going on about? I'm not breaking up with Sam! I told you, I _love _her!"

"Oh give it a rest, I heard you talking with Gibby," Spencer said. "You said you were ending your relationship because she was irresponsible and yelled at you and _blah, blah, blah_. Well guess what? I already told Sam all about your little plan so she's not going to have to have her heart destroyed in the middle of the Groovy Smoothie!"

Freddie's eyes widened. "What? Spencer! You _told _Sam I was breaking up with her!"

"Yes I did," Spencer said proudly. "You think you can things past old Spencer? Ha! Think again! You'll have to be smarter than that to-"

"I wasn't going to break up with her!" Freddie yelled. "What you overheard me talking about…that was about my quest partner on _War of Warlords_!"

Spencer's smug grin faltered. "Er, what?"

"I was telling Gibby that I was going to end my quest arrangement on the game because my partner was horrible!" Freddie cried. "I wasn't talking about breaking up with Sam!"

"I-Oh…" Spencer said lamely. "Oh…well, um, maybe-maybe we should get upstairs and do some explaining…"

"Why? Just because you made my girlfriend think I was gonna dump her?" Freddie snapped.

"Alright! I might have made a tiny mistake-"

"_Tiny_?!"

"-But shouldn't we be concerned with _fixing _this?" Spencer said.

"Fine! Come on!" Freddie said, starting for the stairs.

Him and Spencer went up the studio where Sam was sitting.

"Sam!" Freddie said, rushing into the room. "Sam, this whole thing has been a huge understanding. I'm not-"

"Oh save it, Fredwad!" Sam said angrily. Freddie could see that her face was tearstained, but she seemed well beyond sad right now.

She looked positively furious.

"Sam, Spencer made a mistake," Freddie started quickly. "I never wanted to-"

"What? So you think you can just break up with me after all the chiz I've done for you?" Sam exclaimed. "I stopped those jerks from giving you and your AV buddies wedgies last week! I took you to the Space Needle for your birthday! I even spent three hours with you on the Internet trying to figure out what that mole was on your back! I was the best thing to ever happen to your nerdy little life!"

"Yes! You were!" Freddie nodded. "Sam, listen to me! I don't want to break up with you! I was never _planning _on breaking up with you!"

"Yeah right!" Sam said harshly. "Spencer heard you talking about it."

"Er…about that," Spencer said, giving a nervous chuckle. "Apparently there was a problem with the communication on that."  
"What do you mean?" Sam frowned.

"Spencer _though _he overheard me talking to Gibby about breaking up with you," Freddie explained. "But I was just telling Gibby about my _War of Warlords _problem. You know, about me wanting to end things with my quest partner?"

"Yeah, Sam, I'm really sorry," Spencer said. "I just…panicked."

Sam looked over at Freddie. "You-You're not breaking up with me?"

"Why would I break up with you?" Freddie smiled. "I love you."

Sam smiled back at him. "Oh…well, um, good. So…we still on for smoothies?"

"Sure," Freddie nodded, holding his arms out.

Sam stepped into his embrace, hugging him tightly. When they pulled away, Freddie gave her a quick kiss.

"Hey, I-I'll meet you downstairs," Sam said to Freddie.

"Alright," Freddie agreed. He turned to head back downstairs.

"Hey," Spencer said quickly. "So…no hard feelings about me almost wrecking your relationship, right?"  
Freddie rolled his eyes. "Nah, we're good."

"Cool," Spencer said, relieved.

Once Freddie had left, Spencer turned to Sam.

"Sam, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have told you that without being one hundred percent sure," Spencer sighed. "I just didn't want you to get hurt…"

Sam nodded. "I know," she said. She stepped closer to him. "Thanks for trying to protect me. Even though I didn't actually need you to…"

Spencer gave a small laugh, and Sam opened her arms and hugged him.


	496. Chapter 496

_Sauce_

"Here, now put in a little bit of salt," Sam told nine-year old Tyler as the two stood in front of a pot on the stove. "And then put in this garlic…that's right."

"Can I try the sauce now, mom?" Tyler asked.

"Sure," Sam smiled. "But be careful, it's hot."

Tyler picked up the wooden spoon and took a taste. "It's good!" he said happily. "I'm a good chef, aren't I?"

"The best," Sam chuckled. "Alright, now we just let this simmer here for a little bit. Why don't you go get washed up and tell Jason dinner's ready? By that time hopefully your dad will be back with your sisters and we can all eat."

"Okay," Tyler nodded, running upstairs.

Sam began to set the table just as she heard the front door open.

"Mom!" she heard her daughters yell as they stormed into the kitchen.

"What?" Sam asked.

"Dad completely ruined our lives at school!" thirteen-year old Emma said, crossing her arms.

"Yeah!" Ashton agreed. "He _humiliated _us in front of all our friends!"

"Okay, I think 'humiliate' is a strong word," Freddie said, rolling his eyes as he walked into the room after the twins.

"No it's not!" Emma snapped.

"What happened?" Sam asked.

"I was waiting to pick them up from their practices at their school," Freddie explained. "And they were both running late; I must've been sitting in the car for twenty minutes and neither of them answered their phones when I called them. So all I did was get out of the car and go into the school to see what was taking them so long."  
"You got out of the car?" Sam grinned. "Bad call, baby. Parents aren't supposed to _ever _get out of the car."

"Thank you!" Ashton exclaimed. "_Clearly _dad didn't get the memo! He just comes into the gym wearing that _hideous _sweater demanding to know what's taking so long!"

"I didn't _demand_," Freddie said. "All I did was walk over to their coaches and ask how much longer practice was going to be."

"All you did?" Emma repeated. "You embarrassed us! Thanks to us, we're now going to be known as the girls with the impatient dad who just barges into practices! I'm gonna be the joke of the soccer team now!"

"Yeah, and I can just forget about that cheer captain position thanks to you!" Ashton said hotly.

"All I did was walk into a school gym!" Freddie defended. "You guys are acting like I committed some huge crime here. I bet you no one else even noticed me."

"How could they not have noticed you? You were wearing _slippers_!" Emma cried, pointing down at her father's feet.

Sam looked down and saw that Freddie was in fact wearing his favorite slippers. "Dude, really? _Slippers_?"

"Well they're comfy!" Freddie hissed. "And my feet were getting cold waiting out in the car!"

"Well I hope you're happy, dad!" Ashton said. "We're gonna have to change schools now! God, this is the worst day ever! I hate you!"

"Yeah, I hate you too!" Emma said. "And those slippers!"

"Well," Freddie sighed as the girls stomped upstairs. "_That _was pleasant."

"Eh, don't worry about it," Sam said, giving him a quick kiss. "They're teenage girls; even _mentioning _parents is humiliating to them. They'll get over it."

"Yeah, I hope," Freddie said. "You know, if they knew what my mom put me through, they'd think nothing of me going into the gym in my slippers. I mean she once barged into my math class because I didn't finish my milk at breakfast!"

"Ha, I remember that," Sam smiled. "I think I got it on video…But that wasn't as bad as the time she came and started yelling at you by your locker about forgetting to wear your anti-tick underwear. Or the time she-"

"Thank you!" Freddie snapped.

…..

During dinner that night, neither Emma nor Ashton said a single word to Freddie. Sam could see that Freddie was upset by this, but he was trying his best not to let it show.

"So, at work today a buddy of mine told me that there's going to be a _Galaxy Wars _marathon on the sci-fi channel," Freddie said, twirling some spaghetti onto his plate. "We should watch it, shouldn't we, Em?"  
Emma didn't even look at Freddie as she took a bite of her garlic bread.

"Um…anyway," Freddie said, clearing his throat. "Ashton? I know you said you wanted to go check out that new bookstore that opened up across town. Want to take a trip over there tomorrow after school?"  
Ashton stared down at her plate and didn't reply.

After dinner, the girls went back up to their room and Sam and Freddie began clearing the table.

"Freddie, the girls are just wazzed off," Sam told her gently. "I told you, give them until the morning and then they'll be back to normal."

"I hate having them mad at me though," Freddie sighed.

"I know, but all kids are mad at their parents at some point," Sam reasoned. "If they're not, then the parents aren't too good at their jobs, are they? I mean you know how often they're mad at me for something? Just last week Jason was mad at me because I wouldn't buy him a new videogame."

"Remember when our kids liked us?" Freddie smiled, putting an arm around her. "And they wanted to be seen with us and didn't think we were the worst people on earth?"

"I told you, teenagers suck," Sam said. "But at least we still have a few years with Tyler before he turns."

"That's true," Freddie agreed. "Hey…maybe this is a sign. Maybe we should start thinking about having another baby and-"

"Dude, we've been through this," Sam said. "We'll have another baby when science makes it possible for _you _to carry it."

…..

That night Sam stood in front of the twins' door and knocked before she opened it and stepped inside.

The girls were lying on their beds and they both looked up when Sam came in.

"Oh, hi mom," Ashton said, closing her homework. "We thought you were dad coming in to torture us more."

"Yeah," Emma nodded. "Hey, can you pick us up from practice from now on?"

"Guys, come on," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Yes your dad embarrassed you today. But can't you just forget about it now?"

"No way!" Ashton said.

"Yeah, dad broke the 'no parent gets out of the car at school' rule," Emma said.

"Okay, guys, you both know that's not an actual rule," Sam said. "Don't you think you're blowing this whole thing out of proportion just a little bit? No one's even going to remember your dad walking into your practices tomorrow."

"Yeah right," Ashton mumbled. "God, dad's the worst dad ever.'  
"Seriously," Emma nodded.

"Hey!" Sam said firmly, catching the twins by surprise. "Don't you _ever _say that again."

"But it's true!" Ashton said.

"Yeah, dad's always embarrassing us and doing dumb things," Emma said. "Remember that time we were out grocery shopping with him and steered his cart into the soda display?"

"And the time he made that light up sign for my cheerleading competition last year that almost caught on fire," Ashton added.

"So?" Sam said. "Who cares? That doesn't make him a bad dad! He _loves _all you guys more than anything in the world and he'd do _anything _to make sure you all are happy. You want to know what a bad dad would do for you? _Nothing_. A bad dad wouldn't have been there clapping louder than anyone in the audience when you made the honor roll last semester, Ashton. A bad dad wouldn't have spent an entire weekend teaching you how to fence, Emma. A bad dad wouldn't care about you at all! He'd never spend any time with you or do things for you or even tell you that he loved you just one time! You know how much I wanted a dad like you guys have now when I was your age? You know how badly I wanted someone who'd be there for me no matter what? And here you two are saying you _hate _your dad just because he did something dorkish!"

Emma and Ashton looked down at their laps.

"We-We don't actually hate him," Emma said softly.

"Yeah, we love him," Ashton nodded.

"I know you guys do," Sam said, lowering her voice. "Just…know how good you've got it, okay? Because there's lots of other kids out there who'd love to have a dad around to embarrass them."

…..

The next morning Freddie was in the kitchen making breakfast for the family.

He had just slid a few plates of eggs onto the table when Emma and Ashton shuffled into the kitchen.

"Morning girls," Freddie said. "Who wants toast with their-"

He was cut off, though, as both girls stepped over to him and wrapped their arms around him.

"We love you, daddy," Emma said.

"Yeah, even if you're nerdy and embarrassing," Ashton nodded. "You're still the best dad in the whole world."

Freddie smiled and hugged the girls back. "Thanks guys…I love you too."


	497. Chapter 497

_Ceremony_

"Wow, you look like a zombie, baby," Freddie grinned as his fiancé let herself into their shared apartment.

"_You _try wedding planning with Carly for six whole hours and we'll see how _you _look," Sam mumbled, collapsing onto the couch next to him. "How come _you _don't get dragged to these meetings? It's your wedding too!"

"Hey, I tried," Freddie defended, giving Sam a quick kiss. "I _wanted _to be involved in the wedding planning. But Carly kept knocking down all my ideas and _kindly _told me that 'wedding planning is a complex activity that traditionally revolves around the bride and her maid of honor and really has no place for the groom until the actual wedding'. And I _did _write, address, and send out all the wedding invitations _and _I made sure my tux is all set."

"Yeah, well I just had to endure making up seating arrangements and finalizing the flower arrangements for the reception," Sam said. "I don't know why that had to take six hours! Just slap eight people at each table and shove a vase of flowers in the middle of each. Done!"

"Eh, give Carly a break," Freddie said. "Sure she might be, er, overbearing right now, but think of how great our wedding ceremony is going to be thanks to her."

"It better be, after all that time I spent looking at _tablecloths_," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"It's all going to be done in a week," Freddie said, wrapping his arms around her. "In one week all this wedding chaos will be over and you and I will finally be husband and wife."

"Yeah," Sam smiled, looking up at him. "I guess that will make all this chiz worth it."

She leaned up and kissed him again. "Hey, I'm gonna go take a shower and then you wanna watch a movie in bed and just relax?"

"Sure," Freddie nodded. "I'll go make us some popcorn."

"Sweet," Sam grinned, getting to her feet. "Make the extra-butter kind."

Freddie watched as Sam disappeared into their bedroom.

He really couldn't wait until he could officially call her his wife. He loved her so much and he couldn't imagine spending his life with anyone but her.

He headed into the kitchen and popped a bag of popcorn, drizzling a bit of melted butter on it for Sam. Then he went into their bedroom and lay down on their bed, hearing the shower still running in the adjoining bathroom.

He began flipping through the channels of the television, trying to find something they'd both enjoy.

"Hey, get off the sci-fi channel right now," Sam said, stepping out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel. "I am _not _putting up with that."

"Alright, alright," Freddie said. "I think there's some comedy on this channel…"

"Fine," Sam agreed, grabbing her pajamas out of her drawer. "Let me just get dressed and-"

"Er, baby? Could-Could you do me a favor and, um, get dressed in the bathroom?" Freddie said slowly, trying not to stare at her.

Sam raised an eyebrow. "What? Dude, we've lived together for a year now. Trust me, you've _seen _everything."

"Yes, but if I _see _everything now I'm gonna probably explode," Freddie told her.

Sam grinned. During the wedding planning, Sam and Freddie both decided that even though they had done it plenty of times before, they wanted their first night as husband and wife to be special. So exactly one month before their wedding date, they vowed that they wouldn't do _anything _until that night.

Sam had been ready to quit after the first week, and by the second week, even Freddie was beginning to regret this decision. But so far neither of them had cracked and at this point it was only their wills that kept them following through with their agreement.

"You could close your eyes," Sam told him.

"Like I wouldn't be tempted to peek," Freddie pointed out.

"Fine, whatever," Sam said, going back into the bathroom.

"Thank you!" Freddie called after her.

Once Sam was dressed, she crawled into bed next to Freddie and began popping popcorn kernels into her mouth, resting her head on his shoulder. "One more week, baby," she told him, squeezing his hand.

"One long week," Freddie mumbled.

"I know," Sam said. "But hey, _I _was the one who said we should forget about this thing weeks ago. _You _had to be the reasonable one. If it wasn't for you, we could be doing a whole lot more than watching a movie right now."

"Yes, I was very stupid, thank you," Freddie snapped.

Sam laughed, kissing his temple. "It will be worth it though…just keep telling yourself that. Hey, maybe the movie will get your mind off everything."

"Maybe," Freddie sighed.

So for almost a full hour, the couple sat on the bed in silence, wrapped in one another's arms, enjoying the movie.

"Hey," Freddie said suddenly. "Can I ask you something, Sam?"

"What?" Sam replied, curious. "Are you as lost with this flick as I am? Because why in the world would that chick try and sell her sister's computer for-"

"No, it's not about the movie," Freddie said quickly. "It's-It's actually about something that's been on my mind for awhile now."

"Oh," Sam frowned, muting the television. "What is it then?"

"Well…like we've said, we _are _going to be married in a week," Freddie said.

"Yeah…" Sam nodded. "And?"

"And, well…I've-I've just got to know once and for all," Freddie said. "_When _did you start to fall for me?"  
"_What_?" Sam scoffed. "Dude, I've told you before."

"No you haven't," Freddie replied.

"Yes I have!" Sam nodded. "Years ago. When we were first dating and we were at the Groovy Smoothie. I told you-"

"Yeah, I know what you told me," Freddie said. "You told me it was when you pushed me into a bike messenger and my head hit the fire hydrant."

"Right," Sam said. "There you go."

"Sam," Freddie sighed. "You and I both know that wasn't the truth."

"Sure it was," Sam said, though not making eye contact.

"You may be able to lie pretty good, but I always know when you are," Freddie said, giving her a small smile. "Come on, why won't you just tell me when you _really _fell for me?"

"Hmmm...no."

"Sam!"

"Alright, maybe…how about this?" Sam said. "So there might be a _bit _more to me starting to fall for you than I ever told you. If you can guess when it was, I'll tell you if you're right."

"You're going to make me _guess_?" Freddie exclaimed. "What kind of fiancé doesn't tell her future husband these things just off the bat?"

"Come on, it will be fun," Sam told him. "_And _it will distract you from certain _other _things."

"But what if I don't guess it?" Freddie said.

"Well," Sam said, leaning back on the bed. "We're gonna be spending the rest of our lives together, baby. You've got time."

…..

"Alright, I got it," Freddie said the next morning as Sam poured herself some coffee. "It _had _to be after our first kiss on the fire escape."

"Nope," Sam said simply. "And you guessed that last night already."

"Well then…I know!" Freddie continued. "It was when I had all those girls chasing after me because of that vampire video we did on iCarly!"

"As if," Sam said, rolling her eyes.

"What about after we spent all that time crammed in the space simulator?" Freddie tried again.

"Dude, after being crammed in there for you, I wanted to punch your eyes out, not _love _you," Sam replied.

"Can you at least give me a time reference to work with?" Freddie moaned.

"Sure," Sam smiled. "It was between the time I met you and the time you proposed to me."

"Oh, _that's _helpful!"

"Well you should've just stuck to my story about the bike messenger," Sam shrugged, taking one last sip of her coffee. "Okay, I have to go to work. I'll see you tonight."

"Can you just _tell _me?" Freddie asked for the tenth time.

Sam grinned, giving him a quick kiss. "Not a chance. Later, Fredweiner!"

"Sam! Sam just-ugh!" Freddie slumped down at the kitchen table, hastily pouring himself a bowl of cereal. He just _had _to fall in love with the most stubborn girl out there, didn't he?  
…

"Ugh, my boss is a nut job," Sam said that evening when she returned home. "So me and Carly were on our lunch break, and she just comes-"

"Was it when we went camping to try and find Bigfoot?" Freddie said at once.

"Well hi to you too," Sam said, rolling her eyes as she kicked off her shoes.

"Hi," Freddie said quickly, giving her a short peck. "So yes or no to the bigfoot thing?"

"No, nub," Sam said. "_Please _tell me you haven't been obsessing about this all day. I mean you texted me a dozen times while you were at work."

"Well then was it when we went to Wisconsin for that stupid wedding?" Freddie asked anxiously. "Or when we went to Webicon? Or-"

"Baby, calm down," Sam said, a bit concerned. "Let's just eat dinner and-"

"No! I've got to be close now!" Freddie said. "Was it when you and Carly were fighting and you both quit iCarly?"

"No!" Sam said. "And no more guesses tonight; you've gone insane!"

"Then just tell me!" Freddie said desperately. "It's killing me not knowing!"

"Dude, just forget about it for a little," Sam said. "Why don't you go sit and I'll order us Chinese food and-"

"I can't sit!" Freddie said, pacing back and forth. "Why are you _doing _this to me, Sam? Do you _enjoy _torturing me?"

"I'd say you're doing a pretty good job of torturing yourself right now," Sam said.

"Just _tell _me!" Freddie moaned. "_When _did you start falling for me? I'm running out of ideas here, Sam!"

"I'm gonna go order some eggrolls," Sam said, shaking her head at her fiancé. "You go de-crazy yourself!"

"Sam!" Freddie cried as Sam headed into the kitchen. "Tell me!"

…

That evening Freddie was getting ready for bed, the gears in his head still churning trying to figure out when it could've been that Sam had developed feelings for him.

"Okay," he heard a voice behind him. "I'll tell you."

He spun around and saw Sam leaning against the doorframe of their bedroom.

"Seriously?" he said, relief flooding through his body as Sam sat down on their bed.

"Yeah," Sam sighed. "I mean it would put a damper in the wedding next week if the groom winds up getting sent to a mental hospital. And after all this planning, there _will _be a wedding and you _will _be there."

"So when was it?" Freddie asked anxiously, sitting down next to Sam.

Sam gave him a small smile. "The bike messenger story wasn't actually too far off…you _were_ pretty beat up when I realized I had feelings for you. But, um, it wasn't from hitting your head on a fire hydrant…it was a lot earlier….when-when you got hit by that taco truck."

"Taco truck?" Freddie repeated. "Oh right!"

"Yeah, I mean it was pretty scary," Sam shrugged. "You got hit by a _truck_. And you were just laying on the street in pain and everything. I-I sort of thought…I thought you were done for. I-I didn't know if you were going to be okay or-or if you were seriously hurt or _what._ But all I knew was that I-I couldn't handle losing you because-because, well, I liked you. A lot. I mean, I guess I had liked you a little before then, but I didn't even realize it. After our first kiss I couldn't stop thinking about it, but I just thought that was because I had finally gotten it out of the way. And a few months before you got hit by the truck, I-I had seen you dancing the Groovy Smoothie with Carly after that lame Sadie Hawkins dance and I felt like I got punched in the stomach, but I figured that was just because I was bummed about being left out. But after thinking I would never get to see you again for real…that's when I knew."

"Sam…" Freddie said softly. "After I got hit by the taco truck…that's-that's when I started going out with Carly."  
Sam looked down at her lap. "Yeah. Yeah, that-that wasn't exactly fun to watch."

Freddie felt a pang of guilt. So right after Sam realized she had feelings for him, he had gone and started seeing her best friend…

"I mean I figured Carly was sort of just into you because you saved her life," Sam mumbled. "But still…So I tried for the next year to squash my feelings for you, and I was doing pretty good, too. But then that night at the lock-in I just, well, you know the story."

"Sam, I'm so sorry," Freddie said gently.

Sam looked back up at him. "Dude, don't be sorry. How were you supposed to know? Besides, it was like, ten years ago almost. We're getting married in less than a week."

"I know," Freddie said. "I just-I hate that I made you feel that way, even if I didn't know at the time."

"Well, you've more than made up for it with all the times you've managed to make me feel far from sucky," Sam smiled. "And now that you officially know when I lost all my senses and fell for you, will you stop obsessing?"

"Yes I will," Freddie grinned, giving her a kiss.

"Good," Sam said, getting up off the bed. "Now come on."  
"Where are we going?" Freddie asked.

"Carly's," Sam replied. "She wanted me to come by and okay playlists for the reception and if I'm gonna suffer through that, you're gonna be right there with me. That's what marriage is all about, after all."


End file.
